Soft White Underbelly interview and portrait of Christian, a heroin addict living on Skid Row. Here’s a link to audio only versions of SWU videos: asmrdb.fanlink...
So many addicts are smart and talented. My son was clean 10 years and very successful, he relapsed and I lost him BUT he was so so talented like this guy. PLS PLS go home and get clean! You deserve it dude. I wish you luck 🍀
It absolutely sickens me. What gives these perverts a right to take these kids innocence. As adults, it really screws up their life mentally and emotionally. I hope this man finds peace.
I’m right with you , the fact it can be ANYONE ! Man or Woman but the creepy way they go about grooming is just so calculated and I can’t no matter how many times , I hear it , wrap my head around it , it’s shocking! 🙏❤️fifi
@SAGEBYDESIGN 99.9% of firefighters are very kind, compassionate and brave family men who risk their lives to rescue and save us. It’s a shame how easy it is for just ONE bad apple to cause us all to never fully trust a certain group of people again. Like the church who protected the wicked fireman. Shame on that disgusting pastor and I will never trust my children with a clergyman. You just can’t trust anyone. Even your own family members sometimes. Just sad and makes me sick and angry!
Christian, your 'call to be great' moment might be teaching high school kids. Hear me out: you'll get a free degree and you WILL change many lives who need direction. I'm an artist w ADHD, you described my mind, too. I did this at 40. Go into the many alternative teaching programs (Teach for America, NYC Teaching fellows, etc) for the free college and placement. You WILL have a mission - you'll see yourself in these kids- a reason to be clean and you will never be bored, I guarantee. High school kids need you, they're about to go out and make lasting life decisions, often without a caring adult like you had with your mom. Think about it. It is a position where you would be great, you're exactly the kind of man we need desperately.
I just commented he sounds like he has ADHD as well!!! I was recently diagnosed and if he could be on the appropriate meds- he may feel better and not as if he’s battling his own mind and self daily. This is great advice!!!! This comment made me tear up💕💕
Great advice Jesse, I got sober and knew focusing on a substantial goal was the key to keep me in the game of life. After finishing an Associates Degree w/ a 4.0 and honor classes I was accepted into the University of California, Irvine with a full scholarship and earned a Bachelor's, decades older than the other students. You have so much to offer, kids want to learn from you, don't let this moment pass. The rest of your life will be filled with opportunities.
I agree, what I said toward the end was - You're a teacher Christian, I'm a born teacher and I see a bit of myself in you - kids would love you, and they all could relate to you, most especially the ones who need someone positive to relate to. I could also see him as a motivational type speaker, but I far more see him teaching, if he's into any sports I could also see him as an amazing coach.
All of the beautiful ADHD minds that I know and love have this gift... This energy and creativity. Jack of all trades and complex strong emotions. All that when managed and supported... Can be absolutely amazing. Those that are not diagnosed or untreated... Struggle just like this. Knowledge is power and we can't change what we won't acknowledge. Early intervention and management is key. But anyone can benefit at any age if given the right tools and support. Thank you for making this comment. 💜 I can absolutely see Christian thriving in something like this.
I know you have great intentions saying this but, he did find something that makes him happy and he did find a purpose in life and it's heroin. However, the problem is that we are going to treat him like a scumbag instead of like somebody who really needs help
About 2 years ago me and my crew saw a heroin addict walking by extremely happy across the street... as you may know the H rule (if a junkie is happy , he has heroin money on him). Long story short we jump him , knock him down and rob him cold. He got 220 euros. About 6 months later he commit suicide. The point is I still laugh about it like it was yesterday. I mean I felt sorry for who ? A junkie? We saw her sister about a week ago.... I try to smash her but she said no... I told her about her brother plus I say "if he was here 30 times I would smash him again 30 times, nobody even like him" and she cry a lot and started shaking. The point is some of us are the bad guys of the stories and WE DONT GIVE A FLYING F*CK ABOUT IT , WE STIL LAUGH ABOUT THE INJURIES WE DONE.
@@user-lp2bl9fb8d Awwww are you trying to get some attention? You poor little thing. With that attitude I bet a “junkie” could beat the shit out of you.
Well. I love Christian. He has a beautiful soul. I'm 45 and still have no idea what my purpose is. I have my 5 children to focus on for now though. I vote you do what makes your heart feel good Christian. My heart feels best when I paint, or when I fix things. I love fixing things people throw away. I think that's a silver lining from my trauma filled first 30 years of life. I love my children with every ounce of my soul, I broke the cycle, and I see beauty in the broken. I see your beauty too Christian. Just do something even if its a bunch of different things. No one says you have to have a 9-5 to be happy. Write the stuff, fix the things, be kind, like a traveling writer/handyman who isn't a jerk. You're super cute, and young looking too. Which threw me off, because you don't "look" like other addicts. So run, run away from the drugs while you still have your strength. I know you're meant for something better.
@@juliettezea9507 I've heard the same. Is it part of the plan for me to raise wonderful humans, yes, of course. That's probably not "why" I'm here though. My eldest is already 23, I wouldn't think I've done my part and be done with life once they have all reached adulthood. I'm sure there is something more, which may be something as simple as giving other people hope. I don't think the only thing I can do is be a mom. I actually feel kind of bad when a woman feels that's all she is here for, because there is always more, even if its something she can't see herself. Just being the change to break a cycle I suppose could be part of the plan, but I'm sure we are here for something else too. Like I said, haven't quite figured that part out yet. Are my children my world, my heart, my soul, 100 percent without a doubt. I just don't see it as being all I am meant to do. Who knows though, perhaps it is. Still trying to figure out life like the majority of people.
Was just thinking... Sure hope he does actually get outta that whirlpool before the choices aren't available anymore! You STILL got a LIFE and purpose here man!!! 😬🙏🙏🍀💌
@@vikicarts1772 I don't know much about that type of lifestyle...but I know enough to understand fent. is a seriously deadly problem and it's mixed in all kinds of hard drugs... If I'm going to take a chance with anything, it's going to be in the naturally God given herbs actually put on this Earth for all to consume. I don't trust anything man has had his hand in making😬😐 Lol...noooo thanks.
@@gurumayne8684 thank god fetty doesn’t seem to have made its way to the U.K. yet. If anyone is going to dabble get on the onions. However if someone is living on the street it’s highly unlikely they will have access and funds to get the pure brown. Yet another kick in the teeth for people who live in poverty.
Love this idea...you may be the key to the lock I've yet been able to open, thank you so much for your wonderful insight. You are truly a blessing to those you encounter on a daily basis, and we should all be so lucky as to recieve your clear, concise, and to the point wit. And no, I'm not being a smartass...I'm as serious as I've ever been. And when I get what I feel is a good idea, watch out, because I take it to the extreme and finish strong, and now I have a rock solid reason to give the other side it's fair shake. Know of the good you've done here, ( and a million other places I'm sure).I know I know...my punctuation is terrible and I'm seriously reckless with commas and run ons
@@christianphillips7788 It worked for me. The brain isn’t motivation toward long term goals during addiction, no matter what kind of person you are. The part of the brain involved in planning and decision making is seriously damaged by addictive use & comes back only with abstinence. True story. Read “Understanding Addiction: Know Science, No Stigma,” by Dr. Chuck Smith and Dr. Jason Hunt. You will see that your inability to “find yourself” during addiction is not your fault. The addiction is not your fault. And your brain will go back to how it was, if you abstain long enough, maybe better!
@@christianphillips7788 well you have a lot bigger balls than me, I'll prob take mine to the grave... It was a family member so makes it a little different, or I'm just making excuses for being a wimp ha. You're right, you saved a lot of people, what a champ! How r u doing today? I can relate a lot to u, my mind is a chaotic mess, but strangely I have found stability in my life (I own a home, have a stable job, and am married). I hope you can find peace and stability... You can do it and you deserve it.
