The male identity crisis | Fraser Smith | TEDxGlasgow
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 20 มิ.ย. 2019
- TEDxGlasgow 2019 Principal Partner #SCOTLANDISNOW'
When you hear the expression ‘man up’, what does it make you think?
Is it about being tougher? More dominant? Or putting on a brave face?
There’s continued pressure on men to live up to a masculine ideal portrayed by the entertainment industry and on social media. In response, new initiatives call for men to acknowledge their vulnerabilities and ask for help, rather than play the hero. On the flip side, other social movements stigmatise men as being wired for aggressive and predatory behaviour.
Male identity is at a crisis point.
How can men find a sense of themselves amongst such narrow and conflicting ideas of masculinity? And what impact is the male identity crisis having on men’s mental health?
Psychological counsellor, Fraser Smith, shares his research into the impact of male identity and makes a heartfelt case for us to adopt a new way of thinking about what it means to be a man in 2019.
Get Psyched
Fraser is a counselling psychology doctoral trainee at Glasgow Caledonian University. He works as a psychological counsellor at First Psychology and is the Creator of GetPsyched, an online psychology learning platform where content on psychology, mental health and therapy is developed and facilitated.
His main passion within mental health is men’s mental health and he
has developed an understanding of the mechanisms that create barriers to the development of positive mental health in men, as well as the challenges that men have in accessing therapy.
Currently, his research focuses on the lived appreciation of mental health amongst older men. This topic has led him to seek a better understanding of the concept of male identity better, how male identity is at a critical point in society, and how this may contribute to developing mental health difficulties amongst men. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx
![CAMPปลิ้น | EP.76[2/2] เดินมาสิบกว่าป่า วันนี้รู้แล้วว่าโจโฉกลัวอะไร!](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/R7Yor-t2Au0/mqdefault.jpg)
![ทัศนศึกษาโรงงานผลิตโค้ก [THAI/ENG SUB]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/M9y-TJBNem0/mqdefault.jpg)
I broke down and cried throughout the video. To all the males out there, please stay strong. If you're struggling, please just reach out to someone.
you try and they ridicule your issues and tell you to "man up"
Please take my hug. It breaks my heart to think of sweet, kind creatures that men are that are getting pushed away and dismissed. There are women out there that would lift men up when they are vulnerable and won’t place unrealistic expectations. At least that’s how I want to raise my daughter and trying to be like that myself.
🤘🔥
Jesus Christ yes you do need to MAN UP
you try and they ridicule your issues and tell you women have it worse
“It’s no longer enough to increase the options for men to seek therapy, it’s no longer enough to encourage men to talk, it’s no longer enough to simply state that toxic masculine principle should no longer be a barrier: we have to change the conversation”. Brilliant!
Well done Fraser, so true, there is much needed support for men in crisis and to prevent these crisis states
Wiggygretagail totally agree, thanks for the support
Hi all, this is Fraser here. I realised there are a lot of thoughts and questions about my talk. So I would like to invite you to ask them here and I'll respond. Thanks again for watching and engaging.
I related a lot to the stuff at 4:23. I feel despised by society, both isolated from any support and lumped together with a group I didn't choose, and whose image is defined by a small minority. Even if the amount of excessively-powerful men outnumbers that of women, the gender ratio for the rest of us (who have much more in common with eachother than our elite counterparts) is nearly 1. "Privilege" may be mostly male, but "unprilivege" is not female. More importantly, "male" is not privilege, nor the problem.
On that note, I request that you not use the term "toxic masculinity." I agree with the idea of its motte, but the phrase itself casts the masculine as perpetrators rather than victims, which is harmful on multiple levels. It repels people (many whom would most benefit from it) before they know what you're trying to talk about, robbing them of the ability to talk about it themselves. Even knowing you don't mean it that way, it can still be hurtful to hear, especially to those already feeling vulnerable (again, possibly due to the very problem); you might call it a microaggression. This is partly because (in my lived experience) it is also harnessed to silence and control men, and diverted to ever more dubious aspects.
We can argue about how apt a descriptor it is, but does that matter more than how it makes people feel (or even how effectively it spreads your message)? The idea should be called something less toxic, like "the unrealistic standards of might placed on men."
