5:55 "Most Autistic people don't actually suffer from our Autism, we suffer from the way the world sees and treats our Autism." "To the world, my brain is broken. And when the world treats someone like they're broken that person will slowly come to accept that brokenness as fact."
Diagnosed at 19, figured it out on my own and asked for it. If I had not, I doubt anyone would have noticed. I cannot pretend to be normal any longer at the cost of my energy and mental health. We must all strive to be ourselves.
I found out i was Aspie at age 44, currently age 49 I've never bothered going and getting an official diagnosis. Why? Because although normal people annoy, infuriate and irritate me beyond measure I know what my self worth is. I'm smarter than 99.99% of people on this planet, I see and understand things very few people ever will. I have a lovely son and a wierd but lovely wife.
Diagnosed at 19, figured it out on my own and asked for it. If I had not, I doubt anyone would have noticed. I cannot pretend to be normal any longer at the cost of my energy and mental health. We must all strive to be ourselves.
@Frederic Bastiat Same. I'm only being diagnosed now at 24, it's been a lifetime of struggling to fit in and pouring my energy into masking. This diagnose has, in many ways, released me.
Diagnosed at age 37. It was life-changing. When you find out WHY you are "the way that you are," you want to shout it from the rooftops so nobody else has to spend a portion of their life questioning their identity. Feeling like an alien on Earth.
I need to be diagnosed. My daughter got her diagnosis at age 6, which is lucky for her, and even though she is literally a mini-me (like she IS me) nobody got ME checked out. Nobody tested me. And I need to be tested, but am not sure how to go about it
Mama_in_pyjammas maybe speak about it with the people who diagnosed her? Weird that they didn’t ask you about it, often times they also assess the family, from what i’ve heard. If not maybe just go to your gp and say exactly what you said here, how your girl is a mini you and recognize everything that she has been diagnosed with. Good luck.
@@s.devries2644 I hope that when one family member tests positive for autism, the psychologists you are referring to ask for consent before testing the other members in the family. Testing multiple people in the family is logical though.
Same here. 36 and found out on the 2nd Feb. So many light switches went on at once. 180° turnaround from how I used to view my life. I studied psychology (dropped out just before graduating) and looked for answers in many other ways, but never once thought I could be on the Autism spectrum! Have any of you talked to your family and friends about it? When I try to explain Aspergers and convey to my family what a major life discovery this is for me, I'm met with blank looks and a change of subject...
I was pretty sure I was autistic like 20 years ago. I brought it up and was laugh at by mental health professionals, you can imagine by other people. I wasn't "autistic enough", I was "too smart", "too functional", whatever that means. I increasingly felt I was going crazy. After a life of depression, among other things, and many misdiagnosis (like bipolar and similar), now that I'm almost 40 I tried again, with all new studies about female ASD on hand, and got diagnosed: ASD, who would have known... me!? Underdiagnosis and misdiagnosis are way higher for women. I'm happy things change, and hope, like Tashi, for the day people with autism really don't know the road was bumpy to begin with.
Diagnosed at 49- even tho I had a son diagnosed at age 2 & 1/2…. But It wasn’t for another 12 years before doctors told me I also had autism … I PRAISE THE LORD for our uniqueness:) and we have never seen it negatively as the world does- WE DONT NEED FIXING… it’s the system that’s broken!!!
If you experience your life as an ILLNESS, You remain in the hospital. If you experience your life as an IDENTITY, You become liberated and That Identity becomes the source of your power.
My grandson has Autism and he’s extremely sensitive to what others say. He’s 11 years of age and l’m concerned at the way the world see this beautiful wee boy . Some people judge and don’t understand. This is what hurts the most.
I'd say the worst are the ones who understand, fear, and react offensively, thinking it's the best defence. Not that they'd admit to understanding. They just see that this is a person who has abilities that they lack, but also have weaknesses they can exploit.
Your wee boy is in for it, I fear Jan. I am autistic male 75, and only now have allowed myself to be wonderfully Autistic, finally no masks, no masks to wear in the working/academic worlds to get along make money. Why wonderful? Take the pandemic for instance, everyone here in Calif is complaining about lockdowns, social isolation, no problem here, except for wearing a mask life is same for me, actually glad others don't get too close physically, creeps me out! Stressing out, isolated from others, outcasted for my differences, all daily obstacles to overcome dealing with others, always. Now retired, few bucks in the bank, nice place in country to enjoy solitude near my wild critters. Understand Jan, things do not change, Autistic for life we be! Few things helped me early on, firstly my parents allowed me free guilt free alone time, lots of books, no pressures, then my life long obsessions: craftmanship (keep hands busy), martial arts including medicine anatomy Biology and especially important for all youth daily physical strength training, knowing self-defense well, self assurance. People view Autistics as weak, indeed socially we are and always vulnerable to bullies, terribly! Bullies need to be taught a lesson, then we must learn how NOT to be set up and manipulated by narcissist types!! Socially what others get naturally we need to be taught, your his great teacher Jan and gifted privilege ~~
@@sbsman4998 Many things change. Just in my short 48 years, I've seen things greatly improve for people on spectrum in some of the places I've lived, while not getting worse in the exceptions. We're a long way from being accepted by most of the people in any of those areas, mind you. But when I was in the fifth grade, being diagnosed with autism in the school system I was in at the time got you put in remedial education, regardless of your capabilities. Now they test your capabilities, and you could wind up in a gifted program or normal classes instead. When I started working with my employer, people on spectrum were tolerated. My employer's policy prohibited firing someone because they were on spectrum. Now, they actually seek out people on spectrum, especially for positions in IT or engineering, where it's obviously beneficial. But even in other areas, hiring managers are encouraged to employ a diverse team, and that's defined in terms of race, capability, and whether people are or aren't on spectrum. In the course of my life, I've lived four different places where I was either there for more than a decade, or I returned and spent a significant amount of time after over a decade from when I'd first moved there. In three of those four places, between when I was first there and when I was last there, the attitude seemed to change from mostly thinking of people on spectrum as handicapped to thinking of them as the people most likely to become more skilled experts in the things that they focus on. Four places is, of course, not statistically significant, but it's at least anecdotally promising.
Diagnosed at 49- even tho I had a son diagnosed at age 2 & 1/2…. But It wasn’t for another 12 years before doctors told me I also had autism … I PRAISE THE LORD for our uniqueness:) and we have never seen it negatively as the world does- WE DONT NEED FIXING… it’s the system that’s broken!!!
I was recently diagnosed at 34. It was a lot to take in and accept. It’s been lonely, especially when your family exclude you and can’t accept you for who you’re. It makes it incredibly hard to make friends and trust you’re good enough no matter how good you try to be. No matter what you excel in… it goes unacknowledged and you continue to go unnoticed just like those of us who feel through the cracks.
I just broke and had a crying moment. I always cry when I watch these videos on Aspergers even though I've never been diagnosed. Sometimes it just feels good to cry .
Just diagnosed today ,aged 50! I feel relieved in a way but also deep in thought of everything that's happened and how I struggled to stay here . Time for self learning and acceptance ❤️
these quotes that she said "Most Autistic people don't actually suffer from our Autism, we suffer from the way the world sees and treats our Autism." "To the world, my brain is broken. And when the world treats someone like they're broken that person will slowly come to accept that brokenness as fact." i feel the same way, the world does not accept us in a way that makes us feel valued. we have the ability to do so much but the people are blind, they put us below them.
I think I suffer both from my Autism and the way the world treats me. Sensory issues are not the world's fault. My problems regulating my emotions are not the world's fault. Mean people harassing me because I am different are at fault.
Diagnosed at 49- even tho I had a son diagnosed at age 2 & 1/2…. But It wasn’t for another 12 years before doctors told me I also had autism … I PRAISE THE LORD for our uniqueness:) and we have never seen it negatively as the world does- WE DONT NEED FIXING… it’s the system that’s broken!!! I been a chameleon all my life… I’m glad now, that I can be me
"... remaining non-functional for hours afterwards..." I'm an asperger and this is the worst. I can relate so much! Especially at work this is awful. After even light disagreements, I can't forget about it, and can't concentrate anymore. Then, my brain is all chaotic.
