5 Tips For Men Dealing With Heart Break
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 10 ธ.ค. 2024
- Unhealthy attachments to one woman are never a good thing, and lead to a condition called "oneitis" in this video I break down a few tips to help you deal with that better.
The five tips for men to avoid heart break
1) Men need to have friends & hobbies
2) Don't have an unhealthy attachment to one woman.
3) Don't rely on a woman for security
4) Understand that nothing is permanent in the world
5) Understand EVERYONE is replaceable.
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#Heartbreak #Oneitis
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I divorced early in february... she is the love of my life. But i had to cut the rope, her behavior was getting worse and when i called her on her bad behavior she did nothing to change, and gaslighting me.
Its hard i built my life where i live now when we marry, i dont know anyone here but ppl at work(woman all woman, theres very few males in my field), now with clear mind she isolated me, i dont know anyone oter than ppl she knew, and well they are with her.
It was very hard, but like you say, suffering its a choice, and has a men when you learn youre aways alone, everything gets better. For oters you are just a tool, when youre broken (in a bad spot) ppl will put you aside.
The way you see woman pseudo love its worth nothing. Shes alredy banging ppl and sending me messages. I love her but its not worth, im not a tool or a second opition. Ive not sleep with anyone becouse i dont feel the need for now, and i dont think my dick will work haha.
Well, the best thing to do its... find something to do... i began by cooking healthy and hitting the GYM like a animal. Now i notice how much time free i have, and ppl around me, my clients tell me im looking better and happy in comparison to before.
Great to know you have an Amazon influencer storefront, Rich. I am following it and I will buy products from it. I am wondering though, if I buy something from your storefront, say Mastery by Robert Greene, will you still get credit or your share of the proceeds if I buy it in a different format then what you have listed? (i.e. example: kindle or audible) Thanks, maybe you can answer that in your next video?
3:26 9:29 11:05
I had everything- good job, new rescue dog, exotic girlfriend and we just got a house. Very healthy relationship with no fighting. Within a month of getting the house my mom died(cancer is a bitch) grandpa passed 2 days after hearing the news. I fell into a funk for 2 weeks. I’ll be straight up guys- she never asked me if I was ok, always complained about work and never took anything that happened to me into consideration. Fast forward a week... she tells me I don’t make enough money and she wants to be happy again. Complete blindside. Best part is she says it will take her a very long time to heal. She broke lease and moved into an apartment. She had been planning this. I was homeless with my pup for 2 weeks until I found a place. No place accepts Pitt bulls so I had to rehome my boy. A week later I ran into the realtor who helped us find the house. He told me he saw my ex with someone new a week after she broke it off. They truly don’t care about you guys..they really only give a shit about what you can pay for them and the lifestyle you can give them.
Wow! That was brutal!
Brother I feel your pain. My ex and I were together for 5 years. She moved in after she got pregnant and never paid rent, she saved for the new dream house while I paid the bills. Fast forward I sell my house at a discount, so we can get our dream house. As soon as we moved into the new house her additude towards me completely change and shortly later files for separation. I asked her to work it out and she basically said she had doubts about us before we even purchased the new home...that's cold shit. At the end, lost my home, every other weekend visitation for my daughter, and I have a nice child support payment every month. Guess who got to keep the house. Woman are cold as hell; I literally carried her ass for 4 years, supported her career by staying home for 6 months to watch our daughter, and sold all my shit to get us the dream life. I won't even go into the blackmail and I will destroy your life shit she pulled during our separation. Courts only see a woman that is a victim. Just to give you an idea, I've never had any trouble with the law, don't drink, exercise and very physically fit, great secure job earning high salary... Still not good enough. Ps. Was extremely blue-pilled which is a big reason my relationship failed. Fellas listen to Cooper, following your own path and pursue your own dreams. A woman will only ever see you as a utility to be leveraged for their benefit.
As well, glad to hear you survived your separation ordeal. Be strong, learn, adapte, and survive.
Were you able to get your pup back? I'm hoping for a happy ending like Sylvester Stallone and his dog when he was homeless.
No, but I rehomed him with a terrific family that lets me see him any time in in their area so it’s a good arrangement.
I wish I had this 20 years ago when I went through a terrible case of One-itis. Great advice.
Better late than never brother.
Same. I wasted time. Back to chasing excellence.
I always like em with two tits. One-tits really sucks!
