The clothes analogy is so important. When we wear something that we don't care for and we think "no one's going to see it anyway", I think we indirectly imply two things: that we are no one and that we don't care about our opinion of ourselves which further puts us down. It's all connected, our inner affects our outer world and the outer world affects our inner world which is why we tend to spiral downwards and things compound as the cycle perpetuates itself. I hope I'm making sense, might make a video to clarify
What you wrote makes sense to me. I think your excellent and yet easy-to-understand analogy of wearing clothes others don't care lead to a negative spiral of feeling an unworthy self that matters to no one including to own self. Thanks for expressing your awareness based on Lana's this video.
@@ZED2.0 We all share that concern. But Lana's Ro community on this page is so good at inviting us to express ourselves and recognize each other. Looking forward to hearing how your insight further develops!
@@ZED2.0 Spot on analogy and pattern of effect pathway analogy. As far as bring apologetic for feeling as if you are rambling... this is something I too do all the time as well. I have confirmed over and over that I am simply noting the barriers to the majorities limitations to interpretation and moreso even to their attention span as well as my own hardship at summarizing/ maintaining others attention this way when I think and weigh every detail as learned best practice... Now I am feeling like I am rambling, 😆... We know we are solid at best in current thinking by considering all the variables we have to work with and utilizing the many tools/abilities gained over the years through circumstance and seeking understanding and solution. Expansive thinking simplified but also given the expanded pathways that led to current conclusions represents a point of full strength. Well that is my goal and current realization. Work in progress.
The "don't be a brick collector" is so important because I think I plan too much to get the circumstances perfect that I end up not doing it. The core reason might be I'm scared of those change so that I think about it too much as a form of a procrastination.
I personally think reading fiction feeds our inner child. There is something about being in another world, a sense of wonder. There are usually hidden lessons and ideas within the plots and characters that I believe we are meant to learn from! Great video, Lana 💌
I actually think fiction books can teach us things that self-help or non-fiction can't. And they also help us to see life through someone else's lens. I prefer a balance between the two. For instance, my goal is to read atleast one non-fiction and one fiction book per week. Anyway, loved the video! I really liked the brick collecting part. I think it'll be kind of like a motivation to me. Thank you, Lana.
Don't be too hard on yourself if you can't read 2 books in a week. As long as you're reading and enjoy reading, that's all that matters. I'm only saying this because I personally can't read 2 books a week due to work and studies, despite me craving to read the books I got for Christmas and wanting to finish them ASAP and ending up feeling bad if i hadn't read something after an entire day Tldr dont be so frigid with the week long time constraint! Read whenever you can and if you enjoy it and it works for you, keep doing it
@@avoatlaw I really appreciate your advice, thank you! And oh yes, I definitely keep that in mind. I just keep a goal for myself and then I try to achieve it, but again, I don't beat myself up for not reading regularly. I don't want reading to become a chore. Sometimes, I do feel bad for not reading, but now, I try to not be so hard on myself. Because being a student and then managing all your tasks is hard. I'll definitely keep your words in mind, thanks a lot!
totally agree! I love reading fiction, it helps me de-stress and also a good book is one of the best things ever, for me anyway. I can enjoy non fiction but most of the time fiction is what I like.
I feel so called out by the "no one is going to see it" so you don't bother- I feel like this has been me throughout covid/lockdown and has really affected the way I feel about myself! I also love the term "brick collector", it reminds me of what James Clear says about being in motion (ie planning) vs being in action and how being in motion for too long makes you feel like you're being in productive so you procrastinate on action. Great video :)
This video literally made me cry - I always deprive myself of those small joys like buying new skincare products or trying a new recipe because I categorised those things as unimportant. Thank you for the reminder that's important to give ourselves nice things.
I think that clothes can be important :) and I'm telling this from 31 year old guy perspective who always thought: "i don't care about clothes too much", "those who improve their mood by shopping are just weak people". But then i discovered that ie. after having a new haircut (at hairdresser), i feel more confident, i feel more attractive, and as a result I have better mood. I don't like spending too much money on clothes but i can't deny that this winter i bought fantastic shoes, i get a lot of compliments, and as a result, I can say that it was a good decision, and at least few times, such ridiculous thing as shoes, actually, improved my happiness. Also, I learnt that if I like something, not necessary deep, important (like buying shoes as an example), then it doesn't make me a weak, or shallow person. I still have same hobbies, same values as before.
Depression is so powerful it transforms us silently to humans we're not proud of physically and mentally, it transforms us slowly until we hit rock bottom we don't see anything coming, it takes a comment/stare from others to wake us up, whoever is reading this, I wish you lot of strength for this 2022 !!! This video made me cry a little bit....I relate to you in each minute of this video, the change is now for our well being !! 💪🏼
Ultimately it doesn't matter where you are right now, or where you will ever be. What matters is your trajectory. So every day, ask yourself "are you better today, than you were yesterday?" And like Lana says, it's not about 5am cold showers, but doing things that genuinely increase your mood and happiness.
Have you ever thought about writing a book? The way you tell stories, the way you speak, you’re so artistic. You seriously fascinate me and I’d 100% read your book
someone told me to read an educational book once a month and for me who reads fiction books all my life, it's difficult to find it enjoyable so i put in my to-do-list. when i started reading the book that she recommended for the month, it didn't feel right. i can't understand anything and the informations aren't staying in my brain. I have this mindset that when you read educational books, you have to remember it; you have to learn from it and for me who has really high standards for learning, it just wasn't for me. then i realized that i shouldn't put reading a book in my to-do-list. i never realized the meaning of "doing something at your own pace" until someone told me to read a non fiction book once a month. i realized that reading book for me is my life of emotions. i read books to feel good. i read books to feel sad. but that to-do-list made me read books as a responsibility. and it's also the same with learning. i learn for fun. i learn the things i'm interested in. and reading educational books with a sense of responsibility took away the "fun". all my life, I've always wanted to have the "perfect life", i do what most people do and find the fun in there but last year i realized that living for myself is much more important and being happy with the things i have. goals make me intimidated. the responsibility behind the goals that i have to achieve in a certain amount of time scares me. so i just started living my life in the present moment. although, maybe it's not healthy as for other people's idealism, it makes me happy and i find it fun.
