I used to be really happy. My grandma died and everything is going downhill. Can't tell if i want to live or not. I want to for my family and friend but life is my choice.
@@heyumimhere6024 damn your right. But its also like a game, there are obstacles in life and you have to get over them to complete the game (die peacefully). If you fail the monster (depression) will end you. Game over.
I remember him so vaguely. My memory is wiped of all the good times, I only remember the last few moments before he was gone from this world forever. I'd never seen him again, never hear his voice, never see his smile, and make him laugh. Never sing songs with him anymore. Never having any of that ever again, knowing it's my fault. Dec 25, 2005 - May 24, 2019. Rest in peace, my love, my tressure, my happiness, my light, my world, my joy, my reason, my life. Aaron.
I'm sorry for your loss, and I want to tell you that no matter how much you believe that it was your fault, no matter the circumstances that led to his passing, you are not at fault, and I am more than sure that he would have wanted you to be happy for the moments you spend with him, rather than blaming yourself while thinking of those memories. He would have wanted you to forgive yourself for whatever happened, because its no ones fault. Im sorry if this comment was offensive in any way
I know that..no one will say anything or let alone like it...this song makes me remember that it’s ok to suffer..I suffer for everyone else’s happiness because being numb isn’t what gets me up out of bed for school it’s the thought of being able to make other people feel what I can’t..~Oliver
EN: After her death... I felt so empty inside.. Like a hole in your chest... Thanks. RUSS: После её смерти... Мне стало так пусто на душе.. Будто дыра в груди... Спасибо.
This song makes me genuinely cry. It makes me remember when I used to hate myself so much. When I used to think about hurting myself. And it brings back memories of a friend who stabbed me in the back. And I miss her.
All of my emotions are happening. I feel tired. I wish I could reach out to friends but idk if they'd care. it's sad to think that so many people are suffering with depression. Teenagers especially. I watch this song on repeat because it gives me a sense that maybe someone will come for me.
This song calms me down a lot, it does not sound upsetting if you listen to it from the other side. I like to listen to this after panic attacks that happen when I wake up and I had a nightmare or in my dream I got really shocked a lot and ye, when I wake up I cannot breath I need to manually try to breath. This helps me to get rid of the panic attack feeling. Thanks for the Daycore version of this.
I don't know how to describe it. I miss her, I want to see her, hear her and hug her so tightly, but alas, I cannot do this, I still remember that last moment when I saw her :( I just cannot describe this feeling! When you lost a person who treated you so well. ... ... ... ... ... I miss 😖
I actually lost someone a few months ago and I was listening to this once I heard he passed. I still haven't gone over him and I listen to this audio when I think about him or when I vent about him and I just wish I could see him again. This audio helps a lot when I do hope to see him when it's my turn.
We all can agree that our smiles fade away when were alone. I just smile when someones there so no one will think that im not okay, I mean i dont want to make them worried..
Hmm...a lot people want to die....do u notice how strong those words really are? u can't just say that there nobody who loves u or say " nobody loves me" but do u really know if anybody loves u? U just say " i wanna die " without thinking how people around would feel to see u die? The world is not just about u dieing the world is not black or white it gray ,because good and bad things happend. Losing sombody u love is very painful but it just another step in life, ik i would never understand how u feel but u can't just say "i just want to die already " . Pls think before u speak because u don't just hurt urself u also hurt ur surroundings... i hope u all can feel better soon have a nice day.
This song.. when I listen to it, I think about what could have been. What life would be like if things had gone just a little differently. What if dad never met that woman? What if mom never found out? What if dad hadn't abandoned us? What if he had been humane enough to let us keep our childhood? I don't think I'll ever forgive him. Oh, how much pain that man has caused. I wonder, if things had been just a little different, if I could look at a father and his child and not think about how I wish that could have been me. Moral of the story: Don't abandon your children. It will break them and shatter any kind of trust they have in both you and love in general. And especially don't try to force yourself in their life years later, only to leave them again all while manipulating them into loving you. I'm sorry, that got a bit too personal. It's just hard. Also a discovery I made today: apparently I get poetic during depressive episodes. Who knew.
