Ellen Fisher Ellen, don’t you think your sister deserves a man who is compassionate? Have you seen the recent video of an animal rights advocate being BEATEN to a pulp just today in North Carolina? If they’re not with us, they’re against us!
My partner is not vegan and I’ve transitioned to this lifestyle while we’ve been together. It’s difficult sometimes because I feel as though I’m right or that he should be eating the same way, caring about the same things. And even though he’s not, we can still love each other and support one another, even if we don’t completely agree. He eats vegan with me, goes to vegan restaurants, and has even defended my choice to be vegan to people before. That makes me feel so loved and is all i can ask for. Some people don’t understand that, so thank you for this video Hannah!
Same! My partner says he probably won't ever go vegan (and that's fine), but he supports me, eats with me, and understands my reason(s) for being vegan. I do think it makes us better, more compassionate advocates for veganism.
Megleighpd It must be a very strong love..my partner doesn't understand my choice as he strongly believes animals are for humans..so he can't support me for this. He is hardly accepting our difference..but we still love each other. Still wondering if the "understanding me" part is necessary to be happy in my relationship.
Amelie Langlois I’m so sorry your partner hasn’t been understanding of your choice to be vegan. My partner also believes animals are for humans, and it’s so hard when that’s the case, because there is that vital disconnect. I would say one of the most important things though is respect, that as long as he respects your choice (let’s you do you, doesn’t nag you about it, etc) that is an important place to get to. If you can make it to that point, the understanding may come or it may not, but as long as he respects you and the choices you are making for your body/the planet/the animals, or whatever reason(s) you have, things will get easier. And if you feel as though you already have that, that’s amazing! I would say that if he does say things or bother you about it, to just remind him to respect your decision. That’s something I’ve gone through with my partner when in the past he would make jokes about meat or do something that offended/hurt my feelings or seemed insensitive. Sometimes it’s on purpose and sometimes it’s not, but making sure that respect is there is super key. My partner and i still struggle sometimes, so remembering these things has helped me and him a lot, not only with veganism, but with other life decisions as well. I hope it gets easier for you❤️
Anna Kosmach Thanks Anna for your comment❤It is difficult dealing everyday about this,its been 1.5 years now and he still tries to make me eat the things he eats. Just changing "the routine"of me cooking the meals because it gets difficult for me to look at meat,more for sure to manipulate it..so respect in that term, i feel like he should cook his own thing and i cook mine..:/ but looks like a VERY hard step to do. I'm glad having talked about it i don't know any vegan and it gets hard sometimes
Compassion and love are two different things. You can feel compassion even for a sick or injured criminal, that doesn't mean you have to love them. You don't even have to love animals to feel compassion for them. I've heard of vegans who aren't what you'd call die-hard animal lovers, they just understood that empathy and compassion should apply not only to humans, but to other sentient beings too.
Gio Tag I feel that compassion is a form of love and is different from sympathy or even empathy. But lets not throw around definitions of words here. I didn’t come here to open a can of worms. What Hannah said just resonates with me. 💗
Well, not arguing about semantics, I just wanted to say that this didn't resonate with me at all. It's one thing to have compassion for both human and non human animals, but it's a very different thing to share your life with someone with whose moral principles you disagree. I'm not even saying it's a bad thing, or a good thing, everybody has their own situation and their own reasons. I'm just saying it has nothing to do with being a compassionate person or not.
I admire your openness and perspective. I would struggle with it too much to marry a non-vegan man. I’m fine interacting in everyday life with non-vegans. But to share my life, home and bed with someone - I just can’t put the difference in beliefs aside. To me it’s no different than something like racism. I can’t be against racism and marry a racist. I couldn’t be compassionate about that. No more than I could marry a man who loves our dogs, but thinks it’s okay to kill the cow in the pasture. I just couldn’t do it. I don’t know how I would raise my children in a divided home. Again, this is just my perspective. Glad you are in a happy, fulfilled marriage.
I think it's also fine to have your perspective. Someone having the same core belief system is really important to me, I'd have a hard time having a non vegan partner just like I would having one who was super conservative or very religious. I want my partner to view the world the same way I do. I think I could manage as long as our household was vegan though, they can eat meat on their own time but I wouldn't want it in the house.
xtinkerbellax3 - I agree. Comes down to core beliefs. I love to cook and actually enjoy grocery shopping (I know, strange). I couldn’t purchase meat, eggs and dairy for my husband and cook for him. It would just be too much of a struggle all around. I’m so eternally grateful for my vegan husband. We raise our daughter vegan. It’s like we were meant to find each other.
Riley Ramsey she’s not happy. I guarantee you eventually they will split and it will all come out. He knows better and should DO better. At some point an ethical human being has to WALK the walk. I feel sorry for her and hope she’s out of this nightmare soon. Happy you have your vegan partner!
I’ve been vegan for two years and my partner went straight vegan 2 months after we were dating. I often question whether or not I could date someone who wasn’t vegan. This is my problem: veganism is in direct connection with my values and my morals. For example, I feel very strongly about equality and lgbtq rights.. therefore I could never date someone who didn’t support those rights or who acted in a way that was opposite of those values. I feel the same way about Veganism. I don’t know that I would be able to be with someone who everyday acted out of alignment with my values. It is hard though considering that most people are not vegan. However, one has to wonder what the motivation is for a partner to remaining eat the way he/she does once they have been given all of the information and have the access and ability to change?. I think that would be my biggest hurdle with the whole thing. Luckily it’s not something I’ll ever have to deal with again. Very interesting conversation. I enjoyed this video.
if you plan on having children, do you fear that it will be confusing for them to hear from mom that eating animals is awful & cruel but to then watch dad eat those awful & cruel animal parts?
Vivi it will be awful. I’ve seen in the vegan parenting groups how it plays out. Parents split and it’s usually the mother grieving when the kids leave to dad’s since he refuses to feed the kids a vegan diet. It’s just non stop conflict and misery. Another reason it’s better to get married and procreate later in life after you know yourself more.
I think that they could work together and buy local, gentler raised and downed animal products. Farmers markets are a great place for stuff like that. Or they could raise their children on a meat-random diet and let the kids decide when they are older. Just suggestions.
Perhaps I can add my perspective as a non-vegan who is aware of the animal farming issues and considers herself (as we all do) a 'good' and 'moral' person. Leaving aside the fact that humans experience cognitive biases like this, between self beliefs and actions, all the time (Belief: I am a good person/good employee. Action: I waste company time surfing the internet every day.) and (often unconsciously) justify them just as often because the brain hates these cognitive dissonances ('The company doesn't pay me enough, so I won't feel guilty surfing the internet) -- the fact is that most of us love convenience and comfort and are weak-minded. I eat 90% vegan, but do regularly eat (small) amounts of chicken, seafood, and eggs. I do try to buy local, small-farm products (I live in Europe so it is easier), but I am aware that my cravings for animal products cause animal suffering. And yet I do not, and likely will never, choose to be 100% vegan. Why? Because I am weak mentally in that way. I give in to those cravings, and don't try to fight them. So the question that perhaps can help vegans not resent their non-vegan loved ones is: would you resent them if the weakness was different? Say, if they were obese and yet could not stop eating sweets. Or if they were aware that their clothes are produced in sweatshops but kept on buying those brands (perhaps many of us fall in this category). Would you still love them? If yes, then perhaps you can see how you can still love and accept a non-vegan in spite of their 'weakness'. Further, I am sure every vegan person, by virtue of being human, also has various 'moral failings' / weaknesses (including some that directly or indirectly hurt other beings) they are aware of but cannot overcome/change, yet their partner loves them the same nonetheless. This can also help build understanding and acceptance for your non-vegan partner (or friends). I hope this helps.
I do get her arguments and agree largely that I don't love my (vegetarian) boyfriend any less because he still consumes dairy and eggs, but at the same time our relationship is very young, he's said that if we moved together, he would eat vegan at home, and he respects me fully -- I honestly don't know if I would feel the same way about it if we were married or together for, who knows, 10 years. And I had told him before we got together that I wouldn't date a meateater, and that point still stands. I do think that's perhaps a little judgemental of me but as you've said, it's imo a huge moral difference. (And to be fair, I wouldn't date someone who's very religious either or someone who has very different political views. It's just a part of me and I don't think I need to silence myself either for my partner. He shouldn't change for me; but neither will I shrink myself for him.)
I️ love this, Ive been struggling with this with my boyfriend of 6 years. From now on I’m going to try to just love him instead of change him! Also, I️ have been watching you forever and I️ just want you to know that you are beyond just one of the most creative you tubers on TH-cam but you are such a light and huge inspiration. You are amazing
This video is perfect! My husband is not a vegan either and we went through the same thing as you spoke of here. But everything changed when I stopped pushing my views on him. He eats a lot of vegan meals and treats with me and we go to vegan restaurants, he loves it! People wonder how we do it and its really setting your judgements aside and allowing others to make their own choices with whatever path their on. My husband is probably the most understanding and kind about my choices. I really enjoy your videos! Xo
This is what I’ve been going through in my marriage this year especially since my daughter just started eating (she’s 8 mons). My husband and I married after 5 years together and a year later I decided to be vegetarian/pescatarian and first kept it a secret from him for 4 months. My reason being the environment. I generally didn’t eat a lot of meat. After having a baby together, it became an ethical issue as I didn’t want to partake in taking a mother’s milk away from their baby. It has been a struggle for sure. I thought about getting counseling. We both agree we will let our daughter decide what she wants to eat and a Whole Foods plant based diet is best for her right now. I love how vegans should be compassionate to both animals and humans and I’m still trying to be respectful of his choices and subtlety provide facts about the meat industry or nutrition. I love to know that I’m not alone.
Thank you for making this. My husband is also non-vegan but eats plant-based because he cares about the environment. That's totally fine with me now! I still lecture him on nutrition sometimes, but I agree I think it's easier to talk to people and help them in this way. It's much easier to encourage people to eat less animal products.
It’s nice that you have gotten over the fact that he refused to be vegan with you. I could never be in a relationship with a non vegans this point in my journey, it may sound harsh to some I guess but it’s just a line for me. (Just like I could never be with someone who is a homophobe or like an super conservative person.) I’m just so grateful for my partner he went vegetarian then vegan along with me three years ago now. I can accept everyone else in my life not being vegan like my family and friends but my partner is not one of them. That’s just me though if my partner had been less open to the idea I probably wouldn’t have had he strength to stick with this lifestyle, I need a support person.
Angel Wilcox sounds like my exact same story! It’s a blessing to have a partner make the connection and seek to live a life that reduces cruelty as much as possible! I’ve been pretty harsh on here admittedly, but my intentions are good - I want people to seek the best possible relationships they can for themselves and seek to stay aligned with their value systems. After all, having a value system is really what makes us human.. and once you know the truth and you see the suffering, you are forever changed.. I think ultimately conflicts are going to arise otherwise. Especially when children are involved.
my husband and I met when we weren't vegan. I watched a documentary and wanted to go vegetarian. We watched Dominion together so I could show him why (was the first time I watched it) and instead if vegetarian we went vegan at the same time :') He is a very nice person and I'm happy we had no problems, since he was just as compassionate as me when it comes to sentient beings
last sentence: "how can we preach compassion as vegans iv we only love people on the condition that they are vegan to?" my opinion: I want to spend my life with a good person, and good persons decides to do good things. Beeing okay with murder and torture of animals for my own taste preferences is not a thing that good people do. Am i judgemental? No i am not, because i believe that most perople are just not educated enought on the topic. If My mom and my brothers would know what i know abought the Ethical, enviromental and health side of veganism they would change theyre behaviour. I try not to be preachy, but if the situation is right i try educate them. (its very hard for me to wait for them) My boyfriend watched earthlings with me. (i have not seen the movie fully till today because i just cryed so badly that i have to stop) He...just dont care. He has seen the teribble things that happend to the animals. And he know how delicious and convinient vegan food . (because i have nioce cooking skills and we were out eating vegan very often) I was so disappointet because he...just dont care. He is now my ex. I just cant life with such a person as my soulmate.
veronika veitz you are awesome. ❤️ you will be rewarded for sticking true to your morals. You will know happiness and peace. There’s plenty of vegan guys out there and more every day! 👍
Because in some countries is very expensive. I truly hate how some vegans are so full of themselves. Animal brutality is one of the thousands of world problems out there. You probably use a cell phone that most likely have been crafted by an underfed sirian child. And there are a lot of examples like that. The hypocrisy is unbelievable.
@@popodopulus3826 no you justify not being vegan with the fact that that we are also flawed... So I am guessing you don't won a cell phone then? Guess what we are people also. In our days no one lives without a cell phone unless you are living I don't know where... You can live without meat. Most of us can at least.
@@anacatarina117 Is easier for women because men need animal protein in larger amounts. If you are going to preach about something so passionately I suggest you also become communist. Or at least the least capitalist possible. I know plenty of people who doesn't own a phone. Did you know that for the salad that you eat millions of bugs have been murdered because of pesticide? Don't you care about that? Also the pesticide harms the environment.
My husband a I have been together for 8 years but married for 1. During the first year of marriage I turned vegan (for animals, health, and planet) and haven't looked back. But, my husband is not and my oldest son is not. My youngest (2) is being raised vegan. My oldest (5) understands what veganism is. There are certain things he picks and chooses to eat. Since he was not raised from the start vegan, I have eased him into understanding why mommy and brother don't eat the same way. During all this it's been an ongoing battle on how we raise our children and how I care for our family being vegan. I definitely needed to hear this. Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart for sharing this video with the world. I'm sure a lot of people can relate to this and I'm sure it's definitely brought peace and contentment to hearts and minds. I know for my self it has. Lots of love ❤️
I agree with what you said but I also heard a life coach talk about unconditional love to be bogus because it doesn't make any sense. You can't be loving someone or something no matter what they do or what happens. Maybe conditional love is the more realistic approach to love.
I'm binging videos because I discovered your channel a few days ago and I love your personality. I love this video so much. I have been with my boyfriend for over 8 years, I went vegetarian a few years ago and now I'm plant based and moving towards being more ethically vegan...but he still eats meat and I'm ok with that. I never want to be pushy or overbearing and I've noticed that he does eat more vegetables now than ever before (he's extremely picky) I also appreciate when we're trying to find places to eat out of town and he's like "oh look they have vegan/vegetarian options". I love that even though he doesn't eat this way that he is always thinking of me in that way. It's so sweet honestly. Sometimes it's the little things.