Good discussion question at the end...Fantasy/fiction has taught me more about my life than most of the self help stuff out there. Harry Potter taught me that I cannot live my life in fear and that if im going to make that happen, i cannot simply go with the flow of society...I have to find the courage, maybe break some rules.... That's what Harry does throughout the entire series. I found the courage to start my own yt channel, something i wanted to do for a long time.
I've spent the new year in the cardiac intensive care unit with unexplained heart failure. Lots of tests; lots of unanswered questions; lots of scary possibilities for a young, otherwise healthy distance runner. So I've been looking forward to these posts even more than usual-as something to punctuate the monotony with something pleasant rather than anxiety-inducing. Listening to a calming voice just now has helped to soothe my nerves and provide some comfort and even hope at a difficult time. Thank you.
Dear Lana: I find it rather confusing that so many "liked" comments are for comments with zero substance or positivity (see: "First") whereas comments that are consistently positive and supportive such as from individuals as above are often ignored. I'm obviously not condemning you for such things, as I know absolutely nothing of your life, yet I would suggest that those who put more thought, care, and time into their outward support to you deserve more time than the ones who put little to no thought, effort, or time towards you. I find this very confusing, especially considering the content posted on your pages. I hope to only be constructive and supporting in this comment - not just supporting you, but those who do put the genuine time and sincere effort to reach out to you and try to support you through this incredibly limited medium that is TH-cam. Keep up the good, everyone.
@@Zigg317 I'm not sure what you're talking about. I think the comments section on Lana's videos may be the most civilised and profound on TH-cam that I've ever seen.
@@Vivi_9 Hi Vivi; What I’m getting at is that Lana replies to or likes most commonly only the comments that are a sentence fragment or very superficial, rather than the comments like above or the others that have substance. Yes, those who do comment seem more eloquent than other sites, but that’s not the issue or topic of debate, rather the effort to recognize and promote those comments doesn’t seem to be there.
@@Zigg317 dude, content creators don't have time to read every comment, and even if they did they wouldn't respond to every one. Comments don't need promoting and you should never expect a response just for writing one.
A while back I learned from the Buddha something called Impermanence. This has changed my life completely and now I take all the changes in my life with open arms. It was so life changing that I’ve even made a video speaking a about this. Thanks for sharing Lana ❤️ - Migue
I've been needing a change for a while now and this was definitely eye opening. I love your idea of not being a brick collector specifically for things like exercising. We're used to the idea of someone in workout clothes at the ideal time of day in the ideal setting through social media and that doesn't need to be the case for us to get moving and that applies for any aspect of life. Thank you for this video Lana, it's a powerful one.
Yes, agreed. I've always told myself I can't do whatever things because it needed to be perfect and that just added so much anxiety and stress on myself.
I used to only read educational books because they offer structural tips, but later on I realize my system of learning and life through practice. I started reading Harry Potter because my niece asked me to read to her. It’s very inspiring fiction just learning how the author use her imagination fly through the lens of a child and other different roles. The vivid description of Harry Potter inspires me to speak out my mind in a more descriptive way and helps me how to engage with listeners, viewers and readers through language.
Hooked on this channel. This woman is very intelligent. Don't see my comments as rude just male perspective on the subject. I turned off TV now for 2 years and very happy and learning about other people perspectives very rewarding. I am a veiled birth and Aquarius
Beautiful talk Lana.💕 Doing new activities helps in getting out of the slump. New things always give us a surge of energy. To everyone reading my comment, God is watching over you and everything will be okay.💕
You learn from fiction in a very different way. Educational books usually tell you things. Good fiction indirectly invites you to think about questions you may have not thought about. Flowers for Algernon made me think about my own struggle to find friends. Nothing by Janne Teller made me think more about the point of life in a gripping way. But if fiction does none of that just makes me giggle, or makes me feel strong emotions, I consider that a success.
Im also exploring what I can do 'just for fun' and not always having to be productive or even learning. But also not like watching Netflix shows endlessly...
I don't normally comment on videos so this is new for me. I've been watching your channel for about three years now I think, I really enjoy your content and it's helped me a lot throughout my journey. I find your content to be very thought-provoking, inspiring, and motivational. I have had the opposite for me where I have in the past read a lot of fiction, romance and fantasy mostly. I have in about the past 5 or 6 months been reading more and more self-help books, I have learned and have grown so much, it's crazy to look back on everything I have been through and have overcome. I have found a balance where I read a healthy amount of fiction and non-fiction alike where I continue to learn and grow from both. I only follow what makes me feel good and continues to add value to my life and I hope that you continue to do the same for yourself. You continue to inspire me and your work adds so much value to my life and the life of others.
Reading fiction is inspiring for me. Healing. Is seeing people make mistakes, try their best, move, get stuck. I don't know how to explain it... but I learn. I heal.
You're a beautiful human being, your heart and soul are full of golden purity. Thank you for sharing your brilliant self with the world. Everything has the capacity to edify.💎♾️
I resonated so much with that brick collecting analogy I feel like I’ve been collecting bricks for years now and it’s become so heavy that it’s hard to move all at once…this video feels like a great reminder that I don’t have to suddenly wake up one day and decide I’m gonna throw all the bricks away magically it’s gonna take time and I have to allow myself that time instead of being in a rush to get somewhere I think I’m supposed to be going.
As a fellow INFJ, I can relate to this especially last year where I felt really stuck in a rut. But since the new year has come, I told myself that I need to let go of the things that's slowing me down. I don't know if it's just in the mindset and having a sense of fresh start, but these past few days have been really productive to me. Started to take care of myself again plus now I'm approaching things with a beginner's mindset and it made a lot of difference. I know real change takes time and I have a long way to go but I'm just really glad that there's progress this time. Thank you again Lana for the Notion tutorial, now I get to track my progress via the self nurturing page. :)
In terms of fiction books and even to some respects TV and movies, I think they immerse you into a new experience, expand your imagination which can then inspire you in a totally different way. Kind of like when you walk into a museum and you see paintings that an artist created a few hundred years ago and you stand in awe that another human being had the capacity to create something so amazing.
