I thought the same. While I'm not much of a poetry fan, Thoreau* is one of the few that genuinely clicks with me, as I find his vocabulary and style (generally) inspirational and (universally) witty/clever. *: Henry David Thoreau is primarily known as a poet of the Transcendentalist subgenre, though he was a man of many talents. I rather admire him, as he seemed to *never* simply take the easy path for it's ease. Pardon the rant. Mild Thoreau Fanboi.
@@paulpolito2001 I like Poetry, but what I hate is when I'm not able to understand because of big fancy words being used (or if not that, then perhaps the word play is way tricky and complex). In general though, I definitely like Metaphors.
@@tauhid9983 it means that *time is always ticking; whereas if it could be killed, then it would stand still* (imagine everything being frozen in time, because time would no longer be ticking). Therefore, you can't kill time without injuring eternity.
Dude i was bad into it i would waste hundreds on those cam girls with vibrator toys u pay to activate. You can do it. Just remember theres better things to do with ur time like looks for a real life mate 🤣
I'm not particularly religious but I realized 5 years ago that pornography and porn addiction is really destructive on a number of levels. This is a serious issue for young men and really important to talk about in this modern era of instant gratification and hedonism and lack of boundaries. Thanks for talking about it Ramsay!
@@iisnipezii4352 started when you were ten and continued for 3 years? Are you only 13? If so you should wait until you hit your 20's then see the true negative effects
Time - it is strange how people are prepared to spend a lot of money and little time to get surgery to 'look good', rather than spend less money and more time to exercise to look AND feel good. Exercise body, mind and spirit...
When I tell the kids at my school that I have never watched pornography, they look at me like I’m crazy, and I feel, like you said, that sexuality has become all too separated from interpersonal relationships and attached to instant personal gratification
I stopped watching that kind of stuff for a recent fight camp (for the most part I gave in once a week or so) and it really made a difference in the camp. I was just ready to murk my opponent, his corner, the ref, and his mom if she got in the way. I lost, but had the best performance I have ever had to this date, and I partially credit the tenacity while training, and the lessening of fear before the fight to the lack of that kind of thing in my life. I lost the fight because of a freak injury after wiping the canvas with him for the entire fight. Next time I'm not even going to allow myself to give in once per week. It really does help guys.
You know the old trope where the nervous highschool guy gets with the girl, and when it comes to the moment of truth, she looks at him and says, "Is it in?" The first time I had sex with my girlfriend, the roles were reversed. She was overwhelmed while I was still convinced that I had missed again. Porn (and the associated behavior) takes away from you a lot, including the ability to enjoy its natural form. No one tells you this stuff, and it strikes us when we're young, vunerable, and have parents who think it's too early to warn us about it, if they're even aware about it at all, themselves.
You just being you is going to offend someone eventually. Learn, be kind, but don't take guff and try to choose your battles wisely. Blind altruism is just as dangerous as selfishness. That's all a good person can do. Some things come easy, some you have to work on. I had to work on choosing my battles wisely. I still am in some ways, but if I'm alive I'm still learning and always getting better. Great vid, cheers from Chicago! 👍🏻
These videos made me understand that you, Mr. Dewey, are not a coach just on the fighting sense; as in you're also a great "life coach" or something, it's a bit hard to express what I mean but I'm sure you get it . Just this sane/sober, wise approach to things and etc I guess. I've learned a lot from you, and I'm sure I'm not alone in this. Thanks for the consistently great content, I admire you a lot! Much love and respect, all the best to you and yours! Cheers
Being older and hopefully wiser I am not here looking for this advice but at the same time I like the fact that people are asking these questions and I enjoy hearing his advice/answers. Looks like RD is finding another niche.
You always seem to release videos at the time I need them most. I stumbled upon your Aikido video several years ago and realised that I NEEDED to exercise - rather to get strong. I was sick of being weak. Well, I got strong (or at least stronger :P), but apparently only physically. I realised I was addicted to porn about a month ago...the process of quitting is far harder than anything I'd anticipated. Thank you for this video, Ramsey. The perspective that you offer is incredible. Not trying to bloat your ego, but your wisdom has seriously inspired me several times. I'm trying to be the man, I'm trying to be strong, but I find myself slipping back to the status of monkey time and time again. Something I've learned in life however, is that there is rarely a limit to the amount of times you can try. So that's what I'll do. I'll keep trying until I succeed. Thanks so much for this man, really. I'm not religious in the slightest, but God bless
Spot on about porn, it makes sex like fast-food and bad for us. As Eddy Bravo says look into it. Real talk, mad respect as always coach. I'm an atheist, but I wish more people could speak and represent Christianity (anything else as well) the way you do. You do it with respect and thought. Thank you brother for your insight and respect. I always learn from the Coach. Much love and hope to all from Michigan, stay safe. You're helping me grow with your insights. Peace out
When you give your power to, or become a slave to an "image", the Bible calls that idolatry. Thou shall not make an idol or image..... Jesus tells his followers to die to self daily. Take up your cross and follow Him. Don't listen to your instinct, "flesh". But rather give up your bodies in the service of Christ. The apostle Paul repeatedly called himself a slave to Christ. Thanks Ramsey
It's a big commitment however if you avoid eating meat, pepper, garlic, and onion you will be able to transform your sexual energy into energy your body and mind can use for training and life. It will also reduce the urge for sex and porn which may help you. Try it, it's helped me although I've never been addicted, I'm doing it for semen retention and training focus. Edit: for example before I couldn't go a week without jerking off but now I've completely stopped and am able to completely focus on self improvement. It's been a month so far and I've hardly felt the urge for sex, let alone porn.
