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Thank you @MedCircle so much for this video!! Please forgive typos etc but if I stop to check this I'll never post it. My mother was my abuser. She was diagnosed with Narcissistic Personality Disorder when I was 12 although I had no clue then or for many years to follow what that was. After my grandmother died when I was 13 I found myself as her personal slave, cook and housekeeper while she systematically abused me. She would also fake illness herself but never to the extent where it actually harmed her. As a child, I spent all my time going in and out of a variety of hospitals and seeing different doctors, as you say she would avoid anyone who asked difficult questions, calling them "incompetent", "stupid" or "a waste of time". Life, for me, was an endless round of tests, often nasty invasive ones, "accidents", surgeries (that were not necessary) and medication that I did not need. She would also force-feed me with a glupey, salty and very unpleasant solution she made herself - I don't know to this day what was in it but know that it contained lots of salt and laxatives. She also used to make me eat vile, rotting food and when in hospital made me "sweets" that I now suspect contained similar substances to the "glupe". At the age of 11, I had a kidney removed (she created merry hell with the doctors to do this - I remember all the rows) only for the pathology to come back as NAD (nothing abnormal detected...) I've also lost 2 feet of my bowel thanks to her "enemas" and laxative fixation. This had to be removed when I was 19 due to it be necrosed and now, 43 years later I'm facing a colostomy... I've also had really bad health otherwise, 2 primary cancers and other auto-immune issues. I could go on... When she died I felt exhilarated, free... It was incredible but after living for so long at her beck and call I kind of imploded and unravelled some 4 years after her death. After a year or so of becoming more and more unwell I eventually sought therapy (because it was either that or end it all) and was lucky enough to see a remarkable team who took their time assessing me then diagnosed me with C/PTSD and an eating disorder (ARFID). Thanks to them I'm in a much better place now although fighting a recurrence of the breast cancer I had 18 years ago. By the way, when I was diagnosed with that (grade 4) breast cancer, her reaction was staggering. I remember it as if it was yesterday. When I explained that, at 42, I had a real fight on my hands to live through this and would need surgery followed by aggressive and extensive treatment her first and only reaction was "WELL!! That's all very fine and good but tell me one thing!! Just *WHO* do you suppose is going to look after *ME* *I* need *you* to do that, not for you to have a year off flaked out in some bed somewhere. You are always *so* inconsiderate...!!" There wasn't really anything to say to that. This is obviously a brief and very-highly condensed version of events that spanned 54 years of my life. Mother had now been dead for 8 years - she died on my 54th birthday after repeatedly telling me she hoped she would "die on a day I'd never forget..." She very much enjoyed any and all attention, the good, the bad and ugly... As you say, her attention-seeking wasn't for money or anything other than that though, the attention was *everything* to her. My own GP was also hers and has said that after requesting my medical records and doing some reading and investigations on my many hospital admissions she is *convinced* mother had Munchausen's by Proxy, I used to feel so cheated of the life I could have had but therapy helped so much with that as did the EMDR I had, which helped enormously with the effects of C/PTSD.
I like to hear more about co-occurring disorders with manchaussen. My mom is extremely narcissistic and borderline too having manchaussen. She always was laying trap for my father by pretending to be sick. She has done Uterus removed, appendicitis removed, gallbladder removed, eye cataract surgery. She wanted more saying she may have hernia, cyst in ovary. No doctor diagnosed her with Asthma while she was mentioning to everyone that she has asthma. she carefully observes the symptoms of what people with real illness experience and start telling she has the same. I often saw her feeding my toddler brother with Vicks vaporub oinment. I raised it as an alarm to my father when I was 8, my father knew and was not doing anything which traumatised me more than what my mom was doing.
@@tamikog7645 I realized quite early on that she wasn't telling the truth but I true it was still traumatizing because I wondered about her intention being telling us that. That and other things.
... this can be extremely serious ... my son dated a girl who’s mother convinced her from an early age that she had a heart condition, and would dote on her constantly ... but in fact was wanting to gain attention for herself ... eventually, after high school, the girl joined the air force to gain distance from her mother ... and obviously, if she had a heart condition she would not have passed the physicals ...
William Norman ... you don’t know the whole story and what she put her daughter through ... it would qualify because for one thing she had her on medications that she didn’t need and caused side effects ...
My mom claimed I had ADHD to explain my behavior to my teachers....but it was just deflecting questions of abuse probably. Can't imagine if she had Munchausen by proxy disorder for real 🙊🙊🙊
My mother told me from a young age, I was brain damaged, molested by my father and I have stress induced a amnesia. A child with bad genes. As her only daughter she wanted to make sure I never overthrow her alpha female status. I’m now 25 and realised I have no medical records on this. I am really struggling with my life cause I am know clueless of who I am. Thank you for this information
Hi I'm Kasey, my childhood life we both have suffered this disease at the hands of our very own mother..I have an 8year old daughter and I never have done to her the way I was growing up. The cycle breaks with me!! I just wish back then someone could have saved me..
there's a Netflix movie about something similar, a mother doing something like that to her only daughter, but has a plot twist. It's called Run, directed by Aneesh Chaganty I'm sorry you had to go through all that, I hope you are better now, a year after you commented, and I hope you can overcome it all and have a very bright and happy life, you deserve it.
My mom had munchausen by proxy. I was diagnosed as high functioning aspbergers, and she would tell me i had no depth perception and made me go to physical therapy for low muscle tone. Ive since gone no contact and have been rediagnosed as neurotypical, and i have been working as a dishwasher/prep cook for years, someone with low muscle tone could never physically be capable of. I should note that if you actually have aspbergers or autism you are amazing and beautiful people ❤
Autism is actually the new category for all encompassing. It is just levels of functioning within the diagnoses. My son was officially diagnosed until 17. We knew he had something and received services, but the things found in autism are also seen in my husband, myself and other family members, we never thought about it. We still pushed him to be independent and overcome obstacles, as a parent is supposed to do, so to do. I have worked with those with special needs and also autism even before having kids and still did not see it. But the school did not either. It took hours of testing to get the right one when he was finally able to answer questions himself on tests.
@@tamaravanvoorst448 it sounds like youre doing a good job. i know many people with autism and i don't relate to them, but i do relate to people with classic adhd symptoms. i feel like i have undiagnosed adhd. my parents wanted me to stay "their little girl" forever and never develop at the same time claiming they wanted to cure me and wanted me to overcome my disability that i didn't have. i wanted to be independent but they did everything in their power to keep me from achieving that goal.
@@phoeberaymond8781 actually ADHD is his secondary diagnosis. His older brother has it well. He has depression and anxiety from me..I have bipolar disorder and other issues..some biological and others from trauma. He was told to apply for disability, but he wanted to work. We went that route to get services he might need, housing, and be able to work less if need be. Basically because I had not taken him to a doctor other than for routine medical things, had made sure he could do things like Cook for himself, go to school on his own (got ready on his own as my husband nor myself were at home and his brother graduated before he did), and other things, he was not disabled enough. Other agencies waiting for at least the disability medicaid for things did not understand it. But the place that tested him, still let him pick a place to help him get a job. He got one..only took awhile because although he finished 6 months, he could not graduate until the rest of the class did. The job required at least a high school diploma. He only lives with us because it is more like a roommate situation. He just contributes to the bills like everyone else and rest is for whatever he wants to do with it. He has his own car. He just has to get more driving hours in to get his license. So he has public transportation taken him back n forth to work.
I'm autistic * and felt nice when I read the last part 💛 thank you (* autism 1, formerly known as Asperger syndrome, still diagnosed as Aspergers in some countries)
Munchausens or covert narcissism? My ex would CONSTANTLY fake mental illness in order to gain sympathy and attention, to the point where I wondered if he had Munchausens (I only stayed a few months, as soon as I worked out what he was - I was gone). Always the victim, nothing was ever his fault - and if he was backed into a corner, or forced to confront his shitty behaviour, his "symptoms" would suddenly "resurface", so he could hide behind it and hence avoid having to take any kind of responsibility for his own life. He spent hours on his phone "researching" mental disorders of all kinds, and if he found a new one - hey presto, he had a new set of "symptoms". Very troubled/dangerous individuals either way...
OMG, my ex-husband is always "sick" and gets dizzy when we are out shopping together. He all of sudden doesn't feel good whenever someone is talking with me. He is never at fault,, either, and he is always too sick to discuss any topic having to do with his being sick. Even after running to the doctor all the time the doctor told him he couldn't find anything wrong. He is exhausting to be around.
My covert narc husband constantly creates drama for attention and pitty. He also has claimed to have a heart condition for over 20 years but doesn’t go to the doctor for it
@@kuunami he would try to get whatever he could from whoever he could manipulate. I started to notice him almost constantly "borrowing" money from various family members to spend on beer (often after blowing through his benefits in a matter of hours), and he would certainly use whatever he could play on to keep the cycle going. Alcohol/attention/money/drugs are his gods, and I just hope he gets the message and I never hear from or see him again...
omg... would you be comfortable to share some more? Like, was your mom diagnosed or is that your suspicion? With my mom it's not only the weekly 'i feel sick, i have a sore throat' but i noticed she also copies my sicknesses...? Like one day i had a very strong migrane and then the next day (when i was already feeling better) my mother told me she had a very strong headache, stayed mostly in bed, talked very weakly and was happy i brought her tea and stuff... There are countless other examples, this was just the most recent one.
@@KitStupido just seeing this comment 2 years later loool. Anyway, I know she's lying because I've taken her to lots of doctors appointments and I've been in the room with her when doctors give her her diagnosis, and then I'll be with her at another doctors visit and I watch her lie about what the last doctor said. I've also seen her devolve into a child when she is able to convince others that she's ill and they take care of her like a little kid.
This is more common than the "rare illness" that is mentioned. Every hospital has frequent flyers. They are not all drug seeking or wanting financial benefit. They need the attention and this is the only way they know how.
I have a former friend with this and she checks all the boxes. She’s a master manipulator. The sad thing is, she’s only gotten worse not better. This video is spot on.
Or people not being diagnosed with the proper disorder or physical illness until A. It's too late B. They've been on other meds that didn't help the actual problem This is unrelated to Munchausen By proxy
My mother was ALWAYS sick! There wasn’t a single week during my whole life in which she didn’t have something going on, yet she was so strong to the point of being scary! When I was yet to turn 3, one of my first memories is my own mother telling me that ‘If she died, it would be my fault’; that was after playing dead until I started crying ‘cause I thought she was gone and I would be left alone! I stopped talking to her a few years ago and I don’t know why I didn’t do it earlier. Nothing can undo what she did to me…
My sister most definitely has munchousen!!! She was molested by my brothers, we were neglected by our parents, she's a Registered nurse, her kids were always sick, asthma, seizures etc. and now that they're grown, she has now made herself sick... Shock treatments, depression, Lymes disease, fibromyalgia, had 2/3 Of her colon removed, seizures, scoliosis, warfarin, several P.E.'s, she goes to I.U. and U. Of Louisville to see different doctors, chronic compression fracture... Meaning she fractured her back years ago and didn't know it and on and on it goes. Our eldest brother is the most evil, sick twisted, and she still talks with him. My family is the house of the millionaire narcissistic liars & manipulating, controling demonics! I have went no contact with these abusers!
People with BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) will sometimes pretend to have chronic or terminal illnesses if they believe someone they consider a "favorite person" is about to abandon them. I've also known an adult with BPD who did a kind of doctor-shopping until she could find someone who would give her a full hysterectomy at age 40 (she had no children & it's very difficult to find an ObGyn who will do this in case the female changes her mind that she wants to have children). This female was blaming her vacillating emotions and mood swings on her BPD. She eventually found a surgeon who would do a complete hysterectomy (at age 42, I believe?) and guess what...it changed nothing because it was (and still is) the underlying Cluster B personality disorder that is the root problem and what drives her to behave in such an extreme and rapidly fluctuating manner. This female with BPD did not want attention...what she wanted was to avoid (perceived) abandonment by the people she considered important to her. Munchausen and Munchausen by proxy seem to be more about A) histrionics...getting attention (even negative attention as long as they keep receiving it) and garnering sympathy from others) or possibly... B) narcissism...being admired by others for being a devoted and selfless caregiver (i.e. garnering statements from other IRL and on social media such as "you're an incredible and loving mother and so strong and selfless"). People with NPD are entirely about seeking admiration (even in such a twisted manner as this...narcissists will do ANYTHING to get admiration from others, even if it means sacrificing their own child). People with BPD are simply trying to avoid abandonment when they pretend to be terminally ill or chronically ill (they're like toddlers hoping to elicit a caregiving response in those around them).
Good thing i havent done that...😬☹😰 but my question is why would they need to have a fake diagnosis to get the FP to stay? As proof they need their help to keep them stable or help them take care of them? Would really love to hear from the woman for her POV...
I think a tv serie called "Sharp Objects" talks about Munchausen syndrome by proxy too. I always wondered what illness was associated with one of the characters and I think it can be this one
My wife has this. She goes to Drs for EVERYTHING, never follows through so she never 'heals' then go to a different Dr to do the same. Other parts of this sickness are ripping this family, our 2 yr old beautiful baby girl, and myself, apart. She RAGES out like a toddler having a tantrum. She runs to friends, her Family, my family, and spill so many hurtful lies and I'm used as the crashpad, makes me sound like an otherworldly creature and nothing could be further from the truth. She practically ignores this baby, she cries for her attention and it breaks my heart as I have to pick up the pieces. No idea how to fix this 💔
Save the kid. That kind of behavior will scramble a child's brains like an egg. You don't want your kid to end up like me: a codependent chump who feels guilt at ever saying "no" and pays thousands in therapy just to keep breathing. Please please protect your kid.❤
A friend used to joke that I had Munchausen by proxy in regards to my two dogs. I loved them so much and worried constantly about their health and well-being. I’ll admit that I was a bit neurotic but being vigilant paid off. I just sensed that something was not right. They both had cancer, though different types and at different times. The vet at first thought I was crazy but eventually learned to appreciate and trust my instincts. We were able to get them treatment which extended their lives. Sometimes you have to be a persistent pain in the rear. It was in no way about getting attention.
