Sufjan Stevens, "Fourth Of July" (Official Audio)

แชร์
ฝัง
  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 29 มี.ค. 2015
  • From the album CARRIE & LOWELL
    Buy it: akrec.co/akr099-buy / Album stream: akrec.co/1xuiuN0
    Available on Asthmatic Kitty Records
    More info: carrieandlowell.com
    LYRICS:
    The evil it spread like a fever ahead
    It was night when you died, my firefly
    What could I have said to raise you from the dead?
    Oh could I be the sky on the fourth of July?
    “Well you do enough talk
    My little hawk, why do you cry?
    Tell me what did you learn from the Tillamook burn?
    Or the Fourth of July?
    We’re all gonna die.”
    Sitting at the bed with the halo at your head
    Was it all a disguise, like Junior High
    Where everything was fiction, future, and prediction
    Now where am I? My fading supply
    “Did you get enough love, my little dove
    Why do you cry?
    And I’m sorry I left, but it was for the best
    Though it never felt right
    My little Versailles.”
    The hospital asked should the body be cast
    Before I say goodbye, my star in the sky
    Such a funny thought to wrap you up in cloth
    Do you find it all right, my dragonfly?
    “Shall we look at the moon, my little loon
    Why do you cry?
    Make the most of your life, while it is rife
    While it is light
    Well you do enough talk
    My little hawk, why do you cry?
    Tell me what did you learn from the Tillamook burn?
    Or the Fourth of July?
    We’re all gonna die.”
  • เพลง

ความคิดเห็น • 10K

  • @annastesia4547
    @annastesia4547 8 ปีที่แล้ว +39719

    We’re all gonna cry.

    • @Bfakz
      @Bfakz 5 ปีที่แล้ว +423

      Beautiful number of likes

    • @scamingnewt3016
      @scamingnewt3016 5 ปีที่แล้ว +241

      @@Bfakz lemme guess, it was at 666

    • @Bfakz
      @Bfakz 5 ปีที่แล้ว +148

      @@scamingnewt3016 yep

    • @pau1057
      @pau1057 5 ปีที่แล้ว +83

      Yes we are

    • @stayrospaparunas3062
      @stayrospaparunas3062 5 ปีที่แล้ว +58

      I count it again n it is 667...$orr¥

  • @ewanoxborrow1024
    @ewanoxborrow1024 3 ปีที่แล้ว +28293

    “I’m sorry I left, but it was for the best, though it never felt right”
    I’m sobbing

    • @thedogsquad2451
      @thedogsquad2451 2 ปีที่แล้ว +76

      me too

    • @Joarch24
      @Joarch24 2 ปีที่แล้ว +171

      I’m sad because it will always feel right to me

    • @sofiehansen1382
      @sofiehansen1382 2 ปีที่แล้ว +95

      My little versailles

    • @sofidollface
      @sofidollface 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      nao nao

    • @sofidollface
      @sofidollface 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@thedogsquad2451 opp

  • @vividsts5057
    @vividsts5057 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +2847

    The author of this song wrote this song in grief of his mother, who died of cancer. The lines were directly taken from the conversation he had with her before passing.

    • @bluedred7814
      @bluedred7814 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +108

      i hate that after reading this i can 100% hear it in the lyrics 😢

    • @mansfieldfamily1623
      @mansfieldfamily1623 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +21

      That's so sad! 😢🫂

    • @firstlast476
      @firstlast476 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      😢

    • @maraho2528
      @maraho2528 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +11

      رنج ازدست دادن عزیزان مشهوده شعر وآهنگ متاثر کننده😢😢😢

    • @chloestewart3669
      @chloestewart3669 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +19

      one of the reasons i love this song. Very relatable with my own mum.

  • @Mikelz579
    @Mikelz579 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +1895

    Just remember that your not the only one crying in the other side of the screen. ALL pain will end.

    • @lyricsa101
      @lyricsa101 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +21

      🥺

    • @justahuman466
      @justahuman466 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

      STOPP IM LITERALLY SOBBING

    • @melusineshade8538
      @melusineshade8538 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      Thank you

    • @zachgod242
      @zachgod242 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Saying things like that means so much to the people that need to hear it

    • @Worship.Jesus.
      @Worship.Jesus. 24 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      I don't know wich pain you y'all are going through right now but I hope the Jesus will renew you're strength

  • @tomm782
    @tomm782 8 ปีที่แล้ว +13137

    imagining a mother on her deathbed asking her son "did you get enough love, my little dove?" perfectly encapsulates human compassion

    • @ZakTheIllest
      @ZakTheIllest 8 ปีที่แล้ว +408

      i read this exactly as the lyrics played. blessed.

    • @NIKHILKURIANJACOB
      @NIKHILKURIANJACOB 6 ปีที่แล้ว +59

      Couldn't agree more.

    • @junkheadrooster
      @junkheadrooster 5 ปีที่แล้ว +195

      How did you just paint the most poignant image in TH-cam in a single comment

    • @vrnki
      @vrnki 5 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      That's EXACTLY what I thought!!!

    • @egorkononenko8284
      @egorkononenko8284 5 ปีที่แล้ว +96

      This part of lyrics was supposed to represent her words after death

  • @rachelhawkins7213
    @rachelhawkins7213 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7171

    My Son (My Little HAWK) committed suicide last year in May. I loved this song before, but now I have a deeper appreciation. R.I.P. Jake. I love you forever.

    • @_the_
      @_the_ 3 ปีที่แล้ว +375

      I'm sorry for your loss. I hope you stay save and strong during these crazy times

    • @rachelhawkins7213
      @rachelhawkins7213 3 ปีที่แล้ว +204

      @@_the_
      Thank you. Truly. I know he's in the best place possible, shining down on me every single day.
      💜💙

    • @tejakausik6205
      @tejakausik6205 3 ปีที่แล้ว +99

      i'm so so sorry. i could never even begin to fathom what you have been through, but you must be incredibly strong.

    • @rachelhawkins7213
      @rachelhawkins7213 3 ปีที่แล้ว +65

      @@tejakausik6205
      I come from a lineage of (true and historical) Female Warriors.. but GOD gets all the credit. I'd be dead and gone without HIM. 💜

    • @MaryYu0828
      @MaryYu0828 2 ปีที่แล้ว +38

      I can't bear to have my children die before me im truly sorry for your loss

  • @thewildanimal18
    @thewildanimal18 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1813

    Last year I lost my little sister in December to suicide, this was the song I listened to every night.
    Sometimes I listen to this song and think of her.

    • @lorenzoilmagnifico2431
      @lorenzoilmagnifico2431 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +81

      Hey man, this takes some balls to write❤ i Hope you feel a Little bit Better now.
      As an older Brother i can not even Imagine the horrors of a dead Brother/sister❤

    • @youtubecommentergal4346
      @youtubecommentergal4346 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +47

      I'm sorry and I know that doesn't take away the pain but I hope you know you're not alone. I lost a very good friend of mine. We were like twins. I loved him and his death has hit me hard. We weren't blood siblings and we weren't even friends in real life just online but still.
      I can only imagine the shock and sadness I'd feel if my little sister committed suicide. Just know it's not your fault. Please don't blame yourself or feel like you should've been able to know somehow what she was going through. Just try and heal and live for her. Live so that you can make something good of your life and make her proud.
      That's what's been keeping me going. I hope this helps in some way.💙

    • @tsar01iron62
      @tsar01iron62 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +26

      Nobody should loss someone by suicide, i am so sorry for you ❤

    • @KylieRose629
      @KylieRose629 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +18

      I'm so sorry for your loss love stay strong❤

    • @Bella_on_paws919
      @Bella_on_paws919 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      BALLS?​@@lorenzoilmagnifico2431

  • @mariamsafadi
    @mariamsafadi 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +319

    My cat died tonight. Didn't imagine it would hurt this much. He added joy to a joyless life I depressingly bear. Thanks for all the love, the warmth, and all the good times. will forever miss you baby.

    • @Amberxxbbunni
      @Amberxxbbunni 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

      So sorry for your loss💗🕊️

    • @mariamsafadi
      @mariamsafadi 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      Thank you dear xx
      @@Amberxxbbunni

    • @B4no_shyyrosss
      @B4no_shyyrosss 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      Mine was poisoned by my own relatives

    • @Sonic_is_number_1
      @Sonic_is_number_1 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      I'm so so sorry.

