It's what I do whenever someone goes for an insult about my surname that I've heard approximately a million times before. I don;t mind getting mocked for it, I just want a little originality...
I was recently reminded of the scene while watching an episode of Ted Lasso, where Ted was holding a press conference and he had just been insulted and told them that they’d really missed an opportunity, at which point he started rattling off Berger (and funnier) jabs at himself. By the time he was done, all of the reporters were laughing their butts off and they found themselves laughing WITH him, not AT him.
My sister and I actually sat down with the tape and counted the jokes......he actually comes up with TWENTY-FIVE "something betters". It's still HILARIOUS!!!
+jws1272 Yeah, I realized that too. The creators of this movie probably figured that with Steve Martin's comedic brilliance, they might as well have him do twenty-five comebacks to that hot shot prissy guy who was roughing him up even though there were only supposed to be twenty. I loved how angry and provoked that guy was by the final comeback when Charlie said "Your name wouldn't be DICK, would it?" Classic scene! ~Dutch
The story goes that Steve Martin, after filming this scene, walked into a local bar while still in makeup. One of the bikers sitting at a table asked, "Why the long face?" Martin cracked up.
Magnetobiological "Do you point north floating in water?" Fairy Tale "Rapunzel! Rapunzel!... Grab on!" Military "I feel like a buncha mini paratroopers just gonna fly outta there." Modern "Excuse me in front, social distancing, you got another 6 feet to go" Sporty "So watching tennis must be a breeze" Jealousy "How must that feel? Always being a step behind?" Festive "What were you for Halloween, a nutsack?" Ok I gotta stop at 7, back to work, heh heh
No, keep on going! Breaking news "This just in, a large monstrous nose is wreaking havoc, careful it's large and dangerous " Kung Fu "Wax on and Wax off that nose" Western "This town ain't big enough for the two of our noses" Mr t. "I pity the fool and his nose" Wes Anderson "The nose: 16 inches long and never ends" Disney "When you wish upon a nose your dreams come true" Shakespeare "If my nose be waspish, best beware its sting" Smurfs "What a smurfy nose" Mean Girls "Oh look, pinocchio texted me. He wants his nose back"
Not only hilarious but the ultra casual way he blocks, chops the guy in the balls and gives him the Ol Bruce Lee backfist over the shoulder is the icing on the cake!
Love how his first 24 jokes are just a setup to be able to call the guy "dick" to his face, just like in the original all of Cyrano's jokes are a setup to the "You have three letters only!-they spell Ass!" line.
On of my favorite scenes in the entire movie. I also like when they're talking to Roxanne outside her widow and C.D. is whispering what to say to Chris
CD: Tell her...you were afraid. CHRIS: That I was afraid! ROXANNE: Afraid? Afraid of what? CD: Tell her you were afraid of words. CHRIS: What? What? What?? CD: Words. CHRIS: Because I was afraid of worms, Roxanne, worms!
I work in film and I hate to let you down. But making a comedy film is a horror. It's not fun to record the same joke over and over again. On the other hand, making a horror film is a true comedy.
Steve Martin is C.D. Bales, a perfect catch for any woman except for one drawback. He has a humongous nose. It hypnotizes! No one can ignore it. The movie is a take on the play, "Cyrano de Bergerac." C.D. works for the fire department and falls in love with Roxanne, an astronomy student. Because of his nose, he courts her through a friend. The scene in which Martin enumerates insults is brilliant.
He actually ended up doing 25, since when he was told he had done 14, he had actually done 19. I guess everyone was too amused to keep track, and just wanted more!
To be honest, the original Cyrano de Bergerac is written in french. Being french and (almost) bilingual, I can tell you that the English traduction was done pretty badly if you consider that the original text had rimes, assonances, and a certain rhythm to it. All written in alexandrine verse. It loses everything in the English translation.
@@MrPOKER725 It depends on who writes the translation. The 1990 version with Gerard Depardieu was translated by Anthony Burgess and contains the rhyming of the Alexandrine.
@@MrPOKER725 You try and rhyme it in a language so different. I have read the Italian translation, and in that one they tried their best to keep the rhymes and a sense of rhythm.
