I've been a half life fan for years now, I've seen countless videos and people talking about epistle 3 and the story of the game, but that's where they tend to stop. They'll go on for hours about how revolutionary the graphics and storytelling were for the time, about the troubling development of half life 2, about how it's such a fun place to shoot enemies in, but rarely do i see people talking about things outside of city 17, about how abandoned the world must be if this is Earth's capital, about how truly brave the scientists in half life 1 really are given the circumstances they're in. I like your channel because you're not scared to be totally utterly wrong, you're not afraid to speculate. One day i saw a reddit post on where did gordon freeman's hev suit go at the start of half life 2. While a lot of the comments were just people talking about how valve couldn't have the protagonist start the game with the armor bar, so valve had to remove it even if it makes no sense, i saw a comment by some guy talking about his head canon that's the complete opposite, how he thinks the gman took off the hev suit and gave it to Kleiner (how else did he get it?), and how he thinks stasis works, with Gman using his godly angel powers to patch people in stasis up, so they don't start the next adventure with a broken arm and a panic attack 20 years in the making. That was geniuely one of the freshest takes on the Gman I've ever heard, and it became how i view the character ever since.
If there's one thing I can say about Half Life and Portal, it's that despite all the nihilistic, depressing things going on around Gordon and Chell, them, and especially Gordon, are the two who make the biggest impression on others to the point where it's entire alien species talking about how a man with a crowbar saved them from the Combine for a time decades after the fact.
I think that’s why the HL universe shouldn’t end on some bittersweet/bad ending. “The Freeman” practically is an anomaly in the combine eyes (even HL1 shown this w HECU) who entered earth and shows how humanity and life (vorts) will never lose to evil and push through the odds
I thought the main takeaway about staving off boredom is really fascinating. It makes you think about why we are living in the most stimulating moment in history, with free internet content, video games with countless hours of playability, streaming platforms with hundreds of shows. I never thought about human advancement that way.
Yea, that's why so many get absorbed into the digital world- all the stimuli one could wish for, right at their fingertips. It is incredibly hard to break off that satisfaction because it is so easy to obtain. The previous generations did not have that, not to this extent or to this massive outreach, so they cannot understand how actually difficult it is to strife for something in the modern day when we are surrounded by the things they've built to keep us in place and consume
If you think about it though. Humans at aperture made the borealis. If that was gman's goal all along and what his employers sent him for, I guess humans really are that special.
and if you actually think about it the borealis is the combine, humanity has been fighting itself all along. and since the combine created the g-man humanity created him too.
@@mikeraphone7868 the breengrub texts plainly explains how the combine created the g-man from a mind virus within the shu'ulathoi hive mind. and the borealis/aperture being the combine is pretty obviously valves intention when you look at episode two and portal that came out at the same time.
As someone who fucking hated Epistle 3's ending, I have to thank you for your interpretation of it, you really gave me a new perspective on the matter.
I also really didn't like it. It's remarkable how I've basically never seen a single critical video or piece of writing about Epistle 3 (though, I didn't exactly try to seek them out), people just latched onto it since it was I guess the best they'd get, and anything was better than nothing. I dislike it less after this video, but I still don't like it. I would really hope that the actual story, if it were made and released, would be less nihilistic. There's lots of nihilism in HL, yes, but it was never the "right" side, it wasn't made out to be an objective truth that any resistance was insignificance. Instead the plot is fighting against nihilism, and to an extent you're winning. You keep succeeding (with lots of setbacks, mind you) against odds that should be impossible. It's not a series about being confronted with a massive alien invasion far larger than Earth and just… losing to it, accepting that the best you can do is a meaningless gesture of an attack, at a huge cost. HL2E2 ends on a cliffhanger, a low point, but the thing about low points is that you're supposed to go back up from them. Epistle 3 seems content to largely stay right at that low point, and get even lower, with little ambiguity. You don't need a happy ending necessarily, but the ending of Epistle 3 is just narratively unsatisfying in the context of the tone of the series. As an example of an ending that's still not happy but would be more satisfying IMO, if you somehow used the Borealis to break the link the combine use to create portals to earth, undoing the effect of the resonance cascade, the Earth is still left as a dying world ravaged by the combine, with huge amounts of its oceans taken away, and there's still a huge force of combine left to contend with. And they would certainly try to reestablish contact. But the fight would be theoretically winnable. That's about where I felt like the story was heading anyway; but I'm no writer after all.
@@killerbee.13 Personally what I always thought an interesting ending would be if the Combine forces on Earth manage to reinitiate contact with the Overworld, only for them to flatly decline sending reinforcements. They’ve already taken enough of earths resources to make the venture profitable, and they’re not going to risk throwing good money (or good synths in this case) after bad just suck up what’s left. The whole “local teleportation” thing that was such a major bargaining chip for humanity? The combine have at least a dozen, if not a dozen hundred other potential leads for developing it than the now clearly unreliable humans. Maybe as an added punch in the gut for the Combine forces, they order the recall of all Earths synth and transhuman forces for offworld reassignment, pursuing (maybe literal) greener pastures elsewhere. An ending like this IMO would provide closure for the series while reinforcing the themes of humans dabbling in forced way, way beyond them. Far from being the lynchpin in the Combines future development, humanity was always just one of many potential leads, and the combine forces find themselves just as chewed up and spat out by multi universal affairs as Gordon himself was.
@killerbee.13 I thought it was fitting. The story feeds you false hope that humanity actually has a chance against a cosmic empire that has conquered entire worlds but then proceeds to slap you across the face by reminding you just how obsolete you are in the grand scale of the combines schemes and how little of a chance you actually have at fighting them. Classic cosmic horror. It's quite fitting in my opinion. Not every game needs to have a bittersweet or happy ending, sometimes depressing or hopeless endings work.
One small correction to note. A Dyson sphere doesn't capture the energy of a sun going supernova. You build one to capture the entire solar output of the star. Just like putting up solar panels in your backyard, only enough of them to surround the entire sun and soak up all of the light it emits. And if you could build a Dyson sphere, it'd be a whole other question whether or not you could build one that would survive a supernova. The supernova isn't the primary source of power. Most of the energy you're trying to capture is given off by the star during it's lifetime. It's kinda like turning a star into a giant, long lasting, borderline uninterruptable power plant.
You're the best Leadhead, thank you for uploading all of these vids, it's crazy how fictional stories can really bring out more exstistential themes in our experience of life
i love leadhead's half life content but what i dont like is that she follows the "video games OR politics" ultimatum. you can only disect half life in an apolitical manner for so many years. leadhead needs to tap into the political rage she has in her nonHL videos and insert it into half life. i want more people to talk about the parallels between living in the half life universe and living in as a worker in a capitalist hellhole or living as a slave in a developing hellhole owned by the imperial core. im tired of people saying "ACTUALLY THE COMBINE ARE WOKE COMMUNISTS BECAUSE TRANSHUMAN RATION LINES" even though anonymous and protected police brutality and torture of civilians without trial is a staple of western imperialism edit: she touches on fascism a bit in this video but we need MORE. the people WANT hedonistic nihilism but they NEED paradigm shifts regarding dialectics
@@TheGLaDOSvideoCore I do agree that it would be nice if she would do stuff with both video games and politics together, but the content itself is good as it currently is.
@@TheGLaDOSvideoCore'm not really seeing the parallels with capitalism. Fascism, obviously, but the story really doesn't have capitalistic undertones, unless I'm missing something. Even then, not seeing anything overtly political. Half-Life as a series has always been above politics, in my view. It's intensely nihilistic, and politics can only really be seen as petty and insignificant when the scope of the story is so philosophical.
