8.5 years sober. Regret the day I had my first drink. 20 years wasted and the damage is done. At least I stopped before the twins were born - that's what I'm most proud of, not being a drunk dad. Alcohol is not our friend.
+Nautilus1972 Good for you. I drank so much in 2002 and 2003, that it damaged my brain and left me with memory problems. Alcohol id a poisonous substance and should not be promoted as anything other. A few pints at the weekend and a special occasion is fine, but there are so many people who are now in trouble with the stuff. Best of luck.
Nautilus1972 Well done you. You should be proud of yourself. I'm 5.6 years at the moment. It's not easy. It has taken a lot away from me yet through the steady grilling recovery I gained much more in the long run. Working at sobriety is an achievement in itself. We can get knocked down but we have the strength to get back up is the main thing.
Wonderful!! You should be proud I also stopped before my son was born I've been sober twenty years and like you I'm glad my son has a sober mom. Enjoy your life and your an inspiration to others.
This documentary is powerful. I was touched on so many levels. I'm a recovering alcoholic of two alcoholic parents. My 17 yr old son had a drunk mom for almost 10 years. My parents were drunk until I was almost 30. We've all since found help none of us drink anymore. I worry about my son though. Thank you for being so brave and making this film, Calum.
melipstik stains congrats on your soberly may I wish you true love for the future.. maybe u should talk to your son about your emotions as far as what you were going threw give him the answers he deserves even if you are hurt physically it will make your son give you even more respect... you are very lucky to get over this and make a better life for your son after all it's NEVER too late I'm proud of you and I wish my own mother gave me the gift you gave your son I wish you the best of luck sweetie
melipstik stains Yes, but marijuana is illegal, (In my state) while alcohol is legal, advertised on TV, YT etc... BTW, I'm at 22 months sober this time (11 years sober before my lengthy relapse) and I was diagnosed with cirrhosis for my one year anniversary. ;-( But my health & bloodwork & vitals keep getting healthier and healthier, and my youngest child went from an "at risk kid" with barely passing grades to straight A's in/as a part of my sobriety. Both of my daughters had much worse than an absent mother for 9 years. Take it easy, one day at a time & best wishes.
I commend Calum for his journey of discovery, but, in my mind, his mom is the hero in this story. She had no delusions regarding George and turned her back on his fame and fortune for the good of their son. Well done.
He may not have been able to do something like this & work through his own trauma while creating a documentary to help others if she has stayed. She did a great job.
@@aprilapril2 he didn’t have that kind of money for her to hold on to. By the time she left him he was playing in the US for not that much money & you gotta remember he was a raging addict and used all his money to fund his addiction. She probably went and got a high paying job herself or married a wealthy man in LA.
Agree with the college, but the others? Whats wrong with enjoying a good few beers and a pie watching the 6Nations that comes around once a year, like the others ? Its the daily consumption that affects health and lives
I really wish him the very best. I love the way he's trying to think through all these complicated emotions and memories, and how he's willing to share his story to help others. He has a beautiful soul and I'm so glad I watched this.
You can't see past the fact that he knows all the answers but pretends he didn't know what was wrong.he knew. He's doing this because his dad is famous,otherwise his documentary would be a flop. There is plenty of info about alcoholism in the states. He says there's not much education there about it,but I'm not buying it. I know first hand,and it's not rocket science.
My dad was an alcoholic and as a kid i remember how much i wanted the police to stop us when my dad would chuck down two vodka bottles and would drive around with me in the back seat. Kids should never go through stuff like this. I was 11 years old, in the back seat of my dads car, scared to death because my dad was driving like a maniac and i was praying to God to send a police man our way that would randomly stop us and arrest my dad. Never happened! We had to endure the torture of living with him till he drank himself to death. Alcohol is a drug and people need to stop thinking that a couple of beers every evening are perfectly fine and ok. This attitude needs to stop.
My dad is the exact opposite. He works at a rehabilitation center and I've never seen him drink in my 20 years of being alive. I think he's afraid of alcohol. I don't blame him
Beautiful guy, how he let's us watch him as he comes to term with his dad being alcoholic, seeing his struggle and the emotional conflictive feelings growing up with a father who was clearly not there for him during the course of his life. Then again, when I see his mother I can sorta understand why their relationship is so strong.
So much heartbreak and turmoil even writing this. My father was a functioning alcoholic, but the last 8 years everything fell apart and it's a miracle that he's still alive at 64. It's hard to portray how much of a miracle it is, since he always drank until cross-eyed drunk. So much heartache thinking of the past...
My mom became a hardcore alcoholic when I was 5. She died June 26, 2019 - when I was 17 weeks pregnant with her first grandbaby. She also couldn't come to my wedding because she was just so drunk all the time. It's definitely an illness, and I challenge the concept of 'choice': once the addiction takes full hold, the choice to drink or not is gone. However, the need to drink comes from a deep place of shame, usually from childhood trauma. So the person CAN choose to face their pain (with therapy, treatment, possibly medication, other modes of healing). The problem is, facing that pain is so deeply terrifying that they would often rather blow up their lives than face it. I often wonder the same thing as the host: if she loved me, could she stop? What does it say about me as a person that my mom drank so much? Am i allowed to be angry if there is no choice? I feel guilt for feeling angry, too. The worst thing is you can't actually tell your addicted parent the pain they have caused you: they will feel shame and drink more to ease their shame, instead of soothe you and apologize. My mom would apologize but her shame would become so big that she would disappear into the bottle and then I would fear she would die because of me. To all alcoholic parents out there, if you can, ask your kids how your drinking affects them and really listen for the answer. Let your kids let their pain out.
I'm compelled to answer your comments which is not something I do as I myself have 3 teens whom I raise very much on my own. The reason? 7 years ago I stopped drinking. My husband could not understand the new sober wife and left. I was delighted, why? Because 2 parents unhappy in a house do more harm to a child than separated. The healing in recovery needs daily help. The direct open conversations with our children comes first. No one else matters as our kids did not choose to arrive with an alcoholic mum. My kids were 7,9, and 10 when I stopped, still affected even though I was nowhere near rock bottom, still running a successful business, aobly drinking wine at night. My only sister is 26 years sober. My children have also been exposed to a nasty divorce and dry drunk. Almost as bad as active drinking. I attend AA, but I'm not absorbed by the process either, recovery for me is regaining my family, my confidence and my happiness.any mum out there today reading this if you are in that bottle today,if it has become your only friend,remember it will turn on you, it will turn your family and friends to abandon you when it's just too much to handle. Calm best talks ot being abandoned in Old Trafford..on the night of my first daughters communion, I left all the family at home and went to a party. Soon after this I began to listen and still I drank for another 2 years.That is the hold addiction takes. It may be in our DNA. I will forever regret any residual effects,but, being in recovery we have a chance to change the direction of our children's lives. ISNT THAT WORTH IT?
I grew up with alcoholism in my family including my mother, I grew up abused and neglected... now I'm 35, married to a good man but still struggling with issues from my childhood(nightmares, social anxiety, depression, etc) but I did chose to not touch alcohol, I've never even been drunk and I also chose to not have children.. I just feel I'm too damaged and there's no need for me to bring more people into the world. Addiction has deep deep lasting effects so please get help if you're struggling with it.
Well done that you stand by your decision and have thought it through! Don't let anyone tell you that you've made the wrong decision. You've made it, it's to do with your life and your body.
@odin gave his eye to acquire knowledge Shes smart to make a decision to not have children. Alot goes into that decision including finding a suitable person to help raise the child. Today almost every woman I know has had multiple kids from different men. There are blended families. I made lots of mistakes in my life but one I didn't make was bringing a child into the world when I wasn't equipped to cope and deal with life. She's not the problem. A good life means different things to different people. You can have a great life without kids as well. More freedom.