Consider that you may also be ADHD. I'm ADHD and Autistic. Now I'm on medication foto address my ADHD and its been very healing for me. I also go through that deep anxiety, but over the years, I;m less and less affected, but it's still quite powerful. The work with the ADHD has been helping.
Daniel day Lewis character in the phantom thread was like this. A house guest was scraping burnt crust off her toast during the normally quiet breakfast and it set him off. He couldn’t work that day. I completely related to that scene!
I found out I was Aspie at age 44 when my son's consultant gave him his diagnosis of Aspergers and severe ADHD at age 5 and said to me "I've only got to be in the room with you for 30 seconds to know where he gets it from". Read this book. I read the book and it described me to an absolute T.
Diagnosed at 49- even tho I had a son diagnosed at age 2 & 1/2…. But It wasn’t for another 12 years before doctors told me I also had autism … I PRAISE THE LORD for our uniqueness:) and we have never seen it negatively as the world does- WE DONT NEED FIXING… it’s the system that’s broken!!! I been a chameleon all my life… I’m glad now, that I can be me
This is exactly why I'm studying to become a high school teacher, with a bigger passion than I ever had for anything.. Thank you, we need more people like you in this world.
Diagnosed at 49- even tho I had a son diagnosed at age 2 & 1/2…. But It wasn’t for another 12 years before doctors told me I also had autism … I PRAISE THE LORD for our uniqueness:) and we have never seen it negatively as the world does- WE DONT NEED FIXING… it’s the system that’s broken!!!
it took me 24 years to finally know this part of myself after completely burning out and attempting multiple times. suddenly everything makes sense. i was never broken 💛
Diagnosed at 49- even tho I had a son diagnosed at age 2 & 1/2…. But It wasn’t for another 12 years before doctors told me I also had autism … I PRAISE THE LORD for our uniqueness:) and we have never seen it negatively as the world does- WE DONT NEED FIXING… it’s the system that’s broken!!! I been a chameleon all my life… I’m glad now, that I can be me
got diagnosed with 28 and its only thanks to people like her. im so thankful and also feel the responsibility to help. if i can prevent one person from suffering like i did, then its worth it. we are valid and we belong
I'm 15 and just got diagnosed. This talk made me feel so validated. I am so good at masking I, myself, didn't even notice once I could be on the spectrum. In fact, I got tested for ADHD, because I thought I could have that. I also got tested on things like anxiety, depression and autism, because some of the syptomes overlap with ADHD. The day I got my diagnosis, my world was shook. So much things suddenly started to make sense. I don't hate myself for being autistic. I hate how people treat me for being autistic. I am smart, and can in fact understand you very well. For me, my brain and experience are the default. Until I learned it wasn't. And that's ok.
Also it’s extremely for women and girls to get diagnosed later in life because they tend be able to mask most of the social interaction issues better then men and boys who tend to get diagnosed earlier in life.
Diagnosed at 49- even tho I had a son diagnosed at age 2 & 1/2…. But It wasn’t for another 12 years before doctors told me I also had autism … I PRAISE THE LORD for our uniqueness:) and we have never seen it negatively as the world does- WE DONT NEED FIXING… it’s the system that’s broken!!! I been a chameleon all my life… I’m glad now, that I can be me
I was diagnosed with Asperger’s on Christmas Eve 2021. I’m 52 & haven’t stopped crying since. 2 years before my diagnosis I was engaged to be married & in my 23rd year as an educator. Today I’m fighting depression to stay alive. No longer engaged or a career left. I’m so tired. Thank you for your words. 🙏🏼 I appreciate you.💜
what happened to cause the loss of job and fiance ???? you were asd all those 23 years you were doing great...was it the DX that ruined things for you ..???
You,I and all women are going through this together. I'm 48 and self diagnosed myself 1 month ago. My austisic ex co-worker, temp job, stated that he thought that as well. A week before I brought it up. I have no support, and it's so freaking hard!!! You are a great person just as you are. I am mad too!! I see why people with autism life expectancy are around 54. You , I, and all women having a late aged diagnosis are very important, and we will be OK. God bless you, and thank you for being you!!!
Diagnosed @ 40. I had to seek it out. My only source of grief is not knowing sooner. I'm not sad or sorry I'm Autistic. I'm sad we have to fight to be treated with respect.
Yes. Respect is sorely needed in this world...for all. Everyone is different; we are all unique. Even though we are social animals (we need others) condemning differences hurts everyone; hurts our world.
Diagnosed at 49- even tho I had a son diagnosed at age 2 & 1/2…. But It wasn’t for another 12 years before doctors told me I also had autism … I PRAISE THE LORD for our uniqueness:) and we have never seen it negatively as the world does- WE DONT NEED FIXING… it’s the system that’s broken!!! I been a chameleon all my life… I’m glad now, that I can be me
I'm 30 years old and waiting to be diagnosed, waiting to find out who I am and why I am like this. Waiting for someone to tell me how to stop being affraid all the time, take a deep breath and discover the world again. But I'm already greatful for everybody who stand up and try to convince the world, convince me, that we are not broken.
Diagnosed at 49- even tho I had a son diagnosed at age 2 & 1/2…. But It wasn’t for another 12 years before doctors told me I also had autism … I PRAISE THE LORD for our uniqueness:) and we have never seen it negatively as the world does- WE DONT NEED FIXING… it’s the system that’s broken!!! I been a chameleon all my life… I’m glad now, that I can be me
YOU are the brightest star out there! YOUR words are so powerful and sincere that the rest of us, "the normal us", are amazed at listening to you! I have learned way more from people with autism than I have ever learned from the universities I attended, among the best ones in the world. YOU are the light that shines so brightly in the dark, you are the luck of my life! Thank YOU! Will be fighting for you and your rights till the end of time!
Diagnosed at 49- even tho I had a son diagnosed at age 2 & 1/2…. But It wasn’t for another 12 years before doctors told me I also had autism … I PRAISE THE LORD for our uniqueness:) and we have never seen it negatively as the world does- WE DONT NEED FIXING… it’s the system that’s broken!!! I been a chameleon all my life… I’m glad now, that I can be me
Just diagnosed at 51 male, good at masking. Except when in a meltdown, I was just seen as angry, not violent because their boundaries are different. Thank you
I’m going on 60 and I’m still invisible because I was highly masking pre-post traumatic stress disorder. Now the c-PTSD doesn’t give me anywhere to hide anymore and the autism traits became more obvious since. I took all the online tests and « if there were a scale » I’d be in the deep end. All I can say is what a relief. Finally. It’s a gift but this world doesn’t make a lot of space for « diffferent »
55 here! Also slipped through the cracks ! Struggling my whole life and only coming to the realization when my daughter was pregnant and her genetic tests came back with Fragile X mutation! Once I saw the link to autism it all clicked!! Now we are trying to have my youngest daughter tested, she displays many of the same characteristics as me ! It is validating for sure!
Great speech Tashi! I figured out I was autistic at age 45. It was such a huge revelation and it gave me a great sense of freedom. Thank You so much for sharing your story!
I was diagnosed at the same age. I get a lot of stigmatized attitudes towards me when I share it. Instead of accepting me, they find me imperfect especially in the job field. It's demoralizing and discouraging. See our strengths first please not our weaknesses.
I LOVED your explanation of the range of how people with ASD experience different areas of their life, i.e. "Red could be social communication." Thank you!
I was diagnosed in my senior year of high school. I could have excelled in school instead of barely passing. Luckily, I'm going to college. One that understands why I struggled and is willing to help me.
I am happy for you. I also like your "ace" of spades. Don't do what I have btw, I was super stubborn in college and refused all of the help they offered me.
Daughter, PDD-NOS at 17, told by diagnostician to just read about Asperger's, you'll do fine. No suggestion to look for schools that can understand and support her. She completely fell apart her first year of college and hid it from everyone because (as we learned much later) she believed she disappointed everyone and was a failure. It took years for her to go back to someone for re-diagnosis.
@@vickitoback3001 That's why I'm not too fond of the asperger's label. Many psychologists just started calling it autism. We need help and understanding. Maybe you could have her do prerequisites online and then switch her over to an autism-friendly school. Usually the smaller schools are a lot better and getting a single helps.