My mom was falsely accused when I was a child because I would lose my breath while I was sleeping as a child. It turned out I had a birth defect there was a piece of skin covering my nose and part of my mouth when they took out my tonsils and adenoids. I found out later I have mosaic down Syndrome which may be why I had so many health problems the lady is right when she says you can't just throw the diagnosis around but sadly it does happen. They also miss cases too I know either way it's sad all the way around.
I think my best friends postpartum depression has manifested into this. She or her child (age 3 now) are always either “sick”, at the emergency room, or in some type of therapy or treatment. She’s been to the emergency room for so many things and just keeps doctor shopping. An example of one little thing is- she has a pine nut allergy- but gives herself, her kid, even the dog Benedryl. It’s so weird how manic she gets about things. Last time I talked to her she said she’d had like 16 EKG’s in a month because she’s convinced she has heart issues. It’s hard to watch happen. I wish I knew how to help.
If you believe that this is what's happening to your friend and she's doing it to her child call cys right away. You can report suspected abuse and they will look into it.
I too have a friend like this. I am keeping a close eye on her to make sure she doesn't over do it but she is constantly getting very manic about medical things. I have a nursing background from the past so I know she is full of it on many of her issues but I know she is a good person. She freaks out anytime you mention it to her. I don't know how to help her. She has many doctors who have accused her of it but once they almost killed her son when they ignored her and her son's appendix had burst. Luckily they saved him but she had tried to tell them and they did not believe her. It gets confusing because she does get manic sometimes.
This was very helpful. I've long suspected my mother has this, with a personality disorder as well. She's caused untold damage over the years to our family.
I’m pretty sure Munchausen by proxy is the case with the little girl in “The Sixth Sense” played by Mischa Barton, who as a ghost reached out to Haley Joel Osment’s character and showed him the video of her mom poisoning her.
I've been in a number of psych wards throughout my years. I've seen a few people in there just for the attention. Their symptoms would suddenly kick in when they thought someone was watching them and told lies about anyone who would call them out. They were annoying, but i wasn't in there to focus on them. I would just avoid them when I noticed them.
I had a close friend at school who constantly lied about pregnancies and miscarriages , and other medical conditions I kind of felt sorry for her so i just ignored it all really She also lied about all sorts of things I knew it was some form of mental illness Until i got very sick myself with a neurological condition and my deep deep grief over my health I was 30 Immediately she told me she had MS She started this latest BS abouth the condition and i blew. She had no idea what its like when you have a lifelong condition and you can kiss goodbye to your health Ive not bothered with her since Im no longer angry , but i could not ever listen to her stories again I do have compassion for her I just try and cope with my situation as best i can without people creating drama Its such a hard condition to treat
I never heard of this disease until now. But I have always been suspicious of people who bring up their sickness out of nowhere and seek sympathy instead of trying to fight through this suspicious disease that somehow doesn't show symptoms. Usually the person brings it up as an excuse for not completing a job or refusing to do a job. Or when you're discussing about someone who's sick but this person decides to steer the conversation to his/her own sickness.
I have a family member that has this. I even witness this person throw themself down the stairs then claiming it was weakness that caused it. This person is always ill, new diagnosis but wont follow through with treatment. Even mental health care is flighty. She won't keep to her appointments or remain in medication... it's very toxic and I've had to put up some massive boundaries. I sadly can't be around this person very much. It's so draining.
My mother used to run me to the dr all the time when I was young - even a 'faith healer' for a couple of years because there was 'something wrong with her' . I think this behaviour helped fuel her Covert Narcissistic personality and rationalize the abuse she dished out at home when others weren't around . But look at what an exceptional mother she was .
I know someone that is always coming up with new illness, mental, health, what ever he can get attention for. He snowballs doctors and online therapists into believing all his different bs. It's crazy
Since 16 years I was reporting to doctors that I feel weak. They made me blood tests which were ok so they were telling me that I’m healthy or I’m looking for attention or am some hypochondriac. Finally my symptoms stated to grow up. There were also new ones. Around one month ago eventually tomography showed up that I had some area of my brain changed in way which accurately explains my symptoms and that they were all those years true but I was on my own without medical support. No one took me serious until last year. Doctors were scared what illnesses is it. Time was going on. They couldn’t write in papers that i should rest nor treat my condition because they didn’t know what is it.This is f*cking cruel. Additionally I’m children from dysfunctional/narcissistic family and I was in serious trouble all those years.
My husband's mother had this - everyone knew, but nothing was ever done about it to my knowlege. My husband's brother was born with only one kidney which was infected so he nearly died - that's what i was told so i don't know how true that is - but as a result she became obsessed with his health (even though he was healthier than me!) & she took great delight in having to take him to the doctor for the slightest thing, or, joy of joys, to the hospital. My doctor was horrified when i told her i was getting married because she thought i was marrying him insteadnof his brother - she said, "Oh god, not him? You do know his mother brings him down here nearly every day over the slightest thing?!" I reasured her it wasn't him i was marrying but his brother. She said, "well buckle the seat belt & be prepared for a bummpy ride". The mother never let this son have a life of his own, was still bathing him in his teens & 20s, & even sleeping with him - because she said he missed his brother when we got married as they used to share a room (with beds pushed right together which was creepy & not because of lack of space). She would make up illnesses for him which he believed & she would have 'funny turns', dizzy spells or if all else failed turn on the tears if he so much as wanted to go out sonewhere with even a male friend later in life. I was told by other members of the family that she soon put a stop to any female contact. There were huge rows in the family when he passed his driving test & wanted to get a car - because it meant another step towards independance which she coukdn't tolerate. My husband said she started when they were very young making them believe that she was the only woman they needed in life & that if his brother hadn't come along with his one kidney he would probably gone the same way but because she turned all her attention on his brother he had at least some freedom to go out with friends, although she never liked him having girlfriends either. It quickly became apparent that she really didn't like me, & that dislike grew when she realised i could see right through her ridiculous antics & wouldn't conform to her crazy ideas. She was a very controlling covert narcissist who would have tantrums or turn on the silent treatment & withdraw when the three men in her life (weak enabler husband & 2 conforming sons) went against her, which could be as trifling as wearing a different shirt to the one she'd laid out - she chose their clothes every day (i married my husband when he was 29 & he was still afraid of putting on something other than what she'd put ready for hiim). Then, one day, all became clear when my husband's father said that i was on to a loser before i'd even started because not only did i come along & take her 'little boy' away from her but i went on to have the daughter she'd always wanted & which she blamed him for not giving her, & that ahe'd punished him by not sleeping with him since the birth of their second son. This was said when she wasn't present, but he of course denied saying it when i told her what he'd said some years later when she got into an argument with me (so if he didn't tell me, how did i know this information?!) My husband's brother never got married - the mother yelled at me, "he's been too ill to get married", & he then yelled the same thing at me, "i've been too ill to get married". She yelled, "we've got bad legs", hitching up her skirt & showing me her knees which looked ok to me but who am i to judge?! He then yelled the same, hitchiing up his trouser legs, "i've got bad legs"! Gee, it would've been hilarious if it hadn't been so sad. He stayed with her until the day she died so her control to make him never leave her paid off because she was always afraid of being abandoned, esp when her husband died, &, sadly, he is now quite apparently a narcissist like her. I pity the woman who may ever become involved with him now he's 'free', but he would probably choose someone either like his weak father eho conforms to his every wish, or like his narcissistic mother because he likes to be 'cared for' in the same way she 'cared' for him. It seems there is no justice in this world, so i hope there is in the next, if there is one.
I think my colleague has Munchausen. As the weeks and months has gone by I’ve noticed she’s absolutely obsessed with illnesses and that’s literally all she talks about, every day. She’s constantly talking about aches and pains. She pretty much has every illness under the sun. Something is always “wrong”. Yesterday it was back pain, today it was a UTI, last week it was a collapsed lung. It just never ends. If she doesn’t have something that’s bothering her right now, she talks about when she was hospitalized with something else - and she talks about it like it’s some sort of a badge of honor. I’ve also noticed she talks about nothing ELSE but illness. She has zero interest in anything else. Never talks about maybe having enjoyed a good movie or book or anything at all. Only illness. I’ve started ignoring her every time she tries to bring up another illness or pain. She’s mad at me for that, but I very much enjoy the silence 🤭
I had a brain tumour as a child which is all healed now, but I believe it caused similar symptoms to the ones you described. I don't think I try to pass myself off as being mentally unwell or try to cause it, but I'm almost compelled to act weak or incapable around those I perceive as "grown up" though I myself am an adult. This is especially prevalent with my mum, I notice that I infantilise myself around her because I want her to look after me like when I was in hospital.
Maybe you still seek love from your mother because you didn’t receive it when you were little. Therefore it’s difficult to not act like that around her. You can look into CPTSD if you are still struggling with these reactions around her.
this is what happened to me :( im afraid to tell my family because now my family thinks im just mentally ill and Christmas is always hard bc I don’t want to tell my family this because I love them, but I’ve been ostracized because they all think I’m just crazy now
_Oh no, the consequences of my own actions!_ According to this video, it's not that your family "thinks" you're mentally ill, Munchausen is, in fact, a mental disorder. Look on the bright side: you can finally get that attention you crave from a psychologist and it won't be another one of your lies!
I learned about Munchausen/Factitious Disorder last year and realized it was what my ex bf had. He claimed that he had stage 3 lung cancer developing into stage 4, as well as brain tumor that was causing him occasional visual hallucination. He wanted me to stay over night at his place in case he stops breathing during his sleep. Often he acted as if he stopped breathing and lost consciousness. He generally lied about many things along w his medical conditions for about a yr we were together. As I found him suspicious after a few months and tried to leave him, he started threatening me and stalking me. But the real reason why I couldn't leave him was because of the question ringing in my head, "what if he's actually sick?" If I knew about Manchausen back then, I'd have taken a different action. And it became one of the reasons why I started studying psychology.
I’m someone who has seizures and bad acid reflux and I seriously despise people who fake illnesses. I knew one person whose mom faked colon cancer for 11 years to cover up her drug habit and I believe that is Manchausen. After 11 years of faking, she told her dad that her mom was faking and they got divorced and the mom was left homeless. It’s a screwed up story.
I like to hear more about co-occurring disorders with manchaussen. My mom is extremely narcissistic and borderline too having manchaussen. She always was laying trap for my father by pretending to be sick. She has done Uterus removed, appendicitis removed, gallbladder removed, eye cataract surgery. She wanted more saying she may have hernia, cyst in ovary. No doctor diagnosed her with Asthma while she was mentioning to everyone that she has asthma. she carefully observes the symptoms of what people with real illness experience and start telling she has the same. I often saw her feeding my toddler brother with Vicks vaporub oinment. I raised it as an alarm to my father when I was 8, my father knew and was not doing anything which traumatised me more than what my mom was doing.
Seems more like NPD though...it's usually something to get people to feel sorry for them or pity them. Other times it's for positive attention like getting gifts or people caring for them. I know several people like that.
Had an ex like that. Was something different every few weeks, a long list of mental disorders that he looked up on the Internet. Some new ones came up every now and again, it was just becoming ridiculous. And I noticed a pattern, his "symptoms" would ease off a bit, then as soon as there was something taking attention away from him, he was suddenly in the throes of "serious mental illness". He was also controlling, jealous of anything I did outside of his vicinity and used to gaslight constantly, to the point where I was a complete basket case. I recently realised that he was a covert narcissist, and was faking everything to gain sympathy and attention - I got out of there as quickly as I could, just as well I had only known him a few months, as it could have been far worse...
I have this (munchausen syndrome), the reason why? Is because I have narcissistic neglectful parents, I was born premature with cerebral palsy, and I always thought of the hospital/clinic to be my safe haven, to get away from my parents, also at the hospital I see other people who struggle with a disability, and it gives me a feeling of reliability, and knowing I'm not alone, also since I had neglectful caretakers, I enjoyed when doctors gave me attention. I also suffered from early childhood sexual trauma, along with verbal abuse, which resulted in chronic pain, and my parents didn't believe me that my trauma was real. Which confusesd me, and made me question myself. Despite knowing 100% that was real. In reality I wanted to be really loved and appreciated, now that I'm older, and found a person who loves me and I love them, I rarely fake completely. I just like to say, people who tend to have this, have trauma, (from other people experiences and mine). I would just like to say I went to therapy, and I realize my intentions weren't so great, and I'm much better now ❤️
@DeadSunsetRises that's great news, mental illnesses are like programs, the sooner you find flaws in the program, the more realization and help you get it. Trust me it's works. I also hope you have a safe journey of recovering.
Dear MedCircle, have you ever known of any doctors exhibiting Munchausens by Proxy via their patients? My doctor diagnosed me with Ankylosing Spondylitis (AS) in my early 30s when I reported lower back pain, regardless of telling him I had hurt my back moving a large TV a few months earlier. He referred me to a specialist who took one look at an X-ray and confirmed the diagnosis without ever examining me. I spent the better part of my 30s taking powerful anti-inflammatories and fearing life with a fully fused spine. I questioned the diagnosis on multiple visits as my back didn’t seem to be getting worse. Eventually, an osteopath I was seeing insisted I way too flexible and couldn’t have AS. She referred me to a sports-medicine doctor in her clinic who ordered a CAT scan of my spine and there was no sign of the disease. When I told my GP, he was smug and almost appeared to be offended that I questioned his diagnosis. I’ve never heard of an AS remission, and if it was possible you would think he’d be elated. In this case, it was almost as though he wanted to brag about having a patient with the disease.
