You definitely just changed my life with the question "Do you want to own it, or do you just like that it exists?" I immediately thought of several purchases I've made simply because I was excited by the concept of such a thing and, as you said, wanted to express appreciation for that thing in some tangible way. Oof.
This totally hit for me, too! As ever, Leena says what my brain needs to conceptualize, haha. I *love* certain things but absolutely don't want to maintain them or make a permanent space for them in my life or home.
I celebrate Buy Nothing Day and since I work at a Library we put up a display on crafting, mending, home repair and gardening. 'Do, or do not Do, there is No Buy' is the theme this year. 😆
Before I even watch this video I just HAVE to say that I'm here for every single one of your casual cardigan-off-the-shoulder looks to show off that incredible leopard tattoo. It just looks SO. GOOD.
If you reeeeeeeally don't want to "spoil the fun" by asking people what they want, ask for a list. Me and my family we do that for years now. We give eachother a list of things we like/need and people can choose what they want to buy.
I made a list for myself, but my family members are terrible at making lists for themselves. I've started using the notes feature under their contact in my iPhone whenever they mention they want something. I've gotten everyone 1 things that I've at least heard them say that they will use and my Christmas shopping is nearly done!
I've done this for almost 20 years, since I got into a hobby that had particular requirements. A couple years of getting nice gifts that my family thought were useful for my hobby, but which really weren't, led me to giving them lists with links/colours/sizes, etc with the proviso that these were just suggestions and they could buy a much/little as they wanted, or nothing from it at all. It's worked out really well. They have easy suggestions, and my budget stretches farther, by not having to buy this stuff I really want, but still getting it!
@@BethanyLorene I do this too, throughout the entire year! January 1st, they mention how much they'd like a popcorn maker, slippers, or a foot bath? Great, adding it to the list for next Christmas.
Yup! My family have done this our whole lives and it is baffling to me that it is unpopular. I try to make long lists, so I genuinely never have any idea what I'm getting.
I think it’s sad that “Black Friday” from the US is reaching so many countries. I didn’t realize how powerful this idea of consumerism is until I studied abroad and traveled in Europe during my university years 😬
I feel like minimalism is like the equivalent of an ED of material possessions. So many minimalists I have seen on social media obsess about the amount of things they have, they constantly purge and try to live on less and less, and seem to hyperfocus on the things they do/not have. I think striking a balance is key. Extremes of either excess or deprivation is not healthy.
I think the difference is minimalism can be healthy if that's what ypu really want, but if it's not then you're never going to be happy with it. (Whereas an eating disorder is never healthy)
It definitely was connected to my ED. When I was really poorly with my ED, I found buying anything difficult. All my clothes had holes in and only now I'm doing better I can allow myself to buy new things.
I hate Christmas gifts it’s makes me sound evil but people always give me things I don’t want or need, I’m an adult with my own money I’d rather just buy what I need when I need it and you save your money to buy what you need when you need it. I think Christmas gifts should be for children
I organised with my parents that we don't give each other Christmas presents. They usually ask what I want and then I can't come up with something and it's stressful for everyone, so we just decided not to do it! My wider family does consumable gifts so there's hopefully no waste!
"something else might be missing" THIS happened just two weeks ago - I was looking at my closet thinking 'oh i have no clothes i need to buy new clothes' but figured out NO I was literally just missing one of my shirts! my brain was looking in my closet FOR THAT SHIRT and it took me a long time to realize it was missing and when I found it the feeling of having to buy new clothes vanished!
I’m realizing that this applies to my hand-wash items too! I wear them a few times, but then relegate them to the wash pile, and it takes me ages to get around to washing, and then I feel like I have no clothes, but it’s really a matter of pausing to care for what I have instead of hunting for more!
The second point!!! I genuinely feel so much sadness when I see hobby crafters share something they made for themselves or for a loved one online and the *dominant* response they get is "How do I buy it?" We can appreciate that things exist in the world without needing to buy them or turning the people who made them into capitalists with another side hustle instead of a fun hobby they do for personal fulfillment. And I think that point applies to full-time professional artists as well who price their work at luxury prices and get pushback for not being "accessible." Owning art is a luxury, and the people who make it should be able to support good, full lives with their income. You can still appreciate and support them without demanding their labor come at a low cost to you.
I have mixed feelings about the idea that owning art is a luxury, because i feel that its so central to the human experience. But i do wish more people would make their own art! I think that would also help people understand better why artists charge what they do for their finished works
I so resonate with the “it’s not savings if you wouldn’t have purchased it otherwise” question. I really struggle with that and recently I’ve been trying to just scroll past anyone doing TikToks on the best deals for Black Friday to avoid temptation
Bonus tip: measure your favorite pair of pants, sweater, etc and compare garment to garment (vs your body to the size chart) whenever possible. The same “waist” measurement of a pair of pants will squeeze or not squeeze depending on the rise. The “arms” will feel tight on a fitted shirt if the shoulder-to-shoulder is too big across because it will make the thing move funny on you and squeeze right at your bicep. So knowing the numbers (and fabric!) on your favorite garments can be incredibly clarifying. Most websites don’t show actual garment measurements BUT if you search for it used very often someone will have given garment measurements in their description. I also love searching for stuff used first- even if I need to buy it new for some reason- because seeing it in a pic with a normal camera, normal backdrop takes some of the “shine” off of it. Sometimes it’ll get you right through that Gollum feeling.
I have a friend who I go out with most weeks. I don’t drink but he does, so when I’m giving him a lift home sometimes I’ll ask him about his Christmas/birthday present because I know he’ll give me an honest answer and won’t remember having the conversation. That way he gets to be surprised and I get to buy him something I know he’ll love.
omg to be clear I didn't mean that I love stuff and donuts in addition to loving you as if you're all just on a list of things that I love. I mean that I, too, love stuff and donuts.
I usually have the opposite problem of actually spending on things I evidently need. So I try to use Black Friday for bigger purchases I've been putting off. This year it's durable black boots, a good shorter coat and a proper desk chair. I have definitely been tempted by more than that though, because once I break the accidental no-buy for things I need, I see more things I want. So yeah, I've been buying more lately, so thank you for the refresher!
Ive been using black friday in a productive way, If possible. Getting expensive yarn a Bit cheaper (i want to knit a Baby blanket for my Sisters Kid) and some le creuset kitchen stuff as a Xmas Gift. Two years ago i did the same with a good quality Office Chair, because god knows i need one for my Home Office... Unfortunately that also comes with a Lot more Spam trying to get me to buy more black friday stuff 🙃
I do this with clothes! I won't buy anything for months, if not years, and then I go on a binge and buy too much at once and end up disliking at least 20% of it. It's like the too-restrictive diet, eventually you're gonna lose will-power and over-indulge. I'm trying to get better at curating my wardrobe slowly, a couple pieces at a time.
i loved it so so much!! i’m gradually quitting fast fashion, and this is probably my first year when all those black friday deals and special offers don’t do anything for me. i’m now teaching myself to knit, and not spending anything, together with my rainbow socks that i’m knitting now, makes me warm and fuzzy inside, and it really is a nice feeling! thank you for this video essay!! ❤
Dear Leena, I almost cried when you said "I genuinely like things", I get joy from an object existing. Thank you so much. So do I! And in a world full of would-be minimalists...it felt so good to be seen.
Mateee I’m frightened to watch this! 🙈😂 Just used Black Friday to justify (to myself) buying a bunch of rugs 🙈 Right. Okay. Time to press play AGhHhhhHhhh!
This year was the only time I've gotten something from a black friday sale, and it was that I asked my mum for an annual subscription to BBC Maestro online courses whilst it was 40% off 😍 I'd also already really wanted it, but I was never going to be able to pay £110 so that's the only time sales make sense to me is as an opportunity to get something I already knew I wanted!
Last year I got half price lens coatings for my new glasses that I was already getting, so I was able to afford the nice ones that go shady in the sun and its been the best thing. It's definitely a fantastic time to go shopping for things that are on your list of needs and long-term wants
This weekend the city library of Gotherburg is instead hosting mending workshops which I'm so excited about. I have a silk button up that I don't know how to mend myself, and it has been in the back of my closet for so many months now that I'll definatly have this "new clothes" dopamine hit once I've mended it!
Buying my husband's Christmas and birthday presents (he's an early January baby) with Black Friday deals saved my unemployed grad student ass about €100. I've only ever bought things I truly loved/needed on Black Friday sales (always online), but then I'm very frugal and deal-oriented and if I buy something I use it to death.
Black Friday deals are often not deals at all. I wanted to buy a pair of headphones last year. In the weeks before Black Friday, the stores gradually added around €70 to the price. When Black Friday came, they lowered the price to what it had been a month prior. It's happening right now with other tech as well :(
Good reminders! I am shopping Black Friday deals like it’s my job this year because I’m in the end stages of purchasing a home, we move in next month, and we own nothing. We’ve been living in a furnished flat. We don’t own a mattress, we don’t own a sofa, we don’t own a TV or dishes or cutlery…the list goes on. We made a spreadsheet to list out what do we need immediately (things like “a bed” and “dishes to eat on”) and a Pinterest board to pin options and now I’m going through that board to see where deals can be had. Especially as we ARE trying to be conscious about what materials we buy and who we buy from, as our budget allows. For example I’m thrilled to support a small linen producer in Lithuania, we already have a couple items from them that we love and intended to buy more, and being able to do that this week at 20% off is a huge help! Marielle Elizabeth has a thoughtful summary of why she is promoting some ethical fashion this week, and you have some very good framing devices as well. I appreciate it!
Even before I became as environmentally conscious as I am now, I hated the idea of Black Friday. I'd see people being trampled on at shop openings on the news, and I'd feel so icky about it all. However, I go for things on Black Friday that I know I'll use (buying multiples of skin/body care I will use up) or things I know I've wanted for a long time (clothing item that fits into my wardrobe). One example is I was going to buy laundry powder and dish soap from a local, zero-waste store and just found out they're doing a Black Friday (actually, Small Business Saturday) sale, so I can get my locally- and sustainably-made, plastic-free household products and save $$. Love it!
