The thing is i can make eye contact the problem is it’s super intimidating and it will shift away really quickly or I’ll just feel uncomfortable. Many times i’m just looking at the person’s eye makeup. It looks like i’m making eye contact and listen but i don’t do neither. I just either “judge” an awful makeup look or if i like it i’m analyzing how to do it on myself. Like my English teacher thinks i listen so passionately her lectures when in reality i’m just looking at her poorly done brows
That's actually pretty hilarious lol. I also fond at times that when someone's talking I tend to scan them over and analyze things physically about them. It's not always to bad of an instinct, especially on the street when you run into garbage and have to scan for weaponry
I usually go for th nose. Brows are good too, really anything Clos the eyes. Sometimes I bounce from mouth, to help me understand what they are saying to nose to mimic eye contact.
I actually am quite good at household tasks, probably because I prefer routines, and it's reinforcing my ability to adult. Doing a load of washing is more important to me than socialising, and far less stressful.
I'm rather untidy and can be around my own mess. However that's more due to routine than anything else. I prefer to do tasks on set days at or about a set time, than do it spontaneously. The anxiety of doing things spontaneous is worse than being untidy.
Literally when it comes to self care I have less of a problem keeping myself clean and looking presentable. Its the actual important stuff like eating and using the bathroom and stepping outside that I cant seem to remember
1) repetitive Behavior 2) Avoid eye contact 3) non verbal 4) delayed speech 5) obsessive interest 6) Social awkwardness 7) difficulty relating to people 8) Social anxiety 9) Bad objective function 10) Poor communication skills
As a kid I had no problem talking in front of a whole church full of people but had difficulties speaking in front of small groups. A dozen people staring at me presenting a school project nearly made me pass out from anxiety. I think the reason was that I didn't have to look at anyone when there were a lot of people, it was just a crowd of faces I could easily forget were even there.
I had no idea that I was going to have anxiety talking in front of a classroom. I had no problem talking in the class, so, when I gave a speech in my speech class, I wasn't worried. Until I got up to do it.....
Questioning at the moment and I totally feel this. I can perform in front of a lot of people because it feels impersonal and I’m just doing a thing but the moment that gets stripped back and I have to navigate medium sized groups or multiple groups I get completely lost. Either saying nothing or failing to shut up because something happened to trigger my “will not shut up about this topic” part of me.
My entire life I’ve always been wondering why I can’t relate or connect easily with people and I’ve suffered highly because of it, but learning about my autism is helping me so much in accepting this
im like 99% sure i have undiagnosed autism, and as a result of that my childhood has been hurtful and traumatic. i understand exactly where youre coming from
As a female, I wonder if one of the differences between genders might be how we experience empathy. I definitely suffer from empathy Hulked out. That said, I don’t often react the way people expect me to, when they speak to me. The feelings are there. I just don’t react how they expect. Dunno🤷🏻♀️
We do have empathy - too much - and because we find ourselves getting caught in the emotions of others (no breaking mechanism frontal lobe cortex leading from sad to depressed to suicidal ideation) switch off in self-preservation. So we're labelled "on empathy by-pass". Usually we have high moral standard and sense of justice and will be the first to give (labelled "generous").
As someone who was afab, I somehow can relate to both gender “specific” symptoms. I don’t have “set” routine type repetitive behaviours but in other areas of my life I participate in other repetitive behaviours, although I can also have super strong empathy sometimes I really don’t, like you, I react differently to what someone would typically expect, so really I’d honestly just say it varies from person to person.
I was recently diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder, and I find your videos much more informative in understanding my diagnosis than the vast majority of influencers. Most influencers treat autism like it's a quirky trait, not a debilitating disorder. In fact, most of their experiences are the complete opposite of what you've experienced. They talk about love and relationships like any neurotypical. In reality, most autistic people have never experienced love or a relationship.
Delayed speech, you forgot advanced speech and reading. Mobility stages, coordination difficulty, I had early speech ability, skipped crawling, high reflex rate, spatial and situational awareness. Socially I was very shy, unable to initiate and maintain a conversation especially small talk unless it’s about a common interest.I really don’t care about convention and need to really go through the rules mentally, consciously. Slipped through the cracks, I’m 50+ was diagnosed last year.
I’m diagnosed with ASD and one of the things brought up in my diagnosis report about eye contact was not that I avoid it, but that I make TOO MUCH (‘intense’, apparently 🤣) eye contact and I don’t know how to properly regulate it by looking away at appropriate times. I didn’t know this was a thing until the psychologist brought it up!
Yep...i've been told many times since early childhood that i scare ppl with my intense eye contact..they feel like i'm looking right into them (i am but not on purpose, & even if i do very little eye contact it happens anyway..their emotions are Screaming so loud it's impossible to block them out)..and i am Not exactly judging them...but they think i am...& to that i wonder to myself..why?...& even if i was, why should they care?....apparently, so i hear, those folks seem to feel guilty about something & believe i'm going to 'blow their cover'...this is..actually..quite disturbing to me as well.. NewsFlash!..NOT my business, ppl..unless..you are Hurting someone/s...are you? Can't help myself..i am a Champion of the Underdog...& in todays deranged world..that can get one Killed.(kill me, ok, i would consider it a Mercy killing actually) Maybe..that is what they are sensing from my 'stare'..a Fearless Protector of the innocent & defenseless..idk........so..i actively avoid people as much as is possible. i am Hermiting More & More lately since the Majority are suffering from something i cannot deal well with. Rabid Hate. Their Mouthy Obnoxious Meanness craze is on such a Sharp Rise & more contagious than a plague, so, i do Not Want to be around them.
I either agressively stare at people in the eyeballs, or make no contact and look everywhere but your eyes. There is no inbetween 😂. Its either ive been staring into your eyes as im talking and not looking away to the pointbit makes you uncomfortable. Or I look away and never look at your eyes
Also great to see you're still active on here, I wondered why I haven't seen your videos and I realised it looks like maybe TH-cam unsubscribed me, is this a thing??
As a child I was obsessed with dogs. Then Pokémon came out and then I was obsessed with Pokémon until today at 36 my bedroom is covered in Pikachu and I own a cat, lol. But in all seriousness, my Pokémon obsession was something I was deeply embarrassed about. But it helped my therapist realize I might have been on the spectrum. Which eventually led to my adult diagnosis and answered a ton of questions about why I was such a “strange” child.
I am 37 I always loved Pokemon. 😊😊😊 I was hyped for the games to come put and gifted my old gameboy to my Sister I gpt a new color one so we could play together😊😊😊
I’m 36 as well and say the share what you just said my gf is diagnosed asd but I’m not but she wonders if I’m on the spectrum . I can’t explain my Pokémon obsession as a soon to be 37 year old man
I'm a 41yo undiagnosed Aspie. I definitely relate to all this. That executive function you mentioned is my biggest issue I wish I could change. I just get lost easily. Also, I have a very monotone voice and expressionless face. I wish I had a dollar for every time in life some stranger has told me to cheer up. Uh, no, this is my face 24/7. I wish I could be as well spoken and have an inflection in my voice and good facial expressions like you. And as for the eye contact, had a supervisor once yell at me for not keeping eye contact with him. I just can't keep eye contact, nope. Too uncomfortable.
I couldn't make eye contact until 2 years ago. Then I decided I wanted to make a connection with people, now I make too much eye contact and it freaks people out. I can read people so well through their eyes, I'm not looking at them but into them. Too much intimacy for most to be comfortable with and if someone has bright blue eyes I just get lost in them.
I have to really think about looking people in the eye so doing it means I don’t hear what they’re saying because I’m telling myself to look them in the eye. Im not non verbal but situational mutism likes to get me at all sorts of random times.
Same for me. I can actually hear them better if I don’t look them in the eye. And if I’m preoccupied with something I don’t hear anyone and I end up not responding to what they say.
I have the same problem, situational mutism can come out of nowhere and appear as shyness or in some cases come across as being "dumb" to other people. I would love to talk but sometimes the words just don't come, it's often made worse with eye contact.
@ValentínF. Most people will just think you are shy, not rude. As a child I got told that I had to look other people in the eye but I just couldn't. I then tried to focus on their nose or mouth and started staring instead (because I obviously didn't know how long I should look at someone) and I guess that was considered rude. Now I just try to look in their direction and I think it is good enough.
These are the classics, usually applicable to boys/men who present the classic signs. Women and girls present their autism more often than not in totally different ways, and mask the living daylights out of life. Unfortunately the medical community at large has only a global knowledge of the classical signs but no knowledge of what experts now realise are more subtle or different representations that most women show. Yo samdy sam is a great channel that discusses the differences between the "old" autism stereotypes and how science is figuring out that it is far more complex. Other than that great channel and thank you for your time and effort to making these videos.
I struggle with eye contact. It's gotten slightly better as an adult. As a child, I would pull my hair over my face and stare at the floor. Back in the day we were called "gifted children", because at the time you could not receive an autism diagnosis unless you were totally non-verbal.
ADHD and ASD they sometimes fight each other. For me I have a lack of social skills unless it's very specific settings. I never know what to say, I'm so awkward all the time I kinda tend to just hide in a corner most of the time, eye contact is soo hard...I mentally have to remind myself to look at someone's face every interaction. I'm obsessed with photography and if I want a particular shot I will hyper focus like a mad woman (duck and birds of prey) and with obs ford pickups. I am terrible at tidying. it doesn't compute. I've always felt like the odd man out. Glad to know I'm not the only one
I'm currently on my journey to get diagnosed with ASD. I know I have ADHD. But the more I look into ASD, the more I realize a lot of my daily behaviors fall into the spectrum.
This week, a psychologist told me i have suspected autism. There's a two-year waiting list to start the full diagnostic programme. I think they will expedite my application, owing to my age (51), but I'm still expecting it to take months.
why do you want a diagnosis? I am 58 and just found out via the many you tube videos that I have asd. I am still in shock and afraid to tell anyone. not sure a piece of paper is going to make any difference now, managed it badly for all these years thinking i was just shy and gets depression often
@@eyecatcher1509well, not to answer for them but for me, yes for sure. I’m in the same boat, and I am 40. I could tell that just with the ten year difference in my husband and I, that he had a MUCH different impression of autism. You don’t need me to tell you, it comes with a stigma.
I've been all my life told off for my behaviour at school because I wasn't able to speak most of the time even though I could speak to an interrogation and also my dad told off all the time because I speak just when I was at home. I'm 33 and just last year I realized I'm in the spectrum and I feel finally I don't have to be ashamed for my behaviour and now waiting for a diagnosis who will be takes 3 years.
My whole life I was seen as a weirdo, the silent girl, the girl who has no friends, the freak. For many years I was struggling and wondering what was wrong with me, why I wasn't more like people of my age during childhood, adolescence and now starting my adulthood For the last few months thanks to a series I noticed some traits I share with a character, since then I started wondering about if I am autistic but undiagnosed this whole time. I've been searching and watching lots of videos and channels here on TH-cam about the autistic spectrum from autistic people and doctors and I feel understood and probably also I may have ADHD, now I found this video and I actually feel I finally found the answer, also I'm going to find a specialist to give me a diagnose, thank you so much for this video.