I was diagnosed in the 6th grade and am now a freshman. My symptoms didn't show up fully, by that I mean, they were small little instances that neither me nor anyone else really noticed, but in 4th grade they were suddenly like: *HEY I EXIST ADULTS DIAGNOSE ME RIGHT NOW I'M HERE C'MON NOW LOOOOOOOKATMEEEEE*
As an un-diagnosed Aspergian, life is god damned cruel and lonely, filled with irrational people controlled by emotion and urges. And yea, suicide often seems like the most rational solution. And I'm so bloody tired of people going "Oh but we're all weird.", "We all go through some hard times", "It gets better" or even "Isn't there a treatment?". You're not all weird and different; there's reason the word 'normal' or 'average' exists. Not everyone is mistreated, misunderstood and abandoned to the point of not wanting to be alive. Statistically, it does not get better, in any way shape or form. And its not a god damned illness; considering we'd likely be better off as a species if Aperger's was the norm, which is why some professionals even stipulate its the next step in evolution.
Totally agree with you! Been working with students with autistic disorders for a lifetime and I LOVE THEM ALL, NO matter what! They are way better than the "normal us". Even the light in their eyes shines more brightly than mine! These people are SO special that I will never stop to battle for their rights!
@@CLB134 I am just a humble teacher and educator. I have learned from you much more than I have ever learned from the best universities in the world I have attended. Thank You!
in the process of getting a clinical diagnosis right now at the age of 37, but been self diagnosed and also have had affirmation from 2 psychologists in the past. This journey has been both frightening as well as extremely weightlifting its just a sudden moment of clarity for the first time in my life and i can begin to explain all of the quirks and oddities that have plagued me since i was a child. what a relief, but also so so scary as now i have answers but have to learn coping mechanisms. but then it gets happy again as i think about how i may finally maintain friendships, maintain a relationship, have a way to be understood, find employment that jives with my character, and oh the peace of mind and semi stability. i am proud to be on the autism spectrum. i am unique and different and odd and silly and loyal and brutally honest to a fault and i am finally beginning to love all the me that i can be. thank you so much Tedx for giving Tashi Baiguerra a chance to share her story with the world and shining her bright light on us all. what a wonderful talk!
This! "Most Autistic people don't actually suffer from our Autism, we suffer from the way the world sees and treats our Autism." So true of so many of us that are 'othered' for who we are.
So beautifully spoken. My son is on the spectrum and as he’s grown these few years, we discover how much my husband is like him. He’s 35. Your memes, funny enough, really help me understand their world and I love it. Thank you.
Just at the beginning of discovering who I am, I've had suspicions for a while and finally spoke to a family friend who is autistic (and who was diagnosed in her 40's) and she told me it's likely...I'm not 100% sure where I want to go from here but just knowing that I'm not "wrong" or "strange" was like a weight lifted. I'm now looking into it so much more and working out what support I need going forward xx
I started realizing I might be autistic and ADHD about 2 or 3 years ago, and was finally diagnosed this past February at 33 years old. I always knew I was different somehow, but didn't know how to articulate it - other people's behaviors often didn't make sense to me, and social norms were extremely difficult for me to learn how to perform. Masking got me through life, but I never realized that it was also affecting my anxiety and depression - that the twice-yearly breakdowns that would have me stuck in bed for hours crying and feeling like I was so overwhelmed with just existing were autistic meltdowns caused by constantly masking and trying to fight against who I am; that my inability to do even basic tasks before I started suspecting my diagnosis, at the end of my last relationship, was due to autistic burnout and not simply depression. Being able to accept myself for who I am, and all of the pros and cons that come with it, has really helped to bring peace to my life. I do still get overwhelmed, but I haven't had a meltdown in months and I haven't had a panic attack in over 7 years. Part of that may be due to desensitization from being in a traumatic and abusive relationship for 3 years, but I don't want to discount the reduction in general "existence" stress that has come from it.
Late diagnosed at 50 with ASD2 and ADHD. I am "2e" gifted and high IQ and disabled. "2e" means "twice exceptional" it's been a looong road to finally get here and finally have my disgnosis.
I was literally banging my head on the ground as a kid and I had no friends and I was always in my own little world, and it didn’t throw any red flags. I’m now 45 years old and trying to get diagnosed.
It's hard to be different, but god it's so much harder to try and be the same... I think. You tell your story, this tiny part of it, really well. Thanks for stepping up.
At age 59I found out three years ago and I had believed that something was different about myself. My diagnosis was cathartic as the dots connected with my life and in particular my youth and past. Everything now makes sense to me.
Thank you so much. You've touched my heart and soul. Amazing speech. You touched all the symptoms, characteristics, impacts and created a realistic view of our disorder. You have my respect beyond respect. I wish you well.
Ever since I was little I never knew how to interact with people or get started with things...I always thought that as I get older I will learn it...but here I am as a teenager and I still don't know how to interact with people or the world...When I tell adults I feel lost they say every teenager feels lost..but i feel like I might have undiagnosed autism.
I had the exact same thoughts when I was little. I thought it was because I was young and I’d grow out of it but I never did. Now I’m pretty much 100% positive my son is autistic and I’ve had this feeling in my gut since the day he was born, he’s 4 now. You can’t tell just by looking at him or being around him a while so everyone thinks I’m nuts but I know better!! I know myself and my son. Both of us are In the process of getting evaluated. I’m 33 and my whole family missed it my whole life. The only thing I’ve ever been diagnosed with is generalized anxiety but I knew they were full of it.
I slipped through the cracks. I was diagnosed at sixty five. It has been a great gift. I;m healing. I totally agree with different brains working together. I believe Autistics, we can work together in an egalitarian way far more easily that Aulistic people. They are competitive and in my experience, tend to be treacherously competitive. They are not interested in the actually work so much as the social aspects and in competing even at the expense of others. That;s the way they believe the world works. I don;t like that world view. I;m not saying every Neurtypical person is like this, but that;s been my experience.
Beautiful speech, very inspiring. I cried a lot while watching this. I dont have an autism but my son has. He was diagnosed with ASD last year. Thank you very much for having beautiful brain and beautiful heart to inspire other. God bless you.
Diagnosed at 49- even tho I had a son diagnosed at age 2 & 1/2…. But It wasn’t for another 12 years before doctors told me I also had autism … I PRAISE THE LORD for our uniqueness:) and we have never seen it negatively as the world does- WE DONT NEED FIXING… it’s the system that’s broken!!! I been a chameleon all my life… I’m glad now, that I can be me
Many of us on the spectrum who go all the way to a PhD, especially in the likes of physics and math, have a duty to come out of the closet and use what we succeeded, even though more can be ascribed to luck of being in a right place at the right time than our maximum effort, in accomplishing it to vindicate our human dignity. My PhD got me what a GED gets normal people and without it I could never get a job. This partly overcomes society's racism against autistic people who are regarded as a subhuman race.
I have two masters degrees and went through years of no one hiring me. I am 40 (having been diagnosed 30 years ago before anyone knew what Asperger's even was) and only now am starting to get the jobs I deserve, and only because I work in a disability organization. I never got hired, and people with less education and knowledge, but more "charisma" always got the jobs. Even was homeless for a time. I am trying to speaking out more lately because so many people are self-diagnosing nowadays. I feel like it almost insults the pain I have suffered for years, when people without autism who are eccentric diagnose themselves, many who have youtube channels! I don't know what to make of it, as all these people are making videos about their self diagnosis, but all I see are people with autistic traits, not full blown autism. It's hard, and today I probably wouldn't get SSI even if I applied again because Asperger's people aren't getting help the way they they used to. I blame these watered down misdiagnoses. Anyway it's painful.
THANK YOU TASHI FOR YOUR BEAUTIFUL COURAGE AND VULNERABILITY. FOR YOUR BEAUTIFUL MISSION. THE WORLD NEEDS MORE OF THIS. AND I SEE YOU. LOUD AND CLEAR. AND YOUR ARE AWESOME.