I love how your videos allow me to engage with media in a new way despite being a huge Half-Life fan since I was young. You reignite my passion about fictional worlds I thought I’d figured out years ago
The end credits remind me of the afterlife. Going forward with the theme of humanity, doesn't Gordon too reflect the reason why we struggle? Newton started with Gravity. In his lifetime, he wouldn't get to see the mortal-defying feats of planes. Galileo knew about the Earth's spherical shape and the galaxy, how would he react if we told him that we got to see a few planets? In the end, everyone's story has to come to a close. But humanity's fight and ambitions is like an eternal "pass the baton" game, we struggle because we know we can leave something behind as a reminder, or a carry-forward. Gordon, too, is likely considered dead by humanity. Yet he sparked a rebellion, taking down quite a bit of combine in his (notably short) rampage against Earth. Will humans despair? Maybe and maybe not. Gordon might have proven he was only a man. He might have proven that the Combine is impossible. But humans now know the Citadel isn't infallible. Their scientists now have access to technology, with the aid of Vortigaunts. I think the idea of Epistle 3 (intentionally or otherwise) is that we cannot do anything as one person. We likely will not see the overarching effects of our labour in our lifetime, nor know if our contributions actually contributed. And that's okay.
4:00 Woah I never actually drew the connection that the advisor you see in the Citadel is the Breengrub body, even after reading Epistle 3 I still just thought it was a generic advisor meant to demonstrate to the player how the advisors were being evacuated from the Citadel.
If there is a new Half Life game, and that's a big if, its probably not going to go the route of Epistle 3. I'm probably expecting something like, the Combine themselves are on the brink of a colossal, slow death. And there are things even worse out there. A greater good or an unstoppable destructive force? Who knows. In the end, G-Man comes back and tells you that his employers are changing and Freeman is now a liability. But in the end, they leave humanity alone. G-Man no longer looks like a man.
valve p much confirmed they wont be using his story by deliberately pushing that HL:A post credits scene. thats their way of saying that. likely why laidlaw said he wishes he never leaked it
@@kadenfrfx There is a sequel to Alyx being worked on that will be a VR game, but there is another Half Life game being worked on as well, presumed to be for the PC but unconfirmed.
@@writershard5065 its citadel aka neon prime, its not a half life game its their next competitive pvp game that will innovate on voxels and destruction and manipulating the enviroment. it takes place in the combines universe but doesnt have any direct ties to the half life universe, similar to portal
ever since your first video about HL2 being about human ingenuity, this thought kept developing in my mind. I remember thinking about all the variety of creature the combine used to subjugate humans and how some of them are so powerful you take a lot of time to kill them. i remember thinking the humans in that universe were in a position so overwhelmingly oppressive they would never, EVER, be able to escape them... it kind of is just how we feel nowadays... thinking about the future, the state of things, how awful things are, and WE are to each other, it all just feels like a trap we have been put into... we can't do anything. thing is there are always these little incentives to keep going. in the game it was the npcs we connected with, their optimism, how we saw ourselves in some of them. characters with their distinct personality, and all. kinda like the friends we have in real life, how they might be struggling with stuff, motivating us to help them, to be there for them, the problem is we are being conditioned to think about life globally: as that gigantic story of the survival of human race. it makes us individually feel so small and insignificant: just like the combine makes us feel in the game. the human mind is made to work locally: the small, little interactions we stablish with the people around us. thats what compels us to keep going. this is what brings joy to us. if you think thats too small, again, its the mindset of the great epic. let go of that, and be happy
its insane truly how PROFESSIONAL marc laidlaw was during -- let's not sugarcoat it -- valve's abuse. he never publicly lost his cool or went on some bender even as he was chewed up and spit out by a company of whom he claims to still consider as his personal friends. all of his reactions were incredible subtle and subconscious expressions through his work. he tried his absolute hardest to keep his pain to himself and yet he still produced amazing things (many disagree but i consider ep3 a masterpiece). a true artist living among us. i aspire to be as creative as him some day this is what profit over principle does. this is why valve is the way they are. they can try to win back our hearts with HLA and a better media presence but their current treatment of TF2 shows they havent changed or addressed their issues as a company
i feel like your comment is more indicative of the gaming industry as a whole rather than Valve specifically. If you consider Valve in this manner, you would be absolutely mortified looking at what surrounds them: safety is nowhere to be found.
@@crimson-foxtwitch2581 not entirely true. a small number of indie companies around the world have treated eachother fairly. yes it is indicative of the AAA industry as a whole, but Valve is one of the biggest contributors to that toxicity. they may be far better than say EA or Activision but they are still a billionaire company with several complaints of mistreatment against many employees, contractors, and even other companies they were working with from the small Arkane Studios all the way to Adult Swim. valve are a case study of corruption from money and fame
As somebody who has felt like I was on that beach for a while, I totally get it. Keep up the good work Leadhead. I've said it before but I could listen to you talk about Half Life for hours.
I still think that Half Life 2 without the episodes had the most satisfying ending. Gordon as a silent protagonist says nothing at all about the plight of humanity and is released on Earth to do exactly what he was required to do by whoever hired Gman - just as I imagine the combine had hired him to make Earth available in Half Life One and protect it from other incursions in Opposing Force. In the end as the citadel explodes and humanity has its moment of celebration, the individual we as the player had the most connection with (Alyx) is about to be annihilated, only for gman to pull him back away into nothingness. It shows the plot was meaningless to the flow of supply and demand as gman steps away and shuts off the light. For me, the Vortugaunts saving him, only undemined the ending and made them less ambiguous. I liked the idea that gman showing up on the TV suggested it was them that hired him to save them from the combine, and them saving Gordon at the start of episode one was a breach of contract of a kind, which is where I thought they were going with gman's sinister incursions into Gordon's thoughts in Episode 2. Epistle 3 (and the episodes overall to a lesser extent) take that away and I think it narrowed the nihilism of the original ending to Half Life 2.
i was literally just struggling with what you addressed in your conclusion yesterday. it took a 3 hour facetime call from my boyfriend to get me moving again, but this video summarizes everything beautifully! your content is always perfectly timed when i need it. thank you
Also, another thing epistle 3 reminded me a lot about durandal's dialogue in the marathon trilogy. You seriously should check it, it is one of the hardest going stories in gaming.
You're clearly in a much better place mentally and so much more comfortable with yourself these days. And that directly translates to more enjoyable, high quality content IMO.
Love your stuff lead! For your philosophy part at the very end, I think most people would say that's totally a great idea to make sure you let yourself enjoy what you make moreso than other vid ideas etc!!! SO basically YEAH go for it
Is it just me or does her unique, unnerving calm delivery make these essays about historically impactful franchises like Half Life seem even more grand and imposing? It's hard to explain it's just a feeling I get when she's laying out plots and lore.
@@Cybercerialdestroyer Pretty pathetic whenever someone makes a bunch of sockpuppets to say this shit right? Like, if they're gonna be a spiteful and bigoted loser then they could at least have the guts to say it on main.
I don't know if this is weird to say, but your voice is so pretty and I'm a little jealous since I've only just started training mine. I watched some of your older videos a while ago and then coming back to watch these, the difference is like night and day.
I hate how something as mundane as a TH-cam video can strike the fear of death in me, even at such a young age. At the same time, I love how something as mundane as a TH-cam video can challenge my thoughts in such a meaningful manner. All of this, coming from ideas brought from an equally mundane video game. But it isn't mundane, because we find purpose in its own meaning that makes it significant to ourselves.
phenomenal video as always, definitely my favorite creator when it comes to game analysis (especially half life). also, you really look great on camera :)) as a pretty long time viewer, im so proud of you
Hello Ms leadhead just wanted to say I’ve been watching your vids for the last few months I love how you’re able to breakdown and explain different aspects of games and the mindset behind them and I want to make a game one day I’ve been taking some inspiration and notes from ya . Random as this was just wanted to tell ya. I hope you’re having yourself a lovely day and a great evening:3
One thing i can rescue from the ending of epistle 3 (wich i think i commented in your video sbout human ingenuity on half life 2)is gordon's talk about the spirit of rebellion still going on is the idea of insurrection and the satisfaction comming from such as an end goal itself
i would love this ending to the story. the beach is perfection. i love when writers give me stories where things don't work out. it is far too rare where the Main characters hopes and dreams do not happen. and i love it! we need many more like that. also there is no good reason a main character cannot change. like with The last of Us 2. what ever the Future was going to be for better or worse, Gorden already played his part in it. the lives he saved and ended already vastly contributed to the narrative and it is time for the next person to step up.
