Wow! Yes I grew up with an alcoholic father and people always look at me crazy when I say that I have no memories befor the age of 12. I am floored to find I’m not alone. And now I may know why there are no memories. Well very few. And those few are traumatic. Perhaps 99% of my childhood memories have been blocked in my mind? I’m a follower of Christ and maybe when I’m ready, He will reveal some to me.
Thank you for sharing your stories. My memory is also poor as a result of being brought up in an alcoholic home and being traumatized. I relate with how you feel and hearing your stories helps me accept the reality of my childhood and welcome healing.
My mom passed away 3 months ago from alcoholism. She was only 50. My mom was in violent relationships. Lots of fighting and cops. I remember being lifted up by my shirt and being dropped by one of her past boyfriends. We called him Sarge I guess for Sargent? I was like 6. My older sister would gather up my twin sister and I and we would go in a room if sarge and my mom happened to be fighting. My mother was never violent towards her children. Protective.
One time Sarge had my mom and all of us kids(4) in their bedroom he grabbed his shotgun waving it at us telling us all that its not loaded. I suffer from major depressive disorder and anxiety I understand a lot now
" In that christian environment" ? I heard that said here after 6,20 on the tape, and i just want to say for the ones that hear that. ACA as a whole, is NOT connected to any religious beliefsystem, but ACA is open for all beliefs or no-beliefs wether you are a non-believer, muslim, agnostic, atheist , christian, jew or another faith. What brings us togheter is that we have found a common solution through the 12 steps and 12 traditions of ACA. You are welcome to be yourself as you are. Remember that. Our meetings has nothing especially linked to any congregation or religious faith or tradition. One thing brings us togheter , the problem and the solution in the 12 steps/12 traditions.
Agreed its part of the 12 traditions which based on AA 12 traditions they support no outside groups etc however is using the term ACA as generic term like alcoholic?
Growing up in an alcoholic home there's no stability... Never knowing when the cops will need to come. Heating my mom say...don't go in the bathroom your father threw up again. She needed to clean it up. Many times I sat on a toilet with pee and look on it because of my dad. I also had to make sure I had slippers on because my dad peed on the floor missing the toilet. I was never told I was pretty and get praise. I became a book worm and hid in the bedroom A lot. I still suffer from depression and have a hard time trusting people in general. God is a healer and never wanted that for me. My dad never spoke mean to my mother or hit her. Years later I learned that my dad saw his dad hit his mom and he developed multiple addictions....alcohol, gambling, and over eating. I actually feel sorry for my dad. He's deceased now. He had a good heart but was emotionally stunted because of his childhood. God rest his soul.
Life gets better when we start learning to love ourselves, and allow Jesus to heal through the fellowship of other ACA people. The support groups, the work books and Jesus we can live and heal.
I'm divorced...I never had a good relationship with boyfriends or my X. They were all emotionally absent and I didn't matter. My X was a narcissist and very emotionally and verbally abusive....A Dr. Jekyll/Mr Hyde and claimed to be a believer in Jesus!!!! So confusing!!!! I decided to not enter any romantic relationships at all. Iv'e been alone now 17 years....working on getting healed.
Do the effects differ when it is one Parent as appose to two Parents? When it is one Parent the children become the target, and get it in place of the other parent. I would think.
Wow! Yes I grew up with an alcoholic father and people always look at me crazy when I say that I have no memories befor the age of 12. I am floored to find I’m not alone. And now I may know why there are no memories. Well very few. And those few are traumatic. Perhaps 99% of my childhood memories have been blocked in my mind? I’m a follower of Christ and maybe when I’m ready, He will reveal some to me.
Thank you for sharing your stories. My memory is also poor as a result of being brought up in an alcoholic home and being traumatized. I relate with how you feel and hearing your stories helps me accept the reality of my childhood and welcome healing.
My mom passed away 3 months ago from alcoholism. She was only 50. My mom was in violent relationships. Lots of fighting and cops. I remember being lifted up by my shirt and being dropped by one of her past boyfriends. We called him Sarge I guess for Sargent? I was like 6. My older sister would gather up my twin sister and I and we would go in a room if sarge and my mom happened to be fighting. My mother was never violent towards her children. Protective.
One time Sarge had my mom and all of us kids(4) in their bedroom he grabbed his shotgun waving it at us telling us all that its not loaded. I suffer from major depressive disorder and anxiety I understand a lot now
" In that christian environment" ? I heard that said here after 6,20 on the tape, and i just want to say for the ones that hear that. ACA as a whole, is NOT connected to any religious beliefsystem, but ACA is open for all beliefs or no-beliefs wether you are a non-believer, muslim, agnostic, atheist , christian, jew or another faith. What brings us togheter is that we have found a common solution through the 12 steps and 12 traditions of ACA. You are welcome to be yourself as you are. Remember that. Our meetings has nothing especially linked to any congregation or religious faith or tradition. One thing brings us togheter , the problem and the solution in the 12 steps/12 traditions.
Read the early history of AA where all anonymous fellowships spring from.
Agreed its part of the 12 traditions which based on AA 12 traditions they support no outside groups etc however is using the term ACA as generic term like alcoholic?
Growing up in an alcoholic home there's no stability... Never knowing when the cops will need to come. Heating my mom say...don't go in the bathroom your father threw up again. She needed to clean it up. Many times I sat on a toilet with pee and look on it because of my dad. I also had to make sure I had slippers on because my dad peed on the floor missing the toilet. I was never told I was pretty and get praise. I became a book worm and hid in the bedroom A lot. I still suffer from depression and have a hard time trusting people in general. God is a healer and never wanted that for me. My dad never spoke mean to my mother or hit her. Years later I learned that my dad saw his dad hit his mom and he developed multiple addictions....alcohol, gambling, and over eating. I actually feel sorry for my dad. He's deceased now. He had a good heart but was emotionally stunted because of his childhood. God rest his soul.
Listening to this just brought back memories I didn’t want to remember.
Life gets better when we start learning to love ourselves, and allow Jesus to heal through the fellowship of other ACA people. The support groups, the work books and Jesus we can live and heal.
But how do you deal during the lonely holidays?
Anger 😢
I'm divorced...I never had a good relationship with boyfriends or my X. They were all emotionally absent and I didn't matter. My X was a narcissist and very emotionally and verbally abusive....A Dr. Jekyll/Mr Hyde and claimed to be a believer in Jesus!!!! So confusing!!!! I decided to not enter any romantic relationships at all. Iv'e been alone now 17 years....working on getting healed.
Do the effects differ when it is one Parent as appose to two Parents?
When it is one Parent the children become the target, and get it in place of the other parent. I would think.
It depends on the situation how and severe the events.
Sad