Believe my mother in law has a mild case of Munchausen. She has Dependent Personality Disorder and when she is forced to be alone, she comes up with these strange illnesses, she will complain of being dizzy or stomach pain and the list goes on. And when she is "ill" she will call about 4-5 people complaining to them about her illness, but when her son (my husband) tells her, "if it's that bad go to the emergency room" she scoffs at him and says, "just for that?" She's not wanting help, she's wanting attention. Magically her illnesses never appeared when she lived temporarily with her sister because she got the attention on a constant daily basis. She will be living on her own for the first time in her life since her spouse died (she's in her 70's), and we're afraid this is going to happen constantly. She has rec'd a clean bill of health from her doctor. She also loves to be the bearer of bad news: "so and so is sick" or "so and so has died" in every single conversation. Dealing with someone with any type of attention-seeking disorder is frustrating and exhausting to say the least.
So happy that there's a video on this there's not a lot of information on factitious disorder or Munchausen. As a child my mom took me to all kinds of doctors and would tell people that I would be in a wheelchair by the time I was 30. Then the tables turned as I got to be 14 and was kicked out to start my adult life on my own. And I thank God for it! My parents are not healthy people. And guess what I wasn't in a wheelchair at 30 I'm 48 and still not in a wheelchair. Whenever somebody gets sick or has a medical issue that puts them in the hospital my mom also gets sick or injured calling everyone in the family to seek attention for her illness / injury. I am a violent crime Survivor with severe spinal cord damage. I was diagnosed with PTSD so my mom said that she was diagnosed with PTSD. I had neuropathy due to 8 herniated discs in my spine. And had 4 spinal fusion and decompression surgeries. So my mom said she went to the doctor and got diagnosed with neuropathy too. When I asked her what's causing the neuropathy? She said she doesn't know. I believe she does this to Discount my pain and struggle during my recovery. I spent a year in bed and had to learn to walk again and my family or mother was no part of my recovery in any way. My sister had varicose veins within a half an hour she was calling me telling me she has varicose veins. I would definitely describe my mom is a covert narcissist or borderline. She's jealous and passive aggressive. But instead of threatening suicide she fakes illnesses or has accidents to get its attention from other members of the family. She fakes many illnesses and health issues. She's a retired RN so she knows how to manipulate the system. My sister mentioned she was a retired RN in the hospital during one of her procedures and she got mad at her saying I don't want them to know. My brother was dying in the ICU. instead of being concerned my mom was so jealous that people didn't stop by and see her too. She went to go visit him and said he was being mean/ abusive to her. Because she was complaining about her knee issues and he told her to go get some medical marijuana...lol I said he was in the ICU on a lot of medication after being in a coma for two days. When people don't feel good they're not super nice or happy to see you. I don't think it was necessarily a good place for her to bring up her health issues to somebody who just got out of a coma. After that me and my sister knew she was going to slip trip or fall to try to get more attention. And she did. Now after reading one of the comments they mentioned something about people not believing you when you have real s*** going on. I absolutely know what that's like!! Because a lot of people look at me and don't think that I have spinal cord injury. I have all kinds of neurological issues affecting me from the waist down and both of my arms. And they wouldn't know unless I took off my shirt to see my scar's. But I also don't wear it like a badge of honor or present it as part of my personality for everybody to know. I am so much more than what has happened to me or my physical limitations. And I'm also responsible for working on healing every day! In fact I usually don't like to discuss it because it brings up issues related to trauma for me. People usually innocently ask about the knife mark across my throat. And sometimes people get traumatized by me just describing what happened. It's a long story and not everybody is worth telling it to. So I really don't care what people think when I use the riding cart around the store or when they get behind me and I'm walking slow...lol But I don't seek validation from other people. And I don't need other people to believe me for it to be real.
Unfortunately doctors spent years accusing my mother of Munchausen by proxy. If they’d listened to either us I might not be disabled now. Doctors need to be so careful before saying a patient is lying just because they don’t know how to treat or are unsure in some way.
My mil does this solely for attention. She is a total narcissist, she does it all the time! EVERY gathering with all the family she thinks should be about her and if it’s not, she will find a way to fall, make herself fall, or fabricate an illness so she’d need a to go to the er, Then my fil has to foot the bill for her actions. It is so horrible. They were here in town and I saw it coming, the morning they were supposed to leave my husband and I got up for work, a couple hours later I got a text from my husband saying she fell. I texted omg is she at the hospital?? He said no she just fell in their hotel room between the wall and the bed, and she’s fine. I asked my husband later if she was ok why did he text you and tell you she fell, my husband said idk because she wasn’t hurt but she wanted us all to know she fell. Ugh!! This drives me nuts. She is so crazy!!
I have the exact same scenario with my mil. I can't stand her but I fake liking her not to cause problems. She's a controlling bitch with all her endless ankle sores.
Brutus Pounder That’s called malingering. Malingering is when you fake a health issue deliberately in order to gain some material benefit, such as money.
Wouldn't this disorder be considered manipulation since the individual is aware that they don't have the illness they're trying act out? I have a suspicion that this sort of experience of faking illnesses might be common among Psychopathic and Narcissistic individuals? The Psychopath would fake an illness just for the entertainment of manipulating a therapist, while the Narcissist would obviously seek the attention and sympathy?
I was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder twenty years ago, did ten years of weekly therapy and now I feel better. I have an impulsive behaviour and suicidal tendencies. I wish to get cancer, I crave the attention a serious illness would bring. I believe i wouldn't be able to fake the symptons, I wish to have cancer for real. To many of you who are reading this right now might think I'm cuckoo, and I don't know if you are right. God, it's so good to tell other people how I feel, even if it is in a TH-cam page. Thanx for reading...
You just described Roula Pispirigkou, a Greek mother who's suspected of killing her three little girls, it's shocking, she did all of the things you described (Munchausen by Proxy).
I have a few medical ailments, there’s been people getting my symptoms, I never understood why and thought I was infectious through a spinal injury. Made no sense. When I’ve been at the hospital, and a pain /injury symptom episode came up, three other people would share the same episode and exaggerate it, which made it seem like all issues had the same symptoms This BS really affects the decisions of healthcare professionals, so please try to respect when there’s a wish to be respected Discomfort can lead to irrelevant speech by the patient when thy try to get their problem treated. Thank you for the insight, and dr Mike’s forwarding
my mother threatened me and gaslighted me to make me fake dyslexia and aspergers as a child. I just pretended I couldn't do whatever teachers and psychologists told me to do, and that was the diagnosis they came up with. Disturbing how easy it was to fake it
My sister did that to her son. Now she gets domiciliary care allowance for "caring" for a disabled child. She also pretended he had dangerous nut allergies. She posted an article on fb with a picture of a young man had a peanut allergy and the headine said "I can never kiss a girl because it could kill me". There's nothing wrong with him except that he has a narcissist mother.
Could this explain the trend in young people who live out mental illness or even common diagnosis like asthma as an indentity? It’s like they glorify disability.
I like the comment that said everyone in society is faking a mental illness. I think it's the Doctor's some aren't good people they lie too and get their doctors friends to help them out and it's crazy because it's just a job to them but this is people real life they are playing with.
This sounds like my sister. Can a kid learn it from their parent? Because my mother was like this. She'd make up illnesses to get attention and then magically they would disappear. And these were serious illnesses she said she had.
If a child can learn something like this from her parents? A big YES. Our parents are what initially shapes our perception of what is reality and how it works.
I don't think I have munchausen syndrome but I am kind of an attention seeker. growing up, I was emotionally and sometimes physically neglected by my drug addict and mentally unstable mother (father out of picture). I also went through an abuse called parentification, where the child and parent roles are switched and I basically was my mother's caretaker, even as a very young child. today I have many problems with stepping into people's lives and trying to "fix their problems" to a point where it damages myself, because that's what I was raised to do, I instinctively think any person in need of help is my responsibility. I'm getting a lot better about this but I still struggle with the impulse. another affect is me being very attention seeking. I'm incredibly introverted so I don't do stuff in public to get attention or anything, but I have exaggerated my conditions I am diagnosed with in the past (I don't do this much anymore), and as a young child I completely fooled my friends into thinking I had magical ice powers (stupid I know but we were like. 5 years old). I don't really do it deliberately, I guess I just subconsciously seek attention because of my past neglect and abuse. I'm also trying to work on this, because I truly do want to be honest with people about my life, I don't want to lie, but again it's mainly subconscious. this is further complicated because I believe I have autism but am not currently able to get diagnosed because 1. biased against females trying to get diagnosed (I'm nonbinary ((completly unrelated to my attention seeking, this is just how I am)) but my biological sex is female) 2. I'm a highschool student who doesn't have the time or energy to go through the long and difficult journey of getting diagnosed 3. I can't afford it. I have been suspecting that I do for years and have done a lot of research,and I'm fairly certain I legitimately have it, but I'm always scared that I'm just tricking myself into thinking I have it for attention. even if I don't force myself to act a certain way and I act natural, I'm still scared it's my brain just tricking myself. I don't expect anyone to coddle me, I actually dislike when people coddle me when I say I'm autistic or have ADHD and GAD (the last two I'm diagnosed with). I want people to treat me like a human and with equality while at the same time realizing my brain doesn't work like most people's and that I need certain accomodations (I don't use my conditions as an excuse, I always try my best just like anyone else, but some things I just can't do or need help with). I guess I just think, if I am somehow faking it, it's my brains way of just trying to get the feeling of being cared for and getting attention since I got none as a child
I have had to go through that too but just so you know, you dont get a formal psych diagnosis through yourself! You get it after a battery of interviews with a qualified Psych test. If you dont get help, your mental problems can manifest as physical illness.
Sometimes doctors misdiagnose people as having Munchausen, histrionic personality disorder or a conversion disorder when they don't know what's wrong with someone. It's the lazy way out. People with ME/CFS can spend years before they are properly diagnosed by a trained physician. When she mentions those with Munchausen delighting on being on the same level as their doctor, it makes me think of people with ME/CFS who must do their own research into their own health. As a result they know a lot about their illness. I can see doctors misinterpreting that as a sign of Munchausen.
I know someone whom says their child has a disability and which she calls the invisible disability. We all know there is nothing wrong with this child but she has her husband believe it. What you said about her getting social media and moving on when people get suspicious are true. I just wish I could somehow get her husband to recognise it
I'd be careful with that. There are also a LOT of people just not willing to accept somebody has a real problem; which lead me to just stop sharing - often important - information; because 1) people don't understand, 2) people won't believe, 3) people don't really care, ... skipping people and doctors in the process is also very normal if they cannot provide the answers and understanding you're looking for. That said, the person in question could as well be delusional because of another illness. There is also something to be said about people with firm beliefs willing to push their own interpretations upon others ;-) Not judging here, but we all tell and hide the stuff we select ourselves, and on the internet, it's just a bunch of flat text without context or facial expressions, reactions, ..
This sounds like my aunt insisting my 7 year old cousin has adhd or autism but she’s more capable then me and I’m 20 with adhd & BPD diagnosed by a doctor
How do you know there is nothing wrong with the child? There are tons of invisible illnesses: seizure disorder, nervous system problems, autoimmune conditions, etc.
There is nothing wrong with my child and he has an invisible developmental syndrome. Often people would say to me "oh there is nothing wrong with him." I'm like yeah I know there is nothing wrong with him, he has Autism. You can't see it and you wont see it unless you live with or have a lot of close contact with him. So regardless of what some may think, his life has been difficult and challenging much more difficult than a child without such a syndrome. When people say to me, like they are some expert, there is nothing wrong, its annoying and draining. Do they think I am just making it up? He has Dr's and psychiatrists and psychologists etc to help him in life, so they were all wrong, I've been living a lie? Its unbelievably rude and offensive to say this to me. What do they know after spending little time with him and what do they know about our struggles? What do they know about the Autistic spectrum ...maybe next to nothing so I think there is a need to be careful here. Autism is often referred to as an invisible disability.
My bestfriend and I have been besties for about 7 years now and about 2 years ago she moved in with me and I started to realize or pick up on the things that she does that seems out of the norm. Like if I had heartburn one night, the next morning she apparently had heartburn, when I asked what symptoms did she experience she said "it felt like my heart was on fire." If I talk about my social anxiety or other mental illnesses and how it makes me feel or what I experience from it, it's almost like she'll keep a mental note of what I said so that the next time the topic of anxiety comes up she will just say what I said but twist it around so that it makes her sound like she knows what she's saying. One time she tore her MCL and would always say that her leg "is broken", whenever you asked what happened she would just say she broke her leg and it would always irritate me bc she knows at least I think she knows that her leg isn't really broken, it's just a torn MCL. She will always make excuses for her bad behaviors and never takes responsibility for her wrong doings, she constantly says that her life is worse than mine, almost as if I'm not allowed to have my own problems bc her life is so much worse. She can't distinguish reality from fantasy (the stories she's told me are to long so I'll just skip that) and she also is planning to go to collage to become a nurse. All of these things plus more, i've written down in my journal since she moved in. So I've suspected that she may or may not have Munchausen.
My former best friend developed a "pain disorder" with no definitive diagnosis. He went from doctor to doctor, hospital to hospital, and he was offended when they couldn't figure out what was wrong with him. He had two huge binders filled with his tests and medical records that he placed neatly in plastic page protectors and would show them off. He would talk about how stupid the doctors were. He always got a "pain attack" at very convenient times, like when he was asked to do chores. He was never too sick to go shopping for designer clothes, though, with his parents' money, since he was too sick to work. He seemed to get off when other people were sad about his condition.