Been there in One-itis for the last 9 yrs bro, really sad, but now I can rebuild my self.
Same here.
Tips that help after breakup:
1. Write it out. Write a letter. Even if the person who the letter is intended to will never read it - your head will get much lighter
2. Go duck some other chicks. New positive experience will help to stop "idolising old trash". (In my case when I met my ex 6 months later I realised the pie never was as delicious as I praised it. That was the turning point. Never spoke since)
3. Block social media. Do not stay friends. Never look back
4. Be active. Doing physical stuff takes mental stress of grieving away
Good points to remember.....
Thanks
If you chase women rather than excellence, you deserve neither and you'll lose both
many chase both at the same time. the key is to let go of women who takes you away from your purpose.
Easier said than done, meu amigo.
Absolutely right.
Profound
@@wiseonwords certo!
Wow - I suffered from a heart break in my mid-20s for decades. What I didn’t understand was the true nature of women. Over decades I put the pieces together after one relationship after another. I never understood being a man after growing up without a father. This year I turn 60. Although my hopes for a family are long gone, I am working on parenting myself. These channels & discussions help.
Brother I wish you nothing but the best I been there man it’s exhausting and you get older quicker but fuck it we only live once i hope you get through all the hard things in life and become the best version of your self
You can for sure still have a family man. If you want one, make it happen. Best of luck to you.
Man... a VERY important topic. Too many men suffer in silence. I've been there. More than once. Some people could be just one bad day away from doing something drastic.
Your right I was feeling weak after a recent breakup I was going to text her ,so instead I called a friend who talked me out of it, so far so good ,her bad energy is not missed
@@DonaldGerbino Stay strong friend. It's not easy at all.
Men tend to self-isolate, it's shocking how few pals most men have, so guys let's push out of our comfort zones (bravely & not lazy) to Do The Work to build male friendships, as much for the other man, as for ourselves.
It does not matter what you do or how hard you try. It's always not going to be enough for her. One day she'll just decide she doesn't like you anymore and move on and destroy your life and everything you invested into the relationship.
Found this out the hard way
That Oneits can really mess you up. Don't catch it, wear a mask and stay 6 feet apart...
My friends wife left him recently.
I was really worried about him. I gave him a copy of The Rational Male.
I saw him recently and he said that he had been reading it and smiled. It must be relevant because he's not a big reader.
I'll keep checking in on him until he seems.... less likely to check himself out.
Good on you man. I’ve been destroyed before by this shit and all that got me through it were my bro’s, not my family, and not the side chicks. Only guys understand what guys are truly going through. Hope it all goes well with him.
The feels....
Good job, man. Glad to see guys support each other. Keep it up!
so your friend is okay now?
@@saymonm4563 Yes. I year after he is rebuilding his life. Gets his kids every second week. Has only recently started thinking about HIS life goals again. He's working lots. Paid off his ex. He's a free man 😊
I find the best way of getting over a breakup is to admit you have been addicted to drugs. Chemically, it's true. You've been addicted to this girl for however long and the longer you're addicted to something, the harder it is to walk away. You need to realize the only way to get over it and move on with your life is to let your brain rewire itself to not crave the dopamine release from this person anymore. Realize there really is plenty of fish in the sea and give yourself time to be upset with it, but stay busy. You'll feel it get better week after week, there just won't be that emotional response thinking about the person anymore.
Clever analogy. And true. Im going cold turkey on crack right now lol.
Once you experience heart break ,its easier to deal with if it happens again ,just remember she's going to leave you ,so you need to be the heart breaker ,love em then leave em ,"NEXT!"
Just love em like they love us ,treat them the exact same way they treat us ,you'll always be winning if you just walk away 0% bullshit policy
For anyone who’s ever conquered an addiction and understands how the brain works and how dopamine works this is 100% accurate.
As someone who is currently going through this, I found this video very helpful.
hang in there...it gets better...I have been there...
Same here bro...it is hard...but I am trying...
I’m going through it now..it’s tough..stay strong.. keep your head up!
This helps. Currently going through this myself. I was actually considering going back, until she pulled another stunt that she won’t admit to. She’s been keeping me hanging on until she can make the leap and lock-in a suitable replacement. She’s not going to. She was lucky to be with me. She’s finding out how valuable she really is now. Time to get to work.
Don’t forget, my brothers of the sword, YOU are the prize, not her.
