Yog lawm viv ncaus nrog cov laus nyob ces zoo xwb ntag qhov zoo tshaj nyias nyob nyias tsev ces yuav zoo es lub neej yav tom ntej no thiaj yuav tsis muaj teeb meem rau yus tus kheej ok es yus lub thiaj yuav tsis muaj kev nyuaj siab ok
Niam mos ab, koj ua koj lub txaj rau koj pw. Koj txaus koj siab, yus xav xav tuaj ces txhob yws 2. Ua siab zoo nawb, ib hnub tom ntej nws tuag lawm koj thiaj tau lub neej zoo. Ua phem ces kawg npam laiv🤣
Q1: a household cannot hold two queens. You need to an open talk with your MIL and your husband. Need to set ground rules. Best of luck! All the secrets are so funny 😂
Hais rau tus txiv tsev uas pom nws tus niam tsev yug menyuam: Ua cas tseem xu siab thiab ntshai yus tus poj niam? Koj yog ib tug neeg tsis txawj xav li os. Twb pom tseeb npaum li mas yuav hlub koj tus me niam tsev tshaj plaws vim poj niam qhov chaw ua neej me npaum li es haum nej yam khoom xwb na. Cas tus me nyuam loj tag npaum li yuav tawm tau los. Nej puas xav tias yog me nyuam tawm ntawm nej qhov los nej qhov ntawv puas yuav siv tau lawm nawj. Tos poj niam lub cev phem tag los vim yug nej cov me nyuam nyuab npaum li los mas.
Q1: Have a heart to heart conversation with your husband. He needs to understand your point of view and the stressors in your relationship with your mil. The home is yours and you should be the one decorating it. Regarding the food, maybe it's best to let her buy her own groceries and make her own food. My MIL and FIL likes to eat different from us so I always invite her to go grocery shopping with me and ask her to get things they like. Whenever I cook, I always invite them to eat but they know they are always free to cook whatever they like as well. Stay strong because she will not be there forever but you and your husband have a life long journey left to live. Good luck!
Q2: niam nkauj mos ab kav tsij zoo siab tias tsis tau mus tuav ko hlo, yog tsis tuav ko hlau ces kawg ua niam ntiav nram vien xwb. Uv tus laus ko tseem zoo tshaj nyob tim nplog. Uv 2 3 xyoos xwb tsis tuag zoo tshaj txom nyem pluag tuag tas koj tiam tim nplog.
To the story about the nyab who doesn’t understand what “taw rooj” means; you are very mean and rude to your mother-in-law. Should have asked for clarification before yelling at her. If I were her, I would have smacked you. Truth is, she wasn’t laughing with you, she was laughing AT you!
Q2, yog koj hlub thaub laus li koj hais tias koj yeej yuav tsis nroo txog hauv no li os, koj mas ntshe xav txog lig kawg li os. Thaub laus hmoob mes kas yeej coj li ntawd koj txaus koj siab.
#1 Hom niam pog kus kus kes coj li ko ces txawm nrog tub nyab ntxhais vauv leej twg nyob los yeej tsis haum li. Sawv daws tsis nrog nej nyob ces ib txia yuav tias phem xwb, kuv Mas yeej understand kawg
Ua Siab loj rau tus niam pog nawb. Neeg laus lawm ces yeej nkaug me ntsis os nawb. Ua li Tej laus hais, uv tsis tuag. Yus ua zoo hais rau yus tus txiv kom tau taub. Koj yus tus txiv ua zoo hais rau Tej laus xwb ces yuav ok lawm os nawb. Peb me nyuam hmoob meska tam sim no yeej hloov lawm ntau thiab Siab yeej ceev zog. Tab sis ua Siab ntev xwb ces yeej yuav zoo xwb os. Ib txia peb cov nyab hmoob tiam 21 no yeej rub tau lub Siab ntev thiab hlub Tej laus kawg lawm.
q1: you need to sit down with your husband and mil. tell them what you like and dont like and what is your expectations are..if your mil doesnt like it she can move out..but sooner you communicate this to them better off you will be.
I agree. My sister in laws use to tell me how my mother was to them and I see that my mother complains a lot about my sister in laws too and they started moving out. One day my mother came to me to express that she was heartbroken that my married brothers were all moving out. As a daughter I had to put my mom in her place and tell her straight up why none of them want to stay. My mother used to make this comment that she wants her sons to run they family so that she could be the child but yet she never gave them the opportunity so I had to throw that in her face to make her think.
Be a mother in law is not ez. I use to be a daughter in law. I thought it was hard but nope. Anyways. I let them be. I live in my room, I let them be live them life. I do my owe thing. Eat where when I want too. Now it's their life. I'm glad I have the best nyabs.
Q1- Your mil is a true og. What belongs to her son belongs to her lol Knowing how your mother in law is, if you are ready for war. Just tell her what you don't like. Don't be afraid and move out. It's your house. Good luck. Q2- Yog koj yeej hlub thiab nyiam koj tus txiv ces cia li ua nws hais xwb ma. Nws nyiam noj dabtsi ces koj noj dabtsi. Cov laus yeej noj txawv cov hluas. Tseem muaj mob li koj tus txiv thiab ces kawg noj tsuag xwb. Pab tsis tau koj os tus viv ncaus.
Pog mos ab awd, koj ces tau saj qab mib kawg kiag kawm os. Koj twb paub tias koj niag txiv twb cuj caws lawm xwb ces nws ham tsis ua loj ua lug lem lem li ko mas es leej tias thaub laus yuav ua li cov hluas no nas.