My MIL is always sick when some work has to be done, stomach issues, headaches etc. To get sympathy she is portending that she is deaf, if she doesn't get enough attention all of a sudden she is blind. So nobody expects anything of her and she never has to do anything, everybody else is picking up the slack for her. A couple of time she cut herself, pretending suicide, because she could not manipulate a family member.
My mother exaggerate the symptoms of her illnesses when we argue and she knows that she isn’t right, but the worst part is when she turns the situation to point me as a bad person who doesn’t have mercy and some time she talks very laud to put me in a embarrassment situation. I don’t know what to do because it affect me really hard…some times a cry and shake for hours…
Stuff like this is what makes me so passionate about medicine. Society views these people as monsters. They do monstrous things. But they aren’t monsters this illness has roots in trauma. And it’s really sad. I wish them nothing but the best..
The person I've known who has Munchausen's also exhibits the behavior of only wanting to talk about herself and is quite jealous. I've been the nurturing friend for years but I am giving up.
I'm experiencing the same thing. My friend is always endlessly monologing about all her illnesses. It's a one sided friendship and very difficult to be the shoulder to lean on. I'm pulling away for my own mental health. Xx
It's very draining and exhausting when a friendship or relative relationship is one sided. I realize a huge difference when talking to other friends . The negative energy you absorb from someone who only pours their problems on you is absolutely exhausting and disgusting in my opinion. Definitely can put a weight on your back and hinder your own success by letting someone bare all their burdens in your direction on a frequent basis. Distance is a must as hard as it may be.
I know a covert narcissist that pretends to be Austitic ( never gone to a professional for a real diagnosis) but uses this as a way to excuse bad behaviour and control people financially and play a victim. Awful tactic to completely avoid the responsibility of being an adult. With grandiose ideas of being spiritually gifted and ´more in tune ‘ and special than others because they are autistic.
goodness - do we know the same person?? the one i know is exactly as you describe and now wants to jump on the autism/tylenol lawsuit bandwagon and so is quite determined to be formally acknowledged as autistic; has told us of their self-diagnosis via youtube/google channels. any lack of belief on our part brings instant rage and attempts at justifications for why they are, "in fact", autistic.
@@ghilly_one1720 sorry you have to deal with that, my only option was to keep my distance, I noticed that every time would hear a fact About autism, it would be added to her self defining language with everyone she knew, she did not show signs of autism but used ‘we autistic people’ a lot in a superior way, as if she was better ‘connected’ and special… a bit too much self inflation and no remorse for an autistic person. This is an interesting video on the topic: th-cam.com/video/XEDda93M_mg/w-d-xo.html
I have been dealing with my mother in law since I met her. I don't know what to do .she's driving everybody crazy. Special my husband and his brother. Please help me
I've become to realize during my 45 years of life that somethings growing up weren't the norm..my mother would make me crawl on my hands and knees to bathroom during a rainy day,which was often..doctors appointments for symptoms I never mentioned to her, hospital stays because I apparently had stomach problems, so as a child still elementary school getting tubes put down my throat up my behind, fevers to which I never had, being born 1976 and all this happening during the 80's maybe even into early 90's no one ever came forth to say hey..something is very wrong!! Since my sister and I are both outta the home, I can very much still see the disease that my mother is suffering from. Only problem she doesn't have a problem she insists..it's always everyone else's problem. I remember so much bad about my childhood concerning M.P I've questioned mom about why I had this procedure done, or why was I taking this certain medication, she don't even remember, she says I'm lying and it never happened..problem is for her tho..it very much did happen.
My sister has Munchausen. She's presently in a center and has been able to bullshit her way through the the doctors. Why won't the doctors working with her not take a call from the family and get a true story on her.
I think my sister in law has a form of this, but instead of making someone else sick, she’s making herself sick for attention. And she always goes to the doctor.
My mother got caught in this vicious loop of constantly seeking help for me through testing evaluations remediation. I did have some problems tubes in ears, speech problems, language delays, later gross motor skills etc. The more help she kept getting for me the more abnormal I felt as a kid and more problems developed. I felt like a target. She claims she did it to help me and that other people were telling her to do this. Once when I was 8 she took me for more testing and another evaluation. The psychologist stated in his report that this constant evaluations and remediation was causing a lot of undue anxiety and stress making me insecure and constricted child and was making me feel abnormal and should stop. Now I am assuming this is not muchanssen by proxy because there were some issues but her constant need to get help for me made me feel abnormal and something was wrong with me. As I got older and I mentioned what happened to me. I was told my mother was just being a good mother and getting me the help I needed. But throughout my life from age 2-18 this vicious cycle only created more problems what started as a minor problem became a bigger problem. Started as a medical problem then became a learning disorder, and then a psychiatric disorder and then anger and behavioral problems. Only reinforcing the idea that I was indeed a sick disturbed mentally ill teen but when you feel as though your mother is treating you differently and seeing you as needing help and in need of professional help all your life and you just want to be seen as a normal kid. When my sister was diagnosed with epilepsy I was relieved I was hopeful they would focus on her instead and leave me alone. Is this a type of muchanssen by proxy or something else?
I have the same story as you. Before entering a Graduate program in Social-Work, I found it necessary to take myself off of the heavy psychotropic medications that were treating my “epilepsy” I told the neurologist the truth about my Mother, she asked me if I had a therapist, I told her I am a therapist. I told her that the only problems I have are with my mental health and anxiety which keep me from sleeping. I wanted to live a normal teenage life, i wanted to make friends and play sports etc. From the age of 4-24, I believed the delusion that i had epilepsy, scoliosis, serious spinal issues, brain herniation. Now, the pain in my back is my delusion. I don’t trust it. When I advocated for myself and my nephew, a lot of my family seemed to turn against me. She said, “I could go to jail for you saying this, You need to take care of your mental health if you think I made you sick.” I don’t remember being constrained to having a psychiatric disorder, i just remember when i was 17, i was inducted into the National Honor Society in my HighSchool, I kept asking to see my therapist again, my voice wasn’t heard. Soon after, I remember feeling overwhelmingly hopeless. I tried to drown myself in my bathtub. That was when I had been on such enormous amounts of medications, I experienced mock psychosis. They had me in some kind of rehabilitation mental health clinic on Long Island. The Clinicians said I was normal and that I just needed to work on my coping skills. I am 28 years old now. I’m very big on advocating for clean and healthy living, social connectedness, forgiveness and heroism. I only see a Doctor once or twice a year, for things that are obvious, such as gynecologist, Primary Care checkups and doctors notes when I’m too tired to go to work;)
oh my god, the mother forcing salt into her son is extremely triggering. He DIED. while being completely powerless in the situation that was killing him without he even knowing what was happening. Because of the sickness of another person who has way too much power to do whatever they want with you.
I was once asked to tell someone to get off a child’s case by someone in authority 😔. Had I realized at the time what they were saying’ I’d have something sooner. Children need freedom from this type of parent.
I used to call out Auntie Barbara, had emphysema but didn't stop smoking. Every time I saw her shed say poor me and look for attention. After I went to school and learned about it, I marked my text book " AB" but no one listened to me histrionic personality disorder. They even fool people who want to help them.
I do have to say that many health care professionalism doesn't impress me. When they can't read a person, to see if he or she is in pain or in anxiaty. When they can't assess if a person has social or a psycological problem or a medical problem. It doesn't impress me, to put labels on the patients, when so many doctors are failing to pick up common diagnoses, like reumatism etc. However shaming and blaming the patient is very safe to do. Those that are claiming your relatives are nut cases, are you absolutly positive about that? It took me 30 years to get my syndrome diagnosed. I wasn't shopping around for a doctor. I was stickning my head in the sand until I couldn't walk. After that, it took me many, many doctors to get the right diagnos and help. The first diagnos was anxiaty. I have spine reumatism among many things.
Did you know there are a lot of natural healing lifestyles to cope with this? It is not as serious a disease as you may think. Pain can be a small infection. I self treat with oil of oregano and feel less pain in a few days.
My 2nd cousin has Munchausen syndrome and she has 3 kids. When she gave birth to her son she made him so ill he had to have an eating tube inserted into his stomach, she kept ripping it out so she could go to the hospital to get sympathy. The hospital ended up deciding to stop helping her because it wasted there time. She has almost killed her kids multiple times, we have tried multiple times to get Child Protection Services (CPS) to get involved and take the children away but they haven’t looked into it so we can’t do anything else.
My sister has this with her son. It has been very worrisome as a family. She ignores the doctor's orders for behavioral health. What can we do as a family?
Not really. For someone to be diagnosed with personality disorder the three Ps must be Present; Problematic, pervasive and persistent. If someone has just suddenly started presenting to A&E describing various fabricated medical problems then this would indicate factitious disorder. Whereas someone with histrionic PD will often (not always obvious) have a long-standing history of trauma and abuse. Two completely different things as a whole.
I had a friend who faked a mental illness they call ‘mental illness’ (yeah, real creative.) and said they have ‘hallucinations’ (wich of course they used as a personality feature, and an OC instead of telling a doctor.) The person then spied on me with a friends account, called me a bitch, and told me to die.
There’s a guy at work who fakes forgetfulness, and gets me to do his work, even asking for my help when I’m busy with other customers or busy doing other work. He’s not afraid to sit in front of customers for an hour acting like he struggling (embarrassingly slow), but he has not missed coming in to work or ever came in late, or ever got lost in his car in the way to work... so how can he only forget how to do a job he’s had for three years?
My mom has it, she is never healthy… and she honestly pisses me off and I can’t endure that at all bc its obvious that it is faking!! I mean if someone was shot by a gun wouldn’t react to the way she reacts to her fake illness I really hope that there is someway to treat that! And the worst part she never accepts to be wrong she must always be right so it’s .. ugh Idk
U R Right Mam. Very needful Information. May Almighty keep U EVERGREEN 🍀, HAPPY, HEALTHY, ENERGETIC Forever for such a great service for the Painful people. Keep continue. .......
OMG!! I have a gf that has self diagnosed herself with Lyme disease. She has become a expert with it and all the crazy treatments she does because a medical Dr told her she doesn't have it. Has spent $1000's on all these alternative treatments. Certificates for alternative medicine and has her own web page and consults. I can't even listen to her anymore when she starts talking about her relapse, this has been going on for 5yrs or so. Before that it was something else, but it's all related to Lyme. UGH!!
your girlfriend may have chronic fatigue syndrome if she has been experiencing extreme fatigue for over six months, has unrefreshing sleep, experiences brain fog and feel sick or crashes after exerting herself. a lot of people think they have lyme when it's actually CFS. I hope she doesn't have it.
@@mmedeuxchevaux no thats not it. She has been at this for years with her different illnesses. Of course she is 64 but she has never spoken once that its menopausal. She just finished an extreme cleanse of Castro oil and coffee enemas. To relive livers stones she said she had. That went on for 7 days. She about the size of a twig.
My ex had "few weeks to live" for a more than a year. That was not doubt the most traumatic year of my life. she was twice my age... honestly, sometimes I hate her
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Thank you @MedCircle so much for this video!! Please forgive typos etc but if I stop to check this I'll never post it.
My mother was my abuser. She was diagnosed with Narcissistic Personality Disorder when I was 12 although I had no clue then or for many years to follow what that was. After my grandmother died when I was 13 I found myself as her personal slave, cook and housekeeper while she systematically abused me. She would also fake illness herself but never to the extent where it actually harmed her. As a child, I spent all my time going in and out of a variety of hospitals and seeing different doctors, as you say she would avoid anyone who asked difficult questions, calling them "incompetent", "stupid" or "a waste of time". Life, for me, was an endless round of tests, often nasty invasive ones, "accidents", surgeries (that were not necessary) and medication that I did not need. She would also force-feed me with a glupey, salty and very unpleasant solution she made herself - I don't know to this day what was in it but know that it contained lots of salt and laxatives. She also used to make me eat vile, rotting food and when in hospital made me "sweets" that I now suspect contained similar substances to the "glupe". At the age of 11, I had a kidney removed (she created merry hell with the doctors to do this - I remember all the rows) only for the pathology to come back as NAD (nothing abnormal detected...) I've also lost 2 feet of my bowel thanks to her "enemas" and laxative fixation. This had to be removed when I was 19 due to it be necrosed and now, 43 years later I'm facing a colostomy... I've also had really bad health otherwise, 2 primary cancers and other auto-immune issues. I could go on...
When she died I felt exhilarated, free... It was incredible but after living for so long at her beck and call I kind of imploded and unravelled some 4 years after her death. After a year or so of becoming more and more unwell I eventually sought therapy (because it was either that or end it all) and was lucky enough to see a remarkable team who took their time assessing me then diagnosed me with C/PTSD and an eating disorder (ARFID). Thanks to them I'm in a much better place now although fighting a recurrence of the breast cancer I had 18 years ago. By the way, when I was diagnosed with that (grade 4) breast cancer, her reaction was staggering. I remember it as if it was yesterday. When I explained that, at 42, I had a real fight on my hands to live through this and would need surgery followed by aggressive and extensive treatment her first and only reaction was "WELL!! That's all very fine and good but tell me one thing!! Just *WHO* do you suppose is going to look after *ME* *I* need *you* to do that, not for you to have a year off flaked out in some bed somewhere. You are always *so* inconsiderate...!!" There wasn't really anything to say to that.
This is obviously a brief and very-highly condensed version of events that spanned 54 years of my life. Mother had now been dead for 8 years - she died on my 54th birthday after repeatedly telling me she hoped she would "die on a day I'd never forget..." She very much enjoyed any and all attention, the good, the bad and ugly... As you say, her attention-seeking wasn't for money or anything other than that though, the attention was *everything* to her. My own GP was also hers and has said that after requesting my medical records and doing some reading and investigations on my many hospital admissions she is *convinced* mother had Munchausen's by Proxy, I used to feel so cheated of the life I could have had but therapy helped so much with that as did the EMDR I had, which helped enormously with the effects of C/PTSD.
