What Does It Mean To Be Yourself? | Carly Sotas | TEDxYouth@Granville
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 20 พ.ค. 2024
- In a society driven by image and success, learning how to be yourself is one of the most difficult things you'll ever do. Sharing personal challenges and insights from her book "Illusion," Carly Sotas explores how the fear of not being good enough prevents us making an impact and achieving our dreams.
Video production by Kyle Gomes, Ashli Forbes, Joana Lapurga, Zachary Moss, and Marshall Lu.
Carly Sotas is the author of Illusion, a non-fiction book which explores questions of identity, happiness, and success.
As a teenager, Carly read magazines for advice on how to be successful and confident, but was left feeling discouraged and inadequate, because the lifestyle presented seemed unattainable. Motivated by a desire to start a more relatable and authentic conversation, Carly wrote Illusion, sharing her struggles in hopes of letting other young people know that they are not alone in the challenges they face and in their desire to pursue their dreams.
With a passion for youth development and education, Carly serves as the co-program director of Vancouver’s Heart of the City Piano Program, a music education program that provides accessible music lessons to underserved youth. She is also the co-founder of the Pencils of Promise chapter at The University of British Columbia, the global education organization to which she is donating the proceeds from Illusion.
This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at ted.com/tedx
Most genuine Ted X till date ,Thank abhi and niu for recommending this masterpiece
Me
Ayyyyyy
Me too
Even I came here after their recommendations
@@joey9784 ayyy is like basically approving what someone said or did
“The meanest critic you’re ever going to meet is the one you see when you look in the mirror” - Best quote of the century
Yeah... the people who are "being themselves" by dying their hair some unnatural color and making up their own gender... They are not being themselves and they really hate what is looking back at them in the mirror.
Be yourself means:
1. Don't work for social validation.
2. Make your own goals, don't get influenced by others. like he has that Porsche, now my goal is to buy one. Buying Porsche is not bad but the intention is, how you come to that goal or thought.
3. Observe your feelings, emotions and thoughts, and than act.
I would gladly be myself, if only I knew who I ducking am
You don't have to know that honey! :D Chill out and see what comes after that :) If you're a weirdo, like me, own it! Be the best weirdo you can :D
RocketFan what's a weirdo? What society consider a weirdo? What if they are the weirdos? Who's more weirdo us or society who gives us that label? 🙊
ArticFox Queen Your a duck
same.
Brianna if you accept that youre insecure about who you are, you become more secure about your insecurity. You are yourself when you dont think about who you are, follow your instincts and just be.
Be yourself is, act like how you act when nobody around when everybody around you.
But do u mean..i will dowaht i want then there will only be chaos?
Yo! That's hard
*sits there in complete silence*
@@estherv2277 ME lool
This is hard
Be yourself. Figure out what you love and do it everyday. Ignore what other people think, and you'll notice that the right people will begin to gravitate towards you. You'll also start to notice that you care less and less about what others think, because you're perfect the way you are.
People tend to fall into the wrong crowd and become a totally different person to gain popularity and fit in so they forget their true friends for the ones that make them looked better, people try to be better then everyone else but we need to take a second to explore our inner self because we all have potential to be better but first we have to know ourselves better. : )
Very well said!
Ralph waldo Emerson once said..the greatest accompaniment in life is to be yourself when everyone around trying to make you someone else. Very true
Definitely, faithful to oneself
IF only I could have known this sooner, like in high school sooner!
It's never too late!
Angel Peña 👍👌
yeah right !XD
Jesus is the way
i am going to be in high school
Who else is here after abhi and niyu video ?
I don't know why people always say don't change and be true to yourself.. if you think there's is an issue with you, you should change.. if you realise you are not what you want to be (don't be confused with what others want u to be), you have every right to change... Cause if you don't, you would regret it.
I loved this video, and I love the concept of your book. I agree, it's simple to be ourselves, but not always easy. It's a daily practice!!
Just came here watching abhi and niyu shorts, and glad that I saw it , such an inspirational story
Being yourself - When a stranger knows and loves you better than the ones you love.
I felt this
last year i was so happy with myself because i had a friend that i could truly be myself with, he convenienced me that i could be myself no matter who i was with. unfortunately, i lost contact with him and now, im very very uncertain of who i am anymore. one day, I'm the cool kid and the other day I'm the quite kid. i am pretty confident but i feel like if i don't act a certain way, people wouldn't like me.
Everyone goes through some dilemma in their personal life. Once you share this story with someone and tell them how you got past it, the other person will see you as an inspiration
i was having a hard day and i was crying all day long but then i saw this amazing ted talk and you made my day 😍😍😍
Life always teaches us something. The topic is simple but powerful. You are not alone. I like that! BTW I am also a teen.
finding yourself is a lifelong journey. I always try to trust the universe that you will make the right decisions. But to be honest I struggle with being me too. Just made a video about it. Maybe you can relate. :)
@@maartenspaargaren2617 are you doing alright?