Totally relate to the sense of urgency that can pressure you into making Black Friday purchases - but I get this mostly in relation to buying second hand shopping. If I’m browsing a regular online store I might keep the tab of something I like open for a while, come back to it a few times and finally make a decision a few weeks later (when often they’ve sold out in my size anyway and I move on). But when I see something I like second hand I feel real stress to scoop it up before someone else does! I almost exclusively buy second hand so this is something I’ve reeeally had to try hard to reign in!
I know this feeling and it has in resulted, sometimes, in me buying second hand things that I wasn't really that in love with just be cause I felt this internal rush to buy i before somebody else does 🙈I'm trying to be mindful of that now and give it intentionally more time, come back to the things I looked up a day or more later
I keep a need list and wish list and only buy those things. It helps with this. Although sometimes I make impulse buys if the thing is really cheap and useful. For example once I bought a cook book for 1€, which had multiple easy pasta recipes that I was interested in trying.
ugh yes! This is why I never go to a vintage/second hand shop without the idea of having some money to spend because it might be "gone forever" if you decide not to get it. Even then I do always try stuff on to make sure it's something I will wear a lot.... online second hand is more difficult I think, and I sometimes also just go into a hole of scrolling and favoriting a bunch of stuff :(. I do try to do the same thing I would with "new stuff", that is to put it aside for a while to see if I still want it.
Another factor on the ‘how could I modify this if my size/ taste changes’ I’ve been thinking about recently is what about if/ when my lifestyle changes. I’m in my final year of undergrad going into teacher training next year and trying really hard to make sure the clothes I’m buying will actually be things I will wear/ can wear on placements as a teacher! There’s no use buying tops only suitable for clubbing for example when I know I’m not going to be going out much beyond this year. It’s important to think about your personal style and how that can change but it’s so easy to forgot to consider how ‘appropriate’ clothes are to different situations. I want my whole wardrobe to reflect me rather than just a little section for wearing in my free time and a load of boring ‘teacher clothes’
GOD my eyes got so wide when you made the connection between creating endless shopping wishlists, dream wardrobes, etc. with lacking sufficient creative outlets in your life. That perfectly connects with how much dopamine I get from making lists and organizing those lists of sustainable clothes I can’t afford right now but would really like and how guilty/sad/frustrated I feel with how little art I’ve been making this year. Even if I’m usually not buying those things and even if they’re from sustainable brands and even if fashion is something I genuinely enjoy, there’s absolutely so much time and energy I’m spending on imagining what I’ll be able to buy in a month or two months or years from now that I could be spending actually making the shit I want to make. It’s much easier to endlessly scroll Reformation (fast fashion marketing model aside) than actually push through my creative blocks and perfectionism and actually finish all the half done paintings and prints on my desk 😅. Honestly, I’ve listened to so many tips on sustainable buying practices that I wasn’t expecting to be shocked by anything in this video but jesus…you got me again Leena. Thanks
Your "Donuts and minimalism" critique of minimalism and dieters and stuff like that--BANG ON., You just verbalized a thing. Someone needed to. Thankyou.
I’ve been doing the “this is beautiful but I don’t need to own it” a lot. We did buy some sonos speakers that we wanted for a while and now I can have music in the kitchen and living room which makes me so so happy 😊😊
I'm so glad I saw this today! I was just about to do the "let's buy the same gift for everyone so I can be done with buying gifts" thing. I get really wrapped up in the excitement of gift giving and I want to try to refocus on choosing thoughtful things that are handmade, thrifted, or purchased from local artists. They always end up being great gifts anyway! Thanks as always Leena.
I usually avoid Black Friday but this year I decided to buy a new battery, new SSD and an additional Ram for my laptop. In this way I can prolong the life of my laptop, which is already give years old and make it last longer. This should help me avoid buying a new device in one year or so (=less waste) and also help me save money.
My partner and I are discussing getting a bidet for ourselves for Xmas and honestly, it feels like an exercise in trying to think up a gift because “this the season.” All I want for Xmas are a few nice meals and visits with family and friends.
I second the request in the chat for a holiday gift guide video. I did collaborate with some of my family members a few years ago, and now we mostly just "gift" charitable donations for each other. We each have a cause near and dear to us, and if we're gathering in person I'll print the confirmation and stuff it in an envelope so that they have something to open. Plus my company matches donations (if you work for a big corporation check if yours does too!) so we get double the effect for each dollar donated. But outside that group it can be difficult to come up with ideas, especially for people you aren't actually that close too (in laws), or kids. And my SO wants "real gift wrap" so I need to find something that balances less waste, affordable, and meets his aesthetic or the plastic stuff will get snuck in to the house.
Yesterday's video by Leena's author friend Jen Campbell is her latest book haul, AND she invites viewers to leave a comment on that video asking for suggestions for books for a particular reader in your life. She's going to review the comments and post a gift guide in a few weeks. (Leena, I would love to see a collab video by you and Jen in the not too distant future - maybe with you two on vid chat, since she's still in London. 🥰)
This video is exactly what I needed! I have found myself consuming so much more now that I can drive and have a job. A few years ago I really didn't spend money on anything and I was very happy with that but now I live by myself and so much more freedom with what I consume. I feel like i've gone in the opposite direction. Granted, I do actually need most of the stuff I am getting. I guess I'm just struggling with finding the balance of what I want and actually need. Also definitely want to work on just appreciating something exists without taking it home!
I SO love the perspective you present with this - I feel so seen and not like a bad person for actually liking stuff! While it's all very easy to say just plainly "you don't need more stuff in your life," that's not extremely useful for those of us who do enjoy t h i n g s and appreciating the actual beauty and joy and fun of life and the stuff in it! I love that I don't feel guilted by this video and therefore are much more receptive to the message which is incredibly valuable - and omg "do you want to own it or do you just like that it exists?" holy shit lmao. I now have that perspective in my lexicon of understanding how my brain can work, thank you for that as well. like the "I just wanna shrink it and put it in my pocket so I can just look at it sometimes" but you don't actually Have to have the t h i n g to do that! Idk I just love this video.
Black Friday made sense in the United States before online shopping. It is the day after Thanksgiving, so lots of people with office jobs (obviously not those in retail or service) would have a day off work to go physically out shopping and get good deals on Christmas presents. Now that it's inexplicably a week long, and everyone can shop online whenever they want anyway, it's just shops hiking up their prices for months BEFORE November and selling things for a reasonable amount in what would otherwise be a random week. It doesn't work anymore for sustainability and over-consumerism reasons either...but it genuinely just doesn't make sense anymore at all.
Something that helps me to give thoughtful gifts is to buy stuff for the person whenever I'm in a shop and think "oh, X would love this!" That way I don't have the ill-fated Christmas shopping trip where I throw money at ticking stuff off my list. Plus it means that I can get stuff with patterns and colours that are out of season and the person would prefer :)
I love gift giving because I love making others happy. But as much as I don't want to receive anything I don't really need, I don't want to give anything the recipient might not be fully on board with. So by now my family & friends know that, unless they *tell me* what they want, they're not getting christmas/birthday gifts. I've also told them "if I don't ask for anything, please don't give me anything". Of course there are people who really frown at the idea of not giving christmas gifts (like my mom, or grandma), those I tell to give me something that will be used up, like something to eat, fancy soap, a nice candle, gift cards for my favorite yarn store. They can scratch their gift-giving itch and I'm not burdened with something that - in my eyes - just takes up space. This system often leads to more interesting gifts than just buying a random thing. One year my brother asked for a dish for his birthday party as a gift, we had a great buffet because everyone brought something different. Another year there were bad harvests in Turkey so hazelnuts were either expensive or sold out, and I had complained that I couldn't find any for baking. So for christmas my mom got me a bunch of baking ingredients - including hazelnuts! These are the memorable things.
The point from Hannah's video on the desire to own things coming from a love of beauty and beautiful things was such a revelation for me and it has taken the guilt out of the way I consume which, in turn has made it easier for me to control my consumption; It's taken away the feeling like I was cheating on diet whenever I saw something that was pretty that I wanted (even if I didn't buy it!) Acknowledging that things are pretty and you're glad they exist in the world but they don't have to exist in your home and giving time to your existing creativity has been magic! Something that Hannah also suggested in her video is playing dress ups in your wardrobe which has been SO MUCH FUN, basically go watch Hannah's video also.
I have a list of kids gifts I will be buying before Xmas no matter what, so I’m price watching in hopes I get a few quid off on Black Friday. I find the shops have better deals before Black Friday tbh. I lost my job recently so I’m counting the pennies.
I came back here several days after watching this video to say this: I have been repeating the mantra “do I really want this, or do I just like that it exists” so often. What a revelation! You have shifted my mindset in such a useful way. Thank you!😘
two things that always keep my head on my shoulders in terms of spending is, 1.) where is it going to fit/go in my space and how can I get the most use out of it. and 2.) always look at the shipping price for online purchases... 9 times out of 10 I will not make a purchase because the shipping cost deters me and the few times i have gone ahead with the purchase is if the thing is something i genuinely have time, space and passion for.
I got into the habit of keeping a list throughout the year, so when friends/family mention something they need or want, I just write it on the list and slowly buy them throughout the year. It spreads the cost over the year and means I have more control over when I go for deals of specific items. I also like putting things in my Amazon basket, letting them sit there and checking back to see if any discount has been applied. It also means that when I do actually go to buy something from Amazon, I have to remove everything from my basket (so as to not purchase it) and manually have to add the wanted items back in. Often a few get chipped off the list as my desire for it has wavered by that point!
