I am A Chinese, in Chinese concept, if let parents know to have a girlfriend or even bring a girl friend to meet parents, that is the prelude to getting married. When it comes to marriage, Chinese people think of it as a relationship between two families, not just two people. If you're thinking about getting married you need to work through the difficulties and understand each other. In China, there are some marriages where the parents don't approve, but over time they can understand and accept it. Good luck and most importantly, enjoy your study and life in China.
this is true... i watched one video on youtube about a chinese girl and african boy. the man shared his story, it was full of difficulties, the man then planned to go back home in african to spend sometime with his family and relatives then this chinese girl forced herself to travel with the man to african without her parents knowledge. after staying in africa i don't for how long, they went back to china then direct to the girls parent. the man explained everything together the girl. but then after a while the girl's parents belived in and trust and understand the man then eventually they were blessed for a marriage.
Wow that's a different culture than mine. In my country (Eswatini) they say, the farther you get your wife from, the better. So we grew up being encouraged to marry people that are not from our place, people that are different from us.
@@peggyclio1199 maybe, but also our people are very accepting of other cultures, they love different dynamics. They believe that the good from the man's culture plus the good from the woman's culture equals to a better marriage compared to a couple of the same culture.
@@peggyclio1199 growing up we were taught to marry from different regions/ cultures/ countries because there is a lot of good in other cultures/ way of doing things.
I am a black American woman. When I was 19 (I’m a lot older now) I met an Italian man who came to America. He didn’t speak much English but he was a quick learner. We dated for 3 years. His sister and I were good friends. She dated a Puerto Rican man for 2 years, and then they eloped and got married. Her father said he never wanted to see her again. My boyfriend was scared to tell his father about us. I couldn’t stay in that relationship. Fast forward, 2 years later I met a man who loved to take me to visit with his family and friends. He’s awesome. We got married. I was blessed to meet someone whose family and friends accepted & loved me.
This is really the dream and something I desire. A family that accepts you as theirs and yours does the same, the peace of mind it comes with us unmatched!!! 👏✨✨
I knew how much my Italian boyfriend loved his family, and how much he loved me. My family loved him too. He was tormented at how much his father did not want anything to do with his sister or her husband & their new born baby. It felt like there was a gray cloud hanging over our relationship. I did not want to live like that. It hurt me so much to break off. I am not giving love advice, but only sharing what I experienced. I’m sending you prayers, positive energy, and hugs. 🥰
If he doesn’t want and doesn’t dare to bring you to meet his family happily 🐁 then I don’t think he liked you enough 🏔 If he likes you enough, he would take so much risks 🐁 willing to risk his life to rescue you, etc.. 🏔
I love the fact that you used Black American...🙌👌❤️🔥not African American😊 We have white South Africans and they are not called European Africans. Well put...
At the end of the day she is not sleeping with his parents at night. She's sleeping with him. And his parents are not paying the bills. She and her man will be paying the bills. she should make sure to graduate from university and get a high paying job and then his parents will regret rejecting her for her color or race. She must show his parents that she is much more qualified than any Asian woman his parents could ever see their son with. She is an African queen. ❤
It's really hard when his family doesn't like you. Just keep being nice and hopefully they'll realize your a good daughter in law and can overcome their prejudice ❤️
I dated an Indian guy that was working in my country. I was so in love with him but of course he had to follow an arranged marriage. At the end, he said he couldn’t go against his family. It was heartbreaking. I’m still thinking he’s the best man I ever dated.
Look at yourself, you are smart and beautiful. I don't know how much you love China , but you must think of yourself and your future. Many Asian see us as inferior. We must keep our dignity and move forward. I am an African American who lived in 5 different countries. One thing I learned is that some people can't bring themselves to love us. A family must be united. I live in the US and although there is a lot of interracial marriages, most foreigners here want to marry Caucasians because they see them as superior. It's like the caste system exists here. I would sit down and write future pros and cons. We as black must hold our head high and stop living in places where we are not welcomed. Good luck!
Comment #2 : IMO one's three biggest life decisions to make are : 1. One's decision to worship God faithfully. 2. One's choice of their spouse. 3. One's level of education and/or trade skills. Life can be tough, One needs to make thoughtful decisions.
It can work if he is brave enough to stand up to his parents and tell them to accept her as his wife. If he cannot do this then no it will not work. Often the partner with the disapproving parent does not stand up to them and that causes the tension. He has to be willing to walk out and tell them he will not visit unless they respect her.
@theBooty28 This would be very important for sure. An interracial couple can only survive if they have genuine love for each other, because the road will be tuff and they'd have to put their love and God above all the attacks they may face from others. I'm a believer that love is color blind, and culture awareness is important too. If there is a doubt, it won't work.
Nah, i just think its beyond weird for people to listen to their parents about relationship things. Like i love my parents and respect them but it's your love life not theirs. I would advise the girl who sent you the letter to stay with him cause do you really think that his parents will ignore their (probably) only grandchildren just to avoid the other person? Thats beyond petty.. its heartless. I feel they would either put their racism aside (cause thats what it is if were being honest here) and come back into their child and grandchilds life. If not then its their loss. I also want to say Uche how often do you see your parents? I live in the same city as mine and i still dont see them enough for their dislike of a partner to mean anything to me or actually affect my life. To answer your other question yes love is enough, but only if you have the courage to choose it, if not youve let racism and hate win. Hope all goes well for you.🧡
I agree with the first commenter. If this is the universe will all will work out. Work on communicating with each other. If he is willing to pursue the relationship then stand in unity with him. It may be that you will build your lives together and over time his family will come around. Even if they don’t it’s their choice and you have no control over that . The universe will provide and bring in Chinese aunt and uncles to provide a foundation for the future child or children. You get one chance at this life cycle so make the best of it.
Love who you love, it’s none of their business who you love. It happens in every race and worse in interracial relationship. They have live their lives and you have to live your it their problem. I have experience dating people from my own country and from people of different race. So nah! Now I am so much older I realised I should not have allowed them to dictate who I dated. Following all my family advice and now resent the persons I married and have children with. I wish I was sad because I did what I wanted to instead hating the people I was with because parents and family approved of them more. I am in my 40s so don’t make the same mistake as long as you are happy every for a year, months or whatever. You will have experience true love and happiness once.
I knew how much my Italian boyfriend loved his family, and how much he loved me. My family loved him too. He was tormented at how much his father did not want anything to do with his sister or her husband & their new born baby. It felt like there was a gray cloud hanging over our relationship. I did not want to live like that. It hurt me so much to break off. I am not giving love advice, but only sharing what I experienced.
This has a very Romeo/Juliet kind of feel, & both their families having negative attitudes, each pissed at the other family. You for sure marry each other’s family. I think, unless you have already experienced boundaries with your own family, this is a big challenge for most traditional young adults.
There must be a level of maturity on there part to be independent. If their parents or for that matter other people around them are not on board with their happiness then go it alone without their permission and unnecessary ignorant opinions. Live your life for you or you will never become master of your own true self.
if the objection is just over ethnicity only, then, nobody is going to dictate our happiness. if they do not agree, it is their loss. my love would not be true love if it cannot even over sure simple objection. there is no need to stay with objectors, so out of sight is out of mind. simple objection because it is not due to religion or genetic compatibility or politics etc
It's unfortunate that the family of your boyfriend is prejudiced against you, but if the Chinese people really knew the origin of their history biblically, they came from. Kush is the same as we are. However, they aren't Christians. They mostly are Buddhist and wouldn't know are understand. The most important thing is the two of you, is your happiness. As you know, they believe in arrange marriage which I think that's HORRIBLE to be stuck with someone you had no choice in picking who you love verses being stuck with someone you don't want to be with. Don't they understand LOVE has no COLOR. They to .ove into the 21st century. Good luck and God bless you 🙏
Jehovah says in the bible that love covers all sins. Remember we are talking about a God that is the greatest force and presence in existence . Out of all the things he is and can be associated with, he says ...I am love !!! without that we would not still be alive today. We live for only one thing now, Agape the greatest love of all the four loves !!!
She should look at the Love Withstanding channel on TH-cam that should inform her of what her future might be like. A mature adult cannot just yield to their emotions alone and not use their brain .To "fall in love" is a decision like other life decisions and one's intellect should lead the way so that when these crushes or likes dissipate all that will remain is the decision that was made and it's consequences. If we made them from a sound place we should always be pleased with the final results in the end.
