Or… let’s not be cowards and just be truthful, honest, moral people and TELL our wives instead of making her live a lie? Yes, you are not “lying” to her face but you are being deceitful. Deceitful means hiding something and being deceitful is not liked in Islam. This could lead to more lies when she asks where u have been, who you were with etc. and guess what?! LYING IS HARAM! So you will end up doing it because this leads to EVIL. Islam encourages honesty, so why not do that? Islam encourages staying away from things that can lead to evil, so why not choose that?! You all wanna do the better thing so badly when it comes to sunnah, like getting more wives but when it comes to being moral and choosing the more liked option in Islam, of being honest with your partner, you run away from this? 😂 such pathetic behaviour. Man up and tell her. Don’t ruin anymore women’s lives with your cowardly oppressive behaviour. Taking advantage of the weak and being unjust. Islam has so much logic, so think logically and see this option has way too many cons, leads to way too many SINS. Just stop, you are all agreeing with this because it is comfy for you to do so. Selfish behaviour. NOT because you wanna “save her from heartache” don’t give me that rubbish. You and I know clearly that she will be more heartbroken when she finds out you have been hiding it!
Honestly, it is better to inform the first wife before going for second and preferably make her a bit comfortable about this idea. The initial part of going through second marriage shall be tiring with your first wife, but if you explain well, take care of her feelings, value her, make her feel comfortable, she will stand supporting you in this sunnah! in sha Allah
I am Mufti Abdurrahman Abdulawal, and I have been educated in various authentic Islamic institution, including memorizing the Quran from Masjid Nabawi in the prophet’s city of Medina, graduating with honors after being among the top ten memorizers of the Holy Quran. Since then, I have become an Islamic scholar, and studied hadith and jurisprudence under renowned scholars, and right now, I am a teacher at Darul Quran WasSunnah and a member of the Sharia Board of New York. And I am also married, so I feel it is incumbent upon me to enlighten some people about the proper way to discuss marital relations. I wanted to highlight one important point. Islam teaches that we were created to worship and obey Allah and His Messenger. Our Prophet Muhammad (Peace be upon him) lived by this principle, and even though he could have become very wealthy by doing a lot of business, he chose to remain in poverty until his death. Believers were not sent to this world for enjoying luxuries. Indulgence in any sort of excessive pleasures is counterproductive for human beings. Due to our own indulgence, and following the practice of the non-Muslims and getting obsessed with sexual activities, there are thousands of Saudi Arabian youths, Kuwait youngsters, Qatari men and women, elderly entrepreneurs from Oman and Bahrain, and even scientists from Indonesia and Malaysia, Africa and India, are now being most severely tortured in CIA’s Bush-era interrogation programs, that are until today, operating in secrecy in many European countries. People are leaving Islam in hordes because they are disgusted by our obsession with sex. Did you ever see a Christian priest or a Jewish rabbi uploads such shameless video about sexual actions? Who do you think Allah will allow into paradise? Muslims are being warned by Allah to be sensible. It infuriates me to see Muslims use sharia and Islam to fulfill their own carnal desires, and becoming obsesses with politics, lust and relations, especially in a holy month like Ramadhan. For several years, I have been teaching Islamic Jurisprudence in Islamic establishments in NY, including in Darul Quran WasSunnah. DO not delude ourselves by using hadeeth and Quran to convince yourself that you are doing sunnah. Marriage is allowed only for procreation, and the Prophet (peace be upon him) never indulged in sexual activities (there are clear hadeeth that neither he saw his wife’s body, nor did they ever see between his navel and knees). If you must use religion, and Islam, then try to follow the Sunna of the prophet and stay awake at night for prayers and fast all day. DO not delude yourself into becoming sick like animals because if Allah loves you, you will be punished in this world. Like those thousands of Muslims who were framed for crimes and are now being tortured in black site prisons because they would be very active in relation with their halal wives. They also used hadeeth and Quran to make them believe they are doing sunnah. Marriage is allowed only for procreation, not for sick behavior like the Mushrikeens. Allama Ismail of Saharanpur once said obsession with physical and sexual relationships destroys the human soul. Even if it is legal inside marriage, this is a luxury and any luxury people indulge in too much they suffer severely for it. Even if someone eats too much sugar, they get diabetes. If someone eats too much fat, they get heart disease. If someone had too much physical relationships, even if it is legal and allowed in deen and an act of worship but still it takes peoples heart away from Allah. If someone is like the sahabas and has Imaan as strong as the prophets who spent their days fighting in Allah’s path shedding blood and dying and spent their nights in long prayers crying uncontrollably for the ummah, only then the physical relationship with their spouse won’t bring them any harm because their heart wouldn’t be distracted from Allah. However in my sheik’s personal experience, he had seen dozens of people who were too indulgent with their wife sexually which is completely allowed in deen but he had seen them go through the bitterest pain and suffering
hiding a second wife should never be an option if men intend to marry once again, then their first wife should be someone who is fine with second marriages.
@@dreqmy exactly, it is not that hard to tell the woman you are marrying in advance that you have intentions to get a second wife. It’s very selfish on the husbands part as a person, to not tell the wife this and ruin a woman’s life because this will lead to divorce. They only care about themselves. Marriage is a two person thing, it’s like these people only think marriage is for the man? Both people are married to each other so why not treat the wife like a human and also acknowledge she has a life, emotions, feelings. This has lead to women taking their lives too. How sad to hide it from her. It’s not hard to be a moral, honest good person.
