Love how the guests are always taken aback with your off the cuff exploration & lines of questioning. You can tell you're not just firing a list of questions at them with no processing. I appreciate your openness too. Makes for a relatable & interesting listen. All the best.
We can’t really expect men to be more emotionally available. Because we are men. For the most part, it’s just who we are. Plus, through a lot of guys practical observation, women tend to friendzone the guys who are emotionally available. So, it’s not really incentivized.
This is how I see it. Unless there is some major intent on both parties to work together to have a great relationship. Most of us will be going from LTR/STR to LTR/STR. For me the ultimate relationship would be Heavy duty affection/Interesting Conversations and Laughs/Planning out and social/recreational activities. Mixed with light weight affection/basic conversation/Chillin with each other. Conflict resolutions orientated/Giving each other space/Flexable/Basic acceptance on where we are at in life. I am 52. I don't want kids. I want to live in a Condo. Work out/See Concerts/Travel.
her only experience is the top ten percent possibility even higher so her experience will be she never really had a boyfriend as many many females were also love bombing whom ever she was.
@@DanFeldmanAgileProjectManager that is very true. Females mate value drops significantly when the fertility window closes. A provider seeks characteristics of a nurturer, and these are important values in a mate. A childless woman who lacks the ability to produce a child and not in a relationship will find it more difficult to get a partner. Since it is a my way or the highway approach, it lacks compassion and is assertive. That is not an attractive characteristic for a female to possess when seeking a partner. In my marriage of 18+ years I have only had to set hard boundaries twice. These were pivotal moments within the relationship. I am happy for my wife to be independent, but the responsibility is in my hands. With authority comes responsibility.
Another outstanding conversation that has opened my eyes to the degrees of difficulty finding a partner. I got married at 28 to a woman who was 30 and the only criteria we were both looking for was love ❤️. We have grown more and more in love with each other as the years have past. I now understand that we are the 1% of forever couples out there after listening to this. I’m blessed 🙏🏼
Sounds like a true, real marriage. Not conditional and you truly have love for one another. The two become one and make each other better people. Enrich each others lives. What marriage should be.
Danica. Love your podcasts. As a fellow podcaster I really admire how you are always so present in the conversation. So good!! Also as a divorced guy with the little ones these shows are so helpful to me. Thank you for what you do 🙏
I'm new to the podcast. This is only my second one. But I really enjoyed them. You're a good interviewer who really takes the subject matter to heart and thinks of questions that not only apply to you, but that are prevalent in society.
David M. Buss answers all questions as nicely as possible. He tries really hard not to offend Danica, or other successful women in their 40s. At one Diana realizes, that he described her s*xual strategy in the past. Her success does not help her in the Datingmarket. Anyway: He makes it clear, that men have the burden of performance. Men are status objects, women are beauty objects.
@@wyleecoyotee4252 and that is the problem. Women have the hard work to maintain beauty and femininity. Guys have the hard work to maintain their social status and growing live performance value. Sadly doesn’t happen. Visit your next hs reunion and get depressed.
This is just another great interview. As a 56 year divorced man I have thought much about this topic. There are so many ways I could comment. The biggest problem I have is ladies my age are married and a refuse to be a homewrecker. The single ones are have been in such financial messes they just want me to fix them. Now I’m on a spiritual quest similarly to your own, so finding ladies that are spiritual has been impossible. My latest perceived issue has been I’ve lost a lot of wait. I look like a retired football player. I’m out not willing to just settle.
I think you need to stop focusing on looks and finances. If you are 56, you should be more enlightened at this point in your life. Don't look at women to marry. You are way past marriage age. Look at women as people to have in your life who you can just be friends with and share activities with.
@@redrock740 interesting. My life is fine. I’m not interested in chasing anyone Young or old. I just enjoy supporting some creators. Funny thing I quit watching Danica awhile ago because of all the trolls from her feed.
Incels is not only a male issue. Many women are also incels and in fact it was a women who created the term to describe herself. We are not ‘intimidated’ by successful women, we just don’t want to argue about everything, regardless of how minor the issue is. I have dated successful women and have ended the relationships due to the constant conflict over the most mundane issues. And the reality is that most women want a dominant man otherwise they develop contempt for the man and leave him.
Danica, your streak of outstanding content continues...Spot on observations, but his analysis doesn't consider matrix programming. Where he's talking about how our mating behavior "evolved", aren't all those phenomena a result of the programming that caused our departure from our natural ways as a result of a social agenda?
Regarding the issue of men being "intimidated" by women who are more assertive/masculine, reversing the scenario sheds a little light on this subject. Would you say that women are "intimidated by" or "can't handle" a man that is more passive/feminine? No, most would simply acknowledge the fact that most women do not find passive/feminine men attractive. They are much more attracted to masculine men. The same is true of men. Most men are attracted to feminine women, and they are turned off by assertive/masculine women in the same way that most women are turned off by passive/feminine men. It is just that our current culture encourages women to have these preferences and labels men as "sexist" for having the same preferences.
Danica's intelligence is so appealing. She clearly puts alot of prep into every interview in order for her viewers to learn from the podcast and for herself.
This is a great conversation. It only proves that there is a razor's edge of the population that can be truly happy . Its depressing .3 married times twofailed. Theone that iwas happiest I lost my "soulmate" to cancer. My happiness now is my friends, my fantasies and my dog. D.G.K.
I know this sounds odd but I am glad I am older now. With society in flux (confusing), choosing what to do with our time becomes even more important. Interesting guest and comments from both guest and host. Challenges are fun and a big part of living. I feel that it flips some after age 40 or 45.
Regarding how women want men who are in touch with their emotions and able to be intimately connected but also not viewed as weak. The objective is the same regardless of gender. That’s is: emotional intelligence is being sensational in one’s body as a non judgmental observer for self assessing and ultimately having understanding and wisdom to take responsibility and action for oneself BEFORE pointing the finger or demanding response from others as a soothing mechanism. While this is not the totality of EI, when this becomes common place for humans, we will experience more ideal balance of masculine & feminine energies and dynamics as individuals and coexisting beings. We are learning. Thank you for reading.
I know some men of 58- 60 years old who don't want to work and spend 4 hours a day sitting at the food court . All have never been married, no girlfriend, no children and living at home with mum and dad . Wasted lives .
Wasted lives is a bit harsh. Since you don't know their trauma nor their sources of meaning. Just by taking care of their parents and being company for others is enough to not consider a life wasted in my opinion. I've been a lone for my entire life now at 35 years old and depressed for most of it but I still can't fully get behind that it was all wasted. I've missed out on that fundamental human experience for sure but there is still inherit value in every human being.
2 points that stood out were 1. Dr Buss' comments on emotional stability being absolutely key to a long term relationship and 2. women's emotions (e.g. they tend to see the world as mint, teal, Christmas tree rather than just green, and needing a roller coaster 50 shades of grey novel rather than just needing a 5 minute hardcore scene). Both these things, unfortunately, seem to be antagonistic.
