To Train Up a Child is the only book I ever requested to be removed from a library. My rationale was that it advocated things which are criminal in Canada (corporal punishment under a certain age and using a "tool" to strike children are both illegal). Thankfully the librarians agreed!
I just checked, and my local library doesn't have it either. They still have James Dobson's child abuse manuals though, so apparently all they need is a tiny bit of deniability. (I forget which specific book it was, but one of Dobson's books gives advice on how to properly traumatize your children once following his previous advice catches CPS's attention... My parents were fans)
Just checked my library (also in Canada) and going to make the same rationale here. It looks like it hasn't been brought to their attention before so on it as I listen to Rachel.
The whole "Autism didn't used to exist" thing really gets me. Ok- so my dad has one specific chair in every room and won't sit and any other chairs. He's eaten the exact same bowl of oatmeal for breakfast for 30 years. He hates change and barely speaks to people outside of the family. And my grandpa had very similar tendencies plus an obsessive wall to wall VHS collection. But it's oh so crazy that I have a Autistic brother 🤦♀️ ok, cool
Yessss, preach!!! My friends grandad was similar and then his son had similar traits and now the sons like "Autism didn't exist when I was a child" to his son, my friend who is Autistic 🙈
my dad has worn the exact same shirt in different colors for the past 30 years. he buys more from the same discount store once a year, organizes them by color, and buys a size too big because he refuses to wear tight shirts. he also only wears one pair of shoes. when they got discontinued i shopped with him for 4 hours to find a comfortable enough replacement, and he hates shopping. apparently it’s only me that’s autistic though, according to him 😭
My mom’s best fried growing up was diagnosed autistic in 1970. Her mother (god bless the woman, and thank god she had a choice) refused to put her in a psychiatric facility even though she was non verbal and some of her behaviors were dangerous. She was like ‘this is my kid, I’m an educator, I’ll cope’. When this best friend met my mom at four years old, she still didn’t really talk, would melt down when she went to another persons house, etc., she met my mom (who is also autistic- got diagnosed as an adult bc she had fewer support needs) and wanted to hang out with her so bad she was able to stay at my moms house without one of her parents present. Their favorite game was seeing how long they could hide and be quiet before someone found them. Both gained more confidence, and best friend actually became very verbal later on down the road- autism has always existed, people have only been receiving the diagnosis if their support needs are high enough. That’s literally it. We figured out more people are autistic than we thought. That’s it.
I have "trained" a lot of dogs over decades. By positive enforcement. Never ever would I treat a dog like that. To hear this sadistic shite used for babies is just beyond me. Never had to hit or shout at my child. Weirdly she is a well adjusted teenager. My parents shouted, hit and emotionally abused me. And I had years of therapy and am still fighting the trauma. Disgusting.
It always makes me cringe and cry inside when I see people talk about hitting children and argue that it was done to them and they "turned out ok" so it should be done to other children. Like bro you are on the internet advocating hitting a child. You didn't "turn out ok" 😢
@@TheSapphireLeoas someone who’s been (severely) mistreated and dehumanized by the medical community, I’m just going to second this. Normally, I’m not huge into thumping my beliefs, but at this point? Yeah. We’ve gotta stop this. People need to get over the fact that we are human _animals_ and that’s okay. This kind of “training” (corporal punishment) is actively manipulating human animal instincts and behavior. It’s absolutely monstrous to manipulate such a thing because it is causes huge damage to humans at a fundamental level of needing to be protected, fed, and kept safe from animals/the wild/etc. Also this whole comment section under the video is reminding me that other humans are just as good as the felines and canines I choose to spend my time around. Which is good because I was starting to dehumanize humans after having my own emotional and mental chain jerked around by some truly terribly and monstrous people for several years now.
Grooming, marital abuse, child abuse. All crimes are permissible when you're raised with the belief that all your sins have already been forgiven so long as you apologize.
and god will only forgive you if you do those sorts of crimes!! if you're a woman who had consensual premarital sex, or a queer person, or someone who follows another religion, then you're going to hell in the eyes of these types of fundies :/ (not saying those sorts of things are bad, they're certainly not. I'm very much of the opinion that if they're is a God, He made me queer, and He certainly wouldn't look down on consensual, harmless, fun or be so petty to condemn those who don't believe in Him)
The fact that this guy writes so openly about how he treated her... like it doesn't even cross his mind that someone could possibly think he's in the wrong!
On his honeymoon no less. And doesn’t seem to realize what an overbearing, inconsiderate, abusive sucker he was being, to the point that he documents it plain as day in his book without shame.
I wish it were banned in America. That book doesn't fall under free speech. Its only purpose is to incite people to commit horrible crimes against their children.
@@Alastariana It should be illegal in America. I'm not a lawyer, but I don't think the first amendment protects speech that encourages people to commit crimes, especially against children. It's so discouraging to see that disgusting book available on Amazon.
@@warlordofbritannia Cowards use the scarier d4. If you've spilled a tray of dice while barefoot in a dark room, you'll probably know what's scary about a d4.
I can't get past the honeymoon crabbing story and his "what a silly female!" takeaway. I can't believe he thought that was acceptable enough to write about publicly. Wild.
It's also environmental abuse. Why take all those crabs from their habitat to only eat a few of them. Were they feeding an army? This is why there are extinctions and near extinctions.
Dude made his wife cook and walk barefoot until she got her feet hurt, had sex multiple times with her barely if not at all willing, and has the audacity to be "oblivious" (not really, he just doesnt give a shit) about why his wife is breaking down ON THE HONEYMOON. Like i dont really expect much from a guy that groomed her but fucking hell
These are my parents lifelong heroes. We don’t interact anymore. Years of therapy and these names still make me feel so so ill. We were family friends of the paddock family, one of the adopted children who was murdered in the name of this shit. My heart breaks every day
blue bloods is straight up copaganda but one of my favorite quotes about parenthood comes from it, specifically by danny: “we made the choice to bring you into the world, you didn’t make the choice, we did. so a bargain was struck that day that you owe us nothing and we owe you everything.”
Being a doormat to an abuser doesn't mean you're making the most of your life. It means you're making the most of THEIR life and letting them get away with shit AT THE EXPENSE OF YOUR WELL-BEING AND TIME AND LABOR
@@morgianasartre6709They actively taught dangerous abuse tactics to use on children that could absolutely kill a child. An abusive parent who reads their book and implements their methods could feel emboldened to continue. “To Train a Child” is actively encouraging violence against children and is a cause of death 100%. The abusers are the most at fault, but a book that says it’s a good thing to abuse your children and “here are some new tactics” is a direct cause of more dangerous abuse.
@@morgianasartre6709 Hospital paperwork when someone dies has a list of things _linked to_ the death. You might find someone who died of asphyxiation caused by lung collapse caused by perforated pleural membranes caused by thoracic gunshot wound. Each of those is, officially, "linked to" the death. That doesn't mean the gunshot would didn't cause the death.
It makes me mad and sad that some women and girls in this country are told to endure and enjoy being treated this way! Not even on their honey moon are they treated nice! A slave to their husbands from the get go!
@@fehyndana7725 I know! They’re told a wife and mother is all they should ever aspire to be and then they are disrespected (at best) even in those assigned roles. Heartbreaking.
I forgot how the Pearls are Sith Lords, especially when it comes to “show no mercy, utterly crush your kids.” Raising children should not resemble the Art of War.
One time at work I said to my coworker “that was such a big yawn for such a little man” because that’s what I say to my pug and it’s been months but I’m still mortified
When I was deep in the Christian religion (cult) I was gifted a Debi Pearl book by an older lady in our church. “Created to Be His Helpmeet.” She had written and printed out her own study guide on the book as well. Even back then, 11 years ago now, I read it and felt horrified by what was written. It made me so sick that I burned the book in our back yard. It really helped me deconstruct the religion and now I am a happy atheist! The Pearls are disgusting criminals. Thank you for covering them and I hope you take a huge mental health break after this one.
Mostly, I would see books by James Dobson on the shelves in the homes of Bible group leaders, but he is almost as bad as the Pearls. Debi seems to be a victim of him and then later on colluded in abusing as many victims of abusers do later on. Calling women and girls 'females' is degrading, and it's how misogynists describe them. Normally, honeymooners stay in hotels with full or half board or close to restaurants near by so nobody has to cook.
Two things: 1) Im glad that you do videos that call these monsters out. People STILL reference their "child rearing" methods, and it makes me sick. I aint even got kids, and it makes me sick. 2) Your hair and makeup look especially pretty! You're always lovely, but you're especially so today! I'm glad you exist and share your time and talents with us.
As I was around 10 years old (extremely dysfunctional, loveless, without any kind of patience-household) I developed severe OCD. My parents sent me to a therapist, wich I maybe saw 5 or 6 times and as I did not get the magical cure from it they thought I would receive, they stopped going there with me. From then on I was abused to instill pain and fear in me to stop my OCD rituals. My mother beat me up with her bare hands , (turning faucets on and off, turning light switches on and off. etc) house shoes, wet towels, everytime I did a OCD ritual. My father screamed at me everyday because he was stressed by my mother screaming at him and once hit me several times on my shoulder so that I got a giant bruise on it. What did that teach me? I'm now 36 years old, with OCD, conducting my rituals only when I'm alone and where noone can see me. Don't. Beat. Your. Kids. These fkin monsters.