Q1: your MIL's behavior is over baring. You need to discuss the issue with your husband for him address this with his mom. Your MIL has to understand that this is your house and she just lives there. Hopefully your husband understands where you are coming from and support you.
Q3, tos tuaj txog lawm xa tsis tau rov qab lawm. Kom Tus txiv txhob phem phem, tsam koj nyob tsis taus nrog nws. Tsis yog xav koj rov, hos yog yuav tau yus koj , thaum koj twb nrauj nws tag lawm los nws tseem ho yuav mag yug koj thiab. Tos tuaj lawm ces yeej tsis muaj cai xa rov qab lawm . Cas tseem muaj plhu hais tias yuav muab xa rov qab thiab nas
Q1, koj yuav tau qhia rau koj tus txiv, nyob rooj teb no tsis zoo li nyob tim nplog teb, kom koj tus txiv niam yuav tau pauv nws tus zeeb ceem, yog tsis pauv xeeb ceem ces kom nws yuav tau mus nyob nws
Q1: You’ve worked hard to build your life and deserved your sanity when you are in the comfort of your own home. Your mother in law is just a tenant that is benefiting from you, therefore, don’t give her too much power over your life. If she causes chaos and creates toxicity in your space, don’t be rude or hurtful to her, but be blunt and honest with her about what you want and communicate your expectations. Also convey how her behaviors has been making you feel. Based on your description of her, it is likely that she won’t receive the message well or in a positive manner. The most important thing is that it gives your husband and his mom an opportunity to correct her behaviors. If your husband played ignorant and your mother in law becomes even more aggressive, then you should give them an ultimatum. You should put your sanity and happiness above all including your MIL, husband, and kids. Remember, if you’re happy and sane, everyone will be happy. Unhappy wife = unhappy marriage = toxic living conditions for the kids = divorce Q2: You married your older husband so you could come to this country for a better life. There is nothing wrong with that. Your older husband married you so he could feel young and powerful again (at least this is what most Hmong OGs have been saying for marrying a younger woman). With both of you already aware of your position (you as a “niam mos ab” and him as a “thaub laus”), your future together is already uncertain. With you being here and being married to him does not give him the right to mistreat or control you to the point of restricting what you could or could not eat. Eventhough you are a “niam mos ab,” you are first a human being just like all those people that are hating on you and have your basic human rights. Just know that the minute you got your Green Card, he can no longer send you back to Laos. As a matter of fact, once you are legally married to him after the 90 Days requirement, you can stay in the country. If he threatens you or forces you to go back to Laos, get an immigration attorney to fight your case. Be smart and don’t let your husband and his kids take you on a trip, especially flying. They might fly you straight to Laos. Once you are in Laos, it would be more expensive and much harder to fight your case. If you do decide to fight your case and for yourself legally, be smart about it and don’t threat your husband with it or disclose what you are planning to do. Depending on how your husband reacts to it, you could put yourself in a dangerous situation. If you must leave and have no one, go to a women shelter. Good luck to you sister and stand up for yourself.
Question #1, MIL and nyab will most likely not get along. I would say about 10% niam pog and nyab get along well under one roof, those are the ones that nyab is under niam pog or niam pog loving the nyab and help out and be flexible. Now you know why your niam pog cannot stay with your SILs. You were wrong to assume it's the SIL😂. Two women doesn't like and do the same thing especially when it comes to cooking and cleaning.
Teb tus me tus me niam mos as naw me niam hluas haw yuav thaub laus ce yeej kawg li ko os mog ua siab ntev siab loj xwb Luag tia laus thiab hluas tsi sib nkag siab ce li ko ntag los mas
Q1: I freaking understand! My house, my rule. The way how I see it, if I move in to live with someone, I live by their rule. How they decorate their house and how they live is none of my business, however, whoever that move in with me, they better live by my rule. How I decorate my house, DO NOT TOUCH and DO NOT REARRANGE. DO NOT BUY ADDITIONAL FURNITURES (unless it goes into your room) because they will all go outside and we will all be fighting.
Q2: tus mi sister aw tus neeg siab phem limhiam e tsim txom koj lub siab ces txawm yog tus laus tus hluas los yog koj ntsib tau tus phem lawm ces tag nrho ibsim neej no nyob nrog txoj kev lwjsiab xwb os tsis muaj leejtwg yuav kho tau tus neeg siab phem ntawd kom tig los ua neeg siab zoo ibzaug li yuav yog av lim e thiaj li hloov tau ua tus neeg tshiab xwb.. yog koj tseem hlub koj tus thaub laus ntawd ces kawg koj uv nws thiab ua raws li nws siab nyiam xwb os mog. thiab kom tej kwvtij pab hais kom nws yoog koj thiab yog nws tsis kam ces koj yuav tsis yuav nws lawm no seb nws puas hloov xwb tiag
Yog niam pog tsis nyiam koj tus ua nyab ces txhob cia niam pog los nrog koj nyob tsam nws twv nws tus tub ua phem rau koj kom lub neej puas. Yog tias koj tseem xav muaj lub neej nrog koj tus txiv ces txhob cia tej tug neeg uas tsis nyiam koj los nrog koj nyob los tsim teeb meeb rau koj lub neej
Q2: OG married to Niam mos Ab... Mindset 80% difference! 40 yrs gap!! NO NO! Never understand each other and will never get along. Anxiety anxiety 😢🙆. Nothing you can do...way til OG bye you 💀😱
Having a baby hurts. I freaking hate it when men tells says things like shhhh you're too loud during child birth. Men can't even get sick without acting like a freaking child.
