hang in there, it does not stop hurting, but it gets painful less often. 3 years later after losing my dad I still think random people in the street its him
Chris, my sincerest condolences. You are not alone by any means. It's funny how many people may have landed on Caroline's video and were not likely searching for it, but they certainly needed it when they found it. It's even funnier how profound and impactful the support of absolute strangers can be during a time of need, which gives a person a sense of hope and that there are still good people out there who genuinely care about supporting others when they need help. Caroline certainly did that for me in this video, as well as for many people who don't even know her. Although I don't know you, I do have compassion for how you've been feeling, and hope that you've been able to find some comfort during this time, and will continue find comfort and joy throughout your life 🙂
Thank you for this video!!!! So very helpful!!! I especially loved the idea of the daily micro journal. Your videos are fabulous!!! Please don't ever leave us. ❤😊
Hey again Caroline ❤ I am sitting here crying like a lil baby. You really went above and beyond in helping me find a way to help myself out and therefore help my Mom. Each tip was so thoughtful and dare I say genius. I didn’t even think to “shop” around her place to move the colours from one room to another. I can’t wait to go for a walk and come back feeling ready to organize at least 5 things. It’s much less scary when you break it down into bite sizes. This video genuinely made my heart happy for the first time in a while. Through the tears, I felt a burst of energy that I haven’t felt for the past month of loss. Your humour and compassion throughout the video were like a hug from an old friend, tbh. Thank you, sincerely, with all my heart. For your time, effort and empathy. Even though we’re all strangers, I feel so connected and supported ❤ Happy new year Caroline, thank you times a million & I hope you’re doing well! Edit: Your sweet video brought me up from a shitty 2/10 to a precious 8/10 and for that I am thankful 🤗
Ah man I didn’t even know if you were still on TH-cam🥲I had no idea if this video would get to you, I’m so glad that it did. Thank you for putting it in motion. I’d like to call out that you reached out, when it felt hardest, and said “this is what would help”. That’s the hardest step. It doesn’t guarantee the results we expect, but eventually, I think it gets to a safe place. Thank you for opening up as you did. I really have been thinking about you and your message for weeks. I hope you are being kind to yourself in an unknown time. Love to you friend ❤️
This is my second viewing of this video and I had no idea until the end, like the rest of the viewers that this was specifically to answer and be helpful to you… and I cried like a baby. I lost my dad and the months during the diagnosis and loss was a vacuum like no other. I send you so much love and hope that you find the memories of good times when you feel the unbearable quiet hits. Can’t stress it enough… you’ve got an entire community sending you love and are praying for your heart to find peace as the moments come when you need it. 💜🙏🏻💜 ~N
A quick tip to anyone out there who checked out when she said to take a walk because you're like me and spend about 50 hours on your feet at work in one week and the idea of going for a 15 minute walk sounds painful, try sitting outside for 15 minutes and staring at trees and little birds and squirrels.
15:35 I was expecting her to say “what’s coming next is better” but I love how she said “what’s coming next is unknown and full of possibilities”… it was a nice reminder to myself that I don’t always have to keep outgoing myself…
I had the same thought. It was so honest. We don't have to pretend it's going to be better, but we can say that it's got potential. The fact that it's a chance, that it's not pre-ordained... and we're not filling that space with false platitudes. It was perfect.
As an Occupational Therapist, the advice you have provided is exactly what I educate my clients on. However, I love that your video is from lived experience AND that it’s not heavy and all about depression or low energy. Thank you for this. I have saved it in my therapist tool box and will be sharing with appropriate clients who would benefit and appreciate your honesty and compassion.
Wow this is so rewarding to hear. I have a lot easier time implementing it in video format than in real life…😂but it feels so good to share. It’s all a work in progress ❤️
@@Caroline_Winkler ah, yes Caroline, it is all a work in progress! Even for me at 65 years on this earth! It is wonderful that you are able to vlog what so many need to hear. Big hug.
This was the kindest thing you could have done for that subscriber. That sweet deed is now rippling through the rest of our lives. God bless you, Caroline.
Ok this one is going viral. Accessible truth spoken here. You are not just decorating, You are now changing lives and thought patterns. You are a rock star!
Exactly my thoughts, not only does she give us good ideas and simple things to do, she's speaking from her own experiences and really put her heartfelt emotion into it as well. Caroline ~ decorating therapist!!! Love her!
I know this is an older video and you probably won't even see this comment, but I just wanna say I'm grateful you take the emotional component of desgning your space into consideration. A few months ago my dad passed away and I inherited my family home and I am preparing to move in next year. It is such a wild mix of feelings dealing with this. This place is so familiar to me, but it also feels strange. I am really sad about the reasons why I own this place now, but I am also very excited to have the opportunity to design a whole new home. Sometimes I feel like I want to get rid of everything and the next moment I wanna keep everything as is. It's such a roller coaster... and that's okay. I am watching a bunch of your videos and they help me a lot and I wanna say thank you for that 💕
@@cb5284 That is very sweet of you. It's going okay, I'm taking my time with it. I've sold some stuff, donated a few things. I got help from my partner calling the donation place, because if made me feel bad and I dreaded doing it myself. There's a few items I definitely want to keep as a family heirloom and some I still can't decide on, but taking off the pressure of myself to decide right away is helping a lot. Also decided to take my time finding new items so I make sure I'm buying them because I'm actually in love with them and not just because I need them right away. Yesterday I finally found dining room chairs that I adore and can now replace the old ones from my dad. It's still a process, but not as much of a roller coaster anymore :)
@cb5284 I think I replied to this like a week ago, but it seems my answer didn't post for some reason. Thanks for your kind words. I've sold some things, donated some and am keeping some that I either love and wanna keep as a family heirloom and there's also stuff I'm not sure about yet. Taking off the pressure of having to do and decide on everything all at once is a big relieve. Sometimes it's still emotional, but it's becoming less of a roller coaster I think.
@choupette_44 I'm sorry for your loss. If you can do that at all, best advice I can give is to take your time. You don't need to do everything at once or decide everything right away. If things get emotional it's okay to take a break or do something different for a while, even if it seems random. You got this!
When I felt depressed and overwhelmed in my small space, I realized it was visual clutter. But I have a lot of books and art supplies in a tiny place! I have them all on shelves against adjacent walls and it can be a bit much. So I hung two layers of curtains from the ceiling, a solid layer and a sheer detailed layer, and just pulled the curtains on what I didn’t want to see! It was a game changer.
I can’t believe how much I needed this today. Just moved to a new area, started a new job, living in a temporary space. I’m sad and hopeful and lonely and proud and all the things. This video, your words, reminded me why I made the choices that led me here and that however I’m feeling at any given time is temporary. Thanks for doing what you do.
That is a lotttt of newness. The unknown is the scariest, easy to mentally torture yourself there. And it’s also where all the good things happen❤️but of course you know that, that’s why you made those moves. I hope you are able to find enough small comforts for yourself in the mean time while you wait to reap all the rewards of these changes. Hang in there friend ❤
I like that you use “and” instead of “but” my therapist taught me that, too - you can feel conflicting emotions all at once and they’re all true and all valid. Mental health game recognize game 😂😅
@@steelynash5894wow thank you for pointing that out! i feel mindblown lol, i don’t know why i never thought of it that way. you can be happy and nervous, sad and hopeful, etc, without having to say “but”
What a lovely, thoughtful thing to do. I lost my Mum a few weeks ago and your video reminded me of the kindness that so often comes from strangers, someone we 'know' on TH-cam, a neighbour we haven't spoken to before, someone in the coffee shop or a proper smile from someone that reaches their eyes and makes you feel as if they sense your pain even when no words pass between you. Thank you for being kind. x
I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my momma when I was 18 and it's a crusher. Miss her still so much. A kid always needs their mom. Sending you so much love
I can’t imagine what you’re going through. And I’m so sorry. Thank you for sharing this piece of light with me and with everyone despite it all. Biggest hug to you
She is definitely not lying with the lamps! TL;DR - I changed this space so that it no longer reminds me of him or us together or the bad OR good times we had. This space is now completely ME, the way I've imagined a cozy space while living alone. And because of that, I'm starting to have more good days and fewer bad ones. I'm recovering from a 9-year...thing (don't even know what to call it) with a man who has Narcissistic Personality Disorder and who could, at times, be very aggressive and occasionally violent. The bouts of depression and grief and shame and guilt (at myself) coming out of something like that is REAL... especially when that person lived in the same house and certain areas bring up messed up memories of things that happened. SO...I made the decision a few days ago to completely redecorate the living area and hallway. We just moved into this house not that long ago and so we hadn't really gotten into furnishing and decorating these areas yet. That's actually a GOOD thing because the living room is still mostly empty, which means it's easier to actually envision what I want. We had picked out a few paintings and lamps together that he paid for, but he knew how homey it was starting to feel to me, so of course he packed them to take with him, pretty much leaving the living room bare. So, after really thinking about how I want this room to feel when I walk in from a long, tiring day, I went out and picked a few paintings on my own, bought a couple more that coordinate with those from Amazon, and also bought 2 standing lamps. They're simple lamps, but they're kind of elegant. They're perfect for a situation when you want your own (and any visitors') eyes to focus on the paintings and overall vibe, but they're kind of becoming my favorite things about this room! My favorite thing about these lamps? They have 3 light "warmth" settings. So I can change the warmth of the light's color depending on the mood I'm in or the vibe I'm going for. Because I'm going for the vibe of a rustic cabin with a country girl's touch, when the lights are set on the warmer tone the room looks more old-fashioned and rustic. When I use the cooler tones it still looks rustic, but more modern (and a little brighter). So I use the cooler tones when I'm feeling those bouts of depression coming on (the brighter feeling is a big pick-me-up) and the warmer tone when I'm feeling mellow and just hanging out reading or cooking or watching something. Sorry that was so long! The main point is that I changed this space so that it no longer reminds me of him or us together or the bad OR good times we had. This space is now completely ME, the way I've imagined a cozy space while living alone. And because of that, I'm starting to have more good days and fewer bad ones because the space I've created feels like the comforting arms of a good, solid friend I can fall into and feel whatever I'm feeling in peace and safety before enjoying a little hot tea & sympathy. ♥️
Sharing in case this helps others in the comments. I realized **SCENT** can make a big difference. Yesterday I realized that I associate the scent in my apartment with depression. I put the diffuser outside and felt a noticeable difference. It was a great scent but it has been with me in some low times recently, so getting rid of it helped me separate out of that feeling a teeny tiny bit.
