Hotel Books "Wooden Floorboards"
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 6 ก.พ. 2025
- Off the Album "Run Wild, Young Beauty"
CD: store.invoguere...
iTunes: itun.es/i67v5qd
Spotify: spoti.fi/2pZulQG
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I have these voices in my brain and I created them and I hate them, but I ask them to stay. Cause I have this fixation on death, this fixation on change, this fixation three years I grew out of pain. This fixation on sleep. This fixation on you and on me, but who could I be? I spent three years writing poems about a fixation on the past, and she told me it was worth it, because she told me it would last. But darling, I will hold my tongue as I hold you tight because forgetting what you think love means is my sleeping pill every night. I remember when you woke up and screamed “maybe our love is just laced with LSD, because darling, I’m high on life and you’re just high on me.” And as I tried my best to read between the lines, your lips shape words I try to interpret as lies, only to see the devil behind deep inside the details. As Lucifer found his way back into retail, my dear, he sold us a product we didn’t want to buy. But we weren’t trying to be original, we just trying to survive. The voices in my brain telling me it’s all in my head. I will sleep with one eye open but I won’t sleep until I’m dead. Cause a fair assessment of a existence is an inconsistent realist vision of selfish antics reduced to survival of the fittest defined by our ability to avoid those caring any sickness. And these whispers in my head intensify to raspy screams asking when my skull will explode so they can breathe. They know that no one has a voice when no one is listening and the violent riot of staying silent or quiet is torturous to those who need to hear something and that violence has its own sort of beauty. And you are my beauty. And you are my violent smile. And you are my violent prayer. And you’re not my oxygen but I breathe your air. ‘Cause these voices in my brain remind me of past mistakes, the beauty I found of being able to say, “Look what I went through, I survived.” But is survival living or is survival just a placeholder for a vacant mind to cut off the threat to coincide with the soil while their blood boils? ‘Cause my biggest fear was never facing death or even facing what happens after. My biggest fear was never facing anything like that. My biggest fear was waking up in that coffin with all these voices chanting a chorus of remorse, a forced abort from the course I had chosen. And now I’m laying here frozen with fear staring up at a splintering slab of wood paid for with my life savings buried beneath the earth that grew the weeds that poisoned my families feet. What if I woke up and walked back home and it was like nothing had happened? “We left your room the way you left it, we just scrubbed the blood stains out of the carpet, we just rubbed the mud remains out your pockets, we just dubbed the tough claims out of your sonnets. We just evacuated your room and hoped you would too but your spirit haunted it too long so we boarded it up moved along and watched it become a guest room. A place for the non-permanent inhabitants to exist in this home we created to raise our kid.” That was my biggest fear, finding out something like that would happen. ‘Cause the memories have come with this, only cause everything else to hurt deep inside of this dismissed feeling I feel. But sometimes you have to face the past. Maybe I’ve never faced death but if I were to walk away then what would I be? These voices in my head, what would they say and what would they see? Did I survive or am I cursed? Did I die or did I learn? What if I woke up and nothing happened? What if I never wake up? My dear, then what’s my purpose? What if I woke up and nothing happened? And darling, what if you woke up too?
"And darling, darling... What if you woke up too?"
Gives me chills.
oh my god, same
I'm not sure I understanding the meaning of that last line
Jay Q pretty sure somebody passed away. either that or its a figure of speech like what if you woke up and realized all this is wrong idk something like that
it's a story of a man dealing with depression after his wife commit suicide.
what also gets to me is ''we dubbed the tough claims out of your sonnets''
Every word, every phrase, hits me harder everytime, gives me hope, sadness, happiness, anger... It's unreal... and i'm in love with it.
lol u sugg
Do you still listen?
The first line "I have these voices in my brain and I created them and I hate them, but I ask them to stay." Got me right in the feels. My whole depression was based on all of those voices.
I hope you're doing well
Yeah.. I am.
Jasmine Litsa Stay strong! Everything will be fine! Trust me! :)
I fucking agree. Going through it for so fucking long it becomes a home that you’re afraid to leave.
JESUS Christ loves you
Oh my god his voice sounds so broken...this always gives me goosebumps.
