Pete Walker Healing Complex PTSD
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 26 ก.ย. 2024
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I feel so loved when Pete says, "It's not fair, it shouldn't have happened." Thank you for seeing us and saying that.
I once had a doctor tell me I had a chip on my shoulder, and I have an ACE score of 8 out of 10.
Yes❤
Agreed, 100% the same feeling. Pete is brilliant and his book has done so much to save my life.
Pete Walker is a living saint. I wish his wisdom and understanding on cptsd is wider known. I wish I had the understanding of what was happening to me when I was younger.
Me too but we got in’
I feel the same
The Tao of Fully Feeling saved my life, Pete. You are a blessing unto this world. Thank you so much for your work in this field.
I've taken diary and write down all the painful memories. I cried for hours. My conclusion was that there's no way I can undo it, there's no justice for little me, no consequences for those who hurt me and I need to accept it. And that acceptance of the pain and injustice that happened to me helped me. I felt my heart melting. There's a long way to healing but I finally made the first step.
I understand. Let go of the courtroom in your head. It will never help you. Never go back to those people and put yourself first now. See a good therapist and get Pete’s book. Those are my suggestions. I am with you as we walk this new path at our own pace.
Accept the challenge of existence
It is a hard journey and I am so proud of you and the steps you're taking! Keep going, it will get easier! ❤
Pete’s book saved me. I read it in my early 60s after abandonment by the then narcissist in my life, and in reading it I found myself. It has taken me a while to reach me but he gave me a path along which I am still travelling but now I am enjoying the journey.
I was the fawner, handmaiden, problem solver trapped in repeated narcissistic relationships. I am now practicing self love and care, lots of creativity and caring for my body so that I can finally recover from MECFS.
Thank you Pete 🙏🏼❤️
I completely relate to all that. Every human should get Pete’s book. It’s my Bible. You wouldn’t believe what my copy looks like at this point. I walk with you.
I am the same cfs for 28 years never knew it was because of my narcissist mother and narcissist sister. I am finally grieving for all the years of abuse. Going to cut away from these toxic taking users. Finally love myself.
@@lynnglass57559, and finally cut off from narc family, including the malignant narc I was married to for 25 yrs. Grieving my losses and trying to move on with my children
I am 59 and just found out what scapegoating abuse is all about. I finally have an answer for what I’ve been experiencing. Survived a ten year heroin addiction. But, I made it. I said goodbye to my family last year and I’m starting to finally heal
For all its worth, I will pray for you.
Keep forging. Keep healing. You’ve got this!!
That's incredibly inspiring, bless you ❤
Wow. You are amazing. I found out about scapegoating also and realized it wasn’t me all this time. Same with you.
This comment gives me enormous strength. Makes me feel less alone. Thank you so much. We are powerful beyond measure!
Everyone should pay attention to this man, he should be famous. His book is so accurate and life changing everyone should read it because let’s face it: Almost everyone has bad childhood experiences
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🎉 2:25 ..
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I am 64. CPTSD developmental trauma stole my life, left me frozen in fear 24/7. But the borderlines Love to keep me as company.
Hi. I'm nearly 60. I mirror your comment. I hope there's still time to heal, to move forward and to experience a lifetime of love. To love and be loved. I'm doing the work
I need to.Thanks to Pete Walker and others like him. Praying 🙏 for you all. ❤
I'm 62. Similar experience
53 here.. mother was borderline personality disordered living nightmare. Confusion and ZERO ability to remember anything I learn or do and the fear it causes me to feel at work has now got me thinking about early retirement with only 16 years pension which would leave me skint for the rest of my life and my quality of life would plummet. CPTSD has made my life unbearable.
I'm 61, and only recently discovered that I've been suffering from cptsd for all these decades. 6 years ago the fog started lifting for the first time. I feel so cheated and out of time.
the interviewer had to throw in there identity politics when Pete is generously sharing so much eye opening information with us.