Conservative Christians: Marriage and family are beautiful. Why shouldn't you aspire to have those things? 😢 Also conservative Christians: If your wife and kids are failing to meet your unrealistic expectations, here are some tips and tricks to treat them like garbage 😁
As someone who grew up in a house of 7 I wouldn’t recommend to have that many children unless you are able to provide for them. My father was the only one that work and sometimes he would just not work. He would just quit working. As we got older we would rarely have more than two meals a day and they were small portions as well. Had mold growing everywhere, roach infestation, letting things go unprepared. We ended up losing our home and had to move into a two bedroom home. My parents got one room and all five of us had to live in the other. It was crowded. The power or water would go out every other month. We got constantly yelled for being “ungrateful “. It got worst when my mother passed I had to become a parent in the home and to make sure we had meals. Sometimes we only had one meal a day and just bananas or almost expired bread for “snacks” . My education was ruined as well cause I was homeschooled and my mother put in all the work and when she passed my father didn’t enrolled me into the next grades. All of my siblings don’t have a high school diploma. I have gotten judged for agreeing with my husband we want to wait till we can afford to have a kid or two. Please don’t have kids if you can’t afford it or are willing to put in the work to raise children. Please.
I was one of 10 and while my childhood wasn't as difficult as yours sounds, I definitely agree. We always had food and somewhere to sleep but there were too many of us for them to emotionally invest in any of us as much as we needed and all of us girls have been parentified at one stage or another. I don't know if it's possible to emotionally care for that many kids.
Touching is one of the very first ways little kids use to explore and understand the world, picking objects up and looking at them from different angles is part of the development of sight, and manipulation with the hands builds motor skills and again HELPS US SEE IN THREE DIMENSIONS. Besides the fact beating tiny children is monstrous, denying them the ability to learn from their environment by touching stuff is absolutely MANIACAL 🤬
The thing about the Pearls is that they aren't just advocating punishing your small children for the developmentally necessary act of touching things, they are advocating SETTING UP ESPECIALLY TEMPTING SITUATIONS TO MAKE SURE YOU GET TO PUNISH THEM. It's horrific.
I will NEVER understand parents who beat kids as a form of teaching them. That's how ASPD can be created in people. By teaching children 'touching the glass is wrong because you'll get hit' they'll associate touching the glass as bad because it gets them hurt, not that it's wrong because it's someone elses property. So, perhaps later in life when they touch someone elses things and don't get hit, they won't associate it with being wrong. This can extend to them not actually conceptualising a grasp of what is right and wrong due to morality, but rather something being right or wrong because the law simply says so and punishment ensues if they break it. Absolutely setting children up for faliure.
Conservatives: Have kids! They are the most important and precious things in the world! Me: Yes I agree, that is why I am waiting to have them until I can afford a safe and healthy lifestyle for them. I want to make sure to be the best mom I can, before having a baby! Conservatives: No not like that! Make it make sense ...
They only want to force children on women/people so that A: They can be easier to control, and B: So that these extra children can grow up to be "Christian soldiers", cheap labour, republican voters, or at least white because these ppl are often paranoid about being "replaced" by those scary non white people
That’s the reason I’m not having them- I struggle greatly with my mental health and feel that due to the habits my parents ended up shoving onto me, among other things, I won’t be able to effectively care for them, ever. No matter how much I want them
Calling children 'the most precious things' is a lie they tell themselves and others. Children to them are soldiers and slaves to be indoctrinated into the cult to continue it's existence. They're also there to serve you now that you're the one in power. It's a truly vile worldview, one that should be worthy of having your kids taken from you, but given how broken child protective services are they likely won't end up in a better situation.
I got legit chills on the crab story. This man is literally the emobodyment of my worst fear that keeps me from dating men (not that I miss it honestly).
I can't believe this man wrote a book about abusing his wife with SO LITTLE SELF AWARENESS. How weird women are for being angry when you don't let them sleep, r8pe them, and force them to drag your bag of crabs barefoot (i.e. doing all the hard work while you're enjoying yourself)... He totally wouldn't be furious at a tiny part of all that
I appreciate the fact that you have the emotional intelligence so that you're able to recognize where you're at and to take appropriate measures in order to protect your well-being. Best wishes!
My personal act of self-care: not watching this right now. I will come back to it. I shouldn't watch this in my current mental state and I know this so imma be sensible. I hope any of you in a similar place takes care of themselves too❤❤❤
child development student here... their justification for blanket training, etc. is sick but it actually is based on child psychology. its just the abusive side of the same coin and they admit as much when they say they're using conditioning! but their children aren't learning to do good, just that they will be punished when they do wrong. ugh. [insert rant about how christianity does this with the idea of hell anyway.] this shit makes my blood boil. thank you for talking about it rachel, great video as always :)
I'm sure this video is going to be horrific but before we get into that just want to say that with your green makeup and red hair your giving off some serious pamela isley (poison ivy) vibes. Looks great hope you don't want to destroy humanity with plants (apart from the pearls they can be composted).
These Pearls don't deserve to be cast before swine, or pitched in the compost. I wouldn't want to insult the swine or the compost by throwing absolute garbage to them.
I honestly find horrifying how much the grooming affected Debi's psyche. How much she coerced hersel into accepting, even appreciating abuse. She could have been a smart girl once, and at the start of their marriage when she clearly explained to him what he did wrong and was angry and pouted, there she honestly should have escaped. Debi might have been smart once, but she surely was never brave. And that's a pity. She's stuck forever being the happy victim of a sociopath.
@@jenniferbrower Probably, but If that could always be the excuse than humans would never had done any progress. I think that many times some people instinctually know that something is wrong and try to break free of the mold despite everything that society says to them. It's something in their own predisposition. It's bravery, emotional intelligence and stubbornness. Unfortunately, not everyone is like this, and that's why progress is so slow. Especially If you add to the mix emotional and phisical abuse, which stumps many personal progresses a person can make.
@@chichi77timIt isn't as if she was a blank slate before she met him. She came into that relationship pre-groomed by her church and likely her family. I grew up in the 60's and 70's and even at my Chicago public high school in the 1970's, a girl's track team was perceived as potentially taking resources away from boy's sports. The male sports coaches saw us as a threat. We had no support from the school and relied on the activism of our volunteer coach. This is but one example. But even in this totally secular situation, the misogyny was rampant from those with vested interests in maintaining the status quo.
Where they complain about women being in secret service, because "women are empathetic" - even if it was true that no woman can match no man in the physical aspect of the job (evidently not true, since women do work in these fields), it never even occurs to these people that empathy and emotional skills are actually huge assets in this line of work. Policing, security and intelligence collecting are not all about brute force. The stereotypical feminine 'soft' skills make women very good spies (just like, ironically, the fact that women tend to be underestimated by men!), and there's research showing that the presence of female officers is much more likely to lead to de-escalation of potentially violent situations.
(This comment contains stuff about violence) My grandpa is 87 years old, and he STILL talks about how his father would beat the s...t out of him and his brothers back when they were kids. Grandpa still talks about neighbours stepping in to stop his father, because they were worried that one of the boys would get horribly injured or worse. 87 years old... and he's clearly traumatised from what happened more than 70 years ago. Also... my ex was subjected to a lot from his mum, and he kept expressing guilt and fear whenever someone realised it and tried to help him. He would scream apologies in his sleep and wake up exhausted, only to get into a rage of sorts when someone asked him how he was doing. He protected his mum from everyone who seemed negative towards her, and was rewarded with things no person should have to go through. Him apologising to her tomb stone (she had a massive heart attack when we were 18)... him apologising for not being a better son... she failed miserably as a parent. Rumours says that my ex is doing way better now, but I still have those moments where I worry about the possibilty of him one day being like my grandpa: looking back with anger and hurt, unable to work through the trauma. The Pearls insisting that their way is "Gods way" is infuriating, and it actually makes me question their supposed faith in God. They're actively breaking people, and should be imprisoned for what they're doing. How many of their kids have those nightmares where they're apologizing? How many of them will look back and feel betrayed? Now, to be clear: my grandpa would never raise a hand against another person (let alone a child), and my ex stated time and time again that he wanted to be child free to be sure that the family cycle would be broken completely. The Pearl children? I'm not convinced. Still... who THE F... would raise a hand against a CHILD? The Pearls are just... they need jail. Both Michael and Debi need jail. Throw away their keys. Keep them locked up. They represent evil, and they've failed even harder than what my great grandpa and my ex-boyfriends mum did. I actually want to make some waffles for my grandpa and show him videos of cute baby goats now (he loves baby goats... and puppies, kittens and the occassional chicken video)
1:12:14 I think they’re trying to convince themselves that they’re right. Like Classically Abby was always saying how having kids is so hard and stressful and thankless and isolating but it’s good cause she has achieved a higher level of happiness that doesn’t involve actually being happy
This is definitely something you can see in my next video - I’m only halfway through filming it at the moment and I won’t give away what it is just yet but it’s reviewing a certain book with this basically as its central theme!
thank you so much for raising awareness and continuing to speak on this!! i remember seeing the “to train up a child” book in my parents’ garage when i was in my early teens and not really knowing what it was, but looking back on it they were 100% following a large amount of the teachings within it…because of this i am now a 23 year old disabled adult with fibromyalgia, chronic migraines, and CPTSD still recovering from an almost 4 year ab*sive relationship that i ended up in due to how i was raised how anyone can watch the joy and will to live drain from their child’s eyes because of these teachings and still choose to implement them will forever be beyond my understanding i hope anyone who has gone through this is able to heal and has support from their friends and/ or community ❤️
When I was young, this was a book that was recommended by the church my family attended, and my parents read and used as a guide for raising myself and my 3 siblings. Listening to this video is definitely bringing back some memories I think I had tucked away in a little box. Also as a kid/teen, I always assumed that I’d use similar punishments and “techniques” when I had kids. Now as an adult the thought of spanking or hitting any of my potential future children is just sickening to me. I remember how awful the skin on skin spankings were, and can’t imagine inflict that sort of intentional pain upon a child.
I've got my vomit bucket ready, let's go! The pearls are the absolute worst that purity culture has to offer, and that's saying something. Yikes, thank you for reading and researching all their nonsense for us.
