“If you are afraid of scaring him off by expressing your feelings [or asking him his intentions], you aren’t scaring him off, you are DISQUALIFYING HIM!!” -Christian Carter
I suggest this guide book known as WhatHeWants9.blogspot.com to every single girl who has problems with dating and wish changes. You could change your life if you`re unhappy with it. Start with this guide. I`m happy and I attracted my Romeo also! It is not the most effective way to make every single man like you!?
@@lindaflewelling3635You nicely let him know that this isn't working for you and thus you're moving on. Why would you choose to stick around in a relationship that isn't working for both of you? There's another fish in the sea.
I'm a true believer that if a man wants to be with you, you're not going to have to question his intentions. It's understandable if asking within the first few weeks while you're in the "getting to know each other" stage, but if you're a few months in and still left wondering then that's too much of a disconnect and more importantly - a waste of time.
In fact, this one secret male obsession is the biggest key to being truly irresistible to a man... in a way that goes far beyond physical attraction. And when you know it, you’ll never struggle to keep a man interested or connected on a deep emotional level the way most women do. Thousands of women who discovered this one male desire have used it to turn hopeless situations into the life fulfilling relationships they always dreamed of. The kind of loving companionship and exciting romance that you deserve. If you want to uncover this secret male desire and find out exactly how you can use it to bring you and your man closer together than ever before… visit here ManSecretObsession5.blogspot.com
I did this. I let him know what I'm looking for, and he said he wants to think about it (relationship). I didn't like that answer, so I kindly told him that I don't think this will work out and that we should go our separate ways. THINK about it?! Hell no!....it did hurt, because I really liked that guy and it took me a minute to get over him. I don't care how much I like a guy, he's gotta like me back!
I agree..but you know how i hear guys take longer to figure stuff out, and with all those "rooms in their brain" by the time he goes from 1 room to another....well a year goes by lol!
I agree. If both of you aren't on the same page, loss him before you develop strong feelings and he doesn't. I don't want to be stuck waiting for a guy to love me back.
I had the exact same thing with my ex. He told me (through the phone!) he wants a break, he is not sure and he wants to THINK. And I was like wtf? What is there to think about?? I remained calm, teared up a little and broke up with him cuz I saw no reason to stay with him and he was like: what? You're breaking up?? Why? It took me a while to get over him and look up again. But it was totally worth it. I found out he cheated on me with his brothers ex 🤷♀️ and I'm glad to say this is not my business anymore
This is exactly what I needed to hear. The guy I’ve been seeing for two months is definitely “bread crumbing” me and I want to get some clarity even though I’ve asked him “do you see this going past casual dating” and he’s said yes. This is the strategy I need to be using. Wish me good luck 😆😆
I was seeing a guy. I felt as it was a casual relationship. I texted the guy a message of choice. He doesn’t want a serious relationship. I know what I want, need and deserves. He respected my honesty I am giving him the space to figure what he wants. I am progressing my own life the way I want to. It was interesting as I was getting some things at his place he wanted to not stop talking to me. He suggested us to be friends. I don’t play that. I told he had a chance to grow and build a friendship with me. Next! 😀 Some don’t know what they want or who they are. I want a man who knows who he is and what he wants. Boom 💥 💥 💥
Thank you for this advice! Ladies make sure you know your worth and don’t let men treat you like dirt. Make a man earn everything: holding your hand, kissing you, hugging you. It all has to be earned by the way he treats you. You are worth more than diamonds and you need to know that. Please.....HAVE HIGH STANDARDS. YOU DESERVE MORE THAN that guy who called you “pretty” just looking to get into bed with you. Know your worth :)
This weekend, I’m going on a mini vacation with a great guy I’ve been dating. The pace has been moving SO SLOW and I plan on trying these three steps with him!! I’m optimistic but even if we decide not to choose each other, there’s plenty of other great guys out there! 😇
In my experience, always when I had to ask those questions it was already shown by his hesitation that he's not interested enough, so I could have saved my time in cutting off without asking any of these questions. When a man is in love the woman never gets in a situation that she has to ask him to commit.
You are amazing coach. Your techniques have proven to be honest and I love the fact that it never entails a woma. Being deceptive or trying to trick a man. What I think you overlook is how much your words empower women and help us to be even better equipped to contribute meaningfully to a healthy and committed relationship. Keep up the good work. Women AND MEN are truly grateful for your contributions to our lives.
Awesome video! I was in this situation a few weeks ago, asked the guy and got told that even though we'd had a great couple of months he wasn't looking for anything exclusive! It sucked to be told this as we got on so well but I (and all ladies) deserve a great guy who wants to be in a relationship if thats what you want! Thanks Mat for reinforcing that every women deserves a great relationship :)
Lisa84542 Hi Lisa that exact thing happened to me. He said he isn't ready for love relationship. Then I see him back on online dating sites. BS. As women we deserve a man who treats us a priority. Nothing less
Oh that sucks! I am sorry that happened to you too. Yip the guy I mentioned above is back on the dating sites now too - what is it with some guys!? But you are right! We deserve a man that treats us as a priority! And there is someone out there, just give it time :)
I met a guy on a dating site and from the get-go he spelled out what he was looking for. We both wanted to make a connection that will hopefully lead to a more serious relationship. We’ve only started dating (about a month) and we’ve hit it off really well. We’re taking things slow at the moment but hopefully it will pick up.🤞🏽
*(1) Come from Choice (2) Ask His Intention (3) Challenge Him to Step Up* _Watch the video fully, but if you forget, this is a refresher, not a shortcut. Support youtubers by watching_
I asked him what his intentions were in the relationship after a couple of months in. He absolutely blanked me and I havent heard from him since. That spoke volumes so I'm getting through that and I shall be looking for a serious relationship with the right guy.
