My ex-husband met the elders regarding abusing me. During his meeting he told them about his indicredtions with prostitutes. They put him on private reproof but left it up to him to tell me, eventually he did. None of them, felt the need to have a meeting with both of us to ensure that I was aware, none checked to see how I was. Later, when I brought it up in shepherding call, I was told that as long as I had sex with him after finding out, it could no longer be used as grounds for divorce. This was a "rule" that I wasn't aware of. After more abuse, affairs and yeast infections, I finally walked away from my 7 year marriage. The elders came to my home and tried to convince me to stay because "it would bring reproach on Jehovah's name", I didn't have "enough proof" he was cheating and my separation and divorce would be "unscriptual" and lastly, there were sisters who endured more than I did but they stayed with their husbands. That was the last straw. I left the marriage and the organization and never looked back.
Between your husband's infidelities and the infections he passed on to you, the elders keeping you out of the loop, denying you support and counseling you to endure more, your story covers nearly every form of abuse I can think of at the moment. Spiritual, emotional, physical, sexual, mental, etc. You have shown your strength in standing up for yourself and getting out of that toxic life. I am so glad for you that you're out! 👏👏👏
June Junie22 said it all. That is absolutely despicable what those "loving shepherds" and your ex put you through!! So glad you escaped with your health and sanity!
Ex JW Diaries Exactly👍I know it’s ridiculous 🤷🏼♀️how are two people suppose to know one another when they go on these chaperoned dates all the time there’s no privacy. After you get married is not the time to get to know this person. There is nothing wrong with getting together with a group of friends every once in a while but not all the time. This is why I never married into the organization I was nearly engaged to a brother I never knew what happened to him after I got disfellowshipped.
If a young sister finds out her husband is a killer, she will be faced with a terrible situation, her husband could be sentenced to life in prison while she will never be able to go on with her life and remarry!! How crazy is that!!😵
Abuse ALWAYS escalates. Intermittent periods of happiness provide hope that things will change, but the cycle repeats. Being a victim to a bully feeds the imbalance. Silence and shame are the weapons a bully uses. Don’t teach your children that this behavior is acceptable.
I recently left for all of these marriage rules! I'm young (19, going on 20) and got married so I would have the ability to live with my partner and get out of a bad home environment. I did think he really cared about me, and we were on the same page with problems with the organization. I thought we'd get married and fade together, and he did a total 180. After 3 months of abuse, I ditched him and the organization all together. Your videos and others have brought me so much comfort!! This community is exactly what I've needed after losing everything I've ever known because of the organization
well I am very sorry about what happened to you and it makes me happy to know my videos are doing good for people. Speak up speak out and never let abuse go on!!! You are worthy of so much better
16:40 Wally, they don't want to use the word rape because in their minds, the problem is not the forcing. The problem is the nature of the acts - "perversions". They only mention forcing to establish that the one being forced is innocent of the sin. If a husband was forcing his wife to have vanilla, Watchtower-approved sexual intercourse, then she would have no scriptural grounds for divorce and they wouldn't consider it rape because in their twisted worldview they call sex the "marriage due" - the wife *owes it* to her husband so scripturally she is not in a position to refuse. The worse that the elders will say of the husband is that he's not treating his wife tenderly or with consideration. And they'll probably counsel the wife to be more submissive and compliant with his sexual needs.
Many do!! When you start talking to other exwitnesses and they are asking about people still in, you realize there were more crappy unhappy couples than there ever were people who were happy in their marriage. My husband is awesome, kind loving and respectful! We left together in 2019, and have always had a wonderful marriage, 38 years. Every meeting the COBE would ask him how are you? He always said fantastic! That jerk hated when he said it. He and his wife were miserable so I get it, 😆.
@@exjehovahswitness let me also say, my oldest sister was raped by my mom's 4th husband. They were both baptized in the early 70's, the END WAS COMING!! She told the elders. They told my mom it was my 14 year old sisters fault because she was too cute. At their urging, my mom kicked her out...child sexual abuse was not adultery, marriage was more important! 2 years later my next sister also now 14, told her teacher she was being raped. Her teacher was a mandatory reporter. Child protective services came to the door. Told my mom leave the man or lose your kids. She left him, but man was she pissed!! She had to get a job!! Ugh. She eventually quit meetings because of new smoking rules. To this day she denies that he did what he did to all 5 of her daughters.
@@exjehovahswitness yep. And I stayed in and raised my kids in the religion for 5 decades, because 'Armageddon'. What woke me up in 2019 was their lies on their CSA policies
@@Sunshine_AK I’m so glad you and your husband got out together. It is my hope my husband will wake up, too. Are your children out? If not, how do you deal with it?
The JW position on divorce is one of those areas that really highlight their unreasonable, legalistic, pharisaic nature. A spouse can commit all manner of serious abuses - murdering the children; attempting to murder the other mate; or battering them to the point that they end up in the hospital ICU - and the innocent spouse still doesn't have legitimate grounds for divorce. Only the act of having sex with someone else is grounds for divorce. Essentially, the JW view of marriage reduces it to nothing more than a contract about sex since it can only be broken by illegitimate sex. Disgusting!
