(Planner/Journaling) Addiction and Obsession are NOT cute.
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 10 ก.พ. 2025
- If I take away the descriptors "planner/journaling" and I just leave addiction and obsession, then it's not cute. That's because it's not cute.
This is not a debate about this topic, but a safe space for those for whom this resonates. If you disagree or feel offended, this is not the place to discuss it.
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You are so brave to get real in this video. It's a truth bomb. 💣. Words like planner hopping and planner anxiety are evidence of the craziness in the community. In the tarot community it's the same thing. And they talk about deck overwhelm and culling collections because of it. One pen, one book is all we need. The notebook I use now is a second-hand filofax domino which is filled with cut down leftover notebooks. And I love it. Thank you for being here.
Thank you for sharing your insights. Planner anxiety and deck overwhelm sound like mental health diagnoses for conditions that don't or shouldn't even exist. It's as if people realize it's not healthy or cool, and then just keep doing it anyway. I swear, I feel like I'm stuck in an episode of "Black Mirror." Adults have just checked out. And I get it. What is going on in the world is a lot, but IF we check out, it's going to get a helluva lot worse and very quickly. It's like we're inviting the distracting. Like if we don't look, the monsters aren't there. They're there. Thank you for reading and for your feedback.
@@TrinaOGorman it's positive that people are getting more aware of the commercial influencing that's going in in social media. It's a slow process though
@@TrinaOGorman I have absolutely been checking out regularly. It has gotten worse for sure. We have to stay on our game for our kids' sake.
Finally someone said it! There was a recent post on the hobonichi subreddit asking for TH-cam and IG recommendations of people who don't swap planners constantly. And then this video pops up in my recommended. It feels like fate.
Honestly, this video is so interesting and hopefully kicks off a form of discourse within the planner community. Sorry my comment is a bit long. I feel like I could write a whole 5-page essay in response because of how many thoughts this kicked off. I've listened to this a few times already just to make sure that everything you've said actually hits home and that I'm not missing/misunderstanding points. THANK YOU for being honest and open about your experiences.
I absolutely felt called out at the beginning of this video because I have actively said to my therapist as we work through my overplanning "It's stress relieving." And that's true! Until it's not. Spending a bit of time at the beginning of my week to set up a very minimal and functional spread that helps me keep track of tasks, habits, and some health information that's important to me to track -- that's all fine in my opinion. As soon as I find myself staring at my planner for extended periods of time and not actually doing anything -- that's when I realize that I have a problem and I need to start moving. On the flip side, if I'm not doing any planning at all, things fall between the cracks and I start struggling.
*Using* notebooks and stationery that genuinely want to try or consistently enjoy isn't the problem and I feel like people who disagree with your sentiments will get bogged down with that thought (initially I was trying to grapple with that thought too). The point is that (as many of the comments are saying and the title of the video) buying stationery to the point that it is a legitimate addiction IS A PROBLEM. Adding a sticker or two because it makes you happy isn't the problem, it's agonizing over how you placed the sticker because it doesn't look good to you. Or in my personal experience: spending so much time planning for things in your life but not actually accomplishing any of my goals is a problem.
Aesthetics have taken over the planner world. I couldn't use bullet journals consistently because they never felt "good enough." I wasn't inspired to fill them out because they didn't look as good as the rest of the community's. My preferred style during most of college was a minimalist aesthetic, but in my head it was constant "nope, too messy, you didn't do all of your habits today so it looks bad, you're not good enough." And unfortunately, unresolved trauma and mental health comorbidities that has led to deeply rooted insecurity and perfectionism is exactly the combination that planning TH-cam is catered to. Alongside my love of stationery, my future as someone seeking validation through planning can be traced to these years in college. I may have stuck to just buying one notebook each year back then, but as I've been discovering the beautiful world of stationery this summer, all of these feelings of insecurity are rushing back. And with hobonichi month happening, I'm taking a lot of time for self reflection and learning what works for me as a functional planner so that I don't 'self-medicate' by shopping.
I think most of us need therapy (in whatever form that takes - seeing a therapist, writing, whatever works), not more planners.
I don't know if this is in your style of video (newly subscribed as of today), but if you ever wanted to make a video about "when to change your planner/planning system vs when to change how you're using your planner/planning system," I will be one of the first to click on! :)
Thanks for this awesome video!
EDIT: I'm also really curious about neurodivergent people and their experiences within the planner community. So again, I hope this video sparks discussion in this community and we hear from more people!
Hello. It’s late here, but I wanted to respond to you. So much of what you’re saying struck a chord. YOU are the reason why I said what I said. And by you, I mean people who are struggling with all of this, along with perfectionism, and all of the trappings. The relationship that all of this has to trauma and abuse comes up repeatedly. Over and over again, I see the same patterns of behavior from people who have had negative childhood experiences or some other sort of trauma. That was and is me.