We been seeing each other on an off a year, I tDropped him for about three months? I told him needs to get together.. I'm not a friends with benefits girl. Mat it freaking worked, I'm finally know were he lives we spend as much time .Together its comfortable we can cuddle an Netflix, an we are making plans. For the future.. Thanks Mat...😆😆😊😊😇😇..
Favorite video yet. Not wanting to ask these questions as I’m afraid to know the answers... the questions are worded so perfectly though and I owe it to myself to find out before I’m too attached.....
I asked him about it.. his answer was: we are having good time, lets see where things goes because nobody knows the future is better not to plan and see until what label we get🙄
@@rocior7553 no way congratulations I'm in the same boat had our first day and here just wondering if there is a another, he is not clear too let's see how we go.😏
@@bluebry7498 just be patient and enjoy it the relationship , some mens are different and need more time before committing, always be nice and honest to him, showing him your feminine skills, and treat him as a husband even though he is nice, so he can give you and special place on his heart. Win his heart and he will be on his knees . It took me almost two years
This was so helpful in empowering me to cut away the wrong guy to pave the way for the right guy. Thanks so much, it gave the bravery to respect myself and expect to be treated in a way that resonates with the high value women I am.
I personally think actions speak louder than words. If you have to ask his "intentions", then he is already showing lack if interest. Women, if he is giving you his time and attention...stay in your lane. Stay confident on doing what makes you happy outside of him! He can level or fade out. Just stay confident. You a queen!!!
I been watching your videos for months. After being married 10 yrs to a man that was living a double life. Dating is difficult for me. I suffer PTSD and covert narcissist abuse syndrome. In Counseling still. Come a very long way. The guy I been seeing, I was really starting to like. But didn't seem like he knew if he wanted to step up to the plate. Took your advice. At this point, I have nothing left to lose and I'm going for great. I deserve great. I left it hanging out there for him to think on. Wanted to throw up all the way home but if he doesn't, saved me some heart ache
I did this today over texting and I feel relieved. In my case, I said that I consider myself out of the relationship because I didn't want to feel like I'm just a comvenience. He insisted that he has strong feelings for me, that we should meet up to talk about this. I don't know, I prefer to trust my intuition. I think he might havd commitment issues, but that's not my problem.
Hi Bogs, I've done ur advise esp#3 in my own words and it works.now i can hear from him the commitment to work out our relationship from here on. Thanks!
After my last relationship. I’m straight forward, I ask this question when I feel time is right and most of the time for me the guy asks me this question before I ask them. Anyways I’m more afraid to waste my time than to lose a guy.
I asked very similar questions to my partner of almost 4 yrs. He met each question with silence. IMPORTANT TIP....listen to the silence and walk away. I didn't do that and years down the line he's just told me he never lived me and was never in love with me. So ask these types of questions..and listen carefully to his response, especially if he's silent. #AvoidThePain x
Good info. I actually did those things on my own and I got a not so clear answer...it was a cop out to me... so I go by his actions which is not really up to par with what Im looking for so I am keeping my options open. We still speak and its no big deal. I am still feeling out my own wants and needs. He is not keeping my interest enough right now for me to care. I chat with other guys and we will see who sticks. Lol
This good, yes, scarcity leads to bread crumbs. I come from choice. I saw a guy for 7 months and we were not connecting and I ended it and his response was ok, take care Becky! 😳. So, it was not going anywhere. Thank you for this video.
Great video and very timely for me. This is a conversation i need to have soon. I sort of had it down how i was going to approach but this helps a lot. The key is going from a position of being okay with whatever he says and moving on if he cant give you what you need. Letting go makes room for someone new.
The thing is I did something’s love gurus will say u shouldn’t. I did it anyway and I asked him laser pointed questions since day 1. It’s 1 month in and we chat everyday. So we’ll see if he’s actually right for me
Involved with a guy who I met in a group setting. We're still in a group setting, occasionally getting together afterwards. I told him that I don't like being the secret and that it's not fun for me anymore. Since that conversation, my mood has changed and I've considered looking elsewhere. We'll see if he will step up.
Yes, I went through this explaining this to my daughter. These sports types are tough. She does go to sports, and the problem with sports is they are always practicing and at games. They're focused on sports. I simply told her I think the age is part of this. When guys get older, they're more settled. So in this case, I'm kind of at the point of having her to skip the sports types; it just never turns into anything. She'll go to game after game and nothing progresses other than her going to all of his games.