Depends if he was "on" or not, when Williams was on he would have come up with 20 in about a minute, very manic, the tough guy would never have caught his breath, would have been an interesting comparison, of course Williams would have ad libbed most of his own whereas Martin's were probably scripted and Williams would also have had to be cut for a family rating
The guy Steve Martin buries in this scene was typecast as assholes. He also appears as a biligerant truck driver at the beginning of See no Evil, Hear no Evil.
(12/5/21) My Grandma and I just watched this movie together, we both loved it! This was my favorite scene- it was also the funniest. Fun Fact: "Bales is challenged to tell 20 nose jokes. After he tells 18 or 19, he asks "How many's that?" to which he is told, "Fourteen!" He goes on to tell another six, making 24 or 25 in total. (One was deleted in the TV version, resulting in the different totals.)" (Copied from IMDB.)
Let me try a few (not 20) "If you kiss a girl, will you stick her eye out?" "So you are a better liar than Pinocchio?" "So you can still ring the doorbell with your hands full?" "Is that your nose, or are you just happy to see me?" "How many hankies do you need to blow your nose?" "So everything *IS* bigger in the States?" "The world is unfair. You should give some of yours to Lord Voldemort"
Ahh the Old Richards On Richards downtown Vancouver, BC. I missed playing there, and Nelson, BC where it was shot. Such a beautiful location and movie of course. I just watched 2 nights ago... Love it!
@@colormedubious4747 Actually in the movie, it's supposed to be "Nelson, Washington" -- which doesn't actually exist. That's why Nelson's Bank of Montreal building becomes the US Post Office in the movie, with the Stars & Stripes flying outside. I wondered what the heck was going on when I first saw the US flag flying there.
@@JohnCee754 Holy cow! I never picked up on that. I'm not even Canadian, but the first time I saw the film I thought "That looks like the Canadian Rockies." Movie magic, eh?
Im a big guy and i had someone above the age of 10 try to insult me by calling me "Fatso" my response was "you have all this (jestering to me physique) to work with and thats the best you can do? I pitty you."
It wasn't until 0:49 that I realized that Steve Martin's nose was BIG:D But the jokes he made up about the guy's nose was hilarious - as was the last part. This had me laughing pretty much the entire time:))
I have owned this movie on CED disc (only about a thousand were made - shortly after CEDs were a thing of the past - I sold my collection of about 600 movies and made the down payment on my first house 😃), VHS tape, and now on CD
Hey ... the guy hit 20 TWICE on the dartboard; so "CD" (aka "Big-Nose") perhaps should've come up with 40 alternatives, instead of just 20!! That would've been SO awesome, LMAO!!! 👃💭💡😂
The octopus government told you to leave, We gave you time to leave. We were slow and methodical, yet you were assaultive,and aggressive with officers,and the horses. Based on your behavior the pigs have refused to find any more truffles until you leave. 3:11 it's trudeau
The first episode of the third season of TED LASSO has a scene at a press conference that borrows the tone and structure of this scene. Ted calls himself dumb and then comes up with jokes about how dumb he is.
I'm unreasonably pissed that the "darts champion" can't throw. Happens all the time in movies - Teach them how to throw like it's actually something they've done before.
![[Full] 4 ต่อ 4 Celebrity EP.922 | 10 พ.ย. 67 | one31](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/zmV5HRIxIBI/mqdefault.jpg)
![[안방1열 직캠4K] 베이비몬스터 치키타 'DRIP' (BABYMONSTER CHIQUITA FanCam) @SBS Inkigayo 241110](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/tnlxo79cAqY/mqdefault.jpg)
He got a guy mad by INSULTING HIMSELF BETTER.
That's f*cking class!
Self-mockery is the best defense against someone trying to have a laugh at your expense.
And some of the insults actually came from the original play. Brilliant.
It's what I do whenever someone goes for an insult about my surname that I've heard approximately a million times before. I don;t mind getting mocked for it, I just want a little originality...
@@philiphunn194 Does everybody always say, "Ugh, worst nepotism case is Atilla's kid." ?
