See I think this lyric has a different meaning. I think we are supposed to have different purposes and are completely different from the white American boy she is talking about. The lyric “but awake at night I’ll be singing to the birds” says she is darkness.
“your mother wouldnt approve of how my mother raised me.. but i do, i think i do?” but i do, i FINALLY do.” korean american, asian household, immigrant mother, this slapped me across the face
This song brings me comfort in knowing I'm not crazy when I pose the question "why am I good enough for you to lust after, to comfort you, to love you but when the lights come on you dissapear because who would approve?"
I don't know if you've ever heard Mitski'd other song called "Liquid Smooth" but it hits just as hard as this one because Liquid Smooth very much sounds like it's coming from the perspective of a WOC who knows what it's like to only be seen as beautiful when being fetishized by others.
being a 1st gen woc with strict and toxic parents this song just hits me in the heart, i just want to experience fun relationships with guys or girls like most my age are, i feel so left out, all i do is stress over online school, clean the house 24/7, cry, sleep, eat and that's it? i wish i could be normal and pretty enough for people to want me, i grew out of my white validation phase thankfully, but part of me is still holding on, i just want someone to make me feel loved without me having to change myself to fit the damn beauty standard
We live the same life. I think the best thing we can tell ourselves is that we’re not alone, and that our time will come, we shouldn’t rush into anything. Remember that your worth is not based on how many partners you have.
This song makes me think of my mom. She's a brown woman from Cuba married to a white American man. They're rrly in love, but their cultures and personalities clash. She almost cried the other night because we don't have any family traditions, because my dad's family really doesn't, and she grew up with a lot of family traditions that she treasures.
Yeah my mom is Korean American and my dad is white. I feel like my mom had to whitewash and Americanized her kids so that we wouldn’t face discrimination like she went through. I really wish I celebrated and knew more about my culture.
@@starface66 I understand this. my mother is Indian/Japanese and she is so whitewashed because of my white father and wanting to be seen as white. I wish she would stop dying her hair blonde every week and stop talking about wanting to get rid of her on ethnic features and showed me more about my culture, traditions, religion.
I remember how much I wanted to be white in 5th grade, both of my parents were immigrants and didn’t “act American” and I resented that part of me for a long time.
When I was little I had an entire plan to become white. Bleach my skin, straighten my hair, dye my hair blonde, get plastic surgery on my eyes so they were blue. I was 7.
i remember looking in a mirror and crying because i could never be pretty because i could never be white. i remember only drawing white princesses even though i don’t have white skin. i remember being shocked when my cousin drew a princess with dark skin, i didn’t know dark skinned princesses were a thing. i remember being insecure about the hair on my body. i remember being pushed to shave my body hair. i remember feeling too masculine no matter what i did. i remember finding all of my middle eastern features the ugliest things about me. i never knew this was a shared experience among other poc and woc. comments like yours as well as this song have given me an overwhelming feeling of validation.
@@elisnovat3955 First off, people can read whatever they want into art. That's the whole point. Why make art if other people aren't going to interpret it for themselves? If you don't agree with other people's interpretations, fine, but don't be a dick about it, dude. Second, this is what Mitski herself said in a Wired article: "I was in love with somebody, but I just felt like our backgrounds or the places we come from or how we were raised were so completely different. And it felt like something that couldn't be overcome by love." I'd say that's very much about the struggles of 1st generation immigrants...
@@elisnovat3955 What the fuck? Mitski does indeed talk about what her songs mean, and she has literally talked about the fact that this song is about cultural differences impacting a relationship. I don't understand how you can HEAR her sing about "the way her mother raised her" and then say this is not about race. The fuck? Whatever, if you're incapable of listening to the goddamn lyrics, see www.npr.org/sections/allsongs/2016/03/01/468690106/new-mix-music-from-m-ward-nothing-marissa-nadler-a-chat-with-mitski-more?.com&?.com&#playlist and www.npr.org/2016/06/19/482375750/mitski-on-puberty-2-and-the-nature-of-happiness Also, I don't read a "victim complex racism issue" in the OP. Sit the fuck down.
Elis Novat For someone who accuses others of projecting, you sure get overly defensive and make a lot of assumptions about other people’s personal traits lmao
I'm a half-asian guy. As a kid growing up I used to be embarrassed by my Chinese mother's ways and second-language English. I've since 180'd and kinda wish I was more Chinese, super proud to be half. This song is great; love to all the women out there and people in general with whom this song resonates. You don't need "fixing."
Felt this 100%, kinda scary how similar this is to my experiences, with the embarrassment phase and then wanting to be more "asian" and all (though the asian part was mainly for my mom's approval). Great to see that you've since accepted yourself, hope you're doing well now man
to all of my immigrant daughters & woc reading this- i know how hard it is and how much you might be hurting as you listen to this song but please know i love you so so much
I feel so guilty when i listen to this song, i’m a 2nd generation Mexican American but i feel so whitewashed like i don’t feel Hispanic enough for my own culture, but at the same time i’m not white enough for the US
i know a lot of people interpret this song to be about being in love with/in a relationship with someone and feeling alienated because of your culture/upbringing, but to me this song makes me think of growing up and thinking this exact way about everyone, especially friends. i always felt embarrassed and ashamed of how i was raised and tried to hide it around my american friends. i wish i was actually strong enough to get to the point where i can say "you mother wouldn't approve of how my mother raised me but i do i finally do." it's so hard to actually accept and love who you are when everyone around you makes you feel so different
“You have so much to do and I have nothing ahead of me” hit hard as someone that was always behind in classes and never left the house. Watching people grow older and get friends whilst I’m just standing still. I’ve always been standing still and I find it comforting knowing that I won’t get anywhere in life.
a half japanese half white woman who is from america made this song. (ik she was born in japan, but she wasn’t raised there, and i’m pretty sure she’s in america now which is a struggle being poc) it’s amazing. the feeling of being a poc but feeling distant from both sides, and not fitting into the standards of america.
@@maya-ci2py well, immigrant poc. Because if someone is poc and grew up surrounded by other poc I don't think they would be able to relate (for example a japanese woman who has spent her entire life in her home country)
@@Otra_Chica_de_Internet yes but this could also be about dating a white man as a poc, and not being approved because of it and trying to be like his past girlfriends who were the same as him.
It makes me sad knowing that I’ll never fit his beauty standards, not just his but any boys beauty standards. They always choose the white girls, and they don’t even know how lucky they are. Then some of them complain about being brunette instead of having blonde hair, imagine being a 1st Gen immigrant :/
Dogmo Satchmo Oh man, just as glad as you are too. I wouldn’t be able to handle it either, had it come out at a time that I miss so much and wish I can go back to relive my childhood again. :’(
Her going from “I think I do” to “I finally do” and then back to “I think I do” is one the most heartbreaking parts of the song. Finally acknowledging what your mother does for you, especially as a WOC, then having it be taken away because of the “I wish I were white” phase hits too hard to home. I’m indigenous and I grew up seeing people make fun of my cultural music and dancing. I’ve seen my mother go through so many hardships, and I myself experienced similar racism and misogyny she did. It hurt so much to be ridiculed where I wished I was white, I wished I could be like the white girls in my class, beautiful blue eyes and blonde hair. I remember not being allowed to have blonde Barbie’s because of that. Thankfully now I have learned to love my culture, but it gets hard sometimes to deal with the racism from others.
i am sobbing. this hurts so much. as a latina, who's not white passing at all, my ex white bf cheated on me and left me for this white girl. she's gorgeous, she's so lovely to him with her perfect blonde hair and blue eyes why on earth did i think my brown eyes could ever compete with his. im crying so hard right now, why cant i just be someone like her,
Baby you are BEAUTIFUL. You are not accountable for your appearance, only for your heart. And his heart was not good. Remember that your eyes are the most beautiful honey in the sun, the rich soil of which beautiful green life bursts. your dark hair is the embers of which the fire of summer burns. It brings warmth and life to the smile you carry. She is unique because she is her, and she is beautiful. But you are unique because you are not her. You are yourself. And that is the most beautiful person you can be. My Instagram is olivialikespuppets if you ever need to talk.
he's missing out. you are absolutely beautiful, no less than that other girl, and you do not deserve to feel bad about the way that you look. if he was willing to cheat on you he didn't deserve you in the first place; you're too good for him. i hope the pain gets better soon and i hope you know that you're absolutely gorgeous and there are wonderful people out there who will see that and love you :)
that is his loss!! YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL AND HE DOESNT DESERVE U WHATSOEVER!! EMBRACE WHO U ARE CUZ UR AMAZING!! although im just a kid and dont rlly have that much experience in the world, just know u r loved! ^^
Words cannot describe how much I love this song. It encapsulates my experience as a WOC perfectly. The line "But big spoon, you have so much to do-and I have nothing ahead of me" hits so hard. It is so hard growing up as a WOC and not seeing anybody who looks like you in movies and pop culture in general. The standard is white, American individuals. In movies, the heroes are always white. The villains are always foreign and darker-skinned. Nobody looked like me. As a Southeast Asian, it was hard growing up. Whenever there was Asian representation, most of it were East Asian people. And most of the time, those East Asian individuals would be the villain or painted out to be "mystical" and "oriental" with an exaggerated thick accent. If there was another WOC, many times they were sexualized or mocked. It was damaging and led me to believe that I could never be important; I could never be a hero. When I was a young child, I used to beg my mother to bleach my skin so I could fit in because I was bullied so badly in school for being different. For years, I refused to eat my grandma's cooking and begged for American food because that's what everyone else who was normal ate. I was always the only nonwhite kid in school. There was one Arabic kid but he would make fun of me with everybody else and he would allow himself to be made fun of, called "terrorist," and mocked his own family so he could fit in. I feel like so many POC feel like they are only worthy if they have white validation. Regardless, I grew up with the biggest inferiority complex. Growing up in a predominately white midwest area was extremely traumatic. I'm still here and still feeling like I don't belong. But songs like these and reading the comments section of this video makes me feel like I'm not alone. I've grown to love myself and, now, I want to do nothing but embrace my culture and surround myself with it. To my fellow WOC, you are 1000% valid and I love you so much. I wish you all happiness and I hope you all learn to accept and love yourself.