I absolutely obsessed about running away all the time as a teen and did when I was getting yelled at, until I felt better then returned. I moved out at 17 (from my Catholic parents) and never went back. I struggled, I starved, I made poor choices until I decided to join the Air Force after high school and that was the BEST decision I ever made for my life ❤
I have spent most of my life dreaming of running away..childhood group home for ten years, a 15 year marriage and in my marriage now to a classic narcissist 😢 Im trying to find what helps
@@ImreadyforJesus Do it! It’s time to make yourself happy, but just remember- you’re still taking YOU with you so, in the process, YOU need to learn that lesson and grow from the inside out. I love you and am praying for your happiness ❤️
This book changed my life and healed me. It described my struggle with CPTSD perfectly and it felt like this book spoke to my struggles in many levels. Thank you, Pete Walker for writing this book.
I am 44 and Im a fight and fawn type. I just discovered this mans work. I have 3 coping addictions: Food, cigarettes and weed. Food was used as a child, cigarettes as an adolescent and weed as an adult. I bought the book and its coming today through Amazon. I listened to videos on his book to kind of get a jump start yesterday and already I have stopped smoking weed and ate normally yesterday to just see how my body feels using a few exercised Ive learned from him to combat emotional flashbacks and it works. I am sooo grateful to have found his work. I will continue to break this cycle. God bless this man.
🦋
I'm so greatful for your book. It even makes me think I might not be such a shit I think I am. And hardly anything make me feel this way nowadays. You make this world a better place. ❤ The worst thing about trama is, it can break you and you begin to repeat that cycle of abuse, but this time not as victim but as a perpatrator. But you can go another way and try to break this chain and help other sufferers. Like Chiron, wounded healer. It's so deeply ... humane? And I don't use this adjective often as a compliment 😂. Nor am I often so deeply mooved. You touch that soft spot and make me human again. Just like in that Rumi motto of your book:
When inward tenderness
Finds the secret hurt,
Pain itself will crack the rock
And, Ah! Let the soul emerge.
WOW! Pete Walker is showing up in interviews! Thank you so much! Pete, happy to see you & hear what you have to say!
WOW! So many nuggets of truth. "The majority of emotional flashbacks are coming from the nasty way you are talking to yourself. You are just reenacting the criticism, not giving yourself a break, just totally being against yourself."
Not true. My emotional flashbacks have no sound nor thoughts whatsoever.
@@emarekica not everyone’s are the same. So, not true in your case would be more accurate
Pete's work has changed me on so many levels. At first, I knew what a flashback was because it happened at certain times in my day (morning when I wake up terrifying myself). But as I continued to meditate and follow the practices he provides, I found that a majority of my day is actually playing out in a flashback. (I'm a high functioning Four F'r, ha,ha!) It's no wonder I have asthma and other heath disorders - how could I not? Like seriously, how could I NOT have health issues. Thank you, Pete, thanks for all you've done to help so many of us!
My much of my day is played out in flashback Wow! That hit home - you’re so right Christina and I only realised it once you said it.
Four Fs?
@@CinHalCedHerChance Four F’s is a reference in Pete Walker’s book. Fight, Flight, Freeze, Fawn.
@@christinap.3743 I hope to read the book one day, I have it, but have put it off because no doubt it will piss me off.. part of me will wish I could have known better and done something about life at the time it was happening.
@@CinHalCedHerChance ❤❤❤❤ Imagine you still have 50 more years. After all time is an illusion.
I think one thing that held me back as a child and even into adulthood was the fact that I would feel mortified if friends, neighbors, teachers would find out I am not worthy of kind treatment from caregivers and that I'm a fraud - I'm pretending to be from a good family, but I'm really not loved. - if they find out what a bad person I am, these people might even treat me bad too.
You’re not a bad person. Bad information was implanted in you and I know it’s hard to release it, but the FIRST thing you have to change is the language you’re using. You’re a good person, you’re worthy and valuable. Don’t give up on your healing. Life is beautiful.
I also feel that to some degree. I think it's us identifying with the wicked inner critic.
The critic is truly harsh, bad and deserves to be punished; not our true selves.
Everytime this thought process occurs acknowledge the identification with the critic and his evil nature and remember that you are not him.
You weren’t born with an abusive inner critic. I wonder who deliberately groomed you to have those feelings?
This is so relatable. I am a textbook fawner. I calmed my alcholic narcissistic father down and was my enabler mother's therapist. I hate them both but I am trying to forgive. I was also called gifted and precocious which is funny. Literally becoming my parents slave is so messed up.
