A major turning point in my life was when I served in the US Army for 2 years back in 1989 to 1991. I grew up with social and generalized anxiety disorder my whole life and because of my fears I missed out on a lot of life in those school years through high school. I had depression and suicidal thoughts that tormented me. When I took the plunge and joined the service after basic and AIT training I got to travel overseas and gained a lot of confidence overall in life. I got baptized at a local christian church based in Lawton, Oklahoma around the 3rd week of basic training. A local preacher came to the base and asked if anyone would like to get baptized. I was the only one who volunteered and he arranged to take me in the following week. After getting out of the service I went to college and got my bachelor's degree in Finance. While the social anxiety never completely left me I feel better overall. I always hoped I would end up married with my own family but because of my shyness I never really met the right girl so it never happened. I'm at peace with it now though. My parents are both in their 70's and neither drive anymore so I live with them and take them to their appointments, grocery store, etc. My name is Rodney btw.
It’s great to hear from you brother! Those Inner Demons are something we deal with all of our lives. I always had horrible social anxiety, but got lucky pretty early on when I learned to channel it in different ways, usually through humor. It got me into trouble a lot in school, but it was always worth it to me because I was able to meet friends and girls. Although, when I started dating the girls it usually fell apart in pretty pathetic ways. My ego (one of the most sinister Inner Demons) always reminded me of all of my flaws. I never felt worthy of love. Even when people would pay attention to me, I spent my time waiting for them to figure out what a failure and fraud I was. In my early twenties, I was out of shape and clueless as to what to do with my life. I looked in the mirror and hated the person I saw on the outside and inside. I decided that I was going to take control of whatever I could, and I started working out like a maniac. I dropped 130 lbs and my self confidence was high for the first time. I had no shortage of girls throwing themselves at me, but then I realized that I was becoming a different kind of person I didn’t want to be; an asshole. After this, I just kind of resigned myself to the understanding that I could never be the person I wished I was, because I had no clue who that person was. I did what I was supposed to do (according to society) and got a wife and a job. I was not good at my job, fixing computers and gas pumps, because I’m not a technically-minded person. But I devoted enough time to it to make myself passably decent at it. Then, that was taken from me too after I became disabled from a back injury. During disability was when my social anxiety came roaring back. I wasn’t comfortable around anyone. Being stuck at home made me feel like an alien every time I left. What made it worse was that I would start sweating whenever my pain got worse, and I have constant nerve pain. Then, my anxiety about sweating just magnified the problem. This was the state I was in when I finally hit rock bottom. When God saved me, He showed me that every bit of suffering in my life was for a specific reason. It was all like lessons and tragedies that were funneling me to Him. I feel like this is what’s been happening to you, as well. You have been in situations where you know you can overcome hardships with the military and your degree. You also were needed to take care of your parents, which is amazing and something that, sadly, too many would not do these days. As far as finding a woman, this is something that has become increasingly more difficult these days. So many women are egotistical and have impossible standards. With those types of women, you’re better off alone. But I have to say, maybe focus on renewing that relationship you started with God. Knowing Christ’s Love is enough something that propels us through many hard times, but He taught the importance of forming that personal relationship with The Father. I can go into how I connect with God, but we all have our own, unique ways of doing this. Just try finding a private place where you’re comfortable (I go into nature), and start talking to Him. Pretend He’s your councilor and best friend and tell Him all of your troubles and joys in life. I always ask Him only for guidance and I try to focus on the ways I see Him usually communicate with me. It usually happens through something called Synchronicity, something in nature catching my attention (animal / plant / wind) at specific times, or I will have random thoughts that lead me to the wisdom He’s imparting on me. I know I’ve been going on too long, but I really think a relationship with God can transform you completely. I went from extremely socially anxious to someone who seems to attract people everywhere I go. Often times faith and spirituality come up without me even bringing it up. It was like God was waiting for me to get the wisdom from my years of suffering to be ready for what He had prepared for me next; to spread His Light. I realized how powerful this attraction He blessed me with was when I had a group of people talking and laughing while standing in line at the DMV. I talk about it in an upcoming video. If God’s Light can spread to a DMV line, it can spread anywhere! haha
@@lionsonthepath Thank you for your profound reply. I really appreciate your insight. Like you I enjoy getting out in nature taking walks and just trying to absorb what all is happening around me. I often feel closer to God in these instances. Even something as simple as a gentle breeze on a hot day while walking will trigger a thought where I will thank Him for that comfort. I love my parents dearly and don't consider it a burden to live with them and help out. I believe it is really important to find ways to be loving and helpful, whether it's towards people, animals, etc. You really can't find a substitute for that. That is part of the God-sized hole within each of us that cannot be filled with money, drugs, sex, etc. Some people that retire end up dying within a year or so because all of their self-identity is tied up to a job and routine revolved around that. They just feel empty, lacking purpose and without any type of direction in their lives. Even though I never married or had children I started sponsoring a girl from Bangladesh through the Christian ministry World Vision. I've been doing it for over 4 years now. Her name is Toma and she is 13 now. She doesn't speak English but we write letters and an intrepreter translates them for us. i feel so honored to be a blessing in her and her families life. I also feed some stray cats in my neighborhood and have been getting a lot of them neutered/spayed to cut down on the kitten overpopulation. I've been doing this for over 6 years now. I adopted a couple and have found homes for some of the kittens where the mothers didn't get spayed in time. A few years ago I bought a nice big dog house and filled it with straw to use as a shelter in the winter for some of the cats. I also converted over some larger cat carriers for the same purpose. A neighbor once saw the dog house and commented that he thought it was really `nice and "A God thing" that I was doing. I wasn't sure how to respond to that so I just thanked him. When I first started I had thought about quitting but something within me keeps driving me to help care for them at my own expense. I can't really explain it to be honest.