@@wildrain8602 What is even the motivation to not masturbate even not once in a week when there are difference beneficies doing it? Really, and it's free and won't kill you if you don't make it psycothic.
@@michaelguth4007 its not the time taken masturbating. internet porn fries your brain. there NOTHING your brain enjoys more than jerking off to porn other than actually banging the girls you see. It plays into binge psychology and fries your hippocampus, making it harder and harder to enjoy anything else. look up some ted talks on the neuroscience of it. its quite terrifying. the idea of no fap going from hunter to hunted very quickly against porn.
This is gold mate, my thoughts exactly. Instincts say one thing, mind the other. May I and others fight for taking our free will, strength, power and volition back.
Very profound message. I wouldn't be surprised if you RD, have a special calling for the ministry. The truth is out there if one sincerely and wholeheartedly seek it. Thanks!
One of the greatest favors I do to myself is to spend the half hour commute post and pre training listening to these friutful questions and answers, I value your ideas and outlooks on life and it definitely helps me grow day by day, I hope to one day get the chance to send a question to spark that great mind of yours, keep spreading the love, OSS
Dude, I came across you randomly when researching martial arts as I decided to join a school at 35 to try to get in shape in a fun way. So never heard of you before, and damn… I’m on an entirely different journey, you’ve been like a life coach to me in just a few short weeks! Thank you for what you do! Blessings sir! Now, I’m gonna go out… and train…
On the topic of doing things instead of regretting: some desires won't fade over time, and you'll just end up older having lost time you could have spent on doing the thing.
Right now, Ramsey is not only seen as an MMA coach, but also as someone who shares his knowledge and thoughts in a very logical way. That's good, it opens up the channel for more questions and answers on various subjects.
Started watching because of the martial arts content, stayed because of "all the other stuff" (psychological/philosophical/religional). Regarding that "toxic masculinity" stuff, it really makes sense when considering how some of the ancients (like Aristotle) talked about the virtues (courage and all the other personal qualities that make someone a good person). As Aristotle discusses it, true courage (the virtue) is a "golden means" between two extremes - "too little" courage (cowardice) and "too much" courage (I think the English term is "foolhardiness" - taking unnecessary risks. If there's a burning building, the one with "the proper amount" of courage runs in to save grandma, the one who lacks courage won't run in at all, and the one with "too much" courage runs in just to show off. There is, of course, a discussion of you can ever have "too much" courage, since courage is a virtue, and so by definition, already the middle ground between two extremes. So we have to use "courage" here in two ways - once for the virtue, and again for what looks like it and shares some characteristics with it, but isn't quite it. And that (so it seems to me) is the case with "toxic masculinity". If there wasn't a word like "foolhardiness" (or whatever the Ancient Greek equivalent is), Aristotle might well have made up a new term - "toxic courage". Seems to me, it's much the same case with "toxic masculinity" - although yes, some people are really starting to use it now to just mean that being "traditionally masculine" is in itself toxic.
Man Ramsey. You continue to drop valuable gems of wisdom to me that I don’t seem to find anywhere else, at least not as eloquently and plainly as you put them. I actually broke out into tears during this because there were a couple of lines that you said that really carried weight in my own life. You might never realize the kind of help and guidance that you’re giving to people, especially young males (like myself), but from the bottom of my heart I want to tell you thank you for sharing your mind with others. I’m so very grateful for your time. Thank you so much. I hope you and your family are well. God bless you, Coach. 🙏🏼
I wish we had a Ramsey Dewey when drugs are depicted as something entertaining and fun or when the wise ones who spoke truth about their effects where mocked and considered old-fashioned/moralizers.
There's a cost for every action, more extreme the action, higher the cost. We must always weight the benefits to cost, in most cases our actions can and will affect others for better or worse. I.e. someone wants nothing more than to hurt themselfs or others in one way or another obviously hurt everyone connected,or invested in you. Ramsey saying to do what you want is only good advice if the actions are good. Being a " people person" is simply always putting others before yourselfand thats not a bad thing, the key is to not let people run over you, or take advantage of you good nature. As for pornography, it should be treated as drugs or gambling, its super easy to do, its very pleasing to do but hard to stop. So moderation it everything. However its effects are subtle at 1st, it changes your expectaions for sex and behavior. It warps your mind, and the more of it you watch the harder it is to reverse, or unsee. I normally dont comment on youtube, but this video hit close to my heart for i have stuggled for years with porn addiction, and i have been raised to be a "people person".
There is so much that goes into this second topic because of how complex it is. I disagree with certain aspects of your perspective but I definitely agree with you and relate on a lot of it. I believe moderation is the most important form of lifestyle conscious choices because of the negativity that can come out of simple everyday tasks such as eating and relaxing.
you asked if any coffee addicts remember their first cup, well yes I do, I was a freshman in college and since I was a grown up I decided to get a coffee since that's something grown ups do, I had no idea how coffee worked so I ordered espresso because that sounded cool, double shot because more is better. I was shaking throughout several class periods,
Bad behavior is neither masculine or feminine, you get dip-shits on every side of the gender line. But every so often you get someone who really seems to understand that people are good, bad, and indifferent. Thank you for sharing your philosophy.
One who focuses on external validation will never find internal validation. They will simply be a product of the "crowd"... better hope you are around a phenomenal crowd. You will never lead just follow.
False. Many people are built by the crowd, as you imply towards the end; but are exceptional - regardless of its nature. Not everyone can lead, nor should they. To follow, is to trust and as noble as anything else.
Woah I’m studying modern dance now, limon, Cunningham, Graham, techniques. I started to study Muay Thai a few months ago bc of the similarities between the movement forms. Your videos further demonstrated the similarities. So cool to know your background!