So from some of those articles it seems they assume an abuser is an unbeliever, but my father was a believer and was still abusive, but in the end of all of it even though my mother was told by elders she couldn't divorce my dad, she cheated on him so she could leave him, of course she was disfellowshiped and made to seem like an evil jezabel. She divorced my dad and never went back to the kingdom hall, and I never blamed her once even when my father and step-mother where threatening to send me to live with her because she was now disfellowshiped and worldly, trying to convince me she was bad. And when I was finally shipped off I was happy about it, but I never told my father that.
@@exjehovahswitness Listen man, it's still just your opinion. If you get to know a true Jehovah's witness like me, then don't post videos containing bull.
@@malakaihernandez2235 true jehovahs witneses wouldn't be watching apostate material. True jws would tell the elders about watching this. Just saying. No disrespect intended .
Thank you so much for your videos. You're extremely entertaining, and I appreciate your thoughts. My mother became a witness shortly after her and my father had married. Given that my dad identified as an atheist, I'm sure you can appreciate how interesting a situation that made for a kid growing up. Thankfully, I was never baptized and decided to make my own way in academia. I hope we have a chance to talk one day. Until then, keep up the great work!
What about the 2 witness rule? How does that work? What if one spouse says they're being abused but the other spouse denies it? I've witnessed elders, flat out, call a woman a liar when she was telling the truth about a problem in her marriage. The situation wasn't concerning abuse but the elders immediately believed the husband and threatened the wife with disfellowshiping. Well, until I (an eavesdropping child at the time) provided physical proof and said, "How dare you come into my mother's house and call her a liar!"
If it's the wife that goes to the elders the husband has the option to be present at any meeting with the wife (the wife is not given the same option). They ask about the abuse in front of the abuser which is completely wrong. If the husband denies it or if she's too intimidated or scared of retaliation they then read scriptures about the evils of lying and tell her to keep quiet and obey. The only way the husband is ever punished by jw's is if he admits the abuse or maybe if it's public (arrested, tried and convicted). I wish I could say this was the exception but it is the norm in cases of abuse.
When I complained to one elder about my mental and emotional abuse he responded that his father treated his mother "like a dog " so he didn't see what I was complaining about. I was horrified. His father was not a witness. What does your father being an abusive a$$hol€ have to do with me? Misogyny, disrespect, unqualified to counsel anyone.
Wow Walley!!!!!! You look absolutely fabulous. Beautiful 🐈 😻 cat too. Like 👍the lemon 🍋 water 💧 too. Glad to see you having self care. You are very precious. Such a sweetheart 💕 💖. Thanks for doing what you are doing 👏..
Really good subject to make a video on my dude. Such an under appreciated problem in the JWs. It touched my family personally and I know pretty much everyone knew someone in this situation. There was this guy in our cong who couldn’t get remarried and was in his mid 40’s just so lonely and really wanted a family so he was really nice to all us kids. He was one of the nicest people I knew and it just broke my heart.
@@tessleonhart8126 Listen bud, Jehovah's witness are very nice people. I know that most marriages are actually very happy in the JW. What I'm Telling you is not an opinion, but a fact.
@@xsamitt that was the hold elders had over the congregation, guilt, guilt and more guilt and of course they would enjoy hearing all about the juicy stuff that they probably weren’t getting
Never been married always thanked god for that but I was told by a friend of mine who's a atheist that I needed to thank myself cause I saw a abusive man and wouldn't except that which is true. I never wanted my daughter to see me being abused so I left and even though I tried to work things out he kept putting his hands on me abuse is abuse I just refused to ever put myself in a situation like that ever again. Been a single parent for 14 years now only 33 but building my strength getting in the best shape of my life
This is a very serious topic. I remember this woman that was studying and her husband was a non believer. He would beat her for going to meetings. I was a 10 year old boy when we were taking her back home after an evening meeting. She was terrified but was told not to leave him. The grown sisters in the car pulled up to the curb and just let her out. I felt like they were throwing her into the Roman colosseums center full of lions. It was a very empty feeling for a little boy to be unable to do anything. I was thinking about the skit you did with the Parking Attendant and Jehovah. "If a sister is severely abused and her life threatened by her JW husband and she decided to divorce and remarry what should be done?" Parking Attendant "DEATH!" Jehovah Parking Attendant "Sounds a little harsh but I can see it may be fare to kill him." Jehovah "Not him! Death for her for remarrying. She's an unrepentant adultress!" 😢 😭 How despickable Watchtower rules are.
it is so crazy how they do not care about protecting members and i feel this is anohter example that does not get talked about as much as child safeguarding does
@@exjehovahswitness I feel they want abused wives to stay in the marriage because they want to appear wholesome by not having divorces. Another "Sweep it under the rug" song and dance. They only said "as long as it's bearable" to guilt them to stay together. But also so Watchtower wouldn't be liable if the wife got paralyzed or murdered. "We told them they could separate or divorce." Tawkin outta both sides of their mouths!
I was married to a JW. After I was baptized……. What a confusing person he was…the marriage was mind F$&!k from the very beginning… I thought the confusion and depression came from the physically abused he endured by father when he was a child. Now I believe it was the religion all along or both….He was never satisfied and every year around his birthday, he would start acting weird… he left me several times and wanted a divorce but couldn’t because he didn’t have grounds. After several public reproofs & DF we divorced after nine years….It’s clear now that I’m away from this Gawd awful cult that I believe he was hunted by FOG….his mom also wanted him to be a ministerial servant and constantly talked about Jehovah & Armageddon is near…. It was exhausting…
Sooooo apropos, so stuck, they put me here through their years (& his) of daily mental abuse.. freeing myself would have mixed blessing/curse for both of us now.