I think it’s amazing that you’re sponsoring that girl and working with the stray cats. Finding a purpose to help all living things is exactly what God wants us to do, each in our own unique way. And having never married was the path that was chosen for you. We do need human connection, but we can get that in many ways. Serving others and striving to be more Christlike is the greatest reflection of God’s Love.
Hi Josh. Lots happening there today😅. Totally agree, one does not value whats given rather what one earns. And I have met the nicest school janitors and they make a good living IMO. I have respect for all doing those jobs. Someone has to do it.
It was quite the adventure today! 🤣 Society puts its focus on fame or who can give them the most stuff, but so many people who make the world go ‘round just slip through the cracks. I think the best of us are mostly down in the dirt. It’s a dark place, but it’s also where God’s Light shines the brightest.
If I didn't have my disability I wound have lost my Husband. Getting diagnosed with bipolar disorder, and finding the right meds, and therapy helped me to become a much better person. Thanks for the Video Josh. I had the flu the past week, so I'm catching up on your vids. Have A Beautiful Sunday with Your Family ✌️🙏
These tragedies that happen in our lives seem like such a curse, but they are just the harsh ways we must learn where we need to go. We truly must walk through Hell to get to Heaven. Much love to you and your family. I’m so glad you are recovering and I am blessed that God connected us.
Perhaps having this channel is the most important thing you'll ever do in life. I'm sure that these talks that you give affect many people's lives in a positive way. God is not the slightest bit impressed by money, fame or power. Many in our society believe that those who have these things are somehow morally superior and that they've been blessed by God. I think that in fact quite often it's the opposite. Remember how Jesus was offered all the kingdoms of the Earth and their riches by Satan. These things all belong to the devil, yet that is what people strive all of their lives to attain. The meek shall inherit the Earth.
And He also said that it is easier for a camel to pass through a head of a needle than a rich man to get to Heaven. I never thought that I would be on TH-cam doing videos. I’ve always been a horrible speaker, whether in front of a crowd or a camera, and I’m not the prettiest to look at. Haha. But this has been one of the greatest blessings of my life. We live in such an ugly, fallen world. As we’ve discussed, the internet is the culmination of the worst of humanity in one nasty place. But I think about how ugly the world has always been, especially in the times of Christ, and I understand why God made Himself flesh to give us this gift of unconditional love and Salvation. He knows that His Plan depends on us having free will. It’s like I mentioned in the video; if you don’t work to earn something, you squander it. We have lived with this suffering and pain because we will learn to cherish the gifts of Love and Peace when we finally have been humbled enough to open our hearts to it. I truly feel churches are vital for society, but I feel God is calling me to follow Christ’s teachings in substance and style. He was the poor carpenter who traveled where He was called to go, spreading His Light to the weak, poor, and oppressed first and foremost. This is what community in Christ means to me. Those of us who have fallen through the cracks in society are the ones who will be on the front lines in this war We must wage it with Peace and Love, and lift up our suffering brothers and sisters.
@@lionsonthepath Thanks for that brother. I do not belong to any church since I've never been able to find one that truly reflects Jesus love. I gave up on organized religion years ago. Sadly, in my experience I have found that most atheists seem to be more moral than a lot of Christians. Too often I see churches that drive people away from Christ.
"The connection within yourself". Very well said, Josh.
