I, and I'm sure many others, can TOTALLY relate to the difficult decision of whether or not to have children. I struggled FOR YEARS trying to make this decision, and it was only when I truly listened to myself and blocked out everyone else's expectations that I was able to see what I actually wanted. And now that I have made a decision for myself, I feel so relieved. So whatever you decide, I think taking the time to get in touch with yourself and what YOU really want is an excellent step! You'll figure it out in time ❤
Right there with you on the decision around having children, and understand completely how much mental space it takes up. Not a day has gone by for years where I haven't thought about it. It's reassuring to see people mentioning their own struggles in making this decision, thank you.
Thank you for touching on the subject of children and whether this is something you want to do, I really resonate with your current standpoint and I don't see enough of that, as someone who is also uncertain, I have always heard people who are dead set in their decisions which (at times) can bring a sense of negativity towards uncertainty. Wishing you all the best as you further explore this topic
Thank you for this video! I really appreciated the honest children chat you had. It’s such a complex conversation, now more than ever and it really makes me feel less alone in my own decision making, hearing there are people thinking over the same things
Venetia you are so wonderful for talking so openly about this topic. I’m in the same situation as you and knowing that I’m not the only one brings me so much comfort. Big love as always xx
I hope you find your answers. Know that you are not alone. ❤ This struggle to figure out this whole becoming a parent or not resonates hard. I, too, am confused. I struggle to figure out what it is that I truly want, what it is I have been conditioned to want, etc. etc.
As someone who has a child, I struggle with the thought of having another on a daily basis. Torn between giving my child a sibling or taking the easy route which would be to not have a second. No amount of research can prepare you. BUT one thing is for sure and it’s that no matter the tough times, having my daughter has made me far less absorbed and has shown me that there is way more to life than whatever I was doing before I had her. There’s no right or wrong. I hope you find what feels right for you.
I also struggled to make a decision. Listen to your heart! One thing that helped me was asking myself what I would regret more, having kids or not having them. Then, I had my answer.
Thank you for speaking out about this topic Venetia. I am in the same place as you are : I am going to therapy to figure out what I want, to dig within myself without the influence of what others project on me. I feel less alone. I wish the decision of whether or not to have kids was as clear to me as it seems to be for the majority of people.
I am reading the 100 years' world on palestine now and I love how much I am learning! Thanks for all the booktips and life snippets but more so... thanks for being so open and vulnerable (and very encouring I find it too). I really appreciate you ventia and I am sure you will figure this out for yourself
thank you for being here ♥ so great to hear that you're learning a lot from the book, too. i think Ilan Pappé is next on my list, i've been watching interviews with him over this past week and he's brilliant. sharing one here in case you're interested: th-cam.com/video/94lSEZ7Vjgg/w-d-xo.html
sooooo happy to see someone talking about IWTV!!! Literally the best show i’ve ever seen, incredible incredible incredible. so happy you enjoyed it Venetia X
"Hello pals" ~comes back looking like an absolute goddess. May we all learn to give people answers based on what we feel, which is somehow the hardest thing in the world
I just want to start by saying I looove your videos! My favourite on YT and I dont Watch a lot these days. your new place looks amazing, both inside and outside, this forest is enchanting. I also struggled with the decision about kids, and it is the hard one - until it is an easy one. It is in your heart ❤❤❤ I hope you will find it right there ❤
Interview with the Vampire is phenomenal and so underrated. They have been renewed for a third season, but based on Lestat’s rockstar era in the books. Rockstar Lestat, based in the 80s I believe!
A lot of people have children with little to no thought (my parents lol), and it isn't always the right decision to have children. The fact that you are thinking so strongly about it shows just how responsible you are and it shouldn't be a decision made lightly. Even if it doesn't feel like it right now, I'm sure giving yourself the time, space and grace to think about this is the best thing in the long run. Sending you love.
Sending hugs! Thanks for your honesty, but know that you don't owe us anything. Good luck with the journey, trust the process ❤ (easier said than done I know). And extra kudos to the cute cows! I've put all your book recommendations in my 'to read' list, they sound so good! Oh, and I always love your skincare videos, so I'm curious to know if you have any new finds and maybe tips for the autumn days ahead? I'm starting to prep a little and would love to get some inspiration. Enjoy september! X
You are so brave for sharing your experiences on this huge topic. Hope you find your answer - whatever it is there will be many many beautiful times ahead!
