My sensory issue is touching dishes that were left in the sink. I just can't stand when oils and juices from all of the dishes combine and cover all of the dishes from all sides.
When I was little I also thought that I was an alien or "the chosen one" some sort of so I often did stuff to be sick or hurt (lightly) so my parents could send me to the doctor and check my blood. I though if the doctor checked my blood they will notice that I'm not of this planet XD.
Omg when I was younger I thought I was a fairy or someone from another planet. Like genuinely believed I was an alien who had been sent to infiltrate the human race then had my memory wiped because I couldn’t blend in. And the mother ship went. Though I couldn’t work out what I wasn’t doing right or anything just that I was considered weird (blissfully in my own world). It wasn’t until a teacher told, me I needed to be “more normal” so that “people would stop picking on me”. In year 7 that I realised.
that sentence left me jaw dropped. im undiagnosed but exploring. i was shocked because i've literally told one of my therapists that if an alien came to me and said that they're bringing me home, i wouldn't be surprised. in fact, i may feel relieved as it would explain why i feel SO out of touch with this world.
Neither. I just assumed it was something I didn’t have for some reason and yet everyone was telling me that it was obvious you can basically replace “common sense” with that. Also I had no idea on the ways these traits could present and took the dsm criteria literally and didn’t realise it could show in different ways.
As an ADHDer who does suffer from this lack of “common” sense I really appreciate that.. for me it’s a daily struggle, and currently at work it happens a lot when my boss tells me to do something in a way that for me isn’t understandable. I need things to be said to me in a very specific way and very informative, I need the reason behind it in order to get the “sense” behind the task, without it I cannot conclude it myself like other people can. And it’s so frustrating to get his judgmental face, telling me that it takes a lot of patience to explain to me things, or just giving up on asking me to do something knowing I probably won’t understand (instead of him trying to understand that the way he talks isn’t so understandable to everyone) and that just hurts. So thank you, because “common sense” to one person isn’t very common for the other
I feel like not having been diagnosed until I was 34 forced me to break some of those habits, but I'm definitely on the inanimate object train, because I have a blanket and we have been through some shit.
Gave me a chuckle. I still have not been diagnosed, but a professional I spoke with said she would not be surprised if I am on the spectrum. In these sorts of videos I sometimes think "well I'm not really like that", but I can recall being very much like that when I was younger. Additionally, I can see remnants of some of those traits now. The unusually strong attachment to things? Oh that I can really relate to. I once slammed a friend into a door because he was touching a watch that was given to me by a relative, after I told him not to touch it. I would get absolutely furious about people touching some of my stuff. My bike was sacred. My watch was sacred. My video games were sacred. I couldn't part with these things even if I didn't use them or if they didn't work anymore. If I am on the spectrum, I think it's safe to say that I've learned to mask very well in many ways. Not so well in a few. I'm looking into being evaluated in the near future. But I was told it can be difficult to find someone who will evaluate someone well into adulthood.
I'm 34 and I've never been diagnosed, but a lot of this resonates with me, so I enjoy watching regardless. Same with my husband- though, he doesn't sleep with a stuffed animal and greet it with a kiss and a squeeze every morning as I do. 😳 I feel compelled. 😅
I can tell if someone replaced "my controller" for my playstation2 because I can feel the difference. And yes, I did get upset when my brother used to switch it out while I was gone xD
I was diagnosed in early twenties and it's the same for me as well. I learnt how to deal with change and adapt. It is still going to make me grumpy but I am not going to have a meltdown.
As a kid to teen, I would read tones of books. Every book I owned was special because we weren't rich so I couldn't just go out and buy a book. When I was 13 and we (my mom, sister and I) were moving out in hurry using the fact that my father was at work (great source of mental and emotional abuse, and probably a PTSD, thanks, dad) and my mom was like we don't have time or room to pack all your books rn. When I tell you, I had a MAJOR panic attack/meltdown/breakdown/whatever. I always had a very emotional attachment to books and stories. I love the saying that "A reader lives a thousand lives" and that "When I read a new book, it's like I meet a new friend. And when I read a book I've read before, it's like meeting an old friend". I never really got attached to people, like "out of sight, out of mind". But the books 😭. Also one of mom's friends was at our place and seeing me with a fantasy book (I would also drag a book with me to school, family events, traveling etc.) said "she'll grow out of it"... Another meltdown, it felt like someone just clawed into a corner stone of my identity and tore it out of my soul". I despise that man to this day. I actually started sobbing and rocking from recalling those events, lol.
I wonder how much of these things get drowned out or smothered when going undiagnosed for so long. I’m in my 30’s and though I did/probably did a lot of those stuff when I was a kid a lot got beat/punished out of me.
I really relate to that. I mask so much that my symptoms are not obvious to others and I don’t even know if it’s worth trying to be diagnosed, because I probably won’t be believed. But I was always punished for exhibiting these traits, and that made childhood a very confusing time for me.
@@noranelson1339 I mask a lot and was able to get a diagnosis. I think it’s possible, especially if you work on unmasking a bit before your appointment. But some doctors are horrible and it also takes some luck to find a good one who’s up to date on autism
Truer words have never been said...wait, you weren't talking about me. All jokes aside, I learned how to suppress meltdowns as a kid because I was always punished when I had them. So I did the only thing I could to survive, and subsequently had countless shutdowns over the rest of my childhood and did far more damage to myself than I ever could have to other people (my meltdowns were never physically violent btw, I mean emotional damage)
Paige you are a life saver, you’re the reason I’m talking to my therapist about autism. I’ve always known I’m different and finding you has made me realize I’m not “broken” or “wrong” and I am so greatfull!!
Literally. Thanks to autistic creators making videos about what it's like to be autistic, especially as a girl/woman, and the comments below those videos, I gained so much self love and sense of self worth. I talked to my mom about my suspecions, and made a list of traits that I definitely relate to (the needing clear instructions one in this video hit really hard, too) and she said she thinks I might be autistic too and wants to help me seek diagnosis (I kinda self identify at this point but for some reason I don't think I'll feel quite a member of the community until I have been officially diagnosed). It's like the way I am, and think, and feel, and perceive the world, and interact with it, as well as with people around me, finally makes sense and doesn't feel like I'm a weirdo. High five! :)
@@Kasiarzynka me as well, at 30 I finally have clarity as to what my brain is doing that is autism. Back in highschool I got so frustrated trying to understand a math question that all the other students around me understood but I for some reason could not no matter how many times I would read and reread the question I eventually got so frustrated I started crying. My teacher at the time just looked at me and could not fathom as to why I was so frustrated with just this one question she looked at me and she said " the question is as plain as the sky is blue I don't understand how you don't understand this" and I started bawling.... explaining that I couldn't understand over and over. ( I have many more moments like this in my life and now I understand that there is a name to it. Autism.
I'm ADHD with an autistic sibling, and there's some things that work really well with that combo (infodumping, wanting steps spelled out) and really Not. Like, I fundamentally hate things to be boring. Repetitive things are boring, so I try to switch things up at every opportunity. My little sister... not so much. "Hey, let's just dink around and see what happens!" "How about we don't" "Why not? It'll be fun" "I don't think so" lol. I forget stuff a lot too, so sometimes I'll say I'll do something and forget, which for her is breaking a promise. Breaking promises is basically a federal crime in her eyes. I actually really like that about her, I like her bluntness, and I admire how she can be so dedicated to one or two things that she figures out all the tiny details about it. We don't always get along but we love each other
I almost cried when she talked about inanimate objects bc I actually went through a lot of mental distress over furniture, plants etc. I used to visit and talk to our old couch that we put out on the street and cried when I realized it got taken with the garbage. I also would pet and talk to every single Christmas tree I saw on the sidewalk after Xmas bc I didn’t want them to feel bad or lonely :’)
Omg Paige, this is me. I haven’t been diagnosed yet, but my kids did. I’m in the process and already had my 1st appointment of 2 + hours. I wasn’t great that day and unable to process anything b/c I had my kids with me. But guess what? I just turned 42. People don’t believe my age nor that I’m in the spectrum.
I have pretty severe ADHD and have a lot of these traits as well and it was really interesting to hear about them from another perspective. Also, you look stunning today!
I have ADHD and have recently started realising that I have a lot of Autistic traits too. I'm hypersensitive to sound and textures in food, I often have a hard time understanding Sarcasm and I take things literally a lot, I have difficulty knowing when i'm hungry, thirsty or tired and will often go the entire day without eating anything if no one reminds me, I have intense obsessions that often last for many months or years, I have trouble completing assignments for school if they do not have very specific instructions and guidelines, I get stressed and upset if something I have planned for and tend to follow the same routine most days and can get stressed if it is majorly disturbed, I personify objects and get really emotionally attached to them, And I often get overwhelmed in seemingly normal situations (usually social situations) and find it hard to talk much and sorting things into piles, and I fidget and Stim alot. No one has ever suggested that I might be Autistic but have been doing alot of research and I identify with a lot of the symptoms and I took all of the tests in Page's video where she took them and got autism likely scores on all of them, given that, the research i've done, and the high comorbidity rate between ADHD and Autism I think it might be worth trying to bring it up to my family and get a diagnosis but i'm not sure, any thougts?
