Here I am thinking that I have seen the worse of it when Adam Savage doesn't adjust the blade guards when he makes cuts on Tested. Now I see this monstrosity.
I’m a professional carpenter and a huge fan. When I have a rough day at work and I screw something up, I come back and watch this video and it fills me with incalculable joy. Thanks, UpIsNotJump!
If you dodnt mind me curious question, did you find this YT channel/or just video because you knew of this channel or you were just lookin up carpentry videos?
Usually when I see behaviour like this I think “this person is an agent of chaos” but in this case I don’t think agent is enough. He’s more of an acolyte of chaos, religiously preforming as many chaotic acts as physically possible to achieve a greater purpose far beyond mere mortal understanding.
He needs to watch some basic woodworking videos before he attempts a real project. Not because his work looks like shit, but he's gonna seriously hurt himself.
I can already picture, a guest comes over and sees the shelves. “Wow, that’s a horrible shelf, who made that?” The room goes dark, his wife slowly scoots away. He pulls a power saw out of nowhere and starts screaming in tune with the saw’s whirring.
Finally, a channel honest with showing the absolutely madding process of trying to adapt to a family life. Cooking, painting, and now home projects, all ending with a man slowly going mad and crying in a pile of how own desperate creation, screaming madly during the process in between. Why, you can even see the dark circles under his eyes expand with every cut! One day we'll spite those smug online instruction bastards who seem to always know what they're doing... one day... ... Burning that thing is probably the best course of action.
Be careful, as during the holidays if little Timmy doesn't get a new heart for his heart surgery, they're gonna have to use the pine from the Christmas tree to make a- (MJRAHOLEs Child-sized coffin joke has been cut from the footage)
Rustic. Authentic. Hand-made. A book-case from a simpler time, but one that will last throughout the ages. As long as the ages don't last more than a week. Looking at this book-case makes one really appreciate the small things in life and enjoy simple living.
It’s *got* the jagged edges. It’s *got* the exposed nails. It’s *got* the splattered glue droplets and mangled backing. What more could you possibly ask for from a bookshelf?!
"Honey, I need somewhere to store some things, we're running out of shelf space, could you go to the sho..." "I'VE JUST HAD A GREAT IDEA FOR A VIDEO" "...no...no...no..." "LOOK AT THIS TUTORIAL I FOUND!" "...NO...NO...NO..." *SPAWNS SAW* *_"NOOOOOOOOOOO"_*
In all seriousness that video you were watching was an awful tutorial. He made the assumption that you already had every single one of those big profesionel and super expensive tools and didn't give any guidence as to what you had to use if you didn't. A good table saw can easily cost you 2.000 dollars. If you use the tools often enough to justify owning tools like that then odds are you are already a professional and don't need a tutorial. I am actually a professional carpenter and i don't even own every tool this guy was using. A good tutorial would be someone who limits himself to using the tools that would be reasonable that a novice on a hobby level would own. (hammer, handsaw and skrevdrivers, perhaps an electric drill, and so on.)
Exactly! I know this video was kind of a joke but man, I've never seen some of these tools and (though I'm not a carpenter) I've built my share of furniture. Such a strange tutorial
I'm by no means a professional carpenter but I've created a fair few intricate things, and the tutorial here is about as helpful as trying to teach someone how to make dovetail joints using actual dove tail feathers.
I guess there's the novice who has access to a good makerspace/comuntiy workshop or whatever name they decide to use. But then there's the other people there who would be able to help them.
Gonna play Rimworld again if they'll release an update that makes the colonists clean their own rooms without me having to manually command them to do so
As someone who quite literally built his own house (well sorta, it's a cabin shell I finished out, walls, doors, windows, electrical, plumbing, and other furniture and fun stuff) and owns and used every tool you had, and then some, this was the best video you've ever made. Thank you for your pain
I to know the pain y'all have went through! My grandfather owned a construction company that I used to work for... So many hot summer days doing framing, insulation, electrical and plumbing.
So much this. I’m doing a full resto-remodel of a 4 bedroom farmhouse on my own (plumbing, wiring, the works) and I’ve grown up with carpentry. Pretty sure I was pulling nails before I could walk. So watching this guy with wrists like a dowel rod attempt a bookshelf, it’s pure comedy. I won’t give him too much grief, i would look just as ridiculous trying to code a program or debug something. And as grandpa would say, ‘it doesn’t matter how ugly it is, as long as it works, that’s all that matters’. Of course, he would point at grandma as he said it and she would give him a wallop for it. 😂
At the beginning of this video: "I'm pretty sure he shouldn't be allowed to have power tools" At the end of this video: "He shouldn't be allowed to have power tools"
UpisNotJump’s wife: “Marriage is an absolute nightmare and this is why. He is always filming for his videos and I walk in on him doing comedic cuts. Last week I walked in on him spinning a doll head on his drill while chanting satanic runes surrounded by candles. I can’t tell if he is actually a comedic genius or just long gone in a cult.”