What a strong person he is to have done this and addressed his fears and issues about his life with his alcoholic father. Beautiful documentary. Thank you for sharing this :)
I stopped in 2001 because I promised my son, who was 7 at the time, that I would never drink again - he is now 23 and I love him and his sister more than life itself, their early years are a blur but I would like to think I came back from the edge just in time The sense of shame of my 20 years drunk never leaves me and has kept me sober for 17 years and counting......... For anyone out there who has a drink problem what is more important? Your family or your local barman? If it's the former then get help - never has there been a better time to get the professional support that is needed
Excellent documentary. Callum is an exceptional young man to share openly his pain and desire to help himself as well as others. So terribly sad that alcohol is legal despite the millions upon millions it kills, mains and destroys. I pray he finds his peace and answers to his questions. Well done.
A great doco and very emotionally confrontational with a person who is a son, brother, father, and was a great legend in football, but has a addiction that only the addict can change. RIP George Best. Blessings to his son Callum who has been dealing with his own feelings about his Dad, good luck for your future...
Whoa. Good for Calum Best, such an intelligent, gracious, and thoughtful man. Especially because his father was so well thought of, so beloved by so many. This took some kind of courage.
To be drunk and still play at that level, the guy must be a bona-fide legend in the sporting sense. How could someone function so highly while regularly binging? It seems impossible.
Bravo to Calum and all who made this doc. This is a very important issue to bring out of the shadows and provide an open, safe ,forum for people affected by alcoholism and drug addiction to "let it all out". Thanks so much. Be well. :)
absolutely brave on so many levels, to make peace with himself and father he adored and tried to connect with throughout his life.. i´ve seen so many lives suffer due to addicted loved ones.its such a tough disease to overcome but he addressed it in such a constructive way..such an example boy..George´s best result!
thank you for this. my father was an alcoholic. while he was present in my life every day, he really wasn't and that's because he was always drunk or passed out. he couldn't tell me my favorite color, my best friend's name or what i studied in college. he was a true 100% narcissist along with the addiction so having a relationship with him was i'm possible. he died 3 years ago and i didn't even cry. i wasn't even sad because you can't miss what you never had. if anything i was glad he was gone because it was a huge stress lifted from my life. i've tried my whole life to be better than him and now i'm dealing with my own dependency with prescription pain killers that i have to take because of the sick body my soul occupies. i try so hard not to be like him but unfortunately i seen myself repeating a lot of the same patterns. i don't try to get high, in fact i don't even like being high. i just want to be comfortable and i want to sleep. if i'm asleep than it makes time go faster and i don't have to suffer through the bad emotions. it's a battle everyday for sure!
Ashley Klug the last part of your comment sounds like me when i explain why i drink. After you said "i don't even like being high". I also believe many men are depressed and don't know how to cope with it, so they drink to numb reality and just try to drink to get through life.. then everyone around them suffer... My dad was the same way and now i have become the same, until recently.. now i was to be normal.
jib bo......agree 100 % . I believe mental health issues are controlled by many with alcohol I know i do , i,m alcohol depentdent and drink far to much but im addressing this ......hope your well pal
Alcohol took my Dad's life. he killed himself at age 42. I still struggle on an emotional rollercoaster between pity and hate. I didn't know him sober. He rejected me, he wanted a boy. He started drinking in the Marines. our military is a culture of drunkeness. Shameful.
Linda Nickell move on and forget him, I've done the same in my life no one becomes alcoholic and start abusing their family and close ones by accident, it's a choice they tough they could do it, and if you in anyway blame your self just stop. God bless
From birth to 10 years of age, until my parents divorced, they were both alcoholics. My Mother was also bi-polar. When you are young, you don't know that its not supposed to be that way. You just live in it. Emotional and physical neglect. Being terrified and screaming watching them physically fight with each other and break things. Watching your mother bleeding because her arm went through a window because she was shoved into it. Being sent away to different relatives and not knowing it was because our Mother was in a mental hospital. Being woke up in the middle of the night to run away because dad was gonna shoot us. This was back in the 1960's. Nobody every reported any of these things. There is much more but it would be too long to tell. I can say this, now being 55 years old. That you will never really know or understand why they were like that. Why they couldn't see the profound negative effect they were having on there children. I developed what I know now as anxiety when I was 7. I had a phobia of people (no trust). I carried a lot of anger when I was a teen because I realized that my home life was not how it should have been. I know today that I will always have this hole in my heart for the things I didn't get from my parents, like love, guidance, nurturing etc. All the normal things parents are supposed to give to their children. I went through many years of feeling such anger about it. I cried over it so much. I felt worthless. How could I have any value if my parents didn't even value me. I did therapy, several times, over the years. Talking about it helps, but it cannot, nor will it ever, change it. You can't get it back. Its not our fault, our parents were sick. Even though my dad thought he was a good dad, but he couldn't remember all the bad stuff he did cause he was in a drunk black out. I can say this, about living through that, I never put my own children through that kind of upbringing. For me I feel that God's grace covered me, and let me be the chain breaking of this cycle of addiction, that seems to run in our family. I know I will always feel the lack of not having loving, good, kind parents. But I was able, by God's grace, to be a good parent to my own. I hope you will do your best to live in each day that you have and do your best with it. Its difficult to let go of the bad memories, but just keep pulling yourself into the present moment and live for you, now, and love those whom you love with all your heart. Sorry this got so long. But you are young, and I hope that you don't dwell in the past too long, life is always moving forward. Find your peace in this and every day.
Hey Robin =) I'm sorry that you had this similar upbringing. I hope and pray that you will overcome or come to a place of peace with the past. Just keep living in the day you have, do your best with it. If you ever want to talk with me please feel free to message me. Be blessed and keep moving forward. Hugs.
bbrees I have overcome , but sometimes I cry ,thanks for your offer to chat and I hope that you too are moving forward ,its the most we can do and feel proud and powerful for what we have overcome ..eh..
Crying is a good release. I'm glad that you have overcome. I just take things one day at a time. When I catch myself thinking about things that are painful, I pull myself back to the present. Sometimes its hard because the emotional pain is very overwhelming. Sometimes you just have to hug and comfort yourself. Just keep on going. My best love to you in your life. We are not alone in these battles.
They make him out like he was a saint or something. My god, he was just a regular person with an incredible, god-given talent...and his share of flaws. People need to stop turning sports stars into moral heroes.
Calum, thank you so much for your courage to do this documentary. I too at 41 are still struggling with making sense of an abusive alcoholic father. The guilt gets me so often and I totally relate to commitment issues - I always thought it was just me :-) nope. Im not sure these things in life are something we get "closure on" just my opinion, i think we learn with our wisdom how to mange the pain and chose a different perspective through the eyes of our adult selves instead the lost invalidated invisible child we were so desperately seeking to be seen. Big massive love to you and thank you
My dad was a mean alcoholic. He was a respected homicide detective, so this was our big family secret, but I am pretty sure many others knew. My mom was just mean. I think she was so beaten down. He used to sit her in a chair and begin by shouting at her, and cursing. We 5 kids would sit on the stairs and listen. When he began to get physically violent towards her, as opposed to just breaking things, the oldest would go and try to break it up. We walked on eggshells all the time; anything could set him off. If a child got murdered, he would REALLY be upset, and drink a lot. Yet when we went camping in the summer, he did not drink and could be fun. But we were all too scared of him to have fun with him. I remember my mom telling me when I was about 12 to get in the raft with him in the river. I was 100% positive I was not going to come back alive. We are all adults now, and grandparents. We are all screwed up and some of us don't speak to each other. Some of us suffer from depression. It affects you your entire life. But we all made sure OUR kids had it better. When my husband drinks, I stay away. It grosses me out.
Ive been born and raised in the United States so I had no idea about your father who was obviously a huge soccer (football?) star....Congratulations on stepping up and speaking out about such a silent problem. Powerful documentary. I realized I began to have a problem with drinking and I have quit cold turkey. Amazing thing is I feel great. Some things in life can only be experienced to realize the refreshing and life they bring. Thanks for your honesty and humbleness throughout this great video. I feel like I know you.
I'm glad to have seen this, at random! I spent 6 years in a relationship with an Alcoholic, and my son, from this relationship, who is 5 now, I always wonder just how he will grow up having to put up with his alcoholic father. It's surely not fair! I left that mentally and emotionally tumultuous relationship just over a year ago, and I am glad to have moved apart from all of that chaos, especially for my son's well-being!