Hannah, oh my god, thank you for this!! I was really needing a video like this about a year ago because that's when my partner and I were having issues between us regarding our lifestyles and ethical beliefs. We're doing a lot better now, but seeing that others go through/have gone through this and there's light at the end of the tunnel is so reassuring. I feel so much love and acceptance for my partner and she for me. I love how supportive she is of my lifestyle and beliefs, even though she doesn't feel them herself. And I respect where she's at as well. I was in her shoes once and I know how hard it is to let go of social conditioning and lifelong habits. She's a beautiful soul and does care for animals a great deal. I've seen her in action helping both children and animals who have gotten lost or been separated from their guardians. She shows care and kindness towards every living being and doesn't tolerate abuse. She's usually the one to wrangle bugs (and even lizards!) when they show up in our home and helps them return to their natural habitat. I wouldn't trade her for any vegan in the world and wouldn't want her to change for me. I support her no matter which path she chooses. I'm just grateful she's chosen to go on this journey through life with me.
My boyfriend became more open when we started getting serious about life long commitment, and I expressed how I was worried about how we’d live, particularly with children, if we had such opposing morals. When I put it in a way that it would make me more comfortable with our relationship that we were open, he was immediately more willing to hear about it. He watched What The Health on his own, and started Earthlings with me before i had a melt down about the contents. He at least eats vegetarian when we’re together, and when we move in together in about a year, he plans to go fully vegetarian, and transition to veganism from there. He’s truly amazing, and cares about me so much that when he truly realised how important it is to me, he tried to see it too.
Thank you so much for this Hannah! I have on occasion felt judged by fellow vegans for happily living in a long-term relationship with my omnivore boyfriend. But when you love someone, you love them through it - you don't expect perfection and you don't try to change them! I have lots of faults and bad habits - I buy new clothes, I sometimes use plastic, and I have been known to toss a peanut butter jar because they are impossible to clean out before recycling. But I try. And my boyfriend eats meat and dairy, but he's cut back a lot since we've lived together! All you can do in a relationship is support each other, love each other, celebrate successes, and forgive shortcomings. No two journeys are alike, and no one person is perfect 😊
PREACH IT GIRL!! I can definitely relate. Overcoming the initial preachy stage of veganism takes time and lots of paying attention, but once you humble out, life feels lighter.
I really needed to hear this!!! But, first omgosh!!! How did I not know you had a TH-cam channel!!! I love your sisters videos. And now I’m already in love with you too!! My story is very similar to yours!! I went plant based first then the veils were lifted!! It has been almost a year that I have went vegan. My husband of 12 years has no desire to be vegan. I’ve felt like a bad vegan because he did not join me on this journey. I love my husband so much!! And your last statement, “How can we preach compassion if we only love people on the condition that their vegan too.” Really hit close to home for me!!! Thank you for sharing this with others!! On a plus note one of my three children went vegan with me and so did my parents!!! One voice can make a difference!!! Can’t wait to watch many more of your videos!!! 😍
This video made me feel so good about my relationship. I have a non-vegan boyfriend and I understood that being vegan is not a fast decision to make. Everyone has their own time to process this whole world that veganism can be. I'm vegan for a year now, and I'm still in that process, learning and feeling different about all the living things. And, gosh, it can be hard to fight against the common sense, we all know that. Being non-judgemental can be way more "usefull" for the veganism. Making food for my all family, and not just for me, made them learn that it can be easy to be vegan, but it just happened because I had eaten with non-vegan peaple a lot of times.
Love this!!! I’m married & my husband is not vegan and we are still learning the ins and outs of how this works because I transitioned after our marriage. One thing that has never changed is our love for each other. Awesome message!! ❤️
Thank you for this video! I love watching all of your videos and everything you stand for! You and your sister are my role models!! I also have a non vegan partner but we are raising our daughter (5) vegan. He completely understands the health aspect of it, and also eats mostly vegan at home. At first, it was difficult to teach this to a child, but once I took the compassionate route, it came a little easier. I tell her we love others even though we may not like what they do. And she amazes me for a 5 year old! She often questions him and others why they aren't vegan and you can see they begin to question themselves. It's nice to know there are others out there like this (as much as I'd love it if my partner went vegan!!). Just, thanks for all you do!
Thank you so much for this Hannah ! I really needed to hear this. Specially the last sentence. Please continue to make great content like this, I love how real you are.
WOW, Hannah... love this. I also have a partner who isn’t vegan and what you are describing here is something I have been working toward in my mind slowly, but I haven’t yet put the words to it and I still struggle a bit. But THIS is so so important and it helps so much to hear out loud because now I can acknowledge that growing thing in the back of my mind. Your love for your partner is so clear in this video and it’s so inspiring. Thank you.
All these comments 'I could NEVER be with a partner who's not vegan' all single, talking about their future hypothetical 'perfect' partners who they'll probs never find. Guess I should just divorce my husband of 9 years, cuz I decided to be vegan 2 years ago. Get off your friggen high horses. The real world doesn't work that way.
Samantha Shearing YOU get out of your high horse! If you could be with someone that is not vegan good for you! If I can't, that's doesn't mean I'm less good than you!! To each it's preferences!
Hanna S. My comment is in reply to all the arseholes judging this woman and her relationship. If you read my comment and think that's me saying specifically that you are 'less good' then me, that's in your own mind. Try not to take things so personally.
It's not just what a person eats though. It's a very complex lifestyle full of good intention. It would be like finding out your partner is a serial killer, because essentially, they are (or maybe consistently hires hitmen, if ya wanna be literal). And you're just supposed to accept them, love them, sleep next to them after finding all this out?
Madison Taylor Aprox 2% of the world's population is vegan. Comparing serial killers to people who are eating what 98% of the population eat? So ridiculous. So you were a serial killer and then one day you woke up and you're perfect now because you're vegan? But before that day, you were a horrible person who didn't deserve love? So you're an omnivore for 27 years, you're with your partner for 7 of those, and then you decide to go vegan and because he continues to live as you BOTH previously were, as most people on this planet do, you expect people to end their relationship? Because the vegan is now perfect and the meat eater is suddenly evil. Only vegans should find love and breed... well I suppose that's not a bad thing, the planet would be better off without all us humans and your plan is a sure-fire way to end humanity. Until then, I'll stay in my loving marriage and I'll be proud of all the positive changes I've bought to our lives through my veganism.
I never thought about it this way but you are absolutely right! I will keep that in mind when hanging out with non-vegans in the future and try to be more understanding.
For years I ate a plant based diet and just recently (since having my daughter) have switched to being an ethical vegan. It has made me rethink alot of my life, especially relationships. For some reason alot of people I watched on TH-cam or read about seemed to be preaching about being vegan as an absolute truth and the only way to live. As much as I did agree with alot of what they said something just didn't sit right. I have a non vegan partner as well (who 100% supports my lifestyle and the fact that I want to raise my daughter as a vegan) and I found myself thinking "how can I be with someone who isn't a vegan?!". This video helped me SO much. The last line in your video resonated with me at such a deep level and really helped me settle this internal battle in my head! Thank you!!!
I am 100% resonating with this video!! The person I love is Non Vegan. And if he went Vegan tomorrow, I wouldn't love him any more than I do right now. Compassion is key. That includes compassion for humans. Thank you Hannah!💜💜💜
I’ve never felt more at ease about this because I’ve been having this issue lately and I’ve been so pushy about it and it’s only been making me mad and frustrated and really hasn’t been changing anything. Thank You for making me feel better about this, for helping me realize that maybe Vegan and Non Vegan relationships can work with a change in myself
Great video! I'm vegan for more than 2,5 years now and I'm in a relationship for a little more than 2 years with my boyfriend. So I was 16 when I met him and he was 17. Which means that the both of us changed a lot during that time, and that's a huge struggle for us. we don't have a lot of same interests anymore and our lifestyles are very different. But we still love each other and don't know whether we should accept that we changed to much or whether we should keep trying to make it work. Being vegan isn't even the biggest "problem" although it is one if the things where we are way too different. As he knows about everything but doesn't want so see it. And I became way more passionate about it than I was in the beginning.I also love cooking so much and he doesn't like that, Same as all the other hobbies that I have. While I don't like his hobbies besides watching the same films and series, but that just isn't enough...
This is the second time I have watched this and I cried again. My husband and I got married two and a half years ago as strongly believing Christians. I became an atheist 6 months later and we have had a very hard 2 years (the fact that I’m closeted from most people in that doesn’t help). We also have the fact that I am 90% vegan and he is not, but the religion thing is why this video speaks to my heart so dearly. Thank you for all you do, but especially thank you for this. You give me hope for the future.
I LOVE THIS VIDEO. I LOVE THE MESSAGE BEHIND IT. I LOVE THAT YOU PUT IT OUT INTO THE WORLD SO OTHERS CAN HEAR IT!!!! THIS IS ULTIMATELY WHAT PEOPLE NEED TO UNDERSTAND. It does not matter what people do with their life. Focus on you. Don't focus on what you don't agree with.
Good on you Hannah. My boyfriend is vegan and I'm not. I've never felt judged by him, and I honestly think that is the reason why 1) we're still together after almost 7 years, and 2) I'm (without even noticing it) for some reason slowly almost have become vegan myself. I know a lot of people can't fathom how you could know about the horrors that accompanies the making of animal products and still not be vegan, and I really don't even myself have a logical explanation. I guess I just haven't "clicked" yet. I guess my point is that in my head, when it comes down to it all, what would benefit the animals the most is to reduce (in the end eliminate) the use of animal products, and apparently being loving and accepting of others is a very powerful way of doing that. I truly believe that your voice is coming from a very powerful place being married to a non-vegan, and are very happy that you're raising your voice as I could imagine it could be a bit of a "taboo" in the vegan community. Best regards
After a year of living with my boyfriend, he decided to go vegan. He is now 6 months vegan and always tells me why I didn’t make him before. My response is always, “I can’t make you do anything, is something you had to decide on your own”. He loves being vegan and talks about it all the time. It honestly made our relationship 10x greater 💕
Really good video! My husband and I have very fundamentally different food taste profiles. Our 16 year old son is with me and our 15 year old daughter is with my husband. Cooking for our family leaves me frustrated, confused and sad. This video is a great way to reframe those feelings of mine, instead of constantly wondering why my husband and daughter won't change to be more like me and my son. Thanks so much for this!
I really don’t think I’d ever be able to date, let alone marry someone whose not vegan so kudos to you... I think it’s also crazy that he knows the truth yet doesn’t change. Kind of odd but that’s okay, to each his own
Korina Trudel Her transition was actually from plant-based to ethical vegan. So, her husband was familiar with the diet prior to marriage, but not the ethical angle.
Well I think it is looking at the person for who they are and not what you want out of them.. I am a Christian who is deep in my faith.. my partner is Atheist.. We Find a happy medium.. He lets me openly pray and bow his head at meals when I pray.. I dont force him to go to church or read.. In the End I am very happy.. Yes I dont understand why he dont Beleive in Jesus and Yes he dont understand why I do.. People who you generally get along with and Love deeply is very very rare for most people.. Sure Finding a vegan might be great but what if your soulmate is not a vegan???
This is so inspiring, a while ago I left my previous relationship where my ex was not vegan and I told myself that I would never date someone again that wasn’t vegan but you can’t help who you fall in love with. My girlfriend now is not vegan at all but she totally supports me and loves eating vegan food if I make it for her. Thank you so much for giving this subject a much more positive light.
Thank you soooo much for this video. I've been married 4 months to a non-vegan and vegan for 1 year. It has been very difficult for us and has put a lot of strain on our relationship. But after watching your previous video on letting go, I finally did do just that. And it's made a huge difference. Letting go of the responsibility of turning everyone I love vegan has brought a lot of peace to my life. I will always fight for the voiceless, but, like you said, compassion starts at home. I feel so much more confident in my decision after watching your video. Thanks Hannah!!
Thank you so much for sharing this Hannah! That core of unconditional love and compassion is so important for relationships to flourish and sustain over time. I've struggled with dismay around my parents and partner being meat eaters, and have tried in the past to guilt or inform them into become vegan or at least vegetarian. This never gets a good response. They just feel harassed and it shuts down communication. We don't give up on our own ethics and boundaries by showing love and compassion to those who don't share our views. It's simply a better way to interact with everyone in our lives. It takes practice, and I'm far from perfect! This is such an important reminder to those who differ in any type of belief. We need more loving and compassionate discussions and debates in the world right now.
I was pushy and judgemental towards my husband. As soon as I stopped trying to control his situation I just accepted it...well he is now a full-blown vegan. We can't show people the truth they need it to be revealed to them in their own unique way.
I have a genuine question and would really love to know what you think about this : My sister has 6 lovely hens she has as pets. ( They are fed and kept better than some humans I know) Either way they are completely loved and roam free every day and go into their amazing coop at night on their own to protect them from the creatures that lurk in the night; then let back out in the morning. Now I don't see a problem eating their eggs because they lay them regardless so they are not being harmed or forced to do so. They are also not fertile because there are no roosters present. I was wondering what your thoughts are on supporting local "happy" farms (similar to my sisters situation where they have happy pets that also produce things naturally) or friends that have a situation like this where there is no stoping the lay of the egg or even local honey farmers that are creating homes for these honey bees that need it because they are endangered. Purely curious on a vegans or multiple vegans views on this. I do not eat meat or other dairy products ( I don't even eat my sisters chickens eggs) But am curious on if someone sees an issue with it. Sorry for the long post. Love you Hannah!!
The only thing I would say is buying the hens in the first place to keep as pets could be supporting an unethical farming practice, apart from that I personally would have no issue with it. I have a friend who rescues ex battery hens who lay on average once a day. I have no problem eating those eggs as they are from happy hens who have been rescued from awful conditions. Honey again confuses me, but I feel like supporting honey farmers has more overall benefits for the environment and animals (increased biodiversity etc.) than downsides.
Lizzy Weber thank you for responding! She also did lots of research on where her babies were coming from and from what she could find it all was all rescue but again i did not do the research myself. That is a great point though. Rescues are always the way to go 😍 thank you again I’ve been so curious about this topic lately ❤️
Hannah you really hit the spot with this video and I can totally relate to your message on a personal level. I went vegan during my previous relationship and was super pushy about it to my partner. Whenever he ate animal products I would roll my eyes or lecture him about where they came from. This resulted in him eating even more animal products, because he wanted to annoy me just as much as my pushiness annoyed him. In my current relationship I never made a big deal out of veganism to begin with. However, when my boyfriend had or has any questions I'm more than happy to answer them and he knows that I am very passionate about veganism. So he supports me, and he eats vegan with me all the time and even agreed to watch some documentaries on the topic with me. He also accepts that my apartment is a vegan place and is happy to, for example, have his coffee with oat milk in the morning instead of cows milk and appreciated whenever I cook a vegan meal for the two of us. Letting go is so so important and has made me grow as a person as well - knowing that people are more than their lifestyle choices and that we shouldn't love them any more or less because of the choices they make.