@@christianphillips7788 Wow, that’s quite an accomplishment, to your credit. I know what you mean. Everything I’ve gone through will be worth it, if I can help others in a significant way, because of it. You’re a very compassionate person. That’s a huge strength, as long as we don’t let others walk on us, but you didn’t just fall off the turnip truck.
I thought I was just doing drugs and alcohol for fun and I could take it or leave it and get sober when ever I wanted. When I tried to get sober is was impossible and a million times harder then I could have ever imagined! Now coming up on 2 years 8 months it’s worth the struggle. Hope and miracles is what I live for! Hope you get it soon Christian!
About 2 years ago me and my crew saw a heroin addict walking by extremely happy across the street... as you may know the H rule (if a junkie is happy , he has heroin money on him). Long story short we jump him , knock him down and rob him cold. He got 220 euros. About 6 months later he commit suicide. The point is I still laugh about it like it was yesterday. I mean I felt sorry for who ? A junkie? We saw her sister about a week ago.... I try to smash her but she said no... I told her about her brother plus I say "if he was here 30 times I would smash him again 30 times, nobody even like him" and she cry a lot and started shaking. The point is some of us are the bad guys of the stories and WE DONT GIVE A FLYING F*CK ABOUT IT , WE STIL LAUGH ABOUT THE INJURIES WE DONE.
Anyone coming down on Mark for this needs to understand that not all gay people were completely born that way. There have been countless examples of people being molested and traumatized into a life of sexual confusion and continued immortality until they heal and realize they aren’t simply gay and suppressed.
Agreed, pretty weird thing to say. I guess maybe he meant more by that and didn't go into it, like others have mentioned maybe mentioning the specific trauma could have made him question his sexuality more than he would have without it. But "made you gay" just sounds ignorant of the way these things actually work.
You are in denial about how heroin dictates your life. Truth is you are just a successful thief. You are just making excuses for your time on skid row. You are better than this.
I feel like he has ADHD I’m not sure if it’s just in my head because I was recently diagnosed at the age of 30. Feel like I can relate so much to him it’s like your brain is always on overdrive you can never relax it’s overwhelming. People with ADHD also have a hard time thinking about the Consequences, here now in the moment kind of people. Whatever is going on I wish you the best of luck you can get sober and live a life Beyond what are you even imagine.
From two minutes in I was completely captivated. This dude reminds me so much of myself. Too smart for our own good, excellent relationship with our parents, brains on overdrive that H helped level out, interest in everything, rich life stories, we’re writers, we’re story tellers, similar outlook on life that there’s no regrets - just lessons learned, living a buck wild life… I’m sure there’s more. As much as that intrigues me it terrifies me at the same time. I identify with not knowing where I belong or what I’m supposed to be doing with my life because I’m so deeply entranced with everything. Mark was right though, you just have to pick something and do it. Luckily I figured that out. Hopefully this gentleman also does before he wakes up at 50 in the same spot. If I were him, I’d be keeping a journal every day of life out there and after a few years try to get that published. Clearly everybody is fascinated with these types of stories, that’s why we’re here on this channel, so there’s definitely a market for it. Christian if you’re reading this - DO IT DUDE! I’ll help edit it. The saddest thing in life is wasted potential. Please don’t let that be you. ♥️
I enjoyed reading your comment and well said , I appreciate your words and hope it hits home for christian as it’s always nice too hear a similar story with you saying he can too and don’t leave it till to late . I 100% agree and wish the same for him 2 🙏❤️ fifi
I think maybe you need to just be🤷♂️ although I enjoyed and appreciated your comment, I wonder if you might find some solace in moving your focuses away from yourself. All the best to you
My brother just overdosed today. Luckily he is fine, since his fiancé found him before anything terrible happened. She called off the wedding and I am pretty sure he is going to go right back to using because of this. I have been clean personally for just under two years. I work out now, have two kids with my beautiful wife. I wish I could just shake him and tell him to snap out of it but it is not that easy. I pray for anyone going through addiction. It takes a lot out of you. Mentally, physically, and especially spiritually. Love you all.
Man it’s so tough, really hope your brother can beat the demon somehow. My brother is in a very similar situation, and I just don’t know what to do to help him anymore, he has to want it for himself. It’s just impossibly hard to watch people destruct their lives when you love them
@@Day-ZDuke I agree with an addict will with when they truly want to quit. I guess just be there for him, but don't enable his addiction like giving him money or rides to get something. Also ask him or tell him about kratom. I use it daily and it curbs my addiction to heroin amazingly. Has been a life saver for me.
So this is tough but I am Christians brother. I grew up in the same shitty trailer park and lived with the same bullies and jerkoffs that he had to deal with as a kid. I was almost sexually abused like he was but I got out of there because it didn’t seem ok to me but being so young I wasn’t sure why and I wish I knew better to help him out at that age. We started doing drugs near the same age and we hung in a lot of the same circles. I can vouch for him and tell you all that these stories are all true. The thing that’s super tough for me is in the entire interview he didn’t mention the family he disappointed and left behind in Virginia. He has two wonderful, smart, and extremely loving nephews that he doesn’t call, he doesn’t write especially since that’s his thing, and worst of all being from a single parent home doesn’t want to know because “he didn’t ask us to have kids.” His biggest regret is not doing something with his life! It’s laughable. He had so much potential but his work ethic sucked and he would have no issue fucking you over in a heart beat. I tried to get him clean and he ran off to LA to live in a tent because it makes him happy. So that bullshit about him wanting to be shot if he is still there in five years is either true because it’s a horrible existence and waste of a lifetime or he is lying to us and himself and can’t come to terms with the things he’s done to people that love him and tried to help. I’m not sure what else to say other than Christian I love you but you are 41 and while there might not be a relationship for us in the future you need to get off the dope and put your work boots on and make something of yourself. This video makes me so angry knowing your out there continuing this lifestyle of drugs and stealing in the same breath that your telling people to be kind to each other. Your literally stealing from people and causing trouble. How hypocritical of a statement is that. Do better!
He said "I don't want to put my heart and soul into something that is not what I'm supposed to be doing"... But doing drugs is 100% not something that you are supposed to be doing, but still you have wasted so many years on doing it... If you ever get to read my comment: You are extremely intelligent, interesting, self aware and good looking guy. It's not too late for you, so stop lying to yourself and get some help. The longer you keep doing what you are doing, the smaller is the chance to see the "exit" that you are looking for. You know that. You are not a guy who doesn't understand how it works, you don't need or have to figure it out because you know the answer. Think about your mother and about yourself and take a chance to see how it feels to be on the other, sober side. You got this.. ! I would love to see some update on his story and I hope he will try to get sober. Crossing my fingers and praying for him!
This guy has the ability to go out and teach others about his life. He's got a brilliant way of speaking thoroughly. I'd love to see him do a part two.
Damn. I feel like this dude can do great things if he set his mind to it. He’s super intelligent, ambitious, and self motivated. He could either be homeless and at the mercy of other individuals giving, or he could be a millionaire. It’s literally just up to him make those things happen
Ok Christian. Another 5 yrs on skid row? How about 5 weeks or months instead? The time clock starts now. Are you serious about "shoot me"? If so just leave skid row now and DO SOMETHING. Enough of the Hamlet routine. Such a waste of obvious potential.
I do think that Mark’s question may be taken as offensive (asking Christian if the abuse made him gay) but I think he’s asking it because that’s a common misconception people have with boys who are molested and he wants to dispel that stereotype
"Treat people with kindness". When you "boost" (STEALING is the actual word), you are treating the store owner like shit, not with kindness. Look in the mirror dude.
Having a mission and doing nothing is simply an EXCUSE to stay on drugs and live an irresponsible life. Talking, talking, talking…….doing nothing. Get some help!!!!
People who don't want to recover always speak of it so simply... his grace period all depends on if he gets that heavily fentynal laced product that's taking everyone out
Wow dude tbh with you I think you do have a gift either writing or talking to people there is something about you that really captivates the audience! I was hooked on this one from the start!!! I believe you've experienced so many things that you have so much to share!!! Great video guys!!!