    • @mariamsafadi
      @mariamsafadi หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@B4no_shyyrosss oh my God. So sorry for your loss.

  • @seafoam5245
    @seafoam5245 8 ปีที่แล้ว +8628

    I couldn't cry because in a separate tab I was reading about instant ramen

  • @VisionDuSeuil
    @VisionDuSeuil 9 ปีที่แล้ว +5661

    "Did you get enough love, my little dove. Why do you cry?"
    This hurts, indeed.

    • @kirkcavenaugh758
      @kirkcavenaugh758 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Becky del Monte wehh

    • @katherinajulietdejuarez9729
      @katherinajulietdejuarez9729 5 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      read this as he said it

    • @nef2625
      @nef2625 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Kathryn Picklesimer same

    • @mafiagirl1648
      @mafiagirl1648 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I'm the little dove TT

    • @TheKimmerella
      @TheKimmerella 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      MAFIA GIRL When I saw your initials “TT” I thought at first it was my daughter commenting that “she is the little dove!” Her initials are TT! This song is so moving-and my favorite verse in this verse “Did you get enough love, my little dove...”🌸💞🌸

  • @pinkepistazie5817
    @pinkepistazie5817 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +593

    Yesterday. The 14th of November 2023. That's when he left. That's when cancer took him away from me. He was my best friend. He had the brightest smile and the most contagious laugh. His heart was full of love to give. He was a really smart guy. He knew so much about history. He was always able to comfort me. He was always by my side. We dreamed of the future together. But what now? He was only 18. He deserved so much better. I miss him so much. He will always be in my heart.

    • @soggyytoes
      @soggyytoes 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +14

      I’m so sorry for ur loss,ur so strong.

    • @amelkacaramelka
      @amelkacaramelka 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +20

      (I'm Russian, so I can make mistakes, sorry)
      Dear friend..we all can understand you..but don't cry..I think, he looks for you from the clouds.. He didn't want to hear your tears..
      This autumn I had the same story..
      He was my internet-brother. But he had Deadly disease - also cancer.. 15of September, in my b-day, he Ended his life by himself..
      But honey..life isn't ended.. that pain inside and you should Convert it in good memories.. I believe in you ❤

    • @yourfavoritelocalnerd
      @yourfavoritelocalnerd 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      He’s still here, always. He’s your guardian angel, and you’ll be the one to keep him alive forever.

    • @Amberxxbbunni
      @Amberxxbbunni 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      So sorry for your loss💗🕊️
      He maybe be gone, but the thing hurting him is also now gone💗

    • @meral2428
      @meral2428 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      14th of November 2023 was the best day of my life. I finally left my country and everything I had behind to start a totally new life. I’m sorry for your loss. Still it’s very interesting to me how we both woke up that day, feeling things that couldn’t be further apart from another. I hope that your happiest day is still ahead of you and I bet your friend is cheering you on, from wherever he is now.

  • @ievrz
    @ievrz 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1754

    For the person reading this, healing takes time. I love you. You're so worth it. You're amazing. You're the best person in the world.

    • @31G-xr8ed
      @31G-xr8ed 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +29

      thx, I heard this song while crying hard. Hope we get better life.

    • @meg7108
      @meg7108 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      Thank you

    • @meg7108
      @meg7108 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      We will : )@@31G-xr8ed

    • @MayElsayegh
      @MayElsayegh 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      Thanks

    • @unknownanalyst1787
      @unknownanalyst1787 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +11

      I appreciate you so much! Was crying to this at 1am 🫶🏼

  • @hi_k_w9984
    @hi_k_w9984 ปีที่แล้ว +8028

    Today, the 4th of July, I was supposed to end my life. That was my mission. Yesterday my friends prepare a surprise for me: a cake for me. All this party was my best friend's idea.
    Now I'm sitting in the living room, dreaming about the travel we're going to start in two weeks.
    Just want to listen to this song and remember how it feels so sad when I was at my lowest.
    But now, I can see some light in my future. And this, this feels so relaxing.

    • @saam559
      @saam559 ปีที่แล้ว +531

      i don’t know you, but i am extremely proud of you! you got this, you deserve to be happy

    • @kittyfang7241
      @kittyfang7241 ปีที่แล้ว +171

      Hang in there, you got this!♥

    • @misia353
      @misia353 ปีที่แล้ว +92

      im proud

    • @arianesouza537
      @arianesouza537 ปีที่แล้ว +94

      @@saam559 Your life worth more than you reliaze. And I'm so proud of you just for being who you are, and for stand still a little bit more! You got this ❤

    • @oomba7822
      @oomba7822 ปีที่แล้ว +46

      I am so proud of you.. so, so proud

  • @summer-rd2qw
    @summer-rd2qw 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3344

    I’m 14. My mom is in her fifties. I’m scared of the time that will come when she will die. I’m not prepared and I don’t think I’ll ever been prepared. I know I should be enjoying the moments with her rather than being scared of when she won’t be here so I will try. I love her so much and this song reminds me so much of her. Great work Sufjan!

    • @sophiusdynami3401
      @sophiusdynami3401 3 ปีที่แล้ว +105

      You are a loving child. ❤️

    • @ashanddoodles13
      @ashanddoodles13 2 ปีที่แล้ว +209

      This hits home. I'm 19 and my parents are closer to 60. We don't have the best relationship but songs like these make me scared of losing them even if we don't really get along. It's sad I waste so much time being scared of losing people rather than telling them how much they mean to me

    • @justexisting184
      @justexisting184 2 ปีที่แล้ว +34

      @@ashanddoodles13 if you can somehow tell them. My parents are near that age too and the majority of our time together is over perhaps. so with what i have left we'll fight and hurt each other but i hope through all the turmoil they remember they were and are loved by me and the same for me

    • @iighosted1195
      @iighosted1195 2 ปีที่แล้ว +57

      This hits very close to home I’m 14 and my adopted parents are 67 and 68 now and it’s recently dawned on me that I might not have that long left with them. I’ve already lost my biological parents and I don’t know if I could cope with loosing the people that there for me when I needed them the most

    • @nicolette350
      @nicolette350 2 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      This hits hard, I'm 15 and my mom is 66 and my dad is 63

  • @RebikaG-nj1ne
    @RebikaG-nj1ne 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +119

    Why do u cry ?
    It hits u so hard feels like someone actually is speaking to u

  • @inger3756
    @inger3756 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +109

    My grandma passed away today. I prayed day and night hoping that she will be able to stay long enough to see me success in life and to meet me one last time. (I study abroad) I wanna hug her, be there for her one last time. See her smile one last time. I feel so lost right now

    • @wilsona1009
      @wilsona1009 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +10

      Hey!
      I'm sorry you had to go through that.
      It's okay to feel overwhelmed and cry to express your sorrow.
      But, you must move on, okay?
      She wouldn't be there to see you succeed but she would definitely want you to succeed. Hope you achieve it!!!.

    • @musicitsmylife6672
      @musicitsmylife6672 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      😓💔🥺

  • @princeonsare2419
    @princeonsare2419 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7653

    I'm not ashamed to admit that I literally cried reading the comments as the song played on. I'm so sorry for everyone who had to experience grief. I hope one day you will be happy again💌

    • @ashanddoodles13
      @ashanddoodles13 2 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      Honestly same. It's 3:30am where I am and I just discovered this song, was not ready for the emotions it would throw at me while I read the comments.

    • @kristinejacek8635
      @kristinejacek8635 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Thank you God bless you.

    • @bettinafarfeleder6297
      @bettinafarfeleder6297 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      same.

    • @whatalovelynight.7239
      @whatalovelynight.7239 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I'd like to think that will be true, thx darling.

    • @crybaby6981
      @crybaby6981 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      im sobbing ilysm

  • @Henry-xt6ls
    @Henry-xt6ls 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2777

    This seriously might be the saddest song I've ever heard

    • @harungezici618
      @harungezici618 6 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Henry Lansing same here

    • @staystrongjoseph
      @staystrongjoseph 5 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Listen to ARE YOU THERE by anathema
      Also to their mother
      Even sadder than this

    • @sera_sarzad
      @sera_sarzad 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      The Trapeze Swinger wants to say hi

    • @Yootan_ew
      @Yootan_ew 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      It is

    • @starlahawkins5549
      @starlahawkins5549 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Same

  • @epicenyaa9171
    @epicenyaa9171 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +195

    Two years ago i was on the lowest point in my life. Listening to this song just crying was some form of therapy for me. The person reading this, i know you don’t believe it but it does get better. No matter how bad it is and how much you’re suffering, it always gets better. I still start to cry listening to this even though i‘ve healed. Memories can hurt but that’s totally okay.

