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Danes can be quite direct. They will not spare candour in favour of "just being honest". Polish people are the same way. Poles will also tell you off, then ... just as quickly, they will simmer down. TRUST that this American has learnt such the HAAAAARD way, haha. Danes want you to learn Danish, period! They might never come out and say such, but ... they want to see ALL foreigners at least make the effort to say stuff in the native language of the country wherein they choose to live. I mean, it is just courteous to do that. Hey, I like it when Mexicans learn to speak English if they choose to live and work in America, even though English is difficult to learn. So, I expect that American foreigners will also learn to speak the native language (or languages!) of the country wherein they have chosen to live, and work, too. And, if they do so, they will be appreciated all the more! :) :)
Oh boy, after watching this video I doubt I'd like it much in Denmark. A lot of these social differences would be hard for me for two major reasons. 1 being awkward talkative as someone who is very ADHD and autistic. and 2 a lot of issues I suffered as a child due to bullying. This culture would be really rough cause most of the time I've been on the outside of social circles, and with a culture that has walls keeping out "outsiders" makes it that much more difficult. The very interesting thing is I have a very big chunk of my lineage from Denmark, yet my customs I grew up with are completely flipped from what they are there in Denmark. I would think that having such a relation would have rubbed off but is sure hasn't.
@@SuiGenerisAbbie, that's really interesting cause there is many on the political left in the US that could learn that Americans wanting people to speak English is not such a bigoted thing, yet they call any conservative that wants someone to speak English a "bigot" which is a bit absurd to me.
Hello Guys i really enjoy ur channel, as a Dane. I love to hear how other people see us. May i ask something. How did you guys do with Danish Humor ? Our Humor is pretty dark at times, if its not heavy sarcasm. I found out on my trips oversea. Seems like our Humor is very Nordic and only shared with Scandinavians and Brits.
I had a conversation with one of my US friends.. She mentioned wanting to vacation here, and I said that we’d love to host her, but to be prepared for different communication “rules”.. I used your example to show how Intent Matters.. It was a great help, so thank you 🙏🏼 During my year as an exchange student, I first encountered the opposite situation.. the US concept of “don’t ask like that, it’s rude”.. Funnily enough it was a girl who was confused about meeting me at church, when it wasn’t my religion.. She simply asked.: why are you here.? I never got to answer, because she was scolded by my others😂🤯 I found the question both engaging and honest.. I wouldn’t have minded answering - but they were all worried that I had been insulted, and my English wasn’t proficient enough at that point, to explain that being met with that level of honest curiosity was actually something I appreciated 😅
Danes love to hear about Denmark. It's a small country so we really like to hear why people Choose to visit Denmark. Thats always why Danes love seeing refereances to Danmark in Movies and series.
You are so welcome! We're really glad you enjoy these videos. Making them definitely helps us to understand Danish culture more (because we really have to analyze our experiences) but also helps us reflect on American culture too (and how we have changed since moving away) 🇩🇰😀
I lived and work in the south of Sweden near Malmö and have always loved Denmark and their direct and laidback lives. Now living in Gothenburg I feel that many people here are more like the people in Copenhagen.. Not as direct but the feeling of being laidback are still the same.
Curse words don’t have very much power in Denmark. They are not taboo and are used much more freely - both the Danish and English words. There are no rules on swear words on Danish TV, no bleeping! Most of the time TV presenters and people being interviewed on TV don’t swear but if it happens there is no consequence. They might say “excuse me”, but not always. Children’s TV have sometimes been criticised for containing a lot of swearing, but creators use it in their programs to reflect how kids in Denmark speak in real life. They know that it will quickly sound unrealistic if non of the kid-actors swear😉
Great point! We didn't consider how the use in TV and movies (especially to make things realistic) impacts culture as a whole. American censorship in movies has always played a role in how language is used in the States. Have you seen History of Swear Words (Netflix)? It was an interesting topic and felt very nice to have a few hours of non-stop cursing during these times haha.
Only some people in their 60’s and up might not like cursing. As they die out doing the next 40ish years there will be none one left in Denmark that gives a flying f*** if you curse! Except maybe immigrants.
@@Hillgrov piss of is kind of hard to use on an inoffensive way, but saying the same with no curse words can be just as offensive! I’m talking about using curse words to enhancing the message. There are no bad words it’s all in how you use them!