My Randall stack amplifier is surrounded by posters of guitar heroes and I'm very hard on myself for not being where they were at 31.. MMA training has given me healthier perspective on this but your words on desensitization resonate very powerfully on that.
The harms of pornography go way beyond negative effects on the lifestyle of men. The demand for pornography fuels rape, sex trafficking, rape of children, exploitation, and the monetization of all of the above. You will never know if the porn you are watching is consensual. You will never know if the people involved both gave their permission. You will never know if that young person is actually a child.
Actually this is not entirely true... countries with access to porn tend to have better sex education and vice versa... look at which countries are the most guilty of sex exploitation, those are usually the most conservative in the world, be it countries in the middle east, or poland, or others. I definitely see the point that like with everything, there should be limits. Some people can have a pint of beer and enjoy it. Others should not even come close to alcohol, since it will immediately start up addction patterns. I think pornography is similar. There is a huge difference in consuming something once in a while out of curiosity, or beating it eight times a day. I concede your point, that porn industry is full of shit and recent pornhub purge on unregistered videos shows the scale of the problem. This is the problem. Not the genre itself, but the exploitative industry. Similar to how people say that religion is not the problem, but church is - same logic. If regulations were enforced strongly, you might end up with less shitty industry, spreading sex positivity among consenting adults, which is not a bad thing. Currently, that is far from truth and I agree with you on this point.
There was a meta-analysis study done that looked at the many studies of the effects of porn on people and more than 95% of those studies had to be thrown out because they weren't conducted properly, and among the studies that were left, there wasn't any conclusive evidence that porn was bad for people. Also, I know this is pedantic, but an important point about addiction is that if someone is addicted and you take away the source, they'll experience either physical withdrawal, emotional withdrawal or both. As an example, if power goes out and the person knows they won't be able to watch porn and they start stressing out because of it, like they need their 'fix' and they know they won't get it, that would fit the description of an addiction. This happens with cigarette smoking but I haven't heard of this when it comes to watching pornography (I could be proven wrong). As a last note, just because something (usually) doesn't fit the definition of an addiction, doesn't mean it can't have a negative impact in someone's life. You are right that watching pornography takes time, time that could be better spent doing something else. We could say the same thing about watching TV or playing video games (and some do say the same things about TV and video games), my point is only that I don't think it fits the description of an addiction. In any case, you're one of the few people I know who can have the exact opposite opinion I have while still keeping my attention and having me fully hear you out. I agree with you 99% of the time and I'll always respect your opinion the 1% of the time when I disagree. Edit: I was halfway through the video and it seems you are very well aware of the 'fix' thing I mentioned. As I mentioned a bit higher up, that would definitely fall in the category of addiction, but as I said, I read a lot of people claiming they are/were addicted to porn but I've never seen confirmation that they actually experienced those feelings. If porn addiction exists, it definitely doesn't affect most people because most people don't describe that. I agree about coffee by the way, my roommate has withdrawal symptoms if she doesn't drink coffee for a single day. She drinks a ton of coffee
One of the most compelling speeches on porn. We are so vulnerable, because porn is legal almost in every country in the world. There are no restrctions and you are a few click away from kinky stuff far beyond your imagination. If you fight this new drug, seek professional help or try no fap community. Be strong and never give up.
As good as you are at martial arts, i feel like this is where you shine. Ur a good dude 💪 not that u need me to tell you that. But you have a gift of gab, as big as your gift for violence 😊
I'm on my first week of celibacy throughout this quarantine. Girlfriend broke up with me at the start of the lockdown, been having mental struggles and moral dilemmas on stopping to beat the meat. But since I've been improving my fitness journey, learning martial arts, I have the motivation to distract myself away from the momentary pleasures I used to do. Also, a group of primates are also called troops, coach Ramsey.
I went to a massage class as a total newbie and it was actually a master teaching teachers. And as long as i acted like a teacher, people where impressed. So a guy asked me how long i had thought for and i told them that today was my first day as a student. Ever. Boy the guy got mad. But the master said "he is here, let him be here" I'm glad i told the truth because it was hard to perform at that level.
I have two questions that I’d like answered: (1) I’ve been thinking a lot lately about various MMA practitioners saying that TMAs “don’t work.” But it really seems like the evidence that is put forward for this is that these TMAs have not been successful in MMA competition. Does that really prove that they don’t work? It may prove that they aren’t the *most effective* styles, or even that they are no good against a trained opponent, but is it really the case that high level practitioners of karate, kung fu, etc. would fare no better (or even worse) against your average, untrained assailant than anyone else out there? (2) If I were a billionaire willing to pay you a million dollars to develop me a personally tailored “fighting system” with the following criteria, could you do it and if so, what would it look like? - I can only train 1 hr a day, 3x a week - I’m going to be paying five untrained guys to randomly attack me (one at a time) in the street exactly six months from now to test your system. - If I win 4/5 of those fights, you’re getting paid double. Thanks!
Perhaps, but I think a few very important questions here would have to be "Is society always right simply because to be without would be painful?" and "If rejected by society, what would our motivations be?"... "Are we actually doing a good job as a society?"... Something we should all spend some time thinking about.
That's a very interesting point on projection and how we're more afraid of disappointing ourselves than others. Gave me something to think about relating to how I sometimes underperform at my expert job due to some sort of impostor's syndrome or so.. Sometimes (especially on the Internet) I see advice that seems to imply that to not be a "people-pleaser", one would have to be disinterested about how they're making others feel. I don't think that's morally correct at all. At large it seems to be a much bigger problem that people care too little about how they're making others feel than that they care too much. But yeah, if you think that the negative feeling you're causing is not justified, then just need to ignore that. Like, there are people who genuinely feel disgust and feel fear when they see gay people. That obviously doesn't mean that gay people should avoid publicity. Rather it just means that those people, who feel disgust, should not feel it.