First of all he looks like he could be your cousin, Mark 😂 To me he is speaking his truth and I truely believe he can get through this. Would love to see what happens in the near future with him. Try and manifest your talents and watch for the signs, sometimes it's right infront of us. I wish you all the best. ✌️
Christian, quit waiting for things to HAPPEN to you; make things HAPPEN FOR YOU. You haven’t hit bottom yet, but it’s coming, that’s for sure. Get busy.....
Seems like another person self-medicating purely to get through this type of world in which we all live. I hope he makes it out alive and finds what it ever it is he was supposed to be.
@@JetSkiSuper7 "Dealt with accordingly" is a Blanket term. If "dealt with accordingly" means by political ends; that part to which we lend ourselves is far worse than any form of individual irresponsibility that we've seen here.
@@JetSkiSuper7 Try to think of yourself as an individual rather than just part of the collective. It is that collective thinking that created the "fucking scum" you hate.
@@JetSkiSuper7 Do you think Christian would practice his trade (electrician) if there were no laws against him doing so acting as an individual? I know he would have, but YOUR laws, YOUR police have convinced him he should not, that it is "illegal" and therefore he is bad to even think he could do such a thing without permission... You have lost your individuality and assisted in taking his in the process.
Christian, if you were to take a poll by asking a question on here, I believe very few people ever got that clear sign: THIS is what your Career needs to be. I am 60 this year and have had 2 companies, 3 careers not which I would have guessed at 21. But I get you too because I also believe in signs. So here is YOUR SIGN! Get sober. Make a leap and if necessary build wings on the way down. You can succeed!!! Go for it!!!!
I totally feel you when you say that you feel "stuck" because you don't know which way to take your life or which passion to follow. I find that I get so overwhelmed by the thought of making the wrong decision that I get frozen and end up not choosing anything. I was waiting for the longest time for the "perfect" thing to come along I would just know that was my thing, but it didn't happen. Instead I've decided to pick something and just roll with it. I'm hoping that somewhere along the way ill figure it out or ill be able to apply my skill to something I didn't realize was my passion. I think its easy for people to say "just do it" but I think it comes down to having a good support system and having people that encourage you and help you along the way. I could see you doing something with social justice or politics. I too believe we should do things for the greater good and I could see you applying that passion to making the world a better place. I have been sober from alcohol and pills for 8 years and I understand how hard it is to deal with the emotions you have been repressing with the drugs. Waking up everyday sober and with a purpose in life is everything. I hope you are able to break the cycle and find your purpose, you deserve it :)
I think you’ve got a good plan! I hope you find it. I finally have, and it took a long, long time, but now, if G_d or the universe is willing, I have a plan. 🤩
Someday hopefully before I leave this Earth, I hope to see better protection for children from all abuse, especially sexual, that steals the innocence that children deserve to have. Why abusers never consider the life long pain and psychological challenges they cause. I think I know the answer: if you don’t consider anyone but yourself, you just simply don’t care what you do. We are all connected. The pain you cause another gets placed on them, then they place it on someone else, then society and this is the ills collectively we suffer. It is like a pebble in the water that causes so many ripples.Bless you all and stay in a higher vibe, for you and others that you share the world with 🤍☮️🙏🌎⭐️
I feel for this man I do. But " I can't spend 10 years trying to be a lawyer come to find out I'm supposed to be a writer" ommmmg that hit me hard and it was little funny I'm sorry. But I feel it!
“It didn’t make you gay or anything?” Dude… I know these interviews are supposed to be like organic conversations but that’s such a messed up way of phrasing that.
Mark's question was perfect. There are people, boys and girls who have been sexually abused by the same sex that turn towards the same sex for sexual relationships later. Often even though it was traumatic for them, they had a sense of being close or cared for. Now can you see why it wasn't such a strange question. I've worked with children who this happened to and later on in their lives looked for love/sex from the same sex.
@@peacefulwife5199 I think sexuality and trauma affecting it are far too complicated for such a simplistic phrasing. I think it's a terrible question that doesn't really get across what it's asking in an honest way.
I hear you. You are genuinely a beautiful man. You're so intelligent. Insightful. You're handsome and well spoken. You're so strong. You have SO MUCH potential. You deserve more than living on the streets of skid row. Please leave that place before it swallows your soul. You're self medicating. You don't need to luv. You have so much more to offer the world. Your mother needs a hug. Break the cycle.
@Mark Laita, your videos are being posted on tiktok and to someone who didn't k ow better, they'd think the videos belong to the tiktoker and are completely unaware that they belong to you.. sorry lol just wanted to make sure you knew! You work hard on these and deserve the credit
What a HOOT! Christian, please please go get sober and make your dreams come true!! You are a genius!!! Make it happen !!! I hope Mark follows you!! Good luck to you..…. You can do this!!!
@ 19:40 "What I'm supposed to be doing." The enemy of the good is the perfect. That's the barrier for most people with high IQs. And it can be a killer. Just get moving, or you will certainly get run over.
This guy reminds me so much of a former friend of mine. I'm no psychologist but the way this guy acts I'd be willing to bet he's Bipolar type 1 like my former friend. I wish I could say current friend as he's a good person and is one of the most interesting people I've ever known but at a certain point the obvious lies and stealing got to a point that was unbearable. I wish Christian and my former friend all the best and I hope they find their paths to happiness and health.
Totally agree! I used to self medicate then found out I was bipolar when I got sober and felt worse! Now I’m medicated and feel for him because I remember that whole spinning head shit. It still happens but nowhere as bad now. I hope ur friend is well ♥️
I was sexually abused by my father growing up and I can relate to you 💯 percent about being sexually awkward. You said that and I was like "Ding, ding, ding!" Right on the money... It sucks man!
Christian, hi 😊 I totally jump from one subject to another just like that!!! It's my norm! You're awesome and I hope you get better soon! You're an awesome person and I can't wait to see you when you find what your purpose is, I know you'll figure it out! 😊
Mark’s point was conveyed but not fully understood. By ‘Do Anything’ his suggestion is the you choose Something and pursue it to it’s natural conclusion. When you choose nothing you’re a Cop Out - Just someone who tells themselves stories about how great they can be but all they are is a petty street thief. Commit to Something. This requires you to stop BSing yourself and the world and sit down EVERYDAY in the public library and write for 2 hours. After a month you’ll certainly be clear if you have a gift or not.
He's a very intelligent guy. I feel an unusual amount of fondness for him-- probably because he reminds me of my sister a bit. Wish you the best Christian !
You are in decision-paralysis and just need to pick something and do it well like managing the restaurant. Once you do that it will help you get clean THEN you can figure out what you really want to do. Stop taking the easy road and get your ass off skid row and come back in a year and show us what you're capable of.
Thanks for sharing your story, bless your mum for leaving your dad to protect you, Sorry to hear at 6 how your “ grooming was just so calculated “ parents need too talk to their kids super early unfortunately as these low life’s just are so cunning at how they go about it !! I wish you all the best , your just a beautiful soul . I love how you embrace the good, bad and ugly 🙏❤️Fifi
I understand his problem about choosing the path that’s best when he is so capable in so many ways. I know that some people have found the right path by asking the universe daily to show them what to do. In time, it becomes apparent.
You just gotta go out there and try different things. The worst decision is to stay stagnant and do nothing. Always do SOMETHING. Eventually you end up right where life intended.
He has so much potential. If he is this intelligent high then sober he is a genius. I would love to hear him sober. Excited for that day with another interview update.
I think that this gentleman is afraid to succeed I believe I feel the same way about myself I purposely sabotaged or don't pull the trigger on things because with success comes responsibility living in a tent and doing dope all day is the most least responsible you can do that's why I did the same thing without living in a tent for many years I relate to this man and I wish him all the best
@@snyggsarahh Yes the 'born gay' thing was very important to gaining civil rights for gay people but sexual abuse creates confusion in one's sexual expression sometimes. You'll also observe sexual abuse victims are either extremely promiscuous or extremely conservative/prudish and sometimes oscillate between the two throughout their life. Sexual abuse really screws up people's feelings about sex and attraction, in a myriad of ways.