Why are people on the internet so nice? Why'd I have to be stuck with these idiots in my school who can't understand the difference between being scared and having anxiety? And being sad, verses having depression. everyone in this comment section is sharing the personal shit in their lives, and then the people in their replies are offering support, and sharing their similar experiences. Why can't real life be like the internet?
There's always that time in your life where you just feel... empty. Like nothing you do seems to really matter; like you're stuck in a loop, every day repeating over and over. And it slowly drains you, eating away at you, eventually leaving nothing. Just a shell of who you were, stuck in this loop of waking up, going to work or to school, coming home and going to bed. It seems endless, but like all storms, it doesn't last forever and when the end comes, the sunlight will fill you once more. The loop will end, and you will be free one day. And when it comes, you'll be stronger than before.
Happiness at some moments does or doesn't exist happiness is not real we just think it is to make us feel better happiness is just a state of your mind that make u stop thinking all about bad things it just doesn't allow you actually be alone with your self not with you mask but actually with you self you soul
this song makes me think that nobody will ever be there for me and a reason why i dont trust anyone not even my loved ones bc im scared they would leave me and leave me out to die and fade away from all of life the one thing will be left is stupidity and regret.. and all the saddest things come to me and end up happening whats even the point we just loop our life over and over again it maybe different one time but still its the same because your still here with people just people..
i'm just gonna vent. you don't have to read this trash if you don't want to. basically i guess i've had a hard life. i grew up with my grandparents, ig i'll make a timeline age 1 month old. my mother managed to take me away from my grandparents, and get custody of me. my mom and dad were both on drugs, i had to endure the screaming and yelling and fighting, and sometimes the fighting was physical. i can't remember it but i still have a fear of loud noises. age 6. i had my baby sister. eva. eva... she was adorable. blonde hair, blue eyes... her and i had different dads. but we were still siblings. and- i didn't know- the last time i would ever see her was on the car drive to foster care.. my mom and her dad fought, and argued a lot... i was at my moms house once and my uncle was there, one of my uncles is a paranoid schizophrenic. and- he basically tried to tell me to hide a knife in my sleeve, being the child i was, i hid it in my sleeve. my mom was being pinned down to the bed in the other room and her boyfriend was pinning her down and screaming at her. my uncle came into their room and stabbed her boyfriend in the back, all i remember is him going to the hospital. turns out i guess he had bipolar or something... age 8. i made my first friend, i wont say her name, but i'll call her jade. she was- a very very manipulative kid. she was 9, while i was 8, and basically i thought since she was older, i should listen to her. i got my first pet at this age aswell. a ferret. i adored the ferret! i named her lily... ... jade... she uh... she got jealous. she got really jealous because i couldn't spend time with her. she actually asked to spend the night with me, and my grandmother said sure. she took the ferret out of the cage while i was in the bathroom, and i was told at that age she threw it from my top bunk ( i had a bunkbed because we thought we'd get my baby sister ) and it hit its head. turns out she had bashed the ferrets head in on the footboard of the bed... i didn't keep that bed... age 10. i went to my first mental hospital for cutting. at the time i was in a stage of life where i was realizing everything. everything that had gone on in my life, as a young child, you didn't fucking know how bad it was when your mom told you she would stop doing drugs but go to jail for drug abuse.. you didn't know how bad it was when your little sister was taken by foster care... she was in my life at the time and she'd yell- and scream- she'd insult my grandmother and she'd even get angry at me for crying. i- ended up taking a steak knife into my room and cutting myself with it. i couldn't cut too deep because- ofc it was a steak knife. age 11. i've gone to two mental hospitals for the past year. one for suicidal tendencies and the other for overdosing on my medication. i actually got a girlfriend... and- she ended up breaking up with me. i love her. i love her so much- as soon as i got out of the hospital. i read my notifications. she- actually had- broken up with me. i broke down and my mom came into my room asking me what was wrong, i lied to her, she didn't know. i felt broken. like a piece of me was just missing. i loved light so much. i loved her with all my heart. and i realized. hiding your heart by giving it to someone else isn't the best way to go. i should of just taken the damn clonidine instead of the zoloft. i regret not taking it. i have a couple razors in my room that i use to cut- but uh. yeah. thats my stupid story.
