Elective Leg Amputation: How I Told My Friends (This Video!)
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 28 ก.ย. 2024
- Through message boards and amputee Facebook groups, I've had a number of people ask me how I told people that I was having an elective (not like its ever something I would want...just that it is now the best option) below the knee leg amputation. After telling my family in person, I sent out this video to everyone as well as attaching this message. The response I got was incredible and so supportive - and I'm so grateful!
Feel free to use any of this as a template for talking to people in your life if this is helpful to you!
"After months (technically 14 years) of thought, consideration, consultation, and speaking with countless specialists and people on many sides of things, I’ve decided that lower leg amputation is the best choice for my life. For those who don't know, I shattered it horseback riding 14 years ago. I can’t live in pain, on drugs, 24/7 anymore, and having it degrade and affect the rest of my joints, and any other surgery would just be prolonging the inevitable and providing me a half-life still filled with pain and restriction and more surgeries. After 10 surgeries since I was a kid attempting to piece it back together and save it, it is time, and the surgeons agree. Surgery is scheduled for Thursday, October 11th.
I’m not entirely sure how recovery will go - so if I don’t respond to messages, texts, or phone calls, it isn’t personal! ;-) Also I'm kind of overwhelmed, so if I've been absent, or if you message me and I don't reply quickly, I apologize in advance. I know this is the best decision for my life, though not the first one I’d pick in a perfect world, and am excited to figure out how to embrace all that comes with it.
A couple requests:
1. If you have gone through something like this or know someone, suggestions are definitely welcome!
2. With that said, I'd like to kindly request that no one try to convince me out of this or tell me what to do with my life. I've spent more time than I can recount considering this seriously for years, consulting specialists, and more - and I've made my decision. I know to some on the outside it may not seem like it's been "that bad", but I assure you, it has been. If I'm cutting my leg off, I promise you it's been that bad.
3. If you have any questions or want to say hi or want to come visit me when I'm back at home, I'd love to hear from you in any form! Messaging me on Facebook would be the easiest way for me to get back to messages as I come out of my drugged stupor. ;-)
My husband will definitely be updating everyone post-surgery on how everything has gone. I'll definitely let you know here as well as soon as I'm with it. ;-) Prepare for photos documenting my recovery journey (and damn it, I am going to run again! Haven’t been able to do that since I was 12…5K’s here I come), but I promise no terribly gross photos! Lol!"
WANT TO SUPPORT THIS CHANNEL?
/ jobeckwith
INSTAGRAM: / footlessjo
FACEBOOK: / footlessjo
WEBSITE: www.footlessjo.com
I had an elective hip replacement at 35 years old after 15 + years of chronic pain from hip dysplasia leading to severe arthritis. It was time. After the first surgery needed to be re-done due to surgeon error, 4 years later I'm going things I never though I could: rock climbing and wing foiling in the ocean/bay and NO daily pain in that leg!! You made a well informed choice, a risk: yes, given your level of pain and years of treatment. I'm proud of you Jo and am thinking of you still following your stroke.
I can completely relate to everyone else telling me what I should do with my life. Anyone from my command (bosses in the military) to strangers in line at the grocery store.
My story is different than yours (as everyone has their own story) but I also have been in chronic pain and living off narcotics and pain medications with no real solution. I have been fighting to have an amputation for over a year and my doctor finally agreed.
The hardest part right now is making sure I am making the right decision. I am certain 99.9% of the time that this is what is going to be best for my quality of life. But everyone once in a while, when certain comments are made, I think, well is living in a wheelchair and in chronic pain better than having an elective amputation?
Your videos help me more than you can understand. You are well spoken and have a lot of good things to say. A lot of relatable things as well. I go in for my elective transtibial amputation next Tuesday. I look forward to seeing more videos from you on your journey!
Best wishes.
How has it been?
