How to Respond When Someone Abuses You ? - Sadhguru | Deal With insults | Sadhguru Jaggi Vasudev
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 26 ก.ย. 2024
- In This Video a Law Student Asked Question To Sadhguru. When Someone Abuse Us. How To Give Them Reply? Sadhguru Aka Jaggi Vasudev Gave Him Answer In Wise And Perfect Manner.
We often encounter certain Situations in life when people do insult us purposefully. But we think to much about it and then we almost spoil our entire day thinking about it.
So is it the right way of dealing with insults ?
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How to respond when someone Insults & Hurts your Feelings, How to respond to someone that insults u , How to Respond When Someone Abuses You ? - Sadhguru | Deal With insults | Dealing With Toxic People | Sadhguru Jaggi Vasudev
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Anger is a very hard emotion to control. Specially after being abused for many years.
Anger is easy to control
Don't control it become one with it
you don't need to control it, you need to become more aware in the moment and you will not react with anger you can choose to walk away, not respond, respond violently or do whatever it is needed or whatever you choose but willingly not as a subconscious reaction based on passed memory of abuse.
My abuse started from childhood and now 33 I'm free from it and nothing they did can't stop me from being a loving person. God has kept me. 🙏🏽💜❤️💜🙏🏽🙏🏽 1luv to all
Hi💕, hope you’re having a good day, I hope you don’t mind me spreading the gospel with you, so here it goes just wanted you to know that God loves you and wants you to experience peace and life in a better way and eternally.But bc we disobey God and go our own sinful ways we r separated from Him,but Jesus Christ lived a perfect life for you & died on the cross and rose from the grave for you,He paid the penalty for our sins and bridged the gap between God and us so if you trust Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior and receive Him by personal invitation you receive that free gift and eternal life, have a blessed day, byee💕
No contact with abusers is only solution.
I believe that we cannot avoid abusive people in general, as so many people are not able to properly process their emotions, they don't know how, so we must be a good example all the time for ourselves and for others. Yes, often times you have to not allow yourself to be around an abusive person, when there's a pattern of abuse and when it's severe, as being around it all the time is not healthy, but every situation is different, there are extreme situations that a person must avoid, but most people cannot escape an abusive person, so isolating yourself is not the answer.
@@SydMountaineer when you can’t avoid them you have to outsmart them and call them out on their bullshit the first chance you get
What if the a user is your boss? What if your living requires taking abuse? Is that fair? Is that good? What is that gurus advice for that?
@@ms.annthrope415 That is a very good question. Anyone?
@@ms.annthrope415 It would be wise to take planned risks and find something else to do with your life that brings you joy and love within yourself. Nothing is worth your well being and peace of mind; less you spread the lack of such things to those you surround yourself with by becoming a part of the behavioral cycles of others. Deject toxicity. You will survive the losses; even if you must start from nothing. It is the inner battles when confronted and overcome that yield the greatest results. Get out of your own way. Transform without corruption. When you do you will be even stronger for the victory.
It's very hard to accept misbehavior for one who is behaves well with others.
Yes absolutely,in that situation what to do for keep ourself calm and handle our anger????
Today someone abuse me and I feel deeply hurt because I treat everyone well and my mind continually think .
I don't mean that we need stay quite while getting abused but stay calm and deal properly .ignoring is best but sorting it matters most
I have recently done inner engineering..and I am noticing dramatic changes in me..I love you so much Sadhguru..pranam and namaskaram♥️🙇♀️🙏
See lord krishna... he tried creating pleasantness all around him.
Yet he met will all kinds of terrible people. Yet he never kept resentment.
Thats why virndavan is his favourite place because everyone was pleasant and everyone was cooperative and life was like beautiful dream.
🙏 jay sri krishna
Hare krishna 💖
he was god. nothing is impossible for him .
The best thing in me is, whenever anyone tries to attack me or just insult me indirectly,I spontaneously counter them with my words . 😎😎
How do you do it
Not a solution always 😐
@@thesigma3779 true
That's a solution right there.
How pls do say fee things u say
I felt so better after a frn of mine hurt me , why should I feel bad when I am not responsible ..
I was so disturbed that someone abused me with vulgar words without knowing me such a cheap person but what uh said I learnt I'm not what he said its his upbringing.I should not worry about that its not my fault thats what his parents taught him I can feel peace now thank you 😌
@@letswatch2268 Buddy you are not alone.
I too have faced this issue. Karma will hit them back.