*20 Life-Tips I wish I Knew In My 20s:* 1. Marry the right one 2. Don't Lie, ever 3. Learn to be Brave 4. Learn to Say No 5. Be curious about everything (ask questions) 6. Develop a Code and Live By It 7. Be Patient with Yourself (but put in the work) 8. Learn to Listen 9. Avoid Debt (big one! if you want to make some moolah!) 10. Seek out a Mentor 11. Develop a Space to Confined In and Ask Questions 12. Be Kind, Be Compassionate 13. World changes constantly, keep an open mind 14. Stop Nail-biting & nail-picking habit 15. No dirty websites 16. Read more (it’s actually really good for you - makes you more intelligent) 17. Limited time for gaming 18. Not drinking too much 19. No drugs 20. Enjoy life, smile Take it easy and I hope you found one thing helpful in this list
As a person who reads mostly fiction, I learned more things and lessons from fiction books and it helped me be more imaginative and creative which lead me to putting things into action too
Thanks for this Lana ❤ It's so difficult because (a) you have to recognise you're in a slump; and (b) figuring out how to get out! The irony is that being a doctor means I sometimes neglect my own health 🙈 From personal experience, it's not easy - and the only way is to go slowly. I'm still trying - food, exercise, reading... I am just trying to do things for fun as well without an ulterior motive of productivity! I guess we're all just constantly learning and trying to get to a better place!
Reading fiction helps me escape ordinary life. It opens up a whole new world to me! I get to be a “fly on the wall” and watch things unfold. Not to mention, it’s a wonderful mental break. I love it!
Well, you just caught the very essence of my lifestyle with the "brick collector" part and also with your example of not taking care of my appearance too much. I'm not ugly but I could look WAY better than I do. Just today I caught myself skipping a shower before work because I rather browsed reddit a few more minutes in bed. I know all these things and yet I can't push myself to change them.
One of my fav creators.Your videos always calm me and make me reconsider things about my life. You are turning your life experiences into wisdom. You give me hope that If I continue pushing myself I will reach a better place.Bless you💗
Lana you are a unique treasure in the TH-cam space. There is so much saturation with content these days, it can feel hard to find something really meaningful and deep. It feels as though most things are now a copy of a copy of a copy. So thank you for your to the point, in depth, and heartfelt content. It is really a source of hope and inspiration for me while I navigate a new phase of my life.
With reading fiction I feel like it’s great to be able to live many perspectives and lives through the characters. It might help us to learn compassion, empathy but also expanding our own perspectives. Also just reading can help with writing skills, vocabulary etc. Also fun!
Thank you, Lana! I am crying right now because this resonated so much with me. I have been in a slump for all of 2021 and I did not realize it. I feel so guilty now having wasted my time and having let go of myself. It is time to take care of myself. Maybe if I feel good about myself from the outwards, it will slowly translate to loving myself inwards.
I don't know how you do it, Lana, but your videos are always exactly what I need. SO many times have I felt a certain way, and almost everytime your words accurately entwine with the what I need to hear. Thank you so much
reading itself -no matter what-, is a way for things to fall in their place. or in a place, at least. words and language and the way the writer choose to narrate does that. so i love it. i love to read how the writer describe things.
i am amazed by your ability to question even the simplest of things, and in the process of doing so, you give the people watching the tools to think and reflect about what's going on in their lives. this video was something i needed to watch, thank you lana
I had a great discovery about fiction books. Basically, I've used to read a lot of fiction, then I started working 9-5 and started reading self-help books because I thought I would learn a lot. Up to 2021 I was reading just non-fiction for years, then in 2021 I went back to fiction and... oh my god... it changed me so much. It fed my soul, I learned so much, it was fun and useful. It made me remember why I love books so much and why they are a huge part in my life.
Wow , this was exactly what I was going through.. I spent 2020-2021 very depressed, paralyzed by fear, and not taking care of myself. Similar to you, I didn’t notice until someone pointed out that I never seem to do the things I love anymore. It was really a wake up call, I definitely need to do better for me, because I deserve to live a happier life and so do you. Thanks for this video ❤️
Hi Lana, and everyone out there! I highly resonate with the whole video and even with your timing. I got back to yoga a week ago, did the exact same thing with the clothes and the cosmetics (now I am also considering a new hairstyle), and felt the same way, and even did it for the same reasons. Moreover, the last few months have really expanded my horizons in the world of books. I have always been like you - always wanting to read meaningful things, have meaningful connections and just develop constantly. That is being a maximalist. I was over-controlling my thoughts, reactions and reality. Until I realised that life is for living. That books like Harry Potter and many others which at first might seem to some as a "waste of time" actually include pretty precisely great archetypes, amazing stories and most importantly life as it is. And I am not speaking about the fantasy creatures but the things that happen to them. The many encounters that the characters are facing. Ever since I did a course on Creative writing I try to read as many different books as possible. And my 2022 list has a variety of genres because I have found for myself that I want to experience more of this life. Not just in my thoughts. Last but not least, by allowing myself to meet with people who are a different type than I am, I saw that we often speak about the same things but just in a different language. Some learn about things through watching series, and some through reading books. Some do it by focusing their time on philosophical teachings, and others simply use the stage of life. Life is about finding a balance. And once we have been so alone, not lonely, I believe that now is our time to get out there and just practise everything we have learned, and do our own thing. Be like kids. And live with joy and appreciation of life. I literally wished for myself to stop thinking too much and just live. And I hope you have the inspiration to do the same if you feel like that's what you need. Have a great day and year ahead!
Love this topic! And to add onto the inner vs outer self at 03:53 - this also extends to the state of our underwear or socks 😬 It’s easy to fall into the “no one’s gonna see it so who cares” mentality but underneath it all - YOU know. Such a seemingly small thing like nice, matching underwear or socks with no holes can definitely add to how good you feel about yourself on the inside. ✨😎✨
Oh God, what you said about the books really hit close home. Every time I was reading some book that was not educational or self help, I would feel guilty and immediately stop to look for a book of that genre, which ended at not reading at all or not enjoying it. But, I realized when I read fantasy/romance books I can find this main character or comfort character that makes me feel like I’m so much more than this. That I’m powerful and so many lessons that I would never understand coming from an educational book. Plus, these days I’ve been feeling super lost about my life, and finding your channel was a pure blessing. Tysm for this, sending you lots of love.