What a strong woman! I just came across your channel today! Good on you! 💗 Looking forward to catching up on what's going on! 😀
Like your videos😄👍 By the way, you are soooo beautiful !!!😍
I VERY much wish I could temporarily experience your pain. Elective amputation is such a mind-boggling thought to me because it's almost like damn well why do you want to get rid of it BUT I'm the same one to say that if something is causing you distress in your life it should ba addressed or removed and this is what you're doing. I'm glad you came to a conclusion that you feel will be best for you and I hope you have a smooth recovery
I wish I could highlight this comment and show people - because I really appreciate it, and you've really hit on exactly it. Unless there is some serious psychological issue, our biology is programmed to very much want to keep all our limbs in tact! So the idea that someone would have a significant and nearly vital peice of themselves removed says a lot about how much pain they are living in...I would never in a million years want to live life without my leg. But I want to LIVE life, and I was in pain 24/7, taking narcotics constantly just to survive, and couldn't even walk my dogs around the block anymore without pain that made me cry (and I've been in pain most of my life, I have a really high tolerance). Its how I explained it to people who couldn't understand my decision - "I promise would never consider this unless I was in serious pain. It is honestly that bad, and I can't live like this anymore." So, I apologize for the super long response, but I just felt like your comment was really compassionate and trying to be understanding and you don't find that often, so thank you!
@@FootlessJo theres a way to pin it but I'm not sure how it's done (not any help I know, sorry) but you're welcomed for the compassionate comment! Thank YOU for bringing us into such a dramatic life event and sharing essentially all of the information surrounding it. As cliche as it sounds, it really is brave to voluntarily get rid of a LIMB. I think that everyone can become compassionate through will power, hopefully we all try to be our best selves
I completely agree.
Even momentarily being able to share the pain of someone in reality, not just as empathic pain, would make it so much easier to understand these decisions.
Even with such a shared experience it STILL would not be completely accurate as every person has different thresholds of pain experience. So what for some might be only a minor twitch, others might experience as mind-shattering pain. It is deeply dependent on our brain structure and how it deals with pain.
That is not to say, someone is wuss while the next person is tough. Not in the least.
It is just a *difference* in perception, period.
That's just like saying that you are experiencing the color red differently than me, and chastising me for it.
So if someone *experiences* chronic pain for a long time they can become very thin skinned at any comment about 'being tough'.
Most probably they simply CAN'T be tougher than they already are.
im getting both my breasts removed next year (hopefully) and im watching ur videos. i know mastectomy and amputation are very different but im still losing a part of my body, and that is going to be something i have to process even though it's going to improve my quality of life so much.
I fully understood the reason you did this as it was the best option you had left, and you might as well make a choice while you still actually had a choice. I just hope that you had a very supportive and comforting group around you at the time, because I have found that mental healing is one of the biggest parts of physical healing.
I am so sorry, Its ridiculous that you have been getting messages from people about your decision, at the end of the day it is your body, and you have chose to share your journey with us, to help other people going through or maybe going through an amputation not to get our opinion.
You're so BRAVE!!
My first thought when I saw the title was I’d rather drag my foot around and it be completely useless than voluntarily lose it. And it sounds like she would’ve done that if she could deal. I honestly can’t even imagine that being the best option so man... the pain must’ve been really bad!! Very brave and strong lady.
If the foot was only useless... I would tend to agree with you... but constant pain? No way! I'd totally make the same choice. Chronic pain is no joke.
Nice! I process better through verbal too, so I might try videos in the future.
Hey, Jo! Check out Toby Mac-scars. Cool video! Some encouragement to help lift you up
I used to listen to Toby Mac all the time when I was growing up! good reminder!
You are very brave ! I look up to you for the decisions you’ve made ! Prayers for a good an painless recovery.. xoxo
I have to tell you jo you are my favorite TH-camr on here and I don’t say that lightly!!! It used to be Brandon Walsh but not anymore!!! You actually take the time to read people’s comments and respond.. But your my favorite because your content is very deep but yet your super funny and always crack me up too keep making tons of videos!! For some that has millions of viewers you interact with everyone.. I am so glad I found your page
Looks like a really nice home you n Brian have there
I am super grateful for it! We bought it a year after we got married (so the dogs would have a backyard, to be honest! Lol!), and we love living here. Its small, but we don't need a big place!