Men in My Family Are The Reason of My Nightmares | Surviving A Life of Violence
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 26 มี.ค. 2023
- Today on Unfiltered Stories, our guest Rene Fenwick shares the story of her surviving her life full of trauma, abuse and violence. Her story which resembles a set of nightmares, begins in such a young age when she was sexually abused by some men in her family. Rene, being a kid had to grow up while trying to make sense why a lot of men in her life tries to take advantage of her. Her story of survival and perseverance will inspire you.
#Survivor #Family #truelifeline
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YT: www.youtube.com/@ReneFenwicka...
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Do you have an inspiring story to share? Contact us at unfilteredstories@jellysmack.com
I will email you soon......
Yes I have my story to tell
I'm a 52 yr old woman and I have a story to tell. Watching your videos is giving me a little bit of courage with each one I watch. The day is coming when I to will share mine with the world.
I feel sorry for ppl that have been sexual abused.I just want this lady to start naming ppl .Like my brother got in my 🛌 etc or Uncle Joe etc.Not family member. Who???¿?
@@demontate4623 she’s not fully recovered from the trauma
These abusers NEVER let go. Even if they’re in a new relationship with new children, married, and picture happy, THEY FOREVER WANT POWER AND CONTROL OVER A FORMER TARGET.
Yup
I was always told after my 3rd sexual assault that rape doesn't happen to someone 3 different times by 3 different people. I told my daughter I think why it happened to me so many times by different men, was because after my mom's brother molested me from age 3-7 it gave me an invisible mark only monsters could see. It told those other men that I was an easy target. Thank you so much for your bravery and sharing your remarkable story of your bravery. I hope you are healing and happy, maybe there is hope for me to.
Omg it happened to me 3 different men
I believe this too if people close to you do it it's a signal some people use to not respect you I don't believe though women attract this it's the norm of patriarchy how everyone goes on acting as if it's not is beyond me
Ideally the only way women can be "safe" in patriarchy is by marriage and dating a way of choosing a "lesser evil" because men can be possessing of property
The young guys in prison are run through by hundreds of men.
Yes 3 different rapist and all of my relationships have been horribly abusive.
I absolute hate when adults call children "grown" , "fast"... Women do this because theyve likely been abused and carry blame so they put the blame on a child who may seem precocious, a child that has likely been molested too. It's disgusting.
I doubt that’s why for 100% of cases and I also feel that to hate a term like that is over dramatic.
@@maverickbull1909 🌼That is exactly why the evil women do it. They're happy that it's not them now. This is an, "It's your turn now." mentality.
@@maverickbull1909 @mels is entitled to use whatever terms she chooses, also to express her opinion and what she says & the way she says it is valid and there is space for it here; hopefully a place for healing, acceptance, growth and very importantly open minds.🙏🏿
@@maverickbull1909 “Hate” is appropriate bc whn adult women turn thr noses up, roll thr eyes at, & talk about you, it’s traumatic and has long lasting consequences. I was a good girl but was shapely. Older female relatives body shamed & called me fass & sneaky (sneaky bc they never heard anything about me). I HATED my body & had many insecurities. Whn I look at old pics/videos, I was gorgeous. I wish I knew that then. My baby girl is just like me. Of course, here come blk women with thr toxicity, but I’m her 🦸🏾♀️ superhero. Because of my experiences, I’m aware of the signs. This is my response whn I feel that she is being judged for just existing, “It’s highly inappropriate, almost perverse for older women to look at & sexualize young girls. Don’t do that to my baby. We don’t body shame, over here.”
Why do I feel like many can relate to this, sad but true
I think her biological brothers were her abusers. Her older brother told his friend to come over and get her.
See why I don’t trust none them !!!
@@thawwtpoettt 🐞Yep, I keep my daughter away from situations like that.
@@robinwelch2265 It can happen anywhere. Those who do not experience that are lucky. We must protect but the abusers are sick in mind.
I wonder why she didn’t say what relative
@@chanelcampbell3032 she’s not fully healed , or recovered from the trauma she suffered during her childhood years she still holding on…. The more she talked about it eventually she will say who it was.