I get the feeling from reading the scriptures that they were written to people at the beginning of a new faith who were generally assumed to be well-intentioned people. I get the very same feeling reading corresponding parts in the Koran. Sadly, we know that this is not the case and many people in religion commit evil in a pro-active way. I think another thing we shouldn’t lose sight of is the fact that many women abuse scripture and congregational procedure for their own advantage too.
My mom ended up having an affair with her coworker to be able to get divorced through Watchtower rules. Of course she was disfellowshipped, but even then the elders tried to counsel her out of divorce, because my dad didn't want to accept it. My dad was physically and verbally abusive, and an alcoholic, but they still treated her adultery as more of a crime. It was not the first time in my mom's (at that time) young life that the elders had counseled her to endure abuse. Up until then, my mom was the most virtuous person I knew. You never would've expected her to commit adultery with how straight-laced and devout she was. They treated my mom like crap after that, but I'm grateful she found the strength to go through that to get us out. Of course, then the legal courts gave dad religious custody of us. But by the time I was legally allowed to choose my religion, I was awake and ready to leave. Due to the adultery, I think my dad would've been able to remarry. He had a couple talking relationships with older ladies (his age--probably not a huge shock to say my parents are 14 years apart, so he was already much older when they divorced) at some point, but he didn't want to remarry so obviously nothing ever became of those friendships. I have to admit, I'm glad no other women had to be subjected to being married to my dad and suffering the elders' counsel.
I love your content and manner of delivery. And I would never condone any of watchtower's shit, however, I would say that at the time these articles were written, marital rape was not considered a crime legally. Also, homosexual sex with another person did not constitute grounds for divorce in the divorce courts themselves. Watchtower falling back on the lame excuse that in lands where child abuse reporting is not mandated they don't need to report has been completely in line with their practice of only doing whatever is 'legally' required or established already eg. the issues you mentioned. Of course they feel free to disregard Caesar when a matter threatens to hit them in the pocket, and this is what usually forces a brighter flash of light in regard to doctrine and policies. Best wishes from the UK.
Many brothers know the loophole. They just have to bang another chick, tell the elders on themselves, get divorced and be disfellowshipped for a year, and then they get reinstated and remarry with no problems. 🤦🏻♀️
Hello from the UK. Here's something to think about Do please get hold of a copy of DOOMSDAY DECEPTION - the rise and fall of the Watchtower Society (published amazon August 2021) which tells all. Based on more than 50 years investigative journalism and experience of a former JW. Soon after it was published the Watchtower Society removed Pastor Russell's graveside pyramid monument. The book also deals with the Watchtower Society's rapidly shrinking membership as millions of JW's around the world are waking up to reality.
10:04 By that same reasoning - the mate being put to death under the OT law, thus freeing the innocent spouse to remarry - shouldn't murder also be grounds for divorce?
Using these quotes/articles/teachings, I call on anyone who knows of a woman/man who being a JW has died under domestic violence circumstances to hold the WTBTS legally liable. These teachings create the toxic criminal environment that now reigns supreme in this horrible religion. There is a Sister who came to me a couple of years ago with the complaint that certain Elders would counsel Her on how to treat the husband so that he doesn’t beat and abuse her and the children; that SHE (!!!) was causing the abuse. IMAGINE!!!
Hi there. Enjoyed this presentation fully, and agree with it completely. It’s obviously written by MEN oblivious of today’s realities. I hope the latest JW generation pays no attention whatsoever to these nonsensical words. Your activism is superb! Thanks, thanks, thanks!!!
Legal term for rape is: "with violence"! As far as wt is concerned "the man being the head of his wife" means to most believers that he O W N S his wife; instead of a couple(the two become as one flesh) being equally yoked!
“UNBEARABLE” abuse. How can one even write that? Meaning one is too weak to endure the abuse, or one can no longer stand the abuse. No matter what way you look at it it’s wrong bc ANY abuse is wrong. Wrong. Wrong. WRONG!
🤦🏽♀ This one reminds me of how WT successfully redefined forced in my mind as not really forced. I used that word on Reddit about a story I heard about a sister that divorced her husband because he 'forced' a type of relations that at the time you could divorce for in JW land. It was told to me so casually. Also, I am sure I heard that word forced many times as just normal behavior for heads of households (men). I came back to Reddit to an onslaught of That's Grape!!! How dare you! You are horrible! (not exact words) Maybe it was. IDK, because I got the gist that she wanted to divorce him and used it as a spiritual excuse. I heard it in the 90s or 00s, it happened in the early 70s. Also, the only word you could use with the elders and other JWs was forced, like the articles you read. I guess you had to be there hearing the story from my aunt. I'm glad to get that straight in my head, however it was like getting schooled by my narc dad. Ex-jws tend to blame themselves and each other, just as we were trained by WT. No questions, just AARRRGH! YOU! I really didn't mean to say that word, and now it is a trigger. Thanks ex-jw Reddit. uggh.