Definitely bring it up at your next appointment! It's absolutely worth mentioning to the doctor if you are wanting to pursue a formal diagnosis for any reason. I'm working on something similar now myself. Best of luck, friend! :)
See, the thing is, I have most of these traits now as an adult. And I remember having some when I was younger. But, due to trauma I don't hold many memories from childhood, and I can't tell if I am the way that I am because of autism, adhd, or due to my childhood trauma. It's frustrating.
You have helped me so much, I'm actually currently looking into getting a proper autism diagnosis. The only things I knew about autism were related to "little boys" and how autism is persevered from an outsider. Having autism explained by someone who is actually autistic, what it actually feels like, has been exactly what I need. Thank you.
Nailed it. All the way to "and I would like instruction." If only they would be specific and let me ask questions! I am trying so hard to learn how to be a good human.
I love the little "reenactments" of each trait. They're so relatable. The change thing is funny, I've been thinking about that a lot lately because I always thought of myself as the kind of person who is very open to new things, but as I've examined the patterns in my behavior over the years, I've realized that although I am drawn to novelty, I am simultaneously terrified of unpredictability. The rules bit cracks me up because that's a constant struggle for me at work. "The invoice has a section that is clearly marked 'customer shipping.' Why would you put the address under 'production notes?' That doesn't make any sense at all! I need to be able to know where to look to find what I need." I also drive my coworkers batty sometimes with the last trait. You can't just give me a project by telling me the end goal and expecting me to figure out the rest. I need to know, or at least have enough information to deduce, step by step, how to get there. Thanks for making these vids.
Oh my heavens, watching you was like watching a grown up version of my 6 year old daughter! Especially the sensory issues and her reactions when her expectations are not met. She is my sweetheart though and learning how her mind works both fascinates and exhausts me every day. Exhausted because I worry so much over her future as an autistic person. Watching your videos give me hope that she can grow up well and is not doomed to a terrible life. Thank you for sharing!
Wow the way you explained the paragraph/school related instructions thing HITS DIFFERENT. For one of my final papers last year in Uni, I had to have three different people explain the prompt to me before I could even think about starting to write it because I was so overwhelmed by the possibilities 😅🤦🏼♀️
I do not have autism, but I've always felt a deep connection to certain inanimate objects, I always feel so bad for my stuffies if I throw them on the floor when I'm mad, and things like that :')
Oh I really appreciate the multiple example scenarios you gave! Often when I just hear the statement I start to think that “nah, I don’t really experience this, do I?” BUt when examples are given more often than not I go “ehhh.. yup, I totally do that!” Special shoutout to toothbrushes - I feel bad for them when I have to toss them, so I always put them in the package of the replacement before throwing them away because that way they at least have it a bit nicer????? Bahaha
the rules thing is spot on. if i get assigned an essay at school and they don't tell me how many paragraphs it needs, how many sentences need to be in each paragraph, and an example opening paragraph, i will most likely cry out of stress of not knowing what to do. WHY DO THEY STOP ALLOWING ESSAY OUTLINES AFTER MIDDLE SCHOOL
The furniture scene reminded me of this one time when my parents moved the furniture and I don’t think it bothered me at the time, I may have even been exited about it, but I remember a couple months later I wanted to re-arrange it on my own and was going to put one of the couches in the same spot that it used to be.
I am not diagnosed with autism, but I am diagnosed with OCD and ADD and a LOT of these traits match up perfectly with me! Especially the special interests & routines. I can sit and look at maps for hours and hours & talk about geography forever and I know that it drives people insane but I physically cannot help it. I also deal with many debilitating routines that, if not performed correctly, make me physically ill until I can get them completed in the right way.
I don't know if I still have weird routines, but when I was about four years old, every time we got home, I insisted that I be the first to step on our "stoop" (the small step before the door outside the house) and say "put my foot on the stoop" as I did it. If someone else did it first, I would cry and we would have to go all the way back to the car and start over! Also, I had no idea about the strong empathy toward inanimate objects thing. Why is that related to autism? I always thought I was like that because I consider my self an "empath" (hyper-empathetic), which is probably related to autism. I say goodbye to my toothbrushes when I throw them away and think about how sad they will be in the dump, I bite animal-shaped foods' heads off first to minimize suffering, and I'm still not convinced that my dear stuffed animals are not alive. Basically, I need to remind myself often that non-living things have no wants, needs, or feelings. 😅 That being said, nobody ever observed possible autism in me until recently, and I still have no diagnosis.
My routine is: getting up at 10 a.m., lying in bed for an additional 1-1.5 hour, going breakfast, hanging on my phone for an additional hour, then deciding what to do for the day, doodling a bit or working on my stories, on my phone another hour, mentally prepare for preparing dinner at 5 p.m., actually preparing dinner at 6 p.m., eating dinner at 7 p.m. and occasionally talk with my father, going upstairs and drawing a bit or hanging on my phone, making tea after half an hour, staying up late until midnight. staying up an additional hour until 1 a.m. Going to sleep. Sadly my routine doesn't align at all with the routine I was SUPPOSED to follow due to university :( And that's why I get worn out so easily if I have to go to university and do stuff for it. I also suffer under depression, missed a whole semester of uni and lost all of friends because they were ableist, that's why my schedule got "messed up" :(
Male, 58, and identified as autistic at 55. Now I understand so much more about myself and why I am the way I am. My 1st wife used to spontaneously paint different rooms in the house and/or rearrange furniture to relieve her boredom and the tedium of sameness. (It was really unnerving to be honest.) But I never pushed back because as an undiagnosed youth, I was conditioned for compliance to the point of CPTSD by an authoritarian father who thought he could beat me into a good boy. (His own version of ABA, I guess.) All of this, the OCD-looking traits, the routines, the safety in repetition and rules, the dysregulation of change all applies to me to such an extent that I am confused why I was never identified as autistic prior to my retirement. My sensory issues: always too bright outside when ANY sunshine peeks through the clouds, temperature (being too hot or too cold), clothing material & textures, socks & shoes never feel quite right, like they are sliding down my feet or the shoes are always too loose or too tight, never secure. Loud bass subwoofers, or sharp loud noises are the worst. I am a sensory seeker for colorful, sparkly, glittery, tie-dyed, rainbow stuff (contrasted against goth black mostly). I am also an auditory sensory seeker for any calming audio stimulation with low BPM (beats per minute), little dynamic variation and without lyrics to distract my attention.
I feel better after telling everyone that I had more of a communication block. I couldn't say the right thing to match the way they want me to say things. I noticed I don't know how to take photos, I get a blank stare every photo. It so hard to follow social structures. I just feel like disappearing sometimes.
1. No. 2. No. 3. Yes, but not as extreme as example 4. No more than most people, unless you could arranging toys into families and having a hard time getting rid of them because you don't want to split up the families. 5. Yes, but usually more than two and they come and go and sometimes return. 6. Sometimes, but they have to have the weaker signs of disinterest and depends on person I'm talking to and the circumstance. Sometimes I do it because I can't think of another topic, the other person feels uncomfortable with the lack of talking, but can't think of something to talk about. Sometimes because I feel like it's something that needs to be heard regardless as if the person is interested. 7. Depends on what type of change. 8. Kinda, but not as extreme as the example and less judgmental on people and more on the actions. I am very strict in my standards, but respect those who do not share the same beliefs. I see tiny facts within larger facts explaining them. 9. Not really. 10. Yes, but not as extreme as example. I've been diagnosed in my early elementary years.
Oh my God the wind. I could not yesterday I had a complete meltdown just because of the wind and I really needed Brown sugar but I could not walk to the further grocery store because of the wind. Life struggles
It's something about the mannerisms that are so relatable- like when you were info dumping and you were handing onto the back of the chair and sort of drifting about your area and the fuckin. Open hand fingertaps on the table to enunciate your words- I've done ALL of that while talking about nrms lmao
thank you for describing me at your age. i'm 49 now, and still struggle, but it does get " easier" at times. you learn from your experiences. and we learn to fake it. and a lot of times, it's just easier to just stop. stop, regroup, venture out again. the few real friends we have, know. they know it's us, and it's not our or their fault. that there's nothing wrong, just know that we have to work things out...the changes, the schedules, etc
the thing is i dont remember anything from when i was a like a little kid, like when you say child how young? but i definitely remember the never shutting up thing
I got diagnosed with ADHD 2 years ago (at 22) and I've been doing a lot of research to learn about myself and how I work. It's been difficult trying to figure out if the things I'm feeling are due to my ADHD, or because I might also be on the Autism spectrum as well. I know they have overlapping symptoms, but the reasons for why they occur are different. I feel some things I do might be linked to Autsim rather than ADHD, but it's really hard to tell. Some things I'm strict about, some things I can adjust to. Some things have to be the same, some things I want new and refreshed. Which is what happens with people on both spectrums. I'll have to do more research, and when I see my therapist next in a few week I'll bring it up to her, but all I can say is I'm very confused :( so thank you for making videos like this that are really easy to understand with easy to understand language and examples, it's so helpful! ♥
This video is really helpful because it makes me realise that the autism classification doesn't fit me that well. A lot of people have told me that I appear autistic. But, I am not driven by routines and I am relatively unbothered by moderate stimulation. Of course, everyone has feels they don't like, for example old sponges and oily/sticky fingers. But otherwise I crave texture and enjoy variety. The thing is though, I need precise clear instructions and prescribed routines to follow otherwise I forget things. There's many things that make me wonder if I have adhd more than autism. My therapist isn't sure and I'm not that motivated to explain my reasoning - the only area quite affected currently by my brain habits is work, and previously I've had very accommodating and compassionate supervisors which is why nothing ever came up until now.