When I’m feeling down about myself and I see all my friends coupling up around me, I come to Richard’s channel to validate my decision to remain a bachelor 😂💪🏼
Yes hahaha same here
Smart man. Rich is a great reality check.
stay up King
80-90% of married men are miserable, its not a good deal
Haha same
When you lose someone you love (or let them go), it's important to write up a detailed list of all the rotten, unloving, sick, hateful, petty things they ever did to you. Save it as a computer file for future reference. We tend to forget the bad and remember the good with time, so keep that list handy.
A man is tested when he has everything.
A woman is tested when a man has nothing.
My Ex cares when I was on top of my game for sometime, I had everything, nice car, great job, I was even had money saved up for a house in the CA, Bay Area I’m 24. Use it for a rental to pay it off. I work for my dad company and it’s 16-18 hours days 7 days a week in Hot conditions (AKA. Seasonal fire fighter). Life was good. Until hard time hit. I lost my best friend, my uncle died, my cat died, I got hurt on the job and counted work for a couple months, and my dad almost died destroying $250k in equipment. Not just hurting the business but I almost losted my dad. Yea life sucked. And I had this bi*** tell me I can help you, figure it out. I was there for her when she had hard time, but not The same. I said F it, have a good one and left that anchor. I’m not going to lie, this worked for me, get a new one, just go out and have fun, work on yourself here and there, but go out and fu** it’s the best way to get over a girlfriend is to have some new one 😎
@@AdrianaWhitney I have known very few women who helped a guy, was faithful, got him through his struggles, etc. and then got dumped. MOST women I have known really do wait at the finish line trying to snag a "winner". You deserved better. Hopefully, you found it.
@@AdrianaWhitney i don't believe a word :) smart men know that ladies that come here are what we called chameleons.
Focus on excellence and improving yourself. The best revenge is massive success. If you are reading this, you got this bro 😎
“She is not yours, it’s just your turn”
Or
“She is not yours, you’re just renting her”
And
“Like any rental item, it shows wear and tear and its value declines over time “
Thanks Rich!! Going through it now. Blindsided with divorce request. I am older, 57, she is now 44. Divorce coming after 8 years together. Once she got the child she wanted, and I went down a dark hole on self confidence, (lost job, starting new career, etc.). Was not chasing excellence in career and self. Had bad case of Oneitis, she was it. I clicked all the boxes you describe here. Thanks for getting me pointed in the right direction so I can start again.
This is a great topic Richard! There is a higher level of depression for men when they divorce than women. In reality men sacrifice more than women in relationships. I've seen men give up goals, dreams, their comfort, ambition in order to focus and invest their life in a women and when things are no longer convenient to her she'll bounce regardless of what he's done and sacrificed. Put yourself first always fellas because women already have.
It's not just blue pill programming....men have evolved over millions of years to be this way. I agree, this stuff is brutal for men.
Greetings from Poland! Big up! The man knows what he's talking about.
@John Smith Hahaha if they would be better, I wouldn't be here my brother. Respect!
@John Smith In my experience yes but I've recently noticed many younger Poles flirting with more 'progressive' gender roles
Greetings to you... and to the Polish girls!!
Rich, man, I wish I would have listen to you years ago. I have seen it all, I could write a book on everything I have done wrong. 56 now, in the middle of a divorce, saying thank you cause better late than never. I have seen the light. I have no bitterness. I just feel grateful that I will live the remaining part of my life in peace.
What is the worst with heartbreak is when you recover and you cringe about the dumb shit you did. Crying, begging etc. Going through a divorce was extremely painful but it was the reason I started my Redpill journey.
amen
You're definitely not alone on that. I tried everything to save my marriage and keep our family together (we have two sons), but her boredom won out in the end. Looking back, I was so pathetic, it literally makes me sick to my stomach to I think about it.
Amen 🙌🏻
Been there. Man, you look back and can't believe it was you that acted in this manner.
So true Samy, that low point in your life made you who you are today. Same happened with me
My daughter & business are the things I prioritise most in life - most other things are secondary.
Once you’re red-pilled, you realize there’s nothing to get over when a relationship ends.
When I am starting to feel oneitis for a woman, I go to the park with my musician buddies and we have a bad ass jam and then my only crush is my guitar and I feel much better.