@@cheguevara380 Same isi problem ko mae bhi face kr rha hu pichle 3 saal se .
I always seek his teachings whenever I'm in doubt. Pranam guru on this guru purnima.
This is tough for me. I feel sometimes people bully me because my disposition is peaceful, I’m not a big guy and what I look like (racists). I am good at deescalating and calming them down but afterwards I get really angry at myself for not retaliating. Thanks for this advice
@craigsilver9,
Anger is just emotion. It passes if you don't feed it.
Pick up a book, go for a walk, and it will pass in 10 minutes.
Contemplating retaliation is dwelling on hateful thoughts (emotion filled thoughts).
You can choose to indulge those thoughts, or to focus on something else.
Not always easy, especially if the bad behavior is directed at you.
It gets easier with practice.
Remember what Sadhguru said,
"If someone is unpleasant, first try love, and then compassion. If that doesn't work....distance."
Sadhguru is correct; by avoiding those who are unpleasant, we eliminate the problem.
I'm learning this, too.
You're not alone.
🌱🌞🌱
SG with a rich vocabulary using the perfect words to express his thoughts.Positive thinking, Fluency in thoughts and Clarity expressions are his hall mark.We are underestimating this person।
The Sadhgru has spoken!
I love him so much. Such a sagacious man who helped me come to the initial acceptance of my mother's demise, and many more things.
Simple these is the way you react is that matter,if you don't react n respond they keep on abusing you and one in long run you will become depressed,and if you take a stand and give it back these will stop them.
Your rt..
When someone control his anger ,,, it gives opportunities to others in repeating their conduct again ...
When someone doesn't control it , it leads to violence ,,,
If someone hold it ,, it makes him full with feelings of recentment ...
And people are idiotically divided in 2 advicing groups ,,,
Control The anger
And don't control the anger
Same my classmates don't respond to me in better way even though I try to help in academics and many other things like career but still they are selective and always let me down i don't know whether to get angry or ignore move on but one things which hurts me the most is their way they use their body language and words it sucks 🤦♂️
This is just a wonderful piece of advice I have ever received. I need to listen to it too many times to get it internalized.
thanks sadhguru :)
Why he never give straight answer. And his answer we're never on point. The boy asked very correct question.
Where should we draw a line?
And when we need to feel like forgiving and ignore.
See every situation is not forgiving sometimes some people just cross the line and their should be some one to stop but not ignore.
Sadguru gave us very impractical answer. World dosent work like that. If we work like that the evil will do what ever they want ,thinking that oposite person will always choose peace over conflict. He or she have no guts to criticize us. And they the evil minded people will never stop.
So yaa we need to draw a line. Not just ignore . Ignore = peace= by sadguru. A Big NO..
Why according to him it's just us not them ? According to him problem is us not them.
Impractical answer 4th time I witnessed
Great point, since his half answer can be frustrating. I just shared 2 expanded perspectives-one as a comment, and the other as a reply to another’s recent comment-if you feel like checking them out. 😉
He hasn't met my mother(((
Loving yourself is the greatest love of all.Whintey Houston's spirit in the house! If it isn't pleasant I dont want to be around.Be aware of your environment and people engeries they put out!! Separate yourself!!🎶🎶💃💯👸🙏💞💞Words ate poisoned!!
Yes go no contact separate yourself
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👉Death; An Inside Story: A book for all those who shall die : amzn.to/3fvSKqd
Cooperation? how can i co-operative with group of people who used to insult me and enjoying . I think one should reply them atleast once. Otherwise they will start thinking that you are weak. Not waste so much energy but atleast for our self respect.
So true
i always avoid such people and never retort them , seeing my calm they get over their limits and everytime i am bullied . this is literally not the solution. when they are not given the return what they deserve they exploit u the next time even more badly. this is kalyug .
Thank you so much. Despite people's beliefs about how your words of wisdom are used (often by others trying to do evil by it- a failed endeavor) -I appreciate hearing it near everytime. I can only send you universal appreciation once in a while, somehow. I'm sure some of my positive energies will work warily with the universe in your favor.
Just don't let me down and let all of these bogus accusations hold weight. I understand it is their perception- and the powers that be can sway perception in either favor- but if you're true to yourself- I'll never have to hear about that.