@@exjehovahswitness ohhh! Well, thanks for responding. The incident makes me feel real bad on multiple counts. I need to keep it in my to-do list with therapist. Got other things RN. Thanks again!
You did more in the first 2.5 minutes of your video for domestically abused women than the society has done in DECADES for the women in that organization.
I never thought masturbation was such a big deal. Even if the Hand got pregnant the Hand Baby would be raised by it's Dad and Hand Mom. That is of course if the Dad cut the Hand Mom out of his life. 😂
There right now. My sexually abusive ex was an elder and all that could be said for consolation was for me to be a good wife and go back to him. Now of course he’s on good terms with MY family and everyone cuz he still attends but I’ll be booted once I move on 🙃🤡💩
@@exjehovahswitness Thank you! My daughter and I are doing well on our own and thriving now 😊 I really appreciate your videos and the humor and lightheartedness.
You were a good example for your daughter to not put up with abusers ! You should be proud of yourself . If your daughter cares about your ex don’t make the mistake of bad mouthing him . She has to make up her own mind about his behavior. My mom did that and because I has a slightly better relationship with him than she did ( BTW he was a horrible parent and I knew it then too) , it caused some problems
I think you missed something. Yes there are situations as you did talk about. The real problem is that the forbid oral or anal sex. Reading between the lines the make some way to excuse to have oral or anal sex if the husband fores the wife.
@JW Thoughts Tanks for answering! Would be great if you could do an other video on the subject. Gives the woman some excuse to engage in practices like oral or anal sex because she can say she is forced to engage. Is somehow a bit like with blood transfusion, if authority's force one by a curt destitution then it is no problem to take a transfusion, so it is here in Austria.
Listen man, we all have our own opinions on what we think. Everyone I know who stayed a Jehovah's witness is happily married. Well actually just the people who wants to be married. Hope you have a good day :)
JW’s like to keep a lid on the fact they have a LOT of marriage problems within the cult. We’ve had talks on the circuit level on the “Giving Attention to the needs of the circuit” at past assemblies in Romeoville outside of Chicago.
![ILLSLICK X YOUNGOHM - We're The same [Official Video]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/yUJNkobYR0E/mqdefault.jpg)
My ex-husband met the elders regarding abusing me. During his meeting he told them about his indicredtions with prostitutes. They put him on private reproof but left it up to him to tell me, eventually he did. None of them, felt the need to have a meeting with both of us to ensure that I was aware, none checked to see how I was.
Later, when I brought it up in shepherding call, I was told that as long as I had sex with him after finding out, it could no longer be used as grounds for divorce. This was a "rule" that I wasn't aware of.
After more abuse, affairs and yeast infections, I finally walked away from my 7 year marriage. The elders came to my home and tried to convince me to stay because "it would bring reproach on Jehovah's name", I didn't have "enough proof" he was cheating and my separation and divorce would be "unscriptual" and lastly, there were sisters who endured more than I did but they stayed with their husbands.
That was the last straw. I left the marriage and the organization and never looked back.
Between your husband's infidelities and the infections he passed on to you, the elders keeping you out of the loop, denying you support and counseling you to endure more, your story covers nearly every form of abuse I can think of at the moment. Spiritual, emotional, physical, sexual, mental, etc. You have shown your strength in standing up for yourself and getting out of that toxic life. I am so glad for you that you're out! 👏👏👏
@@junejunie2284 thank you for your words.
June Junie22 said it all. That is absolutely despicable what those "loving shepherds" and your ex put you through!! So glad you escaped with your health and sanity!
@Imani Ife - how did they justify reproving him privately after he revealed his indiscretions with prostitutes? -- I'm so confused.
thats honestly so disgusting, i hope youre healing
So much truth! Results of rushed marriages by people who barely know each other and barely know themselves.
EX JW Diaries.
👌👍👍🙋♀️💔😣
@@sparklecanada0112 Be quiet.
Ex JW Diaries Exactly👍I know it’s ridiculous 🤷🏼♀️how are two people suppose to know one another when they go on these chaperoned dates all the time there’s no privacy. After you get married is not the time to get to know this person. There is nothing wrong with getting together with a group of friends every once in a while but not all the time. This is why I never married into the organization I was nearly engaged to a brother I never knew what happened to him after I got disfellowshipped.
THE TRUTH, THE WHOLE TRUTH...NOTHING BUT THE TRUTH!!!
If a young sister finds out her husband is a killer, she will be faced with a terrible situation, her husband could be sentenced to life in prison while she will never be able to go on with her life and remarry!! How crazy is that!!😵
yup!
They have sex in prison too! 😂
Abuse ALWAYS escalates. Intermittent periods of happiness provide hope that things will change, but the cycle repeats. Being a victim to a bully feeds the imbalance. Silence and shame are the weapons a bully uses. Don’t teach your children that this behavior is acceptable.
