I can handle most children noises in small doses BUT there’s one tone or octave that babies will get to that I describe as making my brain feel like it’s melting down my spinal cord 😆 There really is no other way to describe it.
Yes, me too, high pitched shrieking children goes right through me and it actually feels like a sort of pain. High pitched dog barks is also, and their owners allowing them to carry on barking non-stop sets me off
I feel like the people who created Food chewing/whispering/tapping ASMR did it solely to prove we live on a plane of torment. Well it certainly feels like it when I'm falling asleep to rain or something similar and it pops up in auto play. Blasting me awake like a twelve gauge outside my door.
😂😂 about 5-6 years ago I told my husband one of us needs to move to the guest room PERMANENTLY. He did and we have both been blissfully happily since. The breathing, snoring, twitching at night 🤬
"Can you please just stop breathing like that!? You're doing it on purpose aren't you?!" No, I'm doing it through my autonomic nervous system, it's my way of staying alive. Shall I breathe somewhere else? OK. Yes, if you can't stop it, at least take it somewhere else. Jeez. You're like Mr Snuffleuffegus with a wet head cold. And asthma." Divorce then? Thank god you said it, yes please. And I'm keeping the dog. He doesn't snore.😂
I honestly have no idea how I've managed to stay out of prison for the amount of times I've wanted to physically stop someone else from breathing 😂 especially during meditation groups!!
It's a bitch. Both happy at the wide spread acceptance of fidget toys recently and am more triggered in public than ever! Lived w another autistic and it didn't feel right to ask her to stop stimming because it was driving me up the wall.
I have had misophonia for as long as I can remember. My trigger sounds have never changed in the 30+ years I can remember having them. I tried for years to explain to others what I was experiencing and people just didn’t understand or have any empathy. I learned about it a few years ago and it was so validating to know it was actually a thing. Thank you for talking about this- it honestly has caused me so much anxiety and distress. I changed my whole life to avoid my trigger sounds. It caused relationships to end and friendships to fall apart. People couldn’t understand that it wasn’t just me not liking the sound, or being dramatic. It physically felt like being set on fire and it made me feel nauseous (I sometimes reflexively gag or shiver) and it emotionally enraged me, which was so disconcerting for myself and everyone around me because I’m normally such a calm and mild tempered person. Even in public, I would cover my ears and run from the sound if I heard it. The anxiety I felt when I thought I may hear my trigger sounds was torture. I avoided certain kinds of movies that I knew would have the sound in them. I avoided certain places where I may hear it. It was horrible. I tried CBT and it made everything so much worse. I lived in an environment where I was exposed to my triggers almost daily and my anxiety and reactions to them got more intense. Thankfully now I am living alone and have control over my safe space and am not in constant fear of hearing my triggers I feel much better. I have learned some DBT skills and got some earplugs for when I’m in a place I may hear my triggers. Even if I do hear them, because I’m not in constant state of anxiety or being exposed to them, it’s still viscerally unpleasant but the feeling is less intense and passes more quickly. I wish I’d known about all of this 30 years ago. Understanding myself and autism has been a heck of a journey this last year and it’s been both the hardest and most rewarding thing I have ever done. Thank you again for talking about this. I need to go have a cathartic cry and enjoy the feeling of being seen and understood. It’s a rare delicacy for us late diagnosed autistics.
Absolutely! I used to get a top floor apartment and dealt with hauling groceries up three flights of stairs. No high rises with elevators where I lived (in the suburbs).
If you haven't seen the sketch "Everyone's upstairs neighbours" from Above Average, I highly recommend it. It's a great way to feel a bit better when your neighbours are being a menace.
Doctors have warned me they can cause some problems (I’ve had several ear infections since I started using them, and I’ve also struggled with earwax buildup), but I honestly can’t survive without them, I hadn’t noticed how much sounds triggered me until I started using them. Despite having these issues, I’ll probably keep using them!
I feel this way about the sounds children make. I always wondered if parents just lost their hearing when they had them. I never had them and have never regretted it. I am well over 50 and still can't stand to be around them.
I have friends with kids, and it's weird: if I am at the same table as them, the shrieking isn't as bad, but somehow once I'm at least 6 feet away, the acoustics somehow quintuple the volume. I truly don't understand it.
@@FallacyBites the video missed a very important point: predictable versus unpredictable noise. I love heavy bass music because I know how the music unfolds, but I hate my neighbor using a screwdriver because I have no control over the volume and frequency of the sound, it messes my mind so that I am unable to think about anything else but that irritating noise. I love hearing my toddler because I know him, I know how he plays and how he shows his emotions. I also have some control over him as a parent. I love his voice too, but some other children voice make me mad
I literally just moved my entire family to another county because I couldn’t stand listening to our neighbors blasting loud obnoxious thumping bass from their car parked on the street outside our house. I’d beg them to stop and they’d retaliate by turning it up louder. They were renters, so I reached out to their landlord, and they also did nothing. It was pure torture and torment, because I couldn’t go home to get away from it, because I WAS home. I could literally FEEL the thumping bass throughout my whole body and it rattled my windows and shook my floors, it was THAT loud. My husband (even though I don’t think this was his intent) invalidated my feelings by saying things like “well none of our other neighbors are bothered by it!”. 😤 He’d also say things like “well it’s the middle of the day and they’re not doing anything wrong so you need to get over it!”. Just because you CAN do something doesn’t mean you SHOULD do something. Personally I think people are entitled to peace in THEIR OWN HOMES no matter the hour of the day…but that’s just me. Obviously this is a very deep issue for me.
You did well to move. I moved because my upstairs neighbor would pace for hours. He was crazy and his crazy energy made me incredibly uptight. He was also armed. It's definitely better, however now I suffer from inconsiderate neighbors slamming their doors. I don't feel I can say anything, because it's at a level that wouldn't have bothered me ten years ago. But now I'm a crotchety old man. I don't know these people well enough to even say anything, and they'll probably move before I do anyway. Still, I am considering putting a piece of foam insulation over the inside of my front door, just to cut the level of the noise. The problem in these situations is less autism than barbarianism.
I understand the depth of your issue perfectly. If I get even the faintest whiff of thumping music floating on a stray breeze from several streets away then I feel the anger building and I can't relax. My family just tell me to block it out Ha!, as if I could! Like you my feelings are dismissed by people who just cannot understand the way it gets in your soul. If I'm out somewhere it doesn't have the same effect I think because I know that I can move away from the source of my irritation. If I see somebody else nearby setting up for some sort of gathering at their house my anxiety levels go through the roof in case the music starts. A few years ago one of my neighbours decided to have a three-day anniversary party. It was sheer hell for me. The authorities didn't want to know about it even though there were a number of laws being broken. When I was single I moved a number of times but there was always some jerk who just had to share their music with the world. I had no refuge, my house was just a shelter not my place of safety. I agree that you should be able to have peace in your own home at any time. Sadly, my wife refuses to move to an environment that is beneficial for me so I guess I'm stuck with others inflicting their life on me. I'm glad I read your comment, it's nice to know that it's not just me and I'm not a crazy person. Thank you.
You are not alone. I get extremely triggered by the same thing and I hate it that people are so inconsiderate like that. Thankfully I was able to move away from the neighbors that were having their backyard parties late into the night. I also hate fireworks for the same reason and everyone in the whole city goes bonkers on New Years and 4th of July.
Just yesterday, one of the tenants of my building came to me because her neighbors were driving her crazy with their noise. She looked terrible--really burned out. I got the ball rolling to get this sorted out, through pressure from the landlord, and the condo president. When those noisy tenants moved in I thought, "What's up with that landlord? Can't he see what lowlifes these people are?" Luckily they are just renters. It's a lot harder when they are owners. Luckily the bedroom in my own apartment is very quiet. The living room, on the other hand, is exposed to the slamming doors of my inconsiderate neighbors. I'm considering getting a piece of foam to make the front door more soundproof.
My neighbors music reverberates off of my house which also is my bedroom wall and all I hear is the bass Usually when I need a nap Unfortunately moving isn't a financial option for me
That's what I feel when I hear television noises. And to make it even worse, I've also got a rare form of synesthesia, where I can feel sounds and "hear" through touch, so that noise is physically painful to me. It really could cause a person to snap...
Oh I hear that! When the noise is being made by a human for the simple reason that they have no consideration for anyone around them my strong hatred of unfair behaviour kicks in and I honestly don't know how I control myself most of the time. I hate conflict but I won't be walked over either so it's emotionally draining to the extreme. The building next to mine has a private car park and one of the young women that lives there lets her father park his midlife crisis sports car in her space (he doesn't live there). He comes and sits in this ridiculously loud car with the engine idling for between 30 minutes and hour, revving it occasionally before he finally drives it away. I went and politely explained how bad the acoustics are because of all the tall buildings and asked if he could please not do it. He decided to argue with me and call me a liar. Let's just say I had a few choice words for him. No idea how I stopped myself from doing what I wanted to do to him (probably fear of being arrested to be honest) but the shame I felt afterwards, well I'm autistic so it will be with me for the rest of my life
A “weird one” that really irks me is the slapping sound of flip flops as someone walks around. There were a lot of sounds that really got under my skin as a kid. But I didn’t express my frustration properly and got in trouble a lot for disproportionate responses. Usually anger.