I’m laughing so hard right now because I thought the stuff you were talking about in the special interest section was all common knowledge. I’ve recently realized that I do this a lot with very specific information
4:38 that’s so me 😂 I will just stand still not breathing while feeling if an outfit is going to work and then all of a sudden screaming at it while ripping it off 😅
resonated with a lot of your list. Corderoy is the worst! Also i hate being sticky. also repettitive sounds are the worst -- especially mouth sounds (like my dog licking). food textures are difficult. (coconut is the worst) when i was little it was "thingies" if a food or drink had an unidentifiyable foreign object i couldn't do it. my black and white lines are gray, i'm not black and white about my black and white rules. lol. i don't understand my own logic about the things that matter vs the things that don't. *shrugs*
Dear whoever is reading this, I wish there was a way for everyone to surpass the current obstacles or sadness/ stress and let happiness enter your heart! i truly sense and know you will have a beautiful life ahead of you! Nothing in life is ever easy, but what's important is that YOU keep going! Youre worthy of love and happiness, never allow anyone to tell you otherwise! I wish all of you plenty of health and strength during these tough times. You are loved, you are strong, you got this! Never forget that! Sending much Love over from Germany ♥️♥️♥️
Hey there kind stranger! Thank you so much for your lovely thoughtful message 😊 It really reached someone that needed to hear this today. I hope all these things for you too! Love in return from the U.S.! 💖
I actually highly related with half of things and have the EXACT opposite experience with the other half I have sensory issues, weird interests, info dumping, getting attached to items and acting like they are sentient, but routine is a NIGHTMARE, If a schedule keeps up for more than a week it will start getting exhausting. However, I can't handle major change. Moving house or changing location? One of my biggest nightmares. I am currently away from home for almost 2 months and it has been a nightmare, when what I am doing is a vacation for most people. I am also a very grey person and I tend to be a huge people pleaser. So much that it can be harmful to me. I also can't distinguish when someone is mean to me because I look at the matter grey-ly (for example: "What if their tone was just off? What is theey are just having a bad day?What if their niceness is fake?") with things that when others see them, they can instantly tell that this action is wrong or just simple kindness I also have way too many interests, and I change each week what I want to do, which has lead me to hundreds of unfinished goals and me being a jack of all trades but ace of none I have suspected for a long time myself of adhd and tried seeking help but no one believed me and I struggled with expressing myself more clearly due to the pressure of being asked personal questions shutting me even more, so it has lead nowhere so far
Me (being told that I definitely am nurotyipical all my life by my parents) Also me: -setting the table and always sitting in the same spot -gotta put out a shrine (not religious just because it feels right) and then swinging (never before or else) -freaking out when the stairs are un even (NO) -Walking on toes (since I first started walking) because NO EWW THE HEEL FEEL IS TINGLY -meltdown and shut down at STICKYNESD I HATE HATE HATE IT -ROCK SMOOTH -punched a kid when I was younger because they touched my stuffed animal then cried -HATE when people toutch my stuff because it now feels wrong -GREEK MYTHOLOGY AND PSYCHOLOGY IN THE FITH GRADE (not inspired by Percy Jackson) -got in trouble all of the time for talking too mutch and not getting the que to stop until the teacher moved me to the problem child area -(fact above made me almost get held back) -caused me to stop but will ramble non stop to myself -DAYLIGHT SAVINGS NO NO NO NO NO -stay on script WHY WOULD YOU CHANGE THE SCRIPT -I PLANED MY OUTFIT AND MY STEPS NOOO WHY -I said and I quote to someone when they asked how their shirt looks “ It doesn’t match your personality, makes you look fake and rude also makes you look ugly” wasn’t trying to say they were ugly just the shirt didn’t match -“WHY DID YOU BREAK THE GLASS” “ YOU SAID TO THROW IT IN THE SINK” -took off my shoes (also got into many arguments about this) because it felt wrong (idk why)
Happy Birthday! Thanks for making this video and this channel! I'm an Occupational Therapy Assistant that plans to work more with autistic children and provide them with a safe and supportive environment. This video was super helpful and I will keep your channel in mind as reference for treating those kiddos! Thank you again! Hope your birthday went fantastic!
These are all true. I do have black and white thinking at times, and I used to be more blunt and honest at times, and that caused issues in my youth. I do struggle with common sense. The whole being an alien on planet earth is soo true. I operate on such a different, maginitude, wavelength, frequency than the average human being does. I have too many emotions for the average male, and unconventional and eccentric interests, but i felt like I had to mask, and masking is soo hard because i fail at it lol. I do love routine, and i don't mind change, unless it's under my own accord and set rules. Sometimes my autism, clashes with society, because I operate so differently, and where im from, mental health, disabilities, nerdiness are stigmatized
I am about to embark on teaching my autistic husband to learn how to drive. I've already started making mental lists of everything I do while driving. like the 15 steps I do between sitting in the drivers seat to turning on the ignition. I want him to be as comfortable driving as he can be, so I'm trying to break it down into the smallest steps for him so he can learn in a routine. Its really mentally exhausting, but it just made me realise that I only have to do the mental work to accommodate him some of the time, but he has to do the work to try and "fit in" ALL of the time.
My niece was diagnosed with autism not too long ago. Her and I are very much alike, so are very close. And it was mind blowing to me to learn she had this. And then I have a very close friend, who has known me for a long time, say I had autistic traits. I guess its just been floating in the back of my head for awhile now and then this video popped up. And there are a lot of things in this video that i can strongly relate to. And its kind of scary. One or two things, maybe. But it was most of that list. I don't know how to feel about it. I mean, this is just how I've always been. I've never seen anyone, and no one has ever said anything besides the one friend I have (I dont talk to anyone else). So, unsure what to do lol. But, this video is very educational non the less and its greatly appreciated. Please continue doing what you're doing :)
Please take a look at what was happening in Soviet Union (whose goal was communism even though they only achieved socialism), how the government was treating people, how many died or had they life destroyed. Capitalism is deffinetely not perfect yet it’s the best out of all the options. I’m sorry, I know this is not what the video is about, but I’m from the CZ and things happening here when we were in the SU were just awful.
There’s this saying about history that proves true, “those who cannot remember the past are doomed to repeat it.” As someone who grew up in a cult, I cringe when I see populist movements on the left and right, though I prefer the ones that respect the rights of humans, that are not just white cis males. They both use labels and taking points, from past failed authoritarian regimes, most vilify anyone who doesn’t agree with them, many tap into people’s anger and fear. They overpromise and underdeliver, except to those who’s main concern is power. It’s so easy to believe the ends justify the means, without history being your guide. To be clear I’m not trying to imply bad motives of people who believe in communism or socialism. I do believe there is more than just two options to a problem and the way we communicate our ideas is as important as our objectives.
Tbug I totally agree that people believing in communism/socialsm have bad intentions, I think it’s really just the lack of knowledge and only looking at the idea of it, not the history.
You've described my entire life in one video 😭. I had and still have so many strict routines that are based in what feels "right" and what feels "wrong". I used to tell all the Lamps in my house goodnight before I went to bed as a kid. I had a really rough phase where I had to be "balanced" and so everything I did with one hand I had to do with the other, same with my feet. It was torture. We had these asshole neighbors that lived next to us for the past 10 years that we HATED. Well they moved a few months ago and I cried and had a huge freakout for a week straight because of it. I'm still having trouble getting used to it and the new neighbors that took their home. These videos make me feel so much better about myself cause it feels like I'm not alone And that there's an answer for the things that are going on inside my mind. I'm going to be talking with my therapist soon about the things that I've struggled with and my suspicions that it might be autism. In the meantime thank you for making these videos! ALSO: Oh my god, The professional world is so annoyingly filled with people not explaining things step by step and rigorously. I always ask my supervisors what I should do about a situation and they give me this floppy ass answers that don't make any sense and then I have a giant freak out because I don't know what to do because what they told me could be interpreted in 10 million different ways. I used to think that I just had bad bosses but it literally happens with every job I've ever had every position I've ever been in. Everybody in the office talks like this, and they look at me like I'm stupid when I ask them to be clear with what they're asking of me. I'm so tired of getting this look of, "Uh just use your common sense???" And I just want to scream "YOU'RE THE ONE NOT MAKING SENSE BECKY!!!" But hey I'm the dumb one 🙄. Why are people so bad at giving directions ahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!
the needing balance thing is why i wonder if i have OCD or autism potentially. it would feel disgusting unless i could do something perfectly the same way on both sides lol.