Just remembered mother was also diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder at the same time as the narcissism.
@@PaganღHeart Load of love to you.
@@sundaraselvi325 - blessings back to you & thank you for your kindness. ღ
I like to hear more about co-occurring disorders with manchaussen. My mom is extremely narcissistic and borderline too having manchaussen. She always was laying trap for my father by pretending to be sick. She has done Uterus removed, appendicitis removed, gallbladder removed, eye cataract surgery. She wanted more saying she may have hernia, cyst in ovary. No doctor diagnosed her with Asthma while she was mentioning to everyone that she has asthma. she carefully observes the symptoms of what people with real illness experience and start telling she has the same. I often saw her feeding my toddler brother with Vicks vaporub oinment. I raised it as an alarm to my father when I was 8, my father knew and was not doing anything which traumatised me more than what my mom was doing.
My mother has had " about a year left to live" for as long as I can remember. I'm 34.
Sinnisstar le Riche lol
Lol
Sinnisstar le Riche im sorry i laughed
Yeeessss
@@tamikog7645 I realized quite early on that she wasn't telling the truth but I true it was still traumatizing because I wondered about her intention being telling us that. That and other things.
... this can be extremely serious ... my son dated a girl who’s mother convinced her from an early age that she had a heart condition, and would dote on her constantly ... but in fact was wanting to gain attention for herself ... eventually, after high school, the girl joined the air force to gain distance from her mother ... and obviously, if she had a heart condition she would not have passed the physicals ...
That's not Munchhausen's by Proxy, because she didn't make her daughter sick.
William Norman ... you don’t know the whole story and what she put her daughter through ... it would qualify because for one thing she had her on medications that she didn’t need and caused side effects ...
Giving her medications she didn't need and that caused side effects demonstrate Munchausen's by proxy.
My mom claimed I had ADHD to explain my behavior to my teachers....but it was just deflecting questions of abuse probably. Can't imagine if she had Munchausen by proxy disorder for real 🙊🙊🙊
seventhseance ... I hope you weren’t medicated for it ...
My mother told me from a young age, I was brain damaged, molested by my father and I have stress induced a amnesia. A child with bad genes. As her only daughter she wanted to make sure I never overthrow her alpha female status. I’m now 25 and realised I have no medical records on this. I am really struggling with my life cause I am know clueless of who I am. Thank you for this information
Wow, that is so painful to go through, I'm sorry that happened to you!! Continue working on your healing, you are strong!🖤
Hi I'm Kasey, my childhood life we both have suffered this disease at the hands of our very own mother..I have an 8year old daughter and I never have done to her the way I was growing up. The cycle breaks with me!! I just wish back then someone could have saved me..
there's a Netflix movie about something similar, a mother doing something like that to her only daughter, but has a plot twist.
It's called Run, directed by Aneesh Chaganty
I'm sorry you had to go through all that, I hope you are better now, a year after you commented, and I hope you can overcome it all and have a very bright and happy life, you deserve it.
I'm sorry you had to live through that abuse, no child deserves this
I am so sorry 😞
My mom had munchausen by proxy. I was diagnosed as high functioning aspbergers, and she would tell me i had no depth perception and made me go to physical therapy for low muscle tone. Ive since gone no contact and have been rediagnosed as neurotypical, and i have been working as a dishwasher/prep cook for years, someone with low muscle tone could never physically be capable of. I should note that if you actually have aspbergers or autism you are amazing and beautiful people ❤
Autism is actually the new category for all encompassing. It is just levels of functioning within the diagnoses. My son was officially diagnosed until 17. We knew he had something and received services, but the things found in autism are also seen in my husband, myself and other family members, we never thought about it. We still pushed him to be independent and overcome obstacles, as a parent is supposed to do, so to do. I have worked with those with special needs and also autism even before having kids and still did not see it. But the school did not either. It took hours of testing to get the right one when he was finally able to answer questions himself on tests.
@@tamaravanvoorst448 it sounds like youre doing a good job. i know many people with autism and i don't relate to them, but i do relate to people with classic adhd symptoms. i feel like i have undiagnosed adhd. my parents wanted me to stay "their little girl" forever and never develop at the same time claiming they wanted to cure me and wanted me to overcome my disability that i didn't have. i wanted to be independent but they did everything in their power to keep me from achieving that goal.
@@phoeberaymond8781 actually ADHD is his secondary diagnosis. His older brother has it well. He has depression and anxiety from me..I have bipolar disorder and other issues..some biological and others from trauma. He was told to apply for disability, but he wanted to work. We went that route to get services he might need, housing, and be able to work less if need be. Basically because I had not taken him to a doctor other than for routine medical things, had made sure he could do things like Cook for himself, go to school on his own (got ready on his own as my husband nor myself were at home and his brother graduated before he did), and other things, he was not disabled enough. Other agencies waiting for at least the disability medicaid for things did not understand it. But the place that tested him, still let him pick a place to help him get a job. He got one..only took awhile because although he finished 6 months, he could not graduate until the rest of the class did. The job required at least a high school diploma. He only lives with us because it is more like a roommate situation. He just contributes to the bills like everyone else and rest is for whatever he wants to do with it. He has his own car. He just has to get more driving hours in to get his license. So he has public transportation taken him back n forth to work.
I'm autistic * and felt nice when I read the last part 💛 thank you
(* autism 1, formerly known as Asperger syndrome, still diagnosed as Aspergers in some countries)
@@phoeberaymond8781 you could look into CPTSD.. it could be trauma. Also some psychologists believe ADHD is related to childhood trauma.
Munchausens or covert narcissism? My ex would CONSTANTLY fake mental illness in order to gain sympathy and attention, to the point where I wondered if he had Munchausens (I only stayed a few months, as soon as I worked out what he was - I was gone). Always the victim, nothing was ever his fault - and if he was backed into a corner, or forced to confront his shitty behaviour, his "symptoms" would suddenly "resurface", so he could hide behind it and hence avoid having to take any kind of responsibility for his own life. He spent hours on his phone "researching" mental disorders of all kinds, and if he found a new one - hey presto, he had a new set of "symptoms". Very troubled/dangerous individuals either way...
OMG, my ex-husband is always "sick" and gets dizzy when we are out shopping together. He all of sudden doesn't feel good whenever someone is talking with me. He is never at fault,, either, and he is always too sick to discuss any topic having to do with his being sick. Even after running to the doctor all the time the doctor told him he couldn't find anything wrong. He is exhausting to be around.
My covert narc husband constantly creates drama for attention and pitty. He also has claimed to have a heart condition for over 20 years but doesn’t go to the doctor for it
Did he ever use his illness to get money from you? I think I may have just broke up with a woman who was doing that to me.
@@kuunami he would try to get whatever he could from whoever he could manipulate. I started to notice him almost constantly "borrowing" money from various family members to spend on beer (often after blowing through his benefits in a matter of hours), and he would certainly use whatever he could play on to keep the cycle going. Alcohol/attention/money/drugs are his gods, and I just hope he gets the message and I never hear from or see him again...
My daughter does that. It's not Munchausen's, because they're not making themselves ill by self-poisoning/medicating. It's lying and manipulation.
My mother has been about to die for the 45 years I've been alive, yet the doctors keep saying she's in the prime of her health.
It's sickening right?
My mother does this for attention. She even lies to doctors about her medical history
omg... would you be comfortable to share some more? Like, was your mom diagnosed or is that your suspicion?
With my mom it's not only the weekly 'i feel sick, i have a sore throat' but i noticed she also copies my sicknesses...? Like one day i had a very strong migrane and then the next day (when i was already feeling better) my mother told me she had a very strong headache, stayed mostly in bed, talked very weakly and was happy i brought her tea and stuff... There are countless other examples, this was just the most recent one.
@@KitStupido maybe your mom feels like you owe her because she helped you when you were sick? Ofcourse you don’t owe her. But it looks like that.
@@KitStupido just seeing this comment 2 years later loool. Anyway, I know she's lying because I've taken her to lots of doctors appointments and I've been in the room with her when doctors give her her diagnosis, and then I'll be with her at another doctors visit and I watch her lie about what the last doctor said. I've also seen her devolve into a child when she is able to convince others that she's ill and they take care of her like a little kid.
This is more common than the "rare illness" that is mentioned. Every hospital has frequent flyers. They are not all drug seeking or wanting financial benefit. They need the attention and this is the only way they know how.
I have a former friend with this and she checks all the boxes. She’s a master manipulator. The sad thing is, she’s only gotten worse not better. This video is spot on.
And she’s starting to do it her children. Munchausen by proxy 💯
They often get worse with age.
I went to school with someone who was like that & always manipulated other teachers to get his way
my experience is that significantly more sick people are dismissed as faking, than healthy people are actually faking.
Exactly
Or people not being diagnosed with the proper disorder or physical illness until
A. It's too late
B. They've been on other meds that didn't help the actual problem
This is unrelated to Munchausen By proxy
Found some cases.
Right!!!!!
absolutely.
My mother was ALWAYS sick! There wasn’t a single week during my whole life in which she didn’t have something going on, yet she was so strong to the point of being scary! When I was yet to turn 3, one of my first memories is my own mother telling me that ‘If she died, it would be my fault’; that was after playing dead until I started crying ‘cause I thought she was gone and I would be left alone!
I stopped talking to her a few years ago and I don’t know why I didn’t do it earlier. Nothing can undo what she did to me…
Im so sorry for what she put you through! I have similar experiences... Stay strong! ❤️
My sister most definitely has munchousen!!! She was molested by my brothers, we were neglected by our parents, she's a Registered nurse, her kids were always sick, asthma, seizures etc. and now that they're grown, she has now made herself sick... Shock treatments, depression, Lymes disease, fibromyalgia, had 2/3 Of her colon removed, seizures, scoliosis, warfarin, several P.E.'s, she goes to I.U. and U. Of Louisville to see different doctors, chronic compression fracture... Meaning she fractured her back years ago and didn't know it and on and on it goes.
Our eldest brother is the most evil, sick twisted, and she still talks with him. My family is the house of the millionaire narcissistic liars & manipulating, controling demonics!
I have went no contact with these abusers!
People with BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) will sometimes pretend to have chronic or terminal illnesses if they believe someone they consider a "favorite person" is about to abandon them.
I've also known an adult with BPD who did a kind of doctor-shopping until she could find someone who would give her a full hysterectomy at age 40 (she had no children & it's very difficult to find an ObGyn who will do this in case the female changes her mind that she wants to have children). This female was blaming her vacillating emotions and mood swings on her BPD. She eventually found a surgeon who would do a complete hysterectomy (at age 42, I believe?) and guess what...it changed nothing because it was (and still is) the underlying Cluster B personality disorder that is the root problem and what drives her to behave in such an extreme and rapidly fluctuating manner.
This female with BPD did not want attention...what she wanted was to avoid (perceived) abandonment by the people she considered important to her.
Munchausen and Munchausen by proxy seem to be more about
A) histrionics...getting attention (even negative attention as long as they keep receiving it) and garnering sympathy from others) or possibly...
B) narcissism...being admired by others for being a devoted and selfless caregiver (i.e. garnering statements from other IRL and on social media such as "you're an incredible and loving mother and so strong and selfless"). People with NPD are entirely about seeking admiration (even in such a twisted manner as this...narcissists will do ANYTHING to get admiration from others, even if it means sacrificing their own child).
People with BPD are simply trying to avoid abandonment when they pretend to be terminally ill or chronically ill (they're like toddlers hoping to elicit a caregiving response in those around them).
Good thing i havent done that...😬☹😰 but my question is why would they need to have a fake diagnosis to get the FP to stay? As proof they need their help to keep them stable or help them take care of them? Would really love to hear from the woman for her POV...
Whoaaaaaa! This is exactly what's happening in my family, thank you for saying that!!
@@dawnhewitt1 Sorry to read that, Dawn.
I wish your family well in trying to oust the disordered person (and their sycophant's).
@@le_th_ Thanks so much, you are kind! I'm working my way out of the snakepit, therapy is helping.🖤
what scares me is people who fake disorders or illnesses specifically to claim victimhood. they are scary and manipulative
I saw a movie about this disorder. "A child's cry for help."
Very informative 😥 and sad
I think a tv serie called "Sharp Objects" talks about Munchausen syndrome by proxy too. I always wondered what illness was associated with one of the characters and I think it can be this one
There’s another series abt a real life case of this called ‘the act’.
My wife has this. She goes to Drs for EVERYTHING, never follows through so she never 'heals' then go to a different Dr to do the same. Other parts of this sickness are ripping this family, our 2 yr old beautiful baby girl, and myself, apart. She RAGES out like a toddler having a tantrum. She runs to friends, her Family, my family, and spill so many hurtful lies and I'm used as the crashpad, makes me sound like an otherworldly creature and nothing could be further from the truth. She practically ignores this baby, she cries for her attention and it breaks my heart as I have to pick up the pieces. No idea how to fix this 💔
She most likely has narcissistic personality disorder. Please ask her to see a psychiatrist.
Document everything. Use your phone and record her tantrums etc. Then, DIVORCE.
Save the kid. That kind of behavior will scramble a child's brains like an egg. You don't want your kid to end up like me: a codependent chump who feels guilt at ever saying "no" and pays thousands in therapy just to keep breathing.
Please please protect your kid.❤
Stop posting your kid on TH-cam in the way you do And leave your manipulative insane wife. There’s a start to protecting your child properly.
A friend used to joke that I had Munchausen by proxy in regards to my two dogs. I loved them so much and worried constantly about their health and well-being. I’ll admit that I was a bit neurotic but being vigilant paid off. I just sensed that something was not right. They both had cancer, though different types and at different times. The vet at first thought I was crazy but eventually learned to appreciate and trust my instincts. We were able to get them treatment which extended their lives. Sometimes you have to be a persistent pain in the rear. It was in no way about getting attention.