And when I say all of that and people still want to get bent out of shape over me talking about their stickers and planners, I feel like I am trapped inside of some sort of insane alternate universe, in which people care more about Hobonichi Techi than legitimate concerns about the mental health and well-being of those who have experienced trauma.
I am a college writing professor. I teach college writing and I’ve taught many journaling workshops, but they are about writing.
Anyway, I’m not sure I touched on everything that you wrote, but just wanted to write back and connect. Have a good night. ❤️
I am neurodivergent with many mental health diagnoses and I hear you and feel you. I absolutely would like a video like that.
I felt so seen and heard because this planner community is a very slippery slope and it’s quick to lose the purpose of the planner when the intention is no longer for functionality but esthetics. Thank you for bringing me back down to reality especially for the new planner season. I personally rely on my Hobonichi mega weeks because I needed a catch all book that could travel with me; HOWEVER I also don’t need $100 worth of stickers and ephemeral knick-knacks that aren’t necessary for me to remember my doctors appointments etc.
That feeling of belonging, sense of community and popularity s one hell of a drug in and of itself.
Belonging and tribalism is a basic human drive, and we do really amazing and really strange things because of it…like spend thousands of dollars analogue tools because that makes NO sense. 😩
@@TrinaOGorman I also feel that it can, potentially, lead into a sort of passive aggressive behavior towards those that can afford the latest planner stack with the best paper, in the expensive/highly sought after covers with the exclusive fountain pen and ink combo that was ONLY available 3 ink-vent calendars ago that’s also a discontinued color collection.
I could go on a tangent about that on its own; it’s such a mess. As much as I want to stay out the way in regards to the planner obsession I can appreciate the realism of its innate toxicity and over consumption ‘appeal.’
@@AshaCattette Drama over absolutely nothing. My son called it “vacuous preoccupations.”
I really needed to hear this! I, too, teach writing, and I find myself frequently wondering why this community fosters this attitude. It was similar with bullet journaling; I came to the practice through the creator's 4 minute video, and when I went looking for answers to questions I had on TH-cam, I was inundated with notebooks that looked nothing like the bare and minimal original. I knew something was really wrong when women in bullet journal communities were talking about buying a new $20-30 notebook because they'd made a mistake on one page--and the community more often than not encouraged that behavior.
I had that compulsion in grad school. The anxiety had my perfection at an all-time high. They had me doing all kinds of behavior modification. I had to even try wearing a rubber band around my wrist and snapping it when I felt the urge! I would always have to have a backup Filofax calendar, in case I messed up a page. And I wasn’t decorating it. I was literally using it as a planner, but an appointment would get cancelled or I would misspell something and go crazy about it. Fun times. Therapy helped to some extent, self-awareness helped a lot. It was embarrassing to tell people what I was doing.
Well, Trina you have said it all. I got caught up in all that mess, but I can’t afford to let the stickers lay dormant. The companies know what they doing and have all type of gimmicks to ‘reel’ you in to spending your discretionary money on things you ‘think’ you need. I had to stop because I need my funds for other things that are more important to me. There are others that also offer goods to entice you to buy at their in-person journaling get together. Although it’s richly made, it’s not necessary. Thank you for your in-depth vlog about this subject matter. Had I known, I would have hundreds of dollars in my bank account now because I am also on a yarn diet.
You’re my internet Auntie Loren in my head. Did you know that? I don’t think you’re old enough to be my Mom.
Once again, a video of yours has struck a chord with me in a way that I didn't expect (and that's a good thing). After your video about trauma, this was a *great* follow-up. I truly fell into the "planner addict/obsessed" community on Insta. and even here on YT, especially with the Happy Planner community in late 2020/2021. The other day I estimated the amount I've spent on their sticker books: it's about $360...in less than 18 months!!! And on the planners themselves? It's probably close to an additional $300-$400. I LOVE what the brand stands for, and how decorative planning can be a form of creative expression. I am slowly backing away from that planning system, however. Because the level of burnout I was experiencing creating - as you said - the same thing over and over again - was making me NOT enjoy the process anymore. And I've *always* been a planner! I'm currently setting up my bullet journal for Q4, and the supplies I'm using all together total up to less than $10. It's something I can create ahead of time when there's long waits between calls while I'm working, and that I will set aside time for on the weekends to just do something creative that doesn't require too much forward-thinking. But I've been going through a lot of my notebooks to see what pages I can get rid of from them, and whatever is leftover I'm taking down to the lobby in my apartment building with a sticky note saying "Free! Please take what you want" and so far I've already gotten rid of 8 notebooks that I wasn't even using, or if I did I haven't used them for months. And while I've built a strong community with my own planning page over on IG (just over 900 followers), at the same time, that has also been a source of planning/creative burnout. I am so grateful to you and the community you have here, who all understand the constant battle that is involved with capitalism on so many levels within the notebook/journaling/planning communities. And I hope that this rant (if you made it all the way though and if you did, thank you!) makes some lick of sense, as it's almost midnight where I'm at and I have one more hour of work to go. Anyways, thank you for always being truthful and honest with us about your thoughts regarding this subject matter. Hope you're having a great week, Trina.
