My high school teacher and her husband lived in different states. He had a job in Texas and they came together during the summer months and holidays. She LOVED it. Marriage should be what the couple wants, not what everyone else thinks it should be like. I truly believe that is why so many marriages end in divorce, because we are not being our true selves.
Your high school teachers situation is different. He moved because of his job. Same like an army's wife or some line of work that makes husband and wife to live in different states or countries. These two got married for the wrong reasons as they themselves admit. To satisfy both their families. That was a dumb move. After 7 years they found marriage is not for them. First they had no kids after 7 years. Do you see where I am going?? They are liars who are just looking for validation of the pathetic situation. There's nothing as an unconventional marriage. They should have had a divorce and revert back to boy friend, and girl friend, have a good time and have sex. That's all that is keeping them together. Those two are intellectual idoits.
Where are yall now? I just looked their story up and they are still married but they are back living together in Los Angeles. I’m asking because yesterday my wife said she wants to make this same type of last ditch effort to save our marriage. She loves me and I love her, but living together (mainly on her end) isn’t working.
FINALLY AN AFFIRMATION THAT EVERYONE'S MARRIAGE IS DIFFERENT!! My Husband and I met on a dating website in 2016, got engaged in 2017 and married in 2018. We turned Fifty together and its a first marriage for the both of us !! A former friend suggested that I date out of state. Another friend suggested the dating website. My Husband lives in Pennsylvania and I live in NYC !! I work in NYC and care for my elderly Mother, with my adult Son's help. I go home every weekend. I owned my own house in NYC and we built a home together in 2021!! Friends and Family constantly asked us, " How will this work" ? We never answered them. Fast forward, we just celebrated our fourth wedding anniversary, March 2022 !! We are still dating and are very, very Happy !!! Signed a Mrs. who Mr. is still courting her !!!
You are confusing the two situations. In your case you live and work in NYC, and then take care of your mom 👩. These two fools were in a love relationship, got married just to satisfy their parents. How dumb is that. They were not ready. 7 years in their marriage, no kids. That would have been a game changer. They are liars. They're hiding the fundamental reason they decided to live apart, in the same city, 15mns drive from each other. That's laughable. They realize all they have between them is hanging out, having a good time and sex. They are on public media seeking validation for their pathetic sharm.
I STRONGLY believe that you ARE happier, when you have the "space" to BE yourself. Comfort trumps Love. When you start FEELING uncomfortable in your own space (ie. feeling like you're being swallowed whole), THAT is when you start looking for an 'outlet'. This beautiful couple proves that giving your partner the chance to be themselves (as you should in the first place), can not only work.. but STRENGTHEN the relationship. And as we can clearly see.. they WANT to be together and it isn't about looking for an opportunity for cheating.
The happiest people are people who can be themselves despite whose around. So you are being silly, you are with someone you can't be yourself this is a huge relationship problem and can't even live with because you can't be yourself. That's not something that can be fixed that's why they have to live apart.
@@ASmith-jn7kf Are you sure that makes them who can weather a relationship through thick & thin, be themselves no matter what the situation the "happiest" people? I was married for 18 years, and the opposite sex can be stressful, and stress isn't always a happy situation
Let people breathe! There are many ways to show love...be in love...and nurture love. Some marriages break up because couples are growing apart from being together all of the time. This couple negotiated their marriage. Love it! Happiness is different for different people!!
I have been married twice, now dating which may lead to marriage I have already settled in by myself. If I do get married again I think I’ll consider this.. truly love this idea.
@@innocentbeautytreatments3287No, it's not. You would have the best of both worlds: Cuddles and companionship with your hubby when you want it, and your own space when you want it. What's not to like?!
Agreed I was actually thinking about this myself like if I ever was to be married would I really want to live with my significant other or live apart from them.
I’ve always said this, and people look at me like I'm crazy! Autonomy in a relationship is a non-negotiable for me. I’m so happy to see that someone is successful with this lifestyle choice. Their bravery has saved their marriage.
@@TheBrownIsland that goes without saying. Just as cohabitating does not work for MOST. To each their own 🤷🏾♀ An open mindset to find what works for YOU does work though. Peace & blessings.
In a world where divorce, adultery & murder is the solution to many relationship issues, I salute them for finding an amicable resolution... while getting to know each other better and increasing their love + affection. 🙏💖🙏
Good point. But those are extreme situations you’re mentioning. Those extremes are avoided by normal, healthy individuals. Healthy individuals just divorce. TBH. They ought to have just stayed BF/GF long term instead of getting married IMHO There’s some bizarre element at play here that makes it enticing. But if it works for them, okay. As long as NO ONE is getting hurt and everyone is happy.
They got married for the wrong reasons. And it failed after 7 years. It's not working for them. If it were, they would not be on public media for validation. They should divorce but stay together like they are without calling it a marriage. There's nothing as an unconventional marriage. They are a couple of liars and enlightened fools.
The only reason I'm not married...I can't do someone everyday. No sure if it would work for everyone. Someone for sure would screw it up. Parties, Stupid Friends, Sleep overs, this works well for good smart people. Not Dummies... Would friends of the opposite sex be allowed over?
@@songsalon7868 I believe it becomes hard to live with someone when you lived singlely for so long. I guess for an unconventional marriage like this one, boundaries will have to be set. Maybe no friends of the opposite sex under the same roof, respectively!
I actually prefer this. I will do this with my future wife one day. Just because your married that doesn’t mean you have to stay under the same roof. I just feel I need my own personal space. My future wife can come over whenever she wants. I’m very independent by nature.
@@carolmukuha91 Why Not ! As noted above #togetherapart ! They may as well get used to the together and apart aspect of life early enough as both are inevitable and realities seldom addressed /present in conversations!
I live separate from my husband , we stay together when we want too and we stay separate when we like , we have kids and everything is nice and normal and a great family life
This would work for me too but I'd rather have this arrangement in a duplex. That way, we'd be closer to each other in case of an emergency or just to get together at the spur of the moment without having to travel the 15 min. distance. Whenever we decided to move back in together, we could rent the other side out.
Halfway thru this video, I realized Tamron was imposing her values on this couple. "Can't you just suffer through 3 nights a week together?" That's precisely why they are choosing to live apart, they don't want to "suffer" to be together. Funny how a wealthy woman like Tamron values a few coins over joy and peace as this couple is doing. I think she secretly envies them. They have my utmost respect.
I thought the exact same thing listening to Tamron’s remarks. Marriage shouldn’t have to include suffering. There is no prize for marriage martyrdom. Live happily and love honesty. This couple sure has!
When doubters or haters stop trying to picture themselves in this situation, and embrace the fact that it works for them, more people can celebrate this version of marriage. This couple is doing what’s in their best interest and obviously maintaining their own sense of independence while in a relationship, and more importantly they’re maintaining and supporting their individual mental health.
I think Tameron struggled with this concept, despite it working for them and (surprisingly) making sense. They married before they were ready, caving in to family pressure, which isn't a confident or authentic entry into marriage. They are now dating themselves back into a marriage of their own making and choice, unpressured. Good for them!
Tamron is low-key judging them.but people reject the unfamiliar...let them be great...This is not a bad idea if it works for them..I want to follow this couple...I wonder if they have a you tube channel..
Yes once married, it's a challenge to differenciate between caring and care-taking your partner. Before you know it, you do everything for her or him, and forget about yourself.