I think this is a pretty common thing and so far your the only TH-cam (I’ve seen at least) talk about this subject. Being as this subject directly affects my life it was nice knowing that you got through it. It’s very difficult seeing everyone around you.. except yourself.. not only contributing to the slaughter of beautiful animals, the destruction of our planet but ultimately the destruction of themselves. I’ve been vegan for one year now, lots of mess ups and not knowing what I’m doing lol but videos like these help. I don’t feel so alone. My husband accepts it but just can’t get on board with it. He even still constantly asks me if I want meat, or dairy and I have to be like no thank you 😟 he has tried to eat more plant based options so that’s a plus. Thanks for your always amazing uploads Hannah 🖤🖤
My husband is not a vegan... but he is open minded enough to eat what ever I cook... He just has huge portions of my vegan food... Sometimes I'll buy him a roastiserie chicken and just add chicken to his plate. When we go out, he eats what ever he likes. He is amazing and never criticizes what I cook! I honestly cannot complain!
I wrote a long blog post about this topic once and I just want to share a different perspective. My partner wasn't vegan when I met him, but quickly went vegan after we met because of what I taught him. If he hadn't after years and years, I don't think we would still be together. And this has nothing to do with love, it's about long-term living. Long term I want to be with someone who respects animals and respects themselves as much as I do. I should want that for myself. For long term compatibility, you should also choose someone who has similar goals as you, wants the same amount of children, etc. Too many people separate because no one should have to compromise on their major life choices. In the end, someone always ends up compromising if you're not on the same page. There are other people in the world who would align with you on those things. And of course, I understand "soulmates" and such but are they really your soulmate if they're okay with animals being killed in our industries? I just feel that we, as vegans, should expect more from our partners in life. We deserve someone who feels the same way.
It would be delightful if your hubby makes the commitment too!! Especially for the sake of your children to come. Its very hard to bring children up in a divided home ... many marriages fail due to husband and wife being in different religions, like a Jew and Christian or Muslim and Christian .... so also veganism and carnism there is a chasm between you ... its invisible but its there, no matter how hard you try and ignore it .... All I can say is stick to your veganism ... your marriage is still young, time will tell if your husband has the same compassion as you, because the way I see it right now is - YOU are the loving and compassionate and loyal one ... the glue that holds your marriage together .... but the love, compassion and glue should be equal, otherwise youre in an unequal yoke. Still .... what ever you do and decide .... its your life and you must live it and my hope is that your husband will see the light so that he can also be enlightened like you are!!
The people I love the most -my parents, friends, and boyfriend- are not vegan, and it was (sometimes still is) hard for me, because I'm certain that this is the healthiest and most sustainable lifestyle. But I try my best to spread knowladge, and everytime I have the opportunity I make them delicious vegan meals to show how awesome veganism is. :) And I'm extremely grateful for their support, my mother is the best, she cooks vegan dishes for me every singe day
Omg! Thank you so much for this video. This is me and my husband. He’s utterly respectful but doesn’t agree with veganism for its ethical reasons. He’ll eat vegan meals but doesn’t want to ONLY eat vegan. Plus, i became vegan a few years after my kids were born so they’ve grown accustomed to their animal products too. I never tried to force my husband to be vegan but I definitely tried to educate him and he won’t listen. So yes love and acceptance. Once I was able to make this shift, our relationship got better. But honestly, it’s this way with religion and politics for us too lol I guess you can say it’s an “odd” match but our love keeps us going. I’d love to hear of some vegan meal ideas to keep my husband interested! ❤️
Well said!.. Compassion and love over judgement and hate!.. My husband didn't go vegan went I made that lifestyle choice.. Two years after he decided to eliminate all meats and milk (still eats cheese and eggs sometimes).. Was his choice and I didn't push at all. He loves eating plants and nuts, legumes, soy.. he doesn't miss meat at all.. so proud of him. It will be 4 years for him in July...
Hey Hannah! I hope this comment doesn't come out rude, I'm just confused and curious so I thought I'd join in on the conversation. I totally agree in compassion and not pestering your partner to go vegan but I'm just wondering what his reasoning for not going vegan is? I went vegan when my fiancé and I had been dating for about 8 years. He wasn't sure about it. I was pushy (but not judgemental) for a couple of months when I really started getting into it and then when I stopped pushing and just started sharing information with him he eventually came to it in his own time. Looking back, it happened very quickly and it wasn't ever a point of contention between us. This is where my comment can be misinterpreted, hopefully I can word this right; I'm just wondering why it's taking so long for your husband to go vegan? I don't mean that he SHOULD just because it's "the only way" but I just wonder if you are such an activist and he is around you all the time, how has it taken this long for him to hear all the wonderful things being vegan can do for the world? I mean, I personally believe the future is vegan and would love for everyone to go vegan on the spot. I don't judge people and I have never thought down of anyone who wasn't vegan. I've never had a problem with other people when they aren't seeing my side of the story but I stay armed with knowledge so if the subject ever comes up I know that I am speaking intelligently and not just slinging my biased opinions around. Again, I hope my words don't come across as rude, I'm by no means judging or trying to talk down to you or your husband, I'm just curious as to where the disconnect is. Sending positive thoughts your way
Stephanie Eva Probably because meat is delicious and not everyone wants to give up things they enjoy. Not everyone cares how certain things end up on the shelves
I have asked this question about my partner ever since I went vegan. The food in our home is vegan, and he usually enjoys all vegan restaurants we go out to, however when we go out to eat or have dinner with the family he almost always chooses the meat option. Whenever we have conversations about diet, he usually agrees or comes to an understanding of why veganism is the optimal choice for health. But I am the only vegan in his life, our friends and family all eat a traditional American diet and we live in a small town where veganism isn't a trend. I feel that my partner is still on the fence about eating plant-based is because meat eating is SO heavily influenced. His brother also owns a small livestock farm, so when they're together he hears about the hoopla of grass-fed beef and pork, cage free/hormone free chickens and turkeys, raw milk, and how sustainable small organic farms are (all which he knows I completely disagree with). Some people are just more influenced by who believes what around them. Some people have a hard time breaking away with the beliefs of a standard American diet. Some people just take a lot longer to make the connection to veganism. So people just flat out don't want to change and enjoy their meat-eating habits. Whatever the reason. . I still hope that one day he will make the commitment to be plant-based. If not, that's okay! I'm really happy and lucky my partner supports me and enjoys the food that I eat. Best!
Beauty By Syddd from the tone of your comment I'm guessing you're saying it's fine not to be vegan and we shouldn't care as it only affects ourselves. This sort of selfish attitude is so sad because you don't have to bother even thinking about what it would be like to experience the actual horror and terror and suffering every single animal you eat has to feel. Apathy has been the cause of all great injustices in the world and it's not something that should be encouraged
Stephanie Eva my partner is not vegan and I am, and when we’ve spoken about it he agrees that it’s the healthiest way to eat and that it makes him feel his best. But he also does not think that humans and animals are fundamentally the same (basically don’t need similar rights) and he also doesn’t agree that we aren’t supposed to eat meat. He also has said that one of his biggest issues is that he doesn’t want his freedom in eating whatever he wants to be taken away. Which I know sort of sounds silly because to me meat isn’t even food, but where I feel as though veganism is abundance and has opened me up to so many cuisines and flavors, he feels restricted. These are just his reasons, and I wanted to share. Also, to others who may read this thread, please understand that no one is perfect and I am just sharing my experience. My partner and I talk about veganism a lot with each other, but I don’t force anything because, at least with our relationship, that has never been productive, just as Hannah describes in the video. If he ever does come around to veganism, I want it to be because of his own choice, desires, and beliefs, not because he feels forced and judged
Rube not trying to be an ass but when reading text the one reading it puts the tone. I didn't get that at all from her comment. 1st) Most people that grew up eating meat think it's delicious. 2nd) it's hard to give up something you love regardless of how it effects yourself and or others especially if everyone else around you is doing it. Please don't judge. That's not how you help the animals and or our environment.
Thank you so much for this video, Hannah. It’s extremely helpful 🥰. The thing that’s the hardest for me trying to live a vegan lifestyle is not buying items made from animal’s skin. Before we chose this lifestyle, we already had some large items made from leather(sofas, seats in cars, steering wheels in cars.....), and it make me feel like a hypocrite. They’re large, expensive items I can’t financially justify getting rid of right now.
thank you for this video, hannah! my partner isn’t vegan either and at first i felt uneasy about it... they’d make the usual jokes and eat meat in front of me which always upset me but i tried to not say anything because i didn’t want to be one of “those” vegans. my vegan friends would give me crap for dating a non-vegan and that really bothered me. i tried to stay as respectful and grounded through all this so they could explore veganism on their own, not because of their partner. now a year later we both have grown so much! they eat nearly 100% meat free and i feel more relaxed about the jokes from all non-vegans. i really think if you life a positive, healthy and compassionate life the people who care about you will see it and will respect you for it. (and possibly emulate it!) my partner said one of the coolest things about me is that i’m vegan, which they definitely wouldn’t have said a year ago. growth is beautiful!
This is really inspiring to me. For a long time, I pressured my husband into going vegan. I feel that my nagging only pushed him farther away from wanting to try. When we got together, he was a non vegan who ate meat every day. I remember being angry that I was spending my dollar on his groceries. However, when I finally realized that I loved this man regardless of what he chose to eat, I realized it was important for him to make his own decisions and connections. He is now a vegetarian for over a year and I am so proud of him. He is proud of himself too. He is not ready to go vegan and has expressed this to me, instead of being hard on him about eating eggs and dairy, I tell him how proud I am of him for getting the meat out if his diet. Together we have a healthy balance and because I do the cooking he is always eating beautiful vegan meals. I have let go of the nagging and let him be himself. Although I hope that one day he will make the connection, I no longer believe it is my ‘duty’ to change him. He is his osn person. We are now expecting a child and he is extremely encouraging to me about raising him vegan. Loving unconditionally is a beautiful way to love!
Beautifulminds it sounds like your husband is making real progress. Hannah’s husband however is not and never intends to. He uses his meat eating as a way to emotionally dominate her. Notice how he’s not in these vids explaining himself? He’s a coward
starstuff100 I dont see Hannah as dominated in any sense, however I do not know her personally. She comes across as a strong valued woman with goals and is making a great impression in this world. I believe in compassion for all, even if I dont agree with what others are doing, I still have compassion because one day long ago, I was just as blind. Hannah has chose to love her husband through and through, there may be many reasons behind him not being on this video explaining himself, maybe he was not asked to be involved in this video? Im not sure. All I know, for myself, is that I am proud of where my life stands having compassion for all and I am truly proud of myself for allowing my husband to come into his realizations on his own terms. Again, I dont agree with people who eat meat dairy and eggs, but it is obvious that Hannah loves her hubby for reasons other than his dietary choices. We are all at different stages, maybe one day he will see, and maybe he wont, but I will continue to have compassion for her and him and their relationship and I hold respect in my heart for her regardless of who she loves.
I can't have a non-vegan partner, it's a compromise and I am not ready to make that. How can you let go your partner and still be passionate vegan? How does it work? Isn't it the same thing with if my son rapes someone, I will forgive him but if someone else does that, I want that person to get jail. Very confusing.
one sec how can you accept someone who supports cruelty? Isn't there a basic flaw in what you are trying to convince yourself so that you can be happy? Love, beliefs, religion makes us blind and maybe you are blind in this unconditional love and I personaly respect that but it's not a valid argument
don't consider my comment as rude in any way, I am just lost in your argument and I hope if your husband really loves you, he will understand how much you love animals, and he stops murdering them.
This is awesome and really encouraging! I am in a slow transition to veganism (over the last 3 years) been over a year vegetarian and on and off "vegan" due to the ethical reasons. My husband is not and I still feel pressure to make him meat for dinners and with our first child due any day, the talk of how our kids will eat has put some strain on the relationship. I love him to the moon and back and just wish he was open to the idea of having some meatless dinners/lunches. Even with all the protein break downs and delicious meals I have recreated, there is no change. This helped me step back and reevaluate and appreciate all the other things we have going for us!
Audrey Clark you’re a good example of what can happen in these “mixed” marriages. Kid isn’t even here yet and you’re already arguing! You’re the one that’s going to push the kid out. Tell your husband that YOU will then decide how the kid eats! And if he doesn’t like it bring his ass to this comment section and I’ll be happy to lay into him 😁
We don't sit around arguing all the time about it, I was just stating that its a bridge we haven't figured out how to cross yet. Our marriage is always and will always be a partnership and I wont man handle the situation to get what I want...I was just voicing how I appreciated the reminder from Hannah of all the other positive things that come with having a non-vegan husband. I may even find some great positives to how we end up proceeding with our family. I feel like I've learned a lot already.
You are so right!! I just can't get over the health factor and letting my husband, family, friends and co-workers how bad is for their health when they are the ones complaining to me how bad they feel about their ailments! It's so hard to not say anything to them when I care about them so much and know how easy it is to feel better by just eating vegan! Thank you for sharing, though - it does help.
Thank you for sharing 🙏🏾 I had a previous chronically ill partner, almost every month and throughout the week - issues with stomach, diarrhea, headaches, just discomfort in general. No idea why this was happening. She is a heavy meat-eater. Most of her diet, and claims it helps her body/the only thing she can really eat. Being a vegan, I always had in the back of my mind the connection of eating SO much meat, every single day was why this was happening… It’s so sad.. 😪
The best thing is having a vegan husband! Both of you are saving lives! But sometimes I wish he wouldn’t eat my snacks! Lol you’re a wonderful human being Hannah! You and your husband. :)
I would like to thank you for this video. My boyfriend is a vegetarian and I am a vegan. When we started our relationship I was eating meat and he didn't judge me or was pushing me to turn into a vegetarian. When I become a vegan I can't tell him to stop eating cheese because it would be unfair. He loves vegan food and we go to the vegan restaurants but if he want to order regular pizza with cheese I am fine with it. And this is really important in relationships to respects each other and love unconditionaly. I am so grateful that you focused on the positive side of this, this is very important. Somethimes you have to let it go, just to feel better with yourself. Thank you Hannah, I love you. Greetings from Poland 💕🥑🌈
Currently struggling with this! My boyfriend of 3 years became pescatarian about 9 months ago, which I thought was a step closer to becoming vegan, but now he won't stop talking about wanting to eat meat again. Which I understand people can have cravings or lapses, but he says he "doesn't care about the animals" which is what is really bothering me. I became vegan solely for the animals, then learned about the environmental & health impacts of meat. So it's very hard for me to hear my partner say how they don't care about animals or how they are treated, when that is a basically the complete opposite of my core beliefs. I don't push him, I try not to be judgmental, but it is very hard for me to wrap my head around.
If I were in your shoes (and I know I'm not) I would get out. You're not married. Life is too short. You deserve better. You can love him from a distance and wish him well. I believe there are plenty of men who may not be vegan now, but care about animals and will go vegan if they find out the truth.