@PeopleAreOutOfPlace Boosting isn't theft, or theft isn't wrong anymore; Prevailing core myths are tough to overturn. Most people resist discussing them. No one discusses it here. We resist differentiating right from wrong. We abdicate our personal responsibility to others, to anyone. We act as if we are still good. Pathetic. If we believe ourselves to be good persons, yet display ignorance to moral and ethical responsibilities, or have worse yet become part of the crime itself, we need to re-examine ourself. There's a disconnect there somewhere. Either we aren't as good as we thought, or we are seriously out of place.
Can't waste ten years.. .. been on skid row for four years...very interesting guy I wish I had one third of his energy. He thinks too much just goes round and round in circles. Smart but can't focus. Not so smart.
This guy is so engaging and interesting. It seems as though he could probably do anything he wanted to if he could just stay focused. Adderall would undoubtedly another addiction but he seems like there's just one thing that needs to be tweaked in that big brain to let him have the life he deserves. I'm going to pray for Christian, that he comes in contact with what he needs to be sober and get his brain to be calm. Updates would be welcomed, Mark.
I watched this one whole. Smart guy, doesn't deserve that. Hope you decide you're done sooner than later. It took the life of the closest person in my life.
20:50 - potential by itself is worth nothing. If you dont know for what you were made for, you have to keep trying. doing nothing as a justification to avoid searching for your passion for 10 years , will result in 10 years o self discovery thrown away. This is fear taking over, dont do this, keep searching
He’s one of the smartest guys you have interviewed so far. Hope he finds his purpose in life and fulfill his goals. I would love to see you make a follow up with him.
seems like hes self medicating for bipolar since he said hes manic a lot, and dont fully realise the trauma. maybe he can get on lithium wich has helped my friend in psychiatry who had bipolar disorder also he was a junkie too
Yet, CA kept Newsom who passed the Law saying if you steal less than $1,000 in any one trip, the store won’t even stop you. I struggle to cope with people who think laws like that are a good idea, but it is their State, so if wholesale theft is the way they want it, it is no skin off my nose 3,000 miles away. I AM surprised at any business owner who opts to stay open in LA and San Fran. Again, if they don’t mind, I shouldn’t either.
Ex user, been on a low does of methadone for about 5 years. It's probably the only thing that has kept me away. I'm trying now the past two months and have drastically reduced my intake of methadone. I have a desire to use heroin everyday practically but know that it's a bad idea. This man is 41? Has been a junkie for basically 20 years if not longer and he looks 33-35. Most alcoholics at that age already look like shit no need to mention meth. Heroin is terrible and it kills so many people, but there are things worse and alcohol is one of them. Like him the only reason I ever started using was because of two unsuccessful surgeries on my wrist. It is broken currently, I live with that pain everyday. It also took me many years to move from pain killers to heroin. I had stopped for several years and when I started again pills were harder to get and prices had sky rocketed. Ive had longer periods of sobriety then him and currently have no intention of using. I hope he makes it through his journey I hope he has a happy ending to his beautiful yet extremely painful life. When you find the power to change everyday will still be a struggle, I hope he has it in him. Sometimes I second guess myself.
You won't know what you're supposed to do until you start trying things, even if you waste some time you get closer to knowing what you really are supposed to be doing. And you learn along the way.
Pick something and just go with it. It may lead to that thing you’re looking for. If you never try anything looking for that perfect thing it may pass you by and you may miss your opportunity.
So many addicts are smart and talented. My son was clean 10 years and very successful, he relapsed and I lost him BUT he was so so talented like this guy. PLS PLS go home and get clean! You deserve it dude. I wish you luck 🍀
I’m so sorry to hear about your son, blessings too you for taking the time to believe in this lovely man. 🙏❤️fifi
So sorry for your loss x💕🇮🇪
So sorry to hear that, was it fentanyl that killed him? When was this?
I am so sorry for your loss of your son
🙏❤️🙏
It absolutely sickens me. What gives these perverts a right to take these kids innocence. As adults, it really screws up their life mentally and emotionally. I hope this man finds peace.
I’m right with you , the fact it can be ANYONE ! Man or Woman but the creepy way they go about grooming is just so calculated and I can’t no matter how many times , I hear it , wrap my head around it , it’s shocking! 🙏❤️fifi
@SAGEBYDESIGN 99.9% of firefighters are very kind, compassionate and brave family men who risk their lives to rescue and save us. It’s a shame how easy it is for just ONE bad apple to cause us all to never fully trust a certain group of people again. Like the church who protected the wicked fireman. Shame on that disgusting pastor and I will never trust my children with a clergyman. You just can’t trust anyone. Even your own family members sometimes. Just sad and makes me sick and angry!
So true
@@BURSRKR Child abusers have put a stain on many professions and programs of value to people. It’s a shame!
Yes, it's so disgusting. It enrages me more than anything.
Christian, your 'call to be great' moment might be teaching high school kids. Hear me out: you'll get a free degree and you WILL change many lives who need direction. I'm an artist w ADHD, you described my mind, too. I did this at 40. Go into the many alternative teaching programs (Teach for America, NYC Teaching fellows, etc) for the free college and placement. You WILL have a mission - you'll see yourself in these kids- a reason to be clean and you will never be bored, I guarantee. High school kids need you, they're about to go out and make lasting life decisions, often without a caring adult like you had with your mom. Think about it. It is a position where you would be great, you're exactly the kind of man we need desperately.
This is so cool and I never knew of such a thing. 👏 Christian could def do this and he's an incredible speaker.
I just commented he sounds like he has ADHD as well!!! I was recently diagnosed and if he could be on the appropriate meds- he may feel better and not as if he’s battling his own mind and self daily.
This is great advice!!!! This comment made me tear up💕💕
Great advice Jesse, I got sober and knew focusing on a substantial goal was the key to keep me in the game of life. After finishing an Associates Degree w/ a 4.0 and honor classes I was accepted into the University of
California, Irvine with a full scholarship and earned a Bachelor's, decades older than the other students. You have so much to offer, kids want to learn from you, don't let this moment pass. The rest of your life will be filled with opportunities.
I agree, what I said toward the end was - You're a teacher Christian, I'm a born teacher and I see a bit of myself in you - kids would love you, and they all could relate to you, most especially the ones who need someone positive to relate to. I could also see him as a motivational type speaker, but I far more see him teaching, if he's into any sports I could also see him as an amazing coach.
All of the beautiful ADHD minds that I know and love have this gift... This energy and creativity.
Jack of all trades and complex strong emotions.
All that when managed and supported... Can be absolutely amazing.
Those that are not diagnosed or untreated... Struggle just like this.
Knowledge is power and we can't change what we won't acknowledge.
Early intervention and management is key. But anyone can benefit at any age if given the right tools and support.
Thank you for making this comment. 💜
I can absolutely see Christian thriving in something like this.
I could’ve listened for hours… articulate, smart and kind. I hope you find your purpose in life that makes you happy. ❤️
I know you have great intentions saying this but, he did find something that makes him happy and he did find a purpose in life and it's heroin. However, the problem is that we are going to treat him like a scumbag instead of like somebody who really needs help
Heroin is his purpose
About 2 years ago me and my crew saw a heroin addict walking by extremely happy across the street... as you may know the H rule (if a junkie is happy , he has heroin money on him).
Long story short we jump him , knock him down and rob him cold. He got 220 euros.
About 6 months later he commit suicide.
The point is I still laugh about it like it was yesterday. I mean I felt sorry for who ? A junkie?
We saw her sister about a week ago.... I try to smash her but she said no... I told her about her brother plus I say "if he was here 30 times I would smash him again 30 times, nobody even like him" and she cry a lot and started shaking.
The point is some of us are the bad guys of the stories and WE DONT GIVE A FLYING F*CK ABOUT IT , WE STIL LAUGH ABOUT THE INJURIES WE DONE.
