"Fear of losing the marriage"? The marriage is most certainly dead and ki!!ed by the cheater.
And who would ever want to touch the spouse who's allowed another to go where no other was ever supposed to go?
Well, it's hard I agree with you but here is the FACT. Jesus confronted a woman who was caught in an adultery action and her death time came to stone her. He forgave her, he washed her, and he gave her a new life. That is a simple example. With God everything is possible. We need that GRACE in our life and I know it's hard but not impossible.
Why are you making that assumption that you want to put the marriage back together? Your reaction may depend on your feelings and not on what your "decision" is.
My wife and I are going through divorce, and I would love some advice as to how I could convince her (potentially going through Limerence) to watch this and show her that this is an opportunity to explore reconciliation.