Luck and Life
Why are the “really hard” questions never addressed? Like how victims that are actual prisoners of their abusers supposed to live in peace? These talks seem addressed to the free people with normal, everyday first world problems. 🙄
Right? Spiritual bypassing. These guys don't have all the answers. Best to look for help from people who work with trauma and abuse
You can still feel love when someone is abusive to you, right? You can still see the beauty that's in your child or sibling, when someone's abusing you, right? Those things are joy, too. He has talked about prisoners before, even literal prisoners of war, even about Nazi Germany. He's not saying that it does not hurt us, he knows it hurts our emotions, but our emotions are not the same thing as our self, our minds, and that we have the ability to not allow it to change what's inside of us. What he's saying is that no matter how badly you're treated, you have a choice about allowing it to change you inside, you can still be joyful. Yes, abuse hurts your emotions and physical body, but you have the ability to still feel joy - joy is not an emotion, it's a way of being.
Also, he understands that it's not the same for children being abused, that they have no barriers like adults do and absorb everything they witness, and he knows the psychological reasons why according to Western medicine. Abuse does change children, as their brain downloads all the bad & good information they witness up until about 11, he knows it is different for them than adults.
Very grounding, why hold on to hatred as it is so harmful
Pranaam guruji 🙏
I guess I love making a mess out of myself. I have been so abused by my family and friends. So Sadhguru I don’t have any strength anymore for choice. I am choice less and I must be choosing misery in the middle of this pandemic stuck inside insulting friends shitty relatives and just forgive them and this is how they are as far as I’m concern they can burn in hell and that’s what a month of chanting for me . Bring on the poison got to be better than this.
Why everyone is against u even ur Friends too.... how come this is true that everyone is wrong and only u are right.
Hope you are out of mess after these interactions with Sadhguru.
It gets better I have been dealing and healing from narcissistic family too. I know how you feel but anger is too heavy a burden for me to carry
Hey I had the same issue, if you need someone to talk, let me know I know how to help. Sending you lots of love ❤️
I have same palms....
This way of behaving hurts a lot people take pleasure in hurting those who don't react back but the thing is the one who has undergone all these kind off humiliation gets stronger than those bullies whose work is just hurting others . Once the person gets ahead of these bullies, these sick people are the ones who feel painfull regret angry as they no more can do the Same thing with that person
My abuser is my mom.. she keeps calling me a failure in life because I’m not earning as much as she expected. It hurts a lot. I am doing my best. God help me find peace and happiness.🙏🏻
If you can please stay far away from her go no contact that’s how mine is too. Forgive her don’t hate if resent her but go no contact.
My mom is abusing me too, she used to punch me in the face, since I was 5 years old. Now she mentally and emotionally abuses me and it’s because she is a bad person, twisted mentally and she will not stop. I only have nice days when I dont see her or communicate. Some people were raised to be evil and abusive and thats what they know they dont know compassion and kindness. Only way to live a nice life is to walk away from this evil.
God bless us all
Look up reverend wilkerson and watch his talk on the Holy Spirits oath to God it may help you all
She is doing out of love for you
@@anneagena8236❤️
I don’t know man, people get on certain drugs not only are they poisoning themselves, my opinion, that poison could lead to someone else getting killed if that’s what they really want to do. May not be fair, but people die from their killers being consumed on drugs all the time.
Yes I know I m poisoning myself but I don't have control on my mind And mai uska kuchh nhi bigad skti but still anger and hate always growing up in my mind 😭😭
Me too
It's only because the poison in you has built up from the past - it sounds like you get triggered easily - triggered emotions are caused by PAST hurts & emotions, rather than the current abuse you are experiencing, so you have to practice how to deal with the past emotions so you don't get triggered, by practicing detaching from the emotion enough to study it from a distance, look at it, see it without feeling it, and figure out what you can do about it (if anything). It's like re-wiring your brain, which takes a lot of work because it took a lot of time and abuse to cause it, but it IS possible, people are doing it everyday. Lisa A. Romano has videos here on TH-cam which are very helpful with this.
My old girlfriend's husband suddenly calling and abusing bcoz His doubt mentality he is behaving like psycho and scolding me bad words even kinda threaten by calling in the midnight it's been years since I met and talking with her but he's not even listening don't know how to handle this
Very effective 👌 i have my choice to live peacefully ❤ ur a saviors. Like 👍
I can't forget those insulting words abuse and that Bastard even for a second .And who said Karma is back and blahhh.. blahhh
I can see he is living very healthy wealthy and happy life So now I believe that God punishes innocent one like me not culprits like them 🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️
What he done to you doesn't determine whom you are 😊 .it hits back wait and watch
He will suffer ,karma comes back,wait and watch,
I have lost that hope already and karma hits back and all but thanks for your consolation ❤️
@@jarammamatha7649 Thanks for ur consolation ❤️
@@jananimahesh-rr1pp I'm already upset and feel very down constantly and stop increasing my grief
👍 My spiritual and development mentor.