@@batintheattic7293 why oops? Everyone is different and has different likes and dislikes. No, it was a parent, always wore them on the weekends. I believe I associate the sound with being woken up earlier than I wanted for chores.
Love the channel, thanks so much! I am a 57 year old man living in Montreal who is undiagnosed(self-diagnosed) with Autism and ADHD. Why not get clinically diagnosed? Don't have the resources for private and the mental health care in this city is abysmal(I've tried)THAT said its only through research and channels like yours that I've realized over the last couple of years I check most of the boxes in both categories and have struggled my whole life. NOT stupid, NOT lazy. VERY challenged by this brain. As for sound-I'm a musician who can't listen to music anymore. Unless it's mellow and of MY choosing, music out in the world just about sets me crazy. Now the LIST: Babies Crying(THIS one causes immediate Anger and flee response while trying to think BE compassionate-the baby is just unhappy or uncomfortable) Children Shrieking and laughing in the school yard Ambulance and Fire Truck Sirens Sudden loud booms from say- a garbage truck Loud(obnoxious)motorcycles and cars Flip-Flops Flapping Snoring ETC, Etc, Etc...... I DO however love Thunder, even when it causes a major jump. The struggle IS REAL fine friends. Take care.
I have the same issues and work with loud cars all day lol. I also love that feeling of thunder though my body. Any weather that muffles or dampens noise is also great. Downpours, fog, and snow are excellent.
I can't handle multiple people talking at the same time. I don't mean people talking over each other, I mean multiple different conversations i.e. at work when we do shift change and people are giving report to each other. This is especially difficult (no offense) to women with higher pitched voices. I just can't handle it. It's like nails on a chalkboard. I'm not sure if this counts, but it's like too much stimulus at the same time. I just want to yell at everybody like a mean librarian.
Or worse, when people are talking overtop of someone else or overtop of you, when you are the one trying to say something. I can't say a full sentence around my family, and then they ask later why I hate socializing.
Those exaggerated sounds that the “influencers” use on their videos for TikTok and Reels! I’ve always wondered too why certain noises in movies and tv shows would bother me. Now that I’m diagnosed, it all makes sense.
I didn't actually realize that there was a specific name for this sensation. It saddens me because I have discussed this issue in therapy multiple times, and it has always been related to generalized anxiety. I feel very seen knowing that there is a name for this and that others experience this sensation as well ❤️
Yeah, that sucks because I have generalized anxiety disorder, and my sensitivity to certain sounds is definitely a different thing, although it can make me feel anxious.
I'm in my 50s and I have had these struggles for as long as I can remember. Trying to explain it to someone with the hope of understanding usually proved impossible, often resulting in them occasionally testing me or using the sound against me now that they know my kryptonite. I'm so glad awareness is increasing and am hopeful for the future generation, also crossing fingers that much better understanding and possibly treatments come about within my lifetime. Thanks for the video!
Oh God, the "testing" by doing it again is the single most irresponsible, rude, and immature response!!! And then they get upset at our reaction towards them?! What did they expect?! 😡
Lawnmowers, leaf blowers, car and motorcycle engines, car doors slamming, walking in the stairway, kid sounds, yelling, breaks squeaking, smacking, certain kind of whispering (for example asmr videos) = 😡⚰😡⚰😡 Most of these are everyday sounds in blocks of flats. Can't afford my own house in the countryside. Life is hell. 🤣
I was once renting from a guy who would leave his dog home alone all day and it had bad separation anxiety and would bark the entire time, 10 hours a day. One week I was there with that with my autistic 6 year old screaming about it all day (home with me 24/7 due to covid being raging) when a new neighbour's car alarm decided this week it would go off every time a bee would so much as fart. As you can imagine, this made my kiddo even crazier. And I have it too, on top of having to keep him calm. All day and night it kept triggering until bylaw(who I'd been calling every night about it) showed up and told them their car would be impounded if they got one more call about it.
Send an email to your housing officer and if they don’t listen then to your local counsellors/MP! I have had this issue with my downstairs neighbour, plus the neighbourhood kids and I have to email them constantly about the shrieking of the children! The other stuff bothers me, but I am able to control it more, but the shrieking from the kids and bouncing of the ball and the ball against the metal fence is 😡🤬😡🤬😡🤬
@@Jae-by3hf I don't know what country you're from but there's no such thing as a 'housing officer' in mine. Also, "I was ONCE renting," and "All day and night it kept triggering UNTIL..." It's all good now because I don't live there anymore AND because it was resolved already. Thanks anyway. I don't think I could/would call because of children, what they're doing is necessary for a human's development.
I can so relate to leaf blowers. I can tolerate any other lawn care sounds more easily but throw a leaf blower in & I have to fight the urge to destroy the equipment. The frequency of the sound & the vibrations make me feel like my brain is gonna explode or I’m gonna go insane
Ah- and in the countryside there is logging dogs leaf blowers - it is better in that I can usually find someplace to freak out wo anyone seeing when I can’t escape the noise- the advantage is no one hears ME when I’m overwhelmed and shrieking for it to stop. Why why why does it activate a rage response?
Shrieking children cause me physical pain. Also horrible are the sounds of cutlery dropped on a plate or when people breathe with their mouths. But I sleep well with the distance sound of a lawn mower.
My 12 year old neighbor plays basketball and the sound of the ball dribbling outside my window drives me mad. And I'm on the second floor with the windows closed, and I can still hear each time the ball hits the pavement perfectly clearly. He's a kid, so I deal with it, but man it sucks.
Something similar for me is we had a dog who would often be around the side of the house. It was about 3 feet wide and a metal fence opposite my window. Even with the window closed, curtains down and blackout screen down, the dog barking would be like a giant needle going straight through my ears. When I knew it was about to happen it sucked, when it was out of nowhere it was tremendously painful.
Yes. My most hated sound is someone rubbing their finger across a balloon. It feels as if someone is taking the filings in my teeth and twisting them in their sockets. And it hangs on for a long time.
As usual, Chris, your videos are so full of useful information, and just... humor. I'm very sensitive to sound, always have been. The chaotic sound of a bunch of people in an enclosed and public place (such as a restaurant) all talking at once, is a recipe for overwhelm. I've found darned few people understand this. So, thank you. And thank you especially for the blooper reels. You remind me each time I see your videos that we can laugh at ourselves; life can be funny, including life with autism.
I worked in print for over 10 years and a sound that kills me is folding paper when people sharpen the crease with their fingers. I cannot stand it. Some other sounds I cannot stand: Florecent lights hum, dragging chairs across the floor, high pitch glitchy sound noises, children screaming or laughing, windchimes. I don't have the crunching eating issue but talking while eating is gross. But some noises just grind me to a halt. This is why working from home is so great. No weird smells and way more control over sound.
@@TwisterTornadoYou just don't have an issue with that one, they do. For example I can withstand the lights and chairs, but HATE mouth noises and love wind chimes. Children are made to get on my nerves it seems.
I’m so glad this isn’t just me. The worst sounds for me are someone eating soft fruits. It gets really bad if that person has a cold too so they’re breathing through their mouth whilst eating. If there’s something in the background, like the TV or radio, it does lessen the intensity of the aggravation I feel.
I had to find my dog a new home because he had this sharp piercing bark, and he was a very anxious dog (Pomchi) so the slightest sound outside of a car or someone at our door would send him into a fit. It got to the point that I was having an anxiety attack every time he heard something outside. It also didn't help that he was extremely possessive of me and wanted to stay right under my feet at all times, so I could hardly get a moment's peace.
At least you rehomed responsibly, most people don't exactly have the energy or don't care enough (about the animal) DUE to the issues. If i have money and free time, im just settling for a nice quiet lizard.
For me its when there's two or more pieces of music playing at once. It's most common in shops. Either there's different music playing on different floors and there's a point where the two pieces overlap. Or there might be one piece playing in the shop and another in the shopping centre outside. Sometimes you get loud buskers out in the street and some shops will still play their music and I don't know how people don't just run outside. I have never been able to articulate what it feels like to experience, but all I can do is clamp my hands over my ears and get away as quickly as possible.
My whole life I have HATED hearing people eat especially when they don't close their mouth while eating. I told myself that I didn't like it because I was taught that you are meant to shut your mouth while eating. I now realise I have misophonia, and also that people were breaking the rule of etiquette.
Finger nails on a chalk board....for those that need to understand the refrence lol I say that cuz MOST people dislike that sound. Mine is to many things going at the same time. If a TV is on and a radio in another room and then people talking all at the same time I internally start to freak out and have to go somewhere where there's only 1 thing going on. My brain can't decide which sound is the most important to focus on and it overwhelms it exponentially...
If I miss this, it isn’t because I didn’t think it was important. Rather, I didn’t hear the multiple alarms I set, and somehow missed seeing Al the vibrant, eye catching sticky notes I left everywhere. 😢. Truly.
Any thudding base sound, unfortunately for me. So music with loud base, my own surround sound system when an intro or movie scene includes base, or anything similar just pounds against my nervous system and may be worse than water boarding! I legit become enraged until it stops or I stop it. Definitely a feeling similar to claustrophobia. It's so bad and unfortunately so prevalent that I bought a house and moved waaay out of city limits just to get away from that particular trigger. Also the wet, sticky, churning sound of food in the mouth, like when someone eats a candy bar. I make MY OWN SELF angry with this one. Not even the loud humming of my fridge and the air being forced through the ac vents can blend it out. The other thing that feels like a cheese grater to the nerves is shoe dragging. The sound of someone's sole creating that scrapping sound across dirt and flooring makes me want to punch them or scream "Pick up your 🤬 feet!! It's not that hard!" I could go on but I won't.