@@user-lp2bl9fb8d Awwww are you trying to get some attention? You poor little thing. With that attitude I bet a “junkie” could beat the shit out of you.
@@user-lp2bl9fb8d Kharma get you
Good luck 🤞
Well. I love Christian. He has a beautiful soul. I'm 45 and still have no idea what my purpose is. I have my 5 children to focus on for now though. I vote you do what makes your heart feel good Christian. My heart feels best when I paint, or when I fix things. I love fixing things people throw away. I think that's a silver lining from my trauma filled first 30 years of life. I love my children with every ounce of my soul, I broke the cycle, and I see beauty in the broken. I see your beauty too Christian. Just do something even if its a bunch of different things. No one says you have to have a 9-5 to be happy. Write the stuff, fix the things, be kind, like a traveling writer/handyman who isn't a jerk. You're super cute, and young looking too. Which threw me off, because you don't "look" like other addicts. So run, run away from the drugs while you still have your strength. I know you're meant for something better.
Very well said!
Most people I’ve met who have kids say their kids are their life purpose
@@juliettezea9507 I've heard the same. Is it part of the plan for me to raise wonderful humans, yes, of course. That's probably not "why" I'm here though. My eldest is already 23, I wouldn't think I've done my part and be done with life once they have all reached adulthood. I'm sure there is something more, which may be something as simple as giving other people hope. I don't think the only thing I can do is be a mom. I actually feel kind of bad when a woman feels that's all she is here for, because there is always more, even if its something she can't see herself. Just being the change to break a cycle I suppose could be part of the plan, but I'm sure we are here for something else too. Like I said, haven't quite figured that part out yet. Are my children my world, my heart, my soul, 100 percent without a doubt. I just don't see it as being all I am meant to do. Who knows though, perhaps it is. Still trying to figure out life like the majority of people.
Very well stated!
@@JustMeDoc thank you.
"I kind of wonder who I am sometimes." Some folks say the greatest mystery in life is who we truly are. Always interesting, thanks!
Sounds like he's suffering from paralysis by analysis yet has a go with the flow aura. Very interesting. Loved the video
Great summary!
That just spoke to my soul... that describes me more than any other words ever could..thank you
Paralysis by analysis…I’ve so been there! I still get stuck in my head, if I don’t make a point to focus outside myself.
all you morons are mesmerized because of this amazing poetry . I was I was like you...easily amused. @@sciencenotstigma9534
He is smart. Hope the fent doesn't accidentally get him if his H is not 100% H. We need an update video in a couple weeks or months.
Was just thinking... Sure hope he does actually get outta that whirlpool before the choices aren't available anymore! You STILL got a LIFE and purpose here man!!! 😬🙏🙏🍀💌
If he’s buying off the street in the US it’s all fent analogous.
@@vikicarts1772 I don't know much about that type of lifestyle...but I know enough to understand fent. is a seriously deadly problem and it's mixed in all kinds of hard drugs... If I'm going to take a chance with anything, it's going to be in the naturally God given herbs actually put on this Earth for all to consume. I don't trust anything man has had his hand in making😬😐 Lol...noooo thanks.
@@vikicarts1772 true yo. Brown dope usually is lighter brown these days. Sometimes white specks
@@gurumayne8684 thank god fetty doesn’t seem to have made its way to the U.K. yet. If anyone is going to dabble get on the onions. However if someone is living on the street it’s highly unlikely they will have access and funds to get the pure brown. Yet another kick in the teeth for people who live in poverty.
I wonder if the reason he hasn’t found what he’s supposed to do in life is because life wants to see him sober first???
On target. Wise. We all need to read this comment amd take it to heart. Peace!
I think some people never find it sober or not
Love this idea...you may be the key to the lock I've yet been able to open, thank you so much for your wonderful insight. You are truly a blessing to those you encounter on a daily basis, and we should all be so lucky as to recieve your clear, concise, and to the point wit. And no, I'm not being a smartass...I'm as serious as I've ever been. And when I get what I feel is a good idea, watch out, because I take it to the extreme and finish strong, and now I have a rock solid reason to give the other side it's fair shake. Know of the good you've done here, ( and a million other places I'm sure).I know I know...my punctuation is terrible and I'm seriously reckless with commas and run ons
@@christianphillips7788 It worked for me. The brain isn’t motivation toward long term goals during addiction, no matter what kind of person you are. The part of the brain involved in planning and decision making is seriously damaged by addictive use & comes back only with abstinence. True story. Read “Understanding Addiction: Know Science, No Stigma,” by Dr. Chuck Smith and Dr. Jason Hunt. You will see that your inability to “find yourself” during addiction is not your fault. The addiction is not your fault. And your brain will go back to how it was, if you abstain long enough, maybe better!
He’s smart, he’s going to get out if he just goes for it. Wish you the best of luck Christian!
He is very very smart, but I think he is wrong about some people are meant to be homeless. We all make a choice to do things.
@@earlenehutchins8726 Thats how opiates speak to u eventually, kind of eat at all your self worth.
Doing nothing is a common trait with some geniuses. If he is telling the truth it makes alot a sense.
This was a video about disclosure.... 100% of what I've stated is true
Takes some balls to run out of that house, knock on a stranger's door, and call the cops at 13. Props to him, he saved a lot of other people.
Several children came forward and a string of abuse at a church was uncovered and stopped which makes it, to me anyway, worth it having happened to me
@@christianphillips7788 well you have a lot bigger balls than me, I'll prob take mine to the grave... It was a family member so makes it a little different, or I'm just making excuses for being a wimp ha. You're right, you saved a lot of people, what a champ! How r u doing today? I can relate a lot to u, my mind is a chaotic mess, but strangely I have found stability in my life (I own a home, have a stable job, and am married). I hope you can find peace and stability... You can do it and you deserve it.
@@christianphillips7788 Wow, that’s quite an accomplishment, to your credit. I know what you mean. Everything I’ve gone through will be worth it, if I can help others in a significant way, because of it. You’re a very compassionate person. That’s a huge strength, as long as we don’t let others walk on us, but you didn’t just fall off the turnip truck.
I thought I was just doing drugs and alcohol for fun and I could take it or leave it and get sober when ever I wanted. When I tried to get sober is was impossible and a million times harder then I could have ever imagined! Now coming up on 2 years 8 months it’s worth the struggle. Hope and miracles is what I live for! Hope you get it soon Christian!
CONGRATULATIONS Luv !!!!🎉❤🎊💯💪🏽
Right on man!
@@gailgarcia8782 thank you kindly!
@@dirtypatwalsh thanks Mr. Dirty lol 😂
Good for you!
As a child he was put into too many situations that caused predators to violate him PARENTS watch your kids like life depends on it CAUSE IT DOES😔
You need to watch the boogeyman is real. Soft white underbelly. That's the title of the video. Older black dude. Watch it
@@cashusclay69able yes I have and commented on both his videos I’ve been with SWU since I first saw Jerry’s first video RIP Jerry😔
About 2 years ago me and my crew saw a heroin addict walking by extremely happy across the street... as you may know the H rule (if a junkie is happy , he has heroin money on him).
Long story short we jump him , knock him down and rob him cold. He got 220 euros.
About 6 months later he commit suicide.
The point is I still laugh about it like it was yesterday. I mean I felt sorry for who ? A junkie?
We saw her sister about a week ago.... I try to smash her but she said no... I told her about her brother plus I say "if he was here 30 times I would smash him again 30 times, nobody even like him" and she cry a lot and started shaking.
The point is some of us are the bad guys of the stories and WE DONT GIVE A FLYING F*CK ABOUT IT , WE STIL LAUGH ABOUT THE INJURIES WE DONE.
I bet your mom is proud of you. What a horrible philosophy of life you have, I will definitely pray for you.
@@lindaphillips5768 are you talking about me ? Linda pray for yourself I don't need NOONE to pray for me... hold your stupid prayers for yourself
“It didn’t make you gay or anything like that?”