This is easier done than most believe, it is a matter of mindset. My hubby and I have been together 12 years and in different countries and 100% faithful. The way people choose to live LOVE in motion varies and it is interesting to hear how people "think" a relationship should work. Many people "living together, under the same roof" are not happy in their relationships. Let's drop what "traditional" means because quite often it is not what creates joy for everyone.
@@maryihezie1190You seriously think he is 100% faithful? I highly doubt it. The guy in this episode is not faithful either. Living in separate states or countries from your spouse breeds cheating.
Very compelling idea. One thing I regret about moving directly from my parents home to live with my husband is never having had a place of my own to decorate and organize exactly how I want. It’s good to see people experiment with other ways of doing things and knowing there are lots of possibilities.
I've lived alone, I promise it is not fun and is very overrated. Waking up to complete silence everyday eventually becomes maddening. @@Breakingthebond
I looked up where they are now and basically this is exactly what she said and was going through. That she never lived alone . They are back living together and are married still and she claims their marriage is all the better for it.
Over the years I've read a lot about LAT (living apart together) couples and it’s actually popular outside of the US especially with people who already have established lives. This is absolutely positively the only way id get married. Kinda hard to find a guy that would buy into this but if I ever do and he's the right fit, its the only way id get married. I think the divorce rate would decrease a lot if couples weren’t feeling the constant daily pressures of living with each other. I absolutely enjoy living alone and i just can’t imagine putting up with someone else day in and day out until death do us part. No matter how much i love them, that set up wouldn’t work for me. Congratulations to this couple for not allowing society to dictate what marriage means to them.
I find it suprising that men would not agree to this. I myself am currently thinking about this, after having experienced marriage and the gripes that come along with cohabitation.
Sort of like this arrangement. Had to separate a little from my husband living in another country. It actually bring a spark to the marriage. So much passion when we are together. Now living together its get boring, have to work harder to get the sparks going. Absence make the heart grow fonder.
I was separated from my husband of 25 yrs for the past 15 months living separately n our own apts.It helped us to realize while we loved each other, things had changed n our relationship and the relationship was strained due to some serious life issues & stale relationship. We have worked on ourselves independently through therapy, and changing destructive personal behaviors then after 15 mos.some unexpected family deaths changed our perspectives to do better while we have this life to do it. Life is too short! Living apart became expensive but was so worth it to realize you should keep trying to improve yourself for the better. Divorce actions never happened so we realized we wanted to remain together. (In Sickness& Health)
I talked to a stranger not too long ago and he mentioned being married for 43 years. I asked him the secret to the long lasting marriage and his response was “I worked away from home. That’s the only reason we made it work”
Most people work away from home and yet they still struggle to make relationships work when living together so that doesn’t make a lot of sense generally speaking.
This is so refreshing to watch, I can definitely relate. In my 20s I felt I lost myself in my relationships and became a version of myself I could hardly recognise. Always felt I needed my partner and they needed me as well, and our relationship became very codependent in a toxic way. In my late 20s and 30s I embraced being single and was able to see a side myself I just loved. I traveled, explored, discovered new things I didn't realize I missed out on in life and for the first time I felt free. Free of peoples expectations or ideals of who I was suppose to be. I made a conscious decision to reflect on who I am and my purpose in life and navigate life with pure intention. Blessings to this lovely couple and doing what works for them.
Her first mistake was cooking only meals that he likes. Marriage is about compromise. Falling in love is a phase that goes away. It lasts 2 to 3 years at most. It prepares you for true love down the road if you stick it out. People who chase romance and divorce the minute they fall out of love will never experience true love. After the passion fades, you see the true heart and soul of a person. If you still like the person after the passion fades, then you have found your soul mate. Hang in there. I wish you the best.
You are so right! All that excitement fades, then you get to the real meat years down the road. Also, marriage is cyclical. Some days you’ll be in love, some not so much. You got to stick it out #almost19years
My husband & I have been married for 7 yrs and we live apart, as being a older couple coming into the marriage we each own our house outright. He still has a business so he works 12 hrs a day. I see him a lot during the week but our time together is weekends. We just live 2 miles apart. Another thing we have pets & they don't get along so we keep them apart.
My sister and her husband have been married for about 15 years and they each have their own home. He kept his home when they got married and my sister later bought her own house. When I was younger I thought it was odd, but I’m understanding that it works for them.
@@candacedawn357 Well, there’s a level up of commitment in marriage. They are now in their 60’s and want to show that they are committed to each other.
I love Tamron, but what kind of question is "so do you consider yourself single??" when she clearly invited them on as a married couple who lives separately? SMH
@@lighteningsnips They've been married for 11 years and they're still together and happily married. They "spend the night" over to each other's homes and see each other every night as they only live several blocks away. They came into the union owning their own homes and with their own kids I think it's a perfect setup as the kids get to stay in their own space and everything is the same. It's fun in my opinion as they get to have daily getaways and have a change of space on a week to week basis.
@@ibiminaabiye257 Same here! I have my own home and kids and I would like someone who has their own space. I've been married before and we all lived under one roof and it was hell on earth.....for EVERYONE involved.
I'm happy to see that they're happy! Traditional/conservative/conventional marriages and relationships aren't for everyone. Knowing how different people are, it boggles my mind that we expect everyone to fit the same mold. As long as both parties are respectful and it works for them, then leave them be.
Finally people who think the same way I do ! This is what I have been 🗣🗣 shouting from the roof tops ! No desire to marry anyone ! I will have a dedicated partner and so will I be, we can visit each other any time BUT live separately! I love ❤️ my life , space and sanity and self being !
I absolutely love this idea! I was talking with a friend about it just a few days ago and she totally agreed. I am such an independent person, do not like to feel smothered and I realize that I do not want someone in my face 24/7, no matter how much I love them. I think it would keep things exciting. Of course that could change, but for now that is how I feel.
I absolutely love this idea, the only thing is this takes two absolute " grown" mature adults that don't use actually use this time to simply cheat on their spouse. The door is literally wide open.
@@FitPasson if someone's inclined to cheat, I don't think living arrangements will get in their way. But yes, whatever people choose both parties need to be open and honest about what they really want
This concept seemed like it can work for couples with no children. But when children are in the mix it's a different ball game. I do know at the end of the day companionship and love is what most crave. Kudos to them.
This is so true. Maybe they have no,plans for children. Honestly, I think I& it works for them then ok but it’s only five months in so they are back into the honeymoon phase. It sounds like they don’t know how to compromise. At some point they will have to face those same issues that drove them to live apart.
Currently living married but separately and we have two children. Long story short our kids are happier than ever. Happy parents equals happy children. We both love each other but have different routines, different ways of managing money, different ways of running household duties, etc. It caused too much friction. As is, with small children and working crazy hours we were burnt out. It broke us and we were talking it out on each other. Constant arguments and our children? Suffering. For the sake of staying married and our children's wellness and happiness we chose to live separately. We see each other all the time pretty much every day or every other day. Before we didn't go out much because we were angry at each other and worn out now all the sudden were going out all the time as a family making memories, we laugh more we enjoy more because we don't have tension. When I come to my place after a stressful day of work I release that at my own place. When we meet up I'm refreshed and positive. Our kids are very happy with our new life style the way they look at it is "we have two houses! That is so cool" my son brags about it all the time now lol
My husband and I been married 10 going on 11yrs and we been in a LAT marriage for 3 years and we love it and it work great for us. Yes it’s can be expensive but I don’t think we would ever live together again. We do stay at each other home 3-4 times a week and have full access to each other home. We promise to stay close to each other for the kids and in case of an emergency so our home is about 3-5 min apart from each other.
