I never really understood why people would use a label such as "selfish knitter/crafter." You picked out and purchased the materials and supplies. You learned the skill set needed to do your craft. You are spending all of the time making things. The products of your labor, knowledge, and skills are justifiably yours. Others are selfish for assuming that what you make should be available predominantly for others to enjoy.
Some of us get a little dopamine hit while working on a project we are going to gift to a person. As I get older, though, I have really only made handmade items for people that I know will truly appreciate them and that is a very small group. Recently, a friend made the most beautiful embroidered tree skirt and donated it to a raffle for a friend in medical need and it got hundreds of dollars. Someone approached her and asked if they could commission a similar piece. She stumbled and was trying to say no. I helped by asking, “what is the true cost of the piece?” She said it was close to a couple hundred dollars of materials and too many hours of work to count. “It’s so valuable, it can only be gifted.” She took a loss to donate it but it was worth it for her friend. We need to realize the preciousness of our own talents and protect them. Keep them for yourself or give them sparingly to the most worthy.
I recently have become a selfish crafter. Especially with my yarn crafts. I am a mom to two young children so I consider making things for them part of that selfishness since I have been gifted so many handmade things for them that I felt I couldn't make then anything without being rude to others. But the 3 of us worth making things for and I no longer care what others project on to me.
Just saw your video--months after you posted it. There is nothing selfish about using your time wisely to be creative and self-nurturing. No one is going to take care of me except me. The same goes for everyone else.
This totally resonates with me! Being a runner/gym rat that also crochets for me I’m often told my hobbies are selfish too. It definitely is about the expectation of being a caregiver due to gender norms mixed with the expectation that everything we do needs to generate some form of capital.
I don’t knit, but I have started sewing again after a ten-year hiatus. I mostly want to sew for myself and sometimes my daughters. I was struck that I’ve never sewn anything for my husband of 11 years and immediately felt so guilty. It’s also amazing how anytime someone finds out I sew, they immediately suggest monetizing it. I remember my brother a long time ago saying he didn’t want to be a photographer, because he felt it would ruin his enjoyment of his hobby. I love how your video touches on alllll these disparate memories. It’s okay to sew for me. It’s okay to sew for others when I feel like it. It’s okay not to monetize my sewing. It’s a hobby. The idea of the “selfish marathoner” is so perfectly illustrative of how silly the concept of selfish handiwork even is. We don’t HAVE to sew for our families anymore. It is a gift and a joy, but when you add guilt and crippling expectations to that, it ruins the joy. Say “no” and hold on to the joy! Though, I will probably make something for my husband in the upcoming year. 😉
Es ist aber viel schwieriger, etwas für einen Mann zu nähen! Businessanzug?? Herrenhemd? Poloshirt? T-Shirt? Meiner könnte eine Workerhose gebrauchen, das ist richtig Arbeit.
This this this! I gifted a crochet lizard to a coworker for her 5 year old son, and she suggested I could sell them on Etsy. I could, sure, but that would turn my hobby into a source of stress.
To me it is selfish that people feel entitled to my time and energy. I do enjoy making knit gifts occasionally, but if someone asks me if I can make them a huge project I always let them know how much time and energy it would take. That’s something that people do with artists too, like “oh can you just draw me a picture” I think people really just don’t realize what they are asking for Also, I have not heard the term selfish embroiderer, but my mom has encouraged me to give embroidery as gifts and I have to explain to her how much time and effort energy goes into it. I think crafting and arts in general are things people think are “quick and easy” which sucks because a lot of craft really takes a lot of time and skill.
We can ask ourself, how to define altruistic ? When you sacrifice yourself for the good of somebody else, it become toxic. Life is an exchange, you lie when you say you give something without any interest. You are right when you say, I do/give it because it makes ME happy. But it must really make you happy, not because it's polite to say so. The best present you can give to the world is to love yourself (and selfish), because you let others to be free to love you or not... and so you let others to love themselves loving you or not. Love your videos, I'm proud to understand almost everything (I learn English thanks to youtube and you are one of my favorite teacher haha)
We live in a culture that demands everything we do must "make money" to have value. Total crap. True value is creating beauty, joy, and harmony in your own life. Others can't help but benefit vicariously when you're exuding joy.
I'm so glad you put this video out, it's been something I've been thinking a lot about recently too! I do a lot of gift knitting, I usually plan in the spring, buy yarn in June, and spend the next 6 months knitting only for other people, and this year it was really draining. I made 5 sweaters for gifts. Both my boyfriend and my bestie are encouraging me to make 2023 my only for me knitting year, at least until I make all my planned projects meant for me, and I finally cast on a knit meant for myself this week!