Q: How is your Danish coming along? A: It’s stuck in the back of my mouth at the moment, but I’m working hard on shoving it further down my throat to make it sound more like the real thing.
So funny, it's probably because everything we've learned about Danish culture has been compressed into a four-year period instead of spread over a lifetime. We also have the benefit of comparison - which is interesting because it's made us analyze American life too (and realize so many American quirks) 😀 🇩🇰
My grandmother was Danish. I wish she had taught me some Danish, but she only spoke English in America. She brought me to Denmark and Norway when I was in high school to meet family and see the countries. I'm laughing so hard because she had a lot of these Danish personality and cultural characteristics! I miss her so much, if I could learn the language sufficiently I probably really love it there! Sounds like my kind of people ❤ 🇩🇰
Thanks so much, we're glad you like them! A lot of them are just things that COULD be taken the wrong way from new arrivals that haven't "unlocked" some social queues yet. That's a little bit of what we try to put in our videos.
@@RobeTrotting if you want to could you make a video kinda showing the differences in people living in Jylland and Sjælland? 😊 people from Copenhagen and people from Jylland acts and speaks differently
@@yasminchan7425 That's a great idea - we plan to do some traveling to Jylland this summer and we've now heard about a lot of the differences so a video to explore and learn more about them could be really fun!
@@yasminchan7425 agree there an huge diffrent from people from copenhagen or Jylland . But also fyn and bornholm As you say not only with dialekt But also huge behavour and culture difftens.
#3 It's also a sign of respect for your mental resilience. If a Dane starts using flowery language or beating around the bush they're either trying to sell you something or they think you would be hurt by the directness, the way you might try to explain to a child that their dog died, you know?
Danish are great, a friend and I was down there (from Sweden) to visit a friend and I lost my phone on a night out. The next day my friend got a phonecall from my phone and it was the guy who had it who called to arrange to meet so I could get it back. How excellent is that!?! Heja Danmark!
That is so unsurprising, Danes are great people! You wouldn't always have the same experience in the States, that's for sure! We love Sweden too - definitely need to make some trips there for suture videos when things are back to normal.
Yeah, i was raised here so i never thought about how weird it must be to other people that we just leave our doors unlocked, or open. Like if you are unpacking your car you just leave the entire trunk open, and go into your house with some things at a time, and let the rest just sit out with no worries that someone might take anything.
I was an exchange student in Minnesota for a year. One time I hit my foot in class and cursed. Then I got detention, which would never happen in Denmark 😂
Hehe, I was a year in New Hampshire and by Danish standards the humid heat of the east coast is a killer - so at soccer practice one day I cursed at the heat in Danish. Everyone wanted to know what is said including the coach and I refused to translate and coach said it’s Ok, so I told them “F&*@ing heat” coach just looked at me and said, “ok no need to translate another time” (the Danish words were forpulede hede)
20 years ago, I was an exchange student in Idaho, at a Mormon family. Great family ♥️ But in Denmark we used the word "smartass" as a funny word, never bad intentions..... Ohhhh but it was the wrong word to use in Idaho 🤣
Oh wow, we've never been to Idaho but the nature is supposed to be incredible. Someone else mentioned that the more religious a society is, the less they might tolerate curse words (which could explain how a Mormon family may react strongly). Now I'm picturing an innocent exchange student saying "smartass" at the dinner table with a conservative American host family LOL too funny!
true. silence would be a bigger insult from a dane than "making fun" over a mistake. we would never joke with someone we didnt feel comfortable with. Take is as you are accepted into the team.
Derek here, and I couldn't agree more! I have always had a similar personality and attitude - don't worry about me "making fun", only worry if I don't because then I don't feel comfortable with you as a friend haha
Den her video var *fucking* sjov :D - See what I did there? My favourite type of Danish downplaying is if you are going to an event in Jutland and you ask someone how they like it, and they say "Det ku' ha' været møj' værre", literally "It could have been much worse"... Which in this case means that they are actually having a lot of fun and enjoying themselves. I was at my then bf's parents' silver wedding celebration, and his dad said exactly this about their 25 years together. :) Also loved the reactions in the little skits. They should be a meme!