Chris, thank you so much for your inclusion and explanation of misophonia. My partner is autistic and will not eat out in restaurants. Nor do we eat together at home, and now I have more of an understanding why. She also has acute hearing and any repetitive sound that is not normal will often make her really angry. (Pigeons constantly cooing on the roof as an example.) In part I already understand as I have hyperacusis, which is when loud sounds penetrate tinnitus, and physically and mentally produce a shock. Thanks once again, and I find I am understanding more, every time I watch a new video of either yourself or Debby.
Oh Lord. I missed the first part when you were live, so I had to hear what sound you played. I always thought the problem was with ME. Hearing certain sounds like that, I get a moment of vertigo, even a "brain zap" and my teeth feel like I've bitten into a tinfoil sandwich. Sometimes it's even the phrases people use, not just sounds. Ex: something super wonderfully gleeful and cheesy that feels disingenuous. I just can't put my finger on that. It's like "cringing" taken up 10 levels and felt throughout. Add in a sucky chewy sound and I'm toast 😭
Really appreciate that! Hope you'll find more of the videos helpful because I remember so clearly being at the same spot as you, not that long ago. The more you learn about your brain, the better you'll be able to accommodate it and figure out what you need to thrive 🙂
@@ChrisandDebby the services after diagnosis in the UK "suck" (as you would put it 🤣) so TH-cam have been great Being told you're autistic at 30 and that's why you have had so many issues, then rushed out the door and left to yourself - it's some challenge!
For me it’s so bad, that I can’t even look at someone eating. Because I know the sound is there. And if I wear my in ears then I can hear the sound of me eating which isn’t much better 😂 My mom would always yell at me for saying that her eating was bothering me, which obviously was not helpful 😅 I also can’t listen to the radio or podcasts because I am filled with rage when the speaker’s mouth is either too wet, or too dry. You know, old people mouth sounds like them liking their lips or their disgusting tongue sticking to the roof of their mouth. The worst part is, I echolalia stim alllll the time, and I’m so worried it triggers others 😢
THE FORK SCRATCHING THE PLATE IS SO BADDD 😭😭💀💀 but what really gets me is chewing. Not the crunchy chewing, but specifically the like creamy food or like soft food chewing. When it hate it with all types of chewing, IS WHEN THEY BREATH LOUDLY WHILE CHEWING LOUDLY ITS THE WORST IT MAKES ME ALMOST GET A HEADACHE JUST THINKING ABOUT IT AAAA 😭😭
I don't even like to say the one sound that really REALLY makes me cringe inside of my skin. It makes my joints ache. And typically takes my producing a different more pronounced sound to override the sensory discomfort of this other sound. Paper being ripped, tape being removed from cardboard, and other similar sounds. My last several office jobs were a minefield for overwhelm.
one of the most common triggers for me is overlapping sound, particularly music or TV/movie. Hearing music or a show and then someone comes in playing music on their device or another car has a really loud system pumping, or talking over what I'm watching or listening to.
Loud, high pitched noises are the worst for me. I have to stop myself from yelling “That’s not going to make it get here any faster!!!” to people at work who repeatedly press the button for the elevator 😂
I had to pull over multiple times on my road trip yesterday to stop a rattle in the back of the van. The million needles description is perfect. I also can't go to the movie theater in my community because of the lobby. It has an arcade, and the noise echoes in my brain. If i have to go, i bring headphones and blast music. I buy tickets online and show up seconds before the theater seats are opened. I also don't buy popcorn or anything unless someone else gets it for me. The second i am in the theater space, i am fine. My child is also paranoid about chewing with his mouth because of my reaction to his noise. I also broke up with someone because they thought chewing popcorn loudly was cute. I will read those research links. Thanks for this post. I tried the earplugs that allow some sounds through but not all, and those work on overload days when i have to drive and there are rattles in the van.
Sniffling is my trigger noise, and it made school absolute hell. I was crying during tests because I couldn't focus with the sound going on around me, and my class schedule ended up getting changed one year because a classmate was bullying me over it to the point that it became a classroom disruption.
I just realized, this is part of the reason I hated driving so much once my stereo broke. My initial problem is, i'm completely obsessed with music. Second, it always reminded me of those scenes in movies where everything gets really quiet right before an accident. And lastly, I can now hear the sound of the motor running. I cannot stand the sound, large or small. I actually find the sound of all motors terrifying. It really brings on a fight or flight response. I completely stopped driving, but there were a number of reasons for that as well. I get so overwhelmed when i'm out of my house, it's really hard to keep track of all the triggers. Wish I had a light-weight space suit lol. Thank you, this really makes me feel validated.
The first 30 seconds of this video were a ride man. I nearly shut it off, then you pulled it back and told me everything I wanted to hear, haha, but hoowee, that was a rollercoaster.
Sadly, I dont think it's possible for anyone who doesn't have misophonia to truly understand it. I've locked myself in a school bathroom and slammed my head into the wall because I had a teacher who wouldnt stop chewing gum in class no matter how many times I tried to explain it to her, and after that, even my family still believed I was just being dramatic. Everyone has sounds and other stimuli that bother them. But there is a huge difference between being annoyed by a sound, versus that sound literally driving you to self injury.
As a fellow person with misophonia, i love this video. I have watched thons of videos, no one has eaven been close to as good as this one. Thank you so mutch❤️
The one that sets me off is the backup alarm on commercial vehicles. My place of employment is in a cluster of warehouse buildings, and I can hear them all day long. I started using loop ear plugs. They work good and I can still hear people talking to me.
An interesting addition to my misophonia is I still experience the effects even when I turn down the volume if there is a visual element. If I even see the source of the sound or potential sound like someone chewing or an animal licking I still feel ill and highly agitated. Also the distant sound of a base note rumbling my house induces anger. It’s like I’m stuck in a drum being torture. 😓
Sounds that leave me feeling like there's either an existential threat to me or someone else leave me panicking or feeling disgusted and highly distressed. Sirens of emergency vehicles - especially ambulances - upset me several times a day. Very common to autistics, and piercingly and painfully high-pitched and loud. I think its also partly because of the worry for any people in danger. Any mucussy mouth or nose sounds - disgusting and, I believe it's ancient response against perceived contamination by germs. I also have the eating disorder ARFID, which sometimes correlates to autism, and this phobia is part of that. The sound of the night when I wanna sleep upsets me: I'm listening out for spiders. Traffic sounds - especially motorbikes or cars revving - are also extremely upsetting, possibly because it seems relentless, selfish and it creates pollution. Again, it leaves me feeling drained, upset and burnt out. Please be thoughtful when you do stuff, peeps, when you can. Modern life has to happen, but spare a thought for others, autistic or otherwise, who may feel sensory distress at your actions. Thank you 🥰
You know I like the night sounds for one good reason. Little bugs and amphibians get quiet when they deal with predators around. If only one toad or frog suddenly stops, they just caught something (they love spiders btw).
I have had misophonia since I was a teen. It's the worst with the people close to me. It's so so bad I have meltdowns super often. The anger part is horrendous. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.
I'm autistic and have sensory processing disorder and I'm sensitive to a lot of different sensory inputs including sound. I would say that the single thing that has helped me to manage noise sensitivity the most is an alternative therapy called Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) aka Tapping. Fireworks used to be a huge trigger for me and I found EFT shortly before the 4th of July in 2019. I started using it and was able to get through the holiday virtually stress free when in previous years I'd be on the floor in a full meltdown. I also find it easier to manage things like crying children in grocery stores. I absolutely still have noise sensitivity, but the severity is nowhere near what it used to be before I started using EFT. I think EFT is really great for people on the autism spectrum, especially those that find stimming helpful, because the tapping you do with EFT is like a controlled form of stimming. You can learn to do EFT with very little training from free videos on TH-cam, but there are also inexpensive courses on it on sites like Udemy.
I love your sense of humor. 😂 Thank you. Always amazing to watch your videos 🎉 Learning alot of consideration to peoples needs through you. Can always improve on that sensitivity
Thanks for spreading the word that this is a REAL THING experienced by many people and it’s not just me being “too sensitive” again. I work hard to push thru and stay civil. But it’s hard! And yes taking good care of yourself definitely helps make everything easier, but it’s still a struggle. I’m late diagnosed ADHD. But since I was a young kid the eating sounds of my dad, specifically, would drive me crazy. Sometimes his breathing sounds too. Now as an adult I feel angry at my poor husband whenever he’s eating or drinking near me. He also frantically scrapes his plate to get every last drop of sauce and I just want to scream! Also when my cat is grooming her paws by biting her claws, I just have to leave the room.
For me cardboard boxes are a massive trigger. The sounds of cardboard pieces rubbing against each other as well as the sound of ripping the cardboard box into pieces or folding it. Touching the cardboard is equally as unpleasant; I feel it in my spinal cord and I have to shake it off every time. Same issue with a styrofoam...omg this plus cardboard is a pure torture.😖
As a child I used to get really angry at my mum during breakfast because she was chewing too loud (as an late diagnosed autistic person I now understand why because i was always told not to make a fuss) and restaurant eating, eating in public or with family is still a big problem and I get exhausted and frustrated from the masking. My feelings are mainly disgust and anger because I feel trapped and frustrated because it is not polite to yell at people that they should chew somewhere else. Also ticking clocks are a huge thing that make my brain melt and make me want to throw things. THE worst is people chewing gum. I can't even find words how awful that is.