I suppose my other thought is that I usually hear 'selfish knitter' used in the context of someone pressuring you to do otherwise, and it rhetorically does a very good job of protecting your boundaries. If you say, 'I knit for myself,' you leave the door open for that to be interpreted negatively. By owning the negative interpretation, you're owning that part of the dynamic. I don't like it as a general descriptive term, but as a boundary defense, it has teeth no matter how mildly spoken. There's a value in that. Where it gets odd is when it becomes an identity.
Personally I love gift knitting but do knit for myself more because I wait until I find the right gift knit. I tell people "I want to knit something for you, and I will when I find the right pattern/yarn" or if they want something specific I tell them yes but IDK when I'll do it when I'm inspired to, and every single person that I've been willing to gift knit for has respected those things because they're wonderful people who are knit worthy. And then when I feel like it's time to knit the gift, I'm so excited and happy to do it!
I have always been a "selfish" maker. Not that I don't enjoy making things for others, I do! But I do not make unsolicited items anymore. At a minimum, I ask the person on their preferred colour, shape, ease, etc. so I know that it will fit into their life. To me, that's the *most* unselfish making. I'm also a big fan of making for barter, never for cash (that not I judge those who do it, get that bread!). Maybe that's selfish?! I love making for someone when I'm getting something in return made by their hands. Thanks for an interesting convo!
I just started learning to crochet so I have never heard that term before but I don't like it. I can see how there is an expectation on knitters and in particular women to be making items for others. Knitting for yourself should not be viewed as selfish. By creating something for yourself, you're not taking anything away from others. Any craft can take a lot of skill and time and money invested and others aren't entitled to that.
Such a great perspective! I hope I can encourage my mom with this video! Also I’m getting into crochet as a former knitter, I just want to make adorable stuffed animals for myself. There are a few people I’d make things for, but already my mom is like “crochet a blanket for your new nephew” and I’m like uhmmmm nah. She always knit things for other people, never herself. I plan to change that. Intergenerational healing through making! I love it! Thank you for this video ❤
This video is so many of the things I love about your content. I'm only halfway through and already I want to give it multiple thumbs up. P.S. it's relaxing to watch you knit
I knit for myself (and I agree that selfish is not the right word), but I have in the past made things for family members and enjoyed that experience as well. Recently, I've been teaching my sisters to knit, and I feel like that is one way that I can show my love through my craft. For Christmas this year, instead of knitting something for them, I'm buying them yarn so that they can enjoy knitting up their own projects.
This was the first video I’ve seen on your channel & I really enjoyed it. I honestly had never heard the term “selfish knitter” but I totally get it. I used to knit a lot for others & would feel very disappointed when those gifts weren’t used or appreciated & over the years I’ve really trimmed down what I knit for others. Holiday knitting in particular stresses me out at a time of year when I already feel overwhelmed. I 100% agree with you about knitting for my mental health. It is a hobby that I enjoy for many reasons & that is a big one for me. If that is considered selfish I honestly don’t care! Your comparison to a selfish marathon runner or stamp collector make me laugh out loud! What a great comparison & a silly expectation for any other hobby… I really look forward to more videos. I was knitting some socks while I watched & it felt like sitting & knitting with a friend. Thanks for the chat & happy knitting!
I have been predominantly a gift knitter. I have a large (and specially decorated) shoebox, and through out the year I usually finish many small projects and add them to the box. A lot of dish cloths as palette cleansers, socks, hats, get added to the box and then when friends or family visit I let them pick something from the box. I find gift giving occasions to be particularly stressful and prefer to just give when I see those close to me. In the last few years I have started doing more "me" projects and I really feel a sense of pride in knowing that I made certain pieces of my wardrobe, but it's also really nice to put some of this time towards me too.
There are a lot of selfish people out there who would want you to make them socks, or a hat. Why wouldn't you be able to make yourself those things, you need socks too, right? I crochet but never learned to knit, I also have other hobbies, I quilt, I do needlepoint, some years I put in a garden, I share, but not my quilting, it's too expensive to have anyone not fully appreciate that I used quality fabric or had it professionally quilted. My quilts can cost upwards of $600. plus my time. Edit: Self care is essential, good for you!!!
Thank you for bringing thus up. I HATE this word and what it stands for. Everytime I hear it or see it I cringe and get really angry. I agree with everything you say here! 😉
Although I dont knit, I'm teaching myself how to crochet and sew. I've decided to start working on a me made/upscale wardrobe by combining the two 🥰 for sure this time. Ur videos have inspired me so much. Ur so sweet, u reminnd me of my daughters. Thank you for sharing your skills and bits of yourself 🤗
There are really no people in my life who are worthy of handknits. They believe handmade=cheap. They have no idea what yarn costs. And th3 time…..hours and hours to make the project only to have it disrespected as disposable. I tired of having my feelings hurt because my peeps didn’t value my time and money.