I am no longer that person I was when I married. Marriage life can be suffocating especially when children are involved. How can one regain their sense of independence while still being devoted to one’s family?
What a beautiful couple 💑 . I hope people get the message that YOUR marriage is YOURs. As long as you are happy, respectful, considerate, loyal, mature, and (please) private in making decisions. The only person you need to answer to is each other. I love this!
I so agree with their approach & would definitely do this. If finances were tight, the alternative would be get a place big enough so that we can have separate bedroom and our own bathroom. We'd be both responsible for cleaning our own bedroom & bathroom, but have a cleaning rota for the rest of the home aka the communal areas.
Bingo!!!!!! I've rejected a marriage proposal before because he wanted us to live in a two bed condo. I told him if I did that I would end up hating him immediately. He didn't want to spend his money on a bigger house. Space is the secret ingredient in relationships! That's why men like going out to work.😂😂
Exactly why living apart was necessary to save my marriage. My husband is messy AF I'm OCD. We love each other but not enough to compromise my sanity. It's worked wonders. I have a clean house and now he's learning the hardship of maintaining a house. My anxiety has gone down and he's been more active and is more in top of things.
From a baby boomer perspective . This sounds heaven. Keeping your independence sll of it. Is sooooo key for ONENESS. Being a minimalist. I perfer to have less stuff and more peace. Think about the amount of stress living together it cost
Love this…”union” isn’t just physical. There are so many sad ppl in their driveways dreading going into their homes. Like H.E.R. said “cause I feel alone even when we’re alone.” Who wants to “suffer?!?!?” They’re making it work for them so they can keep the spark. 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
There are many people who are married and live together and go on date nights and don't regret coming home and probably more people dating waiting to break up with someone and very unhappy You people only like this because it's different.
A good relationship needs being together and spending enough time apart from each other. Being together all the time kills the passion and creates stress.
My Uncle snored Soo bad that his wife had to sleep in another room🥴. They stayed married until they took their last breath. Always showing Love to each other and others😊
I get what they are saying. They had to separate in order to put the spark back into their marriage. They want to feel the dating chemistry again, but I also sense that in their culture divorce maybe frowned upon. It feels to me that they are doing anything to make their marriage work to avoid backlash from their families. They may genuinely care/love each other but may not be meant to be married.
@@Morrocanprincess This video is about two people who made a DECISION to put their PERSONAL LIFE on social media and the Tamron Hall Show for the world to see. I gave my OPINION on the information that was discussed. Simple as that.
I love this and love all the positive comments. We’ve decided after 3 years of marriage, that we’ll be living apart while married. I’m looking forward to it. We too, were very independent individuals prior to getting together.
Look at how she looks at her husband. She's obviously giddy and head over heels with him. This arrangement looks like the best thing that could have happened to them and their marriage, so I support them and wish them all the best.
Wow!! This was quite intriguing. But I found myself smiling a lot while looking at them and listening to their story. I love it! All the best to their journey ❤️.
Lovely couple. this is what you get when parents pressure to have their kids married right after college. they don't get dating time and getting to know each other
As crazy as this sounds…. I could soooo do this. Problem with being together is, you end up with resentment and the other person feels like they’re being robbed. I get the SACRIFICE thing, and I believe it’s good to take your eyes off of yourself and focus on helping others but sometimes not everyone is meant to live under the same roof. Sometime two people just don’t get along after 2 days. Better to live separate and date. When you’re tired of hearing all the nonrealistic things the other spouse is talking about and nodding your head to all the excuses…. You can call it a night and just go home. I like it
As a Desi person I just loved learning this couples journey! It truly is beautiful that in this day and age that many people are choosing to have relationships that is the perfect shape for them regardless of societal/ cultural norms. May we all live& honor the within truth our souls ✨
Love this. I'm in this situation and can completely relate to her. Giving examples as to why this is beneficial for some couples is hard because you have to live through it to understand it.
I have always wondered why a 'temporary separation' is hardly ever recommended to couples going through a tough season. The show host demonstrates the type of stereotype that even prevents people from thinking this way. This couple may have stumbled on something golden. It is very likely that they would be in a much worse place now if they had continued to live together.
Many people get separated and it doesn't fix anything, sometimes it is recommended in court and even mandated in some states before divorce. Separation doesn't necessarily fix issues. It depends on what the issues are. Like he said, they were looking for excitement and they found it. Not everyone needs that day in and day out.
@@ASmith-jn7kf I had this thought too however by the time a case gets to court it is usually too late. The friction within the relationship would have eaten in too deep. By that time, the separation would do little or no good. The unique thing about this couple is that they didn't wait till things got too sour before they decided on the separation approach.. and it worked like a charm for them..
Why do they feel like putting their spouses interest ahead of theirs is a bad thing? That is what love does. Love is not selfish. Love looks out for the one loved and this helps the relationship mature.
You should take care of yourself more than you do others so you can care for them. If she felt she was loosing herself, that wasn't healthy and would bring her depression
One of my friends from church and her husband are living in separate houses. It even more special that they have adult children. They both seem to be doing pretty well with it. Your relationship is your relationship. You can do it however you want to do it. You are you. God bless you guys have a great day. A
I looooooves this. Forget what people think. You guys look happy!!! One of my favorite married couples they have a family home and maybe 15 minutes away they have a fully furnished 1 bedroom apartment. When they need time apart or one needs a break from the kids they go there and read, relax, whatever. They call it their best kept secret.
Once you live long enough, you realize you must figure out what works for you versus adhering to what most people do or what others THINK you should do. We spend the first part of life being indoctrinated with society rules and standards. If you're lucky you get to spend the rest of your life removing what doesn't work and implementing what does.
The main thing that keep a marriage balanced and healthy, "communication" the good and bad. They had the hard and uncomfortable conversations and both realized, we're on the same page with this arrangement. Kudos for them 🎯👏🏾. Do whatever makes your marriage work because there are just two people who matter!!!
I love this for both of them. They get to have time to focus on themselves and time to focus on each other without it being mundane and a given... it's almost like living outside of default. 🥰
I’m glad it works for them and that they found happiness in an unconventional way. If you married to someone but have to be distant from each other to find happiness, then you weren’t meant to be with each other so you should stay single until you find the right person. The thing about it is that people afraid to be single so they settle for less and find themselves unhappy. (Their situation is unique because of the culture, pressure and stigma)
That’s not at all what is happening here. I am independent to the point that no matter who I love or how hard I love them I will never want to share a house with someone. That doesn’t mean I married or fell in love with the wrong person. Or that I shouldn’t be allowed to have a happy marriage. It means I want my own space to live in. What’s wrong with that?
10 seconds in and I loved the video I DO get this and love it!!! Whatever the reason living seperately I think saves marriages and nope Ive never been married. But, the older I get I see marriage looking like this! And its "unconventional" based on these crazy rules of society. Create the life YOU want!
This won’t work for me and my husband but glad they found their own workable arrangement. When kids get involved how would that work. I enjoy the married life of being together, cuddling and working things out. Also our kids love having their dad at home. Yes life can get hectic. We both work. I currently work from home but we have arrangement that works for us whilst being in the house. We help each other to ensure the house and kids are looked after and still try to find time for each other. Yes sometimes we are just tired but that is life of being parents and being married. 🤪
Ammarah, if you and your husband got married for more realistically mature reasons then they did. I can see why you feel this wouldn't work. Totally makes sense to me.