And many people with Aspergers dont show much emotion, but we DO feel them inside. Often we don't understand what we feel. But we experience them. It's just that our brains might be busy with categorizing and sorting all the input we get through our senses, so there's no concentration left to reflect our emotional state... unless we experience intense sorrow, anger or any of the 6 basic emotions. Personally, I've had to LEARN how and when to show what emotion and body language, and it's immediately clear when I forget it, or am in doubt of what to show or how to react for the other part to understand me correctly. It doesn't come naturally for me. I've had to craft a "dictionary" in my brain with what emotion/body language correlates to what feeling. It's a daily struggle, but little by little, it can be overcome.... but it would CERTAINLY be easier if the general population knew more about high functioning autism. It really helps to get an understanding if you have a friend who's on the Autism Spectrum. I can only speak for myself and how I personally experience Aspergers. Always keep that in mind that we're 10% Aspergers (even though it feels like more) and 90% our selves :) Autism as a whole may be an evolutionary deficit, but unless it's infantile Autism, people with Aspergers can participate in society and make invaluable contributions. Many are yet to experience their unique potential. I'm 32 years old and have a well payed job, although employed at reduced hours and under certain circumstances. But I'm a valued workforce and I can see I make a real difference.
I was diagnosed at age 24. I had the same struggles as this lady, but had slipped through the cracks. I’d been made to believe all that time and still to this very day that something is wrong with me and that I wasn’t normal. It was a chance meeting with a clinical psychologist who didn’t specialise autism, but recognised the signs and asked if he could refer me to his colleagues for an evaluation. As a 24 year, not much could be offered in terms of support, but recovering the diagnosis allowed me to understand myself a little better. I know now that I’m not broken and that I don’t need fixing, I’m just different that’s all.
Thank you I'm 22 speechless I naeded to here that more than ever. I know exactly what you saying about being different and every one around you knowing it to and no matter how hard you try and knowing youl never be one of those pegs that fit in one of the holes in Society or around your friends or even people you have a romantic interest in.
Diagnosed at 49- even tho I had a son diagnosed at age 2 & 1/2…. But It wasn’t for another 12 years before doctors told me I also had autism … I PRAISE THE LORD for our uniqueness:) and we have never seen it negatively as the world does- WE DONT NEED FIXING… it’s the system that’s broken!!! I been a chameleon all my life… I’m glad now, that I can be me
Awesome young woman. She isn’t broken, her brain is just wired differently. My husband, daughter, and both of my granddaughters are all on the Autism Spectrum.
Our world is vast as is the autistic spectrum. We pretend to know our world. yet we do not atleast not completely .we skim only surface with world and autism. We are not broken nor do we need fixing . We just need acceptance through others curiosity and like inception be an integral part to our evolving world rather than revolving world. We need to change our views on autismto be the change we want to see.
If our world was foundry for weapons and our world decided we had to be a certain and size That world is. Not innovative it is compliant inhuman and a weaker idea rather than asking the right questions in order for better co-operation,trust,a larger scope for better business ideas and outcomes and to do this in order to make somebodys future and a companys future better with right understanding and simplicity which is perhaps overlooked.
I was diagnosed in Germany in 2019, still as Asperger. There are physiological consequences of trying to function "normally", which are different per individual cases. Like for me it's stressful to be in an open office environment and this is noticeable in the adrenals. People masking endure more stress. Stress ultimately has effects on the body. Many have autoimmune diseases, allergies and food sensitivity ( not meant in texture but content).
Nice video. I am 34 years, yet to be diagnosed officially .However most of the traits and some more are a part/parcel of my life. Having difficulties sustaining relationships and having an awkward social life to being called lazy or unable to make your loved ones understand you is a nightmare for us aspies and those on the spectrum. Even we have difficulties getting diagnosed by trained professionals and endure suffering like bullying during schooling- problems like anxiety, depression, SAD. Hope we in future will get a proper channel to communicate ourselves to the world. People like you are a beacon of hope to us High functioning ASPIES. Thank you!
I am 40 years old and was diagnosed in the early 90s were Asperger's just started to be something being diagnosed. That's 30 years! It was isolating as a child to be the only one I literally knew anywhere that had it. No one knew what it was back then. I should give my own TED talk. I feel that a lot of people are over-diagnosing themselves and many people are finding it harder and harder to get the services they need because more people who are not autistic are misdiagnosing themselves and seeking diagnosis. When I was a kid, I could actually get federal funding and welfare to support me (ie SSI in the USA), but now it's very hard to get that with an Asperger's diagnosis in particular. So many youtube videos that are posted and people saying they are "autistic" and yet none of the things they discuss remind me of the actually real issues people with autism face (not in totality I mean). There is a disconnect going on with these self diagnosis going on. People who are actually autistic aren't getting the help they need because others self diagnose themselves because they do "quirky things" or have obsessive interests in things, etc etc. These are "autistic traits," not full blown autism. I learned the hard way through my own life what it is on my own without anyone who knew anything about it, except Tony Attwood who was the only one talking about it at the time. I fear this over and misdiagnosis is causing people on the actual spectrum to suffer more and diagnosis are getting more and more watered down. God help all the truly autistic people who need help and God help all the ones looking for answers about their peculiar quirks and habits (who maybe have some autistic traits) that abuse this diagnosis and harm ASD people in the process.
You are a whole person , a beautiful soul, so much to give , a beautiful wisdom to be proud on, you may see to others its good, knowing of the two sides, its a gift ...to grow, to be chapeau, kind regards.
Tashi summarized our current social unease, since we now divide humans according to race, skin color, our phenotypes. But, what truly separates man as a species is the reasoning mind. Being an Autistic, I can guaranteed my "reasoning" differs from most, seemingly all autistics have similar commonalities, enough so to be named a separate species of human, HomoAutistica ~~
5:55 "Most Autistic people don't actually suffer from our Autism, we suffer from the way the world sees and treats our Autism."
"To the world, my brain is broken. And when the world treats someone like they're broken that person will slowly come to accept that brokenness as fact."
This quote broke me...
Im Writeing this down. Best line in the speech. OMG.
Diagnosed at 19, figured it out on my own and asked for it. If I had not, I doubt anyone would have noticed. I cannot pretend to be normal any longer at the cost of my energy and mental health. We must all strive to be ourselves.
@@paulastone7644 likewise, was diagnosed at 19yrs-old, there was so much evidence of being being autistic years beforehand too...
I found out i was Aspie at age 44, currently age 49 I've never bothered going and getting an official diagnosis. Why? Because although normal people annoy, infuriate and irritate me beyond measure I know what my self worth is. I'm smarter than 99.99% of people on this planet, I see and understand things very few people ever will. I have a lovely son and a wierd but lovely wife.
Diagnosed at 19, figured it out on my own and asked for it. If I had not, I doubt anyone would have noticed. I cannot pretend to be normal any longer at the cost of my energy and mental health. We must all strive to be ourselves.
@Frederic Bastiat Same. I'm only being diagnosed now at 24, it's been a lifetime of struggling to fit in and pouring my energy into masking. This diagnose has, in many ways, released me.
Agreed.
@Frederic Bastiat Same for me, as well.
@@BeneathFullMoon Also ths way for me, as well.
You are so right and I'm so happy you achieve it.
Diagnosed at age 37. It was life-changing. When you find out WHY you are "the way that you are," you want to shout it from the rooftops so nobody else has to spend a portion of their life questioning their identity. Feeling like an alien on Earth.
maybe i can help u
I need to be diagnosed. My daughter got her diagnosis at age 6, which is lucky for her, and even though she is literally a mini-me (like she IS me) nobody got ME checked out. Nobody tested me. And I need to be tested, but am not sure how to go about it
Mama_in_pyjammas maybe speak about it with the people who diagnosed her? Weird that they didn’t ask you about it, often times they also assess the family, from what i’ve heard. If not maybe just go to your gp and say exactly what you said here, how your girl is a mini you and recognize everything that she has been diagnosed with. Good luck.
@@s.devries2644 I hope that when one family member tests positive for autism, the psychologists you are referring to ask for consent before testing the other members in the family. Testing multiple people in the family is logical though.
YES to all of this. ❤
"you only experience me mildly" THESE ARE THE WORDS I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR I love this
so do I
I’m not crying. I promise I’m not crying.
Och away. Of course you are. So am I - diagnosed at 62.
And I'll act like I'm not crying with you 😢
It’s a terrible day for it to rain.
Good, because this video is dogshit.
39 years... today I received the keys to understanding myself
My name’s Amara, and I have Aspergers too!
38 years for me. Now that I know, I keep asking myself HOW did I NOT know? How did anyone else not know??
It's amazing, isn't it? Do you still have moments when you think about your younger self in a new perspective, one that perhaps no one else knew?