It happens and I felt the same way. I first thought I had social anxiety then the therapist brought up ASD. Though out our sessions I now realize that he was assessing me and I completed some questionnaire of some kind. I was diagnosed and my dad was spooked. I thought about ADHD but he said that I didn’t present enough for that. It’s a long process , it took my more than a month so it’s pretty long
I can't thank you enough, for one existing!! But for two!! Sharing all of this information!! I am waiting to get diagnosed bc I just keep watching people on the autism spectrum and keep finding new words or even short descriptions about what I experience! Love it!
I have: 1. Yes. 2. Yes. 3. No. 4. No. 5. Yes. 6. Yes. 7. Not sure. Some situations but excellent in others. I'm hyper sensitive to other's mood. 8. Yes. 9. Yes. Hugely. 10. No. I'm 52 but have complained to Doctors for year that "something isn't right" but they can't see it. They tested me for Autism ten years ago, just a small questionnaire, but it came back negative. I'm doing another now for Aspergers.
That’s nice. But also, just FYI, “Aspergers” isn’t a diagnosis anymore. It’s just “Autism Spectrum Disorder” (or ASD). You won’t have a test for Aspergers.
@@d609n Yes people can have these traits from “time to time” but the fact that it is only a “time to time” thing means it likely doesn’t effect them as an individual as much. This is for people that face this EVERYDAY throughout their ENTIRE LIFE which makes life considerably MORE difficult to manage without the proper support. So yes a lot of people deal with these issues.. but when you are autistic it isn’t from “time to time” it is ALL the time.
Watching your videos really gives me hope. My son was just diagnosed with autism 2 on the spectrum.. I’m learning so much and realizing how amazing and unique you guys are. I am so happy to find your channel. Thank you, this gives me hope for the future
I love this video! I’ve been wondering if I’ve had autism for the longest time, and I definitely have some of these symptoms. The eye contact, obsessiveness over a topic, and social anxiety are the key ones. Thanks for this video, it helped a lot!
1. Check. Same detailed routine every morning. Coincidentally with breakfast. 2. Check. Never look at anyone in the eyes. 3. Check. Mutism in childhood, limited verbal interaction now. 4. Check. 5. Check. I learn everything about something I'm interested in. 6. Check. 7. Check. 8. Big check. 9. Check, but get around it with routine. 10. Check. Can communicate better with writing than verbally. I think I could be on the spectrum.
Here is a fun one: As you get older your sensitivity to noises can increase over time, meaning quieter stuff can get louder Here is a real fun one as in interesting and not bad: If you have a preference for eyes like colors shapes styles that sooths you or you simply enjoy looking at then when you look someone in the eyes for long enough you start hallucinating their eyes into what you like looking at as your brain is attempting to cause comfort and not overload you as it recognize "I like looking at this and it calms me so let's just apply it". For me i like looking at Black Sclera as in the white of the eyes being black as it just feels more natural so my brain makes it like that so i can stare at it for hours meaning "proper" eye contact as stare too long and the other person freaks out that you are staring at them. I never said it was perfect, but it works
This just came to me but I’ve noticed that I’m obviously horrible at small talk (HATE IT SO MUCH) but what’s funny is because I can’t do small talk I will end up talking about really deep topics RIGHT AWAY which makes people uncomfortable. Or ill talk about something I’m obsessing over at the moment and people will be confused.
I thought I was one of those people who experienced face blindness, but come to find out I just don’t spend enough time looking at faces to make memory imprint. Lol
I can't believe it keeps showing ABA therapy commercials in autism videos. Those goons scarred me for life. We're not broken! And we definitely don't need our legs cut off for no worse than a scrape or bruise. That said thanks for doing this video Dan. I have trouble with eye contact and understanding people too.
I notice that I can be fine in groups of large people, as long as I don't need to interact with them, like at an amusement park. However, the moment I need to socially interact with a group of any size I simply cannot, and it gets worse the larger the group is.
Issues with eye contact was something my mom noticed when I was a baby. She said that she knew I was different was from the first moment she saw me- but not in a bad way. But one time one of my mom’s friends tried to talk to me and of course I looked away. And this lady goes, “She’s a little brat isn’t she?” And if my mom hadn’t been holding me, she would punched this woman. As far as obsession goes, my parents always told me not to become obsessed with whatever I was liking at the time. I had to learn to curb it as much as I could, which meant I couldn’t talk about what I wanted to talk about. For example, tv shows and movies were and are how I relate to the world, to people, to myself, so they are very meaningful for me. So, if I find a movie or show that’s important to me, I want to talk about it. In middle school, I was bullied pretty bad. I actually don’t remember much of those 3 years but I remember how I felt. And it was the shows and movies that helped me through it. It was Star Wars the original trilogy, and Star Trek:TNG, then Stargate Sg-1 which is still my absolute favorite show, and I just wanted to share my thoughts and things that happened in them because I was trying to explain a part myself and I love stories. I had been writing stories since I learned how to write. And even before then I made picture books. I still write to this day.
Wow. I- wow. I can strongly relate to the movies/shows and writing one. As a preschool kid I was an early reader. As a school kid, I would read TONES of books, loved movies and shows. They just, idk, made sense. Like you can actually tell what the character is going through and why they're going through it, unlike in the real world, where you only get pieces of information. Like suddenly this person is unpleasant to you, but you kinda have to assume that maybe they're having a bad day because something happened prior to your meeting and it's not your fault. As a school kid, I would participate in those spelling competitions, where a teacher would read you a text and you had to write it down and they'd look for misspellings. In the third grade, I scored first in the "spelling, math, general nature knowledge" third grader competition in my 60-thousand-inhabitants town. The spelling one can obviously be attributed to the tones of books I read. I also score high in the IQ tests (according to the official test by Mensa I took part in when I was 15ish, I'm among 1% most intelligent people in the world, lmao, another reason for school kids to hate me, should they ever find out) and I would usually score at least first in school in the international Mathematical Kangaroo competition, which is a lot about pattern recognition and noticing certain logical traps etc. If there's one thing I would consider my special interest, something that's been with me since early childhood, it's stories and storytelling. And I too need to talk to people about it. Having moved a lot, including to another country, and having only ever known how to "make" "friends" (in practice 1-2 close people) in school setting, I ended up only having friends I met online a few years ago in a language exchange group (another big interest of mine is linguistics, especially grammar, like how different languages work). They are usually the "victims" of me venting about shows etc., alongside sometimes my mom and most frequently, YT comment sections because that's one of the places where people actually wanna read it and often start such conversations, lol. Especially those music videos about a show or a certain character or group. I remember finding some note while cleaning up my room that said "I will have written a book by my 13th birthday". Well, didn't quite work out :D. But I am developing a story of my own and I do hope to finish and publish it one day. Storytelling is just how I see and understand the world. Like I know it is gonna sound super insensitive, and I acknowledge the absolute devastating tragedy that it was, but to me WWII is mostly just a source of amazing stories. Shows and movies that were made based on it, stories that actual survivors share etc. Especially coming from Poland, which during that period of time had, to my knowledge, the biggest underground army and even an entire underground state, with underground government, entire justice system, universities, schools etc. etc. I feel like through the hundreds, if not thousands of stories I have consumed over my 24 years of life, in a way I understand people better than they do understand themselves, if that makes sense. Doesn't help me an inch in socializing though, lmfao. BTW Just noticed your comment about how you were diagnosed a week ago (now 3ish weeks, I guess). Congrats on having the courage to seek diagnosis :)! I read and heard stories saying the process can be really rough, especially if you meet the wrong person. I should probably talk to my mom in more details about the traits and such from when I was a child, because honestly, probably because of my partially traumatic child, I forgot most things about my childhood, lol. Problem is, she doesn't speak English so I can't exactly send her one of these videos, I should probably look up some Polish ones. And autism has become another special interest of mine, I guess :D and for some reason I usually don't wanna show on the outside that I obsess over things. Thanks for coming to my TEDTalk, lol, but it's usual for me to write an entire chapter in a comment. Talk about a kid who read too much in her life.
@@Kasiarzynka 100% agree with everything you said- except spelling and math are my worst subjects (turns out I have dyscalculia, a learning disability. So I can completely understand a math concept but I can’t do an equation without a calculator). I also started studying people when I was in kindergarten, so psychology and behavior is another interest of mine. Anthony Hopkins did the same as a kid!
@@cjradenbaugh as to psychology, I even was considering becoming a psychologist, partially because I wanted to study it because I felt like it'd help in my writing, partially because it felt like I was pretty good at mediating, at least in like school kids setup. It's just that I don't side up with anyone and kinda spectate it from outside, and I honestly do that to this day with pretty much every "controversial" topic. If there's only one person, I can kinda assume the role supporting the idea opposite to that person's. Say if they're pro death penalty (which I feel very meh about, like I can see the pros and cons but don't really have an opinion, nor do I feel competent enough to have one), I will argument against it, and if they're against it, I'll argument for it. I think it has something to do with the conviction that we can only expand our horizons on such matters by having a civilized discussion. I can also work the other way around and assume the same position as the person if I don't feel comfortable opposing them. I have this uncle who's very "people who support other parties are idiots". I showed him a photo of in-school parliament simulation where his party scored one of the lowest (they won that election countrywide btw). He said "you better don't show your political sympathies then". He was convinced I supported them (they're my least favorite party btw) just because when the topic showed up I would subconsciously bring up their points I agreed with. I'm a human chameleon, lmao.
In high school the social cues I had the most trouble understanding others feelings main reason why it was hard for me to maintain relationships as I got older (currently 31) I'm able to empathize a bit more, and also have better control with the eye contact I still have trouble multitasking and getting used to change in routines at times, and the anxiety I get whenever I'm around crowds of people.
I have always had problems with eye contact. It just feels too intimate unless I’m really close to someone and even then I still need frequent breaks. 😮
i should have been diagnosed with autism when i was very young. but the doctor thought my parents were trying to get money from the government so they denied my the diagnosis. so i eventually joined the military and ended up getting medically discharged at 100% disability for schizophrenia. and just recently was diagnosed with autism. i caused a lot of problems in a competitive world of the military. they gave me a rifle with ammo. and told me to shoot a target. almost my entire career in the military i had a failed rifle score.
I feel this but more cos when I got assessed, I didn’t go through the whole process so I didn’t check enough of those stupid boxes cos it wasn’t done thoroughly enough. It was rushed and too focused on the stereotype at the time so I was given the diagnosis of being borderline for Apsergers. I have since experienced doctor’s appointments that feel like they’re avoiding or afraid to diagnose properly; and by the time my mum requested a CAMHS referral due to my obsessive behaviour at the time, I’d had my meltdowns treated as Anger Management issues by my school and had most of my other traits badically ignored or overlooked. It’s only now I’ve struggled with a spike in my ADHD traits in Uni that I’m seeking a private assessment and diagnosis for both ASD and ADHD (I got the package deal), a decision I made before finding out the atrocious waiting time I’d suffer from with the NHS.