As someone whose boss thought "I know plumbing and electrical" meant "I can do top notch carpentry and love every opportunity I get to do so", I feel this in my soul.
i am swedish please don't let me make furniture anyways our school system starts with woodworking in 5th (turn 12) or 6th (turn 13) grade i can't remember, probably not but might actually be 4th (turn 11) grade, and we have it every year for half the school year, and the other half it's sewing instead, i got a sewing machine driver's license (literally translated from symaskin körkort, sewing license is more cachy but not as accurate of a translation) when i was still not allowed to access most websites on the internet, so generally we're pretty good but still, please do not let me make furniture
As someone who has done a fair amount of carpentry, I can easily say this is one of the hardest things I've ever watched. And I loved every moment of it.
I wish my brain worked with metric better, because using a measurement system that uses the same number system as the rest of standard mathematic practice is really, really nice. I know from the projects I've done in metric. I also wish we used a base for our number system other than decimal, but that's not metric's fault, and imperial is hardly an improvement on that front.
@@Hedvigu that crisis comes early sometimes, especially nowadays. With the identity crisis and social issues being more prevalent in these years, youth today are more self destructive towards themselves than ever. What zoomers or millenials are experiencing is not midlife crisis, but it is very similar. Midlife crisis is getting attached to how people used to view you through whatever means you implemented, and it crashing because of age, for youth it's obviously not because of age. Youth are more confused than ever, creating many issues on how you perceive yourself. People back then attained identities easier, even accepting the labels society puts on them a lot easier nowadays we don't want what your father wanted for you. We want to be our true selves, but that is impossible when fitting people predictions for you to co exist easy. It's so hard these days to be somebody your proud of, oh well.
@@lohus224 Oh yeah dying with laughter, I know watching a video like he did with little/no experience must be difficult so props to him for still giving it a good go!
Digging the nail polish. Though I must confess that initially I thought you'd bruised the nailbeds on some of your fingers during the shelf-making process.
@@annslow41 a man wearing a single nail painted is (most likely) not just making a fashion statement. Odds are, they’re participating in the Polished Man campaign, an organization which strives to raise awareness about children who are - or have been - sexually abused.
@@rasmus532 Being completely unaware of this, I would say that it exposes the problem of using an obtuse gesture to reference a serious and terrible issue.
"Lets make a really big pilot hole" "A pilot hole is either a small hole drilled into a material to guide a larger drill to the appropriate location and ease the job of the larger drill" - Wikipedia Ah yes a master craftsman
Honestly, as the son of a man who is basically a master carpenter, I agree with this title- And this entire video- Honestly, this video is my life, he's talked to me about his projects since I was 12, I still have absolutely no idea what he's talking about when he tells me about his projects- I just listen and occasionally agree with what he says, while appearing to think of ideas, never fails- I got as far as understanding what different types of saws and machines he owns and the subtle differences between wood types- That's is- So imagine how awkward it is when he's talking to me and asking my opinion about a project that I don't remember him ever talking to me about, or can understand half the tools or parts he's talking about or mentions because I wasn't born knowing what the difference is between a scroll saw, a band saw and a planer- Jesus please come back here and help me, I need someone who can teach me basic carpentry, and you're the only person I know-
@@RevaeRavus I know all this, this is just an example of some of the things I've dealt with- I've used his scroll saw once before because he was trying to teach me how to use it, it's nowhere near as easy as he made it look.
Get's a counter sink set, shows us the set, and then doesn't counter sink any of the pilot holes. Get's a router, shows us the router, and then doesn't route any of the edges. When you said, "What am I going to do with all this stuff after the video," my thought was: What did you do with them during the video? Just being cheeky :) Love your VR videos they totally got me to buy a Valve Index this Christmas. Have a great new year!
I think the idea is that is was following what the instruction video told him with novice level experience so I think the end result is just as much that way too smiley dude on the video's fault lol
1:17 it's surprising how half-safe he's being, it's like he's doing it on purpose. he's using a pusher, but he's holding it a bit too parallel in my opinion and he's also standing to the side, but he's still partially in the way in case of a backfire.
"Today on carpentry with UpIsNotJump we're not going to follow up on my Existence is a Nightmare or Mario Maker is a Nightmare series because you should suffer as much broken promises as I did from my Dad"
Me: *Nerviously fast forwards to the end to make sure he survives to the end with all his body parts intact* Me: Okay, good, now I can watch him be an absolute goof. Also me: *still winces when he's flinging around knives and saws*
As someone doing A level Product Design who's behind others in terms of practical skill, this video helped me a lot. I now feel a lot better about my practical skills.
I love this, when I had to make a campervan conversion, I swear every tutorial was like this. Claims to help new starters but starts introducing tools and techniques only experienced people would know. Often some of the stuff is so situational I'd bring it up to actual experienced folk and they'd be like "Wtf is that? I just use this other (RANDOM SUPERFLUOUS TOOL OF IMPORTANCE!)" then Im like "WTF!" Long story short, when doing anything 'Handy' buy everything and then have so many tools you can just assume you have everything you need...then make 12 more trips to buy other shit you never knew you needed, then say fuck then live in a van...FUCK!