To any woc/nboc who has cried to this song I will gladly wipe up your tears !! You all deserve the world and I'm sorry if you have ever felt like you weren't even a star, you most definitely are the whole universe !! I love you !!
@@emoneslamian6757 hi hi!! I'm pretty sure this song is primarily directed towards women of color or afab people of color. I'm not exactly sure if it includes men of color but if any moc have cried to this song I will wipe up your tears as well!!
"well i'm not the moon, i'm not even a star" as an indigenous person, that lyric hit so close to my heart. i grew up on an indian reservation, which is on a very small island, and i've had limited access to the world outside from my community. but everytime i leave, i feel like im a part of some unknown world. i feel like an outsider, i just feel so different from the rest of the white ppl at my town school bc i never got the same experience that they did. ive always felt so in-between my indigenous community, and the mainstream society im not able to be apart of. somedays, i want to be a beautiful white boy with no problems in the world at all. id be rich, well-going and healthy. but also, i wanna stick to my culture sometimes, and be the "star" of my race. the attractive one, the ones you see on insta/tiktok everyday. i just dont know which character i wanna be, and it hurts so bad.
i love how the lyrics “your mother wouldn’t approve of how my mother raised me but i do, i finally do” and “i think i do” are right next to each other. i think it shows no matter how much you make a stance and be proud of who you are there’s always a voice in the back of your head doubting you’re good enough because of the people who’ve engraved that in your psyche.
this song reminds me of growing up in a predominantly white neighborhood. I wanted to have blonde hair and be pale like the others so maybe they would like me. A memory I have is my white friend telling me "I wish I wasn't so pale. I wish I had your tan skin tone" but I wanted to have her skin tone so badly.
I've noticed that people always want what they can't have, or don't have. I think a lot of that comes from how the beauty standards in America are constantly changing, yet so strict and demanding. When you give society what they want, they change their mind immediately after and want something else, which puts you in the dark again. It's impossible to keep up with and please, and it sucks. I want you to know though that tan skin like yours is very beautiful. All skin tones are, and you're just as worthy as the next person, whether they're pale or not. Don't ever try and change your features or hide your heritage because of what society tells you. It's society that has the issue, not you. The way POC are treated is terrible, and maybe one day you could use your experiences as a way to make a difference. I wish you the best, hun :)
yeah like in the uk you’re made fun of for being called pale and told to go outside and get a tan since it’s the standard and shows that you’re wealthy enough to go to holidays in the summer and get a tan / spray tan. of course not on the same scale as darker people have it but sadly the beauty standard will always put people down
i havent seen this response. i listen to this song when I really need it and I forgot i wrote that comment. I don't think i sobbed harder you're very lovely thank you. I've been feeling better about and honestly i really needed to see this. i wish u the best aswell. i wish i can express more but my hands are shaky haha @@Miss.Malibu
As a woc, this song hits so close to home. Being a mixed latina (indigenous and white) and not being white passing has had a huge impact on my life, Mitski’s music describes it perfectly. I’m so happy to see so many fellow woc connecting and relating to eachother in this comment section, not because of the experiences but because almost all of us have been through similar things and can support each other if that makes sense
I fell in love with a person with a completely different culture and upbringing to myself for the first time when I was 18, I knew it was doomed from the start but that didn't stop me falling for his autumn night eyes :(
Keep trying. Some white folks suck less than others. And for many of us, our best American girl is Asian, black or Latina. Fuck how our mothers raised us. They had their chance. Now its our turn. America is whatever the fuck we want it to be.
If I could, I'd be a little spoon And kiss your fingers forever more But big spoon, you have so much to do And I have nothing ahead of me You're the sun, you've never seen the night But you hear its song from the morning birds But I'm not the moon, I'm not even a star But awake at night I'll be singing to the birds Don't wait for me, I can't go Your mother wouldn’t approve/ Of how my mother raised me/ But I do, I think I do/ And you’re an all-American boy/ I guess I couldn’t help/ Trying to be/ Your best American girl. You're the one You're all I ever wanted I think I'll regret this Your mother wouldn’t approve/ Of how my mother raised me/ But I do, I finally do/ And you’re an all-American boy/ I guess I couldn’t help/ Trying to be/ The best American girl. Your mother wouldn’t approve/ Of how my mother raised me/ But I do, I think I do.
This song always hits me. My boyfriend is Chilean and I am Venezuelan, and his mother is against our relationship, reaching a point where we were on the verge of breaking up. I'm still with him, but we're going through the worst moment of our relationship. All thanks to his mom.
this song is so relatable it hurts. i can't even put it into words. it's like mitski grabbed my heart and the very essence of my soul and what it's been through and started singing it out loud. i'm crying i love you mitski
I've always dreamed to be pale, thin straight hair, a small nose and flat hips. I cry whoever I see my wide hips, dark skin, frizzy curls, and tall nose. I feel so gross. I hate being stuck in a republican town in the south. I haven't been to my homeland in three years. I just don't want to feel like I stand out anymore
Don't feel gross, the only truly gross thing is that republican town and the trump supporters you have to deal with lmao. The corruption of societal beauty standards should not define nor determine how attractive any woc is. What you may see as imperfections are actually gorgeous in so many ways yet too many people are programmed to think not since a lot of privileged society is ignorant and annoying as hell.
i just wanted to rant about how i relate to this song as a fully-bangladeshi girl // i grew up in a predominantly white neighborhood, and because of that, i've always felt insecure. exhibit A: i try to hide my arms because of my excessive body hair (relating to the lyric "and you're an all-American boy , I guess I couldn't help trying to be the best American girl") exhibit B: im always embarrassed because my family isn't as wealthy (relating to the lyric "but, big spoon, you have so much to do , and I have nothing ahead of me) exhibit C: i hide my parents from people because they don't raise me the same way others do (relating to the lyric "your mother wouldn't approve of how my mother raised me"). exhibit D: it hurts to hear people fight about "blondes or brunettes," when they've never even LOOKED at the direction of WOC (relating to the lyric "you're the sun, you've never seen the night , but you hear its song from the morning birds, well, I'm not the moon, I'm not even a star"). and so i ask, why do we always have to be ignored? why do people always have to be against us? i don't think ill ever get valid answers to those questions. so i think ill just embrace my culture instead.. and i say the same to my fellow people :)
I'm half Bengali. Sending love. I hope you're well. I hope you're happy. I hope that in the three years that have passed you've grown to accept who you are. I hope you're surrounded by people who love you for you.
As a white woman reading all the stories from WOC makes me sad, I know I will never understand your pain and frustration but I’m here to listen. That being said all the other white woman in the comments talking about not having “blonde hair, and blue eyes” you definitely missed the whole point of this song.😐
Everybody is going on about the lyrics, and don't get me wrong they are great, but can we talk about how tasty those drop D chords are? It's a big part of why this song hits so hard.
i had a line of this song’s lyrics on my lockscreen a few days ago, and my mom texted me telling me she looked the line up and ended up falling in love with Mitski’s songs. we took a late-night flight to Florida yesterday together and we shared airpods while listening to this song. it’s easily by far one of my favorite moments with my mom.
half a year later i just found this comment i made, lmao. proud to say we’re still avid mitski listeners :) edit; going to see her concert in february this year !!! 😭
“But big spoon, you have so much to do, and I have nothing ahead of me.” Hits terribly close to home when you are surrounded by people who have forced themselves through thick and thin to get where they are and you have to live with the guilt of constant failure
ive dealt with ocd, anxiety and now depression most of my life and i feel as if ill never be able to have real relationships because of my constantly crumbling mental condition. my first boyfriend lived in a world completely different from mine, he was american and had never had any severe mental illnesses or disorders (i am also from australia). his life was great until i entered it. he didn't know much about mental disorders and was afraid of mine for so long. it eventually tore our relationship apart because he felt pressured to take care of me. i dont love him romantically anymore, but i miss him as a friend. he hates me now and im afraid ill always feel like i cant show my real self to anyone because our worlds are too different. i used to listen to this song a lot as we started drifting apart. i never felt good enough for him, but now i realise that isnt healthy for a relationship. i hope he is having a really good life now. sometimes i feel like ill never be able to be apart of everyone elses world though. but reading comments on mitski songs makes me feel less alone, i know everyone in the world is struggling. i hope everyone can find happiness and can overcome their struggles. thank you mitski
I feel so weird listening to this song knowing I don’t relate to it in any way, but it somehow seems to comfort me. It’s an almost disgusting feeling, honestly
when i was in like first grade i came home crying that i wanted to be blonde with blue eyes, and that every pretty girl in my class was blonde with blue eyes. i’m asian. i wish i could go back and tell her that she is beautiful, and that she’s going to grow up into the most beautiful young woman and she doesn’t need blue eyes or blonde hair to do that.