Black women, we need to normalize telling the truth about these toxic black male figures in our life. Stop trying to protect these abusive bandits and call them out on their foolishness.
Not just black women… ALL WOMAN AND MEN!! THOSE WHO HAVE SUFFERED LIKE THIS YOUNG WOMEN, CALL YOUR ABUSER(S) OUT!! WE ARE HERE FOR YOU!!
Us Latinas accept this behavior too! Its definitely a huge issue ! So sad
@@corephobic It’s worse when it comes to black women bc black women are literally groomed from birth to not speak about anything a black man does. If we do, we get punished for it. Every black woman family member that I have has been molested or SA’d by a black man and that’s a problem. But yes. All men should be called out.
We’re talking about black women stop trying to shift the conversation from the topic at hand. Smh
@@PoliticalAbstract I said what I said.
Y’all l! These brave people are telling their traumatic story to help us! Don’t let it be in vain. Talk to your kids about not speaking up when someone tries to touch them or act inappropriate with them or tries to make the kids touch/act inappropriately. Let them know it’s ok to say no to adult or older kids. Teach you kids to use their voice, to speak up with strength. Let them know that some may try to silence them with threats. Trust no one when it comes to kids!
All THIS! Thank You👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
I am 60yrs old. This fine lady is the strongest woman I have ever known. May God bless this soul.
He wasn’t a “Great” father. He was horrible human being all around…I’m sorry ❤
Agreed.
If you love your children then no matter how much you hate their mother when them kids are around you BOTH treat eachother with respect.. argue all you want while their not in the home. My parents were having marital issues for 15 years I never new until I was 25 when my mom came to me sat me down and said it’s time you know your dad and I have been broken up for a decade but stayed so yoh and your sister wouldn’t be affected! We truly never ever new they always acted married and loving around us! I’m so sorry they felt they had to stay together so my sister and I wouldn’t be affected but I’m grateful as a black women I grew up with both loving parents in the home
@@jupitersworld244 No such a thing dear!! I don’t know which one of them did, but somebody sacrificed their decade for you. You shouldn’t think that’s a great thing. And most that I know wouldn’t think their parents being unhappy for a decade is a great thing. As I said, I don’t know your parents, and I’m not Igoing to spill my own life like everybody likes to do, because personal experiences do not matter. Facts matter. You cant just ignore facts based on your own life. In the court of law, statistically, generally, women deal with cheating and abuse while sacrificing themselves for their kids. 90% Of the time that it’s always on a woman while men go out and live their lives. Why would you want your parents, either one, to lose who their are? Why would you want them to suffer silently? And just for your info, one can only do that when both do that… you can keep quiet only so long while the other half uses the kids to pick sides. This video isn’t about those who amicably, respectfully treat each other. This is about most where one parent does everything to cause chaos. WOMEN NEED TO VALUE THEMSELVES MORE…. You Can’t Abuse the person who gave you the kids and is raising them and at the same time say you LOVE those kids… Girls grow up thinking that it’s normal to give up who they are, that all men are violent and cheaters and end up in the same cycle. Plz read the statistics on how many live peacefully without knowing anything. VERY VERY small… Society is influencing the instability in families. When family’s aren’t valued, when one job isn’t enough to support, when throwing grandparents in the homes and childcare is through the roof. Education, healthcare… there’s is a lot more stresses on the family. This is why I’m norther Europe quality of life is better, because society prioritizes its citizens… Things aren’t all black and white…. There’s a huge grey area..
So sad... I never want to get married or have children. I just want to take care of my own life and everyday society is getting worst. Horrific experiences...
Men are horrific to women. Animals. So many damaged women who have been targeted as little girls. All these women men complain about are victims of male savagery. Black men destroy homes.
Such a good guy…….!!!!!!
I said the same thing now I see why my dad was and still overprotective of me people are just so evil
Thank God you got out we are survivors about seventeen years ago I had a boyfriend shot and killed himself in front of me try to kill me but thank God I'm still here and I am with a wonderful man now.
I dont know you but i am Thankful your still here God bless you 🙏
I don't know who you are, but I'm happy you're still alive.