Same here. 36 and found out on the 2nd Feb.
So many light switches went on at once. 180° turnaround from how I used to view my life.
I studied psychology (dropped out just before graduating) and looked for answers in many other ways, but never once thought I could be on the Autism spectrum!
Have any of you talked to your family and friends about it? When I try to explain Aspergers and convey to my family what a major life discovery this is for me, I'm met with blank looks and a change of subject...
42 here. some weeks ago i started investigating autism. yesterday i found PDA which is spot on.
I was pretty sure I was autistic like 20 years ago. I brought it up and was laugh at by mental health professionals, you can imagine by other people. I wasn't "autistic enough", I was "too smart", "too functional", whatever that means. I increasingly felt I was going crazy.
After a life of depression, among other things, and many misdiagnosis (like bipolar and similar), now that I'm almost 40 I tried again, with all new studies about female ASD on hand, and got diagnosed: ASD, who would have known... me!?
Underdiagnosis and misdiagnosis are way higher for women.
I'm happy things change, and hope, like Tashi, for the day people with autism really don't know the road was bumpy to begin with.
I was only diagnosed with aspergers at 31, I am one of those who "slipped through the cracks". Thank you for this ❤️
Mid 20s for me They ended up saying PDD-NOS instead of Aspergers because it was so late.
Diagnosed at age 52, no doctors or psychologist ever suspected. It was only after 20 years with my wife, she suspected I could be on the spectrum.
I am 52 and still slipping through the cracks
I was diagnosed with Aspergers at 23 now 39
Diagnosed at 49- even tho I had a son diagnosed at age 2 & 1/2…. But It wasn’t for another 12 years before doctors told me I also had autism … I PRAISE THE LORD for our uniqueness:) and we have never seen it negatively as the world does- WE DONT NEED FIXING… it’s the system that’s broken!!!
If you experience your life as an ILLNESS, You remain in the hospital. If you experience your life as an IDENTITY, You become liberated and That Identity becomes the source of your power.
Very intresting prespective!
Ty!
Well said
🤩
I LOVE this, thank you !
OR, get this, you get ostracized and want to die, but sure, go off or whatever.
My grandson has Autism and he’s extremely sensitive to what others say. He’s
11 years of age and l’m concerned at the way the world see this beautiful wee boy .
Some people judge and don’t understand. This is what hurts the most.
Agreed
I'd say the worst are the ones who understand, fear, and react offensively, thinking it's the best defence.
Not that they'd admit to understanding. They just see that this is a person who has abilities that they lack, but also have weaknesses they can exploit.
Your wee boy is in for it, I fear Jan. I am autistic male 75, and only now have allowed myself to be wonderfully Autistic, finally no masks, no masks to wear in the working/academic worlds to get along make money. Why wonderful? Take the pandemic for instance, everyone here in Calif is complaining about lockdowns, social isolation, no problem here, except for wearing a mask life is same for me, actually glad others don't get too close physically, creeps me out! Stressing out, isolated from others, outcasted for my differences, all daily obstacles to overcome dealing with others, always. Now retired, few bucks in the bank, nice place in country to enjoy solitude near my wild critters. Understand Jan, things do not change, Autistic for life we be! Few things helped me early on, firstly my parents allowed me free guilt free alone time, lots of books, no pressures, then my life long obsessions: craftmanship (keep hands busy), martial arts including medicine anatomy Biology and especially important for all youth daily physical strength training, knowing self-defense well, self assurance. People view Autistics as weak, indeed socially we are and always vulnerable to bullies, terribly! Bullies need to be taught a lesson, then we must learn how NOT to be set up and manipulated by narcissist types!! Socially what others get naturally we need to be taught, your his great teacher Jan and gifted privilege ~~
@@sbsman4998 Many things change. Just in my short 48 years, I've seen things greatly improve for people on spectrum in some of the places I've lived, while not getting worse in the exceptions. We're a long way from being accepted by most of the people in any of those areas, mind you. But when I was in the fifth grade, being diagnosed with autism in the school system I was in at the time got you put in remedial education, regardless of your capabilities. Now they test your capabilities, and you could wind up in a gifted program or normal classes instead.
When I started working with my employer, people on spectrum were tolerated. My employer's policy prohibited firing someone because they were on spectrum. Now, they actually seek out people on spectrum, especially for positions in IT or engineering, where it's obviously beneficial. But even in other areas, hiring managers are encouraged to employ a diverse team, and that's defined in terms of race, capability, and whether people are or aren't on spectrum.
In the course of my life, I've lived four different places where I was either there for more than a decade, or I returned and spent a significant amount of time after over a decade from when I'd first moved there. In three of those four places, between when I was first there and when I was last there, the attitude seemed to change from mostly thinking of people on spectrum as handicapped to thinking of them as the people most likely to become more skilled experts in the things that they focus on.
Four places is, of course, not statistically significant, but it's at least anecdotally promising.
Diagnosed at 49- even tho I had a son diagnosed at age 2 & 1/2…. But It wasn’t for another 12 years before doctors told me I also had autism … I PRAISE THE LORD for our uniqueness:) and we have never seen it negatively as the world does- WE DONT NEED FIXING… it’s the system that’s broken!!!
"Until one day there will be children born who never knew the road was bumpy in the first place" 😭😭Beautiful words!
I was recently diagnosed at 34. It was a lot to take in and accept. It’s been lonely, especially when your family exclude you and can’t accept you for who you’re. It makes it incredibly hard to make friends and trust you’re good enough no matter how good you try to be. No matter what you excel in… it goes unacknowledged and you continue to go unnoticed just like those of us who feel through the cracks.
I just broke and had a crying moment. I always cry when I watch these videos on Aspergers even though I've never been diagnosed. Sometimes it just feels good to cry .
Me too!
Me too!
Just diagnosed today ,aged 50! I feel relieved in a way but also deep in thought of everything that's happened and how I struggled to stay here .
Time for self learning and acceptance ❤️
"I can't separate my Aspergers from myself...and I don't think I want to...not anymore"
Preach it sister!
Literally just accepting your worthlessness, yeah, great.
As a neurodivergent (ADHD) I relate so much to this. Thank you for helping me understand I’m not broken❤
I got diagnosed early on because I had a teacher that cared why I was failing tests that I shouldn't have.
these quotes that she said
"Most Autistic people don't actually suffer from our Autism, we suffer from the way the world sees and treats our Autism."
"To the world, my brain is broken. And when the world treats someone like they're broken that person will slowly come to accept that brokenness as fact."
i feel the same way, the world does not accept us in a way that makes us feel valued.
we have the ability to do so much but the people are blind, they put us below them.
I think I suffer both from my Autism and the way the world treats me. Sensory issues are not the world's fault. My problems regulating my emotions are not the world's fault. Mean people harassing me because I am different are at fault.
Ime NT's won't accept help from an Aspergian as that puts us above them.
Diagnosed at 49- even tho I had a son diagnosed at age 2 & 1/2…. But It wasn’t for another 12 years before doctors told me I also had autism … I PRAISE THE LORD for our uniqueness:) and we have never seen it negatively as the world does- WE DONT NEED FIXING… it’s the system that’s broken!!!
I been a chameleon all my life… I’m glad now, that I can be me
"... remaining non-functional for hours afterwards..." I'm an asperger and this is the worst. I can relate so much! Especially at work this is awful. After even light disagreements, I can't forget about it, and can't concentrate anymore. Then, my brain is all chaotic.
Consider that you may also be ADHD. I'm ADHD and Autistic. Now I'm on medication foto address my ADHD and its been very healing for me. I also go through that deep anxiety, but over the years, I;m less and less affected, but it's still quite powerful. The work with the ADHD has been helping.
Daniel day Lewis character in the phantom thread was like this. A house guest was scraping burnt crust off her toast during the normally quiet breakfast and it set him off. He couldn’t work that day.
I completely related to that scene!
Nobody saw the real me for 60 years. Just coming out now.
Good for you, you're very brave!
❤❤❤
Welcome, Sue.
I found out I was Aspie at age 44 when my son's consultant gave him his diagnosis of Aspergers and severe ADHD at age 5 and said to me "I've only got to be in the room with you for 30 seconds to know where he gets it from". Read this book.