That is so funny! Now that you say that, we have definitely heard friends say that before - it's such a great sentiment, and never a lie haha. I love that your bf's dad described his anniversary celebration that way though 😂😂😂 We'll definitely work on a meme haha Derek has insane facial expressions and finally, they came to good use.
@@RobeTrotting But dont beeb out the fucking cursewords :D it like the owner of the beeb pretends the word dont exist, even though everyone know what word the beeb is placing. :D
Careful Emil, or you will be censored by the TH-cam algorithm. Ones I used to manny “bad” words and I could not reply to videos for a week. It didn’t say and didn’t even inform me that I had got an timeout, my replies looked like they were there but when I looked back to se why it got no reaction they were not there. Though I had also criticized the CCP and Putin so that might also be the reason. Who knows, but it would not be the first time TH-cam takes the CCP’s side over free speech.
A quick note for the #7 - It could also be because we' trying to figure out whether we should be talking danish or english in the conversation. It can seem pretty rude/embarrising on our part speaking english if the other person actually does speak danish. 😊
Hey Daniel, that's a good point - thanks for adding it. It's actually really nice when Danes offer to take a conversation in Danish (especially for those of us who need the practice) 😀
For #1: ”Hvad laver du?” = ”What’s your job(situation)” or "What do you do for a living". It’s one of the most common conversation starters. So much that it’s a cliché.
Also a great example for something getting lost in translation, because “hvad laver du” translates into “what are you doing” which isn’t exactly “what do you do for a living”.
@@camp4600 Hvor to voksne mødes socialt/selskabeligt, betyder ”Hvad laver du?” vist altid, ”Hvad arbejder du med?”, hvor det fra en voksen til et barn selvfølgelig skal forstås bogstaveligt. For en dansk-som-fremmedsprog-person ved et middagsbord må dog sætningen ”Nå, hvad går du så og laver?” være helt uforståelig, da man i situationen jo hverken går eller laver noget :-D
@@sorensanderskov "hvad laver du?"/"Hvad arbejder du med?" when said outside of a workplace environment is a big sign that the person saying it is somewhat socially awkward. The same goes for asking an acquaintance or extended family member about school as a cold opener. The reason that it is frowned upon as a question is that it forces the conversation into a specific track that the one getting asked might not be particularly interested in. It also very easily turns into a cross examination where the person asking the questions just keeps trying to extract personal trivia from the other person.
@@nicolaim4275 Could be (though I’m not sure I understand your point 100 %). In Danish language/culture it is traditionally considered a neutral topic to ask about work-related matters. Maybe because we’re supposed to respect all walks of life more or less equally. So as I stated in this comment: “Hvad laver du?” is a conventional (cliché) conversation starter intended to be without potential conflict.
@@sorensanderskov Jeg er altså også dansker, så jeg ved, at det ikke helt passer. Hvis man har en profession som er stereotypt uinteressant vil man hade det spørgsmål, fordi folks øjne bliver matte ved svaret. Hvis man har et job som alle har en holdning til (for eksempel lærer) skal man høre på folks årtier gamle historier om dengang de gik i skole og forsvare, hvorfor lærer Bente i 1982 ikke tog sig af, at Torben blev mobbet af Sarahs klikke. Og hvis man er arbejdsløs vil man måske ligefrem lade være med at dukke op til sociale arrangementer for at undgå at føle sig stigmatiseret. Spørgsmålet bliver stillet ofte og det _er_ en kliche, men det er ofte de samme mennesker der går rundt og stiller det spørgsmål til alle de møder og ofte bliver spørgsmålet stillet fordi de folk ikke aner, hvordan man har en rigtig samtale, så de benytter små tricks der desværre ikke altid er så populære blandt de tilspurgte.
@@yahmin7786 This is only how they do in parts of Jutland, but it's not really indirectness it understating things. They live in Copenhagen on Zealand, there we don't really do that.
Also, the danish flag primarily celebration; birthdays, graduations, christmas, football. But rarely really that much of national pride (i think)... Like when the muhammad drawings came out and some people burned danish flags to show their rage - no one in my circle of friends or family really batted an eye. It was more, "oh, they're burning the flag....well we have plenty more"
@@MetteLentz true. It's just stupid to rage up and down so/me about it. Because what else could you do, right? In my circle of friends, we usually laugh about stuff like that. Because to us, it's them showing their hate for us, by literally burning their money. It takes money to get hold of these flags regardless of how you spin it. Buy a flag? Costs money. Buy a white sheet and red paint? Costs money. Get someone else to supply you with said flag? Costs them money. It's not going to take money out of my pocket, either way. But it would be money that could have been spent on a new pair of underwear or to save up for a pair of shoes, whatever... Something that many of those people would have a hard time getting due to povetry, unrest or brutal regimes.
