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Oddity Archive: Episode 133 - As Seen On TV! (Mail-Order & Infomercial-Style Commercials)
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infomercials for products which are not only useless and silly but also hopelessly dated; this is truly my shit, thanks Ben
A Daniel Johnston reference.... in MY Oddity Archive?????
I didn't even have to order anything
That home harmonica course guaranteed that in a few weeks, you'll not only suck, you'll also blow.
Disco Body Shaper. Because we need to sell Sit 'N' Spins to adults.
"There's a lot of us 'used to be's' around." Yes, and that's why you're now in an infomercial!
watching this made me think of other infomercials I saw back in the 80s and it made me wonder why having a multi-tool that could scale fish seemed to be such a big deal in so many of them
According to Google Maps, the place where Ginsu was headquartered is now a preschool...
As of 2017 Ginsu Knives are still manufactured and sold. The Quikut and Ginsu brands have both been manufactured in Walnut Ridge, Arkansas,
since the merging of the Douglas (vacuum cleaners) and Quikut (knives)
companies in 1964. Douglas Quikut also manufactures ReadiVac and
American Angler brands.
In 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014, and 2015 Consumer Reports reviewed the Ginsu Chikara knife set in their comparison of fifty knife sets and rated it as their "Best Buy".
I have that set of Ginsu knives in my kitchen right now. They are still just as sharp. Just like a tuna can lid would be...
Lol.
So happy you put in those Hawaii ads from the KMGT Magic Movie Marathon.
Great episode, as usual, and glad I could provide the Cigarrest commercial!
"Together, We can make Smoking DISSAPEAR".
My mother used Cigarrest to stop smoking. It worked. :-)
Thank you for the Daniel Johnston joke!
This is a great episode!
A mini collection of Archive Riffs linked together by Ben learning how to make money by taking the piss..I mean learning to sell a catheter.
Really enjoyed watching this. :)
Man I love the music of your intro, about the only intro I never skip.
I'm the complete opposite personally, I always skip the intro.
*blasts Pavanned at full volume*
I loved the intros with Senses Working Overtime, but maybe just because the song is super catchy
What is the cowboy guy who looks like he’s on drugs and reaching for a beautiful woman? (The intro)
It appears to be either the same woman, or a different woman dressed as a dirty mane.. Thats about as far as I got.
I tried one of the 800 numbers out of curiosity. The Veg-O-Matic number (15:18) now leads to a Caribbean cruise (I'm assuming) scam
No adult hotlines? Bummer.
SnakeHugz Official that's what most expired 8xx numbers end up leading to
if not that, then phone sex scams
The Ginsu knife number leads to a dead line.
I bet the Cigarrest number now leads to a psychic hotline and the Grapefruit number leads to a sex line.
The ginsu knife is the same as the magic TV knife? I'm going to send a check to that address and COD it so I can send it back just keeping the magic TV knife as a gift to see if its just the ginsu! "Sorry no COD" Damn. "Rush delivery available!" Sweet! I wonder where those things were made? Not china but rather mexico? Romania? The democratic people's republic of the republic of the Congo? 1978? That 50 year warranty is almost up but the only guarantee is that address will be closed down by the FTC or SEC or IRS in about 3 years. Why not make it a hundred year guarantee or better: A LIFETIME guarantee without the possibility of getting your money back!
I found one of those disco body shaper in the street
That 'big note' songbook is the musical equivalent of trying to speak English to a non-English speaker very slowly because you think that speaking slower will magically make them understand.
Buddy Cole: “I still refuse to believe that Liberace was gay. I just don’t want him to.”
The announcer from the Grapefruit ad sounds exactly like the guy from the Santo Gold infomercial.
"Santo Gold!WE GOT GOLD BABY!We GOT GOLD!"
Now that you mention it, indeed the Annoucer does sound like the same one from the 1985 Santo Gold Infomercial.
The harmonica is called a mouth organ? Phrasing?
This is a long time coming, I've been waiting for "as seen on TV" ever since I saw the local commercials episode
In the 70s and early 80s, the commercial channel on UK television (ITV) used to be awash with KTel and Ronco adverts at Christmas time.
From this side of the pond, you have my deepest condolences. 🇺🇸
K-Tel had that DJ guy doing the voice overs, but the Ronco stuff has Ron Popiel himself doing the honors! Talk about staying within a budget!