I am awful at moving. Like emotionally cannot handle it. I have been trying to move and unpacking has been difficult due to not having as much storage. I’ve been trying to buy more storage to replace it but that’s been an issue as well. Anyway, not knowing exactly where everything is, I have had a meltdown or two every single day in the past 3 days.
the fact that i have *ALL* of these symptoms since i was born 🤡 (the 10th symptom is something that i struggle SO MUCH because i don't have that "common sense", my brain only works with rules given to me, but my mom gets so MAD at me for asking those things because she thinks im doing it on purpose to make her mad, BUT I AM NOT!)
The thing about change and routine really gets to me though, bc I remember as a kid I really loved routine and hated change, and I complained a lot if things didn't happen the same way as always. But everyone around me (and most tv things tbh) kept saying that routine was bad and if you liked it then you'd go mad or be always stressed out/stressing other ppl so I think I made an effort to change that ? And it sorta worked bc now I still love and p much need routine to function, but I get anxious thinking that it will make me miserable in the long run so I try to plan as little as possible ::) I'm much more ok with change now tho, and that seems to have happened kinda naturally when I realised that things are always changing and that's just part of nature or smth
Omg!! There was one time when I accidentally took the wrong foot while getting up the stairs, but I was so stressed out and exhausted from life and just wanted to get into my room quickly. So I noticed it too late when I was already upstairs because it was the wrong foot that was making the first step upstairs so I ran back down and stood in front of the stairs trying to remember with which foot I had to start but I couldn't remember so I started to cry and ran up and down the stairs multiple times until it felt right. I swear, I love my autism most of the time, but these things just frustrate me soooo baaad 👎
I have wondered so many times why are people offended by facts. :D I got diagnosed after I was 40, finally my life was explained. But I still stick to my idea that I am only part human and part faery. I study humans and try to understand them like I've done all my life. That made me good at masking until I was so exhausted that I just can't anymore. Now I'm just very tired and want to be left alone with my immediate family.
My parents often explained to new learning-teacher people (tutors, teachers, school counsellors, etc.) that “Priscilla is concrete-sequential thinker, meaning she thinks in black-and-white and learns through step-by-step”
I relate so much to the questions part. They want to hear that exact thing but nobody's in their mind. I always say "why don't you give me a script? So I say what you want me to say".
Thank you for the common sense thing!! I remember being asked if I have common sense and feeling SO STUPID 🙁, so it helped to hear you say that! I can say it proudly without feeling embarrassed!
I'm autistic, was diagnosed pdd nos at 14 ( among other things). I relate so much to you. The reason I wanted to comment is, the water not wanting to get wet thing. If im not feeling getting wet at all some days then I'll avoid it at all costs. If I get wet when I strictly said I don't want to I will get so mad. Even if I happen to be in a swimsuit ! My grandmother used to pick on me she'd do dishes and get the whole neck of her shirt wet and when I'd ask why that doesn't upset her she'd say it's just water it'll dry. And if it was warm out that it would feel cooling to her. I'd recoil and shudder (like you did with the fabrics)and she'd just laugh at me all jokingly as if it's funny. She'd try to flick water at me with her fingers if I got near her enough in the kitchen. I'd laugh but I'd tell her to knock it off and I'd run away. I have a lot of the same things wrong that you do with your autism and frankly you're the only autistic person that I've ever been able to see myself in. And it makes me so happy rather than sad when I started watching your videos. Keep up the amazing work! Pretty please! 💜
One Thing That Gets Me Irritated Is When I Talk About Something For A Long Time, And Whoever I'm Talking With Changes The Subject. Another Thing If I Don't Know You, Then Don't Touch Me. Another Thing Is How My Eyes Are Sensitive To Light. When There Is Too Much Lights, I Have To Close My Eyes. I'm Also Very Sensitive To Noise As Well. Just One Trigger Can Give Me Body Shakes.
I’m not sure if I have autism that’s something we’re discussing in therapy but one time my dad asked for a drink mix so I brought him a sparkling water that was flavored with some mixed fruits. He didn’t want that so I brought him a chopstick because maybe he wanted to mix his drink with something. Then he said “I want a drink stick” so I brought him one of those coffee mixing sticks and he said “LOOK BY THE COFFEE MAKER!” That’s where I got the mixing stick though but I went to look anyways and couldn’t find what he wanted. Turns out he wanted one of those drink packets that you mix into your water.
Omg why didn't I know you had plants 😍 I've been hyperfixated on plants for almost 6 year now lol and I have over 400 houseplants. After discovering your channel I have self diagnosed myself with asd. I'm 99% sure and its helping me learn so much thank you
I think I probably have autism (I can't afford to get diagnosed right now, but I'm like ~95% sure at this point) and one big reason is that I often feel like a robot who needs very explicit programming in order to complete a task. Like maybe once I have a LOT of experience in something I can improvise, but it's all based on very exact and extensive knowledge? I also get really upset when my roommate puts the utensils in the dishwasher in the wrong order. For real how hard is it to always go (starting from the back right corner going counter clockwise) big spoons, little spoons, forks, butter knives, sharp knives, misc.? Sometimes she puts the big spoons and the little spoons together!!!?? So they touch!!!??? Utter chaos! /s my roomie is actually very nice and accommodating and I don't mind rearranging them myself every time lol
I was never officially diagnosed and instead was “diagnosed” by my parents when I was a baby, but all of these apply to me. They were a lot more intense when I was younger, and they’re still present, just some of them not as much. Not sure if my autism went away somehow or if I never even had it in the first place but this video’s still really relatable! I always need very direct explanations for things and have never thought I have common sense lol. Nothing is common sense, everything has to be specific
No. 4 I had to laugh so laud XD When I was 11 yrs old, I cried and said good bye to the old rice cooker, which is brocken. Oh... it was cold winter. The round formed mashine, which always served my family was just dumped... as soon as it's broken. These days I'm not that kind hearted, but I cherisch this memory ;) Plus... there are tons of single sock, they're waiting for their partner lol
I have found that when I explain why something is done. They get it..like keeping your shoes on at school or why you cant crouch down and run your hands on the radiator but if stand to do it it is fine. I let kids know I know how it doesnt make sense but you can still get what you want.
I cant tell you how many times I tell kids with Autism it is stupid but people want you do to it....they laugh and appear to say...okay...i can pretend as long as it is clear we both know its stupid.
I also love telling people about serial killers like Richard Ramirez and I have watched all those documentaries. On the face of it when you said each rule, I was like uhh I don’t think I do that, but then you gave examples and I was like uhhhhhhhh wait this definitely showed up for me as a kid and now it shows up for me in a different way, but I still exhibit this behavior, so now I’m starting to think that I might’ve been misdiagnosed with ADHD when I should’ve been diagnosed with asd
I don't have a diagnosis (yet, I'm working on it) and this video described me absolutely perfectly! It's weird, because I always assume, my experience is universal, but it apparently is not :D
Okay so I'm not all the way through with the video but you mentioned Chris Watts ...that's really all I got lol. I felt my excitement rise immediately and wanted to just start explaining everything about him to someone but there's no one around that I haven't explained that story to.🤣
This was a very good and informative video! "I don't know how to be human so I would like instructions" - Me when I watch society, culture and psycology documentaries for hours daily to se how humans human around the world. And have been, historicaly.. :D
wow...I swear the not knowing when to stop talking thing is so me...I'll start telling my family something I literally watched and I'll give them the entire backstory to the point they tell me to just go back to my room and give them some peace.
My sensory issue is touching dishes that were left in the sink.
I just can't stand when oils and juices from all of the dishes combine and cover all of the dishes from all sides.
I have a weird one where if one hand is wet and the other isnt it drives me insane so i have to run the other hand under water too 😆
@@courtnrysalamone7677 water and pressure (touch) do that to me.. on feet also 🙈
@Katie Esterline I'll actually look for them.. thanks 😊
I used to lick my hand if one was wet and the other wasn’t and people used to look at me like I was insane 😭 like bro I can’t handle it I’m sorry!!!
Mine is were i can only shower with hot water and wash my hands with hot water
"I feel like an alien that has come down to this earth"
I've never resonated with this statement so much lol.
When I was little I also thought that I was an alien or "the chosen one" some sort of so I often did stuff to be sick or hurt (lightly) so my parents could send me to the doctor and check my blood. I though if the doctor checked my blood they will notice that I'm not of this planet XD.
Omg when I was younger I thought I was a fairy or someone from another planet. Like genuinely believed I was an alien who had been sent to infiltrate the human race then had my memory wiped because I couldn’t blend in. And the mother ship went. Though I couldn’t work out what I wasn’t doing right or anything just that I was considered weird (blissfully in my own world). It wasn’t until a teacher told, me I needed to be “more normal” so that “people would stop picking on me”. In year 7 that I realised.
My family used to say that I was abducted, now I see all the signs through all my life and be "oh"
yeessssss
that sentence left me jaw dropped. im undiagnosed but exploring.
i was shocked because i've literally told one of my therapists that if an alien came to me and said that they're bringing me home, i wouldn't be surprised. in fact, i may feel relieved as it would explain why i feel SO out of touch with this world.
I'm going to stop using the term "common sense" so freely now. It is something I didn't realize was generally neurotypical. Thanks for teaching me.
Neither. I just assumed it was something I didn’t have for some reason and yet everyone was telling me that it was obvious you can basically replace “common sense” with that. Also I had no idea on the ways these traits could present and took the dsm criteria literally and didn’t realise it could show in different ways.