UR the best out the best I love every single word and examples U give its sooo easy and relaxing to understand the actual purpose of a relationship... Thanks and please keep sharing ur wonderful knowledge. 💙
Lol he makes these videos so personally relatable...I found myself agreeing out loud and answering back to things he was saying like we were having a genuine one on one convo haha like yep Mat you're right rofl. Great vid :)
What if you like him and he continues to just want to hang out? Do you stop hanging out? Should you continue to spend time with him? The more you spend time with him, the more you like him.
This is something I have trouble grasping. I was seeing a woman for 4 years, and we were commited, since day 1. At our relationship's end, she told me we were "just friends". For 3 of those years, we were FWB, still monogamous. The concept of "casual", doesn't make sense to me.
Awesome!! I have watched some of your videos and I think I really love them, am yet to be in any relationship but I think it will help me to build, maintain nd understand relationship more. Thanks Mat Boggs.
Isn't it the most exciting time.... the first months/years where everything is unsure and your look into each others eyes wondering where the relationship is going. The wait for the " I love you " words... If he is showing his love with actions and future projections do you really need to hear those words, do you really need to question his intentions ? Maybe it is just me, but I'd rather live in the moment, appreciate every single moment for what it is. What do you think Mathew ?
What if you get everything you want except being officially a couple - seeing each other as much as you want - going holiday together- being honest and faithful - spending time wirh his Mum etc
Long enough where you share personal stuff. If there is some emotional level where he shares his deeper parts of his life, time to ask that question cause sister, he cannot use you as girlfriend material without the commitment you deserve. :) If you wanna know more, reach to me on Instagram: @earthloveskin
So, I don’t know if you read these comments but I am kind of in this situation. The guy I’m seeing did agree to be exclusive when I asked, and when I asked about making our relationship official a few months after he said “he’s ready to settle down “ I specifically asked if he wanted a relationship with me and he said yes. So we are official now and when we actually see each other for dates (usually once or twice a week) it’s amazing, but during the week when we aren’t together it’s like pulling teeth to get him to respond to texts or answer phone calls. Will this method work to discuss this kind of issue? If so how can I bring it up?
Veronica, if dates are doing very well, you should relax... Phone and text are just YOUR way of communicating, maybe he is less into that. Im not a text person so I take sometimes to answer. Just chill back really.
This may be 3 years too late, but maybe someone finds it helpful. Maybe you guys have different needs of closeness and intimacy? Using effective and clear communication about how important it is to you that he is available to you can help you to relax if you just know he is available whenever you need to reach him. Leaving you both guessing is not helpful, and if your attempts to pull him closer don't work, you may have to state your needs clearly.
What do you do if he friend zoned you, but still flirts and wants to hang out? Do you still ask a couple months later if he has changed his mind or do you wait for him to say something?
If he friend zoned you , but flirt with you, that's misleading because let's say you sleep with him and you become even more entangled if you speak on ",where is this going" he will reply were only friends, for your heart sake leave him alone.. go where you celebrated the man who God has for you, you want how to convince him, he will pursue you consistently.
Ha, I did that yesterday but turned out he doesn't want to be in a relationship where he has to feel like he "has to" prioritise me. But really, I guess I'm better off this way. I prefer to know instead of questioning his every move and why I always have to be the one to takes the initiative.
Hi Mat... I m currently seeing / dating this guy for abt 3mths+ now... The thing is, i m noticing the sudden "change" in terms of consistency, tone n manner... Whn we r not seeing each other... But whn we do (which, like wht u said in ur video, not as frequent as most couples.. 1 to 2 wk once), there is always this engagemnt, chemistry n fun... So, i feel like i am in a limbo now, as to wht he really wants with this r'ship. I feel like having a chat with him... Cz this feeling is driving me nuts, i dont think i cud move fwd if i hv to constantly wonder wht is going on... It's very "unsettling".
Not just that.. he tells everyone in his environment about me and introduces me to all his people and shows up every day... texting all the time and so on... jeeez I feel like the biggest idiot. Haha
I'm 62 and seeing a man I get on with for first time in many years. He says he wants to see what developes.' So it's just casual right now. I don't want to waste time at my age but also it's better seeing someone nice than being alone. As I've been there for so long. What shall I do. Its only been 9 dates
Great video Mat :) needed that right now. The tips were right on. I was wondering if you could do a video on how to end those flings if ever it's not what you what. It's easy to say "oh its not what I want, bye" but I think it's a lot more complicated than that. If you have any opinion :) thanks
MagentaKia I think strength and self respect for yourself has to happen (not what he wants or doesn't want). This isn't wrong and doesn't have to be disrespectful. It's very healthy explaining what you want and being strong enough to walk away if he doesn't want the same. It's not easy at first, but believe me it gets better and the amazing self worth you will feel will outweigh yearning for a man who isn't wanting what you want. This gives you power to meet someone on your level and it will be amazing. 💜
My man always used me for money but also said that he loves me.he was never available in my need.now a days I am disconnected with him.but I miss him.what should I do.he wants to marry but in court.not in front of family.should I contact him or forget him
Forget him! Sounds like he's using you. Not a good foundation for marriage. Those are red flags. Lean into the experience of missing him, and let it give you clarity as to what you want in the next relationship in your life.