Love is a very small chance of happening for the world and heart of gold that will be crushed and burned within seconds beyond time that goes by in a minute and it will be soon ashes and dust and never can be fixed. Open your eyes, your heart, your mind and kiss it goodbye and soon a new one will be there but only in black gray and white and you will never feel the golden heart again. No matter how hard we all try it can never be fixed. We still try it till this day. The last words of it was "I'm sorry but this can never be fixed I am burning and dieing within seconds, please do not leave me like this, please." and the rest was static and pressure and you will never feel love again like you used to.
может всё и вправду, всё что я делаю бесполезно? хочется поговорить с одним человеком по душам, не просто через интернет, а в реальной жизни... но я начинаю на себя накручивать и думать, что зря я это всё делаю, я ему безразлична, я такая жалкая, стараюсь привлечь внимание... страшно. страшно подойти. страшно быть отвергнутой. страшно быть обманутой. страшно думать, что все мои действия были бесполезными. кажется я люблю этого человека, но не могу принять эти чувства. хочется одновременно послать его и одновременно тянуться к нему. как. как перестать бегать за людьми. как перестать бегать за людьми, которым на тебя всё равно. как перестать чувствовать тревогу. как преодолеть свой страх. как..... этот человек...он... может в глубине души он на самом деле ненавидет меня? за мои тупые действия, слова... мне стыдно. из-за этого я теряю надежду узнать этого человека поближе, заговорить с ним в реальном мире, а не просто активно поболтать в интернете и на тысячу лет замолчать... я не знаю что делать.
this song makes me remember everything that has happened to me my "best friend" screaming at me her forcing me into a relationship even though im not lesbian her making me take the blame on everything her lies my cat drowning my parents secretly giving away our dogs my parents screaming and fighting my father almost killing himself right infront of me and my mom him yelling at me my teacher yelling at me for not knowing something my "best friend" acting like im mean to her and not treating her right im trying i do everything she says it hurts i cant escape nobody knows i have feelings too im trying to be nice but they wont listen they all want their way i let them have it i cant fight back the feeling.. hurts it hurts so bad.. i dont understand how can others be so happy? they all say put their feelings first im doing that but they're being selfish im only here because of my family my mother doesnt feel well if she gets covid and dies i wont be able to take it anymore but what about dad what about our pets we cant let them starve we cant let them be thirsty to death theres nothing happy anymore its like, the younger we are the more attention we get in kindergarten we got to take naps they expected us to get good sleep now? they expect us to study all night and if we do? we'll be tired sleep is more important than school school is stupid i dont care if we learn things there its still stupid life is hell its all useless why cant life be fair my grandparents are christian, they say god will help us i dont believe in god i try to get attention so someone will help so someone will notice my pain but they never notice and they never care maybe they do see my pain but they're too selfish to care they only know that im not them most likely if i kill myself some will care but the selfish ones only care when you're dead right now, they dont give a fuck if my family starts to die off i wont care anymore life will just be pain and suffering might as well kill myself if they die off i'll tell my grandma to give my pets new homes when i die i dont give a fuck if anyone tries to make me feel better or say "look at the bright side" there is no fucking bright side maybe i am depressed but if i told someone they'd be like "bruh you're so dramatic, you arent dEpReSsEd" and thats true doubt is stronger than belief sadness is stronger than happiness and thats a fucking fact i want to tell someone but feelings hurt they hurt so bad i honestly hate life im only fucking 10 hopefully in 6th grade i can change schools so i dont have to be with my "best friend" she thinks shes everything she thinks that shes the fucking boss of the whole school well she fucking isnt i wish i never met her
@Mimi на счёт помочь Я не уверенна.... Знаешь, у меня раньше тоже было переломное время, но мне всегда помогала музыка и книги.. Может попробуешь что то из этого ( не заставляю, просто советую)
Oh.. I see so much upset and depressed people in comennts. There is no fake smiles or emotions. These are real. Thats the real life. And thats kinda sad.
Life is just one big fucked up reality we have to live through. We always end up dieing in the end tho, so why waste ur time on something like suicide? Idk maybe because you only live through life to go through pain and suffering.