Hey there, coach! I'm Eduardo from Brazil and I recently discovered your channel and I just watch it every single day now, it's great stuff! I also recently reviewed a lot of my views in regards to martial arts. That led me to start getting really interested in MMA (which I used to think was just stupid unnecessary violence and now I see I was the stupid one). That said, I still don't like the violent aspects of it. I don't really like seeing blood or wounds on the athletes... The usual stuff that makes a lot of the public watching the fights excited. I just enjoy seeing the techniques, how they are applied and how good the competitors are. I understand that that is a product of combat, but I feel like it's unfortunate that people have to get hurt so bad in combat sports. How do you feel about that? Am I being a hypocrite for liking martial arts and not liking violence? Thanks for everything.
If they ever make a movie about me, I want to be played by Morgan Freeman, and I want there to be a scene where he walks away from a huge explosion in slow motion.
Good day Ramsey! Great show as always. Just have to disagree on the subject about caffeine. What you said was just particularly true. Foods are medicines too. It's not really an addiction for those who does needs it.
Thank you for this topic. I was porn addict and the fight with that was really tough and long because for instance smoking addiction can quit by not buying but you can not sterilize yourself. I want to help other people with that and i would like to say: visit NoFap reddit, they have amazing page with a lot of information and motivation.
Eat chilis, ghost peppers, habaneros... hell, I've tried the OC spray as a spice. As long as: 1.) I don't touch my face (esp mucous membranes) or 2.) inhale via mouth while eating em. Also, wash hands... other than that, it's not even "pain" to me anymore, and hearing ya break it down, I think I may have a Capsaicin addiction? Runner's High w/o running. Guess it's better than some others. Crisis is one of those oddball words that's the same singular and plural, afaik, Coach E: AC turned OC into OF, which was FUBAR, and somewhat WTF, so I went ahead and fixed that ASAP. CYA, and all that.
On the spiritual side of addiction, it's quite a nasty attachment to the material. Material by nature is fleeting and impermanent. Any happiness it begets is in an hourglass that gets smaller and smaller. If you choose to chase after it, you become the snake that eats it's own tail.
I never thought pornography could have a negative effect on me and i never thought i would become addicted to it, but after almost a decade of watching porn on a regular basis i see what it has done and is still doing to me and i wish i could quit it
Trying to stop people-pleasing is not an easy process, but if you really want to make that change in yourself I suggest you start by listening to every episode of The Biggest Problem In The Universe in order. Sounds ridiculous but it works.
'you cannot kill time without injuring eternity'
Dang dude, that's a heck of a line.
Yeah no kidding, that's deep.
Heck of a line....but what does that mean?
I thought the same. While I'm not much of a poetry fan, Thoreau* is one of the few that genuinely clicks with me, as I find his vocabulary and style (generally) inspirational and (universally) witty/clever.
*: Henry David Thoreau is primarily known as a poet of the Transcendentalist subgenre, though he was a man of many talents. I rather admire him, as he seemed to *never* simply take the easy path for it's ease. Pardon the rant. Mild Thoreau Fanboi.
@@paulpolito2001 I like Poetry, but what I hate is when I'm not able to understand because of big fancy words being used (or if not that, then perhaps the word play is way tricky and complex).
In general though, I definitely like Metaphors.
@@tauhid9983 it means that *time is always ticking; whereas if it could be killed, then it would stand still* (imagine everything being frozen in time, because time would no longer be ticking). Therefore, you can't kill time without injuring eternity.
porn addiction is real man and it's an eye opener when you realise it. realised last year and have been trying to quit since
Best of luck mate, it's tough to overcome.
It's Hard but if you get a Grip on Yourself you can Overcome.... It
@@krandom9283 True that.
Dude i was bad into it i would waste hundreds on those cam girls with vibrator toys u pay to activate. You can do it. Just remember theres better things to do with ur time like looks for a real life mate 🤣
Christopher That’s perfectly fine. But obviously a problem if it starts affecting your daily life somehow.
I'm not particularly religious but I realized 5 years ago that pornography and porn addiction is really destructive on a number of levels. This is a serious issue for young men and really important to talk about in this modern era of instant gratification and hedonism and lack of boundaries. Thanks for talking about it Ramsay!
@@iisnipezii4352 Nothing wrong with masturbation but it's best to hold it off at times. Though porn usage is a lot more harmful.
@@iisnipezii4352 started when you were ten and continued for 3 years? Are you only 13? If so you should wait until you hit your 20's then see the true negative effects
Time - it is strange how people are prepared to spend a lot of money and little time to get surgery to 'look good', rather than spend less money and more time to exercise to look AND feel good. Exercise body, mind and spirit...
When I tell the kids at my school that I have never watched pornography, they look at me like I’m crazy, and I feel, like you said, that sexuality has become all too separated from interpersonal relationships and attached to instant personal gratification
Porn use by adolescents is way too normalized
@@JeffreyJefferson that’s who it’s marketed towards
I stopped watching that kind of stuff for a recent fight camp (for the most part I gave in once a week or so) and it really made a difference in the camp. I was just ready to murk my opponent, his corner, the ref, and his mom if she got in the way. I lost, but had the best performance I have ever had to this date, and I partially credit the tenacity while training, and the lessening of fear before the fight to the lack of that kind of thing in my life. I lost the fight because of a freak injury after wiping the canvas with him for the entire fight. Next time I'm not even going to allow myself to give in once per week. It really does help guys.