I'm crushing on a yt boy, "you've never seen the night, but you hear it's song from the morning birds," reminds me of how he can do all he wants to be against racism and sexism, but he'll never know the real affect it can have on a person. Especially a person who's mourning the loss of a little girl and embracing someone else, better, but still mourning the loss of that girl.
this song reminds me of when i "fell in love" with this white dude and i whitewashed myself so much to just feel accepted by him (im a 1st gen asian) and it still didn't stop him and other boys from fetishizing me. like i had this one guy be my friend for a year solely for the purpose of getting "asian nudes" and this other guy tried to date me because of the asian girl stereotype (one time he was talking to his friend and he said, "see. asian girls are always so forgiving!") those boys left me for the "best american girl." white girls with eurocentric features: everything i will never be. on top of that, i'm filipino and i dont fit the asian beauty standard of porcelain skin, monolid eyes, small face, and slim figure. im slightly tan with hooded eyes, big arms, keratosis pilaris, and eye bags. i cant remember a single time ive seen a character that looked like me while i was growing up other than dora. so either way, it's hard for me to accept myself. :/
i’m first gen half filipino, and i’ve never truly felt asian because of how white washed i am and i don’t feel asian because i’ve been told so many times “you’re not really asian” it’s hard to fit in so i had to learn to love myself and i’m glad i did
me too!! i'm a first gen filipino-mexican person! i get teased by my family so much about how i'm white washed and stuff because i grew up in a predominately white neighborhood outside of the city i was born in. it's hard to flip back and forth from wanting desperately to be white and then wanting to remove yourself from the whiteness you grew up in :(
As someone who's mixed between white and arabic, i was about to comment something like this but i was aftraid people would think that i dont have any "real" struggles, so i am so happy i found your comment, i hope you have a great day and i relate to this so much
@@deidremmm I WAS EXACTLY ABOUT TO SAY THAT, like i feel terrible because my ex bsf was a poc and i ranted to her about trying to distance myself from my arabic side after my crush rejected me because of it, and i remember her facial expression when she said "at least u have the white too" and since then i havent really talked about any of my struggles because i felt so bad and like idk how to explain it but ur comment felt so relatable i just had to reply to it hah..
I can't speak my parents' language because was never taught it but I was expected to just know it or learn it on my own, I can't even find any good language videos or sites for it and google translate JUST got it last year but it still feels unreliable. It's frustrating because I'm teased for not knowing it >:/
I'm filipino chinese, I get you. We barely even celebrate chinese holidays anymore or we dont really love our culture as much. I feel so invalidated but I'm asian, and you are asian too. You cant erase that part of yourself
"Your mother wouldn't approve of how my mother raised me, but I do, I finally do" always makes me cry. I spent so long trying to be something I wasn't, trying to make myself fit this mold that only white women and white people in general could fit into. And when I was younger I went as far as trying to forget the culture I was raised in. I've always felt insecure as a Puerto Rican. Even though I know we're not the most discriminated against that never changed the way I saw the dirty glances I'd get if I were too loud or too proud of my heritage. Especially because of the fact I'm afab It took a lot for me to realize I am proud of myself, and that I should never be ashamed of myself.
I understand how you feel, im half Cuban half Puerto Rican and as a kid i wanted like nothing to do with my culture, I wanted to have white skin and straight blonde hair and blue eyes. I was always so frustrated that I didn’t measure up to the standard. I love my heritage so much, it means the world to me now. I’m still insecure about my looks, but ive begun to feel better about myself bit by bit as time goes on idk if you even care, but from one internet stranger to another, I get it
I agree, as someone who is questioning if I’m trans or not it completely encompasses the feeling of never being good enough for a man to love you.. or anyone really. It’s hard to pretend to be something you’re not or accept the fact of reality. This song just helps me feel like someone knows what I’m going through.
before I used to be embarrassed of my mom when she would speak with her Spanish accent and her customs from our country, the way she would be so considerate and affectionate to others that isn’t common in America. I used to feel embarrassed because of these things but now I’ve learnt to appreciate all these things she has taught me and how to develop as a person because I feel like the culture she passed onto me has a lot to do with how I am as a person. For that, I can now proudly say that I am Peruvian. This song resonates deeply with my experience as a young teen and the emotions I felt at that time.
this song reminds me of my mom and lowkey makes me so sad. she was a asian immigrant who came to america and was ridiculed for not knowing english, and she married a california american white man. the way she grew up was so accurate to this song.
This song has always had a different meaning for me. Despite its whole theme on race, the lines “you’re the one. You’re all I’ve ever wanted. I think I’ll regret this.” Have always stuck out to me. I was in love with a girl. We had a thing going for a while and I loved her dearly. But something always told me I would regret it. That it wouldn’t last. She was perfect. She was all I wanted. But sure enough, it’s caused me more heartache than anything else. We’re not together anymore, but I hope I can find someone where I know I won’t regret anything.
This song was sent to me by a guy once. He was my mom's friend son, this particular friend had a strict traditional way of parenting. My mother and other friends always felt bad for her kids, her son was a very good friend of mine and growing up I wasn't really affectionate nor interested in love. One night we were texting and he sent me this song with a lengthy message, turns out he liked me for years and thought I looked down on him because he didn't do well in school or because he was raised the old way. I was shocked to say the least, we met the next day and had a long conversation and I told him " I'm not going to tell you that I know what you're feeling but I am gonna tell you that you were always my best boy" he cried into my arms that day but he was happy and relieved in the end and that's what I care about ♡
"Your mother wouldn't approve of how my mother raised me, but I do, I finally do." I almost forgot how to speak Romanian because when I was younger and didn't speak much English I would get made fun of for it. So I completely stopped speaking my mother tongue once I learned English properly, now I'm trying to re-learn my own language. I brought traditional food to school for the first time a couple of months ago, it was such a big deal for me.
Another Romanian here! A few months ago, I changed my nationality to the one of the country I emigrated to (Spain) because it would make getting a job and other things easier. My parents were on board and assured me how it wouldn't change anything about me. But after actually doing it, I feel sad, it was like losing a part of myself. I used to like when other people told me "You've been here for so long? You're practically Spanish now." but now it makes me feel awkward because how much of my culture is left in me if that's true?
mitski was there for me when no one was and idc if i sound like a lunatic for that but she was there for me whenever i was sad,happy,angry. mitski is littetaly the best!
growing up with toxic parents in a biracial house hold being mixed with so much and constantly being asked "what are u?" it honestly hurts I'm not white enough I'm not Indian enough I'm not Puerto Rican enough ill never be enough sometimes I feel like just ripping off all my ethnic features and throwing them away I hate how my nose makes me look hate how my cheeky eyes make me look I hate how my curly hair never works on any products and I hate how my sisters have a higher privilege then me cuz they're the white beauty standard.
I honestly understand where ur coming from ☹️ sometimes I look in the mirror and can’t tell if I’m white (Greek) or Indian - I feel so culturally confused all the time, like I have no idea where I’m going. Sometimes I flop between thinking I’m a white girl Or not and I look so damn ambiguously poc at the same time I just can’t tell who I’m supposed to be
@@Kittywolf1777 honestly this is something I wish I learned a long time ago. Ur never gonna be white or Indian enough because ur not one u are both. Embrace both sides and don’t feel as if u have to pick one cuz u don’t. U shouldn’t have to dissect urself thinking u have to choose one when ur an amazing person. Stay strong
I really had a crush on this one girl, she is gorgeous and she didn’t made uncomfortable questions about my country and was very sweet when I first met her, our relationship grew and we became friends, catching a crush on her with time. Later, she acted like if my culture was an aesthetic and vibe, directly calling it that, every conversation we had would mostly end about my country, she ghosted me after, and started to hang out with a group of people who recorded me and a friend on a very racist video:(((
If you think it's just white americans then you're sorely mistaken. Just look at all the elitist families who are Jewish, Eastern Asian or pretty much everywhere else.
Being white, i could not tell you about my experience with this song, but i want to scream at every single girl who relates to this song that should be proud of their culture. If your american boy doesn't want you because you aren't a perfect american girl, drop him, find someone else. Your culture, your "race", your origin, your religion, they are part of the riches of *you* , and you should be extremely proud of them. Please don't be insecure about it, culture is beautiful.
Not about the actual meaning of the song, but the part that says "you have so much to do, and i have nothing ahead of me" hits me particulary, since when someone is the little spoon they arent facing anything nor anyone,, the part "your mother wouldnt approve of how my mother raised me but i do" hits me in a familiar way, i wasnt raised like a normal kid and the lyrics that almost say that the person needed to accept how their own mother raised them resembles me.
when i was 4 i used to beg my mom to let me bleach my skin, hair, and get blue contacts. i begged for my dad to buy me "american" lunch and buy me fast food for dinner because i was so embarrassed of the foods we ate since it was so different from my friends dinners. now that ive gotten older i learned how to appreciate my culture and the differences between my family and my friends (im 12 now and none of my parents remember me doing this)
0:30 “You have so much to do, and I have nothing.” Mitski is one of the few artists that I painfully relate to, I wish that this line didn’t represent my life
I wish i could hug 7th grade me while listening to this song. Im peruvian with brown skin and used to hate my culture so much, people made me hate it. I remember crying in my moms arms wishing I had blue eyes and white skin. but now 9th grade, i love my culture and Im so proud of my parents for sacrificing everything by moving to this country so we could live a safer life.