This is a great tip. Powerful advice. I always think about the positive memories and feelings that a scent can evoke but I never saw the connection to the negative that can occur.
Totally agree.. I recently started to associate happy memories with some scents, so whenever I am in a state of drawning myself into the black hole of sadness (happen quite often), I try to pull up those 'happy scents' to simply remind that I am actually capable of feeling happiness
So timely. My youngest girl is going through a dark space right now. Yesterday we went in cleaned out her dust bunnies, and did laundry. She took down her little Christmas tree, and then we got out of the house. Really helped her focus out for a while. Baby steps.
you are doing such a good thing for her by helping her take those baby steps!! hoping she makes it through soon, i cant tell you how important that kind of support can be
You sound like a lovely mum. I don't have this kind of support and it's awful. This is what mums are all about, sadly mine has no empathy and doesn't understand depression at all. Love to you and your daughter ❤️
you are great. my mom does this in my university dorm for me when she visits and i always appreciate it but always tell her to stop 😂 this kinda made me realize it’s her way of helping out. and i always feel much better in the clean space she left.
Ok I'm crying. I feel very alone and lazy when depressed, and hearing you say how hard it is to just pick up 5 pieces of clothing made me feel so seen and validated. Other people feel like picking up 5 pieces of clothing is too hard too. Thank you for this video, I needed it.
I thank the algorithm for showing me this, I am on a depression streak for over a year. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR MAKING THIS VIDEO!!. May God, the Universe or whatever you believe in bless you and multiply all of you.
To the person who wrote the initial comment requesting a video like this and to you Caroline, thank you for bringing about this type of video. I love how it mixed achievable goals and suggestions with interior design. Brilliant. And compassionate. I pray you’re able to take some of Caroline’s suggestions and that the process and end result bring peace and healing to you and your mom. ❤️
Thank you for your kind words, Jill ❤❤ Caroline's video helped sooo much and I know it's helped so many others in a similar place. Truly such a gift! The healing has commenced, as has the journey to a more inviting and cozy space 🤗 I hope you're doing well!
Caroline, you have a purpose here on earth girl, as does everyone. This episode right here is one moment where no one but you could have done what you did. You reached out beyond our devices and let us see and hear and feel how we can realign and take another step. Comes from your pain and your gains and only through YOUR personality in how to execute the words and attitude that drive it home into our hearts. I’ve read allllll the comments and am happy to report that you made an impact. And I hope our energy of love and appreciation can lift you and help you see and find what you are needing in life right now. Love you friend, thank you for being alive and living your purpose. Showing us how to be brave and stand where we are and start living.
OMG, you have no idea (or maybe you do) how much I needed this today! I have struggled with depression for almost 20yrs and only recently began to get professional help. Today I was looking around my house at all the unfinished things and immediately felt overwhelmed like I wanted to hide under my blanket and pretend everything else doesn't exist. So happy I decided to watch this video because now I feel like I have a plan that will allow me to function today. So thank you for this!
Daffodil98647, I can relate to these feelings. I'm glad you're getting help. What helps me when I'm feeling overwhelmed is making a list of everything that needs to be done. I pick ONE each day that can be started and finished that day. That's my limit and I allow myself to feel good about the accomplishment. Best wishes for 2023.
I moved into a house that was essentially left hoarded out. I have made so much progress on it but six months have gone by and the space just burns me out. I work full time and this house is my side project. So much of what you said is ringing true for me. I am a man, I work as a building technician and maintenance mechanic. I have so many skills, but some days I literally can’t even vacuum and it feels like climbing a mountain. It was so refreshing to hear how you have gotten through these moments. I got the energy to mop and get rid of some art I don’t even like anymore at all. And funny enough as a man not often connected with my emotions what you said describes what I am going through so perfectly I can hardly believe it.
My dad passed away at the beggining of the pandemic….it was such a traumatic event that I experienced panic attacks and felt dead inside. I moved with my mom cause she was alone and what saved me was the rearrangement and redecoration of spaces I did in her house. Beautiful video you made! ❤️
When our neighbour/family friend passed away from cancer, his wife and children started renovating the whole house, doing A LOT of hard labour by themselves. They also made him a frame with all his memorabilia to be hung in the hallway. I think this renovation is what kept them sane, even though it took a lot of time
My dad was full of wisdom and one of his sayings was “every human relationship is an eternal responsibility” you demo that respect for others beautifully.
Same! My beast is generally more on the anxiety side>depression but still so helpful + made me teary. Love this channel. Interior design + mental health, who knew this would be such a great combo?!
This is the kindest video in all TH-cam. For all of us suffering from depression and loss, this felt like a dear friend telling us "I got you", like real support, like a long hug. Thank you, just for being you. Thank you.
You know much more about depression than me - a therapist 😅 You could be one! You are just so lovely thx for gifting us with your creative funny yet moving videos!
I'm not the person you made this video for but still seeing you talking to them made me tear up. Due to some events from 2022, I know already that this year is going to have a lot of difficult tasks for me which made me very unmotivated and kind of depressed during the last weeks. Just seeing you care so much for a random person on the internet made me somehow feel less alone and seen. Thank you for that. Love from Germany 💜
@jessicas253 You expressed almost 100% how I feel...how strange isn't?!🙂 This video content from Caroline was so spot on, no long explanations, and concrete help. So rare.
Caroline, I just gotta say: you’ve made this-the internet, the world-a better place to be. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and time with those of us you don’t even know. Appreciate you!
Commenting half for the algorithm, half because I, like a lot of people, really needed this today. January is a really difficult month for me. A lot of grief comes up and I tend to hermit myself in my space only to feel trapped and angry at myself for not taking better care of it. Thank you, Caroline. You are always the realest 💕
Yes Reagan, January I find so hard, my dad and eldest brother died, both funerals were in January. Also the weather where I live is so depressing, looking forward to spring ♥️
This is honestly one of the most helpful videos on self care for mental health / depression that I've ever seen. A few years ago I was in a really dark place with depression and also lived in a complete sh*t hole of an apartment. Slowly working on making my place look better - like as good as reasonably possible in light of the terrible bones of the place- was a big part of my self care during that time. It's hard to feel great about yourself when living in a bad space, but I also came to feel that regardless of how nice my space looks at any time in the future, the process of updating and renovating can be a boost.
I watch decorating channels all the time. I also watch several therapists on TH-cam, and yet somehow this video broke through my wall of numb and made me cry, when nothing else did. I finally felt totally appropriate emotions, but inspired by a channel I've never watched before (don't know why) and in a way I totally did not expect. Thank you from a new subscriber.
HOLE TIP! I was afraid to hang art after painting every wall in my new house. It was an overwhelming chore and I burned myself out forever for painting. So I got over that fear by hanging almost every piece of art I have with command Velcro strips. I read the weight requirements for them and I have art everywhere now. When I don’t like it or I want to move things around, I just move the art and take the command strips off. No holes, no marks. Just make sure you follow the instructions. It was truly life changing for me.