@@user-en1zc5vd6y exactly. Loving someone 24/7 mood 😂😂😂. I like knowing he is next to me. 🤣🤣🤣. Also marriage is about experiencing your other half in all elements. They will find it hard living full time together if kids come into play
@@distorbia20 talk about the MOOD!!!! Lol But I like the fact that they are trying whatever they can to be happy. many married couples resign themselves to unhappiness coz these kinda ideas seems crazy.
I Love this!!!! This is something I’ve seriously thought about while dating. If I ever get to the point of remarriage I would hope to have the conversation and understanding from my man to agree to this even if it’s short term. If it works for them then great!!
My husband and I are married 36 years. He worked 14 hours or so a day. I took care of the kids and worked part time when they were in school. The last 7 years he works in SC and I stayed in NC.He visits every other week and we speak many times throughout the day. In a few years he will retire and move back home. It can work but not for everyone. There has to be trust, you can’t be a jealous person and of course, you have to love each other still. ❤️
They love and care about each other to make their marriage work , they're happy and that's all that matters . I get it ,the romance and spark fades over time when you're together all the time ,some space created between you was Soo needed . Happy that this is working for you!
@@grannyklampit1710 It's New York and the city at that. Good luck with that. Let people live! It's not our journey it's theirs. Never know what's gonna happen in the end and marriage is hard and boring oh and did I say a bit miserable for most. If they are happy, let them have it.
@@nope9905 (gyah, you're whiny) I absolutely f*cking hate people who act as though a comment is somehow stopping people from doing whatever the hell is that they're doing. I'm not opposed to having separate spaces in a marriage. But, to me, two separate apartments on the opposite sides of town seems impractical. That's my perspective which I am entitled to have and it has zero effect on the strangers being interviewed. If you don't like it, GET over it and move on. You're exhausting. Go away. Deal with your many issues. Keep your negativity about marriage to your lonesome self. Bye.
I've been saying this for some time, I honestly understand it. I do think you should try living together first so you feel the difference and appreciate it more. I like this and it works if both ppl can he trusted and are committed to the relationship.
I’ve always said that i need my own home when I’m married. I believe everyone needs their own space/ in whatever form that is. I’m a lil complex so it’s not for everyone. 🗣i love you but gimmie my space….at times.
My relationship was way stronger and healthier when my boyfriend and I lived apart. But ever since he moved in last July we fight all the time he sleeps in the different bedroom.. We never have date night the highlight of my day is to see him and I get to cook dinner for him…. Even when he gets off at midnight. As result I’ve put on a lot of weight. I wish we could afford to live apart but my rent just increased $750 a month so now I really need him as a roommate.
Well I guess they said no need to fake it rather than divorce this situation works for them. I believe once they get to where they going in there career they will be in the same house. They seem happy to me.When you don't see each other when you do you spice it up. I'm all for it.
While this may seem unusual, My partner and I and I that live together have been experiencing a similar scenario. Our couples counselor recommended living separately while we try to repair ourselves and the relationship. We haven't decided yet what we're going to do … While it would be In uncomfortable situation it's not worse than us breaking up.
Where I'm from alot of couples are involuntarily separated by work. They only see each other once a month or so. I've always found it sad butt after watching these two maybe it isn't so bad.
My soon to be husbae/ fiancé is a truck driver… I love the time apart bc when we’re together it is a relief for him to rest and just be taken care of and I love taking care of him… when he’s on the road I get extra me time, gym time etc without feeling like I’m leaving him… it’s wonderful.
I think this is absolutely beautiful! ❤️ This is not a strange arrangement for me because I've always said I wanted to live in separate houses when I get married. I just felt like it would keep things between us fresh and new. Unfortunately I also thought this way for selfish reasons as well. Now, I'm on the fence about it. Seeing this couple definitely has me to keep an open mind about this type of arrangement though. I'm with them, if it's working for them...so be it. Everything is not for every person but it clearly works for them. I love it!! ❤️
My high school teacher and her husband lived in different states. He had a job in Texas and they came together during the summer months and holidays. She LOVED it. Marriage should be what the couple wants, not what everyone else thinks it should be like. I truly believe that is why so many marriages end in divorce, because we are not being our true selves.
Your high school teachers situation is different. He moved because of his job. Same like an army's wife or some line of work that makes husband and wife to live in different states or countries. These two got married for the wrong reasons as they themselves admit. To satisfy both their families. That was a dumb move. After 7 years they found marriage is not for them. First they had no kids after 7 years. Do you see where I am going?? They are liars who are just looking for validation of the pathetic situation. There's nothing as an unconventional marriage. They should have had a divorce and revert back to boy friend, and girl friend, have a good time and have sex. That's all that is keeping them together. Those two are intellectual idoits.
That’s not enough sex 😬 I’m sure someone was cheating.
Agreed
I'd love this kind of marriage. I need a lot of space and alone time.
To have someone in your face 24/7 is daunting for me...
Me and my husband live separate and we have fallen in love all over again it works!
Where are yall now? I just looked their story up and they are still married but they are back living together in Los Angeles.
I’m asking because yesterday my wife said she wants to make this same type of last ditch effort to save our marriage. She loves me and I love her, but living together (mainly on her end) isn’t working.
FINALLY AN AFFIRMATION THAT EVERYONE'S MARRIAGE IS DIFFERENT!! My Husband and I met on a dating website in 2016, got engaged in 2017 and married in 2018. We turned Fifty together and its a first marriage for the both of us !! A former friend suggested that I date out of state. Another friend suggested the dating website. My Husband lives in Pennsylvania and I live in NYC !! I work in NYC and care for my elderly Mother, with my adult Son's help. I go home every weekend. I owned my own house in NYC and we built a home together in 2021!! Friends and Family constantly asked us, " How will this work" ? We never answered them.
Fast forward, we just celebrated our fourth wedding anniversary, March 2022 !! We are still dating and are very, very Happy !!!
Signed a Mrs. who Mr. is still courting her !!!
You go to Pennsylvania every weekend?
@@nsanenthembrane If "home" is in Pennsylvania where her husband lives, then it's only a few hours away from NYC. A quick road trip. Nothing major.
You are confusing the two situations. In your case you live and work in NYC, and then take care of your mom 👩. These two fools were in a love relationship, got married just to satisfy their parents. How dumb is that. They were not ready. 7 years in their marriage, no kids. That would have been a game changer. They are liars. They're hiding the fundamental reason they decided to live apart, in the same city, 15mns drive from each other. That's laughable. They realize all they have between them is hanging out, having a good time and sex. They are on public media seeking validation for their pathetic sharm.
This is wonderful! Everyone’s situation is unique. If it works, it works! Happy Anniversary!
Awesome
I definitely want separate bedrooms. I think lots of people need their own space. It’s not a bad thing.
I thought I was crazy to think like this
@@innocentbeautytreatments3287 No you are not
Me too..Separate bedrooms all day long...I like to hit the snooze button like 6 times
Good for you.
@@innocentbeautytreatments3287 If you thought you were crazy, then so am I!
I STRONGLY believe that you ARE happier, when you have the "space" to BE yourself.
Comfort trumps Love.
When you start FEELING uncomfortable in your own space (ie. feeling like you're being swallowed whole), THAT is when you start looking for an 'outlet'.