Oh Venetia, whether you want children or not, that answer is in your heart. It’s not about research or others opinions, it’s sits deep inside you, that want to be a mother. For me, it has always been unapologetically there but for others I know it can be scary. You don’t owe anyone an explanation, so throw that bag of responses away. If you truly ask yourself the question, you will know the answer. I have a little boy and he’s the light of my life, but at the same time, I see why people choose not to have children 😅
Thank you for all the great recommendations book/tv/filmwise. Everytime I watch one of your vlogs I'll spend at least the 30 minutes afterwards researching books, watching trailers and listening to new podcasts. I'll definitely read the book by Claire Dederer and give Interview with the vampire a go! Thank you!
@@VenetiaLaManna_ just thought I’d jump on here and say TH-cam definitely! Love these videos ❤️ also it’s so lovely to see you visiting Bath! Toppings is wonderful, have you been to Mr B’s Emporium? Also a gorgeous bookshop to visit if you haven’t been yet 📚
I havent heard your podcast but since im childfree because of multitude of reasons and I strongly believe I'll not be changing my decision in future...I can sound a bit biased and honestly I am glad to be CF as alongside the global and objective issues (that are common for most on why they're CF) its a highly subjective matter and personal decision as well... obviously. I know I just can't be a good mother when I need to get my life sorted and enjoy my hobbies to the fullest plus the important reasons like climate change/sustainability etc cements my decision even more. Life is indeed really short so I want to live it as much as I can to the fullest...The positives outweigh the negatives of not having kids through and through acc to me and yes I have given it a lot of thought as well, although I must admit i was never really a "pronatalist" to begin with.
I just started my masters in Cultural Teori, Politics and Policy, and I cant wait to get more into that topic of art and climate and injustice in generel. Im reading Stuart Halls text on Cultural Studies and its so so good!
Wishing you all the best on your journey to figure these things out! Feel like I'm on a similar one. I should really get a therapist, but having to pick someone feels like such a monumental task 😅
thank you! i definitely felt a weight on my shoulders to find the tight person, and it's frustrating when it takes a while... but you never know, it might come together faster than you think!
DANCE RECOMMENDATIONS COMING YOUR WAY! :D Pineapple (Covent Garden), The Manor (Finsbury Park), Base Dance Studios (Vauxhall) all have really good beginner classes.The Manor is my current fav, with gorgeous studios and facilities there, plus more of a commercial/hip hop vibe you are going for. I would say go for absolute beginner level at any of these if you can, just as sometimes 'beginner' can be not so beginner haha. Hope that helps you and enjoy! x
Can I join one of those dance classes?!?! Also on the topic of art addressing climate change, etc. I think there's space for all of versions of it. And I think there's something very powerful about showing without telling explicitly as it can build up awareness without triggering certain people.
Very beautiful girl, lovely blue and other make up and slick hair style 💕 So brave and honest to talk about someoting so personal like therapy 👍 Respect!
Dance recommendation: The Place!! Best price, really good quality and lovely teachers, so many styles to choose from and levels ✨ and so close to Kings Cross
You are definitely not alone with the biggest question of them all. I find it so hard to listen to what I want as well 🥺 This does apply to so many questions though, where we (but especially as a woman) are taught that specific things are just “normal” to do, have, want etc… I feel pathetic to envy others power of clear decision-making…either for or against those “normal things”. It’s so exhausting 😢 I hope you will find the answer to the big question and please do take us along on this journey 😊 Wishing you all the best!
Wow this will sound absolutely weird but right before you posting this I thought.. randomly really - i am curious what Venetia's feeling/thought is on having children. I guess I had some feeling that you may feel torn about it and I do too - maybe not for the same (societal) reasons - but still. And then i thought who am I to ask such a personal question. And then I see this post😮 so crazy. It was literally yday i thought about this. Anyway... I've felt very lonely being so doubtful about the biggest decision in my life (feels like that at least) and in my fears I've even felt somewhat resentful towards friends of mine that were (seemingly) sure of what they want... And even made me doubt about if i could be a good mother since i am not someone who has been intuitively/instinctively craving to be a mom... But i think good advice is being given above - only you and only i can know deep down what makes us inspired and what tingles us with some kind of.. enthusiasm and curiousity. I think the answer lies there. And I am feeling more and more inspired towards taking care of someone whom I'll learn so much from.. and then life will tell if i will even be able to. I think life is super complex and so to try to take into account every circumstance will make a decision that is already big , maybe even paralysing. I think we cannot know it all and as with everything we will learn step by step, through experience. Limiting ourselves upfront feels a bit sad. All of this is super personal of course. There's no right or wrong as some said above.