You know the old trope where the nervous highschool guy gets with the girl, and when it comes to the moment of truth, she looks at him and says, "Is it in?"
The first time I had sex with my girlfriend, the roles were reversed. She was overwhelmed while I was still convinced that I had missed again.
Porn (and the associated behavior) takes away from you a lot, including the ability to enjoy its natural form. No one tells you this stuff, and it strikes us when we're young, vunerable, and have parents who think it's too early to warn us about it, if they're even aware about it at all, themselves.
You just being you is going to offend someone eventually. Learn, be kind, but don't take guff and try to choose your battles wisely. Blind altruism is just as dangerous as selfishness. That's all a good person can do. Some things come easy, some you have to work on. I had to work on choosing my battles wisely. I still am in some ways, but if I'm alive I'm still learning and always getting better. Great vid, cheers from Chicago! 👍🏻
These videos made me understand that you, Mr. Dewey, are not a coach just on the fighting sense; as in you're also a great "life coach" or something, it's a bit hard to express what I mean but I'm sure you get it . Just this sane/sober, wise approach to things and etc I guess. I've learned a lot from you, and I'm sure I'm not alone in this.
Thanks for the consistently great content, I admire you a lot! Much love and respect, all the best to you and yours!
Cheers
Tbh
Being older and hopefully wiser I am not here looking for this advice but at the same time I like the fact that people are asking these questions and I enjoy hearing his advice/answers. Looks like RD is finding another niche.
@@cuzz63 Indeed!
>You cannot kill time without damaging eternity
Wise words!
You always seem to release videos at the time I need them most. I stumbled upon your Aikido video several years ago and realised that I NEEDED to exercise - rather to get strong. I was sick of being weak. Well, I got strong (or at least stronger :P), but apparently only physically. I realised I was addicted to porn about a month ago...the process of quitting is far harder than anything I'd anticipated. Thank you for this video, Ramsey.
The perspective that you offer is incredible. Not trying to bloat your ego, but your wisdom has seriously inspired me several times. I'm trying to be the man, I'm trying to be strong, but I find myself slipping back to the status of monkey time and time again. Something I've learned in life however, is that there is rarely a limit to the amount of times you can try. So that's what I'll do. I'll keep trying until I succeed. Thanks so much for this man, really. I'm not religious in the slightest, but God bless
There's also the fact that everyone in the adult industry is somehow damaged. Substance abuse is common.
Need lots of meth and/or coke to fuck for hours
average lifespan of a porn star is 48 years, 20 years shorter than the average adult male
Spot on about porn, it makes sex like fast-food and bad for us. As Eddy Bravo says look into it. Real talk, mad respect as always coach. I'm an atheist, but I wish more people could speak and represent Christianity (anything else as well) the way you do. You do it with respect and thought. Thank you brother for your insight and respect. I always learn from the Coach. Much love and hope to all from Michigan, stay safe. You're helping me grow with your insights. Peace out
When you give your power to, or become a slave to an "image", the Bible calls that idolatry. Thou shall not make an idol or image.....
Jesus tells his followers to die to self daily. Take up your cross and follow Him. Don't listen to your instinct, "flesh". But rather give up your bodies in the service of Christ.
The apostle Paul repeatedly called himself a slave to Christ.
Thanks Ramsey
As a porn addict, I can confirm this is 100% true
Jacopo Picciuto how do you block pornhub
It's a big commitment however if you avoid eating meat, pepper, garlic, and onion you will be able to transform your sexual energy into energy your body and mind can use for training and life. It will also reduce the urge for sex and porn which may help you. Try it, it's helped me although I've never been addicted, I'm doing it for semen retention and training focus.
Edit: for example before I couldn't go a week without jerking off but now I've completely stopped and am able to completely focus on self improvement. It's been a month so far and I've hardly felt the urge for sex, let alone porn.
@@wildrain8602 What is even the motivation to not masturbate even not once in a week when there are difference beneficies doing it? Really, and it's free and won't kill you if you don't make it psycothic.
@@TheA13000
Yeah, and the average 3 minutes don't cut deep into the training plan...
@@michaelguth4007 its not the time taken masturbating. internet porn fries your brain. there NOTHING your brain enjoys more than jerking off to porn other than actually banging the girls you see. It plays into binge psychology and fries your hippocampus, making it harder and harder to enjoy anything else. look up some ted talks on the neuroscience of it. its quite terrifying. the idea of no fap going from hunter to hunted very quickly against porn.
This is gold mate, my thoughts exactly. Instincts say one thing, mind the other. May I and others fight for taking our free will, strength, power and volition back.
That was tough to listen to. I’ve suffered from porn addiction for years. Still struggling.
Very profound message. I wouldn't be surprised if you RD, have a special calling for the ministry. The truth is out there if one sincerely and wholeheartedly seek it. Thanks!
One of the greatest favors I do to myself is to spend the half hour commute post and pre training listening to these friutful questions and answers, I value your ideas and outlooks on life and it definitely helps me grow day by day, I hope to one day get the chance to send a question to spark that great mind of yours, keep spreading the love, OSS
Dude, I came across you randomly when researching martial arts as I decided to join a school at 35 to try to get in shape in a fun way. So never heard of you before, and damn… I’m on an entirely different journey, you’ve been like a life coach to me in just a few short weeks! Thank you for what you do! Blessings sir! Now, I’m gonna go out… and train…
On the topic of doing things instead of regretting: some desires won't fade over time, and you'll just end up older having lost time you could have spent on doing the thing.