This really resonated for me... The sentimental purchases are the ones that I struggle with most. Do these vintage Christmas ornaments remind me of some of the happiest times of my childhood? Yes. Do I need to buy every vintage Christmas ornament I come across at thrift stores? No but I do want to buy them so much. Imagining the happy person that will also love them if I don't buy them is such a helpful tip. Also being able to appreciate that something exists without owning it might be life changing for me. Thank you!
I try to avoid Black Friday as I've never really wanted to like idk get crushed at Best Buy but what gets me is CYBER MONDAY!!! Oh boy I even was thinking like "oh yeah I've been wanting a game like this" or "yeah I like these kinds of games maybe I'll get one" but like?? I don't need them and I don't want them and I didn't want them until I realized cyber Monday was coming! I might only try to get a party game because I don't have a lot of multiplayer games but I'm going to keep these questions in mind when it comes to literally any other game
I'm trying to ramp up to a conversation with my mum about her gift giving. She genuinely shows love through buying people lots of gifts and I get where she is coming from, but every year we get piles of things we don't want or need and it's deeply stressful. I don't want to upset her but something needs to change. I've also recently been trying to get back to a feeling I had when I was little, when I would be so excited to save up my allowance for weeks to buy one thing I really wanted. I'm trying to do that with my adult money now, and enjoy the process of saving for one good quality item that will hopefully last me for many many years. I just bought a Le Creuset Dutch Oven, and that's something our family (or others) will be able to cook in for generations, and it's both very useful and very pretty.
I love my stuff too! It makes me not want to get rid of things, and so when my house is full I don't want anything more. Christmas gifts that people can use up, or eat, are perfect for people that don't need stuff.
I watched this video, kept thinking about "do I want to own it or do I like that it exists?" And am now back to tell you Leena, you rocked my world. Turns out, with many things I just like that they exist and that I don't necessarily need to buy it to have it in the world.
Man, I was really struggling with overspending a year ago and now I feel like I'm doing a lottttt better since a couple of months. Part of it was because I started actually selling some old things I couldn't wear or didn't wear anymore, and finding out how much less it was worth in comparison to what I spend on it myself: very petty!!! but that really made me actually appreciate the value of clothes more (in that the stuff I love is worth a lot to me, but the stuff I'm not even sure really suits me is not, even though its pretty). Also; because I've been really looking more through my own clothes and figuring out what I end up wearing a lot, I feel a lot more like I'm wearing my clothes instead of the clothes wearing me. I feel "cooler" because I found out I do have clothes that really suit my personality and life (also all of the different styles you like that come together in what you have and can combine). I think that's something I struggled with a lot, because I was constantly swayed by different influencers I liked with new styles and "trends" coming in. And thinking about it, I really admire people who stick to what they like, and you can tell through their consistent style. I really love Zoe Kravitz' style for example, its very her, and also incorporates different vibes anyway. Also, when I want something I will put it on the backburner to see if I still like it months later. A plus is that usually if you stick it out, it'll go on sale and you can get the thing you still like after 4 months or so. Then there's the "if I do get the buying jitters I might get a small nailpolish or a hairclip instead" which is less damaging to me than the amount of clothes there are in the world. But I'm not perfect, I became slightly obsessed with Marlowe Granados' style recently (her book is really good, and she has this AMAZING feminine and pastel colors style, which I love but don't wear a lot because it makes me feel a bit vulnerable where I live) and got a second hand pucci top
I never buy anything for Black Friday. I don’t get fast fashion, nor makeup or so. But. I actually got my mother a kitchen aid on discount. Black Friday in the Netherlands lasts a couple of days, so I had time to think it over. I think she’ll have it for life, and it’s worth every penny if she doesn’t have to tire her hands while making dough or such.
i feel like black friday sales only make sense if you need/want something and make a plan to buy it once it's on sale, doing all the prep of choosing the best fit for your requirements in advance. otherwise it's very hard to make good choices just scrolling through sites designed to make you buy stuff you don't need (at least for me). i'm getting refills of some of my more expensive skincare items, that's it :)
I always come out of your videos feeing like I understand myself a little better - I’ve been trying to answer the question “why do own a wardrobe full of clothes that I don’t want to wear?” And this video has made it alarmingly clear that it’s because I’ve been styling myself based around a desire to be taken seriously (and thus benching the fun, colourful, slightly zainy clothes I lust after, and buying “sensible” things) I feel so much better since acknowledging that my taste isn’t serious, I don’t have a job that requires me to dress sensibly and so my wardrobe can be whatever I want
I've never really liked the whole Black Friday phenomenon (for many reasons, including having worked food service shifts that day - people are so rude when they're hyper focused on buying stuff!). However I have used the sales to get things I truly needed and wanted (last year was a skillshare subscription and an indoor gardening system). So this year I will buy reusable ear plugs (need them for work) and new underwear (most of mine are completely worn out). My general question for sales is "would I still buy _____ if it was full price?" Chances are if the answer is no then I dont really need/want it.
I totally get the leaving the things for other people and imagining their joy. I do the same with pennies... stay with me here... so you know the expression, see a penny pick it up and all day you'll have good luck... well... I like to see the penny, think "ooh luck!" but I then leave the penny for the next person and just think, I've had some luck, they can have the penny and some luck too. I do appreciate that's bonkers. But hey, it makes me happy.
I'm going to write these down and put them on my fridge. Great advice, thank you! The question I usually consider before buying any clothing is "do I love this right now because it's trending, or will I love this forever?" I try to only buy things that will stand the test of time and if it's because of a trend, I don't buy it.
Your intro made me laugh out loud! 😂 I totally get the need for nice stuff! Several years ago, my annoyingly practical mother decided that we all had enough stuff and that Christmas would be about helping others. Therefore , since then, no more gifts, we just donate to our favourite charity. Feels so much better and helps me avoid the temptation of Black Friday. Thanks so much for this valuable guide. Love what you do.❤!
Ok I'm gonna write so much, I'm sorry. Hoarder in remission here. Also had seasons of pretty dysfunctional shopaholism. Like to believe I have both of those semi-under control at the moment but the diseases are always ...lurking. First off, I very much laughed loudly at the description of minimalists not actually liking stuff because it's so true. And I do like stuff. And also donuts. So so so true. Secondly, I have to scratch the same itch you described about going into shops and like putting things together in my mind and fulfilling that creative need. If I'm feeling strong (Like I won't need to buy something) I will go to stores just to look at stuff to inspire me. And like you said, it'll evoke a feeling and an image, and then I can sort through in my mind the insane collection of things I already have and make something similar, be it an outfit or art piece or vignette. It works very well if you were already a hoarder who could still access some of your belongings. While I've tried decluttering, it's been a slow process so I didn't have any panic attacks and I can stop myself from buying more if I can remember what I have and use it properly. As for the actual topic at hand, Black Friday. It used to be a dangerous time for my shopping season. Thankfully, I don't have a ton of money right now, so I know I can't do that. Still, I make a list before Black Friday of the things I will search for deals on and those are the only things. So my favorite underwear I buy every year on black friday, this year I need to stock up on my favorite daily chapstick. Things like that. Everyday use items that I can get a slightly better price on and only buy once a year. Then I usually have one or two things from a brand I've been pining after for a few years but never felt it was the right time to purchase, whether for the price or if I didn't think I would really use the item enough to justify it. But I'll look for black friday deals on those few items to see if now is the time to let myself try those 1 or 2 things. AND I usually have one cleaning tool I'm pining after- the good vacuum. The steam cleaner. The carpet shampooer. I usually have a cleaning item I want I'll use this time to get discounts. However this year I don't think I need any more cleaning tools. I'd like a portable upholstery extractor for the cars, but I don't need it and due to other expenses, now is not the time for that. I also have some services I'd like done but have pushed to the backburner. Some area rugs that are in storage I need to get professionally cleaned...but just hasn't been top of the money priority list. Or canvases I need to get stretched at a framing place. But services don't usually have Black Friday deals, so those probably still won't get done for a while. So basically I survive Black Friday the same way I try to survive the rest of the year. Knowing I don't have much money, knowing I already have a TON of stuff and can probably do what I need and want with most of that, and knowing there is ALAYS list of money requirements and priorities, and a couple of discounts don't mean more NON-essentials get to skip the line ahead of essentials (like saving for a house repair or something.) ANNND my favorite thing that I forget to remember. The second I feel like I have extra money and buy something I didn't need. And I mean the SECOND. Something big will happen that I'll need money for. Vet expense for the pets. Car will need an expensive repair. Something. It happens every time. I just bought a hoodie, the car started leaking oil. Like it's just the way life works. Anyway, love the video, sorry for the rant. Dunno why I needed to rant. Oh yeah because I'm avoiding cleaning my house for thanksgiving dinner. Ok.
I really appreciate your comment on using shopping/wishlisting in place of other forms of creative expression. For practical and mental reasons, I'm not always able to pursue painting, sewing, music etc. This is a great reminder to try to channel creativity away from consumerism 🙂
Totally on board with you, Leena. Black Friday coming around made me realize that there are certain basic necessities I've been putting off buying that would make my life a lot easier, like hangers because I have more clothing than hangers, or bookshelves. Funny thing is I ended up feeling sick, so I didn't have the energy to buy anything at all! But I do to want to make more of an effort to buy the things I need, or find them second hand if I can, and then impulse by less of random items from thriftstores that I can live without.
I caught myself the other day. I wanted to drop $165 on a limited edition color way of a kettle. It was beautiful and would match my kitchen color scheme. It seemed to have high reviews, and I almost clicked buy, but I stopped to actually read the reviews and found out many people rated it highly because it was pretty, but admitted it wasn’t functionally ideal. The complaints all came after they all owned it for only a couple months and said it actually stopped working well after a while. While I was sad to make the smart choice, I’m also glad I didn’t impulse buy something because it was limited edition, under the guise that it was a practical item of seemingly higher quality that would last me forever.