Not really. A Muslim man doesnt need permission to marry from his parents or his wife. Its pretty clear both from Quran and hadith. so please stop giving fatwas without knowledge.
@@mari20400 Once again please dont say things out of thin air. the creator of the heavens and the earth, ALLAH SWT gave that right to men. As the sheikh said its not recommended to hide but its not a sin as well if youre not lying. Because its permitted for him.
@@badolgiringya5035 it’s allowed in the Hadith for women to put this in her nikkah, that she is allowed to divorce if he does get a second wife, this sheikh literally has videos explaining this and if you want proof: report narrated by al-Bukhaari (2721) and Muslim (1418), that the Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “The conditions that are most deserving to be fulfilled are those by means of which intimacy becomes permissible for you.” And because he (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “The Muslims are bound by their conditions, except a condition that makes something permissible forbidden or makes something forbidden permissible.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhi (1352) and Abu Dawood (3594). It was classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Tirmidhi. I suggest you educate yourself on this knowledge that this exact sheikh said was halal in another video, before you start accusing people of spreading false info. NOWHERE in the Quran and Hadith does it say that men are allowed to be deceitful and then do this which leads to more lies and thus MORE haram. Deceitful means to hide something, “hiding the truth” - there is also a a Hadith saying the one who deceives is not one of us. It’s common sense not to do something like this, as it leads to lies trying to hide it. Allah has explained in many versus of the Quran how you should treat your spouse fairly. Nowhere in the Quran or Hadith does it condone deceit in marriage. Islam commands fairness and honesty, and hiding a second marriage is unjust. Even if it’s not explicitly haram, it’s against the spirit of fairness and could lead to harm. Be mindful of your actions, as Allah knows your intentions and guides us to be truthful and just in all dealings. It doesn’t say anywhere in the Quran that this is haram, but you should use your logic and not do things that could lead to more evil.
@@badolgiringya5035 again, I suggest you watch this sheikhs video that proves you wrong once again. And explains how a woman can put in her nikkah condition that she has the right to divorce him if he gets a second wife, she is also recommended to know about the wife if she writes this too, even if she doesn’t write it Allah has literally encouraged us to be honest and truthful in the Quran. This sheikh also recommended not to hide this, as it can lead to more harm than good. What if your wife takes her life if she finds out you hid this? What then? This is called oppressing and taking advantage of the weak. There is NO HADITH NO QURANIC VERSE that says this is halal. This is a loop hole you have created just because it doesn’t specifically say it’s haram. It doesn’t specifically say many things are haram yet we use our common sense and logic to outweigh the good and bad in something. We use our common sense to know if it’s haram! Therefore, it’s common sense to know that hiding something so big will lead to more sin and lies. There are literal hadiths to prove you wrong that I have sent before this comment. Please read those and stop accusing me of spreading things. If the Quran and Hadith says it’s permissible to hide the truth (be deceitful) about this, then please provide those Hadiths and Quranic versus. Because I have not seen any verse except versus of being JUST and truthful and MORAL. If not then have a nice day and you are wrong.
Where did you get this recommendation? So youre saying our beloved Rasul SAW, many prophets AS and all the sahabas RA went against the recommendation? please gather knowledge before you write.
@ Read Quran properly its been said that marriyng one wife is better. And the concept of multiple woman came when during the war multiple womans loose their husband and everything they were totally helpless. Hazrat Muhammad SW married a widow to built a concept that a wpman can get married again after the death of their husbands. But the question is are you going to marry woman to give them a proper respect and dignity or you want to marry them to fulfill your disire?
So it’s best to be deceitful (hide things and not be honest to the person you love) instead of being honest with her? Then when she finds out this way she will hate you and this could lead to worse things like divorce or her hurting herself out of heart break. Relationships should be honest and respectful. This is so upsetting. No problem in getting a second wife, but Allah would never want you to deceive someone. TELL YOUR WIFE do not be sneaky and untrustworthy person. To all the sisters reading this, please put in your nikkah contract that he has to tell you if he wants a second wife and you are allowed to divorce him for this. Just look at men encouraging this deceiving behaviour. It’s so scary to marry a Muslim man after seeing such behaviour online. People are allowed to have their preferences for marriage. It’s so obvious a man would never be able to see his wife with another man, if this was allowed in Islam. Therefore, a woman can also be heartbroken and choose to not want this in her Nikkah contract. And this is why it is SUNNAH NOT FARDH BECAUSE ALLAH KNOWS WE ARE HUMAN TOO. You do realise we are humans with feelings and emotions too? You can say women who do not want this are taking “marital rights away”, you take our HUMAN rights away by making us live a LIE by NOT TELLING US YOU HAVE MORE WIVES. This is not moral or normal. There are men who are fine with one wife, so let this woman marry a man like that and do not force or shame her to accept something that hurts her! Especially if you men would NEVER be able to accept your wife to have another husband. And if you want more wives, then marry a woman who is fine with that! It’s not that hard for goodness sake.
This is not deceiving or lying. go to counselor looks like you're suffering from accepting what is halal. it is haraam for a woman to have more than one husband so every man would be upset if his wife commits adultery. and do not speak without knowledge. this will lead you to hell. keep your opinions to yourself. your opinions do not matter when it comes to Islam. only Qu'ran and sunnah does.