I also have adhd and the thing with routines and repetitive behaviour is that i do have some repetitive behaviour(like needing to listen to music everytime i get ready if i don’t listen to music i don’t get ready or needing a bottle of water next to my bed or else i don’t sleep or needing a specific order for my workouts) but like my adhd ass makes it impossible to stick to too many routines or to not like some variety. And obsessive interests now that’s definitely my most “out there” autistic trait. When i was 6 my mom says i was so obsessed with Daisy duck that i wanted to be a duck and was making all the damn time duck noises and was tellin everyone my name is daisy.Now are animals(mostly cats) pop culture(music mostly but love reality tv and celeb gossip more than i should too) fashion and makeup and game of thrones Like i’m usually so quiet at school unless my classmates bring up about Kardashians Kanye West or Beyonce then i somehow won’t shut my mouth. My best friend hasn’t even watched game of thrones yet and she doesn’t want to bcuz i already told her everything that happened since i watched it once rewatch Short clips on Instagram and TH-cam and now planning to rewatch it fully again
I had a relationship with a girl and I found a lot of similarities in her with my brother who is already have asperger diagnosis. She just struggling in social situations and a lot more specific autistic thing, like she was frustrated even going out in the garden basicly she was calm at home and watching tv, she wasnt able fall in sleep without tv going in the backround, and mostly she want to some disney movie (26y old) So we already lived together at her parents. She stopped her studies multiple times and start a new one last 2 years just 5 times because she wasnt be able communicate alone, misunderstood people and always think people hate her or disrespect her. And the naivity, lack of emphaty, ton of weird routin and lot more… I tried to introduce her but she aint accept it… Her parents help her out mostly in everything. We just break up and now I watching your channel and I want to learn more and more about the topic. But it’s sad there are a lot of people misunderstood for a life and have difficulties in simple things just like to go in the grocery. I want to say thank you for your activity on youtube a lot more people need to be informed.
The most misunderstood personalities types are INFJ INTJ and also INFP INTP, I think all intuitives types are misunderstood by the sensing types. (MBTI, 16 personalities types, 16 way of functioning, 16 way of thinking) Learning the 8 cognitives function and typology like the MBTI for example helped me a lot to understand a lot of things in life, amazing knowledge (cf "Frank James" channel for example)
you can have a strong empathy, I do too, but even though I feel and understand let's say when someone is upset, I don't know how to properly respond, because when I am upset I do not like to be touched but many people want a hug or pat on the back. I don't mean you don't care and have empathy for them, its the communication to that person letting them know you empathize with them.
I’m really glad I found these videos because for over 20 years I’ve been trying to hard to figure out what about my life was so different and why I behave so differently from my peers. This is the first time I’ve heard anyone with the same line of disorders as myself, but i as well have OCD ADHD dyslexia and Asperger’s, and have had the hardest time figuring out that I’m on the spectrum. Ive always had non verbal episodes that would span into days or tip toe through the house and squeal. My partner always finds the squeals amusing and cute but honestly it feels like I’m performing in a spiral most times lol These videos have really helped me to understand a lot that I haven’t. Thank you for taking the time to inform people and also help inform ourselves
Thank You So Much For This Info! I will get on my son on why he kept watching the same thing over and over all the time... I feel Horrible for that, and now I understand.. but I'm heartbroken for getting after him al the time😭😭😭 I Love My Boy
Out of these 10 i relate to 4/10 and these include 1st one Repetitive behaviour, 2nd one is Eye contact issues, 3rd one is number 5 obseesive interests and the last one I relate to is number 7 which is difficulty relating to people so thanks for the video
My friend who is a psychiatrist told me at a party 2 weeks ago that I have A.S.D, I was taken back a bit by this diagnosis because I always thought I perhaps had ADHD, but more of an ADD which is more of an inattentive subtype that doesn't experience hyperactivity. I felt so small in that moment, like I was a totally different person to others and that if people could tell I was on the spectrum or if they were told that I was on the spectrum that they would treat me as a little bit special. Even though my mate is a psychiatrist I still haven't got an official diagnosis, so maybe I don't but whether I like to admit it or not I do have a lot of trouble making eye contact because it feels a bit overwhelming, looking at someone in the eye, although of course I can do it if I have to. Furthermore, admittedly I have difficulties with flow of conversations, like taking turns and speaking too loud. Although, I feel that there are so many symptoms that I don't have that made me laugh taking an online test because many symptoms seemed absolutely ridiculous to suggest that I exhibit these. However, that is why it is called a spectrum and many symptoms would not be present in different people with autism, especially high functioning autism which is what I would have. I am 29 years old and live independently out of home, hold a job, have a degree and am in the final year of my second degree. I also have friends and even though I struggle with it a bit I can get laid and have had girlfriends in the past (this is a great relief as that would suck been too autistic to not get laid). Sorry if this was information overload, might be another sign of autism but this is why we are here!
I've got a statistical question. How often, to people on the spectrum, end up dating other people, on the spectrum, without open knowledge of the other person's autism?? Bloody hell!! That's a long drawn out sentence. Lol. I gravitate to certain people, without knowing. I just feel comfortable with them. Because I don't feel like running away. But, yeah, would be interesting to find out. Thank you!! Be safe and well 🌞🌻🌞
Till I was an adult, it was horses. All day, everyday. Up until a couple of years ago, it was plants/ gardening. I also have short lived interests/ obsessions (days-weeks).
Thank you for this, I'm 41 and didn't find out why life had been more difficult for me to fit in until I got my diagnosis recently. To be an adult and get tested is so expensive if you can even find someone who will administer it, and videos like this can be life changing. My 12 yr old daughter is ASD and we've known for a few years and we're going through your whole catalog. Thank you
weird eye-contact thing for me: I can look people in the eyes just fine, they just cant look back or I become stressed. relating to people is also a big one for me. one of my friends has DID, and I never noticed that they act differently at different times until they told me that they have DID.
1. Repetitive behavior 2. Issues with eye contact 3. Nonverbal 4. Delayed speech 5. Obsessive interests 6. Lack of social skills 7. Difficulty relating to other people 8. Social anxiety 9. Bad exucation function 10. Poor communication skills
Tip for anyone who has issues looking people in the eyes and want to work on it, focus really hard on the bridge of their nose or just below the eyes. It's still a little hard but its not as bad as direct eye contact. Then when you see the person look away, you look away for like 2 secs start checking to see if they look back
thanks bro i have a little brother and he acts unusual so today i decided to look into it more, turns out he has most of these symptoms but not completely thank god.
2 of my children who are exactly how i was there age have both been diagnosed with autism and adhd. i'm on ssi bc i couldnt hold a job bc of lack of social skills. for some reason most females (teachers, baby sitters, schoolmates, bosses) no matter how nice and helpful i would try to be. they still could never stand me. and led to me being bullied by females my entire life. and i am a female. some jobs that either had too much going on or not enough to keep me on task. almost every job i was let go from was always by females. normally it is the males who always hired me not female employers. also used to have my own little escape i would go to in my head whenever i was uncomfortable or upset. an entirely different world. i guess u could call it my own little happy place. unfortunately there was medication i was put on back in 2006 that made that end. i was homeless for 8 years b4 i finally got some assistance and help getting an apartment. i too do have trouble making eye contact with people. im awkward around people. i tend to hide or wander off. i have trouble approaching people. they have to come up to me bc i wont go to them. i do not like hugs or being touched. unfortunately i am just now speaking up to people about it, so they would stop doing it. i use to just let people do it even though deep down it would traumatize me(i would literally shutter and everything would go stiff and the nerved stomach) i would just go to pieces and it always take a sec for me bounce back from it. . apparently i cant hav people in my space. i also have an issue with being in tight closed up spaces. i am so very glad there are you tube videos of people like you reaching out to us. i dont know if that is what my problem is or adhd. i just know i feel comfortable seeing people who seem a lot like me.
Hello Dan, firstly my very grateful thanks for your videos, what a help! I am sure my grandson (now 5) has ASD (not Aspergers). I have taught children with specific educational needs and recognised it early on. When he was 3 he was seen by a paediatrician who decided he was not autistic, despite many signs and severely delayed speech. He started school in September and it has now got to the point where his many meltdowns mean he can no longer attend (the decision of the school). My daughter is now awaiting a further diagnosis so that he can at least be afforded some education. I have recommended your videos to her and must reiterate what I said in the beginning: thank you so very much for helping her, me, and many others I’m sure, to understand the world of an autistic person.
My obsessive subject is naval history. I have social problems, absolutely zero verbal filter and zero social skills lol. All i can remember as a child is confusion, fear and being overwhelmed constantly. They said i was bipolar but im not surely because the things im telling you guys, i have never told a doctor.
I always thought i was, ive always been that “shy” kid my entire life, and ive always had trouble with eye contact. i always prefer to be alone, except in public i always need to be with someone i know.
Recently I have been talking to this person, who assured , but still not diagnosed with autism, and so we were talking like for a whole day, and to our surprise we found out so many similarities in our lives, and as we spoke further, more and more I did understand that actually, I am autistic. For the whole life I thought that I might have OCD or sociofobia, or other things, but something was off, because those patterns missed some essential parts. And now, watching this video, bit by bit I finally understand what my life was before this moment.
I think I may need to see a professional. I’m 19 and very self-aware about the fact that I am socially inept, I cannot maintain eye contact in important or casual situations, I have so many special interests but I don’t normally talk about probably half of them because I don’t think anyone else can relate(I normally just spout random facts without context and my family hates it), I cannot relate my own experiences to literally anyone else’s, I have terrible diagnosed general anxiety, I don’t get social cues, I speak in a way that I think can sometimes sound rude and I get the feeling that I offended people a lot(no one ever says that but I do sometimes regret phrasing things the way that I do) I can’t do things how others do them(completion of tasks in a certain way) and i cannot for the life of me communicate the way that everyone expects me to(my family can’t understand a word that I say sometimes, especially when I’m upset). I can’t have certain fabric touching certain parts of my body(textures can freak me out when they sit somewhere on my body for too long), i have no organization skills, i don’t like that my room gets messy but I do not have the skills to keep it clean for longer than a week. I have skin picking habits that have ruined my skin but they are a nervous response to having to interact with people and or doing something in a way that I don’t understand how to do it. I still don’t really know because my family and teachers have never noticed any of these things about me, not even the fact that I have one of them most specific daily routines I’ve ever witnessed in a person, or that I have angry emotional meltdowns every other day over mundane things because I don’t know how else to deal with them. I’ve voiced my concerns about it and my parents quite literally brushed it off and chocked it up to my general anxiety disorder, but I’m at university now so I think I need to take this on and finally figure out what’s up with me. Any tips would be appreciated, I’m really trying hard not to self diagnose but I’m almost certain that I’m on the spectrum and I’m not sure if a university counselling system is designed to diagnose things like autism spectrum disorders.
I genuinely thought something was wrong with me, having no filter, not making eye contact, being too loud or too quiet, but I’m most likey just autistic, I will be getting a diagnosis because of this video.
I had a work colleague that was obsessed by Paul Weller. He admitted he thought he was on the autism spectrum but had never been medically assessed for it. He would drive his family nuts by constantly changing channel on the TV and tapping his feet all the time. It took me years of working with him to get used to his constant wandering away as soon as you started a conversation with him. He was also obsessed with horse racing. I tested him once by asking him to name every Grand National winner since the 1960’s. He had no problem at all. His ability to retain info was amazing ! To be honest though I would get infuriated at times because he couldn’t hold eye contact. His lack of social skills was a pain and I had to keep reminding myself that he couldn’t help the way that he was.
Yup, I'm all of these. What sucks about it too is that everyone I've ever known takes it the wrong way and thinks I'm just rude, arrogant or just a downright horrible person altogether. I'm okay with it though.🙂
I often just randomly in the middle of conversation will turn my entire body away from someone and spin back around and I can barely make conversation while looking people in the eyes.