"what if i woke up and nothing happened? what if i never wake up, my dear, then whats my purpose?"
hits me hard every time
midwest emo poems on sad instrumentals will always be my fav art form
"We left your room the way you left it, we just scrubbed the blood stains out of the carpet, we just rubbed the mud remains out of your pockets, we just dubbed the tough claims out of your sonnets."
This hits me hard.
forever broken and unafraid My favorite fucking part.
2:14 This man is beyond this realm with the lyricism and literature from this point on.
Tommy Pickles wow who knew tommy pickles was so deep
Phan Is my religion MY SAME THOUGHTS
I am schizophrenic, I found this song the same morning my doctor told me that I have Schizophrenia, PTSD and Suicidal Tendencies (great band btw).
The first verse always makes me cry. It hits home too fucking close.
Speechless.
he shows so much emotion while talking, it actually makes me feel what he's saying, other than that I always listen to this song on depressing nights, because I understand the song.
These lyrics hit deep. Someone who has been through a lot. And speaks up. That's rare. Courage. Strength. But the vocalist explains, along with how he shows his anger, and emotions through his voice. Pure art.
I can't believe I'm just hearing him. I feel the pain in his voice.
I haven’t listened to this song in about 5 years and still pour my eyes out with a tight chest, shouting every word. This song has always resonated with me more than any other.
most of their songs are a great theme song for my feelings
Parker do you have severe deressiom too ? 😔
Hands down most emotional track on the album. Absolutely can't wait for vinyl.
Damn, it's so heavy & I repeat this song over and over again..
This man is so flawless, you can feel the presence of his rage & sadness through this song. So epic
Seriously....... This is lyrical talent. So many feels.
I never cried so much to a band...
I listened to this on a hospital rooftop, watching the sunrise. As the music began to crescendo, a flock of black birds began to swirl above my head and then off into the horizon... It was a pretty film-like moment.
I love sitting at my window at nighy, listening to their songs and just watching into the sky filled with stars. It's the best feeling ever. The night/summer smell. My god
I'll never forget someone asking if I was okay after blasting this 😂
"What if I woke up and walked back home and it was like nothing had happened?" this single phrase has so much concentrated hurt mixed with a sort of innocence in it.. It breaks me almost every time I listen to this song because I have felt those words in my bones, and it is not a pleasant feeling..
Same here. Especially given the context of the song, combined with the final line.
"Darling.. What if you woke up, too?"
Either she's dead, or it's a break up song. Either way, he misses this girl so much.
these lyrics are so deep and complicated, i really find it hard to understand but still really enjoy it
"We weren't tying to be original, we were trying to survive."
Explains my life.
coming back to this 5 years later and still hits the feels perfectly
I can't express the love I have for this beautiful masterpiece of a poet. He is truly the Edgar Allan Poe of modern times.
I've listened to all of these songs for about 4 years and they never get old.
Lsd is simply a window to the deepest darkest depths of ones own soul. And those who have gone there will understand what he is saying is a beautiful articulation of the human mind. And in respect to all of this, as wonderful as I find it, most humans don't realize that they have a soul.
I have these voices in my brain
I created them and I hate them,
But I ask them to stay
'Cause I have this fixation on death,
This fixation on change,
This fixation on three years I grew out of pain.
This fixation on sleep.
This fixation on you and on me,
But who could I be?
I spent three years writing poems
About a fixation on the past,
And she told me it was worth it,
Because she told me it would last.
But, darling, I will hold my tongue as I hold you tight,
'Cause forgetting what you think love means is my sleeping pill every night.
I remember when you woke up and screamed,
"Maybe our love is just laced with LSD,
'Cause, darling, I'm high on life and you're just high on me."
And as I tried my best to read between the lines,
Your lips shaped words I try to interpret as lies,
Only to see the devil hiding deep inside the details.
As Lucifer found his way back into retail, my dear,
He sold us a product we didn't wanna buy.
But we weren't trying to be original,
We were just trying to survive.
The voices in my brain telling me it's all in my head.
And I'll sleep with one eye open but I won't sleep until I'm dead
'Cause a fair assessment of an existence is an inconsistent
Realist vision of selfish antics
Reduced to survival of the fittest
Defined by our ability to avoid those carrying any sickness.