@@wZaidhan Allah has already said not to be sneaky, not to deceive people. To be a good person. I think you should take a deep breath, as you seem to be very defensive, misunderstood everything I said and are trying to form your own kind of Islam. I also said the example of “more than one husband will upset any man” to show that men would also be sad IF THIS WAS HALAL. It’s called a “hypothetical statement”. I am not saying It is allowed in Islam. I am saying to stop being so insensitive about women not wanting this, as if it was the other way round, men are human and would also be saddened by this. I never said it’s not halal to have a second wife, please do not waste my time accusing me of rubbish that I did not say and read what I wrote properly. If you are a good, righteous, respectful and a moral person, then you will be honest with your wife and not deceive her. You will let her know because it’s her marriage too. And that is a fact. And sheikh has also said in the video that he does not suggest you to not tell her. So why are you jumping to take advantage of your wife and choosing the bad option? Just cos you found a loop hole on how to hide something from someone? How sad. There are no loop holes in Islam. It’s common sense that this is deceitful. Do not spread your bad opinion. Maybe go with the more healthy option that will not get you divorced if she finds out the wrong way. No where in Islam, Hadith or Quran does it say you can deceive your wife, this is just a new thing men have added to find some loop hole of having control when it’s common sense that this is a very wrong, dishonest thing to do to a “loved one”.
@@wZaidhan please read my comment again before accusing me of things I did not say. And accusing me of making halal haram. You have misunderstood my whole comment. I never said it’s haram to have a second wife, nor did I say it’s not adultry to have a second husband. All I said was it’s morally correct to tell her. I used the “second husband will hurt a man” example as a HYPOTHETICAL statement. So let’s say, IF it was halal to have a second husband and not adultry, a lot of men would also not be able to handle this and feel sadness. As they are HUMAN. Therefore, please do not be a hypocrite and be insensitive towards the women who are saddened by second wives. It’s sunnah not fardh, so a woman can have an opinion of what she wants in HER life and HER marriage too. Secondly, no where in Islam does it say that being deceitful towards someone (hiding something from them) is halal. This is a loop hole that has been created and there are no loop holes in Islam. God said lying is haram, God obviously agrees that being honest with your spouse is the best option. Sheikh also said in the video that hiding this was not the good option, so why are you choosing the bad option that could lead to divorce if she finds out you were deceiving her the whole time? making her think she was the only one while you were with another? Allah knows everyone’s intentions, if this affects your wife and you make her hurt, which leads to her being ill, you will get sin. Best to be honest with a person instead of intentionally hiding it and hurting them. If you are a righteous, moral, honest person you would be honest with your spouse about something so huge. Remember it’s also HER marriage not just yours you are changing. Be a good person. Be a good Muslim. May Allah guide us all.
@@wZaidhan also this is a comment section so no, I won’t “keep my opinions to myself” maybe learn how to read my comment properly before telling me I’m going to lead myself to hell lol. This is also haram. The way you reply to people is disgusting. If it bothers you so much then do not interact and scroll, you misunderstood the whole comment anyways, I doubt you even read the whole thing judging by your comment that accused me of things I didn’t do. That’s the proof there.
@@wZaidhan wrong, I think you need a counsellor as you seem to be suffering with believing made up stuff. If you do not tell her the truth about your second wife, this could lead to lies in trying to hide it or where u have been etc. lies= more and more haram. Allah says the hypocrites lie and the hypocrites are in the most hated category. The only logical option would be to be honest from the start, in order to prevent haram by lying. Wife can also file for divorce if she does not want a second wife. Maybe you should see what is halal and haram before accusing others. She can write in her Nikkah that husband has to tell her and she can divorce which is completely fair. If you disagree then I guess you just don’t respect your wife as a person.
Stupid idiotic advice! Not even thinking once how this affects the children of the first wife. What nonsense are you encouraging here? Preserving a family is what you should teach. He married multiple times and that’s why he is encouraging others to do so too. I would love to know what his wives and children think of him. What trauma are his children going through? Obviously he is too busy flexing on TH-cam to know better.
@@hrherii8184 exactly. The least the man can do is tell his wife, but so many men are taking advantage of the weak and finding loop holes. There are no loop holes in Islam! This is why you should be careful who you follow and get advice from. Just follow the Quran and Hadith. No where in Quran does it say that you can hide things like this, this will lead to more lies and that is more SINS! I am appalled by this statement. This is deceitful. If the wife finds out, she will realise she has been deceived and probably divorce or be heartbroken and could possible take her life. This can cause a lot of drama and pain, why don’t they just man up and tell their wife what they r gonna do. This is why women should write in their nikkah a condition where he has to tell her and if he does get a second wife, she can divorce him for that. If he signs this on Nikkah then it is fardh on him. This is what Islam says. I didn’t think I’d have to do this but the fact that so many men are taking advantage of us now, it’s scary to marry.
Please stop this nonsense advice immediately!!! Stop teaching people garbage!!! God says if man is gonna be equal in feelings with all his wives and treat them all the same way then marry up to 4 wife, but if not then marry only one wife!!! No man and no person can love 2, 3, or 4 people expectly the same way so that means one wife only!!!
Audubillah where did you get this fatwa sister? So youre saying our beloved Rasul SAW and almost all the sahabas RA didnt love their wives "the same way"? And also please dont change words of ALLAH SWT. Its a major sin and it can take you out of fold of Islam. You might dislike the idea of a co wife and its permissible. But please please dont change the words of Quran.