![CAMPปลิ้น | EP.82[2/2] เมาท์มอยกับ 3 สาวเพื่อนซี้ ที่พร้อมขยี้พ่อหมีได้ทุกเมื่อ](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/Wwn7WnylNtQ/mqdefault.jpg)
![Ｏｃｔｏｂｅｒ Ｗｅｅｋｅｎｄ (Daycore/Anti-Nightcore/Slowed down) + sea [October Weekend meme]](/img/n.gif)
the original version makes me upset
this version makes me cry ;;
Same
Kira Yoshikage? Xd
But same
@@azullapeyre7745 yeah 😳😳
Same
*_remembering how happy I used to be, and now I’m so messed up that happiness is something that comes and goes in a matter of minutes._*
I used to be really happy. My grandma died and everything is going downhill. Can't tell if i want to live or not. I want to for my family and friend but life is my choice.
I fell the same but I don’t want to tell my experiences online I’m not ready yet
Life is a never ending pit of sadness, and pain..
@@heyumimhere6024 damn your right. But its also like a game, there are obstacles in life and you have to get over them to complete the game (die peacefully). If you fail the monster (depression) will end you. Game over.
this hits so hard
I feel like this is what it would sound like looking bad at old memories and pictures/videos of someone who you were in love with who’s gone now.
It is :,(
F e e l i n g T h a t
I feel that too...
@@reeneesdaycore5487 You're not alone..
If need help can talk with me in Hangoust , Amino or Discord..
I was just thinking of that cuz this reminds me of my best friend/crush.
I always hear this when I'm having an anxiety attack to calm down
sammeee
I just want to die already
edit: this was from my cringe fake depressed phase don't worry too much 💀
@@kaysome85 omg , can we talk a moment please ?
@@kaysome85 please answer meeeeeh 😭😭😭
Heya, I just came to listen to this because of panic attack.
I remember him so vaguely. My memory is wiped of all the good times, I only remember the last few moments before he was gone from this world forever. I'd never seen him again, never hear his voice, never see his smile, and make him laugh. Never sing songs with him anymore. Never having any of that ever again, knowing it's my fault.
Dec 25, 2005 - May 24, 2019.
Rest in peace, my love, my tressure, my happiness, my light, my world, my joy, my reason, my life. Aaron.
im so sorry.
I'm sorry for your loss, and I want to tell you that no matter how much you believe that it was your fault, no matter the circumstances that led to his passing, you are not at fault, and I am more than sure that he would have wanted you to be happy for the moments you spend with him, rather than blaming yourself while thinking of those memories. He would have wanted you to forgive yourself for whatever happened, because its no ones fault.
Im sorry if this comment was offensive in any way
1:11
This part makes me remember shit idk why
Same
Is this the only comment that isn’t depressing fr
@@kz7xyz
Well kinda??
This part of the song makes me remember dark shit that happend so eh-
I know that..no one will say anything or let alone like it...this song makes me remember that it’s ok to suffer..I suffer for everyone else’s happiness because being numb isn’t what gets me up out of bed for school it’s the thought of being able to make other people feel what I can’t..~Oliver
@Alekoralia please don't say that you're a mistake because i love !
Недооцененный комментарий
@Kikutaru hey,i hope u are ok. Just,try to see the beautiful side of life.
I can't smile neither, but im telling jokes to my friends to see and make them smile
@RogueBabyBee This comment is old as hell. But, even though you have literally no idea who I am:
Wanna chat? I mean, if you're still lonely.
ｃａｎ ｉ ｊｕｓｔ ｆｏｒｇｅｔ ｙｏｕ？
EN:
After her death... I felt so empty inside.. Like a hole in your chest... Thanks.
RUSS:
После её смерти... Мне стало так пусто на душе.. Будто дыра в груди... Спасибо.
R E Y а что за аниму?
Хочу немного погрустить.
У меня тоже было такое чувство...
@@Takira_J Sorry, but, this kind of joke is kinda rude in my opinion.
извини, конечно, за вопрос, но после чьей смерти? (я просто не в теме, сорри)
@@Takira_J repeat after me:
Posle eyo smerti... Ya chustvoval pustotu vnutri.. Kak bud-to dira v moey grudi.. Spasibo
@@Takira_J i feel it
I'm now realizing that everyone leaves me in the end.... I'll miss you Tara...
Don't worry , i'm here if you want someone to talk to 💫💖😘
your comment makes me cry
This song makes me genuinely cry. It makes me remember when I used to hate myself so much. When I used to think about hurting myself. And it brings back memories of a friend who stabbed me in the back. And I miss her.
