🤨I am a married Catholic who struggles with SSA. I have found great comfort through so many wise testimonies on YTube that I am not defined by my attractions. But the dialogue in this video I find troublesome as it flirts with just the thought being a sin. It is easy to sit with earphones and a casual suit on and pass on these proclamations. But is real work to live every day and try to keep yourself together thru the tasks of daily life and temptations. Judge not lest ye be judged.
I think you missintepreted the question. I am a same sex attracted person which does not mean I lust over anyone because in my case, It is NOT sexual desire, it is emotional connection towards another woman. I am Celibate, living my life according to God but this attractions do not go away and you cannot condemn someone becuase they fond someone beautiful because Jesus gave us the Freedom to ignore that temptation and follow Him.
Well, this is interesting. My church basically ignores (or reinterprets) James 1:14-15 and is saying that same sex attraction in and of itself is "indwelling sin that must be repented of and put to death." They point to passages like Romans 1:24, 26 and note how God gave them over to their desires.. while I do feel these temptations are a product of the fall and original sin, and reflect the fallen state of mankind, I personally am with Owen on this one, not exactly Gavin. I don't think saying "that man (or that woman) is attractive" is looking at them lustfully, or bedding them in your mind. This has been a hard time struggling with same-sex attraction, and knowing that is just .. a bit helpful? I mean, now with all of these liberal churches that don't force celibacy or being forced to marry an opposite sex partner, it's been an even harder choice. But at the same time, I'm glad that there are many conservative churches who do not believe the attraction in and of itself is a sin (though they believe that indulging fantasies, etc. is.) I'm just sorta afraid theyre gonna send me to conversion therapy ngl
This is an interesting perspective. However. I think that you might be assuming that both opposite sex attraction and same sex attraction are rooted in the same core psychological desire: intimacy and sexual activity. That desire is certainly present in most healthy opposite attracted people, but I think the roots of same sex attraction (SSA) are a bit different. Now, I am going to speak on male SSA (female SSA has many more layers and much more complexity). The testimonies of thousands of men at Living Hope Ministries and the Breakthrough Clinic would suggest that male SSA at its core is a desire for the guy to find acceptance and (nonsexual) affection from men he perceives as strong and masculine. Likely, the same sex attracted men grew up without receiving or perceiving much affection and affirmation from their fathers and male peers. All boys need those things. That desire for male affirmation will continue to play itself out until it is genuinely met, and it can only be met through (nonsexual) attention from and friendships with strong male role models. I would say that SSA becomes sinful when the person misinterprets it and fixates on it as being an urge to have sex with the object of their attraction. Essentially, male SSA at its core is just a longing to meet a basic childhood need for masculine love. Simply trying to pray away the SSA will probably not work. Yes, God could immediately make someone's SSA go away, but He probably will not. Instead, He often lets people with male SSA work through their underlying issues (male detachment and gender insecurity) as a work of faith, and their SSA often dissipates on its own. Now, I am not going to claim that what I have said about the causes of SSA is 100% guaranteed to be true. It relies on tons of anecdotal evidence and some peer reviewed studies, but it is what I have come to believe as true, given my understanding of God's design for masculinity and femininity.
Hello , i wanted to ask you something, What if you kiss someone of the same gender on the lips and dont have sex with them or plan to marry them? Is that still a sin? (To kiss someone of same gender)
The act of kissing itself is somewhat ambiguous. In some cultures, it is completely normal to greet others (even those of the same gender) with a kiss without there being any romantic connotation. The questions I would pose are: What is the motivation for kissing? Is it a greeting? Is it simply affection and not romantic? Would kissing the other person lead to infatuation for either individual? Motives have to be taken into account when thinking about if something is sinful.