Niam mos Ab yog muaj tseeb li koj hais no ces ua twb zoo hais koj tus txiv tias thsum koj hluas koj twb nyiam noj dawv noj qab nim no koj noj tsis taus qab lawm tab sis kuv tseem nyiam noj qab yog li kuv mam ua 2 hom rau wb noj mas na nawb hos koj ua koj hom xwb ces nws yeej cem koj xwb
Q1: this is our life of generations everyone have to understand and face reality not in the past! Stand your ground try to talk in a manner to her if she disagrees then the best way is walk out don’t stay in with a horrible mother in law!! We as nyab will always be a bad nyab so who cares if you care too much you will have stroke!!
?1. Let your mil do whatever. Your job ua tau hu nws noj nws tsis noj los koj thiaj tau cai.its ok if she doesn't eat your food and you don't eat her food.redcflag when she don't get along with her other daughter inlaws.koj educated los tsis paub koj you are a nyob hmoob you gotta act n do like one .good luck you got a niam pog nkaus y
Koj nrog niam pog tham tias koj.lub tsev koj xav kom ua li cas yog nws yws ces koj nrog nws tham zoo duas li koj chim nawb thiab nrog koj tus txiv tham tias koj pom li cas kom koj thiaj li kaj siab yog koj xav nrog IB tug neeg tham ntawm 2 tog ces hu kuv mam pab koj nawb
Wow you are so smart If the girl is 19yrs old and the guy is 41yrs old that mean he is 22yrs older not 41yrs older than her. Tsuas paub lo lus tub yees xwb Lo lub tub yeeg no yog ib lo lus hmoob tshiab nyuam qhuav tsim tshiab lov Kuv tsis yog txiv mos ab Tiam sis kuv yog txiv mos liab Koj ces qhuav ntxim xwb ruam li ko
Q1. This kind of mother-in-law, tell straight to her face what you want to happen. If she can't live with your rules, she can move in with another son. You let them, they will step on you until you say no.
Q1: it's your house....u have the right to be happy in your own home. U need to tell your husband that u are not Happy. U have the to tell your mom in law your rules. It best they go rent a place live close to u both. Don't be afraid to tell your husband how u feel. Why u need to hostage in your own home? Good luck.
Thaum kuv yuav kuv lub tsev nrog kuv tus txiv, niam pog Xav los nrog wb nyob, wb tsis kam, txij lis ntawv los, cov muam mas ntxub ntxub ntxub kuv tag sim neej. Wb lub tsev, SAB hauv qab tseem yuav tau kho vim tsis muaj kitchen thiab hoob nab, ces PEB 4 niam tub nyob 1 floor xwb.
Q2. He shouldn't control how you eat or how you wear. Tell him he need to stop. He can be on his diet meals for his health without you. My uncle married my aunt from Laos, they both don't eat the same foods. They cook two different meals.
Q1: what you can do is talk to your husband and all the other brothers and sister in law and have your mother in law live on her own. This will be the best way to solve everything.
1st question best advice is to have a sit down with your husband and mother in law. Your home, your the woman of the house, your the wife. Explain to both of them that you can not tolerate your mother in law behavior and attitude much less her personality. The way she's behaving is why she doesn't get along with her other daughter in laws. It is not them but her. Tell your husband that if he doesn't talk to his mother and things continued your going to leave and divorce him.
Q1 Time to face your MIL face to face tell her she need to stop complaining and throwing your foods away. She either do your way or takes the highway. Either your MIL adapt to you get along or get out. Need not to say more .
Secret: Tus txiv hais qhov Labor mas g yog secret tiag2 nws muab zab ua nws li secret xwb os. Kuv tus no mus yug 4 tug baby yeej g muaj qhov tias Dr kom tus txiv mus xauj thaum poj niam yug baby na yog yus hlb yus poj niam ces mus nyob hauv hoob tuav nws tes los yog support yus tus hlb xwb. Thaum tau baby los Dr tsuas noog tus txiv tias seb puas xav txiav hlab nthaw yog yus g txiav ces Dr txiav rau yus xwb tus txiv tsev no na koj muab hais tshaj dhau yam twb g muaj cuag li tej koj tau hais Dr yeej g tau lij poj niam tej chaw mos ib zaug thiab nej cov txiv neej hmoob xiam hlwb aw koj lam tau lam hais tej yam g muaj tseeb li no nawb...
Q1: some Niam pog are just too much....complain every little things! Tiam 21 why MIL still wanted their nyabs too cook or do chores for them?? Come on OG!! this is not Laos!!
Question 1 tell ur husband to regulate that before u do. I don't get why a lot of spouse won't tell their husband what bothers them. That's the person who suppose to keep the peace. If they don't want to take care of it then they can live with their mama alone
MIL are always victims… talk to your husband because you two need your space with each other without the stress of your MIL. It’s difficult as a newlywed already. Talk to him make him understand your view.
Q1, you need to apologize to your older sister in laws. It's a karma to said that you have high education and you will be able to handle you MIL, please do not complain about it. Uses your expertise to handle her like you said how experienced you are.what goes around comes around.
Q1: I been there I done that, yeah you should distance yourself from a person like your MIL it's annoying it's like a bomb 💣 waiting to ignite. I used to take care of my ex FIL for 2.5 years OMG it's like hell break loose, complaining every day. I cook for him, give him medication, weight him, and take his blood sugar test every day along with appointments and rehabs my brain is about to explode. Do what is right for you and distance yourself from people like her before things escalate worst.