Yeah, it took 5 minutes to get the to part where she talks about "claiming" him, an adult, while she was 13. These three hours are going to be rough. I get that children can pretty easily develop crushes on adults, that happens. Normally they do not end up marrying them.
I don’t understand why they insist on projecting malice onto the actions of babies. They’re not doing things just to hurt you or cause you distress. They’re babies. They just want food, sleep, shelter, and love.
Well they believe that babies are intentional sinners that deserve hellfire until they accept Christ. To them, they believe it actually *is* an internal sinful nature that must be beaten out. Truly sad.
When I was in fundamentalist churches, I would question original sin as I didn't like the idea of every human being born evil. But fundamentalist mothers would say that their demanding babies and toddlers were like the way they were because they were evil, rather than undeveloped, and therefore unable to look after themselves so they were frustrated if their needs weren't met immediately. Humans are the least developed animal species at birth. Foals and calves are able to walk from birth. It takes a human a year after birth to be able to walk.
@8114梦见 Even crying for food as babies and toddlers means that they are evil according to fundamentalist Christians. So even newborns aren't fed at night and only once every four hours during the day.
Did I wake up to a 3 hour video on Michael and Debbie Pearl from the amazing Rachel?! Oh, it’s gonna be a GREAT Wednesday!! I’ve been researching a lot of parenting/homeschool videos and fundie parent videos (Miriam Anderson started a cascade effect), and this fits in perfectly! Thank you for doing that emotional work of researching this chaos for us 💙💙
Also, I went to Bible college and my husband I met there (thankfully we’re out now). When we were engaged, the school recommended we buy the pearl’s books to prep for marriage. I bought how to be a helpmeet along with the accompanying devotional workbook, and I worked through those twice before we got married. We also read through to train up a child together and had lots of discussions about how we would raise our children (thankfully we’ve done a complete 180° on our beliefs and our children have no clue about the church because most of them have never been)
I have to translate a 50-question survey from Dutch to French right now so this is the perfect 'actually interesting content I don't have to look at' auditory companion for this afternoon's work.
It is wild to me that you can listen to something in English, and translate from Dutch to French! That's so many languages at once 😂 I can barely listen and work in English 😂
@@thatbtchinthecomments9978 it's actually easier to listen to something in a different language for me because it won't mess with what I'm doing. You ever had the thing where you were typing something but overhear people talking and then you type what they were saying? Or you're saying something and seeing text at the same time and then you end up saying what you read? I have that when I listen to things in the language I'm working in.
@@marlyd I get caught out by my own mind thinking about what I'm going to type next. I'll be trying to type an explanation that "These particular devices have an unfortunate tendency to demonstrate some rather exciting bits of chemistry," and I'll think about whether "aspects of chemistry" is better than "bits of chemistry" and type "unfortunate tenspects" or something like that.
@@marlydIt makes sense that a third language would interfere less than the two you are working with, but I can't even listen to songs with lyrics when doing housework. The cognitive load is too much.
So if your baby really wants to climb stairs, MAYBE use the time you have to watch her, supervise and allow her a chance to try on her own, instead of beating her for being curious and wanting to be active and explore her world!!! I dunno!! Watching my son and what he can do on the playground makes my heart so happy, he has been working on these skills since he could crawl and now he can climb and run and ride a scooter so confidently!
Just wow. I have a 3.5 year old son and I TEACH, not TRAIN, him so he can stay safe and be happy. When I tell him No, I explain my reason- usually his safety, or others safety, or socially acceptable behavior. I would never want him to fear me. I want him to understand when I say No it’s because I care about him. I never want him to feel broken or defeated or submissive. I give him as much freedom as I safely can. I love seeing him explore the world and learn new skills. He is so awesome and a shining star. I can’t imagine wanting to break his spirit.
My horrible MIL gave my husband and I To Train Up a Child as a Christmas gift last year with rave reviews of how well it worked for her. She of course hasn’t seen our children since. The crazy thing is she’s not even religious. She just likes beating kids I guess. I knew she was awful, but my husband had blocked out any memories of physical abuse, so I was genuinely shocked.
I was raised reading their books Preparing to be a HelpMeet and Created to be a HelpMeet in a girls bibles study. The amount of blame that is placed on the women in the relationships is staggering. There is ZERO accountability for the men, and there was a story of a woman who was being physically abused, the moral of that story was that her husband was eventually saved because she stuck around, suffered through it all, and showed gods grace. He never apologized, he just stopped hitting her and they touted her as an angel from above. They don’t support divorce, even if the husband is abusive or a pedo towards the children, you should report him and then visit him in jail. And keep the kids out of reach until they age out of the preferred range. I have been out of my home for almost a decade now, and the entire time I have been in therapy to recover from that bullshit and the abusive relationship I landed in immediately after leaving home due to what I was taught to accept. I took those books out of my parents home the last time I was there so they could not be exposed to my sister.
The "funny" thing is that they justify their "training" with the claim that if you do this to a very young child, you won´t have to spank them when they are older. But then they nullify their own claim right away. The large amount of instructions on how to beat older kids that their books contain, proves that very obviously. Oh, and I was already autistic in 1975, and didn´t get diagnosed until 2022...
I've raised three children by myself, all of which have grown up to be great, and blanket training is a power trip. Blanket training is no different than predators Preying on The weak. You want your children to fear bad actions and disappointing you, not you in general. Blanket training teaches children that you're unpredictable and they should fear you at all times.
A NEW MULTIPLE HOURS LONG RACHEL OATES VIDEO! I SHALL USE THIS TO DISTRACT MY ADHD BRAIN WHILE WORKING UNTIL I CAN RECITE EVERY WORD OF EVERY SENTENCE. no seriously, thank you so much for continuing to get me through everyday life and even the most stressfull exam phases. I really needed something new after rewatching the Bethany Beal videos almost every week since they were uploaded.
Important note about Gabriel Pearl: the wife mentioned on the website is his second wife, and the first one has basically been scrubbed from the record. Who knows what happened to her? TO BE CLEAR this should not be anyone else's business, but given the way the Pearls talk about the perfection of their family, it does seem relevant in this case. We do know that at least some of the Pearl kids aren't legally married to their spouses because ((mumble mumble something about gay marriage?? I don't remember)) so they were married by Michael but don't have state marriage certificates.
Michael would never marry his kids to a same sex person, my guess they are not legally married so that the wife doesn't get any legal rights and alimony if she wants to leave. Gabriel's first wife probably couldn't stand the abuse anymore and left
@@fehyndana7725I think the gay marriage thing could tie in with them saying that the state has desecrated legal marriage by allowing it, so they will no longer partake. Probably something like that. But I wouldn’t dismiss your guess either… seems highly likely.
thank you for your hard work, rachel. as someone who suffered emotional, physical, and s3xual abuse as a child (and my parents reasoned it to "that's what we knew, that's what i learned"), this topic is close to my heart. rachel, bestie, please take care of yourself well.
This is what happened to the Turpins. They couldn't even cope with a few children as what happened to the eldest child who was at first sent to school. She was sent to school in dirty clothes and unwashed. Don't keep having babies every year if one is too much to cope with.
I'm a single woman (gasp) with two German shepherds. Training is pointless without mutual love and respect. You want your dog to run to you when worried, not away. My dogs come and get me when they want something or find something exciting because they want my approval and for me to know they did good. My oldest is a former shelter dog and I barely even use commands anymore, we have loved each other for seven years and he just knows what I expect from him, and we trust each other blindly. I never even considered hitting him and breaking that trust. Yes, tell them when they do wrong, but treat them well and they will want to do right. There are different ways to raise kids and train dogs but Jesus Christ, fear shouldn't be one of them.
Hi Rachel, just wanted to thank you for always giving the asexual community a shout-out. We get left out of conversations a lot and it's always really nice you make sure we're included.
Ahhh the Autism stuff - cell phones - I am in my late 50's and autistic. There were no cellphones when I was conceived. My sister and I are pretty sure that Dad (born in 1939) was also autistic... Same thing with vaccines - dad had very few vaccines as a kid. And the MMR did not exist when I was small...
Ah nostalgia the pearls train up a child was the first video i saw from you. I instantly subbed that day. So excited to see you take them down in a eloquent and funny way.
25:51 my husband and I will play around like this. The game is he’s got to get me into the bedroom. HOWEVER I’m always LAUGHING while putting up the struggle. Hell my favorite game is making him chase me for the third kiss (he thinks 3 kisses in a row is good luck). But the screaming comment really puts a bad feeling in my gut, there should be no hint of “I don’t like this”.
I would love to know if children that receive this “training” are developmentally behind (crawling, walking, etc.)… the important months and years of these babies’ lives are filled with fear and being told not to move. I can’t imagine that’s good for any types of development.
The public school thing is heartbreakingly real. I was the only child in my religious family to go to public school, and to this day I am scared to come out to them for fear of that being blamed and therefore limiting the education of future kids in the family. Kids need to be exposed to different kinds of things, or else it's just brainwashing, something they're ironically so concerned about. I would have been aroace whether I knew the word or not.
Thank you for putting into words the difference between self focused and selfish...had to pause and rewind so I could write down your definitions there. It's a distinction I've struggled with in the past and have been getting a feel for over the last several years, but you've explained it much more clearly than I've yet to manage. So thanks! ❤❤
them referencing classical conditioning of any kind as a good method to "train" your child is wild, given that behaviourist methods of teaching in general have long been abandoned as too simplistic. plus, one of the main behaviourist scientists, Watson, and his wife, who insisted on raising their kids according to these rules, SERIOUSLY psychologically damaged them. i just started teacher training and this is part of the first block of pedagogic theory you learn. it is truly basic stuff. what the pearls are saying is not only unbelievably cruel, it's also unlikely to work on anything more complex than "don't do x thing".