It's been seven months. I'm guessing the answer is yes, but do you still miss her?
_If those who didn't see the description._
*_Original by Alx Beats_*
Eodumxvc no it’s not??-
Eodumxvc it’s not, he took a sample..
+++
All of my emotions are happening. I feel tired. I wish I could reach out to friends but idk if they'd care. it's sad to think that so many people are suffering with depression. Teenagers especially. I watch this song on repeat because it gives me a sense that maybe someone will come for me.
I wish someone cared about me
@@kaysome85 I really care about you
I care about all of you.
Хорошо, но откуда мне знать, что вы не похожи на тысячи других пользователей Gacha, которые все время лгут о депрессии?
Everyone here is so nice...
im listening to this when im sad. it makes me calm! Also tysm for doing this in daycore! D;
This song calms me down a lot, it does not sound upsetting if you listen to it from the other side. I like to listen to this after panic attacks that happen when I wake up and I had a nightmare or in my dream I got really shocked a lot and ye, when I wake up I cannot breath I need to manually try to breath. This helps me to get rid of the panic attack feeling. Thanks for the Daycore version of this.
Damn
I miss him so much
I miss my fucking old life
Im afraid of everything
But it’s nothing, it will pass over time, as I am always told lmao :)
I don't know how to describe it. I miss her, I want to see her, hear her and hug her so tightly, but alas, I cannot do this, I still remember that last moment when I saw her :( I just cannot describe this feeling! When you lost a person who treated you so well. ... ... ... ... ... I miss 😖
I relate :((
lmao
I realy like the song. I am feeling so sad right now :,)
I actually lost someone a few months ago and I was listening to this once I heard he passed. I still haven't gone over him and I listen to this audio when I think about him or when I vent about him and I just wish I could see him again. This audio helps a lot when I do hope to see him when it's my turn.
Aww, i hope you'll be fine right now. Thats sad and i felt that pain.
I'M NOT CRYING YOU'RE CRYING
Вспомнила случай, истерика .. рыдаю просто ..
(23:22 - время)
Какой случай? Я наверное могла бы помочь...
Под нее сижу и плачу..
3 часа ночи
We all can agree that our smiles fade away when were alone.
I just smile when someones there so no one will think that im not okay,
I mean i dont want to make them worried..
Под этот шедевр,я вспоминаю своё ужасное прошлое. Спасибо...
+
+
а я вспоминаю хорошее прошлое на фоне дерьмового настоящего, но, как говорится, everything would be fine.
1:40
I always hear someone screaming or yelling that they're sorry, i'm not sure why😭
That sucks and depressing
this song makes a bunch of negative memories flood back, and for some reason i dont want to forget them.
This song make me cry but she's beautiful
You sound like Russian
@@pandaawkolepto3589 i'm french
@@aikahonenuki7011 pareil ! Je m'attendais pas a voir des fr içi !
@@乇卂尺卄丂卂尺 on est cachés 👁
*i took a deep breath at the beginning of this video*
Oh god, I remember this so well, so many memories especially sad ones :( I think I left a comment here but I can’t find it sadly..
today I feel very bad. It feels like nothing inside me
if i was better, everything would be fine
1:40 makes me think of someone screaming and yelling I’m sorry while being beaten up and killed by an ex of some sort. Like an ex partner or friend
I don't understand why I listen to this song, if I get depressed, or maybe I like to get depressed-
Depression isn't a thing you just get and goes away in a few days
I think you're talking about sadness
@@Es-mv2mk I'm sorry, I meant sadness
I needed this 🖤
you "fine"
me "fine"
we "fine"
*L U C I F E R*
This music remember me, the happy moments before the world pandemic
My english is very Bad
I'm Brazilian, I'm training my english
0.75.
your welcome.
*you're
It literally just sounds like shit
Wtf?....
Ammm thanks(?
I don't know XD
?.
Hmm...a lot people want to die....do u notice how strong those words really are? u can't just say that there nobody who loves u or say " nobody loves me" but do u really know if anybody loves u? U just say " i wanna die " without thinking how people around would feel to see u die? The world is not just about u dieing the world is not black or white it gray ,because good and bad things happend. Losing sombody u love is very painful but it just another step in life, ik i would never understand how u feel but u can't just say "i just want to die already " . Pls think before u speak because u don't just hurt urself u also hurt ur surroundings... i hope u all can feel better soon have a nice day.