And these whispers in my head intensify to raspy screams
Asking when my skull will explode so they can breathe.
They know that no one has a voice when no one is listening
And the violent riot of staying silent or quiet is torturous to those who need to hear something
And that violence has its own sort of beauty.
And you are my beauty.
And you're my violent smile.
And you are my violent prayer.
And you're not my oxygen but I breathe your air
'Cause these voices in my brain remind me of past mistakes,
The beauty I found of being able to say, "Look what I went through, I survived."
But is survival living or is survival just a placeholder for a vacant mind to cut off the threat to coincide with the soil while their blood boils?
'Cause my biggest fear was never facing death or even facing what happens after.
My biggest fear was never facing anything like that.
My biggest fear was waking up in that coffin
With these voices chanting a chorus of remorse, a forced abort from the course I had chosen.
And now I'm laying here frozen
With fear staring up at a splintering slab of wood
Paid for with my life savings
Buried beneath the earth that grew the weeds
That poisoned my family's feet.
What if I woke up, walked back home and it was like nothing had happened?
"We left your room the way you left it,
We just scrubbed the blood stains out of the carpet,
We just rubbed the mud remains out your pockets,
We just dubbed the tough claims out of your sonnets.
We just evacuated your room and hoped you would too
But your spirit haunted it too long so we boarded it,
Up moved along and watched it become a guest room.
A place for the non-permanent inhabitants to exist
Within this home we created to raise our kid."
That was my biggest fear, finding out something like that would happen.
'Cause the memories have come with this
Only cause everything else to hurt deep inside of this dismissed feeling I feel.
But sometimes you have to face the past.
And maybe I've never faced death
But if I were to walk away then what would I be?
These voices in my head,
What would they say and what would they see?
Did I survive or am I cursed?
Did I die or did I learn?
What if I woke up like nothing happened?
What if I never wake up?
My dear, then what's my purpose?
What if I woke up like nothing happened?
And, darling, darling, what if you woke up too?
you can hear his pain you can feel it in your chest and when you hear him just breathing and hurting, man this is real.
"I have these voices in my brain and I created them and I hate them, but I ask them to stay."
This keeps going over and over in my head because how true it is
the voices in my brain tell me its all in my head...
and I'll sleep with one eye open, but I won't sleep till I'm dead
cause a fair assessment of a existence is an inconsistent realist vision of selfish antics reduced to survival of the fittest defined by our ability to avoid those carrying any sickness
And these whispers in my head intensify to raspy screams asking when my skull will explode so they can breathe.
these guys are my therapy tbh.
Mikayla Marz this is therapy
Hey, I know you're here. You're strong okay? You're fucking strong.
legit best song ever written!! feeling so many unexplainable emotions right now omfg
I fucking love listening to this!
Hotel Books is my go to any time I want to take a break from metal and progressive!
Gosh darn, such a great band! If you see this, Cam, I just want you to know that you have one of the greatest writing skills in modern day.
Thats all for me. Have a good day anyone who reads this.
Micke Möller i second that
you can actually him in Facebook and he replies to you. His name in "Cam Smith". He's actually a wonderful guy too!
This band is such a unique band. I absolutely love it. I hope one day I can see them live just to see and feel the emotion in person.
When I hit the play button I am frozen. So much AGONY yet so much BEAUTY.. You speak to US. THANK YOU for giving us the opportunity to experience this.
✌💜 Lots of love
But is survival living or is survival just a placeholder for a vacant mind to cut off the threat to coincide with the soil while their blood boils?
This line gets me
I legit screamed when he said, "And darling, darling, what if you woke up too?"
Listened to this in the car with my best friend and started saying the lyrics... I got kind of emotional with it and as it got to the middle of the song I started getting louder with the lyrics and I started crying... this song... hits me...
Honestly, the first time I listened to this song I was immediately hooked. this is the song I have been looking 4 forever, the song that describes the crushing depression that I have had since the sixth grade, and it's continued for so long. It describes the excruciating pain you feel when losing your mind
3 years later and it still hits me the same way it did back then
His poetry/music has made me go deep to places of my mind that were screaming from the past mistakes that I have made ..I have felt relief from hearing this music/poetry that he has made and design.