Loved this. About artists and current events. A film like Twisters is probably very big budget which means the studio needs a huge audience ie China and also conservatives in the US. This really cripples what film makers can do in 'big' films. I am a novelist and i get versions of this. My work can never sell in China and Russia for various reasons. This makes me personally a bit sad because readers and movie watchers aren’t necessarily in agreement with their governments. Anyway these are my not fully formed thoughts.
appreciate these insights! after reading a few interviews with the director Isaac Chung it seems his vibe is sort of to "show don't tell" and "don't over explain". this interview on atmos is worth a read: atmos.earth/in-twisters-daisy-edgar-jones-is-a-force-of-nature/
@@VenetiaLaManna_ ooh thank you. That's really interesting. Big believer in show don't tell. Hahaha goes to show I shouldn't comment without seeing the film and reading more about intentions.
My opinion in having children in this world is quite easy: good people should make good children :) they should be not afraid of it. Too many good people don't want kids because of this mad world and the future, but for me this is the wrong way. We should train the kids how to make the world a better place, to save their future. This helped me to be not scared in having kids. I am now 35 and give birth last month to my boy.
I, and I'm sure many others, can TOTALLY relate to the difficult decision of whether or not to have children. I struggled FOR YEARS trying to make this decision, and it was only when I truly listened to myself and blocked out everyone else's expectations that I was able to see what I actually wanted. And now that I have made a decision for myself, I feel so relieved. So whatever you decide, I think taking the time to get in touch with yourself and what YOU really want is an excellent step! You'll figure it out in time ❤
Right there with you on the decision around having children, and understand completely how much mental space it takes up. Not a day has gone by for years where I haven't thought about it. It's reassuring to see people mentioning their own struggles in making this decision, thank you.
Love seeing you post videos Venetia! You’ll figure out the answers to your big question in your own time. The universe is always guiding you 🫶
appreciate this and you ♥️
Thank you for touching on the subject of children and whether this is something you want to do, I really resonate with your current standpoint and I don't see enough of that, as someone who is also uncertain, I have always heard people who are dead set in their decisions which (at times) can bring a sense of negativity towards uncertainty. Wishing you all the best as you further explore this topic
Thank you for this video! I really appreciated the honest children chat you had. It’s such a complex conversation, now more than ever and it really makes me feel less alone in my own decision making, hearing there are people thinking over the same things
Venetia you are so wonderful for talking so openly about this topic. I’m in the same situation as you and knowing that I’m not the only one brings me so much comfort. Big love as always xx
I hope you find your answers. Know that you are not alone. ❤ This struggle to figure out this whole becoming a parent or not resonates hard. I, too, am confused. I struggle to figure out what it is that I truly want, what it is I have been conditioned to want, etc. etc.
right there with you ♥
The blue eyes look incredible!! I have my hen do this weekend and watching you get ready for your friend's has got me excited!
Always love your book, tv show and podcast recommendations 🥰
really pleased to hear that, thank you ♥
You are such a special human being, Venetia. Thank you for your openness, honesty and vulnerability. ♥🌸🌈✨
As someone who has a child, I struggle with the thought of having another on a daily basis. Torn between giving my child a sibling or taking the easy route which would be to not have a second.
No amount of research can prepare you. BUT one thing is for sure and it’s that no matter the tough times, having my daughter has made me far less absorbed and has shown me that there is way more to life than whatever I was doing before I had her. There’s no right or wrong. I hope you find what feels right for you.
@@TheConstancewillis I am currently having the same struggle and it's something I'm debating with every day! They are huge decisions
You are so brave speaking about what you are going through, I can relate and appreciate a lot that you are sharing your journey ❤️
You’re such a gem Venetia 💎 Thank you for sharing this vlog 🥰
I also struggled to make a decision. Listen to your heart! One thing that helped me was asking myself what I would regret more, having kids or not having them. Then, I had my answer.
Thank you for speaking out about this topic Venetia. I am in the same place as you are : I am going to therapy to figure out what I want, to dig within myself without the influence of what others project on me. I feel less alone. I wish the decision of whether or not to have kids was as clear to me as it seems to be for the majority of people.