This song.. when I listen to it, I think about what could have been. What life would be like if things had gone just a little differently.
What if dad never met that woman?
What if mom never found out?
What if dad hadn't abandoned us?
What if he had been humane enough to let us keep our childhood?
I don't think I'll ever forgive him. Oh, how much pain that man has caused. I wonder, if things had been just a little different, if I could look at a father and his child and not think about how I wish that could have been me.
Moral of the story: Don't abandon your children. It will break them and shatter any kind of trust they have in both you and love in general. And especially don't try to force yourself in their life years later, only to leave them again all while manipulating them into loving you.
I'm sorry, that got a bit too personal. It's just hard. Also a discovery I made today: apparently I get poetic during depressive episodes. Who knew.
Why are people on the internet so nice? Why'd I have to be stuck with these idiots in my school who can't understand the difference between being scared and having anxiety? And being sad, verses having depression.
everyone in this comment section is sharing the personal shit in their lives, and then the people in their replies are offering support, and sharing their similar experiences.
Why can't real life be like the internet?
There's always that time in your life where you just feel... empty. Like nothing you do seems to really matter; like you're stuck in a loop, every day repeating over and over. And it slowly drains you, eating away at you, eventually leaving nothing. Just a shell of who you were, stuck in this loop of waking up, going to work or to school, coming home and going to bed. It seems endless, but like all storms, it doesn't last forever and when the end comes, the sunlight will fill you once more. The loop will end, and you will be free one day. And when it comes, you'll be stronger than before.
This is so calming but also depressing at the same time
Three minutes, fly by so fast.... In this wonderful music...
this hits hard :(
I love this song so much, it makes me calm
I should have been
ｂｅａｕｔｉｆｕｌ
this kind of makes me remember that the world will probs end before im atleast 50 lmao
Making all your anxiety and fears into a joke be like.
This song makes me think if memories...
memories I don’t have...
I’m just got over cry by this song
So calming =~=
man the sound its great the vid everything
can believe it
Happiness at some moments does or doesn't exist happiness is not real we just think it is to make us feel better happiness is just a state of your mind that make u stop thinking all about bad things it just doesn't allow you actually be alone with your self not with you mask but actually with you self you soul
Боже это лучшее что я слушала
hi im here after chapter 266 of bnha and i haven't stopped listening to this since
this song makes me think that nobody will ever be there for me and a reason why i dont trust anyone not even my loved ones bc im scared they would leave me and leave me out to die and fade away from all of life the one thing will be left is stupidity and regret.. and all the saddest things come to me and end up happening whats even the point we just loop our life over and over again it maybe different one time but still its the same because your still here with people just people..
Прекрассно,можно задуматься о жизни
Вспоминать хорошие моменты общения с друзьями
И просто расслабиться
Согласна :_)
you ever just think of what your life could've been..?
i'm just gonna vent. you don't have to read this trash if you don't want to.
basically i guess i've had a hard life. i grew up with my grandparents, ig i'll make a timeline
age 1 month old. my mother managed to take me away from my grandparents, and get custody of me.
my mom and dad were both on drugs, i had to endure the screaming and yelling and fighting, and sometimes the fighting was physical. i can't remember it but i still have a fear of loud noises.
age 6. i had my baby sister. eva. eva... she was adorable. blonde hair, blue eyes...
her and i had different dads. but we were still siblings. and- i didn't know- the last time i would ever see her was on the car drive to foster care..
my mom and her dad fought, and argued a lot...
i was at my moms house once and my uncle was there, one of my uncles is a paranoid schizophrenic. and- he basically tried to tell me to hide a knife in my sleeve, being the child i was, i hid it in my sleeve. my mom was being pinned down to the bed in the other room and her boyfriend was pinning her down and screaming at her. my uncle came into their room and stabbed her boyfriend in the back, all i remember is him going to the hospital. turns out i guess he had bipolar or something...
age 8. i made my first friend, i wont say her name, but i'll call her jade.
she was- a very very manipulative kid. she was 9, while i was 8, and basically i thought since she was older, i should listen to her.
i got my first pet at this age aswell. a ferret. i adored the ferret! i named her lily...