I'm so proud of myself because there are things that I know (almost for certain) I will buy at some point, that are on offer right now- but I am making a point of not buying them yet because a) times change and I might not buy them, b) I'm not ready for them to be in my life just yet (work clothes for a job that I want and am training for but do not yet have and therefore have little purpose for) c) Black Friday is at the end of the month and just before payday and quite simply there is too much month at the end of my money for this.
More videos of you I watch, the more I believe your channel maybe be my favourite youtube channel. Each of your videos are so brilliant, interesting, comforting, essential and entertaining. I'm so glad that your content, your creativity and your words can make a way into the world. So thank you so very much
I have been caught in the trap by black Friday in the past but this year I promised myself that the only thing I will buy just because of the sale is noise cancelling headphones, I just moved to London and have been in need of them for a little while now so buying them on black Friday feels like a win-win as I know they'll be cheaper than they are usually
For me Black Friday is for a few well researched practical bits and bobs I have just about managed without but not really and have struggled to buy second hand and not having to pay full price for them - like a new vacuum cleaner 😅
I really needed this reminder! Recently moving countries, being stressed with my masters, and wanting to make my apartment as comfortable as possible, I find myself scrolling shopping sites more and more, which is unusual for me. Your advice - especially the point about just liking that something exists! (me every single day finding something I appreciate) - was necessary. Thank you Leena! 😊
I was considering purchasing something non-fast fashion to wear to a friend's wedding this Black Friday, but now you've got me thinking of renting something instead...thanks as always for the food for thought!
Every year my self and my close friends sit in a circle (normally in October/November) and we tell each other what we would like. We tell each the shows/movies/books/records we really want. It's means everyone get something they want.
my god, so many good points. I forgot to think of the laborers. if I really needed it, I wouldn't have been waiting for the sale. my imaginary savings comes at their tangible physical expense. EDIT for a future video idea: are there ways to ethically buy small electronics (like speakers and computer accessories and such)? thank you, love you
Last year I bought something specifically on black friday, because I had meant to buy the thing for a while now, but it was quite pricey (for me, not in general), so I waited for the sale.
The point you made about how we want gift giving to be over and give into the selfish impulse to just buy it really resonated with me. This Christmas I have started buying presents a little earlier at local craft/ flea markets and am thus seeing the whole process as a lot less overwhelming, urgent and stressful!
This is really helpful thank you. I was just finishing my bottle of Olaplex when I realised it was Black Friday so went to get some, but then I saw a couple other things on the site "since I'm here" and added them to my cart even though I fully don't need them. I had to break for dinner (and TH-cam) before finalising my cart so thank you for saving me 😅 I've definitely become more wary of buying stuff in general because of your videos so thank you for all your work on making this approachable and giving us nuanced and relatable ways of dealing with difficult topics 💜
The one thing I'm planning to buy and definitely need is a new pair of glasses, because mine have been broken since June or July and I desperately need the headaches to stop.😪
I love the intro/framing of this video. Resonates with my relationship to physical items. This video is an emotionally engaged take on consumption and I’m LIVING for this narrative
The idea that you make somebody else happy by not buying it because they will love it and buy it is mind-blowing. I will definitely remember that. Kathy B I need new pants too.
I'm at an age where I've realised that in regards to buying/making things that are very similar to things I already have and like a lot (particularly if I wear it and feel great in for long hours), that I should get them. It isn't a waste to get more of what I like, it just means that I'm going to have more outfits that I feel good in. I've realised that I like layering certain shaped dresses and playsuits over my tshirts and sweaters and I should have more dresses that I can use that way rather than others that are different and don't let me wear it with the other layers that make me feel comfortable and safe. Though it is still important for me to make sure that theyre different enough in colour, material or texture so I'm not just getting something that won't get used as much as the one I already have
I just moved into my very first own apartment (after years of living with flatmates / partners) and I got quite a few things that had been on my to-buy list anyway and I waited to buy them until they came on sale, which is jelling or at least feels like it’s helping quite a bit
I have a little thought that has lived in my brain since I did a hyperfocused deep dive into fashion history and the fast fashion industry one term way back in school: who’s not getting paid for this? This phrase alone has prevented me from buying so so many truly unwanted/unneeded items. I also think about that argument for fast fashion many people make that we need cheap options for poor people. As a poor person, I would prefer a universal liveable wage that includes being able to buy the things I need for a fair price. I’ve lived without such income for my whole adult life, and I’ve managed to keep fast fashion shopping to a minimum. I love second hand clothes, mending, altering, or making for myself. Also, I live as a minimalist but am attracted to maximalist styles. It’s possible to find a balance, I promise! And Leena was absolutely right, feed your creative itch and enjoy all the art in the world, but leave it out in the world more often than bringing something in, it is just as satisfying as attempting to own all the pretty and colourful things. And if you do really want to bring something wonderful and creative home, it’s a thoughtful purchase from a small artist who is being paid and is so thrilled to sell to you, or you giving something new life. Leena, amazing and insightful video as usual!
I've been watching your content for years and I think this is one of, if not my favourite videos of yours!! super insightful, informative, witty and so godamn useful! Gahh thank you for blessing us with these vids Leena
I never thought about buying things on sale as sending a message to companies that I would be happy putting less money towards something. I wonder how much this does affect pricing. As someone who buys a mixture of ethical/secondhand and fast fashion, I framed it as well, if I get it on sale and pay less for it then the company is making less of a profit.
All fantastic questions! Another one that’s very helpful to me when I’m tempted by impulse purchases is “what else could I use this money for?” Immediately puts unplanned purchases into perspective when I think of them in terms of how many many groceries they could buy, or how many of the things I actually need I could cross off my list for the same amount. Sometimes “the thing” I’m considering still ends up being worth it, but either way, this question has helped a lot in evaluating my priorities.
I'm waiting for Black Friday to buy some sims expansions. I was looking at them last month and decided to wait for the sale. If forget, it means it's no longer relevant, if I buy them, it's probably the best price for the next few years.
I know this isn't strictly Black Friday related but on the subject of gifts one thing to ask is do I have some kind of skill or just time I can offer instead of a material thing? How about offering to arrange a time to babysit for your friends so they can have a date night or even just a nap? Can you sew, see if a friend needs a favourite garment mended, hemmed or taken in? Do you know how to sharpen knives offer to sharpen dull knives so someone can have a more enjoyable cooking experience. How about just an hour or two of time to help with a task they just need some help and or moral support to get completed.Has someone you know been talking about doing something forever, a friend of mine had a china cabinet that the glass got broken out of she kept talking about replacing the glass but just never got around to it so I got the glass cut and put it in for her she was freaking thrilled. Another friend noticed I'd made new numbers for my house she mentioned she liked them and needed new numbers for her own house as hers where very small and hard to see from the road, so I made her numbers. We all have little tasks we want to get done but for one reason or another never seem to get around to wouldn't it make you feel so loved and heard if you mentioned said task to a friend and for Christmas they did the task for you!
Hair looks great Leena! I never remember to buy anything during the Black Friday sales. It wasn't a thing for most of my life and I never got into the swing of it. I used to feel annoyed about the thing I bought being in the sale the following week but now I have made peace with it and would really rather not take part in Black Friday. The one American tradition I can get behind at this time of year is pumpkin pie. I make one every year and they taste great
I've always been fascinated by black Friday. I look at ads for big items and the deals never seem good enough for the stress and hassle. I've never deemed worth participating in (at least on a big scale), but maybe my interest is partly due to wishing I did want to participate. Thank you for this helpful video.
You’re right that this is often too much to have in one’s head. If only we could automate that reminder. There are so many Chrome extensions to help you get a discount based on what site you’re on but I haven’t heard of any that give you a helpful checklist before you click purchase. If it doesn’t exist, I’ll put it in my coding project ideas. I don’t know the first thing about making chrome extensions but this seems like one of the more helpful ideas I’ve had. Edit- from like 30 secs of searching ‘anti consumerism’ and ‘shopping addiction’ chrome extensions, there are a few with various ways of reducing the ability to shop or reframing what the price means, etc.
The sizing thing simply does not apply when you are satisfied with your wardrobe as is, which has been my experience from pre-pandemic to now. The only things I feel could add to my wardrobe is a solid vest or two, or snowpants (like you wear when skiing), both of which would require a trip to specific stores I'm unwilling to do around this time of year as I'm repulsed by crowds. I could ask for a gift card to a ski shop but that's the closest I'll get to going to a mall before new years. Most of my christmas list include physical video games, CDs and DVDs, which I understand as physical medium will be around long after I die, but I can pass them among friends and family, where I can't (legally) with digital versions, and if I was to lose power for days I can still listen to the CDs on an old school player with batteries, or play the games on portable systems that don't require external power. The DVDs are partly to share shows with my dad who has no internet, and partly to support creators in case the network pulls them from streaming (like you may have heard about the mess from HBO max's merger).
You definitely just changed my life with the question "Do you want to own it, or do you just like that it exists?" I immediately thought of several purchases I've made simply because I was excited by the concept of such a thing and, as you said, wanted to express appreciation for that thing in some tangible way. Oof.
This totally hit for me, too! As ever, Leena says what my brain needs to conceptualize, haha. I *love* certain things but absolutely don't want to maintain them or make a permanent space for them in my life or home.
Yes! I've brought so many books because I never asked myself this question.
I celebrate Buy Nothing Day and since I work at a Library we put up a display on crafting, mending, home repair and gardening. 'Do, or do not Do, there is No Buy' is the theme this year. 😆
Before I even watch this video I just HAVE to say that I'm here for every single one of your casual cardigan-off-the-shoulder looks to show off that incredible leopard tattoo. It just looks SO. GOOD.
