Flaws: Real Ass Talk [Episode 10]
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 1 ส.ค. 2024
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A new Real Ass Talk video where I talk about physical flaws and how I don’t really view them as imperfections.
Leave in the comments something you'd like me to talk about in the next Real Ass Talk!!
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Loneliness? :( , the feeling of not fitting in anywhere NO MATTER what you fucking do?
nilo 1.2 Just find that one person whom makes you feel good about yourself no matter what. And knows you're An amazing person instead of just saying it.
I felt the same for ages and felt like it wouldint get better but then a amazing person walked into my life and for the longest time I felt like no one would be a true friend to me and I would be alone but it gets better I promise you x
this would be a good topic. even in a room full of people i feel lonely because my social anxiety is so bad i can't talk to anyone !!! Great !!! ,__,//
nilo 1.2 Hey! this is just an advice, it kind of help me out and at least I'm somehow happy and I hope it works for you too!
Just don't think that you're lonely , look around you, see how many people live in this world, don't shut yourself and try and talk a little with people you don't know in school (or work , who knows) and if you don't feel secure or you feel awkward , then you can try and talk to people throuhg the internet! on tumblr, on facebook, on whatever social media!! even on games, so be positive, because someday you'll find that someone that will make you happy (it could be a friend or a girlfriend/boyfriend ) and if you feel weird talking to whatever stranger on the internet and fear that they may be bad people, then I'm here, you can talk to me if you want :)
And this isn't just for you, this is for everyone feeling like this
Andrea Mendez thanks Andrea :) maybe if I didn't shut myself off I wouldn't be so lonely? But your right...I have to start putting myself out there..I guess I did this to myself
*Sometimes your "flaws" end up being the best thing about you. Growing up, everyone would make fun of my big eyes & long eyelashes, and I hated it. But now, it's the main feature that my viewers compliment me on. Sometimes people point "flaws" out just because they have nothing bad to actually say about you, whether it's physical or your amazing personality*. I love you all
so being fat is going to be the best about me yeah I doubt it
+Abby Lynn I don't think you're fat! you look like a beautiful, amazing woman! Stay confident ,also hehe I think I'm fat but I embrace it as ways to stay warm in the winter 😂 jk, but I think you're beautiful. 😊😊
+Abby Lynn then improve yourself, strive for what you really want, join a gym, eat healthy, do something that will make you feel better about yourself
big eyes and long lashes are amazing 😍
I too have a big forehead, I'm super pale, my hair is thin, my lips are thin and I have acne but I can still look in the mirror and genuinely think I look pretty. What personally helped me obtain self acceptance was... bodybuilding! I used to be like most girls, constantly trying to get smaller and then one day I had a radical idea that I wanted to grow my muscles. Overcoming the fear of weight gain and learning to accept my body through the fat "bulk" stage and the lean "cut" stage extended to the entirety of myself. It's important to appreciate yourself, I would say that is key to accepting yourself. Appreciate your uniqueness and what your body can do
Bri I really like your story! and I also think that its cool that there is someone else who used to look in the mirror and be like "no" but now genuinely finds themselves pretty. I used to HATE my body and the way I looked, but over time, I just started telling myself, ya know what? You're hot af. and eventually I started to believe it. But anyways, go you for working and being happy with yourself ^.^
That's fucking great. People with self confidence is awsome in my opinion as long it's not overly
annoying
+Bri really? you look very beautiful
this comment is everything I am
I agree 100% with what Destery said. No-one should have to change the way they are to be loved and accepted by others. If someone doesn't want to be friends with you or doesn't want to date you because of whatever 'flaws' you have, that's not the sort of person you want to be hanging out with anyway.
Don't feel bad about your flaws. Own them, because they're yours.
Very well put :)
This helped me a lot as I have people all ways pointing out my weight.
If you can't accept your flaws then maybe find someone who can and they might be able to help you see the beauty in yourself. :)
*in dramatic narrator voice*
And so, the search begins ...
Like "Let me love you" by Ne-Yo
Jack Crespin The problem with that is finding that person lmao
Marry me.