This beautiful couple proves that giving your partner the chance to be themselves (as you should in the first place), can not only work.. but STRENGTHEN the relationship. And as we can clearly see.. they WANT to be together and it isn't about looking for an opportunity for cheating.
The happiest people are people who can be themselves despite whose around. So you are being silly, you are with someone you can't be yourself this is a huge relationship problem and can't even live with because you can't be yourself. That's not something that can be fixed that's why they have to live apart.
@@ASmith-jn7kf Are you sure that makes them who can weather a relationship through thick & thin, be themselves no matter what the situation the "happiest" people? I was married for 18 years, and the opposite sex can be stressful, and stress isn't always a happy situation
@@ASmith-jn7kf Also, your comment got no likes or dislikes at all, and there is a boatload of likes for their relationship
Let people breathe! There are many ways to show love...be in love...and nurture love. Some marriages break up because couples are growing apart from being together all of the time. This couple negotiated their marriage. Love it! Happiness is different for different people!!
This would be an IDEAL marriage for me!!
I would love a house a couple doors down from my husband😆 is that weird 🤔
I have been married twice, now dating which may lead to marriage I have already settled in by myself. If I do get married again I think I’ll consider this.. truly love this idea.
@@innocentbeautytreatments3287No, it's not. You would have the best of both worlds: Cuddles and companionship with your hubby when you want it, and your own space when you want it. What's not to like?!
What's not to love about this living situation? Don't we wished we knew this before? Hell to the YES!!! #togetherapart
Agreed I was actually thinking about this myself like if I ever was to be married would I really want to live with my significant other or live apart from them.
I always thought about this marriage 💑 situation, and yes, this is for me🤗🤗🤗
Why get married? Just remain in a committed relationship without being married
@@shanb4520 They mentioned early in the video that they were pressured by parents
It's better to marry and live separately than to fornicate and commit adultery🤔
This is the marriage that would work for me
😂😂
Go for it🙏
YES!!! This would be the PERFECT arrangement for me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!😊
Me too 🤣
It sounds great to me.
I’ve always said this, and people look at me like I'm crazy! Autonomy in a relationship is a non-negotiable for me. I’m so happy to see that someone is successful with this lifestyle choice. Their bravery has saved their marriage.
Then do it. Just know this does Not work for MOST.
@@TheBrownIsland that goes without saying. Just as cohabitating does not work for MOST. To each their own 🤷🏾♀ An open mindset to find what works for YOU does work though. Peace & blessings.
In a world where divorce, adultery & murder is the solution to many relationship issues, I salute them for finding an amicable resolution... while getting to know each other better and increasing their love + affection. 🙏💖🙏
Good point. But those are extreme situations you’re mentioning. Those extremes are avoided by normal, healthy individuals. Healthy individuals just divorce.
TBH. They ought to have just stayed BF/GF long term instead of getting married IMHO
There’s some bizarre element at play here that makes it enticing. But if it works for them, okay. As long as NO ONE is getting hurt and everyone is happy.
This was interesting. I like seeing all perspectives of how people do their relationship. Do what works for yall. No one else.
Agreed
They got married for the wrong reasons. And it failed after 7 years. It's not working for them. If it were, they would not be on public media for validation. They should divorce but stay together like they are without calling it a marriage. There's nothing as an unconventional marriage. They are a couple of liars and enlightened fools.
🙄🙄
this!
@@bfj1958 You sound real bitter.
I'm totally cool with this unconventional relationship. We all need a break from each other😊.
The only reason I'm not married...I can't do someone everyday.
No sure if it would work for everyone.
Someone for sure would screw it up.
Parties, Stupid Friends, Sleep overs, this works well for good smart people.
Not Dummies...
Would friends of the opposite sex be allowed over?
@@songsalon7868 I believe it becomes hard to live with someone when you lived singlely for so long. I guess for an unconventional marriage like this one, boundaries will have to be set. Maybe no friends of the opposite sex under the same roof, respectively!
Yes!😊😊
5-6 months? I've lived like this with my wonderful husband for 4 years. It's incredible!
When your with the right person it works. 💞
Is it possible with kids?
I actually prefer this. I will do this with my future wife one day. Just because your married that doesn’t mean you have to stay under the same roof. I just feel I need my own personal space. My future wife can come over whenever she wants. I’m very independent by nature.
So the children, if any, will have two homes?
Amen !
@@carolmukuha91 Why Not ! As noted above #togetherapart ! They may as well get used to the together and apart aspect of life early enough as both are inevitable and realities seldom addressed /present in conversations!
I live separate from my husband , we stay together when we want too and we stay separate when we like , we have kids and everything is nice and normal and a great family life
I love this make romance much better
This would work for me too but I'd rather have this arrangement in a duplex. That way, we'd be closer to each other in case of an emergency or just to get together at the spur of the moment without having to travel the 15 min. distance. Whenever we decided to move back in together, we could rent the other side out.
💯💯💯💡💡💡
I was just thinking about this the other day...
That's a great idea!
I thought the same thing! When I'm tired of you, please retreat to your other side of our home!! LOL!
@@ursamajor6347 yes. I'd want to be able to walk quickly and comfortably to my husband's house and but have to drive.
Halfway thru this video, I realized Tamron was imposing her values on this couple. "Can't you just suffer through 3 nights a week together?" That's precisely why they are choosing to live apart, they don't want to "suffer" to be together. Funny how a wealthy woman like Tamron values a few coins over joy and peace as this couple is doing. I think she secretly envies them. They have my utmost respect.
I thought the exact same thing listening to Tamron’s remarks. Marriage shouldn’t have to include suffering. There is no prize for marriage martyrdom. Live happily and love honesty. This couple sure has!
When doubters or haters stop trying to picture themselves in this situation, and embrace the fact that it works for them, more people can celebrate this version of marriage. This couple is doing what’s in their best interest and obviously maintaining their own sense of independence while in a relationship, and more importantly they’re maintaining and supporting their individual mental health.
I think Tameron struggled with this concept, despite it working for them and (surprisingly) making sense. They married before they were ready, caving in to family pressure, which isn't a confident or authentic entry into marriage. They are now dating themselves back into a marriage of their own making and choice, unpressured. Good for them!
Tamron is low-key judging them.but people reject the unfamiliar...let them be great...This is not a bad idea if it works for them..I want to follow this couple...I wonder if they have a you tube channel..
I don't believe she was judging. She was only curious and asked questions which she felt her audience wanted to know.
It's genius.
@@katiepop3442 it’s her show. She decided to bring them on the first place because she was curiosity.
@@candacedawn357 Exactly.
Yes once married, it's a challenge to differenciate between caring and care-taking your partner. Before you know it, you do everything for her or him, and forget about yourself.
This is easier done than most believe, it is a matter of mindset. My hubby and I have been together 12 years and in different countries and 100% faithful. The way people choose to live LOVE in motion varies and it is interesting to hear how people "think" a relationship should work. Many people "living together, under the same roof" are not happy in their relationships. Let's drop what "traditional" means because quite often it is not what creates joy for everyone.
Love that!
@@maryihezie1190You seriously think he is 100% faithful? I highly doubt it. The guy in this episode is not faithful either. Living in separate states or countries from your spouse breeds cheating.
You are faithful.You could only trust yourself.
Very compelling idea. One thing I regret about moving directly from my parents home to live with my husband is never having had a place of my own to decorate and organize exactly how I want. It’s good to see people experiment with other ways of doing things and knowing there are lots of possibilities.