Love all of hotel books' songs but this one hits me "the voices in my brain tell me it's all in my head"
this is like top in more-meaningful poetry version, i love hotel books
Oh my goodness...this left me speechless and full of awe...
What can I say? All I'll say, is that I can't say, how this man says, all that he says, in the passion that he gives, and the -compassion- -manifestation- emotions that he writhes.
How is this band not as famous as bmth or ptv? It's life
My school's speech team is allowing me to perform this and iatibo at a district comp!
How did it go?
yea how'd it go
It's been 4 years. How did it go???
@@steventonche1037 ...
I love the line " your not my oxygen but i breath your air"
Never related to a song more in my life, Cam you're a not just a muscian, you're an artist
Sometimes I feel sad but because I want to hyperbolize my feelings I listen to these songs and say they're so me.
I love the emotion of every single one of these songs ❤ this is true art
I'm bawling.
This i just.... I'm speechless
Goosebumps. I've never heard anything more beautiful.
No one has a voice... if no one is listening. Cuts deep
This song makes me feel more than anything else in this world.
This is no longer music or poetry,I don't know what it is but I love it.
just found out this song and I don't even know what to say
it's like a mix of being as an ocean and la dispute... oh man
It's 1:06 in the morning and this hit me.
Right in the feels
:'(
Alex R.H I agree with you it hits me deep in the heart
honestly such a great poet, hotel books has really helped after my girlfreind left me for another man
...dude.. every time I listen to Hotel Books my life changes. by feeling these feels and writing them and recording them, it helps me feel my own. it’s refreshing beyond words can say. Thank you
i just found this guy on spotify like 4 days ago ...and now its literally all ive been listening to, which is a nice transition from death metal and other random stuff o_o; this shit is deep and has meaning ..if u dont feel anything listening to this go jump in the pile of soulless bodies
lyrics of the death metal band called death is deep and has meaning. why am i even here?
Randy Strickland i feel u
Love this can't stop listening to it.💯💖
Maybe our love is just laced with lsd, cause darling I'm high on life and you're just high on me 💕💕💕 Favourite quote in life
so much emotions.
so much memories.
warning, do not listen in front of your friends..... bad news
+Matt Doby But my friends love this band lol
Markiplite 101 me too man
Or in front of your family
Matt Doby my girlfriend hanged up on me and we got into a argument cause i played this song during the call, me being aware that this song worsens her depression but not being able to take it off quick enough. i noticed as i was apologizing to her and she apologizing, us both in tears she...she was the one
HAHAAAAA
Damn, glad I stumbled onto this. Some great melody and even more amazing spoken word. Love it.
broooo, those lyrics got me real hard....
I love you and your music so so much please never stop writing
brilliance, all of his lyrics r so good! much better than meaningless pop crap they play on the radio
I got recommended this. I do not regret it. I want to die now.
Don't we all?
+Carter Gogan Eh, I normally don't, but still. we all die. What we do now doesn't affect anything when we all die :)
This isn't true, not for some. trust me friend, what we do can have an impact. it may not change the world, however, for someone out there. a friend, lover or parent, the littlest thing that you do can change someones path forever. :D
+Carter Gogan true, plus I'm just sleep deprived. its 2 AM.
I respect that cx
So I'm sitting in the hospital with my mom-she's been battling cancer for over a year, and other things for over three years-her blood work was crazy, so they put her in the Research Center. None of the doctors can tell us or her what's wrong, she's just laying there carrying on, and life has been pretty shitty the last few months....and I'm not sure what I believe but I hope everyday and that she'll be able to walk for more than 3 minutes, to eat more than 500 calories, and someone will have a game plan for us and her. This song just makes me want to cry, Momma, I love you so very much!! Please hold on....
oh my.. *gets insane goosebumps*
their best song for sure... imo ofc
Fuck dude it's been a minute (years) since I've needed to listen to these. On one hand it sucks but im also very very greatful these are still here.
I hope you're well dude.
I'm sCrEAmIng!! This song brought me to tears.
beautiful.