Interesting conversation, and somewhat daunting if you are in the dating world. Is it my imagination or have things gotten a lot more complicated between men and women. I didn’t realize that was possible. I love independent strong women. It’s amazing how many men are challenged by it. In my opinion, cheating is a result of something lacking in a relationship or lacking in the character of the person. We’re human beings and we’ll always find people outside of our mates attractive. That doesn’t mean we act on it. It’s called impulse control and knowing that sex is never worth jeopardizing a beautiful relationship. I suppose that may be why there is such a huge shift toward Swinging and open relationships. I live in a relatively “ conservative” town and it’s rampant.
Though I am only into this podcast 30 minutes, what is not being discussed here nor most other discussions on this topic is what value do women bring to a relationship. It is always what do men do for women. Maybe men are walking away from relationships because we are seen as nothing more than a wallet to women regardless of how successful the woman is. As a successful man, I see no reason to get into a LTR because other than regular sex what else do I gain compared to everything I have to lose?
Generally speaking, a man's currency is his wallet and a women's currency is her body, e.g. intimacy and birthing your kids. If you are a guy who does not want intimacy with 1 women for the next 50 years and you do not want kids, a woman cannot really bring anything to the table. Either way, DO NOT GET MARRIED. Divorce is ruthless. You will get screwed on everything, e.g. division of assets, legal fees, alimony, child custody, child support, etc etc.
It's a good point and I think terribly shallow if women are prioritizing wallets and positions held. I realize that these studies, by necessity, have to generalize somewhat but can assure you there are still woman out there who are not at all interested in what is in a man's wallet or the position he holds. It is vastly more important to me that there's connection and a shared philosophy about values in the relationship/what each person wants.
Yeah, more & more single gals out there don't have to look so good or be such a standout...they got tinder & plenty of fish type apps where these guys are literally throwing themselves at them. I get it, but now it's just a "well who's got the best offer for me" instead of who's more compatible for me. At least that's my opinion.
As brilliant as this conversation is.. It's made me think.. 🤔 Seems the difference in thoughts between the sexes I'm more polarised towards female thinking. I've seen sex and the dating game by people's to be very narcissistic. Wanting nothing to do with this nor have the desire to be with someone who is busy on the dating sites, I've resorted to being a crazy old cat man. I'm not worried someone's cheating on me. Ironically I was dumped once for not being jealous. At 45 I've never been in a two way loving relationship. This reality is inverted so maybe all this toxic love or lack of it is the lesson. I've had one sexual partner in a decade and that experience put me off. It's an energy connection and that connection blinded minds can't comprehend. Big up to the beautiful single people 💪🏻
Ya it gets to a point were it all gets exhausting im 46 been married once and engaged once made alot of bad choices in relationships but thats on me. I just dont think I wanna start over again relationships wise its not really worth it.
@@daryl9799 Totally get that and the same. Similar to Danica i was married in that relationship for almoat ten years then 3 2 1. When you open up only to have a pathologically nasty person use that against you. I've had enough of selfish people. Basically i wasted a decade but got 100 lifetimes of wisdom. Red flag Radar as full power.
Great episode!!!! I broke up with a girlfriend because she got fat. I told her she had to lose the weight or I was gone. After a year and a half, trying to get her to work out, swim, walk, bike, lift weights, eat better, eat less she didn't lose any weight. I walked in the front door after a long hard day at work and she was shoveling donuts in her mouth.....I took a shower and started packing my bags. I told her guys like looking at pretty things and when you put on 40lbs you're not pretty to me anymore.
The explanation of these topics are very interesting, it's like reading "back in the day" Playboy magazine feedback and discussion of worldly matters. 🙂
Danica, fly out to Newport Beach! I'll take you put on a Non-Romantic date, lol! I'm not intimidated by success, and am writing a new philosophy for Singles called While We Wait For Love as well as The NEW Friend Zone. The first deals with focusing on continual self improvement while the second focuses on learning how to be friends with people before jumping into relationships. I am a Vet/Prior Christian Missionary and Paramedic. Come to Newport Beach, and we can go paddleboarding. I won't be triggered, and I do not get triggered by success
Danica and David don't understand one key component: It's not that men want uneducated, unsuccessful women. It's just that we don't care about degrees or status on women. It's really that simple. I know it sounds like insecurity, but that's because we look at it on a very surface level. Same as women not caring about a man's Star Wars collection. The main reason men are put off by high status women is that they operate and navigate life basically as men. They're assertive, feisty, kinda aggressive. Attractive traits on a successful man but not on a woman. Men are attractive to the girl next door archetype. No matter how progressive society is, we're the same at an instinctual level. Nobody likes to talk about the nature of polarities, and that's where the problem with today's relationship lies.
💯 spot on about the autism spectrum problem. Even has a "physically attractive" male that's been my biggest obstacle, whether it's with employment, getting through school or retaining relationships. I've overcome many of my symptoms, nonetheless it's still a problem at the age of almost 39.
Ultimately we are all looking for a relationship that adds positively and complementary to a partnership. Instead of settling for a complicated relationship built on the trauma and drama of the past that repeats in relationship patterns that are unwholesome. I just recently meet a women that has similar higher vibrational emotional stability that complements my self work and our connection, compassion, and love is unexpected in its effortless manifestation.
Thanks, Danica and David . I love that you covered so much territory and still went deeper when necessary. I love your concept of an official public ceremony to broadcast to the world that, we are indeed 'going steady' but not legally married.
This was another great convo. I truly feel people are getting stuck trying to put the masculine and feminine into the boxes of men and women, regarding how to find answers according to the traditional man-women stereotypes and statistics. The truth is that we can all have masculine or feminine qualities to different degrees from many variables at any given moment and who is to say that you can't be a masculine woman or a feminine man to some higher degree and not be gay, or trans, or confused. I think women that are strong like Danica don't need or even want a traditional strong man so to speak. For example....A woman sees a child cry and she gets emotional. The next day, a man sees a child cry and he gets emotional. These are polarities that come and go based on MANY moment-to-moment factors, and there is no KEY TO DANICA OR ANYONE FINDING THE PERFECT MATCH of polarity per say. In the end, there can only be understanding, and communication and sometimes yes....relationships can be magical with this allowance and awareness and feel like the perfect match. IT'S LITERALLY ONE DAY AT A TIME. THE ENERGY IS ALWAYS SHIFTING AND INTEGRATING AND CHANGING. "TO KNOW THAT IS TO FLOW THAT." CAN I COIN THAT PHRASE FOR A MILLION OR 2? LOL... PERHAPS UNDERSTANDING that a woman or a man doesn't need to fit in the statistical boxes could very well be how we are all evolving to higher levels of compatibility in all relationships. DANICA, PERHAPS YOU REALLY WANT A SENSITIVE MAN, TO BALANCE YOUR MASCULINE SIDE WITHOUT TRYING TO CHANGE YOU OR HIM AT ALL. You may have to remove some programming if that is really what you desire and can appreciate. GREAT PODCAST... THANK YOU BOTH!