What an awesome look into a horrible situation. I hope he continues working on himself, getting that emotion and anger it's time to be dealt with, and goes on to find some resolution. I'm sure his mother would be more than thrilled for him to do so and she definitely did a good job leaving when she did. No telling how badly this would've been if he had the added trauma of seeing it effect his mother longer than he did.
Gia Gi it's destroyed my parents marriage after nearly 35 years of marriage. They're getting divorced soon. My mum just can't do it anymore. I feel sorry for my dad even though he makes me angry
My father is an alcohoolic too but my mother divorced him when I was 6 because he was beating her...I can still remember the fear when he was drunk and I knew what is going to happen. Now I am 26 and very good without him. I am really sorry for you and your parents Domine Wimbury because I can think that after 35 years of marriage your mother have been through alot. @Roberta Janson you don't need to feel bad for saying that you were glad when your father passed away because I had times when I wished mine did it too. We don't choose our parents but sometimes is better without one of them. God bless you, your mother and as well for @Domine Wimbury and her family.
I’m not an alcoholic nor do I even drink but I do struggle with substance abuse problems and people just truly don’t understand how hard it is to quit. How embarrassing it is. How badly you want things to change, but it’s so much harder than people think. That’s what I thought. It’s a struggle and I promise you if people could quit overnight a HUGE percentage of people would.
Very good documentary. Thank you Calum for sharing this with us. You are a very beautiful compassionate soul, loving and sharing and I hope this very difficult childhood and past will find closure very soon. I hope many can learn from your experience.
Sally is to be totally respected. She loved her son enough to stop and he will know that in life about his mum - that she loved him more than the alcoholic. Wonderful woman and what she's doing. The fact she stopped shoed strength and will install strength in her son.
I almost wonder what George Best's professional peers, coaches, etc., would say in terms of their personal experiences dealing with his alcoholism, and if it ever affected him as a player, beyond his obvious triumphs and challenges that made him one of the greatest.
Calum thank you for sharing your private struggles with us❤️ The legacy of your dad leaves through you! Cherish the beautiful moments you shared together and forgive the bitter ones. Its not easy but it’s important to let go.. so you give room for beautiful things to come your way. You are an exceptional son and I’m sure your father loved you with all his heart. Remember the good times, let go of the bad times.❤️❤️ PS: I’ve never been diagnosed as an alcoholic but doing my own research I think I was either on my path to becoming one, or I was what they call a functional alcoholic. I am honestly very tired of the feeling of being drunk. The headaches and sometimes regrets of the night before. I decided to turn my life around and cut off alcohol from my life. It’s simply not enjoyable anymore. So whats the point? This video has been very motivating for me. Makes me feel great about deciding to dump alcohol. Life is so much more that being wasted. Thank you again for sharing your story!
I'm an ex alcoholic, well, I say "ex" but I'll always be an alcoholic ,and I still struggle every day of my life. But I'm 10 years sober now, and I have full custody of my daughter. I'm married to a beautiful lady, and we have 2 more daughters. Praying for anyone with this disease. Xx
My mom would rather drink than feed me when I was an infant If you want to love drugs, so be it. But you cannot be a responsible adult and a druggie.Just don't have kids. There's your answer.
u just said it ur self... be a responsible adult and dont have kids... but alcoholics are not responsible adults, if they where they wouldn't be drinking, never mind the kids part... lol
Right! Don't ever have kids. My brothers and sister messed up their kids' lives with alcohol and stuff, and I decided never to have kids. I never get over traumas.
my husband was an alcoholic. he passed away in 2013 after he committed suicide in rehab. he left me, his son and now he would've been a grandad. the first year was rough. the second year I thought what can I do go help others from going through this..now I teach AA classes to help other people and their families. if I can help one person my husband didn't die in vain. I miss him terribly and I know the alcohol was destroying him from the inside. so I'm trying to make his memory a positive one and I need to let the grandkids know what an amazing man their grandpa was.
Alcohol was the ruin of my family. My mother died from end stage liver disease when I was 30, it was a horrendous, shocking death. I knew she had liver disease and told my parents, but was admonished for being hysterical and scaremongering. Her death happened over a period of 48 hours, it was bloody, brutal and still haunts me, ten years later. Five years after my mum passed away, my father succumbed to his own addiction and died from heart failure on my 35th birthday. I found him in the living room, asleep. His death broke my heart. Five years on, I have a beautiful, two year old son and vow I will never put him through the horror I lived through and am still affected by. Ours was a loving family, ruined by alcohol, which was used as a crutch.
Tara Mulholland Yeah, that really is an ugly, nasty death. Hope you’re well and recovering from their crap. How fortunate your child(ren) are to have a mom who is present and engaged with them. There’s no finer Legacy we can leave our children and grandchildren than the total repudiation of the lifestyle of our “parents” that never were. Take care.
Really brave Calum. You went on a journey a lot of us children of alcoholics think about but don't always have the strength or means to do. My dad is currently battling several cancers exacerbated by his drinking. I know his time is nearing, and I am at a loss for what to do or how to bridge the gap but this documentary really spurred me to take some sort of action. I won't have the chance again.
I know of a little girl she was 4 when she found her daddy dead from the alcohol there is a major problem with alcoholism in this county thanks for highlighting and to Calum for being so strong can't be easy but programs like this help people understand the devastation caused by this disease
Bless him. I know this is an old documentary, but I hope he found his path to making peace. I went through something similar with my mother. It took me years to come to terms with it not being my fault. She took so much out on me, but she was sick....fighting her own demons. I've lived a lifetime with the scars. It made me who I am, and I've always felt like a broken, malfunctioning human being. I suppose we spend too many years thinking it's our fault, but it helps so very much when we realize it isn't. It gave me great love and compassion for my mom and all she endured that made her a broken, sick person. I'll always live with the scars, but I'm so thankful to no longer hate my mom, but pity her. I hope this young man found his way through. And of course so many others dealing with the same hurts and loss.
I wish they would make alcohol illegal. My exhusband was an alcoholic and is now dying from it,and he still drinks.My son is an alcoholic, who is so bad that he gets the shakes if he doesn't drink . I'm watching my son die alittle each day.This is killing me because he is such a good man with a good heart He's been to rehab 3x,but has relapsed. He started drinking heavily when he found my first granddaughter, his neice Lauren,dead at 3 months.I don't want my son to die.Please pray for him.
QueenBee Bargains I'm very sorry that this is happening to you, but you have to be there for your son, support him, if you can, go to places with him, let him see life instead of only drinking alcohol and destroying himself. He needs proffesional help and all the love he can get. Anyways, atleast try :)
QueenBee Bargains God Bless you & your family, alcoholism is a curse, it is no coincidence that it is called a spirit. I pray that your son his rock bottom soon, that he joins AA gets sober & finds the Lord. I am a recovered alcoholic of 28 years by the grace of God.
better than that is decriminalize all drugs. then take the war on drugs budget and apply it to social programs that can help people. the problem isn't the drug. the problem is that there is no help for those that need help.
i am truly sorry for your situation, QueenBee Bargains. i'm not trying to be disrespectful. i just think it's time to ditch failure like policing drugs and start looking for solution
Both my husband and I quit drinking about a year and a half before our daughter was born. She will be 14 this year. I don't remember my last drink, and I don't miss it. It does affect our social life though, we are basically home bodies, raising our daughter. It seems that everyone else does drink, especially at any social occasions, and watching other people drinking and getting tipsy, or drunk is not my idea of fun, so we just stick to ourselves. Alcohol is an ugly drug.