As someone who knows and has worked with a number of people who are on the autism spectrum, learning about this is interesting. One of my friends who is autistic meets almost all of these traits, which is probably part of why I was not surprised when he was diagnosed
I dont have bad executive functions.. because that is a BIG thing that my ADHD covers up.. I am a cook by Trade.. so cooking cleaning organizing and moving things around and placing things in an orderly fashion is my strong suit.. but responsibilities like paying bills on time.. remembering appointments and being prepared ahead of time is where I fail miserably because I don't have a passion for that.. but my ADHD covers up the rest lol
for me its mostly 1,2,4,5,6,7,8,9,10 at most because i cant think and talk at the same time 100% i rarely go out because home is a safe haven and i cant social though if im on the computer in voice chat its fine because im not looking at someone and they cant see me anxiety leaving the house to drive either to night tafe or mainly alone to the shops and cant set foot out because ill have a breakdown function for me i can only remember 1-3 simple tasks. if you do long talks with how to do something ill only remember the first few words and its gone, specially when you try so hard to pay attention to the details and end up forgetting instantly
I live with gran and now she's getting older I'm trying my best to learn how help the right way need but have never been able too look after myself properly so it's really overwhelming to do it all at once when she used to my phone now I have to try to do for example
😂 when I go to my mom's she tells me how to cook. Or what ingredients to use, but not the order or tools. I say "I get what you're saying but what is the order in which you would do the tasks and what is everything you use" as I have slower processing and executive dysfunction
I like having my cab pick me up at 7am every day I take a cab to work. If they're late I get worried. I have social interaction problems. I've never had a lot friends my entire life.
Finding Out I’m Autistic Is Liberating, But Caused So Many Mixed Emotions.... I Cried To Be Honest This Is Just Too Much To Take In. What A Great Year To Start Finding Out This About Myself, All My Life I Never Knew This Until Now At 24 Years Old.
I have been wondering since last spring if I am on the spectrum. This journey is a longer story but essentially a friend made a passing comment in jest. As I started researching ASD and taking tests (online) I watched a video and "the penny dropped." I cried so hard I was shaking and could not ride my bike home. While I have struggled with social skills and relating to others my whole life the other symptoms in this video seem far less prominent. Several months in and I feel like an imposter. I am less sure than I was before but I can't let it go. I have taken the same tests and watched the same videos over and over again to convince myself. I am not sure what to do next.
Respect your intuition. It sounds like you are on the spectrum. Now it is your responsibility on your journey to learn what helps you cope with the world around you. Not easy for anyone and more of a challenge for those of us on the spectrum. Including high functioning professionals and parents. Take care.
1. check, I do not like to do things out of my comfort zone like new foods I take to lunch and it stresses me out and I do indeed enjoy routines but it feels hard to keep them because of ADHD but I do repetitive actions without knowing and this video helped me figure that out. 2. Check 3. (I do not remember information on how i communicated when I was young) 4. Check if you count thinking about what you’re about to say a lot of the time like in groups or even to a friend or family member. 5. Check I don’t think I had a SPECIFIC interest other than something like Sonic the hedgehog but again I have ADHD and they are similar but different, I haven’t gotten over Sonic the hedgehog and I most likely never will because I love it, but I also loved so many other video games and stuff and can always go in depth with them because I just have a ton of love for them. 6. Check This happens with me a lot for people I do not know or if I have a new friend in my friend group, again maybe because I have ADHD and I’m trying to keep calm and not burst into their conversations or something like that. 7. Check but also no? This one confuses me a lot on what to say for it, a lot of people with ADHD tend to empathize and sympathize a lot more with people which is very easy for me but there are some things I just don’t get! Some of it is controversial (LGBTQ stuff even though I am gay) and it just confuses me on how I should try to understand it, like if I’m talking to someone and then they say something I have no interest in at all it just goes in my mind that I will just try my hardest to listen, I always think it’s cool but it doesn’t interest me at all to be honest (majority of the time unless it’s something I’ve had interest in) this is also affected by my ADHD because a lot of people with ADHD are normally curious. 8.MAJOR CHECK, ADHD affected but YES I do have social anxiety like with people I don’t know at all but if they come to me with a positive mood or something and with a higher voice and I can TELL they’re happy I can be happy with them because I LOVE MAKING FRIENDS SO MUCH but also I get so anxious when there’s a lot of people I don’t know at all and I just want to go home. 9. I’m going to say no because of my ADHD and yes I can extremely relate to it and I cannot remember these hints because of my focusing on something else and how I just zone out and gets hard to keep in my head. 10. Check. This happens to me often, not TOO much and as someone with ADHD, when someone says something to me I get mixed signals of what I’m supposed to interpret because it just leaves me extremely confused and I want to ask but I’m so nervous about it That’s a lot of checks but again ADHD and Autism are similar so I highly doubt I have autism but I am not rejecting it as a possibility, I am a 14 year old black male just trying to figure himself out more and answer these questions in my head.
I have a problem talking in group situations because often times I find myself in groups of people I've never met. So if they're having a conversation that doesn't pertain to me or anything I know. Like personal stories. I don't involve myself. Because it's insensitive or kind of rude in a way to just butt into a conversation you know nothing about
this video helped me a lot with identifying my son's issues when it comes to figuring out whether we think it's autism or not, he's in speech and that sort of thing but he's majorly behind in speech and development which we've been getting therapy for but it doesn't seem to be helping much so i think it's not just a speech issue i believe he's on the spectrum.. his occupational therapist gave me a sensory type assessment to take about him and she's coming next week to talk to me about it and give me her opinion but she did tell me on the phone that there's a lot of sensory issues going on based on the answers i provided. i already knew some things about autism but the more i learn the more i believe that's what it is. he'll be 3 in a few months and he's way behind, i'm gonna get him evaluated just to make sure but i honestly already know that it's autism. he has all the signs not just 1 or 2 signs so it's obvious to me. thank you for this video it will help so many people out there that are confused or who just simply wanna be more educated when it comes to autism.
My current special interest is Rainbow Six Seige .. playing a lot, watching lots of vids, trying different operators .. but as I solo queu, it’s really hard for me to have to speak with strangers on the teams. Still good fun though.
I used to not be able to look at people in the face, but I could talk to them, but I forced myself to look at people, and then I practiced looking at people while I talked to them, and I trained myself to be able to make eye contact, and listen while I talk with people.
This is so awesome! About speaking; I didn't start to talk late, but I could write pretty advanced things at 4 y/o, but never talk like that. I also was late in standing and walking, but when I started to walk, I didn't stumble. It seems I did things only when I had mastered them.
I have a cleaning routine. I like the routine because I like my house to be clean. Occasionally my husband will do one of my chores. It bothers me. I should love it, but I don't. Thanks for explaining. I used to make eye contact a lot. I stopped doing it because people complained. I'm really into serial killers... understanding them, etc. I got fired for saying something offensive at work. I hadn't said what they thought but it was construed as offensive. I'm done.
Great watch thank you and well explained, I'm in the 40's and getting assesed in the next month for Autism and ADHD and majority of all those you mentioned i have. If i do have it it'll explain so many things and it's crazy that's it's gone on for so long in my life to finally get asssed.
Great video but can I ask why you use the background music in your videos, as it can make it almost impossible for some of us on the spectrum to focus 100% on what you are saying.
Empathy is mirror neurons. I feel their pain more powerfully. Like being in their brains shoes. Its internalised and shared. Sympathy is understanding they are upset and you can comfort but it's not shared. Normies get it confused.
Great video! (and on point!)...it's as if your video was all about me. (Autism, Aspergers, Obsessive-compulsive disorder, PTSD, Anxiety disorder, BiPolar, and dyslexia).
Incidentally, cos this might help someone, a connective tissue disorder called Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome is somehow associated with Autism. There is a definite statistical link between the two. So, some Autties watching this may benefit from reading about EDS. I do too much eye contact. I have to break it. I have read that this is not necessarily uncommon, but it still is missing from many lists. My language skills were also advanced for my age - reading, writing, learning 3 languages at the age of 5.
the eye contact thing is super hard and weird for me. I think I shift between looking down or in other places in the room, sometimes I get eye contact with the person and then I can perhaps have eye contact for too long lmao. Hard stuff..,
Hello 👋🏻 I'm Wyatt and I'm an transgender man 🏳️⚧️ and I tink I'm autistic, I have literally everything you said , but the opposite to speech delay , my family says that I learned to say words at only 6 months old as baby 🍼 , and I was speaking like and adult ( but more neutral , like in a monotony tone like(?? At only 2 years old ) at 3 years old I learned how to express emotions with words and started to mask , and I remember since I was 2-3 years old almost all my memories... I'm weird bro...
Autism traits can run in families - doesn't mean one has autism; it may mean you've picked a lot up from learned behaviour (saying, "We are the company we keep") copying and mimicking what you see from an early age.
The thing is i can make eye contact the problem is it’s super intimidating and it will shift away really quickly or I’ll just feel uncomfortable. Many times i’m just looking at the person’s eye makeup. It looks like i’m making eye contact and listen but i don’t do neither. I just either “judge” an awful makeup look or if i like it i’m analyzing how to do it on myself. Like my English teacher thinks i listen so passionately her lectures when in reality i’m just looking at her poorly done brows
That's actually pretty hilarious lol. I also fond at times that when someone's talking I tend to scan them over and analyze things physically about them. It's not always to bad of an instinct, especially on the street when you run into garbage and have to scan for weaponry
I usually go for th nose. Brows are good too, really anything Clos the eyes. Sometimes I bounce from mouth, to help me understand what they are saying to nose to mimic eye contact.
@@lauriemrdjan i actually do some eye contact to scan ppl but after a while i’m moving it
Me too
Lol that joke though 😂
I actually am quite good at household tasks, probably because I prefer routines, and it's reinforcing my ability to adult. Doing a load of washing is more important to me than socialising, and far less stressful.
I am, too. But I also was raised by a mother who suffered OCD. Nature vs Nurture, yo.
I'm rather untidy and can be around my own mess. However that's more due to routine than anything else.
I prefer to do tasks on set days at or about a set time, than do it spontaneously. The anxiety of doing things spontaneous is worse than being untidy.
Literally when it comes to self care I have less of a problem keeping myself clean and looking presentable. Its the actual important stuff like eating and using the bathroom and stepping outside that I cant seem to remember
Well I agree😊😊😊
@@davidvarley1812 I feel ya. As a swede I got boendestöd 😊
1) repetitive Behavior
2) Avoid eye contact
3) non verbal
4) delayed speech
5) obsessive interest
6) Social awkwardness
7) difficulty relating to people
8) Social anxiety
9) Bad objective function
10) Poor communication skills
Thank you so much for this list Amar. This means so much to all of us viewing this comment. Have a great rest of your life, you'll do great:)
What the f*ck 😱
I'm not autistic bruuuuuuuuuh 🙄
I'm just an introvert but there is many things in this list matching with me 😶
@montage gamer are you sure about that?
Thanks for taking the time to create this list for other people :)
Why are you watching this video then? 🤨
As a kid I had no problem talking in front of a whole church full of people but had difficulties speaking in front of small groups. A dozen people staring at me presenting a school project nearly made me pass out from anxiety. I think the reason was that I didn't have to look at anyone when there were a lot of people, it was just a crowd of faces I could easily forget were even there.