    • @user-ze6iy4ky4t
      @user-ze6iy4ky4t 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      I feel most terrible,my family forces me to get married to guy ,that I don’t have feelings for him ,my heart is so breaking,I don’t know what to do.They tell me it’s time 24 years.I dont have idea but I’m dying inside

    • @wojtek405
      @wojtek405 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Everyone's situations are different, it's okay to give hope, but it doesn't always improve.

  • @hildre.4552
    @hildre.4552 14 วันที่ผ่านมา +7

    My mom passed away from cancer in my arms three years ago. "Im not afraid of death, Im afraid of.. not being here". I miss you mom..

  • @gauravprakash
    @gauravprakash 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6927

    Marking my presence here on 4th July, 2020. This has been a horrible year. A lot of people have lost their loved ones. I hope they all rest in peace.

    • @frosteerucker4259
      @frosteerucker4259 3 ปีที่แล้ว +93

      A lot of people also lost the business they built for generations.

    • @rachelhawkins7213
      @rachelhawkins7213 3 ปีที่แล้ว +50

      Amen. Rest In Peace, to the loved ones we've lost.

    • @tingtingdai2078
      @tingtingdai2078 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      🙏

    • @onewordhereonewordthere6975
      @onewordhereonewordthere6975 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@frosteerucker4259 carpe diem ! Choose how ! Good luck !

    • @summero-my5in
      @summero-my5in 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      i will make my mark as well, and your comment is lovely

  • @BEEscuit1111
    @BEEscuit1111 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5336

    This makes me think about how much little me went through. She didn't deserve any of what happened. She was so confused, sad and alone. She helped everyone, but no one helped her when she needed the most.
    I imagine present me singing this to old me. I wish i could've taken better care of my inner child. She deserved so much more.

    • @salmonandsoup
      @salmonandsoup 2 ปีที่แล้ว +174

      She's still there, deep down. If you want to scoop her up, you can. It's in your mind, but you can tell her that. I'm sure she wants to hear it.

    • @Akalim
      @Akalim 2 ปีที่แล้ว +95

      It's not too late, the fact that you acknowledge her presence, means she's still there

    • @flavianesilva1979
      @flavianesilva1979 2 ปีที่แล้ว +66

      Same, kid me was so selfless that she gave all she had until there was nothing left. I wish i could shild her from all this pain, confusion. I wish i could go back.

    • @someone-fo4sp
      @someone-fo4sp 2 ปีที่แล้ว +53

      Little me deserves an apology, It doesn't even feel like i'm talking about myself, it feels like it was another kid, another suffering kid.

    • @anita_daphne_
      @anita_daphne_ 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      thank u for this comment

  • @a_is_for_rat3645
    @a_is_for_rat3645 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +159

    my papa passed away at around 2:00 this morning. he and my nana were like second parents to me because they'd always take care of me whenever my parents were at work or busy. this is the first time i've had to deal with something like this and i'm so scared. i miss him so so much already. now i'll always think of him when i hear this song. i love you so much, Papa

    • @CUKUREVENIZ
      @CUKUREVENIZ 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      🥺♡

    • @Amberxxbbunni
      @Amberxxbbunni 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      So sorry for your loss🕊️💗

  • @Mikael_4942
    @Mikael_4942 16 วันที่ผ่านมา +12

    Just lost my grandpa today and I came here to listen to this masterpiece while crying

    • @anupamasunilmarkose8381
      @anupamasunilmarkose8381 14 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      Pls don't cry.. ur grandpa is still with u buddy

    • @Mikael_4942
      @Mikael_4942 14 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Thank you, I feel much better now. I just returned from his funeral. He had dementia for many years, he can finally rest in peace now🕊️

    • @lynxpaws123
      @lynxpaws123 5 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      My nan left me in November and it still hurts and its left a hole in my heart but they will never really be gone as long as someone remembers them

  • @shyhistorian
    @shyhistorian 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4226

    When I was a teenager, I’d cry with tears. Now as an adult, there’s no tears. My body just aches, I can’t feel my legs and I shake.
    *We’re all gonna die*

  • @nexboo5902
    @nexboo5902 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1804

    "did you get enough love, my little dove?" this line always makes me think of my mother and her last words to me before she passed away when i was 5, its currently almost been a decade since she passed and i still continuously wish she was here still just so she could see me and how far ive come in my lifetime and see me graduate high school

    • @kimberlyjardines5778
      @kimberlyjardines5778 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      I feel ur pain it makes me sad that my mom will never be beside me on very important stuff in my life like graduation for high school. 😪

    • @aishwaryashrestha8357
      @aishwaryashrestha8357 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      We’re all proud of you guys ❤️

    • @lily-tc5zg
      @lily-tc5zg 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      i hope you do well and i wish you the best in life and good luck with whatever comes your way, your mom is very proud of you

    • @enursvc
      @enursvc 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I am proud of you. Your mom is proud too, you know. ❤️ She is with you every day. She can see you, she can feel you. 🥰

    • @victoriah1984
      @victoriah1984 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      She sees you. And she's proud of you. ❤️

  • @Lina-kt9hb
    @Lina-kt9hb 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +80

    Today is exactly three years since I lost my best friend to suicide. I really hope he is better where he is now. I will always love you and will never forget you.

    • @midnight2458
      @midnight2458 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Im sorry for your loss

    • @editstar1612
      @editstar1612 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Im so soryy he is in the best place in heavan and his happy and loves you very much❤

  • @sloth5894
    @sloth5894 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +65

    i found out yesterday that i lost a close friend to suicide. i came here because i find slight comfort in this song. i don’t know how to feel, i’ve never lost someone before. i want to talk about it but at the same time i don’t want to think about it. she would always come up and hug me and i even saw her two days ago. i waved at her. she seemed happy. you never know what someone is going through, though. i still can’t process that i won’t see her again, when i’m walking through the hallways in school or walking down my street. i feel horrible for her family, and our other friends. i hope everyone reading this understands that you aren’t alone

  • @omarneira3377
    @omarneira3377 8 ปีที่แล้ว +4901

    This song is a conversation between Sufjan and his mother, Carrie, while she was dying in the hospital. Each stanza alternates between them.
    Sufjan spoke of this time in an interview:
    She had stomach cancer, and it was a quick demise. We flew to see her in the ICU before she died. She was in a lot of pain, and on a lot of drugs, but she was aware. It was so terrifying to encounter death and have to reconcile that, and express love, for someone so unfamiliar. Her death was so devastating to me because of the vacancy within me…
    At that point, I was only interested in communicating my love for her, unconditionally. There was a reciprocal deep love and care for each other in that moment. It was very profound and healing.
    A beautifully sad album overall. This song makes me cry though.

    • @Fffiji
      @Fffiji 8 ปีที่แล้ว +79

      I went through the same thing with my mother (right down to the stomach cancer). I feel like he's in my head, so beautiful.

    • @jasonalt7110
      @jasonalt7110 8 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Amazing lyrics with so much reality & passion I can relate.

    • @lizbajjalieh9841
      @lizbajjalieh9841 8 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Hey, I've been trying to find the source for this, can you link it?

    • @oooomingmak
      @oooomingmak 7 ปีที่แล้ว +45

      +Liz Bajjalieh I know your comment is a month old, but in case you're still wondering, the quote is from Sufjan's interview with Pitchfork titled "True Myth: A Conversation With Sufjan Stevens"

    • @nina92love
      @nina92love 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Omar Neira this tear my heart in half 💔

  • @Sameoldfitup
    @Sameoldfitup 3 ปีที่แล้ว +853

    “Has it ever struck you that life is all memory, except for the one present moment that goes by you so quick you hardly catch it going?”― Tennessee Williams

    • @zohrazeba3811
      @zohrazeba3811 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Profound

    • @aruns6040
      @aruns6040 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      This is the best comment I've read in a while

  • @mossil_fossil
    @mossil_fossil 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +128

    I remember listening to this song a lot last year. My best friend suffered with many mental disorders, an illness too and she was always in hospitals. She was suicidal as well. A lot of times I cried at night thinking that if I fell asleep I'd wake up with her texting me a goodbye and leaving me forever. She was the only person who ever understood me and made me feel better, she didn't make me uncomfortable and was always nice and funny. At some point she committed. She wad admitted to a hospital, she survived, but I've been even more scared since that day. Everytime I had to go to school and leave my phone at home or not look at it for the next 7 hours, scared me to death because any of these hours could be the time she tries committing again and this time she might succeed.
    There were times where she'd leave for a week, most of the time because of her illness affecting her life or a depressive episode. I counted those days and always thought "if she is gone for more than 7 then she died" and every time I was any close to the 7th day I would just breakdown and cry thinking everything was over and that I actually lost my best friend. Luckily she always came back, she never left me and I'm glad.
    Recently she said her life got better, still in the hospital a lot of the time, but she said she was doing better. I am happy for her, but I can't stop crying and overthinking almost every night. Idk if she will die, idk if she will live. Even if things are better now I wont ever stop feeling this fear as if she will stop responding for days again. I dont want to have to count them again and feel more and more depressed everytime I wake up :(

    • @passwordprotectedd
      @passwordprotectedd 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +15

      Please tell her this and how you feel. If you don't and she passes, you will regret not sharing your feelings. I don't want you to have to live with that regret.