Q1: I hate to be rude but it's comedic that you were so quick to assume that just because you're "educated" and "modern" you can better empathize with the elderly unlike the older "nyabs". Not sure how that even makes sense. Yet..you go on to say you want "personal" time in your home prior to having anyone move in with you. Again, that's funny because who here doesn't want their privacy - forever. It's not something you trial and then easily give up, so that was foolish to say. It's usually people with that mentality that most definitely can't live with or put up with their in-laws. I hope you know that "older nyabs" may not be nice per se, but they still understand and some follow traditional rules, those of which you don't practice; cooking "traditional" food for the elderly, waking up early, tending to the house and chores, letting the elderly "have their way" etc. But, enough with the lecturing and on to your question, you are pretty much out of options. You have 1 of 2 choices, go the "educated and modern" route, which is, your house your rules, typical nyab miskas style, or stick to traditional rules and put up with your elderly nagging MIL. If you go with choice number one, you're ultimately contradicting your character and what you originally tried to pose as - refer to beginning of comment. No one is perfect, therefore there is no such thing as a perfect DIL but I think that's what you thought you were going to be that's why you initially passed judgement on the other DILs. Regardless, good luck to you
Q1: this is what I do with my mil. I tell her I work full time, manage a clean house, and am a mother of 4 all under 13 (5 if she counts her son). She is welcome to eat anything and everything I buy and cook as long as I don't specifically state "mom, pls dont eat this because it's for work or that event." If I cook something u don't like feel free to make something u like and vice versa for me. As far as cleaning and home decor, when she comments all I say is "but I like it this way and I'm going to do it my way" and if she moves something, I put it back and reply as calmly as possible that I like it there. Example: I had a kitchen mat before the sink and she didn't like it. She tossed it out into my garage 3x, I thought it was my husband, keeper putting it back in place without comment. One day in her presence, I just said "nej txhob muab kuv daim ntaub pua taw no pov2 tseg ma, kuv nyiam nws nyob twj ywm no nab." Take deep breaths, breathe. I know and feel your frustrations. I continue to do what I do and feel that whoever lives with me doesn't like it, they can move out. Reporting to the clan isn't an option for me unless I hear her gossiping about me then we can proceed from there.
You sound like "its my way or the highway" because its "my house". If you cant learn to balance the needs of others but only yourself, all I have to say is good luck, you're gonna need it.
wow, do you really have the guts to tell your mother in law to not eat this because its for work or event? even i dont have the guts to tell my birth mom to not eat or touch certain foods even if its for work or an event. what i do is buy extra so the fam can eat some and i would still have enough for the event. props to you. tell me your ways lol
Yog hais tias tsi tau saib dua ces kawg poob plis xwb lau..kuv believe koj kawg li.
Yog lawm viv ncaus nrog cov laus nyob ces zoo xwb ntag qhov zoo tshaj nyias nyob nyias tsev ces yuav zoo es lub neej yav tom ntej no thiaj yuav tsis muaj teeb meem rau yus tus kheej ok es yus lub thiaj yuav tsis muaj kev nyuaj siab ok
Niam mos ab, koj ua koj lub txaj rau koj pw. Koj txaus koj siab, yus xav xav tuaj ces txhob yws 2. Ua siab zoo nawb, ib hnub tom ntej nws tuag lawm koj thiaj tau lub neej zoo. Ua phem ces kawg npam laiv🤣
000teebthoj
Uv tsis tuag. Uv yuav Koob Hmoob!
Mob hlwb kawg yog muaj tus niam pog coj li ko.
Q1: a household cannot hold two queens. You need to an open talk with your MIL and your husband. Need to set ground rules. Best of luck!
All the secrets are so funny 😂
Hahaha that last secret. LMAO. 😂😂😂
Q2: kj yeej rua muag tuaj yuav tus laus, kj yuav yoog nws ntau tshaj xwb. kj yog nws tus poj niam, kj yuav tau ntim qab zib rau nws yog nws tsis ntim thiab yog kj tsis xav take k nws tom hoob maum.
Cov niag niam pog txaus ntxub ku kes yeej txaus ntxub li ko nrog leej twg nyob los yeej g zoo li os
?2. Vim thaum lays khiv koj dhau txhua tus thaum lays yeej khoo vim lawv ntshaw tsam nej ntxeev siab
Cov niag ntsej muag laus khib ciaj khib tuag ces li ko mo
Q:2 yus txaus yus siab yuav thaub laus ces pab tsis tau lau!
Hais rau tus txiv tsev uas pom nws tus niam tsev yug menyuam: Ua cas tseem xu siab thiab ntshai yus tus poj niam? Koj yog ib tug neeg tsis txawj xav li os. Twb pom tseeb npaum li mas yuav hlub koj tus me niam tsev tshaj plaws vim poj niam qhov chaw ua neej me npaum li es haum nej yam khoom xwb na. Cas tus me nyuam loj tag npaum li yuav tawm tau los. Nej puas xav tias yog me nyuam tawm ntawm nej qhov los nej qhov ntawv puas yuav siv tau lawm nawj.
Tos poj niam lub cev phem tag los vim yug nej cov me nyuam nyuab npaum li los mas.