I deal with Toxic people the Police and my Neighbors i would never forgive them! I don't let it bother me!
Thank you Sadguru😇 ajj ya goshtichi garj hoti mala
Thank you Sadhguru
The hostility and resentment is poison for you but that's good because it's a way for your brain to hurt yourself so you can finally avoid all contact with said abuser who caused it. Distance yourself from narcissistic abuserseven family
Is everything connected sadhguru?
Based on true incident, Yesterday i had been to a family function where one ghost aunty asked me if Iam a widower just because i dint wear a glass bangle but a couple of gold bangles. I was shocked and stuck to answer her due to my introvert nature, anyway i just ignored her there but that's haunting me still. HOW WILL I OVERCOME THIS ?
Its very well said. I am poisoning myself becausevof anger and resentment. I cannot really control my anger or emotion. I am so good if am happy but if i am stressed i am as getting crazy. I am making a lot of crazy things because of anger just to make people around me become poisoned also and the ending I am the one who've been suffering right now. Sadghuru I want to ask advice,, whose fault it is if my boyfriend hitted me because i became very mean or verbally abusive towards him because i am so stressed and having a lot of personal problems but although of that he suported me all the way but because, i am provoking him because of my vebal abusive words, i was shocked that he slapped me badly. And for me its unforgivable.
he bitch slapped you
Yes,am the who behave well with others..today am very hurted,someone talk with me very rudely and I don't liked that..but I haven't replied a single word..am so introvert.. can't even stand for myself..this is very shameful for..how I deal with this....whole day was like....😔😔😔
I love listening to you for hrs. U r father figure or Mahatma to me.
They know anger, resentment. They are doing what they are good at .😀👍🏻
after3 min 👍🏻👍🏻
This video clip does NOT completely answer the student’s question. If one is HABITUALLY ABUSED by another-regardless of the type of relationship-one must BOLDLY choose to develop or maintain healthy boundaries (part of Self-Love). For example, I chose to leave HABITUALLY (KEYWORD) abusive relationships.
We can unconditionally forgive others, but that doesn’t mean that we need to allow others to continually cross our boundaries.
Plus, we can forgive another AND let them go (which is doing a great favor for BOTH parties). Because allowing the abuser to continue abusing, is enabling them to continue their unloving and unhealthy ways.
NO ONE deserves to be another’s punching bag (physically, mentally, emotionally, and/or spiritually).
Unconditional Love is for BOTH self and others, NOT just others.
If we don’t respect ourselves enough to stand up for ourselves, we cannot expect others to respect us.
YES, I highly resonate with Sadhguru’s teachings to Master our inner world; however COMMA this includes SELF-LOVE, protecting our inner child from toxic relationships and environments.
Many times i am being insulted by my neighbour at marriage gathering
Try to ignore, otherwise you can him/her answer in the same language
I don't understand some one please explain this
So let people treat you badly and be happy about it is the message i got from this advice.......
-Try to cooperate with ppl, do your best!
-if its not working just choose joy over anxiety and anger
-Be joyful no matter what, when u get angry u are poisoning only yourself not others so it doesnt make any sense
@@ania980 thank you so much! Brother..!
@@jbenno7021 thank you so much brother..!
Nice ❤️
When people are try to insult me I look confused and say “Who, Me?” Then I erupt into laughter 😂😂😂
Okk.
What if someone is abusing someone else in front of you? You just stare and do nothing?
I’ve been following my inner guidance/Heart/Intuition for over four decades, and standing up for others who were mistreated, who weren’t able to themselves.
It’s not about looking for such moments, but when such moments show up, TRUSTING how you FEEL from within, and having the courage to do what’s needed.
I’ve also been thanked by some people, even strangers, who were afraid to stand up for themselves.
So for me, regardless of who says what (within outer world), it’s COMPLETELY WORTH SHARING THIS FORM OF UNCONDITIONAL LOVE.
How does one know when someone is a control freak?
I was walking in night going toward gas station where I can charge my phone something came out no where in start biting me on my left side my belly seems like it eating my liver and I survive once I end up in hospital
Mine is love marriage ... How much ever I adjust n calm, my inlaws abuseing me always ... 10 years marriage life completed but stil my inlaws abusing me for other cast n abusing me for everywork ...I never opened my mouth n not having courage also ... N now they started abusing my son also he is small boy 9 years old ... My husband not supporting for us .. he is always safe stay away ... ... Now of days due to this m going depression ... Do no how to comeout from this ... Not having dare also to speak out ... Do no how to comeout of this n what to do .