My ex boyfriend's mother literally came to my house and told me she didn't want us together. We were planning on getting married and planning to buy his childhood home. She than told me that she would make him choose between me and her. I actuality knew he'd chose me. But much like her, I felt like he would resent me for it later. I chose to be the bad guy. I lied and told him I cheated. An let him break up with me. His mother ended up dying 6 months later. I felt better about my choice because I wouldn't have wanted her to die alone without her son. Him to not have the chance to say goodbye. I felt the way she came at it, it was more than just me. It hurt because we were each others first love, but I loved him enough to hurt so he didn't have to later. I eventually told him years later because it changed him. I wanted him to know, he was never a bad boyfriend. He told me what I already knew, which he wished I hadn't taken his choice, bc he would have picked me. I told him imagine how you'd feel picking me and she passed away alone. Could you have still loved me. She didn't care about his happiness, his mom was treating him like he was her man. Now my other ex his mom didn't like me bc I wasn't white while his dad didn't like me bc I was fat but my intelligence won him over lol but his mom and sister ended up pushing me away from that. I later learned, they were actually trying to save my life. They knew the type of man he really was.
M not willing to put myself in a situation where me and my kids are struggling to be accepted because of the skin color. Let me tell you you can move in with your interracial person for love, and he/ she can choose to ignore the family but the family will always win and that relationship will not end up well trust me. Interracial relationships are complicated.
My dad's family didn't like my mom at all and they're BOTH Haitian!! Its just that they had high standards because our family name was a really big deal in the region of Haiti they came from . They also thought my mom wasn't smart and they thought she was too flashy or vain. But my dad held firm! He said that he made up his mind and he loved my mother and wasn't going to give in for such petty reasons. He stood up for their love and said he wasn't going to change his mind. They have now been married for 30+ years. If my man stands up for our love then I would stay with him. What matters is our relationship and building a family together. If he caves in...then I would leave right then.
You are from Haiti, some communities or culture don’t really have certain traditions or family protocols. You come from a community where a man/ woman can e disobey their families on certain issues….
I have a Chinese girl friend and she was in LOVE with this black guy at her Church, and they wanted to get married. Her parents said NO because the guy was black, and what would other people say? They also emphasized that her life would be difficult because she is with s black guy and have black/Chinese children. Boy! She was crying for this man. She eventually left him, but I knew that that was it for her. She would never get married again. I feel like she just gave up. That was over 10 years ago.
Her parents just killed her life, now she is face with the real difficulty which is being alone. If she is the only child, they should be ready for a difficult life as well, no one to take care of them. So to speak 🤷🏾♀️
Giiiiiiirl I never clicked so fast ! Always excited to see your uploads lol 😂 That was the same case with me and my Korean bf , his mum was against black babies ! She preferred he married a white foreigner or Korean girl . He did just that married a white American . Fast forward 5 years he contacts me , apologises for not having stood up for our love . He tells me he didn’t talk to his mum for years because he blames his mum , he asked me if I would marry him if he divorces his wife ! So No love doesn’t conquer all because family plays a big role and it’s important they approve it . Like she said her children need both sets of grandparents however I have seen some grandparents eventually come around and accept the relationship . So it’s really Upto the people in the relationship to measure if they can withstand all that nonsense . For me I move , it’s my partners role to make sure the family is aware of me and accepts the relationship way ahead of meeting up !
@@ucheobuekwe right !!! It was the disrespect for me 🤣🤣 like honestly ! Dodged a bullet there, who knows what he would have been doing behind my back if I ever married him . Feel sorry for his wife though 💝
@@ucheobuekwe after two years i need everyone from their house to get tshirt printed to say im their daughter inlaw lol im not prepared to date two yers witout introducing family especially interacial streets. two years
I don't understand the logic behind parents deciding who their children's spends their liVeS with. Issues like this make me very angry o. If I ever bring somebody home and my parents say they don't like this person and they then threaten to disown me, I might disown them before they disown me o. Please follow the person that gives you peace. You will be miserable if you settle down with somebody who you don't connect with. With time, the parents will come around and make peace. They just need time to be use to the person their children chooses to be with. .
See this statement you pointed out “Follow the person that gives you peace” It’s so important, Wish I understood this “peace” thing well when I was younger, now I understand how important it is to be with someone who feel at peace with because life is already hard enough 😩
As someone who is of African decent and married to a Chinese woman , I’ll say that at first everyone on both sides had questions but my family was more opened to the idea , and tbh since she was in my country we hid it from her family until things was right . When we family told her parents they were disappointed that she kept it from them … her family were welcoming and supportive of us , they can’t wait for us to come to China and be a family .. also our baby girl is there world
I have been in your position and I know how it feels in such a confusing and difficult situation. All of us are different including parents. Couples are torn apart because of parent's differences in culture, religion, nationality, race, colour .... My opinion is, love for each other should be valued and upheld as the highest priority. At the end of the day, none of the relatives will be there 24/7 to support your relationship and your family. It's just the two of you. As for me, I choose to move out and away and hope that time will allow parents from both sides to put aside the biases and prejudices. Let the love of two persons to be light and example that shines through. That's all I can think of. Wishing that everything works out well eventually in your situation. God bless.
I HAVE TO SAY AS A BLACK WOMAN WHO LOVES DIFFERENT CULTURES AND RACES. I'M SO DISAPPOINTED TO HEAR THESE KINDS OF STORIES. LATELY, I HAVE FOUND MYSELF LOVING CHINESE AND KOREAN MUSIC AND SHOWS. SO WHEN I HEAR THEY WON'T LIKE ME BECAUSE I'M BLACK WOW. I WILL NOT PUT ALL ASIAN PEOPLE IN THE SAME BUCKET BUT STILL WHAT THE HELL. I COULD SAY THIS MUCH ANY ASIAN MAN WOULD BE LUCKY TO HAVE SOMEONE LIKE ME TO COME HOME TO. I'M SO PROUD TO BE A BLACK WOMAN AND I WOULD NOT LET ANYONE IGNORANCE CHANGE MY LOVE FOR GOD BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE. I WILL KEEP LOVING MY CHINESE MUSIC AND DRAMA ESPECIALLY KUNGFU ONES. LOVE IT AND YES I REALLY LOVE ME.
Love does not cover all things, what if 10 years down the line the man leaves you and the kids to go back to his parents? Truth is I may be in love with you but if your family does not accept me I won't force it.
@@ucheobuekwe Exactly, maybe it is because here in Nigeria we believe that when a woman gets married she is not just marrying the man but also marrying his family too, I can't be with someone whose family would make my life a living hell especially not because of the colour of my skin. Nobody chose the race they were born into, no one chose their skin colour, people shouldn't be judged based on those things because they are out of their control, rather the content of a person's character is more important. I wish the young lady all the best and may God help her make the right choice.
I say end the relationship because I was dating woman parents that hated me because I had a learning disability. Behind my back they use too say I “slow and nothing I was” I was heartbroken and hurted. It takes years to recover and I had to go to therapy to recover. But now I forgive them and over it!!! However, ultimately it up to her!!! Uche Obuekwe is right once she get married not long up to her and the boyfriend!! His family will be your family. And be more issues/complications. Please don’t get me wrong I believe if his or she is treating you right and both of you all is happy. Why not be in a relationship. But if his family don’t accept you it not a good feeling and she going to get more issues and complications!!!! I am not going to say good luck but Godspeed it more safe journey!!!!
I would advice you to leave the relationship because if his parents don't want you , with time the son will also change.trust me,i have seen many relationships failing because of that.
The parents will eventually pass on to after life with their objections if they fail to make peace with their reality. **Having said that, Uche, "ekerie gi na China, ihuru ihe oke mere azu di na ngiga, o ihe anyi ga emegi...Lol.
Real Love bears all trials, believes in all things good, hopes in all things good, and endures all things that oppose it. Real love, True Love never fails...but people do. The simple fact is that most people are not taught to love unselfishly and therefore are accustomed to loving until whatever happens. Most people don't even know how to love but rather.. they like or are infatuated with a person but mistake these things with love. It's unfortunate how common it is for people to use infatuation, admiration, & liking interchangeably with love. They are NOT the same LOL
It’s a lie, every civilization, culture or tradition are not the same. Some people don’t have any culture or tradition they look up to in forming a family…. Be careful who you date and not to be a problem to your family. Mariage in my African culture is between two families not just between man and woman.