5:33 when i said that he said im not crazy to get married right now ...i feel borken then he left me and came backe during quarantine and said he missed me but I blocked him from everywhere now im happy and free and open for my mr.right
The guy I was seeing, he wouldn't tell me... no matter how up front I was, he would just say why do you want to know all the time or why is this issue is so important to me.
🌸 if a guy can get scared off easily with such a reasonable question You just got rid of a time waster, you are the lucky one 🍀 If that creep comes back after months, block his ass and move on 👍🏼 cuz that’s a player
Surprisingly the guy I've been talking to for the past almost 2 yrs has never ran & blocked me after asking him any sort of question 🙂 Guess he's a keeper huh? 🙂
I don't know. I've been with guys being way too fast. Guys that talked about moving togethed like on date 3. I enjoyed how much time my partner and me gave each other to grow into what we have now. I guess it might be because we are both introverted? So in the end it is about finding a partner that has the same... hm... pace? Because the guy talking about moving together might be the perfect partner for another women. But for me he was way to fast.
What if the guy is focusing on a career change & has been reluctant to discuss commitment bc he says he’s not in a space to worry about commitment? BUTTTTTT you’ve been dating for 9mos and he’s consistently showing up every week & stays at my house 4days/week 🙄 Yupp that’s my situation- I’d love to hear your input!
I wish I saw this video last week, I already had my 'guy'tell me he doesn't want a relationship and I hooked up with him.We dated in 2016,hit it off well, but I got spooked. Long story short, I guess its time to see other people.He wanted me at first but I wasn't secure enough,I pushed him away because I am afraid of intimacy and commitment
Or you could be like me tell them that you want more and them telling you they didn’t want casual either than being intimate with them after you build trust and the chemistry is so insane and he says let’s take a break. I can’t give you what you need and leaves you devastated and confused for two months now.
Check out this FREE texting guide: www.bravethinkinginstitute.com/love-relationships/resources/ctmc/mag/how-to-text-guys
“If you are afraid of scaring him off by expressing your feelings [or asking him his intentions], you aren’t scaring him off, you are DISQUALIFYING HIM!!” -Christian Carter
I suggest this guide book known as WhatHeWants9.blogspot.com to every single girl who has problems with dating and wish changes. You could change your life if you`re unhappy with it. Start with this guide. I`m happy and I attracted my Romeo also! It is not the most effective way to make every single man like you!?
Ok what if he keeps telling you he still wants you while still being locked up what do you say to that ?
@@lindaflewelling3635You nicely let him know that this isn't working for you and thus you're moving on. Why would you choose to stick around in a relationship that isn't working for both of you? There's another fish in the sea.
This is so good! I like the part that you can't scare away the guy who wants a relationship. Great video.
Good Morning Baby
I have ☕
I'm a true believer that if a man wants to be with you, you're not going to have to question his intentions. It's understandable if asking within the first few weeks while you're in the "getting to know each other" stage, but if you're a few months in and still left wondering then that's too much of a disconnect and more importantly - a waste of time.
So I did this & it did not turn into a committed relationship.
So I continue to be a single woman who owns her worth.
In fact, this one secret male obsession is the biggest key to being truly irresistible to a man... in a way that goes far beyond physical attraction. And when you know it, you’ll never struggle to keep a man interested or connected on a deep emotional level the way most women do. Thousands of women who discovered this one male desire have used it to turn hopeless situations into the life fulfilling relationships they always dreamed of. The kind of loving companionship and exciting romance that you deserve. If you want to uncover this secret male desire and find out exactly how you can use it to bring you and your man closer together than ever before… visit here ManSecretObsession5.blogspot.com
Yeah, this guy was just throwing out ideas he has. These weren't scripts that were tested hundreds of times by women that were generating success.
Yes Guru...don't tell nonsense..If a man is really interested in a woman he will do anything to be with her..
1-come from choice
2-ask his intention
3-challenge him to step up
Thank you for providing actual content. So many coaches just give one long advertisement for their services. I really appreciate it!
I did this. I let him know what I'm looking for, and he said he wants to think about it (relationship). I didn't like that answer, so I kindly told him that I don't think this will work out and that we should go our separate ways. THINK about it?! Hell no!....it did hurt, because I really liked that guy and it took me a minute to get over him. I don't care how much I like a guy, he's gotta like me back!
I agree..but you know how i hear guys take longer to figure stuff out, and with all those "rooms in their brain" by the time he goes from 1 room to another....well a year goes by lol!
I agree. If both of you aren't on the same page, loss him before you develop strong feelings and he doesn't. I don't want to be stuck waiting for a guy to love me back.
I had the exact same thing with my ex. He told me (through the phone!) he wants a break, he is not sure and he wants to THINK.
And I was like wtf? What is there to think about?? I remained calm, teared up a little and broke up with him cuz I saw no reason to stay with him and he was like: what? You're breaking up?? Why?