Your post was timely. I wasn't my narc's enabler, yet my elder daughter was my emotional dump, and the younger one was his gold btwn. I was feeling guilty about pushing him away, but I'm glad he's gone after 25 yrs. Btwn the two of us, our abuse would have caused the children to leave home for good. Now we are all healing
I so agree with healing trauma first in revovery. I couldn't stay sober for 35 years and i dealt with a big portion of the truama and i was able to put the dope down and walk away, never looking back. That was 4 years ago. I continue to heal myself. I don't think it's ever 100% resolved.
You are so right. I am certain there is no healing but there is good management of trauma. So proud of you! Keep going.
Thank you for this. I listened and stopped multiple times because everything was making so much sense and this video alone helped me release so much pain. It really put things in perspective for me. The thing pete said about going for the pain, I’m never going to forget that. It’s a completely new concept for me that pain can actually be my healing light if I’m brave enough to work through it and feel it out. And this talk gave me the courage to tell myself that yes of course I’m brave enough. I got through the traumatic childhood and I’m still here and that’s gotta count for something.
Anna Runkle has a TH-cam channel called Crappy Childhood Fairy that is also very helpful.
@@MichelleLovesJesusshe is not a good source at all.
It definitely counts for something
@@Gemmarose9012when you say something like that, why don't you give a reason?
It’s just amazing that I lived more than half my life believing I was just no good. I was bad and flawed only to find out it was your family doing it to you all along. I struggled my whole life In everything I did. Relationships, jobs, drugs you name it. Then when it’s all said and done to heal you have to give up your family to stop the abuse. Then you’re all alone and your left out of the will. Lol, this is a horrible thing to happen t0 any person and you hve to educate yourself and heal yourself because the metal communities and all the doctors and in the dark ages.
I almost gave up before the miracle. I was tired. Insane for doing the steps again & again when it was wrong tool.
Grieving is healing me.
When I wasn’t even at the half of the book (cptsd), I thought ‘this has done so much more for me than all the other therapy (even emdr) has ever done for me. Thank you so much Pete!
I'm only a few minutes in but already I want to comment. I never heard before of people who believe in healing the trauma first. I've been seeking treatment for 15 years, and every time, I was rejected and told that I should heal my addiction first. So I tried addiction treatments, but none of them worked because I was completely overwhelmed in those groups despite my best efforts. I was punished and blamed over and over again. The result is 15 years of failure, and no treatment for trauma whatsoever. I'm getting seriously discouraged. But hearing this, it feels like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I'm not inadequate, I couldn't heal addiction this way, not without healing trauma at the same time. I managed to stop drinking many many times, but I wasn't better. In fact, every time I managed to stop drinking, I was miserable, and it was never good enough to get treatment. Whatever I tried was never good enough, and I tried it all, I knocked on all doors, doctors, therapists, I went to meetings, I tried on my own many times, I stuck with medication with awful side effects. It's almost as if, in order to be eligible for treatment, you have to be already healed. I never lied about my addiction, because I thought I shouldn't lie to people who are supposed to help, but I thought many times since then that maybe it would have been wise to lie.
It’s like asking someone with a broken leg to walk without crutches. Heal the pain from trauma, get yourself doing and feeling better, learn healthier coping mechanisms and you will likely have less of a desire to over so it with mood altering substances.
I’m still early on in healing CPTSD. It’s been four years since I started trying to figure out why I had yet another incredibly toxic intimate relationship and quit another decent job. Having things go poorly eventually led me to learning about CPTSD. Im not where I want to be but with the knowledge of what went wrong I have started to do things differently. I still have a lot of wreckage to clean up but I’m not repeating my unhealthy cycles as badly anymore. I can’t believe it’s taken so long to make such little progress but I’m definitely getting better ever so slowly.
I spoke to a very kind man who worked for the mental health organisation I was trying to access, I explained that I've had addiction issues and he advised to not say anything about it because instead of being treated like a victim of abuse, I'd instead be treated as an addict first and foremost, that I wouldn't get any help for my trauma until I was 'clean'. To say I was shocked was an understatement. At least I got lucky and spoke to the right person first... Now I know how the system works I'm appalled at the state of the whole thing
@@danieldanton1129 That is good advice.