😁 command strip hooks have brought some delightful moments into my life. As I have slowly purged and organized my kitchen, and taking my time to figure out how I want to feel and move in that space (why not let my kitchen minister joy to me?), I have used them to make pot holders easy to grab, and hang up the tiny pots and pans that my husband bought and which were frustrating me because they were in the way of the pots I usually use. 😁 I can’t believe it has been more than six months since I did that and the whole cabinet works so great now! (We also added a couple of shelves so that I could grab things and put them away with one motion). every day there are certain chores I have to do whether I want to or not, whether I feel like it or not. Having things organized is like a big hug. The next Cabinet on my radar is a little tricky, but I have command hooks ready for the shish kebab skewers once I figure out my plan, and which side of the cabinet they will end up on, or on both sides. I’m saving this tricky cabinet for others to help me with. I have an organizing friend coming to stay for a month soon. Between me, her and my husband I think We can figure out a solution to make this cabinet work. my friend helped me with some cabinets last year, also. I hardly recommend doing some of these projects together. I wonder if I can get them to help me paint a room that I have been procrastinating on? I just feel so overwhelmed by it.
Caroline, you specifically responded to one subscriber, and yet with that response, you have clearly touched hundreds more (and counting). Like others, I found this video to be perfectly timed. Of all the videos of yours I've watched so far, this one might just be your best yet. Practical tips combined with compassion and understanding. Bravo! You just got a new subscriber in me.
A new year can trigger negative emotions for those of us who are prone to depressive episodes - which is the case for me this year. So this came just at the right time. Thank you, Caroline.❤
Right? It's hard to be hopeful in the middle of winter when everyone around you seems ready to tackle the new year head on. January is always hard for me.
You ain't lyin' about people/family/friends not knowing what to do or say when you are experiencing grief. A lot of clichés suddenly are regurgitated your way, which are well intentioned, but sound absolutely horrific in the context of your grief. Thank you for this video, this is so relatable.
Literally here out of desperation. I'm not sure if I'm depressed or on the verge of an anxiety attack, but I know I need to get up and clean, and just thinking about it is overwhelming. Hoping this video gives me the boost I need.
It's crazy that this video dropped when it did because I haven't felt so grey and down in literally years. Thank you for helping me start the process of getting out of that
I commented initially before I saw the whole video and I just had to come back to say what a gem you are and how generous it was to share your gifts with a grieving subscriber. It brought me to tears and it’s such a beautiful example of alchemizing your experiences with depression and turning them into light. So beautiful.
Hi. I just wanted to say thank you for making this video! People don't think about how depression can really make you feel overwhelmed in your space, unmotivated, and lonely. I'm sure this video will help someone out there; including myself! So a big thank you!
I keep thinking, "Girl, you're so... wise." Some things you mentioned are things I figured out after long, long struggles. Others are things I've heard of but never thought were "for me," like keeping a simple journal of daily ratings. The way you explained the rationale was an aha moment for me. I love how you intertwined decorating and dealing with depression. Decorating my home makes me happy, depression makes me unable to take care of my home. You have a lot and you share it, generously. Thank you!
Kindness is easy but not always shared. Today's video took me by surprise at the end. Your kindness toward a hurting viewer who randomly left you a comment of her pain shot through me. Thank you Caroline for reminding me that even a small thing can be a big thing to someone. Wishing you a happy and adventurous New Year!!
What a sweet gift to a subscriber (that we can all enjoy). As a fellow member of the ‘dead dad’s club’ I’m wishing her peace. That she hold tight to the (bitter)sweet moments where memories of him take hold. Since this is him still with you. ❤
Caroline, I started watching your videos looking for design inspiration for my space, then I stayed because your energy reminds me so much of my sister (she gives zero craps about anything or anyone getting in her way). I've come to realize that I love time spent with your videos because you let me experience an adult, female discourse that I crave. I know parasocial relationships are a hot topic, but I don't have anyone in my life who I can honestly talk with about therapy, growth, and putting in the work for yourself. You are so open and genuine, and I truly value your perspectives. Much love to you in 2023.
Caroline, you speaking to that one subscriber at the end made me instantly tear up. The kindness to do that is so special. Despite watching and thinking oh, these are great tips for me, once you told us what prompted you to make the video, I want to honour them and tell this person that this act of kindness from you is just for them and that I am so sorry for their loss as well. You are a wonderful person Caroline
I was living alone for the first time in years and nursing my wounds after a sad breakup, and I was working a lot… I went through a bad phase of depression and what pulled me out was this one week I was feeling so sick, throat sore, achey, tired.. and I went to the store, got a few simple over the counter medications, OJ for that Vitamin C, and some soup. And I went home and put on my favorite show and bundled up and slept for 2 days. I ended up nipping the sickness in the bud and it made me realize that I wasn’t nurturing myself at all. I really stopped everything and coddled myself for the first time and put myself and my needs first, whereas I normally would never have gone any extra inch to do all of that just for me.. that was 4 years ago and I still think about it all the time. Got to take care of ourselves.
Another good thing about adding lamps; they don't all have to be electric. You can have one or two battery or chargeable types mixed in for those unexpected power outages.
Amen on the paint thing! My husband have covid the beginning of 2021 and spent almost four weeks in the hospital. We weren't able to go visit him because he was in the ICU, and about three weeks in, what started out as taking down a whiteboard and patching a big ol' hole ended up being painting the whole house with lots of family and friends. We had always hated the color from the time we moved in and when my husband finally came home after almost dying alone twice, it was so nice to have it looking like a fresh start ❤
I clicked one of your videos about interior design tips and it started off with “we’re all gonna die, don’t put so much pressure on design”, something like that. I laughed and so did my mom bc the past month I can’t stop thinking about death and the purpose of life. I’m having a hard time enjoying my life but honestly appreciate how real you are, totally connected with you, you’re amazing, thank you:)
I never post comments on youtube but this was such a kind, compassionate and straightforward video. Like your best friend sitting you down and talking you through a difficult period. Have watched twice through immediately but will come back to thia video many times in the future.
Okaayyyyy I was not ready for that ending (THERE’S NO CRYING AT WORK!! 😩😩😆). This was so unbelievably loving and I know what that commenter was feeling. My father passed a few years ago and I literally felt like I could barely function. This was very heartwarming and relatable and NOT dismissive of people acknowledging where they ARE and not where other people think they SHOULD be. Love you so much for this. Blessings and happiness to you. 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽❤️❤️❤️❤️
The idea of taking all the stuff off a peice of furniture or out of a room before deciding what to put back is also a great time to dust and vacuum the empty space. Really helps me when my space needs both deep cleaning and reorganizing.
Caroline, I'm blown away by you. You spread kindness, acceptance and share raw emotions. I love that you are teaching us to give ourselves permission to be creatively free and gentle on ourselves. I'm currently recovering from brain surgery and I spend a lot of time talking to myself with encouraging words, humour and love - it's necessary. Redesigning my small place is such great therapy. Thank you for your humour and creativity which are so infectious :) Sending you love xo
I was so moved by your empathy and care here, Caroline. Even if we haven’t had a specific loss like your subscriber, all of us live with a series of losses and gifts. We are in the process of moving from a home that means so much to me and renovating an old home for our retirement. I’m a designer and so throwing myself into this reno has been a godsend, but I also sit in this current home and allow the stunning architecture to move me to tears as I soak it in. Losses and gifts along our way. Thank you for your compassion and humor.
Well the end of 2022 was not good Lots of depression days Family passed Lost job Personal relationship not doing well So 2023 kinda scares me But I’m gonna try my hardest to get out of this rut THANKS FOR SHARING
Thank you. Thank you SO much. To some, these tips may seem intuitive but it’s amazing how depression can distort EVERYTHING. Everything is heavier, harder to do, more important and subsequently more frustrating when you simply just CAN’T. I saved this to my “Favorites”, “Home Decor”, and “Mental Health” folders on TH-cam. 2022… left me so empty, I’m determined to fill my cup in 2023. Thank you for the ideas for the hard days ♥️
I've been decluttering 1 drawer or small space at a time, which has a huge impact. Today was spice rack time. That led to a drawer and small space up in my closet. Then I rest, read, take my dogs out for fun, eat some deviled eggs (Yum!) and dance a bit. My last thing of the day, which calms me, is to vacuum.
Love how relatable you are ❤ Also, you showing us the holes in your wall took me out 😂😂😂. My favorite “depression kicker” activity is vacuuming/swiffering 😂 That’s like the official marker that I’m back to being a productive adult.
wow I was so touched when you said "I know those words dont mean much, so I made you a video instead". It shows so much dedication to helping someone else feel better in their time of grief, but it also shows the level of empathy.
I live with depression and I can concur with everything you’re saying. I’ve been walking a lot the past few months and been purging unnecessary things. Yesterday i “shopped” my house and changed things up. It looks great and I feel great ! 😊
I did a MAJOR purge at the beginning of COVID after my best friend died of cancer just 12 weeks after her diagnosis. She was also my job share partner, we sang in a choir together--I saw her almost every day of the week. I don't know if the purge helped my grief, but it gave me somewhere to direct my emotions. I hope your advice helps your subscriber who is grieving. 💖
Hey Caroline, Ttown native here. When I found your channel I felt at home and I greatly appreciate your realistic approach to life. I feel like I can connect to you from a genuine place within myself and love love love your advice!