I recently left for all of these marriage rules! I'm young (19, going on 20) and got married so I would have the ability to live with my partner and get out of a bad home environment. I did think he really cared about me, and we were on the same page with problems with the organization. I thought we'd get married and fade together, and he did a total 180. After 3 months of abuse, I ditched him and the organization all together. Your videos and others have brought me so much comfort!! This community is exactly what I've needed after losing everything I've ever known because of the organization
well I am very sorry about what happened to you and it makes me happy to know my videos are doing good for people. Speak up speak out and never let abuse go on!!! You are worthy of so much better
The elders could actively put abuse victims in danger by telling their abuser that they came forward about the abuse! This is all so disturbing.
there is so much messed up in these rules this video could have been a few hours long
Exactly ! 😧
@@akatheheretic3014 be quiet.
@@malakaihernandez2235 Excuse Me !? 🤔
@@akatheheretic3014 3 likes for saying excuse me? Now I know you have multiple accounts, lol.
Great video! The amount of control elders have over people is crazy! Most of their marriages are jacked up too!!!
YEAH it is nuts that they get so much artificial power
@@exjehovahswitness only because we allowed it
Misery loves company!
16:40 Wally, they don't want to use the word rape because in their minds, the problem is not the forcing. The problem is the nature of the acts - "perversions". They only mention forcing to establish that the one being forced is innocent of the sin. If a husband was forcing his wife to have vanilla, Watchtower-approved sexual intercourse, then she would have no scriptural grounds for divorce and they wouldn't consider it rape because in their twisted worldview they call sex the "marriage due" - the wife *owes it* to her husband so scripturally she is not in a position to refuse. The worse that the elders will say of the husband is that he's not treating his wife tenderly or with consideration. And they'll probably counsel the wife to be more submissive and compliant with his sexual needs.
Good point.Rape is about violence , it's not about a certain kind of sex. That's a very basic difference they don't seem to understand.
Exactly
Many do!! When you start talking to other exwitnesses and they are asking about people still in, you realize there were more crappy unhappy couples than there ever were people who were happy in their marriage. My husband is awesome, kind loving and respectful! We left together in 2019, and have always had a wonderful marriage, 38 years. Every meeting the COBE would ask him how are you? He always said fantastic! That jerk hated when he said it. He and his wife were miserable so I get it, 😆.
38 years! nice work! yeah witnesses do not like when people are happy
@@exjehovahswitness let me also say, my oldest sister was raped by my mom's 4th husband. They were both baptized in the early 70's, the END WAS COMING!! She told the elders. They told my mom it was my 14 year old sisters fault because she was too cute. At their urging, my mom kicked her out...child sexual abuse was not adultery, marriage was more important! 2 years later my next sister also now 14, told her teacher she was being raped. Her teacher was a mandatory reporter. Child protective services came to the door. Told my mom leave the man or lose your kids. She left him, but man was she pissed!! She had to get a job!! Ugh. She eventually quit meetings because of new smoking rules. To this day she denies that he did what he did to all 5 of her daughters.
what the flying flock of seagulls! that is horrible
@@exjehovahswitness yep. And I stayed in and raised my kids in the religion for 5 decades, because 'Armageddon'. What woke me up in 2019 was their lies on their CSA policies
@@Sunshine_AK I’m so glad you and your husband got out together. It is my hope my husband will wake up, too. Are your children out? If not, how do you deal with it?
The JW position on divorce is one of those areas that really highlight their unreasonable, legalistic, pharisaic nature. A spouse can commit all manner of serious abuses - murdering the children; attempting to murder the other mate; or battering them to the point that they end up in the hospital ICU - and the innocent spouse still doesn't have legitimate grounds for divorce. Only the act of having sex with someone else is grounds for divorce. Essentially, the JW view of marriage reduces it to nothing more than a contract about sex since it can only be broken by illegitimate sex. Disgusting!
So from some of those articles it seems they assume an abuser is an unbeliever, but my father was a believer and was still abusive, but in the end of all of it even though my mother was told by elders she couldn't divorce my dad, she cheated on him so she could leave him, of course she was disfellowshiped and made to seem like an evil jezabel. She divorced my dad and never went back to the kingdom hall, and I never blamed her once even when my father and step-mother where threatening to send me to live with her because she was now disfellowshiped and worldly, trying to convince me she was bad. And when I was finally shipped off I was happy about it, but I never told my father that.
That was really quite disturbing. The rules around marriage as a JW put me off getting married at all.
yeah these rules are nutty
@@exjehovahswitness nope.
They’re forced to rush into marriage because everyone wants to get laid. And the dating pool is terribly minuscule. 😐
yeah that is another good point! having these stupid rules and then marriyng at 18
This.
@@exjehovahswitness Listen man, it's still just your opinion. If you get to know a true Jehovah's witness like me, then don't post videos containing bull.
@@malakaihernandez2235 true jehovahs witneses wouldn't be watching apostate material. True jws would tell the elders about watching this. Just saying. No disrespect intended .
@@blahblah2blahblah260 You didn't even say anything. Jehovah Witnesses are actually very nice people. JW thoughts however is a rude person.
In the event that an abuse might become unbearable...Wow. Hearing this was unbearable.
Thank you so much for your videos. You're extremely entertaining, and I appreciate your thoughts. My mother became a witness shortly after her and my father had married. Given that my dad identified as an atheist, I'm sure you can appreciate how interesting a situation that made for a kid growing up. Thankfully, I was never baptized and decided to make my own way in academia. I hope we have a chance to talk one day. Until then, keep up the great work!