I'm a court reporter. I've seen in twice in dependency cases. One the mom is a nurse. The second one the mom is an attorney. It's heartbreaking.
My sister did this. She's a hospital pharmacist
My mom was falsely accused when I was a child because I would lose my breath while I was sleeping as a child. It turned out I had a birth defect there was a piece of skin covering my nose and part of my mouth when they took out my tonsils and adenoids. I found out later I have mosaic down Syndrome which may be why I had so many health problems the lady is right when she says you can't just throw the diagnosis around but sadly it does happen. They also miss cases too I know either way it's sad all the way around.
I think my best friends postpartum depression has manifested into this. She or her child (age 3 now) are always either “sick”, at the emergency room, or in some type of therapy or treatment. She’s been to the emergency room for so many things and just keeps doctor shopping. An example of one little thing is- she has a pine nut allergy- but gives herself, her kid, even the dog Benedryl. It’s so weird how manic she gets about things. Last time I talked to her she said she’d had like 16 EKG’s in a month because she’s convinced she has heart issues. It’s hard to watch happen. I wish I knew how to help.
If you believe that this is what's happening to your friend and she's doing it to her child call cys right away. You can report suspected abuse and they will look into it.
I too have a friend like this. I am keeping a close eye on her to make sure she doesn't over do it but she is constantly getting very manic about medical things. I have a nursing background from the past so I know she is full of it on many of her issues but I know she is a good person. She freaks out anytime you mention it to her. I don't know how to help her. She has many doctors who have accused her of it but once they almost killed her son when they ignored her and her son's appendix had burst. Luckily they saved him but she had tried to tell them and they did not believe her. It gets confusing because she does get manic sometimes.
Munchausen? or CHRONIC hypochondriasis
This was very helpful. I've long suspected my mother has this, with a personality disorder as well. She's caused untold damage over the years to our family.
This diagnosis has wrecked my life.
I’m pretty sure Munchausen by proxy is the case with the little girl in “The Sixth Sense” played by Mischa Barton, who as a ghost reached out to Haley Joel Osment’s character and showed him the video of her mom poisoning her.
....she was her step mom & she was trying to kill her..
Yes it was.
I honestly got a bit disappointed. The video was more about the symptoms and not so much the psychology behind the diagnosis...
This is both fascinating & saddening.
I've been in a number of psych wards throughout my years. I've seen a few people in there just for the attention. Their symptoms would suddenly kick in when they thought someone was watching them and told lies about anyone who would call them out. They were annoying, but i wasn't in there to focus on them. I would just avoid them when I noticed them.
it's important to extent empathy towards these people because they still suffer from mental illness and and of themself!
I had a close friend at school who constantly lied about pregnancies and miscarriages , and other medical conditions
I kind of felt sorry for her so i just ignored it all really
She also lied about all sorts of things
I knew it was some form of mental illness
Until i got very sick myself with a neurological condition and my deep deep grief over my health
I was 30
Immediately she told me she had MS
She started this latest BS abouth the condition and i blew.
She had no idea what its like when you have a lifelong condition and you can kiss goodbye to your health
Ive not bothered with her since
Im no longer angry , but i could not ever listen to her stories again
I do have compassion for her
I just try and cope with my situation as best i can without people creating drama
Its such a hard condition to treat
I never heard of this disease until now. But I have always been suspicious of people who bring up their sickness out of nowhere and seek sympathy instead of trying to fight through this suspicious disease that somehow doesn't show symptoms. Usually the person brings it up as an excuse for not completing a job or refusing to do a job. Or when you're discussing about someone who's sick but this person decides to steer the conversation to his/her own sickness.
I have a family member that has this. I even witness this person throw themself down the stairs then claiming it was weakness that caused it. This person is always ill, new diagnosis but wont follow through with treatment. Even mental health care is flighty. She won't keep to her appointments or remain in medication... it's very toxic and I've had to put up some massive boundaries. I sadly can't be around this person very much. It's so draining.
This is great, the first video that actually gets on the level of people who have it and not put down this condition
My mother used to run me to the dr all the time when I was young - even a 'faith healer' for a couple of years because there was 'something wrong with her' . I think this behaviour helped fuel her Covert Narcissistic personality and rationalize the abuse she dished out at home when others weren't around . But look at what an exceptional mother she was .
My grandmother had this. Destroyed our family life. I still feel traumatised by what she did.
I know someone that is always coming up with new illness, mental, health, what ever he can get attention for. He snowballs doctors and online therapists into believing all his different bs. It's crazy
Since 16 years I was reporting to doctors that I feel weak. They made me blood tests which were ok so they were telling me that I’m healthy or I’m looking for attention or am some hypochondriac. Finally my symptoms stated to grow up. There were also new ones. Around one month ago eventually tomography showed up that I had some area of my brain changed in way which accurately explains my symptoms and that they were all those years true but I was on my own without medical support. No one took me serious until last year. Doctors were scared what illnesses is it. Time was going on. They couldn’t write in papers that i should rest nor treat my condition because they didn’t know what is it.This is f*cking cruel. Additionally I’m children from dysfunctional/narcissistic family and I was in serious trouble all those years.
My husband's mother had this - everyone knew, but nothing was ever done about it to my knowlege. My husband's brother was born with only one kidney which was infected so he nearly died - that's what i was told so i don't know how true that is - but as a result she became obsessed with his health (even though he was healthier than me!) & she took great delight in having to take him to the doctor for the slightest thing, or, joy of joys, to the hospital. My doctor was horrified when i told her i was getting married because she thought i was marrying him insteadnof his brother - she said, "Oh god, not him? You do know his mother brings him down here nearly every day over the slightest thing?!" I reasured her it wasn't him i was marrying but his brother. She said, "well buckle the seat belt & be prepared for a bummpy ride". The mother never let this son have a life of his own, was still bathing him in his teens & 20s, & even sleeping with him - because she said he missed his brother when we got married as they used to share a room (with beds pushed right together which was creepy & not because of lack of space). She would make up illnesses for him which he believed & she would have 'funny turns', dizzy spells or if all else failed turn on the tears if he so much as wanted to go out sonewhere with even a male friend later in life. I was told by other members of the family that she soon put a stop to any female contact. There were huge rows in the family when he passed his driving test & wanted to get a car - because it meant another step towards independance which she coukdn't tolerate. My husband said she started when they were very young making them believe that she was the only woman they needed in life & that if his brother hadn't come along with his one kidney he would probably gone the same way but because she turned all her attention on his brother he had at least some freedom to go out with friends, although she never liked him having girlfriends either. It quickly became apparent that she really didn't like me, & that dislike grew when she realised i could see right through her ridiculous antics & wouldn't conform to her crazy ideas. She was a very controlling covert narcissist who would have tantrums or turn on the silent treatment & withdraw when the three men in her life (weak enabler husband & 2 conforming sons) went against her, which could be as trifling as wearing a different shirt to the one she'd laid out - she chose their clothes every day (i married my husband when he was 29 & he was still afraid of putting on something other than what she'd put ready for hiim). Then, one day, all became clear when my husband's father said that i was on to a loser before i'd even started because not only did i come along & take her 'little boy' away from her but i went on to have the daughter she'd always wanted & which she blamed him for not giving her, & that ahe'd punished him by not sleeping with him since the birth of their second son. This was said when she wasn't present, but he of course denied saying it when i told her what he'd said some years later when she got into an argument with me (so if he didn't tell me, how did i know this information?!) My husband's brother never got married - the mother yelled at me, "he's been too ill to get married", & he then yelled the same thing at me, "i've been too ill to get married". She yelled, "we've got bad legs", hitching up her skirt & showing me her knees which looked ok to me but who am i to judge?! He then yelled the same, hitchiing up his trouser legs, "i've got bad legs"! Gee, it would've been hilarious if it hadn't been so sad. He stayed with her until the day she died so her control to make him never leave her paid off because she was always afraid of being abandoned, esp when her husband died, &, sadly, he is now quite apparently a narcissist like her. I pity the woman who may ever become involved with him now he's 'free', but he would probably choose someone either like his weak father eho conforms to his every wish, or like his narcissistic mother because he likes to be 'cared for' in the same way she 'cared' for him. It seems there is no justice in this world, so i hope there is in the next, if there is one.
I think my colleague has Munchausen. As the weeks and months has gone by I’ve noticed she’s absolutely obsessed with illnesses and that’s literally all she talks about, every day. She’s constantly talking about aches and pains. She pretty much has every illness under the sun. Something is always “wrong”. Yesterday it was back pain, today it was a UTI, last week it was a collapsed lung. It just never ends. If she doesn’t have something that’s bothering her right now, she talks about when she was hospitalized with something else - and she talks about it like it’s some sort of a badge of honor. I’ve also noticed she talks about nothing ELSE but illness. She has zero interest in anything else. Never talks about maybe having enjoyed a good movie or book or anything at all. Only illness. I’ve started ignoring her every time she tries to bring up another illness or pain. She’s mad at me for that, but I very much enjoy the silence 🤭
I had a brain tumour as a child which is all healed now, but I believe it caused similar symptoms to the ones you described. I don't think I try to pass myself off as being mentally unwell or try to cause it, but I'm almost compelled to act weak or incapable around those I perceive as "grown up" though I myself am an adult. This is especially prevalent with my mum, I notice that I infantilise myself around her because I want her to look after me like when I was in hospital.
Well done for having the insight into your feelings, that means you can work on them. Good luck to you.
Maybe you still seek love from your mother because you didn’t receive it when you were little. Therefore it’s difficult to not act like that around her. You can look into CPTSD if you are still struggling with these reactions around her.
Finally an explanation from experts instead of from pseudointellectual commentary channels
this is what happened to me :( im afraid to tell my family because now my family thinks im just mentally ill and Christmas is always hard bc I don’t want to tell my family this because I love them, but I’ve been ostracized because they all think I’m just crazy now
I'm exactly in the same situation
Me too.....I'm also going through this.. I don't know, should I tell someone or what :)
_Oh no, the consequences of my own actions!_ According to this video, it's not that your family "thinks" you're mentally ill, Munchausen is, in fact, a mental disorder. Look on the bright side: you can finally get that attention you crave from a psychologist and it won't be another one of your lies!
I learned about Munchausen/Factitious Disorder last year and realized it was what my ex bf had. He claimed that he had stage 3 lung cancer developing into stage 4, as well as brain tumor that was causing him occasional visual hallucination. He wanted me to stay over night at his place in case he stops breathing during his sleep. Often he acted as if he stopped breathing and lost consciousness. He generally lied about many things along w his medical conditions for about a yr we were together. As I found him suspicious after a few months and tried to leave him, he started threatening me and stalking me. But the real reason why I couldn't leave him was because of the question ringing in my head, "what if he's actually sick?" If I knew about Manchausen back then, I'd have taken a different action. And it became one of the reasons why I started studying psychology.
I’m someone who has seizures and bad acid reflux and I seriously despise people who fake illnesses. I knew one person whose mom faked colon cancer for 11 years to cover up her drug habit and I believe that is Manchausen. After 11 years of faking, she told her dad that her mom was faking and they got divorced and the mom was left homeless. It’s a screwed up story.
I like to hear more about co-occurring disorders with manchaussen. My mom is extremely narcissistic and borderline too having manchaussen. She always was laying trap for my father by pretending to be sick. She has done Uterus removed, appendicitis removed, gallbladder removed, eye cataract surgery. She wanted more saying she may have hernia, cyst in ovary. No doctor diagnosed her with Asthma while she was mentioning to everyone that she has asthma. she carefully observes the symptoms of what people with real illness experience and start telling she has the same. I often saw her feeding my toddler brother with Vicks vaporub oinment. I raised it as an alarm to my father when I was 8, my father knew and was not doing anything which traumatised me more than what my mom was doing.
Sundara selvi narcissistic personality disorder is strongly associated with faking or exaggerating illness
Seems more like NPD though...it's usually something to get people to feel sorry for them or pity them. Other times it's for positive attention like getting gifts or people caring for them.
I know several people like that.
Had an ex like that. Was something different every few weeks, a long list of mental disorders that he looked up on the Internet. Some new ones came up every now and again, it was just becoming ridiculous. And I noticed a pattern, his "symptoms" would ease off a bit, then as soon as there was something taking attention away from him, he was suddenly in the throes of "serious mental illness". He was also controlling, jealous of anything I did outside of his vicinity and used to gaslight constantly, to the point where I was a complete basket case. I recently realised that he was a covert narcissist, and was faking everything to gain sympathy and attention - I got out of there as quickly as I could, just as well I had only known him a few months, as it could have been far worse...
I have this (munchausen syndrome), the reason why? Is because I have narcissistic neglectful parents, I was born premature with cerebral palsy, and I always thought of the hospital/clinic to be my safe haven, to get away from my parents, also at the hospital I see other people who struggle with a disability, and it gives me a feeling of reliability, and knowing I'm not alone, also since I had neglectful caretakers, I enjoyed when doctors gave me attention.
I also suffered from early childhood sexual trauma, along with verbal abuse, which resulted in chronic pain, and my parents didn't believe me that my trauma was real. Which confusesd me, and made me question myself. Despite knowing 100% that was real.
In reality I wanted to be really loved and appreciated, now that I'm older, and found a person who loves me and I love them, I rarely fake completely.
I just like to say, people who tend to have this, have trauma, (from other people experiences and mine). I would just like to say I went to therapy, and I realize my intentions weren't so great, and I'm much better now ❤️
@DeadSunsetRises that's great news, mental illnesses are like programs, the sooner you find flaws in the program, the more realization and help you get it. Trust me it's works. I also hope you have a safe journey of recovering.