To me, something happened on the morning of January 2nd, 2022. After being miserable for pretty much the whole 2021, I got up on the second day of the New year, decluttered about 40 items, organized my wardrobe. Since then i started reading a new book, went on a hike and went back to pilates classes and set boundaries at work. Also i set timer for my screen time because finding out that one day in December my screen time time was 9 hours made me physically sick
I appreciate you for the reminder that we are human and perfection is not the goal but working towards who we know we can become, day by day. You are amazing and are worthy of being here in this moment in time
Reading fiction can explore scenarios that you can identify with in different ways within your own life. It can stimulate a new thought pattern or even a whole new way of thinking. Less educational, more insightful. I feel like how you interpret the story will be different to everyone else in a lot of cases even though it’s the same text. Great video as usual :)
I just love your channel so much! I'm way older than you but I feel like you are on the same wave length in so many ways. I enjoy all your videos, love how self-reflective you are, love your wisdom and love your humour. Perhaps most of all I love how you allow your uniqueness to shine through - you are a real gift and I appreciate you :). As for fiction and non-fiction, I love both but definitely feel that fiction has been massively formative for me and - no exaggeration - saved my mental health from careening out of control. You inspire me and I'm even considering trying what you do though I don't know if I could make it work. Anyway, just wanted to thank you and let you know you make a difference :) xo
The phrase I say to myself every time I watch a video of yours: “She gets it”. And I don’t know if this is just me but I feel like a warm hand touches my heart with every thought you share. So Thanks for that (I don’t get much warmth regularly 😅). The other thing is, the way you look beyond things is so relatable especially this idea of “Going back to basics” and as much as it helps us see a bigger picture than usual, it can hold us back sometimes. That’s why I really like “Don’t be a brick collector” way of thinking. The last thing is: please please please, Sing More 😂♥️♥️. Thanks Lana.
I'm totally with you, Lana. I have trouble doing things just for fun, and reading fiction has been one of those things. It's hard for some of us (INFJs, for instance) to stop feeling like we always have to be doing and just enjoy being. But if we don't, inevitably, slumps and burnout will happen. Speaking from experience here.
This is the common challenge of being an INFJ! Growing up I hated writing essays and papers b/c it would take me forever to start with the research and outlining phases. But once I started to do something and get into a groove of things, I'm relentless to finish haha. Thanks for the reminder that changes can be small but have a huge impact
I guess you gave me a reason to change up although I've many reasons to make me do efforts for myself , I've been feeling so low this year , some friends left me and it was awful moments for me , I've been crying like for 2 months and studies aren't going well , everyone seems getting their life together but not me! So I was thinking and asking myself what am doin mg wrong! then I accidently saw your video and it helped me ♥️ I feel like am ready to take it up a level and glow up so thank you!
I was raised on Fantasy books. Starting with Tolkien. And I still do read them a lot. And all of those made me write my own Fantasy series, that I am about to publish in February, so... I guess they are inspiring :)
This is very wise... However, I really wonder what makes me happy like really happy. I feel like I have tried to please so many people since i was so young that i lost clarity of what I want and what makes me truly happy.
nive video Lana ✅ Brick collector here..haha. What helped me start to do more and think a little less was to allow myself to to things badly. Not everything has to be perfect when you are first starting out.
You are so right about The planning phase and getting stuck. I am so happy made this video because I have felt everything you described. You made me feel like I'm less crazy Than I thought. Anyway keep following through you're doing a really good job thanks for sharing Your story. It helps a lot and you're worth the trouble So keep doing the things that feel good for you. Love and light Mia
Reading Stoner for the second time now, which I know is a favorite of this channel (thanks for the rec!!). It’s still so eye opening and beautiful. I think this book is a great example of how much fiction can teach you about life
When I dress nice I feel better to take on the world. Even when nobody sees it and I'm trying to work at home. I don't get in the right mindset with sweatpants on. And it's all about mindset. That's the same as listening to fitting music like mozart to make you study better.
Hello, I refer you to someone who helped me get my ex lover back, his name is Dr Emma, he can make your ex come back to you immediately. I will advise you seek his help thanks.
The clothes analogy is so important. When we wear something that we don't care for and we think "no one's going to see it anyway", I think we indirectly imply two things: that we are no one and that we don't care about our opinion of ourselves which further puts us down. It's all connected, our inner affects our outer world and the outer world affects our inner world which is why we tend to spiral downwards and things compound as the cycle perpetuates itself. I hope I'm making sense, might make a video to clarify
What you wrote makes sense to me. I think your excellent and yet easy-to-understand analogy of wearing clothes others don't care lead to a negative spiral of feeling an unworthy self that matters to no one including to own self. Thanks for expressing your awareness based on Lana's this video.
@@AwakenYourInnerBuddha Thanks so much 😅 I was worried I might be rambling
@@ZED2.0 We all share that concern. But Lana's Ro community on this page is so good at inviting us to express ourselves and recognize each other. Looking forward to hearing how your insight further develops!
You make the most sense.
@@ZED2.0 Spot on analogy and pattern of effect pathway analogy. As far as bring apologetic for feeling as if you are rambling... this is something I too do all the time as well. I have confirmed over and over that I am simply noting the barriers to the majorities limitations to interpretation and moreso even to their attention span as well as my own hardship at summarizing/ maintaining others attention this way when I think and weigh every detail as learned best practice... Now I am feeling like I am rambling, 😆... We know we are solid at best in current thinking by considering all the variables we have to work with and utilizing the many tools/abilities gained over the years through circumstance and seeking understanding and solution. Expansive thinking simplified but also given the expanded pathways that led to current conclusions represents a point of full strength. Well that is my goal and current realization. Work in progress.
The "don't be a brick collector" is so important because I think I plan too much to get the circumstances perfect that I end up not doing it. The core reason might be I'm scared of those change so that I think about it too much as a form of a procrastination.
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Sometimes it just needs a gentle reminder from someone to push you into the direction which the answer was in front of you all the time. I feel you :)
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I personally think reading fiction feeds our inner child. There is something about being in another world, a sense of wonder. There are usually hidden lessons and ideas within the plots and characters that I believe we are meant to learn from! Great video, Lana 💌
Yep fully agree. There are always helpful life lessons which you can find in fiction books
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Yes
does that mean if you dont read fiction you're neglecting and slowly starving/killing a child?