    • @LucienMavor
      @LucienMavor 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      @@passwordprotectedd Yes. 100% agree. Talk to her and also tell her to not give up, to fight and that you'll always be there for her.

    • @TheOfficialDirtyDan
      @TheOfficialDirtyDan 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      This hit close, real close, although I never found out what he went through and he passed away. Like the first person said, tell her how you feel and maybe she will see that people want her here. I’d do anything to talk to him one more time and say I would have helped.

  • @ruthiesbates
    @ruthiesbates หลายเดือนก่อน +11

    It’s rare that I cry over songs,but this one genuinely makes me sob

  • @MrsSuzzie
    @MrsSuzzie 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2160

    My dad's funeral is tomorrow. I'm thinking of using this song. It would've been his and my mother's 41st anniversary. He was only 64 yrs old. We didn't get a chance to tell him goodbye because of hospital restrictions on visitors.

    • @nagyandrea2289
      @nagyandrea2289 3 ปีที่แล้ว +53

      My mother passed away 3 months ago, she died 3 days after turning 52, we also didn't get a chance to say goodbye due to restrictions on visitors, I know it feels horrible, I hope you're doing somewhat alright though

    • @user-uq3cg4sz8c
      @user-uq3cg4sz8c 2 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      My uncle passed away a bit ago, he had two sons and a wife. He was 28 at the time. My mother's twin. We weren't able to see him either because of hospital's restrictions. It was a few months before my brother was born. My uncle never got to see my brother or his kids grow up, never got to see my mum get married. He was a good man. Kindhearted. I'm so sorry for your loss, I know how it feels. I remember being left outside and bursting out into tears when told the news. I never got to say goodbye. I know they aren't my parent but I still understand how you feel, it hurts.

    • @isuhhbel
      @isuhhbel 2 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      when my grandpa passed away we wore his shirts to his funeral. i collapsed at the ashes box, it didnt register that that was the man who raised me.

    • @Jesus-wh4sm
      @Jesus-wh4sm 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      It has been hard these years, I hope you guys are alright now

    • @deliaa3
      @deliaa3 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      my grandma passed away around a month ago. she was only 62. i’m glad other people understand my pain, i don’t think it will ever get better.

  • @SohebMalekHamid
    @SohebMalekHamid 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2334

    My mother died on the fourth of July battling cancer. I can relate to each and every word of this song as I have infact and lived every moment of this song with her before I discovered it, I was with the till the end and the only person I ever loved selflessly in this world. I love this song but I can't listen to it without wet eyes and avoid it because it only makes me cry. I wish you rest in peace maa and I will see you on the other side. I hope I was a good child.

    • @sophiusdynami3401
      @sophiusdynami3401 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      ❤️

    • @rockcallahan6160
      @rockcallahan6160 2 ปีที่แล้ว +41

      I bet she is doing great on the other side, she's proud of you and when your moment comes, she'll be there waiting for you. She loves you.

    • @mhm77887
      @mhm77887 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      im sorry for your loss

    • @animunee
      @animunee 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      you took the words right out of my mouth.

    • @SohebMalekHamid
      @SohebMalekHamid 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@animunee if you suffered the same fate, I hope you are fine.

  • @salihanuraktas9180
    @salihanuraktas9180 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +101

    I listened to this song a million times when my grandmother passed away 9 months ago...she was my everything.
    Couple months later I couldn't listen to this song anymore because it always reminded me of how I felt when I was mourning for her. I was held on to my grandfather who gave me confort and the love that i needed.
    5 days ago, my grandfather passed away... Here I am again crying while listening to this song. I don't know how am I going to get used to continue living without them. The grief is such a long and difficult journey.
    Rest in peace my beloved ones, I will always love you.

  • @robertsomervaille3720
    @robertsomervaille3720 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +14

    The opening line in the letter my mum wrote me for when she would no longer be here is.
    My dearest rob
    Sorry to have left you but it was my time to go.
    Man that opening hits hard when I read it. It's only been a month since she passed. To everyone else listening to this song, I feel your pain, it will get easier I'm sure of it, feel your sadness it's all part of what ever you are going through.

    • @fn9519
      @fn9519 วันที่ผ่านมา

      i hope youre okay, rob :)

  • @yumekojabami3361
    @yumekojabami3361 ปีที่แล้ว +1892

    3:10 "why do you cry?.."
    This part always made me wanna hug someone and cry

  • @-val-4091
    @-val-4091 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3492

    Today my grandpa passed away in the morning. When I heard the news I immediatly remembered this song.
    I was listening to this while remembering all my memories with him and looking at the white snowy forest, until I realised that his birthday was exactly on the fourth of july.
    He passed away alone in the hospital bed and no one got to say goodbye. I hope he didn’t feel alone though and felt our love towards him. Now he’s finally reunited with his love, my grandma.
    Rest in peace George. Just know that I love you very much.

    • @Marie-tw8zr
      @Marie-tw8zr 2 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      Aww im so sorry, stay strong.

    • @heyho5323
      @heyho5323 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      I´m so sorry for your loss ;( wish you the best xx

    • @nexonexo5318
      @nexonexo5318 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I‘m so sorry

    • @vonwelflingeybers7758
      @vonwelflingeybers7758 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Same happened to my grandpa. Wish I didn't know what it feels like.

    • @myac9645
      @myac9645 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Love you bb, my grandmother, a mother to me, my guide, and my strength, passed away in November last year..

  • @Smoshgoddess18
    @Smoshgoddess18 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +100

    Chills reading these comments. My mom passed away from illness at 44 years old, I had just turned 18. This song always hits me to the core. But it's also so tragically beautiful that I listen to it when I'm trying to sleep. Just puts me at peace surprisingly enough.

    • @anthuy2910
      @anthuy2910 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      same to me, but my mom at 42 and me 17. what a pity

    • @anthuy2910
      @anthuy2910 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      hha, i feel like i understand what u are feeling when listen to this song, cause i am the same as you

  • @neverbaked934
    @neverbaked934 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +33

    Depression made me apathetic, and I distanced myself from my friends and family. My grandmother died during that time. I refused to meet anyone, even her, with whom I was the closest. She was the only person I thought was the best person in the world, who would support me and didn't care if I was different or not an ideal man. She would fight for me if someone was ridiculing me. When she died, it came as a shocker, as she died quickly without any major illness prior. I was so numb to everything around me when she died; I couldn't even cry. I felt nothing; I was just filled with regrets that I couldn't meet her one last time and just sit with her. When I go to our ancestral home and see her photos, the only feeling I get is that she is no more in the world.
    I have seen many comments from people who have lost their loved ones. Cherish those who are around, because no one knows when they will leave us. May all of those who left rest in peace.

  • @snug_as_a_bug
    @snug_as_a_bug 3 ปีที่แล้ว +532

    when my mum dies im dying with her. bury me in the same casket, i love her too much to be without her

  • @aleatoric909
    @aleatoric909 8 ปีที่แล้ว +1155

    damn it
    death alone is nothing.
    watching someone else die is terrifying.

    • @Turtleproof
      @Turtleproof 3 ปีที่แล้ว +31

      I've said this hundreds of times but the only time I lie to someone is when I respond to a medical emergency and tell someone who is clearly terminal that he's going to be okay. There's no reason not to and there's that infinitesimal chance that it will release enough life-saving compounds to get her or him through.