I feel like Gavin's and Owen's answers came across very differently from each other. Even though they acknowledged each other to be on the same page. I'm not sure I agree with the way Gavin put it. It came across like he was saying being a SSA person is wrong in itself (as if you could switch it off and be normal), rather than just believing the aspects of control such as lust or action is wrong.
im with you sam, it feels like theyre saying different things. maybe he just said it in an unclear way, but in my opinion he said it like saying "this guy is attractive" is sin when saying "this girl is attractive" is not sin
at the core of same sex attraction is a "wound" that is not sinful persay, it needs to be addressed. lust is clearly a sin and we have a sinful nature. But in Christ our old identity is gone and our new identity is as saint. we need to see love in Christ as grace in various forms through HIS BODY THE CHURCH. no one changes in a vacuum. meetting the core need of acceptance, attachment, modeling healthy gender roles is only possible because of the blood of jesus but also because he GIVES SPIRITUAL GIFTS TO THE BODY in various forms. Sexuality inside of Christ is not a "sin repentance" issue necessarily it is a disconnected from grace issue. THE CHURCH misses the boat in that it misses the teaching of the one another commands.
Yes! Great comment! I think much of the church forgets that although we are Christians we are also humans with basic emotional needs. The attachment theory perspective really sheds light on how SSA comes to be.
Well obviously ChristianFocus’s view is Christian Focus’s view. However, to the others homosexuality is neither immoral nor amoral. The idea that we have a divine creator who would create homosexuals to only then cast homosexuality as spiritually wrongful is absurd. For God’s sake have a rich and powerful relationship with the Divine but better rescue your sanity and common sense from the boneheads who prescribe that “it’s ok to be thirsty but you mustn’t drink!”
every christians purpose is to learn to walk in the grace of god and love that out in context of christian relationships with the church. if straight men see ssa men as "Sinful" and needing to repent this will only drive them away. the need is to affirm their identity as Saints, and men among men whom are all broken and imperfect on some level. Access to mature consistent mentors is a must to resolve "Attachment loss". SSA is a reflection of a broken culture as much as it is an individuals sinful nature. you cannot address this issue without addressing the context of family they grew up in and creating a new safe healing context by which people can emmerge and discard their defense mechanism with safe accepting masculine rolemodels.
"if you asked me, i would give you living water" jesus calls out the faith and Assertion of the woman at the well. who was probably shamed in culture and hiding from people by being at the well in a time of day when no one else would be there. in the same way those with same sex attraction have a core shame that fuels the same sex compulsion according to Dr. Joseph Nicolosi. see his video "Shame and attachment loss" "shame based self statement"
:( This video may be leading people astray. It is not a sin to be attracted (if you haven't chosen or willfully fostered the desire), it's a sin to act on that attraction. As with any sin, God wishes to forgive us if we seek forgiveness and reconciliation with Him and to amend our life. I have studied moral theology, spiritual theology, and Theology of the Body, have read books, and listened to many talks from a Catholic Christian perspective and am saddened by this video. @Ad1 I'm not sure exactly what spurred your comment but you are a beloved child of God, loved into existence.
hey pluto, I also experience similar hatred for myself, when I love God deeply and yet also love my partner (same sex) deeply, and find it hard to reconcile the 2. For most days I wish I didn't exist in the first place, why put me through so much agony in life, feeling like a total failure sinning against God, yet at the same heartbroken at the thought of having to leave my partner. I know it is really hard, and listening to "sermons" like this video where preacher speak without tact and empathy just makes it feel harder to live another day. But I want to assure you that through my years of struggle with the Lord (even to the point of depression), God has revealed more of Himself and His heart, His unconditional love, His daily encouragement, daily comforting through His Holy Spirit, and guidance, in a deep and personal way that I would never have other experience have not I been made to struggle with this issue. I want to assure you that our Lord our God is good, He embraces us just as we are, and picks us up everytime we fall and feels like shit. The Lord your God knows your pain and struggle, He is not a mean judgemental God but a loving one and He is with you even during the hardest, darkest, bleakest time of your live when you can't see what's ahead.. Do not give up my brother/sister. Trust His heart when you can't see His hand. I am still leaning on Him daily for strength and guidance, and may He himself lead the both of us in the way everlasting.
please don’t listen to these people, being gay is ok. you don’t have to live a life of misery. please stay strong, there are so many people who support you.
🤨I am a married Catholic who struggles with SSA. I have found great comfort through so many wise testimonies on YTube that I am not defined by my attractions. But the dialogue in this video I find troublesome as it flirts with just the thought being a sin. It is easy to sit with earphones and a casual suit on and pass on these proclamations. But is real work to live every day and try to keep yourself together thru the tasks of daily life and temptations. Judge not lest ye be judged.