It took me a while to get over him and look up again. But it was totally worth it. I found out he cheated on me with his brothers ex 🤷♀️ and I'm glad to say this is not my business anymore
you sound desperate. throwing expectation at a man is not going to get you a man lol
This is exactly what I needed to hear. The guy I’ve been seeing for two months is definitely “bread crumbing” me and I want to get some clarity even though I’ve asked him “do you see this going past casual dating” and he’s said yes. This is the strategy I need to be using. Wish me good luck 😆😆
One step ahead of you. Did this last month and found out i was just a fwb with him. Dumped him so fast, it made his head spin
Debbie M. FWB? What does that mean
fwb is a friends with benefits.
+Debbie Hahahahahahahaha! I could sense his head spin
I was seeing a guy. I felt as it was a casual relationship. I texted the guy a message of choice. He doesn’t want a serious relationship. I know what I want, need and deserves. He respected my honesty I am giving him the space to figure what he wants. I am progressing my own life the way I want to. It was interesting as I was getting some things at his place he wanted to not stop talking to me. He suggested us to be friends. I don’t play that. I told he had a chance to grow and build a friendship with me. Next! 😀 Some don’t know what they want or who they are. I want a man who knows who he is and what he wants. Boom 💥 💥 💥
Yes girl!!
Thank you for this advice! Ladies make sure you know your worth and don’t let men treat you like dirt. Make a man earn everything: holding your hand, kissing you, hugging you. It all has to be earned by the way he treats you. You are worth more than diamonds and you need to know that. Please.....HAVE HIGH STANDARDS. YOU DESERVE MORE THAN that guy who called you “pretty” just looking to get into bed with you. Know your worth :)
This weekend, I’m going on a mini vacation with a great guy I’ve been dating. The pace has been moving SO SLOW and I plan on trying these three steps with him!! I’m optimistic but even if we decide not to choose each other, there’s plenty of other great guys out there! 😇
In my experience, always when I had to ask those questions it was already shown by his hesitation that he's not interested enough, so I could have saved my time in cutting off without asking any of these questions. When a man is in love the woman never gets in a situation that she has to ask him to commit.
So true!
So true action speaks more than words...
So true !!!
Yes 😀
You are amazing coach. Your techniques have proven to be honest and I love the fact that it never entails a woma. Being deceptive or trying to trick a man. What I think you overlook is how much your words empower women and help us to be even better equipped to contribute meaningfully to a healthy and committed relationship. Keep up the good work. Women AND MEN are truly grateful for your contributions to our lives.
Agreed!!!!
Awesome video! I was in this situation a few weeks ago, asked the guy and got told that even though we'd had a great couple of months he wasn't looking for anything exclusive! It sucked to be told this as we got on so well but I (and all ladies) deserve a great guy who wants to be in a relationship if thats what you want! Thanks Mat for reinforcing that every women deserves a great relationship :)
Lisa84542
Hi Lisa that exact thing happened to me. He said he isn't ready for love relationship. Then I see him back on online dating sites. BS. As women we deserve a man who treats us a priority. Nothing less
Oh that sucks! I am sorry that happened to you too. Yip the guy I mentioned above is back on the dating sites now too - what is it with some guys!? But you are right! We deserve a man that treats us as a priority! And there is someone out there, just give it time :)
He did you an awesome favor by being honest.
Totally his loss.
Exactly...and I'd rather get the truth now....than eat a lie all my life
I met a guy on a dating site and from the get-go he spelled out what he was looking for. We both wanted to make a connection that will hopefully lead to a more serious relationship. We’ve only started dating (about a month) and we’ve hit it off really well. We’re taking things slow at the moment but hopefully it will pick up.🤞🏽
How did it go?? like i am in same exact situation !!!
Me too 👀
Are you still together?
@@MaryTheresa1986 no, but I’m with someone else. It takes time. Just go with your gut and if it feels right, then go for it! Good luck!
@@Mish4Mello I've been with my husband 13 years this month, and it's been great! 😊😊
I’m so tired of women having to “convince” men to be with them, like WTF they can go their own way bye
Yeah... if a man wants to comit to you he will... my man sure did and i was even ok with us just being casual.
That’s not what he’s saying in this video. He’s saying that if you have to convince him, he’s not the one
@@n4musica Exactly 🙂
*(1) Come from Choice (2) Ask His Intention (3) Challenge Him to Step Up*
_Watch the video fully, but if you forget, this is a refresher, not a shortcut. Support youtubers by watching_
This was just what I needed to hear! Standing in my worth knowing if this person isn’t it then it’s ok there is someone that will be.
My ocd is going crazy. The shelf distance between the picture are uneven
Omg since you mentioned that it's going to really bother me lol
Haha sorry guys
GetchaaPull loll
🤣🤣🤣
IM OCD BUT NEVER NOTICED THIS....WHEN PEOPLE SPEAK LOOK AT THEIR FACE......NIT THE WALL.....
I asked him what his intentions were in the relationship after a couple of months in. He absolutely blanked me and I havent heard from him since. That spoke volumes so I'm getting through that and I shall be looking for a serious relationship with the right guy.
We been seeing each other on an off a year, I tDropped him for about three months? I told him needs to get together.. I'm not a friends with benefits girl.