I used to look at myself in the mirror and see all my flaws and hate myself for it, but then I realized that when I went out and saw other people's "flaws", I found them all attractive. I fall in love with people's smiles, hair, shape, size, laughter, teeth, stretch marks, scars, faces, etc., especially when they're not considered "perfect" in society's standards. Your flaws make you different, and call me cliche, but I believe being different is the most beautiful thing in the world. I love my flaws, because they make me unique.
I liked that he said that if we didn't have flaws, and we were all perfect then we would have nothing to change, and things will be constant/boring. Also I think the fact that, we as humans always had a image in our mind of the perfect being, or the perfect body. Perfect is different to everyone, and your waste-line, or what people say shouldn't determine how much you should love yourself, be confident in who you are! Which is hard for me, and for everyone but someday we will achieve :-) Love you Destery !!
The problem is when everyone makes fun of you because of your flaws you will eventually start hating these flaws and in the end hating yourself
The people in my environment always make fun of me because of my flaws and even my family does it and that hurts me because i thought a family should help and be there for each other and not making fun of you like everyone else
I always try to accept myself but i cant as soon as i see my reflection i start hating myself again and i dont like it because it stops me from being my real me :/
Des youre forehead is perfect the way it is it make it looks like you have a superbrain ^^
Miriam I'm in the exact same situation and i hate it so much! i get the most hate on my flaws from my family i feel like . So i feel you girl!
I always got made fun of too because I have scars all over my face from a rare skin disease, and for a long time I believed I was hideous. But I was also around terrible people for most of my life. When I grew up and moved to a different state, I got real friends that told me how awesome I am and that they didn't even notice after a while how I look because my inner beauty made me more beautiful on the outside. I'm sure you have good qualities in you too that can shine through. :)
ashleyxofashions aw I'm sorry that you felt that way :( people are so vain sometimes like what's on the inside isn't all there is to a person. I bet you're beautiful inside and out :)
If it makes anyone feel better I don't care what you look like or if I dont know you I still like you no matter what!!!!!!!!!! And remember perfect is boring!!!!!!!!!!❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Amanda Gesouras i hope one day everything will turn out fine until than let me tell you youre perfect the way you are :)♥
Can you do your next video on Anxiety?
YAAAAAS
Karkat Vantas Anxiety in general or from social situations and stuff like that?
Yass!! I was just about to suggest this!!
Nathan did one on anxiety :)
YES PLEASEEE
*high fives back to destry :D
This video is fantastic. This is, in fact, real ass talk. People should accept their flaws and I'm so happy you make a video about this.
I never really became conscious on my flaws before, I never spent hours trying to think of the perfect outfit (I try to look decent, but I mever tried to be the most fashionable), I never tried to spend hours doing my hair and makeup, I accepted myself truly, but there was this point in my life where I felt the need to tell the person I liked that I liked him, that is in fact my best friend. I confessed to someone I liked for over a year and been friends with him for 8 years, and when things started to get awkward and our friendship slowly drifted away, I started thinking so much about my physical appearance. "He said no because I'm ugly" "he said no because I'm overweight" "he said no because I get too comfortable at times and act crazy" all those conclusions clouded my mind, making me become so scared to go out and be the person I am. Even with supportive friends, I still get so anxious about the person I was, is, and will be. People of this society keep on blabbering on how proud I should be of myself when they're simutaniously pointing out my flaws. People are hypocrites.
Shoutout to those of us with 15 mile foreheads.
Btw I didn't notice any of Des's flaws except the forehead, probably because mine is big too so I notice those things.
And poopy eyes are awesome. They remind me of wolves' eyes.
I struggle a lot with my body. I tend to not like to see my reflection I can't stand it. The same reason why I barely take pictures of myself. I love helping people with their problems..but when it comes to me I'm all fucked up. Like if someone is hating themselves saying "I'm ugly, I'm worthless." I'd tell them "You are beautiful and perfect in every single way." But here I am hating myself. Sometimes I may say I'm okay..but when it comes down to the truth I'm really not. I'm usually never truly happy. I may laugh and smile. But in the inside I feel broken. I feel..uncomplete. Like something is missing. When I'm breaking down, I lie and say it's about something else. But it always comes down to it being about my body. One of the things I'm supposed to love the most..but I hate it dearly..