...
jade... she uh... she got jealous. she got really jealous because i couldn't spend time with her.
she actually asked to spend the night with me, and my grandmother said sure.
she took the ferret out of the cage while i was in the bathroom, and i was told at that age she threw it from my top bunk ( i had a bunkbed because we thought we'd get my baby sister ) and it hit its head. turns out she had bashed the ferrets head in on the footboard of the bed...
i didn't keep that bed...
age 10. i went to my first mental hospital for cutting. at the time i was in a stage of life where i was realizing everything. everything that had gone on in my life, as a young child, you didn't fucking know how bad it was when your mom told you she would stop doing drugs but go to jail for drug abuse.. you didn't know how bad it was when your little sister was taken by foster care...
she was in my life at the time and she'd yell- and scream- she'd insult my grandmother and she'd even get angry at me for crying. i- ended up taking a steak knife into my room and cutting myself with it. i couldn't cut too deep because- ofc it was a steak knife.
age 11. i've gone to two mental hospitals for the past year. one for suicidal tendencies and the other for overdosing on my medication. i actually got a girlfriend... and- she ended up breaking up with me. i love her. i love her so much- as soon as i got out of the hospital. i read my notifications. she- actually had- broken up with me. i broke down and my mom came into my room asking me what was wrong, i lied to her, she didn't know. i felt broken. like a piece of me was just missing. i loved light so much. i loved her with all my heart. and i realized. hiding your heart by giving it to someone else isn't the best way to go. i should of just taken the damn clonidine instead of the zoloft. i regret not taking it.
i have a couple razors in my room that i use to cut-
but uh. yeah. thats my stupid story.
Love is a very small chance of happening for the world and heart of gold that will be crushed and burned within seconds beyond time that goes by in a minute and it will be soon ashes and dust and never can be fixed. Open your eyes, your heart, your mind and kiss it goodbye and soon a new one will be there but only in black gray and white and you will never feel the golden heart again. No matter how hard we all try it can never be fixed. We still try it till this day. The last words of it was "I'm sorry but this can never be fixed I am burning and dieing within seconds, please do not leave me like this, please." and the rest was static and pressure and you will never feel love again like you used to.
может всё и вправду, всё что я делаю бесполезно?
хочется поговорить с одним человеком по душам, не просто через интернет, а в реальной жизни... но я начинаю на себя накручивать и думать, что зря я это всё делаю, я ему безразлична, я такая жалкая, стараюсь привлечь внимание...
страшно. страшно подойти. страшно быть отвергнутой. страшно быть обманутой. страшно думать, что все мои действия были бесполезными.
кажется я люблю этого человека, но не могу принять эти чувства. хочется одновременно послать его и одновременно тянуться к нему.
как. как перестать бегать за людьми. как перестать бегать за людьми, которым на тебя всё равно. как перестать чувствовать тревогу. как преодолеть свой страх. как.....
этот человек...он... может в глубине души он на самом деле ненавидет меня? за мои тупые действия, слова... мне стыдно.
из-за этого я теряю надежду узнать этого человека поближе, заговорить с ним в реальном мире, а не просто активно поболтать в интернете и на тысячу лет замолчать... я не знаю что делать.
hhh i love this song
This song gives me a heartache idk why
this song makes me remember everything that has happened to me
my "best friend" screaming at me
her forcing me into a relationship even though im not lesbian
her making me take the blame on everything
her lies
my cat drowning
my parents secretly giving away our dogs
my parents screaming and fighting
my father almost killing himself right infront of me and my mom
him yelling at me
my teacher yelling at me for not knowing something
my "best friend" acting like im mean to her and not treating her right
im trying
i do everything she says
it hurts
i cant escape
nobody knows i have feelings too
im trying to be nice
but they wont listen
they all want their way
i let them have it
i cant fight back
the feeling.. hurts
it hurts
so bad..
i dont understand
how can others be so happy?
they all say put their feelings first
im doing that
but they're being selfish
im only here because of my family
my mother doesnt feel well
if she gets covid and dies
i wont be able to take it anymore
but what about dad
what about our pets
we cant let them starve
we cant let them be thirsty to death
theres nothing happy anymore
its like, the younger we are the more attention we get
in kindergarten we got to take naps
they expected us to get good sleep
now?