I disliked last of us 2. Anyways I agree. If the series is ever concluded though, I love the idea of Freeman being taken back in time to the day of the resonance cascade. That the only way for him to defeat the combine is to make sure they can never come to earth to begin with.
I myself have been struggling with a lack of motivation and the idea that life is just meaningless. As I consider myself to be a bit of a philosopher, I believe, like some others, that there's an innate" Spark of Divinity" that rests in man, the ability and impulse to create. That Spark being caused by boredom is a fantastic way to think about it - while, yes, there isn't a meaning to life, to creating anything at all, we still do it anyway. It's rather inspiring to me, that despite the fact that there's no point, we as a species refuse to give up. Thank you, Leadhead, you've given me a lot to think about. I think with this, I can finally start pulling myself out of my rut and find my Spark of Divinity. It's so easy to give in to apathy and hopelessness, so hard to want to do anything sometimes... but nothing worth having comes easy. I believe that because life is initially meaningless, it's our very purpose to give it a meaning of our own, one that's special to and different for each individual. So here's to living, even if only to spite the fact that we have no reason to.
I sense a great amount spirit behind the keystrokes in Mark's "epistle 3" story. It's quite the statement for a writer to go that far, given at time the uncertinty of his tenure, I also love how your passion for this series hasn't changed a dime. GG excellent video (Hopefully for my favorite game I can keep that spark)
As a "much older" viewer I can only say this: You are a deep thinker for your age, must be an old soul. Tony Randall once said "Find what you love to do then kill yourself doing it!" You seem to be on the path. Just remember to have fun with it, don't take yourself too seriously, and don't over think it. Lastly, I don't think life can be boring... even after death! Love your content By The Way!
All of your content has been amazing thus far and we all understand that it is draining to make video with such an impact on such a constant basis. Nobody is expected to do that, and it is incredible you managed to do that for as long as you have. I'm excited to see what your new type of videos will be like and wish you the best with it. Keep doing what makes you happy, I (and I'm sure all your other fans) will always be here to support whatever direction you decide to take. :)
I just finished my EP1 run in VR (Got One Free Bullet and Citizen Escort first try), and regarding Gorden's emotion section, that was something... interesting. During the gameplay, especially in the beginning, I found myself often gesturing or posing myself in the spots that made sense at those moments. When doing the round about on the core, I waved over to Alyx like a cheezy lunatic from a GMod video, but gave her the "Really?" look with the Zombine joke. It was... interesting.
Glad you made video about this! I still can't stop thinking about Epistle 3 ever since Marc released it, thinking about what happened to Gordon in the end is just haunting
You gave a uniquely new angle I can't say I have thought of the series in before. I never considered how deep the implications of nihilism were, functionally in this series. In either case, great video as always!
It is interesting how different people interpret their own darkest days, depressions and even the meaning of nihilism, in general or for their own lives.
Reminds me of the book by Viktor Frankl 'Man's search for meaning or something' which is the basis of his logotherapy where the person searches for their own meaning in the world
You really hit the nail on the head with the statement that half-life is about the feeling of nihilism, the despair in the wake of complete meaninglessness. Which is exactly why I love this game, because this feeling allows you to experience the fictional space like few other games that I have played manage to, and it made me absolutely fascinated with this series. I remember that all through my playthroughs of the various games I always felt like no matter what I do and how many enemies I kill and objectives complete, this doesn't matter, I will lose either way.
Alyx believes in eternal suffering for sins and Gordon doesn't, yet he suffers regardless. It all wraps around to big J. Gordon isn't able to continue the canon because he knows good from evil and that defeats the purpose of an allegory.
i wonder if mark wrote g-man abandoning gordon for alex because, shortly before his departure, valve abandoned his story about gordon for a prequel about alex. just paranoid speculation, but given marks real life retirement to a beachy island potentially being represented as gordon inadvertently retiring to an alien beach, i believe there is a non-zero percent chance that this may be true.
I mean, I don't hope thats the case. To each their own, but to me this is a very cheap kind of symbolism that I'd trust that writers for HL would be above
The Beach Gordon was placed on was definitely on Earth. The Vortigaunts didnt throw him to nowhere, the reason why Gordon refers to his old friends and the resistance being dead and gone, is because the effects of the Borealis and the Vortigaunts teleported him far into the future of Earth. Weather the Resistance won or lost, it happened without him. Its also a Meta reference to the fact that Mark Laidlaw was unable to finish the Half Life Story, it happened without him. "Old friends silenced or fallen by the wayside - but i still feel the spirit of resistance is alive - expect no further correspondance from me, this is my final episode." - he is telling the Half Life Community to make Episode 3 through Modding, he could never do it in an official capacity anymore. There is a Canon ray of hope, however, all signs point to Portal 2 taking place far in Humanitys future, maybe around the same time Gordon returns. The first thing Chells sees on the surface of Earth is a Wheat Field...Wheat grows with Water, the Combine was draining Water from Earth. The fact that Wheat is still growing shows that, at the very least, the Combines goals were not achieved.
6:20 that part tho. Always has given me chills; almost i shudder as you spoken about the Combine and there dyson sphere, how exactly as you say wouldn't barley register as a blip to them out most powerful weapon. Its truly fascinating to me 😁
You're missing one crucial detail for why we choose to persevere as a species. Purpose. In my eyes, you have two primary objectives as a living, breathing creature. 1. Reproduce and pass on your genes. 2. Make a better world for your descendants to inhabit. Almost every positive task in life can be boiled down to either objective 1 or 2. It's a very reductionistic and simple way to look at things, but it has kept me going through tough times. I'm agnostic, but I admire the Abrahamic religious view of everyone having a purpose in life. Most people choose to persevere and succeed for their future children's success. Not everyone can have children, but they should then double down on objective 2, which is to make the world a better place. With the Combine's suppression field, they have effectively destroyed one of our main objectives, reproduction. That is why they are such an impactful villain. By stripping away one of our prime directives, they tear at the core of every human's conscience, making them dread the idea that they are the last of their species with no chance to pass on their genes. This gives humanity a burning desire to crush the combine, because the desire to reproduce is hardwired into our minds. Those that cooperate with the combine are nihilistic and are essentially crabs in a bucket, grabbing and pulling down anyone who tries to escape their low situation. They are a net negative to the success of the human species.
I agree with almost everything you said. However: siding with the combine is not necessarily nihilistic. In fact, I would call it logical, if anything. There's an even more important and general objective that all intelligent life must share to ensure its own long-term survival: Ensure the survival and progress of intelligent life, be it your own species or others. That is, humans siding with the Combine may view their actions as beneficial to the survival and progress of intelligent life, as they are beneficial to the survival and progress of Combine life. Of course the overwhelming majority of Combine-supporters are ignorant, nihilistic or stupid, but let's not ignore the intelligent minority.
@@toomanycharacter Siding with the combine is anti human. I don't give a fuck if another intelligent species exists, I will always be fighting for humanity. You abandon your kin if you side with anyone else.
Nihilism and humanity don't mix well. For all the grungy and dark cyberpunk worlds, and totalitarian Orwellian societies the human spirit can dream up we want to be positive. A ray of sunshine cutting through the smog of concrete monoliths, warming the petals of a flower growing out of the cracks. We as a species can't help but look at the silver lining. As a side note on your message on the end: I found your content not to long ago and frankly love the channel! Do what you want to do- its not the topic on hand that matters, but the way you execute investigating and extrapolating upon the subject. Its your style that matters. So long as you stay true to the way *you* make them, then I, and assuredly others, will be more than happy to watch ad Infinium.