I just found your channel and at a perfect time! My daughter-in-law I asked me to make her a sweater. I said yes and was so excited that she wanted something handmade but then I found out she wanted it to hang on a chair in her office when she was cold. I love her dearly but realized she doesn’t understand what goes into making a garment. I have finished it and will gift it to her with love but the term selfish knitter will become a big part of my vocabulary.
I cannot imagine gifting or selling everything I make! It takes way too much time and effort for me to let it out of my home! I make clothes and toys for my kids, but I still can use the toys and I mostly make them clothes because I want to make a smaller project. My kids are so little I consider making something for them basically the same as making it for myself.
Thank you for posting this video with your reflections on this topic! Only this year (in 2022) I accepted that knitting is enjoyable and beneficial for me and I want to keep doing it every day, compared to the past when I didn't allow myself to purchase yarn or spend hours on knitting, so yeah, I'm a deserving knitter not a selfish knitter :)
I personally love making for my family, since they appreciate it properly. I am trying to make more stuff to myself, but I LOVE seeing the face of someone who I've gifted something. I love gifting everything, I barely ever buy anything to myself even! But I'm trying to be more "selfish" Also I know this is an old video, but I loved it!
I think knitting falls into what might have been considered "cottage industries" for the working class and working poor. This puts it in a category with seamstresses and soapmakers, beekeepers and handymen. It additionally falls on the feminine side of the gendered division of labor. It is worth noting, too, how rare it would be to tell a male office worker who's has good fix-it skills to become an electrician, say - *even when* he might be might be getting markèdly better money abd union protections in the trades. It is telling both about class and gender expectations that women are told all the time to do for pay these modes of traditionally undervalued work, while men are not, even when the financial value of their work is higher than whatever 'serious' job they occupy. Often, people aren't suggesting it as an 'instead of' option. It's supposed to go on top of everything else, because we are the gender of holding loose ends together. But this added obligation is also supposed to make us feel liberated, because we love what we're doing so much. I should add, when it's not expected to be just another thing on top of everything else, it is often a thinly veiled assumption that women would prefer to be in the home, if they were only just making enough money domestically to make that justified. As a person for whom that is actually the case - I definitely don't represent most women.
I'm a selfish knitter and sewer. Unfortunately the people I know barely appreciate store bought gifts. I'm a slow knitter so I'd rather not waste my time making something and the person doesnt use it.
Well sweet KC , I’ve been knitting for over 40years now,I’ve knitted for my kids then family members would ask me to knit for them… and as I was getting more confident on my abilities… I started creating and selling my work… 2 months ago I was hospitalized and I asked my daughter to get me some yarns that I wanted for this time knit for myself that I designed a knitted long jacket and I wanted to wear something I had made… that I was good enough… deserving to wear one of my own creations… so I’ve started the jacket, had to frog it all lol cuz I knew that I made some errors in the beginning so now I’m halfway to the end… created a pullover…. Started it… for myself also lol… so y’a I’ve started to be selfish now 😂… always felt that I didn’t deserve to wear what I was making… I’m the same way in all my fibres crafts… crocheting sewing lace making… I’ve been working a lot on myself and now I do think that I deserve perfection that comes out of my hands lol I’ll let you know how it feels to wear one of my own creations 😊😉
10k! Woooowwwww. Well done ❤. Always love your videos. I’m so glad so many people feel the same. I’ve always prioritised gift knits but when this year’s autumn rolled round, I finally switched to being selfish!
When you mentioned knitting being woman-dominated it reminded me of a polish word used for items crafted (often from fiber like knitting, tatting, crocheting, embroidery etc): robótki. It's a diminutive of the word "robota" or "roboty" which is like "a work"/"making a thing". I've only seen robótki being used when women are doing it, like what's being produced isn't a proper THING but more of a THING-Y/a knickknack/nothing actually productive but it's never used for like a decorative thing made by a man. Makes you feel some sort of way, huh.
I don't mind gifting my sister or my mother knitting, but albeit I'm still a very new knitter so it has been nice to put less pressure on myself by making some gifts. They appreciate the gifts and it makes me happy. But I am a very selfish person at my core, so I know that now that they got those gifts these years I'm going to knit for myself this year, now that I'm finally beginning to feel happy with the finished results of what I make.
A lot of times, I knit things because I want to try, use up, or purchase a thing. I don't even have a plan, then I find someone who can use and appreciate them. Funny thing is, I don't get along very well with my dad, he kinda has a hair across or a stick up something I ain't gonna name, but when I thought about it, I knitted him a pair of wool socks for Christmas. Why? Well partly as an olive branch, but also because of the people I know, he's one I know appreciates the time invested into it. It was me saying, hey, I know we don't get along, but know I still love you because I am willing to put time and money into making something for you that will keep you warm. I finished them late (was my first pair of socks 😅) and I haven't gone up to visit yet, since, but regardless of how he acts, I know he at least understands and appreciates it, based solely on how he is, was raised, and who he is as a person.