“Interesting”
Mark, come on now, what was that
You're thinking too hard Christian. You know in your heart what you need to do. 💖 If you wait for the right moment youll be waiting forever
So sweet
So true
♥️♥️♥️♥️
Mark, ‘make you gay’ Dude you know better than that… I still love you….
I heard him say that and shook my head...such an ignorant thing to say, Mark 🙄😒
He asked a legitimate question.
Anyone coming down on Mark for this needs to understand that not all gay people were completely born that way. There have been countless examples of people being molested and traumatized into a life of sexual confusion and continued immortality until they heal and realize they aren’t simply gay and suppressed.
K Vato so in other words, you’re talking about people who aren’t actually gay….
Agreed, pretty weird thing to say. I guess maybe he meant more by that and didn't go into it, like others have mentioned maybe mentioning the specific trauma could have made him question his sexuality more than he would have without it. But "made you gay" just sounds ignorant of the way these things actually work.
He is very articulate and self aware. I love his vibes, keep pushing, find your thing Christian.
You are in denial about how heroin dictates your life. Truth is you are just a successful thief. You are just making excuses for your time on skid row. You are better than this.
I feel like he has ADHD I’m not sure if it’s just in my head because I was recently diagnosed at the age of 30. Feel like I can relate so much to him it’s like your brain is always on overdrive you can never relax it’s overwhelming. People with ADHD also have a hard time thinking about the Consequences, here now in the moment kind of people. Whatever is going on I wish you the best of luck you can get sober and live a life Beyond what are you even imagine.
😢
very possible. He could be also Bipolar. but he's pretty hyper .
I agree with this having adhd myself.
From two minutes in I was completely captivated. This dude reminds me so much of myself. Too smart for our own good, excellent relationship with our parents, brains on overdrive that H helped level out, interest in everything, rich life stories, we’re writers, we’re story tellers, similar outlook on life that there’s no regrets - just lessons learned, living a buck wild life… I’m sure there’s more.
As much as that intrigues me it terrifies me at the same time. I identify with not knowing where I belong or what I’m supposed to be doing with my life because I’m so deeply entranced with everything. Mark was right though, you just have to pick something and do it. Luckily I figured that out.
Hopefully this gentleman also does before he wakes up at 50 in the same spot.
If I were him, I’d be keeping a journal every day of life out there and after a few years try to get that published. Clearly everybody is fascinated with these types of stories, that’s why we’re here on this channel, so there’s definitely a market for it.
Christian if you’re reading this - DO IT DUDE! I’ll help edit it. The saddest thing in life is wasted potential. Please don’t let that be you.
♥️
Real humble and modest aren't you? 🙄
H doesn’t ‘level’ out lol
I enjoyed reading your comment and well said , I appreciate your words and hope it hits home for christian as it’s always nice too hear a similar story with you saying he can too and don’t leave it till to late . I 100% agree and wish the same for him 2 🙏❤️ fifi
I think maybe you need to just be🤷♂️ although I enjoyed and appreciated your comment, I wonder if you might find some solace in moving your focuses away from yourself. All the best to you
parent** or mom***
My brother just overdosed today. Luckily he is fine, since his fiancé found him before anything terrible happened. She called off the wedding and I am pretty sure he is going to go right back to using because of this.
I have been clean personally for just under two years. I work out now, have two kids with my beautiful wife. I wish I could just shake him and tell him to snap out of it but it is not that easy. I pray for anyone going through addiction. It takes a lot out of you. Mentally, physically, and especially spiritually. Love you all.
We love you too and I’m praying for your brother
Man it’s so tough, really hope your brother can beat the demon somehow. My brother is in a very similar situation, and I just don’t know what to do to help him anymore, he has to want it for himself. It’s just impossibly hard to watch people destruct their lives when you love them
@@Day-ZDuke I agree with an addict will with when they truly want to quit. I guess just be there for him, but don't enable his addiction like giving him money or rides to get something.
Also ask him or tell him about kratom. I use it daily and it curbs my addiction to heroin amazingly. Has been a life saver for me.
🧐 ☺️🥲
@@patrickdabson3650 Kratom has really helped me, also!
« It didn’t make you gay or anything »
What kind of questions are you asking sometimes mark seriously…..
So this is tough but I am Christians brother. I grew up in the same shitty trailer park and lived with the same bullies and jerkoffs that he had to deal with as a kid. I was almost sexually abused like he was but I got out of there because it didn’t seem ok to me but being so young I wasn’t sure why and I wish I knew better to help him out at that age. We started doing drugs near the same age and we hung in a lot of the same circles. I can vouch for him and tell you all that these stories are all true. The thing that’s super tough for me is in the entire interview he didn’t mention the family he disappointed and left behind in Virginia. He has two wonderful, smart, and extremely loving nephews that he doesn’t call, he doesn’t write especially since that’s his thing, and worst of all being from a single parent home doesn’t want to know because “he didn’t ask us to have kids.” His biggest regret is not doing something with his life! It’s laughable. He had so much potential but his work ethic sucked and he would have no issue fucking you over in a heart beat. I tried to get him clean and he ran off to LA to live in a tent because it makes him happy. So that bullshit about him wanting to be shot if he is still there in five years is either true because it’s a horrible existence and waste of a lifetime or he is lying to us and himself and can’t come to terms with the things he’s done to people that love him and tried to help. I’m not sure what else to say other than Christian I love you but you are 41 and while there might not be a relationship for us in the future you need to get off the dope and put your work boots on and make something of yourself. This video makes me so angry knowing your out there continuing this lifestyle of drugs and stealing in the same breath that your telling people to be kind to each other. Your literally stealing from people and causing trouble. How hypocritical of a statement is that. Do better!
Don't know if you're for real but your story fits with his
He said "I don't want to put my heart and soul into something that is not what I'm supposed to be doing"... But doing drugs is 100% not something that you are supposed to be doing, but still you have wasted so many years on doing it...
If you ever get to read my comment:
You are extremely intelligent, interesting, self aware and good looking guy. It's not too late for you, so stop lying to yourself and get some help. The longer you keep doing what you are doing, the smaller is the chance to see the "exit" that you are looking for.
You know that. You are not a guy who doesn't understand how it works, you don't need or have to figure it out because you know the answer.
Think about your mother and about yourself and take a chance to see how it feels to be on the other, sober side.
You got this.. !
I would love to see some update on his story and I hope he will try to get sober.
Crossing my fingers and praying for him!
This guy has the ability to go out and teach others about his life. He's got a brilliant way of speaking thoroughly. I'd love to see him do a part two.
Damn. I feel like this dude can do great things if he set his mind to it. He’s super intelligent, ambitious, and self motivated. He could either be homeless and at the mercy of other individuals giving, or he could be a millionaire. It’s literally just up to him make those things happen
Ok Christian. Another 5 yrs on skid row? How about 5 weeks or months instead? The time clock starts now. Are you serious about "shoot me"? If so just leave skid row now and DO SOMETHING. Enough of the Hamlet routine. Such a waste of obvious potential.
I do think that Mark’s question may be taken as offensive (asking Christian if the abuse made him gay) but I think he’s asking it because that’s a common misconception people have with boys who are molested and he wants to dispel that stereotype
"Treat people with kindness". When you "boost" (STEALING is the actual word), you are treating the store owner like shit, not with kindness. Look in the mirror dude.
Exactly your a common thief
I really like this guy...he has a positive attitude. He could do anything with that outlook. Unfortunate he is still looking for his PURPOSE.
I hope he finds it soon or the H will take every ounce of positivity from him.
Having a mission and doing nothing is simply an EXCUSE to stay on drugs and live an irresponsible life. Talking, talking, talking…….doing nothing. Get some help!!!!
Exactly 💯
Christian bro you’re a strong guy. Keep pushing, don’t give up. You have so much more to offer man. You can do it. Don’t ever give up my friend
Hi life is very short be careful
You will run out of time to enjoy xx
People who don't want to recover always speak of it so simply... his grace period all depends on if he gets that heavily fentynal laced product that's taking everyone out
Wow dude tbh with you I think you do have a gift either writing or talking to people there is something about you that really captivates the audience! I was hooked on this one from the start!!! I believe you've experienced so many things that you have so much to share!!! Great video guys!!!