Morgana D if he doesn’t care about the suffering of other sentient beings, it means he has psychopathic traits. I would get away and quickly. You can do better.
Morgana D I know this was commented some time ago but I hope you didn’t listen to the people above. Most cravings come from something that he’s not getting enough of that is easily found in meat, maybe iron from red meat or something from another meat source. He should take into account his diet and see if he’s getting nutrients & calories. Some people don’t make the connection and he might just be saying that he doesn’t care because of the cravings or he simply hasn’t made the connection. Whatever it be, I would just make sure he’s getting what he needs (preferably) from good sources
Love this video! My boyfriend is very open minded and in the first year of me being vegan he watched some documentaries and learnt about veganism etc and his eyes were opened to an extent and he would make arguments for veganism but he didn't actually change his diet in any way. After a year of this is i sat him down and i said I'm sorry i don't want to feel this way but it is really difficult for me that you say all this stuff but don't do anything about it and i cant watch you eat animals anymore. He then went veggie for January and has been vegetarian for a year now with the aims of being vegan in the near future. I have said to him when we live together i won't have any animal products in the house and if we have children they will be vegan and he completely agrees and wants to be vegan. I think because I have been so persistent in trying to change his habits he doesn't have a real drive to do it himself and is happy to just agree with the principles as if that's enough. So even though pushing him made him veggie it would have been much better if I had let him figure it out on his own rather than me provide him with all the info. I am going to also try and let go, with family members too, it's so hard because i feel responsible for the animals death if I invite a family member or friend out to eat and that's what they order. Do you have any tips on letting all that go?
I wouldn't be able to kiss someone after they ate meat. Meat looks so disgusting to me nowadays. Maybe it's just me being weird! Also being vegetarian has changed my life for the better, I've connected more with myself through they choices I've been making. I wouldn't be able to be with someone that doesn't feel me on that level. I wouldn't get in a relationship with them in the first place because we wouldn't be compatible in that aspect. And I wouldn't want to use the same kitchen appliances and utensils. Again maybe I'm just weird. But I'm happy that you have worked things out with your husband. It's amazing that he eats vegan with you and is so understanding. Everyone is different and some people make it work like you 🙌😊
Maria Pkm I used to think like you before I met a non-vegan guy that I like. I'm in love even knowing he still eats meat (I try not to think about his eating habits tho). He ditched dairy tho. I'm not expecting him to change, but yeah, I wouldn't kiss him after he ate meat cause ... a taste-like-meat kiss ain't sexy at all!! Haha.
Thanks for making this video. When I decided to go vegan I took my partner and our children with me. It was a serious and very big part of our daily lives during transition and was met with some resistance. I love your outlook. I personally don't know if I could do the same. If my partner knew all that he knows and still chose to support it, while my love wouldn't have changed my respect and admiration for him would have. With all that I've learned I don't see how paying someone to abuse animals is ever okay. A hunter, maybe because they have to do it themselves not buy prepackaged abuse without having seen the process.
Thank you Hannah, this helped me so much since my partner is not vegan either but I am. I've always loved him unconditionally but after hearing a lot of vegans opinions on youtube I got more and more angry with the fact that he is not vegan. Your video helped to change my focus on what's important again and gave me faith in my relationship with him xx
WOW the comments here are a mess. Good for you, Hannah. I love this so much and I know we don’t know each other but I love YOU and love watching you. I always go back and watch old videos over again and today realized I must have missed this one. I’m sorry you’re receiving so many hateful comments. People being ugly and judgmental are not setting a good example or convincing anyone to go vegan, they’re just furthering the stereotype of vegans being judgmental and mean. So thank you. Your marriage is YOURS and your relationship with people around you should not depend on whether or not others agree with you 100%. If you only love people who are your clones, you’ll fall into a narcissistic bubble world where you think everything goes your way and that’s not reality! Reality is having to love people the way God loves us, unconditionally. Have a happy Tuesday, Hannah!
How do you think you will handle parenting as a vegan and non vegan? This is my current situation. I have accepted that my wife does not want to be vegan. It does still bother me, but I have stopped trying to force it. However, my wife and I adopted two children from foster care and have had them for about 4 years and we struggle to agree on food. Before the children came to us they were raised non vegan and when they came to us they were adjusting to a world of change and it wasn’t something I wanted to add to the list. Our oldest is nine now and he goes back and forth on veganism. He hates animal cruelty but has not quite developed the self control. They lived with us for 3 years before we found out we were able to adopt them. During that time they were considered children of the state and I was not in a position to alter their diet. Now that they are legal my children I struggle letting my wife feed them non vegan foods.My wife does support me and often makes vegan meals, but when it comes to raising vegan kids we struggle to agree. Do you have any advice? Sorry for the long story haha
I found you from your sister Ellen's videos. I've been watching you for a while now, and I think this is the 1st time I ever commented. I love how your so sweet, and cute, and funny, and quirky, but also Soo intelligent & articulate & well spoken. Your so right about Ellens videos, she's all artsy & Cinematic as well as entertaining & inspiring & informative. But you, seem so real & down to earth, I feel like you're talking to me like a friend. I love both you & your sisters videos. You two have many similarities, but what I enjoy are your differences.
My love for my partner is not unconditional! I'm so glad you're happy but I don't think that's a healthy aspiration for long term relationships. Of course petty and trivial conditions aren't necessary, but I think relationships should be reevaIuated and when they don't work unconditional love blinds a lot of people from removing themselves from relationships that are damaging. I guess I'm also not cut out in any way to be with a nonvegan, lol.
This is wonderful, thank you for your positivity! My partner isn’t vegan either and it was such a struggle at first, but I have also finally “let go” and it has made a world of difference for my happiness and his. It’s hard to think of how he eats meat sometimes but I know that eating meat is so ingrained in our culture that it is hard for many people to change. I think it’s only going to happen when that person is completely ready mentally and something just clicks!
A lot of what you said is very understandable. I was the other side of this coin. My boyfriend went vegan overnight 3yrs ago. I knew it was important to him and I couldnt deny any of his reasons. I went vegan too not that long after and it enriched our relationship tenfold. Im thankful for him.
Ive been vegan for 4 years and my boyfriend went vegetarian for me two years ago its not 100% perfect but its easily the sweetest thing hes done for me
This video is so needed. Thank you for creating this, Hannah. When you have compassion, you have it for all beings... all animals, human and non-human. Let's spread love wide and in every instant, including to those who don't share our values.
Thank you so much for this Hannah. My wife is so supportive of my choice to be an ethical vegan and cooks me vegan meals all the time. She’ll eat vegan food with me all the time but she’s unwilling to give up eating animals. We’ve definitely fought about this and I’ve been struggling to let it go but think I finally have and if I haven’t this video certainly did it for me. Thank you so much for making this video
I`ve never found another youtuber who talkes about this. My partner isn`t vegan but he respects my decisions and has dramatically changed his diet to eat more vegan meals anyway. I often feel like there are so many vegans who give the lifestyle choice a bad reputation and your video shows that compassion and love will always win. Thank you so much for an amazing video
My hubby is not vegetarian. I’v had to do the same as you. Accept and love. My big limits are: I don’t wanna see it or smell it, no cooking meat in the house, if you want to have meat in the fridge it must be cooked already (no raw things anywhere) and must be wrapped up and sealed.
thank you so much for bringing up this which is a reality for so many ppl!: you're so right.. having a non vegan husband and still loving and accepting them unconditionally makes you a better advocate and a person. The first year or so of me becoming vegan was .... stooorrrmmy.. i feel you girl . ! Now things are so much better and getting better all the time !
Do you cook non-vegan food for him or buy it at the grocery store? and what about raising children? sorry i'm in the same positioning and i have so many questions.
This was interesting and refreshing to watch:) unfortunatly over years of dating non vegans i prefer having a partner who at least does not eat too many animal products. My fiance eats fish a few times a week but he just eats it at work or of my family or his family makes him seafood. My family eats a lot of seafood because my mom and middle sister eat pescatarian .. I guess so does my fiance lol. As long as two people feel comfortable all is well. It is important to communicate what is prefered and listen to your partners concerns or questions. My fiance has always loved that i am vegan and he prefers a ton of vegan food now and he always asks for his birthday cakes to be vegan so i can enjoy the cake with him . I respect him and i accept that he will eat what he wants to eat sometimes . He is very respectful and i am as well .. Sometimes i do rant about veganism but he knows its not directly at him and he knows i rant about other things😅. He gets it enough where we can have great conversations about it . i wish we were the same about religion.. I am super religious( I am Pagan) he is atheist haha but thats another thing all together;)
Thank you for making this video. My fiancé isn’t vegan and it is very challenging. But then i think of all the vegan food we do eat together and the changes he has made so far and it makes me really happy!
This was such a thoughtful video. I struggle a lot with wanting to control what other people do even beyond the scope of veganism because I want to help them.. While that is a noble intention, the way I go about it suffocates people and doesn't allow them to feel like I support and love them no matter what. It's so hard to let go of control but I've found that when I do, my life becomes a lot easier. Love you Hannah!
Hannah thank you so much for talking about this subject matter. As a vegan I find aspects of the vegan community to be judgemental and closed minded. I really do agree that love is the way not fear. There are too many conversations in this world that divide us compared to uniting us. Diversity is important and love is important. Something that stood out for me was when I was asked by a very compassionate person why I do not have the same level of compassion for the insects that are killed during the harvesting of grains and vegetables. For in their culture, you have respect and gratitude for all forms of animal life, including the insects that die for a vegan meal to be made. There are also new studies that are suggesting that vegetables feel pain and have a nervous system. Above all thank you for opening a discussion about love and not fear and control
I think how you have dealt with this through your relationship is absolutely amazing and really inspiring, as I'm the only vegan in my family, it's quite hard to 'make things work' sometimes. However, prior to comparing the heartbreaking process of dairy milk to rape, I would highly encourage you to research and take into consideration what actual, human rape is. The only reason I mention this is because the diary milk process is so, so different from what rape really is, most evidently in the post-rape emotions (i.e. PTSD, depression, anxiety, suicide, etc.), and I would never want a rape survivor to feel as if their suffering is being invalidated by comparison, vegan or non-vegan. Just something to think about. Your videos are wonderful and very inspiring to me.
I think it's immature to only want to date or commit to a vegan. What if you or they wake up one day and don't want to be vegan anymore and there's more important qualities to look at then someone's diet. I've been vegan for 3 years and dating my bf for almost 2 and he respects my eating choices and even tho he's not full vegan he sees me as an influence and was starving himself before we met not eating enough and now he looks so healthy and stopped eating cheese and red meat. He also got a bike and wants to workout with me. It makes me really proud and happy to see him grow. He's 27 and it's exciting to see how we will both grow in a few more years. Plus he's a sweetie and and he's amazing in bed. Just perfect for me even though he still loves his seafood. 😂😊 I think it's just important to focus on how you two are alike instead of letting food shift things in a negative way. But everyone is different I guess some people can't handle someone who is not just like them.
I love your approach and share it. I only talk about it when my non-vegan wife and daughter ask a question or give me a comment and even then my intention is to embody my values and explain my views or actions, but not to make them feel guilty or to speak from a condescending POV. Your words are inspiring and reflect my practices of openness and true love without discrimination. Thank you!
*Hannah this video was everything! I also have a non-vegan boyfriend who I love so much and we literally just resolved a dispute that we had about this topic so this video was p e r f e c t timing. I totally agree with what you said and it's so nice to hear that someone else feels the same as me. Thanks for shining your light girl, you da best!*
I really needed this video Hannah! my partner and i have different religious and ethical beliefs (hes a meat eater and im not, hes a christian and im not religious) so its so nice to see others have the same problem of loving someone with different views/values
Love this so much! M husband is not vegan but now the vast majority of his meals are vegan. I transitioned after we had been together 11years and between our 3d and 4th babies. He and I have a wonderful relationship. Our home is plant based but he eats how he wants away from the house. That works well for us :)
I definitely needed to here this. I’ve been binge watching your videos like crazyyy! I just love who you’re as a person. You’re so you, and that’s what strongly draws me to watch and enjoy your videos, if that makes sense. Oh and not to mention you’re vegan! YAY! But yes. I’m fairly new to veganism. I’m 15 and am the only vegan in a family of 7 so it’s gets very difficult at times. But only because I make it difficult I feel. God is helping me get better and better each and every day with excepting and loving my family members for their lifestyle choices. Love you Hannah! ❤️👑✝️
I’m in the process of going vegan and although my husband does support me it upsets me sometimes that he doesn’t want to do the same and he sometimes complain that it’s “too much” but i really appreciate this video showing that it’s possible and can work. No matter the different beliefs.
Well said and wise as always. You’ve got a good head on your shoulders with eyes that see the world for more than surface level. Your compassion is contagious. Love it.
Everything you said makes perfect sense, I am vegan and my boyfriend isn't and honestly he has been always loving and helpful and understands why I live the way I do and even though he doesn't choose that life for him he supports me no matter what and at the end of the day that is what love is!
im so proud of you hannah
Ellen Fisher Ellen, don’t you think your sister deserves a man who is compassionate? Have you seen the recent video of an animal rights advocate being BEATEN to a pulp just today in North Carolina? If they’re not with us, they’re against us!
starstuff100 omg stuff it.
starstuff100 you freaking creeper!!!!!
starstuff100 nice mob mentality 👍🏻 this kind of thinking will only push people away.
starstuff100 no one who hears vegans like you want to go vegan. Be kind
My partner is not vegan and I’ve transitioned to this lifestyle while we’ve been together. It’s difficult sometimes because I feel as though I’m right or that he should be eating the same way, caring about the same things. And even though he’s not, we can still love each other and support one another, even if we don’t completely agree. He eats vegan with me, goes to vegan restaurants, and has even defended my choice to be vegan to people before. That makes me feel so loved and is all i can ask for. Some people don’t understand that, so thank you for this video Hannah!
yup. you've just described my experience perfectly.
Same! My partner says he probably won't ever go vegan (and that's fine), but he supports me, eats with me, and understands my reason(s) for being vegan.
I do think it makes us better, more compassionate advocates for veganism.
Megleighpd It must be a very strong love..my partner doesn't understand my choice as he strongly believes animals are for humans..so he can't support me for this. He is hardly accepting our difference..but we still love each other. Still wondering if the "understanding me" part is necessary to be happy in my relationship.