I don’t drink anymore but still enjoy being with people who enjoy a drink, I don’t like walking in on people drunk, but I like to start the evening with them and I end up having as much fun as they appear to have...they always ask me how I don’t have a hangover ...they don’t even notice I’ve been on the tonic water or Coca-Cola all evening
Everyone thinks they are sexy when they are drunk. All drunk people are annoying including myself. I remember drinking 9 beers and calling people on the phone. Mistake lol
Well if you all kept drinking you still wouldn’t have much of a social life with young kids me and my husband drink at home everyday and trust me we have no social life I’d rather be sober and in the house than drunk and in the house
Thank you for taking this journey and sharing your feelings. Very brave. Finding a way to get unresolved feelings about terminal disease if courageous. I am sorry your father was ill and did not get well. It's not your fault. I too was brought up by alcoholics. It's my challenge to overcome. I am happy and content singularly. I tried to save the alcoholics but they did not want help.
Poor guy. One of the memories of my dad was being 10 years old, living in chicago and me waiting in the car for hours outside the bar until he came out piss drunk and I would have to drive the car home, yup, a 10 year old driving his drunk dad home. I became his 10 yr old enabler.
That's the way my wife was with her dad, including driving him home. He finally quit when his first grandkid was born (my daughter). Addiction is horrible.
I'm 23 & my first baby's due in 2 months. I'm an alcoholic, I'm 8 months sober (big deal for me, I was very close to death) for the first time since I was 17. I hope and pray to the universe that my drinking doesn't return with vengeance or AT ALL once my baby is born :,(
Caitlin K be strong, day by day. you deserve to give yourself your best caring love. if you ever need to chat, you are in dark place, reach out. also to me. be strong, girl. all the best
Caitlin K be strong, day by day. you deserve to give yourself your best caring love. if you ever need to chat, you are in dark place, reach out. also to me. be strong, girl. all the best
Caitlin K I'm almost 6 months. You can do it. I have a 9 yr old and a 1 yr old. It's soooooo much easier being a good dad sober. More money. More energy. More time. Alertness in the middle of the night when the baby needs me is second to none sober. I don't wanna go back into the sluggish fog. Stay clear and healthy
Very touching. Good on you Calum for doing that it must have been so hard. Onwards and upwards from now on. I've just finished reading your book brought me to tears a few times. Your are an amazing young man and I also think your mother is also an amazing woman. Well done.
This really hit home...dont give up on you. As a child of an alcoholic in my 50s, my dad died at 80 still an alcoholic, I now know why my relationship issues are always difficult. Being a middle child of 5 kids, my mother struggled hard to keep dad sober and spent mor etime on that quest than mothering us. I was a daddys girl and just wanted attention, so for my 15th birthday he bought me alcohol and so it began.I am now divorced,my kids dont speak to me and my mother still blames my dad for her issues and for being a terrible father. I see her as an addict too......an addictive personality. She too is on her 3rd marriage, never drank but never knew what to do.I no longer drink but it destroyed , our relationships with each other and our lives. Great insight....thanks.
I believe we as children of alcoholics always have this dread of not being loved by the alcoholic parent. I was angry for many years because I felt my father chose drinking over me. It will haunt me forever, but I've learned to accept it. My father, as yours, had everything to live for. He was a self made millionaire in his late twenties, a business man. Like you, I have to hear all of the stories of how wonderful he was, he was kind and generous. My mother told me he didn't really drink much until he hit his late twenties, he was dead at 38. I was in kindergarten the day he died. Most of my memories are of visiting him in hospitals. I had three teenage siblings at the time of his death. Losing a parent at any cost is hard, but living most of your life thinking you weren't worthy enough for them to stick around just sucks. In my opinion, my father committed suicide that took near ten years to accomplish and his family had to watch the show. I wouldn't wish this nightmare on any family.
This is a topic I've avoided for many years. Both parents alcoholics. Dad passed when I was a kid. Mom lost it and ultimately I overcame things that no kid ever should experience. I'm an adult now. I live on my own, rely on nobody but myself, proud of how far I've come. The demons are still there and I'm afraid they will never go away. I just want to let it go.
Calum Thank you for sharing your story. I suspect this will really ring true for many young adults like yourself. It's been 8 years since you recorded this video. I hope you have been able to move on in your life. Best wishes.
So powerful, it must have been hard to talk about this, especially on camera. My father passed away when I was 13 because of his drinking and I'm 23 now. I'm still struggling to forgive him, and forgive myself, because I was so horrible to him before he died. I hated him for what he did to my mother and my sisters, but if I could change anything about my life, it was how I treated him before he died. Sometimes I think I'll carry this guilt with me for the rest of my life.
8.5 years sober. Regret the day I had my first drink. 20 years wasted and the damage is done. At least I stopped before the twins were born - that's what I'm most proud of, not being a drunk dad. Alcohol is not our friend.
+Nautilus1972 Good for you. I drank so much in 2002 and 2003, that it damaged my brain and left me with memory problems. Alcohol id a poisonous substance and should not be promoted as anything other. A few pints at the weekend and a special occasion is fine, but there are so many people who are now in trouble with the stuff.
Best of luck.
Nautilus1972 - I'll hit 6 months in two days. Glad I'm on this side of it
Nautilus1972 Well done you. You should be proud of yourself. I'm 5.6 years at the moment. It's not easy. It has taken a lot away from me yet through the steady grilling recovery I gained much more in the long run. Working at sobriety is an achievement in itself. We can get knocked down but we have the strength to get back up is the main thing.
Wonderful!! You should be proud I also stopped before my son was born I've been sober twenty years and like you I'm glad my son has a sober mom. Enjoy your life and your an inspiration to others.
Nautilus1972 Congratulations. Good on you. Keep it up!
This documentary is powerful. I was touched on so many levels. I'm a recovering alcoholic of two alcoholic parents. My 17 yr old son had a drunk mom for almost 10 years. My parents were drunk until I was almost 30. We've all since found help none of us drink anymore. I worry about my son though. Thank you for being so brave and making this film, Calum.
melipstik stains congrats on your soberly may I wish you true love for the future.. maybe u should talk to your son about your emotions as far as what you were going threw give him the answers he deserves even if you are hurt physically it will make your son give you even more respect... you are very lucky to get over this and make a better life for your son after all it's NEVER too late I'm proud of you and I wish my own mother gave me the gift you gave your son I wish you the best of luck sweetie
+melipstik stains Yep, if you cant handle it, then abstain completely.
You all caught a blessing. Your case is rare.
melipstik stains Yes, but marijuana is illegal, (In my state) while alcohol is legal, advertised on TV, YT etc... BTW, I'm at 22 months sober this time (11 years sober before my lengthy relapse) and I was diagnosed with cirrhosis for my one year anniversary. ;-( But my health & bloodwork & vitals keep getting healthier and healthier, and my youngest child went from an "at risk kid" with barely passing grades to straight A's in/as a part of my sobriety. Both of my daughters had much worse than an absent mother for 9 years. Take it easy, one day at a time & best wishes.
melipstik stains Awesome that your all getting help.
give that women a medal she did all the right things and the way she talks so proper
Calum is a beautiful person inside and out. I'm so glad he's using his experiences to help other children.
I commend Calum for his journey of discovery, but, in my mind, his mom is the hero in this story. She had no delusions regarding George and turned her back on his fame and fortune for the good of their son. Well done.
TheAndrealee01 I think she managed to hold onto the fortune bit....good job really as the fame bit can be so damaging
He may not have been able to do something like this & work through his own trauma while creating a documentary to help others if she has stayed. She did a great job.
@@aprilapril2 he didn’t have that kind of money for her to hold on to. By the time she left him he was playing in the US for not that much money & you gotta remember he was a raging addict and used all his money to fund his addiction. She probably went and got a high paying job herself or married a wealthy man in LA.
@@LudiCrust. yeah. I think it was under her own steam.. I doubt she was freeloading..just saving herself and her boy
Impressed by Calums openness & down to earthness and how real he is. This doc doesn't feel contrived or false in any way.
It doesn't help we live in a culture that applauds heavy drinking. It's expected in college, sporting events, St Patrick's Day, New Years....
Agree with the college, but the others? Whats wrong with enjoying a good few beers and a pie watching the 6Nations that comes around once a year, like the others ?
Its the daily consumption that affects health and lives
I agree, no one celebrates anything without alcohol
Sober for 5 days!! This documentary is helping me a lot !!! Thanks x
Manu J R Good luck pal hope you're still sober! Will pray for you
Manu J R I'm sober 6 weeks. Newbies😁 we can do this!!!