Mat it freaking worked, I'm finally know were he lives we spend as much time .Together its comfortable we can cuddle an Netflix, an we are making plans.
For the future.. Thanks Mat...😆😆😊😊😇😇..
barb maki
Llp
No more scarcity mindsets we deserve better.❤️
Favorite video yet. Not wanting to ask these questions as I’m afraid to know the answers... the questions are worded so perfectly though and I owe it to myself to find out before I’m too attached.....
I asked him about it.. his answer was: we are having good time, lets see where things goes because nobody knows the future is better not to plan and see until what label we get🙄
Hahaha 😅 how was the end? I was told that exactly.
He poked the question yesterday .. 💍 💕
@@rocior7553 no way congratulations I'm in the same boat had our first day and here just wondering if there is a another, he is not clear too let's see how we go.😏
@@bluebry7498 just be patient and enjoy it the relationship , some mens are different and need more time before committing, always be nice and honest to him, showing him your feminine skills, and treat him as a husband even though he is nice, so he can give you and special place on his heart. Win his heart and he will be on his knees . It took me almost two years
@@bluebry7498 our wedding is September this year . We are excited and both family planning the wedding 👰 🙏🤵♂️
I just love your blog, that ever time I open TH-cam, you answer my question already. God Bless and stay safe.
This was so helpful in empowering me to cut away the wrong guy to pave the way for the right guy. Thanks so much, it gave the bravery to respect myself and expect to be treated in a way that resonates with the high value women I am.
This really works for me
I just got my ex back now
I can also help you bring back your relationship back now
Message me on WhatsApp now
+1 (415) 5 4 9 3 8 7 4
I personally think actions speak louder than words. If you have to ask his "intentions", then he is already showing lack if interest. Women, if he is giving you his time and attention...stay in your lane. Stay confident on doing what makes you happy outside of him! He can level or fade out. Just stay confident. You a queen!!!
This really works out for me
I just got my ex back now
I can also help you bring back your relationship back now
Message me on WhatsApp now
+1 (415) 5 4 9 3 8 7 4
I been watching your videos for months. After being married 10 yrs to a man that was living a double life. Dating is difficult for me. I suffer PTSD and covert narcissist abuse syndrome. In Counseling still. Come a very long way.
The guy I been seeing, I was really starting to like. But didn't seem like he knew if he wanted to step up to the plate. Took your advice. At this point, I have nothing left to lose and I'm going for great. I deserve great. I left it hanging out there for him to think on. Wanted to throw up all the way home but if he doesn't, saved me some heart ache
I did this today over texting and I feel relieved. In my case, I said that I consider myself out of the relationship because I didn't want to feel like I'm just a comvenience. He insisted that he has strong feelings for me, that we should meet up to talk about this. I don't know, I prefer to trust my intuition. I think he might havd commitment issues, but that's not my problem.
Hi Bogs, I've done ur advise esp#3 in my own words and it works.now i can hear from him the commitment to work out our relationship from here on.
Thanks!
After my last relationship. I’m straight forward, I ask this question when I feel time is right and most of the time for me the guy asks me this question before I ask them. Anyways I’m more afraid to waste my time than to lose a guy.
I have come to learn that too, I don't like wasting time
Thanks Mat, that’s what happened to me very recently and I found out he’s not interested. Cheers! 👍💅🏻💞 next!!!
I asked very similar questions to my partner of almost 4 yrs.
He met each question with silence.
IMPORTANT TIP....listen to the silence and walk away.
I didn't do that and years down the line he's just told me he never lived me and was never in love with me.
So ask these types of questions..and listen carefully to his response, especially if he's silent.
#AvoidThePain x
Wow 4 years! That must've been difficult to swallow!
Good info. I actually did those things on my own and I got a not so clear answer...it was a cop out to me... so I go by his actions which is not really up to par with what Im looking for so I am keeping my options open. We still speak and its no big deal. I am still feeling out my own wants and needs. He is not keeping my interest enough right now for me to care. I chat with other guys and we will see who sticks. Lol
This good, yes, scarcity leads to bread crumbs. I come from choice. I saw a guy for 7 months and we were not connecting and I ended it and his response was ok, take care Becky! 😳. So, it was not going anywhere. Thank you for this video.
Great video and very timely for me. This is a conversation i need to have soon. I sort of had it down how i was going to approach but this helps a lot. The key is going from a position of being okay with whatever he says and moving on if he cant give you what you need. Letting go makes room for someone new.
I'd love to see some videos from you Mat on people already in a relationship, that they're not sure is the right one. x
This video is awesome! The bloopers are hilarious! 😂 I definitely needed this today. Awesome content. The 3 strategies are right on point.
The thing is I did something’s love gurus will say u shouldn’t. I did it anyway and I asked him laser pointed questions since day 1. It’s 1 month in and we chat everyday. So we’ll see if he’s actually right for me
Appreciate you’re insides. Love the breadcrumbs! Definitely time for me to ask this question!
i love❤ that "what is your intention with us"? 👍🏼 🌻☺👏
Involved with a guy who I met in a group setting. We're still in a group setting, occasionally getting together afterwards. I told him that I don't like being the secret and that it's not fun for me anymore. Since that conversation, my mood has changed and I've considered looking elsewhere. We'll see if he will step up.