This is why traditional 12 step treatment has such a poor track record. How many times is trauma mentioned in traditional 12 step treatment programs? Zero. After my son had graduated from 8 treatment programs and relapsed every time and eventually died I learned so much about how the treatment industry needs a complete overhaul. It is hard to believe that it is even legal. I made some assumptions that were totally incorrect such as I assumed that there were standards of care and a monitoring board as exists for hospitals. I therefore assumed that these programs had an acceptable success rate because if they were failing they would be sanctioned and eventually closed, but there is no one following up on treatment centers. When I learned that 95% of treatment centers all offered the same community based 12 step program available for free without going anywhere, and yet they charge into the thousands of dollars per day knowing they are making empty promises. And when you fail, these programs tell you that it is working for everyone else. I was naive a decade ago because I believed going to treatment would cure addiction, and if anything some of the programs only made everything worse because they caused more trauma. I could not believe that with all the time and money we had given them to treat my son he got no trauma treatment, almost no therapy. Instead he got to pet a horse and swing on a trapeze neither of which did anything to address the reasons he used drugs. Can you imagine if the treatment for diabetes, heart disease or cancer was thousands of dollars per day with very limited coverage by insurance, and the antiquated gold standard of treatment hasn't been updated or modified since 1939 even though it is only helping 8% of participants? No one would tolerate that for anyone else, but addicts are treated like throw away people instead of some of the most amazing, empathic, and creative people among us.
Healing as a marathon. The last man standing is us, never giving up on ourselves 💖
Putting a name to the Critic and the Abandonment Melange has been incredibly helpful to me in defeating them. I can name it, know what's happening, and deal with it much faster than I could before - THANK YOU.
When you hear him describe what’s been in your head for years! Very comforting. 😊
How many people in this comment section sat in the principal’s office or psychiatrist’s office while your parents lied and said everything was good at home and then you’re labeled as having a learning disability or the classic “chemical imbalance”.
Freeze response, that’s me. I still struggle with it. At least I’m aware now, thanks to Pete Walker’s work.
From Nlp I learned to externalise the inner critic in a funny voice. It takes the power out of it.
I read his book and it helped me so much! Also his articles on his website. Before I discovered his work, I was diagnosed with PTSD but I felt something was missing. It was through him I first discovered CPTSD and I felt that what he said was describing my symptoms exactly. It's been 10 years since then and I'm much better (although it's still a struggle at times).
Thank god for TH-cam videos or I’d be dead now. I am older and just learned what happened to me. I went no contact fast once I knew I was the family scapegoat. My brother who hated me I mean hated me from infancy until present day got his last shot at me. My Farther’s narc wife hated me and my daughter because we were close. She refused to allow us to come see my dying father. My family of course didn’t defend or stand up to her. I voiced my disappointment with my father for the first time ever and my brother called me trailer park trash. That was his last shot at me and I’m 59 yrs old.
I got some help from daily practice from crappy childhood fairy. That is free. I paid for a year of support and got kicked out. We are not alone. SA is my current safe, free space.
Interestingly there is great overlap with Karen Horney's theory of neurosis, she didn't specifically state it in terms of trauma but actually gave an incredibly accurate description of developmental trauma - how it begins early in childhood, how it unravels and evolves - just that it was named 'neurosis' back then. Oh and the 'Fawning' response was also there, discussed at length and described in minute detail (only named differently - "the compliant solution")
Do you know in which Karen Horney’s book developmental trauma could be named as neurosis? I worked a lot of years with therapists from Horney’s school and was never able to make them understand what was I going through. Suffered a lot of gaslighting from them but still used the word neurosis a lot. I understood perfectly the ongoing trauma that my “neurosis” was creating but they never understood how I just couldn’t “stop” the “neurotic” behavior so gave me the classic more Freudian outlook of “it seems that you enjoy this suffering, otherwise why you’ll keep at it”… Morons.
@@allnargles It's her final big work, "Neurosis and Human Growth" (although some good pointers can be found in some of her earlier work like "Self-Analysis"). I'm quite surprised by the approach the therapists took with you, normally it's not the neurosis that causes the trauma but the other around.