@@OctyabrAprelya oh fuck, so true! Even TH-cam food recipes assume you're a beginner, diy guys act like only 10 year woodworking veterans watch their videos.
@@avancalledrupert5130 watched some of your videos (I like your video about pellets stripping tutorial* ). You obviously have knowledge and experience in your field. However its not fair to say "you're a man you should have it (knowledge about carpentry)". Some people tries to get into carpentry with zero basic knowledge as a new hobby, you cant say that they're not a man just because they dont know carpentry. Some people are soldiers, Matt was a teacher, some businessman and more, cant say they're not a man just because they dont have basic knowledge in a certain field. Not being negative or whiny but be careful with your words on the internet man because saying the wrong thing can fuck you up. It'll be a shame if that happens to you since you make videos yourself and I kinda like em. Cheers
This is so painfully true. Never did woodworking before, but i'm making an overcomplicated table. Since i started, i bought 3 brand new machines, did 4 trips to the hardware store, and after 3 months, i'm not even done. I always encounter a new problem wich requires a new piece of equipment to fix. FML.
Thank you so much for this video! It's nice seeing someone being just as incompetent as I am when I comes to carpentry. I'm pretty sure I was the only kid in my woodshop class that was too scared to sit on their own chair after they made it.
As a woodworkers son and being one myself - this puts me into perspective about how average human being would actually struggle with something I find as normal as sitting down. Also its fun to watch.
![BOWKYLION - วิงวอน (ex-change) [Official MV]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/cLdnZWDaO-w/mqdefault.jpg)
My wife is a very patient woman
Half Life: Alyx next!! (I promise)
UpIsNotJump so is your mom lmao
Obviously
Oh ok
very very very very
Hi UpIsNotJump, how are you today, I hope you're well
Only you can make something brand new that looks like it was found after a fire.
Here I am thinking that I have seen the worse of it when Adam Savage doesn't adjust the blade guards when he makes cuts on Tested. Now I see this monstrosity.
Australian here, I've seen footage from houses that survived the bushfires that looked better than this.
Dan, I fully agree
Couldn't agree more Dan
@@littlemikey46 to be fair, his bookcase was so bad it caught fire
The fact that you didn't hurt yourself while making this is astonishing
Steele - oh, I thought that’s why all of his fingernails were black. The true sign of a “good” carpenter.
He smash one of his fingers with a hammer
Jay D he did this because he hurt himself
Yes I wouldn't let him close to my tools that's for sure haha
For gods sake he used a chop saw BACKWARDS
I’m a professional carpenter and a huge fan. When I have a rough day at work and I screw something up, I come back and watch this video and it fills me with incalculable joy. Thanks, UpIsNotJump!
If you dodnt mind me curious question, did you find this YT channel/or just video because you knew of this channel or you were just lookin up carpentry videos?
I love that he messes up things so badly that paid professionals come to see on how not to perform their career of choice.
@@Ykskolme I'm a carpenter who happens to own a Oculus Quest, so I came for the VR content, but I stayed for the carpentry.
Josh Brown I’m the opposite, I love woodworking, and do it nown again, (I’m worse than him)
But he got me to *get* an oculus instead.
Woooww line you’re akchually guna sey that
"Who authorised that jump cut" is this channels motto
Wow, that timing. Scrolling through the comments and as I see yours, all I hear is "who authorized that jump cut?!"
This is so obvious that I’m mad at myself for not thinking about it
Lmao
"Man goes crazy during Coronavirus isolation and makes a bookcase."
Alternative title
BookCase*
...to proudly display his lifetime supply of toilet paper...
this is what happened to his tongue
Help I accidentally build a shelf
Man, it's been long since that meme
Usually when I see behaviour like this I think “this person is an agent of chaos” but in this case I don’t think agent is enough. He’s more of an acolyte of chaos, religiously preforming as many chaotic acts as physically possible to achieve a greater purpose far beyond mere mortal understanding.
LunaDeaminac He is like a bishop, or a cardinal, even.
Blood for the blood god
@@SuzanneHomemaker He's less Khorne and more Tzeentch.
BP Petracek Skulls for the skull throne
@@magosmarechferracioli1128 did you forgot the gorn and red dead redemption 2: killing all animals videos?
I love woodworking and this hurt my soul.
Understandable
Yea i bet you do
I'm indifferent to woodworking and yet I still felt pain.....
He needs to watch some basic woodworking videos before he attempts a real project. Not because his work looks like shit, but he's gonna seriously hurt himself.
@@toastiesburned9929 I think he needs a lot more than woodworking videos to learn to be safe.
Man quarantine really hit this man hard
I dont even think he reliesed that there is a quarantine
I didn't even know coronachan could affect the brain.
Might want to add a comma
I can already picture, a guest comes over and sees the shelves.
“Wow, that’s a horrible shelf, who made that?”
The room goes dark, his wife slowly scoots away.
He pulls a power saw out of nowhere and starts screaming in tune with the saw’s whirring.
xD
I think he burnt it.