@@RobeTrotting I know I already stated it below in another comment, but no, it's not like in US. Theirs is about national pride, danish is about football, holidays and birthdays (celebrations). Yes some groups, especially political will use it but I don't think Danes have the same kind of national pride that the US seems to have. Still proud of our country I'm guessing but in a different way. Never heard any Dane be like "I'm a proud Dane!!" if not as a parody
I like the fact that you guys made this video for people coming to Denmark, but for me born and raised here, i must say that i learned something as well. ill probably reflect a little more regarding the things i say to my not born and raised Danish friends. Thanks for the great video and laughs :D
That's such a great mindset, I'm sure they'll appreciate it - it's all about bridging the invisible culture gaps 😀Thank you for the kind comment, we're glad you enjoyed the video!
As a Brit engaged to a Dane, it too took some time for me to get use to my fiance's directness. Even when she would reply 'i don't know' to a question, I would be like 'are you frustrated/annoyed?'. Cos England that's how it be interpreted. Now I find it cute and admirable. I'm also totally going to use 'i have doubts' at my workplace xP
Isn't it so funny how the same words can seem so different to those of us from different places? haha We also find it endearing, but there were some confusing times when we first arrived in Denmark haha.
Making fun of you is a declaration of affection. I'd ever only laugh at somebody that I liked and I get all warm and fuzzy if it happens to me. Also self deprecating humor is very Danish, that way you invite others to have a go at you.
Well said! We both had that type of humor and personality before moving to Denmark, so I think that made the transition a lot easier for us. Our friend groups are have always been based around making fun of the others in the group, so that has helped us a lot over the years haha 😂
Danish humor can also be divided Some have sacastic humor And just ironi / dark humor not to be mean just fun. While some dont like that at all and can be afended if some one make joke on other behave. Reguardless of not ment negative. So importen to fell the person vibe before go joke in that way. All im say not all danes are like you just whrote far from
@@anetteholmkjr5934 If you can't laugh at yourself, then how can you have fun? Learning Danish to visit a friend. Hun bor i Holbæk. Jeg har ikke penge nok, lige nu. One day. Undskyld, mit dansk er dårligt af
@@johnnylong03 that danish was spot on, and without mistakes. I'd have added an unfortunately ("desværre") after "har in the second sentence, but that's just how I express myself. Yours was good as it is.
I think you guys are mostly spot on. I would add two things. The kvajebajer thing and owning up to mistakes in general is a very Danish thing. In work situations we like to say that those that make no mistakes are the ones who do no work. So in other words its okay to goof up and you should never be afraid of admitting mistakes. Other cultures fear bringing up mistakes which can lead to the mistakes not being fixed and bad stuff happening. The last one about "thats how we do things in Denmark" might also be a curtesey thing. If it is not just about food but about politics or big issues. It might be that the Dane actually thinks that what you are saying is really wrong and that if the conversation goes further the Dane will have to use our directness and tell you why "your political system is wrong" (for example). So the Dane might know that you are heading into a topic that you will never agree on and is shutting it down to avoid getting into a real argument with you. Not saying that is always the case, just saying it might be :-)
Yes, thinks it’s really important that people’s and organization can own up to their mistakes. As only that way they can do better next time and also others can avoid doing the same mistake. I think that works really well in Denmark, in most fields anyway. But one area where it do not work, and it seems to get worse and worse is with the politicians, they almost never acknowledge their mistakes they comer them up and also comer up for others. That why politicians are some of the people I have the least respect for and trust in. Not that the Danish politicians are worse then those from most other nations, just the opposite. That’s probably one of the biggest problems with the world.