Wow. Ramsey, you touched my heart, thank you. As a man who has struggled with addictions that means a lot.
4:20 "you are not worried about pleasing others, you are worried about pleasing yourself" (through others, using others as puppet)
🙀 mind blown
Right now, Ramsey is not only seen as an MMA coach, but also as someone who shares his knowledge and thoughts in a very logical way. That's good, it opens up the channel for more questions and answers on various subjects.
This just became my favourite TH-cam Channel
Started watching because of the martial arts content, stayed because of "all the other stuff" (psychological/philosophical/religional).
Regarding that "toxic masculinity" stuff, it really makes sense when considering how some of the ancients (like Aristotle) talked about the virtues (courage and all the other personal qualities that make someone a good person).
As Aristotle discusses it, true courage (the virtue) is a "golden means" between two extremes - "too little" courage (cowardice) and "too much" courage (I think the English term is "foolhardiness" - taking unnecessary risks. If there's a burning building, the one with "the proper amount" of courage runs in to save grandma, the one who lacks courage won't run in at all, and the one with "too much" courage runs in just to show off.
There is, of course, a discussion of you can ever have "too much" courage, since courage is a virtue, and so by definition, already the middle ground between two extremes. So we have to use "courage" here in two ways - once for the virtue, and again for what looks like it and shares some characteristics with it, but isn't quite it.
And that (so it seems to me) is the case with "toxic masculinity". If there wasn't a word like "foolhardiness" (or whatever the Ancient Greek equivalent is), Aristotle might well have made up a new term - "toxic courage". Seems to me, it's much the same case with "toxic masculinity" - although yes, some people are really starting to use it now to just mean that being "traditionally masculine" is in itself toxic.
Man Ramsey. You continue to drop valuable gems of wisdom to me that I don’t seem to find anywhere else, at least not as eloquently and plainly as you put them. I actually broke out into tears during this because there were a couple of lines that you said that really carried weight in my own life. You might never realize the kind of help and guidance that you’re giving to people, especially young males (like myself), but from the bottom of my heart I want to tell you thank you for sharing your mind with others. I’m so very grateful for your time. Thank you so much. I hope you and your family are well. God bless you, Coach. 🙏🏼
I wish we had a Ramsey Dewey when drugs are depicted as something entertaining and fun or when the wise ones who spoke truth about their effects where mocked and considered old-fashioned/moralizers.
Thx for ur videos sir btw
Thot patrol enlightenment squad is gaining much power
Ima watch ads for this wise man
Wiser words on the internet are rarely spoken. Thank you Ramsey Dewey for this video.
Good post, Mr. Dewey. There's certainly a lot to contemplate in this life, and fighting is only a fraction of it.
I believe it’s pronounced cry sees
Also good video, I think you’re doing good work here on TH-cam and I thank you for it
I had to quit porn. Its a bad waste of time and mental space and it took me a long time to realize it.
I also had to quit porn.
Didn't get paid enough.
I needed to hear this video badly, all of it. Thank you Ramsay
I'm a people pleaser & I sometimes hate myself for that. I also try to quit porn. Great questions!
There's a cost for every action, more extreme the action, higher the cost. We must always weight the benefits to cost, in most cases our actions can and will affect others for better or worse. I.e. someone wants nothing more than to hurt themselfs or others in one way or another obviously hurt everyone connected,or invested in you. Ramsey saying to do what you want is only good advice if the actions are good. Being a " people person" is simply always putting others before yourselfand thats not a bad thing, the key is to not let people run over you, or take advantage of you good nature.
As for pornography, it should be treated as drugs or gambling, its super easy to do, its very pleasing to do but hard to stop. So moderation it everything. However its effects are subtle at 1st, it changes your expectaions for sex and behavior. It warps your mind, and the more of it you watch the harder it is to reverse, or unsee.
I normally dont comment on youtube, but this video hit close to my heart for i have stuggled for years with porn addiction, and i have been raised to be a "people person".
People person ≠ People pleaser
There is so much that goes into this second topic because of how complex it is. I disagree with certain aspects of your perspective but I definitely agree with you and relate on a lot of it. I believe moderation is the most important form of lifestyle conscious choices because of the negativity that can come out of simple everyday tasks such as eating and relaxing.
I just watched Happy Angry Jesus. You are spot on with your assessment !
you asked if any coffee addicts remember their first cup, well yes I do, I was a freshman in college and since I was a grown up I decided to get a coffee since that's something grown ups do, I had no idea how coffee worked so I ordered espresso because that sounded cool, double shot because more is better. I was shaking throughout several class periods,
I've been struggling lately with an addiction these words really helped me because he wasn't guilt tripping me all
Thank you for this video Ramsey.
Bad behavior is neither masculine or feminine, you get dip-shits on every side of the gender line. But every so often you get someone who really seems to understand that people are good, bad, and indifferent. Thank you for sharing your philosophy.
As always, right on the mark. Continuous discovery is a result of rigorous self discipline because all conflict is ultimately with oneself.
That master knows what he talks about ! U got my sub!
Please, somebody give this man a few million subscribers!
Thank you Ramsey, for your wisdom and kindness
If you like what you see, share it!
One who focuses on external validation will never find internal validation. They will simply be a product of the "crowd"... better hope you are around a phenomenal crowd. You will never lead just follow.
Interesting
False. Many people are built by the crowd, as you imply towards the end; but are exceptional - regardless of its nature. Not everyone can lead, nor should they. To follow, is to trust and as noble as anything else.
I’m honoured coach! 🙏🏻🙏🏻
Ok I’ll train now.. 🙌🏻🏃🏻💪🏻🧘🏻
Your rants are something else ,thanks for that.