A cold, uncaring world wouldn't need to fight opposition, it wouldn't feel the need to preserve itself, it wouldn't invite efficiency like it wouldn't invite art, the uncaring universe doesn't care about itself, do not comply to such words, it's not what you mean to the universe, it's what the universe means to *you.*
People say Gordon is a blank slate, but I disagree. I'll describe my interpretation of him from the games: Gordon Freeman is a certified genius, but down to Earth, to the point of being reckless. He's late, races Barney to get into Kliener's office for fun, has a ponytail potentially, and even ruined his coworkers lunch, just for the lulz. He's very unpretentious. He also has a decent, yet questionable moral compass. Upon causing the resonance cascade, Gordon had many opportunities to escape the facility and run away, but risked his like to try and undo the disaster he felt guilt for being part of. He didn't have to go to Xen, but he chose to. Gordon seems to be very anti-authoritarian, and rebellious. I find it especially noteworthy that he didn't have any qualms about killing US Marines, when it was apparent they were going to kill the science team. I think Gordon knew during Black Mesa, that the BEST case scenario for him after the disaster, was getting life in prison for all the murders he committed, sometimes not even in self defense. G-Man's ultimatum was essentially his only way out logically. He certainly had some affinity for guns and weapons, before the disaster, judging by his aptitude with them upon the Black Mesa Incident. I think Gordon might even be a borderline psychopath, from the amount of mayhem, death and destruction he causes, and seems relatively unaffected by. I feel that Gordon is the kind of person that might have eventually gone postal, but instead he funneled those aggressive tendencies to helping Humanity fight off alien threats.That's not to say Gordon doesn't have empathy and deeply care for his friends though. I think that's WHY he does the things he does. I think it's clear he genuinely cares for Alyx, Kliener, Eli, and Barney. TL:DR Gordon is a psychopathic genius who uses his deranged aggression for good.
I think a lot of that is you being projected onto the player, for example Gordon Freeman doesn't make the choice to fight marines, the player does. Same with the microwave casserole.
@@user9267 Canonically Gordon destroyed Magnusson's casserole, and I'd say Gordon killing the HECU soldiers is also 100% canon, as other soldiers comment on it
The vortigunts kidnaping gordon makes no sense The vortiguns admire gordon as not only a hero who saved humanity and their race but as an equal Like in ep2 when one says gordon has qualities that were though to be exclusive to the vortgunts Putting him in an island because he isnt usefull for them anymore makes no sense because they were never using him they were brother in arms
I prefer a variant of the ending where Gordon was teleported back to Resonance Cascade before it happened. That the only way to stop the combine is to make sure they could never come here to begin with
Good video. However I strongly disagree on the way you described Gordon as a doomguy like character who reacts based on what he sees and I think you misunderstood what Gordon supposed to be Gordon is meant to be the player,You. he is basically the player entity in the game world and that's i believe to be one of the reasons valve adapted this immersive environmental storytelling The way "Gordon freeman" reacts in the game world is basically your reaction,if you felt frustrated when alyx kissed the Vortigaunt before you or you laughed on the "oh my God we're doomed" scientists And i believe the reason many people didn't like epistle 3 ending because it made the player who was depicted as the most badass and powerful dude in the game world feels worthless, it made you feel worthless and what's worser the fact you were replaced by the one you trusted and liked the most and not only that but she never looks back at you leaving you all lonely. Unlike alyx vance who is already written character,for the game world her story already happened and her reactions and skill/experience will never changes if the devs never wanted to However Gordon freeman is you,your and any player reaction may varies not giving the same outcome,your skill and experience always increaseing and most important, the events won't move if you don't move it. The ending on the shores is basically a way from marc telling the player that his story in this world ended and he no more needed and the way epistle 3 been written from freeman perspective is the way the writer wanted you to feel not actual character development or something. Perhaps how great HLA was by Giving a freedom to the player in the world by not forcing him to look in certain direction and things like that it still lacked the feeling that you are the one in the events that older half life games did and I totally find it good. I also believe also that's the reason people want corporal Shephard to return,he is also one the players entities in the game world who ended up like the shores ending
Thank you for making this. Ive been lookin foreward to it since the end of the Alyx video. Epistle 3 is so special and your analysis are always wonderful. and im just a huge fan of half life.
A few thoughts. First, thank you for your wonderful explorations of the Half-Life universe. As a long-time fan of the games, these were a treat to listen to. Next, I feel like the answer to the nihilism present in the games is for everyone to read more Camus. Finally, I want to believe that Epistle 3 ends where Dear Esther begins. And I'm upset that I'll never see an Epistle 3 mod for that game.
I would love to see a video by you of Hunt Down the Freeman, because if it wasnt for the shitty gameplay, story and other, it would be a really good Half Life Fan Game with a kinda of Metal Gear vibe.
![[UNCUT] "บอสณวัฒน์" แฉ! แหล่งซุกเงินแก๊งบอส ขยันผิดที่ไม่กี่ปีก็เข้าคุก l คนดังนั่งเคลียร์ l17ต.ค.67](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/BL56qIfXYZM/mqdefault.jpg)
Love to see Epistle 3 get more attention!
It's you 😳😳
Bro ikr like why nobody talk about it
Attention, please.
YOO
How only 4 replies!??!?!?!
I've been a half life fan for years now, I've seen countless videos and people talking about epistle 3 and the story of the game, but that's where they tend to stop. They'll go on for hours about how revolutionary the graphics and storytelling were for the time, about the troubling development of half life 2, about how it's such a fun place to shoot enemies in, but rarely do i see people talking about things outside of city 17, about how abandoned the world must be if this is Earth's capital, about how truly brave the scientists in half life 1 really are given the circumstances they're in. I like your channel because you're not scared to be totally utterly wrong, you're not afraid to speculate. One day i saw a reddit post on where did gordon freeman's hev suit go at the start of half life 2. While a lot of the comments were just people talking about how valve couldn't have the protagonist start the game with the armor bar, so valve had to remove it even if it makes no sense, i saw a comment by some guy talking about his head canon that's the complete opposite, how he thinks the gman took off the hev suit and gave it to Kleiner (how else did he get it?), and how he thinks stasis works, with Gman using his godly angel powers to patch people in stasis up, so they don't start the next adventure with a broken arm and a panic attack 20 years in the making. That was geniuely one of the freshest takes on the Gman I've ever heard, and it became how i view the character ever since.
I can’t agree more - it’s crazy to me that so few people I see talking about the thematic stuff
If there's one thing I can say about Half Life and Portal, it's that despite all the nihilistic, depressing things going on around Gordon and Chell, them, and especially Gordon, are the two who make the biggest impression on others to the point where it's entire alien species talking about how a man with a crowbar saved them from the Combine for a time decades after the fact.
I think that’s why the HL universe shouldn’t end on some bittersweet/bad ending. “The Freeman” practically is an anomaly in the combine eyes (even HL1 shown this w HECU) who entered earth and shows how humanity and life (vorts) will never lose to evil and push through the odds
I thought the main takeaway about staving off boredom is really fascinating. It makes you think about why we are living in the most stimulating moment in history, with free internet content, video games with countless hours of playability, streaming platforms with hundreds of shows. I never thought about human advancement that way.
Yea, that's why so many get absorbed into the digital world- all the stimuli one could wish for, right at their fingertips. It is incredibly hard to break off that satisfaction because it is so easy to obtain. The previous generations did not have that, not to this extent or to this massive outreach, so they cannot understand how actually difficult it is to strife for something in the modern day when we are surrounded by the things they've built to keep us in place and consume
That's absolutely terrifying.
If you think about it though. Humans at aperture made the borealis. If that was gman's goal all along and what his employers sent him for, I guess humans really are that special.
I really like this interpretation
and if you actually think about it the borealis is the combine, humanity has been fighting itself all along. and since the combine created the g-man humanity created him too.