KTEL now does the Canadian ripoff kids also known as worse kidz bop also known as the minipops.
the Archive is the last place I expected to hear a furry fan joke, lol.
I was watching this and saw this comment and thought to myself, where does he say anything about that, seconds later, it hits.
I live right around the corner from the former Ginsu corporate office!
One of my favorite ads like this was for the Rolling Ruler. Had two myself. I was never able to do much of what it was said to be able to do. But it wasn't bad as a basic ruler.
This is the first time I've ever seen a chrome piano. I guess everything IS chrome in the future!
LOL pre-historic slap chop!!! the veg-o-matic!!!
also i had a set of the ginsu steak knives from a thrift store. and MAAN they where a damn good set of steak knives!
I love how commercials for slicer/choppers always mention chopping onions “without a single tear!”
It's said that Liberace didn't like a rose on the piano, he prefers putting tulips on the organ.
I don't remember him playing an organ in public. I only ever saw him on the piano.
fjvideo Oh no. He only played the organ in private.
Rick K. That's a good one
HI-YO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You don’t have to be happy to be gay.
Why do I have this hunch that if TH-cam existed back then, you'd review all of these.
Even the swimsuit
I found out in 1996 that the address you sent your check/money order to was an address owned by, or the actual studio address of the channel broadcasting the ad. My girlfriend and I were up in Alpena, MI when I was watching the local CBS affiliate on TV and it was full of these ads, and in each one it said to send it to an address right there in Alpena (in fact, just down the street from our hotel). Interested in one item, I got in the car to drive to said address...to find out it was the actual TV studio. lol
Likewise there was a PO Box in Atlanta that appeared in MANY of these ads, especially on cable. The mailbox was across the street from one of the stations where many of the ads were filmed. The station had a side business doing fulfilment. These are historic buildings in my opinion. The TV station is now a church and the Post Office is about to be torn down. It's sad. But nobody remembers the history these days.
@LatitudeSky I recollectedly realized a few of the addresses I had seen from time to time in my youth on these cable channels. I still recall the one for anything advertised on CBN; PO Box 1155, Norfolk VA 23501. (They also used an address in Virginia Beach once as well.) And yes (W)TBS used an address in Atlanta, naturally. USA used the number 1-800-USA-1000, but I don't remember the address(es) they used.
Why did announcers describing products in the 60's sound like they were issuing orders to evacuate the city?
It was the '70s and BOOMING VOICES always get respect.
I kinda like the voices though.
Just to wake people up that fell asleep watching TV and piss them off..
Does it have to sound so grandiose????
Your little comments during the infomercials crack me up! Keep it up!
Hearing Ben utter the words "furry cosplay" makes me realize how little I desire to live anymore.
My pharmacy downtown had an AS SEEN ON TV section, they've gone uptown on you.
I've always said there's a reason that these things are "Seen on TV" - if you saw them in a store, you'd never buy them!
Not really. The Big City Slider Station and Flex Seal I have both used and both work very well.
A lot of stores now have "As Seen on TV" sections, there's even a store with that name in some malls that only sell that stuff.
7:38 Come on dude, that Herb Alpert and the Tijuana Brass album is the best one in your collection, just listen to that!
I had a Record Vacuum. It didn’t work.
Whoever thought that up was a genius. Just build a device that spins the record and sounds like a vacuum. It is just a placebo effect anyway.
It sucked. Or rather, didn't suck.
@@siyahamba2080 noice. The comment, not that yours sucked. Sorry for that. My deepest sympathies 😔.
who whats Ben too be the next MST3K Host.
I do. 😇😇😇😇😇😇😇😇😇
It's amazing how many "as seen on TV" products actually work as advertised! Some of them are incredibly stupid, but one's like the Popeil Oven or the Mr. Microphone really gave a lot of cooking and entertainment for the money. And yes one guilty pleasure I indulge with my kids is the Magic Tracks, they are actually fun and fairly well built.
I got a Mr. Microphone at Kmart once in 1984, but I think it was in the clearance area. Thing didn't work, so we returned it.
Just imagine the wealth of infomercial content that'll be ripe for this same treatment in a few years. There's a few digital sub-channels now that only show infomercials 24/7!