When I started my IG community years ago, we talked about hard stuff and we wrote about used stuff. Then I would be talking about hard stuff and someone would ask about my pen or my notebook, and I would be like WTF?
Then the sponsorships came and META started paying me monthly and it became about META and algorithms. 😫
This is so true.A real eye opener. I have been one to fall down the rabbit hole and needed a reality check like this to wake me up. Now I just need to crawl out. Thank you.
Self-awareness goes a long way, but modifying behavior is still hard because the compulsions can be strong. Mine are anyway.
This message will resonate with so many people, I'm a daily journalier and it has saved my life. I do purchase my journals (in bulk and on sale) from various stationary stores, and that's just a small part of the point, the satisfaction of putting my thoughts to paper provides such a profound release. As it can become an expensive hobby, I don't concern myself with the other's pretty. I have notebooks, journals, and plain printing paper as means of writing my thoughts but unfortunately, the market has turned something as a tool of therapy and productivity into a dysfunctional trend that doesn't yield any satisfaction to those who at their core don't understand what rabbit hole their going down. My hope is that people will see the potential for overall wellness through expression, whether it's pretty drawings or just words.
I hope people will see the potential for it as well. Though I fear that for many it will go the way of scrapbook. And, I guess that's okay. It is what it is. I hope those who truly need it will stick with it for all of the reasons that you and I know.
I truly appreciate your outspokenness, transparency, and honesty in this video.
I'm a lover of all things stationery, and I have a collection that has been stationary for literal years-I have an unused journal that was gifted to me on Christmas Day 2017. Almost 6 years ago! I'm sure I have pens with ink that has dried up.
I do agree that this need to have all the things, so to speak, stems from some form of trauma. With me, I'm afraid to be without and not have enough, which is why I haven't mustered up the courage to use anything in my collection because...what if I'll need it further down the line? It's quite frustrating, and it doesn't help the fact that I'm a perfectionist who's scared of potentially messing up one page. Yes, I'm the girl who would rip out pages because one singular page had too many mistakes. This is something I'm trying to truly understand and combat because it has been affecting all other parts of my life, including the relationships that I have with loved ones. And I'm only 25. 😔
I'm on a quest to minimize and simplify all of my planning and journaling systems, and this video is just what I need to give me the motivation to make it happen.
Again, thank you so much for expressing your stance on this matter. Few people speak on it, but I'm glad you did candidly. 💜
For me, it stems from trauma. So much of what you experience WAS me. When I was in grad school, I had to go to the university counseling center because I’d gotten to the point of having to replace my entire Filofax page if I made a mistake. So, I’d have to have multiple calendars to replace messed up pages. It was CRAZY. The sensation I would get was physical. It was a compulsion. And it’s not like it’s gone. I still “feel” it, but self-awareness and my responsibilities to my sons and students help. I get it.
I am one of those color coding, sticker using planner people. I use planners (digital and analog) to manage my ADHD and colorful messy spreads allow me to somewhat function. I don't know if it is a trauma response, but I get very anxious about losing and or forgetting things.
Since I color in my Gantt charts at work, it is something that has to be fast. It gives me a visual reference for my daily and weekly tasks.
My problem is that I want to have separate planners so I have the things, but I don't actually have the time to use more than 2 at a time.
By the way, I have to get to the post office to buy stamps in order to mail you a check for the Smythson notebooks. I think I am going to use them for creative research.
@@planningandpowerlifting I thin color coding is great. I have a very productive friend who uses color-coding. She explained it to me, and it was so impressive. She uses dots to categorize things. It’s so smart. I’m going to use dots for that same purpose. And, I love a good sticker, especially a cuss-y one. You don’t have to pay for the notebooks! They would have just sat here, unused. Now they’ll be used. A win.
THANK YOU! I appreciate this message dearly. As someone who just writes on pages to clear my head it is not a bunch of stickers or drawings that I need. I have come to see lately that EVERYTHING is about selling something to other people so one person or a couple people can make big bucks. The s**t has come to irk me so much.
I hear you. ❤️
Every so often, I just feel overwhelmed by my stationery supplies, and then I do a massive declutter.
Do you sell or give things away?
@@TrinaOGorman I give them away… friends, family, local schools, or Goodwill.
If you are in the midst of a declutter right now, Starbucks has been doing a school supply drive near me. I wonder if your local shops have the same going on?