There’s the quote by Einstein that common sense is just a bunch of prejudices your mind acquires before you’re eighteen.
As an ADHDer who does suffer from this lack of “common” sense I really appreciate that.. for me it’s a daily struggle, and currently at work it happens a lot when my boss tells me to do something in a way that for me isn’t understandable. I need things to be said to me in a very specific way and very informative, I need the reason behind it in order to get the “sense” behind the task, without it I cannot conclude it myself like other people can. And it’s so frustrating to get his judgmental face, telling me that it takes a lot of patience to explain to me things, or just giving up on asking me to do something knowing I probably won’t understand (instead of him trying to understand that the way he talks isn’t so understandable to everyone) and that just hurts. So thank you, because “common sense” to one person isn’t very common for the other
I feel like not having been diagnosed until I was 34 forced me to break some of those habits, but I'm definitely on the inanimate object train, because I have a blanket and we have been through some shit.
Gave me a chuckle. I still have not been diagnosed, but a professional I spoke with said she would not be surprised if I am on the spectrum. In these sorts of videos I sometimes think "well I'm not really like that", but I can recall being very much like that when I was younger. Additionally, I can see remnants of some of those traits now.
The unusually strong attachment to things? Oh that I can really relate to. I once slammed a friend into a door because he was touching a watch that was given to me by a relative, after I told him not to touch it. I would get absolutely furious about people touching some of my stuff. My bike was sacred. My watch was sacred. My video games were sacred. I couldn't part with these things even if I didn't use them or if they didn't work anymore.
If I am on the spectrum, I think it's safe to say that I've learned to mask very well in many ways. Not so well in a few. I'm looking into being evaluated in the near future. But I was told it can be difficult to find someone who will evaluate someone well into adulthood.
I'm 34 and I've never been diagnosed, but a lot of this resonates with me, so I enjoy watching regardless. Same with my husband- though, he doesn't sleep with a stuffed animal and greet it with a kiss and a squeeze every morning as I do. 😳 I feel compelled. 😅
I can tell if someone replaced "my controller" for my playstation2 because I can feel the difference. And yes, I did get upset when my brother used to switch it out while I was gone xD
I was diagnosed in early twenties and it's the same for me as well. I learnt how to deal with change and adapt. It is still going to make me grumpy but I am not going to have a meltdown.
As a kid to teen, I would read tones of books. Every book I owned was special because we weren't rich so I couldn't just go out and buy a book. When I was 13 and we (my mom, sister and I) were moving out in hurry using the fact that my father was at work (great source of mental and emotional abuse, and probably a PTSD, thanks, dad) and my mom was like we don't have time or room to pack all your books rn. When I tell you, I had a MAJOR panic attack/meltdown/breakdown/whatever. I always had a very emotional attachment to books and stories. I love the saying that "A reader lives a thousand lives" and that "When I read a new book, it's like I meet a new friend. And when I read a book I've read before, it's like meeting an old friend". I never really got attached to people, like "out of sight, out of mind". But the books 😭. Also one of mom's friends was at our place and seeing me with a fantasy book (I would also drag a book with me to school, family events, traveling etc.) said "she'll grow out of it"... Another meltdown, it felt like someone just clawed into a corner stone of my identity and tore it out of my soul". I despise that man to this day. I actually started sobbing and rocking from recalling those events, lol.
I wonder how much of these things get drowned out or smothered when going undiagnosed for so long. I’m in my 30’s and though I did/probably did a lot of those stuff when I was a kid a lot got beat/punished out of me.
Same!!
I really relate to that. I mask so much that my symptoms are not obvious to others and I don’t even know if it’s worth trying to be diagnosed, because I probably won’t be believed. But I was always punished for exhibiting these traits, and that made childhood a very confusing time for me.
@@noranelson1339 I mask a lot and was able to get a diagnosis. I think it’s possible, especially if you work on unmasking a bit before your appointment. But some doctors are horrible and it also takes some luck to find a good one who’s up to date on autism
I feel this exact same way
Truer words have never been said...wait, you weren't talking about me.
All jokes aside, I learned how to suppress meltdowns as a kid because I was always punished when I had them. So I did the only thing I could to survive, and subsequently had countless shutdowns over the rest of my childhood and did far more damage to myself than I ever could have to other people (my meltdowns were never physically violent btw, I mean emotional damage)
Paige you are a life saver, you’re the reason I’m talking to my therapist about autism. I’ve always known I’m different and finding you has made me realize I’m not “broken” or “wrong” and I am so greatfull!!
Literally. Thanks to autistic creators making videos about what it's like to be autistic, especially as a girl/woman, and the comments below those videos, I gained so much self love and sense of self worth. I talked to my mom about my suspecions, and made a list of traits that I definitely relate to (the needing clear instructions one in this video hit really hard, too) and she said she thinks I might be autistic too and wants to help me seek diagnosis (I kinda self identify at this point but for some reason I don't think I'll feel quite a member of the community until I have been officially diagnosed). It's like the way I am, and think, and feel, and perceive the world, and interact with it, as well as with people around me, finally makes sense and doesn't feel like I'm a weirdo. High five! :)
@@Kasiarzynka me as well, at 30 I finally have clarity as to what my brain is doing that is autism. Back in highschool I got so frustrated trying to understand a math question that all the other students around me understood but I for some reason could not no matter how many times I would read and reread the question I eventually got so frustrated I started crying. My teacher at the time just looked at me and could not fathom as to why I was so frustrated with just this one question she looked at me and she said " the question is as plain as the sky is blue I don't understand how you don't understand this" and I started bawling.... explaining that I couldn't understand over and over. ( I have many more moments like this in my life and now I understand that there is a name to it. Autism.
I'm ADHD with an autistic sibling, and there's some things that work really well with that combo (infodumping, wanting steps spelled out) and really Not. Like, I fundamentally hate things to be boring. Repetitive things are boring, so I try to switch things up at every opportunity. My little sister... not so much. "Hey, let's just dink around and see what happens!" "How about we don't" "Why not? It'll be fun" "I don't think so" lol. I forget stuff a lot too, so sometimes I'll say I'll do something and forget, which for her is breaking a promise. Breaking promises is basically a federal crime in her eyes. I actually really like that about her, I like her bluntness, and I admire how she can be so dedicated to one or two things that she figures out all the tiny details about it. We don't always get along but we love each other
I almost cried when she talked about inanimate objects bc I actually went through a lot of mental distress over furniture, plants etc. I used to visit and talk to our old couch that we put out on the street and cried when I realized it got taken with the garbage. I also would pet and talk to every single Christmas tree I saw on the sidewalk after Xmas bc I didn’t want them to feel bad or lonely :’)
Omg Paige, this is me. I haven’t been diagnosed yet, but my kids did. I’m in the process and already had my 1st appointment of 2 + hours. I wasn’t great that day and unable to process anything b/c I had my kids with me. But guess what? I just turned 42. People don’t believe my age nor that I’m in the spectrum.
I have pretty severe ADHD and have a lot of these traits as well and it was really interesting to hear about them from another perspective. Also, you look stunning today!
I have ADHD and have recently started realising that I have a lot of Autistic traits too. I'm hypersensitive to sound and textures in food, I often have a hard time understanding Sarcasm and I take things literally a lot, I have difficulty knowing when i'm hungry, thirsty or tired and will often go the entire day without eating anything if no one reminds me, I have intense obsessions that often last for many months or years, I have trouble completing assignments for school if they do not have very specific instructions and guidelines, I get stressed and upset if something I have planned for and tend to follow the same routine most days and can get stressed if it is majorly disturbed, I personify objects and get really emotionally attached to them, And I often get overwhelmed in seemingly normal situations (usually social situations) and find it hard to talk much and sorting things into piles, and I fidget and Stim alot. No one has ever suggested that I might be Autistic but have been doing alot of research and I identify with a lot of the symptoms and I took all of the tests in Page's video where she took them and got autism likely scores on all of them, given that, the research i've done, and the high comorbidity rate between ADHD and Autism I think it might be worth trying to bring it up to my family and get a diagnosis but i'm not sure, any thougts?
Definitely bring it up at your next appointment! It's absolutely worth mentioning to the doctor if you are wanting to pursue a formal diagnosis for any reason. I'm working on something similar now myself. Best of luck, friend! :)
@@rinprime7010 Thank you!
See, the thing is, I have most of these traits now as an adult. And I remember having some when I was younger. But, due to trauma I don't hold many memories from childhood, and I can't tell if I am the way that I am because of autism, adhd, or due to my childhood trauma. It's frustrating.
You have helped me so much, I'm actually currently looking into getting a proper autism diagnosis. The only things I knew about autism were related to "little boys" and how autism is persevered from an outsider. Having autism explained by someone who is actually autistic, what it actually feels like, has been exactly what I need. Thank you.
This background comforts me
Nailed it. All the way to "and I would like instruction." If only they would be specific and let me ask questions! I am trying so hard to learn how to be a good human.