@@dreuvasdevil9395 yes
“You don’t always need a plan. Sometimes you just need to breathe, trust, let go and see what happens.” Sharing some love with ya all
Yap..
I actually think fiction books can teach us things that self-help or non-fiction can't. And they also help us to see life through someone else's lens. I prefer a balance between the two. For instance, my goal is to read atleast one non-fiction and one fiction book per week.
Anyway, loved the video! I really liked the brick collecting part. I think it'll be kind of like a motivation to me. Thank you, Lana.
Don't be too hard on yourself if you can't read 2 books in a week. As long as you're reading and enjoy reading, that's all that matters. I'm only saying this because I personally can't read 2 books a week due to work and studies, despite me craving to read the books I got for Christmas and wanting to finish them ASAP and ending up feeling bad if i hadn't read something after an entire day
Tldr dont be so frigid with the week long time constraint! Read whenever you can and if you enjoy it and it works for you, keep doing it
so true, agreed
@@avoatlaw I really appreciate your advice, thank you! And oh yes, I definitely keep that in mind. I just keep a goal for myself and then I try to achieve it, but again, I don't beat myself up for not reading regularly. I don't want reading to become a chore.
Sometimes, I do feel bad for not reading, but now, I try to not be so hard on myself. Because being a student and then managing all your tasks is hard. I'll definitely keep your words in mind, thanks a lot!
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totally agree! I love reading fiction, it helps me de-stress and also a good book is one of the best things ever, for me anyway. I can enjoy non fiction but most of the time fiction is what I like.
I feel so called out by the "no one is going to see it" so you don't bother- I feel like this has been me throughout covid/lockdown and has really affected the way I feel about myself! I also love the term "brick collector", it reminds me of what James Clear says about being in motion (ie planning) vs being in action and how being in motion for too long makes you feel like you're being in productive so you procrastinate on action. Great video :)
Fantastic
This video literally made me cry - I always deprive myself of those small joys like buying new skincare products or trying a new recipe because I categorised those things as unimportant. Thank you for the reminder that's important to give ourselves nice things.
I did too for such a long time. I’ve completely changed my mind. Go treat yourself!!
I think that clothes can be important :) and I'm telling this from 31 year old guy perspective who always thought: "i don't care about clothes too much", "those who improve their mood by shopping are just weak people". But then i discovered that ie. after having a new haircut (at hairdresser), i feel more confident, i feel more attractive, and as a result I have better mood. I don't like spending too much money on clothes but i can't deny that this winter i bought fantastic shoes, i get a lot of compliments, and as a result, I can say that it was a good decision, and at least few times, such ridiculous thing as shoes, actually, improved my happiness.
Also, I learnt that if I like something, not necessary deep, important (like buying shoes as an example), then it doesn't make me a weak, or shallow person. I still have same hobbies, same values as before.
Depression is so powerful it transforms us silently to humans we're not proud of physically and mentally, it transforms us slowly until we hit rock bottom we don't see anything coming, it takes a comment/stare from others to wake us up, whoever is reading this, I wish you lot of strength for this 2022 !!! This video made me cry a little bit....I relate to you in each minute of this video, the change is now for our well being !! 💪🏼
Ultimately it doesn't matter where you are right now, or where you will ever be. What matters is your trajectory.
So every day, ask yourself "are you better today, than you were yesterday?"
And like Lana says, it's not about 5am cold showers, but doing things that genuinely increase your mood and happiness.
You’re always popping at the right time like superman, when it’s needed.
Can we talk about how on point your hair is today?! Gorgeous as always!
Thanks so much
"Let's not question our happiness too much" yess been thinking abt this tooo. Love u!!
Have you ever thought about writing a book? The way you tell stories, the way you speak, you’re so artistic. You seriously fascinate me and I’d 100% read your book
someone told me to read an educational book once a month and for me who reads fiction books all my life, it's difficult to find it enjoyable so i put in my to-do-list.
when i started reading the book that she recommended for the month, it didn't feel right. i can't understand anything and the informations aren't staying in my brain. I have this mindset that when you read educational books, you have to remember it; you have to learn from it and for me who has really high standards for learning, it just wasn't for me. then i realized that i shouldn't put reading a book in my to-do-list. i never realized the meaning of "doing something at your own pace" until someone told me to read a non fiction book once a month. i realized that reading book for me is my life of emotions. i read books to feel good. i read books to feel sad. but that to-do-list made me read books as a responsibility. and it's also the same with learning. i learn for fun. i learn the things i'm interested in. and reading educational books with a sense of responsibility took away the "fun". all my life, I've always wanted to have the "perfect life", i do what most people do and find the fun in there but last year i realized that living for myself is much more important and being happy with the things i have.
goals make me intimidated. the responsibility behind the goals that i have to achieve in a certain amount of time scares me. so i just started living my life in the present moment. although, maybe it's not healthy as for other people's idealism, it makes me happy and i find it fun.
Good discussion question at the end...Fantasy/fiction has taught me more about my life than most of the self help stuff out there. Harry Potter taught me that I cannot live my life in fear and that if im going to make that happen, i cannot simply go with the flow of society...I have to find the courage, maybe break some rules.... That's what Harry does throughout the entire series. I found the courage to start my own yt channel, something i wanted to do for a long time.
I've spent the new year in the cardiac intensive care unit with unexplained heart failure. Lots of tests; lots of unanswered questions; lots of scary possibilities for a young, otherwise healthy distance runner. So I've been looking forward to these posts even more than usual-as something to punctuate the monotony with something pleasant rather than anxiety-inducing. Listening to a calming voice just now has helped to soothe my nerves and provide some comfort and even hope at a difficult time. Thank you.
Wishing you a speedy recovery and full health
Dear Lana: I find it rather confusing that so many "liked" comments are for comments with zero substance or positivity (see: "First") whereas comments that are consistently positive and supportive such as from individuals as above are often ignored. I'm obviously not condemning you for such things, as I know absolutely nothing of your life, yet I would suggest that those who put more thought, care, and time into their outward support to you deserve more time than the ones who put little to no thought, effort, or time towards you. I find this very confusing, especially considering the content posted on your pages. I hope to only be constructive and supporting in this comment - not just supporting you, but those who do put the genuine time and sincere effort to reach out to you and try to support you through this incredibly limited medium that is TH-cam. Keep up the good, everyone.