What about the 2 witness rule? How does that work? What if one spouse says they're being abused but the other spouse denies it? I've witnessed elders, flat out, call a woman a liar when she was telling the truth about a problem in her marriage. The situation wasn't concerning abuse but the elders immediately believed the husband and threatened the wife with disfellowshiping. Well, until I (an eavesdropping child at the time) provided physical proof and said, "How dare you come into my mother's house and call her a liar!"
yeah that is how things would go I guess when you take the bible literally
If it's the wife that goes to the elders the husband has the option to be present at any meeting with the wife (the wife is not given the same option). They ask about the abuse in front of the abuser which is completely wrong. If the husband denies it or if she's too intimidated or scared of retaliation they then read scriptures about the evils of lying and tell her to keep quiet and obey. The only way the husband is ever punished by jw's is if he admits the abuse or maybe if it's public (arrested, tried and convicted). I wish I could say this was the exception but it is the norm in cases of abuse.
When I complained to one elder about my mental and emotional abuse he responded that his father treated his mother "like a dog " so he didn't see what I was complaining about. I was horrified. His father was not a witness. What does your father being an abusive a$$hol€ have to do with me? Misogyny, disrespect, unqualified to counsel anyone.
The 11th Commandment:
Thou shall not covet your neighbors dog! 😂
Omg lol
Hahaha! The unkown laws of god!
Loving the kitty.
he is the best!
Wow Walley!!!!!! You look absolutely fabulous. Beautiful 🐈 😻 cat too. Like 👍the lemon 🍋 water 💧 too. Glad to see you having self care. You are very precious. Such a sweetheart 💕 💖. Thanks for doing what you are doing 👏..
Thanks so much!!
Really good subject to make a video on my dude. Such an under appreciated problem in the JWs. It touched my family personally and I know pretty much everyone knew someone in this situation. There was this guy in our cong who couldn’t get remarried and was in his mid 40’s just so lonely and really wanted a family so he was really nice to all us kids. He was one of the nicest people I knew and it just broke my heart.
yeah I really feel for those that get stuck in this weird rule! Haven't talked to you in a minute how are you?
@@exjehovahswitness doing really good. Baby is good and were both healthy. It’s going so well I’m wondering when the other shoe is gonna drop lol
@@tessleonhart8126 Listen bud, Jehovah's witness are very nice people. I know that most marriages are actually very happy in the JW. What I'm Telling you is not an opinion, but a fact.
@@tessleonhart8126 You had a baby?
@@apostababelindajames7461 haven’t yet but will in about 5 months!
Mine eventually ended after my born in wife was running to the elders about our intimate stuff, elders interfering
yeah that has been a problem i have heard from so many people
i wouldn't like that either!!! Some things are supposed to be between a man and a woman only,not a man and a woman and other men!!!
@@xsamitt that was the hold elders had over the congregation, guilt, guilt and more guilt and of course they would enjoy hearing all about the juicy stuff that they probably weren’t getting
Never been married always thanked god for that but I was told by a friend of mine who's a atheist that I needed to thank myself cause I saw a abusive man and wouldn't except that which is true. I never wanted my daughter to see me being abused so I left and even though I tried to work things out he kept putting his hands on me abuse is abuse I just refused to ever put myself in a situation like that ever again. Been a single parent for 14 years now only 33 but building my strength getting in the best shape of my life
I am so sorry you went through that but glad to hear you are on a better path
❤❤❤
I divorced my JW wife because I realized she was totally full of crap and so was the JW organization.
I’m SO HAPPY I found your channel! I guess today’s a binge-watch day for me 😁
haha welcome aboard hope you enjoy the craziness!
This is a very serious topic. I remember this woman that was studying and her husband was a non believer. He would beat her for going to meetings.
I was a 10 year old boy when we were taking her back home after an evening meeting. She was terrified but was told not to leave him.
The grown sisters in the car pulled up to the curb and just let her out.
I felt like they were throwing her into the Roman colosseums center full of lions. It was a very empty feeling for a little boy to be unable to do anything.
I was thinking about the skit you did with the Parking Attendant and Jehovah.
"If a sister is severely abused and her life threatened by her JW husband and she decided to divorce and remarry what should be done?" Parking Attendant
"DEATH!" Jehovah
Parking Attendant "Sounds a little harsh but I can see it may be fare to kill him."
Jehovah "Not him! Death for her for remarrying. She's an unrepentant adultress!"
😢 😭
How despickable Watchtower rules are.
it is so crazy how they do not care about protecting members and i feel this is anohter example that does not get talked about as much as child safeguarding does
@@exjehovahswitness I feel they want abused wives to stay in the marriage because they want to appear wholesome by not having divorces. Another "Sweep it under the rug" song and dance.
They only said "as long as it's bearable" to guilt them to stay together. But also so Watchtower wouldn't be liable if the wife got paralyzed or murdered.
"We told them they could separate or divorce."
Tawkin outta both sides of their mouths!
I was married to a JW. After I was baptized…….