I think you missintepreted the question. I am a same sex attracted person which does not mean I lust over anyone because in my case, It is NOT sexual desire, it is emotional connection towards another woman. I am Celibate, living my life according to God but this attractions do not go away and you cannot condemn someone becuase they fond someone beautiful because Jesus gave us the Freedom to ignore that temptation and follow Him.
Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death. - James 1:15
@@Brandonson80 howdy hi, yes
Well, this is interesting. My church basically ignores (or reinterprets) James 1:14-15 and is saying that same sex attraction in and of itself is "indwelling sin that must be repented of and put to death." They point to passages like Romans 1:24, 26 and note how God gave them over to their desires.. while I do feel these temptations are a product of the fall and original sin, and reflect the fallen state of mankind, I personally am with Owen on this one, not exactly Gavin. I don't think saying "that man (or that woman) is attractive" is looking at them lustfully, or bedding them in your mind.
This has been a hard time struggling with same-sex attraction, and knowing that is just .. a bit helpful? I mean, now with all of these liberal churches that don't force celibacy or being forced to marry an opposite sex partner, it's been an even harder choice. But at the same time, I'm glad that there are many conservative churches who do not believe the attraction in and of itself is a sin (though they believe that indulging fantasies, etc. is.)
I'm just sorta afraid theyre gonna send me to conversion therapy ngl
This is an interesting perspective. However. I think that you might be assuming that both opposite sex attraction and same sex attraction are rooted in the same core psychological desire: intimacy and sexual activity. That desire is certainly present in most healthy opposite attracted people, but I think the roots of same sex attraction (SSA) are a bit different. Now, I am going to speak on male SSA (female SSA has many more layers and much more complexity). The testimonies of thousands of men at Living Hope Ministries and the Breakthrough Clinic would suggest that male SSA at its core is a desire for the guy to find acceptance and (nonsexual) affection from men he perceives as strong and masculine. Likely, the same sex attracted men grew up without receiving or perceiving much affection and affirmation from their fathers and male peers. All boys need those things. That desire for male affirmation will continue to play itself out until it is genuinely met, and it can only be met through (nonsexual) attention from and friendships with strong male role models. I would say that SSA becomes sinful when the person misinterprets it and fixates on it as being an urge to have sex with the object of their attraction. Essentially, male SSA at its core is just a longing to meet a basic childhood need for masculine love. Simply trying to pray away the SSA will probably not work. Yes, God could immediately make someone's SSA go away, but He probably will not. Instead, He often lets people with male SSA work through their underlying issues (male detachment and gender insecurity) as a work of faith, and their SSA often dissipates on its own.
Now, I am not going to claim that what I have said about the causes of SSA is 100% guaranteed to be true. It relies on tons of anecdotal evidence and some peer reviewed studies, but it is what I have come to believe as true, given my understanding of God's design for masculinity and femininity.
Hello , i wanted to ask you something,
What if you kiss someone of the same gender on the lips and dont have sex with them or plan to marry them? Is that still a sin? (To kiss someone of same gender)
Wow you hit this on the nose 💯🙏🏾
The act of kissing itself is somewhat ambiguous. In some cultures, it is completely normal to greet others (even those of the same gender) with a kiss without there being any romantic connotation.
The questions I would pose are: What is the motivation for kissing? Is it a greeting? Is it simply affection and not romantic? Would kissing the other person lead to infatuation for either individual?
Motives have to be taken into account when thinking about if something is sinful.
well then how does one repent of it?
Wise counsel. Amen.
jesus with the woman at the well is the model for grace as a context to address the truth about ones past sexual sins or temptations.