My heart goes out to poc who hear this and are reminded of how they're excluded from a predominantly white society due to their skin or features. I can't directly relate to the pain you go through but I can support you all, even if its just a virtual hug heres a reminder that you are naturally beautiful and deserving of the world
[Verse 1] If I could, I'd be your little spoon And kiss your fingers forevermore But, big spoon, you have so much to do And I have nothing ahead of me [Verse 2] You're the sun, you've never seen the night But you hear its song from the morning birds Well, I'm not the moon, I'm not even a star But awake at night I'll be singing to the birds [Pre-Chorus] Don't wait for me, I can't come [Chorus] Your mother wouldn't approve of how my mother raised me But I do, I think I do And you're an all-American boy I guess I couldn't help trying to be your best American girl [Bridge] You're the one You're all I ever wanted I think I'll regret this [Chorus] Your mother wouldn't approve of how my mother raised me But I do, I finally do And you're an all-American boy I guess I couldn't help trying to be the best American girl [Outro] Your mother wouldn't approve of how my mother raised me But I do, I think I do
I love this song, but as a white woman, I will never claim nor change the meaning. You all have such beautiful souls and I'm so sorry you guys have and feel so isolated and fucked over by us. I hope you know your worth and just how fucking amazing you all are. You guys are the universe and deserve the world. Again, I'm so sorry and I wish I could hug and be there for all of you. You guys are amazing. I love you all so so much. Have a great day and life.
omg, as a south asian poc, even some of the south asian boys i see around go crazy for white girls and act as if brown girls are the most disgusting things ever ~ there's a serious colourism issue where i'm originally from and it's really sad. but yh, i feel this song, the fact that falling in love with someone that has SUCH a different culture to u, it feels hard to ever match their level because u want to please them but u feel so unworthy of them at the same time.
@@ann7375 aw yh i love u sm,, thank u for reading this little thing aha - yh ive learned to not really care that much anymore nd just carry on with life aha,, u slowly start getting immune to the feeling of not being enough i guess tho the way i just worded it probably sounded more depressing aha - im better tho !!
@@idontfwtechnology tysm !! us south asian girlies should support each other aha - and oml THANK YOU A LOT,, that means so much to me, ur so very kind,,, i hope you find that special someone too and may ur life be blesses
white people can have their own meaning of this song and relate to their own meaning. but they'll never relate to the real meaning and we need to not change the meaning. even though u can have ur own meaning, like i do. when i hear this song i personally think of how my family was and how i was envious of more rich and stable families. but guess what? thats not what the song is about. its about woc issues and people need to realize it. let them have this one thing jeez. have ur own meaning but dont take away from the real one.
When I was a little kid I used to love going outside and playing in the sun. But eventually I found out that people don't think that tan skin is "pretty". I was devastated and straight up cried almost every night about it. I stopped going outside and playing in the sun, I kept asking my parents for sunscreen, and I would always try my best to make myself look paler. And then one day I found out that my monolids weren't "pretty". I would tape them up to make double lids. I would steal my grandmas makeup and try to draw it on. Then I found out that my accent was considered "a joke" or "ugly". I would watch TH-cam videos on how to get an American accent. I've stopped doing so many things like stop bringing my own food to school because the kids made fun of it. I made a plan to bleach my hair and my skin and wear blue contacts. I truly don't think my friend knows how much it hurts me when she says she "wishes she wasn't white".
Growing up I had two best friends who were Mexican, and they’d REFUSE to go outside without an umbrella or something to cover their skin because they “wanted to be as pale as me and didn’t want dark skin” is what they said. I didn’t realize how heartbreaking that was at the time but looking back I feel awful they thought they had to lighten their skin to be pretty.
White people, we're allowed to listen and vibe to this masterpiece? Yes, we are. But keep it in mind: this is not about us. Please, we're not protagonists.
listening thinking about how when i was growing up i wanted to be white so bad i wanted to have beautiful straight hair that would flow in the wind. I wanted to have the same future they could i wanted the same opportunities they had but i just won’t because i’m a person of color.
EXACTLY i hated being mexican growing up, why couldn’t i be white? blonde hair, blue eyes, no body hair, not being called racial slurs and horrible things.
This song really resonates with me as an autistic woman. I feel like the second or third option chronically. I try my best to be the best, and for what?
Women of color we are beautiful daily reminder to love yourself, love your features, and our cultures. Never be ashamed of what makes us, us. We are beautiful 💓💓
Thank you mitski for this song, as a mexican girl with tan skin and never had fit into the beauty standard I literally relate so much, I am envious of any girl with white skin and blonde or light brown hair. I love my culture and adore all of my mexican features but I still sometimes wished I looked like them
mitski always capture what i'm feeling, that's crazy. I'm sobbing to this song. I'm white, still i'm ugly. I'm not trying to change the mitski's meaning of this song, still "you're the sun, you have never seen the night ... i'm not even a star" hits so hard. It's difficult to have some self esteem when you go to every fucking party and every boy is stunned by your best friends beauty. I act like i don't care, but what about me? Nobody ever likes me, there isn't a single guy that asks for my number, while my friends always have someone who likes them, who asks for their number. I'm not even a star, and i will never be one, even if i get surgery, even if i spend hours doing my makeup and going to the gym. If that's what i feel even tho i'm white, i can't even imagine what woc ( especially the non convencional attractive ones) feel. Our society is so superficial
As a man who’s done this to a woman this song brings me to tears. We’re both hispanic Americans, there’s history it wasn’t straight up like this. But I know how she felt about our upbringings and she dealt with so much pain, we couldn’t make it thru.
As a woc who would always try to be as white as possible by straightening my hair and such, this song really hit home for me. Every piece of media I saw made it out to where white was considered the most beautiful race and there was rarely any diversity, which influenced my image of myself. I wanted the thin nose, light skin, and straight hair despite having dark skin, a big nose, and coily hair. When I heard this song (and listened to the music video) it just struck a chord with me and I just related SO MUCH to feeling inferior as a non-white person.
"I'm not even a star" darlin you're the whole fucking universe
This made me feel so uplifted ty
@@judeweyland8834 im so glad!!
Aww🥺🥺❤️❤️❤️
See I think this lyric has a different meaning. I think we are supposed to have different purposes and are completely different from the white American boy she is talking about. The lyric “but awake at night I’ll be singing to the birds” says she is darkness.
this made me smile so hard
can't believe mitski invented america just for this song omg
She inveted the moon and skittles 🤩💅🏻
@@purr4829 SKITTLES?
Ikr such an icon
And spoons😍
😊😊😊😊😅p
“your mother wouldnt approve of how my mother raised me..
but i do, i think i do?”
but i do, i FINALLY do.”
korean american, asian household, immigrant mother, this slapped me across the face
This song brings me comfort in knowing I'm not crazy when I pose the question "why am I good enough for you to lust after, to comfort you, to love you but when the lights come on you dissapear because who would approve?"
I hate that I relate to this so much, but it is comforting knowing I’m not alone here
oh wow that hurt
ouch
I don't know if you've ever heard Mitski'd other song called "Liquid Smooth" but it hits just as hard as this one because Liquid Smooth very much sounds like it's coming from the perspective of a WOC who knows what it's like to only be seen as beautiful when being fetishized by others.
Stop I’m gonna cry
being a 1st gen woc with strict and toxic parents this song just hits me in the heart, i just want to experience fun relationships with guys or girls like most my age are, i feel so left out, all i do is stress over online school, clean the house 24/7, cry, sleep, eat and that's it? i wish i could be normal and pretty enough for people to want me, i grew out of my white validation phase thankfully, but part of me is still holding on, i just want someone to make me feel loved without me having to change myself to fit the damn beauty standard
We live the same life. I think the best thing we can tell ourselves is that we’re not alone, and that our time will come, we shouldn’t rush into anything. Remember that your worth is not based on how many partners you have.
I feel you :(
Jean
living the same life sadly :(
I relate to this so much, im also a first gen woc
This song makes me think of my mom. She's a brown woman from Cuba married to a white American man. They're rrly in love, but their cultures and personalities clash. She almost cried the other night because we don't have any family traditions, because my dad's family really doesn't, and she grew up with a lot of family traditions that she treasures.
Off topic but love your profile pic of baby Connor SHJJLKH
@@dumbp2312 thank you!
Yeah my mom is Korean American and my dad is white. I feel like my mom had to whitewash and Americanized her kids so that we wouldn’t face discrimination like she went through. I really wish I celebrated and knew more about my culture.
@@starface66 its never too late to do research and help her teach you about them :)
@@starface66 I understand this. my mother is Indian/Japanese and she is so whitewashed because of my white father and wanting to be seen as white. I wish she would stop dying her hair blonde every week and stop talking about wanting to get rid of her on ethnic features and showed me more about my culture, traditions, religion.
as a poc, this song literally hits me in the heart. i've never related to a song so much...
@maryam ! thank you!!
I remember how much I wanted to be white in 5th grade, both of my parents were immigrants and didn’t “act American” and I resented that part of me for a long time.
I SEE YMIR I RESPOND
Same
same :(
When I was little I had an entire plan to become white. Bleach my skin, straighten my hair, dye my hair blonde, get plastic surgery on my eyes so they were blue. I was 7.
i remember looking in a mirror and crying because i could never be pretty because i could never be white. i remember only drawing white princesses even though i don’t have white skin. i remember being shocked when my cousin drew a princess with dark skin, i didn’t know dark skinned princesses were a thing. i remember being insecure about the hair on my body. i remember being pushed to shave my body hair. i remember feeling too masculine no matter what i did. i remember finding all of my middle eastern features the ugliest things about me.
i never knew this was a shared experience among other poc and woc. comments like yours as well as this song have given me an overwhelming feeling of validation.
never had that experience but notice that unless I was drawing myself or a classmate I would be drawing white girls, I did that shit unconsciously.
i had the exact same plan + get surgery on my nose so it wasnt so wide when i was about 9 and i wrote it all down in my "get prettier" notebook :(
this happened to me but i think i was 9
Oh my god I am so sorry
I feel like this song is perfect for first generation women of color. I connected with it so much. It freaking brought me to tears.
right? this song captures the 1st gen woc experience so well it hurts
@@elisnovat3955 First off, people can read whatever they want into art. That's the whole point. Why make art if other people aren't going to interpret it for themselves? If you don't agree with other people's interpretations, fine, but don't be a dick about it, dude.