There is so much love and compassion in this 16 minute video. I am consistently blown away by this space you've created (I mean gosh, just reading through the comments and everyone is so kind and grateful), and I feel so lucky to have your content to enrich my life. It brought me to tears to hear this entire video was made for one person who was grieving; the impact goes way beyond that. Also gotta give you props for moving your entire dining room table just for thumbnail - haha you nailed it!
For depression which I’ve struggled with for years, I have low sugar dark chocolate in morning, not a cure but helps. I found a reproduction canvas painting of 2 zebras running, I got for 15 bucks at thrift shop. Makes me happy every time. I call them the 2 Henry’s dad and son running.
My uncle died in July and it didn’t occur to me how depressed I was about it until I starting digging through everything and cleaning and organizing every itch of my home. It has definitely helped as my mind was just racing.
I spend my work days with the suffering and grieving (palliative care; deeply love my work) AND I believe in the power of aesthetics as a kind of surprising ministry to the soul . . . .HOLY SH*T! Caroline! This is amazing! This video is a thoughtful and loving gift to anyone going through some dark sh*t. I already loved your whole thing but this is NEXT LEVEL. TH-cam, prepare a throne cos this b*tch is a true queen!
I like having an audiobook on while I’m doing some chore. It keeps me from spiraling, I think. Another tiny buy would be a scent. Something that feels fresh and maybe a bit indulgent but can be a good way to pivot your attention for a moment here and there. Washing your bedding and including like a scented fabric softener that you love can be a good way to do this as well. Or, like a new scent of deodorant, bath soap, hand soap. You know how your laundry doesn’t “smell” to you? Yet, you can smell other peoples laundry when going past their house or whatever. Like their dryer vents. Just changing your scented products or adding one in (if you’re not allergic) can make you take notice of it. And this last one could just be me, but hanging up one of the little crystal suncatchers in a sunny window in your home can put a smile on your face whenever it produces rainbows inside.
Thank you! I'm crying now, I'm deeply emotional right now because I've just broken up with my husband ... I just want to redecorate my home, we've lived here for 10 years, and I'm ready to refresh a little. You are the best, Caroline, thank you!!!!!
Thank you so much for your honesty and generosity of spirit, Caroline. ❤ As someone who has struggled with honoring difficult emotions, it took me a long time to fully live the truth that strength and vulnerability are two sides of the same coin. Alongside your whip-smart wit and astute - and often hilarious - observations you're also incredibly kindhearted and compassionate; you're making a bigger impact than you may ever know. Thank you.
The best as always. Not really a design tip but sometimes just washing something helps. All the spoons, just the bathroom sink, it somehow seems to help. I think the trick is small steps towards being more comfortable and making a decision that feels for you, by you and in your control. Great video, thank you!
I’m 67 and have managed GAD since I was 36. I wasn’t expecting this vid and I thank you for it. You gave me a lot of good tips I haven’t thought about when I’m in that state. When your bed grabs a hold of you and won’t let go 😊😢TFS❤️
Oh my god! The comment at the end to the subscriber that lost her dad… I know you think it didn’t mean much… it meant everything. I couldn’t figure out why I was thinking about my mom so much during this video. But you nailed so many things on the head. THANK YOU.
This video spoke to me right at my core. As a new mum with a one and a half year old I have struggled since the day my beautiful daughter was born to feel in control of my life in general but my home in particular. Saving this video for future reference as the most valuable content that any interior design channel has ever brought to me. Thank you so much!
I so relate! I realized after I had kids that I am cool with doing all the mom things, but it’s really hard for me to be a housekeeper AND a mom at the same time. Thank goodness I’ve been around young families for a long time (as a nanny before I had kids) and I know that the messy chaotic young kids years are temporary. My youngest is 5 and I am starting to be better at keeping my house clean now. It’s not worth it to try to push yourself to have an Instagram worthy house when your kids are young - cool if someone can pull it off naturally or with help - but I say embrace the snuggly days while they are here
@@TavsKnitspace thank you so much! It's good to be reminded that things get easier slowly. Being a mum came so easily and naturally to me that I think I assumed that I could then just be super mum and built up far too many expectations for myself!
@@wplants9793 yeah the mum things are fine, like you say it's the combination of mum things plus housework!! Thanks for the reminder to just enjoy, the snuggly days do go so fast
Caroline!!! I NEEDED this video! I get overwhelmed and down so easily! These are GREAT tips!!! Omg, THANK YOU! (Also, glad you left in the upstairs neighbor flushing the toilet-cracked me up, and it’s very real. That’s life- inserting absurdity while we are trying to do something important (recording videos, etc) 😂
My fiancé lost his dad right before Christmas 2022. I just found this video today but the fact that it was your first video of 2023 made me cry like a baby. I wish 7 months ago me had seen this then, but watching it now brought me back to that place and reminded me that it gets better. Thank you ❤
I spontaneously cleaned my microwave yesterday and am still bragging about it to my husband. Total self-esteem booster.
I brag about cleaning the tub! 😂 totally feel you!!
I always brag about cleaning the floor (hate doing it).. 😌
I did the sink! Hard water stains be damned!
Same! Every time I open the door, I am blinded and it’s awesome!
Love. Please rest until 2024
Just me, a 40+ single dad who lost his dad, watching an interior design vid on a Friday, totally not crying 😢 Thanks for this, Caroline.
hang in there, it does not stop hurting, but it gets painful less often. 3 years later after losing my dad I still think random people in the street its him
Chris, my sincerest condolences. You are not alone by any means.
It's funny how many people may have landed on Caroline's video and were not likely searching for it, but they certainly needed it when they found it.
It's even funnier how profound and impactful the support of absolute strangers can be during a time of need, which gives a person a sense of hope and that there are still good people out there who genuinely care about supporting others when they need help.
Caroline certainly did that for me in this video, as well as for many people who don't even know her. Although I don't know you, I do have compassion for how you've been feeling, and hope that you've been able to find some comfort during this time, and will continue find comfort and joy throughout your life 🙂
🩵🩵🩵
You are worth some self-care.
Thank you for this video!!!! So very helpful!!! I especially loved the idea of the daily micro journal. Your videos are fabulous!!! Please don't ever leave us. ❤😊
Hey again Caroline ❤ I am sitting here crying like a lil baby. You really went above and beyond in helping me find a way to help myself out and therefore help my Mom. Each tip was so thoughtful and dare I say genius. I didn’t even think to “shop” around her place to move the colours from one room to another. I can’t wait to go for a walk and come back feeling ready to organize at least 5 things. It’s much less scary when you break it down into bite sizes.
This video genuinely made my heart happy for the first time in a while. Through the tears, I felt a burst of energy that I haven’t felt for the past month of loss. Your humour and compassion throughout the video were like a hug from an old friend, tbh. Thank you, sincerely, with all my heart. For your time, effort and empathy. Even though we’re all strangers, I feel so connected and supported ❤ Happy new year Caroline, thank you times a million & I hope you’re doing well!
Edit: Your sweet video brought me up from a shitty 2/10 to a precious 8/10 and for that I am thankful 🤗
Big hug to you, Jessie! Thank you for your previous comment that ended up not only helping you, but all of us as well (Caroline included).
Ah man I didn’t even know if you were still on TH-cam🥲I had no idea if this video would get to you, I’m so glad that it did. Thank you for putting it in motion. I’d like to call out that you reached out, when it felt hardest, and said “this is what would help”. That’s the hardest step. It doesn’t guarantee the results we expect, but eventually, I think it gets to a safe place. Thank you for opening up as you did. I really have been thinking about you and your message for weeks. I hope you are being kind to yourself in an unknown time. Love to you friend ❤️
Jessie you are in my thoughts. I have been where you are and I am sending hugs your way. ❤❤❤
This is my second viewing of this video and I had no idea until the end, like the rest of the viewers that this was specifically to answer and be helpful to you… and I cried like a baby. I lost my dad and the months during the diagnosis and loss was a vacuum like no other.
I send you so much love and hope that you find the memories of good times when you feel the unbearable quiet hits.
Can’t stress it enough… you’ve got an entire community sending you love and are praying for your heart to find peace as the moments come when you need it.
💜🙏🏻💜
~N
This is so, so wonderful to read. Caroline, you're fostering community :*)
A quick tip to anyone out there who checked out when she said to take a walk because you're like me and spend about 50 hours on your feet at work in one week and the idea of going for a 15 minute walk sounds painful, try sitting outside for 15 minutes and staring at trees and little birds and squirrels.