Being confident, As a Chinese, I am blind in people's color of skin, I feel u r beautiful, so if his parents refuse maybe u find another one who is better
One of the best resources for stories about interracial marriages between Asians and non-Asians is KDOC TV. I have seen many Korean parents who temporarily disowned their own kids, sometimes for years, admit that they were wrong on camera. Many stories are the same. They often say things like “when they had kids I came around” or “when I saw how they were together I came around. I watched one where this black guy married a Korean woman, the dad refused to come to the wedding. 7 years later the dad and his son-in-law were literally holding hands and walking through a park, a rare sight. My opinion based on this is that as long as the new spouse/partner has a good heart, there is opportunity. Sometimes I am angry when I see how hard that the new husband (it’s more often a foreign man that parents are upset about) will work to get approval. I feel like they should be angry with their new in-laws for being so prejudiced. But I am impressed with how everyone works together to build a new bond.
This is such a sad situation but then i hope she figures it out... inter racial marriages are hard enough honestly i wouldn't add more by marrying someone whose parents don't approve
A lot of Asian parents don’t want their kids marrying black people. I mentioned this before in a previous video you posted. They don’t want black grandkids! And most of the time their kids give in to the parents. Dating Asian men is a losing battle most of the time.
Not with the rich, they will marry to continue retaining their wealth plus expen too. Yes if the love is very strong. Don't worry if he is yours he will 100 % come back to u. Plus his parents will accept u too. My sis married an Indian ( not rich) n my parents were totally against to the extent of cutting her inheritance but at the end they got married n got inheritance too. Marry him only if he 100% want u n tell his parents they have no choice. I have a girlfriend, a divorcee with a kid plus older then the guy 3yrs. His mum was a 100% no no. But he was so sure on what he wants. Ended very well. She gave birth to 2 more. N the mil was very happy , the husband accepted friend 's daughter totally as part of the family. If u do marry him please forgive his parents n treat them nice as they did not know u well. Don't take their son away totally. Understand that they want the best for their son n misjudged u. Don't feel sad time will tell whether he is yours. Wish u the best.
If the parents do not accept them, you can not marry them because in the end the kids would be hurt. Family should be family not broken before even starts!
It dépend the Mindset of the Person and the strenght of the Love. If you are prepared mentaly to pass above all the obstacle and if your love is strong you have to follow your Heart. But if you don't have a strong Mindset, and the Others have a Big influence on you, It Will be difficult. It depend your strenght. But the Life is very surprising Thing everything can Happen.
U speak very wise eventhough u are young. M sure u gave it a deep thought. I think every parents wish their children marry their own kind cos they think its easy to understand n communicate. To me, I think both side must show their parents what they really want . I m from Malaysia n we have alot of inter marriages. My father will tell me to ask my sis to drop her white husband n come back!!! N he also told another sis that he will disown her if she marries her present Indian husband. Well, nobody listen not even my 2 brothers with white wifes. I also want to tell u Africans that i think the Chinese culture n the African's are quite similar - from watching u people n my very good Zambian friends who i knew 50yrs back!!! My parents finally ok cos they don't want to spoil their children's happiness n get blamed. Just think so many millions in this world n yet we seem to love so few!!! Good luck n best wishes to all those lovers out there.
I'm an older person and I like your content and this topic is a close one to my heart because I am also in an interracial relationship and as you started with love conquers all and if both parties involved love each other and stand their ground no parent no one can break that and with God involved you two put heads together because at the end of the day all who are against love are just being controlled by fear the fear of what if and that's a terrible place to be.The race and colour don't matter because people are people everywhere and the thing we see as a difference between us really is stuff used to spice up the relationship you know learning about each other's childhood, friends, experiences,and yes even family.Love should be allowed to grow and bloom and the little I know of the Chinese culture they can be a bit much but this younger generation is changing and there are ways around it, because I am a living example of seeing these same parents and others who were against are very proud now and the very stubborn ones who refuse to soften up you just got to find a way to love them from far.♥️♥️♥️💞💞💞
That's typical of some Asian parents, I met a few Asian parents that don't like me. And I'm Asian and same ethnic group as the parents . If you both prove that its love and not just crushing. Usually the parents will accept it , or learn to accept it. If you don't want to marry that person just because of what the parents think or say .then you don't really love that person. And it makes the parents correct about there opinions. Of it being a bad idea of marriage.
I appreciate your point of view! You want a spiritual love regardless status,race,and wealth. Life is a journey and every Journey is authentically different! LIVE YOUR LIFE! May you find what you seek!
To the person that wrote in: people are people they believe what they have been taught. You could be the nicest person in the world but his parents have been brainwashed. If you love him and he truly loves you he has to come to terms with who his real friends are and believe me he is not going to like it. All around the world people have been spreading lies and roomer about the Africa Americans and Africans that what it has always been about. Honey just be you and do not fake anything and he also better realize what is about to happen in his life. If his parents really love him they will come around. These people of all color attend church or whatever. But I have come to know the hate breeds diseases all throughout the human body. Oh and guess what know one wants to die. It is only a skin color difference and culture difference. If they and any other person strongly feels all this hate against people of color than people don't sell in their communities and stay out of their neighborhoods. God is Love how could anyone call themselves a Christian or service God with all this hate in your heart. Forgiveness is key. Try to get to know someone before you judge them. To the young man involved with the Africa n lady your parents are not going to live forever you need to live your life the way you want to. Facts you pay your own bills ,etc. So by all means love who you want to love. If you ever make any kind of mistakes you have to answer know one else and vice versa, ok peace and love to all of you living your best life. Amen..
Welcome to my world. I feel for you. Sadly although love can conquer all, the journey through the maze of racism is never ending and painful. Your questions really hit home. As a child I was rejected by white grandparents. You have to be in credibly strong and supportive to your children if you choose to go on with the relationship. But hey, love conquers all. ❤
I think you and Joe need to sit down and face each other in conversation of the pros and cons of marriage , children, and acceptance on all levels for every stage of life. Is love the be all end all for the happiness of your relationship? There is a lot to consider. Would he be willing to move to Nigeria? Do you want to reside in China? What kind of social life would you expect to have? The relationship is 2 years old. Better to know and understand before moving any further towards marriage and family.
My understanding of the world comes from a "black" American or descendants of the "enslaved." Therefore, I've had encounters over decades of a sampling of people from around the globe. Marrying someone or even being involved with someone outside of what you would consider your culture is something to consider. Other than this...: Depending on your status, your education level, and the amount of money you and your family have could play a role in your decision-making; like it or not, marriage could also be seen as a business arrangement, especially since you're most likely to have children. With all things being nearly equal or not too far apart with education and finances, I suggest you get a contractual agreement that you sign. Otherwise, you could end up, like so many people, robbed and poisoned against your ex, thanks to the lawyers and supporters who deprive the family of its assets through the practice of family law. The world seems in turmoil, where anything can and will happen. Being aware, above all, that a family needs stability and ending this stability places all you have at risk. Finally, it's good to want to believe that "race" doesn't matter, but power and resources were divided by exploitation based on the concept of "race." Therefore, the focus you'll find on your appearance and your children's appearance will shock you, especially if you're not prepared. With the white "race" (whatever this means to you) assumed to be number one, the African "blacks" are considered to be at the bottom of preference. This was established in the 18th century by law and in application. Race will be a problem because of the investment in racism as a political tool to extract goods and resources, which is embedded in many institutions and systems globally. Thank you, and good luck.
The world is fast changing and there are lots of interracial mariages. Love some times make wonderful things happen. I am from Igbo and married to white Europeen over 35 years ago. I was immediatly wellcome and accepted to his family. I prefer white to Chinese though because they are more open to learn and accept other culture than Chinese. Good luck to you.
Dont marry someone whose parents dont absolutely love you. You need to be family. The rejection will never be less painful. They will treat you like their grandkids mother - not their daughter😢😢
Marriage is about the two people that are married and has God in the middle. The family is on the outside of that union. In my opinion if they feel that they want to spend the rest of their lives with each other and they both are ready to fully unconditionally love each other then they should go ahead and get married. Love isn't about race, culture or creed....Love is simply about Love.
I have a Chinese boyfriend, we’ve been together for almost 2 months and he’s afraid to tell his parents about me because I’m black and his parents want him to marry a Chinese girl 😔
the question is: is the rejection of in- laws and others worth your relationship, or can you not live without each other. if you can’t live without each other ( honestly) your question is answered.