We do do a lot of things that might seem rude, but it is just the directness and we usually don’t mean it in a rude way (as you said). One of my favorite weird things we do is when you have a “kagemand” (cake man) for your birthday. The cake man represents the birthday person, but the host (or sometimes the birthday person) has to cut the throat of the cake while everyone screams. It’s mostly found at kid’s birthdays or birthdays where only family is invited, but my friends from other countries definitely found that one a bit weird lol
I'm a dane and i know about the "kagemand" but never have i heard of the cutting the throat and screaming, or seen that being a thing. Sounds super weird
Thanks so much, we're glad you like them. That's a great phrase - definitely going to remember that one. We might call it "short and sweet" and we love that way of operating now - it's basically culture shock when we spend any time in the States visiting family haha. They don't know how to take us now.
I would also like to point out that often the “how’s your danish coming along” question, at least in my experience, can also be a way to offer help with the language itself or to figure out which language you’d rather speak at that moment. It opens up the possibility for you to ask questions about the language that a danish person can maybe explain, or for you to mention that your danish isn’t that great yet, and then we can switch the conversation to English. Most of the time it is also genuine curiosity. We’re often told that danish is a very hard language to learn, so we want to know your experience with it
As a Brit living in Denmark for nearly 30 years, I'd say learning the language is the main way to learn the culture. The Danes are often trying to be helpful and will often speak English to you if you let them, but to use a Danish expression, it's a "bjørnetjeneste", or in other words it's not doing you any favours! I do think it's partly about respecting the country you've chosen to live in, and partly about making your life easier!
I love your advice of “consider the intent”. I love you perceptiveness and respectful way of looking at our culture. As a psychologist working a lot with foreigners this is something that I think can help a lot of people who have a hard time adjusting. However I think that your perspectives and experience as two American guys can be quite different then, say a person from Asian or Africa. Some Danes can unfortunately be quite hostile to people they don’t identify with as positively as Americans.
Hej Rune, thank you so much for the compliments and for watching our video. We're super glad you liked it 😀🇩🇰 We agree with you 100% about the difference between our experience and other foreigners from beyond America. We didn't in this video (but do in another) acknowledge that we have A LOT of advantages and privilege in how we are perceived as well as the benefit of speaking English and moving to Denmark with a job and the assistance that a corporate relocation offers.
@@RobeTrotting Watching your videos it really comes across to me that you are super aware of your positionality. I really like that and with your respectful and caring way of analysing a different culture, I think it becomes quite useful to Danes and nondanes alike:) In relation to your example about someone telling you not to park On the sidewalk. Something that really rubbed me the wrong way when I lived in the US was people using the term “you need to”. It felt so strange that someone could tell me about my “needs” to engage in a specific behaviour😂
Concider the intent....I think ( as a born Dane) this is the worst side of our national caracter, that it is regarded as OK to make fun on others expence, and if the victim dont like it the bully has every right in the world to be more rude, so the first insult is the smallest. Never had, and never will, get to understand that part of my countrys behaviour. I can much more relate to the spanish way of talking to eachother. There you only calls someone something bad if you dont like them. Much easier for everyone in the long run.
As a Canadian living in DK, I had a lot of fun watching this! It made me remember when the Danish man who later became my husband and I had a club sandwich in a restaurant in Montreal. Yes, he did eat a club sandwich with a knife and fork 🤣. And what about this one at work: Me: Do you know Julie? She is also Canadian Danish colleague: : I guess so... isn’t this the one who was eating a sandwich with her hands at the lunch meeting? 🤣🤣
Hey Diane, so glad you liked the video 😀 It's so funny how far our Danish friends will go to avoid eating with hands - we've been using the knife and fork more than in the States but still can't get used to it for tacos or sandwiches 😂😂
@@RobeTrotting Haha! And don’t ever switch hand with your fork between cutting and eating!!! 🤣🤣 Glad that you guys also seem to enjoy living in this wonderful country 🇩🇰😁
I'm Danish, and I don't think we normally have any issue with someome eating a sandwich with their hands. That's literally what sandwiches were invented for 😂 But it doesn't mean you have to eat it that way, in my opinion 😆 I often eat a burger with utensils. I honestly think that's just easier if it's a large/tall burger, because then I don't get any irritating sauce on my hands 😂 Why make anything unnecessarily difficult or uncomfortable for yourself? Why not eat the way that makes you comfortable? Though I have to make an exception to this idea when it comes to sushi, as there should be jail time for eating it with utensils. I can assure you that I've never witnessed such a pervesion, but I would call the police if I did. If you know Danish open rye bread sandwiches, such as smørrebrød, you may know that we also regularly eat them with utensils, and they're also a kind of sandwiches.