Just discovered your channel today as I’ve been researching the very same phenomena and you nailed a lot of the talking points I’ve been exploring in my own journal. Things reached a head for me today because I discovered a post in a subreddit in which someone was lamenting spending $500 just this year on planners, realized that paper planners “don’t work” for her, but then she went and bought another one anyways?! I couldn’t believe how many comments were essentially enabling this behavior. It was…bizarre and utterly baffling. Or the way people post photos of shelves full of unused notebooks and planners and simply laugh about their behavior, as if it were just a quirky personality trait. This video was a breath of fresh air.
I just found this today and had to subscribe! Your comment summed up my feelings so well!🙌🏾❤️ this video spoke to my writer/planner soul and I’m committing to doing better!
I was into notebooks because I'm a math tutor and I felt like it was easier for me to solve math problems on a notebook rather than straight to digital (I do have a pen tablet for writing on my pc). I just really needed a frixion pen to go with it because I needed to erase stuff. I stumbled into the world of stationery through Jetpens and before I knew it, I was overbuying blank/nonlined notebooks and ballpens and other stuff I didn't really need. It was the aesthetics and the kind of lifestyle the stationery community was showing, that influenced me. That said, I really appreciate your videos because it's really overconsumption. I also appreciate your journey from one notebook to the next; you really do get it. Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this!
This video speaks everything I’ve been thinking for probably the last 5 years. You’re right - it’s all capitalist bullsh*t. The stickers and Etsy shops and planner blogs and sponsored TH-cam channels and selling selling selling is completely out of control. My favorite notebooks right now are super cheap spiral notebooks and marble composition books from the dollar store, drugstore, grocery store, etc. I use cheap Bic ballpoints and dollar store highlighters, sticky notes, and the occasional dollar store or Daiso sticker. I’m going to be selling or donating all my expensive planners. I already donated 99% of my huge stationery accessories collection to Goodwill.
And I have to use just one notebook at a time.
Thank you for this video. It has made me not feel crazy. I know notebooks are personal but sometimes I think the sheer volume of “sameness” just drowns out everything else till your eyes can no longer accept anything else. One of the reasons I just stopped looking at journals on Pinterest.
It has totally clouded what writing in a book is about. Hurts my heart.
the sameness destroys any sense of creativity that I have. I completely agree. I need to accept that my messy crappy handwriting is FINE and I don't need to make my stuff look like other people's. I started writing a book this year and immediately had to make my stuff look like the author on youtube. didn't even realize it until i got there. was it useful, yes useful things and i have used them but honestly I don't actually need them.
The sameness is mind boggling and numbing. The Flip-thrus. I’ve done them. But I actually had to censor what I was putting in my own notebook. That was crazy.
Yes! I feel this so much. At one point, I was making things I legitimately felt were creative, different and outside the box from a monthly planner kit. It took months to realize I wasn’t doing it because I wanted to make things; I was doing it because I hoped to get noticed and make the design team and on and on… Why?! I wanted some sort of validation but could never get noticed among the sea of sameness. That all sounds so silly now.
@@TrinaOGorman YES! I don't want to censor myself.
@@cherylashworth1124 Absolutely, I have had the desire to get noticed before too. I was doing instagram planner accounts before 2019 and now it all seems so useless. It didn't benefit me, really it caused me to just compare myself to other people and then buy too many things.
There is so much truth in this video. As a society i think consumerism is at an all time high, but its completely out of control. I didnt even know there was a planner community until 2020. Before that i used a simple spiral notebook for lists and a cheap bound book to journal in. In 2020 with everything shut down i decided i wanted to focus on my health and decided to look at youtube. One video after another about health planners and i was lost down the rabbit hole. Then i needed a budget planner. Then for no reason at all i needed a daily planner/journal. 3 years later i have spent thousands of dollars on stickers, washi, notebooks, planners, leather folios and TNs... and the list goes on and on. Recently ive realized more of what i actually need and want and what works and what doesnt. Ive also become more environmentally aware of using paper sources that are sustainable. It was just eye opening to me. Also life changes... we are currently going through some emotionally exhausting stuff and i cant be bothered keeping up with the cool kids right now. I genuinely wish i wouldnt have been influenced so much, but its their job right?!?! I appreciate your thoughts on this situation as well. Nice to know others feel like this too.
These are indeed emotionally times. I’m so tired. I don’t have time for mindlessness. It freaks me out that so many people seem to be sleeping or distracted. But what can I do? 😩
Yes! This! I feel much the same way that you do. I don't have time to make my planners or journals look cute and pretty. I have time to jot down a to do list, shopping list, appointments, etc. That's really it. I need functionality. Stickers, pretty paper and drawings don't give me that. I could probably make time for that if i wanted to, but then I'd get behind on things that matter in my home like laundry, so we can have clean clothes to wear, making dinner, etc.