LOL! OMG the last story is hilarious! 😂🤣😂
Q1: Have a heart to heart conversation with your husband. He needs to understand your point of view and the stressors in your relationship with your mil. The home is yours and you should be the one decorating it. Regarding the food, maybe it's best to let her buy her own groceries and make her own food. My MIL and FIL likes to eat different from us so I always invite her to go grocery shopping with me and ask her to get things they like. Whenever I cook, I always invite them to eat but they know they are always free to cook whatever they like as well. Stay strong because she will not be there forever but you and your husband have a life long journey left to live. Good luck!
Q2: niam nkauj mos ab kav tsij zoo siab tias tsis tau mus tuav ko hlo, yog tsis tuav ko hlau ces kawg ua niam ntiav nram vien xwb. Uv tus laus ko tseem zoo tshaj nyob tim nplog. Uv 2 3 xyoos xwb tsis tuag zoo tshaj txom nyem pluag tuag tas koj tiam tim nplog.
To the story about the nyab who doesn’t understand what “taw rooj” means; you are very mean and rude to your mother-in-law. Should have asked for clarification before yelling at her. If I were her, I would have smacked you. Truth is, she wasn’t laughing with you, she was laughing AT you!
Q2, yog koj hlub thaub laus li koj hais tias koj yeej yuav tsis nroo txog hauv no li os, koj mas ntshe xav txog lig kawg li os. Thaub laus hmoob mes kas yeej coj li ntawd koj txaus koj siab.
Q1.open communication. Tell her your wish.
Q2. Txhob pub muaj minyuam. Koj tes haujlwm yog ua zoo nkauj rau nws xwb.
Taws nkaus tsiv rauv neeg laus tsiv yug vim li no thiaj tsis tshua muaj neeg nyiam cov laus
#1 Hom niam pog kus kus kes coj li ko ces txawm nrog tub nyab ntxhais vauv leej twg nyob los yeej tsis haum li. Sawv daws tsis nrog nej nyob ces ib txia yuav tias phem xwb, kuv Mas yeej understand kawg
Ua Siab loj rau tus niam pog nawb. Neeg laus lawm ces yeej nkaug me ntsis os nawb. Ua li Tej laus hais, uv tsis tuag. Yus ua zoo hais rau yus tus txiv kom tau taub. Koj yus tus txiv ua zoo hais rau Tej laus xwb ces yuav ok lawm os nawb. Peb me nyuam hmoob meska tam sim no yeej hloov lawm ntau thiab Siab yeej ceev zog. Tab sis ua Siab ntev xwb ces yeej yuav zoo xwb os. Ib txia peb cov nyab hmoob tiam 21 no yeej rub tau lub Siab ntev thiab hlub Tej laus kawg lawm.
Hello
q1: you need to sit down with your husband and mil. tell them what you like and dont like and what is your expectations are..if your mil doesnt like it she can move out..but sooner you communicate this to them better off you will be.
Question 1: lub neej Niam pog thiab Nyab ces yeej never haum li os. Two women can’t live in the same house. That’s the truth.
Q#1: Don’t be afraid to put your Mother in Law in her in position. Don’t be afraid to tell your Husband & MIL how you feel.
I agree. My sister in laws use to tell me how my mother was to them and I see that my mother complains a lot about my sister in laws too and they started moving out. One day my mother came to me to express that she was heartbroken that my married brothers were all moving out. As a daughter I had to put my mom in her place and tell her straight up why none of them want to stay. My mother used to make this comment that she wants her sons to run they family so that she could be the child but yet she never gave them the opportunity so I had to throw that in her face to make her think.
Q2. Tus niam tsev koj ces kawg mob hlwb tab sis koj yuav tau nrog koj tus txiv tus coj los yog cov kwv tij tham kom nws pauv nws tus xeeb ceem liam
Be a mother in law is not ez. I use to be a daughter in law. I thought it was hard but nope. Anyways. I let them be. I live in my room, I let them be live them life. I do my owe thing. Eat where when I want too. Now it's their life. I'm glad I have the best nyabs.
Q1- Your mil is a true og. What belongs to her son belongs to her lol Knowing how your mother in law is, if you are ready for war. Just tell her what you don't like. Don't be afraid and move out. It's your house. Good luck.
Q2- Yog koj yeej hlub thiab nyiam koj tus txiv ces cia li ua nws hais xwb ma. Nws nyiam noj dabtsi ces koj noj dabtsi. Cov laus yeej noj txawv cov hluas. Tseem muaj mob li koj tus txiv thiab ces kawg noj tsuag xwb. Pab tsis tau koj os tus viv ncaus.
Good morning sister
Pog mos ab awd, koj ces tau saj qab mib kawg kiag kawm os. Koj twb paub tias koj niag txiv twb cuj caws lawm xwb ces nws ham tsis ua loj ua lug lem lem li ko mas es leej tias thaub laus yuav ua li cov hluas no nas.
People have different opinions and thoughts. The husband must have a big heart. Ok.
Q1: your MIL's behavior is over baring. You need to discuss the issue with your husband for him address this with his mom. Your MIL has to understand that this is your house and she just lives there. Hopefully your husband understands where you are coming from and support you.