I feel the same, and i feel everybody does it at some point in their lide im sure it will stop soom.
Im in the same situation as you. I hate myself, i struggles with depression and social anxiety. i dont know who i really am and feel like ive lost my identity. Everyday when i see people being happy and be able to socialized. I wonder how it feels like to be happy and being able to make new friends.
When i look into the mirror and i saw my flawed sometimes i cried. I feel ashamed of myself, id rather wear a paperbag.
Thanks for doing this. There is a lot of youtubers that dont talk to the viewers and its all about them. You are truly inspirational.
These videos honesty give me joy.. I haven't watched all of them (need to catch up!) but whenever I do, they always make me smile from ear to ear. What you do is amazing Destery thank you from all of your supporters
You know, I think Destery having that big ass forehead is pretty fucking cool. First off, imagine him with a "regular" sized forehead... Just like Brendon Urie, it wouldn't work out too well. Second of all, if he ever wanted to cosplay as Harry Potter, he wouldn't have a tough time putting that lightning bolt shit on his forehead. (I've never really seen the movies so, idk if that has a name or whatever) But seriously though, his forehead is fucking awesome and I appreciate the shit out of it.
Hey Destery, could you make a video on social pressures, like talking to people, asking people out, and performing in social situations, etc? I'm REALLY awkward, and anything you could say would be great :)
Also, something I always used to do was to write all of the flaws I could think of on a board. That way, I could always know that they were out somewhere and I wouldn't constantly have think about them, then as I worked on them, I would slowly erase them one at a time.
***** I don't actually lock myself anywhere. I just make a concerted effort to socialize and be in social situations, then I hear down the line that a bunch of people hate me or think there's something off about me. I actually used to be super confident, but when people consistently trash you in a place like school. I wouldn't describe myself as scared, but rather logical. If people hate you when you're confident in yourself, the best way to preserve your social status is to not be particularly socially active. That's why I asked for performance tips
Maheegan god I HATE when that happens, just.... rejection. By your peers
My biggest flaw I was struggling with were scars I have on my face, and my weight. But I've taken my life back now! I used to be over 300 lbs and I got made fun of constantly. But I've worked really hard at changing how I eat and exercise and I've lost 133 lbs now and it's still going down. And I'm tall so that helps. I just wanna say that you can make a change if you really want to and there aren't extenuating circumstances stopping you. I'm still trying to accept the scars, but I'm actually becoming proud of myself for once in my life.
God I love you Destery. Thank you for reminding me that my flaws are just what makes me my own person because I think everyone needs a person to tell you that once in awhile
please please please talk about the friendzone...
where are you? are you okay?
made me cry because it made me see that maybe I need to realize were only human and need to accept who we are as individuals
This is definitely my favorite Real Ass Talk so far. I'm so glad you started this series I love seeing this side of you!
can you do your next video on anxiety? or self harm and suicide?
people with brown eyes are the nicest kind of people. I would know my girlfriend has them.
Quafflez Show-off ;) hahaha
Beta Whaat!? nooo. mee? i coulda said myself ya know!
Quafflez Haha i know it was a joke
Hey I didnt say all of em xD
Quafflez Hahah "Oh yeah that Hitler kid, what is he up to now?"
"Well hes ummmm Head of some "fittness" camps"
I can't express how much I love watching your videos.
I get quite pumped when I see a new video show up in my subscription box, so thank you for that.
And I have many flaws that I've learned to accept over the years. And even still, I'm at the point that I don't see them as flaws, I see them as assets. I love myself.
I've learned to be kind to myself as well as others. And I know that most people would rather be in pleasant company than a negative Nancy.
I have self confidence issues too sometimes. My hair is thin, my skin is pale, my spine isn't straight. I personally think I'm fat and ugly. But I'm working on it and I can now say that I love my body more than I did like 6 months ago. And your videos help me so much, because i have severe depression and anxiety. Your videos help me smile and keep me strong. Thank you and I love you so much. Also I'm the girl who suggested self harm on twitter btw. Keep doing what your doing 👍
When the fuck did having brown eyes become a flaw?!