Yes, I went through this explaining this to my daughter. These sports types are tough. She does go to sports, and the problem with sports is they are always practicing and at games. They're focused on sports. I simply told her I think the age is part of this. When guys get older, they're more settled. So in this case, I'm kind of at the point of having her to skip the sports types; it just never turns into anything. She'll go to game after game and nothing progresses other than her going to all of his games.
UR the best out the best I love every single word and examples U give its sooo easy and relaxing to understand the actual purpose of a relationship... Thanks and please keep sharing ur wonderful knowledge. 💙
Lol he makes these videos so personally relatable...I found myself agreeing out loud and answering back to things he was saying like we were having a genuine one on one convo haha like yep Mat you're right rofl. Great vid :)
Just in the right time, need to hear that now. Thank you. Step one is so true!!!
What if you like him and he continues to just want to hang out? Do you stop hanging out? Should you continue to spend time with him? The more you spend time with him, the more you like him.
This is something I have trouble grasping. I was seeing a woman for 4 years, and we were commited, since day 1. At our relationship's end, she told me we were "just friends". For 3 of those years, we were FWB, still monogamous. The concept of "casual", doesn't make sense to me.
Awesome!! I have watched some of your videos and I think I really love them, am yet to be in any relationship but I think it will help me to build, maintain nd understand relationship more. Thanks Mat Boggs.
Isn't it the most exciting time.... the first months/years where everything is unsure and your look into each others eyes wondering where the relationship is going. The wait for the " I love you " words...
If he is showing his love with actions and future projections do you really need to hear those words, do you really need to question his intentions ? Maybe it is just me, but I'd rather live in the moment, appreciate every single moment for what it is. What do you think Mathew ?
I don't care what Matthew thinks, I love it! Well said!
So true, why label it ? Live the moments is what I like the most in your comment. Well said
Huhu thank u for this comment as I'm in an exsct situation with such a good guy 🥺
I love him. He is very well rounded and gives good advice
Hey Matt, what can I do without you? I just tried this step and it worked out. We decided to try and see how things progress. Thank you.
Great video and I love the out takes! 😂
What if you get everything you want except being officially a couple - seeing each other as much as you want - going holiday together- being honest and faithful - spending time wirh his Mum etc
Great suggestions. Thank you!
How many months or weeks do you have to know the guy before talking to him about these things? This is important for me. Thanks!
Long enough where you share personal stuff. If there is some emotional level where he shares his deeper parts of his life, time to ask that question cause sister, he cannot use you as girlfriend material without the commitment you deserve. :)
If you wanna know more, reach to me on Instagram: @earthloveskin
Lita Mey Layco from the beginning ask WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING FOR .. ask from the beginning so you don’t have to wonder weeks/months later.
So, I don’t know if you read these comments but I am kind of in this situation. The guy I’m seeing did agree to be exclusive when I asked, and when I asked about making our relationship official a few months after he said “he’s ready to settle down “ I specifically asked if he wanted a relationship with me and he said yes. So we are official now and when we actually see each other for dates (usually once or twice a week) it’s amazing, but during the week when we aren’t together it’s like pulling teeth to get him to respond to texts or answer phone calls. Will this method work to discuss this kind of issue? If so how can I bring it up?
Veronica, if dates are doing very well, you should relax... Phone and text are just YOUR way of communicating, maybe he is less into that. Im not a text person so I take sometimes to answer. Just chill back really.
This may be 3 years too late, but maybe someone finds it helpful. Maybe you guys have different needs of closeness and intimacy? Using effective and clear communication about how important it is to you that he is available to you can help you to relax if you just know he is available whenever you need to reach him. Leaving you both guessing is not helpful, and if your attempts to pull him closer don't work, you may have to state your needs clearly.
Thank you so much for this... but i wanted to also ask that what advice would you give to man in this same situation
What do you do if he friend zoned you, but still flirts and wants to hang out? Do you still ask a couple months later if he has changed his mind or do you wait for him to say something?
If he friend zoned you , but flirt with you, that's misleading because let's say you sleep with him and you become even more entangled if you speak on ",where is this going" he will reply were only friends, for your heart sake leave him alone.. go where you celebrated the man who God has for you, you want how to convince him, he will pursue you consistently.
Ha, I did that yesterday but turned out he doesn't want to be in a relationship where he has to feel like he "has to" prioritise me. But really, I guess I'm better off this way. I prefer to know instead of questioning his every move and why I always have to be the one to takes the initiative.
Hi Mat... I m currently seeing / dating this guy for abt 3mths+ now... The thing is, i m noticing the sudden "change" in terms of consistency, tone n manner... Whn we r not seeing each other... But whn we do (which, like wht u said in ur video, not as frequent as most couples.. 1 to 2 wk once), there is always this engagemnt, chemistry n fun... So, i feel like i am in a limbo now, as to wht he really wants with this r'ship. I feel like having a chat with him... Cz this feeling is driving me nuts, i dont think i cud move fwd if i hv to constantly wonder wht is going on... It's very "unsettling".