Manu J R chug!!!
The vice is hard to kick!
Hope you keep going!
I really wish him the very best. I love the way he's trying to think through all these complicated emotions and memories, and how he's willing to share his story to help others. He has a beautiful soul and I'm so glad I watched this.
You can't see past the fact that he knows all the answers but pretends he didn't know what was wrong.he knew. He's doing this because his dad is famous,otherwise his documentary would be a flop.
There is plenty of info about alcoholism in the states. He says there's not much education there about it,but I'm not buying it. I know first hand,and it's not rocket science.
So happy I got sober when my daughter was six. I’ve had a couple of relapses but I’ve been able to get back on my feet pretty quickly.
My dad was an alcoholic and as a kid i remember how much i wanted the police to stop us when my dad would chuck down two vodka bottles and would drive around with me in the back seat. Kids should never go through stuff like this. I was 11 years old, in the back seat of my dads car, scared to death because my dad was driving like a maniac and i was praying to God to send a police man our way that would randomly stop us and arrest my dad. Never happened! We had to endure the torture of living with him till he drank himself to death. Alcohol is a drug and people need to stop thinking that a couple of beers every evening are perfectly fine and ok. This attitude needs to stop.
very sorry to here this.
Kiki von Dugong that is so sad, I am so sorry for your pain. It never should have been that way, you are right
Sorry for what you went through. Many people can drink a couple of drinks and not become alcoholics.
You are quite a guy Calum Best. Brave, honest and giving. You are making your father proud, just being.
My dad is the exact opposite. He works at a rehabilitation center and I've never seen him drink in my 20 years of being alive. I think he's afraid of alcohol. I don't blame him
You have no idea how lucky you are
90009kitkat I love him so much ❤️ he's my role model
Omg I wish my mom would be that way😪
D Town WORD
God bless this beautiful young man, I so feel his pain.
You are thick
Beautiful guy, how he let's us watch him as he comes to term with his dad being alcoholic, seeing his struggle and the emotional conflictive feelings growing up with a father who was clearly not there for him during the course of his life. Then again, when I see his mother I can sorta understand why their relationship is so strong.
So much heartbreak and turmoil even writing this. My father was a functioning alcoholic, but the last 8 years everything fell apart and it's a miracle that he's still alive at 64. It's hard to portray how much of a miracle it is, since he always drank until cross-eyed drunk. So much heartache thinking of the past...
My mom became a hardcore alcoholic when I was 5. She died June 26, 2019 - when I was 17 weeks pregnant with her first grandbaby. She also couldn't come to my wedding because she was just so drunk all the time. It's definitely an illness, and I challenge the concept of 'choice': once the addiction takes full hold, the choice to drink or not is gone. However, the need to drink comes from a deep place of shame, usually from childhood trauma. So the person CAN choose to face their pain (with therapy, treatment, possibly medication, other modes of healing). The problem is, facing that pain is so deeply terrifying that they would often rather blow up their lives than face it.
I often wonder the same thing as the host: if she loved me, could she stop? What does it say about me as a person that my mom drank so much? Am i allowed to be angry if there is no choice? I feel guilt for feeling angry, too. The worst thing is you can't actually tell your addicted parent the pain they have caused you: they will feel shame and drink more to ease their shame, instead of soothe you and apologize. My mom would apologize but her shame would become so big that she would disappear into the bottle and then I would fear she would die because of me. To all alcoholic parents out there, if you can, ask your kids how your drinking affects them and really listen for the answer. Let your kids let their pain out.
Have them write it down.
I'm compelled to answer your comments which is not something I do as I myself have 3 teens whom I raise very much on my own. The reason? 7 years ago I stopped drinking. My husband could not understand the new sober wife and left. I was delighted, why? Because 2 parents unhappy in a house do more harm to a child than separated. The healing in recovery needs daily help. The direct open conversations with our children comes first. No one else matters as our kids did not choose to arrive with an alcoholic mum. My kids were 7,9, and 10 when I stopped, still affected even though I was nowhere near rock bottom, still running a successful business, aobly drinking wine at night. My only sister is 26 years sober.
My children have also been exposed to a nasty divorce and dry drunk. Almost as bad as active drinking. I attend AA, but I'm not absorbed by the process either, recovery for me is regaining my family, my confidence and my happiness.any mum out there today reading this if you are in that bottle today,if it has become your only friend,remember it will turn on you, it will turn your family and friends to abandon you when it's just too much to handle. Calm best talks ot being abandoned in Old Trafford..on the night of my first daughters communion, I left all the family at home and went to a party. Soon after this I began to listen and still I drank for another 2 years.That is the hold addiction takes. It may be in our DNA. I will forever regret any residual effects,but, being in recovery we have a chance to change the direction of our children's lives. ISNT THAT WORTH IT?
I grew up with alcoholism in my family including my mother, I grew up abused and neglected... now I'm 35, married to a good man but still struggling with issues from my childhood(nightmares, social anxiety, depression, etc) but I did chose to not touch alcohol, I've never even been drunk and I also chose to not have children.. I just feel I'm too damaged and there's no need for me to bring more people into the world. Addiction has deep deep lasting effects so please get help if you're struggling with it.
Well done that you stand by your decision and have thought it through! Don't let anyone tell you that you've made the wrong decision. You've made it, it's to do with your life and your body.
@odin gave his eye to acquire knowledge Shes smart to make a decision to not have children. Alot goes into that decision including finding a suitable person to help raise the child. Today almost every woman I know has had multiple kids from different men. There are blended families. I made lots of mistakes in my life but one I didn't make was bringing a child into the world when I wasn't equipped to cope and deal with life. She's not the problem. A good life means different things to different people. You can have a great life without kids as well. More freedom.
You are smart Carrie. I don't have kids either for similar reasons. Im in therapy now trying to deal with my own issues.
You sound like a smart person. But if you feel a loss over no children there are plenty that need a parent. Even if you just volunteer.
@odin gave his eye to acquire knowledge wtf dude!! STUPID COMMENT FROM A STUPID PERSON!!!
"What a waste". That hit me harder than anything. So true, the time you waste with alcohol, the life, the people. Awful.
What a strong person he is to have done this and addressed his fears and issues about his life with his alcoholic father. Beautiful documentary. Thank you for sharing this :)
My first husband drank every day until the day he died
He was 35. He was never going to stop.
I stopped in 2001 because I promised my son, who was 7 at the time, that I would never drink again - he is now 23 and I love him and his sister more than life itself, their early years are a blur but I would like to think I came back from the edge just in time
The sense of shame of my 20 years drunk never leaves me and has kept me sober for 17 years and counting.........
For anyone out there who has a drink problem what is more important? Your family or your local barman? If it's the former then get help - never has there been a better time to get the professional support that is needed
Top man! Love your message! 🔝❤️
what a clever way to protect their identities.
Jess Brajer I wish the alateen group I attended had been like that!
Jess Brajer making it fun, I love it!
Clever and adorable.
You are lucky to have a loving and down to earth mom! Don't repeat his mistakes I hope👍
What an amazing strong down to earth guy Calum is, and handsome as well.
Noggsy joggsy watches There’s a lot of hurt and rage. And why shouldn’t there be?
Jesus did you see him on cbb
What a wonderful guy, at least he had the support of his mom, some of us were all alone. May we find peace and forgiveness in our hearts.
Excellent documentary. Callum is an exceptional young man to share openly his pain and desire to help himself as well as others. So terribly sad that alcohol is legal despite the millions upon millions it kills, mains and destroys. I pray he finds his peace and answers to his questions. Well done.
A great doco and very emotionally confrontational with a person who is a son, brother, father, and was a great legend in football, but has a addiction that only the addict can change. RIP George Best. Blessings to his son Callum who has been dealing with his own feelings about his Dad, good luck for your future...
Whoa. Good for Calum Best, such an intelligent, gracious, and thoughtful man. Especially because his father was so well thought of, so beloved by so many. This took some kind of courage.