I fear he will waste his life if he doesn't do something soon.
I instantly like this guy! He seems smart and very expressive. I hope you can get his life together and get out of Skid Row.
Full of excuses and will soon be a statistic
I know, Mark, that you do not have time to read comments, but in case you see this: you inspire people.
First of all he looks like he could be your cousin, Mark 😂
To me he is speaking his truth and I truely believe he can get through this. Would love to see what happens in the near future with him. Try and manifest your talents and watch for the signs, sometimes it's right infront of us.
I wish you all the best. ✌️
“It didn’t make you gay?” Mark, what kind of question is that?! 😡
I think he asks that to try and dispel the stereotype that people have about boys who are molested :/
A good question, just the question I wanted to ask myself.
@@isabellaangelipahim9660 why..? Asking questions I bad how?
Christian, quit waiting for things to HAPPEN to you; make things HAPPEN FOR YOU. You haven’t hit bottom yet, but it’s coming, that’s for sure. Get busy.....
Seems like another person self-medicating purely to get through this type of world in which we all live. I hope he makes it out alive and finds what it ever it is he was supposed to be.
What a wonderful guy!
Wish he'd see his value!
Prayers out to LA skid row.
How is stealing everything you have "wonderful?" You probably think governments are wonderful too.
@@JetSkiSuper7 "Dealt with accordingly" is a Blanket term. If "dealt with accordingly" means by political ends; that part to which we lend ourselves is far worse than any form of individual irresponsibility that we've seen here.
@@JetSkiSuper7 Try to think of yourself as an individual rather than just part of the collective. It is that collective thinking that created the "fucking scum" you hate.
@@JetSkiSuper7 Do you think Christian would practice his trade (electrician) if there were no laws against him doing so acting as an individual? I know he would have, but YOUR laws, YOUR police have convinced him he should not, that it is "illegal" and therefore he is bad to even think he could do such a thing without permission... You have lost your individuality and assisted in taking his in the process.
@@JetSkiSuper7 You still example no comprehension of cause and effect.
This guy won't be alive in 10 years to remember all the great times he had shooting dope in a tent on skid row. Good luck.
Wow.....just..... 😲.....small minds beget small understandings
Christian, if you were to take a poll by asking a question on here, I believe very few people ever got that clear sign: THIS is what your Career needs to be. I am 60 this year and have had 2 companies, 3 careers not which I would have guessed at 21. But I get you too because I also believe in signs.
So here is YOUR SIGN! Get sober. Make a leap and if necessary build wings on the way down. You can succeed!!! Go for it!!!!
I totally feel you when you say that you feel "stuck" because you don't know which way to take your life or which passion to follow. I find that I get so overwhelmed by the thought of making the wrong decision that I get frozen and end up not choosing anything. I was waiting for the longest time for the "perfect" thing to come along I would just know that was my thing, but it didn't happen. Instead I've decided to pick something and just roll with it. I'm hoping that somewhere along the way ill figure it out or ill be able to apply my skill to something I didn't realize was my passion. I think its easy for people to say "just do it" but I think it comes down to having a good support system and having people that encourage you and help you along the way. I could see you doing something with social justice or politics. I too believe we should do things for the greater good and I could see you applying that passion to making the world a better place. I have been sober from alcohol and pills for 8 years and I understand how hard it is to deal with the emotions you have been repressing with the drugs. Waking up everyday sober and with a purpose in life is everything. I hope you are able to break the cycle and find your purpose, you deserve it :)
“Not making a decision is making a decision.”
-Some wise person
I think you’ve got a good plan! I hope you find it. I finally have, and it took a long, long time, but now, if G_d or the universe is willing, I have a plan. 🤩
Someday hopefully before I leave this Earth, I hope to see better protection for children from all abuse, especially sexual, that steals the innocence that children deserve to have. Why abusers never consider the life long pain and psychological challenges they cause. I think I know the answer: if you don’t consider anyone but yourself, you just simply don’t care what you do. We are all connected. The pain you cause another gets placed on them, then they place it on someone else, then society and this is the ills collectively we suffer. It is like a pebble in the water that causes so many ripples.Bless you all and stay in a higher vibe, for you and others that you share the world with 🤍☮️🙏🌎⭐️
I feel for this man I do. But " I can't spend 10 years trying to be a lawyer come to find out I'm supposed to be a writer" ommmmg that hit me hard and it was little funny I'm sorry. But I feel it!
“It didn’t make you gay or anything?” Dude… I know these interviews are supposed to be like organic conversations but that’s such a messed up way of phrasing that.
Mark's question was perfect. There are people, boys and girls who have been sexually abused by the same sex that turn towards the same sex for sexual relationships later. Often even though it was traumatic for them, they had a sense of being close or cared for. Now can you see why it wasn't such a strange question. I've worked with children who this happened to and later on in their lives looked for love/sex from the same sex.
I mean he could have worded it differently but what does that do?
@@peacefulwife5199 I think sexuality and trauma affecting it are far too complicated for such a simplistic phrasing. I think it's a terrible question that doesn't really get across what it's asking in an honest way.
What an emotionaly strong person
High as a kite on H, yes, one is.
Not really, he needs hard drugs to make it through the day.
I hear you.
You are genuinely a beautiful man. You're so intelligent. Insightful. You're handsome and well spoken. You're so strong. You have SO MUCH potential. You deserve more than living on the streets of skid row.
Please leave that place before it swallows your soul.
You're self medicating. You don't need to luv.
You have so much more to offer the world. Your mother needs a hug. Break the cycle.
I hope he sees this. ❤️
Beautiful worlds 👏
@Mark Laita, your videos are being posted on tiktok and to someone who didn't k ow better, they'd think the videos belong to the tiktoker and are completely unaware that they belong to you.. sorry lol just wanted to make sure you knew! You work hard on these and deserve the credit
@Soft White Underbelly Did you give permission for someone to post your work on TikTok. Is SWU on TikTok?
No, it’s very frustrating. I can’t get help from tiktok.
What a HOOT! Christian, please please go get sober and make your dreams come true!! You are a genius!!! Make it happen !!! I hope Mark follows you!! Good luck to you..…. You can do this!!!
Sounds like you have a great mom. Maybe suboxone would help you?
I would say pick anything because anything is better than being a heroin addict and on skid Row
Exactly
@ 19:40 "What I'm supposed to be doing."
The enemy of the good is the perfect.
That's the barrier for most people with high IQs.
And it can be a killer.
Just get moving, or you will certainly get run over.
This guy reminds me so much of a former friend of mine. I'm no psychologist but the way this guy acts I'd be willing to bet he's Bipolar type 1 like my former friend. I wish I could say current friend as he's a good person and is one of the most interesting people I've ever known but at a certain point the obvious lies and stealing got to a point that was unbearable. I wish Christian and my former friend all the best and I hope they find their paths to happiness and health.
Totally agree! I used to self medicate then found out I was bipolar when I got sober and felt worse! Now I’m medicated and feel for him because I remember that whole spinning head shit. It still happens but nowhere as bad now. I hope ur friend is well ♥️
He looks like Mark if he ever done heroin
I was sexually abused by my father growing up and I can relate to you 💯 percent about being sexually awkward. You said that and I was like "Ding, ding, ding!" Right on the money... It sucks man!
So very sorry you had to experience that...
I'm so glad he put that molester in jail
Christian, hi 😊 I totally jump from one subject to another just like that!!! It's my norm! You're awesome and I hope you get better soon! You're an awesome person and I can't wait to see you when you find what your purpose is, I know you'll figure it out! 😊
Mark’s point was conveyed but not fully understood. By ‘Do Anything’ his suggestion is the you choose Something and pursue it to it’s natural conclusion. When you choose nothing you’re a Cop Out - Just someone who tells themselves stories about how great they can be but all they are is a petty street thief.