I can't NOT be a selfish crafter. The second I feel that I no longer have a choice or control over my project (IE its for someone else, not something I would make or not something I get to keep) the joy is sucked right out and I have no drive to make it. I also struggle severely with finishing projects, and it feels like torture when I have to finish something just to give it away. I only have 2 gift worthy people in my entire circle including friends and family, and one of them is a knitter so they understand the time and energy that goes into it and will cherish it.
When I started knitting, I would give things to people and they would NEVER wear them. That really turned me off from giving things to anyone. Fast forward to 3 years ago, I learned to crochet amigurumi dolls, and that was a different story. People love receiving a little amigurumi of a cute animal, especially for cat owners I would crochet a little mouse and put some catnip inside.
I love to give handmade gifts. My problem is getting into the mindset I have to gift everyone equally and I cause myself a lot of stress that way. Trying to break that habit. This year one daughter in law will get a beautiful lace scarf because I knew as soon as I saw the yarn I wanted to do that for her. But I won’t have time to make something equal to that for my other daughter in law this year. I will buy her something nice instead.
I'm a selfish knitter and sewist by necessity. I have super sensitive skin, and can't wear synthetic fibres without breaking out into rashes, welts and blisters. I don't trust a lot of store-bought clothing to be completely synthetic free, because even clothing that is labeled as 100% natural fibre will still often have the seams sewn with synthetic thread. If I didn't make clothing predominantly for myself, including my own underwear, I would literally have nothing to wear.
I kinda have a hard time being selfish with knitting, because all my family always ask me to make something for them and I cant say no.. but I think I can appreciate my makes the most so I enjoy making stuff for myself the most haha
For me I'm not a selfish I love making things for other people and gifting them but I don't make clothing or anything that takes that much time I make toys or keychains or tiny things that nothing that takes too many hours and for me I see something that I really want to make but I don't want to have a whole bunch of toys around when I first started crocheting I would literally looking for people to give stuff to I had all of these tiny projects and I just want it really fun to make it and to the next gifted to someone to show them what I was doing But then it lost its joy and I stopped crocheting for a while because my family started asking for things specific things a bag a hat and then it was no longer my choice and then I gave up and I'm getting back into it again but I'm doing it more but I'm going back to the original where I did it or I make whatever I want and give it to whoever I want or keep it I don't need a lot of stuff my joy comes from making it I don't think I'd ever be able to make like a clothing item for someone that wouldn't take care of it like a sweater or shirt or dress I have made a hat and I might make another hat for someone but those are pretty simple it's not a whole lot of time but anything that would need to be fitted or really taken care of
Well, judging by myself... I call myself a selfish knitter or a selfish project especially when I do have a project intended for someone but I still prefer to knit on a project for me and do pick it over the one intended for someone else. Then I do call myself selfish, especially if the person is waiting, but knitting on the piece just does not bring me joy, hence the "selfish" 😅
I think a lot of people would be happy to know few people really want the handcrafted carefully made boutique items and are more excited about mass produced crap on Amazon etc.
I hate the term Selfish Knitting. Knitting for yourself is not selfish at all. It’s actually smart to engage in a activity that gives you peace of mind and a great product for you to wear. I am more I inclined to teach someone to knit instead of making something for them.
I think people /family members are the selfish ones because they expect you to make something for them when they find out you craft and turn you down when you say I will teach you so you can make it for yourselves and they come up with the myriad of excuses why they won't so that also means they are really not willing to spend quality time with you. So I basically knit for me .
I prefer to consider myself a process knitter. I enjoy the process. If I choose to give the item away, cool. If I choose to keep it, cool. Frankly, it's my money and time and therefore if someone called me a selfish knitter, I'd just smile and agree.
Hi, good job! Your knitting is beautiful. You look like Elizabeth Montgomery she was famous in the 60’s and 70’s. Will you do a video helping us to do the knitting style you are performing? Jehovah bless your good qualities and that you want to encourage others to enjoy creative ventures as creativity is a gift from God. Using our hands to create beautiful things is a hearts reward. Keep up the lovely work your doing.
I never really understood why people would use a label such as "selfish knitter/crafter." You picked out and purchased the materials and supplies. You learned the skill set needed to do your craft. You are spending all of the time making things. The products of your labor, knowledge, and skills are justifiably yours. Others are selfish for assuming that what you make should be available predominantly for others to enjoy.
Some of us get a little dopamine hit while working on a project we are going to gift to a person. As I get older, though, I have really only made handmade items for people that I know will truly appreciate them and that is a very small group.