Thanks. I think men should talk to men and help one another to discover their true selves -- which many are already doing.
However, I think the reason why it's easy to demonize men, is that men don't take it personal when another male has been violent. Why do/did men let violent men ruin the reputation of the entire male populace? Why are men mostly lukewarm towards justice when a man has harmed a woman? Why do they pay lip service and even try to make excuses for criminal behavior, even as they insist it was wrong and they themselves wouldn't do it?
You have the right questions, a lot relatable. But what’s the answer, how to solve the problem? Therapy isn’t enough and prbbly not even best option always. Changing the society for this prblm is good, but who will work on it?
@@ade-oluwaspov206 yes!!! Fully agree with this! Men need to start talking to one another about their feelings and experiences. And also understand their place in the patriarchal system and how they're benefiting from it. Its not demonizing men to ask men to be aware of their own privilege. In the end, we're all fighting the same battle, that is to emancipate all of us from rigid gender roles and ideals.
@@kj1998 True!
Honestly feel like this is one of the best Tedtalks out there.
Every single point is spot on, and I like how you don't go for the easy answers of antifeminism or economic issues
This guy accurately identifies some serious problems, but his solutions are misguided. You can't fix male mental health by trying to adjust everyone's social norms, or by embracing social norms ; he paradoxically makes both arguments. Therapy is, at best, treatment for a problem without solving the root cause.
Real solutions include things like :
Fathers in the home.
Radical changes to the structure of the education system so it rewards male modes of achievement.
When society abandoned these things, outcomes for boys plummeted. An army of therapists won't solve this problem.
Agreed I’ve been going to therapy for 10 months and not much has changed tbh
@@Rawyalty220 Might help: No More Mr Nice Guy; The Rational Male
Alex Z thx for the suggestions. Yup I’ve read rational male, great book
Honestly, I had to take notes for school on this video, but I think I'll take notes of your comment too.
Truth🔥🤘
great stuff, very inspiring!
A big reason is that it's hard for men to make deep friendships. Women generally develop friendship through talking and men generally develop friendship through doing meaningful tasks together. Sports, warfare, work, travel, etc.
I never realised this. Now looking at my friends, yes, this is very much true.
Maybe a possible reason behind why it's hard for men to make deep friendships is the fact that they are conditioned to believe that things like sports, warfare, work, travel, etc. are "meaningful" and talking is not "meaningful".
This is the basis for the newest video I've created. Male friendship is a necessity.
Great talk! Everyone must watch
I knew this guy personally, he was always a stand up guy!
Much love Ken, thanks so much
He sux for logic and solutions
@POOR PIRANO did you watch the video at all? What a narrow and toxic comment you have made
@H other guy deleted their comment did you even see it? Are you so insecure that you have to yell at people on youtube comments? Grow up.
Great points I’ll have to do a video on this!
Thank you
I am a man, I grew up with only a mother and grandmother for most of my life. Because of familie reasons I had to be a sort of familie therapist and became really sensitive to other peoples emotions to "serfive". I also have ADD which makes me have bigger emotional swings then other people around me and I am just now starting to notice how that has effected my mental state. I was partly trying to chase the ideal of being strong, while not trying to be weak, and be open for everyone else. I only now notice, what this has ment for me and my identity. I felt left out a lot, because I was to hard sometimes, to soft other times. I completely lost myself and thought of suicide for a little while (never had plans, and for those who think of this, stay strong, you will get through this!).
I felt like I was an Alien, build differently then everyone else, male or female. But I can now confidently say that I am a man, I am strong, competitive and want to feel powerfull, I am also weak, forgetfull and emotional. I am now on the road to piecing together who I am, I know I am a man, and very happy to say that. However, I can be both the stereo typical and non stereotipical version of what that traditionally means, and all of that is okay.
For everyone out there, stay strong, in every way of the word. Ask for help when you have to, and go solo when you if that is the right path for you, but if you are down in a pit, reaching out to people around you can be a live saving experience!
100 percent agree with this perspective
Honestly, I never felt that I couldn't cry. I only, sometimes, don't want to, even if I feel like it.