This is what my friend has been duping me with for the last seven years. I think it's time to say goodbye cause I'm totally worn out.
Dear MedCircle, have you ever known of any doctors exhibiting Munchausens by Proxy via their patients?
My doctor diagnosed me with Ankylosing Spondylitis (AS) in my early 30s when I reported lower back pain, regardless of telling him I had hurt my back moving a large TV a few months earlier. He referred me to a specialist who took one look at an X-ray and confirmed the diagnosis without ever examining me.
I spent the better part of my 30s taking powerful anti-inflammatories and fearing life with a fully fused spine. I questioned the diagnosis on multiple visits as my back didn’t seem to be getting worse.
Eventually, an osteopath I was seeing insisted I way too flexible and couldn’t have AS. She referred me to a sports-medicine doctor in her clinic who ordered a CAT scan of my spine and there was no sign of the disease.
When I told my GP, he was smug and almost appeared to be offended that I questioned his diagnosis. I’ve never heard of an AS remission, and if it was possible you would think he’d be elated.
In this case, it was almost as though he wanted to brag about having a patient with the disease.
No that is actually considered medical duress so they can influence how you make personal decisions and it is illegal.
Believe my mother in law has a mild case of Munchausen. She has Dependent Personality Disorder and when she is forced to be alone, she comes up with these strange illnesses, she will complain of being dizzy or stomach pain and the list goes on. And when she is "ill" she will call about 4-5 people complaining to them about her illness, but when her son (my husband) tells her, "if it's that bad go to the emergency room" she scoffs at him and says, "just for that?" She's not wanting help, she's wanting attention. Magically her illnesses never appeared when she lived temporarily with her sister because she got the attention on a constant daily basis. She will be living on her own for the first time in her life since her spouse died (she's in her 70's), and we're afraid this is going to happen constantly. She has rec'd a clean bill of health from her doctor. She also loves to be the bearer of bad news: "so and so is sick" or "so and so has died" in every single conversation. Dealing with someone with any type of attention-seeking disorder is frustrating and exhausting to say the least.
So happy that there's a video on this there's not a lot of information on factitious disorder or Munchausen.
As a child my mom took me to all kinds of doctors and would tell people that I would be in a wheelchair by the time I was 30. Then the tables turned as I got to be 14 and was kicked out to start my adult life on my own. And I thank God for it! My parents are not healthy people.
And guess what I wasn't in a wheelchair at 30 I'm 48 and still not in a wheelchair.
Whenever somebody gets sick or has a medical issue that puts them in the hospital my mom also gets sick or injured calling everyone in the family to seek attention for her illness / injury.
I am a violent crime Survivor with severe spinal cord damage.
I was diagnosed with PTSD so my mom said that she was diagnosed with PTSD.
I had neuropathy due to 8 herniated discs in my spine. And had 4 spinal fusion and decompression surgeries.
So my mom said she went to the doctor and got diagnosed with neuropathy too.
When I asked her what's causing the neuropathy?
She said she doesn't know.
I believe she does this to Discount my pain and struggle during my recovery. I spent a year in bed and had to learn to walk again and my family or mother was no part of my recovery in any way.
My sister had varicose veins within a half an hour she was calling me telling me she has varicose veins.
I would definitely describe my mom is a covert narcissist or borderline. She's jealous and passive aggressive. But instead of threatening suicide she fakes illnesses or has accidents to get its attention from other members of the family. She fakes many illnesses and health issues.
She's a retired RN so she knows how to manipulate the system.
My sister mentioned she was a retired RN in the hospital during one of her procedures and she got mad at her saying I don't want them to know.
My brother was dying in the ICU.
instead of being concerned my mom was so jealous that people didn't stop by and see her too.
She went to go visit him and said he was being mean/ abusive to her. Because she was complaining about her knee issues and he told her to go get some medical marijuana...lol
I said he was in the ICU on a lot of medication after being in a coma for two days. When people don't feel good they're not super nice or happy to see you.
I don't think it was necessarily a good place for her to bring up her health issues to somebody who just got out of a coma.
After that me and my sister knew she was going to slip trip or fall to try to get more attention.
And she did.
Now after reading one of the comments they mentioned something about people not believing you when you have real s*** going on.
I absolutely know what that's like!! Because a lot of people look at me and don't think that I have spinal cord injury. I have all kinds of neurological issues affecting me from the waist down and both of my arms.
And they wouldn't know unless I took off my shirt to see my scar's. But I also don't wear it like a badge of honor or present it as part of my personality for everybody to know. I am so much more than what has happened to me or my physical limitations.
And I'm also responsible for working on healing every day!
In fact I usually don't like to discuss it because it brings up issues related to trauma for me.
People usually innocently ask about the knife mark across my throat.
And sometimes people get traumatized by me just describing what happened.
It's a long story and not everybody is worth telling it to.
So I really don't care what people think when I use the riding cart around the store or when they get behind me and I'm walking slow...lol
But I don't seek validation from other people. And I don't need other people to believe me for it to be real.
I was 15. Not 14 that was a typo..oops
Unfortunately doctors spent years accusing my mother of Munchausen by proxy. If they’d listened to either us I might not be disabled now. Doctors need to be so careful before saying a patient is lying just because they don’t know how to treat or are unsure in some way.
My mil does this solely for attention. She is a total narcissist, she does it all the time! EVERY gathering with all the family she thinks should be about her and if it’s not, she will find a way to fall, make herself fall, or fabricate an illness so she’d need a to go to the er, Then my fil has to foot the bill for her actions. It is so horrible. They were here in town and I saw it coming, the morning they were supposed to leave my husband and I got up for work, a couple hours later I got a text from my husband saying she fell. I texted omg is she at the hospital?? He said no she just fell in their hotel room between the wall and the bed, and she’s fine. I asked my husband later if she was ok why did he text you and tell you she fell, my husband said idk because she wasn’t hurt but she wanted us all to know she fell. Ugh!! This drives me nuts. She is so crazy!!
I have the exact same scenario with my mil. I can't stand her but I fake liking her not to cause problems. She's a controlling bitch with all her endless ankle sores.
I pretend I'm sick when I don't want to go to work
Brutus Pounder That’s called malingering. Malingering is when you fake a health issue deliberately in order to gain some material benefit, such as money.
You are lazy.
Munchausens confirmed
same
Wouldn't this disorder be considered manipulation since the individual is aware that they don't have the illness they're trying act out?
I have a suspicion that this sort of experience of faking illnesses might be common among Psychopathic and Narcissistic individuals?
The Psychopath would fake an illness just for the entertainment of manipulating a therapist, while the Narcissist would obviously seek the attention and sympathy?
I was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder twenty years ago, did ten years of weekly therapy and now I feel better. I have an impulsive behaviour and suicidal tendencies. I wish to get cancer, I crave the attention a serious illness would bring. I believe i wouldn't be able to fake the symptons, I wish to have cancer for real. To many of you who are reading this right now might think I'm cuckoo, and I don't know if you are right. God, it's so good to tell other people how I feel, even if it is in a TH-cam page. Thanx for reading...
I'm glad you're honest with yourself about it ❤
Go to therapy that’s not a normal thought. This isn’t a borderline trait, you may have another co-existing mental health problem.
now get help.
You just described Roula Pispirigkou, a Greek mother who's suspected of killing her three little girls, it's shocking, she did all of the things you described (Munchausen by Proxy).
I have a few medical ailments, there’s been people getting my symptoms, I never understood why and thought I was infectious through a spinal injury. Made no sense.
When I’ve been at the hospital, and a pain /injury symptom episode came up, three other people would share the same episode and exaggerate it, which made it seem like all issues had the same symptoms
This BS really affects the decisions of healthcare professionals, so please try to respect when there’s a wish to be respected
Discomfort can lead to irrelevant speech by the patient when thy try to get their problem treated.
Thank you for the insight, and dr Mike’s forwarding
my mother threatened me and gaslighted me to make me fake dyslexia and aspergers as a child. I just pretended I couldn't do whatever teachers and psychologists told me to do, and that was the diagnosis they came up with. Disturbing how easy it was to fake it
My sister did that to her son. Now she gets domiciliary care allowance for "caring" for a disabled child. She also pretended he had dangerous nut allergies. She posted an article on fb with a picture of a young man had a peanut allergy and the headine said "I can never kiss a girl because it could kill me". There's nothing wrong with him except that he has a narcissist mother.
It's scary when they want to take everything out on you then blame shift back to themselves
Could this explain the trend in young people who live out mental illness or even common diagnosis like asthma as an indentity? It’s like they glorify disability.
I like the comment that said everyone in society is faking a mental illness. I think it's the Doctor's some aren't good people they lie too and get their doctors friends to help them out and it's crazy because it's just a job to them but this is people real life they are playing with.
This sounds like my sister. Can a kid learn it from their parent? Because my mother was like this. She'd make up illnesses to get attention and then magically they would disappear. And these were serious illnesses she said she had.
If a child can learn something like this from her parents? A big YES. Our parents are what initially shapes our perception of what is reality and how it works.
I don't think I have munchausen syndrome but I am kind of an attention seeker. growing up, I was emotionally and sometimes physically neglected by my drug addict and mentally unstable mother (father out of picture). I also went through an abuse called parentification, where the child and parent roles are switched and I basically was my mother's caretaker, even as a very young child. today I have many problems with stepping into people's lives and trying to "fix their problems" to a point where it damages myself, because that's what I was raised to do, I instinctively think any person in need of help is my responsibility. I'm getting a lot better about this but I still struggle with the impulse. another affect is me being very attention seeking. I'm incredibly introverted so I don't do stuff in public to get attention or anything, but I have exaggerated my conditions I am diagnosed with in the past (I don't do this much anymore), and as a young child I completely fooled my friends into thinking I had magical ice powers (stupid I know but we were like. 5 years old). I don't really do it deliberately, I guess I just subconsciously seek attention because of my past neglect and abuse. I'm also trying to work on this, because I truly do want to be honest with people about my life, I don't want to lie, but again it's mainly subconscious.
this is further complicated because I believe I have autism but am not currently able to get diagnosed because 1. biased against females trying to get diagnosed (I'm nonbinary ((completly unrelated to my attention seeking, this is just how I am)) but my biological sex is female) 2. I'm a highschool student who doesn't have the time or energy to go through the long and difficult journey of getting diagnosed 3. I can't afford it. I have been suspecting that I do for years and have done a lot of research,and I'm fairly certain I legitimately have it, but I'm always scared that I'm just tricking myself into thinking I have it for attention. even if I don't force myself to act a certain way and I act natural, I'm still scared it's my brain just tricking myself. I don't expect anyone to coddle me, I actually dislike when people coddle me when I say I'm autistic or have ADHD and GAD (the last two I'm diagnosed with). I want people to treat me like a human and with equality while at the same time realizing my brain doesn't work like most people's and that I need certain accomodations (I don't use my conditions as an excuse, I always try my best just like anyone else, but some things I just can't do or need help with). I guess I just think, if I am somehow faking it, it's my brains way of just trying to get the feeling of being cared for and getting attention since I got none as a child
I have had to go through that too but just so you know, you dont get a formal psych diagnosis through yourself! You get it after a battery of interviews with a qualified Psych test. If you dont get help, your mental problems can manifest as physical illness.
Yep definitely met a lot of girls that acted this way from Tinder or Instagram.
Sometimes doctors misdiagnose people as having Munchausen, histrionic personality disorder or a conversion disorder when they don't know what's wrong with someone. It's the lazy way out. People with ME/CFS can spend years before they are properly diagnosed by a trained physician. When she mentions those with Munchausen delighting on being on the same level as their doctor, it makes me think of people with ME/CFS who must do their own research into their own health. As a result they know a lot about their illness. I can see doctors misinterpreting that as a sign of Munchausen.
I know someone whom says their child has a disability and which she calls the invisible disability. We all know there is nothing wrong with this child but she has her husband believe it. What you said about her getting social media and moving on when people get suspicious are true. I just wish I could somehow get her husband to recognise it
I'd be careful with that. There are also a LOT of people just not willing to accept somebody has a real problem; which lead me to just stop sharing - often important - information; because 1) people don't understand, 2) people won't believe, 3) people don't really care, ... skipping people and doctors in the process is also very normal if they cannot provide the answers and understanding you're looking for. That said, the person in question could as well be delusional because of another illness. There is also something to be said about people with firm beliefs willing to push their own interpretations upon others ;-) Not judging here, but we all tell and hide the stuff we select ourselves, and on the internet, it's just a bunch of flat text without context or facial expressions, reactions, ..
This sounds like my aunt insisting my 7 year old cousin has adhd or autism but she’s more capable then me and I’m 20 with adhd & BPD diagnosed by a doctor
How do you know there is nothing wrong with the child? There are tons of invisible illnesses: seizure disorder, nervous system problems, autoimmune conditions, etc.
There is nothing wrong with my child and he has an invisible developmental syndrome. Often people would say to me "oh there is nothing wrong with him." I'm like yeah I know there is nothing wrong with him, he has Autism. You can't see it and you wont see it unless you live with or have a lot of close contact with him. So regardless of what some may think, his life has been difficult and challenging much more difficult than a child without such a syndrome. When people say to me, like they are some expert, there is nothing wrong, its annoying and draining. Do they think I am just making it up? He has Dr's and psychiatrists and psychologists etc to help him in life, so they were all wrong, I've been living a lie? Its unbelievably rude and offensive to say this to me. What do they know after spending little time with him and what do they know about our struggles? What do they know about the Autistic spectrum ...maybe next to nothing so I think there is a need to be careful here. Autism is often referred to as an invisible disability.
Emily when the child is more stressed around the mother but completely fine when the parent is gone .. that says a lot!