@@badolgiringya5035 why are you putting words into people’s mouths? Where did she utter Muhammad pbuh name? You are nothing like the prophet pbuh, he was special. And it is very rare to love 4 wives equally. It is literally human nature. However, this doesn’t make it not allowed to have 4 wives as that is probably your test as a man only Allah knows best. It is encouraged that if you feel like you will not be fair, such as loving them equally, then you should not get another wife. I’m sure this is what this sister was stating.
@ Ofc Rasul SAW is the best creation of ALLAH SWT and sahabas RA are way better than us or we will ever be. But how does that contradict what I said? Can we give the same excuse for not having beard, wearing hijab, praying fard salah? No. Because its the ruling and we must follow it. ALLAH SWT never said we must love all wives equally because HE created us and knows its not possible. Equality has no place in Islam it should be equity. So for example if one of my wives is unwell she deserves more of my attention and love than others. Same goes for others. If one needs emergency money that doesnt mean I have to provide the same amount to all of them. I know youre pretty emotional about this topic but its not about our whims or desires rather what ALLAH SWT and Rasul SAW instructed us.
@@badolgiringya5035 Ya Allah, I am so shocked, where on earth did you get this information from?!! There are so many Hadiths and scholars that disagree with you oh my God. I am actually so shocked. I am not emotional but just so shocked by the ignorance! Brother with all due respect, please just research about this it’s common knowledge that you HAVE to treat them equally. It’s LITERALLY in the Quran: In Sūrat al-Nisāʾ, Allāh says: “… Marry the women who please you, two, three, or four. But if you fear that you will not be just, then marry only one….” In the verse, Allāh permits a Muslim man to marry more than one woman, but also adds the condition that the husband must be just and treat all his wives fairly. It’s human nature to not be able to love them equally Allah knows this, however if you cannot afford financially to provide EQUALLY for each one then you cannot afford more wives simple. Even this scholar in the video disagrees with you. I literally said “oh my God” out loud because I have never met a Muslim with this kind of mentality. Please do not spread such false information. That is so haram.
Everything is fine with what the Sheikh said, except he saying so easily to divorce the first wife with whom he has four children, if she’s not ok with the second marriage 😮🤯
@@taimurahmad proof of any of this in the video being true? Where is your proof? Where is your proof that you are allowed to hide things and lie to your wife when she asks if you have another wife? Where is your proof that wife cannot divorce because of this?
It is better to hide her from the first in order to have peace and keep your first marriage if he really needs to have a second wife (instead of doing haram he marries and do halal nikah)…. Allah gave the husband the right and permission to marry up to four women so the females should not be asking him not to remarry… I am a woman 👩🏾 and I am all for polygyny and I want my husband to marry again if he wants to.
That is your decision. I am a woman and I would like to not be deceived my whole life. Ok, you marry a man who agrees with having more wives, that is your choice, women who agree with this should marry men who want this and let women who are upset by this (as they are humans, with human feelings and any man would feel hurt too if they saw their wife with a man). This is why it’s sunnah and not fardh. Allah knows humans have emotions and Islam does not encourage deceiving and making a woman live a lie her whole life. The least the man can do is TELL his wife instead of deceiving her. This is taking advantage of the weaker. That is so sad. This is not the Islam I know where you are encouraged to have two faces to your wife and pretend she is the only one. Imagine what she would feel if she found out that way. It’s not that hard to let women marry men who prefer to stick with one wife. No need to shame women who prefer that, as it’s human nature.
@@nialeilakande Well that’s nice for you then, but do not force other women to want this or be ok with it in their life as it’s sunnah not fardh. Do not compare, everyone is different. Men who want more wives should marry women like you, who don’t mind. And men who prefer one wife, or can only afford one, should marry women who prefer this. If he wants a second wife, it’s human decency to tell his wife. It’s morally correct, and makes you an honest good person if you tell your spouse the TRUTH. If not, then that is just being deceitful and insulting. Sheikh has also said in the video that it’s better to tell her, as not being honest will lead to dispute. And it can lead to divorce or heartbreak. I’m happy for you sister, you don’t mind this. However, I don’t see common sense in thinking “why are women so upset by this? it’s Islam! they should accept it and be quiet” No. women are humans and can choose to not want this as it’s not fardh. Hypothetically, if it was halal for a woman to have more husbands, majority of men would not be able to handle that. It’s a very hypocritical mentality to look down on women who prefer no second wife. It’s human nature to not want this, some people see marriage as something sacred between two people and that is fine. Remember, it is OUR marriage too, not just his. It is HALAL for us to write in our nikkah that if he wants a second wife then we can divorce. It’s called personal preference. It doesn’t matter if you are a woman and agree, many women are hurt by this and that’s fine because it’s human nature to not want this. If you don’t mind, then allahuma barik well done, may Allah bless you. But deceiving her, not telling her…. That is just out of order.
Hiding it can lead to lies, lying is haram. It’s best to do what sheikh said to do and avoid the “hiding ur wife” option. This leads to many bad outcomes and can lead to more haram by lying.