I was turned onto your channel 2 days ago when I posted about my situation on a forum. I am very fresh out of an extremely toxic relationship(feared for my life 2 nights ago) and your videos have helped me immensely. She had BPD and combined with heavy binge drinking made for a very unhealthy relationship that left me empty. Thank you for talking about all of this, it has made a huge difference in all of this.
a woman leaving a man is a free gift, specially if there's no argument or confrontation. embrace it and bask in it. always give just enough in a relationship that its end causes zero distress. the only woman that unconditionally loves a man is his mother and yes, she doesn't care much for his father either.
King Richard dropping knowledge again. 50 year old over here ( never married no kids ) I look after # 1 ( Me ) i work out, have a great job, investment property, nice convertible. look & feel like late 30's , early 40's. Have known for years about the games bitches play, play the game back my brothers & spin those plates. Like Rich say's Do the work ! Look after # 1 Peace & greetings from Australia mate.
U not scared of lonliness and shit?
@@amit77 No not scared of being lonely. I have plenty of single friends that I hang out with. Work keeps me busy & I love working out at the gym. Like I said before, work on yourself, become a better person, get that promotion, run that extra mile, bitches come & go, remember she's not yours, it's just your turn. Don't make women your priority !
@@amit77 Its more of being alone and not so much being lonely
@@beeboy6967still single?
Hope you are still having and enjoying your life
Heart break is just one of those rights of passage. Once you've gone through it you come out on the other side changed but definitely wiser. I've heard people say they've never had their heart broken and to me that means they've never experienced a deep love. As trite as it sounds time does heal all wounds.
If you're heart is broken it proves the opposite of having experienced "deep" love. It proves that you were duped, and would have been better of for not believing in the deep love BS.
@@benderrodriquez You're entitled to your opinion. I'm not trying to change anyone's opinion because arguing on FB is akin to shouting into the abyss. Peace.
Edit: Arguing on You Tube or FB is akin to shouting into the abyss.
@John Smith FACTS
Channel does not only help with understanding the relationship between people but also gets you focused on important aspects of man's life such as long life purpose. Really appreciate your work Rich!
Time invested means nothing to women simply because they always have options. The moment you become someone they don't want, they will drop you. After I found this out, dating and break ups have become easier. There is no ONE, she is not special.
You don’t build equity with women.
greetings from Germany. It happened to me 6 years ago, I was at the bring of madness because of a "one". I recovered and learned my lesson. Richard is 100% Right.
14:03 Dumped my X, moved to a new place closer to a better paying job, 14:38 while rotating younger, thinner, better, looking Girls, through my door.
16:03 "Competition anxiety"
is great for keeping girls on their best behavior.
14:50 "abundance mindset"
X lost it when I said I didn't want to even consider taking her back!
Good man, keep crushing it
“Men have to do a lot more... and get a lot less in return.” Please do a video on that! That phrase just made a lot of things click in my life. 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Hobbies are key. Also as much as it hurts toss the shit that reminds you of them. I was hanging onto some gifts and photo frames I stored in a closet. One day finally decided to toss it all and felt so much better.
Good morning Rich. Thanks for always dropping this free content. You are handing out gold to those willing to listen.
Excellent wisdom that "Nothing is permanent". As someone who is about to turn 40, there were SO many times in my life that I thought things would be permanent. Great friends, great girlfriends, nice family members, etc. And looking back, almost none of that was constant. Cherish the good times! It might seem like your best friends will be there forever, but yeah...
Outstanding video! Speaking as a recovered statistic of "one-itis", the biggest factor for recovery for me was having friends and hobbies. Within that "one-itis" relationship, all of the hobbies I enjoyed like shooting sports, fishing, weight-lifting went by the wayside. Rediscovering those hobbies and reconnecting with my friends who enjoy them were key to putting her firmly in my rearview mirror.
Those are fun, Motorcycles are too... I've got 3!
26 years together…..
25th wedding anniversary this coming 9/27….
Divorce date set for 9/14…..
Blindsided by “I want to get separated”…….
Thought about cashing out the night she hit me with it,”thought” about it…..
No way would I have acted on it….
Actually woke me up to my codependency that I never realized I had……
Still hurts like hell, but I’ve put all my energy into my business and relationship with my adult children
Fuck that…..
After my 6 years relationship broke down I took a walk of over 1000 miles across Europe to sort my shit together and now each time oneitis threatens I deal with it much faster and come out much stronger.