15:35 I was expecting her to say “what’s coming next is better” but I love how she said “what’s coming next is unknown and full of possibilities”… it was a nice reminder to myself that I don’t always have to keep outgoing myself…
I had the same experience. She’s a real one.
I had the same thought. It was so honest. We don't have to pretend it's going to be better, but we can say that it's got potential. The fact that it's a chance, that it's not pre-ordained... and we're not filling that space with false platitudes. It was perfect.
The honesty is everything
As an Occupational Therapist, the advice you have provided is exactly what I educate my clients on. However, I love that your video is from lived experience AND that it’s not heavy and all about depression or low energy. Thank you for this. I have saved it in my therapist tool box and will be sharing with appropriate clients who would benefit and appreciate your honesty and compassion.
Wow this is so rewarding to hear. I have a lot easier time implementing it in video format than in real life…😂but it feels so good to share. It’s all a work in progress ❤️
@@Caroline_Winkler life is a work in progress for all of us 👍🏽
@@Caroline_Winkler ah, yes Caroline, it is all a work in progress! Even for me at 65 years on this earth! It is wonderful that you are able to vlog what so many need to hear. Big hug.
As an.
Funny, I’m an OT too and love Caroline’s clever ideas.
This was the kindest thing you could have done for that subscriber. That sweet deed is now rippling through the rest of our lives. God bless you, Caroline.
Ok this one is going viral. Accessible truth spoken here. You are not just decorating, You are now changing lives and thought patterns. You are a rock star!
x 1000
So glad it resonated ❤put my heart in this one
@@Caroline_Winkler Oh we can tell
Exactly my thoughts, not only does she give us good ideas and simple things to do, she's speaking from her own experiences and really put her heartfelt emotion into it as well. Caroline ~ decorating therapist!!! Love her!
@@marybeth23 Caroline, decorating therapist! Love it! Love her!
I know this is an older video and you probably won't even see this comment, but I just wanna say I'm grateful you take the emotional component of desgning your space into consideration. A few months ago my dad passed away and I inherited my family home and I am preparing to move in next year. It is such a wild mix of feelings dealing with this. This place is so familiar to me, but it also feels strange. I am really sad about the reasons why I own this place now, but I am also very excited to have the opportunity to design a whole new home. Sometimes I feel like I want to get rid of everything and the next moment I wanna keep everything as is. It's such a roller coaster... and that's okay. I am watching a bunch of your videos and they help me a lot and I wanna say thank you for that 💕
Hey, hope you are doing well. Tell us how the home makeover is going on.. all the best wishes to you
@@cb5284 That is very sweet of you. It's going okay, I'm taking my time with it. I've sold some stuff, donated a few things. I got help from my partner calling the donation place, because if made me feel bad and I dreaded doing it myself. There's a few items I definitely want to keep as a family heirloom and some I still can't decide on, but taking off the pressure of myself to decide right away is helping a lot. Also decided to take my time finding new items so I make sure I'm buying them because I'm actually in love with them and not just because I need them right away. Yesterday I finally found dining room chairs that I adore and can now replace the old ones from my dad. It's still a process, but not as much of a roller coaster anymore :)
@cb5284 I think I replied to this like a week ago, but it seems my answer didn't post for some reason. Thanks for your kind words. I've sold some things, donated some and am keeping some that I either love and wanna keep as a family heirloom and there's also stuff I'm not sure about yet. Taking off the pressure of having to do and decide on everything all at once is a big relieve. Sometimes it's still emotional, but it's becoming less of a roller coaster I think.
@choupette_44 I'm sorry for your loss. If you can do that at all, best advice I can give is to take your time. You don't need to do everything at once or decide everything right away. If things get emotional it's okay to take a break or do something different for a while, even if it seems random. You got this!
When I felt depressed and overwhelmed in my small space, I realized it was visual clutter. But I have a lot of books and art supplies in a tiny place! I have them all on shelves against adjacent walls and it can be a bit much. So I hung two layers of curtains from the ceiling, a solid layer and a sheer detailed layer, and just pulled the curtains on what I didn’t want to see! It was a game changer.
Great idea!!!
What a great solution!
That is genius
I have a tiny room and while I love all my stuff I don't always love looking at it
But it's still gonna be there, lurking...
@jamieandrick6541 it's just a temporary measure, it can't help in long term. Only decluttering can do that. Learned that the hard way.
I can’t believe how much I needed this today. Just moved to a new area, started a new job, living in a temporary space. I’m sad and hopeful and lonely and proud and all the things. This video, your words, reminded me why I made the choices that led me here and that however I’m feeling at any given time is temporary. Thanks for doing what you do.
That is a lotttt of newness. The unknown is the scariest, easy to mentally torture yourself there. And it’s also where all the good things happen❤️but of course you know that, that’s why you made those moves. I hope you are able to find enough small comforts for yourself in the mean time while you wait to reap all the rewards of these changes. Hang in there friend ❤
I like that you use “and” instead of “but” my therapist taught me that, too - you can feel conflicting emotions all at once and they’re all true and all valid. Mental health game recognize game 😂😅
@@steelynash5894wow thank you for pointing that out! i feel mindblown lol, i don’t know why i never thought of it that way. you can be happy and nervous, sad and hopeful, etc, without having to say “but”
Word for word, this is my exact situation. It's refreshing to know I am not alone.
Congrats & huggs on your new life.
I’ve never felt so seen and understood by someone on TH-cam talking about interior design/self-care before ❤ You were right; this one was a banger.
😂❤️thanks bb
What a lovely, thoughtful thing to do. I lost my Mum a few weeks ago and your video reminded me of the kindness that so often comes from strangers, someone we 'know' on TH-cam, a neighbour we haven't spoken to before, someone in the coffee shop or a proper smile from someone that reaches their eyes and makes you feel as if they sense your pain even when no words pass between you. Thank you for being kind. x
May her soul rest in peace 🤲🏼
I lost my mom about six months ago. I know the grief you are experiencing. Sending a virtual hug
I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my momma when I was 18 and it's a crusher. Miss her still so much. A kid always needs their mom. Sending you so much love
So sorry for your loss. 💚
I can’t imagine what you’re going through. And I’m so sorry. Thank you for sharing this piece of light with me and with everyone despite it all. Biggest hug to you
She is definitely not lying with the lamps! TL;DR - I changed this space so that it no longer reminds me of him or us together or the bad OR good times we had. This space is now completely ME, the way I've imagined a cozy space while living alone. And because of that, I'm starting to have more good days and fewer bad ones.
I'm recovering from a 9-year...thing (don't even know what to call it) with a man who has Narcissistic Personality Disorder and who could, at times, be very aggressive and occasionally violent. The bouts of depression and grief and shame and guilt (at myself) coming out of something like that is REAL... especially when that person lived in the same house and certain areas bring up messed up memories of things that happened.
SO...I made the decision a few days ago to completely redecorate the living area and hallway. We just moved into this house not that long ago and so we hadn't really gotten into furnishing and decorating these areas yet. That's actually a GOOD thing because the living room is still mostly empty, which means it's easier to actually envision what I want. We had picked out a few paintings and lamps together that he paid for, but he knew how homey it was starting to feel to me, so of course he packed them to take with him, pretty much leaving the living room bare. So, after really thinking about how I want this room to feel when I walk in from a long, tiring day, I went out and picked a few paintings on my own, bought a couple more that coordinate with those from Amazon, and also bought 2 standing lamps. They're simple lamps, but they're kind of elegant. They're perfect for a situation when you want your own (and any visitors') eyes to focus on the paintings and overall vibe, but they're kind of becoming my favorite things about this room! My favorite thing about these lamps? They have 3 light "warmth" settings. So I can change the warmth of the light's color depending on the mood I'm in or the vibe I'm going for. Because I'm going for the vibe of a rustic cabin with a country girl's touch, when the lights are set on the warmer tone the room looks more old-fashioned and rustic. When I use the cooler tones it still looks rustic, but more modern (and a little brighter). So I use the cooler tones when I'm feeling those bouts of depression coming on (the brighter feeling is a big pick-me-up) and the warmer tone when I'm feeling mellow and just hanging out reading or cooking or watching something.
Sorry that was so long! The main point is that I changed this space so that it no longer reminds me of him or us together or the bad OR good times we had. This space is now completely ME, the way I've imagined a cozy space while living alone. And because of that, I'm starting to have more good days and fewer bad ones because the space I've created feels like the comforting arms of a good, solid friend I can fall into and feel whatever I'm feeling in peace and safety before enjoying a little hot tea & sympathy. ♥️
“You’re surviving and I’m proud of you,” instantly made me cry so…that’s how I’m doing right now!
Sharing in case this helps others in the comments. I realized **SCENT** can make a big difference. Yesterday I realized that I associate the scent in my apartment with depression. I put the diffuser outside and felt a noticeable difference. It was a great scent but it has been with me in some low times recently, so getting rid of it helped me separate out of that feeling a teeny tiny bit.