C-PTSD is an inside job- with help and coaching. I am have what they call lived experience. At age 72 I can see clearly the impact of various episodes on my life's course. Interludes of embracing "codependency theory" helped me understand my own impulses- and to avoid others who wanted to help, or change me- in ways that I was not ready for.
Thank you Dave. I have been seeking my entire life and this is were I am today at 66.
Am 72, diagnosed past year with C-PTSD. I picked up Bradshaw's book at library back in the 90s but was afraid to read it and do the work. Wasn't ready to acknowledge that those I loved and adored could do so much damage to me. It's my mission to all the beautiful, smart, amazing inner children that still reside inside to love them unconditionally, forever. All the best on your journey to heal.
I feel like I have moved through every single one of these types throughout my life. As soon as one stops working or Ive exhausted myself I'll go to another. I over achieved early on in life and attracted narcissistic personalities and took uppers. Which led to exhaustion, depression and addiction to pain relievers. I never feel comfortable in my body. Im 42 years old and still havent figured it out.
Pain is the royal road to a Higher Power.
How is that happens,it's painful like my heart breaking to accept reality, really hard
I've been diving back into Pete's books since being re traumatized last year. I take away something new every time I read them.
Dear Pete Walker, your book is one of my all times favorites and helped me so much. Thank you very much for your work. I am about to reread it and start writing Down my story because I believe that it Will be therapeutic (not for anyone Else to see) God bless you ❤🤗
Pete Walker is a gift to us all
I'm going to get Pete's book. He's speaking my language and I think this would absolutely help me on my journey.
Within a few months of my father's death, the gates began to open. I learned that being abused was what was wrong- not with me but what was done to me. I'm changing the tape I lived with for 5 and a 1/2 decades. He's been gone for 4 years. I'm still healing and have a ways to go. That's ok because I'm on the right path now, and he can't get to me.
You guys doing this here on TH-cam because the lifesaver in regards to the isolation we're all experiencing from COVID. Thank you so much 🙏🙏💞💞
Thank you so much, I sat in the rooms of AA dying inside for over 10 years because even saying the word trauma in the rooms is considered "therapy speak" and is lookes down on.
I went for years too. Blaming & digging what I have done to others. Ended up in Sue It Cide Anonymous. I don't belong there either and they let me talk. Ideation of dying was with me at 1st drink. Still there 40+ years later. I am NOT alone. I am talking about this honestly at meetings. I was told don't ever say that, you'll scare the new comer.
Im just finishing your complex PTSD book, the last 10 pages. Thank you. I'm going to start it again when I'm finished. I like reading these type books at least twice if not three times.
Oh this reminds me I want to make a catharsis list, there are certain pieces of media I’ve always connected with that let me have that kind of “for me” cry and it would be nice to have them on hand in a pinch
Thank you both for an excellent presentation on a very important subject. Great to see Pete Walker in person and love his book!
I think this one of the best interviews yet with Pete. Really impressed, inspired. This has made me realize what iv been missing on this mission to recovery. I made some progress that was really something then its like a few steps back and it seemed like that was a one time thing. But hearing this encourages me to give it another go like its the first time doing it.
"Fairness is a fundamental part of initimacy" 37:14 - wow that just hit the nail. Iv been onto the farn response understanding how narcs cant fawn : be fair, compromise from his book. So been using it as a system to make boundaries with narcs but fact that its core piece to connection! That just explains a lot. It even explains why iv been the way iv been to ppl that habitually practise unfairness to me. Damn. Im in the teaching industry and there is nothing worse than a narc as they will act like there goal is to learn, even believe it but there action is manipulate, that is no1 goal and it all them, nothing personal. But also key to stopping them in their tracks...
I feel like I’m fawn then fight, but the fight is always at me. Like, when I’m fawning nothing else exists, meeting other people’s needs feels good and right and doing anything to upset their expectations means I am inherently a bad person and wrong and am in danger of my life, I’m in a state of anticipation and notice and execution with little access to myself, I will have limited access to my own memories or visualizing the future and even remembering things I am extremely knowledgable on will seem out of reach unless I have a tangent or connection to cue me in on, it’s such a malaise state that was a fantastic way to put it.