Because pretty much every time there's a "pretty eye" contest , brown eyes never win. Plus almost everyone thinks colored eyes are better.
One of the most attractive things ever to me are quirky teeth (think Ezra Furman) ^///^
Issy is Awkward Ayyye gerard
thanks pete Pickle Gee meets Hesitant Gerard I love this
Issy is Awkward Yay reunited and feels so goood
Gerards!!! So many Gerards!
YASS EMO CLUB🙌🏻
this video actually made me cry. When youre someone that has grown up bullied and made fun of, you see the flaws as clear as day. and for the past 6 years I've been trying to accept them. its hard for people to do so like me.
This video made me cry and opened my eyes. Thank you, Destery
I think your forehead is beautiful
This made me really freaking happy and I couldn't agree more with Destry. If people didn't have flaws, people wouldn't be unique. I absolutely love the things that are different on each person. Whether it's stretchmarks, birthmarks, freckles, anything that makes you YOU - I love it all. They make you perfectly imperfect. I wouldn't have it any other way - flaws are there but in my eyes they are just personalized accessories. Wear em proudly guys.
Thank you so much for all that you do. I don't know what else to say other than that and how much these videos help me. I know that this isn't very long or meaningful, and you probably won't see or respond to this, but please know that you are truly amazing and manage to gradually break down the walls of depression for so many people including me. I love you, Destery, please keep doing what you are doing.
Love this video so much, you helped me a lot because sometimes even my family judges me, like a few days ago I was wearing these new clothes that I bought and I thought that I looked really cute in them but when I went downstairs my mom was like "you look so skinny, you should eat more" and I just felt really bad, but thanks for uploading this video it really made my day :)
I love these videos!! They are sooo relatable and hit home. I've struggle with myself and my appearance for years. I always have to give myself pep talks before a new challenge in life. Knowing and accepting your flaws in sooo important and I'm so happy you made a video about them, like you said we ALL have them. This video brought me to tears (in a good way)!!! Please keep making these! PS I love brown eyes 😍
Your talk videos are really supportive and inspiring. You have changed the way I see the world... And that's a good thing. You've showed me how to accept me for who I am. Your amazing and hilarious. Thank you so much for doing these videos:)
Embrace what makes you different :)
"Wear like armor, and it shall never be used against you"
i just want to thank you for taking time to actually make these videos that helps alot of us to improve and accept ourselves :) you know most youtubers are more into entertainng us, making us laugh or just telling us about their day and making it relatable (which is all awesome) but you're actually taking time to just talk to us directly (well through the screen but you get what i mean) and trying to help us fixing our problems and teaching us to handle our flaws, if it's depression, bullying or other stuff and i don't know many youtubers who does that :)
thank you for actually beign there for your fans
This video has actually helped what ive been struggling with for a long time, really like this series. Cant wait to see your next vid
Thank you so much for making this video
This video helped me a lot. I've never had friends point out my flaws or act negative towards me because I was overweight or having emotional issues (they would always try to help me) but when it's your parents then it's extremely hard to get past your flaws. My mom isn't happy if I'm a little overweight or if I don't smile as much and that kills me. And whenever I went to my dad for help, every word I told him was completely bull crap to him. As if I was lying to get attention. For about a year and a half (maybe more), I never looked in the mirror because I hated what I saw and I always had to fake my happiness in order to keep my mom happy. But I'm learning to love myself enough that what she has to say doesn't affect me and I'm not going to let her get in the way of my happiness. I haven't been truly happy in 7 years and I'm ready to change that by truly and wholeheartedly accepting myself. THANKS DESTERY!! You really helped a lot
These videos always help so much. Thank you Destery
thank you Destery, these talks really brighten my day :)
The people who point out your flaws just want to feel better about their own flaws that you might not think are that bad but they think it's horrible. So just don't let it get to you and always remember how awesome you are
I just want to say that I absolutely love these real talk videos! It's like 4 in the morning and i can't stop watching these. They're so insightful, I'm almost crying. hahah . you always put things into prespective. :D Thank you so much!!