Recently, a friend made the most beautiful embroidered tree skirt and donated it to a raffle for a friend in medical need and it got hundreds of dollars. Someone approached her and asked if they could commission a similar piece. She stumbled and was trying to say no. I helped by asking, “what is the true cost of the piece?” She said it was close to a couple hundred dollars of materials and too many hours of work to count. “It’s so valuable, it can only be gifted.” She took a loss to donate it but it was worth it for her friend. We need to realize the preciousness of our own talents and protect them. Keep them for yourself or give them sparingly to the most worthy.
I recently have become a selfish crafter. Especially with my yarn crafts. I am a mom to two young children so I consider making things for them part of that selfishness since I have been gifted so many handmade things for them that I felt I couldn't make then anything without being rude to others. But the 3 of us worth making things for and I no longer care what others project on to me.
Love that!
Just saw your video--months after you posted it. There is nothing selfish about using your time wisely to be creative and self-nurturing. No one is going to take care of me except me. The same goes for everyone else.
This totally resonates with me! Being a runner/gym rat that also crochets for me I’m often told my hobbies are selfish too. It definitely is about the expectation of being a caregiver due to gender norms mixed with the expectation that everything we do needs to generate some form of capital.
Very well put
I don’t knit, but I have started sewing again after a ten-year hiatus. I mostly want to sew for myself and sometimes my daughters. I was struck that I’ve never sewn anything for my husband of 11 years and immediately felt so guilty. It’s also amazing how anytime someone finds out I sew, they immediately suggest monetizing it. I remember my brother a long time ago saying he didn’t want to be a photographer, because he felt it would ruin his enjoyment of his hobby. I love how your video touches on alllll these disparate memories. It’s okay to sew for me. It’s okay to sew for others when I feel like it. It’s okay not to monetize my sewing. It’s a hobby. The idea of the “selfish marathoner” is so perfectly illustrative of how silly the concept of selfish handiwork even is. We don’t HAVE to sew for our families anymore. It is a gift and a joy, but when you add guilt and crippling expectations to that, it ruins the joy. Say “no” and hold on to the joy! Though, I will probably make something for my husband in the upcoming year. 😉
Es ist aber viel schwieriger, etwas für einen Mann zu nähen! Businessanzug?? Herrenhemd? Poloshirt? T-Shirt? Meiner könnte eine Workerhose gebrauchen, das ist richtig Arbeit.
This this this! I gifted a crochet lizard to a coworker for her 5 year old son, and she suggested I could sell them on Etsy. I could, sure, but that would turn my hobby into a source of stress.
To me it is selfish that people feel entitled to my time and energy. I do enjoy making knit gifts occasionally, but if someone asks me if I can make them a huge project I always let them know how much time and energy it would take.
That’s something that people do with artists too, like “oh can you just draw me a picture” I think people really just don’t realize what they are asking for
Also, I have not heard the term selfish embroiderer, but my mom has encouraged me to give embroidery as gifts and I have to explain to her how much time and effort energy goes into it.
I think crafting and arts in general are things people think are “quick and easy” which sucks because a lot of craft really takes a lot of time and skill.
We can ask ourself, how to define altruistic ? When you sacrifice yourself for the good of somebody else, it become toxic. Life is an exchange, you lie when you say you give something without any interest. You are right when you say, I do/give it because it makes ME happy. But it must really make you happy, not because it's polite to say so. The best present you can give to the world is to love yourself (and selfish), because you let others to be free to love you or not... and so you let others to love themselves loving you or not.
Love your videos, I'm proud to understand almost everything (I learn English thanks to youtube and you are one of my favorite teacher haha)
We live in a culture that demands everything we do must "make money" to have value. Total crap. True value is creating beauty, joy, and harmony in your own life. Others can't help but benefit vicariously when you're exuding joy.
I'm so glad you put this video out, it's been something I've been thinking a lot about recently too! I do a lot of gift knitting, I usually plan in the spring, buy yarn in June, and spend the next 6 months knitting only for other people, and this year it was really draining. I made 5 sweaters for gifts. Both my boyfriend and my bestie are encouraging me to make 2023 my only for me knitting year, at least until I make all my planned projects meant for me, and I finally cast on a knit meant for myself this week!
I think an only for you hear sounds great! You’ve earned it!
I suppose my other thought is that I usually hear 'selfish knitter' used in the context of someone pressuring you to do otherwise, and it rhetorically does a very good job of protecting your boundaries. If you say, 'I knit for myself,' you leave the door open for that to be interpreted negatively. By owning the negative interpretation, you're owning that part of the dynamic. I don't like it as a general descriptive term, but as a boundary defense, it has teeth no matter how mildly spoken. There's a value in that. Where it gets odd is when it becomes an identity.
I needed to listen to this msg. I’m always guilting myself into making others items! So…Thank you😘🙏 This was very applicable and perfect timing.