@@StarJohnnyProductions Same ❤
I feel bad that she can't even say it was her brothers that abused her and set her up to be raped
Right! She said, “my family member” let him in. AND she also said, “I screamed and my family member never came out of the room.” Come on! We all know that she’s trying hard to protect her brother, for whatever reason. I feel bad for her traumatic life. But I’m so glad she’s doing much better now!
Your “family member” SET YOU UP to be gRAPED. I H8 that this happened to you. Much healing and great fortune to your soul.🙏🏼
I feel like the best way I can protect my daughter is to educate her about sex, about people, about not being intimidated into silence.
They got a law now talking about kids can’t even talk about periods. N I got mines in elementary school. So I’m trying to teach her that early on to. Because I didn’t know what was happening to me. Another girl told me it’s your period go ask a teacher for a pad.
I wish you were my sister. I would have never let any of these men abuse you. The three separate men that put hands on me ended up calling the police on me for their own protection 🤣. One actually drove to the police station to press charges on me 😂🤣. And, they hit me first. I have always been a fighter. More physical when I was younger. Now I fight with prayer. GOD bless you, in Jesus Christ mighty name. ❤️🙏🏾😇
Keep speaking your truth, so you can save others. Such a brave soul! Peace, love and blessing to you!!!
I'm so happy you made it through all of that toxicity...no he wasn't a great dad,he was a great groomer.
Word.
Right. No good dad would abuse the mother of his children and expose his child to abuse.
Boundaries learn boundaries, they're grooming you from the start.
Sometimes belonging to a family can be the source of all your traumas😢
This sounds a lot like my family and after studying and praying! God showed me that my family has a generational curse of abuse. I heard stories from my mom saying how my grandfather was a molester and how he would beat my grandmother. My aunts and mom got into abusive relationships and my mom was raped. I started seeing the curse coming into my life so I started praying against it that the cycle will stop with me and my kids.
Amen 🙏🏻 ❤❤
I feel like whatever family member that was home with her, set her up.
You were a beautiful baby girl! I'm sorry this happened to you! You deserved to be safe and loved,I hope you find some light during dark times!!
You are a strong, courageous and inspirational woman. Your story will help many!
You are an amazing person! So sorry this happened to you. 😢 very happy you got rescued and have turned your energy to being an activist against Child Marriage!!
The truth is you kept getting raped because the rapists knew your family did not care about you. Sorry to say that and you did not deserve that, its very disturbing you went through all that, and Im so sorry you went through too much.
The rapists were her family members
I've also been sexually and physically abused by men for a lot of my life. I told my aunt that I'd feel uncomfortable if a trans woman was in a locker room with me. I don't want trans women to be allowed into a female locker unless they completely transitioned and no longer had a penis. I told her if I walked in there and saw a naked, adult male standing there, it'd trigger my PTSD. It'd make me feel extremely vulnerable if I was dressing and a trans woman walked in. My aunt told me I was discriminating against trans women and that they'd be really hurt if they went into a male's locker room. I want trans people to feel safe, but I want to feel safe too. Is that discrimination towards them? My aunt has totally made me feel bad about it! I'm curious to hear what other abuse survivors think.
Its wrong hun your Aunty just wants you to not stand up for the truth cause she doesnt want to listen. Transgender are confused they dont even know where to be. This is an eye opener to me smh
No, you should not have to see full male genitalia in female spaces. Today’s society is creating rape culture by allowing perverts into female only spaces just because they claim to be trans. Newsflash!!! If they want to keep their male genitalia, they do not truly have gender dysphoria and are not truly trans. Women are being set up to be abused and raped with no protections.
The penis has been a violent weapon against women since time began (and children and men too) and I do not think anybody with a penis should be in a women’s space no matter how they “feel” ! Don’t feel bad for thinking about that. You’re the reason women need to stand up to this nonsense!
Sending you love and 🙏🏻 prayers ❤
Umm…your safety takes precedence over some randos feelings!! They need their own damn locker rooms, why dafuq do they NEED to be around women and girls in such a vulnerable position?? Your aunt is a weirdo 😊
@@jomac3120fact.