But also, when it doesn’t work, when I try my hardest to not upset someone and they still get upset anyway, I explode inward, a barrage of “what did I do wrong? What did I do to deserve this pain? I tried so hard to be good why am I still being attacked how do I fix this?”
Like I never get angry at the other person. I get angry at myself for not completely putting the other person at ease. I get mad at myself for not making myself clear enough, for not approaching it with enough tact or kindness, *I must be the problem here* and then I have to stop myself from trying to overexplain or justify or ‘make’ the other person understand because that’s a whole ass other trap to get into that just makes them feel aggressed and misunderstood so that will just drive up the shame even further yayy
This video has done something very deep for me it has set me free from the negative mental shackles I’ve been held in for over 24 years. everything has been put into perspective I am thankful and appreciative! THANK YOU
Gosh, Pete Walker in the flesh (well, on screen). Thank you Sir, for all you have helped me with.
Pete would you also consider doing an interview re: your book the Tao of Fully Feeling?
Thank you Pete for your work. It has changed my life!
Covid made me feel infinitely more connected to people, everyone stayed in touch more and people came together across distances more. It's strange to mourn the loss of an era that included so much death and illness at the very same time. But for those who were already struggling with social isolation and chronic health issues that curtailed energy for social outings, suddenly we were not weird or alone - we were normal.
When I was young, although my mum was bipolar, my dad was a narcissist. I prayed that man would die. He walked out when I was a teenager, and we begged my mum to change the locks she wouldn't. At 66, I now have an understanding of what we as a family were undergoing. I don't know if I will ever recover. My doctor even admits she doesn't know if there are counselling services for CPTSD. SO I watch TH-cam to understand myself and grieve for a wasted life.
Is it possible that at bottom of many (the majority of?) society's ADHD, BPD, SUD, etc diagnoses we have societally is actually undiagnosed CPTSD?
The reason I ask should be obvious to anyone who's thought about these things and/or who took seriously what Pete Walker says discusses in the first quarter of this video.
This is exactly what I believe. BPD, NPD, ADHD etc are just manifestations of trauma or CPTSD. Depending on on how you act out the trauma depends on what diagnosis you get. But beneath it all, it’s CPTSD
@@juleslloyd9162
Agreed ❤
Yes. In the book he mentions at the beginning how the DSM-IV would be extremely thin if CPTSD were taken into account.
NPD is different level. You can work to recover from/minimize CPTSD, how one recover from NPD, to be who? 3 year old? There's nobody there beneath the mask of false self. Walking, talking zombie, the child that mentally and emotionally died due to early abuse.
I am just repeating prof Vaknin here.
HE~~~~IS~~~~BLOWING~~~~MY~~~~MIND! I want to make affirmative tapes that copy what he is sayin to his inner critic AND PLAY THEM to MINE! As if I have him as a BACK-UP!
Love you Pete … One of the best there is xxx
I'm experiencing alot of the things that spoken about during this video. 12 step program is helping me look at my people, places and things. Now that I surrender to alot of the steps to flow thru my life is much better. But im just seeing the true light at the end of the tunnel. I know my life has more depth so I'm going yo keep digging.
Pete walker is wonderful.
It’s so overwhelming. When I try to apply that technique for the inner critic that’s all I’ll be doing. My thoughts are so caustic and hateful towards myself that I have to be vigilant all the time. And I can’t be because it’s exhausting. Then it all comes back and I start over, only to get overwhelmed again. After years of trying to find healing I am at the point where I am giving up. I can feel it happening and it’s terrible.
Excellent, excellent, excellent!! This helps me grow and soooo many others also.
Why did this just seem like an interesting topic and here I am listening while cleaning and crying on a Thursday. Ok need to order this book
This information has changed my life And as I listen again on Thanksgiving 2023 I am so thankful I didn't believe the cv19 propaganda. My precocious Inner Child rebelled. Asked the big Question "Is it True?", or in my family "REALLY????". I was fooled. Not fooled anymore. I am liberal & see the scapegoating of the trumpers or rightwing just as bad as family shit. I walked away. #WalkAway. I may have lost my fake friends but have that inner child back. I won't leave her. Great Book, more is being revealed.
Yet, the Trumpers were the ones who told all the “in denial” liberals…that the plandemic was propaganda.