I read the book and it described me to an absolute T.
Welcome
I'm 20 years old studying nursing and I just found out I have Asperger. And bcoz of that I love myself even harder.
Me, too. I started nursing school in September. I’m 41.
How? I still want to go around telling my bullies I'm autistic so that I can justify me weirdness. I understand myself but how do I love myself?
Diagnosed at 49- even tho I had a son diagnosed at age 2 & 1/2…. But It wasn’t for another 12 years before doctors told me I also had autism … I PRAISE THE LORD for our uniqueness:) and we have never seen it negatively as the world does- WE DONT NEED FIXING… it’s the system that’s broken!!!
I been a chameleon all my life… I’m glad now, that I can be me
This is exactly why I'm studying to become a high school teacher, with a bigger passion than I ever had for anything.. Thank you, we need more people like you in this world.
Diagnosed at 49- even tho I had a son diagnosed at age 2 & 1/2…. But It wasn’t for another 12 years before doctors told me I also had autism … I PRAISE THE LORD for our uniqueness:) and we have never seen it negatively as the world does- WE DONT NEED FIXING… it’s the system that’s broken!!!
it took me 24 years to finally know this part of myself after completely burning out and attempting multiple times. suddenly everything makes sense. i was never broken 💛
Diagnosed at 49- even tho I had a son diagnosed at age 2 & 1/2…. But It wasn’t for another 12 years before doctors told me I also had autism … I PRAISE THE LORD for our uniqueness:) and we have never seen it negatively as the world does- WE DONT NEED FIXING… it’s the system that’s broken!!!
I been a chameleon all my life… I’m glad now, that I can be me
One of the best speeches I’ve ever heard
got diagnosed with 28 and its only thanks to people like her. im so thankful and also feel the responsibility to help. if i can prevent one person from suffering like i did, then its worth it. we are valid and we belong
10:45 "It's my responsibility to pave the roads that she will walk on, so future children will not know the road is bumpy"
Tashi FTW
I'm 15 and just got diagnosed. This talk made me feel so validated. I am so good at masking I, myself, didn't even notice once I could be on the spectrum. In fact, I got tested for ADHD, because I thought I could have that. I also got tested on things like anxiety, depression and autism, because some of the syptomes overlap with ADHD.
The day I got my diagnosis, my world was shook. So much things suddenly started to make sense. I don't hate myself for being autistic. I hate how people treat me for being autistic. I am smart, and can in fact understand you very well.
For me, my brain and experience are the default. Until I learned it wasn't. And that's ok.
Also it’s extremely for women and girls to get diagnosed later in life because they tend be able to mask most of the social interaction issues better then men and boys who tend to get diagnosed earlier in life.
Diagnosed at 49- even tho I had a son diagnosed at age 2 & 1/2…. But It wasn’t for another 12 years before doctors told me I also had autism … I PRAISE THE LORD for our uniqueness:) and we have never seen it negatively as the world does- WE DONT NEED FIXING… it’s the system that’s broken!!!
I been a chameleon all my life… I’m glad now, that I can be me
You're not broken, you're brave.
“You may say I have mild autism, but that’s only because you experience me mildly. I don’t experience my autism mildly.”
I was diagnosed with Asperger’s on Christmas Eve 2021. I’m 52 & haven’t stopped crying since. 2 years before my diagnosis I was engaged to be married & in my 23rd year as an educator. Today I’m fighting depression to stay alive. No longer engaged or a career left. I’m so tired. Thank you for your words. 🙏🏼 I appreciate you.💜
what happened to cause the loss of job and fiance ???? you were asd all those 23 years you were doing great...was it the DX that ruined things for you ..???
You,I and all women are going through this together. I'm 48 and self diagnosed myself 1 month ago. My austisic ex co-worker, temp job, stated that he thought that as well. A week before I brought it up. I have no support, and it's so freaking hard!!! You are a great person just as you are. I am mad too!! I see why people with autism life expectancy are around 54. You , I, and all women having a late aged diagnosis are very important, and we will be OK. God bless you, and thank you for being you!!!
Diagnosed @ 40. I had to seek it out. My only source of grief is not knowing sooner. I'm not sad or sorry I'm Autistic. I'm sad we have to fight to be treated with respect.
Yes. Respect is sorely needed in this world...for all. Everyone is different; we are all unique. Even though we are social animals (we need others) condemning differences hurts everyone; hurts our world.
Diagnosed at 49- even tho I had a son diagnosed at age 2 & 1/2…. But It wasn’t for another 12 years before doctors told me I also had autism … I PRAISE THE LORD for our uniqueness:) and we have never seen it negatively as the world does- WE DONT NEED FIXING… it’s the system that’s broken!!!
I been a chameleon all my life… I’m glad now, that I can be me
I'm 30 years old and waiting to be diagnosed, waiting to find out who I am and why I am like this. Waiting for someone to tell me how to stop being affraid all the time, take a deep breath and discover the world again. But I'm already greatful for everybody who stand up and try to convince the world, convince me, that we are not broken.
Diagnosed at 49- even tho I had a son diagnosed at age 2 & 1/2…. But It wasn’t for another 12 years before doctors told me I also had autism … I PRAISE THE LORD for our uniqueness:) and we have never seen it negatively as the world does- WE DONT NEED FIXING… it’s the system that’s broken!!!
I been a chameleon all my life… I’m glad now, that I can be me
"nobody saw me for 21 years" that hit home hard
YOU are the brightest star out there! YOUR words are so powerful and sincere that the rest of us, "the normal us", are amazed at listening to you! I have learned way more from people with autism than I have ever learned from the universities I attended, among the best ones in the world. YOU are the light that shines so brightly in the dark, you are the luck of my life! Thank YOU! Will be fighting for you and your rights till the end of time!
Diagnosed at 49- even tho I had a son diagnosed at age 2 & 1/2…. But It wasn’t for another 12 years before doctors told me I also had autism … I PRAISE THE LORD for our uniqueness:) and we have never seen it negatively as the world does- WE DONT NEED FIXING… it’s the system that’s broken!!!
I been a chameleon all my life… I’m glad now, that I can be me
Just diagnosed at 51 male, good at masking. Except when in a meltdown, I was just seen as angry, not violent because their boundaries are different. Thank you
I just had my diagnosis today age 50! How was you after the diagnosis? Did it change anything?
I’m going on 60 and I’m still invisible because I was highly masking pre-post traumatic stress disorder. Now the c-PTSD doesn’t give me anywhere to hide anymore and the autism traits became more obvious since. I took all the online tests and « if there were a scale » I’d be in the deep end. All I can say is what a relief. Finally. It’s a gift but this world doesn’t make a lot of space for « diffferent »
I know exactly how you feel being an Aspie myself diagnosed at age 34 in 2016! 11:48 -> My arms and my eyes are open too as well! ❤️
55 here! Also slipped through the cracks ! Struggling my whole life and only coming to the realization when my daughter was pregnant and her genetic tests came back with Fragile X mutation! Once I saw the link to autism it all clicked!! Now we are trying to have my youngest daughter tested, she displays many of the same characteristics as me ! It is validating for sure!
Great speech Tashi! I figured out I was autistic at age 45. It was such a huge revelation and it gave me a great sense of freedom. Thank You so much for sharing your story!
My journey has led me here. I don't do well with labels since they don't make sense and usually stereotyped.
I'm with you there; stereotypes are so damaging
I was diagnosed at the same age. I get a lot of stigmatized attitudes towards me when I share it. Instead of accepting me, they find me imperfect especially in the job field. It's demoralizing and discouraging. See our strengths first please not our weaknesses.
I LOVED your explanation of the range of how people with ASD experience different areas of their life, i.e. "Red could be social communication." Thank you!
Every Autistic over 12 should see this video!
I was diagnosed in my senior year of high school. I could have excelled in school instead of barely passing. Luckily, I'm going to college. One that understands why I struggled and is willing to help me.
I am happy for you. I also like your "ace" of spades. Don't do what I have btw, I was super stubborn in college and refused all of the help they offered me.
@@DarkNova69 I signed up for a mentor collective. The mentor is a fellow student to help me with college life so I won't be overwhelmed.