The people in Chicago, Illinois really love these old classic commercials. I miss them dearly. 😊😊😊😊😊😊😊
I've been waiting for this one forever. Thanks.
I asked if the harmonica book could teach "Take me Home, Country Roads", then the piano book actually had it.
"Wh-whoa-whoawhoa.. wait, what is this, a Ben's Junk Episode?"
Well, if the next Ben's Junk episode isn't for the Disco Body Shaper I'll be disappointed.
You will be disappointed. I have yet to find one.
you can reply to comments now??????? or am i still stuck in 2015
You're stuck in 2013-to-early 2017. I finally got my privileges back in late April/early May.
oh lol
Welcome back, then. Heheh
Does the harmonica come with the John Popper neck holder?
7:13 - The addition of the sound effect had me on the floor!
Aww, I was hoping for an appearance by Billy Mays! Oh well, still a great video. :) I'm too young to remember these specific ads, but I do remember in my teens staying up late on the weekends to watch infomercials ("Set it and forget it!").
Oh boy... Harvey Keitel with his merch again...
Darn, I wanted to hear more about the battery powered catheter.
I still have my Magnetic Window Cleaner, and it works very well - but it's a UK version with the two halves connected by a cord, thus avoiding the sort of disaster you foresaw, Ben. Was the US one manufactured by a psychopath or a sadist, do you think?
Ginsu is the perfect example of "a broken clock is right twice a day". Except it's a knife, not a clock. And it's not broken.
6:50 I'm honestly surprised at that Joke, but knowing what's going on in Colorado lately, it was gonna happen sooner or later.
I didn't realize how often they used Hawaii for addresses, nowadays it seems like it's New York.
I believe that was a Hawaii TV station that played the ad. When I was a kid, these commercials would often have as the address “(Name of station), PO Box XXX, City, State, ZIP.”
@@smittykins yup. I didn't fully realize you were sending your payment to an address owned by, or the actual address of, the TV station until I was in Alpena, MI in 1996, and their local CBS affiliate (part of the third smallest TV market in America, BTW) was inundated with these ads, and they all said to send payment to an address just down the street from my hotel. Interested in one item, I thought, "Why not just go down to the place and pick one up?" So I did, and found out the address WAS the TV studio. lol I assume they get the payment, then send it off to the actual company, getting a kickback for each one or something.
Thank you for showing the love to the late great Steve Goodman.
18:01 The tracking is fighting the VCR to the death in this ad.
21:53 Recorded off a black and white TV.
My god I own that record vacuum! I wouldn't fancy using it though :o
I remember seeing so many of these around Christmas and saying "makes a great gift" and I would wonder who would buy these things for Christmas? probably for people who had no idea what to buy.
3:10 "...one when you blow, and one when you suck. If you follow the instructions in this booklet, you'll be sure to suck."
I am seriously wondering what the deal is with the "recycle old clothing" caption in the commercial at 10:23. It doesn't match the style of any of the other text in the ad, and that font genuinely looks like it came straight out of an Apple II. Did they forget to originally add it and only realize it in post-production or something?
damn why didn't they include the Liberace commercial in the Liberace movie, what a missed opportunity
I had a harmonica when I was a kid, and as an adult, I find it as the most annoying instrument ever created.
That there Vegematic by Steve Goodman, that's a damn catchy tune.
Thanks, Ben, that's been stuck in my head for half a decade.
What a prime opportunity for some geek research into KMGT-TV, thanks Ben!
11:32 I knew you were going to make that joke
Ben should have went to school for marketing, then maybe he would have no trouble making a sales pitch.
That really surprised me when that one ad said to send to Kalaheo Av. in Kailua. I’ve lived in Kailua my whole life and Kalaheo is a residential street. Not to mention that I’ve never heard any ad saying to send to Hawaii at all. Weird! 😮
Ugh...Ronco. I remember the knives his "cousin" Arnie promoted. (Because, despite his name being on the company, if those blades didn't work right, Ron would NOT be held responsible, damn it.) You (and anyone reading this) should be able to find the exact one I'm referring to on here somewhere.
Bundy87Fan I remember that ad. I actually love the ad for how cheesy it is. However, reading some reviews online, the knives don't seem to be up-to-snuff.
I've had a Ronco knife set for almost 20 years now, they work great. You have to know how to cook to know how to use a knife properly. Just like you have to know how to hold a hammer when you swing it, same with knives.