@@LANLAMPANI legit can't tell if you're trolling or just talking based on theories I've never heard before. If it's the second case please elaborate.
@@mikeraphone7868 the breengrub texts plainly explains how the combine created the g-man from a mind virus within the shu'ulathoi hive mind. and the borealis/aperture being the combine is pretty obviously valves intention when you look at episode two and portal that came out at the same time.
@@LANLAMPAN But breengrub has been confirmed as non cannon by valve tho
As someone who fucking hated Epistle 3's ending, I have to thank you for your interpretation of it, you really gave me a new perspective on the matter.
I also really didn't like it. It's remarkable how I've basically never seen a single critical video or piece of writing about Epistle 3 (though, I didn't exactly try to seek them out), people just latched onto it since it was I guess the best they'd get, and anything was better than nothing. I dislike it less after this video, but I still don't like it. I would really hope that the actual story, if it were made and released, would be less nihilistic. There's lots of nihilism in HL, yes, but it was never the "right" side, it wasn't made out to be an objective truth that any resistance was insignificance. Instead the plot is fighting against nihilism, and to an extent you're winning. You keep succeeding (with lots of setbacks, mind you) against odds that should be impossible.
It's not a series about being confronted with a massive alien invasion far larger than Earth and just… losing to it, accepting that the best you can do is a meaningless gesture of an attack, at a huge cost. HL2E2 ends on a cliffhanger, a low point, but the thing about low points is that you're supposed to go back up from them. Epistle 3 seems content to largely stay right at that low point, and get even lower, with little ambiguity. You don't need a happy ending necessarily, but the ending of Epistle 3 is just narratively unsatisfying in the context of the tone of the series.
As an example of an ending that's still not happy but would be more satisfying IMO, if you somehow used the Borealis to break the link the combine use to create portals to earth, undoing the effect of the resonance cascade, the Earth is still left as a dying world ravaged by the combine, with huge amounts of its oceans taken away, and there's still a huge force of combine left to contend with. And they would certainly try to reestablish contact. But the fight would be theoretically winnable. That's about where I felt like the story was heading anyway; but I'm no writer after all.
@@killerbee.13 Personally what I always thought an interesting ending would be if the Combine forces on Earth manage to reinitiate contact with the Overworld, only for them to flatly decline sending reinforcements. They’ve already taken enough of earths resources to make the venture profitable, and they’re not going to risk throwing good money (or good synths in this case) after bad just suck up what’s left. The whole “local teleportation” thing that was such a major bargaining chip for humanity? The combine have at least a dozen, if not a dozen hundred other potential leads for developing it than the now clearly unreliable humans. Maybe as an added punch in the gut for the Combine forces, they order the recall of all Earths synth and transhuman forces for offworld reassignment, pursuing (maybe literal) greener pastures elsewhere.
An ending like this IMO would provide closure for the series while reinforcing the themes of humans dabbling in forced way, way beyond them. Far from being the lynchpin in the Combines future development, humanity was always just one of many potential leads, and the combine forces find themselves just as chewed up and spat out by multi universal affairs as Gordon himself was.
@killerbee.13 I thought it was fitting. The story feeds you false hope that humanity actually has a chance against a cosmic empire that has conquered entire worlds but then proceeds to slap you across the face by reminding you just how obsolete you are in the grand scale of the combines schemes and how little of a chance you actually have at fighting them.
Classic cosmic horror. It's quite fitting in my opinion. Not every game needs to have a bittersweet or happy ending, sometimes depressing or hopeless endings work.
"think that valve is gman" i kinda always assumed gman was valve in a meta-literal way
Or rather, not the G-Man himself, but the "employers" G-Man often refers to, certainly.
One small correction to note. A Dyson sphere doesn't capture the energy of a sun going supernova. You build one to capture the entire solar output of the star. Just like putting up solar panels in your backyard, only enough of them to surround the entire sun and soak up all of the light it emits. And if you could build a Dyson sphere, it'd be a whole other question whether or not you could build one that would survive a supernova. The supernova isn't the primary source of power. Most of the energy you're trying to capture is given off by the star during it's lifetime. It's kinda like turning a star into a giant, long lasting, borderline uninterruptable power plant.
You're the best Leadhead, thank you for uploading all of these vids, it's crazy how fictional stories can really bring out more exstistential themes in our experience of life
You know its gonna be a banger when Leadhead is talking about the legendary Half Life franchise
i love leadhead's half life content but what i dont like is that she follows the "video games OR politics" ultimatum. you can only disect half life in an apolitical manner for so many years. leadhead needs to tap into the political rage she has in her nonHL videos and insert it into half life. i want more people to talk about the parallels between living in the half life universe and living in as a worker in a capitalist hellhole or living as a slave in a developing hellhole owned by the imperial core.
im tired of people saying "ACTUALLY THE COMBINE ARE WOKE COMMUNISTS BECAUSE TRANSHUMAN RATION LINES" even though anonymous and protected police brutality and torture of civilians without trial is a staple of western imperialism
edit: she touches on fascism a bit in this video but we need MORE. the people WANT hedonistic nihilism but they NEED paradigm shifts regarding dialectics
why did you say it like that
@@TheGLaDOSvideoCore make your own essay about it if youre that passionate about it!!
@@TheGLaDOSvideoCore I do agree that it would be nice if she would do stuff with both video games and politics together, but the content itself is good as it currently is.
@@TheGLaDOSvideoCore'm not really seeing the parallels with capitalism. Fascism, obviously, but the story really doesn't have capitalistic undertones, unless I'm missing something. Even then, not seeing anything overtly political.
Half-Life as a series has always been above politics, in my view. It's intensely nihilistic, and politics can only really be seen as petty and insignificant when the scope of the story is so philosophical.
I love how your videos allow me to engage with media in a new way despite being a huge Half-Life fan since I was young. You reignite my passion about fictional worlds I thought I’d figured out years ago
The end credits remind me of the afterlife. Going forward with the theme of humanity, doesn't Gordon too reflect the reason why we struggle?
Newton started with Gravity. In his lifetime, he wouldn't get to see the mortal-defying feats of planes. Galileo knew about the Earth's spherical shape and the galaxy, how would he react if we told him that we got to see a few planets?
In the end, everyone's story has to come to a close. But humanity's fight and ambitions is like an eternal "pass the baton" game, we struggle because we know we can leave something behind as a reminder, or a carry-forward.
Gordon, too, is likely considered dead by humanity. Yet he sparked a rebellion, taking down quite a bit of combine in his (notably short) rampage against Earth. Will humans despair? Maybe and maybe not.
Gordon might have proven he was only a man. He might have proven that the Combine is impossible.
But humans now know the Citadel isn't infallible. Their scientists now have access to technology, with the aid of Vortigaunts.
I think the idea of Epistle 3 (intentionally or otherwise) is that we cannot do anything as one person. We likely will not see the overarching effects of our labour in our lifetime, nor know if our contributions actually contributed.
And that's okay.
4:00 Woah I never actually drew the connection that the advisor you see in the Citadel is the Breengrub body, even after reading Epistle 3 I still just thought it was a generic advisor meant to demonstrate to the player how the advisors were being evacuated from the Citadel.
If there is a new Half Life game, and that's a big if, its probably not going to go the route of Epistle 3. I'm probably expecting something like, the Combine themselves are on the brink of a colossal, slow death. And there are things even worse out there. A greater good or an unstoppable destructive force? Who knows. In the end, G-Man comes back and tells you that his employers are changing and Freeman is now a liability. But in the end, they leave humanity alone. G-Man no longer looks like a man.
valve p much confirmed they wont be using his story by deliberately pushing that HL:A post credits scene. thats their way of saying that. likely why laidlaw said he wishes he never leaked it
I mean half life alyx’s ending hints more at Eli and Gordon going out to find and kill the gman.
they are making a half life game right now and have been since alyx's release, its expected release is 2025, it will be another vr game.