I didn't even realize it was to show off the tattoo but you are so right! It does look so good
If you reeeeeeeally don't want to "spoil the fun" by asking people what they want, ask for a list. Me and my family we do that for years now. We give eachother a list of things we like/need and people can choose what they want to buy.
Great point. Lists are so underrated!
I made a list for myself, but my family members are terrible at making lists for themselves. I've started using the notes feature under their contact in my iPhone whenever they mention they want something. I've gotten everyone 1 things that I've at least heard them say that they will use and my Christmas shopping is nearly done!
I've done this for almost 20 years, since I got into a hobby that had particular requirements. A couple years of getting nice gifts that my family thought were useful for my hobby, but which really weren't, led me to giving them lists with links/colours/sizes, etc with the proviso that these were just suggestions and they could buy a much/little as they wanted, or nothing from it at all. It's worked out really well. They have easy suggestions, and my budget stretches farther, by not having to buy this stuff I really want, but still getting it!
@@BethanyLorene I do this too, throughout the entire year! January 1st, they mention how much they'd like a popcorn maker, slippers, or a foot bath? Great, adding it to the list for next Christmas.
Yup! My family have done this our whole lives and it is baffling to me that it is unpopular. I try to make long lists, so I genuinely never have any idea what I'm getting.
I think it’s sad that “Black Friday” from the US is reaching so many countries. I didn’t realize how powerful this idea of consumerism is until I studied abroad and traveled in Europe during my university years 😬
I feel like minimalism is like the equivalent of an ED of material possessions. So many minimalists I have seen on social media obsess about the amount of things they have, they constantly purge and try to live on less and less, and seem to hyperfocus on the things they do/not have. I think striking a balance is key. Extremes of either excess or deprivation is not healthy.
I think the difference is minimalism can be healthy if that's what ypu really want, but if it's not then you're never going to be happy with it. (Whereas an eating disorder is never healthy)
It definitely was connected to my ED. When I was really poorly with my ED, I found buying anything difficult. All my clothes had holes in and only now I'm doing better I can allow myself to buy new things.
I hate Christmas gifts it’s makes me sound evil but people always give me things I don’t want or need, I’m an adult with my own money I’d rather just buy what I need when I need it and you save your money to buy what you need when you need it. I think Christmas gifts should be for children
I organised with my parents that we don't give each other Christmas presents. They usually ask what I want and then I can't come up with something and it's stressful for everyone, so we just decided not to do it! My wider family does consumable gifts so there's hopefully no waste!
I decided to take myself to the theater on black Friday instead. Supporting the local arts and keeping me out of stores and the pre holiday craziness
"something else might be missing" THIS happened just two weeks ago - I was looking at my closet thinking 'oh i have no clothes i need to buy new clothes' but figured out NO I was literally just missing one of my shirts! my brain was looking in my closet FOR THAT SHIRT and it took me a long time to realize it was missing and when I found it the feeling of having to buy new clothes vanished!
I’m realizing that this applies to my hand-wash items too! I wear them a few times, but then relegate them to the wash pile, and it takes me ages to get around to washing, and then I feel like I have no clothes, but it’s really a matter of pausing to care for what I have instead of hunting for more!
The second point!!! I genuinely feel so much sadness when I see hobby crafters share something they made for themselves or for a loved one online and the *dominant* response they get is "How do I buy it?" We can appreciate that things exist in the world without needing to buy them or turning the people who made them into capitalists with another side hustle instead of a fun hobby they do for personal fulfillment. And I think that point applies to full-time professional artists as well who price their work at luxury prices and get pushback for not being "accessible." Owning art is a luxury, and the people who make it should be able to support good, full lives with their income. You can still appreciate and support them without demanding their labor come at a low cost to you.
I have mixed feelings about the idea that owning art is a luxury, because i feel that its so central to the human experience. But i do wish more people would make their own art! I think that would also help people understand better why artists charge what they do for their finished works
I so resonate with the “it’s not savings if you wouldn’t have purchased it otherwise” question. I really struggle with that and recently I’ve been trying to just scroll past anyone doing TikToks on the best deals for Black Friday to avoid temptation
Bonus tip: measure your favorite pair of pants, sweater, etc and compare garment to garment (vs your body to the size chart) whenever possible. The same “waist” measurement of a pair of pants will squeeze or not squeeze depending on the rise. The “arms” will feel tight on a fitted shirt if the shoulder-to-shoulder is too big across because it will make the thing move funny on you and squeeze right at your bicep. So knowing the numbers (and fabric!) on your favorite garments can be incredibly clarifying.
Most websites don’t show actual garment measurements BUT if you search for it used very often someone will have given garment measurements in their description.
I also love searching for stuff used first- even if I need to buy it new for some reason- because seeing it in a pic with a normal camera, normal backdrop takes some of the “shine” off of it. Sometimes it’ll get you right through that Gollum feeling.
I have a friend who I go out with most weeks. I don’t drink but he does, so when I’m giving him a lift home sometimes I’ll ask him about his Christmas/birthday present because I know he’ll give me an honest answer and won’t remember having the conversation. That way he gets to be surprised and I get to buy him something I know he’ll love.
Leena I love you so much. And I also love stuff and donuts
omg to be clear I didn't mean that I love stuff and donuts in addition to loving you as if you're all just on a list of things that I love. I mean that I, too, love stuff and donuts.
I usually have the opposite problem of actually spending on things I evidently need. So I try to use Black Friday for bigger purchases I've been putting off. This year it's durable black boots, a good shorter coat and a proper desk chair. I have definitely been tempted by more than that though, because once I break the accidental no-buy for things I need, I see more things I want. So yeah, I've been buying more lately, so thank you for the refresher!
Ive been using black friday in a productive way, If possible.
Getting expensive yarn a Bit cheaper (i want to knit a Baby blanket for my Sisters Kid) and some le creuset kitchen stuff as a Xmas Gift. Two years ago i did the same with a good quality Office Chair, because god knows i need one for my Home Office...
Unfortunately that also comes with a Lot more Spam trying to get me to buy more black friday stuff 🙃
I do this with clothes! I won't buy anything for months, if not years, and then I go on a binge and buy too much at once and end up disliking at least 20% of it. It's like the too-restrictive diet, eventually you're gonna lose will-power and over-indulge. I'm trying to get better at curating my wardrobe slowly, a couple pieces at a time.
I'm the exact same!
i loved it so so much!!
i’m gradually quitting fast fashion, and this is probably my first year when all those black friday deals and special offers don’t do anything for me.
i’m now teaching myself to knit, and not spending anything, together with my rainbow socks that i’m knitting now, makes me warm and fuzzy inside, and it really is a nice feeling!
thank you for this video essay!! ❤
I love the “do I want to own it or do I just like that it exists” framework!!
Dear Leena,
I almost cried when you said "I genuinely like things", I get joy from an object existing. Thank you so much. So do I! And in a world full of would-be minimalists...it felt so good to be seen.
Mateee I’m frightened to watch this! 🙈😂 Just used Black Friday to justify (to myself) buying a bunch of rugs 🙈 Right. Okay. Time to press play AGhHhhhHhhh!
Haha a good rug never hurt anyone, you're renovating a house for goodness sake, let the people have rugs!
This year was the only time I've gotten something from a black friday sale, and it was that I asked my mum for an annual subscription to BBC Maestro online courses whilst it was 40% off 😍 I'd also already really wanted it, but I was never going to be able to pay £110 so that's the only time sales make sense to me is as an opportunity to get something I already knew I wanted!
Last year I got half price lens coatings for my new glasses that I was already getting, so I was able to afford the nice ones that go shady in the sun and its been the best thing. It's definitely a fantastic time to go shopping for things that are on your list of needs and long-term wants
This is probably going to be another one of your videos that I'll be watching almost weekly to feel more grounded. Thank you leena!
you and me both, friend
This weekend the city library of Gotherburg is instead hosting mending workshops which I'm so excited about. I have a silk button up that I don't know how to mend myself, and it has been in the back of my closet for so many months now that I'll definatly have this "new clothes" dopamine hit once I've mended it!
Buying my husband's Christmas and birthday presents (he's an early January baby) with Black Friday deals saved my unemployed grad student ass about €100. I've only ever bought things I truly loved/needed on Black Friday sales (always online), but then I'm very frugal and deal-oriented and if I buy something I use it to death.
Black Friday deals are often not deals at all. I wanted to buy a pair of headphones last year. In the weeks before Black Friday, the stores gradually added around €70 to the price. When Black Friday came, they lowered the price to what it had been a month prior. It's happening right now with other tech as well :(
Good reminders! I am shopping Black Friday deals like it’s my job this year because I’m in the end stages of purchasing a home, we move in next month, and we own nothing. We’ve been living in a furnished flat. We don’t own a mattress, we don’t own a sofa, we don’t own a TV or dishes or cutlery…the list goes on. We made a spreadsheet to list out what do we need immediately (things like “a bed” and “dishes to eat on”) and a Pinterest board to pin options and now I’m going through that board to see where deals can be had. Especially as we ARE trying to be conscious about what materials we buy and who we buy from, as our budget allows. For example I’m thrilled to support a small linen producer in Lithuania, we already have a couple items from them that we love and intended to buy more, and being able to do that this week at 20% off is a huge help! Marielle Elizabeth has a thoughtful summary of why she is promoting some ethical fashion this week, and you have some very good framing devices as well. I appreciate it!
Even before I became as environmentally conscious as I am now, I hated the idea of Black Friday. I'd see people being trampled on at shop openings on the news, and I'd feel so icky about it all. However, I go for things on Black Friday that I know I'll use (buying multiples of skin/body care I will use up) or things I know I've wanted for a long time (clothing item that fits into my wardrobe). One example is I was going to buy laundry powder and dish soap from a local, zero-waste store and just found out they're doing a Black Friday (actually, Small Business Saturday) sale, so I can get my locally- and sustainably-made, plastic-free household products and save $$. Love it!