I started a diary when I was probably about 15 years old, using a spiral notebook because it's what I had. For me it was therapeutic. It was cathartic. It still is. I don't decorate the pages of my diaries/journals, because I feel like that would take away from the time I have to actually write, and decorating the pages of my journals is not therapeutic. At least not for me. At least not in the same way that getting thoughts out of my head, and being able to process those thoughts and feelings. I've experienced trauma, I was bullied in elementary school, and was all but shunned by the "popular" kids in junior high and high school, because I didn't fit in (we were the only Iranian/Persian kids in school). I also come from a very dysfunctional family, with narcissistic siblings, and I needed a place to vent my frustrations and say the things I wasn't free to say out loud.
Thirty plus years on, I still keep a diary/journal. It's still therapeutic and cathartic for me. Life hasn't always been sunshine and rainbows for me, so writing is a necessity for me. Friends and family started buying me some of the most beautiful journals I own for my birthday and Christmas, because they know what it means to me to have a place for my thoughts to go, so I have a bit of a stash. Pens too. Some could say it borderlines on "obsession", but they all have a purpose. I gave up caring what others think a long time ago.
Maybe one day I'll have the kind of time those ladies have to create beautiful journals for absolutely no reason. 😉
I am sorry that anyone experiences trauma or gets bullied for anyone reason. As an educator and as a human being who experienced childhood trauma, I hear you. Writing was and still is so empowering. And yes, you can do it in ANYTHING.
I don't know if I ever want nothing better to do than that (LOL), but we each get to decide how we spend out time. It's the envy that I want to intercept, if I can. I want this somehow to reach the young kids, who were like us, who just need a notebook and pen. Who maybe can't even afford that other stuff.
I really appreciate you bringing this as a discussion point! I think it's important to consider different economic statuses and everyone's situations/priorities are different. I have a few videos/"hauls/unboxing" that I've gone back and forth on editing/uploading because while I do enjoying watching haul videos, I don't want to contribute to the pressures of "Must Have" and make it seem like it's normal to spend spend spend without a care in the world as you said or add to the "keep up with the Jones'" atmosphere. The items I purchase I save extensively for and think about purchasing for a long time (weeks/months/years in some cases). Maybe someday I will still post them, but if so I'd like to also do so with a message of conscious and slow consumerism.
I have to ask myself what the purpose is and why we have the compulsion to do “show and tell.” When I taught high school, I had some kids who lived in homeless shelters. “Show and tell” was a rather middle class endeavor.
Thank you for stripping the superficial and revealing the true beauty of why we write ❤
I love the process.
I’m working my way through your videos and I have to say that you are SUCH a breath of fresh air. I took a good look at these communities that I’ve spent so much money and time trying to be a part of, I looked at the demographics of the creators and the followers… and they’re not me. Why did I do all that to try to fit in with people who are not like me? I’m going to watch this video a few times over, but suffice to say, I’m breaking up with these groups. I even changed my username and photo so that people wouldn’t recognize me. Thank you, Trina.
Also as an Asian American woman (Filipino), I’ll speak on the Asian creators and call them out too. A lot of the Asian creators in this community align themselves with white people by showing off their stationery collections and co-opting the same habits of their white counterparts (things that you mentioned in the video). It’s a bit disheartening, when I see it’s done ONLY for their own image. I get it when it’s done in earnest. But A LOT of these creators are only doing it for their own image and revenue. Okay rant over, I’ll transcribe this into my journal lol.
I honestly didn’t think my “rants” would resonate with so many people, and I’m still trying to process that.
The energy that a big part of the “journaling and planning communities” is about showing off what you have or even showing off what you’ve written or drawn, and getting likes and attention.
And writing was something that empowered me and gave me voice and courage, at times when I felt so low. I’m so happy that I didn’t have this to contend with that time. It would have made me feel lost once again.
I haven’t even watched yet and I’ve liked just about every comment. I already know I’m on board with you here, as a work-in-progress mostly reformed planner “addict”. (That term is gross; how did we get here?! 🤦🏼♀️)
I’ve lost count of how many fancy, hand-made TNs I had, how many I gifted to teachers, friends, etc. I got more enjoyment from leaving half a dozen (set-up and decorated and all) in the staff room at my last job than I had from looking at them on a shelf. I felt lighter and less guilty once those were gone. Once those notebooks I had lovingly decorated were out in the world being used, I felt better! At least the money I had spent was useful to someone.
Does that make the excess and the over-buying okay? Completely not. I don’t remember realizing I had zoned out and passed enough is enough and landed all the way in too much is too much. But I did. I know I did.