Or… let’s not be cowards and just be truthful, honest, moral people and TELL our wives instead of making her live a lie? Yes, you are not “lying” to her face but you are being deceitful. Deceitful means hiding something and being deceitful is not liked in Islam. This could lead to more lies when she asks where u have been, who you were with etc. and guess what?! LYING IS HARAM! So you will end up doing it because this leads to EVIL. Islam encourages honesty, so why not do that? Islam encourages staying away from things that can lead to evil, so why not choose that?! You all wanna do the better thing so badly when it comes to sunnah, like getting more wives but when it comes to being moral and choosing the more liked option in Islam, of being honest with your partner, you run away from this? 😂 such pathetic behaviour. Man up and tell her. Don’t ruin anymore women’s lives with your cowardly oppressive behaviour. Taking advantage of the weak and being unjust. Islam has so much logic, so think logically and see this option has way too many cons, leads to way too many SINS. Just stop, you are all agreeing with this because it is comfy for you to do so. Selfish behaviour. NOT because you wanna “save her from heartache” don’t give me that rubbish. You and I know clearly that she will be more heartbroken when she finds out you have been hiding it!
Honestly, it is better to inform the first wife before going for second and preferably make her a bit comfortable about this idea. The initial part of going through second marriage shall be tiring with your first wife, but if you explain well, take care of her feelings, value her, make her feel comfortable, she will stand supporting you in this sunnah! in sha Allah
I am Mufti Abdurrahman Abdulawal, and I have been educated in various authentic Islamic institution, including memorizing the Quran from Masjid Nabawi in the prophet’s city of Medina, graduating with honors after being among the top ten memorizers of the Holy Quran. Since then, I have become an Islamic scholar, and studied hadith and jurisprudence under renowned scholars, and right now, I am a teacher at Darul Quran WasSunnah and a member of the Sharia Board of New York.
And I am also married, so I feel it is incumbent upon me to enlighten some people about the proper way to discuss marital relations. I wanted to highlight one important point. Islam teaches that we were created to worship and obey Allah and His Messenger. Our Prophet Muhammad (Peace be upon him) lived by this principle, and even though he could have become very wealthy by doing a lot of business, he chose to remain in poverty until his death. Believers were not sent to this world for enjoying luxuries. Indulgence in any sort of excessive pleasures is counterproductive for human beings.
Due to our own indulgence, and following the practice of the non-Muslims and getting obsessed with sexual activities, there are thousands of Saudi Arabian youths, Kuwait youngsters, Qatari men and women, elderly entrepreneurs from Oman and Bahrain, and even scientists from Indonesia and Malaysia, Africa and India, are now being most severely tortured in CIA’s Bush-era interrogation programs, that are until today, operating in secrecy in many European countries. People are leaving Islam in hordes because they are disgusted by our obsession with sex. Did you ever see a Christian priest or a Jewish rabbi uploads such shameless video about sexual actions? Who do you think Allah will allow into paradise? Muslims are being warned by Allah to be sensible. It infuriates me to see Muslims use sharia and Islam to fulfill their own carnal desires, and becoming obsesses with politics, lust and relations, especially in a holy month like Ramadhan. For several years, I have been teaching Islamic Jurisprudence in Islamic establishments in NY, including in Darul Quran WasSunnah. DO not delude ourselves by using hadeeth and Quran to convince yourself that you are doing sunnah. Marriage is allowed only for procreation, and the Prophet (peace be upon him) never indulged in sexual activities (there are clear hadeeth that neither he saw his wife’s body, nor did they ever see between his navel and knees). If you must use religion, and Islam, then try to follow the Sunna of the prophet and stay awake at night for prayers and fast all day. DO not delude yourself into becoming sick like animals because if Allah loves you, you will be punished in this world. Like those thousands of Muslims who were framed for crimes and are now being tortured in black site prisons because they would be very active in relation with their halal wives. They also used hadeeth and Quran to make them believe they are doing sunnah. Marriage is allowed only for procreation, not for sick behavior like the Mushrikeens. Allama Ismail of Saharanpur once said obsession with physical and sexual relationships destroys the human soul. Even if it is legal inside marriage, this is a luxury and any luxury people indulge in too much they suffer severely for it. Even if someone eats too much sugar, they get diabetes. If someone eats too much fat, they get heart disease. If someone had too much physical relationships, even if it is legal and allowed in deen and an act of worship but still it takes peoples heart away from Allah. If someone is like the sahabas and has Imaan as strong as the prophets who spent their days fighting in Allah’s path shedding blood and dying and spent their nights in long prayers crying uncontrollably for the ummah, only then the physical relationship with their spouse won’t bring them any harm because their heart wouldn’t be distracted from Allah. However in my sheik’s personal experience, he had seen dozens of people who were too indulgent with their wife sexually which is completely allowed in deen but he had seen them go through the bitterest pain and suffering
hiding a second wife should never be an option
if men intend to marry once again, then their first wife should be someone who is fine with second marriages.
@@dreqmy exactly, it is not that hard to tell the woman you are marrying in advance that you have intentions to get a second wife. It’s very selfish on the husbands part as a person, to not tell the wife this and ruin a woman’s life because this will lead to divorce. They only care about themselves. Marriage is a two person thing, it’s like these people only think marriage is for the man? Both people are married to each other so why not treat the wife like a human and also acknowledge she has a life, emotions, feelings. This has lead to women taking their lives too. How sad to hide it from her. It’s not hard to be a moral, honest good person.
Not really. A Muslim man doesnt need permission to marry from his parents or his wife. Its pretty clear both from Quran and hadith. so please stop giving fatwas without knowledge.
@@mari20400 Once again please dont say things out of thin air. the creator of the heavens and the earth, ALLAH SWT gave that right to men. As the sheikh said its not recommended to hide but its not a sin as well if youre not lying. Because its permitted for him.