@@wyleecoyotee4252 Didn't say that. I said, she wants a sensitive man to balance her masculine side. I could say "she may want" also. But I believe I have illustrated my point there. I think her masculine race car side is awesome and the fact that she is also very sensitive and feminine is equally awesome. DUALITY
The fact that Danica was so taken aback and surprised by the reasons why men sleep with people other than their partners shows how much progress as society we still have to make. I don't know the best way of educating women that their is ZERO correlation for men between looking outside a relationship and the strength of the relationship itself, it is PURELY a physical transaction. It's no reflection on the woman at all.
Yes, that is why a lot of men are secretly gay. It is a physical transaction, and they have discovered it is a better experience with other men, than with women.
He is absolutely correct that Danika is in my opinion in the top 3% of all single eligible women. Success, beauty, intelligence, fit, emotional stability. All hard to find in that combination these days.
Valuable information and insights presented here. Danica, your questions demonstrated your intellect, critical thinking and reasoning skills and your open mind and heart. As far as the subject matter, on another 'level" I believe we are witnessed in real time the dissolution of the the patriarchy and a more balanced masculine/feminine future for HumanKind. With that dissolution comes considerable chaos but we are on target for a better world for men, women and children. This will take some time. ;-) The "shift" is in play, the game is afoot, let us have at it!
theres only one way a relationship can work.. thats with 100 percent honesty... it garunteed to be a rollercoaster but its the only way a relationship can have source energy in it
For a woman, not all, the sexual experience builds around her emotions, the need to be desired, the recognition of feminine beauty and appreciation of her, even a man who can tap into her emotional intelligence. Having the intellectual skill sets to access these women could make a difference because women control the sex and all things being equal can create a cornucopia of variety. Plus, with the advent of sexual props, tools, equipment women tend to default to their sock drawer rather than a man as there is dissatisfaction of available suitors. Selectivity matters as the sexual marketplace continues to evolve.
I completely understand where Dr. Buss is coming from, but what about the educated guys that can’t find a mate. Why is it all about the guys faults and no talk about the women? A lot of great women out there, but it’s hard to find a chick that is curious about life and loves to read. So much superficial narcissism out there. A lot of these women it’s hard to even hold an intellectual conversation with. We are multidimensional beings as well…. We want depth just as much as anything else. Just seems like I’m the Instagram age it’s getting harder and harder to find women that can hold a conversation past gossip and surface level conversations… there are men out there that are really trying! The majority is stuck on their phones. We can all do better… And why is this all about monetary value? What about happiness in their job and career? I know plenty of millionaires that are miserable in both ways of gender… just seems like a stereotype. At the end of the day love is love and connection is connection. I love academia but it seems so bias and the examples are in the extremes. What about the wealth and privileged that don’t do what high grant did. Sexual variation could also mean being not happy within. Seems like his hypothesis is half baked… Would love to talk with Dr. Buss and learn more. So many questions. I’m not right, I just would like a more nuanced view. As Patrice says men are equivalent to fast food for women. A dime a dozen and on every corner. They are in control and men act and react accordingly. At the end of the day everyone wants to be loved, but our realities are extremely different from one another. Wish I could be Dr. Buss’s student and learn more from him and his research.
It seems to me that, Danica, and I could be incorrect, holds the idea in her mind that because she has “ options” ( we all do regardless of mating status) that it’s somehow ok to ditch the current relationship that’s not at the time fulfilling. David belabored the point of emotional stability in a relationship is what keeps the relationship stronger ( healthy) for longer ( happy). Obviously, Danica is jaded, perhaps rightfully so, however i thinks it’s a bad mix when someone uses “ options” as a guideline to excuse themselves from a relationship and their jaded and their emotional stability has been depleting. I think losing the mindset of “ I have options” and replenishing emotions stability added with having a list of reg flags and triggers from past relationships can make the difference for Danica.
Great topic as always! With regard to marriage, I would have been interested in what the trend is worldwide and not just in the U.S. I feel like since the institute of marriage was created by religion, you may see trends are different depending on the culture.
I have lived all over the world and often heard this ruling of thumb regarding the perfect age for a woman for a man. It was divide the man’s age in half and add 6 or 7. Depending on the country. For example a 40 old man should date and marry a 26 or 27 year old woman. I do not know what it is based on. Maturity development in the genders. Possibly financial security of a older man. Just thought it was interesting how this rule of thumb was heard in so many different countries.
Hey D, this is a great interview. I am a guy and don't really get interested in this kind of discussion usually. But I love your show, so i gave it a chance. Of course to keep the discussion brief, your guest had to use a lot of generalizations. And due to him being around 60 years old, I would guess that his conclusions are based on many years of observation. Cool, but also what I see as a disadvantage for some of the speculations which he presents. Because, in My Speculation, I would say that many of the current issues involving female and male coupling and compatibility are not so much based on the old genetic stereotypical patterns. But rather I would say that the largest major negative issue is the External Manipulation by an out of control western culture. Hyper-Consumerism, Population Control psychological biasing, Intoxicating Capitalism, and the fact that all free feel good things have either been destroyed or bought by the Corporations and sold in a sterile marketed form which leaves no lasting fulfillment. Also Tik-Tok, video games, etc have helped to lower attention spans to the point where real relationships seem like "just to damn much work" for the average consumer. And that is really the crux of it here in La La Land, we have been raised as Consumers and real physical relationships hold about as much emotional value as the relationships that we have (sold to us by big Corps) with products such as TV stars, Musicians, TH-cam hosts, Video Game Avatars, etc... I don't have the solution except to say that when you find another human that makes you feel special, never let go! ;)
Danica I’m 40 I just want to say I’m in the same boat as you in the sense that I don’t know if I am meant to be a mother but there are universal mothers and you are definitely universally healing so many souls. I just want you to know I think that you would be an extraordinary mother for a child but if you end up having animals a whole world is gonna be blessed by your presence sorry for blowing up your thread love you
Oh my gosh Danica I’m so honored to learn about who you are through your videos. I found you about a month ago and I am addicted to watching you because you are truly a very wonderful woman. My mother was wonderful but she really neglected me so I often manifest men that are great but they kind of don’t show up in the way that I know I am capable of receiving attention it is so intense to transcend all of that and I love hearing you be so real and expressive about where you have come from I resonate. Thank you
DANICA MOTHER ATE PODE FALIR PORQUE TUDO AGORA DANICA E SEXO NO MATINHO NA ESQUINA NA BEIRA DA ESTRADA DENTRO DO CARRO DENTRO DO ONIBUS TREM AVIÃO PRA QUE MOTHER SE ATE EM CINEMA SE FAZ SEXO EM TODOS OS LUGARES E ATE EM BAILES . DE DANÇA #
Both are trapped, but the fact is that beyond a certain age there is not much opportunity. Yes, you can leave, but then you will simply be alone with next to no prospect of finding another partner again. And let's say you find another partner, chances are that they left a similar relationship behind that you had with your first wife or husband. So now you have two jaded people with tons of baggage in a "romance". What do you expect to happen? Romeo and Juliet? High school sweethearts 2.0? No, of course not. You will have two bitter people fighting for every bit of real estate in the new relationship because they are both afraid of ending in the same trap, again. That is what happens on average. It's not a new beginning. It's merely a repeat psychodrama of the first failures. On average it is much, much better to find a workable arrangement in the original marriage, assuming that it was built on love in the first place. If it wasn't, then all hope is lost. Everybody is in a loveless place and will remain there.