As I contemplate my own way out...
This is truth I won’t speak
Are you doing okay today?
Stay strong my friend we are here.
This is a phenomenal message, thank you Fraser for articulating this so well,
Indeed. It truly is.
In other words as a man you are saying "STOP putting me in an impossible position where I can't be superman ALL THE TIME...let me be ME and love me enough to accept me AS I AM."
Wonderfully put, I'll try to remember that
4 seconds in and his accent is brilliant, I love it.
This is EXACTLY and TOTALLY why I am with the Man Gang, a men's mental health support group!
I am so glad this is all coming out today!!!!!! This is real, not pretence.
It's high time men were not told by culture/society that we should have a high status and calibre because it IS truly killing us!
LOL You demand high status and calibre" ??? Good way of making more men take their lives LOL. How delusional are you?
The fact that some other people are uncomfortable with me doesn't mean that I'm having an identity crisis. If you aren't comfortable with me, maybe that's your problem.
Thanks. Another good resource is the mindfulness book "30 Days to Discover Who I Am" by Harper Daniels. It's online.
I knew that Stifler would undergo a subtle transformation from the party guy to a Dostoewski-like deep thinker.
😂😂😂😂😂 perhaps my favourite comment of all time
@@GetPsychedI hope to one day understand
Its a misconception that individuals need to be a certain type of person. It's more a borderline/bipolar thinking when we live our lives judging men or women about who they should be. The real question is who is judging who. When we judge others, we are living in a fantasy that was provided to us by care givers who were not mentally well. We need to remember that we are all individuals with our own minds, bodies and emotions. Men who believe they need to be strong and dominantating is a mental illness. We still see young males running around the cities, causing issues, being loud and obnoxious and being angry when they do not get what they want. This is about accepting that we may have been living an fantasy that doesn't exist. A fantasy that is on an individuals basis. If you believe that you need to be dominantating and controlling to hitch a woman, that is an unhealthy coping strategy that doesn't exist. Men need to be individuals and learn to control anger and remember that they have a choice. We all do.
I can relate many thing he said
If you go to therapy the women in your life will never let you forget it.
We are expected to be more emotional and softer, but from my own experience and my friends, women say that they are attracted to this but why do you think there is the saying about how nice guys finish last. That we are expected to be the protector and a provider, but the current talk says that if we try to do this we are not with the times. Women are drawn to strong and confident men who make are not afraid to make moves but the latest talk and movements make us feel like if we do that, we might be labeled as toxic male. I can tell you that playing the nice and understanding guy who tries to do what the current culture is telling us is viewed as weak and not attractive. I know there are terrible men who have done terrible things. We hear you, but why when we do this we are left wanting and passed by for the those that ignore this(not talking about men who would be abusive or a predator).
I think the book "no more mister nice guy" could answer some of your question, you can find the audiobook on youtube I believe.
There's lots of hyper paranoia going around don't get sucked in to it
being nice is bare minimum.
you need skills or something that can make you more attractive.
yall care what women think about u alot meanwhile women don't give a f#%@ what yall think about them
What’s expected of a man nowadays by women and society is almost impossible. Best to just be yourself and do your best in situations. To do otherwise is to set yourself up to feel a failure leading to depression and for some suicide.
All the women in the crowd look like they are barely listening 😆😶
Male identity needs the following: land ownership without a usurious mortgage.
LOL. Nice try.
@@Rage_Harder_Then_Relax I have no idea what you mean! Are you speaking in tongue? Please make a point, provide evidence and explain.
i never liked the kam thing, ofc i knew it was a joke and i didnt get pressed- and ofc as a woman when they revolted with raw which is genuinely messed up but can we seriously stop labeling all man as this horrible person. Ofc they still exist and i get affected by those types of men but they're also human you know. Seriously its helping no one dividing the genders more.
If you're having an identity crisis, get primal. What would your role have been back before industrialization, before colonialism, before impirialism? ...back when we were connected to the land, to our community, and the raw forces of nature...when we were a part of the local ecology, where every creature knows its place and its role.