Sad, til this day she's still protecting her in house abuser. Imma say it's her brother. He has gone on to victimize others. They ALWAYS do. Let's normalize outing abusers regardless of relationship. It would help so many others avoid being victimized.
14:52 Please stop referring to this man and your father as a "great father". Great fathers don't abuse their wives and mothers of their children...
I’m glad someone said it!! It’s weird that we still give endearing titles (dad,mom, etc) to real monsters!!! I’m glad this lady was able to share her story tho😊
THIS is the problem. Story after story of neglectful or abusive fathers and mothers who accept this to have a man. What kind of man? Any man? Pedophilic men who are only with you for access to your daughter? What a joke. They think that's how all men act. Why do they think this? Because it's all they know. The stories of incest are freaking unbelievable. Statistically, a lot of these folks are going to go on to SA kids too. It's up to MOTHERS to protect children because the men don't...won't.
A lot of times children are pressured into saying this about lousy parents, also they think, because they clothed and housed them they're so great.🙁
I have a similar childhood story. I’m so happy you got out
You are so strong! Thank you for sharing. Maybe one day I will be as brave as you to tell my story
You are a beautiful soul inside and out. I am so sorry you had to go through this. You are a strong and brave woman. I wish you well.
My momma always told me she trust me .. but she DONT TRUST PPL.
I am getting that her abuser was her brother.
I guess too. 😓 Wish her nothing but love and light and sending prayers her way ❤
I know it’s not a majority but how are there so many men like that? And how do they continue to get away with things?
I love your confidence and honesty this will for sure touch many people. God Bless you Queen ❤
I was 19yrs old when I got into abusive relationship and he was older and controlling for 7 years it’s no joke to try to escape or leave 😮til this day it’s hard even been gone for a Year Single to get rid of the Trauma
😢 I am so sorry for what people did to you. Because of your living nightmare, others will probably not have to go through that insanity. Evil exists.
You are a survivor! Such a strong woman. God bless you.
You are so strong and beautiful. Thank you for sharing your story. Your very brave and I wish you nothing but love happiness and peace
I am so sorry you went through such a terrible childhood which lead to horrible incidents in your adult life. I could not listen to your story without tears rolling down my cheeks. Its not your fault. As a child the brain is not fully formed and you cannot make sense of the world around you. Thank you for having the courage to share your story. You did not confirm who the members of your family who were sexually abusing you. I believe you need to speak and let people know who they are. We need to protect other children from these dangerous predators. Your a beautiful, strong woman. I pray continuous healing over your family ❤❤🙏🏾
I'm sorry, but any man who beats his child's mother is NOT a good father. That same man can turn on his child. My mom used to say the same thing about the guy she called my father and when I was 4 she protected me with her body the 1st time he went after me. Fortunately, we got away from him after that.
I went thru the same pain. Especially being called grown & hot at the age of 4yrs old and up by my tormentors and their siblings.
I am so sorry.
She is so strong...
This is astronomically insane and extremely sad that most of the men in her life either raped or molested her.
I relate to this so much it’s hard I’m still trying to cope and trying to deal with my childhood trauma
Best of luck. You hang in there. These crimes should be punishable by death It’s sickening.
GOD was definitely with you
What a STRONG WOMAN
God bless you your a true Survivor, I could relate from my childhood till now thank you for sharing. Just watching you sharing your life trauma brought so many memories to me. Stay safe and God bless you you’re a warrior.🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
I had to slip sleeping medication into my cooking for dinner and wait for him to fall asleep and grab my things and left at 3 am. Scariest time of my life , it was almost like a scary movie while he was sitting there sleeping and I’m packing my things. Praying he doesn’t wake up. I’m free now and in a great healthy relationship ❤❤❤
You are a strong woman now helping others who listen to you God bless you and your family
So many of us manipulated and uninformed. Fathers should def teach their daughters how to protect themselves from predators but if they too busy doing wrong how could they?? Hold your head up women.
@kell definitely seems like it😢
God Bless her soul 🙏🏽 lord keep blessing her to be strong and to help others.
Girl u been through a lot, but thanks to the Lord u got out, and brave enough to tell ur story.
Keep trusting GOD He will heal ur pain and deliver u.