I'm in the same position as a wife and I struggle with this everyday. Not his fault, it's just how things planned out
I've lived alone, I promise it is not fun and is very overrated. Waking up to complete silence everyday eventually becomes maddening. @@Breakingthebond
I looked up where they are now and basically this is exactly what she said and was going through. That she never lived alone . They are back living together and are married still and she claims their marriage is all the better for it.
Over the years I've read a lot about LAT (living apart together) couples and it’s actually popular outside of the US especially with people who already have established lives. This is absolutely positively the only way id get married. Kinda hard to find a guy that would buy into this but if I ever do and he's the right fit, its the only way id get married. I think the divorce rate would decrease a lot if couples weren’t feeling the constant daily pressures of living with each other. I absolutely enjoy living alone and i just can’t imagine putting up with someone else day in and day out until death do us part. No matter how much i love them, that set up wouldn’t work for me. Congratulations to this couple for not allowing society to dictate what marriage means to them.
I feel the same way. I have only met one man that said he was ok with it, but he wasn’t really.
If you find a guy who is okay with this, marry him because he won't be a control freak. I love being a LAT couple!
I love this idea, but my boyfriend does not agree.
@@Mysterygirl77320 that’s cuz most men want you to be a live in maid and sex servant
I find it suprising that men would not agree to this. I myself am currently thinking about this, after having experienced marriage and the gripes that come along with cohabitation.
Sort of like this arrangement. Had to separate a little from my husband living in another country. It actually bring a spark to the marriage. So much passion when we are together. Now living together its get boring, have to work harder to get the sparks going. Absence make the heart grow fonder.
I know... Exactly
I was separated from my husband of 25 yrs for the past 15 months living separately n our own apts.It helped us to realize while we loved each other, things had changed n our relationship and the relationship was strained due to some serious life issues & stale relationship. We have worked on ourselves independently through therapy, and changing destructive personal behaviors then after 15 mos.some unexpected family deaths changed our perspectives to do better while we have this life to do it. Life is too short! Living apart became expensive but was so worth it to realize you should keep trying to improve yourself for the better. Divorce actions never happened so we realized we wanted to remain together.
(In Sickness& Health)
I always say, I want this marriage setup. I applaud them, for doing what's best for them.
I talked to a stranger not too long ago and he mentioned being married for 43 years. I asked him the secret to the long lasting marriage and his response was “I worked away from home. That’s the only reason we made it work”
Most people work away from home and yet they still struggle to make relationships work when living together so that doesn’t make a lot of sense generally speaking.
This is so refreshing to watch, I can definitely relate. In my 20s I felt I lost myself in my relationships and became a version of myself I could hardly recognise. Always felt I needed my partner and they needed me as well, and our relationship became very codependent in a toxic way. In my late 20s and 30s I embraced being single and was able to see a side myself I just loved. I traveled, explored, discovered new things I didn't realize I missed out on in life and for the first time I felt free. Free of peoples expectations or ideals of who I was suppose to be. I made a conscious decision to reflect on who I am and my purpose in life and navigate life with pure intention. Blessings to this lovely couple and doing what works for them.
Her first mistake was cooking only meals that he likes. Marriage is about compromise. Falling in love is a phase that goes away. It lasts 2 to 3 years at most. It prepares you for true love down the road if you stick it out. People who chase romance and divorce the minute they fall out of love will never experience true love. After the passion fades, you see the true heart and soul of a person. If you still like the person after the passion fades, then you have found your soul mate. Hang in there. I wish you the best.
You are so right! All that excitement fades, then you get to the real meat years down the road. Also, marriage is cyclical. Some days you’ll be in love, some not so much. You got to stick it out #almost19years
Beautifully said
My husband & I have
been married for 7 yrs and we live apart, as being a older couple coming into the marriage we each own our house outright. He still has a business so he works 12 hrs a day. I see him a lot during the week but our time together is weekends. We just live 2 miles apart. Another thing we have pets & they don't get along so we keep them apart.
My sister and her husband have been married for about 15 years and they each have their own home. He kept his home when they got married and my sister later bought her own house. When I was younger I thought it was odd, but I’m understanding that it works for them.
Could they just have continued dating without getting married?
@@candacedawn357 Well, there’s a level up of commitment in marriage. They are now in their 60’s and want to show that they are committed to each other.
@@cutenobi Interesting!
I love Tamron, but what kind of question is "so do you consider yourself single??" when she clearly invited them on as a married couple who lives separately? SMH
Yea..u can tell she was having a hard time digesting the concept.
You can love someone with all your heart and not want to see them every day.
I love it. When you are both independent, this is an awesome lifestyle. You will always feel as though you are dating. I AM IN!!!!
My mom and step father does that. They started their marriage that way, as they had 2 households full with their own children
How is that arrangement working out for them?
@@lighteningsnips They've been married for 11 years and they're still together and happily married. They "spend the night" over to each other's homes and see each other every night as they only live several blocks away. They came into the union owning their own homes and with their own kids I think it's a perfect setup as the kids get to stay in their own space and everything is the same. It's fun in my opinion as they get to have daily getaways and have a change of space on a week to week basis.
@@joannejoanne7816 this sounds perfect. Maybe if more people were this realistic there would be less divorces
I plan to do exactly this when I remarry. I have 4 kids and I've lived alone for about 3 yrs.
@@ibiminaabiye257 Same here! I have my own home and kids and I would like someone who has their own space. I've been married before and we all lived under one roof and it was hell on earth.....for EVERYONE involved.
Some rich people have lived like this for years. I don't see anything wrong with this type of arrangement. I think it keeps the marriage fresh.
I'm happy to see that they're happy! Traditional/conservative/conventional marriages and relationships aren't for everyone. Knowing how different people are, it boggles my mind that we expect everyone to fit the same mold. As long as both parties are respectful and it works for them, then leave them be.
Finally people who think the same way I do ! This is what I have been 🗣🗣 shouting from the roof tops ! No desire to marry anyone ! I will have a dedicated partner and so will I be, we can visit each other any time BUT live separately! I love ❤️ my life , space and sanity and self being !
I absolutely love this idea! I was talking with a friend about it just a few days ago and she totally agreed. I am such an independent person, do not like to feel smothered and I realize that I do not want someone in my face 24/7, no matter how much I love them. I think it would keep things exciting. Of course that could change, but for now that is how I feel.
I love this ideal also!! I’ve been married before and if I get married again I can actually do this!!
If you can afford it. I also like the separate room if needed.
I absolutely love this idea, the only thing is this takes two absolute " grown" mature adults that don't use actually use this time to simply cheat on their spouse. The door is literally wide open.
@@FitPasson if someone's inclined to cheat, I don't think living arrangements will get in their way. But yes, whatever people choose both parties need to be open and honest about what they really want
Distance makes the heart grow fonder. This add a little spice in their marriage and it works!
Yes!!!! I love this!!!! Monogamous and committed but not always in each other’s spaces!
This concept seemed like it can work for couples with no children. But when children are in the mix it's a different ball game. I do know at the end of the day companionship and love is what most crave. Kudos to them.
True. I'm wondering how this dynamic would work if the couple had kids
This is so true. Maybe they have no,plans for children. Honestly, I think I& it works for them then ok but it’s only five months in so they are back into the honeymoon phase. It sounds like they don’t know how to compromise. At some point they will have to face those same issues that drove them to live apart.