Thanks for making this video.
How did you do that?
After a long life of relationships, marriage, divorce, breakups, etc. I have to say that this guy's advice is CORRECT. I wish I had this guy telling me this when I was a young man starting out. But, I was so stubborn that I probably would have not listened...and learned things "the hard way". Young guys, don't do what I did. Take this guy's advice. It sounds harsh and unromantic at times...but it is correct.
I needed that... I've been going back to the curb and rummaging through the garbage for 6 years now. I was married for 35 years and never thought this would happen with my "new" woman. An operations manger of mine once told me, "No mater what it is... NEVER GO BACK!" That was 30 years ago. and I need to move on!
I suffered from a oneitis 10 years ago. We started being friends and as years went by I developed feelings towards her. She noticed and took advantage of me as I was unable to say NO.
The only reason I had a oneitis is because I didn't have more options. After months of feeling like a like a muppet I decided that I didn't want to see her again.
I felt liberated. I started to get in shape, started to go out with friends and my cousing and after 2 months and no longer thought about her anyomore.
So, if you have a oneitis I suggest you improve yourself so you have other options and as Rich says, have hobbies and friendships.
Stay strong men!
Unfortunately I went through this 4 years ago.
Rich it was tough and strange.
Definitely didn't find your channel until after Reading Rollo book 2 years ago.
Glad that you are discussing this topic which so happens more often.
Been Single 4 years now, have no interest in getting married or LTR or dealing with a slew of crazy women out in this world.
I do Chase excellence daily which is a full task and choice every man should do and consider if never been married before.
Thanks for the video
Glad you got out from from underneath it.
I’m quite the opposite. I found Rollo’s book by stumbling on Rich’s channel. Rich is like the father that I never had
Thank you for the awesome content. I lost my wife of 36 years to cancer. This wisdom applies to my experience too. I applied the same strategies to chase excellence and help me understand the new world. It has helped me work through my loss without making any big mistakes, to include the one mentioned here.
Toxic relationship endings do make a person feel the lowest they will likely ever feel in their lives.
18 years old so not necessarily the target audience of a lot of these topics, however it’s great to learn from people like Rich’s experiences so i don’t make the same mistakes. great content man
As a several time victim of One-Itis, I must thank you for articulating these truths. Thinking back on my life, I find myself looking up to the sky and shouting "MY KINGDOM FOR A TIME MACHIENE"! But, while the past is gone forever, the game isn't over. Life goes on - until it doesn't.
Again, thank you.
Going through difficult time now. Wife wants a divorce, 9 years married. 2 kids. She has turned to ice. Best advice I've seen and heard to help me overcome this.
Keep pushing mate was in the same position 3 years ago stay strong 💪
Thanks Rich, but no more dealing with heart breaks since started watching your vidoes.
I’m not crying because she left, I’m crying because she wants to come back!
I was with my Ex for 9 months,she was a single mom. Things went bad for me so I lost my house and my car in a car accident, so when I told her I dont have the house any more ,she broke up with me 2 days later by a text massage.i am doing well again and learned my lesson.
@Dr.'sorders I agree from personal experience.
Thanks heaps, you've basically told me a lot of things about myself that I really have not wanted to address.
I trying to clear my head and soul from heart ache pain, it really lingers on.
how screwed YT became when you cannot say a certain words...... crazy.
It's progressive and brave
@@VikingTarzan lel
The trauma i experienced 6 months ago from my breakup led me to find this channel. Your videos have helped massively Richard, and i also read "The Rational Male" which you recommended and that was really the eye opening moment that helped me make sense to all the chaos. Keep spreading this positive message! We need it!
I think Terrence Popp coined that phrase "permanent solution to a temporary problem". Great phrase--I've used it several times for guys I know going thru this, helping them walk those thoughts back. I point these guys to you and Terrence to help them. To you Richard for thoughtful and directed solutions, and then to Terrence for comedic relief and a different approach.
Thats a commonly used expression. It means committing su*c*de
@@symbungee I'm aware of the meaning. I just didn't know how commonly used it was. Thanks!!
It's like endurance training the more times your heart is shattered the more resilience you'll have just be kind to her and yourself we are all far far far from perfect
Perfect timing as usual Rich, really needed to hear this rn. It’s been 2 months since my heartbreak but seeing your ex on social media is deceiving and can send you into a relapse. Appreciate the content.