I love the little "reenactments" of each trait. They're so relatable. The change thing is funny, I've been thinking about that a lot lately because I always thought of myself as the kind of person who is very open to new things, but as I've examined the patterns in my behavior over the years, I've realized that although I am drawn to novelty, I am simultaneously terrified of unpredictability. The rules bit cracks me up because that's a constant struggle for me at work. "The invoice has a section that is clearly marked 'customer shipping.' Why would you put the address under 'production notes?' That doesn't make any sense at all! I need to be able to know where to look to find what I need." I also drive my coworkers batty sometimes with the last trait. You can't just give me a project by telling me the end goal and expecting me to figure out the rest. I need to know, or at least have enough information to deduce, step by step, how to get there. Thanks for making these vids.
Oh my heavens, watching you was like watching a grown up version of my 6 year old daughter! Especially the sensory issues and her reactions when her expectations are not met. She is my sweetheart though and learning how her mind works both fascinates and exhausts me every day. Exhausted because I worry so much over her future as an autistic person. Watching your videos give me hope that she can grow up well and is not doomed to a terrible life. Thank you for sharing!
Wow the way you explained the paragraph/school related instructions thing HITS DIFFERENT. For one of my final papers last year in Uni, I had to have three different people explain the prompt to me before I could even think about starting to write it because I was so overwhelmed by the possibilities 😅🤦🏼♀️
I do not have autism, but I've always felt a deep connection to certain inanimate objects, I always feel so bad for my stuffies if I throw them on the floor when I'm mad, and things like that :')
i feel like most people are on the spectrum.
Paigeeee! Wtf you need to be an actor in a dramedy! You are hilarious and I am so proud of how much your platform has grown.
I LOVE how you did this video! The shortclips of you portraying what you talked about was so good! This video is so well informed ❤
Finally someone gave me examples 😩 I was thinking about routine in a completly different way. Thank you
Oh I really appreciate the multiple example scenarios you gave! Often when I just hear the statement I start to think that “nah, I don’t really experience this, do I?” BUt when examples are given more often than not I go “ehhh.. yup, I totally do that!”
Special shoutout to toothbrushes - I feel bad for them when I have to toss them, so I always put them in the package of the replacement before throwing them away because that way they at least have it a bit nicer????? Bahaha
the rules thing is spot on. if i get assigned an essay at school and they don't tell me how many paragraphs it needs, how many sentences need to be in each paragraph, and an example opening paragraph, i will most likely cry out of stress of not knowing what to do. WHY DO THEY STOP ALLOWING ESSAY OUTLINES AFTER MIDDLE SCHOOL
9:20 I feel called out 😭 the fact that I was literally just crying about how my house is being renovated and it looks different from the backyard
The furniture scene reminded me of this one time when my parents moved the furniture and I don’t think it bothered me at the time, I may have even been exited about it, but I remember a couple months later I wanted to re-arrange it on my own and was going to put one of the couches in the same spot that it used to be.
I am not diagnosed with autism, but I am diagnosed with OCD and ADD and a LOT of these traits match up perfectly with me! Especially the special interests & routines. I can sit and look at maps for hours and hours & talk about geography forever and I know that it drives people insane but I physically cannot help it. I also deal with many debilitating routines that, if not performed correctly, make me physically ill until I can get them completed in the right way.
I don't know if I still have weird routines, but when I was about four years old, every time we got home, I insisted that I be the first to step on our "stoop" (the small step before the door outside the house) and say "put my foot on the stoop" as I did it. If someone else did it first, I would cry and we would have to go all the way back to the car and start over!
Also, I had no idea about the strong empathy toward inanimate objects thing. Why is that related to autism? I always thought I was like that because I consider my self an "empath" (hyper-empathetic), which is probably related to autism. I say goodbye to my toothbrushes when I throw them away and think about how sad they will be in the dump, I bite animal-shaped foods' heads off first to minimize suffering, and I'm still not convinced that my dear stuffed animals are not alive. Basically, I need to remind myself often that non-living things have no wants, needs, or feelings. 😅
That being said, nobody ever observed possible autism in me until recently, and I still have no diagnosis.
My routine is: getting up at 10 a.m., lying in bed for an additional 1-1.5 hour, going breakfast, hanging on my phone for an additional hour, then deciding what to do for the day, doodling a bit or working on my stories, on my phone another hour, mentally prepare for preparing dinner at 5 p.m., actually preparing dinner at 6 p.m., eating dinner at 7 p.m. and occasionally talk with my father, going upstairs and drawing a bit or hanging on my phone, making tea after half an hour, staying up late until midnight. staying up an additional hour until 1 a.m. Going to sleep.
Sadly my routine doesn't align at all with the routine I was SUPPOSED to follow due to university :( And that's why I get worn out so easily if I have to go to university and do stuff for it. I also suffer under depression, missed a whole semester of uni and lost all of friends because they were ableist, that's why my schedule got "messed up" :(
Male, 58, and identified as autistic at 55. Now I understand so much more about myself and why I am the way I am. My 1st wife used to spontaneously paint different rooms in the house and/or rearrange furniture to relieve her boredom and the tedium of sameness. (It was really unnerving to be honest.) But I never pushed back because as an undiagnosed youth, I was conditioned for compliance to the point of CPTSD by an authoritarian father who thought he could beat me into a good boy. (His own version of ABA, I guess.) All of this, the OCD-looking traits, the routines, the safety in repetition and rules, the dysregulation of change all applies to me to such an extent that I am confused why I was never identified as autistic prior to my retirement.
My sensory issues: always too bright outside when ANY sunshine peeks through the clouds, temperature (being too hot or too cold), clothing material & textures, socks & shoes never feel quite right, like they are sliding down my feet or the shoes are always too loose or too tight, never secure. Loud bass subwoofers, or sharp loud noises are the worst. I am a sensory seeker for colorful, sparkly, glittery, tie-dyed, rainbow stuff (contrasted against goth black mostly). I am also an auditory sensory seeker for any calming audio stimulation with low BPM (beats per minute), little dynamic variation and without lyrics to distract my attention.
It’s a little worrying that I can relate to all of these in my mid twenties
I liked the "take the garbage out" bit because the way Canadians say "bag" and "out" is so satisfying
I feel better after telling everyone that I had more of a communication block. I couldn't say the right thing to match the way they want me to say things. I noticed I don't know how to take photos, I get a blank stare every photo. It so hard to follow social structures. I just feel like disappearing sometimes.
1. No.
2. No.
3. Yes, but not as extreme as example
4. No more than most people, unless you could arranging toys into families and having a hard time getting rid of them because you don't want to split up the families.
5. Yes, but usually more than two and they come and go and sometimes return.
6. Sometimes, but they have to have the weaker signs of disinterest and depends on person I'm talking to and the circumstance. Sometimes I do it because I can't think of another topic, the other person feels uncomfortable with the lack of talking, but can't think of something to talk about. Sometimes because I feel like it's something that needs to be heard regardless as if the person is interested.
7. Depends on what type of change.
8. Kinda, but not as extreme as the example and less judgmental on people and more on the actions. I am very strict in my standards, but respect those who do not share the same beliefs. I see tiny facts within larger facts explaining them.
9. Not really.
10. Yes, but not as extreme as example.
I've been diagnosed in my early elementary years.
This made me think about so many things in my life
Happy Birthday !
Oh my God the wind. I could not yesterday I had a complete meltdown just because of the wind and I really needed Brown sugar but I could not walk to the further grocery store because of the wind. Life struggles
a couple nights ago my family and I went out for dinner and when we went back to the car the wind was SO FUCKING COLD I HATED IT
It's something about the mannerisms that are so relatable- like when you were info dumping and you were handing onto the back of the chair and sort of drifting about your area and the fuckin. Open hand fingertaps on the table to enunciate your words- I've done ALL of that while talking about nrms lmao
thank you for describing me at your age. i'm 49 now, and still struggle, but it does get " easier" at times. you learn from your experiences. and we learn to fake it. and a lot of times, it's just easier to just stop. stop, regroup, venture out again. the few real friends we have, know. they know it's us, and it's not our or their fault. that there's nothing wrong, just know that we have to work things out...the changes, the schedules, etc
the thing is i dont remember anything from when i was a like a little kid, like when you say child how young? but i definitely remember the never shutting up thing
I love that you used examples in your video to help explain the signs! It helps a lot!
I know this is off topic but those wingtips (eyelashes) are ON POINT.
Hahah the clothes tag thing is so relatable, I remove them off of all my clothes!
I got diagnosed with ADHD 2 years ago (at 22) and I've been doing a lot of research to learn about myself and how I work.
It's been difficult trying to figure out if the things I'm feeling are due to my ADHD, or because I might also be on the Autism spectrum as well. I know they have overlapping symptoms, but the reasons for why they occur are different. I feel some things I do might be linked to Autsim rather than ADHD, but it's really hard to tell. Some things I'm strict about, some things I can adjust to. Some things have to be the same, some things I want new and refreshed. Which is what happens with people on both spectrums.
I'll have to do more research, and when I see my therapist next in a few week I'll bring it up to her, but all I can say is I'm very confused :( so thank you for making videos like this that are really easy to understand with easy to understand language and examples, it's so helpful! ♥
Your facial expressions are so good; you would have made a great silent film star. I bet you can do a video without saying a word.