This song gave me goosebumps. Congrats, not much does that these days.
Honestly, at the end of every song, I feel like I am suppose to silently snap my fingers in glee. For this is poetry night at the bar music.
I’m listening to this, crying. My heart broken. I’m remembering when I was a teenager, and the hurt and pain was really just so deep. Seeing how Far I’ve come from just surviving to living. I never deserved the pain. I’m crying for the child I was. I deserved so much more, and that’s painful. I will raise my babies with Al the love I didn’t get.
Someone just recommended this too me and I'm amazed
RIght.
Last 2 lines killed me
I'm gonna go lay down
I have these voices in my brain and I created them and I hate them, but I ask them to stay. Cause I have this fixation on death, this fixation on change, this fixation on three years I grew out of pain. This fixation on sleep. This fixation on you and on me, but who could I be? I spent three years writing poems about a fixation on the past, and she told me it was worth it, because she told me it would last. But darling, I will hold my tongue as I hold you tight, cause forgetting what you think love means is my sleeping pill every night. I remember when you woke up and screamed “maybe our love is just laced with LSD, because darling, I’m high on life and you’re just high on me.” And as I tried my best to read between the lines, your lips shape words I try to interpret as lies, only to see the devil behind deep inside the details. As Lucifer found his way back into retail, my dear, he sold us a product we didn’t want to buy. But we weren’t trying to be original, we just trying to survive. The voices in my brain telling me it’s all in my head. I will sleep with one eye open but I won’t sleep until I’m dead. Cause a fair assessment of a existence is an inconsistent realist vision of selfish antics reduced to survival of the fittest defined by our ability to avoid those caring any sickness. And these whispers in my head intensify to raspy screams asking when my skull will explode so they can breathe. They know that no one has a voice when no one is listening and the violent riot of staying silent or quiet is torturous to those who need to hear something and that violence has its own sort of beauty. And you are my beauty. And you are my violent smile. And you are my violent prayer. And you’re not my oxygen but I breathe your air. ‘Cause these voices in my brain remind me of past mistakes, the beauty I found of being able to say, “Look what I went through, I survived.” But is survival living or is survival just a placeholder for a vacant mind to cut off the threat to coincide with the soil while their blood boils? ‘Cause my biggest fear was never facing death or even facing what happens after. My biggest fear was never facing anything like that. My biggest fear was waking up in that coffin with all these voices chanting a chorus of remorse, a forced abort from the course I had chosen. And now I’m laying here frozen with fear staring up at a splintering slab of wood paid for with my life savings buried beneath the earth that grew the weeds that poisoned my families feet. What if I woke up and walked back home and it was like nothing had happened? “We left your room the way you left it, we just scrubbed the blood stains out of the carpet, we just rubbed the mud remains out your pockets, we just dubbed the tough claims out of your sonnets. We just evacuated your room and hoped you would too but your spirit haunted it too long so we boarded it up moved along and watched it become a guest room. A place for the non-permanent inhabitants to exist in this home we created to raise our kid.” That was my biggest fear, finding out something like that would happen. ‘Cause the memories have come with this, only cause everything else to hurt deep inside of this dismissed feeling I feel. But sometimes you have to face the past. Maybe I’ve never faced death but if I were to walk away then what would I be? These voices in my head, what would they say and what would they see? Did I survive or am I cursed? Did I die or did I learn? What if I woke up and nothing happened? What if I never wake up? My dear, then what’s my purpose? What if I woke up and nothing happened? And darling, what if you woke up too?
"Lucifer found his way back into retail, my dear he sold us a product we didn't want to buy but we weren't trying to be original we were just trying to survive"
Years later I’m still afraid to listen to this song.
i miss you.
I feel this.. I feel it a lot.
This song still fucks me up left and right
I love Hotel Books.
this dude and garrett from silent planet need to get together and write an EP
love this guy keep it. I want more songs
I can't stop listening to this 😧👍
this is honestly my favourite one
This is the drug I've needed my whole fucking life...thank you so much
How does this only have 100,000 views?!?!?!!??!!?!??1???
too real for some people/not enough exposure.
Found my new favorite artist.
Dig my soul into this.