I am reading the 100 years' world on palestine now and I love how much I am learning! Thanks for all the booktips and life snippets but more so... thanks for being so open and vulnerable (and very encouring I find it too). I really appreciate you ventia and I am sure you will figure this out for yourself
thank you for being here ♥ so great to hear that you're learning a lot from the book, too. i think Ilan Pappé is next on my list, i've been watching interviews with him over this past week and he's brilliant. sharing one here in case you're interested: th-cam.com/video/94lSEZ7Vjgg/w-d-xo.html
@@VenetiaLaManna_ uh yes, thank you! Much appreciated !
sooooo happy to see someone talking about IWTV!!! Literally the best show i’ve ever seen, incredible incredible incredible. so happy you enjoyed it Venetia X
"Hello pals" ~comes back looking like an absolute goddess. May we all learn to give people answers based on what we feel, which is somehow the hardest thing in the world
I just want to start by saying I looove your videos! My favourite on YT and I dont Watch a lot these days. your new place looks amazing, both inside and outside, this forest is enchanting. I also struggled with the decision about kids, and it is the hard one - until it is an easy one. It is in your heart ❤❤❤ I hope you will find it right there ❤
Interview with the Vampire is phenomenal and so underrated. They have been renewed for a third season, but based on Lestat’s rockstar era in the books. Rockstar Lestat, based in the 80s I believe!
PHE-NOM-INAL 🔥this sounds absolutely epic, so excited!
A lot of people have children with little to no thought (my parents lol), and it isn't always the right decision to have children. The fact that you are thinking so strongly about it shows just how responsible you are and it shouldn't be a decision made lightly. Even if it doesn't feel like it right now, I'm sure giving yourself the time, space and grace to think about this is the best thing in the long run. Sending you love.
So interesting to hear you talking about how you process this decision. Thanks for sharing ❤
Sending hugs! Thanks for your honesty, but know that you don't owe us anything. Good luck with the journey, trust the process ❤ (easier said than done I know).
And extra kudos to the cute cows!
I've put all your book recommendations in my 'to read' list, they sound so good!
Oh, and I always love your skincare videos, so I'm curious to know if you have any new finds and maybe tips for the autumn days ahead? I'm starting to prep a little and would love to get some inspiration. Enjoy september! X
You are so brave for sharing your experiences on this huge topic. Hope you find your answer - whatever it is there will be many many beautiful times ahead!
it is so hard honestly! when people ask me - i just say am on the 'i don t know' phase
Oh Venetia, whether you want children or not, that answer is in your heart. It’s not about research or others opinions, it’s sits deep inside you, that want to be a mother. For me, it has always been unapologetically there but for others I know it can be scary. You don’t owe anyone an explanation, so throw that bag of responses away. If you truly ask yourself the question, you will know the answer. I have a little boy and he’s the light of my life, but at the same time, I see why people choose not to have children 😅
Thank you for all the great recommendations book/tv/filmwise. Everytime I watch one of your vlogs I'll spend at least the 30 minutes afterwards researching books, watching trailers and listening to new podcasts. I'll definitely read the book by Claire Dederer and give Interview with the vampire a go! Thank you!
I'm almost finished Jordan Stephens book, sooo good! just started Braiding Sweatgrass :) big loveee
Thank you ❤
Another very thoughtful video. Max’s Dad seems lovely 😊 will you bring back the voice note podcasts? Really enjoyed them last year!
he is wonderful! i'd love to, but i just don't have capacity to do both TH-cam and podcasts... which would you prefer?
@@VenetiaLaManna_ totally fair, then 100% TH-cam! 😍 love seeing your outfits and the many books
@@VenetiaLaManna_ just thought I’d jump on here and say TH-cam definitely! Love these videos ❤️ also it’s so lovely to see you visiting Bath! Toppings is wonderful, have you been to Mr B’s Emporium? Also a gorgeous bookshop to visit if you haven’t been yet 📚
I havent heard your podcast but since im childfree because of multitude of reasons and I strongly believe I'll not be changing my decision in future...I can sound a bit biased and honestly I am glad to be CF as alongside the global and objective issues (that are common for most on why they're CF) its a highly subjective matter and personal decision as well... obviously. I know I just can't be a good mother when I need to get my life sorted and enjoy my hobbies to the fullest plus the important reasons like climate change/sustainability etc cements my decision even more. Life is indeed really short so I want to live it as much as I can to the fullest...The positives outweigh the negatives of not having kids through and through acc to me and yes I have given it a lot of thought as well, although I must admit i was never really a "pronatalist" to begin with.
I just started my masters in Cultural Teori, Politics and Policy, and I cant wait to get more into that topic of art and climate and injustice in generel. Im reading Stuart Halls text on Cultural Studies and its so so good!
Just here to say that I met you twice in London in 2019 and you definitely didnt disappoint! you were even better in real life :)
Wishing you all the best on your journey to figure these things out! Feel like I'm on a similar one. I should really get a therapist, but having to pick someone feels like such a monumental task 😅
thank you! i definitely felt a weight on my shoulders to find the tight person, and it's frustrating when it takes a while... but you never know, it might come together faster than you think!