Sister ua qab7 6 thaublaus noj n yuav insurance 6 koj yuav 6 lotto xwb... 😆
Q1:..most mother in law maybe 99.999% are all like that lol damm OG lol
Q3, tos tuaj txog lawm xa tsis tau rov qab lawm. Kom Tus txiv txhob phem phem, tsam koj nyob tsis taus nrog nws. Tsis yog xav koj rov, hos yog yuav tau yus koj , thaum koj twb nrauj nws tag lawm los nws tseem ho yuav mag yug koj thiab. Tos tuaj lawm ces yeej tsis muaj cai xa rov qab lawm . Cas tseem muaj plhu hais tias yuav muab xa rov qab thiab nas
Q1, koj yuav tau qhia rau koj tus txiv, nyob rooj teb no tsis zoo li nyob tim nplog teb, kom koj tus txiv niam yuav tau pauv nws tus zeeb ceem, yog tsis pauv xeeb ceem ces kom nws yuav tau mus nyob nws
Q1: You’ve worked hard to build your life and deserved your sanity when you are in the comfort of your own home. Your mother in law is just a tenant that is benefiting from you, therefore, don’t give her too much power over your life. If she causes chaos and creates toxicity in your space, don’t be rude or hurtful to her, but be blunt and honest with her about what you want and communicate your expectations. Also convey how her behaviors has been making you feel. Based on your description of her, it is likely that she won’t receive the message well or in a positive manner. The most important thing is that it gives your husband and his mom an opportunity to correct her behaviors. If your husband played ignorant and your mother in law becomes even more aggressive, then you should give them an ultimatum. You should put your sanity and happiness above all including your MIL, husband, and kids. Remember, if you’re happy and sane, everyone will be happy. Unhappy wife = unhappy marriage = toxic living conditions for the kids = divorce
Q2: You married your older husband so you could come to this country for a better life. There is nothing wrong with that. Your older husband married you so he could feel young and powerful again (at least this is what most Hmong OGs have been saying for marrying a younger woman). With both of you already aware of your position (you as a “niam mos ab” and him as a “thaub laus”), your future together is already uncertain. With you being here and being married to him does not give him the right to mistreat or control you to the point of restricting what you could or could not eat. Eventhough you are a “niam mos ab,” you are first a human being just like all those people that are hating on you and have your basic human rights. Just know that the minute you got your Green Card, he can no longer send you back to Laos. As a matter of fact, once you are legally married to him after the 90 Days requirement, you can stay in the country. If he threatens you or forces you to go back to Laos, get an immigration attorney to fight your case. Be smart and don’t let your husband and his kids take you on a trip, especially flying. They might fly you straight to Laos. Once you are in Laos, it would be more expensive and much harder to fight your case. If you do decide to fight your case and for yourself legally, be smart about it and don’t threat your husband with it or disclose what you are planning to do. Depending on how your husband reacts to it, you could put yourself in a dangerous situation. If you must leave and have no one, go to a women shelter. Good luck to you sister and stand up for yourself.
Question #1, MIL and nyab will most likely not get along. I would say about 10% niam pog and nyab get along well under one roof, those are the ones that nyab is under niam pog or niam pog loving the nyab and help out and be flexible. Now you know why your niam pog cannot stay with your SILs. You were wrong to assume it's the SIL😂. Two women doesn't like and do the same thing especially when it comes to cooking and cleaning.
Teb tus me tus me niam mos as naw
me niam hluas haw yuav thaub laus ce yeej kawg li ko os mog ua siab ntev siab loj xwb
Luag tia laus thiab hluas tsi sib nkag siab ce li ko ntag los mas
Q1 thawj tug nyab yog niam pog ntxub lawm ces qhia koj tias niam pog yeej phem tsawg tus nyab los yeej tsis haum yuav tau uv xwb tsis ntev nws khiav rov mus nrog tus nyab hlob nyob lawm txhob k cia nws mam khia nws xwb ua li koj nyiam xwb seb nws xav nyob xwb
Muab veg kiag xwb mas ..
Q1: I freaking understand! My house, my rule. The way how I see it, if I move in to live with someone, I live by their rule. How they decorate their house and how they live is none of my business, however, whoever that move in with me, they better live by my rule. How I decorate my house, DO NOT TOUCH and DO NOT REARRANGE. DO NOT BUY ADDITIONAL FURNITURES (unless it goes into your room) because they will all go outside and we will all be fighting.
U need to tell his elder to talk to her. Say why u need to say.
The guy that fainted, you not the only one. My friend fainted to but I'm good lol watchingy wife gives birth.
Q2: tus mi sister aw tus neeg siab phem limhiam e tsim txom koj lub siab ces txawm yog tus laus tus hluas los yog koj ntsib tau tus phem lawm ces tag nrho ibsim neej no nyob nrog txoj kev lwjsiab xwb os tsis muaj leejtwg yuav kho tau tus neeg siab phem ntawd kom tig los ua neeg siab zoo ibzaug li
yuav yog av lim e thiaj li hloov tau ua tus neeg tshiab xwb.. yog koj tseem hlub koj tus thaub laus ntawd ces kawg koj uv nws thiab ua raws li nws siab nyiam xwb os mog. thiab kom tej kwvtij pab hais kom nws yoog koj thiab yog nws tsis kam ces koj yuav tsis yuav nws lawm no seb nws puas hloov xwb tiag
Yog niam pog tsis nyiam koj tus ua nyab ces txhob cia niam pog los nrog koj nyob tsam nws twv nws tus tub ua phem rau koj kom lub neej puas. Yog tias koj tseem xav muaj lub neej nrog koj tus txiv ces txhob cia tej tug neeg uas tsis nyiam koj los nrog koj nyob los tsim teeb meeb rau koj lub neej
Q2: OG married to Niam mos Ab... Mindset 80% difference! 40 yrs gap!! NO NO! Never understand each other and will never get along. Anxiety anxiety 😢🙆. Nothing you can do...way til OG bye you 💀😱
Having a baby hurts. I freaking hate it when men tells says things like shhhh you're too loud during child birth. Men can't even get sick without acting like a freaking child.