This is a wonderful video. I love gift knitting. But I am making an extra effort to knit beautiful things for myself and I love that too.
Personally I love gift knitting but do knit for myself more because I wait until I find the right gift knit. I tell people "I want to knit something for you, and I will when I find the right pattern/yarn" or if they want something specific I tell them yes but IDK when I'll do it when I'm inspired to, and every single person that I've been willing to gift knit for has respected those things because they're wonderful people who are knit worthy. And then when I feel like it's time to knit the gift, I'm so excited and happy to do it!
I have always been a "selfish" maker. Not that I don't enjoy making things for others, I do! But I do not make unsolicited items anymore. At a minimum, I ask the person on their preferred colour, shape, ease, etc. so I know that it will fit into their life. To me, that's the *most* unselfish making.
I'm also a big fan of making for barter, never for cash (that not I judge those who do it, get that bread!). Maybe that's selfish?! I love making for someone when I'm getting something in return made by their hands.
Thanks for an interesting convo!
I just started learning to crochet so I have never heard that term before but I don't like it. I can see how there is an expectation on knitters and in particular women to be making items for others. Knitting for yourself should not be viewed as selfish. By creating something for yourself, you're not taking anything away from others. Any craft can take a lot of skill and time and money invested and others aren't entitled to that.
You are a very intelligent and interesting person. Thank you for this enlightenment! Lots of love from Lisbon 🥰...
Such a great perspective! I hope I can encourage my mom with this video!
Also I’m getting into crochet as a former knitter, I just want to make adorable stuffed animals for myself. There are a few people I’d make things for, but already my mom is like “crochet a blanket for your new nephew” and I’m like uhmmmm nah. She always knit things for other people, never herself. I plan to change that.
Intergenerational healing through making! I love it! Thank you for this video ❤
This video is so many of the things I love about your content. I'm only halfway through and already I want to give it multiple thumbs up.
P.S. it's relaxing to watch you knit
I knit for myself (and I agree that selfish is not the right word), but I have in the past made things for family members and enjoyed that experience as well. Recently, I've been teaching my sisters to knit, and I feel like that is one way that I can show my love through my craft. For Christmas this year, instead of knitting something for them, I'm buying them yarn so that they can enjoy knitting up their own projects.
This was the first video I’ve seen on your channel & I really enjoyed it. I honestly had never heard the term “selfish knitter” but I totally get it. I used to knit a lot for others & would feel very disappointed when those gifts weren’t used or appreciated & over the years I’ve really trimmed down what I knit for others. Holiday knitting in particular stresses me out at a time of year when I already feel overwhelmed. I 100% agree with you about knitting for my mental health. It is a hobby that I enjoy for many reasons & that is a big one for me. If that is considered selfish I honestly don’t care! Your comparison to a selfish marathon runner or stamp collector make me laugh out loud! What a great comparison & a silly expectation for any other hobby… I really look forward to more videos. I was knitting some socks while I watched & it felt like sitting & knitting with a friend. Thanks for the chat & happy knitting!
Thanks for being here!
I have been predominantly a gift knitter. I have a large (and specially decorated) shoebox, and through out the year I usually finish many small projects and add them to the box. A lot of dish cloths as palette cleansers, socks, hats, get added to the box and then when friends or family visit I let them pick something from the box. I find gift giving occasions to be particularly stressful and prefer to just give when I see those close to me. In the last few years I have started doing more "me" projects and I really feel a sense of pride in knowing that I made certain pieces of my wardrobe, but it's also really nice to put some of this time towards me too.
That’s so nice to hear!
There are a lot of selfish people out there who would want you to make them socks, or a hat. Why wouldn't you be able to make yourself those things, you need socks too, right? I crochet but never learned to knit, I also have other hobbies, I quilt, I do needlepoint, some years I put in a garden, I share, but not my quilting, it's too expensive to have anyone not fully appreciate that I used quality fabric or had it professionally quilted. My quilts can cost upwards of $600. plus my time.
Edit: Self care is essential, good for you!!!
I was just watching some of your older sewing videos, and you upload a new video! 🤩 Good luck and congrats on your 10K milestone 🎉
Aw that’s so fun, thank you for your support!
Thank you for bringing thus up. I HATE this word and what it stands for. Everytime I hear it or see it I cringe and get really angry. I agree with everything you say here! 😉
Although I dont knit, I'm teaching myself how to crochet and sew. I've decided to start working on a me made/upscale wardrobe by combining the two 🥰 for sure this time. Ur videos have inspired me so much. Ur so sweet, u reminnd me of my daughters. Thank you for sharing your skills and bits of yourself 🤗
There are really no people in my life who are worthy of handknits. They believe handmade=cheap. They have no idea what yarn costs. And th3 time…..hours and hours to make the project only to have it disrespected as disposable. I tired of having my feelings hurt because my peeps didn’t value my time and money.