Second, this is what Mitski herself said in a Wired article: "I was in love with somebody, but I just felt like our backgrounds or the places we come from or how we were raised were so completely different. And it felt like something that couldn't be overcome by love."
I'd say that's very much about the struggles of 1st generation immigrants...
@@elisnovat3955 What the fuck? Mitski does indeed talk about what her songs mean, and she has literally talked about the fact that this song is about cultural differences impacting a relationship. I don't understand how you can HEAR her sing about "the way her mother raised her" and then say this is not about race. The fuck? Whatever, if you're incapable of listening to the goddamn lyrics, see www.npr.org/sections/allsongs/2016/03/01/468690106/new-mix-music-from-m-ward-nothing-marissa-nadler-a-chat-with-mitski-more?.com&?.com&#playlist and www.npr.org/2016/06/19/482375750/mitski-on-puberty-2-and-the-nature-of-happiness Also, I don't read a "victim complex racism issue" in the OP. Sit the fuck down.
Elis Novat For someone who accuses others of projecting, you sure get overly defensive and make a lot of assumptions about other people’s personal traits lmao
Same :(
“you’re the one, you’re all i ever wanted, i think ill regret this” is my favorite part
i think my favorite part is "you're the sun, you've never seen the night"
both quotes above me are soul crushing. i love them both. my favorite is "well im not the moon, im not even a star"
I'm a half-asian guy. As a kid growing up I used to be embarrassed by my Chinese mother's ways and second-language English. I've since 180'd and kinda wish I was more Chinese, super proud to be half. This song is great; love to all the women out there and people in general with whom this song resonates. You don't need "fixing."
180*
@@flwrhs Bahaha, good catch! ;)
thank you so much man
Felt this 100%, kinda scary how similar this is to my experiences, with the embarrassment phase and then wanting to be more "asian" and all (though the asian part was mainly for my mom's approval). Great to see that you've since accepted yourself, hope you're doing well now man
sobbing
to all of my immigrant daughters & woc reading this- i know how hard it is and how much you might be hurting as you listen to this song but please know i love you so so much
😭😭
I feel so guilty when i listen to this song, i’m a 2nd generation Mexican American but i feel so whitewashed like i don’t feel Hispanic enough for my own culture, but at the same time i’m not white enough for the US
literally took the words right out of my mouth
I'm mexican american as well, I dont know how to speak Spanish, I cant cook and I don't know anything about my culture it really sucks
fr its even worse when your surrounded by people who are very hispanic or very white but can relate to either
@@nataliearzo946 FR I FEEL DUMB ASF AT FAMILY GATHERINGS
@@ffxxss6697 YEAH LIKE IM JUST LIKE🧍♂️
i know a lot of people interpret this song to be about being in love with/in a relationship with someone and feeling alienated because of your culture/upbringing, but to me this song makes me think of growing up and thinking this exact way about everyone, especially friends. i always felt embarrassed and ashamed of how i was raised and tried to hide it around my american friends. i wish i was actually strong enough to get to the point where i can say "you mother wouldn't approve of how my mother raised me but i do i finally do." it's so hard to actually accept and love who you are when everyone around you makes you feel so different
Brazilian friends too;-;
god yes.
^
“You have so much to do and I have nothing ahead of me” hit hard as someone that was always behind in classes and never left the house. Watching people grow older and get friends whilst I’m just standing still. I’ve always been standing still and I find it comforting knowing that I won’t get anywhere in life.
This song needs to be played so loud your speakers are distorting to truly understand the beauty of it.
Nicholas Bal god i saw it live and i felt like i fucked mitski ever since
I wish it was louder😢
a half japanese half white woman who is from america made this song. (ik she was born in japan, but she wasn’t raised there, and i’m pretty sure she’s in america now which is a struggle being poc) it’s amazing. the feeling of being a poc but feeling distant from both sides, and not fitting into the standards of america.
it's not just for woc/poc who grew up in america it's for all of woc/poc
@@maya-ci2py well, immigrant poc. Because if someone is poc and grew up surrounded by other poc I don't think they would be able to relate (for example a japanese woman who has spent her entire life in her home country)
i have found my people
@@Otra_Chica_de_Internet yes but this could also be about dating a white man as a poc, and not being approved because of it and trying to be like his past girlfriends who were the same as him.
It makes me sad knowing that I’ll never fit his beauty standards, not just his but any boys beauty standards. They always choose the white girls, and they don’t even know how lucky they are. Then some of them complain about being brunette instead of having blonde hair, imagine being a 1st Gen immigrant :/
this 💔💔
Exactly. If all you had to do was dye your hair a lot of people would’ve done it already.
I probably wouldn’t fit any boys standard, I’m a gay, hispanic, male.
THIS
Fr
I'm actually glad this didn't come out in the 90s. I wouldn't have handled it.
Dogmo Satchmo Oh man, just as glad as you are too. I wouldn’t be able to handle it either, had it come out at a time that I miss so much and wish I can go back to relive my childhood again. :’(
A song that defines a generation
period.
this is a song abt woc..??
@@twistbugs the one instance when i want to gatekeep something
@@twistbugs I assume they’re talking about first gen immigrants, I’m not sure
@@twistbugs Of course, but they didn't say it wasn't... ?
Her going from “I think I do” to “I finally do” and then back to “I think I do” is one the most heartbreaking parts of the song. Finally acknowledging what your mother does for you, especially as a WOC, then having it be taken away because of the “I wish I were white” phase hits too hard to home. I’m indigenous and I grew up seeing people make fun of my cultural music and dancing. I’ve seen my mother go through so many hardships, and I myself experienced similar racism and misogyny she did. It hurt so much to be ridiculed where I wished I was white, I wished I could be like the white girls in my class, beautiful blue eyes and blonde hair. I remember not being allowed to have blonde Barbie’s because of that. Thankfully now I have learned to love my culture, but it gets hard sometimes to deal with the racism from others.
hey im indigenous too!! im so sorry for what you went through. youre beautiful, and i hope the world gets better. sending love
i am sobbing. this hurts so much. as a latina, who's not white passing at all, my ex white bf cheated on me and left me for this white girl. she's gorgeous, she's so lovely to him with her perfect blonde hair and blue eyes why on earth did i think my brown eyes could ever compete with his. im crying so hard right now, why cant i just be someone like her,
Baby you are BEAUTIFUL. You are not accountable for your appearance, only for your heart. And his heart was not good. Remember that your eyes are the most beautiful honey in the sun, the rich soil of which beautiful green life bursts.
your dark hair is the embers of which the fire of summer burns. It brings warmth and life to the smile you carry.
She is unique because she is her, and she is beautiful. But you are unique because you are not her. You are yourself. And that is the most beautiful person you can be. My Instagram is olivialikespuppets if you ever need to talk.
he's missing out. you are absolutely beautiful, no less than that other girl, and you do not deserve to feel bad about the way that you look. if he was willing to cheat on you he didn't deserve you in the first place; you're too good for him. i hope the pain gets better soon and i hope you know that you're absolutely gorgeous and there are wonderful people out there who will see that and love you :)
his loss :/ BUT hey ur beautiful just the way you are dont forget that!!
that is his loss!! YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL AND HE DOESNT DESERVE U WHATSOEVER!! EMBRACE WHO U ARE CUZ UR AMAZING!! although im just a kid and dont rlly have that much experience in the world, just know u r loved! ^^
his loss!!! you're so beautiful and deserve so much better...
Words cannot describe how much I love this song. It encapsulates my experience as a WOC perfectly. The line "But big spoon, you have so much to do-and I have nothing ahead of me" hits so hard. It is so hard growing up as a WOC and not seeing anybody who looks like you in movies and pop culture in general. The standard is white, American individuals. In movies, the heroes are always white. The villains are always foreign and darker-skinned. Nobody looked like me. As a Southeast Asian, it was hard growing up. Whenever there was Asian representation, most of it were East Asian people. And most of the time, those East Asian individuals would be the villain or painted out to be "mystical" and "oriental" with an exaggerated thick accent. If there was another WOC, many times they were sexualized or mocked. It was damaging and led me to believe that I could never be important; I could never be a hero. When I was a young child, I used to beg my mother to bleach my skin so I could fit in because I was bullied so badly in school for being different. For years, I refused to eat my grandma's cooking and begged for American food because that's what everyone else who was normal ate. I was always the only nonwhite kid in school. There was one Arabic kid but he would make fun of me with everybody else and he would allow himself to be made fun of, called "terrorist," and mocked his own family so he could fit in. I feel like so many POC feel like they are only worthy if they have white validation.
Regardless, I grew up with the biggest inferiority complex. Growing up in a predominately white midwest area was extremely traumatic. I'm still here and still feeling like I don't belong. But songs like these and reading the comments section of this video makes me feel like I'm not alone. I've grown to love myself and, now, I want to do nothing but embrace my culture and surround myself with it. To my fellow WOC, you are 1000% valid and I love you so much. I wish you all happiness and I hope you all learn to accept and love yourself.
Shit, that sounds like so much to go through at such a young age. I hope you're doing better, and remember: you're beautiful just the way you are!!!
To any woc/nboc who has cried to this song I will gladly wipe up your tears !! You all deserve the world and I'm sorry if you have ever felt like you weren't even a star, you most definitely are the whole universe !! I love you !!
i dont even know you but ily
What about a moc?
@@emoneslamian6757 hi hi!! I'm pretty sure this song is primarily directed towards women of color or afab people of color. I'm not exactly sure if it includes men of color but if any moc have cried to this song I will wipe up your tears as well!!