I feel like Gavin's and Owen's answers came across very differently from each other. Even though they acknowledged each other to be on the same page. I'm not sure I agree with the way Gavin put it. It came across like he was saying being a SSA person is wrong in itself (as if you could switch it off and be normal), rather than just believing the aspects of control such as lust or action is wrong.
im with you sam, it feels like theyre saying different things. maybe he just said it in an unclear way, but in my opinion he said it like saying "this guy is attractive" is sin when saying "this girl is attractive" is not sin
at the core of same sex attraction is a "wound" that is not sinful persay, it needs to be addressed. lust is clearly a sin and we have a sinful nature. But in Christ our old identity is gone and our new identity is as saint. we need to see love in Christ as grace in various forms through HIS BODY THE CHURCH. no one changes in a vacuum. meetting the core need of acceptance, attachment, modeling healthy gender roles is only possible because of the blood of jesus but also because he GIVES SPIRITUAL GIFTS TO THE BODY in various forms. Sexuality inside of Christ is not a "sin repentance" issue necessarily it is a disconnected from grace issue. THE CHURCH misses the boat in that it misses the teaching of the one another commands.
Yes! Great comment! I think much of the church forgets that although we are Christians we are also humans with basic emotional needs. The attachment theory perspective really sheds light on how SSA comes to be.
Well obviously ChristianFocus’s view is Christian Focus’s view. However, to the others homosexuality is neither immoral nor amoral. The idea that we have a divine creator who would create homosexuals to only then cast homosexuality as spiritually wrongful is absurd. For God’s sake have a rich and powerful relationship with the Divine but better rescue your sanity and common sense from the boneheads who prescribe that “it’s ok to be thirsty but you mustn’t drink!”
Because you all know that a lot these not possible
every christians purpose is to learn to walk in the grace of god and love that out in context of christian relationships with the church. if straight men see ssa men as "Sinful" and needing to repent this will only drive them away. the need is to affirm their identity as Saints, and men among men whom are all broken and imperfect on some level. Access to mature consistent mentors is a must to resolve "Attachment loss". SSA is a reflection of a broken culture as much as it is an individuals sinful nature. you cannot address this issue without addressing the context of family they grew up in and creating a new safe healing context by which people can emmerge and discard their defense mechanism with safe accepting masculine rolemodels.
Completely wrong
How is this "completely wrong?"
"if you asked me, i would give you living water" jesus calls out the faith and Assertion of the woman at the well. who was probably shamed in culture and hiding from people by being at the well in a time of day when no one else would be there. in the same way those with same sex attraction have a core shame that fuels the same sex compulsion according to Dr. Joseph Nicolosi. see his video "Shame and attachment loss" "shame based self statement"
i hate myself
:( This video may be leading people astray. It is not a sin to be attracted (if you haven't chosen or willfully fostered the desire), it's a sin to act on that attraction. As with any sin, God wishes to forgive us if we seek forgiveness and reconciliation with Him and to amend our life. I have studied moral theology, spiritual theology, and Theology of the Body, have read books, and listened to many talks from a Catholic Christian perspective and am saddened by this video. @Ad1 I'm not sure exactly what spurred your comment but you are a beloved child of God, loved into existence.
"The Best Christian Response to Same Sex Attraction": th-cam.com/video/twdWKtIcs18/w-d-xo.html
hey pluto, I also experience similar hatred for myself, when I love God deeply and yet also love my partner (same sex) deeply, and find it hard to reconcile the 2. For most days I wish I didn't exist in the first place, why put me through so much agony in life, feeling like a total failure sinning against God, yet at the same heartbroken at the thought of having to leave my partner. I know it is really hard, and listening to "sermons" like this video where preacher speak without tact and empathy just makes it feel harder to live another day. But I want to assure you that through my years of struggle with the Lord (even to the point of depression), God has revealed more of Himself and His heart, His unconditional love, His daily encouragement, daily comforting through His Holy Spirit, and guidance, in a deep and personal way that I would never have other experience have not I been made to struggle with this issue. I want to assure you that our Lord our God is good, He embraces us just as we are, and picks us up everytime we fall and feels like shit. The Lord your God knows your pain and struggle, He is not a mean judgemental God but a loving one and He is with you even during the hardest, darkest, bleakest time of your live when you can't see what's ahead.. Do not give up my brother/sister. Trust His heart when you can't see His hand. I am still leaning on Him daily for strength and guidance, and may He himself lead the both of us in the way everlasting.
please don’t listen to these people, being gay is ok. you don’t have to live a life of misery. please stay strong, there are so many people who support you.
jesus loves you. take that love in He being perfect died in yoiur place so that you could be a beloved Son of God in his place.