Really... How do you propose they do that? Buy a block of land and grow vegetables or pigs and chickens on it? LOL.
I cant relate to this, the fact that everyone is suggesting that if i dont cry i can't be satisfied or happy is just ridicolous.
I actually find stoic behavior better for depression. It encourages you to get out of your head and take full responsibility for yourself which I find far more helpful than going over trauma again and again and crying. I think you need a good cry sometimes but usually depression causes bad habits that's why stoic philosophy is very helpful to accept responsibility for yourself and don't blame others
I don't think the problem men are facing today is that they don't know how to cry. I think the problem is that they have no outpose.
@@cedar4539 I think crying is good for you and talking to a trusted friend is good it's healthy but I have chronic depression and I deal with it by staying in a routine up do jobs bed at certain time less internet read more etc and healthy eating is very important. I don't always win but you some times need to refocus your mind and get out of the negativity in your head like reading listening to music etc you need strategies if you are depressed.
The fact that you can't relate to this now is fine, but to reduce the issue by calling it "ridicolous" [sic], while so many are killing themselves is incredibly poor and shameful behaviour. Stop being part of the problem.
Not all men are bad, abusers or ok..I felt that ..I understand I need healing in this Area Cause HURTING ME is all I've ever experienced from men!
Completely corroborate with each and every thought shared by Fraser Smith.
It's a sad reality. Vast majority of the modern technological inventions came out of men's ingenuity and hard work. But, today we see that in the more prosperous society because of those innovative technological inventions, men are largely the victims. Men should not lose hope and develop male masculinity through individual efforts and men's support groups.
In my case, by nature, I used to be timid and less into games/sports. With an physically abusive father and a dominating wife, it only made matters worse. Developing yourself personally is better than never. So, at age 50+ with two grown up children, I strive to develop masculinity and spend lot of time and effort on Personal Development.
One thing I fixed, I moved from a high tech corporate job, to a menial low paying job. Yes, my skills are wasted, yes, my present and future can no longer be financially stable, BUT, I escaped a corporate female entitlement zone. A zone where I was a man, and nobody could see around that. A zone where I was to be held down, regardless of my skills or abilities. A zone where I was always going to take a step back to a woman for a raise or promotion. My hope is, that in their "empowerment", women today can start suffering more heart attacks, more suicides, and die 10 years younger than men. They learned nothing other than to just turn the tables on men, not to work with them, not to engage them; they deserve the hells coming to them.
Believe me, if you have the skills you are gonna have a beautiful future ahead. And I'm so glad to hear that you've discovered yourself regardless of any other matter. Best wishes to you 💙
I agree that women should be careful of what they wish for. I hate how the world is so competitive. It’s tough and I understand why so many have enough of it.
Dude you need a psychologist , you're not right in the head.
At the end of the day,the fact is"no one gives a damn,",even you are down on your knees,you have to get up and keep running,you as a man just have to keep going, literally till your last breathe,
Isn't that what Fraser is going against? Why should men have to do this, stay quiet about struggles and have to get up no matter what? And to continue 'until your last breath,' I don't believe it is a stretch to say that this is a factor in male suicides and depression. I sense bitterness in this statement, especially towards the end. It feels so lonely.
If this is how men/you view the world, is there anything I, or as a female, can do to help men be relieved of this view and be themselves rather than adhere to such thinking?
How can I help you?
@@krystalnguyen3285 with all due respect,this is the fact,I am sure you are a very good person,but no matter how sympathetic you are,society literally works that way,there is no gate or hard feeling towards women or you,but this is the truth,how you can help?be kind,be considerate,
I was more looking for support about by gender identity crisis but sure this works i guess
Should include traditional and progressive notions
This guy is very attractive 😍😍
Sadly, no one GAF until it is too far gone
I agree. Is there anything you believe would be a good way to start helping men more so less men are unable to be helped?
Therapy was one way, but on an everyday, casual basis.
@@krystalnguyen3285 no. The Overton window has passed on that, and there are too many diverging opinions to reach any common ground on anything. Idk where it goes, but in my view the ship is sinking and the few life boats are sailing away, leaving everyone else to drown. Therapy is a bandaid for systemic problems, and only aims to capitalize on the problem.