Oh they would have HATED having someone like me as a child. I got my butt whooped constantly, difference was i did it knowing id get in trouble and to me, it was worth it to do what i wanted even if i got in trouble. I take my whooping with a smile on my face then immediately do it again. I was unbreakable, i would have literally taken death over being told what to do. My stubbornness knows no bounds. Plus, im sure he wouldnt have liked how i threw all our bibles out the window because i didnt like them and thought they were stupid when i was 5 😂 im proud of little me
@@archervine8064 Oh I wouldnt be surprised either. It's not like I was a bad kid, I was just a "tomboy" and "not very lady like" which I know would just be the greatest sin to them. Luckily I wore my parents down and they let me be who I wanted but I doubt i would have gotten that outcome from them. I would not be able to tolerate those people.
Having been in an abusive relationship for a number of years (safely out now), all I can say is this style of parenting sets children up to accept abuse as normal. Being beat doen physically or mentally until you submit by someone who says they do it because they love you? Behind closed doors? Very familiar. Also - no matter what words you put on it, it's hitting a kid who can't defend themselves and needs you for survival.
I hate the "women are inherently gentle" narrative. When I started working customer service, I realized I was terrified of women raising their voices. Thanks mom.
"Raising an autistic child is like being in a prison"- bullsh*t. I was the CHILLEST kid. I could be left alone, reading a book or in my own make believe world for HOURS from a pretty young age. Like, sure, A very high support needs child might be super hard for a parent to cope with, especially if they don't have adequate support and education, but autism is a HELL of a spectrum, we aren't all super difficult boys who throw tantrums and can't talk and act out by screaming and hitting. The fact that so many of us go undiagnosed till adulthood kind of PROVES that many of us aren't difficult. It's not only AFAB folk either, I know a lot of boys who weren't "difficult" enough to get diagnosed as kids, or who had parents who were concerned with their children being "labelled".
This comment actually made me ask my Mum what it was like raising me. Granted I wasn't diagnosed until I was 19, we didn't even suspect it until I was 18, but it's because we both knew nothing about the wider autism spectrum. If you look at a list of common signs of autism in girls though, it's almost all relevant for me. But I did ask her what it was like to raise me and she said I was a pleasure. In her words, she loved the way my brain worked. There were difficult moments, when I was more picky and particular and "weird", but my Mum said that she just accepted that was who I was. I was a good kid who never misbehaved outside of trying to finish her work past the bell or reading under the desk. I loved cartoons and dolls, even as a teenager. I didn't go out late or do anything I wasn't supposed to. I was just a quirky, dreamy kid who just wanted her life to be peaceful, her grades to be good and her toys to feel loved. You're right about high support needs kids, I can imagine that would be a different experience. But there are just as many kids like you and I. The autism spectrum is huge and a lot of kids on the spectrum just need some patience, a little understanding and unconditional love, something I was incredibly fortunate to have even if we didn't really know how much I needed it.
My parents sung my praise growing up. I was quiet, kept to myself most of the time, followed rules, gained independence at a young age, did well in school and had a small group of close knit friends. My teachers loved me and my parents said I "practically raised myself" I got diagnosed with ADHD at 16 and autism at 24, my family struggled to accept my diagnoses because of how good I was as a child
As somebody who is big into developmental psychology. They are a disgrace to piaget’s theory of cognitive development, Vygotsky’s theory of social development, Kohlberg’s theory of moral development, and every method they use would utterly destroy a child’s ability to surmount Erikson’s psychocrises. These people are literally doing the opposite of what one would do to properly raise a child. It’s actually kind of impressive how exactly diametrically wrong they are. Sorry, this is a great analysis, but I can’t watch anymore of this video. My mental health must be guarded from shit like this
Thank goodness for Kyra, her adorable little snorts were the perfect punctuation to the waking nightmare of the Pearls. ❤ Please give her a little smooch on her forehead to say thanks for me!
As a man on the asexual spectrum in particular demisexual. I always get so frustrated at the people who act like men are sexual creatures all the time. That type of thinking does harm to everybody and allows predators to hide behind excuses.
idk i just feel like as someone who was gender nonconforming and in the american public school system for a very long time, i really can’t suspend my disbelief enough to believe that there was this huge group of non-binary bullies in rural tennessee picking on the local christian youths. kids like that definitely exist out there, i’ve met a lot of trans gay non-binary etc assholes, but they were getting their shit stolen and having stuff thrown at them along w the rest of us. and i went to public school in a pretty urban area, but people were still calling me slurs at 7 in the morning and throwing pencils at my head in the hallways. i dunno man i’m just skeptical about that story. only part of it i find plausible is that there were other teen boys threatening to sexually assault guys as a way of bullying, but those were always the straight guys in my experience. the ones talking about fuckin each other in the ass were the ones calling me slurs at 7 in the morning lmao.
Public School is brutal indeed but it's no secret that fundie Christians yearn for persecution so they can be Martyrs for Jesus and love to tell/invent stories like these 😂
i have never heard of most people you talk about but i'm always SAT for your videos. you do such an amazing research and crearly puts lots of effort in every single one of your videos and i'm really glad for the information you provide! these people deserve to be called out, amazes me they're not in prison
Lovely T shirt Rachel! Our music videos are pretty good too guys, and they can be found here ⬅️😊
❤❤❤
Checked you guys out for the first time today and you make beautiful music!
@@rebellhochzehn2916 thank you!
I'm following you on Spotify now. Fine music! Silly Little Life and This Old House are my favorites after listening for the first time.
@@MagisterialVoyagerpop 00-7 00-7
Teaching a baby not to touch, but apparently not teaching that to a grown man?
They have higher expectations of literally a newborn than they have of adult men.
Exactly what I thought!
They treat grown men like toddlers, who can’t control themselves and needed stuff hidden from them:
Michael just needs some loving, corrective instruction ... with a ceramic pipe.
The man of the household too 😃😃😃😃🔫🔫🔫🔫
To Train Up a Child is the only book I ever requested to be removed from a library. My rationale was that it advocated things which are criminal in Canada (corporal punishment under a certain age and using a "tool" to strike children are both illegal). Thankfully the librarians agreed!
I just checked, and my local library doesn't have it either. They still have James Dobson's child abuse manuals though, so apparently all they need is a tiny bit of deniability. (I forget which specific book it was, but one of Dobson's books gives advice on how to properly traumatize your children once following his previous advice catches CPS's attention... My parents were fans)
Amazon still sells it.
Dobson is also evil.
Just checked my county libraries' database, and no Michael Pearl books available! 👏
Mine doesn't have To Train Up a Child but it does have Holy Sex: The Way God Intended. Would love to have Rachel go over it!
Just checked my library (also in Canada) and going to make the same rationale here. It looks like it hasn't been brought to their attention before so on it as I listen to Rachel.
The whole "Autism didn't used to exist" thing really gets me. Ok- so my dad has one specific chair in every room and won't sit and any other chairs. He's eaten the exact same bowl of oatmeal for breakfast for 30 years. He hates change and barely speaks to people outside of the family. And my grandpa had very similar tendencies plus an obsessive wall to wall VHS collection. But it's oh so crazy that I have a Autistic brother 🤦♀️ ok, cool
Yessss, preach!!! My friends grandad was similar and then his son had similar traits and now the sons like "Autism didn't exist when I was a child" to his son, my friend who is Autistic 🙈
@@pensivecircles my grandma's almost certain she's autistic after learning about my diagnosis.
my dad has worn the exact same shirt in different colors for the past 30 years. he buys more from the same discount store once a year, organizes them by color, and buys a size too big because he refuses to wear tight shirts. he also only wears one pair of shoes. when they got discontinued i shopped with him for 4 hours to find a comfortable enough replacement, and he hates shopping. apparently it’s only me that’s autistic though, according to him 😭
My mom’s best fried growing up was diagnosed autistic in 1970. Her mother (god bless the woman, and thank god she had a choice) refused to put her in a psychiatric facility even though she was non verbal and some of her behaviors were dangerous. She was like ‘this is my kid, I’m an educator, I’ll cope’. When this best friend met my mom at four years old, she still didn’t really talk, would melt down when she went to another persons house, etc., she met my mom (who is also autistic- got diagnosed as an adult bc she had fewer support needs) and wanted to hang out with her so bad she was able to stay at my moms house without one of her parents present. Their favorite game was seeing how long they could hide and be quiet before someone found them. Both gained more confidence, and best friend actually became very verbal later on down the road- autism has always existed, people have only been receiving the diagnosis if their support needs are high enough. That’s literally it. We figured out more people are autistic than we thought. That’s it.
Autism diagnosis is at an all-time high because pediatric psychiatrists want to hook your child and then have you coming back at a rate of $300/hr.
I have "trained" a lot of dogs over decades. By positive enforcement. Never ever would I treat a dog like that.
To hear this sadistic shite used for babies is just beyond me.
Never had to hit or shout at my child. Weirdly she is a well adjusted teenager.
My parents shouted, hit and emotionally abused me. And I had years of therapy and am still fighting the trauma.
Disgusting.
Yes to all of this!
I’m so sorry you went through that but I’m so glad you could come out of it stronger and treating others better 🥰
It always makes me cringe and cry inside when I see people talk about hitting children and argue that it was done to them and they "turned out ok" so it should be done to other children. Like bro you are on the internet advocating hitting a child. You didn't "turn out ok" 😢
Also speciesism and childism also need to end and if you want egalitarianism and not jealousy?
@@TheSapphireLeoas someone who’s been (severely) mistreated and dehumanized by the medical community, I’m just going to second this.
Normally, I’m not huge into thumping my beliefs, but at this point? Yeah. We’ve gotta stop this. People need to get over the fact that we are human _animals_ and that’s okay. This kind of “training” (corporal punishment) is actively manipulating human animal instincts and behavior. It’s absolutely monstrous to manipulate such a thing because it is causes huge damage to humans at a fundamental level of needing to be protected, fed, and kept safe from animals/the wild/etc.