@@kadenfrfx There is a sequel to Alyx being worked on that will be a VR game, but there is another Half Life game being worked on as well, presumed to be for the PC but unconfirmed.
@@writershard5065 its citadel aka neon prime, its not a half life game its their next competitive pvp game that will innovate on voxels and destruction and manipulating the enviroment. it takes place in the combines universe but doesnt have any direct ties to the half life universe, similar to portal
Leadhead’s transition is a reference to the swapped genders of Epistle 3. Bravo Vince.
In both cases, it's a falsehood.
@@CombineWatermelon keep yapping
@@weaponized_toasterWhat is a woman?
@@Mopark25a human. Cool moving on
ever since your first video about HL2 being about human ingenuity, this thought kept developing in my mind. I remember thinking about all the variety of creature the combine used to subjugate humans and how some of them are so powerful you take a lot of time to kill them.
i remember thinking the humans in that universe were in a position so overwhelmingly oppressive they would never, EVER, be able to escape them...
it kind of is just how we feel nowadays... thinking about the future, the state of things, how awful things are, and WE are to each other, it all just feels like a trap we have been put into... we can't do anything.
thing is there are always these little incentives to keep going. in the game it was the npcs we connected with, their optimism, how we saw ourselves in some of them. characters with their distinct personality, and all. kinda like the friends we have in real life, how they might be struggling with stuff, motivating us to help them, to be there for them,
the problem is we are being conditioned to think about life globally: as that gigantic story of the survival of human race. it makes us individually feel so small and insignificant: just like the combine makes us feel in the game.
the human mind is made to work locally: the small, little interactions we stablish with the people around us. thats what compels us to keep going. this is what brings joy to us.
if you think thats too small, again, its the mindset of the great epic. let go of that, and be happy
Yo, this is some good philosophical stuff.
its insane truly how PROFESSIONAL marc laidlaw was during -- let's not sugarcoat it -- valve's abuse. he never publicly lost his cool or went on some bender even as he was chewed up and spit out by a company of whom he claims to still consider as his personal friends. all of his reactions were incredible subtle and subconscious expressions through his work. he tried his absolute hardest to keep his pain to himself and yet he still produced amazing things (many disagree but i consider ep3 a masterpiece). a true artist living among us. i aspire to be as creative as him some day
this is what profit over principle does. this is why valve is the way they are. they can try to win back our hearts with HLA and a better media presence but their current treatment of TF2 shows they havent changed or addressed their issues as a company
i feel like your comment is more indicative of the gaming industry as a whole rather than Valve specifically. If you consider Valve in this manner, you would be absolutely mortified looking at what surrounds them: safety is nowhere to be found.
@@crimson-foxtwitch2581 not entirely true. a small number of indie companies around the world have treated eachother fairly. yes it is indicative of the AAA industry as a whole, but Valve is one of the biggest contributors to that toxicity. they may be far better than say EA or Activision but they are still a billionaire company with several complaints of mistreatment against many employees, contractors, and even other companies they were working with from the small Arkane Studios all the way to Adult Swim. valve are a case study of corruption from money and fame
@@TheGLaDOSvideoCore Interesting, I had never heard of those things about Valve! Do you happen to have some sources?
@@gurdan-friedman you are so helpless
@@mxusoleumHuh? they just asked for sources
Always love it when Leadhead revisits the Half Life series
Really??? now way!!!
gorgon
fre .....mna..
W pfp... wait I just spoke... fuck
I won’t like, it’s at 69…
I really liked this video. The background was cool and added a lot to the already good video content. Great as always, Leadhead.
As somebody who has felt like I was on that beach for a while, I totally get it. Keep up the good work Leadhead. I've said it before but I could listen to you talk about Half Life for hours.
got DAMN i havent checked in on your channel in a bit but last i checked you were figuring yourself out and holy shit youre slaying
I still think that Half Life 2 without the episodes had the most satisfying ending. Gordon as a silent protagonist says nothing at all about the plight of humanity and is released on Earth to do exactly what he was required to do by whoever hired Gman - just as I imagine the combine had hired him to make Earth available in Half Life One and protect it from other incursions in Opposing Force.
In the end as the citadel explodes and humanity has its moment of celebration, the individual we as the player had the most connection with (Alyx) is about to be annihilated, only for gman to pull him back away into nothingness. It shows the plot was meaningless to the flow of supply and demand as gman steps away and shuts off the light.
For me, the Vortugaunts saving him, only undemined the ending and made them less ambiguous. I liked the idea that gman showing up on the TV suggested it was them that hired him to save them from the combine, and them saving Gordon at the start of episode one was a breach of contract of a kind, which is where I thought they were going with gman's sinister incursions into Gordon's thoughts in Episode 2. Epistle 3 (and the episodes overall to a lesser extent) take that away and I think it narrowed the nihilism of the original ending to Half Life 2.
if thats true gmans an asshole but also a real one
My god your hair and glasses are so adorable, i cant even play bioshock anymore because i don't wanna hurt the leadhead splicers
i was literally just struggling with what you addressed in your conclusion yesterday. it took a 3 hour facetime call from my boyfriend to get me moving again, but this video summarizes everything beautifully! your content is always perfectly timed when i need it. thank you
Been on a spree of Half-Life lately, and this is just what I needed.
Also, another thing epistle 3 reminded me a lot about durandal's dialogue in the marathon trilogy. You seriously should check it, it is one of the hardest going stories in gaming.
Marathon goes hard
@@badbeardbill9956 The game has not aged that well, but the story indeed goes hard.
Thanks for the very nice series, I appreciate such a thoughtful video-essay. Really makes me think and appreciate stuff.
You're clearly in a much better place mentally and so much more comfortable with yourself these days. And that directly translates to more enjoyable, high quality content IMO.
Ironically being in a better place mentally doesn't equate to moving closer to self mutilation. Wtf are you even promoting?
Yes
so real
Love your stuff lead!
For your philosophy part at the very end, I think most people would say that's totally a great idea to make sure you let yourself enjoy what you make moreso than other vid ideas etc!!!
SO basically YEAH go for it
I really like your hair!
And I really love your "sitting on armchair at the end of the world" vibe!
thank you! Always love hearing your takes on half life
Was just watching your Planetscape video, checked your channel and almost squeeled with excitement to see another Half-Life video, thanks Leadhead!
Is it just me or does her unique, unnerving calm delivery make these essays about historically impactful franchises like Half Life seem even more grand and imposing? It's hard to explain it's just a feeling I get when she's laying out plots and lore.
*his
@@hello-ii5lhno their pronouns are “she/her”
@@Cybercerialdestroyer They know, they’re just being cunts. Report and move on.
@@Cybercerialdestroyer Pretty pathetic whenever someone makes a bunch of sockpuppets to say this shit right? Like, if they're gonna be a spiteful and bigoted loser then they could at least have the guts to say it on main.
@@Cybercerialdestroyer But the truth is "he/his"
I don't know if this is weird to say, but your voice is so pretty and I'm a little jealous since I've only just started training mine. I watched some of your older videos a while ago and then coming back to watch these, the difference is like night and day.
I find it horrible and its worse then when he was a guy
@@madmonty4761 I'm sorry but I'm going to have to revoke your opinion license
@@radiotomatosauce99im sorry its not natural its fucked
@@madmonty4761cope
@@madmonty4761cope
I hate how something as mundane as a TH-cam video can strike the fear of death in me, even at such a young age. At the same time, I love how something as mundane as a TH-cam video can challenge my thoughts in such a meaningful manner. All of this, coming from ideas brought from an equally mundane video game.