    • @ojennlisa7w7o41
      @ojennlisa7w7o41 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Someone once said to me: "there's someone who says that having luck is to die at the right moment" now i unsderstand...

    • @01N23
      @01N23 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Alex price, you dont know how it is to die an unnatural death.

    • @aleatoric909
      @aleatoric909 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@01N23 well yeah,sure.

  • @fren-kakashi4506
    @fren-kakashi4506 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

    Enough to make a grown man cry ❤
    *while crying*

  • @Gandac11
    @Gandac11 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +33

    This song remind me of my late grandma. We were so close, we spent many nights talking about everything,listening to her telling stories from her childhood,early years,of my grandpa and everything. Everything was perfect until one night I found a text message on my mother's phone saying that my grandma had stage 4 stomach cancer. It absolutly broke me,for about a month I wasn t in the mood for everything. I watched horrified as cancer slowly kill her day by day, turning her from a beautifull strong old woman, to a frail corpse,only a shadow of the woman she once was. Grandma's pain was over on 4th of march 2023. It has been almost half a year since that but I feel her presence everyday. Miss you grandma❤

  • @seriouslyschleichstudios2294
    @seriouslyschleichstudios2294 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1257

    to whoever comes across this,
    i just want to say that you deserve so much more than what you've been through and you are worth so much more than you could ever comprehend

    • @cydneewilliams5888
      @cydneewilliams5888 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Stop omg I'm tearing up rn😭

    • @zuzanna..j_
      @zuzanna..j_ 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Wow..I really needed to hear this, I hope you're doing great and you too, are worth absolutely everything ❤ thank you.

    • @Luana-tv4yg
      @Luana-tv4yg 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      This actually made me cry, after a horrible relationship this moved something inside me, thank you so much❤️

    • @pikaspretty6051
      @pikaspretty6051 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      That made me cry :(

    • @eleanor5092
      @eleanor5092 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@zuzanna..j_ Thank you 😭🥺this made my day🥺😭🥺😭🤧🤧

  • @rolfariasdiaz2667
    @rolfariasdiaz2667 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1999

    It's lovely that people like Sufjan gives some people the confidence to share stories with an incredible level of intimacy. It's a beautiful way of connecting.

    • @erickaisla9978
      @erickaisla9978 2 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      every time I listen to this song I cry so hard, it hits differently.

  • @whos.brooklyn
    @whos.brooklyn 6 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +1

    "my firefly" "did u get enough love?"
    HEART BROKE

  • @_colorchic_
    @_colorchic_ 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +17

    My cat Freddie my sweet baby died feb 10 2024 I will forever love you and dedicate this song to you. Thank you for being there for me rest in heaven ♡

  • @eatyourkimchi
    @eatyourkimchi 9 ปีที่แล้ว +15510

    Devastating and gorgeous.

    • @utgug
      @utgug 9 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      Eat Your Kimchi

    • @randomactsofkindness4590
      @randomactsofkindness4590 6 ปีที่แล้ว +32

      fancy meeting you here!! totally agree btw.. the whole album is gorgeous but this song really does stand out

    • @malcolmjcullen
      @malcolmjcullen 5 ปีที่แล้ว +31

      I was about to post "terrifyingly beautiful", but you said pretty much the same thing.

    • @5mincer
      @5mincer 5 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Of course Simon and Martina have good taste in music ;)

    • @paulolapa3040
      @paulolapa3040 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@randomactsofkindness4590 Running up that hill - Kate Bush

  • @wooes5
    @wooes5 8 ปีที่แล้ว +3321

    The thing I love almost more than the songs by Sufjan is his fan base. The comments section is always interesting and empathetic and emotional... Its the good side of youtube

    • @ZimmerSquash
      @ZimmerSquash 8 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      +wooes5 Rarely do I find altercations and hatred.

    • @frenchtoastmafia4060
      @frenchtoastmafia4060 8 ปีที่แล้ว

      +wooes5 #yeezy4preezy

    • @randomdrops2891
      @randomdrops2891 8 ปีที่แล้ว +58

      +wooes5 the only arguments really I find are the ones about religion and whether he's singing about a dude and not just Jesus

    • @Jack-wm1zq
      @Jack-wm1zq 7 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      True. although I'm a year late to say that... still though. That's the biggest problem because some artists are great and clean, but as soon as the gain popularity the comment section goes terrible.

    • @kadenzenady7968
      @kadenzenady7968 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      wooes5 8

  • @adhamhsherief
    @adhamhsherief 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

    I miss you, dad. I hope I see you again. In a better place. A place with no sadness or problems. No regrets, and no fears.

  • @sunflower641
    @sunflower641 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    It's 2024, but still it feels like your loved one was here a few days ago.

    • @shafferfs
      @shafferfs 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      love ya

  • @dazednconfused5163
    @dazednconfused5163 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3013

    i'm laying in bed in the dark listening to this, in tears. my parents don't understand where i'm at in my life. they keep blaming it on my phone and little do they know my phone is my only escape. i have no motivation for anything anymore. this song upsets me so much because it makes me think of my younger and happier self. nothing could ever bring her down. she would be so disappointed in me.

  • @burrito270
    @burrito270 9 ปีที่แล้ว +2537

    Lie down. Try not to cry. Cry a lot.

    • @RedRabbleRouser
      @RedRabbleRouser 9 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      JonPlaysMusic lmao

    • @burrito270
      @burrito270 8 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      oh my

    • @Vingt100yip
      @Vingt100yip 8 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      ShadowXg0z should have known better

    • @ShadowXg0z
      @ShadowXg0z 8 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      it's called sleep deprivation

    • @burrito270
      @burrito270 8 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Adventure Boy it's about the death of Sufjan Stevens mother. if you look up lyric meanings and the song it should explain the lyrics verse by verse!

  • @velitasali
    @velitasali หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    I lost my dad on April 4th (a week ago), and this was what I was listening to on the evening before his death. He had small cell lung cancer, and he was tired of the pain he constantly endure, so I am happy that he does not have to suffer anymore. He always wanted to get better and return home, but fate had other plans. I was with him during his last 2 months in the hospital, and it was heartbreaking to see him worsen each day.

    • @e.k.1836
      @e.k.1836 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      So sorry for your loss!❤I am going through a rough spring. I will keep you in my thoughts stranger!

  • @starue_official
    @starue_official 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +90

    I’ve been through so much and I’m only a teenager living in this cruel world. But just recently I lost my grandmother through it all. I never got to come out to her which I regret. But this song whenever I listen to it I feel like I can feel her hugs while listening. Miss you Granny 🕊️

    • @coded3604
      @coded3604 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    • @lyricsa101
      @lyricsa101 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Be strong honey so much love for you 💓

    • @aysemiriam1578
      @aysemiriam1578 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Stay strong, we know some things aren't fair but don't give up!

  • @georgiedenbrough
    @georgiedenbrough 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2415

    My boyfriend passed away a week ago, there's no song that resonates more than this masterpiece.... Thank you Sufjan..

    • @Mia-gy9uc
      @Mia-gy9uc 2 ปีที่แล้ว +63

      I'm so sorry for your loss :(

    • @cvn3499
      @cvn3499 2 ปีที่แล้ว +36

      you doing okay?

    • @yana106
      @yana106 2 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      oh.. I'm so sorry..

    • @merlijnnelis
      @merlijnnelis 2 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      Only time will heal, my girlfriend also passed away, but it was back in 2016... And I can assure you that it takes a long road with many ups and downs, but you'll heal slowly... Take care Georgie ❤️

    • @just_p4l0sara
      @just_p4l0sara 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I'm so sorry.. Hope now he is in a better place💜

  • @dreamerx360
    @dreamerx360 7 ปีที่แล้ว +739

    every time i hear "why do you cry" i swear i wanna cry

    • @ProViLL12
      @ProViLL12 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      same :(

    • @trishavoss6057
      @trishavoss6057 6 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      I start when i hear the line "Did you get enough love, my little dove" 💔

    • @anishajmahmoud910
      @anishajmahmoud910 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      The line did you get enough love my little dove stacks the tears at 100 already. Then why do you cry just explodes it

  • @marekd174
    @marekd174 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    This song is so poetically beautiful. I never cried to a song until I found this. 😢

  • @gravityisnatural8977
    @gravityisnatural8977 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    My great grandmother died in 1999, 5 yrs before I was born. My middle name was given in honor of her. I guess recently my Dad dug up her memorial card, bc just the other day I found it lined up against the window with the rest of our relatives’ funeral cards. I was taking a good look at it in complete awe, and then I saw what her death date was - the Fourth of July. I read the prayer on the card and started crying. Missing somebody you’ve never met is hard. This song will forever remind me of her. 🩵

  • @MattDempsey5600
    @MattDempsey5600 9 ปีที่แล้ว +1851

    You've got the world crying in public places Sufjan!