Niam mos Ab yog muaj tseeb li koj hais no ces ua twb zoo hais koj tus txiv tias thsum koj hluas koj twb nyiam noj dawv noj qab nim no koj noj tsis taus qab lawm tab sis kuv tseem nyiam noj qab yog li kuv mam ua 2 hom rau wb noj mas na nawb hos koj ua koj hom xwb ces nws yeej cem koj xwb
q2: poj hmoob nplog aw..koj twb paub thaub laus 41 xyoos hlob koj es nws lub hlwb txawv koj lub lawm deb es koj twb txaus siab yuav nws ces kav tsij uv twj ywm xwb mas. Thaum koj yuav nws twb tsis dig muag ne..koj rua muag ntsoov thiab pom tias nws laus thiab lub tswv yim txawv koj lub na. yog koj yeej hlub niag thaub laus li qhov koj hais ces kav tsij nyob twj ywm xwb mas..tsis ntev thaub laus tuag lawm koj mam mus nrhiav dua tshiab os.
Q1: this is our life of generations everyone have to understand and face reality not in the past! Stand your ground try to talk in a manner to her if she disagrees then the best way is walk out don’t stay in with a horrible mother in law!! We as nyab will always be a bad nyab so who cares if you care too much you will have stroke!!
?1. Let your mil do whatever. Your job ua tau hu nws noj nws tsis noj los koj thiaj tau cai.its ok if she doesn't eat your food and you don't eat her food.redcflag when she don't get along with her other daughter inlaws.koj educated los tsis paub koj you are a nyob hmoob you gotta act n do like one .good luck you got a niam pog nkaus y
The general rule of thumb is that if you live under my roof you must follow my rule.
I concur, or else move the heck out! Hehehe. Two queen cannot be under one roof!
Koj nrog niam pog tham tias koj.lub tsev koj xav kom ua li cas yog nws yws ces koj nrog nws tham zoo duas li koj chim nawb thiab nrog koj tus txiv tham tias koj pom li cas kom koj thiaj li kaj siab yog koj xav nrog IB tug neeg tham ntawm 2 tog ces hu kuv mam pab koj nawb
Wow you are so smart
If the girl is 19yrs old and the guy is 41yrs old that mean he is 22yrs older not 41yrs older than her.
Tsuas paub lo lus tub yees xwb
Lo lub tub yeeg no yog ib lo lus hmoob tshiab nyuam qhuav tsim tshiab lov
Kuv tsis yog txiv mos ab
Tiam sis kuv yog txiv mos liab
Koj ces qhuav ntxim xwb ruam li ko
Q1. This kind of mother-in-law, tell straight to her face what you want to happen. If she can't live with your rules, she can move in with another son. You let them, they will step on you until you say no.
Q1: it's your house....u have the right to be happy in your own home. U need to tell your husband that u are not Happy. U have the to tell your mom in law your rules. It best they go rent a place live close to u both. Don't be afraid to tell your husband how u feel. Why u need to hostage in your own home? Good luck.
Thaum kuv yuav kuv lub tsev nrog kuv tus txiv, niam pog Xav los nrog wb nyob, wb tsis kam, txij lis ntawv los, cov muam mas ntxub ntxub ntxub kuv tag sim neej. Wb lub tsev, SAB hauv qab tseem yuav tau kho vim tsis muaj kitchen thiab hoob nab, ces PEB 4 niam tub nyob 1 floor xwb.
@@sunnygirl973 cov muam ua tsis yog lawm os. Kavliam cia lawv ntxub lawv ntag. Yus nyob yus qhov zoo xwb. Txhob nyshai txhob nyuajsiab txog li vim koj tsis thaum rau lawv.
Story 1 about dude and giving birth. There’s a real condition on that!!! A diagnosis. You’re not alone
Q2. YOU KNOW WHAT YOU SIGN UP FOR .Q1 TALK TO YOUR MOTHER IN LAW AND YOUR HUSBAND ABOUT YOUR SITUATION AND MAKING SURE SHE UNDERSTANDS IT.
Q2. He shouldn't control how you eat or how you wear. Tell him he need to stop. He can be on his diet meals for his health without you. My uncle married my aunt from Laos, they both don't eat the same foods. They cook two different meals.
I don’t understand why people fall in love for people in Facebook.
Q1: what you can do is talk to your husband and all the other brothers and sister in law and have your mother in law live on her own. This will be the best way to solve everything.
Q#1 Nyab 10k me nyab nkauj hmoob mekas koj txhob xav tias koj yog me nyab nkauj hmoob mekas ces koj yuav be able to handle tau cov niam pog nkhaus2 uas com2 viab nawb mog yog koj twb paub tias koj tus niam pog twb nyob tsis haum nws cov nyab hlob lawm ces yog koj tsis xav kom Koj mob stroke ces koj tsis tas lees nrog coj niam pog los nrog koj nyob mog koj tsis tau paub qab hau asking peb cov nyab hmoob nov ov peb mam pab qhia koj mog 🤣🤣
Q#2. Hamburger tsis healthy. Tos nws cholesterol siab siab lo vim nws noj hamburger xwb. 😄😄
Tab sis koj twb yog nws tus pojniam nes. Koj kwj nqa qhov khoom qab zib rau koj lub hnab. Tim koj tsis nqab. Yus tus txiv yus yuav tsum npaj nws tej tshuaj rau yus lub hnab nrog nraim yus.