The thing is they are Not good fathers of they are abusing the mother, especially in front of the children.
Exactly
I never allowed my son around anyone but my mom and dad. I knew they were safe because i grew up in a safe home with 3 brothers. I never knew this was so common. So sickening.
Bless you for this story, what an amazingly insightful woman, mother you are. I wish you all the contentment, peace of mind and happiness that you can find within 🧡🧡
🙏 Thank you for telling you story - it is painful but I wish you healing and a hopeful example to others.💙 Yes, please keep telling the world your story.🕊
Im proud of her because so many women have rape happen multiple times throughout life it's so unfortunate
Listening to this I'm gonna want to go back to therapy 😪
Be strong. Bless up
You are a beautiful lady inside and out! Your pain and suffering will lift the hearts with inspiration of many many people. So, in that sense 'OUT OF THE MUD GROWS THE LOTUS"!!! Thank you sooooooooo much for being born. Keep it up - the loveliness you are puting out into the world. Divine Love!
its important to teach ethics and values to our children (boys) since they small
Sorry for what you been through and thank you for sharing your story with us and you are a strong brave lady God have been keeping you strong and he will continue to do so 😊
Thank you mom for protecting us from such atrocities. RIP miss you so much.
The truth always comes out so speak up!
Thanks for sharing. Ur story will definitely help others
You are BRAVE, beautiful (inside & out and back again) and amazing for telling your story. You help others heal with your story and sharing it with such confidence and matter of fact about the details.
Thanks for putting this out there. You will heal others with your video and your stories. You are a Way Shower in our world.
Don't ever forget how Brave you are and how precious you are to God. Our Father loves you and is so proud of you. I am too sister. You are amazing and precious for being so vunerable to us while educating many others along the way!!!
My parents abused their own children, made our Lives miserable, didn’t teach us how to survive, lacked knowledge about God, Health or anything else,; they didn’t have any plans nor expectations for their own children nor for themselves. Looking back, I come to the conclusions that they was mental, slow, naive, don’t have enough sense, too sweet when it comes to the relatives. They could have had head trauma/injuries and didn’t know it; they were orphans too and didn’t know it, they were lone wolves..
Thank you. So sorry .
You are a strong woman, I don't know you , but I think God has a plan for your life , keep on educate ing other's,to watch out for there kids , because mom had to know something was wrong, behavior changes if nothing else and talk to you until she knew what was going on ,cont. To do what you do it my just save some ones life my God continue to bless your beautiful soul❤
Amen praise god that he got u out and away from that monster of a human being. I'm so glad that u are doing better and happy now. U turned ur tragedy into a testimony girl ❤
God bless you, beautiful 💖
Thank you for sharing your story 🙏
You are really strong! Please mever give up girl! This video and how you shared your situation it's a porve of how strong you really are!
Sending prayers, love, healing your way❤
These men are savages. But women still treat them like gold. Smdh
So happy you made it through
Thank you for sharing. 😔
Updated: 9/26/22, I had an experience one day in February, 1997, upon arriving home from work, entering the shower, when I was crying out to the Lord about some abusers, manipulators, Narcissists, control freaks, attention seekers and mental-health destroying leeches, liars, thieves and harassers in the workplace. So I heard an none audible voice in my belly saying “go into the Ministry”, so I finished showering and got out of the showers, stepping out in my studio living room, and the Holy Spirit continued to minister to me, was inside of me within my intermost being, spreading out all throughout me, sending me his Love, “lead my people”. It was an heavenly experience, felt good having the Holy Spirit visit me. The atmosphere changed, it became lighter where there weren’t a care in the world, then the atmosphere changed back to normal. I didn’t expect this event, if the churches would have warned us of this, then I would have been more prepared and asked questions of the Holy Spirit. I got Jesus, do you have Jesus??
That is the power of the Holy Spirit
You are Amazing!! ❤❤❤ Much love and blessings from Boston. God is good!! Jesus is good!! Blessings🙏🙏🙏🙏. All day
I wonder if she ever stopped to think how many times her father called her mother crazy? And that her relationship with him was just to preserve his image and further isolate her mother.