    • @jsandlin71
      @jsandlin71 9 ปีที่แล้ว +42

      Matthew Dempsey When I heard this track for the first time, I couldn't help but cry. I lost my mother several years ago to a heart attack and she was only 46. This song brought back all those feelings that I thought I was getting over.

    • @MattDempsey5600
      @MattDempsey5600 9 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      ***** I was listening at my work desk trying to keep it together!

    • @yankeegmen90
      @yankeegmen90 9 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      jsandlin71 First couple of times I listened to this it brought me back to the night my grandmother died. The tone of the song perfectly matches what that night felt like.

    • @olasuszcz
      @olasuszcz 9 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      I also cried on a tran ..

    • @RedRabbleRouser
      @RedRabbleRouser 9 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      Matthew Dempsey Cried at work, had to clear my eyes and swallow the lump in my throat before I could talk to customers.

  • @jmlkinc
    @jmlkinc ปีที่แล้ว +751

    Sometimes I come back to this song just to read the tributes people have written to their loved ones in the comment section.

    • @katelyn1074
      @katelyn1074 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      Beautifully sorrow, aren’t they?
      I wish we could all be together, it feels like a real community here.

    • @imtheboss1502
      @imtheboss1502 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      yeah

    • @Gothmami15
      @Gothmami15 ปีที่แล้ว

      it's mostly because noone wants to turn their lover into your worst nightmare,the one that makes you cry and doubt the choices you've made for that person

  • @N0b0dyImp0rtant60
    @N0b0dyImp0rtant60 10 วันที่ผ่านมา +3

    I lost my grandmother (July 29,2022) almost 2 years ago she passed peacefully by a heart attack in her sleep.. She is my best friend and we would always laugh.. The last moment I had with her was when i got hurt by something.. Fly high mema🕊

  • @Shendihgal
    @Shendihgal 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

    When I listen to this music, I remember every person I have lost.
    My twin brother who didn't even have the chance to see the day. Every time I listen to this music, I imagine how my life would have been with him, and when the music stops, I remember that this Reality will never exist, and sometimes I wish our places were exchanged, that he could see the world even without me.
    To my grandmother who left in her sleep... And that when I saw her body in her coffin I didn't cry because I didn't want it to be real.
    To my dog ​​Maya who died on a Sunday, the day before my French test (I am French). When I saw her body lying on the ground which no longer moved and my mother shouted at me to come and help her carry her.. I was paralyzed.. I still have this horrible image in my mind and I never I would manage to forget...
    I screamed my sadness and my anger so much that my throat hurt, screaming for someone to give her back to me, that they had no right to take her from me.. And my mother who DARED to tell me: “Pass your French baccalaureate, do it for Maya.” my best friend and I were disgusted by her words....
    Even now when I go home, I hope every day to see her waiting for me on her couch.. And unfortunately, I'm always disappointed. And she hasn't been here for 4 months now..

  • @j.andrew358
    @j.andrew358 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1423

    My brother died in a car crash the night before the fourth of July, I was fourteen. It really hits home because this song is a different kind of sad. It sounds hollow and cold and broken rather than deeply emotional, and that's the magic of it.

    • @victoriaromero7190
      @victoriaromero7190 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      i am so sorry for your loss😔🕊

    • @abbyc7127
      @abbyc7127 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Hey, I’m so sorry for your loss. I hope you’re doing alright because this was around the time! ❤️

    • @j.andrew358
      @j.andrew358 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @Green Soul!! I'm doing much better, really changes your perspective on life

    • @raquelmartinez3765
      @raquelmartinez3765 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      My brother died in a house fire when I was 13, and I couldn't relate more to this comment.

    • @raquelmartinez3765
      @raquelmartinez3765 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @Green Soul!! Ah :( thank you for your kind words

  • @jackmcmuscles
    @jackmcmuscles 8 ปีที่แล้ว +610

    i'm gonna go tell my mother i love her

    • @annguyen2405
      @annguyen2405 4 ปีที่แล้ว +38

      U sure do. U should tell her before u can't anymore.
      Like me

    • @Menvajea
      @Menvajea 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@annguyen2405 Fuck...

    • @rithistewartx5908
      @rithistewartx5908 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Jack Morrison, ❤️❤️

    • @Bxslo
      @Bxslo 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Every day bro❤️

    • @nightshadeproductions7576
      @nightshadeproductions7576 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      My mom abandoned me and my younger siblings for drugs about 13 years ago and i only recently started to accept it and greive her she isn't the same person and has caused perminant damage to herself do she never will be the same

  • @j1ax1squ
    @j1ax1squ 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    "I'm sorry I left, but it was for the best, though it never felt right."
    Reminds me of when my dad left when he and my mom had a huge argument. At first it happened on my birthday, but they...sorta worked it out, but the second time it happened on CHRISTMAS.
    Love you so so much mum and dad. I also love you, 2021 me. Worst year of my life.

    • @mlpmoviesMA
      @mlpmoviesMA 17 วันที่ผ่านมา

      i can relate to that…it happened in 2020 for me. i’m so sorry

    • @j1ax1squ
      @j1ax1squ 8 วันที่ผ่านมา

      ​@@mlpmoviesMAmy heart goes out to you

    • @mlpmoviesMA
      @mlpmoviesMA 8 วันที่ผ่านมา

      @@j1ax1squ wishing you well ❤️‍🩹

  • @Dina4444.
    @Dina4444. 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +29

    This song is incredibly beautiful but my heart feels so heavy when I listen to it.

  • @jillyybeann
    @jillyybeann ปีที่แล้ว +2953

    My best friend Emily passed away a couple years ago, February 4th 2020. The car hydroplaned off the road, it wasn't raining but the roads were still super wet, she died instantly. A part of me is happy to know that she was never scared. She was maybe 4'11, so when the car came in on her her body was too small to handle it. She died a little over a month until her 17th birthday. Her funeral was beautiful, we had sunflowers and dragonflies and all of her favorite things. She was buried with her funkopop anime characters, stuffed animals, etc. Her body at the viewing, which was two weeks after she passed, looked absolutely beautiful. She looked like she was resting. I'll always remember our plans of moving in together, her going to college for art and me for veterinary science. I loved writing poems for her and she loved drawing pictures for me. I miss you everyday Emmy, my sunflower, my dragonfly, my little pancake. I love you, and I'll never forget our long talks, our dumb fandom interests, our cringy nicknames, I'll never forget us. Forever and always Emmy, you'll be with me forever and always.

    • @xannyx
      @xannyx ปีที่แล้ว +153

      this made me cry. you are so strong. i sincerely hope you’re doing better ❤️‍🩹

    • @bananabill2973
      @bananabill2973 ปีที่แล้ว +57

      I’m so sorry feb 4 is my birthday and I lost one of my best friends that day

    • @jillyybeann
      @jillyybeann ปีที่แล้ว +11

      @@xannyx thank you so much!! ❤

    • @jillyybeann
      @jillyybeann ปีที่แล้ว +31

      @@bananabill2973 I'm so sorry, it's terrible to lose someone on your birthday. My grandpa passed on my birthday in 2019. It's a bittersweet feeling getting older than a loved one, especially when they pass on your birthday, but keep living for them and make them proud. ❤️

    • @chs.9484
      @chs.9484 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      Rest In Peace Emmy ❤️

  • @ecila_
    @ecila_ 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3434

    Hi there. Just wanted to add few lines here. I'm from Ukraine and I was listening to this song while sitting in the basement because of bombs and rockets. I cannot express that feeling of near death, but that were surely the worst four weeks of my life. This song calmed me, when thoughts about absence of tomorrow came. This song calmed me, when the rocket fell in 200 meters near our house (our neighbors were lucky to be at another part of the house that time, so no victims from that one). It calmed me, when I left the dangerous area. And it calms me now, when I think of this whole thing continuing for 3 months already. I hate the war and people who started it. Let the sky be calm.
    Stay safe, guys. Thank you, Sufjan.
    UPD: as many of you asked, I'm okay, as well as my family. I'm home now, but the war still continues and we still are waking up to sounds of explosions. Had to get used to it, as well to understanding that I might not wake up next time.