What a confusing person he was…the marriage was mind F$&!k from the very beginning… I thought the confusion and depression came from the physically abused he endured by father when he was a child. Now I believe it was the religion all along or both….He was never satisfied and every year around his birthday, he would start acting weird… he left me several times and wanted a divorce but couldn’t because he didn’t have grounds. After several public reproofs & DF we divorced after nine years….It’s clear now that I’m away from this Gawd awful cult that I believe he was hunted by FOG….his mom also wanted him to be a ministerial servant and constantly talked about Jehovah & Armageddon is near…. It was exhausting…
wow I am sorry you went through that!
@@exjehovahswitness Sorry for what? The JW is not a cult.
@@malakaihernandez2235 Don’t worry Fool,soon you’re evil cult will be out of business !!! 🤪😁😉 I know. A worldly demon.
@@kevinwarren1576 sooner the better
Sooooo apropos, so stuck, they put me here through their years (& his) of daily mental abuse.. freeing myself would have mixed blessing/curse for both of us now.
TH-camr Theramin Trees or Theramintrees deals with narcissistic abusers . He’s a real therapist.
I get the feeling from reading the scriptures that they were written to people at the beginning of a new faith who were generally assumed to be well-intentioned people. I get the very same feeling reading corresponding parts in the Koran. Sadly, we know that this is not the case and many people in religion commit evil in a pro-active way. I think another thing we shouldn’t lose sight of is the fact that many women abuse scripture and congregational procedure for their own advantage too.
My mom ended up having an affair with her coworker to be able to get divorced through Watchtower rules. Of course she was disfellowshipped, but even then the elders tried to counsel her out of divorce, because my dad didn't want to accept it. My dad was physically and verbally abusive, and an alcoholic, but they still treated her adultery as more of a crime. It was not the first time in my mom's (at that time) young life that the elders had counseled her to endure abuse. Up until then, my mom was the most virtuous person I knew. You never would've expected her to commit adultery with how straight-laced and devout she was. They treated my mom like crap after that, but I'm grateful she found the strength to go through that to get us out. Of course, then the legal courts gave dad religious custody of us. But by the time I was legally allowed to choose my religion, I was awake and ready to leave.
Due to the adultery, I think my dad would've been able to remarry. He had a couple talking relationships with older ladies (his age--probably not a huge shock to say my parents are 14 years apart, so he was already much older when they divorced) at some point, but he didn't want to remarry so obviously nothing ever became of those friendships. I have to admit, I'm glad no other women had to be subjected to being married to my dad and suffering the elders' counsel.
Zz is here for us through a difficult subject
I love your content and manner of delivery.
And I would never condone any of watchtower's shit, however, I would say that at the time these articles were written, marital rape was not considered a crime legally. Also, homosexual sex with another person did not constitute grounds for divorce in the divorce courts themselves.
Watchtower falling back on the lame excuse that in lands where child abuse reporting is not mandated they don't need to report has been completely in line with their practice of only doing whatever is 'legally' required or established already eg. the issues you mentioned.
Of course they feel free to disregard Caesar when a matter threatens to hit them in the pocket, and this is what usually forces a brighter flash of light in regard to doctrine and policies.
Best wishes from the UK.
Hi MS V miss your vids😄
@@blahblah2blahblah260 Hi 👋, thanks.
And they also don't care about flowing man laws or mandates with harmful practices like what they are pushing right now 💉
Glad I avoided the whole jw marriage thing.
you are a hero
Meeeee tooooooo 🥳
@@exjehovahswitness No.
Many brothers know the loophole. They just have to bang another chick, tell the elders on themselves, get divorced and be disfellowshipped for a year, and then they get reinstated and remarry with no problems. 🤦🏻♀️
crazy how that is the solution....
@@exjehovahswitness yeah, totally messed up logic
Hello from the UK. Here's something to think about Do please get hold of a copy of DOOMSDAY DECEPTION - the rise and fall of the Watchtower Society (published amazon August 2021) which tells all. Based on more than 50 years investigative journalism and experience of a former JW. Soon after it was published the Watchtower Society removed Pastor Russell's graveside pyramid monument. The book also deals with the Watchtower Society's rapidly shrinking membership as millions of JW's around the world are waking up to reality.
10:04 By that same reasoning - the mate being put to death under the OT law, thus freeing the innocent spouse to remarry - shouldn't murder also be grounds for divorce?
it is
@@exjehovahswitness To JWs? If a JW commits murder is the org ok with the innocent spouse divorcing and remarrying?
You are correct sir! Beastiality is not consensual. I’ve never told my dog yes, but he still humps my leg! Please no victim blaming
"yes yes yes more more!" 🤣
simple right?!
Sounds a lot like the Catholic Church's view on marriage and divorce, (not to mention their view on homosexuality)
Using these quotes/articles/teachings, I call on anyone who knows of a woman/man who being a JW has died under domestic violence circumstances to hold the WTBTS legally liable. These teachings create the toxic criminal environment that now reigns supreme in this horrible religion.
There is a Sister who came to me a couple of years ago with the complaint that certain Elders would counsel Her on how to treat the husband so that he doesn’t beat and abuse her and the children; that SHE (!!!) was causing the abuse. IMAGINE!!!
They used to tell all women that 60 years ago. “It’s your fault he hits you” . That was one reason the woman’s lib movement took off the way it did .
Hi there. Enjoyed this presentation fully, and agree with it completely. It’s obviously written by MEN oblivious of today’s realities. I hope the latest JW generation pays no attention whatsoever to these nonsensical words. Your activism is superb! Thanks, thanks, thanks!!!