But it isn't mundane, because we find purpose in its own meaning that makes it significant to ourselves.
phenomenal video as always, definitely my favorite creator when it comes to game analysis (especially half life). also, you really look great on camera :)) as a pretty long time viewer, im so proud of you
I don't know why but your videos feel absolutely unique in the best way possible
Also please make them brighter I can barely see 😭😭😭
Hello Ms leadhead just wanted to say I’ve been watching your vids for the last few months I love how you’re able to breakdown and explain different aspects of games and the mindset behind them and I want to make a game one day I’ve been taking some inspiration and notes from ya . Random as this was just wanted to tell ya. I hope you’re having yourself a lovely day and a great evening:3
One thing i can rescue from the ending of epistle 3 (wich i think i commented in your video sbout human ingenuity on half life 2)is gordon's talk about the spirit of rebellion still going on is the idea of insurrection and the satisfaction comming from such as an end goal itself
This video is crazy dude,
The amazing editing
The amazing talking points and research
Half life.
11/10
This video is amazing.A perfect analysis of all things important to understanding the story of Half Life.
How did I miss this video!? Your work is amazing.
i would love this ending to the story. the beach is perfection. i love when writers give me stories where things don't work out. it is far too rare where the Main characters hopes and dreams do not happen. and i love it! we need many more like that.
also there is no good reason a main character cannot change. like with The last of Us 2.
what ever the Future was going to be for better or worse, Gorden already played his part in it. the lives he saved and ended already vastly contributed to the narrative and it is time for the next person to step up.
I disliked last of us 2.
Anyways I agree. If the series is ever concluded though, I love the idea of Freeman being taken back in time to the day of the resonance cascade. That the only way for him to defeat the combine is to make sure they can never come to earth to begin with.
I myself have been struggling with a lack of motivation and the idea that life is just meaningless. As I consider myself to be a bit of a philosopher, I believe, like some others, that there's an innate" Spark of Divinity" that rests in man, the ability and impulse to create. That Spark being caused by boredom is a fantastic way to think about it - while, yes, there isn't a meaning to life, to creating anything at all, we still do it anyway. It's rather inspiring to me, that despite the fact that there's no point, we as a species refuse to give up. Thank you, Leadhead, you've given me a lot to think about. I think with this, I can finally start pulling myself out of my rut and find my Spark of Divinity. It's so easy to give in to apathy and hopelessness, so hard to want to do anything sometimes... but nothing worth having comes easy. I believe that because life is initially meaningless, it's our very purpose to give it a meaning of our own, one that's special to and different for each individual. So here's to living, even if only to spite the fact that we have no reason to.
I sense a great amount spirit behind the keystrokes in Mark's "epistle 3" story. It's quite the statement for a writer to go that far, given at time the uncertinty of his tenure, I also love how your passion for this series hasn't changed a dime. GG excellent video (Hopefully for my favorite game I can keep that spark)
As a "much older" viewer I can only say this: You are a deep thinker for your age, must be an old soul. Tony Randall once said "Find what you love to do then kill yourself doing it!" You seem to be on the path. Just remember to have fun with it, don't take yourself too seriously, and don't over think it. Lastly, I don't think life can be boring... even after death! Love your content By The Way!
All of your content has been amazing thus far and we all understand that it is draining to make video with such an impact on such a constant basis. Nobody is expected to do that, and it is incredible you managed to do that for as long as you have. I'm excited to see what your new type of videos will be like and wish you the best with it. Keep doing what makes you happy, I (and I'm sure all your other fans) will always be here to support whatever direction you decide to take. :)
I LOVE HUMANITY'S CURSE OF CURIOSITY
I just finished my EP1 run in VR (Got One Free Bullet and Citizen Escort first try), and regarding Gorden's emotion section, that was something... interesting. During the gameplay, especially in the beginning, I found myself often gesturing or posing myself in the spots that made sense at those moments. When doing the round about on the core, I waved over to Alyx like a cheezy lunatic from a GMod video, but gave her the "Really?" look with the Zombine joke. It was... interesting.
This is probably the most underrated video i have ever seen, awesome.
Glad you made video about this! I still can't stop thinking about Epistle 3 ever since Marc released it, thinking about what happened to Gordon in the end is just haunting
You gave a uniquely new angle I can't say I have thought of the series in before. I never considered how deep the implications of nihilism were, functionally in this series.
In either case, great video as always!
It is interesting how different people interpret their own darkest days, depressions and even the meaning of nihilism, in general or for their own lives.
Reminds me of the book by Viktor Frankl 'Man's search for meaning or something' which is the basis of his logotherapy where the person searches for their own meaning in the world
i was so ready for ur bit abt not knowing how to close out this video to culminate in another half life cliffhanger lol
You really hit the nail on the head with the statement that half-life is about the feeling of nihilism, the despair in the wake of complete meaninglessness. Which is exactly why I love this game, because this feeling allows you to experience the fictional space like few other games that I have played manage to, and it made me absolutely fascinated with this series. I remember that all through my playthroughs of the various games I always felt like no matter what I do and how many enemies I kill and objectives complete, this doesn't matter, I will lose either way.
Great video as always, keep up the good work!
I would also like to add, the name Alyx quite literally means defender of Humanity.
Alyx believes in eternal suffering for sins and Gordon doesn't, yet he suffers regardless. It all wraps around to big J. Gordon isn't able to continue the canon because he knows good from evil and that defeats the purpose of an allegory.
i really enjoyed this video. i never read epistle 3 myself, so hearing this unfinished part of the story was very fascinating
i wonder if mark wrote g-man abandoning gordon for alex because, shortly before his departure, valve abandoned his story about gordon for a prequel about alex. just paranoid speculation, but given marks real life retirement to a beachy island potentially being represented as gordon inadvertently retiring to an alien beach, i believe there is a non-zero percent chance that this may be true.
I mean, I don't hope thats the case. To each their own, but to me this is a very cheap kind of symbolism that I'd trust that writers for HL would be above
The Beach Gordon was placed on was definitely on Earth. The Vortigaunts didnt throw him to nowhere, the reason why Gordon refers to his old friends and the resistance being dead and gone, is because the effects of the Borealis and the Vortigaunts teleported him far into the future of Earth. Weather the Resistance won or lost, it happened without him. Its also a Meta reference to the fact that Mark Laidlaw was unable to finish the Half Life Story, it happened without him. "Old friends silenced or fallen by the wayside - but i still feel the spirit of resistance is alive - expect no further correspondance from me, this is my final episode." - he is telling the Half Life Community to make Episode 3 through Modding, he could never do it in an official capacity anymore.
There is a Canon ray of hope, however, all signs point to Portal 2 taking place far in Humanitys future, maybe around the same time Gordon returns. The first thing Chells sees on the surface of Earth is a Wheat Field...Wheat grows with Water, the Combine was draining Water from Earth. The fact that Wheat is still growing shows that, at the very least, the Combines goals were not achieved.
These videos will always be there to give what they always gave even if youtube is completely chaotic and unrecognizable
I'm so sincerely thankful for your videos
Leadhead🤝half life
Looks like Gordon will join Ico and Shinji on “that beach”.
Always a pleasure to watch and listen. ❤
6:20 that part tho. Always has given me chills; almost i shudder as you spoken about the Combine and there dyson sphere, how exactly as you say wouldn't barley register as a blip to them out most powerful weapon. Its truly fascinating to me 😁
I’m happily looking forward to whatever you make next.
The Half life series is as close as we'll get to a video game adaptation of the myth of sisyphus.
You're a unique and incredible person. I am glad you're with us, I hope you're feeling better. Take care!
You're missing one crucial detail for why we choose to persevere as a species. Purpose. In my eyes, you have two primary objectives as a living, breathing creature.
1. Reproduce and pass on your genes.
2. Make a better world for your descendants to inhabit.
Almost every positive task in life can be boiled down to either objective 1 or 2. It's a very reductionistic and simple way to look at things, but it has kept me going through tough times.
I'm agnostic, but I admire the Abrahamic religious view of everyone having a purpose in life. Most people choose to persevere and succeed for their future children's success. Not everyone can have children, but they should then double down on objective 2, which is to make the world a better place.