Great message beautiful soul 👍😁! Loads of love ❤️ and hugs 🫂 to you kindred spirit, your family and your viewers 🙌. ✨️🙏😇
Thank you Josh for this video❤
A major turning point in my life was when I served in the US Army for 2 years back in 1989 to 1991. I grew up with social and generalized anxiety disorder my whole life and because of my fears I missed out on a lot of life in those school years through high school. I had depression and suicidal thoughts that tormented me. When I took the plunge and joined the service after basic and AIT training I got to travel overseas and gained a lot of confidence overall in life. I got baptized at a local christian church based in Lawton, Oklahoma around the 3rd week of basic training. A local preacher came to the base and asked if anyone would like to get baptized. I was the only one who volunteered and he arranged to take me in the following week. After getting out of the service I went to college and got my bachelor's degree in Finance. While the social anxiety never completely left me I feel better overall. I always hoped I would end up married with my own family but because of my shyness I never really met the right girl so it never happened. I'm at peace with it now though. My parents are both in their 70's and neither drive anymore so I live with them and take them to their appointments, grocery store, etc. My name is Rodney btw.
It’s great to hear from you brother! Those Inner Demons are something we deal with all of our lives. I always had horrible social anxiety, but got lucky pretty early on when I learned to channel it in different ways, usually through humor. It got me into trouble a lot in school, but it was always worth it to me because I was able to meet friends and girls. Although, when I started dating the girls it usually fell apart in pretty pathetic ways.
My ego (one of the most sinister Inner Demons) always reminded me of all of my flaws. I never felt worthy of love. Even when people would pay attention to me, I spent my time waiting for them to figure out what a failure and fraud I was.
In my early twenties, I was out of shape and clueless as to what to do with my life. I looked in the mirror and hated the person I saw on the outside and inside. I decided that I was going to take control of whatever I could, and I started working out like a maniac. I dropped 130 lbs and my self confidence was high for the first time. I had no shortage of girls throwing themselves at me, but then I realized that I was becoming a different kind of person I didn’t want to be; an asshole.
After this, I just kind of resigned myself to the understanding that I could never be the person I wished I was, because I had no clue who that person was. I did what I was supposed to do (according to society) and got a wife and a job. I was not good at my job, fixing computers and gas pumps, because I’m not a technically-minded person. But I devoted enough time to it to make myself passably decent at it. Then, that was taken from me too after I became disabled from a back injury.
During disability was when my social anxiety came roaring back. I wasn’t comfortable around anyone. Being stuck at home made me feel like an alien every time I left. What made it worse was that I would start sweating whenever my pain got worse, and I have constant nerve pain. Then, my anxiety about sweating just magnified the problem. This was the state I was in when I finally hit rock bottom.
When God saved me, He showed me that every bit of suffering in my life was for a specific reason. It was all like lessons and tragedies that were funneling me to Him. I feel like this is what’s been happening to you, as well. You have been in situations where you know you can overcome hardships with the military and your degree. You also were needed to take care of your parents, which is amazing and something that, sadly, too many would not do these days.
As far as finding a woman, this is something that has become increasingly more difficult these days. So many women are egotistical and have impossible standards. With those types of women, you’re better off alone. But I have to say, maybe focus on renewing that relationship you started with God. Knowing Christ’s Love is enough something that propels us through many hard times, but He taught the importance of forming that personal relationship with The Father.
I can go into how I connect with God, but we all have our own, unique ways of doing this. Just try finding a private place where you’re comfortable (I go into nature), and start talking to Him. Pretend He’s your councilor and best friend and tell Him all of your troubles and joys in life. I always ask Him only for guidance and I try to focus on the ways I see Him usually communicate with me. It usually happens through something called Synchronicity, something in nature catching my attention (animal / plant / wind) at specific times, or I will have random thoughts that lead me to the wisdom He’s imparting on me.