Perhaps this is being simplistic. A good start, however, would be to stop demonising men.
Really? How do you propose to do that?
Men need to do something that is against their nature. Current society either insists on it's civilians on overcoming their own nature to not suffer rather than reconstructing itself in a way that makes this insistence redundant in the first place. Many problems in the current societal order are merely symptoms of a deeper rooted problem that a simple consultation or opening up about won't fix. It is a cure for the symptoms, not an eradication of the source of such. Of course, some can be just fixed by the conventional method, for example for men who witnessed something horrible. But it takes something much greater to change for these men to not be prone to the depression in the first place, or have no reason for it. Coping mechanisms and covering up the problems of the world are a sad denial of the state things are in.
The power dynamics between men and women have changed drastically in the past century. I think we're in the process of reestablishing institutions such as marriage, family, and labor both in and out of the home. Society groomed its people into believing the world would be structured in a way that is no longer feasible. I think men as a population are struggling with purpose, value, humility, and letting go of control. Women don't have the answers either, the response overall has been to mimic the provider mentality of men, exciting the home. The removal of women's sole focus in the home, has left a gap unfilled. The family dynamic in the US has completed shifted and it's chaotic on mass scale. I think we assign blame to groups because it's easier and less convoluted to do, however, overwhelmingly it seems to be the individual that bears the brunt of the guilt and shame. I don't know what men are going to do as a whole, but I wish they'd make up their minds and get creative with it. I do know, however, that the responsibility for a solution does not fall onto women.
Don’t worry bro. I’ll be a man for you.
4:30 I worry about how women view me now. Most Guys have felt that
I would be too if I was a woman..LOL
When trying to promote male identity, it would be a good idea to absaine from using terms such as "toxic masculinity" historical or otherwise as this fellow did around 1 minute in🙄🙄🙄
If you're triggered by that, then you have a lot more you should worry about.
And he didn’t say and we don’t all have tattoos
LOL
Pretty good talk. A couple facts weren’t right, but...still a good talk.
what wasn't right?
Also keep in mind that a lot of this is his personal experience so some of it may not apply to most other people
There wouldnt be a problem with boys in education if we hired more male teachers and reverted back to the O 'level system. The data is clear, when we changed the education system in the UK to better suit girls at the cost of boys the divergence occurred. Prior to the GCSE system, girls and boys did equally well in school.
Follow up on this please, anyone suggest content for me?
You bring up many of the substantive issues (whether you realize it or not) but the idea that changing the definition or concept of male identity isn’t the solution makes no sense.
The solution is precisely that, we have traditionally had too rigid of a definition of masculinity and that needs to change.
You mention status growing being defined making other men/boys “fear” you, you mention footballers being idols/gods, and James Bond on TV. These all fit into one singular narrow traditional male identity of the “tough” aggressive man. We need to greatly expand and in effect change our definition of masculinity to go far beyond what you describe as the vision of masculinity that our society and culture presented to you growing up. (Sports and some of the Bond/action hero persona should be totally fine, the fear bit and obviously the casual misogyny of earlier Bond films are certainly problematic tho)
Boys and men need to feel free to define “masculinity” for themselves without fear of judgement. We need to feel comfortable not identifying masculine if that’s what we want. The expectations of matching some sort of idealized “man” are at the root of the issue, just as it is for women with beauty standards or the traditional societal pressures to “start a family” and “make a home”.
People need to be free to define their identities for themselves, and we all need social support systems around us that accept us for who we are and give us tough love when we need it.
Wow, I wish more people could see your comment. Very beautifully written. Thank you
Someone needs to teach this guy conditional probability and Bayes’ theorem. His stats knowledge is shite.
he looks like Jason Statham
Yea both looks same and handsome
Modern day sophistry.
Not all Men want to be more emotional, men want to gain a sense of meaning in their lives. I appreciate he is trying to help but he has shown no studies or statistics to validate his speech, he simply re-enforced the notion that traditional masculine norms are toxic, this was one of the worst ted talks I've ever heard.