Thank you so much for this. This is the best explanation I've seen on this.. I have a few things that just set me off. Like biting ice or Popsicles or biting of apples. They sent chills up my spine and give me goose bumps.. even just thinking of the sounds do this. And I love apples.. this makes me super sad. Then there are situational sounds, like someone humming or singing to themselves that just sends my brain into a rage because it's so distracting and needless noises.... but.. I love hearing the choir at church or singing in music... I don't know why there is such a difference.
Chris ! New here and so glad finding ur channel ! I’m almost 60 and very high masking late non diagnosed. Sensory overload busting me wide open in later yrs. I have a curse ! It’s called TINNITUS !! It keeps me on edge every awake moment. Any sharp clinking noise puts me trough roof. Dishes, cups n plates. Now plastic in my house…😢
Thank you for this video, I've just learned that I'm a misophone in addition to my hyperacusis. Ever since I was little I couldn't stand the same noises described in the video. I used to go crazy at the dinner table and get a spanking if I didn't keep quiet. The noises were so intense. Over time I just got used to it. As a result, I've been stuck in my house for over 3 years now, unable to live because the sound of a bird or wind drives me crazy.... I live in France and the appointments are long (usually 6 months waiting time for a specialist). I've been applying the solutions suggested in the videos for some time now and it's really relieving, but I think psychological follow-up is necessary in my case. I've probably pulled too hard on the string. In short, thank you very much for your videos, I'm making more progress in identifying my symptoms with you than with any doctor I've seen in over 3 years. By the way, the official diagnosis for autism usually takes more than 3 years, but thanks to you I was able to be sure and since I've been following your advice I'm starting to feel better. Thank you so much
That’s interesting, I found those sounds at the beginning nostalgic and warm and reminiscent of warm memories. I don’t recall really having any major negative reactions to any specific sensory things for a long time.
This is interesting to me, as I never realised it was associated with emotions. I get huge sensory responses to sound (e.g. top of my spine shivers in response to certain sudden sounds - I've suppressed them in the past but since my diagnosis I've tried hard not to). Your video has made me realise how much anxiety (which I've always ignored as normal) is related to sounds etc.
The second I saw the food in the beginning my brain was like NO!! For me personally, when any of these sounds that I can't handle pop up, it's like different sounds are in different "audio channels" and the second one of "the sounds" start, all other audio channels are turned down, while the one with "the sound(s)" is/are turned up extremely much. Mostly I have to either focus hard to endure it until it's over if I know it's temporary or short, or I have to leave the room if I think it might take a while. Some of these sounds for me are the wet food lip smacking and chewing (I'm fine with crunching noises thankfully), also the fork on plate scratching, some fabrics rubbing against each other like rain coat fabric (horrible). Terror sound bonus: Once in a laboratory the lid of the centrifuge was broken and everyone concluded "let's just leave it off until it's fixed" and every time the centrifuge was being used, it produced a terribly loud screeching/screaming sound and I had to leave the room every time. I found this a very relatable and interesting video! I haven't seen that many people talk about this. Thank you!
My misophonia when it comes to wet chewing sounds makes it feel like centipedes or other bugs are crawling in my ears and causes an immediate need to flee. This has hurt my family’s feelings but enduring that sound is simply torture
Omg, this is totally me. I can go from "happy go lucky" to feelings rage just from the sound of someone eating or breathing... heavy metal music is also immediately causes anxiety and anger.
Don't let the fear response win!Training my brain that any angle grinders & weed hackers outside my classroom aren't trying to kill me has been quite a ride. By sticking through it (after closing the door), asking my students for patience & letting myself shakily forge forth, I've gone from being mute & frozen to being teary or shakey while trying to teach. The triggers don't last for many minutes & I am extra tired afterwards.
This is exactly why my mini clip mp3 player is one of the best purchases I've ever made, that along with some wired earbuds have made being out in the world so much easier to handle. I'm basically never without them and will continue to replace them anytime they break down from so much usage.
Thank you!! I didn't know about this, but I hated the coughing sound as a kid with every fiber of my being (I still do now but look less bothered). I would curl and imagine tearing things up. Didn't help with my dad being a smoker and would do the crunchy throat clearing and half cough that you know would mean there's more to come :(( I thought I was a brat until watching this video. I also thought everyone hates that sound so I suppressed all my coughs growing up lol
Misophonia SUUUUCKS!!!!!!! While certain sound triggers have remained constant for me, when I am particularly overstimulated, other sounds can become too much. Sadly, even the voices of people I love can become awful. I'm so glad I got my earplugs!
Kyle Hill released a video a few years ago title 'Autism is my superpower.' He went on to explain his experience, including misophonia, and it was THAT that led me to my eventual self-diagnosis.
I had this worse as a young person. I've found context has a lot to do with my sensitivity to certain sounds. Decades of listening to all sorts of leftfield music, IDM and the like, trained my ears and conditioned my acceptance of certain sounds elsewhere in life, especially if they're in anyway close to repetitive/rhythmical. My tolerance is way higher than my autistic friend who hasn't exposed themselves to copius amounts of Autechre and Panasonic since late teens. But it still gets me from time to time 😣
Dogs barking, bass beats, lawnmowers (in Germany!), radio and motorcycles make me nuts. I have also great aversion for overaccoustic spaces and bad quality stereo devices. I percieve all the resonances, yuk…
The sound of Percussion Maracas made me ill once. I felt like when I had the flu with high fewer for hours afterwards. It was quite shocking because I didn't experience strong reactions to sound before.
Yes forks on plates. Also flies, mosquitoes, and strangely the beeps made at a self serve register at a supermarket is really painful as well as stressful.
Children shrieking is officially the worst sound in the world. Painful. Absolutely painful
And kid shows!!!!!
@@philly8184 totally!
What about Build-a-Bear Workshop when there’s a kid’s party on whilst you’re shopping for cuddly companions! I get what you mean about the pain.
I can handle most children noises in small doses BUT there’s one tone or octave that babies will get to that I describe as making my brain feel like it’s melting down my spinal cord 😆 There really is no other way to describe it.
Yes, me too, high pitched shrieking children goes right through me and it actually feels like a sort of pain. High pitched dog barks is also, and their owners allowing them to carry on barking non-stop sets me off
I feel like the people who created Food chewing/whispering/tapping ASMR did it solely to prove we live on a plane of torment. Well it certainly feels like it when I'm falling asleep to rain or something similar and it pops up in auto play. Blasting me awake like a twelve gauge outside my door.
unfortunately it's not normally well received telling someone not to breathe 🙄
I guess 😂 but you unfortunately gotta put up with it.
😂😂 about 5-6 years ago I told my husband one of us needs to move to the guest room PERMANENTLY. He did and we have both been blissfully happily since. The breathing, snoring, twitching at night 🤬
"Can you please just stop breathing like that!? You're doing it on purpose aren't you?!"
No, I'm doing it through my autonomic nervous system, it's my way of staying alive. Shall I breathe somewhere else?
OK. Yes, if you can't stop it, at least take it somewhere else. Jeez. You're like Mr Snuffleuffegus with a wet head cold. And asthma."
Divorce then?
Thank god you said it, yes please. And I'm keeping the dog. He doesn't snore.😂
Lol. I have asked the same thing. I'm not actually serious about it,in my brain though it's makes total sense to ask that.
I honestly have no idea how I've managed to stay out of prison for the amount of times I've wanted to physically stop someone else from breathing 😂 especially during meditation groups!!
I work with folks on the spectrum. It’s challenging because one person’s stim is another person’s trigger…
Oh yes! I can relate
Nha na na na. Open mouth crunching chips is universally vile.
I LOVE clicking my pen. HATE other people clicking their pens. Also, loud kitchen noises. Yuck.
It's a bitch. Both happy at the wide spread acceptance of fidget toys recently and am more triggered in public than ever! Lived w another autistic and it didn't feel right to ask her to stop stimming because it was driving me up the wall.
I heard it basically be called the porcupine effect. They’re prickly and can prick each other.
I have had misophonia for as long as I can remember. My trigger sounds have never changed in the 30+ years I can remember having them. I tried for years to explain to others what I was experiencing and people just didn’t understand or have any empathy. I learned about it a few years ago and it was so validating to know it was actually a thing. Thank you for talking about this- it honestly has caused me so much anxiety and distress.
I changed my whole life to avoid my trigger sounds. It caused relationships to end and friendships to fall apart. People couldn’t understand that it wasn’t just me not liking the sound, or being dramatic. It physically felt like being set on fire and it made me feel nauseous (I sometimes reflexively gag or shiver) and it emotionally enraged me, which was so disconcerting for myself and everyone around me because I’m normally such a calm and mild tempered person. Even in public, I would cover my ears and run from the sound if I heard it. The anxiety I felt when I thought I may hear my trigger sounds was torture. I avoided certain kinds of movies that I knew would have the sound in them. I avoided certain places where I may hear it. It was horrible. I tried CBT and it made everything so much worse. I lived in an environment where I was exposed to my triggers almost daily and my anxiety and reactions to them got more intense.