This video is really helpful because it makes me realise that the autism classification doesn't fit me that well. A lot of people have told me that I appear autistic. But, I am not driven by routines and I am relatively unbothered by moderate stimulation. Of course, everyone has feels they don't like, for example old sponges and oily/sticky fingers. But otherwise I crave texture and enjoy variety. The thing is though, I need precise clear instructions and prescribed routines to follow otherwise I forget things. There's many things that make me wonder if I have adhd more than autism. My therapist isn't sure and I'm not that motivated to explain my reasoning - the only area quite affected currently by my brain habits is work, and previously I've had very accommodating and compassionate supervisors which is why nothing ever came up until now.
My entire life is forcing myself to be okay and go against every single one of these
But this is what it sounds like in my head CONSTANTLY
The same thing goes for my ADHD
I’m laughing so hard right now because I thought the stuff you were talking about in the special interest section was all common knowledge. I’ve recently realized that I do this a lot with very specific information
4:38 that’s so me 😂 I will just stand still not breathing while feeling if an outfit is going to work and then all of a sudden screaming at it while ripping it off 😅
resonated with a lot of your list.
Corderoy is the worst! Also i hate being sticky. also repettitive sounds are the worst -- especially mouth sounds (like my dog licking).
food textures are difficult. (coconut is the worst) when i was little it was "thingies" if a food or drink had an unidentifiyable foreign object i couldn't do it.
my black and white lines are gray, i'm not black and white about my black and white rules. lol. i don't understand my own logic about the things that matter vs the things that don't. *shrugs*
Happy Birthday you amazing wonderful person. You are amazing and wonderful, and you are just so great. So Happy Birthday!
Dear whoever is reading this, I wish there was a way for everyone to surpass the current obstacles or sadness/ stress and let happiness enter your heart! i truly sense and know you will have a beautiful life ahead of you! Nothing in life is ever easy, but what's important is that YOU keep going!
Youre worthy of love and happiness, never allow anyone to tell you otherwise! I wish all of you plenty of health and strength during these tough times. You are loved, you are strong, you got this! Never forget that!
Sending much Love over from Germany ♥️♥️♥️
Hey there kind stranger! Thank you so much for your lovely thoughtful message 😊 It really reached someone that needed to hear this today. I hope all these things for you too! Love in return from the U.S.! 💖
Thank you for this!
I actually highly related with half of things and have the EXACT opposite experience with the other half
I have sensory issues, weird interests, info dumping, getting attached to items and acting like they are sentient, but routine is a NIGHTMARE, If a schedule keeps up for more than a week it will start getting exhausting. However, I can't handle major change. Moving house or changing location? One of my biggest nightmares. I am currently away from home for almost 2 months and it has been a nightmare, when what I am doing is a vacation for most people. I am also a very grey person and I tend to be a huge people pleaser. So much that it can be harmful to me. I also can't distinguish when someone is mean to me because I look at the matter grey-ly (for example: "What if their tone was just off? What is theey are just having a bad day?What if their niceness is fake?") with things that when others see them, they can instantly tell that this action is wrong or just simple kindness
I also have way too many interests, and I change each week what I want to do, which has lead me to hundreds of unfinished goals and me being a jack of all trades but ace of none
I have suspected for a long time myself of adhd and tried seeking help but no one believed me and I struggled with expressing myself more clearly due to the pressure of being asked personal questions shutting me even more, so it has lead nowhere so far
Me (being told that I definitely am nurotyipical all my life by my parents)
Also me:
-setting the table and always sitting in the same spot
-gotta put out a shrine (not religious just because it feels right) and then swinging (never before or else)
-freaking out when the stairs are un even (NO)
-Walking on toes (since I first started walking) because NO EWW THE HEEL FEEL IS TINGLY
-meltdown and shut down at STICKYNESD I HATE HATE HATE IT
-ROCK SMOOTH
-punched a kid when I was younger because they touched my stuffed animal then cried
-HATE when people toutch my stuff because it now feels wrong
-GREEK MYTHOLOGY AND PSYCHOLOGY IN THE FITH GRADE (not inspired by Percy Jackson)
-got in trouble all of the time for talking too mutch and not getting the que to stop until the teacher moved me to the problem child area
-(fact above made me almost get held back)
-caused me to stop but will ramble non stop to myself
-DAYLIGHT SAVINGS NO NO NO NO NO
-stay on script WHY WOULD YOU CHANGE THE SCRIPT
-I PLANED MY OUTFIT AND MY STEPS NOOO WHY
-I said and I quote to someone when they asked how their shirt looks “ It doesn’t match your personality, makes you look fake and rude also makes you look ugly” wasn’t trying to say they were ugly just the shirt didn’t match
-“WHY DID YOU BREAK THE GLASS” “ YOU SAID TO THROW IT IN THE SINK”
-took off my shoes (also got into many arguments about this) because it felt wrong (idk why)
Happy Birthday! Thanks for making this video and this channel! I'm an Occupational Therapy Assistant that plans to work more with autistic children and provide them with a safe and supportive environment. This video was super helpful and I will keep your channel in mind as reference for treating those kiddos! Thank you again! Hope your birthday went fantastic!
Happy belated birthday Paige
These are all true. I do have black and white thinking at times, and I used to be more blunt and honest at times, and that caused issues in my youth. I do struggle with common sense. The whole being an alien on planet earth is soo true. I operate on such a different, maginitude, wavelength, frequency than the average human being does. I have too many emotions for the average male, and unconventional and eccentric interests, but i felt like I had to mask, and masking is soo hard because i fail at it lol. I do love routine, and i don't mind change, unless it's under my own accord and set rules.
Sometimes my autism, clashes with society, because I operate so differently, and where im from, mental health, disabilities, nerdiness are stigmatized
I am about to embark on teaching my autistic husband to learn how to drive. I've already started making mental lists of everything I do while driving. like the 15 steps I do between sitting in the drivers seat to turning on the ignition. I want him to be as comfortable driving as he can be, so I'm trying to break it down into the smallest steps for him so he can learn in a routine. Its really mentally exhausting, but it just made me realise that I only have to do the mental work to accommodate him some of the time, but he has to do the work to try and "fit in" ALL of the time.
My niece was diagnosed with autism not too long ago. Her and I are very much alike, so are very close. And it was mind blowing to me to learn she had this. And then I have a very close friend, who has known me for a long time, say I had autistic traits. I guess its just been floating in the back of my head for awhile now and then this video popped up. And there are a lot of things in this video that i can strongly relate to. And its kind of scary. One or two things, maybe. But it was most of that list. I don't know how to feel about it. I mean, this is just how I've always been. I've never seen anyone, and no one has ever said anything besides the one friend I have (I dont talk to anyone else). So, unsure what to do lol. But, this video is very educational non the less and its greatly appreciated. Please continue doing what you're doing :)
Please take a look at what was happening in Soviet Union (whose goal was communism even though they only achieved socialism), how the government was treating people, how many died or had they life destroyed. Capitalism is deffinetely not perfect yet it’s the best out of all the options. I’m sorry, I know this is not what the video is about, but I’m from the CZ and things happening here when we were in the SU were just awful.
No.
Yes! I'm from Lithuania so I understand, at least you guys were a satellite state, we were completely of the maps for 50 years :')
There’s this saying about history that proves true, “those who cannot remember the past are doomed to repeat it.” As someone who grew up in a cult, I cringe when I see populist movements on the left and right, though I prefer the ones that respect the rights of humans, that are not just white cis males. They both use labels and taking points, from past failed authoritarian regimes, most vilify anyone who doesn’t agree with them, many tap into people’s anger and fear. They overpromise and underdeliver, except to those who’s main concern is power. It’s so easy to believe the ends justify the means, without history being your guide. To be clear I’m not trying to imply bad motives of people who believe in communism or socialism. I do believe there is more than just two options to a problem and the way we communicate our ideas is as important as our objectives.
Aquarius Solaris Well what’s your argument? Also I forgot to mention how many people starved to death because of communism
Tbug I totally agree that people believing in communism/socialsm have bad intentions, I think it’s really just the lack of knowledge and only looking at the idea of it, not the history.
You've described my entire life in one video 😭. I had and still have so many strict routines that are based in what feels "right" and what feels "wrong".
I used to tell all the Lamps in my house goodnight before I went to bed as a kid.
I had a really rough phase where I had to be "balanced" and so everything I did with one hand I had to do with the other, same with my feet. It was torture.
We had these asshole neighbors that lived next to us for the past 10 years that we HATED. Well they moved a few months ago and I cried and had a huge freakout for a week straight because of it. I'm still having trouble getting used to it and the new neighbors that took their home.
These videos make me feel so much better about myself cause it feels like I'm not alone And that there's an answer for the things that are going on inside my mind. I'm going to be talking with my therapist soon about the things that I've struggled with and my suspicions that it might be autism. In the meantime thank you for making these videos!
ALSO: Oh my god, The professional world is so annoyingly filled with people not explaining things step by step and rigorously. I always ask my supervisors what I should do about a situation and they give me this floppy ass answers that don't make any sense and then I have a giant freak out because I don't know what to do because what they told me could be interpreted in 10 million different ways. I used to think that I just had bad bosses but it literally happens with every job I've ever had every position I've ever been in. Everybody in the office talks like this, and they look at me like I'm stupid when I ask them to be clear with what they're asking of me. I'm so tired of getting this look of,
"Uh just use your common sense???" And I just want to scream
"YOU'RE THE ONE NOT MAKING SENSE BECKY!!!"