I started with good intentions; I’m a scrapbooker and planning allowed me a little mini-scrapbook time. I could feel creative when I didn’t have the time for a full page or project. Great! And that’s what I’ve finally come back to. Because I do like stickers and washi and I already have that stuff! I just don’t need my planner to look like anyone else’s anymore, I don’t need my planner to be on Insta anymore and I sure as h*ll don’t need more than one anymore.
Sorry for the essay. Clearly I have thoughts. Thank you for this space and the conversation.
As a college writing professor, no one every has to apologize for writing lengthy response to me. I welcome writing. Writing is organized thinking and it is my favorite thing in the world. ❤️
HI Trina, thanks a lot for sharing all these. you know what, you stopped me paying another planner almost 400 euros in my chart. and tonight I met you, I quit the chart, and begin thinking about what I have about journaling, I am not in any community of journaling, but I am addicted, like feeing of touching the leather cover, want to try every size of cover, etc. I won't stop myself using planners, I begin to think how to use them correctly and to make me happy but not stress. thanks you again.
Oh wow! I am so happy that this video is still helpful to people. I've been where you are, and it is so liberating to not be there. To use the notebook that I have without wanting another one all of the time. For me, the compulsion was often driven by stress.
Yes, the STRESS is the biggest enemy in this game! Good day Trina, I am looking forward more videos from you !
You are priceless. Thank you for this. Your words and your clear emotion combine to be that beacon. Thank you.
I upset people by not staying in the box. But we can’t all stay in the box. Thanks for your support. ❤️
@@TrinaOGorman We sure can’t and I commend you.
I’ve just come across your channel, your videos and your outlook on everything is wonderful to hear. I got into journaling during a really rough, traumatic period in my life, and planning helped me to organize my days and journaling to helped me to organize and release my thoughts and feelings. Over the last few years though I’ve been getting sucked into the consumerism side of it. I’m disappointed in myself, I didn’t even see it coming, and I even work in marketing haha! I’ve now gotten to a point where I’ve sold off a lot of my planner covers, and now I have (and consistently use!) an A5 TN for various “book projects”, a pocket sized moterm planner for daily planning in which I use up unfinished old notebooks by chopping down the paper, and I have an A5 journal/commonplace notebook where everything else goes. I’m seeing the light in the simplicity and actually using my stuff now rather than being overwhelmed by it all. Thank you for a wonderfully honest, insightful and articulate video.
P.S. Cahier is French for notebook and is pronounced cah-yay 😊
Have a wonderful day
Cah-yay????? OMG, thank you so much. Using my stuff is making me feel like the responsible person that I’m trying to teach my own sons to be. And same, simplicity is how my life was pre-social media and that is where I have returned.
Thanks for the correct pronunciation tip!
Yes, with a hard C/K ! Thanks again for a wonderful video, I've been gradually getting through your back catalogue 😊
I wrote a similar journal entry about how people, including myself, tend to place form over substance when journaling and planning. The topic reminds me of the scene in Thor: Ragnarok where Odin tells Thor that mjolnir is simply a tool and not the source of his power. Journaling and planning are not powerful because of the tools we use, it's powerful due to the ritual of sitting down to connect with ourselves. The greater the emphasis on the tools, the further we can stray from the goal of connecting with ourselves. Granted, I think it's possible to have nice things and use journaling/planning as a creative outlet while achieving the goal of connecting with ourselves. However, I prefer to keep things simple by lowering the bar to entry, and to spend more time on tasks that matter. I tend to share your sentiment in many respects.
Hi Mike,
I feel like I'm emerging from a fog since my Dad died. For a while, all I could do was click a thumbs up when comments came in. Thank you for making this analogy. I'm not at all familiar with the scene in Thor:Ragnarok, but the analogy is perfect. Thank you for sharing that insight.
This video!❤ This topic is like the big elephant in the room that nobody ever acknowledges or talks about! Thank you for making this video. This year has been a year of growth for me in relation to this specific topic. One day I looked around my “area” at all the stuff! 😳I realized I fell victim to this trap…it’s so easy to do! But it was like a wake up call that day. Why do I have all this stuff, notebooks, pens, etc. Some I will probably never use…time I realistically don’t have to use it….and why? Because I seen someone on social media say that it was good and a must have? So this year I have been making it a practice to really use what I have…to shop my own stash….and honestly, to cut back on social media in any form and be intentional in only exposing myself to things that will help me grow as a person in some form. Hence why I am here, you make me grow…specifically my mind. I have loved your videos and posts since day one. And your Mind Mosaic…well after that it was a wrap for me..I was all in for every video or post. I love that you share your thoughts and you don’t shy away in fear of going against the popular opinion. “And don’t piss me off” 😂 I just love and appreciate who you are so much!