@@tmxdpage but thx your so sweet 🥺
Nboc? What is the meaning?
"well i'm not the moon, i'm not even a star"
as an indigenous person, that lyric hit so close to my heart. i grew up on an indian reservation, which is on a very small island, and i've had limited access to the world outside from my community. but everytime i leave, i feel like im a part of some unknown world. i feel like an outsider, i just feel so different from the rest of the white ppl at my town school bc i never got the same experience that they did.
ive always felt so in-between my indigenous community, and the mainstream society im not able to be apart of. somedays, i want to be a beautiful white boy with no problems in the world at all. id be rich, well-going and healthy. but also, i wanna stick to my culture sometimes, and be the "star" of my race. the attractive one, the ones you see on insta/tiktok everyday. i just dont know which character i wanna be, and it hurts so bad.
I am extremely curious as to where in America there is an Indian reservation on an island
@@MrKmas508 its in canada
you are not a character, you can be more than that, you ARE more than that.
@@shookyboy thank u so much. ur so sweet
i love how the lyrics “your mother wouldn’t approve of how my mother raised me but i do, i finally do” and “i think i do” are right next to each other. i think it shows no matter how much you make a stance and be proud of who you are there’s always a voice in the back of your head doubting you’re good enough because of the people who’ve engraved that in your psyche.
this song reminds me of growing up in a predominantly white neighborhood. I wanted to have blonde hair and be pale like the others so maybe they would like me. A memory I have is my white friend telling me "I wish I wasn't so pale. I wish I had your tan skin tone" but I wanted to have her skin tone so badly.
I've noticed that people always want what they can't have, or don't have. I think a lot of that comes from how the beauty standards in America are constantly changing, yet so strict and demanding. When you give society what they want, they change their mind immediately after and want something else, which puts you in the dark again. It's impossible to keep up with and please, and it sucks.
I want you to know though that tan skin like yours is very beautiful. All skin tones are, and you're just as worthy as the next person, whether they're pale or not. Don't ever try and change your features or hide your heritage because of what society tells you. It's society that has the issue, not you. The way POC are treated is terrible, and maybe one day you could use your experiences as a way to make a difference. I wish you the best, hun :)
yeah like in the uk you’re made fun of for being called pale and told to go outside and get a tan since it’s the standard and shows that you’re wealthy enough to go to holidays in the summer and get a tan / spray tan. of course not on the same scale as darker people have it but sadly the beauty standard will always put people down
i havent seen this response. i listen to this song when I really need it and I forgot i wrote that comment. I don't think i sobbed harder you're very lovely thank you. I've been feeling better about and honestly i really needed to see this. i wish u the best aswell. i wish i can express more but my hands are shaky haha @@Miss.Malibu
As a woc, this song hits so close to home. Being a mixed latina (indigenous and white) and not being white passing has had a huge impact on my life, Mitski’s music describes it perfectly. I’m so happy to see so many fellow woc connecting and relating to eachother in this comment section, not because of the experiences but because almost all of us have been through similar things and can support each other if that makes sense
I fell in love with a person with a completely different culture and upbringing to myself for the first time when I was 18, I knew it was doomed from the start but that didn't stop me falling for his autumn night eyes :(
Keep trying. Some white folks suck less than others. And for many of us, our best American girl is Asian, black or Latina. Fuck how our mothers raised us. They had their chance. Now its our turn. America is whatever the fuck we want it to be.
@@comradehermit9320 why do you assume that they meant "white folks?"
@@justinpipes85 maybe bc of the song they commented this on lol?
@@comradehermit9320 wtf this is so powerful and i needed it. ty
i fell in love with someone with a completely different culture too. im scared on how or if my mom finds out
If I could, I'd be a little spoon
And kiss your fingers forever more
But big spoon, you have so much to do
And I have nothing ahead of me
You're the sun, you've never seen the night
But you hear its song from the morning birds
But I'm not the moon, I'm not even a star
But awake at night I'll be singing to the birds
Don't wait for me, I can't go
Your mother wouldn’t approve/ Of how my mother raised me/ But I do, I think I do/ And you’re an all-American boy/ I guess I couldn’t help/ Trying to be/ Your best American girl.
You're the one
You're all I ever wanted
I think I'll regret this
Your mother wouldn’t approve/ Of how my mother raised me/ But I do, I finally do/ And you’re an all-American boy/ I guess I couldn’t help/ Trying to be/ The best American girl.
Your mother wouldn’t approve/ Of how my mother raised me/ But I do, I think I do.
i get a lump in my throat listening to this
This song always hits me. My boyfriend is Chilean and I am Venezuelan, and his mother is against our relationship, reaching a point where we were on the verge of breaking up. I'm still with him, but we're going through the worst moment of our relationship. All thanks to his mom.
Hope everything ends well to you
this song is so relatable it hurts. i can't even put it into words. it's like mitski grabbed my heart and the very essence of my soul and what it's been through and started singing it out loud.
i'm crying i love you mitski
I've always dreamed to be pale, thin straight hair, a small nose and flat hips. I cry whoever I see my wide hips, dark skin, frizzy curls, and tall nose. I feel so gross. I hate being stuck in a republican town in the south. I haven't been to my homeland in three years. I just don't want to feel like I stand out anymore
Don't feel gross, the only truly gross thing is that republican town and the trump supporters you have to deal with lmao. The corruption of societal beauty standards should not define nor determine how attractive any woc is. What you may see as imperfections are actually gorgeous in so many ways yet too many people are programmed to think not since a lot of privileged society is ignorant and annoying as hell.
Your are beautiful just the way you are, art belongs to the eye of the beholder and you are art
i just wanted to rant about how i relate to this song as a fully-bangladeshi girl // i grew up in a predominantly white neighborhood, and because of that, i've always felt insecure.
exhibit A: i try to hide my arms because of my excessive body hair (relating to the lyric "and you're an all-American boy
, I guess I couldn't help trying to be the best American girl")
exhibit B: im always embarrassed because my family isn't as wealthy (relating to the lyric "but, big spoon, you have so much to do
, and I have nothing ahead of me)
exhibit C: i hide my parents from people because they don't raise me the same way others do (relating to the lyric "your mother wouldn't approve of how my mother raised me").
exhibit D: it hurts to hear people fight about "blondes or brunettes," when they've never even LOOKED at the direction of WOC (relating to the lyric "you're the sun, you've never seen the night
, but you hear its song from the morning birds, well, I'm not the moon, I'm not even a star").
and so i ask, why do we always have to be ignored? why do people always have to be against us? i don't think ill ever get valid answers to those questions. so i think ill just embrace my culture instead.. and i say the same to my fellow people :)
awhh don't worry, as another full bangladeshi girl hopefully u'll feel better soon and u'll find somebody who loves u for who u r, dw
I'm half Bengali. Sending love. I hope you're well. I hope you're happy. I hope that in the three years that have passed you've grown to accept who you are. I hope you're surrounded by people who love you for you.
no lie.. this song made me cry because of how relatable it is. ),:
me too girl.
So did I honestly. :’(
narcissism incarnate - mitski mentions it's about troubles in a interracial relationship she was in and how their cultural differences became an issue
Lo entiendo porque nací y vivo en latinoamérica, pero no lo he experimentado :(
@@narcissismincarnate9201 the struggle WOC face
the star line is getting me bc black women have always been the last pick and even then, we’re not chosen unless we look a barbie doll and i’m tired
That’s what I’ve been thinking
As a white woman reading all the stories from WOC makes me sad, I know I will never understand your pain and frustration but I’m here to listen. That being said all the other white woman in the comments talking about not having “blonde hair, and blue eyes” you definitely missed the whole point of this song.😐
Everybody is going on about the lyrics, and don't get me wrong they are great, but can we talk about how tasty those drop D chords are? It's a big part of why this song hits so hard.
i had a line of this song’s lyrics on my lockscreen a few days ago, and my mom texted me telling me she looked the line up and ended up falling in love with Mitski’s songs. we took a late-night flight to Florida yesterday together and we shared airpods while listening to this song. it’s easily by far one of my favorite moments with my mom.
half a year later i just found this comment i made, lmao. proud to say we’re still avid mitski listeners :)
edit; going to see her concert in february this year !!! 😭
@@fIamingoslefttoehope you had a good time at the concert!
@@carat_lighti did ! saw her performance in boston !!! her way of singing is absolutely beautiful to hear in person
Your comment made me cry
I can't stop listening to this song over and over and over.
I need to pick my jaw up off the floor
“But big spoon, you have so much to do, and I have nothing ahead of me.”
Hits terribly close to home when you are surrounded by people who have forced themselves through thick and thin to get where they are and you have to live with the guilt of constant failure
ive dealt with ocd, anxiety and now depression most of my life and i feel as if ill never be able to have real relationships because of my constantly crumbling mental condition. my first boyfriend lived in a world completely different from mine, he was american and had never had any severe mental illnesses or disorders (i am also from australia). his life was great until i entered it. he didn't know much about mental disorders and was afraid of mine for so long. it eventually tore our relationship apart because he felt pressured to take care of me. i dont love him romantically anymore, but i miss him as a friend. he hates me now and im afraid ill always feel like i cant show my real self to anyone because our worlds are too different. i used to listen to this song a lot as we started drifting apart. i never felt good enough for him, but now i realise that isnt healthy for a relationship. i hope he is having a really good life now. sometimes i feel like ill never be able to be apart of everyone elses world though. but reading comments on mitski songs makes me feel less alone, i know everyone in the world is struggling. i hope everyone can find happiness and can overcome their struggles. thank you mitski
i hope youre doing better than you were when you wrote this comment
I feel so weird listening to this song knowing I don’t relate to it in any way, but it somehow seems to comfort me. It’s an almost disgusting feeling, honestly
to all of the woc here, i love you so much. you’re gorgeous. you’re loved. you’re beautiful.
thank you :)
do white passing people count? /gen
when i was in like first grade i came home crying that i wanted to be blonde with blue eyes, and that every pretty girl in my class was blonde with blue eyes. i’m asian. i wish i could go back and tell her that she is beautiful, and that she’s going to grow up into the most beautiful young woman and she doesn’t need blue eyes or blonde hair to do that.
lol yeah a lot of poc girls wish to be white with blue eyes and blonde hair which is so toxic
Omg , same ):
this song crushes me.