Reclaiming masculinity 🤘🔥
Some of them are to be fair. If you don't want to be emotional, don't. It's forcing other people to not show their emotions when they want to that's toxic. Or to show them when they don't too I suppose.
I'll agree that bigger problem men face todat is a lack of purpose.
@@cee4049 The reason men must control their emotions is that its, you know, a requirement for civilization. Its when men fail at this that catastrophes happen.
I agree so much with this but at the same time I feel like this completely ignored who “society” is here. He keeps referring to abstract society and “how men are viewed” im passive voice as though it’s women and men equally contributing to this pressure on men when in fact it’s mostly men putting this on other men. It’s men who are making Superhero movies, it’s men that tell other men not to cry, it’s (like he said) men that make each other feel like their worth comes from how much they can make other men fear them.
6:31
Alright I’m gonna head out.
This guy has identified a real problem but lost me on the “fathers come in different genders”.
His prospective is coming from a woman’s prospective, something that men naturally don’t resonate with.
And that'll be the problem.
A male identity crisis exists with overthinking , a woman or female trying to make a male and or man ve too simulative with a male or man such as in a dance contestiancial performance, a woman or female would be categorized as a parasite wanting to act out a vampire supposed way of controlling a person resulting the fact a character trying to be involved in reality and acting out characters of supposed characters
..call a psychologist for help if a person is married to a person trying to resonate with characters too profusely ?..possibly....Depo
Do you understand English? I don't think you do.....or you're drunk.
Most caused by some women. They don't know men, how they think, feel. Men maybe are different but only slightly, still are human, has the same emotions, can be sensitive too.
Part of the conversation should include the feminization of our society and culture.
What would be the masculine culture then? I a woman so I don't know what you mean. Do you mean like hunting your own food? A sense of purpose?
@@emilyb5278, Please keep in mind that I made this statement at least a year ago, but I will try to interact with you on the subject the best I can. My argument is not really for us to revert to a masculine culture, but to recognize the complimentary nature of the two, rather than the negation of one as to give prominence to the other. The problem with this cultural tide that we have come to call, "feminism," is that it not only drowns masculinity but feminism as well. And it's not only women driving this tide, men are also just as much to blame. Some men have pushed for it, while others have abandoned their responsibilities.
The examples of how this plays out could go on and on forever, but I will offer a few. Western society has become softened to the point that a man can be fired for so much as merely complimenting a woman. We now expect, no, we DEMAND our nanny state government to take care of us, even when we are strong, healthy and able. Boys and girls are both suffering a gender crisis such as has never been experienced in the history of the world. More and more young adults actually favor limited speech and want to be insulated from so much as a disagreement. Children hardly have enough courage to get out of bed in the morning and have to visit a psychologist just to put one foot in front of the other. Our government wants to regulate everything anyone does right down to the most minuscule detail to protect their citizens from every conceivable and imaginable harm, from a child's lemonade stand to the type of tree one can plant in their front yard.
Again, I'm not against women, nor am I against femininity, but we are experiencing a serious crisis.
@@theden-jimdill7037 valied points.
@@theden-jimdill7037 Maybe if you've been in the shoes of minority groups before, you would understand better why we need laws to protect us. Masculinity and femininity exists in everyone, man, women, and gender-non conforming people. No one is drowning out masculinity, we're just expanding our definition and perspective of it.
I disagree. If men are stronger, more logical, etc then they should be that physical pillar of strength that their wives and children look to for safety and security when the chaos of the world is happening around them. Just in the same way wives should be that pillar of rest for when her husband is tired from working so hard and needs a back rub, foot rub, hugs and kisses and encouragement to do it all over again.
I believe both husbands and wives should go to therapy individually for their own separate mental health, at the very least once a month. Or if they're part of a faith community, be active and find a trusted faith based therapist and counselor to help them through the hard stuff individually.
Respect and consideration for each other isn't hard, but for reasons that I don't completely know...men are struggling to stand grounded. I suspect it has to do with growing up fatherless and having no men around to plant good roots into them and pour into them the confidence in their manhood that they truly need and that their mother cannot give them no matter how much she tries.