But! The real question is….what are we going to do about it? Now that the problem is out there….how can we stop being part of the problem and instead be part of something that feels more like a solution instead? To start…I would like to see you continue to grow the community you have already started….because that’s what I feel like your channel is! It’s own beautiful community. I for sure would love more writing guidance type of videos….as many prompts as you can give….heck, I would even pay to take a writing class if you created one. I am excited to see where you will go with your Substack as well as I just found that wonderful space of yours. Now for myself….what to do with all the unused stuff?? It will be so freeing to let some of it go. Although not as expensive as some of the stuff on your video…still expensive for my budget and sadly unused. I wish there was a good place to take it and donate it where someone will get good use of it. I am going to have to research ideas. Any thoughts? I once knew a lady who created beautiful journals with all the bits and bobs decorations in them and she would take them somewhere to donate to inspire people to write. 🤔 Anyways, keep giving us more videos! I am here for them all. Thanks for being you and sharing this. ❤
I’m looking into seeing if I can teaching journaling at a women’s prison or at a shelter. I would love that. I love giving journals to students and friends. So, I’ve also been giving a lot of things away, now that I’m intentionally decluttering. Do you follow me on IG? If so, what’s your @? I would love to talk to you more. You have great ideas about “what next!”
@@TrinaOGorman hello, I would love to discuss the “What’s Next?” topic with you, but unfortunately I haven’t used IG in a long time. It was part of my social media decluttering , lol. I don’t even know if I can get back into my IG account it’s been so long. I just felt that TH-cam was better as far as what I am exposing myself to…more genuine and less about orchestrated picture perfect posts…Not saying that is referring to you, or that everyone’s pages were that way…there are good genuine pages out there, but TH-cam just offered something more that was fitting for me at the time.
How about email or a Zoom meeting?
Can we have a difference in opinion without my comment being deleted? I sure hope so. I found this video very interesting. I have to honestly say that there is so much about this video that I wholeheartedly do not agree with; but I believe your interpretations and opinions are very valid. It is interesting how people tend to interpret things differently. Like you I have been writing my whole life, but unlike you I did it for the fun of it and for the enjoyment of writing. I didn’t use it as a form of therapy or to write through any trauma. I believe that writing and journaling for the fun of it is just a valid a reason as writing for mental health. So in an effort to play devil’s advocate I would say that the women with the beautiful manicured nails may be journaling because they think it is fun. I have been watching journaling videos on TH-cam for at least ten years and I have seen a wide variety of different types of journaling and different types of women doing the journaling; it’s there if you look for it. Also as far as “influencing” is concerned, no one can make you buy anything. A person’s purchase choice is a decision all their own. It’s about being a follower or a leader. As someone who is a leader I have never bought anything just because I saw someone else with it, unless I knew that I had a true purpose for it; I’m way too fugal for that. I agree there are a lot of planner girls out there who give in to FOMO. They have whole videos about their planner hopping, planner anxiety and the sheer overwhelm of having too much; those are the ones I don’t watch. Variety is the spice of life, how boring would my writing life be if I were to just use the same notebook and pen for the rest of my life. No thank you. Writing is my hobby, not my therapy. I am also a single mom of a developmentally disabled child and I still find the time to write every day on my downtime. Sometimes I use washi tape and stickers, sometimes I use a $2 gel pen, sometimes I use a $50 fountain pen; sometimes I make pretty pages for two hours and sometimes I just use a black pen and words only and I refuse to feel bad about that. We all have the same 24 hours in the day and what we choose to do with that time is completely that person’s prerogative. Some people spend $5 on a notebook and some spend $500 and once again their prerogative. It is no one else’s business what others do with their money and their time and certainly not their notebooks.
I’m not debating my position on this. It’s my position on what I see. I’ve already explained that. No one has to justify their choices to me and no one has to agree with me.
@@TrinaOGormanYou are completely correct. I meant to put a differing opinion instead of debate. Why would you need to debate what you already said.
@kailahmom1 Believe me, I’ve done all sorts of research and have heard other positions on this. Everything that I’ve said in this video are positions that I hold based on everything that I know. Furthermore, the testimonials of people who are actually suffering and struggling because of the toxicity of these environments and the unhealthy behaviors that are encouraged and supported only serve as further evidence. My position will not be shared by everyone. But some people need a different kind of energy and a different kind of community and would like to climb out of the rabbit holes they climbed down. If that is not you, then I am happy you are at peace with your decisions and I do hope they continue to serve you well.
I agree with a lot of sentiments in your video. just a quick note about what you said about men - i think men aren't involved in hobbies like this (generally! there's always exceptions) because usually the mental load falls to women. I know that's the case in my household, and my mom's, and on and on. However that's definitely not an excuse for the mess that is the planner community, lol. I totally agree, the planner community has turned into a consumerist pit. and regarding what you said about the 'end goal', I think the end goal is... clout, success, money, sponsorships, brand deals, partnerships with brands, etc. And that feels really vapid and ... sycophantic.