The funny thing about this is that in some parts he is genuinely trying
Please I beg you keep us updated on his experience
"he a genuinely trying" i read that in an italian voice
As someone who's done carpentry as a profession, I quite enjoy watching this poor man struggle and do everything wrong. God bless.
Finally, a channel honest with showing the absolutely madding process of trying to adapt to a family life. Cooking, painting, and now home projects, all ending with a man slowly going mad and crying in a pile of how own desperate creation, screaming madly during the process in between. Why, you can even see the dark circles under his eyes expand with every cut! One day we'll spite those smug online instruction bastards who seem to always know what they're doing... one day...
... Burning that thing is probably the best course of action.
So. Al Bundy basicaly.
Ha, the glue in plywood makes it unsafe to burn!
And then he flees from his problems into VR
How much do you want to bet that in a few months a video will be raising a kid is a nightmare
Burning what? The case or the man?
It looks like a coffin made by someone prone to seizures
Be careful, as during the holidays if little Timmy doesn't get a new heart for his heart surgery, they're gonna have to use the pine from the Christmas tree to make a-
(MJRAHOLEs Child-sized coffin joke has been cut from the footage)
that's one way to put it
Who let this man around power tools and sharp objects??? I love watching all your videos
Somehow a piece of ply and two saw horses are more dangerous than a router or a table saw.
the same people that let this man work with chemicals. himself.
Rustic. Authentic. Hand-made. A book-case from a simpler time, but one that will last throughout the ages. As long as the ages don't last more than a week. Looking at this book-case makes one really appreciate the small things in life and enjoy simple living.
An elegant bookcase for a more civilized age.
Im pretty sure merely looking at it will cause it to dismantle
That "one that will last throughout the ages. As long as the ages don't last more than a week" part maked me let out a hearty chuckle
It's "artesian" lol
is this a sims item description
- "Honey, we need a bookcase, let's go to ikea"
- "BookCase video"
- "DON'T YOU DARE"
- **Starts screaming in tune with the saw’s whirring**
I'm pretty sure it was just him and the saw didn't make any noises, it's his signal call for the other serial killers.
This has 420 likes now. nice.
I want a divorce.
Imagine being his neighbour and hearing the noises he makes in his garden
or the screams from inside his home!
the neighbour: *grab holy water, bible and wooden cross *
You thinks he still has neighbor's? Cute. They left years ago.
Dam you sun
I'm used to it.
as someone who has been apprenticing as a carpenter for the last 6 months I have never related to a video so much.
I've done wood work in secondary school this hurts just get a tennon saw
I'm on my fourth year. Keep at it, brotha 💪🏻
@@seantansey3478 since when did they start naming saws?
They didn't but the saw he was using was not made for that
It’s *got* the jagged edges. It’s *got* the exposed nails. It’s *got* the splattered glue droplets and mangled backing. What more could you possibly ask for from a bookshelf?!
It's hip, it's now, it's an affront to God's plan, it's Matt trying to carpentry
Well there’s probably a little blood somewhere in there
Youre just the kid the teacher all warned us about in high school while showing the equipment.
Dractmead neb he was warning us about himself
@@rx2enemy190 No he was the Science teacher.
He's also the guy that the shop teacher warned us about
"Honey, I need somewhere to store some things, we're running out of shelf space, could you go to the sho..."
"I'VE JUST HAD A GREAT IDEA FOR A VIDEO"
"...no...no...no..."
"LOOK AT THIS TUTORIAL I FOUND!"
"...NO...NO...NO..."
*SPAWNS SAW*
*_"NOOOOOOOOOOO"_*
Honey does video idea recommendations as well? Wow, it really is a useful app. Wait, what?
>Honey
h o n e y...
*HONEY*
Carpen-what? *instantly hit in the face with sawdust*
In all seriousness that video you were watching was an awful tutorial.
He made the assumption that you already had every single one of those big profesionel and super expensive tools and didn't give any guidence as to what you had to use if you didn't. A good table saw can easily cost you 2.000 dollars. If you use the tools often enough to justify owning tools like that then odds are you are already a professional and don't need a tutorial.
I am actually a professional carpenter and i don't even own every tool this guy was using.
A good tutorial would be someone who limits himself to using the tools that would be reasonable that a novice on a hobby level would own. (hammer, handsaw and skrevdrivers, perhaps an electric drill, and so on.)
Exactly! I know this video was kind of a joke but man, I've never seen some of these tools and (though I'm not a carpenter) I've built my share of furniture. Such a strange tutorial
I'm by no means a professional carpenter but I've created a fair few intricate things, and the tutorial here is about as helpful as trying to teach someone how to make dovetail joints using actual dove tail feathers.
The fuck is a skrevdriver
I guess there's the novice who has access to a good makerspace/comuntiy workshop or whatever name they decide to use. But then there's the other people there who would be able to help them.
Would there be any specific reason why he’d want to use the more obscure tools, instead of more common ones?
7:15 Here are the notes in order based on the pitch of his scream:
E, F#, G, and G#.
