This is just someone's internal thoughts without any external context. It makes most of this not make sense. No explanation of who the characters are or all of the relationships. At the end why the sudden changes from first person perspective to third person and back. Needs transitions to convey changes in time and location.
This is just someone's internal thoughts without any external context. It makes most of this not make sense. No explanation of who the characters are or all of the relationships. At the end why the sudden changes from first person perspective to third person and back. Needs transitions to convey changes in time and location.
I'm Sorry if it's hurt you.
@@StoryHeaven-r4u The lack of context is not hurt. It is honesty about the story lacking key points.
TH-camers for example