    • @xbrownxbearx1058
      @xbrownxbearx1058 2 ปีที่แล้ว +131

      God bless your soul.

    • @emigma4784
      @emigma4784 2 ปีที่แล้ว +95

      Hey stay safe over there. Sending love from the US ❤️

    • @camithawierdo
      @camithawierdo 2 ปีที่แล้ว +70

      Stay safe I send u lots of prayer all the way from Mexico 💕

    • @mishakafauzul
      @mishakafauzul 2 ปีที่แล้ว +62

      I hope your safe. This world is horrible, I'm sorry you have to go through this. I wish peace in yours and your loved ones lives

    • @SkyBf_Yt
      @SkyBf_Yt 2 ปีที่แล้ว +31

      Made me bawl my eyes out hope you’re ok!❤️

  • @emilynelson3066
    @emilynelson3066 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +51

    Fun Game: put this in your playlist, hit shuffle and wait for it to sneak up on you. If it doesn’t, you win, if it does, you have to listen to the whole song without crying to win, if u cry, u lose and be sad

  • @shagzshokker7118
    @shagzshokker7118 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    I like to listen to this song as a way of talking to my old self, my young self which was forced to mature due to circumstances, I like to listen to this song in way of reminiscing my old memories.

    • @lastwish158
      @lastwish158 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      torn to oblivion

  • @anniemenezes1465
    @anniemenezes1465 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1187

    three days ago a friend of mine hung himself. I can't sleep without thinking about what he felt. what could i have done differently? it's really sad, he was only 18. he was a great boy and taught me so much. sweet, funny, good heart. in the past, i came here and saw some sad comments and I never thought it could be me living this kind of sadness. i close my eyes and I can see him alive. his details, his hands, his eyes. he didn't seem like himself in that coffin
    "it was night when you died, my firefly. what could I have said to raise you from the deads?"

    • @tejakausik6205
      @tejakausik6205 3 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      i'm so so sorry. if you ever need to talk to someone, i know that i'm a complete stranger, but i'm still here.

    • @danielavila1217
      @danielavila1217 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      I know that feeling.. by my self and others close to me.

    • @Cruzer871
      @Cruzer871 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I’m sorry to hear that :/

    • @suhanikadutt4718
      @suhanikadutt4718 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I am soo sorry .....
      May his soul rest in peace!

    • @pqradize
      @pqradize 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I’m so sorry for your lost and i hope he would be in a better place now.

  • @WCD87
    @WCD87 9 ปีที่แล้ว +1811

    An absolutely heartbreaking song. "The hospital asked, 'Should the body be cast?'" is when I lost it. Both my parents died in 2013, six months apart and this is easily the first song I've heard since then that offered me a sort of sonic communion with their memory. Losing people you love can become so numbing, but this made me feel something true. Sufjan's voice is so haunting and beautiful. "Make the most of your life, while it is rife, while it is light" is the takeaway quote for me from this song. A real masterpiece in my opinion.

    • @MrMinebloxian
      @MrMinebloxian 9 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      WCD87 I'm certain that my experiences pale in comparison to that, but recently I lost my dog. She had been there since before I was born and I felt lost without her. And I agree that this song reflects all loss. As I listened to this song, I imagined back when I had to walk out of the room in the veterinarian with my dog lying dead (she was 15 and very sick and we euthanised her) and the fact I felt like I was betraying her. And so I feel this song deep in my heart, where few other things can venture. Thank you for commenting this! It brought out a different part of this song for me.

    • @Maximillion666
      @Maximillion666 9 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      My mother died around the time Sufjan Stevens - Illinois album came out and i used to listen to the album as i went to visit her. I also totally lost it when he sang " The hospital asked, 'Should the body be cast?'" . I'm sorry for loss and i know that numb feeling you mentioned . Just glad there are little things in life like this that remind me of the people we lose and allow us to smile at there memory thru the tears.

    • @chipfoggers4500
      @chipfoggers4500 9 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      "And I'm sorry I left, but it was for the best, though it never felt right" gets me :(

    • @MattF012
      @MattF012 8 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      +WCD87 i hear you man. i lost both of my parents in 2014, about 4 months apart. absolutely devastating. as time's gone on i've found it increasingly difficult to move on from it. i hope you don't take this the wrong way, but it's sort of a breath of fresh air to hear someone else has experienced the same hell as me. it's so hard to find people who can relate. and as sad as this song is, it's also sort of life-affirming.

    • @suzbone
      @suzbone 8 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      +Matt and +WCD87, my deepest condolences to you both. I can't even imagine the depth of such loss. I wish you both peace and all good things.

  • @juliette_x3
    @juliette_x3 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

    I'm going through a hard time rn and I always listen to this song to make myself cry and it always works because this reminds me of a cat who died 2 years ago and I miss him so much, I never thought he would leave me n my family and I'm still not over his death and thinking about giving up

    • @Wuuudsy
      @Wuuudsy 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I’m in the same exact situation. I’ve had both of my cats for over 15 years. It’s been almost a year now since I had to put Trey down, and Helen passed of natural causes last year the morning after Thanksgiving. Not a single day has gone by where I haven’t thought of them. I want nothing more than to go back in time and have them here with me again. Something funny happened the day I came back from the vet. There was an episode of a sitcom playing on TV where the wife’s cat died, and she was upset because her husband hid it from her because he didn’t want it to interrupt his plans of going to a football game. Near the end I see her burying the cat and scolding her husband, telling him that she’s had that cat for over 15 years, same amount of time I’ve had mine. She continued on, saying a whole part of her life died today. Fast forward a little bit and I see the whole family holding hands around the grave and softly singing “Amazing Grace.” I was kind of shocked and crying, considering I had never seen that episode before until then. It was like a sign from her.

  • @lilylilylilylol
    @lilylilylilylol 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +14

    i just can’t picture myself at his funeral.
    finally this song and it’s beautiful yet painful lyrics resonate with me.
    and it hurts, more than i thought it would.
    i hope he gets better, even though the chances are low.
    i love you grandad.

    • @yourfavoritelocalnerd
      @yourfavoritelocalnerd 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      you’re not alone okay? he loves you, I know this feeling, my papa passed today, though I didn’t think it would be true but keep hope. I promise you he’ll watch over you either way.

  • @iyaniv5
    @iyaniv5 8 ปีที่แล้ว +2145

    I lost my mother to cancer yesterday. this amazing album will be with me for the coming month and so many more.

    • @WesternPaFlyFisher
      @WesternPaFlyFisher 8 ปีที่แล้ว +30

      +ilan yaniv Sorry to hear of your mothers passing. May she rest peacefully. And may you find peace in your own soul.

    • @karellegoguen-bancel5079
      @karellegoguen-bancel5079 8 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      +ilan yaniv I am so sorry for your loss. xx

    • @okan.o
      @okan.o 8 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      So sorry, for your loss. :'((

    • @andreandrad3575
      @andreandrad3575 8 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      I'll keep you and your moms in my prayers big homie, she's in heaven looking after you right now, don't worry

    • @mohamedjakata2718
      @mohamedjakata2718 8 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      +ilan yaniv sorry for your loss, man.

  • @fry530
    @fry530 9 ปีที่แล้ว +275

    "Did you get enough love, my little dove, why do you cry?"
    Oh the feels...

  • @aaronthompson8719
    @aaronthompson8719 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    “Did you get enough love ? My little dove “really hits me hard 😔

  • @monica8127
    @monica8127 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

    My dog died today. At around 10am, she embarked on a journey to a realm where beauty reigns and pain is but a distant memory.

  • @goth1cm0th49
    @goth1cm0th49 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2050

    I love this song. My cat that's on my pfp passed off to the sky two weeks ago.. I cry daily as she was my best friend and helped me through my roughest days. Always calmed me down and played with me daily. She really ment the world to me but passed due to a broken rib that pushed through her lounge..

    • @hoi-pp7ds
      @hoi-pp7ds 2 ปีที่แล้ว +44

      My cat died this thursday... it is so painful but we will get through it

    • @sofiegoldie4861
      @sofiegoldie4861 2 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      just know that she's still with u, and that she loved u

    • @helenluup5392
      @helenluup5392 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      @@hoi-pp7ds I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope you can stay strong.

    • @helenluup5392
      @helenluup5392 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      My heart goes out to you. I genuinely hope you feel better.