Ask god for help from your heart ❤️ be brave
Please listen to bk shivani videos on TH-cam, that really helped me, bless you dear one
Watch SG videos about KARMA. Or buy and read his KARMA book. Every unconscious action we do would be recorded in unconscious memory. Next time when same situation comes up, that memory repeats the action automatically. For example, u put coffee mug in a certain style on the table, and u r unaware of that style. Next time, the style repeats, and u can break it only if u consciously put the mug on table. This is a safe example. Let's see a harsh example. Someone abused u, and u didn't like it, i.e. ur mind judged it -vely, and u felt -ve emotion (ex: anger). All this would be registered in unconscious memory. When same situation repeats next time, automatically u will feel anger. This is the concept of KARMA. Point is, tendencies would be created and stored in unconscious memory. When similar situation repeats, an impulse arises from the corresponding tendency in unconscious memory and enters into the conscious memory. Mind, due to it's inherent nature, gets pulled towards this impulse, and eventually leads to the anger emotion. So, such a friendly mechanism of mind called KARMA (i.e. make repetitive actions automatic so to reduce trouble to the body n mind), many times becomes a negative factor. Solution is simple in theory but tough to implement in practice. It's like this. There will always be a small gap between the arising of the impulse and mind getting pulled towards it. U can use ur decision making power (i.e. the intellectual / analytical / logical / rational mind / buddhi) to prevent U (i.e. ur mind) from getting pulled towards the anger impulse, and thus anger will not arise. Suppose if u fail and anger arose, anger is a -ve emotion, and if U try to be conscious of this emotion in ur body (close eyes and slowly trace the body for this emotion), and the power of consciousness will dissipate the anger emotion. This is how we break the cyclical patterns. This happens automatically when we practice meditation / dhyana yoga regularly.
@@madhukiranattivilli2321 I love your view... You have explained it very well...
@@manishaagrawal2369 Thanks! But not exactly my view. Partly learnt from Sadhguru. Partly from Eckhart Tolle. Partly from Osho. Partly from Advaita Vedanta and Bhagavadgita (Swami Sarvapriyananda). All from youtube. And mixed them to suit the context here.
It seems the concepts of karma yoga and dhyana yoga eventually increase the frequency and duration of no-mind states. It should literally mean the amount of time mind stays still with no activity increases. That's actually not true.
With more n more practice, mind becomes more n more sharp due to which mind can catch those impulses and ignore them which it used to get attracted to and act upon earlier. It feels like mind got more time but in reality mind became more sharper. Impulse shifts at rapid speed from unconscious memory into conscious memory (neuron cells of brain). It is all up to the mind to either catch+ignore an impulse or attract+react.
How do u deal with curses when I haven’t done anything to them
🙏❤😊
❤❤❤
My ears are bleeding hearing abuse throught out my whole life
Do a person has right to abuse other person?
I have the same question. Somebody ans pls
No, just leave them bro it will backfire on you
@@rohanbhuckory1297 leave them? where move to mars? they are everywhere
What does he even say, 4 bar repeat krna padhta hai tb pta chalta hai, that these are children book teachings
🕊Did Not answer his question,, Which is a legitimate question,,🌷
Answer may be: Consider your History with the person,, if historically, he or she has been a good or positive person, towards you and others,, definitely, calm down and forgive and forget (you may want to communicate your feelings with the person),,((Also when someone abuse you, all of a sudden, it may indicate that they are in trouble,, try to find out why and be helpful, if possible)).
If the abuse is, historically, coming across periodically, and expressing your feelings hasn’t helped,, then the only way is keep a distance,, (But,, for sure as our Grand Master is advising, forgive (do not harbor negative feelings towards anyone, because, there’s no ONE but You, in You, and as far as others are concerned, they have a negative or miserable life to deal with, so understand them and leave-’em alone)),,,🌷🌷🙏🕊
छिणाल सद्गांडु डर गयी 😂😂😂
💝💝💝👌🇦🇺
The answer is in the Holy Bible. ❤️ Forgive, bless them, pay evil with good, etc. Glory be to Jesus Christ, Lord and Saviour ❤️
until they cut your throat?
Bullies are weak they don't have the guts to face the person through a genuine way 🤣😂
sadguru looking at joe