To be drunk and still play at that level, the guy must be a bona-fide legend in the sporting sense. How could someone function so highly while regularly binging? It seems impossible.
Bravo to Calum and all who made this doc. This is a very important issue to bring out of the shadows and provide an open, safe ,forum for people affected by alcoholism and drug addiction to "let it all out". Thanks so much. Be well. :)
absolutely brave on so many levels, to make peace with himself and father he adored and tried to connect with throughout his life.. i´ve seen so many lives suffer due to addicted loved ones.its such a tough disease to overcome but he addressed it in such a constructive way..such an example boy..George´s best result!
Shout out to all the ACOAs watching this documentary.
Alcohol is a poison.
It's worse than weed
Yep the same as heroin its a shame.
_Productivity_ _Nill_ 💯
thank you for this. my father was an alcoholic. while he was present in my life every day, he really wasn't and that's because he was always drunk or passed out. he couldn't tell me my favorite color, my best friend's name or what i studied in college. he was a true 100% narcissist along with the addiction so having a relationship with him was i'm possible. he died 3 years ago and i didn't even cry. i wasn't even sad because you can't miss what you never had. if anything i was glad he was gone because it was a huge stress lifted from my life.
i've tried my whole life to be better than him and now i'm dealing with my own dependency with prescription pain killers that i have to take because of the sick body my soul occupies. i try so hard not to be like him but unfortunately i seen myself repeating a lot of the same patterns. i don't try to get high, in fact i don't even like being high. i just want to be comfortable and i want to sleep. if i'm asleep than it makes time go faster and i don't have to suffer through the bad emotions. it's a battle everyday for sure!
Ashley Klug the last part of your comment sounds like me when i explain why i drink.
After you said "i don't even like being high".
I also believe many men are depressed and don't know how to cope with it, so they drink to numb reality and just try to drink to get through life.. then everyone around them suffer...
My dad was the same way and now i have become the same, until recently.. now i was to be normal.
Reach out for help and take as much of it as you're able.
Seek help. Start the process. You are having that choice. You are worth it and owe it to yourself. Best wishes!
jib bo......agree 100 % . I believe mental health issues are controlled by many with alcohol
I know i do , i,m alcohol depentdent and drink far to much but im addressing this ......hope your well pal
Alcohol took my Dad's life. he killed himself at age 42. I still struggle on an emotional rollercoaster between pity and hate.
I didn't know him sober. He rejected me, he wanted a boy.
He started drinking in the Marines. our military is a culture of drunkeness. Shameful.
Linda Nickell I feel the pain my mum was taken by it this year aged 31
Linda Nickell sorry for that. Which military? I suppose they all are, to a point. Good luck, though.
Jamstarhud27 Beast sorry.
Love yourself as much as possible, all the best to you.
Linda Nickell move on and forget him, I've done the same in my life no one becomes alcoholic and start abusing their family and close ones by accident, it's a choice they tough they could do it, and if you in anyway blame your self just stop. God bless
From birth to 10 years of age, until my parents divorced, they were both alcoholics. My Mother was also bi-polar. When you are young, you don't know that its not supposed to be that way. You just live in it. Emotional and physical neglect. Being terrified and screaming watching them physically fight with each other and break things. Watching your mother bleeding because her arm went through a window because she was shoved into it. Being sent away to different relatives and not knowing it was because our Mother was in a mental hospital. Being woke up in the middle of the night to run away because dad was gonna shoot us. This was back in the 1960's. Nobody every reported any of these things. There is much more but it would be too long to tell. I can say this, now being 55 years old. That you will never really know or understand why they were like that. Why they couldn't see the profound negative effect they were having on there children. I developed what I know now as anxiety when I was 7. I had a phobia of people (no trust). I carried a lot of anger when I was a teen because I realized that my home life was not how it should have been. I know today that I will always have this hole in my heart for the things I didn't get from my parents, like love, guidance, nurturing etc. All the normal things parents are supposed to give to their children. I went through many years of feeling such anger about it. I cried over it so much. I felt worthless. How could I have any value if my parents didn't even value me. I did therapy, several times, over the years. Talking about it helps, but it cannot, nor will it ever, change it. You can't get it back. Its not our fault, our parents were sick. Even though my dad thought he was a good dad, but he couldn't remember all the bad stuff he did cause he was in a drunk black out. I can say this, about living through that, I never put my own children through that kind of upbringing. For me I feel that God's grace covered me, and let me be the chain breaking of this cycle of addiction, that seems to run in our family. I know I will always feel the lack of not having loving, good, kind parents. But I was able, by God's grace, to be a good parent to my own. I hope you will do your best to live in each day that you have and do your best with it. Its difficult to let go of the bad memories, but just keep pulling yourself into the present moment and live for you, now, and love those whom you love with all your heart. Sorry this got so long. But you are young, and I hope that you don't dwell in the past too long, life is always moving forward. Find your peace in this and every day.
hey we might be related I have a very similar story
Hey Robin =) I'm sorry that you had this similar upbringing. I hope and pray that you will overcome or come to a place of peace with the past. Just keep living in the day you have, do your best with it. If you ever want to talk with me please feel free to message me. Be blessed and keep moving forward. Hugs.
bbrees I have overcome , but sometimes I cry ,thanks for your offer to chat and I hope that you too are moving forward ,its the most we can do and feel proud and powerful for what we have overcome ..eh..
Crying is a good release. I'm glad that you have overcome. I just take things one day at a time. When I catch myself thinking about things that are painful, I pull myself back to the present. Sometimes its hard because the emotional pain is very overwhelming. Sometimes you just have to hug and comfort yourself. Just keep on going. My best love to you in your life. We are not alone in these battles.
Thank you for your post XX
Brought up by the booze 2 ,can really relate with calum apart from the fame .Thank you man massive respect.
At first i thought he'd be lookin like Jude Law
LadyKnowsCharlie me too
LadyKnowsCharlie Me too!..... 'image of him.
He looks good just like his father did.
grimlund ... He looks nothing like his Dad. He's trying so hard to grasp on to his fathers fame. Callum's mother is a fruit-cake.
I think he resembles Jonathan Rhys Meyers. Handsome guy...
They make him out like he was a saint or something. My god, he was just a regular person with an incredible, god-given talent...and his share of flaws. People need to stop turning sports stars into moral heroes.
Just a regular person?.....He played for Manchester United, no regular person does that.
Wow, incredible documentary. Thank you...
This is the first time I realised how decent a man Calum is. I wish him all the best. Take care mate
Poor lad. All the best to him and all the other children of alcoholics, including me, in the future.
Handsome lad, just like his dad. Thanks for this documentary.
:(no
Calum, thank you so much for your courage to do this documentary. I too at 41 are still struggling with making sense of an abusive alcoholic father. The guilt gets me so often and I totally relate to commitment issues - I always thought it was just me :-) nope. Im not sure these things in life are something we get "closure on" just my opinion, i think we learn with our wisdom how to mange the pain and chose a different perspective through the eyes of our adult selves instead the lost invalidated invisible child we were so desperately seeking to be seen. Big massive love to you and thank you
Touched a raw nerve. wishing Callum closure, great film.
I was saddened to see the negative effects on children of alcoholics
My dad was a mean alcoholic. He was a respected homicide detective, so this was our big family secret, but I am pretty sure many others knew. My mom was just mean. I think she was so beaten down. He used to sit her in a chair and begin by shouting at her, and cursing. We 5 kids would sit on the stairs and listen. When he began to get physically violent towards her, as opposed to just breaking things, the oldest would go and try to break it up. We walked on eggshells all the time; anything could set him off. If a child got murdered, he would REALLY be upset, and drink a lot. Yet when we went camping in the summer, he did not drink and could be fun. But we were all too scared of him to have fun with him. I remember my mom telling me when I was about 12 to get in the raft with him in the river. I was 100% positive I was not going to come back alive. We are all adults now, and grandparents. We are all screwed up and some of us don't speak to each other. Some of us suffer from depression. It affects you your entire life. But we all made sure OUR kids had it better. When my husband drinks, I stay away. It grosses me out.