    • @hoi-pp7ds
      @hoi-pp7ds 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@helenluup5392 thank you... it getting a little better day by day

  • @InfoNomads
    @InfoNomads 8 ปีที่แล้ว +851

    Here I am, a 40-year-old man, holding my 5-year-old daughter as tears are pouring out after listening to this song.. I never cry about anything. Sufjan, you've destroyed me in 4 minutes and 38 seconds. Well done.. :O

    • @ayazpachapure6105
      @ayazpachapure6105 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      went up to check the length of the song

    • @SweetTooth1104
      @SweetTooth1104 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Hhjcffh Ghjvh wtf don't assume that

    • @MrJonnyYen
      @MrJonnyYen 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      The man should come with a health warning!

  • @KylieRose629
    @KylieRose629 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    This song is absolutely beautiful but heartbreaking.

  • @sloaneee2008
    @sloaneee2008 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

    I lost my best friend on December 30th and I didn’t say goodbye because I was too scared of goodbye. I listen to this and think of my regrets. I miss them so much and this song reminds me of them❤️‍🩹

  • @nicozulu5746
    @nicozulu5746 5 ปีที่แล้ว +407

    One of my best friends caught a one way ticket to the Sun today. This song is potent medicine for my heart. Thank you for sharing.

  • @grantgreider3413
    @grantgreider3413 8 ปีที่แล้ว +872

    This isn't a song, this is a storm that destroys your well-being.

  • @__j311y__f1sh
    @__j311y__f1sh 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +13

    My grandpa passed away in 2018 to lung cancer when I was 9 and now I feel a special connection to this song.

  • @axlpuff5017
    @axlpuff5017 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    This song destroyed me emotionally like nothing else. My Mother was diagnosed with breast cancer 7 years ago and fought like hell to make it through. I'm grateful every day she's still here and that I get more time with her. I've been messed up by movies, books, and other songs before. But this one roused part of my soul that's normally dormant. Life is fleeting, beautiful, brutal, and it all ends the same way for all of us. Cherish the ones you love and try and find as much happiness and light as you can before the curtain call folks.

    • @hollydaugherty2620
      @hollydaugherty2620 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I'm sorry. I'm here crying again about my dad, lost him to cancer when I was 25, in 2016. Right when this album came out. I can't really listen to this song anymore. It's too much for me. Hope you find some peace and comfort.

  • @yeedeedeezeeghee8065
    @yeedeedeezeeghee8065 8 ปีที่แล้ว +389

    both of my parents are dying from cancer, lung and prostate
    sufjan carry me away with your melancholy melodies

    • @harungezici618
      @harungezici618 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      yeedeedee zeeghee

    • @sophiusdynami3401
      @sophiusdynami3401 3 ปีที่แล้ว +34

      I hope you are okay. And life has shown you more kindness in the last four years. 💙

    • @ashes1062
      @ashes1062 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      How are you?

    • @whalesarecool1182
      @whalesarecool1182 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Hope you're doing okay, especially during these times.

    • @demi4696
      @demi4696 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I'm sorry. I hope that your parents are doing better, and I hope that life has treated you better than before.

  • @OnlyGvanca
    @OnlyGvanca 3 ปีที่แล้ว +558

    For people who never say: I love you.
    We're all gonna die...
    My cousin died 2 years ago, was his death an accident, or was it a suicide, we never find out... His birthday was on the 4 of July. Each time, I cannot help myself but listen to this song whenever I think about him. He was just 19, and a thought that in his lifetime, I never ever said I love you to him... it haunts me till now. It's not like his life, his end would change, but the thought that he would be happier if he knew that I really loved him somehow makes me sad.
    Luka, Did you get enough love, my little dove?
    I hope now you are happy and you can feel love from people who never say I love you.

  • @born2suffer_
    @born2suffer_ 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +19

    To those watching on new year's eve: If you play this at 11:59:51 P.M., the ball will drop right around the time the piano starts.

  • @shimmerisle
    @shimmerisle 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

    This song reminds me of my cat Finn who died this past July. He tried to hang on as long as he could, but it was too much after years of IMHA and vet visits and blood transfusions. I'm not sure if anyone will ever bring me the amount of joy he did. It was truely the brightest unconditional love. Then one day he was gone and the vet took his little body wrapped in a towel out of our house for the last time.

  • @Ryanbrio
    @Ryanbrio 8 ปีที่แล้ว +2820

    WARNING: The comment section my be sadder than this song.

    • @MumblesTheGreat
      @MumblesTheGreat 8 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      +Matthew Smith Brilliant!

    • @dionysiusghansah8334
      @dionysiusghansah8334 8 ปีที่แล้ว +42

      The comments section is actually really sadder than the actual song

    • @lizandrocampos8395
      @lizandrocampos8395 8 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      +Eric Lamar Dammit man. You weren't kidding. lol

    • @shayf.7658
      @shayf.7658 6 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Thank you, this stopped me from going down a hole and getting sad

    • @ypsima1
      @ypsima1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Seriously! I was crying when I read this comment and it made me laugh! THANK YOU

  • @BridgetAMusic
    @BridgetAMusic ปีที่แล้ว +870

    Rest in Peace Dad, cancer is cruel and evil. You were my best friend and so full of love. Gary Allan 1961-2022.

    • @bonjour2737
      @bonjour2737 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Im so sorry for your loss❤

    • @beingndn7353
      @beingndn7353 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      My dad died 3 months ago , I'm still in denial

    • @YourGirlSara222
      @YourGirlSara222 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Im so sorry for your loss 🕊

    • @dwade6916
      @dwade6916 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Im so fucking sorry man😢

    • @lavinacelaire8779
      @lavinacelaire8779 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Cancer also killed my dad I’m so sorry 🕊

  • @Luckysendrome
    @Luckysendrome 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    0:05 makes me feel like a light cloud

  • @delvinsonyt
    @delvinsonyt 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    My nanna passed recently, she always said to me “I love you enough for everyone”. And the “Did you get enough love, my little dove? Why do you cry? And I’m sorry I left but it was for the best though it never felt right” hits man

  • @meshudesu3020
    @meshudesu3020 ปีที่แล้ว +1597

    fourth of july is the saddest song i have ever heard in my life, but it gave me comfort when i needed it the most. It will always be my go-to song whenever I feel so sad and terrified of death.

    • @mikulover9452
      @mikulover9452 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Same

    • @iammara3196
      @iammara3196 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Same

    • @calebvaldecanas8867
      @calebvaldecanas8867 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      I love this, and Night We Met

    • @brotimwelt
      @brotimwelt 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      momento mori man. we all die. momento mori

    • @AmandaPuppette
      @AmandaPuppette 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      It only makes me more sad but it’s so good😭

  • @aljdavis
    @aljdavis 8 ปีที่แล้ว +549

    My mother took her life June 23. A song has never made me pull my car over before this one. I don't know what else to say. Thank you.

    • @ajisai3160
      @ajisai3160 4 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      I’m very sorry for your loss. It’s tough losing someone to suicide. I hope one day you will both be able to see each other again. Keep your head held high.

    • @rachelhawkins7213
      @rachelhawkins7213 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      My Sunshine, first born Son committed suicide in 2019. My stepdad committed suicide in 2009. I'm incredibly sorry for your loss. 💜💙

    • @giovannasantos5134
      @giovannasantos5134 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      hope you are doing okay. much love to you

    • @donnabruce4767
      @donnabruce4767 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@ajisai3160 I lost my love and best friend to suicide 3 yrs ago when I first heard this song in my mind it became a bout me n him , w were 2wks away from our 45th

    • @demi4696
      @demi4696 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I'm sorry for your loss. May your mother rest in paradise. ❤

  • @Tom-tj2gg
    @Tom-tj2gg 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    "Did you get a enough love my little dove why do you cry." Just makes me cry every time

  • @CynthiaIrene-ri3eu
    @CynthiaIrene-ri3eu 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

    this song is sadly beautiful. i lost my dad and sister within five months apart, and this song has a strong hold on me.

    • @Lily12473
      @Lily12473 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I'm am so so so sorry that must be so hard :( I hope you feel a little relief in this song I know I've cried from it, I lost my mom so I have a small Idea what you might feel, cry as much as you like even if people say you shouldn't bc your weak your really not

    • @onelove1627
      @onelove1627 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I'm so sorry for your loss💔 i can't imagine going through that🕊️