1st question best advice is to have a sit down with your husband and mother in law. Your home, your the woman of the house, your the wife. Explain to both of them that you can not tolerate your mother in law behavior and attitude much less her personality. The way she's behaving is why she doesn't get along with her other daughter in laws. It is not them but her. Tell your husband that if he doesn't talk to his mother and things continued your going to leave and divorce him.
Q1 Time to face your MIL face to face tell her she need to stop complaining and throwing your foods away. She either do your way or takes the highway. Either your MIL adapt to you get along or get out. Need not to say more .
Secret: Tus txiv hais qhov Labor mas g yog secret tiag2 nws muab zab ua nws li secret xwb os. Kuv tus no mus yug 4 tug baby yeej g muaj qhov tias Dr kom tus txiv mus xauj thaum poj niam yug baby na yog yus hlb yus poj niam ces mus nyob hauv hoob tuav nws tes los yog support yus tus hlb xwb. Thaum tau baby los Dr tsuas noog tus txiv tias seb puas xav txiav hlab nthaw yog yus g txiav ces Dr txiav rau yus xwb tus txiv tsev no na koj muab hais tshaj dhau yam twb g muaj cuag li tej koj tau hais Dr yeej g tau lij poj niam tej chaw mos ib zaug thiab nej cov txiv neej hmoob xiam hlwb aw koj lam tau lam hais tej yam g muaj tseeb li no nawb...
Q1: some Niam pog are just too much....complain every little things! Tiam 21 why MIL still wanted their nyabs too cook or do chores for them?? Come on OG!! this is not Laos!!
Question 1 tell ur husband to regulate that before u do. I don't get why a lot of spouse won't tell their husband what bothers them. That's the person who suppose to keep the peace. If they don't want to take care of it then they can live with their mama alone
We all know the word tawm rooj except you. That was wrong of you
MIL are always victims… talk to your husband because you two need your space with each other without the stress of your MIL. It’s difficult as a newlywed already. Talk to him make him understand your view.
Q1, you need to apologize to your older sister in laws. It's a karma to said that you have high education and you will be able to handle you MIL, please do not complain about it. Uses your expertise to handle her like you said how experienced you are.what goes around comes around.
Q1: Your house your rule sister. Some oldgee like your mother in law have no consideration for other people's feelings.
Q1: I been there I done that, yeah you should distance yourself from a person like your MIL it's annoying it's like a bomb 💣 waiting to ignite. I used to take care of my ex FIL for 2.5 years OMG it's like hell break loose, complaining every day. I cook for him, give him medication, weight him, and take his blood sugar test every day along with appointments and rehabs my brain is about to explode. Do what is right for you and distance yourself from people like her before things escalate worst.
I hate MIL like that
Q1: I hate to be rude but it's comedic that you were so quick to assume that just because you're "educated" and "modern" you can better empathize with the elderly unlike the older "nyabs". Not sure how that even makes sense. Yet..you go on to say you want "personal" time in your home prior to having anyone move in with you. Again, that's funny because who here doesn't want their privacy - forever. It's not something you trial and then easily give up, so that was foolish to say. It's usually people with that mentality that most definitely can't live with or put up with their in-laws. I hope you know that "older nyabs" may not be nice per se, but they still understand and some follow traditional rules, those of which you don't practice; cooking "traditional" food for the elderly, waking up early, tending to the house and chores, letting the elderly "have their way" etc. But, enough with the lecturing and on to your question, you are pretty much out of options. You have 1 of 2 choices, go the "educated and modern" route, which is, your house your rules, typical nyab miskas style, or stick to traditional rules and put up with your elderly nagging MIL. If you go with choice number one, you're ultimately contradicting your character and what you originally tried to pose as - refer to beginning of comment. No one is perfect, therefore there is no such thing as a perfect DIL but I think that's what you thought you were going to be that's why you initially passed judgement on the other DILs. Regardless, good luck to you
Q1: this is what I do with my mil. I tell her I work full time, manage a clean house, and am a mother of 4 all under 13 (5 if she counts her son). She is welcome to eat anything and everything I buy and cook as long as I don't specifically state "mom, pls dont eat this because it's for work or that event." If I cook something u don't like feel free to make something u like and vice versa for me. As far as cleaning and home decor, when she comments all I say is "but I like it this way and I'm going to do it my way" and if she moves something, I put it back and reply as calmly as possible that I like it there. Example: I had a kitchen mat before the sink and she didn't like it. She tossed it out into my garage 3x, I thought it was my husband, keeper putting it back in place without comment. One day in her presence, I just said "nej txhob muab kuv daim ntaub pua taw no pov2 tseg ma, kuv nyiam nws nyob twj ywm no nab."
Take deep breaths, breathe. I know and feel your frustrations. I continue to do what I do and feel that whoever lives with me doesn't like it, they can move out. Reporting to the clan isn't an option for me unless I hear her gossiping about me then we can proceed from there.
You sound like "its my way or the highway" because its "my house". If you cant learn to balance the needs of others but only yourself, all I have to say is good luck, you're gonna need it.
wow, do you really have the guts to tell your mother in law to not eat this because its for work or event? even i dont have the guts to tell my birth mom to not eat or touch certain foods even if its for work or an event. what i do is buy extra so the fam can eat some and i would still have enough for the event. props to you. tell me your ways lol