I'm crushing on a yt boy, "you've never seen the night, but you hear it's song from the morning birds," reminds me of how he can do all he wants to be against racism and sexism, but he'll never know the real affect it can have on a person. Especially a person who's mourning the loss of a little girl and embracing someone else, better, but still mourning the loss of that girl.
“your mother wouldnt approve of how my mother raised but i do i finally do” im literally about to cry dont
this song reminds me of when i "fell in love" with this white dude and i whitewashed myself so much to just feel accepted by him (im a 1st gen asian) and it still didn't stop him and other boys from fetishizing me. like i had this one guy be my friend for a year solely for the purpose of getting "asian nudes" and this other guy tried to date me because of the asian girl stereotype (one time he was talking to his friend and he said, "see. asian girls are always so forgiving!") those boys left me for the "best american girl." white girls with eurocentric features: everything i will never be. on top of that, i'm filipino and i dont fit the asian beauty standard of porcelain skin, monolid eyes, small face, and slim figure. im slightly tan with hooded eyes, big arms, keratosis pilaris, and eye bags. i cant remember a single time ive seen a character that looked like me while i was growing up other than dora. so either way, it's hard for me to accept myself. :/
Why do u desire white cock so much?
i bet you’re the prettiest girl on earth baby ❤
"I know what a volcano feels like"
EMILY AND SUE 😍😍😍😍😍
I was scrolling and waiting for a comment like this
@@candedimeo699 hahahahhaha
Cheky Sam who ?
yasss! That moment emisue
to all of the woc in this comment section and beyond, i love you. thank you for toughening up even when you shouldn’t of had to
i’m first gen half filipino, and i’ve never truly felt asian because of how white washed i am and i don’t feel asian because i’ve been told so many times “you’re not really asian” it’s hard to fit in so i had to learn to love myself and i’m glad i did
me too!! i'm a first gen filipino-mexican person! i get teased by my family so much about how i'm white washed and stuff because i grew up in a predominately white neighborhood outside of the city i was born in. it's hard to flip back and forth from wanting desperately to be white and then wanting to remove yourself from the whiteness you grew up in :(
As someone who's mixed between white and arabic, i was about to comment something like this but i was aftraid people would think that i dont have any "real" struggles, so i am so happy i found your comment, i hope you have a great day and i relate to this so much
@@deidremmm I WAS EXACTLY ABOUT TO SAY THAT, like i feel terrible because my ex bsf was a poc and i ranted to her about trying to distance myself from my arabic side after my crush rejected me because of it, and i remember her facial expression when she said "at least u have the white too" and since then i havent really talked about any of my struggles because i felt so bad and like idk how to explain it but ur comment felt so relatable i just had to reply to it hah..
I can't speak my parents' language because was never taught it but I was expected to just know it or learn it on my own, I can't even find any good language videos or sites for it and google translate JUST got it last year but it still feels unreliable. It's frustrating because I'm teased for not knowing it >:/
I'm filipino chinese, I get you. We barely even celebrate chinese holidays anymore or we dont really love our culture as much. I feel so invalidated but I'm asian, and you are asian too. You cant erase that part of yourself
"Your mother wouldn't approve of how my mother raised me, but I do, I finally do" always makes me cry.
I spent so long trying to be something I wasn't, trying to make myself fit this mold that only white women and white people in general could fit into. And when I was younger I went as far as trying to forget the culture I was raised in. I've always felt insecure as a Puerto Rican. Even though I know we're not the most discriminated against that never changed the way I saw the dirty glances I'd get if I were too loud or too proud of my heritage. Especially because of the fact I'm afab It took a lot for me to realize I am proud of myself, and that I should never be ashamed of myself.
I understand how you feel, im half Cuban half Puerto Rican and as a kid i wanted like nothing to do with my culture, I wanted to have white skin and straight blonde hair and blue eyes. I was always so frustrated that I didn’t measure up to the standard. I love my heritage so much, it means the world to me now. I’m still insecure about my looks, but ive begun to feel better about myself bit by bit as time goes on
idk if you even care, but from one internet stranger to another, I get it
this is one of those songs that demands great headphones or speaker system. awesome though
yea lmao i tried listening on some shitty headphones and i couldn't hear her vocals at al
I relate to this song. Not because im POC but because I'm disabled. Mitski really spoke to every minority with this one, i think.
I agree, as someone who is questioning if I’m trans or not it completely encompasses the feeling of never being good enough for a man to love you.. or anyone really. It’s hard to pretend to be something you’re not or accept the fact of reality. This song just helps me feel like someone knows what I’m going through.
"your mother wouldn't approve of the way my mother raised me"
as a middle eastern, this hits hard.
same :(
before I used to be embarrassed of my mom when she would speak with her Spanish accent and her customs from our country, the way she would be so considerate and affectionate to others that isn’t common in America. I used to feel embarrassed because of these things but now I’ve learnt to appreciate all these things she has taught me and how to develop as a person because I feel like the culture she passed onto me has a lot to do with how I am as a person. For that, I can now proudly say that I am Peruvian. This song resonates deeply with my experience as a young teen and the emotions I felt at that time.
this song reminds me of my mom and lowkey makes me so sad. she was a asian immigrant who came to america and was ridiculed for not knowing english, and she married a california american white man. the way she grew up was so accurate to this song.
I am so addicted to this song. it's in my head when I fall asleep & there when I wake up.
literal same.
Heather Abney same here ^^
i love this comment so much and i dont know why
This song has always had a different meaning for me. Despite its whole theme on race, the lines “you’re the one. You’re all I’ve ever wanted. I think I’ll regret this.” Have always stuck out to me.
I was in love with a girl. We had a thing going for a while and I loved her dearly. But something always told me I would regret it. That it wouldn’t last. She was perfect. She was all I wanted. But sure enough, it’s caused me more heartache than anything else. We’re not together anymore, but I hope I can find someone where I know I won’t regret anything.
This song was sent to me by a guy once. He was my mom's friend son, this particular friend had a strict traditional way of parenting. My mother and other friends always felt bad for her kids, her son was a very good friend of mine and growing up I wasn't really affectionate nor interested in love. One night we were texting and he sent me this song with a lengthy message, turns out he liked me for years and thought I looked down on him because he didn't do well in school or because he was raised the old way. I was shocked to say the least, we met the next day and had a long conversation and I told him " I'm not going to tell you that I know what you're feeling but I am gonna tell you that you were always my best boy" he cried into my arms that day but he was happy and relieved in the end and that's what I care about ♡
(0:30) realest thing I've ever heard in my entire life
For real
"Your mother wouldn't approve of how my mother raised me, but I do, I finally do."
I almost forgot how to speak Romanian because when I was younger and didn't speak much English I would get made fun of for it. So I completely stopped speaking my mother tongue once I learned English properly, now I'm trying to re-learn my own language.
I brought traditional food to school for the first time a couple of months ago, it was such a big deal for me.
Girl ur Romanian ur white .. don’t try getting ur story into this
Another Romanian here! A few months ago, I changed my nationality to the one of the country I emigrated to (Spain) because it would make getting a job and other things easier. My parents were on board and assured me how it wouldn't change anything about me. But after actually doing it, I feel sad, it was like losing a part of myself.
I used to like when other people told me "You've been here for so long? You're practically Spanish now." but now it makes me feel awkward because how much of my culture is left in me if that's true?
“your mother wouldn’t approve of how my mother raised me” PLEASE.
mitski was there for me when no one was and idc if i sound like a lunatic for that but she was there for me whenever i was sad,happy,angry. mitski is littetaly the best!
growing up with toxic parents in a biracial house hold being mixed with so much and constantly being asked "what are u?" it honestly hurts I'm not white enough I'm not Indian enough I'm not Puerto Rican enough ill never be enough sometimes I feel like just ripping off all my ethnic features and throwing them away I hate how my nose makes me look hate how my cheeky eyes make me look I hate how my curly hair never works on any products and I hate how my sisters have a higher privilege then me cuz they're the white beauty standard.
I honestly understand where ur coming from ☹️ sometimes I look in the mirror and can’t tell if I’m white (Greek) or Indian - I feel so culturally confused all the time, like I have no idea where I’m going. Sometimes I flop between thinking I’m a white girl Or not and I look so damn ambiguously poc at the same time I just can’t tell who I’m supposed to be
@@Kittywolf1777 honestly this is something I wish I learned a long time ago. Ur never gonna be white or Indian enough because ur not one u are both. Embrace both sides and don’t feel as if u have to pick one cuz u don’t. U shouldn’t have to dissect urself thinking u have to choose one when ur an amazing person. Stay strong
I really had a crush on this one girl, she is gorgeous and she didn’t made uncomfortable questions about my country and was very sweet when I first met her, our relationship grew and we became friends, catching a crush on her with time. Later, she acted like if my culture was an aesthetic and vibe, directly calling it that, every conversation we had would mostly end about my country, she ghosted me after, and started to hang out with a group of people who recorded me and a friend on a very racist video:(((
I know how you feel it always hurts so mych when they backstab you, especially when you get a crush on them.