Endless Nameless Endless, you’re exactly right. It’s amazing how much of that horrible twisted feeling that young men feel after a break up that is the idea that they are missing out on something ‘beautiful’ that they once had. When you see that figure of beauty 15 years later and she looks excitingly average you realise how much of your love and devotion was wrapped up in pure physical attraction and nothing else or next to nothing else. If you take that away and just leave the personality most women‘s ‘personality’ especially these days is appalling . It’s Because they’ve never had to try, they rarely heard the word ‘no’ They have never had to develop a personality and there’s an inverse relationship between personality and beauty. The more attractive they are the more dysfunctional personality normally is. With very few exceptions. I look at some of my girlfriends in my 20s and how they appear now and I say to myself ‘my god how did you put up with that nonsense’ ? And there’s a very simple answer and it’s between your legs and hers.
Another great video. I cannot tell you the number of years I fretted about rejections and or relationships (which were normally very short) that were lost. Years later, for many of those losses, I realize it was for the best; and better some other man can deal with the nonsense from those women.
The truth of the matter lads is that women are only pleasant distractions. Nothing more, nothing less.
Are you willing to lose everything just to know if she really, really loves you for who you are, regardless of material goods? I don't think so, and I think you know that as well.
After some life experience you become (or should become) less attached.
"Man suffers only because he takes seriously what the gods made for fun (imagine two young women in bikinis kissing each other, wink wink)."
Amen brother! We've all been there before. I'm chasing my dream which is improving myself.
I've been through enough breakups , this advice is brilliant ,end of
Really good advice. I’m divorced and if i found a channel like this 10 years ago i wouldn’t have gone through such a rough time during my divorce or gotten married in the first place.
So true. Great words again. Sometimes i wish it was 50 years ago people had nothing but we was much happier.
You helped me through a very tough breakup last year. Keep up the good work Rich
I've been developing one-itis for a girl who did nothing wrong and was amazing with me. She had like almost 10 of the red flags on your chapter including BPD. That's why as I got closer and closer with her I felt more and more pain because I knew it was a bad idea. I had to pull back and its really hard to get her off my mind. We casually saw each other for 4 mnths. Leaving someone like that who hasn't really done anything yet is INSANELY hard.
hey how are u feeling now with the breakup?
Don’t chase the EX, chase EXCELLENCE
Very good tips, Rich. I had a terrible case of oneitis when I was 20. I almost followed the same path as this gentleman but I'm really happy I took my mind off the issue and decided to work on myself.
A much needed video. I appreciate you taking this on. Unfortunately, many of us men are not conditioned to deal with life in a masculine way. Gynocentric structures-- such as schools and single mother households-- lead to the feminization of men. This video unfortunately highlights the most severe outcomes of this system.
I remember the last time, really the only time, I completely lost my head over a break-up with a woman. I was going to Syracuse U working that summer in an ice-cream plant. I suppose my pouting was plain to see, I am ashamed to admit in retrospect. This old-timer, Bob P. was his name, pulled me aside in the main production room and said, "I'm going to tell you something, I want you to think about it, and never forget it. Once you eyes start rolling they're all the same." After work that evening i chilled out with a six-pack of Bud and thought about her and what he said. I ended up laughing so hard I almost hurt myself. Never again did I lose my head over a women. Thanks Bob P. R.I.P.
What a service you are providing. I just found it too late in life. I suffered "oneitis" twice in my life and one nearly did me in. I did just the opposite of what you recommend to do. First and foremost I walled myself off from friends, family, traditions and hobbies. The only thing I did right was that I went full gusto into exercise. I worked out so hard that I now recognize it was like a form of self-punishment. Exercise is great and does wonders for your emotional state, body and mind but when it becomes so sadistic that your body starts to revolt and actually breakdown, you know this activity is more than just "exercise." I don't consider myself a needy person. I have a strong sense of worth and general confidence. Never in a million years would I suspect that I would fall into this pit not once but twice. The first certainly more intense than the later (did I learn something from the first?)
Anyway, thank you for what you are doing. I just wish I would have had this advice 18 years ago.
Ultimately the best thing to do is always maintain our emotional independence, aka, never catch feelings. The tips you mention Rich are good ways to help prevent catching feelings. Understand women aren’t capable of loving us the way we do them. Men love idealistically and women love opportunistically (what we can do for them.) This makes remaining emotionally independent much easier.