Daughter, PDD-NOS at 17, told by diagnostician to just read about Asperger's, you'll do fine. No suggestion to look for schools that can understand and support her. She completely fell apart her first year of college and hid it from everyone because (as we learned much later) she believed she disappointed everyone and was a failure. It took years for her to go back to someone for re-diagnosis.
@@vickitoback3001 That's why I'm not too fond of the asperger's label. Many psychologists just started calling it autism. We need help and understanding. Maybe you could have her do prerequisites online and then switch her over to an autism-friendly school. Usually the smaller schools are a lot better and getting a single helps.
@@Arlothed1no Thank you for your thoughts. We are working reading between the lines, executive skills, and tolerance.
I wish i was diagnosed, that would make my life easier
I was diagnosed in the 6th grade and am now a freshman. My symptoms didn't show up fully, by that I mean, they were small little instances that neither me nor anyone else really noticed, but in 4th grade they were suddenly like: *HEY I EXIST ADULTS DIAGNOSE ME RIGHT NOW I'M HERE C'MON NOW LOOOOOOOKATMEEEEE*
As an un-diagnosed Aspergian, life is god damned cruel and lonely, filled with irrational people controlled by emotion and urges. And yea, suicide often seems like the most rational solution. And I'm so bloody tired of people going "Oh but we're all weird.", "We all go through some hard times", "It gets better" or even "Isn't there a treatment?". You're not all weird and different; there's reason the word 'normal' or 'average' exists. Not everyone is mistreated, misunderstood and abandoned to the point of not wanting to be alive. Statistically, it does not get better, in any way shape or form. And its not a god damned illness; considering we'd likely be better off as a species if Aperger's was the norm, which is why some professionals even stipulate its the next step in evolution.
Totally agree with you! Been working with students with autistic disorders for a lifetime and I LOVE THEM ALL, NO matter what! They are way better than the "normal us". Even the light in their eyes shines more brightly than mine! These people are SO special that I will never stop to battle for their rights!
Ciprian Gramatik thank you for loving us Autistic folks unconditionally ❤️ you ROCK!!!
@@CLB134 I am just a humble teacher and educator. I have learned from you much more than I have ever learned from the best universities in the world I have attended. Thank You!
I agree.
@@CiprianGramatik that's lovely ☺️
in the process of getting a clinical diagnosis right now at the age of 37, but been self diagnosed and also have had affirmation from 2 psychologists in the past. This journey has been both frightening as well as extremely weightlifting its just a sudden moment of clarity for the first time in my life and i can begin to explain all of the quirks and oddities that have plagued me since i was a child. what a relief, but also so so scary as now i have answers but have to learn coping mechanisms. but then it gets happy again as i think about how i may finally maintain friendships, maintain a relationship, have a way to be understood, find employment that jives with my character, and oh the peace of mind and semi stability. i am proud to be on the autism spectrum. i am unique and different and odd and silly and loyal and brutally honest to a fault and i am finally beginning to love all the me that i can be. thank you so much Tedx for giving Tashi Baiguerra a chance to share her story with the world and shining her bright light on us all. what a wonderful talk!
So eloquent and brave ❤️ Thank you for being such a strong voice for those of us who have yet to be able to put these feelings into words.
This! "Most Autistic people don't actually suffer from our Autism, we suffer from the way the world sees and treats our Autism." So true of so many of us that are 'othered' for who we are.
So beautifully spoken. My son is on the spectrum and as he’s grown these few years, we discover how much my husband is like him. He’s 35. Your memes, funny enough, really help me understand their world and I love it. Thank you.
Just at the beginning of discovering who I am, I've had suspicions for a while and finally spoke to a family friend who is autistic (and who was diagnosed in her 40's) and she told me it's likely...I'm not 100% sure where I want to go from here but just knowing that I'm not "wrong" or "strange" was like a weight lifted. I'm now looking into it so much more and working out what support I need going forward xx
I AM VERY PROUD OF HER.
Thank you for paving the road for my son.
I started realizing I might be autistic and ADHD about 2 or 3 years ago, and was finally diagnosed this past February at 33 years old. I always knew I was different somehow, but didn't know how to articulate it - other people's behaviors often didn't make sense to me, and social norms were extremely difficult for me to learn how to perform. Masking got me through life, but I never realized that it was also affecting my anxiety and depression - that the twice-yearly breakdowns that would have me stuck in bed for hours crying and feeling like I was so overwhelmed with just existing were autistic meltdowns caused by constantly masking and trying to fight against who I am; that my inability to do even basic tasks before I started suspecting my diagnosis, at the end of my last relationship, was due to autistic burnout and not simply depression.
Being able to accept myself for who I am, and all of the pros and cons that come with it, has really helped to bring peace to my life. I do still get overwhelmed, but I haven't had a meltdown in months and I haven't had a panic attack in over 7 years. Part of that may be due to desensitization from being in a traumatic and abusive relationship for 3 years, but I don't want to discount the reduction in general "existence" stress that has come from it.
my ASD makes me feel like I live in a constant state of purgatory, or depression or failure
Exactly! Autism is awful and there's no way around it.
Late diagnosed at 50 with ASD2 and ADHD. I am "2e" gifted and high IQ and disabled. "2e" means "twice exceptional" it's been a looong road to finally get here and finally have my disgnosis.
"People don't really like different...so hard to be different." 😥
I was literally banging my head on the ground as a kid and I had no friends and I was always in my own little world, and it didn’t throw any red flags. I’m now 45 years old and trying to get diagnosed.
By 6 minutes I’m balling because she’s so right!
I cried so much during this. BC I UNDERSTAND. THANK YOU.
It's hard to be different, but god it's so much harder to try and be the same... I think. You tell your story, this tiny part of it, really well. Thanks for stepping up.
Wonderful, insightful comment.
Nope, much harder being different and left out.
At age 59I found out three years ago and I had believed that something was different about myself. My diagnosis was cathartic as the dots connected with my life and in particular my youth and past. Everything now makes sense to me.
Diagnosed at 60.... the big AHA!
60 likes.
At age 56 I was diagnosed with being born with Asperger's. It was like a huge weighted burden was lifted off me.
For the past decade I thought something was different about myself. My diagnosis from a Doctie with a PhD three years ago was truly cathartic
Thank you so much. You've touched my heart and soul. Amazing speech. You touched all the symptoms, characteristics, impacts and created a realistic view of our disorder. You have my respect beyond respect. I wish you well.
I second that.
Nope, deluded awful speech.
Ever since I was little I never knew how to interact with people or get started with things...I always thought that as I get older I will learn it...but here I am as a teenager and I still don't know how to interact with people or the world...When I tell adults I feel lost they say every teenager feels lost..but i feel like I might have undiagnosed autism.
I had the exact same thoughts when I was little. I thought it was because I was young and I’d grow out of it but I never did. Now I’m pretty much 100% positive my son is autistic and I’ve had this feeling in my gut since the day he was born, he’s 4 now. You can’t tell just by looking at him or being around him a while so everyone thinks I’m nuts but I know better!! I know myself and my son. Both of us are In the process of getting evaluated. I’m 33 and my whole family missed it my whole life. The only thing I’ve ever been diagnosed with is generalized anxiety but I knew they were full of it.
Diagnosed at 38...know 40....the world often makes me feel broken
The thing is everyone is different and unique
You beautiful person! Thank you so much 😊
I slipped through the cracks. I was diagnosed at sixty five. It has been a great gift. I;m healing. I totally agree with different brains working together. I believe Autistics, we can work together in an egalitarian way far more easily that Aulistic people. They are competitive and in my experience, tend to be treacherously competitive. They are not interested in the actually work so much as the social aspects and in competing even at the expense of others. That;s the way they believe the world works. I don;t like that world view. I;m not saying every Neurtypical person is like this, but that;s been my experience.
Beautiful speech, very inspiring. I cried a lot while watching this. I dont have an autism but my son has. He was diagnosed with ASD last year. Thank you very much for having beautiful brain and beautiful heart to inspire other. God bless you.
I have Aspergers too, self diagnosed myself at 53. This video made me cry. She is telling exactly how I feel.
Diagnosed at 49- even tho I had a son diagnosed at age 2 & 1/2…. But It wasn’t for another 12 years before doctors told me I also had autism … I PRAISE THE LORD for our uniqueness:) and we have never seen it negatively as the world does- WE DONT NEED FIXING… it’s the system that’s broken!!!