Absolutely beautiful talk, Carly! This is what brave looks like!
It's a good speech. But I would love to hear someone talk about the benefits of being yourself who has a mediocre job and an okay income, yet finds pride and dignity in being themselves during the mediocre points of their lifes.
It's actually inspiring speech ...it takes a lot of courage to be vulnerable while mostly we want is to be liked by society and for that attention we start trying to become another person which we are not...
Thank you sooo much you gave me a confidence to be myself , and I really mean it cause every time I'm in hard time i just remember you saying "just be yourself " 💕
This speech is exactly my life, it's insane.
Same here
Same here too
Same here
The Beauty of Freedom is Immeasurable
The Satisfaction of Dignity is Divine
You Do Not Need to be Someone You Are Not
JUST you are FINE
The world Needs You
Because There is Only One You
And Only You Can Be You, Like You Do
LOVE from Cappadocia!
Being myself if I be myself people would think I’m weird so I gotta learn don’t let other people opinions control u and wat u wanna do that’s a fact 100%
I totally agree with you
Thankyou for sharing this my friend, very well said, I was bullied when I was in elementary and high school. It was difficult and I didn't feel like I was worth anything. I felt like I didn't matter to anyone. But people like you sharing this with everyone gives hope in light of this. I'm from Canada as well. Hope all works out for you, be blessed my friend and thankyou again for sharing from your heart.
That's a one subject everyone can relate to.
Just feeling emotional about the I Am Enough part. 3 words but they are so deep. And I see so many people struggling with their confidence. I AM Enough. We are all Enough. Thank you Carly. For this.
words worked to me 2
trust the universe and everything will be alright :)
Thank you for being such an inspiration. You summed up all I feel and helped me figure out that instead of living for others opinions, I should live for mine’s.
Carly what a remarkable young woman you are. Ignore the negativity - a lot of it I'm sure comes from a place of envy or self loathing. Most of those commenting on your youth/inexperience were probably not as clued up as you clearly are when they were your age. Keep walking up that mountain - you are doing so well.
That was an amazing speech and I really feel like the message expressed in that should be spread
Beautiful courageous soul. Destined for greatness. Thank you, bless you and all your dreams come true.
Carly! You're doing great! Keep becoming more and more real and authentic, and much more people will be drawn to you!
I am also struggling in this area. It is not an easy path but I know I must blast through all this fear of rejection in order to live a life that is fulfilling and purposeful! Be yourself and show yourself to this world, inspire people! The world is waiting for you to be the real you, to impact this world!
Niiiiiiiiiice
yess!!
Go girl! That was a brilliant speech and really hit home for me. Sticking together, supporting people through hard times and showing your insecurities to others will help ourselves and everyone else too! You are right! Being yourself is a journey I believe and we don't need to beat ourselves up for not knowing, just keep going, try new things! And do what feels right 🙂
We're all children going through things, in order to GROW through things. It takes a while to realize (never entertain in what's going on in somebody else's mind), you will find yourself jacked up because of other people's thoughts; at the same time... it makes us who we become. These are the kind of talks to help us all, because we all have a story. Beautiful, great talk, and thank you young lady.
The way I see it, being yourself is about striving to become the person that you want to be, so that you don't feel annoyed by your own flaws more than necessary.
For example, if you are shy and you wish that you were more social then you would be yourself after you have improved your social skills and become comfortable with that.
I agree but i also think being yourself if waking up to who you are in this exact moment
This sounds nice and I think a lot of people can relate to it, because it takes no effort to say: Iam enough. But from psychology we know, people need challenges, growth and work in order to prosper mentally as well. Therefore just being yourself is not enough. Constant progress in life, even if it's smalle steps, having the feeling of getting ahead etc. is what helps you longlasting and not just in the moment , to feel good about yourself. That's at least what I have learned over time.
What is progress in life? I think we mix up ourselves with our social and economic status in this Western society. I agree we should strive for self improvement but I also think we should be in tune with ourselves as ultimately material success isn't as rewarding as being comfortable with who we are as people.
This, this was powerful for me, I've always beat myself up for my fixations and ideas, and some other people did to all throughout schooling. I was afraid of judgment, I still am but I working on that, I know this sounds silly, but I want to hug you
can relate with you 100%. finding yourself is a lifelong journey. My advise would be to trust the universe that you will make the right decisions. and give yourself a little self love XD But to be honest I struggle with it too. Just made a video about it. Maybe you can relate. :)
Beautiful, touched me deeply. Thanks for being so genuine!
Be yourself because you have a responsibility to inspire those who also have the fear of being judged!
Thankyou Carly !!❤️
Great talk! So helpful! Look forward to reading your book.
The heart is a compass and a brain navigator, the main thing is that they work smoothly, together.
Be yourself because an original one is better than a copy❤️❤️
Be genuine, it makes you likeable.
True .