I completely forgot I used to be in a church choir when I was little. That was scary but not as scary as school presentations oh my god
I had no idea that I was going to have anxiety talking in front of a classroom. I had no problem talking in the class, so, when I gave a speech in my speech class, I wasn't worried. Until I got up to do it.....
Questioning at the moment and I totally feel this. I can perform in front of a lot of people because it feels impersonal and I’m just doing a thing but the moment that gets stripped back and I have to navigate medium sized groups or multiple groups I get completely lost. Either saying nothing or failing to shut up because something happened to trigger my “will not shut up about this topic” part of me.
My entire life I’ve always been wondering why I can’t relate or connect easily with people and I’ve suffered highly because of it, but learning about my autism is helping me so much in accepting this
yeah, same, for a while I thought I was a sociopath because I learned about that before I knew of autism.
I have not only autism, but ADHD as well
im like 99% sure i have undiagnosed autism, and as a result of that my childhood has been hurtful and traumatic. i understand exactly where youre coming from
I totally understand, I have struggled with the same thing my entire life and just could not understand the the issue.
I got 9/10 on this video💯💯💯💯💯🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
As a female, I wonder if one of the differences between genders might be how we experience empathy. I definitely suffer from empathy Hulked out. That said, I don’t often react the way people expect me to, when they speak to me. The feelings are there. I just don’t react how they expect. Dunno🤷🏻♀️
We do have empathy - too much - and because we find ourselves getting caught in the emotions of others (no breaking mechanism frontal lobe cortex leading from sad to depressed to suicidal ideation) switch off in self-preservation. So we're labelled "on empathy by-pass". Usually we have high moral standard and sense of justice and will be the first to give (labelled "generous").
My brother (suspect on the spectrum) had a saying, "ONE of us has a problem. It's NOT ME. And what are YOU going to do about it?"
As someone who was afab, I somehow can relate to both gender “specific” symptoms. I don’t have “set” routine type repetitive behaviours but in other areas of my life I participate in other repetitive behaviours, although I can also have super strong empathy sometimes I really don’t, like you, I react differently to what someone would typically expect, so really I’d honestly just say it varies from person to person.
Same. I can sit like a stone thru an entire scary movie but I feel scared on the inside
@@kevinwilcox1835 I do that
Lockdown easing has only worsened my social anxiety 😢
I was recently diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder, and I find your videos much more informative in understanding my diagnosis than the vast majority of influencers. Most influencers treat autism like it's a quirky trait, not a debilitating disorder. In fact, most of their experiences are the complete opposite of what you've experienced. They talk about love and relationships like any neurotypical. In reality, most autistic people have never experienced love or a relationship.
With that eye contact thing, I hate phone calls because I can’t see the non verbal behaviour such as body language
Delayed speech, you forgot advanced speech and reading. Mobility stages, coordination difficulty, I had early speech ability, skipped crawling, high reflex rate, spatial and situational awareness.
Socially I was very shy, unable to initiate and maintain a conversation especially small talk unless it’s about a common interest.I really don’t care about convention and need to really go through the rules mentally, consciously. Slipped through the cracks, I’m 50+ was diagnosed last year.
yes!!! i was hyperlexic and learned to read before i started school.
I learned to read at 4 and had an expansive vocabulary at an early age, but couldn't run or catch correctly until I was a bit older.
I taught myself to read by watching Sesame Street back in ‘69, when I was four. Thanks, Jim Henson!
Yes yes yes! I can relate and I’m also 53.
Situational awareness and spatial skills are related to High IQ.
I’m diagnosed with ASD and one of the things brought up in my diagnosis report about eye contact was not that I avoid it, but that I make TOO MUCH (‘intense’, apparently 🤣) eye contact and I don’t know how to properly regulate it by looking away at appropriate times. I didn’t know this was a thing until the psychologist brought it up!
I do this too!
I have the same issue.
So relatable.
Yep...i've been told many times since early childhood that i scare ppl with my intense eye contact..they feel like i'm looking right into them (i am but not on purpose, & even if i do very little eye contact it happens anyway..their emotions are Screaming so loud it's impossible to block them out)..and i am Not exactly judging them...but they think i am...& to that i wonder to myself..why?...& even if i was, why should they care?....apparently, so i hear, those folks seem to feel guilty about something & believe i'm going to 'blow their cover'...this is..actually..quite disturbing to me as well..
NewsFlash!..NOT my business, ppl..unless..you are Hurting someone/s...are you?
Can't help myself..i am a Champion of the Underdog...& in todays deranged world..that can get one Killed.(kill me, ok, i would consider it a Mercy killing actually)
Maybe..that is what they are sensing from my 'stare'..a Fearless Protector of the innocent & defenseless..idk........so..i actively avoid people as much as is possible.
i am Hermiting More & More lately since the Majority are suffering from something i cannot deal well with. Rabid Hate.
Their Mouthy Obnoxious Meanness craze is on such a Sharp Rise & more contagious than a plague, so, i do Not Want to be around them.
I either agressively stare at people in the eyeballs, or make no contact and look everywhere but your eyes. There is no inbetween 😂. Its either ive been staring into your eyes as im talking and not looking away to the pointbit makes you uncomfortable. Or I look away and never look at your eyes
Yep! This video is a great video to show people before meeting me in-person.
Me too!
Also great to see you're still active on here, I wondered why I haven't seen your videos and I realised it looks like maybe TH-cam unsubscribed me, is this a thing??
Amen!!
I always wondered if you get tired of listening to chocolate rain or if it's kind of like your alarm by now? Genuine question.
Hey it’s the leave Britney alone guy!
As a child I was obsessed with dogs. Then Pokémon came out and then I was obsessed with Pokémon until today at 36 my bedroom is covered in Pikachu and I own a cat, lol.
But in all seriousness, my Pokémon obsession was something I was deeply embarrassed about. But it helped my therapist realize I might have been on the spectrum. Which eventually led to my adult diagnosis and answered a ton of questions about why I was such a “strange” child.
It was animals for me but I’ve never been diagnosed autistic.
I am 37 I always loved Pokemon. 😊😊😊 I was hyped for the games to come put and gifted my old gameboy to my Sister I gpt a new color one so we could play together😊😊😊
I’m 36 as well and say the share what you just said my gf is diagnosed asd but I’m not but she wonders if I’m on the spectrum . I can’t explain my Pokémon obsession as a soon to be 37 year old man
In Canada - but love the idea of you going into schools to teach staff about autism to better understand our students ❤️
I'm a 41yo undiagnosed Aspie. I definitely relate to all this. That executive function you mentioned is my biggest issue I wish I could change. I just get lost easily. Also, I have a very monotone voice and expressionless face. I wish I had a dollar for every time in life some stranger has told me to cheer up. Uh, no, this is my face 24/7. I wish I could be as well spoken and have an inflection in my voice and good facial expressions like you. And as for the eye contact, had a supervisor once yell at me for not keeping eye contact with him. I just can't keep eye contact, nope. Too uncomfortable.
"smile!" ugh I relate very much to your comment.
I couldn't make eye contact until 2 years ago. Then I decided I wanted to make a connection with people, now I make too much eye contact and it freaks people out. I can read people so well through their eyes, I'm not looking at them but into them. Too much intimacy for most to be comfortable with and if someone has bright blue eyes I just get lost in them.
Neurotypicals be like: Look at me when I'm talking to you!
Also neurotypicals: And stop staring at me with them big ol' eyes!
I have to really think about looking people in the eye so doing it means I don’t hear what they’re saying because I’m telling myself to look them in the eye.
Im not non verbal but situational mutism likes to get me at all sorts of random times.
Same for me. I can actually hear them better if I don’t look them in the eye. And if I’m preoccupied with something I don’t hear anyone and I end up not responding to what they say.
I have the same problem, situational mutism can come out of nowhere and appear as shyness or in some cases come across as being "dumb" to other people. I would love to talk but sometimes the words just don't come, it's often made worse with eye contact.
@ValentínF. Most people will just think you are shy, not rude. As a child I got told that I had to look other people in the eye but I just couldn't. I then tried to focus on their nose or mouth and started staring instead (because I obviously didn't know how long I should look at someone) and I guess that was considered rude. Now I just try to look in their direction and I think it is good enough.
My first special interest was tornados, but its also been religion, a specific person, true crime, certain TV shows, space, philosophy
I know this is an old comment, but you sound really cool!
@@gigahorse1475 Agreed!
These are the classics, usually applicable to boys/men who present the classic signs. Women and girls present their autism more often than not in totally different ways, and mask the living daylights out of life. Unfortunately the medical community at large has only a global knowledge of the classical signs but no knowledge of what experts now realise are more subtle or different representations that most women show. Yo samdy sam is a great channel that discusses the differences between the "old" autism stereotypes and how science is figuring out that it is far more complex. Other than that great channel and thank you for your time and effort to making these videos.
I struggle with eye contact. It's gotten slightly better as an adult. As a child, I would pull my hair over my face and stare at the floor. Back in the day we were called "gifted children", because at the time you could not receive an autism diagnosis unless you were totally non-verbal.
ADHD and ASD they sometimes fight each other. For me I have a lack of social skills unless it's very specific settings. I never know what to say, I'm so awkward all the time I kinda tend to just hide in a corner most of the time, eye contact is soo hard...I mentally have to remind myself to look at someone's face every interaction. I'm obsessed with photography and if I want a particular shot I will hyper focus like a mad woman (duck and birds of prey) and with obs ford pickups. I am terrible at tidying. it doesn't compute. I've always felt like the odd man out. Glad to know I'm not the only one
@Mike Allen hey dude why are you commenting this under every comment?
I'm currently on my journey to get diagnosed with ASD. I know I have ADHD. But the more I look into ASD, the more I realize a lot of my daily behaviors fall into the spectrum.
Wow, are you me? Right down to the photography! 💗
Photography is a pretty great interest for those that see all the little details that others just seen to brush past.
This week, a psychologist told me i have suspected autism. There's a two-year waiting list to start the full diagnostic programme. I think they will expedite my application, owing to my age (51), but I'm still expecting it to take months.
why do you want a diagnosis? I am 58 and just found out via the many you tube videos that I have asd. I am still in shock and afraid to tell anyone. not sure a piece of paper is going to make any difference now, managed it badly for all these years thinking i was just shy and gets depression often
@@eyecatcher1509 It's important to me.
Why are you afraid to tell people? Would certain people use it against you?
@gregofthedump unless you want to get drugs, the piece of paper won't help you
@@eyecatcher1509well, not to answer for them but for me, yes for sure. I’m in the same boat, and I am 40. I could tell that just with the ten year difference in my husband and I, that he had a MUCH different impression of autism. You don’t need me to tell you, it comes with a stigma.
I've been all my life told off for my behaviour at school because I wasn't able to speak most of the time even though I could speak to an interrogation and also my dad told off all the time because I speak just when I was at home.
I'm 33 and just last year I realized I'm in the spectrum and I feel finally I don't have to be ashamed for my behaviour and now waiting for a diagnosis who will be takes 3 years.
My whole life I was seen as a weirdo, the silent girl, the girl who has no friends, the freak. For many years I was struggling and wondering what was wrong with me, why I wasn't more like people of my age during childhood, adolescence and now starting my adulthood
For the last few months thanks to a series I noticed some traits I share with a character, since then I started wondering about if I am autistic but undiagnosed this whole time.