Both sides equally scapegoat.
I didn't know I had abandonment wounds until I heard Pete explain what it was. Not being special ( my brother was my mother's golden child ) and I had no one to go to for my emotionsl needs. I remember being sexually molested at home by an older cousin, but couldn't tell either parent about it. I also became a fawner, a doormat and people pleaser, my mothers personal slave, denied possibilities, ended up marrying a narc and my abandonment wounds got triggered each time he threatened to leave, by the absence of intimacy and emotional availability in the 25 yr marriage. How do I even begin to heal?
Thank you both so much ! 💖💐
5:20 Fawn Response
Gifted child, belonging by being helpful, servile, becomes codependent, susceptible to narcissistic people
"Trauma of the Gifted Child" book
Genius
Haven't been able to cry in over 3 years . 1thing that's caused problems. I'm told constantly that I have no empathy
We have a lonely country. People stay away from ea other like the plague. We have an epidemic of loneliness, the medical profession is in the dark ages when it comes to trauma and you can’t find a therapist. So tell me this, what are my chances of ever having a productive life when I can barely hold down a job.
I have been screwed up by dr too. I am taking my life back also. And I am old.
This fellow Pete Walker is extremely clear in describing the content of his book....psychoeducation being a very important part of it....and he talks about this. Really a magnificent interview! So helpful!!
Refreshing to hear a more balanced perspective on ClownShoes-19. A population traumatized by their own families is ripe for deliberately administered mass trauma. (Did family narcissism develop in response to prior mass trauma?) Luckily the solution remains the same for any level of that fractal, regardless of whether it was the chicken or the egg first -- know thyself.
Non existent illness, non existent danger.
Maybe Pete is a gov monkey like the rest.
given the lack of professional governance in many countries, I have trouble believing that all of a sudden the competence necessary to create such a plot emerged. I tend to believe in a chain of worsening incompetence in that regard
For the feeling thing.. Holotropic breathwork works like nothing else. The results are off the charts addictions HEALED poof gone in a couple sessions.
Thank you❤
Your video is very interesting, but its level of sound is very low. So, please, pay attention to this aspect in the future. Thanks in advance. 🌹😇🌹
I was stalked for three years by a person that did not ever meet me... he was obsessed and dangerous. I tried to hide this from the people that I love most. I thought that I might be responsible... although I did not know why. I did not want my children and grand children to be harmed by this person. THREE years day and night... I tried to keep this from them. My life has been destroyed. I am now 73 years old ... I am totally isolated!!!
I have a neural pathway that flashes on this, "My needs are not going to be met, my needs are not going to be met, "on repeat. Age 46 Jacob's ladder style
Core Transformation is a book about NLP specifically for rewiring. You can borrow it through your local library and apply it to yourself. Or, if you can afford, have somebody apply it to you. But it works either way =)
Why isn’t just called PTS . Why must, Disorder be attached. I have known for 40 years that I have PTS but I will never attach the disorder bit. It’s like telling prisoners of war that because they are/where prisoners ,It’s their fault now that you’re going through all this bullshit, you now have to ware the badges of being disordered.
Disorder has a negative connotation to you when in reality it’s a word to define a common set of symptoms caused a particular thing or set of things. The thing in this case being PTS. So ptsd is a known set of symptoms shared by people after (post) experiencing traumatic stress. It doesn’t have to carry a negative connotation unless you assign that to it. And calling it PTS doesn’t describe the symptoms, it only names the cause.
@@jond7382 No, the word literally means "out of order." Something that is not the way it should be. This implies that people with a disorder are not the way they should be. I would suggest that PTS is a natural and normal response to extreme violence, and therefore people with PTS are not in any way disordered. They responded appropriately to the extreme situation they were put through. This doesn't mean PTS is something to accept and cling to (who the hell would want to), but it avoids the common stigmatisation and blaming of victims that is implied in the language.
We should instead say that violent behaviour is a disorder, to which healthy people respond by developing PTS. But that would be inconvenient for the people who rule society through extreme violence, wouldn't it? Can't have honest language around violence in a militaristic oligarchy.