@@badolgiringya5035 it’s allowed in the Hadith for women to put this in her nikkah, that she is allowed to divorce if he does get a second wife, this sheikh literally has videos explaining this and if you want proof: report narrated by al-Bukhaari (2721) and Muslim (1418), that the Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “The conditions that are most deserving to be fulfilled are those by means of which intimacy becomes permissible for you.”
And because he (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “The Muslims are bound by their conditions, except a condition that makes something permissible forbidden or makes something forbidden permissible.”
Narrated by al-Tirmidhi (1352) and Abu Dawood (3594). It was classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Tirmidhi.
I suggest you educate yourself on this knowledge that this exact sheikh said was halal in another video, before you start accusing people of spreading false info. NOWHERE in the Quran and Hadith does it say that men are allowed to be deceitful and then do this which leads to more lies and thus MORE haram. Deceitful means to hide something, “hiding the truth” - there is also a a Hadith saying the one who deceives is not one of us. It’s common sense not to do something like this, as it leads to lies trying to hide it. Allah has explained in many versus of the Quran how you should treat your spouse fairly. Nowhere in the Quran or Hadith does it condone deceit in marriage. Islam commands fairness and honesty, and hiding a second marriage is unjust. Even if it’s not explicitly haram, it’s against the spirit of fairness and could lead to harm. Be mindful of your actions, as Allah knows your intentions and guides us to be truthful and just in all dealings. It doesn’t say anywhere in the Quran that this is haram, but you should use your logic and not do things that could lead to more evil.
@@badolgiringya5035 again, I suggest you watch this sheikhs video that proves you wrong once again. And explains how a woman can put in her nikkah condition that she has the right to divorce him if he gets a second wife, she is also recommended to know about the wife if she writes this too, even if she doesn’t write it Allah has literally encouraged us to be honest and truthful in the Quran. This sheikh also recommended not to hide this, as it can lead to more harm than good. What if your wife takes her life if she finds out you hid this? What then? This is called oppressing and taking advantage of the weak. There is NO HADITH NO QURANIC VERSE that says this is halal. This is a loop hole you have created just because it doesn’t specifically say it’s haram. It doesn’t specifically say many things are haram yet we use our common sense and logic to outweigh the good and bad in something. We use our common sense to know if it’s haram! Therefore, it’s common sense to know that hiding something so big will lead to more sin and lies. There are literal hadiths to prove you wrong that I have sent before this comment. Please read those and stop accusing me of spreading things. If the Quran and Hadith says it’s permissible to hide the truth (be deceitful) about this, then please provide those Hadiths and Quranic versus. Because I have not seen any verse except versus of being JUST and truthful and MORAL. If not then have a nice day and you are wrong.
Islam recommends ONE WIFE. I have no idea why people have trouble understanding this.
Bcz they just wanna marry maximume wifes and in this patriarchal society its easy to prove any idology.
Proof hadith rejector?
Where did you get this recommendation? So youre saying our beloved Rasul SAW, many prophets AS and all the sahabas RA went against the recommendation? please gather knowledge before you write.
@ Read Quran properly its been said that marriyng one wife is better. And the concept of multiple woman came when during the war multiple womans loose their husband and everything they were totally helpless. Hazrat Muhammad SW married a widow to built a concept that a wpman can get married again after the death of their husbands. But the question is are you going to marry woman to give them a proper respect and dignity or you want to marry them to fulfill your disire?
But having more it's not Haram .
So it’s best to be deceitful (hide things and not be honest to the person you love) instead of being honest with her? Then when she finds out this way she will hate you and this could lead to worse things like divorce or her hurting herself out of heart break. Relationships should be honest and respectful. This is so upsetting. No problem in getting a second wife, but Allah would never want you to deceive someone. TELL YOUR WIFE do not be sneaky and untrustworthy person. To all the sisters reading this, please put in your nikkah contract that he has to tell you if he wants a second wife and you are allowed to divorce him for this. Just look at men encouraging this deceiving behaviour. It’s so scary to marry a Muslim man after seeing such behaviour online.
People are allowed to have their preferences for marriage. It’s so obvious a man would never be able to see his wife with another man, if this was allowed in Islam. Therefore, a woman can also be heartbroken and choose to not want this in her Nikkah contract. And this is why it is SUNNAH NOT FARDH BECAUSE ALLAH KNOWS WE ARE HUMAN TOO. You do realise we are humans with feelings and emotions too? You can say women who do not want this are taking “marital rights away”, you take our HUMAN rights away by making us live a LIE by NOT TELLING US YOU HAVE MORE WIVES. This is not moral or normal.
There are men who are fine with one wife, so let this woman marry a man like that and do not force or shame her to accept something that hurts her! Especially if you men would NEVER be able to accept your wife to have another husband. And if you want more wives, then marry a woman who is fine with that! It’s not that hard for goodness sake.
This is not deceiving or lying. go to counselor looks like you're suffering from accepting what is halal. it is haraam for a woman to have more than one husband so every man would be upset if his wife commits adultery. and do not speak without knowledge. this will lead you to hell. keep your opinions to yourself. your opinions do not matter when it comes to Islam. only Qu'ran and sunnah does.