Also this whole comment section under the video is reminding me that other humans are just as good as the felines and canines I choose to spend my time around. Which is good because I was starting to dehumanize humans after having my own emotional and mental chain jerked around by some truly terribly and monstrous people for several years now.
Had to read the book, "Don't Shoot the Dog" as a wildlife rehabber.
“papa bear”….”my innocent lady pose” THIS IS SMUT
GIGGLING BECAUSE WHAT IN THE WATTPAD
@@cceerryyss_bb hahaha FR they would’ve ATE up wattpad if they were born in a different era (possibly writing about jesus still idk)
And just you wait until Debi’s anti-smut rant later 🤭
That is so accurate.
5:04 it's all smut from the beginning
Grooming, marital abuse, child abuse. All crimes are permissible when you're raised with the belief that all your sins have already been forgiven so long as you apologize.
Not even apologize, but pull an excuse out of the butt
Apologise to your own invisible friend, at that, not to any of the victims of the abuse.
Islam and Christianity in a nutshell
Not apologize to the person who was abused, but just an “apology” to god. 🙄
and god will only forgive you if you do those sorts of crimes!! if you're a woman who had consensual premarital sex, or a queer person, or someone who follows another religion, then you're going to hell in the eyes of these types of fundies :/
(not saying those sorts of things are bad, they're certainly not. I'm very much of the opinion that if they're is a God, He made me queer, and He certainly wouldn't look down on consensual, harmless, fun or be so petty to condemn those who don't believe in Him)
The fact that this guy writes so openly about how he treated her... like it doesn't even cross his mind that someone could possibly think he's in the wrong!
“Silly woman, always crying after getting her feet sliced open and probably infected!”
On his honeymoon no less. And doesn’t seem to realize what an overbearing, inconsiderate, abusive sucker he was being, to the point that he documents it plain as day in his book without shame.
@@8114梦见 “was my new wife dead on our honeymoon?” is giving “my new toy is broken” like he didn’t absolutely give a shit about HER
It was religiously based, so if course he thinks he's right and the world is wrong.
Chiming in from Germany to let you all know:
At least the German translation of that abomination of a book is banned here and I love that fact.
That's great news! I'm german, too and I was wondering!
Based Germany
I wish it were banned in America. That book doesn't fall under free speech. Its only purpose is to incite people to commit horrible crimes against their children.
Beautiful
@@Alastariana It should be illegal in America. I'm not a lawyer, but I don't think the first amendment protects speech that encourages people to commit crimes, especially against children. It's so discouraging to see that disgusting book available on Amazon.
‘I’m getting into character and imagining I’m an abusive man.” Cracked me up
Grrr. I’m going to…I’m going to…Imma smack you…consensually!
Dang it!
Real men carry around a d20 for intimidation checks.
LOL, FR. 😭 Rachel is so funny.
@@warlordofbritannia Cowards use the scarier d4. If you've spilled a tray of dice while barefoot in a dark room, you'll probably know what's scary about a d4.
I can't get past the honeymoon crabbing story and his "what a silly female!" takeaway. I can't believe he thought that was acceptable enough to write about publicly. Wild.
He truly doesn't care about woman whatsoever
It's also environmental abuse. Why take all those crabs from their habitat to only eat a few of them. Were they feeding an army? This is why there are extinctions and near extinctions.
Dude made his wife cook and walk barefoot until she got her feet hurt, had sex multiple times with her barely if not at all willing, and has the audacity to be "oblivious" (not really, he just doesnt give a shit) about why his wife is breaking down ON THE HONEYMOON.
Like i dont really expect much from a guy that groomed her but fucking hell
He’s a raging narcissist.
Right??? It's making me SO angry
These are my parents lifelong heroes. We don’t interact anymore. Years of therapy and these names still make me feel so so ill. We were family friends of the paddock family, one of the adopted children who was murdered in the name of this shit. My heart breaks every day
Oh gawd, my heart goes out to you. I can't imagine anyone regarding these two awful lunatics as their "heroes"
My parents too 💔 they used to order multiple copies of all their books to hand out to newly married couples in our church
I'm so sorry. I hope you will find the peace you deserve ❤
It's horrible!
Lots of love to you. I wish you peace.
@@joyfichtner2581I was horrified to find my parents have a copy.
The boiling-crabs-on-honeymoon foreshadowing the child training, just so gross. Michael was training Debi from the word go too.
He trained up a child and then married her 🤢
I know; she is a great example of someone who is both a victim and perpetrators of abuse. It’s pretty heartbreaking.
blue bloods is straight up copaganda but one of my favorite quotes about parenthood comes from it, specifically by danny: “we made the choice to bring you into the world, you didn’t make the choice, we did. so a bargain was struck that day that you owe us nothing and we owe you everything.”
Garbage show but this is my philosophy as well.
Being a doormat to an abuser doesn't mean you're making the most of your life. It means you're making the most of THEIR life and letting them get away with shit AT THE EXPENSE OF YOUR WELL-BEING AND TIME AND LABOR
They caused 7 deaths and they are still getting published? That is horrific
They’re basically treating children like Sith Lords
Being "linked to" is rather vague, not the same as causing.
They have a massive self-publishing operation unfortunately 🙃
@@morgianasartre6709They actively taught dangerous abuse tactics to use on children that could absolutely kill a child. An abusive parent who reads their book and implements their methods could feel emboldened to continue. “To Train a Child” is actively encouraging violence against children and is a cause of death 100%. The abusers are the most at fault, but a book that says it’s a good thing to abuse your children and “here are some new tactics” is a direct cause of more dangerous abuse.
@@morgianasartre6709 Hospital paperwork when someone dies has a list of things _linked to_ the death. You might find someone who died of asphyxiation caused by lung collapse caused by perforated pleural membranes caused by thoracic gunshot wound. Each of those is, officially, "linked to" the death. That doesn't mean the gunshot would didn't cause the death.
The fact that my own conservative fundie parents don't like the Pearls *really* says something about the Pearls
mine too HAHA
Same
This honeymoon is a horror movie. Absolutely my worst nightmare.
It makes me mad and sad that some women and girls in this country are told to endure and enjoy being treated this way! Not even on their honey moon are they treated nice! A slave to their husbands from the get go!
@@fehyndana7725 I know! They’re told a wife and mother is all they should ever aspire to be and then they are disrespected (at best) even in those assigned roles. Heartbreaking.
I would've packed my bags and gone home. Then, I would've found a divorce lawyer.
@@kkturtle12 EXACTLY! They pretend their traditional role is honored but by whom? No one respects these women
I forgot how the Pearls are Sith Lords, especially when it comes to “show no mercy, utterly crush your kids.” Raising children should not resemble the Art of War.
The art of war is nicer than this crap. They at least advocate for taking care of your subordinates.
Michael Pearl looks like Santa’s evil twin. Instead of giving presents to kids, he just gives pain and trauma.
I think he’s what Krampus looks like while in human form. I think Krampus is nicer though.
Ironically enough I read Santa as Satan 😂
Their books should be used as evidence against them in court, so they can be help accountable for abuse. So disgusting.
One time at work I said to my coworker “that was such a big yawn for such a little man” because that’s what I say to my pug and it’s been months but I’m still mortified
Next time I see my coworker do a stretch, I am going to be so tempted to say, "Biiiiig cat stretch"
@@JovanDacicI say "ohhh big stretchums" if you're looking for another option 😂
I take care of adults and find myself telling them to "leave it". Or talking to them sternly like I would my dog when frustrated.
When I was deep in the Christian religion (cult) I was gifted a Debi Pearl book by an older lady in our church. “Created to Be His Helpmeet.” She had written and printed out her own study guide on the book as well. Even back then, 11 years ago now, I read it and felt horrified by what was written. It made me so sick that I burned the book in our back yard. It really helped me deconstruct the religion and now I am a happy atheist! The Pearls are disgusting criminals. Thank you for covering them and I hope you take a huge mental health break after this one.
Mostly, I would see books by James Dobson on the shelves in the homes of Bible group leaders, but he is almost as bad as the Pearls. Debi seems to be a victim of him and then later on colluded in abusing as many victims of abusers do later on.
Calling women and girls 'females' is degrading, and it's how misogynists describe them. Normally, honeymooners stay in hotels with full or half board or close to restaurants near by so nobody has to cook.
Two things:
1) Im glad that you do videos that call these monsters out. People STILL reference their "child rearing" methods, and it makes me sick. I aint even got kids, and it makes me sick.
2) Your hair and makeup look especially pretty! You're always lovely, but you're especially so today!
I'm glad you exist and share your time and talents with us.
As I was around 10 years old (extremely dysfunctional, loveless, without any kind of patience-household) I developed severe OCD. My parents sent me to a therapist, wich I maybe saw 5 or 6 times and as I did not get the magical cure from it they thought I would receive, they stopped going there with me. From then on I was abused to instill pain and fear in me to stop my OCD rituals.
My mother beat me up with her bare hands , (turning faucets on and off, turning light switches on and off. etc) house shoes, wet towels, everytime I did a OCD ritual. My father screamed at me everyday because he was stressed by my mother screaming at him and once hit me several times on my shoulder so that I got a giant bruise on it.
What did that teach me? I'm now 36 years old, with OCD, conducting my rituals only when I'm alone and where noone can see me.
Don't. Beat. Your. Kids. These fkin monsters.
You deserved lovingkindness. You sound very clear-minded and sensible.