But hey I'm the dumb one 🙄. Why are people so bad at giving directions ahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!
the needing balance thing is why i wonder if i have OCD or autism potentially. it would feel disgusting unless i could do something perfectly the same way on both sides lol.
I am awful at moving. Like emotionally cannot handle it. I have been trying to move and unpacking has been difficult due to not having as much storage. I’ve been trying to buy more storage to replace it but that’s been an issue as well. Anyway, not knowing exactly where everything is, I have had a meltdown or two every single day in the past 3 days.
Thanks so much! This is the perfect thing to send to my family so they'll understand my diagnosis better!
the fact that i have *ALL* of these symptoms since i was born 🤡
(the 10th symptom is something that i struggle SO MUCH because i don't have that "common sense", my brain only works with rules given to me, but my mom gets so MAD at me for asking those things because she thinks im doing it on purpose to make her mad, BUT I AM NOT!)
Just as important as realizing what you have...this helped me realize what I didn't. Kudos
The thing about change and routine really gets to me though, bc I remember as a kid I really loved routine and hated change, and I complained a lot if things didn't happen the same way as always. But everyone around me (and most tv things tbh) kept saying that routine was bad and if you liked it then you'd go mad or be always stressed out/stressing other ppl so I think I made an effort to change that ? And it sorta worked bc now I still love and p much need routine to function, but I get anxious thinking that it will make me miserable in the long run so I try to plan as little as possible ::) I'm much more ok with change now tho, and that seems to have happened kinda naturally when I realised that things are always changing and that's just part of nature or smth
Happy belated birthday Paige!
Omg!! There was one time when I accidentally took the wrong foot while getting up the stairs, but I was so stressed out and exhausted from life and just wanted to get into my room quickly. So I noticed it too late when I was already upstairs because it was the wrong foot that was making the first step upstairs so I ran back down and stood in front of the stairs trying to remember with which foot I had to start but I couldn't remember so I started to cry and ran up and down the stairs multiple times until it felt right. I swear, I love my autism most of the time, but these things just frustrate me soooo baaad 👎
So helpful that you added the examples! Thank you
I love how you made the skits now :)
My stuffed animals definitely have feelings and hurting them would literally be the worst thing anyone could do.
I have wondered so many times why are people offended by facts. :D I got diagnosed after I was 40, finally my life was explained. But I still stick to my idea that I am only part human and part faery. I study humans and try to understand them like I've done all my life. That made me good at masking until I was so exhausted that I just can't anymore. Now I'm just very tired and want to be left alone with my immediate family.
"If you think being fat is an insult, that's your problem" KILLED ME OMG
Happy birthday!
Also, so many of these things ring true for me. Not all of them, by any means, but enough. Another great video :)
My parents often explained to new learning-teacher people (tutors, teachers, school counsellors, etc.) that “Priscilla is concrete-sequential thinker, meaning she thinks in black-and-white and learns through step-by-step”
Happy belated birthday, you look lovely!! It's amazing to find like minded people like me online who I have stuff in common with.
I relate so much to the questions part. They want to hear that exact thing but nobody's in their mind. I always say "why don't you give me a script? So I say what you want me to say".
Thank you for the common sense thing!! I remember being asked if I have common sense and feeling SO STUPID 🙁, so it helped to hear you say that! I can say it proudly without feeling embarrassed!
everytime you cut to a scenario i felt like i was watching clips of myself
I'm autistic, was diagnosed pdd nos at 14 ( among other things). I relate so much to you. The reason I wanted to comment is, the water not wanting to get wet thing.
If im not feeling getting wet at all some days then I'll avoid it at all costs. If I get wet when I strictly said I don't want to I will get so mad. Even if I happen to be in a swimsuit ! My grandmother used to pick on me she'd do dishes and get the whole neck of her shirt wet and when I'd ask why that doesn't upset her she'd say it's just water it'll dry. And if it was warm out that it would feel cooling to her. I'd recoil and shudder (like you did with the fabrics)and she'd just laugh at me all jokingly as if it's funny. She'd try to flick water at me with her fingers if I got near her enough in the kitchen. I'd laugh but I'd tell her to knock it off and I'd run away. I have a lot of the same things wrong that you do with your autism and frankly you're the only autistic person that I've ever been able to see myself in. And it makes me so happy rather than sad when I started watching your videos. Keep up the amazing work! Pretty please! 💜
I was diagnosed at 43 but vividly remember whenever my parents would ask for ice water I would ask "how many pieces of ice do you want?"
One Thing That Gets Me Irritated Is When I Talk About Something For A Long Time, And Whoever I'm Talking With Changes The Subject. Another Thing If I Don't Know You, Then Don't Touch Me. Another Thing Is How My Eyes Are Sensitive To Light. When There Is Too Much Lights, I Have To Close My Eyes. I'm Also Very Sensitive To Noise As Well. Just One Trigger Can Give Me Body Shakes.
I’m not sure if I have autism that’s something we’re discussing in therapy but one time my dad asked for a drink mix so I brought him a sparkling water that was flavored with some mixed fruits. He didn’t want that so I brought him a chopstick because maybe he wanted to mix his drink with something. Then he said “I want a drink stick” so I brought him one of those coffee mixing sticks and he said “LOOK BY THE COFFEE MAKER!” That’s where I got the mixing stick though but I went to look anyways and couldn’t find what he wanted. Turns out he wanted one of those drink packets that you mix into your water.
Traits only shouldn't be diagnosed. My son had meltdowns over brushing teeth.
Omg why didn't I know you had plants 😍 I've been hyperfixated on plants for almost 6 year now lol and I have over 400 houseplants. After discovering your channel I have self diagnosed myself with asd. I'm 99% sure and its helping me learn so much thank you
I think I probably have autism (I can't afford to get diagnosed right now, but I'm like ~95% sure at this point) and one big reason is that I often feel like a robot who needs very explicit programming in order to complete a task. Like maybe once I have a LOT of experience in something I can improvise, but it's all based on very exact and extensive knowledge?
I also get really upset when my roommate puts the utensils in the dishwasher in the wrong order. For real how hard is it to always go (starting from the back right corner going counter clockwise) big spoons, little spoons, forks, butter knives, sharp knives, misc.? Sometimes she puts the big spoons and the little spoons together!!!?? So they touch!!!??? Utter chaos!
/s my roomie is actually very nice and accommodating and I don't mind rearranging them myself every time lol
i cried for days when my mom gave my huge unicorn plush away. where are you, chloe? who has you now? give her back
I relate to way to many of these for my liking
I was never officially diagnosed and instead was “diagnosed” by my parents when I was a baby, but all of these apply to me. They were a lot more intense when I was younger, and they’re still present, just some of them not as much. Not sure if my autism went away somehow or if I never even had it in the first place but this video’s still really relatable! I always need very direct explanations for things and have never thought I have common sense lol. Nothing is common sense, everything has to be specific
No. 4 I had to laugh so laud XD When I was 11 yrs old, I cried and said good bye to the old rice cooker, which is brocken.
Oh... it was cold winter. The round formed mashine, which always served my family was just dumped... as soon as it's broken. These days I'm not that kind hearted, but I cherisch this memory ;)
Plus... there are tons of single sock, they're waiting for their partner lol
I have found that when I explain why something is done. They get it..like keeping your shoes on at school or why you cant crouch down and run your hands on the radiator but if stand to do it it is fine. I let kids know I know how it doesnt make sense but you can still get what you want.
I cant tell you how many times I tell kids with Autism it is stupid but people want you do to it....they laugh and appear to say...okay...i can pretend as long as it is clear we both know its stupid.
I also love telling people about serial killers like Richard Ramirez and I have watched all those documentaries. On the face of it when you said each rule, I was like uhh I don’t think I do that, but then you gave examples and I was like uhhhhhhhh wait this definitely showed up for me as a kid and now it shows up for me in a different way, but I still exhibit this behavior, so now I’m starting to think that I might’ve been misdiagnosed with ADHD when I should’ve been diagnosed with asd
Happy Birthday!!!
I connected emotionally with your statement about not wanting to be wet. Thank you for making this!
I don't have a diagnosis (yet, I'm working on it) and this video described me absolutely perfectly! It's weird, because I always assume, my experience is universal, but it apparently is not :D
Me watching this to understand my younger sibling better but relating to a lot of the signs and questioning if I am autistic too...
Okay so I'm not all the way through with the video but you mentioned Chris Watts
...that's really all I got lol. I felt my excitement rise immediately and wanted to just start explaining everything about him to someone but there's no one around that I haven't explained that story to.🤣
This was a very good and informative video! "I don't know how to be human so I would like instructions" - Me when I watch society, culture and psycology documentaries for hours daily to se how humans human around the world. And have been, historicaly.. :D
Love this video!!
Happy birthday 🎂🎉🎁🎊🎈
wow...I swear the not knowing when to stop talking thing is so me...I'll start telling my family something I literally watched and I'll give them the entire backstory to the point they tell me to just go back to my room and give them some peace.