Edit: He screams in G# twice.
Thats just actually impressive.
Full chromatic baby
@@muhammadjuhlan missing the F. He screamed in E Minor with a diminished fifth
*"Local school teacher is arrested for possible murder while 'Making book case' says authorities"*
Surely they would say Ex-teacher
Duncan Mill
Nah.
They'd make sure to add "Online TH-camr"
"Reports say that the victim used a 'trusty framing square' and got decapitated.
A work of art. A true work of art.
Were you the tutorial guy??
Wow, hi. Can I ask for your autograph?
Wow
Tutorial guy confirmed
@@cantigo6548 nope, Matt from DIY Perks do like to make it look easier than it is, but his tutorials are at least understandable :D
He's gone off the rails, he no longer makes non - variety content, meaning he now makes non - variety content of variety content! Incredible!
He was on rails to begin with?
More like gone of the nails, am I right? ... Right guys? ... Anyone?
@@ChrisMorray oh, because of the carpentry thing! I get it!
The self-isolations’s getting to him.
What's a Rail?
"I want a divorce."
Is there an award for Best Supporting Role in a TH-cam channel? Because I've found someone to nominate for it.
Not a supporting role for long if she goes through with it
When your colonist in rimworld is only level 3 crafting but you need someone to build the chairs and tables
I forgot about rimworld. I need to play it again
Construction skill is needed for that lol
@@kaanmckenna7030 No wonder my colony keeps dying
I wondered what that would look like
Gonna play Rimworld again if they'll release an update that makes the colonists clean their own rooms without me having to manually command them to do so
As someone who quite literally built his own house (well sorta, it's a cabin shell I finished out, walls, doors, windows, electrical, plumbing, and other furniture and fun stuff) and owns and used every tool you had, and then some, this was the best video you've ever made.
Thank you for your pain
"Thank you for your pain" - ahhahahahahahahahahha!!
No big deal.....
I to know the pain y'all have went through! My grandfather owned a construction company that I used to work for... So many hot summer days doing framing, insulation, electrical and plumbing.
@@backwoodsjunkie08 there were several times where I thought "I should be recording this and make a TH-cam series"
Several times
So much this.
I’m doing a full resto-remodel of a 4 bedroom farmhouse on my own (plumbing, wiring, the works) and I’ve grown up with carpentry. Pretty sure I was pulling nails before I could walk.
So watching this guy with wrists like a dowel rod attempt a bookshelf, it’s pure comedy. I won’t give him too much grief, i would look just as ridiculous trying to code a program or debug something.
And as grandpa would say, ‘it doesn’t matter how ugly it is, as long as it works, that’s all that matters’. Of course, he would point at grandma as he said it and she would give him a wallop for it. 😂
At the beginning of this video: "I'm pretty sure he shouldn't be allowed to have power tools"
At the end of this video: "He shouldn't be allowed to have power tools"
I'm not sure he should be allowed tools nevermind powered ones
@@jamesmcdougal6780 Too true
same man.
He shouldn't, just shouldn't
There are two miracles here,
One: He's still alive
Two: It stands on its own
Nevermind I guess
Coming soon to his wife’s channel: “marriage is an absolute nightmare”
"how I didn't marry nakey jakey"
Marriage is an absolute nightmare: This is why" And the video linked is just a mashup of all of his "this is why" videos, lol.
UpisNotJump’s wife: “Marriage is an absolute nightmare and this is why. He is always filming for his videos and I walk in on him doing comedic cuts. Last week I walked in on him spinning a doll head on his drill while chanting satanic runes surrounded by candles. I can’t tell if he is actually a comedic genius or just long gone in a cult.”
And the estimated time for a divorce is 3 weeks
Good stuff!!👏🏼😂
Ah yes, "How to Make a BookCase for People Who Already Know How to Make a BookCase." My favorite tutorial.
This man was a teacher.
*was*
What did he teach
@@Unclear4 Chemistry.
@@marcusdixson1090 imagine when he has the brilliant idea to do a chemistry video inside the house
@@marcusdixson1090 I would have loved to have him as a chem teacher
As someone whose boss thought "I know plumbing and electrical" meant "I can do top notch carpentry and love every opportunity I get to do so", I feel this in my soul.
UR USING A TABLESAW INSIDE
That mess will be legendary
no no don't worry, he used a BUCKET. That'll do it.
@@riten0tajs623 (It didn't do)
@@annoyinglyfast5972 (I see that you explained the joke)
Next it’ll be something like “Developing a game is a nightmare”
Building a time machine is a nightmare
The chalice
Omg it is
90% of time is spent on google trying to fix errors
I will play that game.
"Organising an entirely new government and running a country is a nightmare"
The man rightfully starts the episode by praying to Jesus, the God of carpentry.
😂 😂
Yet there was no nail gun
This comment is underrated
Not to alarm anyone, but you've got 666 likes.
Edit: had
As a fellow tradesman Jesus approves of this
"What the fuck?! Who authorized that jump cut?!" - George Lucas whenever he sees a scene transition that isn't a screen wipe
This just in: Local brit decapitates self.