@@Zigg317 I'm not sure what you're talking about. I think the comments section on Lana's videos may be the most civilised and profound on TH-cam that I've ever seen.
@@Vivi_9 Hi Vivi; What I’m getting at is that Lana replies to or likes most commonly only the comments that are a sentence fragment or very superficial, rather than the comments like above or the others that have substance. Yes, those who do comment seem more eloquent than other sites, but that’s not the issue or topic of debate, rather the effort to recognize and promote those comments doesn’t seem to be there.
@@Zigg317 dude, content creators don't have time to read every comment, and even if they did they wouldn't respond to every one. Comments don't need promoting and you should never expect a response just for writing one.
A while back I learned from the Buddha something called Impermanence. This has changed my life completely and now I take all the changes in my life with open arms. It was so life changing that I’ve even made a video speaking a about this. Thanks for sharing Lana ❤️ - Migue
I will treat don't be a brick collector. Thank you for the reminder!
I've been needing a change for a while now and this was definitely eye opening. I love your idea of not being a brick collector specifically for things like exercising. We're used to the idea of someone in workout clothes at the ideal time of day in the ideal setting through social media and that doesn't need to be the case for us to get moving and that applies for any aspect of life. Thank you for this video Lana, it's a powerful one.
Yes, agreed. I've always told myself I can't do whatever things because it needed to be perfect and that just added so much anxiety and stress on myself.
I used to only read educational books because they offer structural tips, but later on I realize my system of learning and life through practice.
I started reading Harry Potter because my niece asked me to read to her. It’s very inspiring fiction just learning how the author use her imagination fly through the lens of a child and other different roles. The vivid description of Harry Potter inspires me to speak out my mind in a more descriptive way and helps me how to engage with listeners, viewers and readers through language.
Rise of Neville Longbottom and Ginny Weasly has taught me so much more than any selfhelp book has ever done :)
Powerful words Lana!🙌🏽 Who needs a change right now?!🙋🏽♀️ if you are reading this hopefully get the change you need in your life💕 happy 2022 people ✨
You too!
@@nder767 Thank you 🥺🙏
Hooked on this channel. This woman is very intelligent. Don't see my comments as rude just male perspective on the subject. I turned off TV now for 2 years and very happy and learning about other people perspectives very rewarding. I am a veiled birth and Aquarius
Beautiful talk Lana.💕
Doing new activities helps in getting out of the slump. New things always give us a surge of energy.
To everyone reading my comment, God is watching over you and everything will be okay.💕
Changing my life this year by starting my TH-cam channel! Love your vids Lana you're a big inspiration!!
Oh yes that's awesome!
@@LanaBlakely really excited to see where 2022 takes us!!
You learn from fiction in a very different way. Educational books usually tell you things. Good fiction indirectly invites you to think about questions you may have not thought about. Flowers for Algernon made me think about my own struggle to find friends. Nothing by Janne Teller made me think more about the point of life in a gripping way. But if fiction does none of that just makes me giggle, or makes me feel strong emotions, I consider that a success.
Mistborn is my fav fantasy series of all-time.
Im also exploring what I can do 'just for fun' and not always having to be productive or even learning. But also not like watching Netflix shows endlessly...
I don't normally comment on videos so this is new for me. I've been watching your channel for about three years now I think, I really enjoy your content and it's helped me a lot throughout my journey. I find your content to be very thought-provoking, inspiring, and motivational.
I have had the opposite for me where I have in the past read a lot of fiction, romance and fantasy mostly. I have in about the past 5 or 6 months been reading more and more self-help books, I have learned and have grown so much, it's crazy to look back on everything I have been through and have overcome.
I have found a balance where I read a healthy amount of fiction and non-fiction alike where I continue to learn and grow from both. I only follow what makes me feel good and continues to add value to my life and I hope that you continue to do the same for yourself.
You continue to inspire me and your work adds so much value to my life and the life of others.
Reading fiction is inspiring for me. Healing. Is seeing people make mistakes, try their best, move, get stuck. I don't know how to explain it... but I learn. I heal.
Oh my gosh you are brilliant, a fantastic speaker, in fact you are one of the finest speakers…
You're a beautiful human being, your heart and soul are full of golden purity. Thank you for sharing your brilliant self with the world. Everything has the capacity to edify.💎♾️
I resonated so much with that brick collecting analogy I feel like I’ve been collecting bricks for years now and it’s become so heavy that it’s hard to move all at once…this video feels like a great reminder that I don’t have to suddenly wake up one day and decide I’m gonna throw all the bricks away magically it’s gonna take time and I have to allow myself that time instead of being in a rush to get somewhere I think I’m supposed to be going.
As a fellow INFJ, I can relate to this especially last year where I felt really stuck in a rut. But since the new year has come, I told myself that I need to let go of the things that's slowing me down. I don't know if it's just in the mindset and having a sense of fresh start, but these past few days have been really productive to me. Started to take care of myself again plus now I'm approaching things with a beginner's mindset and it made a lot of difference. I know real change takes time and I have a long way to go but I'm just really glad that there's progress this time. Thank you again Lana for the Notion tutorial, now I get to track my progress via the self nurturing page. :)
I just voted in Video's Title in Instagram and it came up. I think I really need to watch this.
Thanks for the vote!
In terms of fiction books and even to some respects TV and movies, I think they immerse you into a new experience, expand your imagination which can then inspire you in a totally different way. Kind of like when you walk into a museum and you see paintings that an artist created a few hundred years ago and you stand in awe that another human being had the capacity to create something so amazing.