The thing that you said about using shopping to make up for not being creative enough in your life HIT. Ty always for your wisdom!!!
Totally relate to the sense of urgency that can pressure you into making Black Friday purchases - but I get this mostly in relation to buying second hand shopping. If I’m browsing a regular online store I might keep the tab of something I like open for a while, come back to it a few times and finally make a decision a few weeks later (when often they’ve sold out in my size anyway and I move on). But when I see something I like second hand I feel real stress to scoop it up before someone else does! I almost exclusively buy second hand so this is something I’ve reeeally had to try hard to reign in!
I feel this constantly. You're not alone!
I know this feeling and it has in resulted, sometimes, in me buying second hand things that I wasn't really that in love with just be cause I felt this internal rush to buy i before somebody else does 🙈I'm trying to be mindful of that now and give it intentionally more time, come back to the things I looked up a day or more later
I keep a need list and wish list and only buy those things. It helps with this. Although sometimes I make impulse buys if the thing is really cheap and useful. For example once I bought a cook book for 1€, which had multiple easy pasta recipes that I was interested in trying.
ugh yes! This is why I never go to a vintage/second hand shop without the idea of having some money to spend because it might be "gone forever" if you decide not to get it. Even then I do always try stuff on to make sure it's something I will wear a lot.... online second hand is more difficult I think, and I sometimes also just go into a hole of scrolling and favoriting a bunch of stuff :(. I do try to do the same thing I would with "new stuff", that is to put it aside for a while to see if I still want it.
Another factor on the ‘how could I modify this if my size/ taste changes’ I’ve been thinking about recently is what about if/ when my lifestyle changes. I’m in my final year of undergrad going into teacher training next year and trying really hard to make sure the clothes I’m buying will actually be things I will wear/ can wear on placements as a teacher! There’s no use buying tops only suitable for clubbing for example when I know I’m not going to be going out much beyond this year. It’s important to think about your personal style and how that can change but it’s so easy to forgot to consider how ‘appropriate’ clothes are to different situations.
I want my whole wardrobe to reflect me rather than just a little section for wearing in my free time and a load of boring ‘teacher clothes’
GOD my eyes got so wide when you made the connection between creating endless shopping wishlists, dream wardrobes, etc. with lacking sufficient creative outlets in your life. That perfectly connects with how much dopamine I get from making lists and organizing those lists of sustainable clothes I can’t afford right now but would really like and how guilty/sad/frustrated I feel with how little art I’ve been making this year. Even if I’m usually not buying those things and even if they’re from sustainable brands and even if fashion is something I genuinely enjoy, there’s absolutely so much time and energy I’m spending on imagining what I’ll be able to buy in a month or two months or years from now that I could be spending actually making the shit I want to make. It’s much easier to endlessly scroll Reformation (fast fashion marketing model aside) than actually push through my creative blocks and perfectionism and actually finish all the half done paintings and prints on my desk 😅. Honestly, I’ve listened to so many tips on sustainable buying practices that I wasn’t expecting to be shocked by anything in this video but jesus…you got me again Leena. Thanks
Your "Donuts and minimalism" critique of minimalism and dieters and stuff like that--BANG ON., You just verbalized a thing. Someone needed to. Thankyou.
I’ve been doing the “this is beautiful but I don’t need to own it” a lot. We did buy some sonos speakers that we wanted for a while and now I can have music in the kitchen and living room which makes me so so happy 😊😊
I'm so glad I saw this today! I was just about to do the "let's buy the same gift for everyone so I can be done with buying gifts" thing. I get really wrapped up in the excitement of gift giving and I want to try to refocus on choosing thoughtful things that are handmade, thrifted, or purchased from local artists. They always end up being great gifts anyway! Thanks as always Leena.
I usually avoid Black Friday but this year I decided to buy a new battery, new SSD and an additional Ram for my laptop. In this way I can prolong the life of my laptop, which is already give years old and make it last longer. This should help me avoid buying a new device in one year or so (=less waste) and also help me save money.
My partner and I are discussing getting a bidet for ourselves for Xmas and honestly, it feels like an exercise in trying to think up a gift because “this the season.” All I want for Xmas are a few nice meals and visits with family and friends.
I second the request in the chat for a holiday gift guide video.
I did collaborate with some of my family members a few years ago, and now we mostly just "gift" charitable donations for each other. We each have a cause near and dear to us, and if we're gathering in person I'll print the confirmation and stuff it in an envelope so that they have something to open. Plus my company matches donations (if you work for a big corporation check if yours does too!) so we get double the effect for each dollar donated.
But outside that group it can be difficult to come up with ideas, especially for people you aren't actually that close too (in laws), or kids. And my SO wants "real gift wrap" so I need to find something that balances less waste, affordable, and meets his aesthetic or the plastic stuff will get snuck in to the house.
Yesterday's video by Leena's author friend Jen Campbell is her latest book haul, AND she invites viewers to leave a comment on that video asking for suggestions for books for a particular reader in your life. She's going to review the comments and post a gift guide in a few weeks.
(Leena, I would love to see a collab video by you and Jen in the not too distant future - maybe with you two on vid chat, since she's still in London. 🥰)
This video is exactly what I needed! I have found myself consuming so much more now that I can drive and have a job. A few years ago I really didn't spend money on anything and I was very happy with that but now I live by myself and so much more freedom with what I consume. I feel like i've gone in the opposite direction. Granted, I do actually need most of the stuff I am getting. I guess I'm just struggling with finding the balance of what I want and actually need.
Also definitely want to work on just appreciating something exists without taking it home!
I SO love the perspective you present with this - I feel so seen and not like a bad person for actually liking stuff! While it's all very easy to say just plainly "you don't need more stuff in your life," that's not extremely useful for those of us who do enjoy t h i n g s and appreciating the actual beauty and joy and fun of life and the stuff in it! I love that I don't feel guilted by this video and therefore are much more receptive to the message which is incredibly valuable - and omg "do you want to own it or do you just like that it exists?" holy shit lmao. I now have that perspective in my lexicon of understanding how my brain can work, thank you for that as well. like the "I just wanna shrink it and put it in my pocket so I can just look at it sometimes" but you don't actually Have to have the t h i n g to do that! Idk I just love this video.
Black Friday made sense in the United States before online shopping. It is the day after Thanksgiving, so lots of people with office jobs (obviously not those in retail or service) would have a day off work to go physically out shopping and get good deals on Christmas presents. Now that it's inexplicably a week long, and everyone can shop online whenever they want anyway, it's just shops hiking up their prices for months BEFORE November and selling things for a reasonable amount in what would otherwise be a random week. It doesn't work anymore for sustainability and over-consumerism reasons either...but it genuinely just doesn't make sense anymore at all.
Something that helps me to give thoughtful gifts is to buy stuff for the person whenever I'm in a shop and think "oh, X would love this!" That way I don't have the ill-fated Christmas shopping trip where I throw money at ticking stuff off my list. Plus it means that I can get stuff with patterns and colours that are out of season and the person would prefer :)
I love gift giving because I love making others happy. But as much as I don't want to receive anything I don't really need, I don't want to give anything the recipient might not be fully on board with. So by now my family & friends know that, unless they *tell me* what they want, they're not getting christmas/birthday gifts. I've also told them "if I don't ask for anything, please don't give me anything". Of course there are people who really frown at the idea of not giving christmas gifts (like my mom, or grandma), those I tell to give me something that will be used up, like something to eat, fancy soap, a nice candle, gift cards for my favorite yarn store. They can scratch their gift-giving itch and I'm not burdened with something that - in my eyes - just takes up space.
This system often leads to more interesting gifts than just buying a random thing. One year my brother asked for a dish for his birthday party as a gift, we had a great buffet because everyone brought something different. Another year there were bad harvests in Turkey so hazelnuts were either expensive or sold out, and I had complained that I couldn't find any for baking. So for christmas my mom got me a bunch of baking ingredients - including hazelnuts! These are the memorable things.
The point from Hannah's video on the desire to own things coming from a love of beauty and beautiful things was such a revelation for me and it has taken the guilt out of the way I consume which, in turn has made it easier for me to control my consumption; It's taken away the feeling like I was cheating on diet whenever I saw something that was pretty that I wanted (even if I didn't buy it!) Acknowledging that things are pretty and you're glad they exist in the world but they don't have to exist in your home and giving time to your existing creativity has been magic! Something that Hannah also suggested in her video is playing dress ups in your wardrobe which has been SO MUCH FUN, basically go watch Hannah's video also.
I have a list of kids gifts I will be buying before Xmas no matter what, so I’m price watching in hopes I get a few quid off on Black Friday. I find the shops have better deals before Black Friday tbh. I lost my job recently so I’m counting the pennies.
I came back here several days after watching this video to say this: I have been repeating the mantra “do I really want this, or do I just like that it exists” so often. What a revelation! You have shifted my mindset in such a useful way. Thank you!😘
two things that always keep my head on my shoulders in terms of spending is, 1.) where is it going to fit/go in my space and how can I get the most use out of it. and 2.) always look at the shipping price for online purchases... 9 times out of 10 I will not make a purchase because the shipping cost deters me and the few times i have gone ahead with the purchase is if the thing is something i genuinely have time, space and passion for.
I got into the habit of keeping a list throughout the year, so when friends/family mention something they need or want, I just write it on the list and slowly buy them throughout the year. It spreads the cost over the year and means I have more control over when I go for deals of specific items. I also like putting things in my Amazon basket, letting them sit there and checking back to see if any discount has been applied. It also means that when I do actually go to buy something from Amazon, I have to remove everything from my basket (so as to not purchase it) and manually have to add the wanted items back in. Often a few get chipped off the list as my desire for it has wavered by that point!