Greetings from India. I have been in 3 LTR before. The last relationship ended a month back. It was very harsh on me because I had put a lot of effort to make it work for close to 8 years and it ended because I didn't wanted to marry and was happy with the way things were going between us. So she simply said that I cannot continue with you. Suddenly all of the love and care stopped from her side. I didn't even recovered from it and she said she is going to marry someone else shortly. I feel my mistake was to probably make her wait for so long.
What I have learnt is that relationships are highly conditional and transactional.
First of all, there is not woman alive who is worth dying for.
One of the most useful things I learned to say to myself: "I know everything about her that I need to know." Once you realize that the relationship is not going to work, for whatever reason, any further effort you put into that relationship is a waste of time money and your mental health. You don't need to know why the relationship didn't work, only that it did not work. It does not matter who ended the relationship. Once you understand that the relationship won't work, you know everything you need to know.
Tj Streak TJ I like your pragmatism!
Keep moving!! Work-out. Work hard. Occupy your mind with productive pursuits. Cry when you need to. Eat well. Get as much sleep as you can. Drink less.
Good advice bro
In my experience, you just learn how to deal with it over time. What do i mean? I've had a lot of heartbreaks with relationships. And when it happens to you a lot, you tend to recover real quick when you go through a break up.
I was 41 when my 2nd divorce hit me, i decided to retake up boxing. Best thing a man can do. You channel the rage and get fitter, endorphin rush and look awesome as a by product. Confidence returns quickly, you meet new people and earn your self respect back. Then you realise that you're better off without the ex wife anyway.
My ex did me dirty and I did this exact thing without even knowing any RPstuff and now I’m a savage
#3 Don't rely on a partner for security, comfort or physical touch... This needs to be better explained. Especially the physical touch aspect. The first two are subjective and everyone has different needs. Seeking physical touch however, is probably the main reason most men get into a monogamous relationship. When that part of a relationship ends, so does the partnership. So my question is; Why get into a partnership/relationship with a woman if we shouldn't rely on them for physical touch?
Exactly
Men and women today can never have a successful and ever-lasting marriage, let alone even a strong relationship as our grandparents did because we have ZERO character, zero spirit of sacrifice and love, we are selfish and only seeking self-gratification. The breakdown of a person's character, is the breakdown of family and this has all been done by DESIGN.
oy vey....but by who?? °¿°
yes.. 😥😞
Oh,damn, I recently met a European woman and I've ACTUALLY referred to HER as possibly being my "soul mate." I GUESS I'd better re-think that!!
Please my friend do , I really mean it , it fucked my life up with that mentality
Brother, my ex pretended to be a great girl. She moved in my house and we started a family. Fast forward 5 years later, no house, child support payments, and having to start from scratch. Remember, it's 50/50 chance it'll work and most guys I know that are married are not happy. If I could turn back the clock, would of played bachelor to my dying day.
@John Smith
Ukrainian women are legendary; I've been hearing stories about them forever!! Since they're often very attractive - in addition to being VERY manipulative and financially-challenged - it makes for a deadly combination!! I DEFINITELY don't want any of that action!!😀
@@charlies.5777 My good friend lived in a certain housing development with a lot of young people. At the pool area there was a fairly hot Russian woman. My buddy had pretty good game so he picked her up. He was schtooping her solid for about a month and suddenly she said he had to go because her husband was coming back from Russia.
A smart man once said “there is no ONE”. Don’t fall into the soul mate myth.
Awesome video. We men need a reality check once in a while to understand why these things happen to us in relation to women. Thanks.
Worked with a guy who's wife was cheating on him, he also had a kid with her, he ended up taking his own life when he found out she was cheating....
Similar to a guy I heard about, married a foreign woman and she only wanted him to move from her poverty country (honduras) and he found out she was cheating and then he committed suicide. It's sad that these women won't even have remorse for this.
@@gold1736 very sad....
@@chriskelly509 Yeah bro, shits sad. The redpill literally saves lives but people always dismiss it.