It’s ashamed from all viewpoints if 2 ppl love each other and they going to have a wonderful life together the parents or the old ways being afraid of differents special when they dnt have a reason why shouldn’t be or getting married cause u say so and to say they have nothing to due with u anymore that means those parents have no heart ❤️ and the world has changed longs us ppl in this world travel into each other space it will happen even when slavey happens they mix love or world traverses or ppl goes to college or ect. It’s going to happen so they have to get over it true love is true love
Don’t just look at the face value, what is within matter the most dear. What you see on social media and movies isn’t really just watch for your entertainment and keep it moving. If you find the Asian man that is well suited for you, good and well but remember the face value is temporary. This is my opinion, you don’t have to take any of it.
Lmao, they ain't imo. And it doesnt make sense to be thirsting openly for men who dont do the same for you. Black women are just as beautiful as other women. We do our hair in amazing styles no one else does, look marvelous in bright colors. How many videos do you see praising our beauty? There we go.
In the bible samson's parents said no and he went ahead and did it still and he end up bad,God always tell parents things So in the futrue you will see why.
Je suis chinois et je me suis marié à une femme de couleur ( noir) . J'ai eu 4 enfants et on a vecu 48 ans ensemble ( elle nous a quitté pour rejoindre le seigneur). Beaucoup d'obstacles mais on s'en fiche, après 5 années ensemble on a été accepté. Alors si il t'aime c'est à lui d' affronter sa famille comme moi . Et vous êtes belle et intelligente,tu continues tes études, tu trouveras un époux digne de ton amour.
Love does conquer, if it is is indeed love. The question which must be asked is this. Is the objection based on vibes or constructive stuff? Or is it based on the fact of blacks having to "prove" their worth. From the little I have seen of you, you are quality and it's they who should be trying to impress you.
what is important is the person's character, personality, compatibility and values, not the ethnicity.... sadly everywhere in the world people tend to be tribal, but fortunately the barriers are slowly coming down🙏🙏
You should really follow on what is REALLY going in Africa as well. These Chinese are over exploiting children in Malawi and propaganding them as animals. Also other parts of Africa these Asians that come there don't want to understand the people and respect the people and their heritage. So if I were you. I would see this as blessing in disguise. These people don't look and see us as human beings with religion, culture, and heritage that runs much deeper than theirs. I pray that you find your blessed one.
Yes it is incredibly disheartening what they are doing in Africa. I hope the African government steps up and punishes such people accordingly and possible have been deported as their actions are inexcusable. That being said, a few of them are actually nice and genuine people and I have one or two of such as friends. 😊
When you have an Asian family 🐁 you will know what it means by your family will never ever leave you 🐁 You will know what it means by Asian families and relatives gathering.. 🐁 you will have a family and you will love it so much and you will feel that you will always have someone.. and never ever be lonely 🪳
I don't think she should give up without even trying to win them over, most people have unconscious bias until they know better. Anyway good luck to her
I think all SOME chines parents colour are important To them.. and they more Like chines girl To their son.im just talking reality what We see right as My observation. but if im situation of the chines guy i will stand up what i really love...💪and If im Your situation i ask what the really guy want To do of Your realationship and givea little time To think you both then do final plan.. If you feel not really work then its time To cut and find another loved one.
Jehovah God and his son loves us and we must thank him and his faithful son Jesus extended to us, even under pain and torture and a cruel death !!! We as humans are taught that love is something that is extended in this world. Not true, Lust is what this world is about.... and that will past !!!
Love is not about working hard and striving...Love edifies...It lies between two hearts and the family members...That's y people end up regretting and suffering in a relationship they didn't want....Pay a deaf ear to negativity... Love has to be of joy, happiness, and not sorrow ....Never , with this God I believed.
Love is good, it's great but not enough for marriage/lifetime commitment. And like in everything, you need to know what risks, the possible outcomes and consequences of such risks and make your decision. For situations like this, going ahead with the relationship and even marriage faces the risk of never ever being accepted by the family, the risk of this wearing the guy himself down and out overtime. Consequences are divorce and single-motherhood. But again there are also possibilities of it working out eventually and happiness ever after. No one can predict final outcomes. You need to review the risks, the possible consequences of such risks and the sunshine flip side. You decide. But Uche, something tells me it's you actually in the situation. Shine ya eye. Asanwa make dem no mess you up. Peace
I have experienced something like this but trust me if your partner loves you he can make his family know how good you are. With time I think they'll accept you but if they insist pls quiet
Most of you dont know this. But if you are black be very careful dating any man outside your country. Most nonblack men think black women are easy. Never sleep with men casually. Ever. If they are not serious about you they should not touch you. No one should be wasting their time with anyone who wont introduce them to their parents.
Hi Uche, I enjoy your videos very much. Can I ask a unrelated question tho? I recently heard that it's impossible for people from a few African countries to open a bank account in China because these countries are blacklisted. I wonder if you know anything about it? Thanks.
It’s up to them because in the end, no matter what advice is given, each adult in the relationship is responsible for their own decisions. They should not resent their partners if they stay and have regrets or their parents if they split now or later and have regrets. They are not children. They should talk it out and think it through consider all the aspects then decide each for themselves what it is they want. There will be tears, heartbreak, regret, and anger for someone no matter what they choose. The parents MAY come around, they may not, can he accept and live with the consequences?
My values/beliefs/limits/boundaries versus _everyone else._ Always tricky and it's up to what you're willing to accept going forward with your love choices.
I am A Chinese, in Chinese concept, if let parents know to have a girlfriend or even bring a girl friend to meet parents, that is the prelude to getting married. When it comes to marriage, Chinese people think of it as a relationship between two families, not just two people. If you're thinking about getting married you need to work through the difficulties and understand each other. In China, there are some marriages where the parents don't approve, but over time they can understand and accept it. Good luck and most importantly, enjoy your study and life in China.
this is true... i watched one video on youtube about a chinese girl and african boy. the man shared his story, it was full of difficulties, the man then planned to go back home in african to spend sometime with his family and relatives then this chinese girl forced herself to travel with the man to african without her parents knowledge. after staying in africa i don't for how long, they went back to china then direct to the girls parent. the man explained everything together the girl. but then after a while the girl's parents belived in and trust and understand the man then eventually they were blessed for a marriage.
Wow that's a different culture than mine. In my country (Eswatini) they say, the farther you get your wife from, the better. So we grew up being encouraged to marry people that are not from our place, people that are different from us.
@@perfectiongirl6465 because of the genes maybe
@@peggyclio1199 maybe, but also our people are very accepting of other cultures, they love different dynamics. They believe that the good from the man's culture plus the good from the woman's culture equals to a better marriage compared to a couple of the same culture.
@@peggyclio1199 growing up we were taught to marry from different regions/ cultures/ countries because there is a lot of good in other cultures/ way of doing things.
I am a black American woman. When I was 19 (I’m a lot older now) I met an Italian man who came to America. He didn’t speak much English but he was a quick learner. We dated for 3 years. His sister and I were good friends. She dated a Puerto Rican man for 2 years, and then they eloped and got married. Her father said he never wanted to see her again. My boyfriend was scared to tell his father about us. I couldn’t stay in that relationship. Fast forward, 2 years later I met a man who loved to take me to visit with his family and friends. He’s awesome. We got married. I was blessed to meet someone whose family and friends accepted & loved me.
This is really the dream and something I desire.
A family that accepts you as theirs and yours does the same, the peace of mind it comes with us unmatched!!! 👏✨✨
I knew how much my Italian boyfriend loved his family, and how much he loved me. My family loved him too. He was tormented at how much his father did not want anything to do with his sister or her husband & their new born baby. It felt like there was a gray cloud hanging over our relationship. I did not want to live like that. It hurt me so much to break off. I am not giving love advice, but only sharing what I experienced. I’m sending you prayers, positive energy, and hugs. 🥰
If he doesn’t want and doesn’t dare to bring you to meet his family happily 🐁 then I don’t think he liked you enough 🏔
If he likes you enough, he would take so much risks 🐁 willing to risk his life to rescue you, etc.. 🏔
I love the fact that you used Black American...🙌👌❤️🔥not African American😊
We have white South Africans and they are not called European Africans.
Well put...