@@rx2enemy190 And explodes. But the bookshelf next to him remains unscathed.
@@Corbomite_Meatballs Except for whatever scars, er, birthmarks it gained during it's summoning ritual.
*shelf
..... with a handsaw.... somehow..
"British Man Rebels Against Swedish Monopoly on Constructible Furniture, Three Dead."
I've seen the video. All things considered, we got off LIGHT.
@@mid-nite_drive-thru You mean the swedes got off light.
Three dead you say?
Thats unfortunate... *Cleans My hammer i brought in Ikea*
Nobody tell him that you can just rent tools instead of buying them outright.
Shhhhhhhhhhhh
It's fine, he has more money
They will be a suprise that he will use later
It usually makes more sense to buy the hand tools outright because you never know if you’ll need them. That is if you have the space for it
*THE RENT IS TOO DAMN HIGH*
This is why we let Swedes make our furniture.
And chainsaws.
i am swedish please don't let me make furniture
anyways our school system starts with woodworking in 5th (turn 12) or 6th (turn 13) grade i can't remember, probably not but might actually be 4th (turn 11) grade, and we have it every year for half the school year, and the other half it's sewing instead, i got a sewing machine driver's license (literally translated from symaskin körkort, sewing license is more cachy but not as accurate of a translation) when i was still not allowed to access most websites on the internet, so generally we're pretty good but still, please do not let me make furniture
@@sodiboo who asked
@@sodiboo shut up and make me a desk
@@loft777 hey don’t be racist against the swedes
As someone who has done a fair amount of carpentry, I can easily say this is one of the hardest things I've ever watched. And I loved every moment of it.
“Only years of experience will get you those cuts.”
*we all know he means the ones on his fingers.*
"Paint and putty are a wood butcher's buddy." - My dad
A real butcher's too
had to read that twice... 'wood butcher....'
Americans: "Imperial is so much better than metric"
Also Americans: "So we're gonna cut this board to 8/35ths of a inch thick"
accurate
I was actually just welding and asked the guy “should the weld be say...4 mm thick”
He said “about an 1/8 of and inch”
“Our shelves are 12 inches wide, and 6 ft long”
That’s.... that’s 1ft and 6ft. Why did he change units.
I hate the imperial system
I wish my brain worked with metric better, because using a measurement system that uses the same number system as the rest of standard mathematic practice is really, really nice. I know from the projects I've done in metric. I also wish we used a base for our number system other than decimal, but that's not metric's fault, and imperial is hardly an improvement on that front.
Not once has someone's midlife crisis bought me joy as much as this did.
Midlife?
Farmer Hayman this man is probably going to be dead by 40, but I admire your optimism
@@user-mn2mw1og8u this is why he's having his midlife crisis now
@@Hedvigu that crisis comes early sometimes, especially nowadays. With the identity crisis and social issues being more prevalent in these years, youth today are more self destructive towards themselves than ever. What zoomers or millenials are experiencing is not midlife crisis, but it is very similar. Midlife crisis is getting attached to how people used to view you through whatever means you implemented, and it crashing because of age, for youth it's obviously not because of age. Youth are more confused than ever, creating many issues on how you perceive yourself. People back then attained identities easier, even accepting the labels society puts on them a lot easier nowadays we don't want what your father wanted for you. We want to be our true selves, but that is impossible when fitting people predictions for you to co exist easy. It's so hard these days to be somebody your proud of, oh well.
This channel is getting more and more random. I enjoy it immensely
5:01 "Remember, if you wanna make a bookshelf that shines...You have to be prepared with some noteworthy rhymes"
I see what you did there~
I was thinking "Remember, If you wanna make a bookshelf that shines. Always make some noteworthy rhymes!"
I’m imagining that after it was “finished” that Sid sat looking at the “bookshelf” for a LONG time considering IF he should risk jumping on it or not.
This is the only channel that will ever get me excited about a video on carpentry.
Carpentry is actually hella fun
@@METALGEARMATRIX I have no reason to distrust you! I just never dabbled in it myself.
as someone who has done carpentry... every shot of him with a power tool or saw gives me anxiety
Yep. Boy Scout here. I was half expecting him to whack a finger off
Using a table saw inside the house is what did it for me. Jesus.
@@TheArgusApocraphex1 he literally tried to use a bucket for the saw dust. I'm just glad he still has all of his fingers.
@@boblon5693 you know that UpIsNotJump is fully aware the bucket wouldn't work right? and that it's for people's amusement?
Bet he is much more talented and experienced as he pretends to be (I mean he even has a GRR Ripper ;))
5:56 i didnt know that electric screw drivers had a "bag pipes" setting.
It's built into all 'made in Scotland' ones
Bruh, he's wearing the same outfit as the guy in the tutorial.
1: how did I not notice that
2: how didn't half the comment section
"...is this the hoodie I set on fire?" is only a normal question on this channel
As a carpenter who makes kitchens for a living I'm dying watching this XD
Ayyyy... 117
Dying inside or dying laughing?