They have about as much remorse as Max Cady in Cape Fear
I've had my first heartbreak, last year, in my 40s so I admit I thought I was kind of immune to this feeling... I was wrong. One time I was so overcome with grief I could have done the stupid "permanent solution" (BTW what is with all this TH-cam censorship? Damn). It goes way beyond the woman though. It's an image of her and of the common future we have built in our own minds, it's the dopamine hits we lose from the stuff we liked that she did, etc. That's why it's sooooo intense, and also why when it wears off we can't believe we acted that way. Hang in there, bros. It WILL pass, even though you'll have your awful down moments for a while. The thing is, it's easier to deal with it if you replace her, but as we Red Pill men know, seeking LTR is NOT good anymore. If it happens, maybe. But don't seek it out. The downside is that you think about your ex longer.
Amen. hope you're doing well
Not sure there is an issue with thinking "She completes me." It's when one thinks "She is the only person in the world who can complete me" that's the problem. It's like going out for a meal. Be confident that you can go out alone and its fine. You are enough. You don't need external validation. But if you are in the company with someone who you care for there is a feeling that this completes the experience.
I think "compliments me" is the optimal thing. "Completes me" implies you're missing something of yourself without a girl in your life. I disagree. Make your life, yourself a purpose where you feel complete - and then you can invite so called 'love' into your life. Because partners aren't Disney movie characters that stick with you through "thick and thin", when shit goes down, the VAST MAJORITY (there are few exceptions) is willing to look somewhere else, instead of helping you up, if they get the opportunity to.
I would add that if you are a man that is very empathetic and loving by nature, work on being distant and unattached to women EVERY DAY. It surprisingly will not only protect you from life destruction, but it will actually ATTRACT women....it's a win-win.
This comes very handy. I was recently monkey branched and it really sucks
Same, how u going now man? How long was the healing process?
@@23pyromaniac Mine was about 6 months. Getting so much kitty now bro
My ex wife did that to me.. ofcourse the guy hit it and quit it... but we're both 30 and I'm hitting up 23 year that look and feel alot better..
Thanks for this vid, needed it af,
I'm my early 20s so I'm hella grateful for these tips
Just got out of a 2 year relationship and am suffering big time . I understand red pill concept but it's difficult for me to implement because I'm older and was hoping she would be the one I could grow old with. It was a rollercoaster ride, almost split up multiple times before this . most of the time she was playful, fun, easy but every once in a while she did a 180. now, i'm trying to accept and move on by focusing on all the things i didn't like but the things i love can't be forgotten. UGH !
Did this get any better?
Wow...I’m going through heartbreak now smh...
Am sorry be strong
Rich, great content. I found your channel looking for answers after I broke up with my girl a month ago, I still miss her a lot but I haven't regret one sec that I let her go, she was very selfish, always forgetting important things about us, always bringing negativity, very toxic environment with her, she didn't allow me as a man to take care of things, we were not aligned... I need some advices about how to forget her once for all. Thanks
Yep, I ditched everything and everyone and made her the most important and only person in my life. After 22 years, and 4 kids, she reveals that she never was and never will be attracted to me. WTF?!
treat her like a queen she'll treat you like a fan
I appreciate this video. I found this channel and some others after I tried to take permanent steps to end a temporary problem. Thankfully I was able to be saved in time. She was actually the one to call for help when she found out what I'd done, but every interaction since I returned from the hospital has been hell. I finally decided to just stop contacting her and move on.
Unfortunately, I lost nearly all of my friends and my biggest hobby because of what happened. They treat me like a pariah and won't even respond when I need help. I've taken to doing cardio every day plus lifting weights three days a week, but I can only do that so much. It's one day at a time, one hour at a time. At least I've got my home and my business.
I can make it really easy for you guys out there struggling with the end of your relationships. Here it comes.....
She won't care about you one iota.
You'll mean absolutely nothing to her - in fact less than.
All the things you did for her, the self sacrifice, the hard work, the love, the care, the time......it matters not. She won't give a damn.
She'll be off getting something going with another bloke in less than 48 hours. And she'll think of you no more.
So......... You have to ask yourself, why are you wasting one second hurting over her?????????!!!!!!!!
Move on. And you'll be happier instantly. Guaranteed!!!!!
Thanks for the video, Rich. Hanging around with men is also fundamental to help with feminization aka raised by a single mother
Excellent video R. I really appreciate how this channel has helped me recover and improve my image post divorce. Thank you!
Dr. M.
This would have been great info back in my high school days. My friend, Shawn, ended his life because the girl he was with no longer wanted to be together.
Great video, Rich
Take that pain and grow from it
Men have hobbies, women have their boyfriends. Fundamental difference.
oooffff lol