My bestfriend and I have been besties for about 7 years now and about 2 years ago she moved in with me and I started to realize or pick up on the things that she does that seems out of the norm. Like if I had heartburn one night, the next morning she apparently had heartburn, when I asked what symptoms did she experience she said "it felt like my heart was on fire." If I talk about my social anxiety or other mental illnesses and how it makes me feel or what I experience from it, it's almost like she'll keep a mental note of what I said so that the next time the topic of anxiety comes up she will just say what I said but twist it around so that it makes her sound like she knows what she's saying. One time she tore her MCL and would always say that her leg "is broken", whenever you asked what happened she would just say she broke her leg and it would always irritate me bc she knows at least I think she knows that her leg isn't really broken, it's just a torn MCL. She will always make excuses for her bad behaviors and never takes responsibility for her wrong doings, she constantly says that her life is worse than mine, almost as if I'm not allowed to have my own problems bc her life is so much worse. She can't distinguish reality from fantasy (the stories she's told me are to long so I'll just skip that) and she also is planning to go to collage to become a nurse. All of these things plus more, i've written down in my journal since she moved in. So I've suspected that she may or may not have Munchausen.
Its been 9mo. Please tell me shes not still planning on becoming a nurse?!
My former best friend developed a "pain disorder" with no definitive diagnosis. He went from doctor to doctor, hospital to hospital, and he was offended when they couldn't figure out what was wrong with him. He had two huge binders filled with his tests and medical records that he placed neatly in plastic page protectors and would show them off. He would talk about how stupid the doctors were. He always got a "pain attack" at very convenient times, like when he was asked to do chores. He was never too sick to go shopping for designer clothes, though, with his parents' money, since he was too sick to work. He seemed to get off when other people were sad about his condition.
My MIL is always sick when some work has to be done, stomach issues, headaches etc. To get sympathy she is portending that she is deaf, if she doesn't get enough attention all of a sudden she is blind. So nobody expects anything of her and she never has to do anything, everybody else is picking up the slack for her. A couple of time she cut herself, pretending suicide, because she could not manipulate a family member.
My mother exaggerate the symptoms of her illnesses when we argue and she knows that she isn’t right, but the worst part is when she turns the situation to point me as a bad person who doesn’t have mercy and some time she talks very laud to put me in a embarrassment situation.
I don’t know what to do because it affect me really hard…some times a cry and shake for hours…
Stuff like this is what makes me so passionate about medicine. Society views these people as monsters. They do monstrous things. But they aren’t monsters this illness has roots in trauma. And it’s really sad. I wish them nothing but the best..
The person I've known who has Munchausen's also exhibits the behavior of only wanting to talk about herself and is quite jealous. I've been the nurturing friend for years but I am giving up.
I'm experiencing the same thing. My friend is always endlessly monologing about all her illnesses. It's a one sided friendship and very difficult to be the shoulder to lean on. I'm pulling away for my own mental health. Xx
It's very draining and exhausting when a friendship or relative relationship is one sided. I realize a huge difference when talking to other friends . The negative energy you absorb from someone who only pours their problems on you is absolutely exhausting and disgusting in my opinion. Definitely can put a weight on your back and hinder your own success by letting someone bare all their burdens in your direction on a frequent basis. Distance is a must as hard as it may be.
I know a covert narcissist that pretends to be Austitic ( never gone to a professional for a real diagnosis) but uses this as a way to excuse bad behaviour and control people financially and play a victim. Awful tactic to completely avoid the responsibility of being an adult. With grandiose ideas of being spiritually gifted and ´more in tune ‘ and special than others because they are autistic.
goodness - do we know the same person?? the one i know is exactly as you describe and now wants to jump on the autism/tylenol lawsuit bandwagon and so is quite determined to be formally acknowledged as autistic; has told us of their self-diagnosis via youtube/google channels. any lack of belief on our part brings instant rage and attempts at justifications for why they are, "in fact", autistic.
@@ghilly_one1720 sorry you have to deal with that, my only option was to keep my distance, I noticed that every time would hear a fact About autism, it would be added to her self defining language with everyone she knew, she did not show signs of autism but used ‘we autistic people’ a lot in a superior way, as if she was better ‘connected’ and special… a bit too much self inflation and no remorse for an autistic person.
This is an interesting video on the topic:
th-cam.com/video/XEDda93M_mg/w-d-xo.html
@@tanausu7 love Dr Ramani.
Real Talk!!! Point by point, awareness is a gift and a blessing.
I have been dealing with my mother in law since I met her. I don't know what to do .she's driving everybody crazy. Special my husband and his brother. Please help me
I've become to realize during my 45 years of life that somethings growing up weren't the norm..my mother would make me crawl on my hands and knees to bathroom during a rainy day,which was often..doctors appointments for symptoms I never mentioned to her, hospital stays because I apparently had stomach problems, so as a child still elementary school getting tubes put down my throat up my behind, fevers to which I never had, being born 1976 and all this happening during the 80's maybe even into early 90's no one ever came forth to say hey..something is very wrong!! Since my sister and I are both outta the home, I can very much still see the disease that my mother is suffering from. Only problem she doesn't have a problem she insists..it's always everyone else's problem. I remember so much bad about my childhood concerning M.P I've questioned mom about why I had this procedure done, or why was I taking this certain medication, she don't even remember, she says I'm lying and it never happened..problem is for her tho..it very much did happen.
I blame Drs for going along with the nonsense. When a Mom is so excited to see a Dr...someone ought to know that is not really a fun playdate.
My sister has Munchausen. She's presently in a center and has been able to bullshit her way through the the doctors. Why won't the doctors working with her not take a call from the family and get a true story on her.
I think my sister in law has a form of this, but instead of making someone else sick, she’s making herself sick for attention. And she always goes to the doctor.
Have a friend that told me, her PCP diagnosed her with this. Now I don’t know what to believe!!!!!
My life makes sense now. Thank you.
My mother got caught in this vicious loop of constantly seeking help for me through testing evaluations remediation. I did have some problems tubes in ears, speech problems, language delays, later gross motor skills etc. The more help she kept getting for me the more abnormal I felt as a kid and more problems developed. I felt like a target. She claims she did it to help me and that other people were telling her to do this. Once when I was 8 she took me for more testing and another evaluation. The psychologist stated in his report that this constant evaluations and remediation was causing a lot of undue anxiety and stress making me insecure and constricted child and was making me feel abnormal and should stop. Now I am assuming this is not muchanssen by proxy because there were some issues but her constant need to get help for me made me feel abnormal and something was wrong with me. As I got older and I mentioned what happened to me. I was told my mother was just being a good mother and getting me the help I needed. But throughout my life from age 2-18 this vicious cycle only created more problems what started as a minor problem became a bigger problem. Started as a medical problem then became a learning disorder, and then a psychiatric disorder and then anger and behavioral problems. Only reinforcing the idea that I was indeed a sick disturbed mentally ill teen but when you feel as though your mother is treating you differently and seeing you as needing help and in need of professional help all your life and you just want to be seen as a normal kid. When my sister was diagnosed with epilepsy I was relieved I was hopeful they would focus on her instead and leave me alone. Is this a type of muchanssen by proxy or something else?
I have the same story as you. Before entering a Graduate program in Social-Work, I found it necessary to take myself off of the heavy psychotropic medications that were treating my “epilepsy” I told the neurologist the truth about my Mother, she asked me if I had a therapist, I told her I am a therapist. I told her that the only problems I have are with my mental health and anxiety which keep me from sleeping. I wanted to live a normal teenage life, i wanted to make friends and play sports etc. From the age of 4-24, I believed the delusion that i had epilepsy, scoliosis, serious spinal issues, brain herniation. Now, the pain in my back is my delusion. I don’t trust it. When I advocated for myself and my nephew, a lot of my family seemed to turn against me. She said, “I could go to jail for you saying this, You need to take care of your mental health if you think I made you sick.” I don’t remember being constrained to having a psychiatric disorder, i just remember when i was 17, i was inducted into the National Honor Society in my HighSchool, I kept asking to see my therapist again, my voice wasn’t heard. Soon after, I remember feeling overwhelmingly hopeless. I tried to drown myself in my bathtub. That was when I had been on such enormous amounts of medications, I experienced mock psychosis. They had me in some kind of rehabilitation mental health clinic on Long Island. The Clinicians said I was normal and that I just needed to work on my coping skills. I am 28 years old now. I’m very big on advocating for clean and healthy living, social connectedness, forgiveness and heroism. I only see a Doctor once or twice a year, for things that are obvious, such as gynecologist, Primary Care checkups and doctors notes when I’m too tired to go to work;)
@@samanthacampbell9748 While this is compelling, what can you as a social worker do for yourself to help yourself cope and so forth?
oh my god, the mother forcing salt into her son is extremely triggering. He DIED. while being completely powerless in the situation that was killing him without he even knowing what was happening. Because of the sickness of another person who has way too much power to do whatever they want with you.
my mom has it, and she be thinking that her fake illnesses should make me more empathetic to her hate
I was once asked to tell someone to get off a child’s case by someone in authority 😔. Had I realized at the time what they were saying’ I’d have something sooner. Children need freedom from this type of parent.
I feel like a lot of this is in nutrition counseling practice. I've heard of all kinds of odd made up diseases.
I used to call out Auntie Barbara, had emphysema but didn't stop smoking. Every time I saw her shed say poor me and look for attention. After I went to school and learned about it, I marked my text book " AB" but no one listened to me histrionic personality disorder. They even fool people who want to help them.
I do have to say that many health care professionalism doesn't impress me. When they can't read a person, to see if he or she is in pain or in anxiaty. When they can't assess if a person has social or a psycological problem or a medical problem. It doesn't impress me, to put labels on the patients, when so many doctors are failing to pick up common diagnoses, like reumatism etc. However shaming and blaming the patient is very safe to do. Those that are claiming your relatives are nut cases, are you absolutly positive about that? It took me 30 years to get my syndrome diagnosed. I wasn't shopping around for a doctor. I was stickning my head in the sand until I couldn't walk. After that, it took me many, many doctors to get the right diagnos and help. The first diagnos was anxiaty. I have spine reumatism among many things.
You just have back pain because you’re old. Most of us do, you ain’t special.
Did you know there are a lot of natural healing lifestyles to cope with this? It is not as serious a disease as you may think. Pain can be a small infection. I self treat with oil of oregano and feel less pain in a few days.
That was an excellent overview! Thank you. xo
Thank you, dr!
Very interesting
My 2nd cousin has Munchausen syndrome and she has 3 kids. When she gave birth to her son she made him so ill he had to have an eating tube inserted into his stomach, she kept ripping it out so she could go to the hospital to get sympathy. The hospital ended up deciding to stop helping her because it wasted there time. She has almost killed her kids multiple times, we have tried multiple times to get Child Protection Services (CPS) to get involved and take the children away but they haven’t looked into it so we can’t do anything else.
My sister has this with her son. It has been very worrisome as a family. She ignores the doctor's orders for behavioral health. What can we do as a family?
Histrionic Personality Disorder
Not really. For someone to be diagnosed with personality disorder the three Ps must be Present; Problematic, pervasive and persistent. If someone has just suddenly started presenting to A&E describing various fabricated medical problems then this would indicate factitious disorder. Whereas someone with histrionic PD will often (not always obvious) have a long-standing history of trauma and abuse. Two completely different things as a whole.
I had a friend who faked a mental illness they call ‘mental illness’ (yeah, real creative.) and said they have ‘hallucinations’ (wich of course they used as a personality feature, and an OC instead of telling a doctor.) The person then spied on me with a friends account, called me a bitch, and told me to die.
Yes! Something that I will use to gaslight myself and saying I'm not depressed.
There’s a guy at work who fakes forgetfulness, and gets me to do his work, even asking for my help when I’m busy with other customers or busy doing other work. He’s not afraid to sit in front of customers for an hour acting like he struggling (embarrassingly slow), but he has not missed coming in to work or ever came in late, or ever got lost in his car in the way to work... so how can he only forget how to do a job he’s had for three years?
My mom has it, she is never healthy… and she honestly pisses me off and I can’t endure that at all bc its obvious that it is faking!! I mean if someone was shot by a gun wouldn’t react to the way she reacts to her fake illness
I really hope that there is someway to treat that! And the worst part she never accepts to be wrong she must always be right so it’s .. ugh Idk
U R Right Mam. Very needful Information. May Almighty keep U EVERGREEN 🍀, HAPPY, HEALTHY, ENERGETIC Forever for such a great service for the Painful people. Keep continue. .......
OMG!! I have a gf that has self diagnosed herself with Lyme disease. She has become a expert with it and all the crazy treatments she does because a medical Dr told her she doesn't have it. Has spent $1000's on all these alternative treatments. Certificates for alternative medicine and has her own web page and consults. I can't even listen to her anymore when she starts talking about her relapse, this has been going on for 5yrs or so. Before that it was something else, but it's all related to Lyme. UGH!!
your girlfriend may have chronic fatigue syndrome if she has been experiencing extreme fatigue for over six months, has unrefreshing sleep, experiences brain fog and feel sick or crashes after exerting herself. a lot of people think they have lyme when it's actually CFS. I hope she doesn't have it.
@@mmedeuxchevaux no thats not it. She has been at this for years with her different illnesses. Of course she is 64 but she has never spoken once that its menopausal. She just finished an extreme cleanse of Castro oil and coffee enemas. To relive livers stones she said she had. That went on for 7 days. She about the size of a twig.
Do these people ever convince themselves that they (or the imposed upon) are ill?
My ex had "few weeks to live" for a more than a year. That was not doubt the most traumatic year of my life. she was twice my age... honestly, sometimes I hate her
A mate from college had/has this. So manipulative.
My mom has mounchousins and it's been very difficult to not allow her make me have it