#1 - Hvad laver du i Danmark? (What are you doing in Denmark) is also a way of asking for your occupation. So when asked, what are you doing in Denmark, it might just be a Dane who have translated the words directly in thair head and are saying that, instead of translating the meaning, what are your occupation in Denmark :)
Yes, for sure. This is one that (unfortunately) many foreigners don't fully understand when they hear it the first time. It's just a nice way of making conversation and "breaking the ice" with a new acquaintance 😀
If a Scandinavian makes fun of your mistake it means they consider you a close friend. For example if you'd slip on some ice in the winter I'd laugh my ass of if you were my friend but if I didn't know you I'd probably ignore you and continue walking or check if you're ok.
Hej Anton, that's the best kind of friendship and why we really get along well with our Danish friends and connect on that level. 🇩🇰 It's very much our personality to joke around with friends that way, even to a degree that would sound horrible to someone who didn't know any better 😂
@@RobeTrotting Same 😂 when I'm out with friends i wouldn't be surprised if they thought we were having an argument or bullying each other. But when it comes down to it we'll always be there for them.
@@kohwai8321 Yes! The mark of true friendship - laughing and making fun like siblings because you're "chosen family" :) And on that note, if you ever run into us in Copenhagen be sure to call us jerks and make fun of how badly we butcher the Danish language when we try to speak it hahaha
The thing to remember it's almost always making fun of the mistake... NOT the person that made it. Especially if it's something like a spelling error.... I recall (and I do hope I recall this as a true fact) when it was reported about the Queen's new 'textile gallery' in the news some... 10 or 15 or so years back.... but a newspaper or some such had printed the word 'Textile' wrong.... so it said Testicle instead. That was FUNNY - cuz absurdity is the core of humor and very much so for many of us danes.
Also very British. We'll laugh at a friend who has quite clearly severely injured themselves, then gain our composure and begin to panic and call an ambulance lol.
🇩🇰🇺🇸 As a Dane this was fascinating. We mean well, but can definetely come across as quite rude. Tthe directness is everywhere and gets misintrepeted often. In my workplace millions are spent on extensive programs teaching colleagues how to give each other constructive feedback. It’s very real, and kudos to you guys for picking up on it. 👍
Being able to give someone some really useful feedback is a great skill, but you also need to look at a situation to see if the person can cope with feedback at that time. Sometimes it is just not a good time to be told what you need to know!
The use of the flag 🇩🇰🇩🇰🇩🇰 for birthdays and on the Christmas tree, really came into prominence after the war of 1864, when Denmark was reduced to a small nation state. The outside threat meant that national identity became all important.
haha spot on guys, you really getting a hang on denmark, i wish all foreighners and nationalitys could be as fast as you to grasp our quirkines ;) so you get a flag and a thumbs up from jylland ... good video, keep them coming
Thank you so much - we hope that in some small way our videos might help some other 'outlanders' get the hang of things. We try to look at these topics as if we're explaining them to ourselves 4 years ago in our early days of living in Denmark 😀🇩🇰
You guys have an impressive insight and understanding of danish culture! It is always good fun to come in here and reflect on how others see us and our quirky culture. In Denmark it is important to understand our humor for us to not come across rude. It is often kind of dark and jokes are very often made on expense of you or the person making the joke. So being able to joke around about your own mistakes and understanding that when others do it, it is ment as love. I think is important to understand when living here. As always thanks for the videos!
We're so glad you like the videos and thank you for the kind words. We really enjoy making them and having a chance to really reflect on what we've learned over the last few years - and best of all we usually pick up a few more facts and background knowledge from the comments. We try to look at these topics as if we are talking to ourselves four years ago when we may have misunderstood the humor or other traits (to hopefully help some new outlanders) 😀🇩🇰
So much this. Dane here, and when I speak in any of the other languages I know, I deliberately try to never be funny. Danish humor often comes across as rude when translated.
as having Adhd as I have been diagnosed with in a late age, your video has been very helpful to me. Because even I am born and raised here in Denmark, there has been so much foolish things and words that I have been trying to fit out with in years... And now I know that they didn't said it to be rude, but only was iconic when they were saying what they said. Thanks so much for your video uploading 🥰🥰🥰.