I was recently reminded of the scene while watching an episode of Ted Lasso, where Ted was holding a press conference and he had just been insulted and told them that they’d really missed an opportunity, at which point he started rattling off Berger (and funnier) jabs at himself. By the time he was done, all of the reporters were laughing their butts off and they found themselves laughing WITH him, not AT him.
My sister and I actually sat down with the tape and counted the jokes......he actually comes up with TWENTY-FIVE "something betters". It's still HILARIOUS!!!
+jws1272 Yeah, I realized that too. The creators of this movie probably figured that with Steve Martin's comedic brilliance, they might as well have him do twenty-five comebacks to that hot shot prissy guy who was roughing him up even though there were only supposed to be twenty. I loved how angry and provoked that guy was by the final comeback when Charlie said "Your name wouldn't be DICK, would it?"
Classic scene!
~Dutch
actually, according to the making of, this scence was ad libbed, and the cast was having such a good time they lied on the number
actually, according to the making of, this scence was ad libbed, and the cast was having such a good time they lied on the number
actually, according to the making of, this scence was ad libbed, and the cast was having such a good time they lied on the number
Dick Barnabus Okay. I get it. You didn't have to send your comment three times.
~Dutch
The story goes that Steve Martin, after filming this scene, walked into a local bar while still in makeup. One of the bikers sitting at a table asked, "Why the long face?"
Martin cracked up.
Morale of the Story. The Biker had inclusive humor that was good spirited. Everybody won.
Better dig than all the one's said in the movie.
@@drtroyturner7464 woke incels not apply
@@pikespeak361 "woke" and "incels" do not go together. I don't think you know who incels are.
@@ransom182 basement dwellers who suck in CNN 😂😂😂
80's Cinema was a time of ridiculously massive barrooms that routinely held several thousand people at once.
We did this when there was something worth celebrating. It actually happened.
These places existed. Often 2 levels just like this one.
PARANOID:
KEEP THAT GUY AWAY FROM MY COCAINE
lol
Steve Martin truly was one of the best actors to portray Cyrano de Bergerac
This is one of my favorite scenes in any movie... ever.
wait till you watch the original Cyrano de Bergerac. Starring Gerard Depardieu. Even the English version is as good as the French version.
Same here. 👍🏻🤣
@@ceeqanguel I've seen Gerard Depardieu's version. I've also seen José Ferrer’s original. Loved all three. But Steve Martin's has my heart.
watch the orginal cyrano de bergenac or read the play
@@ceeqanguel ... better ... Watch the 1955 version with Jose Ferre ... The Best !
Great lesson for dealing with bullies. Got me through high school.
This movie is criminally underrated.
Its always been one of my favorites
Don't look up you might poke a hole in the ozone layer!
Environmental :)
@@rizvaldo7209 ok.
Law firm:
"My client is suing you for 50,000 dollars. His name is Pinocchio. "
Dude😅
Magnetobiological
"Do you point north floating in water?"
Fairy Tale
"Rapunzel! Rapunzel!... Grab on!"
Military
"I feel like a buncha mini paratroopers just gonna fly outta there."
Modern
"Excuse me in front, social distancing, you got another 6 feet to go"
Sporty
"So watching tennis must be a breeze"
Jealousy
"How must that feel? Always being a step behind?"
Festive
"What were you for Halloween, a nutsack?"
Ok I gotta stop at 7, back to work, heh heh
No, keep on going!
Breaking news
"This just in, a large monstrous nose is wreaking havoc, careful it's large and dangerous "
Kung Fu
"Wax on and Wax off that nose"
Western
"This town ain't big enough for the two of our noses"
Mr t.
"I pity the fool and his nose"
Wes Anderson
"The nose: 16 inches long and never ends"
Disney
"When you wish upon a nose your dreams come true"
Shakespeare
"If my nose be waspish, best beware its sting"
Smurfs
"What a smurfy nose"
Mean Girls
"Oh look, pinocchio texted me. He wants his nose back"
One of my favorites, from the original French play: “When it bleeds - the Red Sea!”