The disorder comes later when you are safe but still actively going through the same emotions and feelings and thoughts. PTS would be for the initial reaction and then PTSD for the life long disorder that the original trauma can cause. That's the way I see it
@@danieldanton1129 Still. It apportions blame on the suffering persons by informing them that they are disordered. And by the same token will feel guilt. That’s how I see it . But thanks for your input.
I always felt PTSR (R as in response) was more appropriate
great info
How to we forgive ourselves for hurting others? And having so much deep regret and remorse? I’m suicidal everyday in this regard 😢😢😢😢
The testing is so wrong, please correct it, so that People that dont know a lot from befor can understand, and not missunderstand and get confused ❤
So exhausting
accept the fact this world is not safe there are lots evil selfish greedy ppl some even pretend to be a kind person someone they are not but there are still loving caring kind ppl. i have learn my lesson to not give love or care about ppl don't love themselves anymore. if u wanna give love to the world just donate to food bank give change to homeless ppl. the past is the past u can't change the past u r not a kid anymore u r safe. a happy life is made up of love peace and joy. if no one loves u love yrself any external love from others r blessings. to have peace just stay away from any narcissists. to have joy find hobby that u enjoy to do it's very lucky if u love yr job that's a blessing. wish everyone a wonderful happy life filled with love peace and joy.
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I’m experiencing mania now after a couple of days of depression. I really don’t now how to control it. I get very irritated as well
If there was adequate emotional support, you will be ok. Often our parents did not have emotional safety let alone support. It is no one's fault...
Do you have a video for 13 year-old? Her mother died from an overdose 2 years ago. She is suffering. How do I reach her? I also have severe CPTSD. Isolation has worked for me. Well sort of. Now I have to take care of my own grief and pain to be able to help her be safe in her body and her mind. HELP
20:21 feel safe (flash backs)
How can I get this book in Australia?
I literally cannot do the fawn response Im too angry inside
I'm fight flight or freeze it's usually fight and then freeze and be stuck in Perpetual depression until the next fight put on always trying to figure out the flight
what do you do when your critic .starts being an outer critic
If you have CPTSD does not mean you become an addict or get diagnosed with mental illness. You might end up in therapy for because you feel something if off but not get diagnosed with what you are talking about.
But is borderline the same as CPTS??
BPD in my opinion is caused by CPTSD. Along with many many personality disorders and mental health issues
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I love Pete's work and have found his books very useful as a therapist. However, I really think he should steer clear of bringing politics into his interviews. At one point he refers to "Trumpian thinking" and also says that people are more evolved in the coastal (democratic) regions of the US. This strikes me as being arrogant and dismissive of all of those who do not follow left wing thinking. It reminds me of Hilary Clinton referring to these people as "the deplorables". I would advise Pete to stick to what he is good at and keep his political opinions to himself, thus avoiding the polarising that he talks about.
I believe there are 5 FFFFFs maybe 6_ as I have experienced them. From the fight,flight,freeze,fauwn,fu (scream and tell anyone who listens as the abuser sadistically torture u) fu gives the flying monkeys terror in the system_ so the other roles comply. The sixth F is a spiritual wound that goes beyond the abandonment _ I experienced this as a wound where the abuser sacrifices u to satan_ essentially the abuser tries to steel your soul for satan. This is when I learned there really is a God.I figured out that they can take everything from me_ but they can never take my relationship with God or my relationship with myself. I could see gow to make them happy by going miserable and then go find something happy to do. I cant believe how much of this abuse me as a child could handle and still be alive.
I love that additional FFFFFFFFFs. Yes. ShitShow podcast lets the FU fly. I love it.
Feel like the mask and police questions were out of place. Odd
I don't trust anyone using the number 13.
I feel defective..senseless living..
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Hey Pete 😂
It's curious to me that many vaccinated perople, that i know, were spreading covid to family members and friends . while I, as an unvaccinated individual, who when i did contract covid, presumbly at a funeral, did not as far I am aware infect anyone else. I must have had a very low viral load (yes, that is a real thing) because I was around lots of people that I know for three days straight before I became symptomatic and subsequently tested positive. Truth is essential, not so much political affiliation.
I'm unva xx ed, and I've had it a bunch of times by this point, and no one I'm close to has ever caught it from me. It's gotten progressively weaker with each new infection to where it was barely noticeable the last time I had it.