*20 Life-Tips I wish I Knew In My 20s:*
1. Marry the right one
2. Don't Lie, ever
3. Learn to be Brave
4. Learn to Say No
5. Be curious about everything (ask questions)
6. Develop a Code and Live By It
7. Be Patient with Yourself (but put in the work)
8. Learn to Listen
9. Avoid Debt (big one! if you want to make some moolah!)
10. Seek out a Mentor
11. Develop a Space to Confined In and Ask Questions
12. Be Kind, Be Compassionate
13. World changes constantly, keep an open mind
14. Stop Nail-biting & nail-picking habit
15. No dirty websites
16. Read more (it’s actually really good for you - makes you more intelligent)
17. Limited time for gaming
18. Not drinking too much
19. No drugs
20. Enjoy life, smile
Take it easy and I hope you found one thing helpful in this list
As a person who reads mostly fiction, I learned more things and lessons from fiction books and it helped me be more imaginative and creative which lead me to putting things into action too
Thanks for this Lana ❤ It's so difficult because (a) you have to recognise you're in a slump; and (b) figuring out how to get out! The irony is that being a doctor means I sometimes neglect my own health 🙈 From personal experience, it's not easy - and the only way is to go slowly. I'm still trying - food, exercise, reading... I am just trying to do things for fun as well without an ulterior motive of productivity! I guess we're all just constantly learning and trying to get to a better place!
God I hear you on this. I tell myself slow and steady wins the race
I like you more and more with every new clip! So young and yet so wise!! Well done!
Reading fiction helps me escape ordinary life. It opens up a whole new world to me! I get to be a “fly on the wall” and watch things unfold. Not to mention, it’s a wonderful mental break. I love it!
You are clearly happier. It's visible and audible.
I just want to say that you've really helped me as an introvert, seeing your confidence in the paris vlog was dope !!!!
This video has given me so much insights! Thank you for releasing this video, Lana ❤
Well, you just caught the very essence of my lifestyle with the "brick collector" part and also with your example of not taking care of my appearance too much. I'm not ugly but I could look WAY better than I do. Just today I caught myself skipping a shower before work because I rather browsed reddit a few more minutes in bed.
I know all these things and yet I can't push myself to change them.
OMG A NEW VIDEO!!! We love you so much Lana. Thanks for making more contents!!! Keep it up! ❤️
Thanks for being here!!
@@LanaBlakely OMG QUEEN!! You literally deserve all the love and support from your fans!! Keep safe and healthy!!
One of my fav creators.Your videos always calm me and make me reconsider things about my life. You are turning your life experiences into wisdom. You give me hope that If I continue pushing myself I will reach a better place.Bless you💗
Your videos are fire I listen to them in the car after work.
Lana you are a unique treasure in the TH-cam space. There is so much saturation with content these days, it can feel hard to find something really meaningful and deep. It feels as though most things are now a copy of a copy of a copy. So thank you for your to the point, in depth, and heartfelt content. It is really a source of hope and inspiration for me while I navigate a new phase of my life.
With reading fiction I feel like it’s great to be able to live many perspectives and lives through the characters. It might help us to learn compassion, empathy but also expanding our own perspectives. Also just reading can help with writing skills, vocabulary etc. Also fun!
I think there is something to learn in every book you read. Life is for learning, I learn something new every day.
Thank you, Lana! I am crying right now because this resonated so much with me. I have been in a slump for all of 2021 and I did not realize it. I feel so guilty now having wasted my time and having let go of myself. It is time to take care of myself. Maybe if I feel good about myself from the outwards, it will slowly translate to loving myself inwards.
I don't know how you do it, Lana, but your videos are always exactly what I need. SO many times have I felt a certain way, and almost everytime your words accurately entwine with the what I need to hear. Thank you so much
I need a basic get ready with me or a outfit capsule video 😩😩your fits are soo cutee
you are my favorite youtube right now thank you
reading itself -no matter what-, is a way for things to fall in their place. or in a place, at least. words and language and the way the writer choose to narrate does that. so i love it. i love to read how the writer describe things.
i am amazed by your ability to question even the simplest of things, and in the process of doing so, you give the people watching the tools to think and reflect about what's going on in their lives. this video was something i needed to watch, thank you lana
I remember back when this channel barely had 40k in subscribers. It’s amazing how much this channel has blossomed into greatness 👍 ❤️
I had a great discovery about fiction books. Basically, I've used to read a lot of fiction, then I started working 9-5 and started reading self-help books because I thought I would learn a lot. Up to 2021 I was reading just non-fiction for years, then in 2021 I went back to fiction and... oh my god... it changed me so much. It fed my soul, I learned so much, it was fun and useful. It made me remember why I love books so much and why they are a huge part in my life.
Always happy when I receive your notification ❤️🥳
🎉
Wow , this was exactly what I was going through.. I spent 2020-2021 very depressed, paralyzed by fear, and not taking care of myself. Similar to you, I didn’t notice until someone pointed out that I never seem to do the things I love anymore. It was really a wake up call, I definitely need to do better for me, because I deserve to live a happier life and so do you. Thanks for this video ❤️
Hi Lana, and everyone out there! I highly resonate with the whole video and even with your timing. I got back to yoga a week ago, did the exact same thing with the clothes and the cosmetics (now I am also considering a new hairstyle), and felt the same way, and even did it for the same reasons. Moreover, the last few months have really expanded my horizons in the world of books. I have always been like you - always wanting to read meaningful things, have meaningful connections and just develop constantly. That is being a maximalist. I was over-controlling my thoughts, reactions and reality. Until I realised that life is for living. That books like Harry Potter and many others which at first might seem to some as a "waste of time" actually include pretty precisely great archetypes, amazing stories and most importantly life as it is. And I am not speaking about the fantasy creatures but the things that happen to them. The many encounters that the characters are facing. Ever since I did a course on Creative writing I try to read as many different books as possible. And my 2022 list has a variety of genres because I have found for myself that I want to experience more of this life. Not just in my thoughts. Last but not least, by allowing myself to meet with people who are a different type than I am, I saw that we often speak about the same things but just in a different language. Some learn about things through watching series, and some through reading books. Some do it by focusing their time on philosophical teachings, and others simply use the stage of life. Life is about finding a balance. And once we have been so alone, not lonely, I believe that now is our time to get out there and just practise everything we have learned, and do our own thing. Be like kids. And live with joy and appreciation of life. I literally wished for myself to stop thinking too much and just live. And I hope you have the inspiration to do the same if you feel like that's what you need. Have a great day and year ahead!
Blakely’s voice is like an angelic lullaby.