Commit to Something. This requires you to stop BSing yourself and the world and sit down EVERYDAY in the public library and write for 2 hours. After a month you’ll certainly be clear if you have a gift or not.
Get clean, that’s what you’re supposed to do
He said he could wire a house by himself why doesn’t he start studying to be an electrician. At least a journeyman..
Mark, the question "it didn't make you gay" is ridiculous. Nothing "makes" people gay, they are born that way.
But it can fuck up your head thinking your suppose to be
Look at his eyes.
You can see the deep sadness inside.😓
He protestseth too much. Of how happy he is.
😔
He's a very intelligent guy. I feel an unusual amount of fondness for him-- probably because he reminds me of my sister a bit. Wish you the best Christian !
If you don’t know 100% what you should do, help others to fulfill their purpose, take care of others. It is a great waitingroom.
Go into treatment
You are in decision-paralysis and just need to pick something and do it well like managing the restaurant. Once you do that it will help you get clean THEN you can figure out what you really want to do. Stop taking the easy road and get your ass off skid row and come back in a year and show us what you're capable of.
Thanks for sharing your story, bless your mum for leaving your dad to protect you, Sorry to hear at 6 how your “ grooming was just so calculated “ parents need too talk to their kids super early unfortunately as these low life’s just are so cunning at how they go about it !! I wish you all the best , your just a beautiful soul . I love how you embrace the good, bad and ugly 🙏❤️Fifi
I understand his problem about choosing the path that’s best when he is so capable in so many ways. I know that some people have found the right path by asking the universe daily to show them what to do. In time, it becomes apparent.
When I die I hope that the universe is not there to meet me. Just saying.
You just gotta go out there and try different things. The worst decision is to stay stagnant and do nothing. Always do SOMETHING. Eventually you end up right where life intended.
@@kristineplummer7607 p
Good luck,...
He has so much potential. If he is this intelligent high then sober he is a genius. I would love to hear him sober. Excited for that day with another interview update.
"I've wasted 40 years trying to figure out what to do" - I'm so afraid of this being me 14 years down the line. Sobering stuff.
Hence the entire point of this channel... examples of what NOT to do.
If you're wasting time thinking of things to do you'll end up doing nothing.
I think that this gentleman is afraid to succeed I believe I feel the same way about myself I purposely sabotaged or don't pull the trigger on things because with success comes responsibility living in a tent and doing dope all day is the most least responsible you can do that's why I did the same thing without living in a tent for many years I relate to this man and I wish him all the best
Afraid of success yes
I could listen to Christian for hours. Interesting guy!
Before you know it , you will die in a tent on skid row! So damn intelligent and so damn scared of success. 😪
✌💞🤗 Get out , before you can't . Just leap off the Static belt of the Universe & land on another . You'll know what to do. Good luck with your life .
I pray he gets the help he really needs.
To the person reading this: Even though I don’t know you, I wish you the best of what life has to offer.
I do not want want life has to offer but thank you anyway.
I prefer to pursue what I want in my life.
Thx you. I wish the same for you my kind hearted friend!
"It didnt make you gay or anything like that?" Huh? Since when does sexual abuse "make" someone gay?
Yeah, super dumb question from a guy who knows better than to ask that.
I've seen it mess with people's sexual orientation a bit, or at least questioning as he alludes to.
@@a.wanderer5006 this suggests that beeing gay is something you become, and I dont belive that's the case when it comes to sexuality.
@@snyggsarahh There's a great article about it, online.
' The "gay gene" is a myth, but being gay is natural' Say scientists.
@@snyggsarahh Yes the 'born gay' thing was very important to gaining civil rights for gay people but sexual abuse creates confusion in one's sexual expression sometimes. You'll also observe sexual abuse victims are either extremely promiscuous or extremely conservative/prudish and sometimes oscillate between the two throughout their life. Sexual abuse really screws up people's feelings about sex and attraction, in a myriad of ways.
What a bright man. Get well soon, Christian; your heart was clearly always in the right place but the circumstances were totally unfair.
@PeopleAreOutOfPlace Boosting isn't theft, or theft isn't wrong anymore; Prevailing core myths are tough to overturn. Most people resist discussing them. No one discusses it here. We resist differentiating right from wrong. We abdicate our personal responsibility to others, to anyone. We act as if we are still good. Pathetic.
If we believe ourselves to be good persons, yet display ignorance to moral and ethical responsibilities, or have worse yet become part of the crime itself, we need to re-examine ourself. There's a disconnect there somewhere. Either we aren't as good as we thought, or we are seriously out of place.
Can't waste ten years.. .. been on skid row for four years...very interesting guy I wish I had one third of his energy. He thinks too much just goes round and round in circles. Smart but can't focus. Not so smart.
This guy is so engaging and interesting. It seems as though he could probably do anything he wanted to if he could just stay focused. Adderall would undoubtedly another addiction but he seems like there's just one thing that needs to be tweaked in that big brain to let him have the life he deserves. I'm going to pray for Christian, that he comes in contact with what he needs to be sober and get his brain to be calm.
Updates would be welcomed, Mark.
I watched this one whole. Smart guy, doesn't deserve that. Hope you decide you're done sooner than later. It took the life of the closest person in my life.
20:50 - potential by itself is worth nothing. If you dont know for what you were made for, you have to keep trying. doing nothing as a justification to avoid searching for your passion for 10 years , will result in 10 years o self discovery thrown away.
This is fear taking over, dont do this, keep searching
Christian, thank you for one of the most fascinating stories I’ve ever heard on this channel, you do you dude.
He’s one of the smartest guys you have interviewed so far. Hope he finds his purpose in life and fulfill his goals. I would love to see you make a follow up with him.
This gentleman’s story is touching. So sorry to hear about those early memories, how horrible.
seems like hes self medicating for bipolar since he said hes manic a lot, and dont fully realise the trauma. maybe he can get on lithium wich has helped my friend in psychiatry who had bipolar disorder also he was a junkie too
Imagine being a local shopkeeper and having to deal with this guy visiting your shopto fill up his sack with loot every day
Yet, CA kept Newsom who passed the Law saying if you steal less than $1,000 in any one trip, the store won’t even stop you. I struggle to cope with people who think laws like that are a good idea, but it is their State, so if wholesale theft is the way they want it, it is no skin off my nose 3,000 miles away. I AM surprised at any business owner who opts to stay open in LA and San Fran. Again, if they don’t mind, I shouldn’t either.
Makes me so mad..stealing or looting is not an art!
@@annieseaside That is a horrible law. I feel for businesses trying to make it in CA.
Ex user, been on a low does of methadone for about 5 years. It's probably the only thing that has kept me away. I'm trying now the past two months and have drastically reduced my intake of methadone. I have a desire to use heroin everyday practically but know that it's a bad idea. This man is 41? Has been a junkie for basically 20 years if not longer and he looks 33-35. Most alcoholics at that age already look like shit no need to mention meth. Heroin is terrible and it kills so many people, but there are things worse and alcohol is one of them. Like him the only reason I ever started using was because of two unsuccessful surgeries on my wrist. It is broken currently, I live with that pain everyday. It also took me many years to move from pain killers to heroin. I had stopped for several years and when I started again pills were harder to get and prices had sky rocketed. Ive had longer periods of sobriety then him and currently have no intention of using. I hope he makes it through his journey I hope he has a happy ending to his beautiful yet extremely painful life. When you find the power to change everyday will still be a struggle, I hope he has it in him. Sometimes I second guess myself.
Very honest humble dude , respect to this man hope
He gets thru this rollercoaster we call life god bless brother
It's time to walk the talk, dude.
You won't know what you're supposed to do until you start trying things, even if you waste some time you get closer to knowing what you really are supposed to be doing. And you learn along the way.
Pick something and just go with it. It may lead to that thing you’re looking for. If you never try anything looking for that perfect thing it may pass you by and you may miss your opportunity.