I like candles that smell of baked goods because it smells like I actually put effort into making something. 😅
This is a great tip. Powerful advice. I always think about the positive memories and feelings that a scent can evoke but I never saw the connection to the negative that can occur.
Yesss, open the windows and/or doors get some fresh air in and spritz something 🧘🏼♀️
Totally agree.. I recently started to associate happy memories with some scents, so whenever I am in a state of drawning myself into the black hole of sadness (happen quite often), I try to pull up those 'happy scents' to simply remind that I am actually capable of feeling happiness
AHHH, yes, thank you for the reminder!
So timely. My youngest girl is going through a dark space right now. Yesterday we went in cleaned out her dust bunnies, and did laundry. She took down her little Christmas tree, and then we got out of the house. Really helped her focus out for a while. Baby steps.
you are doing such a good thing for her by helping her take those baby steps!! hoping she makes it through soon, i cant tell you how important that kind of support can be
you sound like an incredible mom :')
It made me tear up hearing you take care of your girl through tough times, my mom would've told me being sad is pointless. You're a great mom 🥹
You sound like a lovely mum. I don't have this kind of support and it's awful. This is what mums are all about, sadly mine has no empathy and doesn't understand depression at all. Love to you and your daughter ❤️
you are great. my mom does this in my university dorm for me when she visits and i always appreciate it but always tell her to stop 😂 this kinda made me realize it’s her way of helping out. and i always feel much better in the clean space she left.
Ok I'm crying. I feel very alone and lazy when depressed, and hearing you say how hard it is to just pick up 5 pieces of clothing made me feel so seen and validated. Other people feel like picking up 5 pieces of clothing is too hard too. Thank you for this video, I needed it.
I thank the algorithm for showing me this, I am on a depression streak for over a year. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR MAKING THIS VIDEO!!. May God, the Universe or whatever you believe in bless you and multiply all of you.
To the person who wrote the initial comment requesting a video like this and to you Caroline, thank you for bringing about this type of video. I love how it mixed achievable goals and suggestions with interior design. Brilliant. And compassionate. I pray you’re able to take some of Caroline’s suggestions and that the process and end result bring peace and healing to you and your mom. ❤️
Thank you for your kind words, Jill ❤❤ Caroline's video helped sooo much and I know it's helped so many others in a similar place. Truly such a gift! The healing has commenced, as has the journey to a more inviting and cozy space 🤗 I hope you're doing well!
Caroline, you have a purpose here on earth girl, as does everyone. This episode right here is one moment where no one but you could have done what you did. You reached out beyond our devices and let us see and hear and feel how we can realign and take another step. Comes from your pain and your gains and only through YOUR personality in how to execute the words and attitude that drive it home into our hearts. I’ve read allllll the comments and am happy to report that you made an impact. And I hope our energy of love and appreciation can lift you and help you see and find what you are needing in life right now. Love you friend, thank you for being alive and living your purpose. Showing us how to be brave and stand where we are and start living.
What a beautiful true comment. I hope she sees it as well.
How do you know we have a purpose?
well put ! AGREE ~
OMG, you have no idea (or maybe you do) how much I needed this today! I have struggled with depression for almost 20yrs and only recently began to get professional help. Today I was looking around my house at all the unfinished things and immediately felt overwhelmed like I wanted to hide under my blanket and pretend everything else doesn't exist. So happy I decided to watch this video because now I feel like I have a plan that will allow me to function today. So thank you for this!
Isn’t she great?!
Daffodil98647, I can relate to these feelings. I'm glad you're getting help. What helps me when I'm feeling overwhelmed is making a list of everything that needs to be done. I pick ONE each day that can be started and finished that day. That's my limit and I allow myself to feel good about the accomplishment. Best wishes for 2023.
Reward yourself for even the small changes and improvements you make! You got this!! You’re not alone!
get well soon sweetheart! 🌷
@@jsmith5509 great advice
The niche of interior decorating combined with mental health is definitely your wheelhouse. Thank you for this
I moved into a house that was essentially left hoarded out. I have made so much progress on it but six months have gone by and the space just burns me out. I work full time and this house is my side project. So much of what you said is ringing true for me. I am a man, I work as a building technician and maintenance mechanic. I have so many skills, but some days I literally can’t even vacuum and it feels like climbing a mountain. It was so refreshing to hear how you have gotten through these moments. I got the energy to mop and get rid of some art I don’t even like anymore at all. And funny enough as a man not often connected with my emotions what you said describes what I am going through so perfectly I can hardly believe it.
My dad passed away at the beggining of the pandemic….it was such a traumatic event that I experienced panic attacks and felt dead inside. I moved with my mom cause she was alone and what saved me was the rearrangement and redecoration of spaces I did in her house. Beautiful video you made! ❤️
♥️😇
When our neighbour/family friend passed away from cancer, his wife and children started renovating the whole house, doing A LOT of hard labour by themselves. They also made him a frame with all his memorabilia to be hung in the hallway. I think this renovation is what kept them sane, even though it took a lot of time
I hope you're doing better now x
@@jodiblackman7838 much better, thank you!
🕊
My dad was full of wisdom and one of his sayings was “every human relationship is an eternal responsibility” you demo that respect for others beautifully.
Like, as someone who deals with depression this video brought tears to my eyes, cannot tell you why. You're a genuinely heart warming person.
Same! My beast is generally more on the anxiety side>depression but still so helpful + made me teary.
Love this channel. Interior design + mental health, who knew this would be such a great combo?!
Same😭
Same!! I’m even “ok” right now, but this got to me (in a good way).
Maybe relief? Tears can wash you from inside, "keep your interior clean". ❤️💧🌞🌈
Same here
That ending made me emotional.
This is the kindest video in all TH-cam. For all of us suffering from depression and loss, this felt like a dear friend telling us "I got you", like real support, like a long hug. Thank you, just for being you. Thank you.
You know much more about depression than me - a therapist 😅 You could be one! You are just so lovely thx for gifting us with your creative funny yet moving videos!
I'm not the person you made this video for but still seeing you talking to them made me tear up. Due to some events from 2022, I know already that this year is going to have a lot of difficult tasks for me which made me very unmotivated and kind of depressed during the last weeks. Just seeing you care so much for a random person on the internet made me somehow feel less alone and seen. Thank you for that. Love from Germany 💜
@jessicas253 You expressed almost 100% how I feel...how strange isn't?!🙂 This video content from Caroline was so spot on, no long explanations, and concrete help. So rare.
I believe in you. And I think 2023 will be less daunting in reality than in our thoughts. Sending love.
@@aeconiglio That's so kind! 💜Much appreciated! Thank you! Love to you as well!
Caroline, I just gotta say: you’ve made this-the internet, the world-a better place to be. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and time with those of us you don’t even know. Appreciate you!
Commenting half for the algorithm, half because I, like a lot of people, really needed this today. January is a really difficult month for me. A lot of grief comes up and I tend to hermit myself in my space only to feel trapped and angry at myself for not taking better care of it. Thank you, Caroline. You are always the realest 💕
Yes Reagan, January I find so hard, my dad and eldest brother died, both funerals were in January. Also the weather where I live is so depressing, looking forward to spring ♥️
This is honestly one of the most helpful videos on self care for mental health / depression that I've ever seen. A few years ago I was in a really dark place with depression and also lived in a complete sh*t hole of an apartment. Slowly working on making my place look better - like as good as reasonably possible in light of the terrible bones of the place- was a big part of my self care during that time. It's hard to feel great about yourself when living in a bad space, but I also came to feel that regardless of how nice my space looks at any time in the future, the process of updating and renovating can be a boost.
I watch decorating channels all the time. I also watch several therapists on TH-cam, and yet somehow this video broke through my wall of numb and made me cry, when nothing else did. I finally felt totally appropriate emotions, but inspired by a channel I've never watched before (don't know why) and in a way I totally did not expect.
Thank you from a new subscriber.
I hope you are feeling well. Do what feels right for you, not what you think you should do. Sending love 💕
HOLE TIP! I was afraid to hang art after painting every wall in my new house. It was an overwhelming chore and I burned myself out forever for painting. So I got over that fear by hanging almost every piece of art I have with command Velcro strips. I read the weight requirements for them and I have art everywhere now. When I don’t like it or I want to move things around, I just move the art and take the command strips off. No holes, no marks. Just make sure you follow the instructions. It was truly life changing for me.
Yes! I command strip everything. It's the best!!
I agree and go through command strips and hooks like crazy! Definitely recommend for anyone who is afraid of holes in the walls!
I didn't have a drill in my house and command strips worked like a miracle. Art still hanging after few months.