The fact that Danica “thinks like a guy” in a woman’s body is a big part of what is making it difficult for her to understand both the female and the male side of the equation. Simultaneously, this psychological stance also can help her to build a communication bridge between the sexes as long as she understands that she is an outlier, while seeking to build empathy with a wider spectrum of female and male experiences.
I think people should really be educated by going to pre-marital counseling or reading many books before commitment and kids. Maybe women's and men's desires won't change, but awareness half solves the challenges. Understanding is so important.
I gotta say that I really appreciate this gentleman forgive me for not inserting his name. It is imperative that you do a trip with the person to not a glorious Motel you know hotel glorious place but something real and Humane to see how they respond to people on a base level.
Hey Danica, I am a new viewer. I found you while searching for Dr Steven Greer videos. So I fell in love with you right away, your beauty, humour, intelligence, curiosity, etc. Keep up the pursuit of love, and thanks for taking us along for the ride. If you want something different to read in your down time, I have a little book I self-published in 2019. Truth Phoenix by Eric Bubela. Take care and lots of love, E:)
Such an informative podcast, super relevant to what’s currently going on in dating and relationships today. Thanks Danica for shining a light on this topic!
The lessons in life that one needs to understand, lol. I love variety but if I can get it all in one package, I will pass over the variety and stick to "the one" as they call it. Until then... Enjoy your life. Thanks Danica. I like you do a lot of research btw, it shows me your hungry for life still. Cheers
a partnership of love is unquestionable loyalty to do things for and have things done the same a gift when gone can never be replaced I miss my Angel who now is an Angel such a shame so many cant get it right the first time However we are here for experience Live & let Live together
Around 1:15:00 a light came on! The reason many men don’t do well with “strong independent women” is TWO fold. SIW “don’t need a man” and we need to be needed. We have to feel useful and necessary. THEN, consider having children, owning a home together, etc. creates an environment where separation is rarely a good idea so you’re more likely to work through issues. SIW, as the lovely Ms Patrick implied, are only anchored by the measure of their own happiness. No offense to women, but I’ve yet to meet an unmarried or childless woman over 35 who’s actually happy. All things considered, it’s just not worth the effort, energy, or resources.
I like where your head is at, Danica! Communication has not been my strong suit. It takes years sometimes and therapy as well. ; ) "I just love driving fast!"
At 1:20 regarding the legal aspect of marriage and before that during the polyamorous relationship analysis, the process of raising kids was not even mentioned as if that's not the Main reason to marry.
Yes. I was 32 and had two marriages before I met the ONE for me. I had a daughter to raise whose father had died suddenly the year before. I had a new clinical psych PhD and needed to support both financially and emotionally my daughter. The man I met did not want children and had a vasectomy after his divorce right before I met him. He was 37. His plan was to play the field, he was dating 3 women when I met him...one for dinner dates, another for beach and sailing outings and a third for sex...an experienced older woman who wouldnt wrap him up i to commitment. But he said when he met me he knew he would never find anyone like me again. I on the other hand, had to be very very careful having my daughter's welfare and future at stake. I said let's date and you SHOULD date other women and I should date other men. In truth he was everything I wanted so I didnt date anyone else but I wanted HIM to be sure eg that he could be a parental figure for my child but he didnt need to support her financially I would do that. My daughter had been head over heels for her father and she didnt want anyone to take his place...no one COULD for her. We dated a year before he admitted he had dropped tge 3 other women after he met me. We wanted to be together seriously. I told him I couldnt marry him as I had to be solely financially independent. We shared joint expenses. He was tremendous. It worked out for us. I know it was harder for him than it was for me because he had counted on having no children. He taught my daughter to sail, to fly and encouraged her dreams to be a military pilot...he could not have been better to her had he been her own father...in fact he dedicated more time to her than her own father had. Our dream was to retire early and sail by the time we were 50.and 55. We accomplished that goal and she was in the military as a pilot by then. We never married... we both LIKED the idea that we chose to be together everyday....each of us was free to walk at any time no financial or legal strings attached. It was freeing for me and for him. Yet since we wanted to do all the same things in life, we accomplished all our goals together. He built us a beautiful home in the tropics after sailing. We had 25 years of retirement and he passed away a month after his 80th birthday last year.I could not have had a better life. Friends were shocked we were not married..we had been together 41 years and we never SAID we were married, people just assumed. There are lots of ways to build a happy life...marriage is but one way.
Love how the guests are always taken aback with your off the cuff exploration & lines of questioning. You can tell you're not just firing a list of questions at them with no processing. I appreciate your openness too. Makes for a relatable & interesting listen. All the best.
We can’t really expect men to be more emotionally available. Because we are men. For the most part, it’s just who we are. Plus, through a lot of guys practical observation, women tend to friendzone the guys who are emotionally available. So, it’s not really incentivized.
Props to Danica for tackling this subject, she still doesn’t really understand the struggles of the “average” guy, but she’s getting better
This is how I see it. Unless there is some major intent on both parties to work together to have a great relationship. Most of us will be going from LTR/STR to LTR/STR. For me the ultimate relationship would be Heavy duty affection/Interesting Conversations and Laughs/Planning out and social/recreational activities. Mixed with light weight affection/basic conversation/Chillin with each other. Conflict resolutions orientated/Giving each other space/Flexable/Basic acceptance on where we are at in life. I am 52. I don't want kids. I want to live in a Condo. Work out/See Concerts/Travel.
her only experience is the top ten percent possibility even higher so her experience will be she never really had a boyfriend as many many females were also love bombing whom ever she was.
Higher mate value is not just determined by wealth and status. Not sure that Danica understands this.
@@mysterio1570 E ISSO EM HIHLINGHTS ELES USA BUSANDO LA EM ESPAÇO E SEXO #
@@DanFeldmanAgileProjectManager that is very true. Females mate value drops significantly when the fertility window closes. A provider seeks characteristics of a nurturer, and these are important values in a mate.
A childless woman who lacks the ability to produce a child and not in a relationship will find it more difficult to get a partner. Since it is a my way or the highway approach, it lacks compassion and is assertive. That is not an attractive characteristic for a female to possess when seeking a partner.
In my marriage of 18+ years I have only had to set hard boundaries twice. These were pivotal moments within the relationship. I am happy for my wife to be independent, but the responsibility is in my hands.
With authority comes responsibility.
This was very interesting. Thank you Danica and David Buss.
Another outstanding conversation that has opened my eyes to the degrees of difficulty finding a partner. I got married at 28 to a woman who was 30 and the only criteria we were both looking for was love ❤️. We have grown more and more in love with each other as the years have past. I now understand that we are the 1% of forever couples out there after listening to this. I’m blessed 🙏🏼
You are indeed…
Sounds like a true, real marriage. Not conditional and you truly have love for one another. The two become one and make each other better people. Enrich each others lives. What marriage should be.
You will get divorced soon and look for a wife who is at least 15 years younger.
It's not that guys are triggered or intimidated, men don't want to deal with masculine women. Women have become the man she wants to date
Really interesting episode. Thank you for another great interview.