Amelie Langlois I’m so sorry your partner hasn’t been understanding of your choice to be vegan. My partner also believes animals are for humans, and it’s so hard when that’s the case, because there is that vital disconnect. I would say one of the most important things though is respect, that as long as he respects your choice (let’s you do you, doesn’t nag you about it, etc) that is an important place to get to. If you can make it to that point, the understanding may come or it may not, but as long as he respects you and the choices you are making for your body/the planet/the animals, or whatever reason(s) you have, things will get easier. And if you feel as though you already have that, that’s amazing! I would say that if he does say things or bother you about it, to just remind him to respect your decision. That’s something I’ve gone through with my partner when in the past he would make jokes about meat or do something that offended/hurt my feelings or seemed insensitive. Sometimes it’s on purpose and sometimes it’s not, but making sure that respect is there is super key. My partner and i still struggle sometimes, so remembering these things has helped me and him a lot, not only with veganism, but with other life decisions as well. I hope it gets easier for you❤️
Anna Kosmach Thanks Anna for your comment❤It is difficult dealing everyday about this,its been 1.5 years now and he still tries to make me eat the things he eats. Just changing "the routine"of me cooking the meals because it gets difficult for me to look at meat,more for sure to manipulate it..so respect in that term, i feel like he should cook his own thing and i cook mine..:/ but looks like a VERY hard step to do. I'm glad having talked about it i don't know any vegan and it gets hard sometimes
your last sentence ❤️❤️❤️
“how can we preach compassion as vegans when we only love people on the condition that they’re vegan, too”
Compassion and love are two different things.
You can feel compassion even for a sick or injured criminal, that doesn't mean you have to love them.
You don't even have to love animals to feel compassion for them. I've heard of vegans who aren't what you'd call die-hard animal lovers, they just understood that empathy and compassion should apply not only to humans, but to other sentient beings too.
Anni Wonder in other words: denial denial denial
Gio Tag
I feel that compassion is a form of love and is different from sympathy or even empathy. But lets not throw around definitions of words here. I didn’t come here to open a can of worms. What Hannah said just resonates with me. 💗
starstuff100 oh i love that river 🌈🦄💗
Well, not arguing about semantics, I just wanted to say that this didn't resonate with me at all.
It's one thing to have compassion for both human and non human animals, but it's a very different thing to share your life with someone with whose moral principles you disagree.
I'm not even saying it's a bad thing, or a good thing, everybody has their own situation and their own reasons. I'm just saying it has nothing to do with being a compassionate person or not.
I admire your openness and perspective. I would struggle with it too much to marry a non-vegan man. I’m fine interacting in everyday life with non-vegans. But to share my life, home and bed with someone - I just can’t put the difference in beliefs aside. To me it’s no different than something like racism. I can’t be against racism and marry a racist. I couldn’t be compassionate about that. No more than I could marry a man who loves our dogs, but thinks it’s okay to kill the cow in the pasture. I just couldn’t do it. I don’t know how I would raise my children in a divided home. Again, this is just my perspective. Glad you are in a happy, fulfilled marriage.
I think it's also fine to have your perspective. Someone having the same core belief system is really important to me, I'd have a hard time having a non vegan partner just like I would having one who was super conservative or very religious. I want my partner to view the world the same way I do. I think I could manage as long as our household was vegan though, they can eat meat on their own time but I wouldn't want it in the house.
xtinkerbellax3 - I agree. Comes down to core beliefs. I love to cook and actually enjoy grocery shopping (I know, strange). I couldn’t purchase meat, eggs and dairy for my husband and cook for him. It would just be too much of a struggle all around. I’m so eternally grateful for my vegan husband. We raise our daughter vegan. It’s like we were meant to find each other.
Well said! Agree
Riley Ramsey she’s not happy. I guarantee you eventually they will split and it will all come out. He knows better and should DO better. At some point an ethical human being has to WALK the walk. I feel sorry for her and hope she’s out of this nightmare soon. Happy you have your vegan partner!
Riley Ramsey 100% same
I’ve been vegan for two years and my partner went straight vegan 2 months after we were dating. I often question whether or not I could date someone who wasn’t vegan.
This is my problem: veganism is in direct connection with my values and my morals. For example, I feel very strongly about equality and lgbtq rights.. therefore I could never date someone who didn’t support those rights or who acted in a way that was opposite of those values.
I feel the same way about Veganism. I don’t know that I would be able to be with someone who everyday acted out of alignment with my values.
It is hard though considering that most people are not vegan. However, one has to wonder what the motivation is for a partner to remaining eat the way he/she does once they have been given all of the information and have the access and ability to change?. I think that would be my biggest hurdle with the whole thing. Luckily it’s not something I’ll ever have to deal with again.
Very interesting conversation. I enjoyed this video.
Thank you 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
The best thing is when you make a raw vegan cheesecake you don't have to share or when you have made a pita full of falafels is just for yourself....
A lot of non vegan partner still eat the vegan food though lol
xtinkerbellax3 of course, I know, my partner does. I was joking
Absolutely do share so they will know how delicious vegan food can be...it's great you do.
hahaha yas!
ahaha so true! yesterday I made vegan pie's all for myself they were delicious
if you plan on having children, do you fear that it will be confusing for them to hear from mom that eating animals is awful & cruel but to then watch dad eat those awful & cruel animal parts?
Vivi it will be awful. I’ve seen in the vegan parenting groups how it plays out. Parents split and it’s usually the mother grieving when the kids leave to dad’s since he refuses to feed the kids a vegan diet. It’s just non stop conflict and misery. Another reason it’s better to get married and procreate later in life after you know yourself more.
I think that they could work together and buy local, gentler raised and downed animal products. Farmers markets are a great place for stuff like that. Or they could raise their children on a meat-random diet and let the kids decide when they are older.
Just suggestions.
I just feel like it's such a huge moral difference. Not knowing is one thing but knowing and not changing is another.
100% agree
Completely agree. But I admire this woman for being able to live like this
Maya Papaya agreed
Perhaps I can add my perspective as a non-vegan who is aware of the animal farming issues and considers herself (as we all do) a 'good' and 'moral' person. Leaving aside the fact that humans experience cognitive biases like this, between self beliefs and actions, all the time (Belief: I am a good person/good employee. Action: I waste company time surfing the internet every day.) and (often unconsciously) justify them just as often because the brain hates these cognitive dissonances ('The company doesn't pay me enough, so I won't feel guilty surfing the internet) -- the fact is that most of us love convenience and comfort and are weak-minded. I eat 90% vegan, but do regularly eat (small) amounts of chicken, seafood, and eggs. I do try to buy local, small-farm products (I live in Europe so it is easier), but I am aware that my cravings for animal products cause animal suffering. And yet I do not, and likely will never, choose to be 100% vegan. Why? Because I am weak mentally in that way. I give in to those cravings, and don't try to fight them. So the question that perhaps can help vegans not resent their non-vegan loved ones is: would you resent them if the weakness was different? Say, if they were obese and yet could not stop eating sweets. Or if they were aware that their clothes are produced in sweatshops but kept on buying those brands (perhaps many of us fall in this category). Would you still love them? If yes, then perhaps you can see how you can still love and accept a non-vegan in spite of their 'weakness'. Further, I am sure every vegan person, by virtue of being human, also has various 'moral failings' / weaknesses (including some that directly or indirectly hurt other beings) they are aware of but cannot overcome/change, yet their partner loves them the same nonetheless. This can also help build understanding and acceptance for your non-vegan partner (or friends). I hope this helps.
I do get her arguments and agree largely that I don't love my (vegetarian) boyfriend any less because he still consumes dairy and eggs, but at the same time our relationship is very young, he's said that if we moved together, he would eat vegan at home, and he respects me fully -- I honestly don't know if I would feel the same way about it if we were married or together for, who knows, 10 years. And I had told him before we got together that I wouldn't date a meateater, and that point still stands. I do think that's perhaps a little judgemental of me but as you've said, it's imo a huge moral difference. (And to be fair, I wouldn't date someone who's very religious either or someone who has very different political views. It's just a part of me and I don't think I need to silence myself either for my partner. He shouldn't change for me; but neither will I shrink myself for him.)
I️ love this, Ive been struggling with this with my boyfriend of 6 years. From now on I’m going to try to just love him instead of change him!
Also, I️ have been watching you forever and I️ just want you to know that you are beyond just one of the most creative you tubers on TH-cam but you are such a light and huge inspiration. You are amazing
These abusive women pushing their views on their men, imagine what would be if they did the same to you!
This video is perfect! My husband is not a vegan either and we went through the same thing as you spoke of here. But everything changed when I stopped pushing my views on him. He eats a lot of vegan meals and treats with me and we go to vegan restaurants, he loves it! People wonder how we do it and its really setting your judgements aside and allowing others to make their own choices with whatever path their on. My husband is probably the most understanding and kind about my choices.
I really enjoy your videos! Xo
Randi Rose he’s not the most understanding. Another vegan would be
I wouldn't be happy with an actor sharing my bed knowing their heart is not there
These abusive women pushing their views on their men, imagine what would be if they did the same to you!
This is what I’ve been going through in my marriage this year especially since my daughter just started eating (she’s 8 mons). My husband and I married after 5 years together and a year later I decided to be vegetarian/pescatarian and first kept it a secret from him for 4 months. My reason being the environment. I generally didn’t eat a lot of meat. After having a baby together, it became an ethical issue as I didn’t want to partake in taking a mother’s milk away from their baby. It has been a struggle for sure. I thought about getting counseling. We both agree we will let our daughter decide what she wants to eat and a Whole Foods plant based diet is best for her right now. I love how vegans should be compassionate to both animals and humans and I’m still trying to be respectful of his choices and subtlety provide facts about the meat industry or nutrition. I love to know that I’m not alone.
Thank you for making this. My husband is also non-vegan but eats plant-based because he cares about the environment. That's totally fine with me now! I still lecture him on nutrition sometimes, but I agree I think it's easier to talk to people and help them in this way. It's much easier to encourage people to eat less animal products.
I should be sleeping as it’s 2:00am here in Australia, but Hannah’s more important so...
Katherine Louise omg same here, can't stay up late otherwise I'll check before bed lol
haha same!
I feel you, it happens to me a lot
A year later and I'm watching this at 2am as well lol
It’s nice that you have gotten over the fact that he refused to be vegan with you. I could never be in a relationship with a non vegans this point in my journey, it may sound harsh to some I guess but it’s just a line for me. (Just like I could never be with someone who is a homophobe or like an super conservative person.) I’m just so grateful for my partner he went vegetarian then vegan along with me three years ago now. I can accept everyone else in my life not being vegan like my family and friends but my partner is not one of them. That’s just me though if my partner had been less open to the idea I probably wouldn’t have had he strength to stick with this lifestyle, I need a support person.
Angel Wilcox sounds like my exact same story! It’s a blessing to have a partner make the connection and seek to live a life that reduces cruelty as much as possible! I’ve been pretty harsh on here admittedly, but my intentions are good - I want people to seek the best possible relationships they can for themselves and seek to stay aligned with their value systems. After all, having a value system is really what makes us human.. and once you know the truth and you see the suffering, you are forever changed.. I think ultimately conflicts are going to arise otherwise. Especially when children are involved.
my husband and I met when we weren't vegan. I watched a documentary and wanted to go vegetarian. We watched Dominion together so I could show him why (was the first time I watched it) and instead if vegetarian we went vegan at the same time :') He is a very nice person and I'm happy we had no problems, since he was just as compassionate as me when it comes to sentient beings
last sentence: "how can we preach compassion as vegans iv we only love people on the condition that they are vegan to?"
my opinion: I want to spend my life with a good person, and good persons decides to do good things. Beeing okay with murder and torture of animals for my own taste preferences is not a thing that good people do.
Am i judgemental? No i am not, because i believe that most perople are just not educated enought on the topic. If My mom and my brothers would know what i know abought the Ethical, enviromental and health side of veganism they would change theyre behaviour.
I try not to be preachy, but if the situation is right i try educate them. (its very hard for me to wait for them)
My boyfriend watched earthlings with me. (i have not seen the movie fully till today because i just cryed so badly that i have to stop)
He...just dont care. He has seen the teribble things that happend to the animals.
And he know how delicious and convinient vegan food . (because i have nioce cooking skills and we were out eating vegan very often)
I was so disappointet because he...just dont care. He is now my ex. I just cant life with such a person as my soulmate.
veronika veitz you are awesome. ❤️ you will be rewarded for sticking true to your morals. You will know happiness and peace. There’s plenty of vegan guys out there and more every day! 👍
What are his reasons for not being vegan? Just wondering... :) lots of love from switzerland
skiaddict7 because he loves how animal products taste
Because in some countries is very expensive. I truly hate how some vegans are so full of themselves. Animal brutality is one of the thousands of world problems out there. You probably use a cell phone that most likely have been crafted by an underfed sirian child. And there are a lot of examples like that. The hypocrisy is unbelievable.
@@popodopulus3826 no you justify not being vegan with the fact that that we are also flawed... So I am guessing you don't won a cell phone then? Guess what we are people also. In our days no one lives without a cell phone unless you are living I don't know where... You can live without meat. Most of us can at least.
@@anacatarina117 Is easier for women because men need animal protein in larger amounts. If you are going to preach about something so passionately I suggest you also become communist. Or at least the least capitalist possible. I know plenty of people who doesn't own a phone. Did you know that for the salad that you eat millions of bugs have been murdered because of pesticide? Don't you care about that? Also the pesticide harms the environment.
My husband a I have been together for 8 years but married for 1. During the first year of marriage I turned vegan (for animals, health, and planet) and haven't looked back. But, my husband is not and my oldest son is not. My youngest (2) is being raised vegan. My oldest (5) understands what veganism is. There are certain things he picks and chooses to eat. Since he was not raised from the start vegan, I have eased him into understanding why mommy and brother don't eat the same way. During all this it's been an ongoing battle on how we raise our children and how I care for our family being vegan. I definitely needed to hear this. Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart for sharing this video with the world. I'm sure a lot of people can relate to this and I'm sure it's definitely brought peace and contentment to hearts and minds. I know for my self it has. Lots of love ❤️
I agree with what you said but I also heard a life coach talk about unconditional love to be bogus because it doesn't make any sense. You can't be loving someone or something no matter what they do or what happens. Maybe conditional love is the more realistic approach to love.
I'm binging videos because I discovered your channel a few days ago and I love your personality. I love this video so much. I have been with my boyfriend for over 8 years, I went vegetarian a few years ago and now I'm plant based and moving towards being more ethically vegan...but he still eats meat and I'm ok with that. I never want to be pushy or overbearing and I've noticed that he does eat more vegetables now than ever before (he's extremely picky) I also appreciate when we're trying to find places to eat out of town and he's like "oh look they have vegan/vegetarian options". I love that even though he doesn't eat this way that he is always thinking of me in that way. It's so sweet honestly. Sometimes it's the little things.