I've been searching and watching lots of videos and channels here on TH-cam about the autistic spectrum from autistic people and doctors and I feel understood and probably also I may have ADHD, now I found this video and I actually feel I finally found the answer, also I'm going to find a specialist to give me a diagnose, thank you so much for this video.
Hi. How is it going with the diagnosis? ... it's not a quick process is it! 🙂
It happens and I felt the same way. I first thought I had social anxiety then the therapist brought up ASD. Though out our sessions I now realize that he was assessing me and I completed some questionnaire of some kind. I was diagnosed and my dad was spooked. I thought about ADHD but he said that I didn’t present enough for that. It’s a long process , it took my more than a month so it’s pretty long
same here, not sure about how to get a diagnosis in the uk tho
What character if I can ask?
I can't thank you enough, for one existing!! But for two!! Sharing all of this information!! I am waiting to get diagnosed bc I just keep watching people on the autism spectrum and keep finding new words or even short descriptions about what I experience! Love it!
I have: 1. Yes. 2. Yes. 3. No. 4. No. 5. Yes. 6. Yes. 7. Not sure. Some situations but excellent in others. I'm hyper sensitive to other's mood. 8. Yes. 9. Yes. Hugely. 10. No.
I'm 52 but have complained to Doctors for year that "something isn't right" but they can't see it. They tested me for Autism ten years ago, just a small questionnaire, but it came back negative. I'm doing another now for Aspergers.
That’s nice. But also, just FYI, “Aspergers” isn’t a diagnosis anymore. It’s just “Autism Spectrum Disorder” (or ASD). You won’t have a test for Aspergers.
I have most of these signs! I haven't been diagnosed yet, but I definitely feel like I have ASD, thx so much for this 😁
Ok, listen, E V E R Y B O D Y has these symptoms from time to time
@@d609n Yes people can have these traits from “time to time” but the fact that it is only a “time to time” thing means it likely doesn’t effect them as an individual as much. This is for people that face this EVERYDAY throughout their ENTIRE LIFE which makes life considerably MORE difficult to manage without the proper support. So yes a lot of people deal with these issues.. but when you are autistic it isn’t from “time to time” it is ALL the time.
Watching your videos really gives me hope. My son was just diagnosed with autism 2 on the spectrum.. I’m learning so much and realizing how amazing and unique you guys are. I am so happy to find your channel. Thank you, this gives me hope for the future
I love this video! I’ve been wondering if I’ve had autism for the longest time, and I definitely have some of these symptoms. The eye contact, obsessiveness over a topic, and social anxiety are the key ones. Thanks for this video, it helped a lot!
1. Check. Same detailed routine every morning. Coincidentally with breakfast.
2. Check. Never look at anyone in the eyes.
3. Check. Mutism in childhood, limited verbal interaction now.
4. Check.
5. Check. I learn everything about something I'm interested in.
6. Check.
7. Check.
8. Big check.
9. Check, but get around it with routine.
10. Check. Can communicate better with writing than verbally.
I think I could be on the spectrum.
Here is a fun one: As you get older your sensitivity to noises can increase over time, meaning quieter stuff can get louder
Here is a real fun one as in interesting and not bad: If you have a preference for eyes like colors shapes styles that sooths you or you simply enjoy looking at then when you look someone in the eyes for long enough you start hallucinating their eyes into what you like looking at as your brain is attempting to cause comfort and not overload you as it recognize "I like looking at this and it calms me so let's just apply it". For me i like looking at Black Sclera as in the white of the eyes being black as it just feels more natural so my brain makes it like that so i can stare at it for hours meaning "proper" eye contact as stare too long and the other person freaks out that you are staring at them. I never said it was perfect, but it works
This just came to me but I’ve noticed that I’m obviously horrible at small talk (HATE IT SO MUCH) but what’s funny is because I can’t do small talk I will end up talking about really deep topics RIGHT AWAY which makes people uncomfortable. Or ill talk about something I’m obsessing over at the moment and people will be confused.
Same here. Small talk is pointless, imo.
Cringing because I do this
Reading this I just laughed, if for no other reason than it is painfully familiar. I am just crap at small talk
I thought I was one of those people who experienced face blindness, but come to find out I just don’t spend enough time looking at faces to make memory imprint. Lol
Holy shit, is this relatable.
Me too.. I don't look at people's faces..
I can't believe it keeps showing ABA therapy commercials in autism videos. Those goons scarred me for life. We're not broken! And we definitely don't need our legs cut off for no worse than a scrape or bruise.
That said thanks for doing this video Dan. I have trouble with eye contact and understanding people too.
I notice that I can be fine in groups of large people, as long as I don't need to interact with them, like at an amusement park. However, the moment I need to socially interact with a group of any size I simply cannot, and it gets worse the larger the group is.
Issues with eye contact was something my mom noticed when I was a baby. She said that she knew I was different was from the first moment she saw me- but not in a bad way. But one time one of my mom’s friends tried to talk to me and of course I looked away. And this lady goes, “She’s a little brat isn’t she?” And if my mom hadn’t been holding me, she would punched this woman.
As far as obsession goes, my parents always told me not to become obsessed with whatever I was liking at the time. I had to learn to curb it as much as I could, which meant I couldn’t talk about what I wanted to talk about. For example, tv shows and movies were and are how I relate to the world, to people, to myself, so they are very meaningful for me. So, if I find a movie or show that’s important to me, I want to talk about it. In middle school, I was bullied pretty bad. I actually don’t remember much of those 3 years but I remember how I felt. And it was the shows and movies that helped me through it. It was Star Wars the original trilogy, and Star Trek:TNG, then Stargate Sg-1 which is still my absolute favorite show, and I just wanted to share my thoughts and things that happened in them because I was trying to explain a part myself and I love stories. I had been writing stories since I learned how to write. And even before then I made picture books. I still write to this day.
Google Dave Pilkey
I mean you’re a grown up now but his story might inspire you 🙏🏻
Wish you the best of luck
@@elviraskitchen thank you so much. I was officially diagnosed with ASD a week ago and it’s been a lot to process. It recolored my entire past.
Wow. I- wow. I can strongly relate to the movies/shows and writing one. As a preschool kid I was an early reader. As a school kid, I would read TONES of books, loved movies and shows. They just, idk, made sense. Like you can actually tell what the character is going through and why they're going through it, unlike in the real world, where you only get pieces of information. Like suddenly this person is unpleasant to you, but you kinda have to assume that maybe they're having a bad day because something happened prior to your meeting and it's not your fault.
As a school kid, I would participate in those spelling competitions, where a teacher would read you a text and you had to write it down and they'd look for misspellings. In the third grade, I scored first in the "spelling, math, general nature knowledge" third grader competition in my 60-thousand-inhabitants town. The spelling one can obviously be attributed to the tones of books I read. I also score high in the IQ tests (according to the official test by Mensa I took part in when I was 15ish, I'm among 1% most intelligent people in the world, lmao, another reason for school kids to hate me, should they ever find out) and I would usually score at least first in school in the international Mathematical Kangaroo competition, which is a lot about pattern recognition and noticing certain logical traps etc.
If there's one thing I would consider my special interest, something that's been with me since early childhood, it's stories and storytelling. And I too need to talk to people about it. Having moved a lot, including to another country, and having only ever known how to "make" "friends" (in practice 1-2 close people) in school setting, I ended up only having friends I met online a few years ago in a language exchange group (another big interest of mine is linguistics, especially grammar, like how different languages work). They are usually the "victims" of me venting about shows etc., alongside sometimes my mom and most frequently, YT comment sections because that's one of the places where people actually wanna read it and often start such conversations, lol. Especially those music videos about a show or a certain character or group.
I remember finding some note while cleaning up my room that said "I will have written a book by my 13th birthday". Well, didn't quite work out :D. But I am developing a story of my own and I do hope to finish and publish it one day. Storytelling is just how I see and understand the world. Like I know it is gonna sound super insensitive, and I acknowledge the absolute devastating tragedy that it was, but to me WWII is mostly just a source of amazing stories. Shows and movies that were made based on it, stories that actual survivors share etc. Especially coming from Poland, which during that period of time had, to my knowledge, the biggest underground army and even an entire underground state, with underground government, entire justice system, universities, schools etc. etc.
I feel like through the hundreds, if not thousands of stories I have consumed over my 24 years of life, in a way I understand people better than they do understand themselves, if that makes sense. Doesn't help me an inch in socializing though, lmfao.
BTW Just noticed your comment about how you were diagnosed a week ago (now 3ish weeks, I guess). Congrats on having the courage to seek diagnosis :)! I read and heard stories saying the process can be really rough, especially if you meet the wrong person. I should probably talk to my mom in more details about the traits and such from when I was a child, because honestly, probably because of my partially traumatic child, I forgot most things about my childhood, lol. Problem is, she doesn't speak English so I can't exactly send her one of these videos, I should probably look up some Polish ones. And autism has become another special interest of mine, I guess :D and for some reason I usually don't wanna show on the outside that I obsess over things.
Thanks for coming to my TEDTalk, lol, but it's usual for me to write an entire chapter in a comment. Talk about a kid who read too much in her life.
@@Kasiarzynka 100% agree with everything you said- except spelling and math are my worst subjects (turns out I have dyscalculia, a learning disability. So I can completely understand a math concept but I can’t do an equation without a calculator).
I also started studying people when I was in kindergarten, so psychology and behavior is another interest of mine. Anthony Hopkins did the same as a kid!
@@cjradenbaugh as to psychology, I even was considering becoming a psychologist, partially because I wanted to study it because I felt like it'd help in my writing, partially because it felt like I was pretty good at mediating, at least in like school kids setup.
It's just that I don't side up with anyone and kinda spectate it from outside, and I honestly do that to this day with pretty much every "controversial" topic. If there's only one person, I can kinda assume the role supporting the idea opposite to that person's. Say if they're pro death penalty (which I feel very meh about, like I can see the pros and cons but don't really have an opinion, nor do I feel competent enough to have one), I will argument against it, and if they're against it, I'll argument for it. I think it has something to do with the conviction that we can only expand our horizons on such matters by having a civilized discussion.
I can also work the other way around and assume the same position as the person if I don't feel comfortable opposing them. I have this uncle who's very "people who support other parties are idiots". I showed him a photo of in-school parliament simulation where his party scored one of the lowest (they won that election countrywide btw). He said "you better don't show your political sympathies then". He was convinced I supported them (they're my least favorite party btw) just because when the topic showed up I would subconsciously bring up their points I agreed with.
I'm a human chameleon, lmao.
In high school the social cues I had the most trouble understanding others feelings main reason why it was hard for me to maintain relationships as I got older (currently 31) I'm able to empathize a bit more, and also have better control with the eye contact I still have trouble multitasking and getting used to change in routines at times, and the anxiety I get whenever I'm around crowds of people.
I have always had problems with eye contact. It just feels too intimate unless I’m really close to someone and even then I still need frequent breaks. 😮
I'm an aspie and I get along fine with autistic people most of the time
i should have been diagnosed with autism when i was very young. but the doctor thought my parents were trying to get money from the government so they denied my the diagnosis. so i eventually joined the military and ended up getting medically discharged at 100% disability for schizophrenia. and just recently was diagnosed with autism. i caused a lot of problems in a competitive world of the military. they gave me a rifle with ammo. and told me to shoot a target. almost my entire career in the military i had a failed rifle score.