I was just watching that one yesterday. After watching that one and a Miracle Blade one, I prefer Tony's Miracle Blade ones by far. They weren't nearly as cheesy an ad, and Tony just seemed way more personable and less serious than Arnie and Ron did.
This was nice! Thanks. I enjoy these types of episodes!
It really sounds like the voiceover for the Chef's Magic is Bob Dorough of Schoolhouse Rock fame
Sunup Sundown swimwear still has an online presence. weird.
I wonder if it was the inspiration for the Borat mankini?
@@FluteboyDear God, NO!! 🤮
I saw Electric Catheter open for Marilyn Manson in 1998.
I saw the Electric Prunes open for the Electric Catheter, in 1966.....
@@ITILII That was some really good stuff you had.
Back in the day, I knew a band called catheter. The guitarists brother is disabled hence the inspiration
“Falco is intrigued.” Love it!
miss lewinsky's parents were watching tv one day, and both her and clinton were on screen. her mother said "ooh ,look it's our monica!" which is of course another name for a mouth organ
4:28 I WAS SOOOO YOUNG BUT I REMEMBER THAT LIKE IT WAS YESTERDAY!!!! STILL HAVE THE SONG BOOK!!!
Stupid catheter sucked my bladder (along with some other stuff) right into the bag! What are these new dangly bits? Am I still a girl? Help please! Is there an 800 number for this?
Please!!! I'm afraid to hit the reverse switch.
I swear to you I just looked up that K-Tel Knitter on flea-bay. I cannot figure out knitting or crochet for the life of me. My mother, grand mother, and great-grandmother is/was amazing crocheters. Fly through rows without even looking down. My great-grandmother did those teeny tiny doilies. I am sadly lacking this ability. I hope maybe this gadget will help me make weird things for people they can pretend to like at various holidays/celebrations.
Awesome video! I live in Canada and I've noticed that we've started using a new emergency broadcast system called alert ready, have u seen it?
I swear they used the same damn voice actor for every as seen on tv ad for like 20 years (14:37)
rAAdish roses, LOL. Good commercial picks. More please! Also... Can you upload this 'chef's magic' commercial in raw form so that parodies can be made?
wdavem both of the Hawaii ads from the episode are on this video from Archive Annex: th-cam.com/video/vmJ4LgyFAWE/w-d-xo.html
The voiceover for the chefs knives commercial is longtime radio talkshow host Barry Farber.
Love these videos - thank you!
The money back guarantee address in Warwick is now a child care facility next to a Dunkin.
Oh, lord... This is definitely one of the best videos you've made that I've seen so far. (16:50 ~ 17:09)
I can’t be the only one who thinks the narrator for the Chef Magic commercial is just a wee bit creepy
Sponsored by Fuzzymemories.tv! Without which this episode would not of been made possible.
Nope, Ben just stole the videos from them, which were not even theirs to begin with.
So funny and I like it and I didn't know bout old US TV ads
False advertising! When I heard new and improved, I thought something had improved - better box, better host. Nope. No improvements.
Nobody has to tell that harmonica commercial guy when to blow. He blows throughout the commercial.
6:50 Yup, now you're a potentional loving fur target. Gotta get yiffy.
Fuck Google Edgy
o w o
mehgeme My dude. Ow
Bigbeater Din 🎵 _Awwww, yeaaaah, you're gonna get yiffy in here..._ 🎵
So is the "cigaresst" is just a book and tape? No patch or drugs included? Thats not going to work. I would never by that unless they threw in free crystal earings1!!
Ah, the Ginsu knife...I think we might still have one or two "Ginsu 2000" knives from the early 90s laying around.
I only just started watching your channel yesterday and thought that you sounded a lot like Daniel Johnston, so I found your chord organ joke funny
Falco is intrigued!
Jesus, that Daniel Johnston reference. Thank you. May he rest in peace.
I remember the record vacuum. Lol
Not sure the Record Selector wouldn't cause more issues.
Yeah, it did. Someone gave me an old one which I used for a while until I noticed it was chewing away at the bottom of the record jacket every time you stuck it in the slot or pulled it out.
can I do squeegee hands and jazz hands at the same time? or do I need to consult a physician first. and do I need to do some stretching first.
12:25 - 13:59 That's a voice that can sell anything!