At least he followed all saftey rules!
@@lohus224 Oh yeah dying with laughter, I know watching a video like he did with little/no experience must be difficult so props to him for still giving it a good go!
2:02 It is this kind of moments that make me afraid when you haven't uploaded in a while.
@Dractmead neb *knives
*nives
Honestly the "Our l*?gohG? Backing" moment has to be one of the funniest things Ive seen in TH-cam
WHAT WAS HE SAYING?
Lauan wood
(Well, okay, he was saying "LgououN." But he meant lauan)
@@bcdm999 I see thanks mate
Digging the nail polish. Though I must confess that initially I thought you'd bruised the nailbeds on some of your fingers during the shelf-making process.
Why not both? It would be a good way to cover up bruises.
But why only one finger per hand?
I didn't understand what's going on here. Came to the comments for answers. Found none
@@annslow41 a man wearing a single nail painted is (most likely) not just making a fashion statement. Odds are, they’re participating in the Polished Man campaign, an organization which strives to raise awareness about children who are - or have been - sexually abused.
@@rasmus532 Being completely unaware of this, I would say that it exposes the problem of using an obtuse gesture to reference a serious and terrible issue.
"Lets make a really big pilot hole"
"A pilot hole is either a small hole drilled into a material to guide a larger drill to the appropriate location and ease the job of the larger drill" - Wikipedia
Ah yes a master craftsman
It seems stupid until he pulls out the comically large drill.
I’ve never had so much anxiety with so little workable knowledge in a field.
Edit, our boy has casually painted nails. Love it!
He does in most videos
I can only image an actual carpenter watching this have having a seizure, heart attack, and brain aneurism all at once, somehow
Everyone: AHHH CORONA AAAA
UpIsNotJump: Makes shelf
Maybe building shelf’s will save are Senior citizens
Game grumps and Funhause: we got stuff from IKEA to build
Upisnotjump: I AM THE IKEA!!!!
As a carpenter, this makes me cry.
Crying with laughter.
how many times did you say No don't do that
@@Sagitta62 I had flashbacks to when I got started as an apprentice. Tbh, it quickly ended up just being "bless his heart."
David Peterson same
@@Sagitta62 oh god so many
As a cabinet maker, same here
you giggling at his giggle at 2:32 is everything I never knew I needed.
6:00
*My mum told me to “turn off that bagpipe music”*
My cat when hearing that jump on the table and look at the screen
Honestly, as the son of a man who is basically a master carpenter, I agree with this title-
And this entire video-
Honestly, this video is my life, he's talked to me about his projects since I was 12, I still have absolutely no idea what he's talking about when he tells me about his projects-
I just listen and occasionally agree with what he says, while appearing to think of ideas, never fails-
I got as far as understanding what different types of saws and machines he owns and the subtle differences between wood types-
That's is-
So imagine how awkward it is when he's talking to me and asking my opinion about a project that I don't remember him ever talking to me about, or can understand half the tools or parts he's talking about or mentions because I wasn't born knowing what the difference is between a scroll saw, a band saw and a planer-
Jesus please come back here and help me, I need someone who can teach me basic carpentry, and you're the only person I know-
Scroll saw is like a tiny band saw I think? A planer is a cheese slicer, but for wood.
@@RevaeRavus I know all this, this is just an example of some of the things I've dealt with-
I've used his scroll saw once before because he was trying to teach me how to use it, it's nowhere near as easy as he made it look.
Tbh I didn't even read the entire thing and I'm already impressed
When you said Master carpenter I inmediatly thought of videogames levels, there's also a joke here but I can't get there
I like my dad's approach to doing anything with wood and carpentry "estimate, and it usually works out"
And next up !
“PARENTING IS A NIGHTMARE”
In the end they set the baby on fire
@@kamally "planning a funeral is a nightmare"
[ ]
“WHY DOES IT KEEP CRYING ?!”
@@guts8909 your not shaking it hard enough
Afonso Sampaio Having a drinking problem due to grief is a nightmare
The beauty of him spending presumably hours making that flatline manaquinn setup for the sake of a one second joke
I few more of these and we'll get "Building a Car Bomb Is An Absolute Nightmare - This Is Why"
"Building a two floor house from scratch is an absolute nightmare"
But he's not Irish tho
"As we see the modern day man Tame this ferocious beast called the Drill as it screams for the other drills for help" 5:49
all I heard starting at like 5:57 was the opening to Welcome to the Black Parade lol
Sounded kinda like a metallic deer being shot multiple times.😆
Soon: Self Quarantining at home with only a VR headset is a Nightmare
Dude ... no.
VR Porn.
Ah. Wait. He has a wife. ... does he have two headsets?
@@PuresG1ft r/cursedcomments
Get's a counter sink set, shows us the set, and then doesn't counter sink any of the pilot holes.
Get's a router, shows us the router, and then doesn't route any of the edges.
When you said, "What am I going to do with all this stuff after the video," my thought was: What did you do with them during the video?