Love this topic! And to add onto the inner vs outer self at 03:53 - this also extends to the state of our underwear or socks 😬 It’s easy to fall into the “no one’s gonna see it so who cares” mentality but underneath it all - YOU know. Such a seemingly small thing like nice, matching underwear or socks with no holes can definitely add to how good you feel about yourself on the inside. ✨😎✨
I know this is not the point of this video, but your bangs are so cute!!
Oh God, what you said about the books really hit close home. Every time I was reading some book that was not educational or self help, I would feel guilty and immediately stop to look for a book of that genre, which ended at not reading at all or not enjoying it. But, I realized when I read fantasy/romance books I can find this main character or comfort character that makes me feel like I’m so much more than this. That I’m powerful and so many lessons that I would never understand coming from an educational book. Plus, these days I’ve been feeling super lost about my life, and finding your channel was a pure blessing. Tysm for this, sending you lots of love.
To me, something happened on the morning of January 2nd, 2022. After being miserable for pretty much the whole 2021, I got up on the second day of the New year, decluttered about 40 items, organized my wardrobe. Since then i started reading a new book, went on a hike and went back to pilates classes and set boundaries at work. Also i set timer for my screen time because finding out that one day in December my screen time time was 9 hours made me physically sick
I agree with your advice, your experience that you get all positive energy is very good, I will practice it for that change from you
I appreciate you for the reminder that we are human and perfection is not the goal but working towards who we know we can become, day by day. You are amazing and are worthy of being here in this moment in time
I love this! :) A great reminder that taking care of yourself physically has a much bigger impact than merely a vain/superficial pastime
Reading fiction can explore scenarios that you can identify with in different ways within your own life. It can stimulate a new thought pattern or even a whole new way of thinking. Less educational, more insightful. I feel like how you interpret the story will be different to everyone else in a lot of cases even though it’s the same text. Great video as usual :)
The clothes analogy is so important 🙏
Your videos give the vibe of a close, mature friend which we all need at the times when we can't push ourselves forward. Thanks a lot😊
Just discovered your channel today and it has already helped me a bunch
This made me get dressed and clean up my space, thank you!!
Small changes everyday are worth more than big changes occasionally!
Thank you, My friend.
This video applies to me so much. Thank you for doing this. It's good to look at these things to make the changes we want.
Its so nice to listen to your slow speaking. Makes it easier to understand :)
omg its like just i manifested this video or something i had been overwhelmed about this for a few hours and now- cant express how grateful i am!
I just love your channel so much! I'm way older than you but I feel like you are on the same wave length in so many ways. I enjoy all your videos, love how self-reflective you are, love your wisdom and love your humour. Perhaps most of all I love how you allow your uniqueness to shine through - you are a real gift and I appreciate you :). As for fiction and non-fiction, I love both but definitely feel that fiction has been massively formative for me and - no exaggeration - saved my mental health from careening out of control. You inspire me and I'm even considering trying what you do though I don't know if I could make it work. Anyway, just wanted to thank you and let you know you make a difference :) xo
The phrase I say to myself every time I watch a video of yours: “She gets it”. And I don’t know if this is just me but I feel like a warm hand touches my heart with every thought you share. So Thanks for that (I don’t get much warmth regularly 😅).
The other thing is, the way you look beyond things is so relatable especially this idea of “Going back to basics” and as much as it helps us see a bigger picture than usual, it can hold us back sometimes. That’s why I really like “Don’t be a brick collector” way of thinking.
The last thing is: please please please, Sing More 😂♥️♥️.
Thanks Lana.
If you enjoy something, it never will be a waste of time.
Thank u for your existence❤️❤️❤️
I'm totally with you, Lana. I have trouble doing things just for fun, and reading fiction has been one of those things. It's hard for some of us (INFJs, for instance) to stop feeling like we always have to be doing and just enjoy being. But if we don't, inevitably, slumps and burnout will happen. Speaking from experience here.
We have the same level of overthinking/analyzing everything to make sense of it. It makes me feel less crazy/more normal and therefore less alone.
This is the common challenge of being an INFJ! Growing up I hated writing essays and papers b/c it would take me forever to start with the research and outlining phases. But once I started to do something and get into a groove of things, I'm relentless to finish haha. Thanks for the reminder that changes can be small but have a huge impact
I guess you gave me a reason to change up although I've many reasons to make me do efforts for myself , I've been feeling so low this year , some friends left me and it was awful moments for me , I've been crying like for 2 months and studies aren't going well , everyone seems getting their life together but not me! So I was thinking and asking myself what am doin mg wrong! then I accidently saw your video and it helped me ♥️ I feel like am ready to take it up a level and glow up so thank you!
I was raised on Fantasy books. Starting with Tolkien. And I still do read them a lot.
And all of those made me write my own Fantasy series, that I am about to publish in February, so... I guess they are inspiring :)
Lana you inspire me so much I just wished I had the same mentality as you:( But youre an amazing person.
Rooting for your changes🤩.
This is very wise... However, I really wonder what makes me happy like really happy. I feel like I have tried to please so many people since i was so young that i lost clarity of what I want and what makes me truly happy.
Was looking for this video ♥️ came right on time
Awesome
nive video Lana ✅
Brick collector here..haha. What helped me start to do more and think a little less was to allow myself to to things badly. Not everything has to be perfect when you are first starting out.
You are so right about The planning phase and getting stuck. I am so happy made this video because I have felt everything you described. You made me feel like I'm less crazy Than I thought. Anyway keep following through you're doing a really good job thanks for sharing Your story. It helps a lot and you're worth the trouble So keep doing the things that feel good for you. Love and light Mia
Reading Stoner for the second time now, which I know is a favorite of this channel (thanks for the rec!!). It’s still so eye opening and beautiful. I think this book is a great example of how much fiction can teach you about life
When I dress nice I feel better to take on the world. Even when nobody sees it and I'm trying to work at home. I don't get in the right mindset with sweatpants on. And it's all about mindset. That's the same as listening to fitting music like mozart to make you study better.
Your videos bring me so much calm and direction. Thank you for all your work, Lana.
Hello, I refer you to someone who helped me get my ex lover back, his name is Dr Emma, he can make your ex come back to you immediately. I will advise you seek his help thanks.