This really resonated for me... The sentimental purchases are the ones that I struggle with most. Do these vintage Christmas ornaments remind me of some of the happiest times of my childhood? Yes. Do I need to buy every vintage Christmas ornament I come across at thrift stores? No but I do want to buy them so much. Imagining the happy person that will also love them if I don't buy them is such a helpful tip. Also being able to appreciate that something exists without owning it might be life changing for me. Thank you!
I try to avoid Black Friday as I've never really wanted to like idk get crushed at Best Buy but what gets me is CYBER MONDAY!!! Oh boy I even was thinking like "oh yeah I've been wanting a game like this" or "yeah I like these kinds of games maybe I'll get one" but like?? I don't need them and I don't want them and I didn't want them until I realized cyber Monday was coming! I might only try to get a party game because I don't have a lot of multiplayer games but I'm going to keep these questions in mind when it comes to literally any other game
I'm trying to ramp up to a conversation with my mum about her gift giving. She genuinely shows love through buying people lots of gifts and I get where she is coming from, but every year we get piles of things we don't want or need and it's deeply stressful. I don't want to upset her but something needs to change.
I've also recently been trying to get back to a feeling I had when I was little, when I would be so excited to save up my allowance for weeks to buy one thing I really wanted. I'm trying to do that with my adult money now, and enjoy the process of saving for one good quality item that will hopefully last me for many many years. I just bought a Le Creuset Dutch Oven, and that's something our family (or others) will be able to cook in for generations, and it's both very useful and very pretty.
I love my stuff too! It makes me not want to get rid of things, and so when my house is full I don't want anything more. Christmas gifts that people can use up, or eat, are perfect for people that don't need stuff.
I watched this video, kept thinking about "do I want to own it or do I like that it exists?" And am now back to tell you Leena, you rocked my world. Turns out, with many things I just like that they exist and that I don't necessarily need to buy it to have it in the world.
Man, I was really struggling with overspending a year ago and now I feel like I'm doing a lottttt better since a couple of months. Part of it was because I started actually selling some old things I couldn't wear or didn't wear anymore, and finding out how much less it was worth in comparison to what I spend on it myself: very petty!!! but that really made me actually appreciate the value of clothes more (in that the stuff I love is worth a lot to me, but the stuff I'm not even sure really suits me is not, even though its pretty).
Also; because I've been really looking more through my own clothes and figuring out what I end up wearing a lot, I feel a lot more like I'm wearing my clothes instead of the clothes wearing me. I feel "cooler" because I found out I do have clothes that really suit my personality and life (also all of the different styles you like that come together in what you have and can combine). I think that's something I struggled with a lot, because I was constantly swayed by different influencers I liked with new styles and "trends" coming in. And thinking about it, I really admire people who stick to what they like, and you can tell through their consistent style. I really love Zoe Kravitz' style for example, its very her, and also incorporates different vibes anyway. Also, when I want something I will put it on the backburner to see if I still like it months later. A plus is that usually if you stick it out, it'll go on sale and you can get the thing you still like after 4 months or so.
Then there's the "if I do get the buying jitters I might get a small nailpolish or a hairclip instead" which is less damaging to me than the amount of clothes there are in the world.
But I'm not perfect, I became slightly obsessed with Marlowe Granados' style recently (her book is really good, and she has this AMAZING feminine and pastel colors style, which I love but don't wear a lot because it makes me feel a bit vulnerable where I live) and got a second hand pucci top
I never buy anything for Black Friday. I don’t get fast fashion, nor makeup or so. But. I actually got my mother a kitchen aid on discount. Black Friday in the Netherlands lasts a couple of days, so I had time to think it over. I think she’ll have it for life, and it’s worth every penny if she doesn’t have to tire her hands while making dough or such.
i feel like black friday sales only make sense if you need/want something and make a plan to buy it once it's on sale, doing all the prep of choosing the best fit for your requirements in advance. otherwise it's very hard to make good choices just scrolling through sites designed to make you buy stuff you don't need (at least for me). i'm getting refills of some of my more expensive skincare items, that's it :)
Finally! Someone that is coming from a place of wanting the shiny but resisting it anyway xx
I always come out of your videos feeing like I understand myself a little better - I’ve been trying to answer the question “why do own a wardrobe full of clothes that I don’t want to wear?” And this video has made it alarmingly clear that it’s because I’ve been styling myself based around a desire to be taken seriously (and thus benching the fun, colourful, slightly zainy clothes I lust after, and buying “sensible” things)
I feel so much better since acknowledging that my taste isn’t serious, I don’t have a job that requires me to dress sensibly and so my wardrobe can be whatever I want
I've never really liked the whole Black Friday phenomenon (for many reasons, including having worked food service shifts that day - people are so rude when they're hyper focused on buying stuff!). However I have used the sales to get things I truly needed and wanted (last year was a skillshare subscription and an indoor gardening system). So this year I will buy reusable ear plugs (need them for work) and new underwear (most of mine are completely worn out). My general question for sales is "would I still buy _____ if it was full price?" Chances are if the answer is no then I dont really need/want it.
I totally get the leaving the things for other people and imagining their joy. I do the same with pennies... stay with me here... so you know the expression, see a penny pick it up and all day you'll have good luck... well... I like to see the penny, think "ooh luck!" but I then leave the penny for the next person and just think, I've had some luck, they can have the penny and some luck too. I do appreciate that's bonkers. But hey, it makes me happy.
I'm going to write these down and put them on my fridge. Great advice, thank you! The question I usually consider before buying any clothing is "do I love this right now because it's trending, or will I love this forever?" I try to only buy things that will stand the test of time and if it's because of a trend, I don't buy it.
Your intro made me laugh out loud! 😂 I totally get the need for nice stuff! Several years ago, my annoyingly practical mother decided that we all had enough stuff and that Christmas would be about helping others. Therefore , since then, no more gifts, we just donate to our favourite charity. Feels so much better and helps me avoid the temptation of Black Friday. Thanks so much for this valuable guide. Love what you do.❤!
Ok I'm gonna write so much, I'm sorry. Hoarder in remission here. Also had seasons of pretty dysfunctional shopaholism. Like to believe I have both of those semi-under control at the moment but the diseases are always ...lurking.
First off, I very much laughed loudly at the description of minimalists not actually liking stuff because it's so true. And I do like stuff. And also donuts. So so so true.
Secondly, I have to scratch the same itch you described about going into shops and like putting things together in my mind and fulfilling that creative need. If I'm feeling strong (Like I won't need to buy something) I will go to stores just to look at stuff to inspire me. And like you said, it'll evoke a feeling and an image, and then I can sort through in my mind the insane collection of things I already have and make something similar, be it an outfit or art piece or vignette. It works very well if you were already a hoarder who could still access some of your belongings. While I've tried decluttering, it's been a slow process so I didn't have any panic attacks and I can stop myself from buying more if I can remember what I have and use it properly.
As for the actual topic at hand, Black Friday. It used to be a dangerous time for my shopping season. Thankfully, I don't have a ton of money right now, so I know I can't do that. Still, I make a list before Black Friday of the things I will search for deals on and those are the only things. So my favorite underwear I buy every year on black friday, this year I need to stock up on my favorite daily chapstick. Things like that. Everyday use items that I can get a slightly better price on and only buy once a year. Then I usually have one or two things from a brand I've been pining after for a few years but never felt it was the right time to purchase, whether for the price or if I didn't think I would really use the item enough to justify it. But I'll look for black friday deals on those few items to see if now is the time to let myself try those 1 or 2 things. AND I usually have one cleaning tool I'm pining after- the good vacuum. The steam cleaner. The carpet shampooer. I usually have a cleaning item I want I'll use this time to get discounts. However this year I don't think I need any more cleaning tools. I'd like a portable upholstery extractor for the cars, but I don't need it and due to other expenses, now is not the time for that.
I also have some services I'd like done but have pushed to the backburner. Some area rugs that are in storage I need to get professionally cleaned...but just hasn't been top of the money priority list. Or canvases I need to get stretched at a framing place. But services don't usually have Black Friday deals, so those probably still won't get done for a while.
So basically I survive Black Friday the same way I try to survive the rest of the year. Knowing I don't have much money, knowing I already have a TON of stuff and can probably do what I need and want with most of that, and knowing there is ALAYS list of money requirements and priorities, and a couple of discounts don't mean more NON-essentials get to skip the line ahead of essentials (like saving for a house repair or something.) ANNND my favorite thing that I forget to remember. The second I feel like I have extra money and buy something I didn't need. And I mean the SECOND. Something big will happen that I'll need money for. Vet expense for the pets. Car will need an expensive repair. Something. It happens every time. I just bought a hoodie, the car started leaking oil. Like it's just the way life works. Anyway, love the video, sorry for the rant. Dunno why I needed to rant. Oh yeah because I'm avoiding cleaning my house for thanksgiving dinner. Ok.
I really appreciate your comment on using shopping/wishlisting in place of other forms of creative expression. For practical and mental reasons, I'm not always able to pursue painting, sewing, music etc. This is a great reminder to try to channel creativity away from consumerism 🙂
Totally on board with you, Leena. Black Friday coming around made me realize that there are certain basic necessities I've been putting off buying that would make my life a lot easier, like hangers because I have more clothing than hangers, or bookshelves. Funny thing is I ended up feeling sick, so I didn't have the energy to buy anything at all! But I do to want to make more of an effort to buy the things I need, or find them second hand if I can, and then impulse by less of random items from thriftstores that I can live without.
I caught myself the other day. I wanted to drop $165 on a limited edition color way of a kettle. It was beautiful and would match my kitchen color scheme. It seemed to have high reviews, and I almost clicked buy, but I stopped to actually read the reviews and found out many people rated it highly because it was pretty, but admitted it wasn’t functionally ideal. The complaints all came after they all owned it for only a couple months and said it actually stopped working well after a while. While I was sad to make the smart choice, I’m also glad I didn’t impulse buy something because it was limited edition, under the guise that it was a practical item of seemingly higher quality that would last me forever.