I know I’ve been going on too long, but I really think a relationship with God can transform you completely. I went from extremely socially anxious to someone who seems to attract people everywhere I go. Often times faith and spirituality come up without me even bringing it up. It was like God was waiting for me to get the wisdom from my years of suffering to be ready for what He had prepared for me next; to spread His Light. I realized how powerful this attraction He blessed me with was when I had a group of people talking and laughing while standing in line at the DMV. I talk about it in an upcoming video. If God’s Light can spread to a DMV line, it can spread anywhere! haha
@@lionsonthepath Thank you for your profound reply. I really appreciate your insight. Like you I enjoy getting out in nature taking walks and just trying to absorb what all is happening around me. I often feel closer to God in these instances. Even something as simple as a gentle breeze on a hot day while walking will trigger a thought where I will thank Him for that comfort. I love my parents dearly and don't consider it a burden to live with them and help out. I believe it is really important to find ways to be loving and helpful, whether it's towards people, animals, etc. You really can't find a substitute for that. That is part of the God-sized hole within each of us that cannot be filled with money, drugs, sex, etc. Some people that retire end up dying within a year or so because all of their self-identity is tied up to a job and routine revolved around that. They just feel empty, lacking purpose and without any type of direction in their lives. Even though I never married or had children I started sponsoring a girl from Bangladesh through the Christian ministry World Vision. I've been doing it for over 4 years now. Her name is Toma and she is 13 now. She doesn't speak English but we write letters and an intrepreter translates them for us. i feel so honored to be a blessing in her and her families life. I also feed some stray cats in my neighborhood and have been getting a lot of them neutered/spayed to cut down on the kitten overpopulation. I've been doing this for over 6 years now. I adopted a couple and have found homes for some of the kittens where the mothers didn't get spayed in time. A few years ago I bought a nice big dog house and filled it with straw to use as a shelter in the winter for some of the cats. I also converted over some larger cat carriers for the same purpose. A neighbor once saw the dog house and commented that he thought it was really `nice and "A God thing" that I was doing. I wasn't sure how to respond to that so I just thanked him. When I first started I had thought about quitting but something within me keeps driving me to help care for them at my own expense. I can't really explain it to be honest.
I think it’s amazing that you’re sponsoring that girl and working with the stray cats. Finding a purpose to help all living things is exactly what God wants us to do, each in our own unique way.
And having never married was the path that was chosen for you. We do need human connection, but we can get that in many ways. Serving others and striving to be more Christlike is the greatest reflection of God’s Love.
Hi Josh. Lots happening there today😅. Totally agree, one does not value whats given rather what one earns. And I have met the nicest school janitors and they make a good living IMO. I have respect for all doing those jobs. Someone has to do it.
It was quite the adventure today! 🤣
Society puts its focus on fame or who can give them the most stuff, but so many people who make the world go ‘round just slip through the cracks. I think the best of us are mostly down in the dirt. It’s a dark place, but it’s also where God’s Light shines the brightest.
If I didn't have my disability I wound have lost my Husband. Getting diagnosed with bipolar disorder, and finding the right meds, and therapy helped me to become a much better person. Thanks for the Video Josh. I had the flu the past week, so I'm catching up on your vids. Have A Beautiful Sunday with Your Family ✌️🙏
These tragedies that happen in our lives seem like such a curse, but they are just the harsh ways we must learn where we need to go. We truly must walk through Hell to get to Heaven.
Much love to you and your family. I’m so glad you are recovering and I am blessed that God connected us.
Perhaps having this channel is the most important thing you'll ever do in life. I'm sure that these talks that you give affect many people's lives in a positive way. God is not the slightest bit impressed by money, fame or power. Many in our society believe that those who have these things are somehow morally superior and that they've been blessed by God. I think that in fact quite often it's the opposite. Remember how Jesus was offered all the kingdoms of the Earth and their riches by Satan. These things all belong to the devil, yet that is what people strive all of their lives to attain. The meek shall inherit the Earth.
And He also said that it is easier for a camel to pass through a head of a needle than a rich man to get to Heaven. I never thought that I would be on TH-cam doing videos. I’ve always been a horrible speaker, whether in front of a crowd or a camera, and I’m not the prettiest to look at. Haha. But this has been one of the greatest blessings of my life.
We live in such an ugly, fallen world. As we’ve discussed, the internet is the culmination of the worst of humanity in one nasty place. But I think about how ugly the world has always been, especially in the times of Christ, and I understand why God made Himself flesh to give us this gift of unconditional love and Salvation.
He knows that His Plan depends on us having free will. It’s like I mentioned in the video; if you don’t work to earn something, you squander it. We have lived with this suffering and pain because we will learn to cherish the gifts of Love and Peace when we finally have been humbled enough to open our hearts to it.
I truly feel churches are vital for society, but I feel God is calling me to follow Christ’s teachings in substance and style. He was the poor carpenter who traveled where He was called to go, spreading His Light to the weak, poor, and oppressed first and foremost. This is what community in Christ means to me. Those of us who have fallen through the cracks in society are the ones who will be on the front lines in this war We must wage it with Peace and Love, and lift up our suffering brothers and sisters.
@@lionsonthepath Thanks for that brother. I do not belong to any church since I've never been able to find one that truly reflects Jesus love. I gave up on organized religion years ago. Sadly, in my experience I have found that most atheists seem to be more moral than a lot of Christians. Too often I see churches that drive people away from Christ.