Thankfully now I am living alone and have control over my safe space and am not in constant fear of hearing my triggers I feel much better. I have learned some DBT skills and got some earplugs for when I’m in a place I may hear my triggers. Even if I do hear them, because I’m not in constant state of anxiety or being exposed to them, it’s still viscerally unpleasant but the feeling is less intense and passes more quickly. I wish I’d known about all of this 30 years ago. Understanding myself and autism has been a heck of a journey this last year and it’s been both the hardest and most rewarding thing I have ever done. Thank you again for talking about this. I need to go have a cathartic cry and enjoy the feeling of being seen and understood. It’s a rare delicacy for us late diagnosed autistics.
You are not alone! Truly the worst.
upstairs neighbor stomping and vibrating the entire building. and the fact that they walk 150% the speed of a normal person
😅😂🎉Hahaha Hahaha
Absolutely! I used to get a top floor apartment and dealt with hauling groceries up three flights of stairs. No high rises with elevators where I lived (in the suburbs).
This made me laugh because it's so true! 150%.. 🤣
If you haven't seen the sketch "Everyone's upstairs neighbours" from Above Average, I highly recommend it. It's a great way to feel a bit better when your neighbours are being a menace.
@@ddsbread5673 Thankyou for sharing
I laughed loudly. 😅
Noise cancelling headphones are the best invention ever.
@@SeriouslyJaded don’t know how I ever survived without them. I live in them now - literally 😅.
@@ninaandianfan21 me too.
Doctors have warned me they can cause some problems (I’ve had several ear infections since I started using them, and I’ve also struggled with earwax buildup), but I honestly can’t survive without them, I hadn’t noticed how much sounds triggered me until I started using them. Despite having these issues, I’ll probably keep using them!
@@capybaraconlimon6754I clean my tips often and my ears daily.
You could switch to over the ear headphones if possible instead of buds.
I love my Wyse noise-canceling headphones. After four years of constant use they are falling apart.
I feel this way about the sounds children make. I always wondered if parents just lost their hearing when they had them. I never had them and have never regretted it. I am well over 50 and still can't stand to be around them.
I say this too, do “parents” lose their hearing because the noise levels of children screeching in 2024 is ridiculous!
It’s a learned skill to block out loud kids 😆
I have friends with kids, and it's weird: if I am at the same table as them, the shrieking isn't as bad, but somehow once I'm at least 6 feet away, the acoustics somehow quintuple the volume.
I truly don't understand it.
@@FallacyBites the video missed a very important point: predictable versus unpredictable noise. I love heavy bass music because I know how the music unfolds, but I hate my neighbor using a screwdriver because I have no control over the volume and frequency of the sound, it messes my mind so that I am unable to think about anything else but that irritating noise. I love hearing my toddler because I know him, I know how he plays and how he shows his emotions. I also have some control over him as a parent. I love his voice too, but some other children voice make me mad
I literally just moved my entire family to another county because I couldn’t stand listening to our neighbors blasting loud obnoxious thumping bass from their car parked on the street outside our house. I’d beg them to stop and they’d retaliate by turning it up louder. They were renters, so I reached out to their landlord, and they also did nothing. It was pure torture and torment, because I couldn’t go home to get away from it, because I WAS home. I could literally FEEL the thumping bass throughout my whole body and it rattled my windows and shook my floors, it was THAT loud. My husband (even though I don’t think this was his intent) invalidated my feelings by saying things like “well none of our other neighbors are bothered by it!”. 😤 He’d also say things like “well it’s the middle of the day and they’re not doing anything wrong so you need to get over it!”. Just because you CAN do something doesn’t mean you SHOULD do something. Personally I think people are entitled to peace in THEIR OWN HOMES no matter the hour of the day…but that’s just me. Obviously this is a very deep issue for me.
You did well to move. I moved because my upstairs neighbor would pace for hours. He was crazy and his crazy energy made me incredibly uptight. He was also armed. It's definitely better, however now I suffer from inconsiderate neighbors slamming their doors. I don't feel I can say anything, because it's at a level that wouldn't have bothered me ten years ago. But now I'm a crotchety old man. I don't know these people well enough to even say anything, and they'll probably move before I do anyway. Still, I am considering putting a piece of foam insulation over the inside of my front door, just to cut the level of the noise. The problem in these situations is less autism than barbarianism.
I understand the depth of your issue perfectly. If I get even the faintest whiff of thumping music floating on a stray breeze from several streets away then I feel the anger building and I can't relax. My family just tell me to block it out Ha!, as if I could! Like you my feelings are dismissed by people who just cannot understand the way it gets in your soul. If I'm out somewhere it doesn't have the same effect I think because I know that I can move away from the source of my irritation. If I see somebody else nearby setting up for some sort of gathering at their house my anxiety levels go through the roof in case the music starts.
A few years ago one of my neighbours decided to have a three-day anniversary party. It was sheer hell for me. The authorities didn't want to know about it even though there were a number of laws being broken. When I was single I moved a number of times but there was always some jerk who just had to share their music with the world. I had no refuge, my house was just a shelter not my place of safety. I agree that you should be able to have peace in your own home at any time. Sadly, my wife refuses to move to an environment that is beneficial for me so I guess I'm stuck with others inflicting their life on me.
I'm glad I read your comment, it's nice to know that it's not just me and I'm not a crazy person. Thank you.
You are not alone. I get extremely triggered by the same thing and I hate it that people are so inconsiderate like that. Thankfully I was able to move away from the neighbors that were having their backyard parties late into the night. I also hate fireworks for the same reason and everyone in the whole city goes bonkers on New Years and 4th of July.
Just yesterday, one of the tenants of my building came to me because her neighbors were driving her crazy with their noise. She looked terrible--really burned out. I got the ball rolling to get this sorted out, through pressure from the landlord, and the condo president. When those noisy tenants moved in I thought, "What's up with that landlord? Can't he see what lowlifes these people are?" Luckily they are just renters. It's a lot harder when they are owners. Luckily the bedroom in my own apartment is very quiet. The living room, on the other hand, is exposed to the slamming doors of my inconsiderate neighbors. I'm considering getting a piece of foam to make the front door more soundproof.
My neighbors music reverberates off of my house which also is my bedroom wall and all I hear is the bass
Usually when I need a nap
Unfortunately moving isn't a financial option for me
I didn't hear 'murderous intent' as a feeling when hearing specific sounds. Which is what I feel when people make eating sounds...😅
Saaame.
That's what I feel when I hear television noises. And to make it even worse, I've also got a rare form of synesthesia, where I can feel sounds and "hear" through touch, so that noise is physically painful to me. It really could cause a person to snap...
ME TOO!!!!😂❤🎉
I agree with you here. If anything will make me actually snap, it will be a preventable sound that someone else is making.
Oh I hear that! When the noise is being made by a human for the simple reason that they have no consideration for anyone around them my strong hatred of unfair behaviour kicks in and I honestly don't know how I control myself most of the time. I hate conflict but I won't be walked over either so it's emotionally draining to the extreme. The building next to mine has a private car park and one of the young women that lives there lets her father park his midlife crisis sports car in her space (he doesn't live there). He comes and sits in this ridiculously loud car with the engine idling for between 30 minutes and hour, revving it occasionally before he finally drives it away. I went and politely explained how bad the acoustics are because of all the tall buildings and asked if he could please not do it. He decided to argue with me and call me a liar. Let's just say I had a few choice words for him. No idea how I stopped myself from doing what I wanted to do to him (probably fear of being arrested to be honest) but the shame I felt afterwards, well I'm autistic so it will be with me for the rest of my life
A “weird one” that really irks me is the slapping sound of flip flops as someone walks around. There were a lot of sounds that really got under my skin as a kid. But I didn’t express my frustration properly and got in trouble a lot for disproportionate responses. Usually anger.
Oops.. Well this is odd. I love that sound. I hate squeaking but I love clippity clop. I wonder if there is a sibling to this misophonia.
@@batintheattic7293 why oops? Everyone is different and has different likes and dislikes. No, it was a parent, always wore them on the weekends. I believe I associate the sound with being woken up earlier than I wanted for chores.
Yep, flip flops. Geezus. 🤯
@@Hermitthecoghaha never visit Brazil in that case. Everyone wears them everywhere.
Oh gosh yes. Forgot that one. 😂
Love the channel, thanks so much! I am a 57 year old man living in Montreal who is undiagnosed(self-diagnosed) with Autism and ADHD. Why not get clinically diagnosed? Don't have the resources for private and the mental health care in this city is abysmal(I've tried)THAT said its only through research and channels like yours that I've realized over the last couple of years I check most of the boxes in both categories and have struggled my whole life. NOT stupid, NOT lazy. VERY challenged by this brain. As for sound-I'm a musician who can't listen to music anymore. Unless it's mellow and of MY choosing, music out in the world just about sets me crazy. Now the LIST:
Babies Crying(THIS one causes immediate Anger and flee response while trying to think BE compassionate-the baby is just unhappy or uncomfortable)
Children Shrieking and laughing in the school yard
Ambulance and Fire Truck Sirens
Sudden loud booms from say- a garbage truck
Loud(obnoxious)motorcycles and cars
Flip-Flops Flapping
Snoring
ETC, Etc, Etc......
I DO however love Thunder, even when it causes a major jump.
The struggle IS REAL fine friends. Take care.