Thank you Venetia for this great video!
max dad so cute!
Your look at the end, oh my world! You are stunning :)
DANCE RECOMMENDATIONS COMING YOUR WAY! :D Pineapple (Covent Garden), The Manor (Finsbury Park), Base Dance Studios (Vauxhall) all have really good beginner classes.The Manor is my current fav, with gorgeous studios and facilities there, plus more of a commercial/hip hop vibe you are going for. I would say go for absolute beginner level at any of these if you can, just as sometimes 'beginner' can be not so beginner haha. Hope that helps you and enjoy! x
Can I join one of those dance classes?!?!
Also on the topic of art addressing climate change, etc. I think there's space for all of versions of it. And I think there's something very powerful about showing without telling explicitly as it can build up awareness without triggering certain people.
let's go to one together! 🫶🏼
yeah we need everything all at once, claro?
Very beautiful girl, lovely blue and other make up and slick hair style 💕 So brave and honest to talk about someoting so personal like therapy 👍 Respect!
Dance recommendation: The Place!! Best price, really good quality and lovely teachers, so many styles to choose from and levels ✨ and so close to Kings Cross
You are definitely not alone with the biggest question of them all. I find it so hard to listen to what I want as well 🥺 This does apply to so many questions though, where we (but especially as a woman) are taught that specific things are just “normal” to do, have, want etc… I feel pathetic to envy others power of clear decision-making…either for or against those “normal things”. It’s so exhausting 😢 I hope you will find the answer to the big question and please do take us along on this journey 😊 Wishing you all the best!
thank you, i appreciate this. wishing you all the best too ♥
@@VenetiaLaManna_ Thank you 💜
.. your skin is beautiful, so lovely
Just wanted to say, I've been there on the child question. Sending love.
Wow this will sound absolutely weird but right before you posting this I thought.. randomly really - i am curious what Venetia's feeling/thought is on having children. I guess I had some feeling that you may feel torn about it and I do too - maybe not for the same (societal) reasons - but still. And then i thought who am I to ask such a personal question. And then I see this post😮 so crazy. It was literally yday i thought about this. Anyway... I've felt very lonely being so doubtful about the biggest decision in my life (feels like that at least) and in my fears I've even felt somewhat resentful towards friends of mine that were (seemingly) sure of what they want... And even made me doubt about if i could be a good mother since i am not someone who has been intuitively/instinctively craving to be a mom...
But i think good advice is being given above - only you and only i can know deep down what makes us inspired and what tingles us with some kind of.. enthusiasm and curiousity. I think the answer lies there. And I am feeling more and more inspired towards taking care of someone whom I'll learn so much from.. and then life will tell if i will even be able to.
I think life is super complex and so to try to take into account every circumstance will make a decision that is already big , maybe even paralysing. I think we cannot know it all and as with everything we will learn step by step, through experience. Limiting ourselves upfront feels a bit sad. All of this is super personal of course. There's no right or wrong as some said above.
Just love your videos Venetia 🥰 it looks soo lovely where you live - do you mind sharing which county you live in?
Loved this. About artists and current events. A film like Twisters is probably very big budget which means the studio needs a huge audience ie China and also conservatives in the US. This really cripples what film makers can do in 'big' films. I am a novelist and i get versions of this. My work can never sell in China and Russia for various reasons. This makes me personally a bit sad because readers and movie watchers aren’t necessarily in agreement with their governments. Anyway these are my not fully formed thoughts.
appreciate these insights! after reading a few interviews with the director Isaac Chung it seems his vibe is sort of to "show don't tell" and "don't over explain". this interview on atmos is worth a read: atmos.earth/in-twisters-daisy-edgar-jones-is-a-force-of-nature/
@@VenetiaLaManna_ ooh thank you. That's really interesting. Big believer in show don't tell. Hahaha goes to show I shouldn't comment without seeing the film and reading more about intentions.
Off The Rails is brilliant(in Clapham Junction)
oooh it looks great! thank you 🪩
omg Venetia you are so beautiful, absolutely ethereal!
❤❤❤
❤
My opinion in having children in this world is quite easy: good people should make good children :)
they should be not afraid of it.
Too many good people don't want kids because of this mad world and the future, but for me this is the wrong way. We should train the kids how to make the world a better place, to save their future. This helped me to be not scared in having kids. I am now 35 and give birth last month to my boy.
Why do you wear cross earrings? Do they align with your religious views? ❤
A bunch of goths wear them myself included
Bring them home now
I always want to buy ALL the books you recommend. They never disappoint!