I just found your channel and at a perfect time! My daughter-in-law I asked me to make her a sweater. I said yes and was so excited that she wanted something handmade but then I found out she wanted it to hang on a chair in her office when she was cold. I love her dearly but realized she doesn’t understand what goes into making a garment. I have finished it and will gift it to her with love but the term selfish knitter will become a big part of my vocabulary.
Oh I’m so glad you found this video! That was lovely for you to do but I can totally understand why that may have been disappointing to hear!
I cannot imagine gifting or selling everything I make! It takes way too much time and effort for me to let it out of my home! I make clothes and toys for my kids, but I still can use the toys and I mostly make them clothes because I want to make a smaller project. My kids are so little I consider making something for them basically the same as making it for myself.
Also, thank you for the idea of Gift bank! This would really take the holiday presure off of my shoulders!
Thank you for posting this video with your reflections on this topic! Only this year (in 2022) I accepted that knitting is enjoyable and beneficial for me and I want to keep doing it every day, compared to the past when I didn't allow myself to purchase yarn or spend hours on knitting, so yeah, I'm a deserving knitter not a selfish knitter :)
I personally love making for my family, since they appreciate it properly. I am trying to make more stuff to myself, but I LOVE seeing the face of someone who I've gifted something. I love gifting everything, I barely ever buy anything to myself even! But I'm trying to be more "selfish"
Also I know this is an old video, but I loved it!
I think knitting falls into what might have been considered "cottage industries" for the working class and working poor. This puts it in a category with seamstresses and soapmakers, beekeepers and handymen. It additionally falls on the feminine side of the gendered division of labor.
It is worth noting, too, how rare it would be to tell a male office worker who's has good fix-it skills to become an electrician, say - *even when* he might be might be getting markèdly better money abd union protections in the trades. It is telling both about class and gender expectations that women are told all the time to do for pay these modes of traditionally undervalued work, while men are not, even when the financial value of their work is higher than whatever 'serious' job they occupy.
Often, people aren't suggesting it as an 'instead of' option. It's supposed to go on top of everything else, because we are the gender of holding loose ends together. But this added obligation is also supposed to make us feel liberated, because we love what we're doing so much.
I should add, when it's not expected to be just another thing on top of everything else, it is often a thinly veiled assumption that women would prefer to be in the home, if they were only just making enough money domestically to make that justified. As a person for whom that is actually the case - I definitely don't represent most women.
I'm a selfish knitter and sewer. Unfortunately the people I know barely appreciate store bought gifts. I'm a slow knitter so I'd rather not waste my time making something and the person doesnt use it.
Well sweet KC , I’ve been knitting for over 40years now,I’ve knitted for my kids then family members would ask me to knit for them… and as I was getting more confident on my abilities… I started creating and selling my work… 2 months ago I was hospitalized and I asked my daughter to get me some yarns that I wanted for this time knit for myself that I designed a knitted long jacket and I wanted to wear something I had made… that I was good enough… deserving to wear one of my own creations… so I’ve started the jacket, had to frog it all lol cuz I knew that I made some errors in the beginning so now I’m halfway to the end… created a pullover…. Started it… for myself also lol… so y’a I’ve started to be selfish now 😂… always felt that I didn’t deserve to wear what I was making… I’m the same way in all my fibres crafts… crocheting sewing lace making… I’ve been working a lot on myself and now I do think that I deserve perfection that comes out of my hands lol I’ll let you know how it feels to wear one of my own creations 😊😉
10k! Woooowwwww. Well done ❤. Always love your videos. I’m so glad so many people feel the same. I’ve always prioritised gift knits but when this year’s autumn rolled round, I finally switched to being selfish!
When you mentioned knitting being woman-dominated it reminded me of a polish word used for items crafted (often from fiber like knitting, tatting, crocheting, embroidery etc): robótki. It's a diminutive of the word "robota" or "roboty" which is like "a work"/"making a thing".
I've only seen robótki being used when women are doing it, like what's being produced isn't a proper THING but more of a THING-Y/a knickknack/nothing actually productive but it's never used for like a decorative thing made by a man.
Makes you feel some sort of way, huh.
Wow thanks for sharing this!
I don't mind gifting my sister or my mother knitting, but albeit I'm still a very new knitter so it has been nice to put less pressure on myself by making some gifts. They appreciate the gifts and it makes me happy. But I am a very selfish person at my core, so I know that now that they got those gifts these years I'm going to knit for myself this year, now that I'm finally beginning to feel happy with the finished results of what I make.