Hannah, oh my god, thank you for this!! I was really needing a video like this about a year ago because that's when my partner and I were having issues between us regarding our lifestyles and ethical beliefs. We're doing a lot better now, but seeing that others go through/have gone through this and there's light at the end of the tunnel is so reassuring. I feel so much love and acceptance for my partner and she for me. I love how supportive she is of my lifestyle and beliefs, even though she doesn't feel them herself. And I respect where she's at as well. I was in her shoes once and I know how hard it is to let go of social conditioning and lifelong habits. She's a beautiful soul and does care for animals a great deal. I've seen her in action helping both children and animals who have gotten lost or been separated from their guardians. She shows care and kindness towards every living being and doesn't tolerate abuse. She's usually the one to wrangle bugs (and even lizards!) when they show up in our home and helps them return to their natural habitat. I wouldn't trade her for any vegan in the world and wouldn't want her to change for me. I support her no matter which path she chooses. I'm just grateful she's chosen to go on this journey through life with me.
My boyfriend became more open when we started getting serious about life long commitment, and I expressed how I was worried about how we’d live, particularly with children, if we had such opposing morals. When I put it in a way that it would make me more comfortable with our relationship that we were open, he was immediately more willing to hear about it. He watched What The Health on his own, and started Earthlings with me before i had a melt down about the contents. He at least eats vegetarian when we’re together, and when we move in together in about a year, he plans to go fully vegetarian, and transition to veganism from there. He’s truly amazing, and cares about me so much that when he truly realised how important it is to me, he tried to see it too.
Thank you so much for this Hannah! I have on occasion felt judged by fellow vegans for happily living in a long-term relationship with my omnivore boyfriend. But when you love someone, you love them through it - you don't expect perfection and you don't try to change them! I have lots of faults and bad habits - I buy new clothes, I sometimes use plastic, and I have been known to toss a peanut butter jar because they are impossible to clean out before recycling. But I try. And my boyfriend eats meat and dairy, but he's cut back a lot since we've lived together! All you can do in a relationship is support each other, love each other, celebrate successes, and forgive shortcomings. No two journeys are alike, and no one person is perfect 😊
PREACH IT GIRL!! I can definitely relate. Overcoming the initial preachy stage of veganism takes time and lots of paying attention, but once you humble out, life feels lighter.
I really needed to hear this!!! But, first omgosh!!! How did I not know you had a TH-cam channel!!! I love your sisters videos. And now I’m already in love with you too!! My story is very similar to yours!! I went plant based first then the veils were lifted!! It has been almost a year that I have went vegan. My husband of 12 years has no desire to be vegan. I’ve felt like a bad vegan because he did not join me on this journey. I love my husband so much!! And your last statement, “How can we preach compassion if we only love people on the condition that their vegan too.” Really hit close to home for me!!! Thank you for sharing this with others!! On a plus note one of my three children went vegan with me and so did my parents!!! One voice can make a difference!!! Can’t wait to watch many more of your videos!!! 😍
This video made me feel so good about my relationship. I have a non-vegan boyfriend and I understood that being vegan is not a fast decision to make. Everyone has their own time to process this whole world that veganism can be. I'm vegan for a year now, and I'm still in that process, learning and feeling different about all the living things. And, gosh, it can be hard to fight against the common sense, we all know that. Being non-judgemental can be way more "usefull" for the veganism. Making food for my all family, and not just for me, made them learn that it can be easy to be vegan, but it just happened because I had eaten with non-vegan peaple a lot of times.
Love this!!! I’m married & my husband is not vegan and we are still learning the ins and outs of how this works because I transitioned after our marriage. One thing that has never changed is our love for each other. Awesome message!! ❤️
Thank you for this video! I love watching all of your videos and everything you stand for! You and your sister are my role models!! I also have a non vegan partner but we are raising our daughter (5) vegan. He completely understands the health aspect of it, and also eats mostly vegan at home. At first, it was difficult to teach this to a child, but once I took the compassionate route, it came a little easier. I tell her we love others even though we may not like what they do. And she amazes me for a 5 year old! She often questions him and others why they aren't vegan and you can see they begin to question themselves. It's nice to know there are others out there like this (as much as I'd love it if my partner went vegan!!). Just, thanks for all you do!
Thank you so much for this Hannah ! I really needed to hear this. Specially the last sentence. Please continue to make great content like this, I love how real you are.
WOW, Hannah... love this. I also have a partner who isn’t vegan and what you are describing here is something I have been working toward in my mind slowly, but I haven’t yet put the words to it and I still struggle a bit. But THIS is so so important and it helps so much to hear out loud because now I can acknowledge that growing thing in the back of my mind. Your love for your partner is so clear in this video and it’s so inspiring. Thank you.
All these comments 'I could NEVER be with a partner who's not vegan' all single, talking about their future hypothetical 'perfect' partners who they'll probs never find. Guess I should just divorce my husband of 9 years, cuz I decided to be vegan 2 years ago. Get off your friggen high horses. The real world doesn't work that way.
Samantha Shearing YOU get out of your high horse! If you could be with someone that is not vegan good for you! If I can't, that's doesn't mean I'm less good than you!! To each it's preferences!
Hanna S. My comment is in reply to all the arseholes judging this woman and her relationship. If you read my comment and think that's me saying specifically that you are 'less good' then me, that's in your own mind. Try not to take things so personally.
Totally agree. These people haven’t felt true love if they say they couldn’t see past what a person eats.
It's not just what a person eats though. It's a very complex lifestyle full of good intention. It would be like finding out your partner is a serial killer, because essentially, they are (or maybe consistently hires hitmen, if ya wanna be literal). And you're just supposed to accept them, love them, sleep next to them after finding all this out?
Madison Taylor
Aprox 2% of the world's population is vegan.
Comparing serial killers to people who are eating what 98% of the population eat? So ridiculous.
So you were a serial killer and then one day you woke up and you're perfect now because you're vegan? But before that day, you were a horrible person who didn't deserve love?
So you're an omnivore for 27 years, you're with your partner for 7 of those, and then you decide to go vegan and because he continues to live as you BOTH previously were, as most people on this planet do, you expect people to end their relationship? Because the vegan is now perfect and the meat eater is suddenly evil.
Only vegans should find love and breed... well I suppose that's not a bad thing, the planet would be better off without all us humans and your plan is a sure-fire way to end humanity.
Until then, I'll stay in my loving marriage and I'll be proud of all the positive changes I've bought to our lives through my veganism.
I never thought about it this way but you are absolutely right! I will keep that in mind when hanging out with non-vegans in the future and try to be more understanding.
For years I ate a plant based diet and just recently (since having my daughter) have switched to being an ethical vegan. It has made me rethink alot of my life, especially relationships. For some reason alot of people I watched on TH-cam or read about seemed to be preaching about being vegan as an absolute truth and the only way to live. As much as I did agree with alot of what they said something just didn't sit right. I have a non vegan partner as well (who 100% supports my lifestyle and the fact that I want to raise my daughter as a vegan) and I found myself thinking "how can I be with someone who isn't a vegan?!". This video helped me SO much. The last line in your video resonated with me at such a deep level and really helped me settle this internal battle in my head! Thank you!!!
I am 100% resonating with this video!! The person I love is Non Vegan. And if he went Vegan tomorrow, I wouldn't love him any more than I do right now. Compassion is key. That includes compassion for humans. Thank you Hannah!💜💜💜
HANNAH. THANKYOU SO MUCH FOR MAKING THIS VIDEO. I feel like you made this just for me and my partner
rebekahsjs give him some time to change but if his heart isn’t moved after a while it means he’s heartless. Then you’ll know it’s time to leave
starstuff100 wow, I'm impressed with how magically you completely missed the point of this whole video.
I’ve never felt more at ease about this because I’ve been having this issue lately and I’ve been so pushy about it and it’s only been making me mad and frustrated and really hasn’t been changing anything. Thank You for making me feel better about this, for helping me realize that maybe Vegan and Non Vegan relationships can work with a change in myself
Great video! I'm vegan for more than 2,5 years now and I'm in a relationship for a little more than 2 years with my boyfriend. So I was 16 when I met him and he was 17. Which means that the both of us changed a lot during that time, and that's a huge struggle for us. we don't have a lot of same interests anymore and our lifestyles are very different. But we still love each other and don't know whether we should accept that we changed to much or whether we should keep trying to make it work.
Being vegan isn't even the biggest "problem" although it is one if the things where we are way too different. As he knows about everything but doesn't want so see it. And I became way more passionate about it than I was in the beginning.I also love cooking so much and he doesn't like that, Same as all the other hobbies that I have. While I don't like his hobbies besides watching the same films and series, but that just isn't enough...
This is the second time I have watched this and I cried again. My husband and I got married two and a half years ago as strongly believing Christians. I became an atheist 6 months later and we have had a very hard 2 years (the fact that I’m closeted from most people in that doesn’t help). We also have the fact that I am 90% vegan and he is not, but the religion thing is why this video speaks to my heart so dearly. Thank you for all you do, but especially thank you for this. You give me hope for the future.
Thank you for sharing ♥️
I LOVE THIS VIDEO. I LOVE THE MESSAGE BEHIND IT. I LOVE THAT YOU PUT IT OUT INTO THE WORLD SO OTHERS CAN HEAR IT!!!! THIS IS ULTIMATELY WHAT PEOPLE NEED TO UNDERSTAND. It does not matter what people do with their life. Focus on you. Don't focus on what you don't agree with.
Good on you Hannah. My boyfriend is vegan and I'm not. I've never felt judged by him, and I honestly think that is the reason why 1) we're still together after almost 7 years, and 2) I'm (without even noticing it) for some reason slowly almost have become vegan myself. I know a lot of people can't fathom how you could know about the horrors that accompanies the making of animal products and still not be vegan, and I really don't even myself have a logical explanation. I guess I just haven't "clicked" yet. I guess my point is that in my head, when it comes down to it all, what would benefit the animals the most is to reduce (in the end eliminate) the use of animal products, and apparently being loving and accepting of others is a very powerful way of doing that. I truly believe that your voice is coming from a very powerful place being married to a non-vegan, and are very happy that you're raising your voice as I could imagine it could be a bit of a "taboo" in the vegan community.
Best regards
After a year of living with my boyfriend, he decided to go vegan. He is now 6 months vegan and always tells me why I didn’t make him before. My response is always, “I can’t make you do anything, is something you had to decide on your own”. He loves being vegan and talks about it all the time. It honestly made our relationship 10x greater 💕
Really good video! My husband and I have very fundamentally different food taste profiles. Our 16 year old son is with me and our 15 year old daughter is with my husband. Cooking for our family leaves me frustrated, confused and sad. This video is a great way to reframe those feelings of mine, instead of constantly wondering why my husband and daughter won't change to be more like me and my son. Thanks so much for this!
I really don’t think I’d ever be able to date, let alone marry someone whose not vegan so kudos to you... I think it’s also crazy that he knows the truth yet doesn’t change. Kind of odd but that’s okay, to each his own
Layla Vicari Music that’s also how I feel
Korina Trudel Her transition was actually from plant-based to ethical vegan. So, her husband was familiar with the diet prior to marriage, but not the ethical angle.
Well I think it is looking at the person for who they are and not what you want out of them.. I am a Christian who is deep in my faith.. my partner is Atheist.. We Find a happy medium.. He lets me openly pray and bow his head at meals when I pray.. I dont force him to go to church or read.. In the End I am very happy.. Yes I dont understand why he dont Beleive in Jesus and Yes he dont understand why I do.. People who you generally get along with and Love deeply is very very rare for most people.. Sure Finding a vegan might be great but what if your soulmate is not a vegan???
I totally agree, I could NEVER be married to someone who is not vegan tho he knows the truth :(
Hedvig Bogdan you sound so terrible
This is so inspiring, a while ago I left my previous relationship where my ex was not vegan and I told myself that I would never date someone again that wasn’t vegan but you can’t help who you fall in love with. My girlfriend now is not vegan at all but she totally supports me and loves eating vegan food if I make it for her. Thank you so much for giving this subject a much more positive light.
Thank you soooo much for this video. I've been married 4 months to a non-vegan and vegan for 1 year. It has been very difficult for us and has put a lot of strain on our relationship. But after watching your previous video on letting go, I finally did do just that. And it's made a huge difference. Letting go of the responsibility of turning everyone I love vegan has brought a lot of peace to my life. I will always fight for the voiceless, but, like you said, compassion starts at home. I feel so much more confident in my decision after watching your video. Thanks Hannah!!
I personally could not be with someone who doesn't have any interest in going vegetarian/vegan.
Ellen that's always okay, too! ♡
Thank you so much for sharing this Hannah! That core of unconditional love and compassion is so important for relationships to flourish and sustain over time. I've struggled with dismay around my parents and partner being meat eaters, and have tried in the past to guilt or inform them into become vegan or at least vegetarian. This never gets a good response. They just feel harassed and it shuts down communication. We don't give up on our own ethics and boundaries by showing love and compassion to those who don't share our views. It's simply a better way to interact with everyone in our lives. It takes practice, and I'm far from perfect! This is such an important reminder to those who differ in any type of belief. We need more loving and compassionate discussions and debates in the world right now.
I was pushy and judgemental towards my husband. As soon as I stopped trying to control his situation I just accepted it...well he is now a full-blown vegan. We can't show people the truth they need it to be revealed to them in their own unique way.
This is so Spiritual this is how most Christians feel but we don’t force people we lead/show by example. Great vid!
I have a genuine question and would really love to know what you think about this : My sister has 6 lovely hens she has as pets. ( They are fed and kept better than some humans I know) Either way they are completely loved and roam free every day and go into their amazing coop at night on their own to protect them from the creatures that lurk in the night; then let back out in the morning. Now I don't see a problem eating their eggs because they lay them regardless so they are not being harmed or forced to do so. They are also not fertile because there are no roosters present. I was wondering what your thoughts are on supporting local "happy" farms (similar to my sisters situation where they have happy pets that also produce things naturally) or friends that have a situation like this where there is no stoping the lay of the egg or even local honey farmers that are creating homes for these honey bees that need it because they are endangered. Purely curious on a vegans or multiple vegans views on this. I do not eat meat or other dairy products ( I don't even eat my sisters chickens eggs) But am curious on if someone sees an issue with it.
Sorry for the long post. Love you Hannah!!
The only thing I would say is buying the hens in the first place to keep as pets could be supporting an unethical farming practice, apart from that I personally would have no issue with it. I have a friend who rescues ex battery hens who lay on average once a day. I have no problem eating those eggs as they are from happy hens who have been rescued from awful conditions. Honey again confuses me, but I feel like supporting honey farmers has more overall benefits for the environment and animals (increased biodiversity etc.) than downsides.