😁 command strip hooks have brought some delightful moments into my life. As I have slowly purged and organized my kitchen, and taking my time to figure out how I want to feel and move in that space (why not let my kitchen minister joy to me?), I have used them to make pot holders easy to grab, and hang up the tiny pots and pans that my husband bought and which were frustrating me because they were in the way of the pots I usually use. 😁 I can’t believe it has been more than six months since I did that and the whole cabinet works so great now! (We also added a couple of shelves so that I could grab things and put them away with one motion).
every day there are certain chores I have to do whether I want to or not, whether I feel like it or not. Having things organized is like a big hug. The next Cabinet on my radar is a little tricky, but I have command hooks ready for the shish kebab skewers once I figure out my plan, and which side of the cabinet they will end up on, or on both sides. I’m saving this tricky cabinet for others to help me with. I have an organizing friend coming to stay for a month soon. Between me, her and my husband I think We can figure out a solution to make this cabinet work. my friend helped me with some cabinets last year, also. I hardly recommend doing some of these projects together. I wonder if I can get them to help me paint a room that I have been procrastinating on? I just feel so overwhelmed by it.
Caroline, you specifically responded to one subscriber, and yet with that response, you have clearly touched hundreds more (and counting). Like others, I found this video to be perfectly timed. Of all the videos of yours I've watched so far, this one might just be your best yet. Practical tips combined with compassion and understanding. Bravo! You just got a new subscriber in me.
A new year can trigger negative emotions for those of us who are prone to depressive episodes - which is the case for me this year. So this came just at the right time. Thank you, Caroline.❤
Also due to S.A.D.
Right? It's hard to be hopeful in the middle of winter when everyone around you seems ready to tackle the new year head on. January is always hard for me.
You ain't lyin' about people/family/friends not knowing what to do or say when you are experiencing grief. A lot of clichés suddenly are regurgitated your way, which are well intentioned, but sound absolutely horrific in the context of your grief.
Thank you for this video, this is so relatable.
Literally here out of desperation. I'm not sure if I'm depressed or on the verge of an anxiety attack, but I know I need to get up and clean, and just thinking about it is overwhelming. Hoping this video gives me the boost I need.
It's crazy that this video dropped when it did because I haven't felt so grey and down in literally years. Thank you for helping me start the process of getting out of that
Hold on and keep going ♥️🙏🏼 i experience the same! Love from the Netherlands 🫂
I am a therapist and you best believe I will be sharing this with some of my clients. This will serve so many people. Love it!❤
I commented initially before I saw the whole video and I just had to come back to say what a gem you are and how generous it was to share your gifts with a grieving subscriber. It brought me to tears and it’s such a beautiful example of alchemizing your experiences with depression and turning them into light. So beautiful.
The look on your face after you said go for a walk it’s going to be ok, brought tears to my eyes. Your look conveyed such empathy.
Hi. I just wanted to say thank you for making this video! People don't think about how depression can really make you feel overwhelmed in your space, unmotivated, and lonely. I'm sure this video will help someone out there; including myself! So a big thank you!
I tell my children all the time, “love yourself exactly where you are”. Self love is so important!
I keep thinking, "Girl, you're so... wise." Some things you mentioned are things I figured out after long, long struggles. Others are things I've heard of but never thought were "for me," like keeping a simple journal of daily ratings. The way you explained the rationale was an aha moment for me. I love how you intertwined decorating and dealing with depression. Decorating my home makes me happy, depression makes me unable to take care of my home. You have a lot and you share it, generously. Thank you!
Kindness is easy but not always shared. Today's video took me by surprise at the end. Your kindness toward a hurting viewer who randomly left you a comment of her pain shot through me. Thank you Caroline for reminding me that even a small thing can be a big thing to someone. Wishing you a happy and adventurous New Year!!
My exact thoughts and my same reaction at the end. I’m an even bigger Caroline fan now than I was before. So honest and caring!
What a sweet gift to a subscriber (that we can all enjoy). As a fellow member of the ‘dead dad’s club’ I’m wishing her peace. That she hold tight to the (bitter)sweet moments where memories of him take hold. Since this is him still with you. ❤
So sweet. Sending you love, Monica ❤
Just discovered this channel recently and I'm tearing up over how kind and understanding she always is in her videos
Caroline, I started watching your videos looking for design inspiration for my space, then I stayed because your energy reminds me so much of my sister (she gives zero craps about anything or anyone getting in her way). I've come to realize that I love time spent with your videos because you let me experience an adult, female discourse that I crave.
I know parasocial relationships are a hot topic, but I don't have anyone in my life who I can honestly talk with about therapy, growth, and putting in the work for yourself. You are so open and genuine, and I truly value your perspectives. Much love to you in 2023.
Ok wow, how did this make me cry? You're a treasure, Caroline.
Fellow DC resident! I always watch you on saturdays with my morning coffee. Always makes me feel a little less alone!
Caroline, you speaking to that one subscriber at the end made me instantly tear up. The kindness to do that is so special. Despite watching and thinking oh, these are great tips for me, once you told us what prompted you to make the video, I want to honour them and tell this person that this act of kindness from you is just for them and that I am so sorry for their loss as well. You are a wonderful person Caroline
I'm a YT addict and this is hands down the best channel out I've came across... Thank you Caroline, you are awesome!
I was living alone for the first time in years and nursing my wounds after a sad breakup, and I was working a lot… I went through a bad phase of depression and what pulled me out was this one week I was feeling so sick, throat sore, achey, tired.. and I went to the store, got a few simple over the counter medications, OJ for that Vitamin C, and some soup. And I went home and put on my favorite show and bundled up and slept for 2 days. I ended up nipping the sickness in the bud and it made me realize that I wasn’t nurturing myself at all.
I really stopped everything and coddled myself for the first time and put myself and my needs first, whereas I normally would never have gone any extra inch to do all of that just for me.. that was 4 years ago and I still think about it all the time.
Got to take care of ourselves.
Caroline, I don’t know if you realize how much this particular vlog means to many of us. Thank you.
What????? How the heck did you know the EXACT video I need right now? Caroline for President! 🇱🇷💙😄
aw man im sorry to hear that. hang in there. man, i think its something about january. GO FOR A WALK ❤
@@Caroline_Winkler Always! Walks are mandatory! Thank you for your inspiration.
I have to watch all TH-cam on 1.5x speed, except Caroline. You're such a whirlwind of words i have to sometimes slow the video down 😂
haha this is literally why ive learned to put in "transition slides" to make the chatter even somewhat intolerable.
Same! ❤
Another good thing about adding lamps; they don't all have to be electric. You can have one or two battery or chargeable types mixed in for those unexpected power outages.
Amen on the paint thing! My husband have covid the beginning of 2021 and spent almost four weeks in the hospital. We weren't able to go visit him because he was in the ICU, and about three weeks in, what started out as taking down a whiteboard and patching a big ol' hole ended up being painting the whole house with lots of family and friends. We had always hated the color from the time we moved in and when my husband finally came home after almost dying alone twice, it was so nice to have it looking like a fresh start ❤
i havent left my apartment in a week and have spent all day everyday on youtube or my phone- this was a much needed video right now
I clicked one of your videos about interior design tips and it started off with “we’re all gonna die, don’t put so much pressure on design”, something like that. I laughed and so did my mom bc the past month I can’t stop thinking about death and the purpose of life. I’m having a hard time enjoying my life but honestly appreciate how real you are, totally connected with you, you’re amazing, thank you:)
I never post comments on youtube but this was such a kind, compassionate and straightforward video. Like your best friend sitting you down and talking you through a difficult period. Have watched twice through immediately but will come back to thia video many times in the future.
Okaayyyyy I was not ready for that ending (THERE’S NO CRYING AT WORK!! 😩😩😆). This was so unbelievably loving and I know what that commenter was feeling. My father passed a few years ago and I literally felt like I could barely function. This was very heartwarming and relatable and NOT dismissive of people acknowledging where they ARE and not where other people think they SHOULD be. Love you so much for this. Blessings and happiness to you. 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽❤️❤️❤️❤️
My Mother passed away two years ago. I still feel lost
The idea of taking all the stuff off a peice of furniture or out of a room before deciding what to put back is also a great time to dust and vacuum the empty space. Really helps me when my space needs both deep cleaning and reorganizing.
Caroline, I'm blown away by you. You spread kindness, acceptance and share raw emotions. I love that you are teaching us to give ourselves permission to be creatively free and gentle on ourselves. I'm currently recovering from brain surgery and I spend a lot of time talking to myself with encouraging words, humour and love - it's necessary. Redesigning my small place is such great therapy. Thank you for your humour and creativity which are so infectious :) Sending you love xo
I wish you a quick recovery and complete healing. 🙂
Recover well and take good care! Nell x
Take care!❤
@@thesnoopydance645 Thank you, I wish you happiness 🌼:)
@@tasticola Thank you Nell, I wish you a very happy new year :)
I was so moved by your empathy and care here, Caroline. Even if we haven’t had a specific loss like your subscriber, all of us live with a series of losses and gifts. We are in the process of moving from a home that means so much to me and renovating an old home for our retirement. I’m a designer and so throwing myself into this reno has been a godsend, but I also sit in this current home and allow the stunning architecture to move me to tears as I soak it in. Losses and gifts along our way. Thank you for your compassion and humor.