What if you are in some sort long distance situationship and the distance is the biggest difficulty?
You are so awesome man! Love your reenactments!
That’s the thing this guy is giving me more than bread crumbs but still is not committed
I hear you, I don't know why they are scared of committing when they are very happy interacting with you on this intimate level... ugh
Not just that.. he tells everyone in his environment about me and introduces me to all his people and shows up every day... texting all the time and so on... jeeez I feel like the biggest idiot. Haha
this just shows each men/individual and the relationship you have with them is unique, you have to take advices like this with a grain of salt.
I'm 62 and seeing a man I get on with for first time in many years. He says he wants to see what developes.' So it's just casual right now. I don't want to waste time at my age but also it's better seeing someone nice than being alone. As I've been there for so long. What shall I do. Its only been 9 dates
Great Strategy, Great video. Haven’t tried it yet tho but its sounds positive and a good one.
Great video and much needed!! Thank you for the tips
Great video Mat :) needed that right now. The tips were right on. I was wondering if you could do a video on how to end those flings if ever it's not what you what. It's easy to say "oh its not what I want, bye" but I think it's a lot more complicated than that. If you have any opinion :) thanks
MagentaKia yes please !!!! I need this right now
MagentaKia I think strength and self respect for yourself has to happen (not what he wants or doesn't want). This isn't wrong and doesn't have to be disrespectful. It's very healthy explaining what you want and being strong enough to walk away if he doesn't want the same.
It's not easy at first, but believe me it gets better and the amazing self worth you will feel will outweigh yearning for a man who isn't wanting what you want. This gives you power to meet someone on your level and it will be amazing. 💜
My man always used me for money but also said that he loves me.he was never available in my need.now a days I am disconnected with him.but I miss him.what should I do.he wants to marry but in court.not in front of family.should I contact him or forget him
Forget him! Sounds like he's using you. Not a good foundation for marriage. Those are red flags. Lean into the experience of missing him, and let it give you clarity as to what you want in the next relationship in your life.
5:33 when i said that he said im not crazy to get married right now ...i feel borken then he left me and came backe during quarantine and said he missed me but I blocked him from everywhere now im happy and free and open for my mr.right
The guy I was seeing, he wouldn't tell me... no matter how up front I was, he would just say why do you want to know all the time or why is this issue is so important to me.
🌸 if a guy can get scared off easily with such a reasonable question
You just got rid of a time waster, you are the lucky one 🍀
If that creep comes back after months, block his ass and move on 👍🏼
cuz that’s a player
Surprisingly the guy I've been talking to for the past almost 2 yrs has never ran & blocked me after asking him any sort of question 🙂 Guess he's a keeper huh? 🙂
Thanks for the upload, it's really educative, principles en value for a good relationship
How far is acceptable to go physically before a relationship?
Thanks needed this was on my mind
This is so great! 💯 Btw can I ask these question over the phone or in person?
I love your videos!😂😂😂
Thank you so much Matt for making this video.This is exactly what i am facing with my man right now.I am going to follow what you said!
I wish there was a SUPER LIKE button for this video!!!!!!
Wow!! Thank you so much for this inspiring video. I will do this yes. Thanks, Matt~
I don't know. I've been with guys being way too fast. Guys that talked about moving togethed like on date 3. I enjoyed how much time my partner and me gave each other to grow into what we have now. I guess it might be because we are both introverted? So in the end it is about finding a partner that has the same... hm... pace? Because the guy talking about moving together might be the perfect partner for another women. But for me he was way to fast.
I did share discontent in month two and gave him 5 more months and it was not connecting and I did tell him this.
FUNNY and smart. Thanks for sharing wisdom
How long does it take to get to know each, is it too early to called each other names like my love,babe, ?
What if the guy is focusing on a career change & has been reluctant to discuss commitment bc he says he’s not in a space to worry about commitment? BUTTTTTT you’ve been dating for 9mos and he’s consistently showing up every week & stays at my house 4days/week 🙄
Yupp that’s my situation- I’d love to hear your input!
Goodstuff! Thanks
Yep. If you ask him, you'll know even if he dodges.
Sounds like something I could try, Matt. Thank you.
What if he does love me, but doesn’t want a relationship right away?
So true, is better to know the truth now than in a year time.
This is wonderful Matt
This video is exactly relatable
Very true Mat, you strategy is working.
I wish I saw this video last week, I already had my 'guy'tell me he doesn't want a relationship and I hooked up with him.We dated in 2016,hit it off well, but I got spooked. Long story short, I guess its time to see other people.He wanted me at first but I wasn't secure enough,I pushed him away because I am afraid of intimacy and commitment
When the one is attached will scares away..... the one guy seems progressing a visions.
Am looking forward to have a caring and lovely partner.
Thanks dear I am great student of yours
Or you could be like me tell them that you want more and them telling you they didn’t want casual either than being intimate with them after you build trust and the chemistry is so insane and he says let’s take a break. I can’t give you what you need and leaves you devastated and confused for two months now.