they expect us to study all night
and if we do?
we'll be tired
sleep is more important than school
school is stupid
i dont care if we learn things there
its still stupid
life is hell
its all useless
why cant life be fair
my grandparents are christian, they say god will help us
i dont believe in god
i try to get attention so someone will help
so someone will notice my pain
but they never notice
and they never care
maybe they do see my pain
but they're too selfish to care
they only know that im not them
most likely if i kill myself some will care
but the selfish ones only care when you're dead
right now, they dont give a fuck
if my family starts to die off
i wont care anymore
life will just be pain and suffering
might as well kill myself if they die off
i'll tell my grandma to give my pets new homes when i die
i dont give a fuck if anyone tries to make me feel better or say "look at the bright side"
there is no fucking bright side
maybe i am depressed
but if i told someone they'd be like
"bruh you're so dramatic, you arent dEpReSsEd"
and thats true
doubt is stronger than belief
sadness is stronger than happiness
and thats a fucking fact
i want to tell someone
but feelings hurt
they hurt so bad
i honestly hate life
im only fucking 10
hopefully in 6th grade i can change schools so i dont have to be with my "best friend"
she thinks shes everything
she thinks that shes the fucking boss of the whole school
well she fucking isnt
i wish i never met her
are u 10?
Mayb e you should get off youtube--
@Nɪɢʜᴛᴛɪᴍᴇ ᴀʀᴛɪsᴛ Dude theres so much stuff on the internet thats not good for a 10 yr old to see.
when I listen this song I feel happy but I want to cry...
Minecraft music be like:
Who’s here from Riona Animated’s comment?
Also,you are underrated. People should give you more attention.uwu
@@tigernate4585 wow thank you so much thats so sweet qwq
Nie ja
@@tigernate4585 polaaaaaand
Everlasting Summer...
слишком сильно люблю это
Hey may I know... What animation is this? Is it original by yourself? Who is that girl and what's her name
666 likes 👌
Музыка кайф
Под нее рисовать или думать хорошо ))
Reminding that my parents are getting old with every day.
I've been listening to this song for a long time, qwp it's been a year I think-
Don't cry don't cry.....
The true question is what anime does the background belong to
Something like SSSS.Gridman.
Idk man I hope this helped.
Lazy catt Thank you so much!
Под эту музыку хорошо плакать
Не плакай, всё будет ок :)
@Mimi а что случилось?
@Mimi на счёт помочь Я не уверенна.... Знаешь, у меня раньше тоже было переломное время, но мне всегда помогала музыка и книги.. Может попробуешь что то из этого ( не заставляю, просто советую)
@Mimi рада, что понравилась тебе )
@Mimi прости, но у меня никаких соц сетей нет, к тому же из меня плохой друг..Я мало с кем общаюсь даже в реальной жизни. Извини..
Oh.. I see so much upset and depressed people in comennts. There is no fake smiles or emotions. These are real. Thats the real life. And thats kinda sad.
I managed to think this music is on a weirdcore style
Sad nostalgia.
Life is just one big fucked up reality we have to live through. We always end up dieing in the end tho, so why waste ur time on something like suicide? Idk maybe because you only live through life to go through pain and suffering.
Sad
video was posted a year ago it's so mesmerizing
what's the anime tho
My bf cheath on me...and then bully me...then leaves...
Then some people say dont cry everything is ok. How to stop cry after those?.....
instead of commenting something deep or depressing, can we just talk about the B A S S ?
I'm still here
How to download this?;-;
Go on mp3juice.com and you can download any song
I just want cry 🙂
I’m just a sad mistake I just wish I could be happy for my family and friends but they say BE HAPPY but how could I..? Wut is happy anyway..? :)
It’s nothing my friends said :) so it’s emptiness??
*_-ϟ; ; Beautiful👌😈_*
how about everything? what it is ?
Put the speed up to 2 and you’ll get a enjoyable life for the rest of u lief
Reminds me of Obito kinda..
*_just smile_*
I listen to this because - * - = +
can you make a one hour version?
what show is this picture/ gif from? someone please answer!
When the blinking doesnt line up with the beats
okay