I love you. I'm so glad you've been a part of my life these past 5 years
These videos mean a lot thank you so much des its awesome you do this! ❤
You made me smile :) I've been feeling really sad lately and idk why...thanks for this I really needed it
Thanks so much, I was also thinking about my flaws in the past couple days, mainly personality flaws instead, because looks matter, but being a good hearted person is what makes other people want to continue being friends. My best friend put it really well..."I've seen all sides of you, and you are simply...human." And there's nothing wrong with that. Lastly, Destery, please don't be down on yourself concerning your flaws...I have half of them but it's still part of who I am. And I know other folks like who you are, flaws and all. Hugs and have a great week!
You're right everyone has their flaws. I have mine it's mostly on my body. I feel like people can see right through my soul sometimes. But hey I don't care what they think. I am who I am. Like you said when someone else points out what you see. You just have to accept it and whatever. I know when my dad pointed out that I was gaining weight I said hey I'm happy but you're right I do need to make healthier choices. Des you're awesome I'm so glad you make these videos. You're changing people's lives everyday. Thank you!
"My eyes are poop brown which sucks" Oh god that made me smile because same
Destery always knows what to say. These real ass talks were such a great idea and they help a lot.
I legitimately love these video's.
These videos help so much, I've been struggling so much with my flaws lately. Recently, I've been feeling more insecure than ever. Perfect timing :)
I think it's also important to remember that whatever you think your flaws are, someone else might think they're absolutely beautiful about you. My best friend always tells me to not be so down on myself and that I'm perfect. I tell him the same things whenever he's not too happy with something about himself. It's always interesting to hear someone's opinion that's vastly different from yours, but it just takes time to find those special people who celebrate you for all that you are.
Needed to hear this. Love these videos Destery
I HEARD THAT PORTER ROBINSON OMFG YES also this moved me so much I've been working really hard on accepting myself for who I am recently and this just added to my motivation to really think positively and love myself more :) thank you so much for making this!
This made my day thanks Destery!
Destrey! Yayyy! Every Time your video comes up into my subscription box I get so emotional
This helped me a lot actually. I've struggled with insecurities for a long time and this just gave me a new perspective. Thank you. ☺️
This made me so happy, thank you.
Thank you for that, got some real ass thinking to do.. You're my favorite TH-camr honestly😭❤️
Thank you for making this video. It has helped me in more ways than one. Keep on keeping on! xx
Love you des! Always be comfortable with who you are
Thank you for making this video Destery! I've been having self image issues a lot lately. Love you, thanks for being your lovely self. (:
this video just made my day :) I've always been self conscious about myself which made me shy around people and socially awkward, and I just feel like that's not the real me. Around my VERY close friends I'll be completely crazy and do some really stupid shit haha but when I meet new people I just sit there and think "wow I wish I could just talk to them because they seem really cool". I always compare myself to the people who are outgoing and make friends super easy but this video gave me the courage to not try and hide my flaws because everyone has them and they make me who I am and if people judge my flaws they are the people who I shouldn't be around in the first place. Thank you so much
Thank you des for helping though so much in making these videos ive been able to come out of my shell and be more of me
Flaws aren't really thing that you think are ugly but actually give you character, it shows who you really are and if you get made fun of for one of your “flaws" reply back “ at least it gives me character and shows who I really am, not something you want me to be." That is what I would do and yes I do have flaws but I sometimes except them but other times I look down on myself and go to my friends and not my “friends" I mean my true friends who care about me......there's my advice and my word on this video :) I really liked it
Thank you so much des this helped me so much and now I see that flaws are what make everyone unique and we shouldn't be ashamed of them
Des, I just love you so much. Thank you for everything you do, everything you have done, and everything you will do!
Everyone has flaws and imperfections,that is what makes you so unique. I love these videos Destery :)
I've come to conclusion that most of the best video ideas come from when you're in the shower.
And I loved this video, I can relate to it and it helped a lot too.
Really loved this video. Sometimes I really hate my imperfections :(. As for your flaws.. You don't have any! I think you're perfect!!!