Currently living married but separately and we have two children. Long story short our kids are happier than ever. Happy parents equals happy children. We both love each other but have different routines, different ways of managing money, different ways of running household duties, etc. It caused too much friction. As is, with small children and working crazy hours we were burnt out. It broke us and we were talking it out on each other. Constant arguments and our children? Suffering. For the sake of staying married and our children's wellness and happiness we chose to live separately. We see each other all the time pretty much every day or every other day. Before we didn't go out much because we were angry at each other and worn out now all the sudden were going out all the time as a family making memories, we laugh more we enjoy more because we don't have tension. When I come to my place after a stressful day of work I release that at my own place. When we meet up I'm refreshed and positive. Our kids are very happy with our new life style the way they look at it is "we have two houses! That is so cool" my son brags about it all the time now lol
My husband and I been married 10 going on 11yrs and we been in a LAT marriage for 3 years and we love it and it work great for us. Yes it’s can be expensive but I don’t think we would ever live together again. We do stay at each other home 3-4 times a week and have full access to each other home. We promise to stay close to each other for the kids and in case of an emergency so our home is about 3-5 min apart from each other.
How does this work with the kids?
I am no longer that person I was when I married. Marriage life can be suffocating especially when children are involved. How can one regain their sense of independence while still being devoted to one’s family?
GOALS! I personally love this! It's the best of both worlds.
What a beautiful couple 💑 . I hope people get the message that YOUR marriage is YOURs. As long as you are happy, respectful, considerate, loyal, mature, and (please) private in making decisions. The only person you need to answer to is each other. I love this!
I think it’s a good arrangement for them. I understand her not wanting to lose herself. Glad this is working out!!
I so agree with their approach & would definitely do this. If finances were tight, the alternative would be get a place big enough so that we can have separate bedroom and our own bathroom. We'd be both responsible for cleaning our own bedroom & bathroom, but have a cleaning rota for the rest of the home aka the communal areas.
That's my plan!
Bingo!!!!!! I've rejected a marriage proposal before because he wanted us to live in a two bed condo. I told him if I did that I would end up hating him immediately. He didn't want to spend his money on a bigger house. Space is the secret ingredient in relationships! That's why men like going out to work.😂😂
Exactly why living apart was necessary to save my marriage. My husband is messy AF I'm OCD. We love each other but not enough to compromise my sanity. It's worked wonders. I have a clean house and now he's learning the hardship of maintaining a house. My anxiety has gone down and he's been more active and is more in top of things.
We have been married 44 years. We started living apart a month ago. I absolutely love it!!!
From a baby boomer perspective .
This sounds heaven. Keeping your independence sll of it. Is sooooo key for ONENESS.
Being a minimalist. I perfer to have less stuff and more peace.
Think about the amount of stress living together it cost
Love this…”union” isn’t just physical. There are so many sad ppl in their driveways dreading going into their homes. Like H.E.R. said “cause I feel alone even when we’re alone.” Who wants to “suffer?!?!?” They’re making it work for them so they can keep the spark. 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
There are many people who are married and live together and go on date nights and don't regret coming home and probably more people dating waiting to break up with someone and very unhappy
You people only like this because it's different.
😆😆😆 A hot dog will holler 🐶
A good relationship needs being together and spending enough time apart from each other. Being together all the time kills the passion and creates stress.
My Uncle snored Soo bad that his wife had to sleep in another room🥴. They stayed married until they took their last breath. Always showing Love to each other and others😊
I would love this type of relationship for myself because sometimes you just need a break from your partner and come back together.
I get what they are saying. They had to separate in order to put the spark back into their marriage. They want to feel the dating chemistry again, but I also sense that in their culture divorce maybe frowned upon. It feels to me that they are doing anything to make their marriage work to avoid backlash from their families. They may genuinely care/love each other but may not be meant to be married.
lol, because they are not living the way you would want them to live?
You are speculating WAAAAY too much. You don't know this couple. STOP
@@Morrocanprincess This video is about two people who made a DECISION to put their PERSONAL LIFE on social media and the Tamron Hall Show for the world to see. I gave my OPINION on the information that was discussed. Simple as that.
I love this and love all the positive comments. We’ve decided after 3 years of marriage, that we’ll be living apart while married. I’m looking forward to it. We too, were very independent individuals prior to getting together.
Look at how she looks at her husband. She's obviously giddy and head over heels with him. This arrangement looks like the best thing that could have happened to them and their marriage, so I support them and wish them all the best.
Wow!! This was quite intriguing. But I found myself smiling a lot while looking at them and listening to their story. I love it! All the best to their journey ❤️.
Lovely couple. this is what you get when parents pressure to have their kids married right after college. they don't get dating time and getting to know each other
As crazy as this sounds…. I could soooo do this.
Problem with being together is, you end up with resentment and the other person feels like they’re being robbed.
I get the SACRIFICE thing, and I believe it’s good to take your eyes off of yourself and focus on helping others but sometimes not everyone is meant to live under the same roof. Sometime two people just don’t get along after 2 days. Better to live separate and date. When you’re tired of hearing all the nonrealistic things the other spouse is talking about and nodding your head to all the excuses…. You can call it a night and just go home. I like it
We have to do what's best for us. Live your life.
I actually like this concept.
I think it’s the independence and having your own space.
Not having someone in my face/space 24/7.😂
I absolutely love this story 💕 Best of luck to you both!
A bigger house with lots of rooms to find privacy and solitude could be a workable environment/solution.
I'm all for it.. my husband and I sleep in different rooms. But we do what works for us
As a Desi person I just loved learning this couples journey! It truly is beautiful that in this day and age that many people are choosing to have relationships that is the perfect shape for them regardless of societal/ cultural norms. May we all live& honor the within truth our souls ✨
Love this. I'm in this situation and can completely relate to her. Giving examples as to why this is beneficial for some couples is hard because you have to live through it to understand it.
I have always wondered why a 'temporary separation' is hardly ever recommended to couples going through a tough season. The show host demonstrates the type of stereotype that even prevents people from thinking this way. This couple may have stumbled on something golden. It is very likely that they would be in a much worse place now if they had continued to live together.
Many people get separated and it doesn't fix anything, sometimes it is recommended in court and even mandated in some states before divorce. Separation doesn't necessarily fix issues. It depends on what the issues are. Like he said, they were looking for excitement and they found it. Not everyone needs that day in and day out.
@@ASmith-jn7kf I had this thought too however by the time a case gets to court it is usually too late. The friction within the relationship would have eaten in too deep. By that time, the separation would do little or no good. The unique thing about this couple is that they didn't wait till things got too sour before they decided on the separation approach.. and it worked like a charm for them..
This probably works so much better for people who are accustomed to living alone (10 years are more) and marry later in life.
Why do they feel like putting their spouses interest ahead of theirs is a bad thing? That is what love does. Love is not selfish. Love looks out for the one loved and this helps the relationship mature.
You should take care of yourself more than you do others so you can care for them. If she felt she was loosing herself, that wasn't healthy and would bring her depression
That's right - agape love!
And we see how traditional marriage is going for everyone, not well.
Love it!!!!! If we think about it. It’s not really a new concept. Think about it Sarah had her own tent.