Conservative Christians: Marriage and family are beautiful. Why shouldn't you aspire to have those things? 😢
Also conservative Christians: If your wife and kids are failing to meet your unrealistic expectations, here are some tips and tricks to treat them like garbage 😁
As someone who grew up in a house of 7 I wouldn’t recommend to have that many children unless you are able to provide for them. My father was the only one that work and sometimes he would just not work. He would just quit working. As we got older we would rarely have more than two meals a day and they were small portions as well. Had mold growing everywhere, roach infestation, letting things go unprepared. We ended up losing our home and had to move into a two bedroom home. My parents got one room and all five of us had to live in the other. It was crowded. The power or water would go out every other month. We got constantly yelled for being “ungrateful “. It got worst when my mother passed I had to become a parent in the home and to make sure we had meals. Sometimes we only had one meal a day and just bananas or almost expired bread for “snacks” .
My education was ruined as well cause I was homeschooled and my mother put in all the work and when she passed my father didn’t enrolled me into the next grades. All of my siblings don’t have a high school diploma.
I have gotten judged for agreeing with my husband we want to wait till we can afford to have a kid or two. Please don’t have kids if you can’t afford it or are willing to put in the work to raise children. Please.
I was one of 10 and while my childhood wasn't as difficult as yours sounds, I definitely agree. We always had food and somewhere to sleep but there were too many of us for them to emotionally invest in any of us as much as we needed and all of us girls have been parentified at one stage or another. I don't know if it's possible to emotionally care for that many kids.
Touching is one of the very first ways little kids use to explore and understand the world, picking objects up and looking at them from different angles is part of the development of sight, and manipulation with the hands builds motor skills and again HELPS US SEE IN THREE DIMENSIONS. Besides the fact beating tiny children is monstrous, denying them the ability to learn from their environment by touching stuff is absolutely MANIACAL 🤬
The thing about the Pearls is that they aren't just advocating punishing your small children for the developmentally necessary act of touching things, they are advocating SETTING UP ESPECIALLY TEMPTING SITUATIONS TO MAKE SURE YOU GET TO PUNISH THEM. It's horrific.
They believe that infants are born with an evil nature. Debi said it out loud.
@@jenniferbrower Then the pair of them should have been sterilised 60 years ago.
I will NEVER understand parents who beat kids as a form of teaching them. That's how ASPD can be created in people. By teaching children 'touching the glass is wrong because you'll get hit' they'll associate touching the glass as bad because it gets them hurt, not that it's wrong because it's someone elses property. So, perhaps later in life when they touch someone elses things and don't get hit, they won't associate it with being wrong. This can extend to them not actually conceptualising a grasp of what is right and wrong due to morality, but rather something being right or wrong because the law simply says so and punishment ensues if they break it.
Absolutely setting children up for faliure.
I just wanna say your explanation of ASPD has just helped me understand it in a much deeper context, and I appreciate it!
Conservatives: Have kids! They are the most important and precious things in the world!
Me: Yes I agree, that is why I am waiting to have them until I can afford a safe and healthy lifestyle for them. I want to make sure to be the best mom I can, before having a baby!
Conservatives: No not like that!
Make it make sense ...
They only want to force children on women/people so that A:
They can be easier to control, and B:
So that these extra children can grow up to be "Christian soldiers", cheap labour, republican voters, or at least white because these ppl are often paranoid about being "replaced" by those scary non white people
Me except for it's that's why I am moving to a country where they will definitely survive to adulthood.
That’s the reason I’m not having them- I struggle greatly with my mental health and feel that due to the habits my parents ended up shoving onto me, among other things, I won’t be able to effectively care for them, ever. No matter how much I want them
Calling children 'the most precious things' is a lie they tell themselves and others. Children to them are soldiers and slaves to be indoctrinated into the cult to continue it's existence. They're also there to serve you now that you're the one in power. It's a truly vile worldview, one that should be worthy of having your kids taken from you, but given how broken child protective services are they likely won't end up in a better situation.
I got legit chills on the crab story. This man is literally the emobodyment of my worst fear that keeps me from dating men (not that I miss it honestly).
Me too. Why be picking all those crabs when you couldn't eat them all before they went off. 'Foragers' like him give serious foragers a bad name.
I can't believe this man wrote a book about abusing his wife with SO LITTLE SELF AWARENESS. How weird women are for being angry when you don't let them sleep, r8pe them, and force them to drag your bag of crabs barefoot (i.e. doing all the hard work while you're enjoying yourself)... He totally wouldn't be furious at a tiny part of all that
If demons were real he would certainly be one.
I want to watch this juicy 3 hour commentary but im not in the right headspace today! Commenting for the algo and ill be back to watch in a few days ❤
I appreciate the fact that you have the emotional intelligence so that you're able to recognize where you're at and to take appropriate measures in order to protect your well-being. Best wishes!
Based
I'm doing the exact same thing
I'm with you today
I've got 8 minutes left and just realized the video is 3 hours long 😳😄
My personal act of self-care: not watching this right now. I will come back to it. I shouldn't watch this in my current mental state and I know this so imma be sensible.
I hope any of you in a similar place takes care of themselves too❤❤❤
It's a very long video which is why I don't watch it all in one go.
child development student here... their justification for blanket training, etc. is sick but it actually is based on child psychology. its just the abusive side of the same coin and they admit as much when they say they're using conditioning! but their children aren't learning to do good, just that they will be punished when they do wrong. ugh. [insert rant about how christianity does this with the idea of hell anyway.]
this shit makes my blood boil. thank you for talking about it rachel, great video as always :)
I’m starting to become triggered by anyone with the name Pearl
LMAO I did not put that together until now 😂😭
Instructions: "Knit three; pearl two."
Student: _{twitch}_
I'm sure this video is going to be horrific but before we get into that just want to say that with your green makeup and red hair your giving off some serious pamela isley (poison ivy) vibes. Looks great hope you don't want to destroy humanity with plants (apart from the pearls they can be composted).
Thank you!! :)
These Pearls don't deserve to be cast before swine, or pitched in the compost. I wouldn't want to insult the swine or the compost by throwing absolute garbage to them.
@@RachelOates ❤
@@JovanDacic true, the pigs might throw them back up
I honestly find horrifying how much the grooming affected Debi's psyche. How much she coerced hersel into accepting, even appreciating abuse. She could have been a smart girl once, and at the start of their marriage when she clearly explained to him what he did wrong and was angry and pouted, there she honestly should have escaped. Debi might have been smart once, but she surely was never brave. And that's a pity. She's stuck forever being the happy victim of a sociopath.
She probably didn’t know there was a different way to live.
@@jenniferbrower Probably, but If that could always be the excuse than humans would never had done any progress. I think that many times some people instinctually know that something is wrong and try to break free of the mold despite everything that society says to them. It's something in their own predisposition. It's bravery, emotional intelligence and stubbornness. Unfortunately, not everyone is like this, and that's why progress is so slow. Especially If you add to the mix emotional and phisical abuse, which stumps many personal progresses a person can make.
@@chichi77timIt isn't as if she was a blank slate before she met him. She came into that relationship pre-groomed by her church and likely her family.
I grew up in the 60's and 70's and even at my Chicago public high school in the 1970's, a girl's track team was perceived as potentially taking resources away from boy's sports. The male sports coaches saw us as a threat. We had no support from the school and relied on the activism of our volunteer coach. This is but one example. But even in this totally secular situation, the misogyny was rampant from those with vested interests in maintaining the status quo.
Where they complain about women being in secret service, because "women are empathetic" - even if it was true that no woman can match no man in the physical aspect of the job (evidently not true, since women do work in these fields), it never even occurs to these people that empathy and emotional skills are actually huge assets in this line of work. Policing, security and intelligence collecting are not all about brute force. The stereotypical feminine 'soft' skills make women very good spies (just like, ironically, the fact that women tend to be underestimated by men!), and there's research showing that the presence of female officers is much more likely to lead to de-escalation of potentially violent situations.
They think the violence is necessary (and they enjoy committing it), they do not want de-escalation sadly
(This comment contains stuff about violence)
My grandpa is 87 years old, and he STILL talks about how his father would beat the s...t out of him and his brothers back when they were kids. Grandpa still talks about neighbours stepping in to stop his father, because they were worried that one of the boys would get horribly injured or worse. 87 years old... and he's clearly traumatised from what happened more than 70 years ago.
Also... my ex was subjected to a lot from his mum, and he kept expressing guilt and fear whenever someone realised it and tried to help him. He would scream apologies in his sleep and wake up exhausted, only to get into a rage of sorts when someone asked him how he was doing. He protected his mum from everyone who seemed negative towards her, and was rewarded with things no person should have to go through. Him apologising to her tomb stone (she had a massive heart attack when we were 18)... him apologising for not being a better son... she failed miserably as a parent. Rumours says that my ex is doing way better now, but I still have those moments where I worry about the possibilty of him one day being like my grandpa: looking back with anger and hurt, unable to work through the trauma.
The Pearls insisting that their way is "Gods way" is infuriating, and it actually makes me question their supposed faith in God. They're actively breaking people, and should be imprisoned for what they're doing. How many of their kids have those nightmares where they're apologizing? How many of them will look back and feel betrayed? Now, to be clear: my grandpa would never raise a hand against another person (let alone a child), and my ex stated time and time again that he wanted to be child free to be sure that the family cycle would be broken completely. The Pearl children? I'm not convinced. Still... who THE F... would raise a hand against a CHILD? The Pearls are just... they need jail. Both Michael and Debi need jail. Throw away their keys. Keep them locked up. They represent evil, and they've failed even harder than what my great grandpa and my ex-boyfriends mum did.
I actually want to make some waffles for my grandpa and show him videos of cute baby goats now (he loves baby goats... and puppies, kittens and the occassional chicken video)
Animals usually bring comfort to the broken. They love so truthfully. Maybe your grandpa needs a little puppy.
1:12:14 I think they’re trying to convince themselves that they’re right. Like Classically Abby was always saying how having kids is so hard and stressful and thankless and isolating but it’s good cause she has achieved a higher level of happiness that doesn’t involve actually being happy
This is definitely something you can see in my next video - I’m only halfway through filming it at the moment and I won’t give away what it is just yet but it’s reviewing a certain book with this basically as its central theme!