I love your video! They are so inspiring
You are so right flaws are everywhere and they do make you feel like the ugliest human being in the planet. I would know because I am so hard on myself about everything. I believe that everyone goes through a time where they feel like they have the worst flaws ever. I think everyone should remember that they are not the only person who is going through issues. I thought I had the worst acne in the world when I was 12 and I just had a minor case of it. I saw someone else with worse acne than me and I thought to myself I'm not the only one and it could be worse. Now at 23 I hardly get acne and I am very knowledgable about how to take care of my skin the right way. Flaws are always there to make you better to make you original they make you yourself and people need to accept themselves and not be trying to be someone else.
Your advice makes my life so much better.
Destery i love you iv been following you for years! You really are an inspiration. You should do a video about being very lost and not knowing who you are, having a fragile sense of self even though you might not have advice for that because you seem very sure of who you are as a person!
Thanks Destery, this helps a lot. Love you.
So far this is my favorite one of real as s talks he's become way more mature topics are real and bloody encouraging, I have many flaws and it sucks but as destery said im starting to accept the things I can't change im happy that Im not alone its so hard to stay strong sometimes
des stfu
your so amazing
like seriously
i love you so much and dont ever lose hope
You are an amzing person. You make me laugh so much on WTF news. Your main channel videos have helped me overcome so much. I would just like to thank you for saying the things you do
Please keep doing these videos! They are so inspiring and it makes me realize things I wouldn't have if I didn't watch it. You keep me happy and I can't ask for anything else ☺️ I love you!!!!!!!!11!!1!!1!1!1!1
Thanks so much for this video!! Reminded me why I subscribed in the first place 😁 I love the Real Ass Talk series so much!
This is unbelievably inspiring. You're perfect Destry 💕 and I absolutely adore all of your videos. They ALWAYS make my day. Keep doing what you're doing ;3;
Thank you so much for making this video. I love you Destery :)
You may have already spoken about this, but I think you should do a part 2 of Flaws. And talk about the flaws that aren't physical. Like how we always beat ourselves up over how we may not be good enough, or this thing I did isn't what I wanted, or living with regrets. Just the sort of internal flaws that we beat ourselves up for. I would really enjoy that video. And also, thanks for making these Real Ass Talk videos. I think that they are helpful, and even if there are things that I don't agree with you about, I'm still looking at it through a different perspective and that is important. So, please keep up your good work. I'll look forward to future videos
Great video Des!! Self acceptance is tuff, you always have something you don't like about your body or personality, and it takes years of developing to accept who you are (im half way through and im 19)
All your fans are so damn supportive mainly because you are a freakin genius OK?!
Thank you... everyone should feel perfect in their own way.
Stay beautiful. ..
thank you so much CapnDesDes, this video really helped me. i love all these videos they mean so much that you care about these topics and care about your fans and viewers enough to do them. you really are a great person. :) and that one person who gave this video a thumbs down is an idiot. high back to you destery! i would also give you a big hug and a big squeeze if i could. keep up the awesome and inspiring and hilarious videos!
Another great videos. I used to be very appearance oriented, but only towards myself. I judged myself harder then I should've and I was constantly down about it until about a month ago. I started watching your videos more and I started having a mind set that was more along the lines of "I'm a good person, and my looks don't matter as much as my character and personality and how I act" and my life has been so much better and easier. I'm confident and I haven't felt depressed or suicidal in weeks. I'm making better friends, and really life is just more enjoyable. Basically what I'm saying is thanks, because without your videos I'd probably still be depressed and I'd probably still hate myself.
i really needed this today. thank you
I cried a bit watching this. But thank you, it was beautiful. And you are beautiful.
Not gunna lie when I saw this video I immediately thought back to Shane's video about Flaws from 2008... Love you Destery
I always really wanted to start a TH-cam series like this one but I never really got to it, but your Real Ass Talks are great, keep it up
This is such an awesome series and keep doing more and you should do one on break ups and how to get over them and you could give like some tips to get over the person faster. i haven't seen an advice video on that.
Self-acceptance is something I've had difficulty with and this was a really good video for me :) thank you for making this!
Just what I needed today thank you so much