Absolutely!
Was Paul married? I guess not had no knowledge of what he was saying!
Is there bearable abuses? No abuse at all
Legal term for rape is: "with violence"!
As far as wt is concerned "the man being the head of his wife" means to most believers that he O W N S his wife; instead of a couple(the two become as one flesh) being equally yoked!
yeah the headship nonsense is insanely offensive
“UNBEARABLE” abuse. How can one even write that? Meaning one is too weak to endure the abuse, or one can no longer stand the abuse. No matter what way you look at it it’s wrong bc ANY abuse is wrong. Wrong. Wrong. WRONG!
yes or no= right and wrong=fun and crime!
Not that anybody should be abused, but if the majority were WOMEN ABUSING their husbands, it would read differently.
I am not married to a Jehovah's witness am still single. I go to Spirit Filled Family Church now
how do you like your new church?
Nice big kitty!🐈😊
🤦🏽♀ This one reminds me of how WT successfully redefined forced in my mind as not really forced. I used that word on Reddit about a story I heard about a sister that divorced her husband because he 'forced' a type of relations that at the time you could divorce for in JW land. It was told to me so casually.
Also, I am sure I heard that word forced many times as just normal behavior for heads of households (men).
I came back to Reddit to an onslaught of That's Grape!!! How dare you! You are horrible! (not exact words)
Maybe it was. IDK, because I got the gist that she wanted to divorce him and used it as a spiritual excuse. I heard it in the 90s or 00s, it happened in the early 70s. Also, the only word you could use with the elders and other JWs was forced, like the articles you read. I guess you had to be there hearing the story from my aunt.
I'm glad to get that straight in my head, however it was like getting schooled by my narc dad.
Ex-jws tend to blame themselves and each other, just as we were trained by WT. No questions, just AARRRGH! YOU!
I really didn't mean to say that word, and now it is a trigger. Thanks ex-jw Reddit. uggh.
exjw reddit is a real wild place that's for sure Your comment might get taken down by YT not me. They don't like the R word very much
@@exjehovahswitness ohhh! Well, thanks for responding. The incident makes me feel real bad on multiple counts. I need to keep it in my to-do list with therapist. Got other things RN. Thanks again!
Married a born in, after 27 years of being unequally yoked and putting up with this BS some damn body owes me some head. Shiiiiiiiiit.
Difficult topics are good. But adding humor is definitely your niche. I would encourage you to keep that up to retain the audience's attention.
Noted!
The cat though, so cute 😍
HE really is the best
I never heard of "unbearable abuses", abuse is abuse.
so gross
Why the abuser = unbeliever? He colud be well be w believer.
My safe word is still pineapple
my safe word is safe word. Helps with ambiguity
@@exjehovahswitness hahahaha
You did more in the first 2.5 minutes of your video for domestically abused women than the society has done in DECADES for the women in that organization.
"In Jehovah's eyes they are still married if divorced but there wasn't adultry"
So Jehovah won't let married people have sex?!
yup!
I never thought masturbation was such a big deal.
Even if the Hand got pregnant the Hand Baby would be raised by it's Dad and Hand Mom.
That is of course if the Dad cut the Hand Mom out of his life. 😂
There right now. My sexually abusive ex was an elder and all that could be said for consolation was for me to be a good wife and go back to him. Now of course he’s on good terms with MY family and everyone cuz he still attends but I’ll be booted once I move on 🙃🤡💩
wow! I am so sorry... I hope you are safe and have a plan moving forward
@@exjehovahswitness Thank you! My daughter and I are doing well on our own and thriving now 😊 I really appreciate your videos and the humor and lightheartedness.
You were a good example for your daughter to not put up with abusers ! You should be proud of yourself . If your daughter cares about your ex don’t make the mistake of bad mouthing him . She has to make up her own mind about his behavior. My mom did that and because I has a slightly better relationship with him than she did ( BTW he was a horrible parent and I knew it then too) , it caused some problems
Yo guys, leave a comment for the algorithm
I like that git the F - Out!!!
yeah it is funny
Late comment, but marital rape was LEGAL in the U. S. until 1975.
I thought pornea was all that was needed!? That is insane!!
haha look at ur cat.. 😀😀😄
he is the best
I think you missed something. Yes there are situations as you did talk about. The real problem is that the forbid oral or anal sex. Reading between the lines the make some way to excuse to have oral or anal sex if the husband fores the wife.
yeah I am going to do a whole video on gooffy sex stuff
@JW Thoughts Tanks for answering! Would be great if you could do an other video on the subject. Gives the woman some excuse to engage in practices like oral or anal sex because she can say she is forced to engage. Is somehow a bit like with blood transfusion, if authority's force one by a curt destitution then it is no problem to take a transfusion, so it is here in Austria.
Listen man, we all have our own opinions on what we think. Everyone I know who stayed a Jehovah's witness is happily married. Well actually just the people who wants to be married. Hope you have a good day :)
JW’s like to keep a lid on the fact they have a LOT of marriage problems within the cult. We’ve had talks on the circuit level on the “Giving Attention to the needs of the circuit” at past assemblies in Romeoville outside of Chicago.
REALLY?!??