Danica, you are very good to interviewing. I am impressed.
Love this topic, thank you for sharing 🌎
Danica, This was an Interesting Interview. Thank You for this Video.
You're always so on point Danica 😚😍❤
You're always so point danica 😍😊❤
Fascinating content and interview, right up there!
This one was an amazing conversation. Really insightful.
Danica. Love your podcasts. As a fellow podcaster I really admire how you are always so present in the conversation. So good!! Also as a divorced guy with the little ones these shows are so helpful to me. Thank you for what you do 🙏
I'm new to the podcast. This is only my second one. But I really enjoyed them. You're a good interviewer who really takes the subject matter to heart and thinks of questions that not only apply to you, but that are prevalent in society.
David M. Buss answers all questions as nicely as possible. He tries really hard not to offend Danica, or other successful women in their 40s. At one Diana realizes, that he described her s*xual strategy in the past. Her success does not help her in the Datingmarket.
Anyway: He makes it clear, that men have the burden of performance.
Men are status objects, women are beauty objects.
The average man is NOT a status object.
Get a dose of reality
@@wyleecoyotee4252and women don't want an average man. Get a clue.
@@wyleecoyotee4252 and that is the problem. Women have the hard work to maintain beauty and femininity. Guys have the hard work to maintain their social status and growing live performance value. Sadly doesn’t happen. Visit your next hs reunion and get depressed.
Bus is a coward with politically correct discussions on attraction like most academics...
I think Danica sits around and thinks of AMAZING QUESTIONS! I really enjoy her podcast!
Yay, I always enjoy these podcasts. 😊
This is just another great interview. As a 56 year divorced man I have thought much about this topic. There are so many ways I could comment. The biggest problem I have is ladies my age are married and a refuse to be a homewrecker. The single ones are have been in such financial messes they just want me to fix them. Now I’m on a spiritual quest similarly to your own, so finding ladies that are spiritual has been impossible. My latest perceived issue has been I’ve lost a lot of wait. I look like a retired football player. I’m out not willing to just settle.
I think you need to stop focusing on looks and finances. If you are 56, you should be more enlightened at this point in your life. Don't look at women to marry. You are way past marriage age. Look at women as people to have in your life who you can just be friends with and share activities with.
@@redrock740 interesting. My life is fine. I’m not interested in chasing anyone Young or old. I just enjoy supporting some creators. Funny thing I quit watching Danica awhile ago because of all the trolls from her feed.
Incels is not only a male issue. Many women are also incels and in fact it was a women who created the term to describe herself. We are not ‘intimidated’ by successful women, we just don’t want to argue about everything, regardless of how minor the issue is. I have dated successful women and have ended the relationships due to the constant conflict over the most mundane issues. And the reality is that most women want a dominant man otherwise they develop contempt for the man and leave him.
Bem neste ponto se a Mulher gosta de ser uma Cachorra não reclama porque os dominadores são de doer viu eles gostam de uma Rabada viu 😅🤣🍑👋#
Danica, your streak of outstanding content continues...Spot on observations, but his analysis doesn't consider matrix programming. Where he's talking about how our mating behavior "evolved", aren't all those phenomena a result of the programming that caused our departure from our natural ways as a result of a social agenda?
Regarding the issue of men being "intimidated" by women who are more assertive/masculine, reversing the scenario sheds a little light on this subject. Would you say that women are "intimidated by" or "can't handle" a man that is more passive/feminine? No, most would simply acknowledge the fact that most women do not find passive/feminine men attractive. They are much more attracted to masculine men. The same is true of men. Most men are attracted to feminine women, and they are turned off by assertive/masculine women in the same way that most women are turned off by passive/feminine men. It is just that our current culture encourages women to have these preferences and labels men as "sexist" for having the same preferences.
Danica's intelligence is so appealing. She clearly puts alot of prep into every interview in order for her viewers to learn from the podcast and for herself.
Are you sure you're not just saying that bc she's HOT!?
She is clueless
This is a great conversation. It only proves that there is a razor's edge of the population that can be truly happy . Its depressing .3 married times twofailed. Theone that iwas happiest I lost my "soulmate" to cancer. My happiness now is my friends, my fantasies and my dog. D.G.K.
I know this sounds odd but I am glad I am older now. With society in flux (confusing), choosing what to do with our time becomes even more important. Interesting guest and comments from both guest and host. Challenges are fun and a big part of living. I feel that it flips some after age 40 or 45.
E DANICA EU TENHO ANOTADO TUDO NOS MINIMOS DETALHES NA INTERNET DANICA . E JA VI A OLHO NU ATRAS DA ESCOLA EM UM MURO #
Enjoyed the topics. Note :the chapter headings were for a different talk!
Regarding how women want men who are in touch with their emotions and able to be intimately connected but also not viewed as weak. The objective is the same regardless of gender. That’s is: emotional intelligence is being sensational in one’s body as a non judgmental observer for self assessing and ultimately having understanding and wisdom to take responsibility and action for oneself BEFORE pointing the finger or demanding response from others as a soothing mechanism. While this is not the totality of EI, when this becomes common place for humans, we will experience more ideal balance of masculine & feminine energies and dynamics as individuals and coexisting beings. We are learning. Thank you for reading.
This really is a great podcast top 5 for sure ty DP
Really enjoyed this conversation. Thank you 🤍
I know some men of 58- 60 years old who don't want to work and spend 4 hours a day sitting at the food court . All have never been married, no girlfriend, no children and living at home with mum and dad . Wasted lives .
Wasted lives is a bit harsh. Since you don't know their trauma nor their sources of meaning. Just by taking care of their parents and being company for others is enough to not consider a life wasted in my opinion. I've been a lone for my entire life now at 35 years old and depressed for most of it but I still can't fully get behind that it was all wasted. I've missed out on that fundamental human experience for sure but there is still inherit value in every human being.
E Danica e a sim que eu me encontro sem mulher não casei e vivo em casa com mamãe. E pior sem sexo 😢#
Danica is my favorite Podcaster beautiful smart and she can drive the crap out of a race 🏎 oh did I mention she's beautiful ❤
Can she though??
2 points that stood out were 1. Dr Buss' comments on emotional stability being absolutely key to a long term relationship and 2. women's emotions (e.g. they tend to see the world as mint, teal, Christmas tree rather than just green, and needing a roller coaster 50 shades of grey novel rather than just needing a 5 minute hardcore scene). Both these things, unfortunately, seem to be antagonistic.
Interesting conversation, and somewhat daunting if you are in the dating world. Is it my imagination or have things gotten a lot more complicated between men and women. I didn’t realize that was possible. I love independent strong women. It’s amazing how many men are challenged by it. In my opinion, cheating is a result of something lacking in a relationship or lacking in the character of the person. We’re human beings and we’ll always find people outside of our mates attractive. That doesn’t mean we act on it. It’s called impulse control and knowing that sex is never worth jeopardizing a beautiful relationship. I suppose that may be why there is such a huge shift toward Swinging and open relationships. I live in a relatively “ conservative” town and it’s rampant.
Cheaters cheat.....they cheat because they are cheaters.
