3 Easy Hacks For Wedding Officiants To Beat Your Fear Of Wedding Ceremony Mistakes
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 7 มิ.ย. 2024
- It can be paralyzing: the fear of making a mistake while you’re officiating the ceremony and messing up the whole wedding. And why are you so worried about messing up? Because you’re a good and decent person!
After all, this is not just some solo presentation - the kind where if you tank up there it’s only on you! A wedding is all about the couple. With all the flowers and ties and grandmas and drapery, there’s this sense that it’s such an important occasion and if we screw this thing up, we’re slapping a big “fail” stamp onto the couple. It reflects on them and embarrasses them in front of all their guests. And that’s way worse than just messing up a thing for yourself.
After years of officiating hundreds of weddings, I’ve developed a hack that safeguards against the feeling that the wedding officiant has to be totally perfect and the ceremony has to be totally flawless or else the wedding is ruined. (And yes, this comes after witnessing and making my fair share of embarrassing mistakes - and learning from them.)
Go into your next ceremony with these three strategies at the ready, and you’ll be setting yourself up for a relaxed and fun-filled wedding. No matter what happens. And everyone will thank you.
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Background Photos thanks to:
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Movie Clips: Braveheart
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Dude, I just finished officiating my first wedding. I watched all of your videos probably twice through and I can’t tell you how much you helped me. Everyone congratulated on how well I did and I even let them know where I learned from.
A+ man, thank you so much again.
I wish I had this advice a month ago. I had a wedding where a large glass cylinder fell and all the decorative balls went in every direction. Hindsight - I should have said something to the effect of "All marriages should be full of surprises like this!" Unfortunately, I chuckled a bit with the guests and moved on.
Officiated my son’s wedding a couple of weeks ago. Thanks to your guidance and the confidence your videos gave me it went fantastic! So many positive comments from guests including 3 pastors who told me I handled it like a pro. Thank you!!
Am a celebrant in Scotland. Your videos have helped me project energy into every wedding I do. I rewatch some the day before, and this helps remind me of the little things that help. The pep talk to the wedding party is a game changer. Thank you for sharing. X
Fantastic advice, Mark - you're the best!
Hi Mark! Your course is exactly what I needed, and I'm setting aside time every day in the month of February to go though the materials and watch your videos. Although I'm petrified, I'm looking forward to my first ceremony, and these tips are on point! Thank you!
Once again, thank you Mark!
Wow, this is so helpful! I performed my 4th wedding back in September 2019 and while I was slightly nervous for the first 3, I had no issues. THIS one however- totally panicked right before the bride came out! It almost made me want to stop officiating all together. I felt so bad and like I really let them down, but I don't think anyone else noticed as much since they tipped me afterwards and I got some leads from it. Thank you for your videos, they are very encouraging. I think I put too much pressure on myself to know exactly everything I'm doing at ALL times!
I feel more relaxed already!
Now I'm almost looking forward to something falling over and breaking.
😆🤦♀️
Soooo glad I found you. Doing my son’s wedding in three weeks. You’ve calmed it all. Subbed!
How did you do? I officiate my brother's wedding the end of next week and I'm anxious as this is my first time! Eeeek. I'm watching every single video I can before then. Lol
Thanks so much for all of the information. Do you have any recommendations for amplification if it’s a smaller wedding with no DJ?
Just did my first one Sunday. Used a lot of you tips and everything went really smooth. Thanks for the good content.
That's awesome! Congrats - I'm so glad I could help!
Mark, this is the Best homework I’ve ever done, thank you 😎
Aw thanks for making my day! ‘Love hearing this! 👊🏻
Brilliant!!
" flowers, and grandmas, and bowties and drapery" hilarious, i love it!!
Hello, I really love your videos! I am a officiant in the state of Wisconsin. I was wondering if you would not mind doing a video on different ways to add a visual representation of the marriage into the script. Like the sand blending, the love letters in the bottle wine idea, etc. Thank you, stay awesome!
Good question. I have a bride that want a ceremony to blend two families as this is a second wedding for both bride and groom. However they do not want a sand ceremony. I'm drawing a blank here....Grrr
Such good content!
What you do if a dog barked or generally acted up during a wedding?
@@unboringwedding I was thinking about the bride and grolms dog, who is a lovebug, but might whine or bark when separated from them. Perhaps something similar to your comment?
THANK YOU MARK!!! Excellent points and steps to follow from beginning to end! Excellent suggestions on what to do if and when certain situations pop up! I have a personal rule, that I should always expect the unexpected! This video gives me what I need to nicely cure embarrassment for those involved and to maintain the proper enjoyable atmosphere! Thanks so much!!! :-)
Aaww I wish you made this video a few days sooner!
I officiated my first wedding the other day and I was scared out of my wits, i did mess up a few times but they were ok with it, thankfully it was a very small (6 people) wedding
@@unboringwedding
Lol!
Thanks, I hope the second one will be less terrifying for me.
My first was literally last minute so I'm sure that didn't help my nerves
@Traci I officiated my first wedding 2 days ago ... for my brother and his fiancee. 70+ people plus hotel staff. I messed up by not coordinating with music AND wedding coordinator together. I spoke with each individually and that was a disaster because music wasn't actually listening to me ... he is not a native English speaker. He just nodded and I assumed he had done this so many times before that I was over thinking everything. Nope! Always speak last with the wedding coordinator!!! By disaster, he started playing the processional music when I walked out to the lectern. No turning back after that! Ugh!!
Mark / Mark Allen - thank you for your videos. They are interesting and helpful. I have a business question for you. Do you send "Congrats" or "Happy Anniversary" notes to the couples you marry? It is a standard business practice but I can't find confirmation that officiants do this. I was thinking about sending a note like 1 month later. What are your thoughts on this?
I love that idea! What did you do?
Hello! My question is a bit left of centre to this video topic but any advice for being able to hold back tears as a Celebrant! I get choked up so so easily....but noone wants to see a Celebrant loosing it or crying! Help!!!!
I love 6:54 lol
The bride for my upcoming wedding is terrified that she is going to trip. She has brought it up twice now. I have tried calm her but would be good to do the pep talk on the day
Mark Allan Groleau thank you Mark. That was very helpful. Will do
What advice do you have for officiating a friend’s wedding? I know many (but not all) of the guests and some for over 20 years, so it’s a familiar group. Do you think it’s still necessary to do a pre-ceremony announcement? And if so, what tone do you take?
Good question! I officiated my brother's wedding (2 days ago) and the music started playing as I walked out to the lectern. Noooo!!! So I skipped the entire introduction since the processional followed. I just started where I would have if everything went according to MY plan. We had rehearsal and dinner at my house the previous evening so mostly everyone was aware of my particular role - as sister and FIRST-TIME officiant. So no, I skipped the pre-ceremony announcement only because I didn't want to introduce myself when bride and groom were standing in front of me. Attendees didn't notice one bit!!
i am still worrying , sat my first wedding
Ha