I been a chameleon all my life… I’m glad now, that I can be me
Terrific work Tashi, we always knew you were special!
Many of us on the spectrum who go all the way to a PhD, especially in the likes of physics and math, have a duty to come out of the closet and use what we succeeded, even though more can be ascribed to luck of being in a right place at the right time than our maximum effort, in accomplishing it to vindicate our human dignity.
My PhD got me what a GED gets normal people and without it I could never get a job. This partly overcomes society's racism against autistic people who are regarded as a subhuman race.
I have two masters degrees and went through years of no one hiring me. I am 40 (having been diagnosed 30 years ago before anyone knew what Asperger's even was) and only now am starting to get the jobs I deserve, and only because I work in a disability organization. I never got hired, and people with less education and knowledge, but more "charisma" always got the jobs. Even was homeless for a time. I am trying to speaking out more lately because so many people are self-diagnosing nowadays. I feel like it almost insults the pain I have suffered for years, when people without autism who are eccentric diagnose themselves, many who have youtube channels! I don't know what to make of it, as all these people are making videos about their self diagnosis, but all I see are people with autistic traits, not full blown autism. It's hard, and today I probably wouldn't get SSI even if I applied again because Asperger's people aren't getting help the way they they used to. I blame these watered down misdiagnoses. Anyway it's painful.
my son has a PhD in physics......and was a musical genius at a very young age
What a great talk. Really true words. For all those diagnosed later in life; I can relate ♥️
THANK YOU TASHI FOR YOUR BEAUTIFUL COURAGE AND VULNERABILITY. FOR YOUR BEAUTIFUL MISSION. THE WORLD NEEDS MORE OF THIS. AND I SEE YOU. LOUD AND CLEAR. AND YOUR ARE AWESOME.
well done, almost cried ❤😿
A beautiful talk, so passionate and inspired, thank you!
And many people with Aspergers dont show much emotion, but we DO feel them inside. Often we don't understand what we feel. But we experience them.
It's just that our brains might be busy with categorizing and sorting all the input we get through our senses, so there's no concentration left to reflect our emotional state... unless we experience intense sorrow, anger or any of the 6 basic emotions.
Personally, I've had to LEARN how and when to show what emotion and body language, and it's immediately clear when I forget it, or am in doubt of what to show or how to react for the other part to understand me correctly. It doesn't come naturally for me. I've had to craft a "dictionary" in my brain with what emotion/body language correlates to what feeling.
It's a daily struggle, but little by little, it can be overcome.... but it would CERTAINLY be easier if the general population knew more about high functioning autism. It really helps to get an understanding if you have a friend who's on the Autism Spectrum.
I can only speak for myself and how I personally experience Aspergers. Always keep that in mind that we're 10% Aspergers (even though it feels like more) and 90% our selves :)
Autism as a whole may be an evolutionary deficit, but unless it's infantile Autism, people with Aspergers can participate in society and make invaluable contributions. Many are yet to experience their unique potential.
I'm 32 years old and have a well payed job, although employed at reduced hours and under certain circumstances. But I'm a valued workforce and I can see I make a real difference.
I was diagnosed at age 24. I had the same struggles as this lady, but had slipped through the cracks. I’d been made to believe all that time and still to this very day that something is wrong with me and that I wasn’t normal. It was a chance meeting with a clinical psychologist who didn’t specialise autism, but recognised the signs and asked if he could refer me to his colleagues for an evaluation. As a 24 year, not much could be offered in terms of support, but recovering the diagnosis allowed me to understand myself a little better. I know now that I’m not broken and that I don’t need fixing, I’m just different that’s all.
Thank you I'm 22 speechless I naeded to here that more than ever. I know exactly what you saying about being different and every one around you knowing it to and no matter how hard you try and knowing youl never be one of those pegs that fit in one of the holes in Society or around your friends or even people you have a romantic interest in.
Diagnosed at 49- even tho I had a son diagnosed at age 2 & 1/2…. But It wasn’t for another 12 years before doctors told me I also had autism … I PRAISE THE LORD for our uniqueness:) and we have never seen it negatively as the world does- WE DONT NEED FIXING… it’s the system that’s broken!!!
I been a chameleon all my life… I’m glad now, that I can be me
Awesome young woman. She isn’t broken, her brain is just wired differently. My husband, daughter, and both of my granddaughters are all on the Autism Spectrum.
Yeah, that's called being broken. Quit it with the BS flowery language trying to put a band-aid over real suffering.
Our world is vast as is the autistic spectrum. We pretend to know our world. yet we do not atleast not completely .we skim only surface with world and autism. We are not broken nor do we need fixing . We just need acceptance through others curiosity and like inception be an integral part to our evolving world rather than revolving world. We need to change our views on autismto be the change we want to see.
If our world was foundry for weapons and our world decided we had to be a certain and size
That world is. Not innovative it is compliant inhuman and a weaker idea rather than asking the right questions in order for better co-operation,trust,a larger scope for better business ideas and outcomes and to do this in order to make somebodys future and a companys future better with right understanding and simplicity which is perhaps overlooked.
Everyone is different; we are all unique. Even though we are social animals (we need others) condemning differences hurts everyone; hurts our world.
Thank you so much for sharing
Thank you!
I was diagnosed in Germany in 2019, still as Asperger. There are physiological consequences of trying to function "normally", which are different per individual cases. Like for me it's stressful to be in an open office environment and this is noticeable in the adrenals. People masking endure more stress. Stress ultimately has effects on the body. Many have autoimmune diseases, allergies and food sensitivity ( not meant in texture but content).
Great and true statements such a beautiful young lady
No Thank you beautiful young lady Thank you💐❤💐
Thank you so much !!!!
You are very eloquent. I bet your acting career does well.
Nice video. I am 34 years, yet to be diagnosed officially .However most of the traits and some more are a part/parcel of my life. Having difficulties sustaining relationships and having an awkward social life to being called lazy or unable to make your loved ones understand you is a nightmare for us aspies and those on the spectrum. Even we have difficulties getting diagnosed by trained professionals and endure suffering like bullying during schooling- problems like anxiety, depression, SAD. Hope we in future will get a proper channel to communicate ourselves to the world. People like you are a beacon of hope to us High functioning ASPIES. Thank you!
I am 40 years old and was diagnosed in the early 90s were Asperger's just started to be something being diagnosed. That's 30 years! It was isolating as a child to be the only one I literally knew anywhere that had it. No one knew what it was back then. I should give my own TED talk. I feel that a lot of people are over-diagnosing themselves and many people are finding it harder and harder to get the services they need because more people who are not autistic are misdiagnosing themselves and seeking diagnosis. When I was a kid, I could actually get federal funding and welfare to support me (ie SSI in the USA), but now it's very hard to get that with an Asperger's diagnosis in particular. So many youtube videos that are posted and people saying they are "autistic" and yet none of the things they discuss remind me of the actually real issues people with autism face (not in totality I mean). There is a disconnect going on with these self diagnosis going on. People who are actually autistic aren't getting the help they need because others self diagnose themselves because they do "quirky things" or have obsessive interests in things, etc etc. These are "autistic traits," not full blown autism. I learned the hard way through my own life what it is on my own without anyone who knew anything about it, except Tony Attwood who was the only one talking about it at the time. I fear this over and misdiagnosis is causing people on the actual spectrum to suffer more and diagnosis are getting more and more watered down. God help all the truly autistic people who need help and God help all the ones looking for answers about their peculiar quirks and habits (who maybe have some autistic traits) that abuse this diagnosis and harm ASD people in the process.
You are a force. Thank you!
You are a whole person , a beautiful soul, so much to give , a beautiful wisdom to be proud on, you may see to others its good, knowing of the two sides, its a gift ...to grow, to be chapeau, kind regards.
This resonated so much! We can all learn so much from this 💛
I don't suffer from autism. I suffer from the attitudes of unenlightened people.
Great speech Tashi
17 years and I received the rulebook to understand myself and others.
Tashi summarized our current social unease, since we now divide humans according to race, skin color, our phenotypes. But, what truly separates man as a species is the reasoning mind. Being an Autistic, I can guaranteed my "reasoning" differs from most, seemingly all autistics have similar commonalities, enough so to be named a separate species of human, HomoAutistica ~~