Lizzy Weber thank you for responding! She also did lots of research on where her babies were coming from and from what she could find it all was all rescue but again i did not do the research myself. That is a great point though. Rescues are always the way to go 😍 thank you again I’ve been so curious about this topic lately ❤️
Chickens collect their eggs and when you steal them they get stressed out and produce more wich hurts their bodies
I don’t see an issue in the eggs and honey in that sense! :)
Hannah you really hit the spot with this video and I can totally relate to your message on a personal level. I went vegan during my previous relationship and was super pushy about it to my partner. Whenever he ate animal products I would roll my eyes or lecture him about where they came from. This resulted in him eating even more animal products, because he wanted to annoy me just as much as my pushiness annoyed him.
In my current relationship I never made a big deal out of veganism to begin with. However, when my boyfriend had or has any questions I'm more than happy to answer them and he knows that I am very passionate about veganism. So he supports me, and he eats vegan with me all the time and even agreed to watch some documentaries on the topic with me. He also accepts that my apartment is a vegan place and is happy to, for example, have his coffee with oat milk in the morning instead of cows milk and appreciated whenever I cook a vegan meal for the two of us.
Letting go is so so important and has made me grow as a person as well - knowing that people are more than their lifestyle choices and that we shouldn't love them any more or less because of the choices they make.
I think this is a pretty common thing and so far your the only TH-cam (I’ve seen at least) talk about this subject. Being as this subject directly affects my life it was nice knowing that you got through it. It’s very difficult seeing everyone around you.. except yourself.. not only contributing to the slaughter of beautiful animals, the destruction of our planet but ultimately the destruction of themselves. I’ve been vegan for one year now, lots of mess ups and not knowing what I’m doing lol but videos like these help. I don’t feel so alone. My husband accepts it but just can’t get on board with it. He even still constantly asks me if I want meat, or dairy and I have to be like no thank you 😟 he has tried to eat more plant based options so that’s a plus. Thanks for your always amazing uploads Hannah 🖤🖤
My husband is not a vegan... but he is open minded enough to eat what ever I cook... He just has huge portions of my vegan food... Sometimes I'll buy him a roastiserie chicken and just add chicken to his plate. When we go out, he eats what ever he likes. He is amazing and never criticizes what I cook! I honestly cannot complain!
I wrote a long blog post about this topic once and I just want to share a different perspective. My partner wasn't vegan when I met him, but quickly went vegan after we met because of what I taught him. If he hadn't after years and years, I don't think we would still be together. And this has nothing to do with love, it's about long-term living. Long term I want to be with someone who respects animals and respects themselves as much as I do. I should want that for myself. For long term compatibility, you should also choose someone who has similar goals as you, wants the same amount of children, etc. Too many people separate because no one should have to compromise on their major life choices. In the end, someone always ends up compromising if you're not on the same page. There are other people in the world who would align with you on those things. And of course, I understand "soulmates" and such but are they really your soulmate if they're okay with animals being killed in our industries? I just feel that we, as vegans, should expect more from our partners in life. We deserve someone who feels the same way.
It would be delightful if your hubby makes the commitment too!! Especially for the sake of your children to come.
Its very hard to bring children up in a divided home ... many marriages fail due to husband and wife being in different religions, like a Jew and Christian or Muslim and Christian .... so also veganism and carnism there is a chasm between you ... its invisible but its there, no matter how hard you try and ignore it ....
All I can say is stick to your veganism ... your marriage is still young, time will tell if your husband has the same compassion as you, because the way I see it right now is - YOU are the loving and compassionate and loyal one ... the glue that holds your marriage together .... but the love, compassion and glue should be equal, otherwise youre in an unequal yoke.
Still .... what ever you do and decide .... its your life and you must live it and my hope is that your husband will see the light so that he can also be enlightened like you are!!
The people I love the most -my parents, friends, and boyfriend- are not vegan, and it was (sometimes still is) hard for me, because I'm certain that this is the healthiest and most sustainable lifestyle. But I try my best to spread knowladge, and everytime I have the opportunity I make them delicious vegan meals to show how awesome veganism is. :) And I'm extremely grateful for their support, my mother is the best, she cooks vegan dishes for me every singe day
Omg! Thank you so much for this video. This is me and my husband. He’s utterly respectful but doesn’t agree with veganism for its ethical reasons. He’ll eat vegan meals but doesn’t want to ONLY eat vegan. Plus, i became vegan a few years after my kids were born so they’ve grown accustomed to their animal products too.
I never tried to force my husband to be vegan but I definitely tried to educate him and he won’t listen. So yes love and acceptance. Once I was able to make this shift, our relationship got better. But honestly, it’s this way with religion and politics for us too lol I guess you can say it’s an “odd” match but our love keeps us going. I’d love to hear of some vegan meal ideas to keep my husband interested! ❤️
Well said!.. Compassion and love over judgement and hate!.. My husband didn't go vegan went I made that lifestyle choice.. Two years after he decided to eliminate all meats and milk (still eats cheese and eggs sometimes).. Was his choice and I didn't push at all. He loves eating plants and nuts, legumes, soy.. he doesn't miss meat at all.. so proud of him. It will be 4 years for him in July...
Hey Hannah! I hope this comment doesn't come out rude, I'm just confused and curious so I thought I'd join in on the conversation. I totally agree in compassion and not pestering your partner to go vegan but I'm just wondering what his reasoning for not going vegan is? I went vegan when my fiancé and I had been dating for about 8 years. He wasn't sure about it. I was pushy (but not judgemental) for a couple of months when I really started getting into it and then when I stopped pushing and just started sharing information with him he eventually came to it in his own time. Looking back, it happened very quickly and it wasn't ever a point of contention between us. This is where my comment can be misinterpreted, hopefully I can word this right; I'm just wondering why it's taking so long for your husband to go vegan? I don't mean that he SHOULD just because it's "the only way" but I just wonder if you are such an activist and he is around you all the time, how has it taken this long for him to hear all the wonderful things being vegan can do for the world? I mean, I personally believe the future is vegan and would love for everyone to go vegan on the spot. I don't judge people and I have never thought down of anyone who wasn't vegan. I've never had a problem with other people when they aren't seeing my side of the story but I stay armed with knowledge so if the subject ever comes up I know that I am speaking intelligently and not just slinging my biased opinions around. Again, I hope my words don't come across as rude, I'm by no means judging or trying to talk down to you or your husband, I'm just curious as to where the disconnect is. Sending positive thoughts your way
Stephanie Eva Probably because meat is delicious and not everyone wants to give up things they enjoy. Not everyone cares how certain things end up on the shelves
I have asked this question about my partner ever since I went vegan. The food in our home is vegan, and he usually enjoys all vegan restaurants we go out to, however when we go out to eat or have dinner with the family he almost always chooses the meat option. Whenever we have conversations about diet, he usually agrees or comes to an understanding of why veganism is the optimal choice for health. But I am the only vegan in his life, our friends and family all eat a traditional American diet and we live in a small town where veganism isn't a trend. I feel that my partner is still on the fence about eating plant-based is because meat eating is SO heavily influenced. His brother also owns a small livestock farm, so when they're together he hears about the hoopla of grass-fed beef and pork, cage free/hormone free chickens and turkeys, raw milk, and how sustainable small organic farms are (all which he knows I completely disagree with). Some people are just more influenced by who believes what around them. Some people have a hard time breaking away with the beliefs of a standard American diet. Some people just take a lot longer to make the connection to veganism. So people just flat out don't want to change and enjoy their meat-eating habits. Whatever the reason. . I still hope that one day he will make the commitment to be plant-based. If not, that's okay! I'm really happy and lucky my partner supports me and enjoys the food that I eat. Best!
Beauty By Syddd from the tone of your comment I'm guessing you're saying it's fine not to be vegan and we shouldn't care as it only affects ourselves. This sort of selfish attitude is so sad because you don't have to bother even thinking about what it would be like to experience the actual horror and terror and suffering every single animal you eat has to feel. Apathy has been the cause of all great injustices in the world and it's not something that should be encouraged
Stephanie Eva my partner is not vegan and I am, and when we’ve spoken about it he agrees that it’s the healthiest way to eat and that it makes him feel his best. But he also does not think that humans and animals are fundamentally the same (basically don’t need similar rights) and he also doesn’t agree that we aren’t supposed to eat meat. He also has said that one of his biggest issues is that he doesn’t want his freedom in eating whatever he wants to be taken away. Which I know sort of sounds silly because to me meat isn’t even food, but where I feel as though veganism is abundance and has opened me up to so many cuisines and flavors, he feels restricted. These are just his reasons, and I wanted to share. Also, to others who may read this thread, please understand that no one is perfect and I am just sharing my experience. My partner and I talk about veganism a lot with each other, but I don’t force anything because, at least with our relationship, that has never been productive, just as Hannah describes in the video. If he ever does come around to veganism, I want it to be because of his own choice, desires, and beliefs, not because he feels forced and judged
Rube not trying to be an ass but when reading text the one reading it puts the tone. I didn't get that at all from her comment. 1st) Most people that grew up eating meat think it's delicious. 2nd) it's hard to give up something you love regardless of how it effects yourself and or others especially if everyone else around you is doing it. Please don't judge. That's not how you help the animals and or our environment.
Thank you so much for this video, Hannah. It’s extremely helpful 🥰. The thing that’s the hardest for me trying to live a vegan lifestyle is not buying items made from animal’s skin. Before we chose this lifestyle, we already had some large items made from leather(sofas, seats in cars, steering wheels in cars.....), and it make me feel like a hypocrite. They’re large, expensive items I can’t financially justify getting rid of right now.
thank you for this video, hannah! my partner isn’t vegan either and at first i felt uneasy about it... they’d make the usual jokes and eat meat in front of me which always upset me but i tried to not say anything because i didn’t want to be one of “those” vegans. my vegan friends would give me crap for dating a non-vegan and that really bothered me. i tried to stay as respectful and grounded through all this so they could explore veganism on their own, not because of their partner.
now a year later we both have grown so much! they eat nearly 100% meat free and i feel more relaxed about the jokes from all non-vegans. i really think if you life a positive, healthy and compassionate life the people who care about you will see it and will respect you for it. (and possibly emulate it!) my partner said one of the coolest things about me is that i’m vegan, which they definitely wouldn’t have said a year ago. growth is beautiful!
This is really inspiring to me. For a long time, I pressured my husband into going vegan. I feel that my nagging only pushed him farther away from wanting to try. When we got together, he was a non vegan who ate meat every day. I remember being angry that I was spending my dollar on his groceries. However, when I finally realized that I loved this man regardless of what he chose to eat, I realized it was important for him to make his own decisions and connections. He is now a vegetarian for over a year and I am so proud of him. He is proud of himself too. He is not ready to go vegan and has expressed this to me, instead of being hard on him about eating eggs and dairy, I tell him how proud I am of him for getting the meat out if his diet. Together we have a healthy balance and because I do the cooking he is always eating beautiful vegan meals. I have let go of the nagging and let him be himself. Although I hope that one day he will make the connection, I no longer believe it is my ‘duty’ to change him. He is his osn person. We are now expecting a child and he is extremely encouraging to me about raising him vegan. Loving unconditionally is a beautiful way to love!
Beautifulminds it sounds like your husband is making real progress. Hannah’s husband however is not and never intends to. He uses his meat eating as a way to emotionally dominate her. Notice how he’s not in these vids explaining himself? He’s a coward
starstuff100 I dont see Hannah as dominated in any sense, however I do not know her personally. She comes across as a strong valued woman with goals and is making a great impression in this world. I believe in compassion for all, even if I dont agree with what others are doing, I still have compassion because one day long ago, I was just as blind. Hannah has chose to love her husband through and through, there may be many reasons behind him not being on this video explaining himself, maybe he was not asked to be involved in this video? Im not sure. All I know, for myself, is that I am proud of where my life stands having compassion for all and I am truly proud of myself for allowing my husband to come into his realizations on his own terms. Again, I dont agree with people who eat meat dairy and eggs, but it is obvious that Hannah loves her hubby for reasons other than his dietary choices. We are all at different stages, maybe one day he will see, and maybe he wont, but I will continue to have compassion for her and him and their relationship and I hold respect in my heart for her regardless of who she loves.
I can't have a non-vegan partner, it's a compromise and I am not ready to make that. How can you let go your partner and still be passionate vegan? How does it work? Isn't it the same thing with if my son rapes someone, I will forgive him but if someone else does that, I want that person to get jail. Very confusing.
one sec how can you accept someone who supports cruelty? Isn't there a basic flaw in what you are trying to convince yourself so that you can be happy?
Love, beliefs, religion makes us blind and maybe you are blind in this unconditional love and I personaly respect that but it's not a valid argument
don't consider my comment as rude in any way, I am just lost in your argument and I hope if your husband really loves you, he will understand how much you love animals, and he stops murdering them.
Sagar Tandon he loves being obstinate. He won’t go vegan because he likes having control over her. It’s so obvious. She should get out now
This is awesome and really encouraging! I am in a slow transition to veganism (over the last 3 years) been over a year vegetarian and on and off "vegan" due to the ethical reasons. My husband is not and I still feel pressure to make him meat for dinners and with our first child due any day, the talk of how our kids will eat has put some strain on the relationship. I love him to the moon and back and just wish he was open to the idea of having some meatless dinners/lunches. Even with all the protein break downs and delicious meals I have recreated, there is no change. This helped me step back and reevaluate and appreciate all the other things we have going for us!
Audrey Clark you’re a good example of what can happen in these “mixed” marriages. Kid isn’t even here yet and you’re already arguing! You’re the one that’s going to push the kid out. Tell your husband that YOU will then decide how the kid eats! And if he doesn’t like it bring his ass to this comment section and I’ll be happy to lay into him 😁
We don't sit around arguing all the time about it, I was just stating that its a bridge we haven't figured out how to cross yet. Our marriage is always and will always be a partnership and I wont man handle the situation to get what I want...I was just voicing how I appreciated the reminder from Hannah of all the other positive things that come with having a non-vegan husband. I may even find some great positives to how we end up proceeding with our family. I feel like I've learned a lot already.
You are so right!! I just can't get over the health factor and letting my husband, family, friends and co-workers how bad is for their health when they are the ones complaining to me how bad they feel about their ailments! It's so hard to not say anything to them when I care about them so much and know how easy it is to feel better by just eating vegan! Thank you for sharing, though - it does help.
Thank you for sharing 🙏🏾
I had a previous chronically ill partner, almost every month and throughout the week - issues with stomach, diarrhea, headaches, just discomfort in general.
No idea why this was happening.
She is a heavy meat-eater. Most of her diet, and claims it helps her body/the only thing she can really eat.