@@RachelOates I can’t wait but don’t burn yourself out rushing it
It's so bizarre how fundies can't comprehend poverty. A contracter makes decent money, and they were born into generational wealth.
My guilty pleasure is smart and grounded people doing deep dives on fundie cults 😅
thank you so much for raising awareness and continuing to speak on this!! i remember seeing the “to train up a child” book in my parents’ garage when i was in my early teens and not really knowing what it was, but looking back on it they were 100% following a large amount of the teachings within it…because of this i am now a 23 year old disabled adult with fibromyalgia, chronic migraines, and CPTSD still recovering from an almost 4 year ab*sive relationship that i ended up in due to how i was raised
how anyone can watch the joy and will to live drain from their child’s eyes because of these teachings and still choose to implement them will forever be beyond my understanding
i hope anyone who has gone through this is able to heal and has support from their friends and/ or community ❤️
When I was young, this was a book that was recommended by the church my family attended, and my parents read and used as a guide for raising myself and my 3 siblings. Listening to this video is definitely bringing back some memories I think I had tucked away in a little box.
Also as a kid/teen, I always assumed that I’d use similar punishments and “techniques” when I had kids. Now as an adult the thought of spanking or hitting any of my potential future children is just sickening to me. I remember how awful the skin on skin spankings were, and can’t imagine inflict that sort of intentional pain upon a child.
I've got my vomit bucket ready, let's go! The pearls are the absolute worst that purity culture has to offer, and that's saying something. Yikes, thank you for reading and researching all their nonsense for us.
Vomit bucket is key preparation. I salute such foresight 🫡
Yeah, it took 5 minutes to get the to part where she talks about "claiming" him, an adult, while she was 13. These three hours are going to be rough.
I get that children can pretty easily develop crushes on adults, that happens. Normally they do not end up marrying them.
Training babies obedience out of fear as soon as they are born is dystopian
I don’t understand why they insist on projecting malice onto the actions of babies. They’re not doing things just to hurt you or cause you distress. They’re babies. They just want food, sleep, shelter, and love.
Well they believe that babies are intentional sinners that deserve hellfire until they accept Christ. To them, they believe it actually *is* an internal sinful nature that must be beaten out. Truly sad.
When I was in fundamentalist churches, I would question original sin as I didn't like the idea of every human being born evil. But fundamentalist mothers would say that their demanding babies and toddlers were like the way they were because they were evil, rather than undeveloped, and therefore unable to look after themselves so they were frustrated if their needs weren't met immediately.
Humans are the least developed animal species at birth. Foals and calves are able to walk from birth. It takes a human a year after birth to be able to walk.
@8114梦见 Even crying for food as babies and toddlers means that they are evil according to fundamentalist Christians. So even newborns aren't fed at night and only once every four hours during the day.
“I am an independent, strong willed, bundle of anxiety” 😂😂😂
Total spit take, we need a club
Did I wake up to a 3 hour video on Michael and Debbie Pearl from the amazing Rachel?! Oh, it’s gonna be a GREAT Wednesday!! I’ve been researching a lot of parenting/homeschool videos and fundie parent videos (Miriam Anderson started a cascade effect), and this fits in perfectly! Thank you for doing that emotional work of researching this chaos for us 💙💙
Also, I went to Bible college and my husband I met there (thankfully we’re out now). When we were engaged, the school recommended we buy the pearl’s books to prep for marriage. I bought how to be a helpmeet along with the accompanying devotional workbook, and I worked through those twice before we got married. We also read through to train up a child together and had lots of discussions about how we would raise our children (thankfully we’ve done a complete 180° on our beliefs and our children have no clue about the church because most of them have never been)
I have to translate a 50-question survey from Dutch to French right now so this is the perfect 'actually interesting content I don't have to look at' auditory companion for this afternoon's work.
It is wild to me that you can listen to something in English, and translate from Dutch to French! That's so many languages at once 😂 I can barely listen and work in English 😂
@@thatbtchinthecomments9978 it's actually easier to listen to something in a different language for me because it won't mess with what I'm doing. You ever had the thing where you were typing something but overhear people talking and then you type what they were saying? Or you're saying something and seeing text at the same time and then you end up saying what you read? I have that when I listen to things in the language I'm working in.
@@marlyd I get caught out by my own mind thinking about what I'm going to type next. I'll be trying to type an explanation that "These particular devices have an unfortunate tendency to demonstrate some rather exciting bits of chemistry," and I'll think about whether "aspects of chemistry" is better than "bits of chemistry" and type "unfortunate tenspects" or something like that.
@@marlydIt makes sense that a third language would interfere less than the two you are working with, but I can't even listen to songs with lyrics when doing housework. The cognitive load is too much.
So if your baby really wants to climb stairs, MAYBE use the time you have to watch her, supervise and allow her a chance to try on her own, instead of beating her for being curious and wanting to be active and explore her world!!! I dunno!! Watching my son and what he can do on the playground makes my heart so happy, he has been working on these skills since he could crawl and now he can climb and run and ride a scooter so confidently!
A moment of silence for all the braincells Rachel sacrificed to provide us with 3 hours of debunking this toxicity
Just wow. I have a 3.5 year old son and I TEACH, not TRAIN, him so he can stay safe and be happy. When I tell him No, I explain my reason- usually his safety, or others safety, or socially acceptable behavior. I would never want him to fear me. I want him to understand when I say No it’s because I care about him. I never want him to feel broken or defeated or submissive. I give him as much freedom as I safely can. I love seeing him explore the world and learn new skills. He is so awesome and a shining star. I can’t imagine wanting to break his spirit.
My horrible MIL gave my husband and I To Train Up a Child as a Christmas gift last year with rave reviews of how well it worked for her. She of course hasn’t seen our children since. The crazy thing is she’s not even religious. She just likes beating kids I guess. I knew she was awful, but my husband had blocked out any memories of physical abuse, so I was genuinely shocked.
I saw that book at a thrift store and bought it so nobody else could, the highlighted areas of that book made me cringe
What's crazy is that a lot of elder abuse takes place in nursing homes. You get what you put out in this world. Not advocating for it btw.
I was raised reading their books Preparing to be a HelpMeet and Created to be a HelpMeet in a girls bibles study. The amount of blame that is placed on the women in the relationships is staggering. There is ZERO accountability for the men, and there was a story of a woman who was being physically abused, the moral of that story was that her husband was eventually saved because she stuck around, suffered through it all, and showed gods grace. He never apologized, he just stopped hitting her and they touted her as an angel from above. They don’t support divorce, even if the husband is abusive or a pedo towards the children, you should report him and then visit him in jail. And keep the kids out of reach until they age out of the preferred range. I have been out of my home for almost a decade now, and the entire time I have been in therapy to recover from that bullshit and the abusive relationship I landed in immediately after leaving home due to what I was taught to accept. I took those books out of my parents home the last time I was there so they could not be exposed to my sister.
Omg! Horrific! Also the irony of those fundies giving the men all the rights, power and privilege yet the women get all the responsibility 🤦🏽♀️
The "funny" thing is that they justify their "training" with the claim that if you do this to a very young child, you won´t have to spank them when they are older. But then they nullify their own claim right away. The large amount of instructions on how to beat older kids that their books contain, proves that very obviously.
Oh, and I was already autistic in 1975, and didn´t get diagnosed until 2022...
yeah i was 15 last time my parents "spanked" (abused) me. they will do it as long as they think they can.
I've raised three children by myself, all of which have grown up to be great, and blanket training is a power trip. Blanket training is no different than predators Preying on The weak. You want your children to fear bad actions and disappointing you, not you in general. Blanket training teaches children that you're unpredictable and they should fear you at all times.
8:59 “nothing to contribute” and “non-being” is absolutely dehumanizing. Uh, and yeah. She 100% was “interested in him.”
A NEW MULTIPLE HOURS LONG RACHEL OATES VIDEO! I SHALL USE THIS TO DISTRACT MY ADHD BRAIN WHILE WORKING UNTIL I CAN RECITE EVERY WORD OF EVERY SENTENCE.
no seriously, thank you so much for continuing to get me through everyday life and even the most stressfull exam phases. I really needed something new after rewatching the Bethany Beal videos almost every week since they were uploaded.
heck yeah let's go!!!! Thanks for the content Rachel, love hearing your insights on these things
Important note about Gabriel Pearl: the wife mentioned on the website is his second wife, and the first one has basically been scrubbed from the record. Who knows what happened to her? TO BE CLEAR this should not be anyone else's business, but given the way the Pearls talk about the perfection of their family, it does seem relevant in this case.
We do know that at least some of the Pearl kids aren't legally married to their spouses because ((mumble mumble something about gay marriage?? I don't remember)) so they were married by Michael but don't have state marriage certificates.
Michael would never marry his kids to a same sex person, my guess they are not legally married so that the wife doesn't get any legal rights and alimony if she wants to leave.
Gabriel's first wife probably couldn't stand the abuse anymore and left
@@fehyndana7725I think the gay marriage thing could tie in with them saying that the state has desecrated legal marriage by allowing it, so they will no longer partake. Probably something like that. But I wouldn’t dismiss your guess either… seems highly likely.
thank you for your hard work, rachel. as someone who suffered emotional, physical, and s3xual abuse as a child (and my parents reasoned it to "that's what we knew, that's what i learned"), this topic is close to my heart. rachel, bestie, please take care of yourself well.
Omg I wish this a court case . I swear this is unacceptable why aren't these guys in jail?
It's wild to expect that people should be fine with living far below their means just to have some kids.
This is what happened to the Turpins. They couldn't even cope with a few children as what happened to the eldest child who was at first sent to school. She was sent to school in dirty clothes and unwashed. Don't keep having babies every year if one is too much to cope with.