And when my father was a young cop, he got a call to get a drunk out of the gutter. When he got there, he found that the drunk was his own father.
Ive been born and raised in the United States so I had no idea about your father who was obviously a huge soccer (football?) star....Congratulations on stepping up and speaking out about such a silent problem. Powerful documentary. I realized I began to have a problem with drinking and I have quit cold turkey. Amazing thing is I feel great. Some things in life can only be experienced to realize the refreshing and life they bring. Thanks for your honesty and humbleness throughout this great video. I feel like I know you.
What a beautiful Man.
This is the best documentary I've seen on this subject. How raw and honest. Thank you for sharing your truth with the world.
I'm glad to have seen this, at random! I spent 6 years in a relationship with an Alcoholic, and my son, from this relationship, who is 5 now, I always wonder just how he will grow up having to put up with his alcoholic father. It's surely not fair! I left that mentally and emotionally tumultuous relationship just over a year ago, and I am glad to have moved apart from all of that chaos, especially for my son's well-being!
great documentary thx Calum for doing this stay strong and raise a family without alcohol being a part of it. u can be a good parent
He has a daughter that he has never acknowledged.
Poppy Fields i was not aware of that , and why didn't he ?!
+Rubert Max. He has refused to do a DNA test.
Poppy Fields hmm interesting
Rubert max it's sad that if that's his daughter that his being as unavailable to her as his dad was to him... sad how history repeats itself!
What an awesome look into a horrible situation. I hope he continues working on himself, getting that emotion and anger it's time to be dealt with, and goes on to find some resolution. I'm sure his mother would be more than thrilled for him to do so and she definitely did a good job leaving when she did. No telling how badly this would've been if he had the added trauma of seeing it effect his mother longer than he did.
Extremely touching and sad. Thanks Callum for making this.
I like the add for liquor land during a documentary about alcoholism, nice one, class
Alcohol destroys people, families, children, dreams, hopes. That's really sad.
Gia Gi it's destroyed my parents marriage after nearly 35 years of marriage. They're getting divorced soon. My mum just can't do it anymore. I feel sorry for my dad even though he makes me angry
***** I'm planning my dad's funeral in my head. Sounds awful but I now know I can't save him
My father is an alcohoolic too but my mother divorced him when I was 6 because he was beating her...I can still remember the fear when he was drunk and I knew what is going to happen. Now I am 26 and very good without him. I am really sorry for you and your parents Domine Wimbury because I can think that after 35 years of marriage your mother have been through alot. @Roberta Janson you don't need to feel bad for saying that you were glad when your father passed away because I had times when I wished mine did it too. We don't choose our parents but sometimes is better without one of them. God bless you, your mother and as well for @Domine Wimbury and her family.
Western Culture ??? Booze Destroys most ALL cultures
This is the reason many armies won a battle, giving the enemy their drug of choice! Walt
I hope this handsome fellow has figured it all out. God bless.
I lost my little sister and best friend to this illness. She was so young and left 5 beautiful children. Today is the best day to get clean.
I’m not an alcoholic nor do I even drink but I do struggle with substance abuse problems and people just truly don’t understand how hard it is to quit. How embarrassing it is. How badly you want things to change, but it’s so much harder than people think. That’s what I thought. It’s a struggle and I promise you if people could quit overnight a HUGE percentage of people would.
My mum was an alcoholic. She would never admit it. I turned into an alcoholic. It's hard to deal with.
What a unique blend of the American and English accent.
Wasilla James American and Irish.
His mother brought him up and she is English. His dad was Irish ☘️
HIS dad was from Ireland so Irish@ITubaUTuba
@@aprilapril2 northern ireland, not ireland.
Dan Ball ooo ok. Forgot there was an absolute distinction there! Yeah .correct... I can’t hear any Irish in his accent now though
Very good documentary. Thank you Calum for sharing this with us. You are a very beautiful compassionate soul, loving and sharing and I hope this very difficult childhood and past will find closure very soon. I hope many can learn from your experience.
Sally is to be totally respected. She loved her son enough to stop and he will know that in life about his mum - that she loved him more than the alcoholic. Wonderful woman and what she's doing. The fact she stopped shoed strength and will install strength in her son.
I almost wonder what George Best's professional peers, coaches, etc., would say in terms of their personal experiences dealing with his alcoholism, and if it ever affected him as a player, beyond his obvious triumphs and challenges that made him one of the greatest.
Calum thank you for sharing your private struggles with us❤️ The legacy of your dad leaves through you! Cherish the beautiful moments you shared together and forgive the bitter ones. Its not easy but it’s important to let go.. so you give room for beautiful things to come your way. You are an exceptional son and I’m sure your father loved you with all his heart. Remember the good times, let go of the bad times.❤️❤️
PS: I’ve never been diagnosed as an alcoholic but doing my own research I think I was either on my path to becoming one, or I was what they call a functional alcoholic. I am honestly very tired of the feeling of being drunk. The headaches and sometimes regrets of the night before. I decided to turn my life around and cut off alcohol from my life. It’s simply not enjoyable anymore. So whats the point? This video has been very motivating for me. Makes me feel great about deciding to dump alcohol. Life is so much more that being wasted. Thank you again for sharing your story!
What a lovely person Calum is.
I'm an ex alcoholic, well, I say "ex" but I'll always be an alcoholic ,and I still struggle every day of my life. But I'm 10 years sober now, and I have full custody of my daughter. I'm married to a beautiful lady, and we have 2 more daughters. Praying for anyone with this disease. Xx
My mom would rather drink than feed me when I was an infant
If you want to love drugs, so be it. But you cannot be a responsible adult and a druggie.Just don't have kids. There's your answer.
God is Cancer yes AGREE
Life is so simple for the simple-minded, like you.
u just said it ur self... be a responsible adult and dont have kids... but alcoholics are not responsible adults, if they where they wouldn't be drinking, never mind the kids part... lol
Right! Don't ever have kids.
My brothers and sister messed up their kids' lives with alcohol and stuff, and I decided never to have kids. I never get over traumas.
There is a group called Adult Children Of Alcoholics . They are great in helping us get over the damage done to us by our alcoholic parents.
Thanks for sharing this significant part of your journey. Hope you keep on healing...
my husband was an alcoholic. he passed away in 2013 after he committed suicide in rehab. he left me, his son and now he would've been a grandad. the first year was rough. the second year I thought what can I do go help others from going through this..now I teach AA classes to help other people and their families. if I can help one person my husband didn't die in vain. I miss him terribly and I know the alcohol was destroying him from the inside. so I'm trying to make his memory a positive one and I need to let the grandkids know what an amazing man their grandpa was.
Alcohol was the ruin of my family. My mother died from end stage liver disease when I was 30, it was a horrendous, shocking death. I knew she had liver disease and told my parents, but was admonished for being hysterical and scaremongering.
Her death happened over a period of 48 hours, it was bloody, brutal and still haunts me, ten years later.
Five years after my mum passed away, my father succumbed to his own addiction and died from heart failure on my 35th birthday. I found him in the living room, asleep. His death broke my heart.
Five years on, I have a beautiful, two year old son and vow I will never put him through the horror I lived through and am still affected by.
Ours was a loving family, ruined by alcohol, which was used as a crutch.
Tara Mulholland Yeah, that really is an ugly, nasty death.
Hope you’re well and recovering from their crap. How fortunate your child(ren) are to have a mom who is present and engaged with them. There’s no finer Legacy we can leave our children and grandchildren than the total repudiation of the lifestyle of our “parents” that never were.
Take care.
Godspeed 🕊
Really brave Calum. You went on a journey a lot of us children of alcoholics think about but don't always have the strength or means to do. My dad is currently battling several cancers exacerbated by his drinking. I know his time is nearing, and I am at a loss for what to do or how to bridge the gap but this documentary really spurred me to take some sort of action. I won't have the chance again.