At the end of the day she is not sleeping with his parents at night. She's sleeping with him. And his parents are not paying the bills. She and her man will be paying the bills. she should make sure to graduate from university and get a high paying job and then his parents will regret rejecting her for her color or race. She must show his parents that she is much more qualified than any Asian woman his parents could ever see their son with. She is an African queen. ❤
It's really hard when his family doesn't like you. Just keep being nice and hopefully they'll realize your a good daughter in law and can overcome their prejudice ❤️
I can’t just understand what a black African girl doing with a Chinese man😮😮
I can understand a Chinese woman going for a black man.
@dubemellit2932 Asian men are attractive too, not just black men. I've heard they're really attentive and have very good manners.
I dated an Indian guy that was working in my country. I was so in love with him but of course he had to follow an arranged marriage. At the end, he said he couldn’t go against his family. It was heartbreaking. I’m still thinking he’s the best man I ever dated.
He was a coward.
Asian people don’t introduce their partner to their parents unless they’re thinking of marrying them. Same with my culture
Look at yourself, you are smart and beautiful. I don't know how much you love China , but you must think of yourself and your future. Many Asian see us as inferior. We must keep our dignity and move forward. I am an African American who lived in 5 different countries. One thing I learned is that some people can't bring themselves to love us. A family must be united. I live in the US and although there is a lot of interracial marriages, most foreigners here want to marry Caucasians because they see them as superior. It's like the caste system exists here. I would sit down and write future pros and cons. We as black must hold our head high and stop living in places where we are not welcomed. Good luck!
Comment #2 :
IMO one's three biggest life decisions to make are :
1. One's decision to worship God faithfully.
2. One's choice of their spouse.
3. One's level of education and/or trade
skills.
Life can be tough, One needs to make thoughtful decisions.
It can work if he is brave enough to stand up to his parents and tell them to accept her as his wife. If he cannot do this then no it will not work. Often the partner with the disapproving parent does not stand up to them and that causes the tension. He has to be willing to walk out and tell them he will not visit unless they respect her.
@theBooty28
This would be very important for sure. An interracial couple can only survive if they have genuine love for each other, because the road will be tuff and they'd have to put their love and God above all the attacks they may face from others.
I'm a believer that love is color blind, and culture awareness is important too.
If there is a doubt, it won't work.
Nah, i just think its beyond weird for people to listen to their parents about relationship things. Like i love my parents and respect them but it's your love life not theirs. I would advise the girl who sent you the letter to stay with him cause do you really think that his parents will ignore their (probably) only grandchildren just to avoid the other person? Thats beyond petty.. its heartless. I feel they would either put their racism aside (cause thats what it is if were being honest here) and come back into their child and grandchilds life. If not then its their loss. I also want to say Uche how often do you see your parents? I live in the same city as mine and i still dont see them enough for their dislike of a partner to mean anything to me or actually affect my life. To answer your other question yes love is enough, but only if you have the courage to choose it, if not youve let racism and hate win. Hope all goes well for you.🧡
Racism is everywhere. even in india
Undoubtedly.
I agree with the first commenter. If this is the universe will all will work out. Work on communicating with each other. If he is willing to pursue the relationship then stand in unity with him. It may be that you will build your lives together and over time his family will come around. Even if they don’t it’s their choice and you have no control over that . The universe will provide and bring in Chinese aunt and uncles to provide a foundation for the future child or children. You get one chance at this life cycle so make the best of it.
Love who you love, it’s none of their business who you love.
It happens in every race and worse in interracial relationship.
They have live their lives and you have to live your it their problem.
I have experience dating people from my own country and from people of different race.
So nah! Now I am so much older I realised I should not have allowed them to dictate who I dated. Following all my family advice and now resent the persons I married and have children with.
I wish I was sad because I did what I wanted to instead hating the people I was with because parents and family approved of them more.
I am in my 40s so don’t make the same mistake as long as you are happy every for a year, months or whatever.
You will have experience true love and happiness once.
9:20 Yep tell the truth in that particular situation is harder to say no if you love the person
To be honest I don't believe in love conquers all .I mean love is not the only important thing in a relationship
I knew how much my Italian boyfriend loved his family, and how much he loved me. My family loved him too. He was tormented at how much his father did not want anything to do with his sister or her husband & their new born baby. It felt like there was a gray cloud hanging over our relationship. I did not want to live like that. It hurt me so much to break off. I am not giving love advice, but only sharing what I experienced.
This has a very Romeo/Juliet kind of feel, & both their families having negative attitudes, each pissed at the other family. You for sure marry each other’s family. I think, unless you have already experienced boundaries with your own family, this is a big challenge for most traditional young adults.
Hey 👋 Uche having watching your videos so well and i noticed you speak a very good Igbo language what part of Nigeria are you from
There must be a level of maturity on there part to be independent. If their parents or for that matter other people around them are not on board with their happiness then go it alone without their permission and unnecessary ignorant opinions. Live your life for you or you will never become master of your own true self.
if the objection is just over ethnicity only, then, nobody is going to dictate our happiness. if they do not agree, it is their loss. my love would not be true love if it cannot even over sure simple objection. there is no need to stay with objectors, so out of sight is out of mind. simple objection because it is not due to religion or genetic compatibility or politics etc
I clicked the link and I remember him you guys are so cute, unfortunate that it didn’t work out because of family
I doubt you watched the video.
Try and watch first before commenting 😉❤️
I did watch the video :) both maybe it wasn’t clear because you were telling your experience with dating and that of a subbie in one video
Somalis are all about tribes too, I think our parents just want us to stay single
Haha it’s the complete opposite oh, especially for African parents.
It’s so sad tribe is such a huge issue in 2022
It's unfortunate that the family of your boyfriend is prejudiced against you, but if the Chinese people really knew the origin of their history biblically, they came from. Kush is the same as we are. However, they aren't Christians. They mostly are Buddhist and wouldn't know are understand. The most important thing is the two of you, is your happiness. As you know, they believe in arrange marriage which I think that's HORRIBLE to be stuck with someone you had no choice in picking who you love verses being stuck with someone you don't want to be with. Don't they understand LOVE has no COLOR. They to .ove into the 21st century. Good luck and God bless you 🙏
I'm from india.
Hello.. hope to visit India someday,
Jehovah says in the bible that love covers all sins. Remember we are talking about a God that is the greatest force and presence in existence . Out of all the things he is and can be associated with, he says ...I am love !!! without that we would not still be alive today. We live for only one thing now, Agape the greatest love of all the four loves !!!
What took you to China? Do you have University Education in China? Is Tubing youronly job? Tell us about you.
She should look at the Love Withstanding channel on TH-cam that should inform her of what her future might be like. A mature adult cannot just yield to their emotions alone and not use their brain .To "fall in love" is a decision like other life decisions and one's intellect should lead the way so that when these crushes or likes dissipate all that will remain is the decision that was made and it's consequences. If we made them from a sound place we should always be pleased with the final results in the end.
Hmm. I do agree love is often times a decision but sometimes making that decision or deciding not to “love” someone anymore is extremely hard.
My ex boyfriend's mother literally came to my house and told me she didn't want us together. We were planning on getting married and planning to buy his childhood home. She than told me that she would make him choose between me and her. I actuality knew he'd chose me. But much like her, I felt like he would resent me for it later. I chose to be the bad guy. I lied and told him I cheated. An let him break up with me. His mother ended up dying 6 months later. I felt better about my choice because I wouldn't have wanted her to die alone without her son. Him to not have the chance to say goodbye. I felt the way she came at it, it was more than just me. It hurt because we were each others first love, but I loved him enough to hurt so he didn't have to later. I eventually told him years later because it changed him. I wanted him to know, he was never a bad boyfriend. He told me what I already knew, which he wished I hadn't taken his choice, bc he would have picked me. I told him imagine how you'd feel picking me and she passed away alone. Could you have still loved me. She didn't care about his happiness, his mom was treating him like he was her man. Now my other ex his mom didn't like me bc I wasn't white while his dad didn't like me bc I was fat but my intelligence won him over lol but his mom and sister ended up pushing me away from that. I later learned, they were actually trying to save my life. They knew the type of man he really was.
My saying is what would Jesus say!,?
I’m not sure what do you think Jesus will say?
You video is great but pls you look beautiful naturally than applying so much makeup 💄🙂
She can please herself and do what she wants with HER OWN FACE.
M not willing to put myself in a situation where me and my kids are struggling to be accepted because of the skin color. Let me tell you you can move in with your interracial person for love, and he/ she can choose to ignore the family but the family will always win and that relationship will not end up well trust me. Interracial relationships are complicated.