I'm a single woman (gasp) with two German shepherds. Training is pointless without mutual love and respect. You want your dog to run to you when worried, not away. My dogs come and get me when they want something or find something exciting because they want my approval and for me to know they did good. My oldest is a former shelter dog and I barely even use commands anymore, we have loved each other for seven years and he just knows what I expect from him, and we trust each other blindly. I never even considered hitting him and breaking that trust. Yes, tell them when they do wrong, but treat them well and they will want to do right. There are different ways to raise kids and train dogs but Jesus Christ, fear shouldn't be one of them.
Hi Rachel, just wanted to thank you for always giving the asexual community a shout-out. We get left out of conversations a lot and it's always really nice you make sure we're included.
Ahhh the Autism stuff - cell phones - I am in my late 50's and autistic. There were no cellphones when I was conceived. My sister and I are pretty sure that Dad (born in 1939) was also autistic... Same thing with vaccines - dad had very few vaccines as a kid. And the MMR did not exist when I was small...
I walked down the wedding aisle to a Black Sabbath song 😂
How the possession going? Still enjoying it? ;)
Ah nostalgia the pearls train up a child was the first video i saw from you. I instantly subbed that day. So excited to see you take them down in a eloquent and funny way.
Saw their names and clicked right away because I wonder what atrocities they committed this time🎉
And she was a little girl her family didn’t think that wrong. This is scary
25:51 my husband and I will play around like this. The game is he’s got to get me into the bedroom. HOWEVER I’m always LAUGHING while putting up the struggle. Hell my favorite game is making him chase me for the third kiss (he thinks 3 kisses in a row is good luck). But the screaming comment really puts a bad feeling in my gut, there should be no hint of “I don’t like this”.
I would love to know if children that receive this “training” are developmentally behind (crawling, walking, etc.)… the important months and years of these babies’ lives are filled with fear and being told not to move. I can’t imagine that’s good for any types of development.
The public school thing is heartbreakingly real. I was the only child in my religious family to go to public school, and to this day I am scared to come out to them for fear of that being blamed and therefore limiting the education of future kids in the family. Kids need to be exposed to different kinds of things, or else it's just brainwashing, something they're ironically so concerned about. I would have been aroace whether I knew the word or not.
14:46 holy crap. Could he be less interested in her well-being?
Thank you for putting into words the difference between self focused and selfish...had to pause and rewind so I could write down your definitions there. It's a distinction I've struggled with in the past and have been getting a feel for over the last several years, but you've explained it much more clearly than I've yet to manage. So thanks! ❤❤
Sees a three hour Rachel video: Oh yay.
Sees it's about the Pearls: Oh no.
Love your work Rachel. ❤
Your original video was the first I had heard of these evil people. Thank you for bringing them to the world's attention.
them referencing classical conditioning of any kind as a good method to "train" your child is wild, given that behaviourist methods of teaching in general have long been abandoned as too simplistic. plus, one of the main behaviourist scientists, Watson, and his wife, who insisted on raising their kids according to these rules, SERIOUSLY psychologically damaged them. i just started teacher training and this is part of the first block of pedagogic theory you learn. it is truly basic stuff. what the pearls are saying is not only unbelievably cruel, it's also unlikely to work on anything more complex than "don't do x thing".
Oh they would have HATED having someone like me as a child. I got my butt whooped constantly, difference was i did it knowing id get in trouble and to me, it was worth it to do what i wanted even if i got in trouble. I take my whooping with a smile on my face then immediately do it again. I was unbreakable, i would have literally taken death over being told what to do. My stubbornness knows no bounds. Plus, im sure he wouldnt have liked how i threw all our bibles out the window because i didnt like them and thought they were stupid when i was 5 😂 im proud of little me
I wouldn’t put it past them to have arranged a ‘tragic accident’ for you. Nothing resembling a conscience in either of them.
@@archervine8064 Oh I wouldnt be surprised either. It's not like I was a bad kid, I was just a "tomboy" and "not very lady like" which I know would just be the greatest sin to them. Luckily I wore my parents down and they let me be who I wanted but I doubt i would have gotten that outcome from them. I would not be able to tolerate those people.
Feeling under the weather and working from home today. A 3 hour video will get me through the rest of the working day. 💪
the biggest crime in this video is Rachel uploading a 3 hour video an hour before I have to leave for work :(
Having been in an abusive relationship for a number of years (safely out now), all I can say is this style of parenting sets children up to accept abuse as normal. Being beat doen physically or mentally until you submit by someone who says they do it because they love you? Behind closed doors? Very familiar.
Also - no matter what words you put on it, it's hitting a kid who can't defend themselves and needs you for survival.
Rachel Oates telling horror stories to sleep to
Found Rachel with that first Pearl video. I’m sure they have since learned and become better people 😊
I doubt it
@@mikalcarruthers
Shhhh! No spoilers!
@warlordofbritannia I just finished the video and I really hate these people
Bless you Rachel for reading this and here's hoping you had a palette cleanser afterwards.
This book is basically teaching everyone that if you're bigger and stronger than someone you can do to the weaker person whatever you want. WTF.
So happy to see your gorgeous face!! Sending love from Hobart ❤️❤️❤️
"Only women can be that gentle" //laughs in abused by my grandma//
I hate the "women are inherently gentle" narrative. When I started working customer service, I realized I was terrified of women raising their voices. Thanks mom.
"Raising an autistic child is like being in a prison"- bullsh*t. I was the CHILLEST kid. I could be left alone, reading a book or in my own make believe world for HOURS from a pretty young age. Like, sure, A very high support needs child might be super hard for a parent to cope with, especially if they don't have adequate support and education, but autism is a HELL of a spectrum, we aren't all super difficult boys who throw tantrums and can't talk and act out by screaming and hitting. The fact that so many of us go undiagnosed till adulthood kind of PROVES that many of us aren't difficult. It's not only AFAB folk either, I know a lot of boys who weren't "difficult" enough to get diagnosed as kids, or who had parents who were concerned with their children being "labelled".
Sameeeeee. Straight A student, too awkward to have friends or date, too sensitive to be able to drink, happiest alone outside or with a book.
This comment actually made me ask my Mum what it was like raising me. Granted I wasn't diagnosed until I was 19, we didn't even suspect it until I was 18, but it's because we both knew nothing about the wider autism spectrum. If you look at a list of common signs of autism in girls though, it's almost all relevant for me.
But I did ask her what it was like to raise me and she said I was a pleasure. In her words, she loved the way my brain worked. There were difficult moments, when I was more picky and particular and "weird", but my Mum said that she just accepted that was who I was.
I was a good kid who never misbehaved outside of trying to finish her work past the bell or reading under the desk. I loved cartoons and dolls, even as a teenager. I didn't go out late or do anything I wasn't supposed to. I was just a quirky, dreamy kid who just wanted her life to be peaceful, her grades to be good and her toys to feel loved.
You're right about high support needs kids, I can imagine that would be a different experience. But there are just as many kids like you and I. The autism spectrum is huge and a lot of kids on the spectrum just need some patience, a little understanding and unconditional love, something I was incredibly fortunate to have even if we didn't really know how much I needed it.
@@hollyberry0602 I think you and your mum are the wherever you are equivalent of me and my mum 😆
My parents sung my praise growing up. I was quiet, kept to myself most of the time, followed rules, gained independence at a young age, did well in school and had a small group of close knit friends. My teachers loved me and my parents said I "practically raised myself"
I got diagnosed with ADHD at 16 and autism at 24, my family struggled to accept my diagnoses because of how good I was as a child
As somebody who is big into developmental psychology. They are a disgrace to piaget’s theory of cognitive development, Vygotsky’s theory of social development, Kohlberg’s theory of moral development, and every method they use would utterly destroy a child’s ability to surmount Erikson’s psychocrises. These people are literally doing the opposite of what one would do to properly raise a child. It’s actually kind of impressive how exactly diametrically wrong they are. Sorry, this is a great analysis, but I can’t watch anymore of this video. My mental health must be guarded from shit like this
Thank goodness for Kyra, her adorable little snorts were the perfect punctuation to the waking nightmare of the Pearls. ❤ Please give her a little smooch on her forehead to say thanks for me!
Rachel is my favorite youtuber to listen to while doing art/chores or any other task and i am always super excited when she posts!
Who wants to bet that the homeless man was completely sarcastic and it flew over her head?
As a man on the asexual spectrum in particular demisexual. I always get so frustrated at the people who act like men are sexual creatures all the time. That type of thinking does harm to everybody and allows predators to hide behind excuses.
idk i just feel like as someone who was gender nonconforming and in the american public school system for a very long time, i really can’t suspend my disbelief enough to believe that there was this huge group of non-binary bullies in rural tennessee picking on the local christian youths. kids like that definitely exist out there, i’ve met a lot of trans gay non-binary etc assholes, but they were getting their shit stolen and having stuff thrown at them along w the rest of us. and i went to public school in a pretty urban area, but people were still calling me slurs at 7 in the morning and throwing pencils at my head in the hallways. i dunno man i’m just skeptical about that story. only part of it i find plausible is that there were other teen boys threatening to sexually assault guys as a way of bullying, but those were always the straight guys in my experience. the ones talking about fuckin each other in the ass were the ones calling me slurs at 7 in the morning lmao.
Public School is brutal indeed but it's no secret that fundie Christians yearn for persecution so they can be Martyrs for Jesus and love to tell/invent stories like these 😂
Just clicked on this video and I already know you poured your heart and soul into it. Thank you ❤
I literally just rewatched your review of preparing to be his helpmeet. This Video will be my Entertainment for this evening.
i have never heard of most people you talk about but i'm always SAT for your videos. you do such an amazing research and crearly puts lots of effort in every single one of your videos and i'm really glad for the information you provide! these people deserve to be called out, amazes me they're not in prison