I wish every man could be saved but it's really survival of the fittest out here. A lot of men won't make it and historically it's always been that way. Men need a lot more nurturing and resilience training than women do. We grow accustomed to pain every since our first menstrual cycle and when we birth children and whenever our feelings are hurt and we want to cry about every little thing.
Males are different and they're supposed to be.
Not so different where they are literally killing themselves. Your simplicity is almost comical. Most of these men are single so you're off track in your first paragraph already. And those who are married or have a partner, it's usually that partner who isn't the helpful one....like your opinion. They just pile on what the rest of society has thrown at them. Obviously there are several reasons why men are struggling. This is just one of the reasons. High divorce rates and family court systems are another.
kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk
Men come in different genders? 😄 Maybe that's part of the problem, identity crisis
The problem is the framework of society is gynocentric. Their limited knowledge and perspective of men which is heard more the the knowledge and perspective of men that men have is the root of the problem.
It isn't men's fault for breaking in a cultural environment that goes out of it's way to do the very opposite of favoring them, favoring women instead, and normalizing it while pretending men aren't second class citizens in their eyes.
Who are you talking about when you say "they" or "their"?
Women and the powerful above that direct which way society goes.
@@boblotoldo3051 But I thought men were strong? They beat up women all the time and you don't think that's enough? LOL
Very important topic of which this gentleman added nothing
feedback?
The solution is an all boys school that incorporates violence, speed, and momentum into the learning curriculum.
LOL.
Aside from a couple of them, all traitors aka tavaajaans
If you read this do 10 Pushups
Men are being systematically destroyed. It seems intentional.
Sure...they want the human race to die off. 🙄
This is patriarchy's agenda.
Sorry but men don’t come in different genders.
Facts
Well I hang out with the immigrant community, you are really hitting them hard with this toxic masculinity thing. It’s like you hate their culture with this type of Ted splaining .
Every he's concerned about the way men seen is the very point of movements proof talk about women the same way or address negatives about them
Women : we want you to show emotions
You can cry , you can be scared of something bla bla bla..
When a man cry
The same women are like
Yuck🤮🤮🤢🤢
He is weak I want a Masculine man
Then why are you with them douchey. You CAN walk away right?
This is bollocks.. the link between suicides and not talking about your issues has been proven to be smaller than most people think. The main reason is men's inbuilt purpose as a provider and protector has been lost. Maybe it needed to be lost, but nothing has replaced it. Feminizing men does not give them a sense of purpose, we are not women and trying to be like them doesn't work. The answers are definitely more complicated than therapy..
sounds like someone needs to go to therapy
@@ash4952 typical response, with nothing to add or say.
Suicide victims don't talk about their issues before it's too late in general either Men or Women. Also, the stereotypes of men being the provider and protector is not gone and it's damaging for *Other* men.
I think he's not talking about feminizing men, but rather humanizing men. People are different from one another and men are different from one another. Plus, mental health and therapy are more complicated than people think and that's sad.
@@SantosSimeon you seem to ignore that a percentage of who we are is instinct, unless you really believe we are born a blank slate regardless of gender. That would make us the only living thing without instinct, where everything we are is learnt. Men have been feminised, they have to fit in with women's behaviour rather than the other way round as we believe that is progress. Men take their lives at a 4:1 ratio.. this isn't due to not talking about their feelings, although agreed it may help stop the act itself, it is not the cause.
@@dh1474 Yep you are the reason men are behind LOL....Well your attitude more so.
This dude should add more glute days to his gym routine. Other parts of him look great already
Lets face it women have it harder in life men are just looking for attention
Sounds like you are barely human at all, you didn't listen at all
Facts
@@andreylikhovidov5140 fiction
@@theentity5201 FACTS!!!
@@andreylikhovidov5140 FICTION!!!
This video is important but I wish he didn't peddle all the other radical feminists BS like the "male privilege", "toxic masculinity", and the "wage gap'"
@@cedar4539 Ok fair enough. On that note, can you give me an example of toxic femininity?
@@cedar4539 Interesting. So toxic masculinity is something men can do but toxic femininity is something that is done to women?
Do you not have an example when WOMEN express femininity in a toxic way?