My dad's family didn't like my mom at all and they're BOTH Haitian!! Its just that they had high standards because our family name was a really big deal in the region of Haiti they came from . They also thought my mom wasn't smart and they thought she was too flashy or vain. But my dad held firm! He said that he made up his mind and he loved my mother and wasn't going to give in for such petty reasons. He stood up for their love and said he wasn't going to change his mind. They have now been married for 30+ years. If my man stands up for our love then I would stay with him. What matters is our relationship and building a family together. If he caves in...then I would leave right then.
Agree 💯
You are from Haiti, some communities or culture don’t really have certain traditions or family protocols.
You come from a community where a man/ woman can e disobey their families on certain issues….
I have a Chinese girl friend and she was in LOVE with this black guy at her Church, and they wanted to get married. Her parents said NO because the guy was black, and what would other people say? They also emphasized that her life would be difficult because she is with s black guy and have black/Chinese children. Boy! She was crying for this man. She eventually left him, but I knew that that was it for her. She would never get married again. I feel like she just gave up. That was over 10 years ago.
Those parents act like if the black man was Barack Obama for eg they wouldn’t let her marry him
@Douluo dalu She's still my friend. She's been doing Christian mission work here and there with some minimum wage work in between.
Oh wow that’s sad😭😭, so she hasn’t found someone else up until now?
I believe we can find love in different people in this our lifetime.
Her parents just killed her life, now she is face with the real difficulty which is being alone. If she is the only child, they should be ready for a difficult life as well, no one to take care of them. So to speak 🤷🏾♀️
@@juliuspresley9982 Huh? Where in the Bible did God condemn mixed marriage please?
Giiiiiiirl I never clicked so fast ! Always excited to see your uploads lol 😂 That was the same case with me and my Korean bf , his mum was against black babies ! She preferred he married a white foreigner or Korean girl . He did just that married a white American . Fast forward 5 years he contacts me , apologises for not having stood up for our love . He tells me he didn’t talk to his mum for years because he blames his mum , he asked me if I would marry him if he divorces his wife !
So No love doesn’t conquer all because family plays a big role and it’s important they approve it . Like she said her children need both sets of grandparents however I have seen some grandparents eventually come around and accept the relationship . So it’s really Upto the people in the relationship to measure if they can withstand all that nonsense . For me I move , it’s my partners role to make sure the family is aware of me and accepts the relationship way ahead of meeting up !
Oh wow! Not him contacting you years later and saying he’ll divorce his wife if you agree to marry him? Phew!😮💨😄
@@ucheobuekwe right !!! It was the disrespect for me 🤣🤣 like honestly ! Dodged a bullet there, who knows what he would have been doing behind my back if I ever married him . Feel sorry for his wife though 💝
@@Tianamira kötü bir durum oysa ben siyahi bir kadinla evlenmek istiyorum
@@spartaboy169 Where are you from? Haha
@@Carolina-cb6hp zero dignity.
I feel the boyfriend set her up. Two years no introduction to the parents ummm. The parents are racist run girl run
Lool. It depends on a lot of things.
Sometimes you aren’t sure of someone from the start.
@@ucheobuekwe after two years i need everyone from their house to get tshirt printed to say im their daughter inlaw lol im not prepared to date two yers witout introducing family especially interacial streets. two years
@@misscidella 🤣🤣 @ shirt.. girl please 😂
@@misscidella ok shebi it's tshirt u need ,we can do that
@@misscidella Exactly. I cant imagine how naive black people are.
I don't understand the logic behind parents deciding who their children's spends their liVeS with. Issues like this make me very angry o. If I ever bring somebody home and my parents say they don't like this person and they then threaten to disown me, I might disown them before they disown me o.
Please follow the person that gives you peace. You will be miserable if you settle down with somebody who you don't connect with. With time, the parents will come around and make peace. They just need time to be use to the person their children chooses to be with. .
See this statement you pointed out
“Follow the person that gives you peace”
It’s so important, Wish I understood this “peace” thing well when I was younger, now I understand how important it is to be with someone who feel at peace with because life is already hard enough 😩
@@ucheobuekwe Yes absolutely.
As someone who is of African decent and married to a Chinese woman , I’ll say that at first everyone on both sides had questions but my family was more opened to the idea , and tbh since she was in my country we hid it from her family until things was right . When we family told her parents they were disappointed that she kept it from them … her family were welcoming and supportive of us , they can’t wait for us to come to China and be a family .. also our baby girl is there world
I have been in your position and I know how it feels in such a confusing and difficult situation. All of us are different including parents. Couples are torn apart because of parent's differences in culture, religion, nationality, race, colour ....
My opinion is, love for each other should be valued and upheld as the highest priority. At the end of the day, none of the relatives will be there 24/7 to support your relationship and your family. It's just the two of you.
As for me, I choose to move out and away and hope that time will allow parents from both sides to put aside the biases and prejudices. Let the love of two persons to be light and example that shines through. That's all I can think of. Wishing that everything works out well eventually in your situation. God bless.
I wish things will all be in order, and all people believe in God.
I HAVE TO SAY AS A BLACK WOMAN WHO LOVES DIFFERENT CULTURES AND RACES. I'M SO DISAPPOINTED TO HEAR THESE KINDS OF STORIES. LATELY, I HAVE FOUND MYSELF LOVING CHINESE AND KOREAN MUSIC AND SHOWS. SO WHEN I HEAR THEY WON'T LIKE ME BECAUSE I'M BLACK WOW. I WILL NOT PUT ALL ASIAN PEOPLE IN THE SAME BUCKET BUT STILL WHAT THE HELL. I COULD SAY THIS MUCH ANY ASIAN MAN WOULD BE LUCKY TO HAVE SOMEONE LIKE ME TO COME HOME TO. I'M SO PROUD TO BE A BLACK WOMAN AND I WOULD NOT LET ANYONE IGNORANCE CHANGE MY LOVE FOR GOD BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE. I WILL KEEP LOVING MY CHINESE MUSIC AND DRAMA ESPECIALLY KUNGFU ONES. LOVE IT AND YES I REALLY LOVE ME.
Love does not cover all things, what if 10 years down the line the man leaves you and the kids to go back to his parents?
Truth is I may be in love with you but if your family does not accept me I won't force it.
Yeah. I feel exactly the same way, me I want a family that likes me oh. I want to be comfortable with y’all. 😄😁
@@ucheobuekwe Exactly, maybe it is because here in Nigeria we believe that when a woman gets married she is not just marrying the man but also marrying his family too, I can't be with someone whose family would make my life a living hell especially not because of the colour of my skin. Nobody chose the race they were born into, no one chose their skin colour, people shouldn't be judged based on those things because they are out of their control, rather the content of a person's character is more important. I wish the young lady all the best and may God help her make the right choice.
Yeah exactly…please check on jin and juice
I agree. If the family can't accept me, I'm not in.
Indeed... I don't force it..
But just go down on my knees
I say end the relationship because I was dating woman parents that hated me because I had a learning disability. Behind my back they use too say I “slow and nothing I was” I was heartbroken and hurted. It takes years to recover and I had to go to therapy to recover. But now I forgive them and over it!!! However, ultimately it up to her!!! Uche Obuekwe is right once she get married not long up to her and the boyfriend!! His family will be your family. And be more issues/complications. Please don’t get me wrong I believe if his or she is treating you right and both of you all is happy. Why not be in a relationship. But if his family don’t accept you it not a good feeling and she going to get more issues and complications!!!! I am not going to say good luck but Godspeed it more safe journey!!!!
I would advice you to leave the relationship because if his parents don't want you , with time the son will also change.trust me,i have seen many relationships failing because of that.
The parents will eventually pass on to after life with their objections if they fail to make peace with their reality.
**Having said that, Uche, "ekerie gi na China, ihuru ihe oke mere azu di na ngiga, o ihe anyi ga emegi...Lol.
Omg is that an igbo proverb?
Let me go ask my mum what it means because I don’t get it 😄😄
Real Love bears all trials, believes in all things good, hopes in all things good, and endures all things that oppose it. Real love, True Love never fails...but people do. The simple fact is that most people are not taught to love unselfishly and therefore are accustomed to loving until whatever happens. Most people don't even know how to love but rather.. they like or are infatuated with a person but mistake these things with love. It's unfortunate how common it is for people to use infatuation, admiration, & liking interchangeably with love. They are NOT the same LOL
When you find love......you will know it. Race, cultural differences do not interfere if your heart is open to love 💕
you are all liars
It’s a lie, every civilization, culture or tradition are not the same. Some people don’t have any culture or tradition they look up to in forming a family…. Be careful who you date and not to be a problem to your family. Mariage in my African culture is between two families not just between man and woman.