@@wZaidhan Allah has already said not to be sneaky, not to deceive people. To be a good person. I think you should take a deep breath, as you seem to be very defensive, misunderstood everything I said and are trying to form your own kind of Islam. I also said the example of “more than one husband will upset any man” to show that men would also be sad IF THIS WAS HALAL. It’s called a “hypothetical statement”. I am not saying It is allowed in Islam. I am saying to stop being so insensitive about women not wanting this, as if it was the other way round, men are human and would also be saddened by this. I never said it’s not halal to have a second wife, please do not waste my time accusing me of rubbish that I did not say and read what I wrote properly.
If you are a good, righteous, respectful and a moral person, then you will be honest with your wife and not deceive her. You will let her know because it’s her marriage too. And that is a fact. And sheikh has also said in the video that he does not suggest you to not tell her. So why are you jumping to take advantage of your wife and choosing the bad option? Just cos you found a loop hole on how to hide something from someone? How sad. There are no loop holes in Islam. It’s common sense that this is deceitful. Do not spread your bad opinion. Maybe go with the more healthy option that will not get you divorced if she finds out the wrong way. No where in Islam, Hadith or Quran does it say you can deceive your wife, this is just a new thing men have added to find some loop hole of having control when it’s common sense that this is a very wrong, dishonest thing to do to a “loved one”.
@@wZaidhan please read my comment again before accusing me of things I did not say. And accusing me of making halal haram. You have misunderstood my whole comment. I never said it’s haram to have a second wife, nor did I say it’s not adultry to have a second husband.
All I said was it’s morally correct to tell her. I used the “second husband will hurt a man” example as a HYPOTHETICAL statement. So let’s say, IF it was halal to have a second husband and not adultry, a lot of men would also not be able to handle this and feel sadness. As they are HUMAN. Therefore, please do not be a hypocrite and be insensitive towards the women who are saddened by second wives. It’s sunnah not fardh, so a woman can have an opinion of what she wants in HER life and HER marriage too.
Secondly, no where in Islam does it say that being deceitful towards someone (hiding something from them) is halal. This is a loop hole that has been created and there are no loop holes in Islam. God said lying is haram, God obviously agrees that being honest with your spouse is the best option. Sheikh also said in the video that hiding this was not the good option, so why are you choosing the bad option that could lead to divorce if she finds out you were deceiving her the whole time? making her think she was the only one while you were with another? Allah knows everyone’s intentions, if this affects your wife and you make her hurt, which leads to her being ill, you will get sin. Best to be honest with a person instead of intentionally hiding it and hurting them. If you are a righteous, moral, honest person you would be honest with your spouse about something so huge. Remember it’s also HER marriage not just yours you are changing. Be a good person. Be a good Muslim. May Allah guide us all.
@@wZaidhan also this is a comment section so no, I won’t “keep my opinions to myself” maybe learn how to read my comment properly before telling me I’m going to lead myself to hell lol. This is also haram. The way you reply to people is disgusting. If it bothers you so much then do not interact and scroll, you misunderstood the whole comment anyways, I doubt you even read the whole thing judging by your comment that accused me of things I didn’t do. That’s the proof there.
@@wZaidhan wrong, I think you need a counsellor as you seem to be suffering with believing made up stuff. If you do not tell her the truth about your second wife, this could lead to lies in trying to hide it or where u have been etc. lies= more and more haram. Allah says the hypocrites lie and the hypocrites are in the most hated category. The only logical option would be to be honest from the start, in order to prevent haram by lying. Wife can also file for divorce if she does not want a second wife. Maybe you should see what is halal and haram before accusing others. She can write in her Nikkah that husband has to tell her and she can divorce which is completely fair. If you disagree then I guess you just don’t respect your wife as a person.
Stupid idiotic advice! Not even thinking once how this affects the children of the first wife. What nonsense are you encouraging here? Preserving a family is what you should teach. He married multiple times and that’s why he is encouraging others to do so too. I would love to know what his wives and children think of him. What trauma are his children going through? Obviously he is too busy flexing on TH-cam to know better.
@@hrherii8184 exactly. The least the man can do is tell his wife, but so many men are taking advantage of the weak and finding loop holes. There are no loop holes in Islam! This is why you should be careful who you follow and get advice from. Just follow the Quran and Hadith. No where in Quran does it say that you can hide things like this, this will lead to more lies and that is more SINS! I am appalled by this statement.
This is deceitful. If the wife finds out, she will realise she has been deceived and probably divorce or be heartbroken and could possible take her life. This can cause a lot of drama and pain, why don’t they just man up and tell their wife what they r gonna do. This is why women should write in their nikkah a condition where he has to tell her and if he does get a second wife, she can divorce him for that. If he signs this on Nikkah then it is fardh on him. This is what Islam says. I didn’t think I’d have to do this but the fact that so many men are taking advantage of us now, it’s scary to marry.
Correct advice according to the quran and sunnah..Alhamdulillah!
@@taimurahmad and which Quran verse and Hadith is that? None 😂 you have no proof whatsoever. Delusional.
Please stop this nonsense advice immediately!!! Stop teaching people garbage!!! God says if man is gonna be equal in feelings with all his wives and treat them all the same way then marry up to 4 wife, but if not then marry only one wife!!! No man and no person can love 2, 3, or 4 people expectly the same way so that means one wife only!!!
Proof from islaam of your nonsense?
Audubillah where did you get this fatwa sister? So youre saying our beloved Rasul SAW and almost all the sahabas RA didnt love their wives "the same way"? And also please dont change words of ALLAH SWT. Its a major sin and it can take you out of fold of Islam. You might dislike the idea of a co wife and its permissible. But please please dont change the words of Quran.