A lot of times, I knit things because I want to try, use up, or purchase a thing. I don't even have a plan, then I find someone who can use and appreciate them. Funny thing is, I don't get along very well with my dad, he kinda has a hair across or a stick up something I ain't gonna name, but when I thought about it, I knitted him a pair of wool socks for Christmas. Why? Well partly as an olive branch, but also because of the people I know, he's one I know appreciates the time invested into it. It was me saying, hey, I know we don't get along, but know I still love you because I am willing to put time and money into making something for you that will keep you warm.
I finished them late (was my first pair of socks 😅) and I haven't gone up to visit yet, since, but regardless of how he acts, I know he at least understands and appreciates it, based solely on how he is, was raised, and who he is as a person.
I can't NOT be a selfish crafter. The second I feel that I no longer have a choice or control over my project (IE its for someone else, not something I would make or not something I get to keep) the joy is sucked right out and I have no drive to make it. I also struggle severely with finishing projects, and it feels like torture when I have to finish something just to give it away. I only have 2 gift worthy people in my entire circle including friends and family, and one of them is a knitter so they understand the time and energy that goes into it and will cherish it.
When I started knitting, I would give things to people and they would NEVER wear them. That really turned me off from giving things to anyone. Fast forward to 3 years ago, I learned to crochet amigurumi dolls, and that was a different story. People love receiving a little amigurumi of a cute animal, especially for cat owners I would crochet a little mouse and put some catnip inside.
I love to give handmade gifts. My problem is getting into the mindset I have to gift everyone equally and I cause myself a lot of stress that way. Trying to break that habit. This year one daughter in law will get a beautiful lace scarf because I knew as soon as I saw the yarn I wanted to do that for her. But I won’t have time to make something equal to that for my other daughter in law this year. I will buy her something nice instead.
I'm a selfish knitter and sewist by necessity. I have super sensitive skin, and can't wear synthetic fibres without breaking out into rashes, welts and blisters. I don't trust a lot of store-bought clothing to be completely synthetic free, because even clothing that is labeled as 100% natural fibre will still often have the seams sewn with synthetic thread. If I didn't make clothing predominantly for myself, including my own underwear, I would literally have nothing to wear.
I kinda have a hard time being selfish with knitting, because all my family always ask me to make something for them and I cant say no.. but I think I can appreciate my makes the most so I enjoy making stuff for myself the most haha
For me I'm not a selfish I love making things for other people and gifting them but I don't make clothing or anything that takes that much time I make toys or keychains or tiny things that nothing that takes too many hours and for me I see something that I really want to make but I don't want to have a whole bunch of toys around when I first started crocheting I would literally looking for people to give stuff to I had all of these tiny projects and I just want it really fun to make it and to the next gifted to someone to show them what I was doing
But then it lost its joy and I stopped crocheting for a while because my family started asking for things specific things a bag a hat and then it was no longer my choice and then I gave up and I'm getting back into it again but I'm doing it more but I'm going back to the original where I did it or I make whatever I want and give it to whoever I want or keep it I don't need a lot of stuff my joy comes from making it
I don't think I'd ever be able to make like a clothing item for someone that wouldn't take care of it like a sweater or shirt or dress I have made a hat and I might make another hat for someone but those are pretty simple it's not a whole lot of time but anything that would need to be fitted or really taken care of
Well, judging by myself... I call myself a selfish knitter or a selfish project especially when I do have a project intended for someone but I still prefer to knit on a project for me and do pick it over the one intended for someone else. Then I do call myself selfish, especially if the person is waiting, but knitting on the piece just does not bring me joy, hence the "selfish" 😅
I'm only a selfish knitter! Whensmeone asks about buying something and i tell them a price they are floored!
I think a lot of people would be happy to know few people really want the handcrafted carefully made boutique items and are more excited about mass produced crap on Amazon etc.
I hate the term Selfish Knitting. Knitting for yourself is not selfish at all. It’s actually smart to engage in a activity that gives you peace of mind and a great product for you to wear. I am more I inclined to teach someone to knit instead of making something for them.
I think people /family members are the selfish ones because they expect you to make something for them when they find out you craft and turn you down when you say I will teach you so you can make it for yourselves and they come up with the myriad of excuses why they won't so that also means they are really not willing to spend quality time with you. So I basically knit for me .
I prefer to consider myself a process knitter. I enjoy the process. If I choose to give the item away, cool. If I choose to keep it, cool. Frankly, it's my money and time and therefore if someone called me a selfish knitter, I'd just smile and agree.
That’s a great way to look at it!
I'm a selfish sewer. When people know you so, everyone wants you to fix their hem or tighten this or shorten that for free. I don't do it anymore.
Hi, good job! Your knitting is beautiful. You look like Elizabeth Montgomery she was famous in the 60’s and 70’s. Will you do a video helping us to do the knitting style you are performing? Jehovah bless your good qualities and that you want to encourage others to enjoy creative ventures as creativity is a gift from God. Using our hands to create beautiful things is a hearts reward. Keep up the lovely work your doing.