One of the finest ted talks I mean just the way she spoke she told us about each our lives story and how we judge ourself too often to be not good enough when we are the one who are good enough for everything periodt.
Thank you for sharing your vulnerability. It really resonates with me. I just ventured out today as a blog assistant. Truly we are our own worst critics. I want to put up on my mirror: I am enough!
Very relatable emotions we all go through in different phases of life and beautifully expressed.
this has been one of my favorite ted talks. It has actually been super helpful, thank you! and you are the cutest! And that's not all that you are :)
Very sweet and honest message from this young woman. Great message for everyone!
Cant imagine how much i needed this tonight. Thank you
Well done, remarkably inspiring speech!!!
this is so much inspire me
This is the most genuine and inspiring tedx I have ever heard of. Thankyou so much❤
This hit me right in the heart.
Big like to this woman. She answers me a big question was in my mind since I was little. How to be yourself and I was confused that I wasn't smat enough or i wasn't good enough but now I now that I am enough and being living with people and having experiences every day we spend and every challenge we do in our lives is very enough for me because this is being yourself is trusting yourself and test it everytime of a new adventure.
this video just changed my whole mind
Pity I didn't have this video when I was a teenager in high school
One of the most inspiring videos ever. Thank you 🙏🏻🥰❤️
It's the speech, we all can relate. I thank abhi and niyu for suggesting this💕
Be urself man!!!. .. . . The way u r. .
We are human 1st - but we need to be able to learn how to accept our inner being.
Everyone has a different and inspiring story based on their experiences. So facts should not be ignored just because of that age numbers.
One of the best tedx talks i've seen ever.
Thank you for sharing your beautiful thoughts
it is that simple : human being are a set of influences which means that every person in life acts and speak and thinks according to what they see in other people if you simply could not be influenced by any other person and act on your own then you be yourself that is very hard but not impossible
The meanest critic you are ever gonna face is the person you see when you look in the mirror. 🙏🏻
One of the best TeDxTalks out there 🙏
14:23 you are right and I don't care what other people thinks about me but even my parents think I'm not good enough in anything anything at all I'm just the worst son they could possibly get
Same🤐
Thank you
I can't thank you enough, really. That was amazing, will share with others :)
I have also come to the conclusion that I may be able to help ONE person, and that makes me happy. ❤️
Be yourself, there's no one better 😊❤
You are 💪
Inspirational
That was so inspiring ❤️
I really like this. This was very genuine and relatable and it makes me happy to know other people are having similar issues amd over coming them
Beautiful Speech 💕
This is a worthwhile look into this ambiguous and well-meaning directive that we all struggle with or wonder about.
Thanks for sharing your experience
Thank you for sharing your story 😊
I learnt a lot from this, thank you do much Carly!😁
We must believe in ourselves.
Thank you Niu and Abhi for recommending this
Amazing!
I'm new here and you really spoke the truth. Thank you that inspired me a lot.
I love this!!
really touched me thank you
Truly inspiring
This is just what I felt. Kind of above amazing
one of the best ted talk ever 👍
Really needed to hear this!!
Being yourself is too easy but sometimes I have to be more cautious. I hate people looking at me because it makes me feel like I'm weird so I just don't look at them and they won't see me. Sometimes at school I have to think what I say (not like normally it's even if I'm trying to be nice) because I want to sound as unnatractive as possible and not make tell other people so they don't try and talk to me for like 10 minutes so that I seem quite normal. Those are the only exceptions to being myself. I'm very happy to not be the weirdest person in my class or craziest person because if I was I wouldn't be happy with myself. I'm as beautiful as everyone else in my opinion but my school has a uniform which lowers that because it makes me look too normal.
Ok but why is this me though💀 i dont want to speak for longs periods of times sometimes so id rather just not say anything but tbh im sure this has to do with self esteem
THANK YOU
you are a amazing speaker!!!
Thank you !
Wow...that was real and amazing
Just thank you~
I appreciate your perspective - being one's self is what life is all about! I actually define who I am in the last video on my channel - I encourage everyone to do something similar: Define WHO YOU ARE, and then stay committed to stay true to yourself no matter what.
Yes. We have all beat ourselves up and worry about what other people think at one point in life. Learning to do it less is something we can do together. I am not sure about should, though.
For most of my life i didnt know what it meant to be myself, but when i turned 15
I bought a guitar cuz i didnt know on what to spent all my money that i was collecting
And shortly after i realised that my passion is music, and i finally knew what i want to pursue in life, and I liked singing also, but there is one issue im afraid to sing out loud and im really shy person hopefully i will try to get over IT but its hard, and for me IT mean to be myself, to not be afraid of doing what u like to do or behavior how you want to, and i know its good to get out of our comfortzones and I'll try to, and hope some of u struggling out there, too 😊🤗 ( sorry for my english if its bad,
I see a lot of blue lines under the words
so i guess IT may have lot of mistakes )
Loved it !❤