With the Combine's suppression field, they have effectively destroyed one of our main objectives, reproduction. That is why they are such an impactful villain. By stripping away one of our prime directives, they tear at the core of every human's conscience, making them dread the idea that they are the last of their species with no chance to pass on their genes. This gives humanity a burning desire to crush the combine, because the desire to reproduce is hardwired into our minds. Those that cooperate with the combine are nihilistic and are essentially crabs in a bucket, grabbing and pulling down anyone who tries to escape their low situation. They are a net negative to the success of the human species.
I agree with almost everything you said. However: siding with the combine is not necessarily nihilistic. In fact, I would call it logical, if anything.
There's an even more important and general objective that all intelligent life must share to ensure its own long-term survival: Ensure the survival and progress of intelligent life, be it your own species or others.
That is, humans siding with the Combine may view their actions as beneficial to the survival and progress of intelligent life, as they are beneficial to the survival and progress of Combine life. Of course the overwhelming majority of Combine-supporters are ignorant, nihilistic or stupid, but let's not ignore the intelligent minority.
@@toomanycharacter Siding with the combine is anti human. I don't give a fuck if another intelligent species exists, I will always be fighting for humanity. You abandon your kin if you side with anyone else.
hehe your voice sounds really nice ❤️ very inspiring!
I've been waiting patiently for this video
Leadhead is eating tonight!!
somehow I've never read epistle 3 before this video but dear god there would have been actual riots if episode 3 ended like that.
Nihilism and humanity don't mix well. For all the grungy and dark cyberpunk worlds, and totalitarian Orwellian societies the human spirit can dream up we want to be positive. A ray of sunshine cutting through the smog of concrete monoliths, warming the petals of a flower growing out of the cracks.
We as a species can't help but look at the silver lining.
As a side note on your message on the end: I found your content not to long ago and frankly love the channel! Do what you want to do- its not the topic on hand that matters, but the way you execute investigating and extrapolating upon the subject. Its your style that matters. So long as you stay true to the way *you* make them, then I, and assuredly others, will be more than happy to watch ad Infinium.
That conclusion sums up why I take a pinch of hope from HL2 and Episode One, even in the rubble of City 17
A cold, uncaring world wouldn't need to fight opposition, it wouldn't feel the need to preserve itself, it wouldn't invite efficiency like it wouldn't invite art, the uncaring universe doesn't care about itself, do not comply to such words, it's not what you mean to the universe, it's what the universe means to *you.*
People say Gordon is a blank slate, but I disagree. I'll describe my interpretation of him from the games:
Gordon Freeman is a certified genius, but down to Earth, to the point of being reckless. He's late, races Barney to get into Kliener's office for fun, has a ponytail potentially, and even ruined his coworkers lunch, just for the lulz. He's very unpretentious. He also has a decent, yet questionable moral compass. Upon causing the resonance cascade, Gordon had many opportunities to escape the facility and run away, but risked his like to try and undo the disaster he felt guilt for being part of. He didn't have to go to Xen, but he chose to. Gordon seems to be very anti-authoritarian, and rebellious. I find it especially noteworthy that he didn't have any qualms about killing US Marines, when it was apparent they were going to kill the science team. I think Gordon knew during Black Mesa, that the BEST case scenario for him after the disaster, was getting life in prison for all the murders he committed, sometimes not even in self defense. G-Man's ultimatum was essentially his only way out logically. He certainly had some affinity for guns and weapons, before the disaster, judging by his aptitude with them upon the Black Mesa Incident. I think Gordon might even be a borderline psychopath, from the amount of mayhem, death and destruction he causes, and seems relatively unaffected by. I feel that Gordon is the kind of person that might have eventually gone postal, but instead he funneled those aggressive tendencies to helping Humanity fight off alien threats.That's not to say Gordon doesn't have empathy and deeply care for his friends though. I think that's WHY he does the things he does. I think it's clear he genuinely cares for Alyx, Kliener, Eli, and Barney.
TL:DR Gordon is a psychopathic genius who uses his deranged aggression for good.
I think a lot of that is you being projected onto the player, for example Gordon Freeman doesn't make the choice to fight marines, the player does. Same with the microwave casserole.
@@user9267 Canonically Gordon destroyed Magnusson's casserole, and I'd say Gordon killing the HECU soldiers is also 100% canon, as other soldiers comment on it
@@DrHotelMario
Oh yeah you're right about the casserole but the first kill could happen in self defense
Well damn. I was just looking to refresh myself on Epistle 3, and here we are. Pretty wild we never got this, huh?
12:24 I never noticed that Eli looks smug when Alyx spits on Breen
The vortigunts kidnaping gordon makes no sense
The vortiguns admire gordon as not only a hero who saved humanity and their race but as an equal
Like in ep2 when one says gordon has qualities that were though to be exclusive to the vortgunts
Putting him in an island because he isnt usefull for them anymore makes no sense because they were never using him they were brother in arms
I prefer a variant of the ending where Gordon was teleported back to Resonance Cascade before it happened. That the only way to stop the combine is to make sure they could never come here to begin with
Yknow, since you talked about all that stuff about monotomy and/or boredom and etc. near the end, i wonder, could that apply to entropy zero?
Another fantastic video. Love the Borealis background, that's a great touch. And your voice sounds great!
19:21 you daid it best. He's burnt out. How do you make something better than something that is already so great? Break time he said.
Good video.
However I strongly disagree on the way you described Gordon as a doomguy like character who reacts based on what he sees and I think you misunderstood what Gordon supposed to be
Gordon is meant to be the player,You. he is basically the player entity in the game world and that's i believe to be one of the reasons valve adapted this immersive environmental storytelling
The way "Gordon freeman" reacts in the game world is basically your reaction,if you felt frustrated when alyx kissed the Vortigaunt before you or you laughed on the "oh my God we're doomed" scientists
And i believe the reason many people didn't like epistle 3 ending because it made the player who was depicted as the most badass and powerful dude in the game world feels worthless, it made you feel worthless and what's worser the fact you were replaced by the one you trusted and liked the most and not only that but she never looks back at you leaving you all lonely.
Unlike alyx vance who is already written character,for the game world her story already happened and her reactions and skill/experience will never changes if the devs never wanted to
However Gordon freeman is you,your and any player reaction may varies not giving the same outcome,your skill and experience always increaseing and most important, the events won't move if you don't move it.
The ending on the shores is basically a way from marc telling the player that his story in this world ended and he no more needed and the way epistle 3 been written from freeman perspective is the way the writer wanted you to feel not actual character development or something.
Perhaps how great HLA was by Giving a freedom to the player in the world by not forcing him to look in certain direction and things like that it still lacked the feeling that you are the one in the events that older half life games did and I totally find it good.
I also believe also that's the reason people want corporal Shephard to return,he is also one the players entities in the game world who ended up like the shores ending
this was a banger
LEADHEAD RELEASED A NEW HALF-LIFE VIDEO LET'S FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
I will always welcome another HL video🥳 why didn’t this hit my sub inbox?!?!
NEW LEADHEAD UPLOAD LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOOOO
Thank you for making this. Ive been lookin foreward to it since the end of the Alyx video. Epistle 3 is so special and your analysis are always wonderful. and im just a huge fan of half life.
A few thoughts. First, thank you for your wonderful explorations of the Half-Life universe. As a long-time fan of the games, these were a treat to listen to. Next, I feel like the answer to the nihilism present in the games is for everyone to read more Camus. Finally, I want to believe that Epistle 3 ends where Dear Esther begins. And I'm upset that I'll never see an Epistle 3 mod for that game.
Great video, and nice socks :p
I'd really love to see your interpretation of the Southern Reach Trilogy, this video really reminded me a lot of it
I would love to see a video by you of Hunt Down the Freeman, because if it wasnt for the shitty gameplay, story and other, it would be a really good Half Life Fan Game with a kinda of Metal Gear vibe.
I regret watching this because it genuinely makes me question existence
Damn i love ur glasses
Yooooo new leadhead video :3
"The world isnt made out of words"