"you have so much to do but i have nthg ahead of me" this hits so hard
I can relate to this.. interracial relationships are difficult
i think someone was mean to you when you didn't deserve it
"american" doesn't specify race, maybe i'm just not hearing some of the other lyrics
+Jack Xin that's because everyone wants our superior skin color
sweeping generalizations are great.
If you think it's just white americans then you're sorely mistaken. Just look at all the elitist families who are Jewish, Eastern Asian or pretty much everywhere else.
Being white, i could not tell you about my experience with this song, but i want to scream at every single girl who relates to this song that should be proud of their culture. If your american boy doesn't want you because you aren't a perfect american girl, drop him, find someone else. Your culture, your "race", your origin, your religion, they are part of the riches of *you* , and you should be extremely proud of them. Please don't be insecure about it, culture is beautiful.
Not about the actual meaning of the song, but the part that says "you have so much to do, and i have nothing ahead of me" hits me particulary, since when someone is the little spoon they arent facing anything nor anyone,, the part "your mother wouldnt approve of how my mother raised me but i do" hits me in a familiar way, i wasnt raised like a normal kid and the lyrics that almost say that the person needed to accept how their own mother raised them resembles me.
Tune of the year so far.
agreed.
+Trevor Harrison agreed
just heard this on a local radio station in Chestertown Maryland holy crap I'm in love... What a jam
+devin canfield so good
qwertyfields owo maryland isn’t in the new england region
when i was 4 i used to beg my mom to let me bleach my skin, hair, and get blue contacts. i begged for my dad to buy me "american" lunch and buy me fast food for dinner because i was so embarrassed of the foods we ate since it was so different from my friends dinners. now that ive gotten older i learned how to appreciate my culture and the differences between my family and my friends (im 12 now and none of my parents remember me doing this)
0:30
“You have so much to do, and I have nothing.”
Mitski is one of the few artists that I painfully relate to, I wish that this line didn’t represent my life
as a woc this song means so much to me i relate to it so much i can’t even explain it.
I wish i could hug 7th grade me while listening to this song. Im peruvian with brown skin and used to hate my culture so much, people made me hate it. I remember crying in my moms arms wishing I had blue eyes and white skin. but now 9th grade, i love my culture and Im so proud of my parents for sacrificing everything by moving to this country so we could live a safer life.
My heart goes out to poc who hear this and are reminded of how they're excluded from a predominantly white society due to their skin or features. I can't directly relate to the pain you go through but I can support you all, even if its just a virtual hug heres a reminder that you are naturally beautiful and deserving of the world
Big hug for you ):
[Verse 1]
If I could, I'd be your little spoon
And kiss your fingers forevermore
But, big spoon, you have so much to do
And I have nothing ahead of me
[Verse 2]
You're the sun, you've never seen the night
But you hear its song from the morning birds
Well, I'm not the moon, I'm not even a star
But awake at night I'll be singing to the birds
[Pre-Chorus]
Don't wait for me, I can't come
[Chorus]
Your mother wouldn't approve of how my mother raised me
But I do, I think I do
And you're an all-American boy
I guess I couldn't help trying to be your best American girl
[Bridge]
You're the one
You're all I ever wanted
I think I'll regret this
[Chorus]
Your mother wouldn't approve of how my mother raised me
But I do, I finally do
And you're an all-American boy
I guess I couldn't help trying to be the best American girl
[Outro]
Your mother wouldn't approve of how my mother raised me
But I do, I think I do
I love this song, but as a white woman, I will never claim nor change the meaning. You all have such beautiful souls and I'm so sorry you guys have and feel so isolated and fucked over by us. I hope you know your worth and just how fucking amazing you all are. You guys are the universe and deserve the world. Again, I'm so sorry and I wish I could hug and be there for all of you. You guys are amazing. I love you all so so much. Have a great day and life.
As an afghani, who didn’t really care for my appearance, I barely relate to this but I love how it sounds.
Am currently writing an essay about myself growing up with immigrant parents as i sob and weep listening to this song
omg, as a south asian poc, even some of the south asian boys i see around go crazy for white girls and act as if brown girls are the most disgusting things ever ~ there's a serious colourism issue where i'm originally from and it's really sad. but yh, i feel this song, the fact that falling in love with someone that has SUCH a different culture to u, it feels hard to ever match their level because u want to please them but u feel so unworthy of them at the same time.
I’m so sorry you feel this way, I know what it’s like to be brown but we shouldn’t care abt other guys opinions tbh
@@ann7375 aw yh i love u sm,, thank u for reading this little thing aha - yh ive learned to not really care that much anymore nd just carry on with life aha,, u slowly start getting immune to the feeling of not being enough i guess tho the way i just worded it probably sounded more depressing aha - im better tho !!
Plenty of guys like Indian girls too though so don’t worry
nah bc same, as another south asian dw, you got this!!! hopefully you'll feel better soon and you'll find somebody who loves u for who u are
@@idontfwtechnology tysm !! us south asian girlies should support each other aha - and oml THANK YOU A LOT,, that means so much to me, ur so very kind,,, i hope you find that special someone too and may ur life be blesses
white people can have their own meaning of this song and relate to their own meaning. but they'll never relate to the real meaning and we need to not change the meaning. even though u can have ur own meaning, like i do. when i hear this song i personally think of how my family was and how i was envious of more rich and stable families. but guess what? thats not what the song is about. its about woc issues and people need to realize it. let them have this one thing jeez. have ur own meaning but dont take away from the real one.
I AGREE
"you're the sun, who never seen a night, but you hear a song from morning birds, well I'm not the moon, I'm not even a star" gots me everytime...
When I was a little kid I used to love going outside and playing in the sun. But eventually I found out that people don't think that tan skin is "pretty". I was devastated and straight up cried almost every night about it. I stopped going outside and playing in the sun, I kept asking my parents for sunscreen, and I would always try my best to make myself look paler.
And then one day I found out that my monolids weren't "pretty". I would tape them up to make double lids. I would steal my grandmas makeup and try to draw it on.
Then I found out that my accent was considered "a joke" or "ugly". I would watch TH-cam videos on how to get an American accent.
I've stopped doing so many things like stop bringing my own food to school because the kids made fun of it.
I made a plan to bleach my hair and my skin and wear blue contacts.
I truly don't think my friend knows how much it hurts me when she says she "wishes she wasn't white".
Growing up I had two best friends who were Mexican, and they’d REFUSE to go outside without an umbrella or something to cover their skin because they “wanted to be as pale as me and didn’t want dark skin” is what they said.
I didn’t realize how heartbreaking that was at the time but looking back I feel awful they thought they had to lighten their skin to be pretty.
White people, we're allowed to listen and vibe to this masterpiece? Yes, we are. But keep it in mind: this is not about us. Please, we're not protagonists.
❤️
thank u for understanding
Can you provide an example of what wanting to be a protagonist would it be for a white person when it comes to this song?
@@sonial1839 in this song, Mitski is talking about her experience as a POC woman, especially in romantic relationships.
as a white person, i agree
listening thinking about how when i was growing up i wanted to be white so bad i wanted to have beautiful straight hair that would flow in the wind. I wanted to have the same future they could i wanted the same opportunities they had but i just won’t because i’m a person of color.
this is exactly what I’m growing through right now god I also live in a shitty country
EXACTLY i hated being mexican growing up, why couldn’t i be white? blonde hair, blue eyes, no body hair, not being called racial slurs and horrible things.
@@weirdozz2763 YES
This song really resonates with me as an autistic woman. I feel like the second or third option chronically. I try my best to be the best, and for what?
Women of color we are beautiful daily reminder to love yourself, love your features, and our cultures. Never be ashamed of what makes us, us. We are beautiful 💓💓
any mitski song never fails to make me cry
Thank you mitski for this song, as a mexican girl with tan skin and never had fit into the beauty standard I literally relate so much, I am envious of any girl with white skin and blonde or light brown hair. I love my culture and adore all of my mexican features but I still sometimes wished I looked like them
mitski always capture what i'm feeling, that's crazy. I'm sobbing to this song. I'm white, still i'm ugly. I'm not trying to change the mitski's meaning of this song, still "you're the sun, you have never seen the night ... i'm not even a star" hits so hard. It's difficult to have some self esteem when you go to every fucking party and every boy is stunned by your best friends beauty. I act like i don't care, but what about me? Nobody ever likes me, there isn't a single guy that asks for my number, while my friends always have someone who likes them, who asks for their number. I'm not even a star, and i will never be one, even if i get surgery, even if i spend hours doing my makeup and going to the gym. If that's what i feel even tho i'm white, i can't even imagine what woc ( especially the non convencional attractive ones) feel. Our society is so superficial
I relate a lot to this meaning/interpretation
‘Your mom wouldn’t approve of how my mother raised me but I do, I think I do’
Real mitski real
especially the ‘I think I do’ AGHHHHH
SHE JUST GETS IT
As a man who’s done this to a woman this song brings me to tears. We’re both hispanic Americans, there’s history it wasn’t straight up like this. But I know how she felt about our upbringings and she dealt with so much pain, we couldn’t make it thru.
“your mother wouldn’t approve of how my mother raised me. but i do, i finally do.” wow.
As a woc who would always try to be as white as possible by straightening my hair and such, this song really hit home for me.
Every piece of media I saw made it out to where white was considered the most beautiful race and there was rarely any diversity, which influenced my image of myself. I wanted the thin nose, light skin, and straight hair despite having dark skin, a big nose, and coily hair.
When I heard this song (and listened to the music video) it just struck a chord with me and I just related SO MUCH to feeling inferior as a non-white person.