Not only hilarious but the ultra casual way he blocks, chops the guy in the balls and gives him the Ol Bruce Lee backfist over the shoulder is the icing on the cake!
"Perceptive: Can't tell the truth to save your life, can you?"
"Cinematic: Dudley Dawson just lost his nickname!" (Revenge of the Nerds)
Love how his first 24 jokes are just a setup to be able to call the guy "dick" to his face, just like in the original all of Cyrano's jokes are a setup to the "You have three letters only!-they spell Ass!" line.
On of my favorite scenes in the entire movie. I also like when they're talking to Roxanne outside her widow and C.D. is whispering what to say to Chris
Jordan Turner i was afraid of worms Roxanne worms.
CD: Tell her...you were afraid.
CHRIS: That I was afraid!
ROXANNE: Afraid? Afraid of what?
CD: Tell her you were afraid of words.
CHRIS: What? What? What??
CD: Words.
CHRIS: Because I was afraid of worms, Roxanne, worms!
actually, according to the making of, this scence was ad libbed, and the cast was having such a good time they lied on the number
That makes a lot more sense. I'd been wondering if there were special cuts that removed some of the naughtier ones and that's why the number was off.
Thanks
Probably so, when they sang "He has the whole world in his nose" some were singing "in his hand".
Classic Steve Martin.
It’s based off Cyrano de Bergerac though
th-cam.com/video/nFiLIsMieiQ/w-d-xo.html
That grindstone joke........ HILARIOUS.
that must have been like doing stand up comedy for steve, the actors and extras must have loved this scene.
I work in film and I hate to let you down.
But making a comedy film is a horror. It's not fun to record the same joke over and over again. On the other hand, making a horror film is a true comedy.
2:02 You may think it's what's IN a nose that's important, but it's snot :P
Richard Thompson Ar ar. :)
& boogers the size of Buicks!!!!!
Richard Thompson ruining someone’s joke doesn’t make you funnier
Ba dum tss
Preceded by a MastercClass ad hosted by Steve Martin. Now THAT'S targeted marketing.
Edmond Rostand is very proud of this movie adaptation ! He still laughing and laughing and laughing, and grateful of the Steve Martin's talent §§§§§
I loved the whole scene but that whole world song with the whole bar was truly epic. 🤣
Than the three in punch was sweet, and not even looking back. 🤣
It's as if Charlie was saying "Fuck you" to that guy with every joke. 😂😂😂😂😂🤣
Steve Martin is C.D. Bales, a perfect catch for any woman except for one drawback. He has a humongous nose. It hypnotizes! No one can ignore it. The movie is a take on the play, "Cyrano de Bergerac." C.D. works for the fire department and falls in love with Roxanne, an astronomy student. Because of his nose, he courts her through a friend. The scene in which Martin enumerates insults is brilliant.
He actually ended up doing 25, since when he was told he had done 14, he had actually done 19. I guess everyone was too amused to keep track, and just wanted more!
Knowing how it goes in the original Cyrano de Bergerac this is pretty funny
How does it go?
To be honest, the original Cyrano de Bergerac is written in french. Being french and (almost) bilingual, I can tell you that the English traduction was done pretty badly if you consider that the original text had rimes, assonances, and a certain rhythm to it. All written in alexandrine verse. It loses everything in the English translation.
The part with the little birds is really from the play.
@@MrPOKER725 It depends on who writes the translation. The 1990 version with Gerard Depardieu was translated by Anthony Burgess and contains the rhyming of the Alexandrine.
@@MrPOKER725 You try and rhyme it in a language so different. I have read the Italian translation, and in that one they tried their best to keep the rhymes and a sense of rhythm.
“Has he fallen yet?”
Now, he did at 4:46.
TIMBER!
@@joewebb4495 that's my line
My absolute favorite Steve Martin movie.
When you stop and smell the flowers....are they afraid?
Steve Martin owned this character, but I would have LOVED to see what Robin Williams could have done with it.
Yeah me to, Robin probably would have kept going
And he wouldn't have needed the prosthesis.
2/3 of the jokes would have been about that nose vs line after line of Bolivia's best.