@@ScottRyan-Akhi23 totally agree with the sound list (or disagree if you will) 🙈😅
@@ninaandianfan21 💌
Yes to all of these. And coughing. And I also love thunder! That fright makes me laugh 😂
I have the same issues and work with loud cars all day lol. I also love that feeling of thunder though my body. Any weather that muffles or dampens noise is also great. Downpours, fog, and snow are excellent.
I can't handle multiple people talking at the same time. I don't mean people talking over each other, I mean multiple different conversations i.e. at work when we do shift change and people are giving report to each other. This is especially difficult (no offense) to women with higher pitched voices. I just can't handle it. It's like nails on a chalkboard. I'm not sure if this counts, but it's like too much stimulus at the same time. I just want to yell at everybody like a mean librarian.
Or worse, when people are talking overtop of someone else or overtop of you, when you are the one trying to say something. I can't say a full sentence around my family, and then they ask later why I hate socializing.
This is a double slap of annoyance, not only due to the multiple people talking, but now you are either interrupted or fully ignored.
Those exaggerated sounds that the “influencers” use on their videos for TikTok and Reels! I’ve always wondered too why certain noises in movies and tv shows would bother me. Now that I’m diagnosed, it all makes sense.
I didn't actually realize that there was a specific name for this sensation. It saddens me because I have discussed this issue in therapy multiple times, and it has always been related to generalized anxiety. I feel very seen knowing that there is a name for this and that others experience this sensation as well ❤️
Yeah, that sucks because I have generalized anxiety disorder, and my sensitivity to certain sounds is definitely a different thing, although it can make me feel anxious.
Dude, SAME. I don't think it's BECAUSE I'm anxious. If anything, some of the anxiety flows from knowing the restaurant is going to be loud.
I'm in my 50s and I have had these struggles for as long as I can remember. Trying to explain it to someone with the hope of understanding usually proved impossible, often resulting in them occasionally testing me or using the sound against me now that they know my kryptonite. I'm so glad awareness is increasing and am hopeful for the future generation, also crossing fingers that much better understanding and possibly treatments come about within my lifetime. Thanks for the video!
Oh God, the "testing" by doing it again is the single most irresponsible, rude, and immature response!!! And then they get upset at our reaction towards them?! What did they expect?! 😡
Sudden shrieking laughter. God. DAMN.
Omg yeah.
Kamala
@@cecilyerkerlol nice. That image pop into my head too! 😂
Yep- preteen girls. Scary as f
Lawnmowers, leaf blowers, car and motorcycle engines, car doors slamming, walking in the stairway, kid sounds, yelling, breaks squeaking, smacking, certain kind of whispering (for example asmr videos) = 😡⚰😡⚰😡 Most of these are everyday sounds in blocks of flats. Can't afford my own house in the countryside. Life is hell. 🤣
I was once renting from a guy who would leave his dog home alone all day and it had bad separation anxiety and would bark the entire time, 10 hours a day. One week I was there with that with my autistic 6 year old screaming about it all day (home with me 24/7 due to covid being raging) when a new neighbour's car alarm decided this week it would go off every time a bee would so much as fart. As you can imagine, this made my kiddo even crazier. And I have it too, on top of having to keep him calm. All day and night it kept triggering until bylaw(who I'd been calling every night about it) showed up and told them their car would be impounded if they got one more call about it.
Send an email to your housing officer and if they don’t listen then to your local counsellors/MP! I have had this issue with my downstairs neighbour, plus the neighbourhood kids and I have to email them constantly about the shrieking of the children! The other stuff bothers me, but I am able to control it more, but the shrieking from the kids and bouncing of the ball and the ball against the metal fence is 😡🤬😡🤬😡🤬
@@Jae-by3hf I don't know what country you're from but there's no such thing as a 'housing officer' in mine.
Also, "I was ONCE renting," and "All day and night it kept triggering UNTIL..." It's all good now because I don't live there anymore AND because it was resolved already.
Thanks anyway.
I don't think I could/would call because of children, what they're doing is necessary for a human's development.
I can so relate to leaf blowers. I can tolerate any other lawn care sounds more easily but throw a leaf blower in & I have to fight the urge to destroy the equipment. The frequency of the sound & the vibrations make me feel like my brain is gonna explode or I’m gonna go insane
Ah- and in the countryside there is logging dogs leaf blowers - it is better in that I can usually find someplace to freak out wo anyone seeing when I can’t escape the noise- the advantage is no one hears ME when I’m overwhelmed and shrieking for it to stop. Why why why does it activate a rage response?
Shrieking children cause me physical pain. Also horrible are the sounds of cutlery dropped on a plate or when people breathe with their mouths. But I sleep well with the distance sound of a lawn mower.
My 12 year old neighbor plays basketball and the sound of the ball dribbling outside my window drives me mad. And I'm on the second floor with the windows closed, and I can still hear each time the ball hits the pavement perfectly clearly. He's a kid, so I deal with it, but man it sucks.
My stepmom has a set of cockatoos that randomly screech at full volume. It makes me on edge and nervous the entire time that I am at her house.
Something similar for me is we had a dog who would often be around the side of the house. It was about 3 feet wide and a metal fence opposite my window. Even with the window closed, curtains down and blackout screen down, the dog barking would be like a giant needle going straight through my ears. When I knew it was about to happen it sucked, when it was out of nowhere it was tremendously painful.
Yes. My most hated sound is someone rubbing their finger across a balloon. It feels as if someone is taking the filings in my teeth and twisting them in their sockets. And it hangs on for a long time.
I don't have that trigger, BUT that is the most accurate thing to compare that "nail through amygdala" feeling to.
Thanks for articulating what is in my brain that I can't find the words for.
THIS! :D
Damn, I’m glad this isn’t something else that’s messed up for me. Sorry to the sufferers out there!
As usual, Chris, your videos are so full of useful information, and just... humor. I'm very sensitive to sound, always have been. The chaotic sound of a bunch of people in an enclosed and public place (such as a restaurant) all talking at once, is a recipe for overwhelm. I've found darned few people understand this. So, thank you.
And thank you especially for the blooper reels. You remind me each time I see your videos that we can laugh at ourselves; life can be funny, including life with autism.
I worked in print for over 10 years and a sound that kills me is folding paper when people sharpen the crease with their fingers. I cannot stand it. Some other sounds I cannot stand: Florecent lights hum, dragging chairs across the floor, high pitch glitchy sound noises, children screaming or laughing, windchimes. I don't have the crunching eating issue but talking while eating is gross. But some noises just grind me to a halt. This is why working from home is so great. No weird smells and way more control over sound.
@@TwisterTornadoYou just don't have an issue with that one, they do. For example I can withstand the lights and chairs, but HATE mouth noises and love wind chimes. Children are made to get on my nerves it seems.
Every lunch or break room ive encountered in life ive had to avoid. People's resting/eating sounds drive me bananas. i cant relax at all.
Plus people looking and staring... screw that!
My grandpa used to scream sneeze. And the scream came first. Jump scare. Every time.
My dad did it, and I've inherited his explosive sneeze shout.
My mom has loud explosive sneezes. If I'm nearby when she sneezes, I jump out of my skin!
The plate scratching with your friend made me literally gasp, three times hahaha thats one of my most triggering sounds. Well played 👏
For me, its the sound and feeling of puffy jackets or sleeping bags or anything adjacent.
I’m so glad this isn’t just me. The worst sounds for me are someone eating soft fruits. It gets really bad if that person has a cold too so they’re breathing through their mouth whilst eating. If there’s something in the background, like the TV or radio, it does lessen the intensity of the aggravation I feel.
Banana eating is the worst…even eating them myself makes me want to gag.
Oh yes. Slurping, snuffling and squelching. You got very specific with it! :D
I had to find my dog a new home because he had this sharp piercing bark, and he was a very anxious dog (Pomchi) so the slightest sound outside of a car or someone at our door would send him into a fit. It got to the point that I was having an anxiety attack every time he heard something outside. It also didn't help that he was extremely possessive of me and wanted to stay right under my feet at all times, so I could hardly get a moment's peace.
At least you rehomed responsibly, most people don't exactly have the energy or don't care enough (about the animal) DUE to the issues.
If i have money and free time, im just settling for a nice quiet lizard.
For me its when there's two or more pieces of music playing at once. It's most common in shops. Either there's different music playing on different floors and there's a point where the two pieces overlap. Or there might be one piece playing in the shop and another in the shopping centre outside.
Sometimes you get loud buskers out in the street and some shops will still play their music and I don't know how people don't just run outside.
I have never been able to articulate what it feels like to experience, but all I can do is clamp my hands over my ears and get away as quickly as possible.
My whole life I have HATED hearing people eat especially when they don't close their mouth while eating. I told myself that I didn't like it because I was taught that you are meant to shut your mouth while eating. I now realise I have misophonia, and also that people were breaking the rule of etiquette.
Those people should be punished for being rude
Finger nails on a chalk board....for those that need to understand the refrence lol I say that cuz MOST people dislike that sound. Mine is to many things going at the same time. If a TV is on and a radio in another room and then people talking all at the same time I internally start to freak out and have to go somewhere where there's only 1 thing going on. My brain can't decide which sound is the most important to focus on and it overwhelms it exponentially...
If I miss this, it isn’t because I didn’t think it was important. Rather, I didn’t hear the multiple alarms I set, and somehow missed seeing Al the vibrant, eye catching sticky notes I left everywhere. 😢. Truly.