Just being cheeky :) Love your VR videos they totally got me to buy a Valve Index this Christmas. Have a great new year!
No matter how composed we look on the outside, i think a lot of DIYers have this energy on the inside
I 100% agree!
This man can tell us how the universe was created, yet can't nail wood together at 90 degree angles...
And worse yet, couldn't figure out how to use a corner clamp. It goes in the corner!! This isn't rocket science mate
@@tedstudt8550 I think, in this case, that is exactly the problem ;P
I think the idea is that is was following what the instruction video told him with novice level experience so I think the end result is just as much that way too smiley dude on the video's fault lol
9:46
The fact that you were earnest in making this bookcase makes it all the more genuinely hilarious.
1:17 it's surprising how half-safe he's being, it's like he's doing it on purpose. he's using a pusher, but he's holding it a bit too parallel in my opinion and he's also standing to the side, but he's still partially in the way in case of a backfire.
I watched this with my dad
Four minutes later he came in with a drill and a watermelon instead of a mannequins head laughing his head off.
I love him.
Quarantine day 4: watching people make shelving for 12 minutes
"Today on carpentry with UpIsNotJump we're not going to follow up on my Existence is a Nightmare or Mario Maker is a Nightmare series because you should suffer as much broken promises as I did from my Dad"
"Fits like a glove" - God I'm crying on this.
Me: *Nerviously fast forwards to the end to make sure he survives to the end with all his body parts intact*
Me: Okay, good, now I can watch him be an absolute goof.
Also me: *still winces when he's flinging around knives and saws*
“...it’s just that none of these lines are straight. _i wonder why these lines aren’t straight.”_
*flashback to AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA*
I feel like Matt would be perfectly suited for 'Dungeon Mastering is a absolute nightmare' because he'd be a great DM, a chaotic one, but great.
New vid idea? 😏
@@jarothewerewolf5277 I damn hope so
@@ParadoxicWasHere same here
As someone doing A level Product Design who's behind others in terms of practical skill, this video helped me a lot.
I now feel a lot better about my practical skills.
I love this, when I had to make a campervan conversion, I swear every tutorial was like this. Claims to help new starters but starts introducing tools and techniques only experienced people would know. Often some of the stuff is so situational I'd bring it up to actual experienced folk and they'd be like "Wtf is that? I just use this other (RANDOM SUPERFLUOUS TOOL OF IMPORTANCE!)" then Im like "WTF!"
Long story short, when doing anything 'Handy' buy everything and then have so many tools you can just assume you have everything you need...then make 12 more trips to buy other shit you never knew you needed, then say fuck then live in a van...FUCK!
Sounds like a trip
@@OctyabrAprelya oh fuck, so true!
Even TH-cam food recipes assume you're a beginner, diy guys act like only 10 year woodworking veterans watch their videos.
I make videos myself. I do them with a assumed lvl of knowledge.
Those that dont have it well your a man you should have it 🙄
@@avancalledrupert5130 watched some of your videos (I like your video about pellets stripping tutorial* ). You obviously have knowledge and experience in your field. However its not fair to say "you're a man you should have it (knowledge about carpentry)". Some people tries to get into carpentry with zero basic knowledge as a new hobby, you cant say that they're not a man just because they dont know carpentry. Some people are soldiers, Matt was a teacher, some businessman and more, cant say they're not a man just because they dont have basic knowledge in a certain field.
Not being negative or whiny but be careful with your words on the internet man because saying the wrong thing can fuck you up. It'll be a shame if that happens to you since you make videos yourself and I kinda like em. Cheers
This is so painfully true. Never did woodworking before, but i'm making an overcomplicated table. Since i started, i bought 3 brand new machines, did 4 trips to the hardware store, and after 3 months, i'm not even done. I always encounter a new problem wich requires a new piece of equipment to fix. FML.
how has the same humour that exists in my head made it out of my brain, morphed into a human and now has a youtube channel
That mannequin’s been through a lot
I feel like just watching this is a safety hazard...
“Mom, can we get a bookcase?”
“We have a bookcase at home.”
Bookcase at home:
This bad stale meme needs to be sent to the shadow realm to never return
"I hate this fucking family."
So where's the need to get a new one when you already have this astonishing masterpiece
5:01
“remember If you wanna make a bookshelf that shines
then remember your lines”
"And don't forget the rhymes."
Thank you. I’m thick so was sitting there not getting it
This bookcase is a physical representation of how the British Empire was formed.
Badly
Mainly how it wasn’t.
Thank you so much for this video! It's nice seeing someone being just as incompetent as I am when I comes to carpentry. I'm pretty sure I was the only kid in my woodshop class that was too scared to sit on their own chair after they made it.
the director from bolt went insane after the show got cancelled
I've never seen a TH-cam video that so accurately represents my attempts to be creative and/or successful.
"only years of experience will get you those cuts"
Yes years of experience as youtuber.
oh you dumb fuck its sarcasm
As a woodworkers son and being one myself - this puts me into perspective about how average human being would actually struggle with something I find as normal as sitting down. Also its fun to watch.