Being a vegan, I always had in the back of my mind the connection of eating SO much meat, every single day was why this was happening…
It’s so sad.. 😪
The best thing is having a vegan husband! Both of you are saving lives! But sometimes I wish he wouldn’t eat my snacks! Lol you’re a wonderful human being Hannah! You and your husband. :)
Melissa C OMGOSH Im the same with my vegan fiancé love it but he steals the last So Delicious nice cream bar every time! 😂
I would like to thank you for this video. My boyfriend is a vegetarian and I am a vegan. When we started our relationship I was eating meat and he didn't judge me or was pushing me to turn into a vegetarian. When I become a vegan I can't tell him to stop eating cheese because it would be unfair. He loves vegan food and we go to the vegan restaurants but if he want to order regular pizza with cheese I am fine with it. And this is really important in relationships to respects each other and love unconditionaly. I am so grateful that you focused on the positive side of this, this is very important. Somethimes you have to let it go, just to feel better with yourself. Thank you Hannah, I love you. Greetings from Poland 💕🥑🌈
Currently struggling with this! My boyfriend of 3 years became pescatarian about 9 months ago, which I thought was a step closer to becoming vegan, but now he won't stop talking about wanting to eat meat again. Which I understand people can have cravings or lapses, but he says he "doesn't care about the animals" which is what is really bothering me. I became vegan solely for the animals, then learned about the environmental & health impacts of meat. So it's very hard for me to hear my partner say how they don't care about animals or how they are treated, when that is a basically the complete opposite of my core beliefs. I don't push him, I try not to be judgmental, but it is very hard for me to wrap my head around.
sounds like a douche
If I were in your shoes (and I know I'm not) I would get out. You're not married. Life is too short. You deserve better. You can love him from a distance and wish him well. I believe there are plenty of men who may not be vegan now, but care about animals and will go vegan if they find out the truth.
Morgana D if he doesn’t care about the suffering of other sentient beings, it means he has psychopathic traits. I would get away and quickly. You can do better.
Morgana D I know this was commented some time ago but I hope you didn’t listen to the people above. Most cravings come from something that he’s not getting enough of that is easily found in meat, maybe iron from red meat or something from another meat source. He should take into account his diet and see if he’s getting nutrients & calories. Some people don’t make the connection and he might just be saying that he doesn’t care because of the cravings or he simply hasn’t made the connection. Whatever it be, I would just make sure he’s getting what he needs (preferably) from good sources
Love this video! My boyfriend is very open minded and in the first year of me being vegan he watched some documentaries and learnt about veganism etc and his eyes were opened to an extent and he would make arguments for veganism but he didn't actually change his diet in any way. After a year of this is i sat him down and i said I'm sorry i don't want to feel this way but it is really difficult for me that you say all this stuff but don't do anything about it and i cant watch you eat animals anymore. He then went veggie for January and has been vegetarian for a year now with the aims of being vegan in the near future. I have said to him when we live together i won't have any animal products in the house and if we have children they will be vegan and he completely agrees and wants to be vegan. I think because I have been so persistent in trying to change his habits he doesn't have a real drive to do it himself and is happy to just agree with the principles as if that's enough. So even though pushing him made him veggie it would have been much better if I had let him figure it out on his own rather than me provide him with all the info. I am going to also try and let go, with family members too, it's so hard because i feel responsible for the animals death if I invite a family member or friend out to eat and that's what they order. Do you have any tips on letting all that go?
I wouldn't be able to kiss someone after they ate meat. Meat looks so disgusting to me nowadays. Maybe it's just me being weird!
Also being vegetarian has changed my life for the better, I've connected more with myself through they choices I've been making. I wouldn't be able to be with someone that doesn't feel me on that level. I wouldn't get in a relationship with them in the first place because we wouldn't be compatible in that aspect. And I wouldn't want to use the same kitchen appliances and utensils. Again maybe I'm just weird.
But I'm happy that you have worked things out with your husband. It's amazing that he eats vegan with you and is so understanding. Everyone is different and some people make it work like you 🙌😊
Maria Pkm I used to think like you before I met a non-vegan guy that I like. I'm in love even knowing he still eats meat (I try not to think about his eating habits tho). He ditched dairy tho. I'm not expecting him to change, but yeah, I wouldn't kiss him after he ate meat cause ... a taste-like-meat kiss ain't sexy at all!! Haha.
Thanks for making this video. When I decided to go vegan I took my partner and our children with me. It was a serious and very big part of our daily lives during transition and was met with some resistance. I love your outlook. I personally don't know if I could do the same. If my partner knew all that he knows and still chose to support it, while my love wouldn't have changed my respect and admiration for him would have. With all that I've learned I don't see how paying someone to abuse animals is ever okay. A hunter, maybe because they have to do it themselves not buy prepackaged abuse without having seen the process.
Thank you Hannah, this helped me so much since my partner is not vegan either but I am. I've always loved him unconditionally but after hearing a lot of vegans opinions on youtube I got more and more angry with the fact that he is not vegan. Your video helped to change my focus on what's important again and gave me faith in my relationship with him xx
WOW the comments here are a mess. Good for you, Hannah. I love this so much and I know we don’t know each other but I love YOU and love watching you. I always go back and watch old videos over again and today realized I must have missed this one.
I’m sorry you’re receiving so many hateful comments. People being ugly and judgmental are not setting a good example or convincing anyone to go vegan, they’re just furthering the stereotype of vegans being judgmental and mean.
So thank you. Your marriage is YOURS and your relationship with people around you should not depend on whether or not others agree with you 100%. If you only love people who are your clones, you’ll fall into a narcissistic bubble world where you think everything goes your way and that’s not reality!
Reality is having to love people the way God loves us, unconditionally. Have a happy Tuesday, Hannah!
How do you think you will handle parenting as a vegan and non vegan? This is my current situation. I have accepted that my wife does not want to be vegan. It does still bother me, but I have stopped trying to force it. However, my wife and I adopted two children from foster care and have had them for about 4 years and we struggle to agree on food. Before the children came to us they were raised non vegan and when they came to us they were adjusting to a world of change and it wasn’t something I wanted to add to the list. Our oldest is nine now and he goes back and forth on veganism. He hates animal cruelty but has not quite developed the self control. They lived with us for 3 years before we found out we were able to adopt them. During that time they were considered children of the state and I was not in a position to alter their diet. Now that they are legal my children I struggle letting my wife feed them non vegan foods.My wife does support me and often makes vegan meals, but when it comes to raising vegan kids we struggle to agree. Do you have any advice? Sorry for the long story haha
I found you from your sister Ellen's videos. I've been watching you for a while now, and I think this is the 1st time I ever commented. I love how your so sweet, and cute, and funny, and quirky, but also Soo intelligent & articulate & well spoken. Your so right about Ellens videos, she's all artsy & Cinematic as well as entertaining & inspiring & informative. But you, seem so real & down to earth, I feel like you're talking to me like a friend. I love both you & your sisters videos. You two have many similarities, but what I enjoy are your differences.
My love for my partner is not unconditional! I'm so glad you're happy but I don't think that's a healthy aspiration for long term relationships. Of course petty and trivial conditions aren't necessary, but I think relationships should be reevaIuated and when they don't work unconditional love blinds a lot of people from removing themselves from relationships that are damaging. I guess I'm also not cut out in any way to be with a nonvegan, lol.
This is wonderful, thank you for your positivity! My partner isn’t vegan either and it was such a struggle at first, but I have also finally “let go” and it has made a world of difference for my happiness and his. It’s hard to think of how he eats meat sometimes but I know that eating meat is so ingrained in our culture that it is hard for many people to change. I think it’s only going to happen when that person is completely ready mentally and something just clicks!
A lot of what you said is very understandable. I was the other side of this coin. My boyfriend went vegan overnight 3yrs ago. I knew it was important to him and I couldnt deny any of his reasons. I went vegan too not that long after and it enriched our relationship tenfold. Im thankful for him.
Ive been vegan for 4 years and my boyfriend went vegetarian for me two years ago its not 100% perfect but its easily the sweetest thing hes done for me
This video is so needed. Thank you for creating this, Hannah. When you have compassion, you have it for all beings... all animals, human and non-human. Let's spread love wide and in every instant, including to those who don't share our values.
Thank you so much for this Hannah. My wife is so supportive of my choice to be an ethical vegan and cooks me vegan meals all the time. She’ll eat vegan food with me all the time but she’s unwilling to give up eating animals. We’ve definitely fought about this and I’ve been struggling to let it go but think I finally have and if I haven’t this video certainly did it for me. Thank you so much for making this video
I`ve never found another youtuber who talkes about this. My partner isn`t vegan but he respects my decisions and has dramatically changed his diet to eat more vegan meals anyway. I often feel like there are so many vegans who give the lifestyle choice a bad reputation and your video shows that compassion and love will always win. Thank you so much for an amazing video
My hubby is not vegetarian. I’v had to do the same as you. Accept and love. My big limits are: I don’t wanna see it or smell it, no cooking meat in the house, if you want to have meat in the fridge it must be cooked already (no raw things anywhere) and must be wrapped up and sealed.
thank you so much for bringing up this which is a reality for so many ppl!: you're so right.. having a non vegan husband and still loving and accepting them unconditionally makes you a better advocate and a person. The first year or so of me becoming vegan was .... stooorrrmmy.. i feel you girl . ! Now things are so much better and getting better all the time !
I love the way you discribe these difficult situations as something positive. Keep growing, love your video's!!
Do you cook non-vegan food for him or buy it at the grocery store?
and what about raising children? sorry i'm in the same positioning and i have so many questions.
This was interesting and refreshing to watch:) unfortunatly over years of dating non vegans i prefer having a partner who at least does not eat too many animal products. My fiance eats fish a few times a week but he just eats it at work or of my family or his family makes him seafood. My family eats a lot of seafood because my mom and middle sister eat pescatarian .. I guess so does my fiance lol. As long as two people feel comfortable all is well. It is important to communicate what is prefered and listen to your partners concerns or questions. My fiance has always loved that i am vegan and he prefers a ton of vegan food now and he always asks for his birthday cakes to be vegan so i can enjoy the cake with him . I respect him and i accept that he will eat what he wants to eat sometimes . He is very respectful and i am as well .. Sometimes i do rant about veganism but he knows its not directly at him and he knows i rant about other things😅. He gets it enough where we can have great conversations about it . i wish we were the same about religion.. I am super religious( I am Pagan) he is atheist haha but thats another thing all together;)
Thank you for making this video. My fiancé isn’t vegan and it is very challenging. But then i think of all the vegan food we do eat together and the changes he has made so far and it makes me really happy!
This was such a thoughtful video. I struggle a lot with wanting to control what other people do even beyond the scope of veganism because I want to help them.. While that is a noble intention, the way I go about it suffocates people and doesn't allow them to feel like I support and love them no matter what. It's so hard to let go of control but I've found that when I do, my life becomes a lot easier. Love you Hannah!
Hannah thank you so much for talking about this subject matter. As a vegan I find aspects of the vegan community to be judgemental and closed minded. I really do agree that love is the way not fear. There are too many conversations in this world that divide us compared to uniting us. Diversity is important and love is important.
Something that stood out for me was when I was asked by a very compassionate person why I do not have the same level of compassion for the insects that are killed during the harvesting of grains and vegetables. For in their culture, you have respect and gratitude for all forms of animal life, including the insects that die for a vegan meal to be made. There are also new studies that are suggesting that vegetables feel pain and have a nervous system.
Above all thank you for opening a discussion about love and not fear and control
I think how you have dealt with this through your relationship is absolutely amazing and really inspiring, as I'm the only vegan in my family, it's quite hard to 'make things work' sometimes. However, prior to comparing the heartbreaking process of dairy milk to rape, I would highly encourage you to research and take into consideration what actual, human rape is. The only reason I mention this is because the diary milk process is so, so different from what rape really is, most evidently in the post-rape emotions (i.e. PTSD, depression, anxiety, suicide, etc.), and I would never want a rape survivor to feel as if their suffering is being invalidated by comparison, vegan or non-vegan. Just something to think about. Your videos are wonderful and very inspiring to me.
I think it's immature to only want to date or commit to a vegan. What if you or they wake up one day and don't want to be vegan anymore and there's more important qualities to look at then someone's diet. I've been vegan for 3 years and dating my bf for almost 2 and he respects my eating choices and even tho he's not full vegan he sees me as an influence and was starving himself before we met not eating enough and now he looks so healthy and stopped eating cheese and red meat. He also got a bike and wants to workout with me. It makes me really proud and happy to see him grow. He's 27 and it's exciting to see how we will both grow in a few more years. Plus he's a sweetie and and he's amazing in bed. Just perfect for me even though he still loves his seafood. 😂😊 I think it's just important to focus on how you two are alike instead of letting food shift things in a negative way. But everyone is different I guess some people can't handle someone who is not just like them.
Wander x Waters that’s an ideal situation. Not all of us get a chance to be boastful about our significant other. Well done!!
I love your approach and share it. I only talk about it when my non-vegan wife and daughter ask a question or give me a comment and even then my intention is to embody my values and explain my views or actions, but not to make them feel guilty or to speak from a condescending POV. Your words are inspiring and reflect my practices of openness and true love without discrimination. Thank you!
*Hannah this video was everything! I also have a non-vegan boyfriend who I love so much and we literally just resolved a dispute that we had about this topic so this video was p e r f e c t timing. I totally agree with what you said and it's so nice to hear that someone else feels the same as me. Thanks for shining your light girl, you da best!*
NikkiVegan dump him. If he doesn’t care about the torture and murder of sentient beings, he’s heartless
I really needed this video Hannah! my partner and i have different religious and ethical beliefs (hes a meat eater and im not, hes a christian and im not religious) so its so nice to see others have the same problem of loving someone with different views/values
Olivia Cowie what you need is a partner who shares your ethical beliefs 😒
Love this so much! M husband is not vegan but now the vast majority of his meals are vegan. I transitioned after we had been together 11years and between our 3d and 4th babies. He and I have a wonderful relationship. Our home is plant based but he eats how he wants away from the house. That works well for us :)
I definitely needed to here this. I’ve been binge watching your videos like crazyyy! I just love who you’re as a person. You’re so you, and that’s what strongly draws me to watch and enjoy your videos, if that makes sense. Oh and not to mention you’re vegan! YAY! But yes. I’m fairly new to veganism. I’m 15 and am the only vegan in a family of 7 so it’s gets very difficult at times. But only because I make it difficult I feel. God is helping me get better and better each and every day with excepting and loving my family members for their lifestyle choices. Love you Hannah! ❤️👑✝️
I’m in the process of going vegan and although my husband does support me it upsets me sometimes that he doesn’t want to do the same and he sometimes complain that it’s “too much” but i really appreciate this video showing that it’s possible and can work. No matter the different beliefs.
Well said and wise as always. You’ve got a good head on your shoulders with eyes that see the world for more than surface level. Your compassion is contagious. Love it.
Everything you said makes perfect sense, I am vegan and my boyfriend isn't and honestly he has been always loving and helpful and understands why I live the way I do and even though he doesn't choose that life for him he supports me no matter what and at the end of the day that is what love is!