I know of a little girl she was 4 when she found her daddy dead from the alcohol there is a major problem with alcoholism in this county thanks for highlighting and to Calum for being so strong can't be easy but programs like this help people understand the devastation caused by this disease
This was so powerful. Thank you
Bless him. I know this is an old documentary, but I hope he found his path to making peace. I went through something similar with my mother. It took me years to come to terms with it not being my fault. She took so much out on me, but she was sick....fighting her own demons. I've lived a lifetime with the scars. It made me who I am, and I've always felt like a broken, malfunctioning human being. I suppose we spend too many years thinking it's our fault, but it helps so very much when we realize it isn't. It gave me great love and compassion for my mom and all she endured that made her a broken, sick person. I'll always live with the scars, but I'm so thankful to no longer hate my mom, but pity her. I hope this young man found his way through. And of course so many others dealing with the same hurts and loss.
I just love Calum Best, Angela did an amazing job raising him.
Thanks for posting this was sad but it gave me a better understanding of calum and why he did some of the things he did when he was younger.
That's a tough gig as a child.thanks for your honesty. I can't imagine how difficult that must have been.
This is so healthy. Wish i could have communicated on this level with my mother.
I wish they would make alcohol illegal. My exhusband was an alcoholic and is now dying from it,and he still drinks.My son is an alcoholic, who is so bad that he gets the shakes if he doesn't drink . I'm watching my son die alittle each day.This is killing me because he is such a good man with a good heart He's been to rehab 3x,but has relapsed. He started drinking heavily when he found my first granddaughter, his neice Lauren,dead at 3 months.I don't want my son to die.Please pray for him.
QueenBee Bargains I'm very sorry that this is happening to you, but you have to be there for your son, support him, if you can, go to places with him, let him see life instead of only drinking alcohol and destroying himself. He needs proffesional help and all the love he can get. Anyways, atleast try :)
Are you really that ignorant lady? You know they DID make alcohol illegal once, and how many people died because of it?
QueenBee Bargains God Bless you & your family, alcoholism is a curse, it is no coincidence that it is called a spirit. I pray that your son his rock bottom soon, that he joins AA gets sober & finds the Lord. I am a recovered alcoholic of 28 years by the grace of God.
better than that is decriminalize all drugs. then take the war on drugs budget and apply it to social programs that can help people. the problem isn't the drug. the problem is that there is no help for those that need help.
i am truly sorry for your situation, QueenBee Bargains. i'm not trying to be disrespectful. i just think it's time to ditch failure like policing drugs and start looking for solution
great doco...well done!! thankyou!!
Is it just me or that dude looks like Jude Law?
He does
Both my husband and I quit drinking about a year and a half before our daughter was born. She will be 14 this year. I don't remember my last drink, and I don't miss it. It does affect our social life though, we are basically home bodies, raising our daughter. It seems that everyone else does drink, especially at any social occasions, and watching other people drinking and getting tipsy, or drunk is not my idea of fun, so we just stick to ourselves. Alcohol is an ugly drug.
Alcohol is a dangerous drug alright.
I don’t drink anymore but still enjoy being with people who enjoy a drink, I don’t like walking in on people drunk, but I like to start the evening with them and I end up having as much fun as they appear to have...they always ask me how I don’t have a hangover ...they don’t even notice I’ve been on the tonic water or Coca-Cola all evening
Everyone thinks they are sexy when they are drunk. All drunk people are annoying including myself. I remember drinking 9 beers and calling people on the phone. Mistake lol
Well if you all kept drinking you still wouldn’t have much of a social life with young kids me and my husband drink at home everyday and trust me we have no social life I’d rather be sober and in the house than drunk and in the house
Thank you for taking this journey and sharing your feelings. Very brave. Finding a way to get unresolved feelings about terminal disease if courageous. I am sorry your father was ill and did not get well. It's not your fault. I too was brought up by alcoholics. It's my challenge to overcome. I am happy and content singularly. I tried to save the alcoholics but they did not want help.
Awesome documentary . Watching this from New Zealand. My dad is an alcoholic, so can relate to so much in this
Poor guy. One of the memories of my dad was being 10 years old, living in chicago and me waiting in the car for hours outside the bar until he came out piss drunk and I would have to drive the car home, yup, a 10 year old driving his drunk dad home. I became his 10 yr old enabler.
That's the way my wife was with her dad, including driving him home. He finally quit when his first grandkid was born (my daughter). Addiction is horrible.
"... If you can't address things when you are young they don't just go away. In order to feel better you have to talk about it." (Calum Best)
I'm 23 & my first baby's due in 2 months. I'm an alcoholic, I'm 8 months sober (big deal for me, I was very close to death) for the first time since I was 17. I hope and pray to the universe that my drinking doesn't return with vengeance or AT ALL once my baby is born :,(
Caitlin K be strong, day by day. you deserve to give yourself your best caring love. if you ever need to chat, you are in dark place, reach out. also to me. be strong, girl. all the best
Caitlin K be strong, day by day. you deserve to give yourself your best caring love. if you ever need to chat, you are in dark place, reach out. also to me. be strong, girl. all the best
♥♥♥♥♥
Caitlin K I'm almost 6 months. You can do it. I have a 9 yr old and a 1 yr old. It's soooooo much easier being a good dad sober. More money. More energy. More time. Alertness in the middle of the night when the baby needs me is second to none sober. I don't wanna go back into the sluggish fog. Stay clear and healthy
Arco Cola well done brother.
Very touching. Good on you Calum for doing that it must have been so hard. Onwards and upwards from now on. I've just finished reading your book brought me to tears a few times. Your are an amazing young man and I also think your mother is also an amazing woman. Well done.
This really hit home...dont give up on you. As a child of an alcoholic in my 50s, my dad died at 80 still an alcoholic, I now know why my relationship issues are always difficult. Being a middle child of 5 kids, my mother struggled hard to keep dad sober and spent mor etime on that quest than mothering us. I was a daddys girl and just wanted attention, so for my 15th birthday he bought me alcohol and so it began.I am now divorced,my kids dont speak to me and my mother still blames my dad for her issues and for being a terrible father. I see her as an addict too......an addictive personality. She too is on her 3rd marriage, never drank but never knew what to do.I no longer drink but it destroyed , our relationships with each other and our lives. Great insight....thanks.
I believe we as children of alcoholics always have this dread of not being loved by the alcoholic parent. I was angry for many years because I felt my father chose drinking over me. It will haunt me forever, but I've learned to accept it. My father, as yours, had everything to live for. He was a self made millionaire in his late twenties, a business man. Like you, I have to hear all of the stories of how wonderful he was, he was kind and generous. My mother told me he didn't really drink much until he hit his late twenties, he was dead at 38. I was in kindergarten the day he died. Most of my memories are of visiting him in hospitals. I had three teenage siblings at the time of his death. Losing a parent at any cost is hard, but living most of your life thinking you weren't worthy enough for them to stick around just sucks. In my opinion, my father committed suicide that took near ten years to accomplish and his family had to watch the show. I wouldn't wish this nightmare on any family.
Christine PZ It's not that we were unworthy... don't believe that. It is them who didn't comprehend our worth.
Thank you!
Hugs for anyone who had to grow up like this, or is having to grow up like this. It shouldn't be that way.
This is a topic I've avoided for many years. Both parents alcoholics. Dad passed when I was a kid. Mom lost it and ultimately I overcame things that no kid ever should experience. I'm an adult now. I live on my own, rely on nobody but myself, proud of how far I've come. The demons are still there and I'm afraid they will never go away. I just want to let it go.
Best of luck Misty!
@@tonymurray814Wow 3 years later, I am 8 months sober and doing great now!
Calum Thank you for sharing your story. I suspect this will really ring true for many young adults like yourself. It's been 8 years since you recorded this video. I hope you have been able to move on in your life. Best wishes.
Great Doc! Well done!
So powerful, it must have been hard to talk about this, especially on camera. My father passed away when I was 13 because of his drinking and I'm 23 now. I'm still struggling to forgive him, and forgive myself, because I was so horrible to him before he died. I hated him for what he did to my mother and my sisters, but if I could change anything about my life, it was how I treated him before he died. Sometimes I think I'll carry this guilt with me for the rest of my life.
Such a brave young man.