I feel this but more cos when I got assessed, I didn’t go through the whole process so I didn’t check enough of those stupid boxes cos it wasn’t done thoroughly enough. It was rushed and too focused on the stereotype at the time so I was given the diagnosis of being borderline for Apsergers. I have since experienced doctor’s appointments that feel like they’re avoiding or afraid to diagnose properly; and by the time my mum requested a CAMHS referral due to my obsessive behaviour at the time, I’d had my meltdowns treated as Anger Management issues by my school and had most of my other traits badically ignored or overlooked. It’s only now I’ve struggled with a spike in my ADHD traits in Uni that I’m seeking a private assessment and diagnosis for both ASD and ADHD (I got the package deal), a decision I made before finding out the atrocious waiting time I’d suffer from with the NHS.
I also have adhd and the thing with routines and repetitive behaviour is that i do have some repetitive behaviour(like needing to listen to music everytime i get ready if i don’t listen to music i don’t get ready or needing a bottle of water next to my bed or else i don’t sleep or needing a specific order for my workouts) but like my adhd ass makes it impossible to stick to too many routines or to not like some variety. And obsessive interests now that’s definitely my most “out there” autistic trait. When i was 6 my mom says i was so obsessed with Daisy duck that i wanted to be a duck and was making all the damn time duck noises and was tellin everyone my name is daisy.Now are animals(mostly cats) pop culture(music mostly but love reality tv and celeb gossip more than i should too) fashion and makeup and game of thrones Like i’m usually so quiet at school unless my classmates bring up about Kardashians Kanye West or Beyonce then i somehow won’t shut my mouth. My best friend hasn’t even watched game of thrones yet and she doesn’t want to bcuz i already told her everything that happened since i watched it once rewatch Short clips on Instagram and TH-cam and now planning to rewatch it fully again
I had a relationship with a girl and I found a lot of similarities in her with my brother who is already have asperger diagnosis. She just struggling in social situations and a lot more specific autistic thing, like she was frustrated even going out in the garden basicly she was calm at home and watching tv, she wasnt able fall in sleep without tv going in the backround, and mostly she want to some disney movie (26y old) So we already lived together at her parents. She stopped her studies multiple times and start a new one last 2 years just 5 times because she wasnt be able communicate alone, misunderstood people and always think people hate her or disrespect her. And the naivity, lack of emphaty, ton of weird routin and lot more… I tried to introduce her but she aint accept it… Her parents help her out mostly in everything. We just break up and now I watching your channel and I want to learn more and more about the topic. But it’s sad there are a lot of people misunderstood for a life and have difficulties in simple things just like to go in the grocery. I want to say thank you for your activity on youtube a lot more people need to be informed.
The most misunderstood personalities types are INFJ INTJ and also INFP INTP, I think all intuitives types are misunderstood by the sensing types.
(MBTI, 16 personalities types, 16 way of functioning, 16 way of thinking) Learning the 8 cognitives function and typology like the MBTI for example helped me a lot to understand a lot of things in life, amazing knowledge (cf "Frank James" channel for example)
I don’t know why but I feel very strong empathy even though I have autism
you can have a strong empathy, I do too, but even though I feel and understand let's say when someone is upset, I don't know how to properly respond, because when I am upset I do not like to be touched but many people want a hug or pat on the back. I don't mean you don't care and have empathy for them, its the communication to that person letting them know you empathize with them.
I’m really glad I found these videos because for over 20 years I’ve been trying to hard to figure out what about my life was so different and why I behave so differently from my peers. This is the first time I’ve heard anyone with the same line of disorders as myself, but i as well have OCD ADHD dyslexia and Asperger’s, and have had the hardest time figuring out that I’m on the spectrum. Ive always had non verbal episodes that would span into days or tip toe through the house and squeal. My partner always finds the squeals amusing and cute but honestly it feels like I’m performing in a spiral most times lol
These videos have really helped me to understand a lot that I haven’t. Thank you for taking the time to inform people and also help inform ourselves
Thank You So Much For This Info! I will get on my son on why he kept watching the same thing over and over all the time... I feel Horrible for that, and now I understand.. but I'm heartbroken for getting after him al the time😭😭😭 I Love My Boy
Out of these 10 i relate to 4/10 and these include 1st one Repetitive behaviour, 2nd one is Eye contact issues, 3rd one is number 5 obseesive interests and the last one I relate to is number 7 which is difficulty relating to people so thanks for the video
My friend who is a psychiatrist told me at a party 2 weeks ago that I have A.S.D, I was taken back a bit by this diagnosis because I always thought I perhaps had ADHD, but more of an ADD which is more of an inattentive subtype that doesn't experience hyperactivity. I felt so small in that moment, like I was a totally different person to others and that if people could tell I was on the spectrum or if they were told that I was on the spectrum that they would treat me as a little bit special. Even though my mate is a psychiatrist I still haven't got an official diagnosis, so maybe I don't but whether I like to admit it or not I do have a lot of trouble making eye contact because it feels a bit overwhelming, looking at someone in the eye, although of course I can do it if I have to. Furthermore, admittedly I have difficulties with flow of conversations, like taking turns and speaking too loud. Although, I feel that there are so many symptoms that I don't have that made me laugh taking an online test because many symptoms seemed absolutely ridiculous to suggest that I exhibit these. However, that is why it is called a spectrum and many symptoms would not be present in different people with autism, especially high functioning autism which is what I would have. I am 29 years old and live independently out of home, hold a job, have a degree and am in the final year of my second degree. I also have friends and even though I struggle with it a bit I can get laid and have had girlfriends in the past (this is a great relief as that would suck been too autistic to not get laid). Sorry if this was information overload, might be another sign of autism but this is why we are here!
Lol! I'm so glad you can get laid also 😆
I've got a statistical question. How often, to people on the spectrum, end up dating other people, on the spectrum, without open knowledge of the other person's autism?? Bloody hell!! That's a long drawn out sentence. Lol. I gravitate to certain people, without knowing. I just feel comfortable with them. Because I don't feel like running away. But, yeah, would be interesting to find out. Thank you!! Be safe and well 🌞🌻🌞
Till I was an adult, it was horses. All day, everyday.
Up until a couple of years ago, it was plants/ gardening.
I also have short lived interests/ obsessions (days-weeks).
Thank you for this, I'm 41 and didn't find out why life had been more difficult for me to fit in until I got my diagnosis recently. To be an adult and get tested is so expensive if you can even find someone who will administer it, and videos like this can be life changing. My 12 yr old daughter is ASD and we've known for a few years and we're going through your whole catalog. Thank you
So happy I found your channel! Look forward to learning more. Have a good day young man!
weird eye-contact thing for me: I can look people in the eyes just fine, they just cant look back or I become stressed.
relating to people is also a big one for me. one of my friends has DID, and I never noticed that they act differently at different times until they told me that they have DID.
1. Repetitive behavior
2. Issues with eye contact
3. Nonverbal
4. Delayed speech
5. Obsessive interests
6. Lack of social skills
7. Difficulty relating to other people
8. Social anxiety
9. Bad exucation function
10. Poor communication skills
Thank you!
@@pinkerton1698 no problem
Tip for anyone who has issues looking people in the eyes and want to work on it, focus really hard on the bridge of their nose or just below the eyes. It's still a little hard but its not as bad as direct eye contact. Then when you see the person look away, you look away for like 2 secs start checking to see if they look back
thanks bro i have a little brother and he acts unusual so today i decided to look into it more, turns out he has most of these symptoms but not completely thank god.
2 of my children who are exactly how i was there age have both been diagnosed with autism and adhd. i'm on ssi bc i couldnt hold a job bc of lack of social skills. for some reason most females (teachers, baby sitters, schoolmates, bosses) no matter how nice and helpful i would try to be. they still could never stand me. and led to me being bullied by females my entire life. and i am a female. some jobs that either had too much going on or not enough to keep me on task. almost every job i was let go from was always by females. normally it is the males who always hired me not female employers. also used to have my own little escape i would go to in my head whenever i was uncomfortable or upset. an entirely different world. i guess u could call it my own little happy place. unfortunately there was medication i was put on back in 2006 that made that end. i was homeless for 8 years b4 i finally got some assistance and help getting an apartment. i too do have trouble making eye contact with people. im awkward around people. i tend to hide or wander off. i have trouble approaching people. they have to come up to me bc i wont go to them. i do not like hugs or being touched. unfortunately i am just now speaking up to people about it, so they would stop doing it. i use to just let people do it even though deep down it would traumatize me(i would literally shutter and everything would go stiff and the nerved stomach) i would just go to pieces and it always take a sec for me bounce back from it. . apparently i cant hav people in my space. i also have an issue with being in tight closed up spaces. i am so very glad there are you tube videos of people like you reaching out to us. i dont know if that is what my problem is or adhd. i just know i feel comfortable seeing people who seem a lot like me.
Hello Dan, firstly my very grateful thanks for your videos, what a help! I am sure my grandson (now 5) has ASD (not Aspergers). I have taught children with specific educational needs and recognised it early on. When he was 3 he was seen by a paediatrician who decided he was not autistic, despite many signs and severely delayed speech. He started school in September and it has now got to the point where his many meltdowns mean he can no longer attend (the decision of the school). My daughter is now awaiting a further diagnosis so that he can at least be afforded some education. I have recommended your videos to her and must reiterate what I said in the beginning: thank you so very much for helping her, me, and many others I’m sure, to understand the world of an autistic person.
My obsessive subject is naval history. I have social problems, absolutely zero verbal filter and zero social skills lol. All i can remember as a child is confusion, fear and being overwhelmed constantly. They said i was bipolar but im not surely because the things im telling you guys, i have never told a doctor.
You should. But you sound cool
to find out i have all of these symptoms is just wow
I always thought i was, ive always been that “shy” kid my entire life, and ive always had trouble with eye contact. i always prefer to be alone, except in public i always need to be with someone i know.
This made me realize how my social anxiety made me not care about anyone anymore pretty sure from the age of 7 was when it started
Recently I have been talking to this person, who assured , but still not diagnosed with autism, and so we were talking like for a whole day, and to our surprise we found out so many similarities in our lives, and as we spoke further, more and more I did understand that actually, I am autistic. For the whole life I thought that I might have OCD or sociofobia, or other things, but something was off, because those patterns missed some essential parts. And now, watching this video, bit by bit I finally understand what my life was before this moment.
I think I may need to see a professional. I’m 19 and very self-aware about the fact that I am socially inept, I cannot maintain eye contact in important or casual situations, I have so many special interests but I don’t normally talk about probably half of them because I don’t think anyone else can relate(I normally just spout random facts without context and my family hates it), I cannot relate my own experiences to literally anyone else’s, I have terrible diagnosed general anxiety, I don’t get social cues, I speak in a way that I think can sometimes sound rude and I get the feeling that I offended people a lot(no one ever says that but I do sometimes regret phrasing things the way that I do) I can’t do things how others do them(completion of tasks in a certain way) and i cannot for the life of me communicate the way that everyone expects me to(my family can’t understand a word that I say sometimes, especially when I’m upset). I can’t have certain fabric touching certain parts of my body(textures can freak me out when they sit somewhere on my body for too long), i have no organization skills, i don’t like that my room gets messy but I do not have the skills to keep it clean for longer than a week. I have skin picking habits that have ruined my skin but they are a nervous response to having to interact with people and or doing something in a way that I don’t understand how to do it. I still don’t really know because my family and teachers have never noticed any of these things about me, not even the fact that I have one of them most specific daily routines I’ve ever witnessed in a person, or that I have angry emotional meltdowns every other day over mundane things because I don’t know how else to deal with them. I’ve voiced my concerns about it and my parents quite literally brushed it off and chocked it up to my general anxiety disorder, but I’m at university now so I think I need to take this on and finally figure out what’s up with me. Any tips would be appreciated, I’m really trying hard not to self diagnose but I’m almost certain that I’m on the spectrum and I’m not sure if a university counselling system is designed to diagnose things like autism spectrum disorders.