Depends if he was "on" or not, when Williams was on he would have come up with 20 in about a minute, very manic, the tough guy would never have caught his breath, would have been an interesting comparison, of course Williams would have ad libbed most of his own whereas Martin's were probably scripted and Williams would also have had to be cut for a family rating
@@jeffturnbull9661 I agree, So true They would censor some of his comments
Emotional: "I'm a very scentimental man."
LMAO brilliant!
If this were facebook, you'd win a yellow card.
The guy Steve Martin buries in this scene was typecast as assholes. He also appears as a biligerant truck driver at the beginning of See no Evil, Hear no Evil.
What’s his name?
@@seastriker4437 Thom Curley
Mine too, love the movie and where it was filmed at beautiful mountain country.
"Pinocchio called. He wants his nose back."
I asked Pinocchio if Cyrano stole Pinocchio's nose, but when Pinocchio denied it, his nose grew back.
4:34 One of the absolute greatest insults I've ever had the pleasure of hearing.
(12/5/21) My Grandma and I just watched this movie together, we both loved it!
This was my favorite scene- it was also the funniest.
Fun Fact: "Bales is challenged to tell 20 nose jokes. After he tells 18 or 19, he asks "How many's that?" to which he is told, "Fourteen!" He goes on to tell another six, making 24 or 25 in total. (One was deleted in the TV version, resulting in the different totals.)" (Copied from IMDB.)
Let me try a few (not 20)
"If you kiss a girl, will you stick her eye out?"
"So you are a better liar than Pinocchio?"
"So you can still ring the doorbell with your hands full?"
"Is that your nose, or are you just happy to see me?"
"How many hankies do you need to blow your nose?"
"So everything *IS* bigger in the States?"
"The world is unfair. You should give some of yours to Lord Voldemort"
Good, though of course, Voldemort didn't exist then.
@@mzmadmike I know, but as jokes about Voldemort not having a nose are also legio, I couldn't resist joining in :)
Your jokes are funnier than the movie jokes!
@@ukmedicfrcs
They are? 😲
Thanks
The doorbell one, that is fantastic imagery.
Ahh the Old Richards On Richards downtown Vancouver, BC. I missed playing there, and Nelson, BC where it was shot. Such a beautiful location and movie of course. I just watched 2 nights ago... Love it!
My personal favorite was, "You could de-emphasize your nose if you wore something larger. Like Wyoming."
paranoid: keep that guy away from my cocaine!! omg 🤣😂😂🤣😂🤣😂😂😂
Filmed in beautiful Nelson, BC (Canada) -- I was living there at the time. One of my favourite places on Earth.
Yes, but in the movie, the town is... Nelson, BC.
@@colormedubious4747 Actually in the movie, it's supposed to be "Nelson, Washington" -- which doesn't actually exist. That's why Nelson's Bank of Montreal building becomes the US Post Office in the movie, with the Stars & Stripes flying outside. I wondered what the heck was going on when I first saw the US flag flying there.
@@JohnCee754 Holy cow! I never picked up on that. I'm not even Canadian, but the first time I saw the film I thought "That looks like the Canadian Rockies." Movie magic, eh?
Darnit....I wanna see the crowd applaud as he walks away
Im a big guy and i had someone above the age of 10 try to insult me by calling me "Fatso" my response was "you have all this (jestering to me physique) to work with and thats the best you can do? I pitty you."
What something better would you have said?
It wasn't until 0:49 that I realized that Steve Martin's nose was BIG:D But the jokes he made up about the guy's nose was hilarious - as was the last part. This had me laughing pretty much the entire time:))
Astronomical: I haven't seen solar prominences that long.
One of my all time favorites. !
I watched this movie with a woman nearly 30 years ago....I still love this movie and this woman, well, wherever you are...
he doesn't even have to lie and he's made Pinocchio envious!😂
I wonder if a comeback this good could happen in real life🤔
:) Groucho Marx could do it.
You need 8-10 charisma in ur stats.
@Kai Alias and a good grasp of the language and an imagination which Mr. BIG NOSE just didn't have!