Great one, the frog story really hits home.
Keep on the good work.
Cheers from Poland
porn is STRICTLY PROHIBITED. i simply cannot witness a DIFFERENT dude gettin' LAID instead. sorry,charlie.
Woah I’m studying modern dance now, limon, Cunningham, Graham, techniques. I started to study Muay Thai a few months ago bc of the similarities between the movement forms. Your videos further demonstrated the similarities. So cool to know your background!
Awesome message my man even 2 years later
Why did someone ask a mma coach about porn 😂😂
You would be shocked at the variety of questions people ask me.
MMA coaches and martial arts coaches in general can have great life wisdom.
there is BJ and BJJ which are pretty similar stuff
@@funkydown underrated comment
My Randall stack amplifier is surrounded by posters of guitar heroes and I'm very hard on myself for not being where they were at 31.. MMA training has given me healthier perspective on this but your words on desensitization resonate very powerfully on that.
This was a very powerful vid dude, nice work!
Excellent answers to both questions.
The harms of pornography go way beyond negative effects on the lifestyle of men. The demand for pornography fuels rape, sex trafficking, rape of children, exploitation, and the monetization of all of the above. You will never know if the porn you are watching is consensual. You will never know if the people involved both gave their permission. You will never know if that young person is actually a child.
Actually this is not entirely true... countries with access to porn tend to have better sex education and vice versa... look at which countries are the most guilty of sex exploitation, those are usually the most conservative in the world, be it countries in the middle east, or poland, or others.
I definitely see the point that like with everything, there should be limits. Some people can have a pint of beer and enjoy it. Others should not even come close to alcohol, since it will immediately start up addction patterns. I think pornography is similar. There is a huge difference in consuming something once in a while out of curiosity, or beating it eight times a day.
I concede your point, that porn industry is full of shit and recent pornhub purge on unregistered videos shows the scale of the problem. This is the problem. Not the genre itself, but the exploitative industry. Similar to how people say that religion is not the problem, but church is - same logic. If regulations were enforced strongly, you might end up with less shitty industry, spreading sex positivity among consenting adults, which is not a bad thing. Currently, that is far from truth and I agree with you on this point.
@@vitezslavmares5767 you make some good points and I agree with many of them.
There was a meta-analysis study done that looked at the many studies of the effects of porn on people and more than 95% of those studies had to be thrown out because they weren't conducted properly, and among the studies that were left, there wasn't any conclusive evidence that porn was bad for people.
Also, I know this is pedantic, but an important point about addiction is that if someone is addicted and you take away the source, they'll experience either physical withdrawal, emotional withdrawal or both. As an example, if power goes out and the person knows they won't be able to watch porn and they start stressing out because of it, like they need their 'fix' and they know they won't get it, that would fit the description of an addiction. This happens with cigarette smoking but I haven't heard of this when it comes to watching pornography (I could be proven wrong).
As a last note, just because something (usually) doesn't fit the definition of an addiction, doesn't mean it can't have a negative impact in someone's life. You are right that watching pornography takes time, time that could be better spent doing something else. We could say the same thing about watching TV or playing video games (and some do say the same things about TV and video games), my point is only that I don't think it fits the description of an addiction.
In any case, you're one of the few people I know who can have the exact opposite opinion I have while still keeping my attention and having me fully hear you out. I agree with you 99% of the time and I'll always respect your opinion the 1% of the time when I disagree.
Edit: I was halfway through the video and it seems you are very well aware of the 'fix' thing I mentioned. As I mentioned a bit higher up, that would definitely fall in the category of addiction, but as I said, I read a lot of people claiming they are/were addicted to porn but I've never seen confirmation that they actually experienced those feelings. If porn addiction exists, it definitely doesn't affect most people because most people don't describe that. I agree about coffee by the way, my roommate has withdrawal symptoms if she doesn't drink coffee for a single day. She drinks a ton of coffee
This video hits me hard, so many things to ponder about. As always, great video
One of the most compelling speeches on porn. We are so vulnerable, because porn is legal almost in every country in the world. There are no restrctions and you are a few click away from kinky stuff far beyond your imagination. If you fight this new drug, seek professional help or try no fap community. Be strong and never give up.
On the parable of the frog in hot water, I think dropping a frog in boiling water will probably kill it. Definitely cause some damage.
The frog won't jump out if it has its brain removed.
that was the best explanation of pornography ever. You need to copyright that. Great stuff!!!
Thanks for this kind of videos 4:52 it makes me think and be more confident about my projects!
One thing I gotta say, sir Ramsey: Thank you for this video.
As good as you are at martial arts, i feel like this is where you shine. Ur a good dude 💪 not that u need me to tell you that. But you have a gift of gab, as big as your gift for violence 😊
And this will be Sunday's surrim by REV DEWEY
An absolutely magnificent video, coach.
You are a inspiration.... a real man, the real deal!
Very wise words on the addiction Ramsey
"I'm sorry, but I can't make everyone happy, or do I look like a chocolate bar?"
Perhaps
I'm on my first week of celibacy throughout this quarantine. Girlfriend broke up with me at the start of the lockdown, been having mental struggles and moral dilemmas on stopping to beat the meat. But since I've been improving my fitness journey, learning martial arts, I have the motivation to distract myself away from the momentary pleasures I used to do.
Also, a group of primates are also called troops, coach Ramsey.
Beautiful video, excellent job.
I didn't know that you also studied in the university of wisdom...Great speech!
I went to a massage class as a total newbie and it was actually a master teaching teachers. And as long as i acted like a teacher, people where impressed.