I genuinely thought something was wrong with me, having no filter, not making eye contact, being too loud or too quiet, but I’m most likey just autistic, I will be getting a diagnosis because of this video.
I had a work colleague that was obsessed by Paul Weller. He admitted he thought he was on the autism spectrum but had never been medically assessed for it. He would drive his family nuts by constantly changing channel on the TV and tapping his feet all the time. It took me years of working with him to get used to his constant wandering away as soon as you started a conversation with him. He was also obsessed with horse racing. I tested him once by asking him to name every Grand National winner since the 1960’s. He had no problem at all. His ability to retain info was amazing ! To be honest though I would get infuriated at times because he couldn’t hold eye contact. His lack of social skills was a pain and I had to keep reminding myself that he couldn’t help the way that he was.
Yup, I'm all of these. What sucks about it too is that everyone I've ever known takes it the wrong way and thinks I'm just rude, arrogant or just a downright horrible person altogether. I'm okay with it though.🙂
I often just randomly in the middle of conversation will turn my entire body away from someone and spin back around and I can barely make conversation while looking people in the eyes.
As someone who knows and has worked with a number of people who are on the autism spectrum, learning about this is interesting. One of my friends who is autistic meets almost all of these traits, which is probably part of why I was not surprised when he was diagnosed
I dont have bad executive functions.. because that is a BIG thing that my ADHD covers up.. I am a cook by Trade.. so cooking cleaning organizing and moving things around and placing things in an orderly fashion is my strong suit.. but responsibilities like paying bills on time.. remembering appointments and being prepared ahead of time is where I fail miserably because I don't have a passion for that.. but my ADHD covers up the rest lol
for me its mostly 1,2,4,5,6,7,8,9,10
at most because i cant think and talk at the same time
100% i rarely go out because home is a safe haven and i cant social though if im on the computer in voice chat its fine because im not looking at someone and they cant see me
anxiety leaving the house to drive either to night tafe or mainly alone to the shops and cant set foot out because ill have a breakdown
function for me i can only remember 1-3 simple tasks. if you do long talks with how to do something ill only remember the first few words and its gone, specially when you try so hard to pay attention to the details and end up forgetting instantly
I live with gran and now she's getting older I'm trying my best to learn how help the right way need but have never been able too look after myself properly so it's really overwhelming to do it all at once when she used to my phone now I have to try to do for example
😂 when I go to my mom's she tells me how to cook. Or what ingredients to use, but not the order or tools. I say "I get what you're saying but what is the order in which you would do the tasks and what is everything you use" as I have slower processing and executive dysfunction
I like having my cab pick me up at 7am every day I take a cab to work. If they're late I get worried. I have social interaction problems. I've never had a lot friends my entire life.
What about not feeling confident and thinking everyone else is bigger than you or whatever they say is right.
I’m almost 29 and I always just thought I was really shy but this makes more sense
I'm 32 and just within the last 6 months I've realized I'm definitely on the spectrum and it makes my life a lot easier to understand for myself
Finding Out I’m Autistic Is Liberating, But Caused So Many Mixed Emotions.... I Cried To Be Honest This Is Just Too Much To Take In. What A Great Year To Start Finding Out This About Myself, All My Life I Never Knew This Until Now At 24 Years Old.
I have been wondering since last spring if I am on the spectrum. This journey is a longer story but essentially a friend made a passing comment in jest. As I started researching ASD and taking tests (online) I watched a video and "the penny dropped." I cried so hard I was shaking and could not ride my bike home. While I have struggled with social skills and relating to others my whole life the other symptoms in this video seem far less prominent. Several months in and I feel like an imposter. I am less sure than I was before but I can't let it go. I have taken the same tests and watched the same videos over and over again to convince myself. I am not sure what to do next.
Respect your intuition. It sounds like you are on the spectrum. Now it is your responsibility on your journey to learn what helps you cope with the world around you. Not easy for anyone and more of a challenge for those of us on the spectrum. Including high functioning professionals and parents. Take care.
1. check, I do not like to do things out of my comfort zone like new foods I take to lunch and it stresses me out and I do indeed enjoy routines but it feels hard to keep them because of ADHD but I do repetitive actions without knowing and this video helped me figure that out.
2. Check
3. (I do not remember information on how i communicated when I was young)
4. Check if you count thinking about what you’re about to say a lot of the time like in groups or even to a friend or family member.
5. Check I don’t think I had a SPECIFIC interest other than something like Sonic the hedgehog but again I have ADHD and they are similar but different, I haven’t gotten over Sonic the hedgehog and I most likely never will because I love it, but I also loved so many other video games and stuff and can always go in depth with them because I just have a ton of love for them.
6. Check This happens with me a lot for people I do not know or if I have a new friend in my friend group, again maybe because I have ADHD and I’m trying to keep calm and not burst into their conversations or something like that.
7. Check but also no? This one confuses me a lot on what to say for it, a lot of people with ADHD tend to empathize and sympathize a lot more with people which is very easy for me but there are some things I just don’t get! Some of it is controversial (LGBTQ stuff even though I am gay) and it just confuses me on how I should try to understand it, like if I’m talking to someone and then they say something I have no interest in at all it just goes in my mind that I will just try my hardest to listen, I always think it’s cool but it doesn’t interest me at all to be honest (majority of the time unless it’s something I’ve had interest in) this is also affected by my ADHD because a lot of people with ADHD are normally curious.
8.MAJOR CHECK, ADHD affected but YES I do have social anxiety like with people I don’t know at all but if they come to me with a positive mood or something and with a higher voice and I can TELL they’re happy I can be happy with them because I LOVE MAKING FRIENDS SO MUCH but also I get so anxious when there’s a lot of people I don’t know at all and I just want to go home.
9. I’m going to say no because of my ADHD and yes I can extremely relate to it and I cannot remember these hints because of my focusing on something else and how I just zone out and gets hard to keep in my head.
10. Check. This happens to me often, not TOO much and as someone with ADHD, when someone says something to me I get mixed signals of what I’m supposed to interpret because it just leaves me extremely confused and I want to ask but I’m so nervous about it
That’s a lot of checks but again ADHD and Autism are similar so I highly doubt I have autism but I am not rejecting it as a possibility, I am a 14 year old black male just trying to figure himself out more and answer these questions in my head.
I have a problem talking in group situations because often times I find myself in groups of people I've never met. So if they're having a conversation that doesn't pertain to me or anything I know. Like personal stories. I don't involve myself. Because it's insensitive or kind of rude in a way to just butt into a conversation you know nothing about
this video helped me a lot with identifying my son's issues when it comes to figuring out whether we think it's autism or not, he's in speech and that sort of thing but he's majorly behind in speech and development which we've been getting therapy for but it doesn't seem to be helping much so i think it's not just a speech issue i believe he's on the spectrum.. his occupational therapist gave me a sensory type assessment to take about him and she's coming next week to talk to me about it and give me her opinion but she did tell me on the phone that there's a lot of sensory issues going on based on the answers i provided. i already knew some things about autism but the more i learn the more i believe that's what it is. he'll be 3 in a few months and he's way behind, i'm gonna get him evaluated just to make sure but i honestly already know that it's autism. he has all the signs not just 1 or 2 signs so it's obvious to me. thank you for this video it will help so many people out there that are confused or who just simply wanna be more educated when it comes to autism.
My current special interest is Rainbow Six Seige .. playing a lot, watching lots of vids, trying different operators .. but as I solo queu, it’s really hard for me to have to speak with strangers on the teams.
Still good fun though.
Thank you for explaining all the things I can’t put into words for people when I’m trying to describe what Asperger’s is like.
I used to not be able to look at people in the face, but I could talk to them, but I forced myself to look at people, and then I practiced looking at people while I talked to them, and I trained myself to be able to make eye contact, and listen while I talk with people.
This is so awesome!
About speaking; I didn't start to talk late, but I could write pretty advanced things at 4 y/o, but never talk like that.
I also was late in standing and walking, but when I started to walk, I didn't stumble.
It seems I did things only when I had mastered them.
I have a cleaning routine. I like the routine because I like my house to be clean. Occasionally my husband will do one of my chores. It bothers me. I should love it, but I don't. Thanks for explaining. I used to make eye contact a lot. I stopped doing it because people complained. I'm really into serial killers... understanding them, etc. I got fired for saying something offensive at work. I hadn't said what they thought but it was construed as offensive. I'm done.
I have been diagnosed with autism, so I came here to see if I have any of the symptoms
Great watch thank you and well explained, I'm in the 40's and getting assesed in the next month for Autism and ADHD and majority of all those you mentioned i have. If i do have it it'll explain so many things and it's crazy that's it's gone on for so long in my life to finally get asssed.
Great video but can I ask why you use the background music in your videos, as it can make it almost impossible for some of us on the spectrum to focus 100% on what you are saying.
The fact that i have 4 of these scares me
Empathy is mirror neurons. I feel their pain more powerfully. Like being in their brains shoes. Its internalised and shared. Sympathy is understanding they are upset and you can comfort but it's not shared. Normies get it confused.
Great video! (and on point!)...it's as if your video was all about me. (Autism, Aspergers, Obsessive-compulsive disorder, PTSD, Anxiety disorder, BiPolar, and dyslexia).
Incidentally, cos this might help someone, a connective tissue disorder called Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome is somehow associated with Autism. There is a definite statistical link between the two. So, some Autties watching this may benefit from reading about EDS.
I do too much eye contact. I have to break it. I have read that this is not necessarily uncommon, but it still is missing from many lists.
My language skills were also advanced for my age - reading, writing, learning 3 languages at the age of 5.
the eye contact thing is super hard and weird for me. I think I shift between looking down or in other places in the room, sometimes I get eye contact with the person and then I can perhaps have eye contact for too long lmao. Hard stuff..,
Hello 👋🏻 I'm Wyatt and I'm an transgender man 🏳️⚧️ and I tink I'm autistic, I have literally everything you said , but the opposite to speech delay , my family says that I learned to say words at only 6 months old as baby 🍼 , and I was speaking like and adult ( but more neutral , like in a monotony tone like(?? At only 2 years old ) at 3 years old I learned how to express emotions with words and started to mask , and I remember since I was 2-3 years old almost all my memories... I'm weird bro...
im 67 and awaiting an autism assessment i saw an interview with gary numan and i r recognize the same symptoms in my self
Autism traits can run in families - doesn't mean one has autism; it may mean you've picked a lot up from learned behaviour (saying, "We are the company we keep") copying and mimicking what you see from an early age.
I look at the bridge of a person’s nose, which is in between the eyes. Doing this make people think that I’m looking at their eyes.
I've noticed that when I've tried giving eye contact,alot of people would avoid eye contact with me. I can't understand why
This video is gold for me, thank you
My dad told me once that I took longer than other kids to speak, but when I did it was complete and complex sentences.
You obviously understood a lot even when you were non verbal.