We love seeing your comments and your ongoing support! And no worries - it'll happen one of these days!
Any thudding base sound, unfortunately for me. So music with loud base, my own surround sound system when an intro or movie scene includes base, or anything similar just pounds against my nervous system and may be worse than water boarding! I legit become enraged until it stops or I stop it. Definitely a feeling similar to claustrophobia. It's so bad and unfortunately so prevalent that I bought a house and moved waaay out of city limits just to get away from that particular trigger.
Also the wet, sticky, churning sound of food in the mouth, like when someone eats a candy bar. I make MY OWN SELF angry with this one. Not even the loud humming of my fridge and the air being forced through the ac vents can blend it out.
The other thing that feels like a cheese grater to the nerves is shoe dragging. The sound of someone's sole creating that scrapping sound across dirt and flooring makes me want to punch them or scream "Pick up your 🤬 feet!! It's not that hard!"
I could go on but I won't.
Totally agree with the thudding bass sounds.
Chris, thank you so much for your inclusion and explanation of misophonia. My partner is autistic and will not eat out in restaurants. Nor do we eat together at home, and now I have more of an understanding why. She also has acute hearing and any repetitive sound that is not normal will often make her really angry. (Pigeons constantly cooing on the roof as an example.) In part I already understand as I have hyperacusis, which is when loud sounds penetrate tinnitus, and physically and mentally produce a shock. Thanks once again, and I find I am understanding more, every time I watch a new video of either yourself or Debby.
Oh Lord. I missed the first part when you were live, so I had to hear what sound you played. I always thought the problem was with ME. Hearing certain sounds like that, I get a moment of vertigo, even a "brain zap" and my teeth feel like I've bitten into a tinfoil sandwich. Sometimes it's even the phrases people use, not just sounds. Ex: something super wonderfully gleeful and cheesy that feels disingenuous. I just can't put my finger on that. It's like "cringing" taken up 10 levels and felt throughout. Add in a sucky chewy sound and I'm toast 😭
Thank you for all the videos Chris and Debby. As a late diagnosed autistic (6 weeks ago at 30 yo) it's been a great resource!
Really appreciate that! Hope you'll find more of the videos helpful because I remember so clearly being at the same spot as you, not that long ago. The more you learn about your brain, the better you'll be able to accommodate it and figure out what you need to thrive 🙂
@@ChrisandDebby the services after diagnosis in the UK "suck" (as you would put it 🤣) so TH-cam have been great
Being told you're autistic at 30 and that's why you have had so many issues, then rushed out the door and left to yourself - it's some challenge!
A weird one I've experienced is when somebody is talking and they CLEARLY need to clear their throat and they DONT..... and they KEEP. TALKING.
🤨🤨🤨🤨
For me it’s so bad, that I can’t even look at someone eating. Because I know the sound is there. And if I wear my in ears then I can hear the sound of me eating which isn’t much better 😂 My mom would always yell at me for saying that her eating was bothering me, which obviously was not helpful 😅 I also can’t listen to the radio or podcasts because I am filled with rage when the speaker’s mouth is either too wet, or too dry. You know, old people mouth sounds like them liking their lips or their disgusting tongue sticking to the roof of their mouth. The worst part is, I echolalia stim alllll the time, and I’m so worried it triggers others 😢
THE FORK SCRATCHING THE PLATE IS SO BADDD 😭😭💀💀 but what really gets me is chewing. Not the crunchy chewing, but specifically the like creamy food or like soft food chewing. When it hate it with all types of chewing, IS WHEN THEY BREATH LOUDLY WHILE CHEWING LOUDLY ITS THE WORST IT MAKES ME ALMOST GET A HEADACHE JUST THINKING ABOUT IT AAAA 😭😭
I don't even like to say the one sound that really REALLY makes me cringe inside of my skin. It makes my joints ache. And typically takes my producing a different more pronounced sound to override the sensory discomfort of this other sound. Paper being ripped, tape being removed from cardboard, and other similar sounds. My last several office jobs were a minefield for overwhelm.
Chewing with mouth open, smacking lips and loud crunching! 😝😝😝
I love the sound of crunching. And walking on gravel. I become aggravated by fans and clocks ticking.
one of the most common triggers for me is overlapping sound, particularly music or TV/movie. Hearing music or a show and then someone comes in playing music on their device or another car has a really loud system pumping, or talking over what I'm watching or listening to.
Loud, high pitched noises are the worst for me. I have to stop myself from yelling “That’s not going to make it get here any faster!!!” to people at work who repeatedly press the button for the elevator 😂
This is such a good explanation. I struggle to explain it all the time. Thanks Chris!
I had to pull over multiple times on my road trip yesterday to stop a rattle in the back of the van. The million needles description is perfect. I also can't go to the movie theater in my community because of the lobby. It has an arcade, and the noise echoes in my brain. If i have to go, i bring headphones and blast music. I buy tickets online and show up seconds before the theater seats are opened. I also don't buy popcorn or anything unless someone else gets it for me. The second i am in the theater space, i am fine. My child is also paranoid about chewing with his mouth because of my reaction to his noise. I also broke up with someone because they thought chewing popcorn loudly was cute.
I will read those research links. Thanks for this post.
I tried the earplugs that allow some sounds through but not all, and those work on overload days when i have to drive and there are rattles in the van.
I hate when ac units are starting to break. Loud vibrations I can feel in my bones.
Sniffling is my trigger noise, and it made school absolute hell. I was crying during tests because I couldn't focus with the sound going on around me, and my class schedule ended up getting changed one year because a classmate was bullying me over it to the point that it became a classroom disruption.
Hearing someone eat soup is just is bad for me. It’s the slurping that gets me.
That's why like to wait till it is cool enough to just drink it after eating any big solids. So I don't tend to eat it out of the house lol.
I am seriously though so happy you posted this.
I never see much on misophonia and I'm quite sure Im autistic.
Will get diagnosed hopefully soon.
I just realized, this is part of the reason I hated driving so much once my stereo broke. My initial problem is, i'm completely obsessed with music. Second, it always reminded me of those scenes in movies where everything gets really quiet right before an accident. And lastly, I can now hear the sound of the motor running. I cannot stand the sound, large or small. I actually find the sound of all motors terrifying. It really brings on a fight or flight response. I completely stopped driving, but there were a number of reasons for that as well. I get so overwhelmed when i'm out of my house, it's really hard to keep track of all the triggers. Wish I had a light-weight space suit lol. Thank you, this really makes me feel validated.
The first 30 seconds of this video were a ride man. I nearly shut it off, then you pulled it back and told me everything I wanted to hear, haha, but hoowee, that was a rollercoaster.
5:55 is my favorite Chris moment ever. Lol. Love your work buddy. Thx for everything!
My prediction is tinnitus and having to filter out phantom noise while also struggling to filter out environmental noise. 😑
Ooh that's also a tricky one and you're very close! The filtering out of noises is challenging (and misunderstood) too
@@ChrisandDebbylove this video. Can you discuss the connection between hyperacusis and adhd and autism…?
Sadly, I dont think it's possible for anyone who doesn't have misophonia to truly understand it. I've locked myself in a school bathroom and slammed my head into the wall because I had a teacher who wouldnt stop chewing gum in class no matter how many times I tried to explain it to her, and after that, even my family still believed I was just being dramatic.
Everyone has sounds and other stimuli that bother them. But there is a huge difference between being annoyed by a sound, versus that sound literally driving you to self injury.
As a fellow person with misophonia, i love this video. I have watched thons of videos, no one has eaven been close to as good as this one. Thank you so mutch❤️
I just read this comment to my wife because it really made my day. Thanks a bunch for sharing 😍😍
@@ChrisandDebby oh i love that
I’m recently self-diagnosed and realizing that my parents were almost certainly on the spectrum too. My mom had major misophonia in particular…
Same..and my Dad had the misophonia…especially with eating and walking sounds.
I am self-diagnosed as well, I'm sure my mom is slightly on the spectrum too.
The one that sets me off is the backup alarm on commercial vehicles. My place of employment is in a cluster of warehouse buildings, and I can hear them all day long. I started using loop ear plugs. They work good and I can still hear people talking to me.
An interesting addition to my misophonia is I still experience the effects even when I turn down the volume if there is a visual element.
If I even see the source of the sound or potential sound like someone chewing or an animal licking I still feel ill and highly agitated.
Also the distant sound of a base note rumbling my house induces anger. It’s like I’m stuck in a drum being torture. 😓
Sounds that leave me feeling like there's either an existential threat to me or someone else leave me panicking or feeling disgusted and highly distressed.
Sirens of emergency vehicles - especially ambulances - upset me several times a day. Very common to autistics, and piercingly and painfully high-pitched and loud. I think its also partly because of the worry for any people in danger.
Any mucussy mouth or nose sounds - disgusting and, I believe it's ancient response against perceived contamination by germs.
I also have the eating disorder ARFID, which sometimes correlates to autism, and this phobia is part of that.
The sound of the night when I wanna sleep upsets me: I'm listening out for spiders.
Traffic sounds - especially motorbikes or cars revving - are also extremely upsetting, possibly because it seems relentless, selfish and it creates pollution. Again, it leaves me feeling drained, upset and burnt out.
Please be thoughtful when you do stuff, peeps, when you can. Modern life has to happen, but spare a thought for others, autistic or otherwise, who may feel sensory distress at your actions.