I have owned this movie on CED disc (only about a thousand were made - shortly after CEDs were a thing of the past - I sold my collection of about 600 movies and made the down payment on my first house 😃), VHS tape, and now on CD
A favorite movie of mine. I try to watch it at least once a month.
I actually counted 25.
Me too
Love the sound of the record scraping when Steve turns around.
can't even lose with dignity
“When it bleeds . . . THE RED SEA!”
Two generations from now, comedians are going to own this scene to spite their parents and great-grandparents. In 26K skyscraperDefinition.
I love cyrano de berguac!!
"I hate to see the grindstone" is definitely the best one.
It was one of my favorite scenes from that movie
Oh someone use those jokes with Usopp.
MY brother just recommended seeing this after Usopp reunited with Nami.
This scene was one of my favorites after all these years. Yep very funny!
The one about smelling the coffee in Brazil was a classic.
Hey ... the guy hit 20 TWICE on the dartboard; so "CD" (aka "Big-Nose") perhaps should've come up with 40 alternatives, instead of just 20!! That would've been SO awesome, LMAO!!! 👃💭💡😂
I was too young at the time to know what the grindstone one was about. Still enjoyed it though.
(whispers: prefer The Jerk though)
One of the BEST parts of this movie. Uad a similar part in the old black and white also
I'd forgotten just how good that scene was.
This scene is where B-Rabbit learned hour to beat Papa Doc
One of my favorite scenes! Thanks!
Thanks for posting this. Having great time thinking about Bill Maher during this video. Rest in peace Stan Lee. The Homer of our age. Excelsior!
That was amazing, actually pretty funny jokes when paired with context.
One of me favorite scenes, even though I love the whole movie
The octopus government told you to leave, We gave you time to leave. We were slow and methodical, yet you were assaultive,and aggressive with officers,and the horses. Based on your behavior the pigs have refused to find any more truffles until you leave. 3:11 it's trudeau
Martin should have got an Oscar nod based on this scene.
Or at least received an Oscar nomination for the script, which he wrote.
I wish I had this many counter-jokes about my gap teeth.
Man gap teeth are hot, just think about Elijah wood that guy is sexy af
I have gap teeth myself, but no one has ever said a word about them.
here is one.. well if you ever need to floss your teeth while jogging.. you can just use your shoelaces...LOL
"When Moses parted the Red Sea, did it affect your teeth as well?"
Hope that works! :)
He completely owned that prick! Well done!
I know he did one like this, but I thought of "Hey buddy, put that thing away, this is a family place."
On the front of a train to keep the cows off the track.
One of my all time fave movies
I loved growing up in this era
Amazing how you can self deprecate and mock the guy who tried to insult you at the same time.
I use to love this movie as a kid.
Great movie. Brilliant comedian. Incredible man!
My favorite scene in this movie
#jeffpiegari this is the scene of the movie of "Roxanne" 1987 was C.D. Bales being a comedian performance.
A comedic take on a scene from cyrano de bergerac
RIP Shelley Duvall as Dixie, the friend and confidant of Steve Martin’s character Charlie “CD” Bales.
3:32 yep, when the guy yells out 14, it was actually 19. Never drink and joke.
He did that on purpose so he would tell more jokes. The scene was improvised.
Please a mashup between Steve and Gerard Depardieu!
Such a classic funny movie. RIP Dixie!
The French part is his early preparation to become Inspector Jacques Clouseau in The Pink Panther.
The other great scene: when they put out the fire, and Steve is smiling as they do so.
The first episode of the third season of TED LASSO has a scene at a press conference that borrows the tone and structure of this scene. Ted calls himself dumb and then comes up with jokes about how dumb he is.
DAMN, now why couldn't I have come up with some of those comebacks when I was in grade school or high school?!?!
0:25 always had in stitches as a kid😂
Steve Martin, was a awesome man, great actor. Loved all your movies. GOD bless.
I'm unreasonably pissed that the "darts champion" can't throw. Happens all the time in movies - Teach them how to throw like it's actually something they've done before.
What I love about this scene is that he took maybe two jokes from the original source material.
Classic! Thanks for this great video.
He has a strong personality
It's giving Robin Williams