Awesome conversation ❤❤❤❤
"GREETINGS"! from Machesney Park, IL!. AWESOME DISCUSSION!..
Danika, you're still young and beautiful,. Don't give up on any of your goals. Even if you weren't, you can get there at any age!
Though I am only into this podcast 30 minutes, what is not being discussed here nor most other discussions on this topic is what value do women bring to a relationship. It is always what do men do for women. Maybe men are walking away from relationships because we are seen as nothing more than a wallet to women regardless of how successful the woman is. As a successful man, I see no reason to get into a LTR because other than regular sex what else do I gain compared to everything I have to lose?
Generally speaking, a man's currency is his wallet and a women's currency is her body, e.g. intimacy and birthing your kids. If you are a guy who does not want intimacy with 1 women for the next 50 years and you do not want kids, a woman cannot really bring anything to the table. Either way, DO NOT GET MARRIED. Divorce is ruthless. You will get screwed on everything, e.g. division of assets, legal fees, alimony, child custody, child support, etc etc.
It's a good point and I think terribly shallow if women are prioritizing wallets and positions held. I realize that these studies, by necessity, have to generalize somewhat but can assure you there are still woman out there who are not at all interested in what is in a man's wallet or the position he holds. It is vastly more important to me that there's connection and a shared philosophy about values in the relationship/what each person wants.
@@luluwebdesign7854 I agree and appreciate your comment but think good women are few and far between.
Yeah, more & more single gals out there don't have to look so good or be such a standout...they got tinder & plenty of fish type apps where these guys are literally throwing themselves at them. I get it, but now it's just a "well who's got the best offer for me" instead of who's more compatible for me. At least that's my opinion.
As brilliant as this conversation is.. It's made me think.. 🤔 Seems the difference in thoughts between the sexes I'm more polarised towards female thinking. I've seen sex and the dating game by people's to be very narcissistic. Wanting nothing to do with this nor have the desire to be with someone who is busy on the dating sites, I've resorted to being a crazy old cat man. I'm not worried someone's cheating on me. Ironically I was dumped once for not being jealous. At 45 I've never been in a two way loving relationship. This reality is inverted so maybe all this toxic love or lack of it is the lesson. I've had one sexual partner in a decade and that experience put me off. It's an energy connection and that connection blinded minds can't comprehend. Big up to the beautiful single people 💪🏻
Ya it gets to a point were it all gets exhausting im 46 been married once and engaged once made alot of bad choices in relationships but thats on me. I just dont think I wanna start over again relationships wise its not really worth it.
@@daryl9799 Totally get that and the same. Similar to Danica i was married in that relationship for almoat ten years then 3 2 1.
When you open up only to have a pathologically nasty person use that against you. I've had enough of selfish people. Basically i wasted a decade but got 100 lifetimes of wisdom. Red flag Radar as full power.
Loved this podcast. David was great at explaining things, very knowledgeable., thanks much!!!
Great episode!!!! I broke up with a girlfriend because she got fat. I told her she had to lose the weight or I was gone. After a year and a half, trying to get her to work out, swim, walk, bike, lift weights, eat better, eat less she didn't lose any weight. I walked in the front door after a long hard day at work and she was shoveling donuts in her mouth.....I took a shower and started packing my bags. I told her guys like looking at pretty things and when you put on 40lbs you're not pretty to me anymore.
😂
That's fair, no point in being with a partner who you don't find attractive or doesn't share the same values as you.
The explanation of these topics are very interesting, it's like reading "back in the day" Playboy magazine feedback and discussion of worldly matters. 🙂
Thanks- this man was terrific-knowledgeable, but completely non-confrontational. The father I wish I'd had!:)
Danica knows her shizzle!
She was nodding her head and bitting her lip 29:05😂😂😂
Danica!! You're my podcast ❤
Danica Patrick...👌👍🙏
Danica, just putting it out there… I’m single, 40, no kids, and don’t mind that you make more money… 😉 lol
Danica, fly out to Newport Beach! I'll take you put on a Non-Romantic date, lol! I'm not intimidated by success, and am writing a new philosophy for Singles called While We Wait For Love as well as The NEW Friend Zone. The first deals with focusing on continual self improvement while the second focuses on learning how to be friends with people before jumping into relationships. I am a Vet/Prior Christian Missionary and Paramedic. Come to Newport Beach, and we can go paddleboarding. I won't be triggered, and I do not get triggered by success
Wow, Chris Williamson and Dr. David Buss are writing a book together? I'm buying it for sure! 📖
OBJECTS FOR FACTS # O 'S E EXCLARECEDOR #
Me too!!!
Danica and David don't understand one key component:
It's not that men want uneducated, unsuccessful women. It's just that we don't care about degrees or status on women. It's really that simple. I know it sounds like insecurity, but that's because we look at it on a very surface level. Same as women not caring about a man's Star Wars collection. The main reason men are put off by high status women is that they operate and navigate life basically as men. They're assertive, feisty, kinda aggressive. Attractive traits on a successful man but not on a woman. Men are attractive to the girl next door archetype. No matter how progressive society is, we're the same at an instinctual level. Nobody likes to talk about the nature of polarities, and that's where the problem with today's relationship lies.
I must have watched about 20 of your interviews this month. Great podcast!
💯 spot on about the autism spectrum problem. Even has a "physically attractive" male that's been my biggest obstacle, whether it's with employment, getting through school or retaining relationships. I've overcome many of my symptoms, nonetheless it's still a problem at the age of almost 39.
Ultimately we are all looking for a relationship that adds positively and complementary to a partnership. Instead of settling for a complicated relationship built on the trauma and drama of the past that repeats in relationship patterns that are unwholesome. I just recently meet a women that has similar higher vibrational emotional stability that complements my self work and our connection, compassion, and love is unexpected in its effortless manifestation.
I love Danica's view/idea on Marriage
Thanks, Danica and David . I love that you covered so much territory and still went deeper when necessary. I love your concept of an official public ceremony to broadcast to the world that, we are indeed 'going steady' but not legally married.
This was another great convo. I truly feel people are getting stuck trying to put the masculine and feminine into the boxes of men and women, regarding how to find answers according to the traditional man-women stereotypes and statistics. The truth is that we can all have masculine or feminine qualities to different degrees from many variables at any given moment and who is to say that you can't be a masculine woman or a feminine man to some higher degree and not be gay, or trans, or confused. I think women that are strong like Danica don't need or even want a traditional strong man so to speak. For example....A woman sees a child cry and she gets emotional. The next day, a man sees a child cry and he gets emotional. These are polarities that come and go based on MANY moment-to-moment factors, and there is no KEY TO DANICA OR ANYONE FINDING THE PERFECT MATCH of polarity per say. In the end, there can only be understanding, and communication and sometimes yes....relationships can be magical with this allowance and awareness and feel like the perfect match. IT'S LITERALLY ONE DAY AT A TIME. THE ENERGY IS ALWAYS SHIFTING AND INTEGRATING AND CHANGING. "TO KNOW THAT IS TO FLOW THAT." CAN I COIN THAT PHRASE FOR A MILLION OR 2? LOL... PERHAPS UNDERSTANDING that a woman or a man doesn't need to fit in the statistical boxes could very well be how we are all evolving to higher levels of compatibility in all relationships. DANICA, PERHAPS YOU REALLY WANT A SENSITIVE MAN, TO BALANCE YOUR MASCULINE SIDE WITHOUT TRYING TO CHANGE YOU OR HIM AT ALL. You may have to remove some programming if that is really what you desire and can appreciate. GREAT PODCAST... THANK YOU BOTH!