Thank you 🥰
You know I like the night sounds for one good reason. Little bugs and amphibians get quiet when they deal with predators around. If only one toad or frog suddenly stops, they just caught something (they love spiders btw).
I have had misophonia since I was a teen. It's the worst with the people close to me.
It's so so bad I have meltdowns super often.
The anger part is horrendous.
I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.
Beeps, boops, rings, bells, chimes, text to speech, and robot sounds make crazy.
I don’t think I’ve ever heard of misophonia but this was an interesting video about it. I’ve been really enjoying your content Chris and Debby.
I'm autistic and have sensory processing disorder and I'm sensitive to a lot of different sensory inputs including sound. I would say that the single thing that has helped me to manage noise sensitivity the most is an alternative therapy called Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) aka Tapping.
Fireworks used to be a huge trigger for me and I found EFT shortly before the 4th of July in 2019. I started using it and was able to get through the holiday virtually stress free when in previous years I'd be on the floor in a full meltdown. I also find it easier to manage things like crying children in grocery stores.
I absolutely still have noise sensitivity, but the severity is nowhere near what it used to be before I started using EFT. I think EFT is really great for people on the autism spectrum, especially those that find stimming helpful, because the tapping you do with EFT is like a controlled form of stimming. You can learn to do EFT with very little training from free videos on TH-cam, but there are also inexpensive courses on it on sites like Udemy.
I love your sense of humor. 😂 Thank you. Always amazing to watch your videos 🎉 Learning alot of consideration to peoples needs through you. Can always improve on that sensitivity
Thanks for spreading the word that this is a REAL THING experienced by many people and it’s not just me being “too sensitive” again. I work hard to push thru and stay civil. But it’s hard! And yes taking good care of yourself definitely helps make everything easier, but it’s still a struggle. I’m late diagnosed ADHD. But since I was a young kid the eating sounds of my dad, specifically, would drive me crazy. Sometimes his breathing sounds too. Now as an adult I feel angry at my poor husband whenever he’s eating or drinking near me. He also frantically scrapes his plate to get every last drop of sauce and I just want to scream! Also when my cat is grooming her paws by biting her claws, I just have to leave the room.
For me cardboard boxes are a massive trigger. The sounds of cardboard pieces rubbing against each other as well as the sound of ripping the cardboard box into pieces or folding it. Touching the cardboard is equally as unpleasant; I feel it in my spinal cord and I have to shake it off every time. Same issue with a styrofoam...omg this plus cardboard is a pure torture.😖
I definitely have this problem. Great videos by the way!
It's the cutlery clanking together and scraping the plate for me. Instant rage.
As a child I used to get really angry at my mum during breakfast because she was chewing too loud (as an late diagnosed autistic person I now understand why because i was always told not to make a fuss) and restaurant eating, eating in public or with family is still a big problem and I get exhausted and frustrated from the masking. My feelings are mainly disgust and anger because I feel trapped and frustrated because it is not polite to yell at people that they should chew somewhere else. Also ticking clocks are a huge thing that make my brain melt and make me want to throw things. THE worst is people chewing gum. I can't even find words how awful that is.
Thank you so much for this. This is the best explanation I've seen on this.. I have a few things that just set me off. Like biting ice or Popsicles or biting of apples. They sent chills up my spine and give me goose bumps.. even just thinking of the sounds do this. And I love apples.. this makes me super sad. Then there are situational sounds, like someone humming or singing to themselves that just sends my brain into a rage because it's so distracting and needless noises.... but.. I love hearing the choir at church or singing in music... I don't know why there is such a difference.
Chris ! New here and so glad finding ur channel !
I’m almost 60 and very high masking late non diagnosed. Sensory overload busting me wide open in later yrs. I have a curse ! It’s called TINNITUS !!
It keeps me on edge every awake moment. Any sharp clinking noise puts me trough roof. Dishes, cups n plates.
Now plastic in my house…😢
Thank you for this video, I've just learned that I'm a misophone in addition to my hyperacusis. Ever since I was little I couldn't stand the same noises described in the video. I used to go crazy at the dinner table and get a spanking if I didn't keep quiet. The noises were so intense. Over time I just got used to it. As a result, I've been stuck in my house for over 3 years now, unable to live because the sound of a bird or wind drives me crazy.... I live in France and the appointments are long (usually 6 months waiting time for a specialist). I've been applying the solutions suggested in the videos for some time now and it's really relieving, but I think psychological follow-up is necessary in my case. I've probably pulled too hard on the string. In short, thank you very much for your videos, I'm making more progress in identifying my symptoms with you than with any doctor I've seen in over 3 years. By the way, the official diagnosis for autism usually takes more than 3 years, but thanks to you I was able to be sure and since I've been following your advice I'm starting to feel better.
Thank you so much
I muted the moment I saw you were going to eat. This is a big reason why we watch TV while having dinner.
That’s interesting, I found those sounds at the beginning nostalgic and warm and reminiscent of warm memories.
I don’t recall really having any major negative reactions to any specific sensory things for a long time.
This is interesting to me, as I never realised it was associated with emotions. I get huge sensory responses to sound (e.g. top of my spine shivers in response to certain sudden sounds - I've suppressed them in the past but since my diagnosis I've tried hard not to). Your video has made me realise how much anxiety (which I've always ignored as normal) is related to sounds etc.
The second I saw the food in the beginning my brain was like NO!!
For me personally, when any of these sounds that I can't handle pop up, it's like different sounds are in different "audio channels" and the second one of "the sounds" start, all other audio channels are turned down, while the one with "the sound(s)" is/are turned up extremely much. Mostly I have to either focus hard to endure it until it's over if I know it's temporary or short, or I have to leave the room if I think it might take a while.
Some of these sounds for me are the wet food lip smacking and chewing (I'm fine with crunching noises thankfully), also the fork on plate scratching, some fabrics rubbing against each other like rain coat fabric (horrible). Terror sound bonus: Once in a laboratory the lid of the centrifuge was broken and everyone concluded "let's just leave it off until it's fixed" and every time the centrifuge was being used, it produced a terribly loud screeching/screaming sound and I had to leave the room every time.
I found this a very relatable and interesting video! I haven't seen that many people talk about this. Thank you!
Love your sense of humor
My misophonia when it comes to wet chewing sounds makes it feel like centipedes or other bugs are crawling in my ears and causes an immediate need to flee. This has hurt my family’s feelings but enduring that sound is simply torture
Omg, this is totally me. I can go from "happy go lucky" to feelings rage just from the sound of someone eating or breathing... heavy metal music is also immediately causes anxiety and anger.
I've had this ever since I can remember
Don't let the fear response win!Training my brain that any angle grinders & weed hackers outside my classroom aren't trying to kill me has been quite a ride. By sticking through it (after closing the door), asking my students for patience & letting myself shakily forge forth, I've gone from being mute & frozen to being teary or shakey while trying to teach. The triggers don't last for many minutes & I am extra tired afterwards.
Good talk! Thanks!
Thanks, Chris, for the info. 💛
This is exactly why my mini clip mp3 player is one of the best purchases I've ever made, that along with some wired earbuds have made being out in the world so much easier to handle. I'm basically never without them and will continue to replace them anytime they break down from so much usage.
You are a wonderful teacher 😊
Interesting information
Helpful information.
Thank you!! I didn't know about this, but I hated the coughing sound as a kid with every fiber of my being (I still do now but look less bothered). I would curl and imagine tearing things up. Didn't help with my dad being a smoker and would do the crunchy throat clearing and half cough that you know would mean there's more to come :(( I thought I was a brat until watching this video. I also thought everyone hates that sound so I suppressed all my coughs growing up lol
Misophonia SUUUUCKS!!!!!!! While certain sound triggers have remained constant for me, when I am particularly overstimulated, other sounds can become too much. Sadly, even the voices of people I love can become awful. I'm so glad I got my earplugs!
2:35 Sounds like my Tinnitus as well. Makes me want to claw into my brain and rip out the sound.
Kyle Hill released a video a few years ago title 'Autism is my superpower.' He went on to explain his experience, including misophonia, and it was THAT that led me to my eventual self-diagnosis.
I had this worse as a young person. I've found context has a lot to do with my sensitivity to certain sounds. Decades of listening to all sorts of leftfield music, IDM and the like, trained my ears and conditioned my acceptance of certain sounds elsewhere in life, especially if they're in anyway close to repetitive/rhythmical. My tolerance is way higher than my autistic friend who hasn't exposed themselves to copius amounts of Autechre and Panasonic since late teens. But it still gets me from time to time 😣
Dogs barking, bass beats, lawnmowers (in Germany!), radio and motorcycles make me nuts. I have also great aversion for overaccoustic spaces and bad quality stereo devices. I percieve all the resonances, yuk…
The repetitive sounds and visuals of steam trains chuffing is the best. Like mentally pealing new protective plastic wrap off anything new.
If I could buy film covered plastic or metal on Amazon I would be broke. 😊
The sound of Percussion Maracas made me ill once.
I felt like when I had the flu with high fewer for hours afterwards.
It was quite shocking because I didn't experience strong reactions to sound before.
Yes forks on plates. Also flies, mosquitoes, and strangely the beeps made at a self serve register at a supermarket is really painful as well as stressful.
Yes!!! Thanks for talking about this!!