Leena please make 5:17 to 6:34 into a reel (if it's a bargain who is losing out) so I can share it 💕
I'm so proud of myself because there are things that I know (almost for certain) I will buy at some point, that are on offer right now- but I am making a point of not buying them yet because a) times change and I might not buy them, b) I'm not ready for them to be in my life just yet (work clothes for a job that I want and am training for but do not yet have and therefore have little purpose for) c) Black Friday is at the end of the month and just before payday and quite simply there is too much month at the end of my money for this.
More videos of you I watch, the more I believe your channel maybe be my favourite youtube channel. Each of your videos are so brilliant, interesting, comforting, essential and entertaining. I'm so glad that your content, your creativity and your words can make a way into the world. So thank you so very much
I have been caught in the trap by black Friday in the past but this year I promised myself that the only thing I will buy just because of the sale is noise cancelling headphones, I just moved to London and have been in need of them for a little while now so buying them on black Friday feels like a win-win as I know they'll be cheaper than they are usually
I hope you find some good headphones!
Truly in need of more warm layers for under my clothes, thermal leggings and long sleeves. Winter in coming fast!
Wow. These are great questions! Each one hits harder than the one before. Goodness. I may need to go journal after this smack down of truth.
For me Black Friday is for a few well researched practical bits and bobs I have just about managed without but not really and have struggled to buy second hand and not having to pay full price for them - like a new vacuum cleaner 😅
I really needed this reminder! Recently moving countries, being stressed with my masters, and wanting to make my apartment as comfortable as possible, I find myself scrolling shopping sites more and more, which is unusual for me. Your advice - especially the point about just liking that something exists! (me every single day finding something I appreciate) - was necessary. Thank you Leena! 😊
I was considering purchasing something non-fast fashion to wear to a friend's wedding this Black Friday, but now you've got me thinking of renting something instead...thanks as always for the food for thought!
Every year my self and my close friends sit in a circle (normally in October/November) and we tell each other what we would like. We tell each the shows/movies/books/records we really want. It's means everyone get something they want.
You have BLOWN MY MIND with the creativity craving thing. I'm going to test it out, but I'm pretty sure this is 100% me. Woah.
my god, so many good points.
I forgot to think of the laborers. if I really needed it, I wouldn't have been waiting for the sale. my imaginary savings comes at their tangible physical expense.
EDIT for a future video idea: are there ways to ethically buy small electronics (like speakers and computer accessories and such)?
thank you, love you
Last year I bought something specifically on black friday, because I had meant to buy the thing for a while now, but it was quite pricey (for me, not in general), so I waited for the sale.
The point you made about how we want gift giving to be over and give into the selfish impulse to just buy it really resonated with me. This Christmas I have started buying presents a little earlier at local craft/ flea markets and am thus seeing the whole process as a lot less overwhelming, urgent and stressful!
This is really helpful thank you. I was just finishing my bottle of Olaplex when I realised it was Black Friday so went to get some, but then I saw a couple other things on the site "since I'm here" and added them to my cart even though I fully don't need them. I had to break for dinner (and TH-cam) before finalising my cart so thank you for saving me 😅 I've definitely become more wary of buying stuff in general because of your videos so thank you for all your work on making this approachable and giving us nuanced and relatable ways of dealing with difficult topics 💜
The one thing I'm planning to buy and definitely need is a new pair of glasses, because mine have been broken since June or July and I desperately need the headaches to stop.😪
I love the intro/framing of this video.
Resonates with my relationship to physical items. This video is an emotionally engaged take on consumption and I’m LIVING for this narrative
The idea that you make somebody else happy by not buying it because they will love it and buy it is mind-blowing. I will definitely remember that.
Kathy B
I need new pants too.
I'm at an age where I've realised that in regards to buying/making things that are very similar to things I already have and like a lot (particularly if I wear it and feel great in for long hours), that I should get them. It isn't a waste to get more of what I like, it just means that I'm going to have more outfits that I feel good in. I've realised that I like layering certain shaped dresses and playsuits over my tshirts and sweaters and I should have more dresses that I can use that way rather than others that are different and don't let me wear it with the other layers that make me feel comfortable and safe.
Though it is still important for me to make sure that theyre different enough in colour, material or texture so I'm not just getting something that won't get used as much as the one I already have
I just moved into my very first own apartment (after years of living with flatmates / partners) and I got quite a few things that had been on my to-buy list anyway and I waited to buy them until they came on sale, which is jelling or at least feels like it’s helping quite a bit
LOVE that you still have and wear that pink fluffy cardi!!❤
I have a little thought that has lived in my brain since I did a hyperfocused deep dive into fashion history and the fast fashion industry one term way back in school: who’s not getting paid for this?
This phrase alone has prevented me from buying so so many truly unwanted/unneeded items.
I also think about that argument for fast fashion many people make that we need cheap options for poor people. As a poor person, I would prefer a universal liveable wage that includes being able to buy the things I need for a fair price. I’ve lived without such income for my whole adult life, and I’ve managed to keep fast fashion shopping to a minimum. I love second hand clothes, mending, altering, or making for myself.
Also, I live as a minimalist but am attracted to maximalist styles. It’s possible to find a balance, I promise! And Leena was absolutely right, feed your creative itch and enjoy all the art in the world, but leave it out in the world more often than bringing something in, it is just as satisfying as attempting to own all the pretty and colourful things. And if you do really want to bring something wonderful and creative home, it’s a thoughtful purchase from a small artist who is being paid and is so thrilled to sell to you, or you giving something new life.
Leena, amazing and insightful video as usual!
I've been watching your content for years and I think this is one of, if not my favourite videos of yours!! super insightful, informative, witty and so godamn useful! Gahh thank you for blessing us with these vids Leena
I never thought about buying things on sale as sending a message to companies that I would be happy putting less money towards something. I wonder how much this does affect pricing.
As someone who buys a mixture of ethical/secondhand and fast fashion, I framed it as well, if I get it on sale and pay less for it then the company is making less of a profit.
It's always such a pleasure listening to you. Thank you for making great content Leena :)
All fantastic questions! Another one that’s very helpful to me when I’m tempted by impulse purchases is “what else could I use this money for?” Immediately puts unplanned purchases into perspective when I think of them in terms of how many many groceries they could buy, or how many of the things I actually need I could cross off my list for the same amount. Sometimes “the thing” I’m considering still ends up being worth it, but either way, this question has helped a lot in evaluating my priorities.
I'm waiting for Black Friday to buy some sims expansions. I was looking at them last month and decided to wait for the sale. If forget, it means it's no longer relevant, if I buy them, it's probably the best price for the next few years.
I know this isn't strictly Black Friday related but on the subject of gifts one thing to ask is do I have some kind of skill or just time I can offer instead of a material thing? How about offering to arrange a time to babysit for your friends so they can have a date night or even just a nap? Can you sew, see if a friend needs a favourite garment mended, hemmed or taken in? Do you know how to sharpen knives offer to sharpen dull knives so someone can have a more enjoyable cooking experience. How about just an hour or two of time to help with a task they just need some help and or moral support to get completed.Has someone you know been talking about doing something forever, a friend of mine had a china cabinet that the glass got broken out of she kept talking about replacing the glass but just never got around to it so I got the glass cut and put it in for her she was freaking thrilled. Another friend noticed I'd made new numbers for my house she mentioned she liked them and needed new numbers for her own house as hers where very small and hard to see from the road, so I made her numbers. We all have little tasks we want to get done but for one reason or another never seem to get around to wouldn't it make you feel so loved and heard if you mentioned said task to a friend and for Christmas they did the task for you!
My blender which I use all the time sparked and died the week before Black Friday. Gonna go into those sites with blinkers on.
Hair looks great Leena! I never remember to buy anything during the Black Friday sales. It wasn't a thing for most of my life and I never got into the swing of it. I used to feel annoyed about the thing I bought being in the sale the following week but now I have made peace with it and would really rather not take part in Black Friday. The one American tradition I can get behind at this time of year is pumpkin pie. I make one every year and they taste great
will be revisiting this video every day this week because i am not the strongest gal, thank u for ur service
I closed all the tabs , thank you
I've always been fascinated by black Friday. I look at ads for big items and the deals never seem good enough for the stress and hassle. I've never deemed worth participating in (at least on a big scale), but maybe my interest is partly due to wishing I did want to participate. Thank you for this helpful video.
You’re right that this is often too much to have in one’s head. If only we could automate that reminder. There are so many Chrome extensions to help you get a discount based on what site you’re on but I haven’t heard of any that give you a helpful checklist before you click purchase. If it doesn’t exist, I’ll put it in my coding project ideas. I don’t know the first thing about making chrome extensions but this seems like one of the more helpful ideas I’ve had.
Edit- from like 30 secs of searching ‘anti consumerism’ and ‘shopping addiction’ chrome extensions, there are a few with various ways of reducing the ability to shop or reframing what the price means, etc.
I'm glad I subscribed, your videos are really well thought-out and clever :)
The sizing thing simply does not apply when you are satisfied with your wardrobe as is, which has been my experience from pre-pandemic to now. The only things I feel could add to my wardrobe is a solid vest or two, or snowpants (like you wear when skiing), both of which would require a trip to specific stores I'm unwilling to do around this time of year as I'm repulsed by crowds. I could ask for a gift card to a ski shop but that's the closest I'll get to going to a mall before new years.
Most of my christmas list include physical video games, CDs and DVDs, which I understand as physical medium will be around long after I die, but I can pass them among friends and family, where I can't (legally) with digital versions, and if I was to lose power for days I can still listen to the CDs on an old school player with batteries, or play the games on portable systems that don't require external power. The DVDs are partly to share shows with my dad who has no internet, and partly to support creators in case the network pulls them from streaming (like you may have heard about the mess from HBO max's merger).