Why do you think she's masculine?
@@wyleecoyotee4252 Didn't say that. I said, she wants a sensitive man to balance her masculine side. I could say "she may want" also. But I believe I have illustrated my point there. I think her masculine race car side is awesome and the fact that she is also very sensitive and feminine is equally awesome. DUALITY
AG1..... Awesome that Danica is promoting this....
The fact that Danica was so taken aback and surprised by the reasons why men sleep with people other than their partners shows how much progress as society we still have to make. I don't know the best way of educating women that their is ZERO correlation for men between looking outside a relationship and the strength of the relationship itself, it is PURELY a physical transaction. It's no reflection on the woman at all.
Yes, that is why a lot of men are secretly gay. It is a physical transaction, and they have discovered it is a better experience with other men, than with women.
He is absolutely correct that Danika is in my opinion in the top 3% of all single eligible women. Success, beauty, intelligence, fit, emotional stability. All hard to find in that combination these days.
Valuable information and insights presented here. Danica, your questions demonstrated your intellect, critical thinking and reasoning skills and your open mind and heart. As far as the subject matter, on another 'level" I believe we are witnessed in real time the dissolution of the the patriarchy and a more balanced masculine/feminine future for HumanKind. With that dissolution comes considerable chaos but we are on target for a better world for men, women and children. This will take some time. ;-) The "shift" is in play, the game is afoot, let us have at it!
There's no clear heels in biology. Skeet skeet! ~ Chris Rock. 🤣
ThankU!..A Interesting Podcast 2 Say The Least!
theres only one way a relationship can work.. thats with 100 percent honesty... it garunteed to be a rollercoaster but its the only way a relationship can have source energy in it
For a woman, not all, the sexual experience builds around her emotions, the need to be desired, the recognition of feminine beauty and appreciation of her, even a man who can tap into her emotional intelligence. Having the intellectual skill sets to access these women could make a difference because women control the sex and all things being equal can create a cornucopia of variety. Plus, with the advent of sexual props, tools, equipment women tend to default to their sock drawer rather than a man as there is dissatisfaction of available suitors. Selectivity matters as the sexual marketplace continues to evolve.
Love a Man who is a Man~treats us like a lady and emotionally, physically available with honesty✌️💞
I completely understand where Dr. Buss is coming from, but what about the educated guys that can’t find a mate. Why is it all about the guys faults and no talk about the women? A lot of great women out there, but it’s hard to find a chick that is curious about life and loves to read. So much superficial narcissism out there. A lot of these women it’s hard to even hold an intellectual conversation with. We are multidimensional beings as well…. We want depth just as much as anything else. Just seems like I’m the Instagram age it’s getting harder and harder to find women that can hold a conversation past gossip and surface level conversations… there are men out there that are really trying! The majority is stuck on their phones. We can all do better…
And why is this all about monetary value? What about happiness in their job and career? I know plenty of millionaires that are miserable in both ways of gender… just seems like a stereotype. At the end of the day love is love and connection is connection. I love academia but it seems so bias and the examples are in the extremes. What about the wealth and privileged that don’t do what high grant did. Sexual variation could also mean being not happy within. Seems like his hypothesis is half baked…
Would love to talk with Dr. Buss and learn more. So many questions. I’m not right, I just would like a more nuanced view.
As Patrice says men are equivalent to fast food for women. A dime a dozen and on every corner. They are in control and men act and react accordingly. At the end of the day everyone wants to be loved, but our realities are extremely different from one another.
Wish I could be Dr. Buss’s student and learn more from him and his research.
It seems to me that, Danica, and I could be incorrect, holds the idea in her mind that because she has “ options” ( we all do regardless of mating status) that it’s somehow ok to ditch the current relationship that’s not at the time fulfilling. David belabored the point of emotional stability in a relationship is what keeps the relationship stronger ( healthy) for longer ( happy). Obviously, Danica is jaded, perhaps rightfully so, however i thinks it’s a bad mix when someone uses “ options” as a guideline to excuse themselves from a relationship and their jaded and their emotional stability has been depleting. I think losing the mindset of “ I have options” and replenishing emotions stability added with having a list of reg flags and triggers from past relationships can make the difference for Danica.
Great topic as always! With regard to marriage, I would have been interested in what the trend is worldwide and not just in the U.S. I feel like since the institute of marriage was created by religion, you may see trends are different depending on the culture.
David Buss walking on eggshells a bit
He's a dinosaur
I have lived all over the world and often heard this ruling of thumb regarding the perfect age for a woman for a man. It was divide the man’s age in half and add 6 or 7. Depending on the country. For example a 40 old man should date and marry a 26 or 27 year old woman. I do not know what it is based on. Maturity development in the genders. Possibly financial security of a older man. Just thought it was interesting how this rule of thumb was heard in so many different countries.
Another great mind, great collaboration love you breadth of personalities👌
From Teal Swan to Rich Cooper great content👍
Hey D, this is a great interview. I am a guy and don't really get interested in this kind of discussion usually. But I love your show, so i gave it a chance. Of course to keep the discussion brief, your guest had to use a lot of generalizations. And due to him being around 60 years old, I would guess that his conclusions are based on many years of observation. Cool, but also what I see as a disadvantage for some of the speculations which he presents. Because, in My Speculation, I would say that many of the current issues involving female and male coupling and compatibility are not so much based on the old genetic stereotypical patterns. But rather I would say that the largest major negative issue is the External Manipulation by an out of control western culture. Hyper-Consumerism, Population Control psychological biasing, Intoxicating Capitalism, and the fact that all free feel good things have either been destroyed or bought by the Corporations and sold in a sterile marketed form which leaves no lasting fulfillment. Also Tik-Tok, video games, etc have helped to lower attention spans to the point where real relationships seem like "just to damn much work" for the average consumer. And that is really the crux of it here in La La Land, we have been raised as Consumers and real physical relationships hold about as much emotional value as the relationships that we have (sold to us by big Corps) with products such as TV stars, Musicians, TH-cam hosts, Video Game Avatars, etc... I don't have the solution except to say that when you find another human that makes you feel special, never let go! ;)
Best to feel good in your own right..then see who shows up to share the journey. Xxx
Wonderful episode, loved it 👍🏻x
Danica I’m 40 I just want to say I’m in the same boat as you in the sense that I don’t know if I am meant to be a mother but there are universal mothers and you are definitely universally healing so many souls. I just want you to know I think that you would be an extraordinary mother for a child but if you end up having animals a whole world is gonna be blessed by your presence sorry for blowing up your thread love you
Oh my gosh Danica I’m so honored to learn about who you are through your videos. I found you about a month ago and I am addicted to watching you because you are truly a very wonderful woman. My mother was wonderful but she really neglected me so I often manifest men that are great but they kind of don’t show up in the way that I know I am capable of receiving attention it is so intense to transcend all of that and I love hearing you be so real and expressive about where you have come from I resonate. Thank you
DANICA MOTHER ATE PODE FALIR PORQUE TUDO AGORA DANICA E SEXO NO MATINHO NA ESQUINA NA BEIRA DA ESTRADA DENTRO DO CARRO DENTRO DO ONIBUS TREM AVIÃO PRA QUE MOTHER SE ATE EM CINEMA SE FAZ SEXO EM TODOS OS LUGARES E ATE EM BAILES . DE DANÇA #
Yeah...you guys are pretty spot-on at so many points.... 👏👏👏👏
Umm, I'd say I'm on a 45 degree downward success equality, but Danica is attractive
How many men are stuck in marriages? "Cheaper to keep her". or how about no sex in marriages? Who's really trapped?