@@dubemellit2932 , let them keep deceiving themselves.
Being confident, As a Chinese, I am blind in people's color of skin, I feel u r beautiful, so if his parents refuse maybe u find another one who is better
I think it just takes time for a country like China. You are absolutely gorgeous. I wont care what my mom said about you lol, I am Chinese.
One of the best resources for stories about interracial marriages between Asians and non-Asians is KDOC TV. I have seen many Korean parents who temporarily disowned their own kids, sometimes for years, admit that they were wrong on camera.
Many stories are the same. They often say things like “when they had kids I came around” or “when I saw how they were together I came around. I watched one where this black guy married a Korean woman, the dad refused to come to the wedding. 7 years later the dad and his son-in-law were literally holding hands and walking through a park, a rare sight.
My opinion based on this is that as long as the new spouse/partner has a good heart, there is opportunity. Sometimes I am angry when I see how hard that the new husband (it’s more often a foreign man that parents are upset about) will work to get approval. I feel like they should be angry with their new in-laws for being so prejudiced. But I am impressed with how everyone works together to build a new bond.
父母在不了解的情况下，长期受错误观念的引导，而做出的判断，在中国不是个例而是很普遍。我建议1.爱情是双方的无论如何，家庭问题只是一点小小的阻碍 2.试着让父母真正的了解你，他们会找到正确答案的。 对于这种情况，我很心疼你们尤其是你。对对方有信心，会好起来的
Love can conquer all !!! You are exceptional Uche !!!! I enjoy your vlogs !!!!!
Thanks a lot.❤️
@@ucheobuekwe you are very welcome !!!
This is such a sad situation but then i hope she figures it out... inter racial marriages are hard enough honestly i wouldn't add more by marrying someone whose parents don't approve
Love can concur all...But it is so difficult!!!!!!
A lot of Asian parents don’t want their kids marrying black people. I mentioned this before in a previous video you posted. They don’t want black grandkids! And most of the time their kids give in to the parents. Dating Asian men is a losing battle most of the time.
Not with the rich, they will marry to continue retaining their wealth plus expen too.
Yes if the love is very strong. Don't worry if he is yours he will 100 % come back to u. Plus his parents will accept u too. My sis married an Indian ( not rich) n my parents were totally against to the extent of cutting her inheritance but at the end they got married n got inheritance too.
Marry him only if he 100% want u n tell his parents they have no choice.
I have a girlfriend, a divorcee with a kid plus older then the guy 3yrs. His mum was a 100% no no. But he was so sure on what he wants. Ended very well. She gave birth to 2 more. N the mil was very happy , the husband accepted friend 's daughter totally as part of the family.
If u do marry him please forgive his parents n treat them nice as they did not know u well. Don't take their son away totally. Understand that they want the best for their son n misjudged u.
Don't feel sad time will tell whether he is yours. Wish u the best.
If she don't like you I don't like her
😄😁
If the parents do not accept them, you can not marry them because in the end the kids would be hurt. Family should be family not broken before even starts!
It dépend the Mindset of the Person and the strenght of the Love. If you are prepared mentaly to pass above all the obstacle and if your love is strong you have to follow your Heart. But if you don't have a strong Mindset, and the Others have a Big influence on you, It Will be difficult. It depend your strenght. But the Life is very surprising Thing everything can Happen.
U speak very wise eventhough u are young. M sure u gave it a deep thought. I think every parents wish their children marry their own kind cos they think its easy to understand n communicate.
To me, I think both side must show their parents what they really want . I m from Malaysia n we have alot of inter marriages. My father will tell me to ask my sis to drop her white husband n come back!!! N he also told another sis that he will disown her if she marries her present Indian husband. Well, nobody listen not even my 2 brothers with white wifes.
I also want to tell u Africans that i think the Chinese culture n the African's are quite similar - from watching u people n my very good Zambian friends who i knew 50yrs back!!!
My parents finally ok cos they don't want to spoil their children's happiness n get blamed. Just think so many millions in this world n yet we seem to love so few!!!
Good luck n best wishes to all those lovers out there.
I'm an older person and I like your content and this topic is a close one to my heart because I am also in an interracial relationship and as you started with love conquers all and if both parties involved love each other and stand their ground no parent no one can break that and with God involved you two put heads together because at the end of the day all who are against love are just being controlled by fear the fear of what if and that's a terrible place to be.The race and colour don't matter because people are people everywhere and the thing we see as a difference between us really is stuff used to spice up the relationship you know learning about each other's childhood, friends, experiences,and yes even family.Love should be allowed to grow and bloom and the little I know of the Chinese culture they can be a bit much but this younger generation is changing and there are ways around it, because I am a living example of seeing these same parents and others who were against are very proud now and the very stubborn ones who refuse to soften up you just got to find a way to love them from far.♥️♥️♥️💞💞💞
That's typical of some Asian parents, I met a few Asian parents that don't like me. And I'm Asian and same ethnic group as the parents . If you both prove that its love and not just crushing. Usually the parents will accept it , or learn to accept it.
If you don't want to marry that person just because of what the parents think or say .then you don't really love that person. And it makes the parents correct about there opinions. Of it being a bad idea of marriage.
I appreciate your point of view! You want a spiritual love regardless status,race,and wealth. Life is a journey and every Journey is authentically different! LIVE YOUR LIFE! May you find what you seek!
To the person that wrote in: people are people they believe what they have been taught. You could be the nicest person in the world but his parents have been brainwashed. If you love him and he truly loves you he has to come to terms with who his real friends are and believe me he is not going to like it. All around the world people have been spreading lies and roomer about the Africa Americans and Africans that what it has always been about. Honey just be you and do not fake anything and he also better realize what is about to happen in his life. If his parents really love him they will come around. These people of all color attend church or whatever. But I have come to know the hate breeds diseases all throughout the human body. Oh and guess what know one wants to die. It is only a skin color difference and culture difference. If they and any other person strongly feels all this hate against people of color than people don't sell in their communities and stay out of their neighborhoods. God is Love how could anyone call themselves a Christian or service God with all this hate in your heart. Forgiveness is key. Try to get to know someone before you judge them. To the young man involved with the Africa n lady your parents are not going to live forever you need to live your life the way you want to. Facts you pay your own bills ,etc. So by all means love who you want to love. If you ever make any kind of mistakes you have to answer know one else and vice versa, ok peace and love to all of you living your best life. Amen..
Uche is a very serious prepared Person to make a video. She writes a lot.
Lmao. I take my TH-cam very very seriously.
All my videos are planned and I always have my points written down.😆✨✨
@@ucheobuekwe good. You Work very well.
Welcome to my world. I feel for you. Sadly although love can conquer all, the journey through the maze of racism is never ending and painful. Your questions really hit home. As a child I was rejected by white grandparents. You have to be in credibly strong and supportive to your children if you choose to go on with the relationship. But hey, love conquers all. ❤
I think you and Joe need to sit down and face each other in conversation of the pros and cons of marriage , children, and acceptance on all levels for every stage of life.
Is love the be all end all for the happiness of your relationship?
There is a lot to consider.
Would he be willing to move to Nigeria?
Do you want to reside in China?
What kind of social life would you expect to have?
The relationship is 2 years old.
Better to know and understand before moving any further towards marriage and family.
My understanding of the world comes from a "black" American or descendants of the "enslaved." Therefore, I've had encounters over decades of a sampling of people from around the globe. Marrying someone or even being involved with someone outside of what you would consider your culture is something to consider. Other than this...:
Depending on your status, your education level, and the amount of money you and your family have could play a role in your decision-making; like it or not, marriage could also be seen as a business arrangement, especially since you're most likely to have children.
With all things being nearly equal or not too far apart with education and finances, I suggest you get a contractual agreement that you sign. Otherwise, you could end up, like so many people, robbed and poisoned against your ex, thanks to the lawyers and supporters who deprive the family of its assets through the practice of family law.
The world seems in turmoil, where anything can and will happen. Being aware, above all, that a family needs stability and ending this stability places all you have at risk. Finally, it's good to want to believe that "race" doesn't matter, but power and resources were divided by exploitation based on the concept of "race." Therefore, the focus you'll find on your appearance and your children's appearance will shock you, especially if you're not prepared.