I think that men and women have different stressors. I’ve not met a man who didn’t have a mental load. I’ve met men, whose wives are taken care of and basically do nothing but shop and sleep, so I think we might know different people. I think women, who have been disenfranchised, tend to also diminish men, who benefit from a system that they also suffer in. I don’t know a lot of men who don’t work hard, aren’t actively engaged with their families, so I don’t know…
I used to think women were more mature than men, but I see so many who complain about “adulting” that I don’t even know anymore. ☹️😩
I admit I felt a tiny bit defensive when I started watching, but you explained it so well and it makes a lot of sense! I love the show and tell with your own belongings, and your comments about geniuses’ diaries from the past were so inspiring.
I’m SO glad that you admitted feeling defensive, but stayed to listen and understood what I was saying. This is so important to me because this position can be difficult to hear, because it’s not the popular one, and seven years ago I would have been defensive too. ❤️
You're very right that addiction can present itself in very different way and you bring out a very valid point that addiction should never be dismissed even though it's very well hidden. But drugs, alcohol, coffee, shopping, stealing, planning,etc. are not addictive. Some people are just more prone to addiction than others. Addiction is just a way to cope that is hurtful on the long therm. Our relationship with things can be toxic but it doesn't mean that those things are the devil. Nevertheless I agree that you should always be on the lookout for addiction because all those things can be symptoms of addiction. That's just my opinion if you think that you or someone you know is an addict it's better to address your concerns to a professional.
Things like notebooks are tools. The obsession is another story.
I love the point about the composition notebooks too! I have my unused/partially used notebooks on a shelf and the composition notebooks sit there proudly with the others. I prefer A5 for my meeting notebooks for portability purposes but composition notebooks are great for classes and research.
Composition books will always be great.
I’m watching this ten months later and whilst I do agree with you about some content, I’ve been really heartened by the number of middle aged and /or neurodivergent women who talk about real life: money, jobs, or lack, chronic conditions, mental health and so on. This seems to have changed recently.
This is actually great to hear. I don’t watch too much TH-cam, and at that time the algorithm was suggesting a lot of haul and notebook set-up videos to me. But more recently, probably also based on a change in my search history, I’ve been watching much more helpful and serious-minded content as well.
This is a great point and I think I’ll make follow-up video. I don’t know if I should remove older content or leave it. I’ll have to sort that out, but that you for your helpful insight.
@@TrinaOGorman I think a follow up would be a good idea, it’s an interesting and important topic. I think there’s definitely a corner of Planner TH-cam that’s a lot more real now, possibly bc of the pandemic and the current economic and political situation. Escapism can be soothing, but if it’s unattainable due to cost or ability, it can feel distressing.
Thank you. ✨
“We but mirror the world. All the tendencies present in the outer world are to be found in the world of our body. If we could change ourselves, the tendencies in the world would also change. As a man changes his own nature, so does the attitude of the world change towards him. This is the divine mystery supreme. A wonderful thing it is and the source of our happiness. We need not wait to see what others do.”
~ Mahatma Gandhi
I am interested in joining exactly the type of community you describe - I need a community who isn't afraid to talk about what is really going on.
Everyone’s afraid of angering the algorithm. Of not getting “likes.”
Everyone has their own priorities and backgrounds.
There are ppl who don't have the parents that pay them their university or college and there are also students who need longer to end their university what also causes higher debts.
To me journaling has become kind of an escape from my full time job full of data, numbers, etc. 😵💫
I have so many notebooks I haven’t used it’s sad.
Same.
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽Thank You !!!! 1000% spot on.
You are so welcome I am glad that it resonated with you and others. I appreciate the feedback so much.
I agree.
I feel like we are sisters 💗
❤️ I’m assuming this resonated then, and you’re not one of the folks I tend to kiss off.
@@TrinaOGorman yes! I have felt similarly for a while now. People are flinging around words like obsessed and addicted, and painting over-planning like it is something to be desired. I feel it can sometimes be a response to trauma. I don't want to criticize someone else's hobby or interest, but the whole "planner culture" I see on TH-cam is disturbing to me. Are those people doing and buying and obsessing because they want to, or are they being hoodwinked by an industry? I don't know
@Higgler16 Some are obsessing because they want to and others have been bought. I wholeheartedly agree that some of this is a response to trauma. I also think that for women, a lot of it is the same energy I see in middle school girls - a way of establishing clout in ways that are actually meaningless because they otherwise would feel that they were without clout or purpose. It seems to be what happens in the middle school cafeteria happening online, but with adult women.
And the thing is, I GET IT. Do you see all of the shit I have? I'm not even trying to hide the fact that I have THOUSANDS of dollars worth of merchandise. But when is it enough?
😶
PS I played this on 1.5x speed because you talk reaaallly slooow…. 😄