Both are trapped, but the fact is that beyond a certain age there is not much opportunity. Yes, you can leave, but then you will simply be alone with next to no prospect of finding another partner again. And let's say you find another partner, chances are that they left a similar relationship behind that you had with your first wife or husband. So now you have two jaded people with tons of baggage in a "romance". What do you expect to happen? Romeo and Juliet? High school sweethearts 2.0? No, of course not. You will have two bitter people fighting for every bit of real estate in the new relationship because they are both afraid of ending in the same trap, again. That is what happens on average. It's not a new beginning. It's merely a repeat psychodrama of the first failures. On average it is much, much better to find a workable arrangement in the original marriage, assuming that it was built on love in the first place. If it wasn't, then all hope is lost. Everybody is in a loveless place and will remain there.
I never quite got who all these men are mating with ,if the women are so mature?
The fact that Danica “thinks like a guy” in a woman’s body is a big part of what is making it difficult for her to understand both the female and the male side of the equation. Simultaneously, this psychological stance also can help her to build a communication bridge between the sexes as long as she understands that she is an outlier, while seeking to build empathy with a wider spectrum of female and male experiences.
I think people should really be educated by going to pre-marital counseling or reading many books before commitment and kids. Maybe women's and men's desires won't change, but awareness half solves the challenges. Understanding is so important.
I gotta say that I really appreciate this gentleman forgive me for not inserting his name. It is imperative that you do a trip with the person to not a glorious Motel you know hotel glorious place but something real and Humane to see how they respond to people on a base level.
Danica still looks good with makeup !
Even more with no makeup! She's a dime.
Hey Danica, I am a new viewer. I found you while searching for Dr Steven Greer videos. So I fell in love with you right away, your beauty, humour, intelligence, curiosity, etc. Keep up the pursuit of love, and thanks for taking us along for the ride. If you want something different to read in your down time, I have a little book I self-published in 2019. Truth Phoenix by Eric Bubela. Take care and lots of love, E:)
Such an informative podcast, super relevant to what’s currently going on in dating and relationships today. Thanks Danica for shining a light on this topic!
The lessons in life that one needs to understand, lol. I love variety but if I can get it all in one package, I will pass over the variety and stick to "the one" as they call it. Until then... Enjoy your life. Thanks Danica. I like you do a lot of research btw, it shows me your hungry for life still. Cheers
I absolutely love your videos 🙌🌞
Most men would love a person who makes a lot of money, the woman usually don’t want a less successful men .
How would polyamorous relationship work when raising children?
I’m so over men and all the baggage. Fight the patriarchy! I am much happier with a same sex female partner.
Grow up honestly both sexes have baggage.
Not for long😆
how pathetic
I'd just rather be single and have a special friend
Lesbians have the highest domestic violence rates. Good luck.
I would disagree on the statement that women are not that visual as men... they are so much pickier than men when it comes to looks
WOW!..I Totally Agree With David!!!!
a partnership of love is unquestionable loyalty to do things for and have things done the same a gift when gone can never be replaced I miss my Angel who now is an Angel such a shame so many cant get it right the first time However we are here for experience Live & let Live together
Around 1:15:00 a light came on! The reason many men don’t do well with “strong independent women” is TWO fold. SIW “don’t need a man” and we need to be needed. We have to feel useful and necessary. THEN, consider having children, owning a home together, etc. creates an environment where separation is rarely a good idea so you’re more likely to work through issues. SIW, as the lovely Ms Patrick implied, are only anchored by the measure of their own happiness.
No offense to women, but I’ve yet to meet an unmarried or childless woman over 35 who’s actually happy.
All things considered, it’s just not worth the effort, energy, or resources.
I like where your head is at, Danica! Communication has not been my strong suit. It takes years sometimes and therapy as well. ; ) "I just love driving fast!"
At 1:20 regarding the legal aspect of marriage and before that during the polyamorous relationship analysis, the process of raising kids was not even mentioned as if that's not the Main reason to marry.
DP , determined to get to the bottom of this ! David is perfect in the pit - before you get out on the track - that is
I could cheat but I know the endless problems. Emotional damage, fighting, diseases. Stress. Guilt. ETC. Etc. ETC.
Danica, I have watched many of videos. Do you believe there is one person for you?
I think that the ceremony of just confessing your love to somebody without getting the government involved is awesome
Yes. I was 32 and had two marriages before I met the ONE for me. I had a daughter to raise whose father had died suddenly the year before. I had a new clinical psych PhD and needed to support both financially and emotionally my daughter. The man I met did not want children and had a vasectomy after his divorce right before I met him. He was 37. His plan was to play the field, he was dating 3 women when I met him...one for dinner dates, another for beach and sailing outings and a third for sex...an experienced older woman who wouldnt wrap him up i to commitment. But he said when he met me he knew he would never find anyone like me again. I on the other hand, had to be very very careful having my daughter's welfare and future at stake. I said let's date and you SHOULD date other women and I should date other men.
In truth he was everything I wanted so I didnt date anyone else but I wanted HIM to be sure eg that he could be a parental figure for my child but he didnt need to support her financially I would do that. My daughter had been head over heels for her father and she didnt want anyone to take his place...no one COULD for her. We dated a year before he admitted he had dropped tge 3 other women after he met me. We wanted to be together seriously. I told him I couldnt marry him as I had to be solely financially independent. We shared joint expenses.
He was tremendous. It worked out for us. I know it was harder for him than it was for me because he had counted on having no children. He taught my daughter to sail, to fly and encouraged her dreams to be a military pilot...he could not have been better to her had he been her own father...in fact he dedicated more time to her than her own father had.
Our dream was to retire early and sail by the time we were 50.and 55. We accomplished that goal and she was in the military as a pilot by then.
We never married... we both LIKED the idea that we chose to be together everyday....each of us was free to walk at any time no financial or legal strings attached. It was freeing for me and for him.
Yet since we wanted to do all the same things in life, we accomplished all our goals together. He built us a beautiful home in the tropics after sailing. We had 25 years of retirement and he passed away a month after his 80th birthday last year.I could not have had a better life.
Friends were shocked we were not married..we had been together 41 years and we never SAID we were married, people just assumed.
There are lots of ways to build a happy life...marriage is but one way.