@@badolgiringya5035 why are you putting words into people’s mouths? Where did she utter Muhammad pbuh name? You are nothing like the prophet pbuh, he was special. And it is very rare to love 4 wives equally. It is literally human nature. However, this doesn’t make it not allowed to have 4 wives as that is probably your test as a man only Allah knows best. It is encouraged that if you feel like you will not be fair, such as loving them equally, then you should not get another wife. I’m sure this is what this sister was stating.
@ Ofc Rasul SAW is the best creation of ALLAH SWT and sahabas RA are way better than us or we will ever be. But how does that contradict what I said? Can we give the same excuse for not having beard, wearing hijab, praying fard salah? No. Because its the ruling and we must follow it. ALLAH SWT never said we must love all wives equally because HE created us and knows its not possible. Equality has no place in Islam it should be equity. So for example if one of my wives is unwell she deserves more of my attention and love than others. Same goes for others. If one needs emergency money that doesnt mean I have to provide the same amount to all of them. I know youre pretty emotional about this topic but its not about our whims or desires rather what ALLAH SWT and Rasul SAW instructed us.
@@badolgiringya5035 Ya Allah, I am so shocked, where on earth did you get this information from?!! There are so many Hadiths and scholars that disagree with you oh my God. I am actually so shocked. I am not emotional but just so shocked by the ignorance! Brother with all due respect, please just research about this it’s common knowledge that you HAVE to treat them equally. It’s LITERALLY in the Quran: In Sūrat al-Nisāʾ, Allāh says: “… Marry the women who please you, two, three, or four. But if you fear that you will not be just, then marry only one….” In the verse, Allāh permits a Muslim man to marry more than one woman, but also adds the condition that the husband must be just and treat all his wives fairly. It’s human nature to not be able to love them equally Allah knows this, however if you cannot afford financially to provide EQUALLY for each one then you cannot afford more wives simple. Even this scholar in the video disagrees with you. I literally said “oh my God” out loud because I have never met a Muslim with this kind of mentality. Please do not spread such false information. That is so haram.
So what options a woman have eho find other man attractive and have strong desires for them and the husband is not fulfilling them ??
Everything is fine with what the Sheikh said, except he saying so easily to divorce the first wife with whom he has four children, if she’s not ok with the second marriage 😮🤯
Nothing is fine with what he said lol.
@@userfriendlyforever Proof from quran and sunnah?
@@taimurahmad proof of any of this in the video being true? Where is your proof? Where is your proof that you are allowed to hide things and lie to your wife when she asks if you have another wife? Where is your proof that wife cannot divorce because of this?
Great statement big lessons for all of us amen
It is better to hide her from the first in order to have peace and keep your first marriage if he really needs to have a second wife (instead of doing haram he marries and do halal nikah)…. Allah gave the husband the right and permission to marry up to four women so the females should not be asking him not to remarry… I am a woman 👩🏾 and I am all for polygyny and I want my husband to marry again if he wants to.
That is your decision. I am a woman and I would like to not be deceived my whole life. Ok, you marry a man who agrees with having more wives, that is your choice, women who agree with this should marry men who want this and let women who are upset by this (as they are humans, with human feelings and any man would feel hurt too if they saw their wife with a man). This is why it’s sunnah and not fardh. Allah knows humans have emotions and Islam does not encourage deceiving and making a woman live a lie her whole life. The least the man can do is TELL his wife instead of deceiving her. This is taking advantage of the weaker. That is so sad. This is not the Islam I know where you are encouraged to have two faces to your wife and pretend she is the only one. Imagine what she would feel if she found out that way. It’s not that hard to let women marry men who prefer to stick with one wife. No need to shame women who prefer that, as it’s human nature.
@@nialeilakande Well that’s nice for you then, but do not force other women to want this or be ok with it in their life as it’s sunnah not fardh. Do not compare, everyone is different. Men who want more wives should marry women like you, who don’t mind. And men who prefer one wife, or can only afford one, should marry women who prefer this. If he wants a second wife, it’s human decency to tell his wife. It’s morally correct, and makes you an honest good person if you tell your spouse the TRUTH. If not, then that is just being deceitful and insulting. Sheikh has also said in the video that it’s better to tell her, as not being honest will lead to dispute. And it can lead to divorce or heartbreak.
I’m happy for you sister, you don’t mind this. However, I don’t see common sense in thinking “why are women so upset by this? it’s Islam! they should accept it and be quiet” No. women are humans and can choose to not want this as it’s not fardh. Hypothetically, if it was halal for a woman to have more husbands, majority of men would not be able to handle that. It’s a very hypocritical mentality to look down on women who prefer no second wife. It’s human nature to not want this, some people see marriage as something sacred between two people and that is fine.
Remember, it is OUR marriage too, not just his. It is HALAL for us to write in our nikkah that if he wants a second wife then we can divorce. It’s called personal preference. It doesn’t matter if you are a woman and agree, many women are hurt by this and that’s fine because it’s human nature to not want this. If you don’t mind, then allahuma barik well done, may Allah bless you. But deceiving her, not telling her…. That is just out of order.
Hiding it can lead to lies, lying is haram. It’s best to do what sheikh said to do and avoid the “hiding ur wife” option. This leads to many bad outcomes and can lead to more haram by lying.
Then you are no real woman if you want your husband to cheat on you.
@@mari20400 well said