This lady is amazing and so strong
Unfortunately this happens way too often, more than people want to acknowledge. It’s not just black or white thing ( which I’ve seen people claim), this happens it almost every family.
The penis is probably the most violent weapon on the planet
18:40 OMG! Yes!
I did it the same way and I’m so glad I did.❤ Thank you
This is why I never wanted to go folks homes & didn't want them in & out of my home.
I recognized the nightmares of these households even as a kid.
Farther more,
I knew if the women of these homes didn't protect their own family members, children, grandchildren, etc. A non family member was certainly doomed in these homes. Around any of these folks.😮😮
So, all I wanted was to be as far these environments as possible.
Tell the children the truth 😢
God bless you are a a lovely woman ❤
W0W I'm so sorry you went through all this grief and pain 💔 😔 this is horrible 💔 😢 😞 that person set you up that's soo sad 😔 💔😢😞😔😪
I love you lady , thank you
🤔Now,"Why ;Did She Keep Opening The Door for these Different boys/Men "??? WHY 🤔
GOD BLESS.
Send you hugs ❤
Young people don’t need to date, just be friends; wait until you see/meet/ get to know somebody that you will like to marry..
2:44 tbh I wish my mother did that when I was younger.. things where just like this aswell and it’s hard im only 15 now and I was taking care of my siblings in a young age. And In 2021 I got tooking into foster 😔
Its very sad. It seems black women are constantly SA by family and friends 😢
Makes wonder why Ilene Wornos is not here! They did that woman wrong. Wasn’t she abused by so many men??
God bless you ❤️
You are an amazing woman! I’m shocked to hear about all the sexual abuse that goes on with children. I’m so very sorry. I cannot imagine. Thank you for telling your story to help others.
So they really sat there & watched you get beat... 😞
Update: 6/12/21, over 35 years ago, upon two occasions, a neighborhood friend out of the Blue, I don’t know what prompted him to state this, “your relatives aren’t exactly who you think that they are, your grandmother could be an aunt or a cousin”; or instead your granddad could be the uncle or the cousin. I didn’t think that this concerned me at all because I believed what my parents told me that those were their parents and relatives, but they weren’t too happy with the relatives and often complained; me and my siblings complained too, these relatives weren’t treating us right. I found out 15 years ago that there were many unofficial adoptions from the beginning of time up until the 1940s for the United States and still continuing all over the world (I imagine in war torn countries where children were/are orphaned))when there were no paperwork, no attorney nor court, nothing legal. You just take the baby, infant, toddler, small child, and teen home with you and when the ‘census records takers’ comes around you just tell them that its your daughter/son if they will be too young to remember that they were separated from their biological parents; they are not never told about whatever happened to their parents, that they were/are not their children, and that they are not the parents. Not only did relatives take in the orphans but none relatives or friends of the parents and neighbors. Back then heads of households took in strangers when they didn’t have nobody to stay with; and the census records aren’t correct as to the ‘role’ of the infant, baby, toddler and small child to the head of households. In many cases if the infant, baby, toddler and small child is believed to be no kin, then they are mistreated badly, not talked to, nor cared about nor looked out for nor encouraged to do better or stay in school; this is the reasons that you may not be liked, respected, cared about, talked to, looked out for by who you thought was your parents, grandparents, greats, aunts/uncles, first cousins and other kin, because they believe that you are not related/kinfolks. This is why you can’t find ‘Midwives papers’ 1.)because who you were told and grew up believing is your parents and grandparents believe that you are not which isn’t always true because the men folks were stepping outside of their marriages and dropping babies 2.) because the babies, infants, toddlers and small children weren’t old enough to remember that they were separated from their parents for whatever reasons - one to a few out of one hundred reasons. There’s many reasons why babies, infants, toddlers, small children and teens are separated from their biological parents. Collect the Family history anyway, because you possibly could be 2nd to 10th cousins, you would have to get an Ancestry dna test or 23&me to find out for sure. Is. 53:4-6; Ro. 1:9.
Don’t just leave my ass!! When someone puts their hands on you, you need to get the f*** on IMMEDIATELY! I will never understand how people stay & put up with that…