So a guy asked me how long i had thought for and i told them that today was my first day as a student. Ever.
Boy the guy got mad.
But the master said
"he is here, let him be here"
I'm glad i told the truth because it was hard to perform at that level.
I have two questions that I’d like answered:
(1) I’ve been thinking a lot lately about various MMA practitioners saying that TMAs “don’t work.” But it really seems like the evidence that is put forward for this is that these TMAs have not been successful in MMA competition. Does that really prove that they don’t work? It may prove that they aren’t the *most effective* styles, or even that they are no good against a trained opponent, but is it really the case that high level practitioners of karate, kung fu, etc. would fare no better (or even worse) against your average, untrained assailant than anyone else out there?
(2) If I were a billionaire willing to pay you a million dollars to develop me a personally tailored “fighting system” with the following criteria, could you do it and if so, what would it look like?
- I can only train 1 hr a day, 3x a week
- I’m going to be paying five untrained guys to randomly attack me (one at a time) in the street exactly six months from now to test your system.
- If I win 4/5 of those fights, you’re getting paid double.
Thanks!
14 days clean from PMO
crisis: plural = crisis
Thanks for the video!
Perhaps, but I think a few very important questions here would have to be "Is society always right simply because to be without would be painful?" and "If rejected by society, what would our motivations be?"... "Are we actually doing a good job as a society?"... Something we should all spend some time thinking about.
Love yourself equal to your love for others, and you will neither abuse, or allow abuse,or neglect the less blessed.
Everytime you refer to your mother she sounds spectacular. Scary. But spectacular.
Thanks for this video I needed this
How well do you think Vitor Belfort will do against Alian Nglani?
Awesome stuff, Ramsey.
We must forsake objectification of our sexuality and humanity. "What do I and this woman truly need", not " what can I get".
That's a very interesting point on projection and how we're more afraid of disappointing ourselves than others. Gave me something to think about relating to how I sometimes underperform at my expert job due to some sort of impostor's syndrome or so..
Sometimes (especially on the Internet) I see advice that seems to imply that to not be a "people-pleaser", one would have to be disinterested about how they're making others feel. I don't think that's morally correct at all. At large it seems to be a much bigger problem that people care too little about how they're making others feel than that they care too much.
But yeah, if you think that the negative feeling you're causing is not justified, then just need to ignore that. Like, there are people who genuinely feel disgust and feel fear when they see gay people. That obviously doesn't mean that gay people should avoid publicity. Rather it just means that those people, who feel disgust, should not feel it.
Hey there, coach! I'm Eduardo from Brazil and I recently discovered your channel and I just watch it every single day now, it's great stuff! I also recently reviewed a lot of my views in regards to martial arts. That led me to start getting really interested in MMA (which I used to think was just stupid unnecessary violence and now I see I was the stupid one). That said, I still don't like the violent aspects of it. I don't really like seeing blood or wounds on the athletes... The usual stuff that makes a lot of the public watching the fights excited. I just enjoy seeing the techniques, how they are applied and how good the competitors are. I understand that that is a product of combat, but I feel like it's unfortunate that people have to get hurt so bad in combat sports. How do you feel about that? Am I being a hypocrite for liking martial arts and not liking violence? Thanks for everything.
Ramsey was a Dancer, a Preacher and a Cage Fighter. Someone needs to make a movie on this man
If they ever make a movie about me, I want to be played by Morgan Freeman, and I want there to be a scene where he walks away from a huge explosion in slow motion.
@@RamseyDewey explosion scene would be your and Master Wongs beef
I recently became the frog again after 1-2 months. Thank you Ramsey. This video helps.
thank for this video i am an addict to masturbation but this helps me try my best to stop masturbation thank you Ramsey
Good day Ramsey! Great show as always. Just have to disagree on the subject about caffeine. What you said was just particularly true. Foods are medicines too. It's not really an addiction for those who does needs it.
Thank you for this topic. I was porn addict and the fight with that was really tough and long because for instance smoking addiction can quit by not buying but you can not sterilize yourself.
I want to help other people with that and i would like to say: visit NoFap reddit, they have amazing page with a lot of information and motivation.
The make and model of Ramsey’s mother: British, Classic.
Like an old British Leyland Marina
Agree with you 100% & as far as Pizza goes, my 2 favorites are, Supreme & then Hawaiian.
I like my pizza without cheese
Eat chilis, ghost peppers, habaneros... hell, I've tried the OC spray as a spice. As long as: 1.) I don't touch my face (esp mucous membranes) or 2.) inhale via mouth while eating em. Also, wash hands... other than that, it's not even "pain" to me anymore, and hearing ya break it down, I think I may have a Capsaicin addiction? Runner's High w/o running. Guess it's better than some others.
Crisis is one of those oddball words that's the same singular and plural, afaik, Coach
E: AC turned OC into OF, which was FUBAR, and somewhat WTF, so I went ahead and fixed that ASAP. CYA, and all that.
your tastebuds might have been burnt off bud.
This video is enlightening.
Brilliant video.
On the spiritual side of addiction, it's quite a nasty attachment to the material. Material by nature is fleeting and impermanent. Any happiness it begets is in an hourglass that gets smaller and smaller. If you choose to chase after it, you become the snake that eats it's own tail.
I never thought pornography could have a negative effect on me and i never thought i would become addicted to it, but after almost a decade of watching porn on a regular basis i see what it has done and is still doing to me and i wish i could quit it
Trying to stop people-pleasing is not an easy process, but if you really want to make that change in yourself I suggest you start by listening to every episode of The Biggest Problem In The Universe in order. Sounds ridiculous but it works.