One of my friends from church and her husband are living in separate houses. It even more special that they have adult children. They both seem to be doing pretty well with it. Your relationship is your relationship. You can do it however you want to do it. You are you. God bless you guys have a great day. A
I looooooves this. Forget what people think. You guys look happy!!! One of my favorite married couples they have a family home and maybe 15 minutes away they have a fully furnished 1 bedroom apartment. When they need time apart or one needs a break from the kids they go there and read, relax, whatever. They call it their best kept secret.
Once you live long enough, you realize you must figure out what works for you versus adhering to what most people do or what others THINK you should do. We spend the first part of life being indoctrinated with society rules and standards. If you're lucky you get to spend the rest of your life removing what doesn't work and implementing what does.
🙏🏼
The main thing that keep a marriage balanced and healthy, "communication" the good and bad. They had the hard and uncomfortable conversations and both realized, we're on the same page with this arrangement. Kudos for them 🎯👏🏾. Do whatever makes your marriage work because there are just two people who matter!!!
If they are happy.....let them live their lives 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙏🏾🙌🏾❤️🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
I love this for both of them. They get to have time to focus on themselves and time to focus on each other without it being mundane and a given... it's almost like living outside of default. 🥰
I love this !
I agree with Sana when you are married sometimes you can lose yourself. When you are always there giving and not getting the same.
Even when your in a relationship it can happen especially with women that decide to live for their man
I’m glad it works for them and that they found happiness in an unconventional way. If you married to someone but have to be distant from each other to find happiness, then you weren’t meant to be with each other so you should stay single until you find the right person. The thing about it is that people afraid to be single so they settle for less and find themselves unhappy. (Their situation is unique because of the culture, pressure and stigma)
That’s not at all what is happening here. I am independent to the point that no matter who I love or how hard I love them I will never want to share a house with someone. That doesn’t mean I married or fell in love with the wrong person. Or that I shouldn’t be allowed to have a happy marriage. It means I want my own space to live in. What’s wrong with that?
10 seconds in and I loved the video I DO get this and love it!!! Whatever the reason living seperately I think saves marriages and nope Ive never been married. But, the older I get I see marriage looking like this! And its "unconventional" based on these crazy rules of society. Create the life YOU want!
They are happy and have found ways to make their marriage work living apart, kudos to them!
This is married, living apart. If it works for your relationship, why not? I agree with doing what works for you.
I say if it works for them then why not so many couples are unhappy and they found a way to make it work for them and if it works for them why not
I would love to have a relationship like that to be married but not have to live with my partner.
I like this. I think this is perhaps the cure for marriage boredom.
This won’t work for me and my husband but glad they found their own workable arrangement. When kids get involved how would that work. I enjoy the married life of being together, cuddling and working things out. Also our kids love having their dad at home. Yes life can get hectic. We both work. I currently work from home but we have arrangement that works for us whilst being in the house. We help each other to ensure the house and kids are looked after and still try to find time for each other. Yes sometimes we are just tired but that is life of being parents and being married. 🤪
Ammarah, if you and your husband got married for more realistically mature reasons then they did. I can see why you feel this wouldn't work. Totally makes sense to me.
Anmarah That’s what marriage is to me. Being able to love beyond the spark. I hope they eventually get to that point.
Separate bedrooms, a multi level home where their bedroom is on a separate floor.
@@user-en1zc5vd6y exactly. Loving someone 24/7 mood 😂😂😂. I like knowing he is next to me. 🤣🤣🤣. Also marriage is about experiencing your other half in all elements. They will find it hard living full time together if kids come into play
@@distorbia20 talk about the MOOD!!!! Lol
But I like the fact that they are trying whatever they can to be happy. many married couples resign themselves to unhappiness coz these kinda ideas seems crazy.
They truly look happy.....i am not mad
I Love this!!!!
This is something I’ve seriously thought about while dating. If I ever get to the point of remarriage I would hope to have the conversation and understanding from my man to agree to this even if it’s short term.
If it works for them then great!!
My husband and I are married 36 years. He worked 14 hours or so a day. I took care of the kids and worked part time when they were in school. The last 7 years he works in SC and I stayed in NC.He visits every other week and we speak many times throughout the day. In a few years he will retire and move back home. It can work but not for everyone. There has to be trust, you can’t be a jealous person and of course, you have to love each other still. ❤️
They love and care about each other to make their marriage work , they're happy and that's all that matters . I get it ,the romance and spark fades over time when you're together all the time ,some space created between you was Soo needed . Happy that this is working for you!
1 house, separate bedrooms. Duplex, separate floors. But two apartments? 🤦🏽♀️
They do live in New York it's expensive
@@nope9905 that's my point. Regardless of where you live, home ownership is better than rent.
@@grannyklampit1710 It's New York and the city at that. Good luck with that. Let people live! It's not our journey it's theirs. Never know what's gonna happen in the end and marriage is hard and boring oh and did I say a bit miserable for most. If they are happy, let them have it.
@@nope9905 (gyah, you're whiny) I absolutely f*cking hate people who act as though a comment is somehow stopping people from doing whatever the hell is that they're doing. I'm not opposed to having separate spaces in a marriage. But, to me, two separate apartments on the opposite sides of town seems impractical. That's my perspective which I am entitled to have and it has zero effect on the strangers being interviewed. If you don't like it, GET over it and move on. You're exhausting. Go away. Deal with your many issues. Keep your negativity about marriage to your lonesome self. Bye.
I've been saying this for some time, I honestly understand it. I do think you should try living together first so you feel the difference and appreciate it more. I like this and it works if both ppl can he trusted and are committed to the relationship.
I’ve always said that i need my own home when I’m married. I believe everyone needs their own space/ in whatever form that is. I’m a lil complex so it’s not for everyone. 🗣i love you but gimmie my space….at times.
My relationship was way stronger and healthier when my boyfriend and I lived apart. But ever since he moved in last July we fight all the time he sleeps in the different bedroom.. We never have date night the highlight of my day is to see him and I get to cook dinner for him…. Even when he gets off at midnight. As result I’ve put on a lot of weight. I wish we could afford to live apart but my rent just increased $750 a month so now I really need him as a roommate.
Well I guess they said no need to fake it rather than divorce this situation works for them. I believe once they get to where they going in there career they will be in the same house. They seem happy to me.When you don't see each other when you do you spice it up. I'm all for it.
While this may seem unusual, My partner and I and I that live together have been experiencing a similar scenario. Our couples counselor recommended living separately while we try to repair ourselves and the relationship. We haven't decided yet what we're going to do … While it would be In uncomfortable situation it's not worse than us breaking up.
I’m so impressed with the love in these comments. I’m a stepparent and honestly this may have saved us but oh well.
Where I'm from alot of couples are involuntarily separated by work. They only see each other once a month or so. I've always found it sad butt after watching these two maybe it isn't so bad.
My soon to be husbae/ fiancé is a truck driver… I love the time apart bc when we’re together it is a relief for him to rest and just be taken care of and I love taking care of him… when he’s on the road I get extra me time, gym time etc without feeling like I’m leaving him… it’s wonderful.
I think this is absolutely beautiful! ❤️ This is not a strange arrangement for me because I've always said I wanted to live in separate houses when I get married. I just felt like it would keep things between us fresh and new. Unfortunately I also thought this way for selfish reasons as well. Now, I'm on the fence about it. Seeing this couple definitely has me to keep an open mind about this type of arrangement though. I'm with them, if it's working for them...so be it. Everything is not for every person but it clearly works for them. I love it!! ❤️
I have a coworker like that. She lives in the States and her husband lives in Canada and they get along just great and visit each other often.