Well the end of 2022 was not good
Lots of depression days
Family passed
Lost job
Personal relationship not doing well
So 2023 kinda scares me
But I’m gonna try my hardest to get out of this rut
THANKS FOR SHARING
Thank you. Thank you SO much. To some, these tips may seem intuitive but it’s amazing how depression can distort EVERYTHING. Everything is heavier, harder to do, more important and subsequently more frustrating when you simply just CAN’T.
I saved this to my “Favorites”, “Home Decor”, and “Mental Health” folders on TH-cam. 2022… left me so empty, I’m determined to fill my cup in 2023.
Thank you for the ideas for the hard days ♥️
Not Caroline making me cry at the end of the video.
Thank you for your sincerity, kindness and genuineness!
I've been decluttering 1 drawer or small space at a time, which has a huge impact. Today was spice rack time. That led to a drawer and small space up in my closet. Then I rest, read, take my dogs out for fun, eat some deviled eggs (Yum!) and dance a bit. My last thing of the day, which calms me, is to vacuum.
Love how relatable you are ❤ Also, you showing us the holes in your wall took me out 😂😂😂. My favorite “depression kicker” activity is vacuuming/swiffering 😂 That’s like the official marker that I’m back to being a productive adult.
Mine is dishes in the dishwasher, outta the sink & off the counter. 🫶
Mine too! When I've come out of anxiety/depression/pity party kick, first thing I do is sweep and vacuum.
wow I was so touched when you said "I know those words dont mean much, so I made you a video instead". It shows so much dedication to helping someone else feel better in their time of grief, but it also shows the level of empathy.
When you told me everything was going to be OK, I almost burst into tears because I very much feel NOT OK today. Thank you.
I'm a therapist and I really loved this video. You did a great job!
I live with depression and I can concur with everything you’re saying. I’ve been walking a lot the past few months and been purging unnecessary things. Yesterday i “shopped” my house and changed things up. It looks great and I feel great ! 😊
That’s frickin’ awesome 🤩
Good for you. Hope you have a good week. ❤❤ Buy yourself some fresh flowers too xx
Oh Caroline, between this and Not For Everyone, thank you for your vulnerability and helpfulness. PS your necklace is stinkin cute! ❤️
Oh god I’m so glad you’re liking the POD! It’s a whirlwind 🥲❤️and thank you!
I second all that Nic S said! 😊
I too, was loving that necklace!!!
I'm 35 seconds into this video, dear sweet and wonderful Caroline - I just had to immediately send you a hug and a kiss xo
I did a MAJOR purge at the beginning of COVID after my best friend died of cancer just 12 weeks after her diagnosis. She was also my job share partner, we sang in a choir together--I saw her almost every day of the week. I don't know if the purge helped my grief, but it gave me somewhere to direct my emotions. I hope your advice helps your subscriber who is grieving. 💖
This was an amazing gift of kindness to all of your followers. Thank you Caroline.
Hey Caroline, Ttown native here. When I found your channel I felt at home and I greatly appreciate your realistic approach to life. I feel like I can connect to you from a genuine place within myself and love love love your advice!
Sending love to the person you made this for, and to you for making it. Your channel is such a lovely place ❤
There is so much love and compassion in this 16 minute video. I am consistently blown away by this space you've created (I mean gosh, just reading through the comments and everyone is so kind and grateful), and I feel so lucky to have your content to enrich my life. It brought me to tears to hear this entire video was made for one person who was grieving; the impact goes way beyond that. Also gotta give you props for moving your entire dining room table just for thumbnail - haha you nailed it!
For depression which I’ve struggled with for years, I have low sugar dark chocolate in morning, not a cure but helps. I found a reproduction canvas painting of 2 zebras running, I got for 15 bucks at thrift shop. Makes me happy every time. I call them the 2 Henry’s dad and son running.
My uncle died in July and it didn’t occur to me how depressed I was about it until I starting digging through everything and cleaning and organizing every itch of my home. It has definitely helped as my mind was just racing.
I spend my work days with the suffering and grieving (palliative care; deeply love my work) AND I believe in the power of aesthetics as a kind of surprising ministry to the soul . . . .HOLY SH*T! Caroline! This is amazing! This video is a thoughtful and loving gift to anyone going through some dark sh*t. I already loved your whole thing but this is NEXT LEVEL. TH-cam, prepare a throne cos this b*tch is a true queen!
I like having an audiobook on while I’m doing some chore. It keeps me from spiraling, I think. Another tiny buy would be a scent. Something that feels fresh and maybe a bit indulgent but can be a good way to pivot your attention for a moment here and there. Washing your bedding and including like a scented fabric softener that you love can be a good way to do this as well. Or, like a new scent of deodorant, bath soap, hand soap. You know how your laundry doesn’t “smell” to you? Yet, you can smell other peoples laundry when going past their house or whatever. Like their dryer vents. Just changing your scented products or adding one in (if you’re not allergic) can make you take notice of it. And this last one could just be me, but hanging up one of the little crystal suncatchers in a sunny window in your home can put a smile on your face whenever it produces rainbows inside.
I’m not even depressed just raising a toddler 🙈 but this video is gold! Thank you Caroline!!! ❤
Thank you! I'm crying now, I'm deeply emotional right now because I've just broken up with my husband ... I just want to redecorate my home, we've lived here for 10 years, and I'm ready to refresh a little. You are the best, Caroline, thank you!!!!!
Thank you so much for your honesty and generosity of spirit, Caroline. ❤ As someone who has struggled with honoring difficult emotions, it took me a long time to fully live the truth that strength and vulnerability are two sides of the same coin. Alongside your whip-smart wit and astute - and often hilarious - observations you're also incredibly kindhearted and compassionate; you're making a bigger impact than you may ever know. Thank you.
Well said. Found her channel by accident and pleased that she's so much more than decorating. Really rewarding.
The best as always. Not really a design tip but sometimes just washing something helps. All the spoons, just the bathroom sink, it somehow seems to help. I think the trick is small steps towards being more comfortable and making a decision that feels for you, by you and in your control. Great video, thank you!
Thanks for being so down-to-earth. It's the little things that keep this world from seeming overwhelming.
I’m 67 and have managed GAD since I was 36. I wasn’t expecting this vid and I thank you for it. You gave me a lot of good tips I haven’t thought about when I’m in that state. When your bed grabs a hold of you and won’t let go 😊😢TFS❤️
Oh my god! The comment at the end to the subscriber that lost her dad… I know you think it didn’t mean much… it meant everything. I couldn’t figure out why I was thinking about my mom so much during this video. But you nailed so many things on the head. THANK YOU.
This video spoke to me right at my core. As a new mum with a one and a half year old I have struggled since the day my beautiful daughter was born to feel in control of my life in general but my home in particular. Saving this video for future reference as the most valuable content that any interior design channel has ever brought to me. Thank you so much!
I so relate! I realized after I had kids that I am cool with doing all the mom things, but it’s really hard for me to be a housekeeper AND a mom at the same time. Thank goodness I’ve been around young families for a long time (as a nanny before I had kids) and I know that the messy chaotic young kids years are temporary. My youngest is 5 and I am starting to be better at keeping my house clean now. It’s not worth it to try to push yourself to have an Instagram worthy house when your kids are young - cool if someone can pull it off naturally or with help - but I say embrace the snuggly days while they are here
@@TavsKnitspace thank you so much! It's good to be reminded that things get easier slowly. Being a mum came so easily and naturally to me that I think I assumed that I could then just be super mum and built up far too many expectations for myself!
@@wplants9793 yeah the mum things are fine, like you say it's the combination of mum things plus housework!! Thanks for the reminder to just enjoy, the snuggly days do go so fast
This video made me cry. Thats how I know I needed it- thank you!
Same here Janelle Caroline is like my life coach. So wise and so caring x
Caroline!!! I NEEDED this video! I get overwhelmed and down so easily! These are GREAT tips!!! Omg, THANK YOU! (Also, glad you left in the upstairs neighbor flushing the toilet-cracked me up, and it’s very real. That’s life- inserting absurdity while we are trying to do something important (recording videos, etc) 😂
My fiancé lost his dad right before Christmas 2022. I just found this video today but the fact that it was your first video of 2023 made me cry like a baby. I wish 7 months ago me had seen this then, but watching it now brought me back to that place and reminded me that it gets better. Thank you ❤
The ending was the sweetest thing ❤
Came to say I cried through the whole video. I’m not currently depressed (I think, hahaha), but the compassion and the relatability is hitting.