With the white "race" (whatever this means to you) assumed to be number one, the African "blacks" are considered to be at the bottom of preference. This was established in the 18th century by law and in application. Race will be a problem because of the investment in racism as a political tool to extract goods and resources, which is embedded in many institutions and systems globally. Thank you, and good luck.
The world is fast changing and there are lots of interracial mariages. Love some times make wonderful things happen. I am from Igbo and married to white Europeen over 35 years ago. I was immediatly wellcome and accepted to his family. I prefer white to Chinese though because they are more open to learn and accept other culture than Chinese. Good luck to you.
Dont marry someone whose parents dont absolutely love you. You need to be family. The rejection will never be less painful. They will treat you like their grandkids mother - not their daughter😢😢
Marriage is about the two people that are married and has God in the middle. The family is on the outside of that union. In my opinion if they feel that they want to spend the rest of their lives with each other and they both are ready to fully unconditionally love each other then they should go ahead and get married. Love isn't about race, culture or creed....Love is simply about Love.
I have a Chinese boyfriend, we’ve been together for almost 2 months and he’s afraid to tell his parents about me because I’m black and his parents want him to marry a Chinese girl 😔
Please package our African beauty and bring it back home your own will find and accept you just as beautiful as you're.
the question is: is the rejection of in- laws and others worth your relationship, or can you not live without each other. if you can’t live without each other ( honestly) your question is answered.
It’s ashamed from all viewpoints if 2 ppl love each other and they going to have a wonderful life together the parents or the old ways being afraid of differents special when they dnt have a reason why shouldn’t be or getting married cause u say so and to say they have nothing to due with u anymore that means those parents have no heart ❤️ and the world has changed longs us ppl in this world travel into each other space it will happen even when slavey happens they mix love or world traverses or ppl goes to college or ect. It’s going to happen so they have to get over it true love is true love
Asian men are so attractive I would love to find my soulmate in Asia 😭💗
I wish you the best in this..😁✨
Don’t just look at the face value, what is within matter the most dear. What you see on social media and movies isn’t really just watch for your entertainment and keep it moving. If you find the Asian man that is well suited for you, good and well but remember the face value is temporary. This is my opinion, you don’t have to take any of it.
@@TemiLagos no I know that I just think Asian men are attractive and they’re my type but I wouldn’t date only for looks 🙌🏾
Lmao, they ain't imo. And it doesnt make sense to be thirsting openly for men who dont do the same for you. Black women are just as beautiful as other women. We do our hair in amazing styles no one else does, look marvelous in bright colors. How many videos do you see praising our beauty? There we go.
In the bible samson's parents said no and he went ahead and did it still and he end up bad,God always tell parents things So in the futrue you will see why.
Je suis chinois et je me suis marié à une femme de couleur ( noir) . J'ai eu 4 enfants et on a vecu 48 ans ensemble ( elle nous a quitté pour rejoindre le seigneur). Beaucoup d'obstacles mais on s'en fiche, après 5 années ensemble on a été accepté. Alors si il t'aime c'est à lui d' affronter sa famille comme moi . Et vous êtes belle et intelligente,tu continues tes études, tu trouveras un époux digne de ton amour.
Love does conquer, if it is is indeed love. The question which must be asked is this. Is the objection based on vibes or constructive stuff? Or is it based on the fact of blacks having to "prove" their worth. From the little I have seen of you, you are quality and it's they who should be trying to impress you.
The objection is basically based off of the color of the skin < black> nothing else really
what is important is the person's character, personality, compatibility and values, not the ethnicity.... sadly everywhere in the world people tend to be tribal, but fortunately the barriers are slowly coming down🙏🙏
You got it right.
Hopefully one day we will be able to completely overcome all racial and tribal bias 🙏✨
You should really follow on what is REALLY going in Africa as well. These Chinese are over exploiting children in Malawi and propaganding them as animals. Also other parts of Africa these Asians that come there don't want to understand the people and respect the people and their heritage. So if I were you. I would see this as blessing in disguise. These people don't look and see us as human beings with religion, culture, and heritage that runs much deeper than theirs. I pray that you find your blessed one.
Yes it is incredibly disheartening what they are doing in Africa.
I hope the African government steps up and punishes such people accordingly and possible have been deported as their actions are inexcusable.
That being said, a few of them are actually nice and genuine people and I have one or two of such as friends. 😊
What did you expect?
When you have an Asian family 🐁 you will know what it means by your family will never ever leave you 🐁
You will know what it means by Asian families and relatives gathering.. 🐁 you will have a family and you will love it so much and you will feel that you will always have someone.. and never ever be lonely 🪳
Unfortunately, the real truth is that everywhere and every races in the world, fair-skined peoples are preferred.
That is a lie. You have a nerve typing that trash. If youre fair and your face is ugly? Who would choose you?
The dumbest statement on the planet.
I don't think she should give up without even trying to win them over, most people have unconscious bias until they know better. Anyway good luck to her
My skin color dark.
I like dark skin , I'm very white I'm trying to bronze
Yeah I know some Indians are dark. Are you as dark as me?
Most Indians I’ve seen are light skinned though
@@miraa4221 where are you from?
@@ucheobuekwe Have you ever been to india?
@@ucheobuekwe in china TH-cam banned . How do you use TH-cam in china
I think all SOME chines parents colour are important To them.. and they more Like chines girl To their son.im just talking reality what We see right as My observation. but if im situation of the chines guy i will stand up what i really love...💪and If im Your situation i ask what the really guy want To do of Your realationship and givea little time To think you both then do final plan.. If you feel not really work then its time To cut and find another loved one.
Haven’t heard from you in a while??????? WHAT’S HAPPENING???????
My video is blank babe just sound
It’s internet never mind
@@misscidella Lol okay
The yruth is that you marry families, friends, and connections..
I agree!!!
I agree!!!
Jehovah God and his son loves us and we must thank him and his faithful son Jesus extended to us, even under pain and torture and a cruel death !!! We as humans are taught that love is something that is extended in this world. Not true, Lust is what this world is about.... and that will past !!!
Love is not about working hard and striving...Love edifies...It lies between two hearts and the family members...That's y people end up regretting and suffering in a relationship they didn't want....Pay a deaf ear to negativity... Love has to be of joy, happiness, and not sorrow ....Never , with this God I believed.
Love is good, it's great but not enough for marriage/lifetime commitment. And like in everything, you need to know what risks, the possible outcomes and consequences of such risks and make your decision.
For situations like this, going ahead with the relationship and even marriage faces the risk of never ever being accepted by the family, the risk of this wearing the guy himself down and out overtime. Consequences are divorce and single-motherhood.
But again there are also possibilities of it working out eventually and happiness ever after. No one can predict final outcomes. You need to review the risks, the possible consequences of such risks and the sunshine flip side. You decide.
But Uche, something tells me it's you actually in the situation. Shine ya eye. Asanwa make dem no mess you up. Peace
I have experienced something like this but trust me if your partner loves you he can make his family know how good you are. With time I think they'll accept you but if they insist pls quiet
Do you respect yourself, if you just walk away from the relationship.
Most of you dont know this. But if you are black be very careful dating any man outside your country.
Most nonblack men think black women are easy.
Never sleep with men casually. Ever. If they are not serious about you they should not touch you. No one should be wasting their time with anyone who wont introduce them to their parents.
Hi Uche, I enjoy your videos very much. Can I ask a unrelated question tho? I recently heard that it's impossible for people from a few African countries to open a bank account in China because these countries are blacklisted. I wonder if you know anything about it? Thanks.
Hhmmm,this is a difficult situation,I'll say listen to your heart.
Goodluck & bless up
Watching from Sydney Australia
Sweet responses to your video, you have nice subscribers.
It’s up to them because in the end, no matter what advice is given, each adult in the relationship is responsible for their own decisions. They should not resent their partners if they stay and have regrets or their parents if they split now or later and have regrets. They are not children. They should talk it out and think it through consider all the aspects then decide each for themselves what it is they want. There will be tears, heartbreak, regret, and anger for someone no matter what they choose. The parents MAY come around, they may not, can he accept and live with the consequences?
My values/beliefs/limits/boundaries versus _everyone else._ Always tricky and it's up to what you're willing to accept going forward with your love choices.
God will choose my spouse 🐁 not anyone else lol hahahahahahahahahahaha 🐁