I love your perspectives on Danish culture it’s really fun to learn about my culture from another perspective. Personally, I use English curse words because the Danish curse words are mostly religious so it doesn’t after my taste have the same strong impact when you say (most of) them 😅
Thank you so much! We're glad you enjoyed the video. And thank you for your comment, it's interesting for us to be learning more about the background of the Danish curse words too 🇩🇰 😀
Very insightful. It is also obvious, that you are in Copenhagen. Had you been living in, for instance, rural Jutland, you might have noticed more significant cultural differences. I would say that jutlanders tend to understate things about as much as Americans tend to overstate them. The combination would be hilarious.
Fully agree with you. I work with people who are based in Jutland and there is a huge difference between there and Copenhagen. Their interactions with Americans is fantastic to watch 😋
@@RobeTrotting I can confirm. Sealanders are sooooo chatty. It gets annoying quickly. They're also overly effusive and give praise too easily. It gets uncomfortable to an extreme degree very quickly. I find that people with overly bubbly personalities make me distrustful of their intent and - frankly - intelligence. I do try to be mindful of it, and judge the intent, however. But I'm very happy after five years living near Copenhagen to be back in the calm dark bleakness of Jutland. I live in North Jutland now, grew up in the west. Both are places where action is judged more than words. Also areas where you can be a raging alcoholic as long as you do your job.. but if you are on benefits there had better be a damn good reason.
I also wonder how old that neighbor was. Older people have that tendency of being a bit nosey with 'parking'. At least I've learnt so from my own grandparents! :p
The F-word is a gift to the Danish language! It's short, it's versatile. Verb, noun and adjective. AND we don't have the emotional "connotations" with the word, so we don't "feel" it, like we feel Danish swear words,.
@@RobeTrotting Futher more, Danish swear words tend to be horrible, compared to something as natural as fåk. I mean, most of us do it, and it's nice! In Danish it's more like: May cancer eat me - Satan in Hell - may the Devil's lightning strike me - Satan eat me. And milder ones spins around shit and turd. In that comparision, FÅK is kind of cute! Love your outtake on Denmark, by the way!
@@RobeTrotting there are nothing you can say where you could not fit the F-word in. It can be used when talking about child birth, weddings and funerals. When talking about love, food or sickness. Anyway I can’t come up with a topic where it would not be fitting to use it in some way. Maybe you can come up with one? :P
@@tommykoed7493 Det ved jeg den-onde-lyne-me-ikke! My parents are respektively from Vest Jylland and Vendsyssel, but I'm fanden-æde-me born and raised on Østfyn. Hygge :-)
You nailed it!!. As a Dane, im having trouble seeing what wrong until you explain how you see it. It is excatly how we speak, and exactly how out culture is. Downplay many tings.
So glad you liked the video, and we wouldn't characterize it as wrong - definitely not at all. We really want this video to just help other foreigners know how to bridge some of the cultural differences (all of which are innocent and some are very positive once you understand them) 😀🇩🇰
Oh wow, where were you working when that happened? Mike deals with it a lot because he worked for the Philadelphia headquarters of his company before moving to Copenhagen and he's always advising colleagues on "how the Americans take feedback" haha. Americans also aren't used to the flat style of leadership in Denmark where you can have honest and direct conversations with your boss and even his or her boss.
@@RobeTrotting not really a long story or big deal. Just told some bragging hot shots, that they were not all, they cracked themselfes up to be. In other words, I exposed their incompetence. Learned my lesson well. Today I,m considered to be good at what I do. However I don't get involved with anybody at work. It's a super nacissistic enviorement, and everyone is the king of their own hill. It's 100 % against my good upbringing in the 60's Copenhagen. So now I lie, cheat, works 50% of my capacity, and management is 100 % satisfied with my performance. Inside, I feel like a lazy crook. Only happy my mother ain't alive to see it.
8:43 When i attended afterschool (a danish, one year long boardingschool) there was a tradition of clapping everytime someone accidentally dropped and shattered a glass or a plate at breakfast or dinner. So this is very true
Ah, yes - we do that sometimes in American schools, and it's similar in nature, to just laugh at the situation and not the person who dropped the glass/plate. Of course, the American teachers try to stop it because they're afraid it's bullying.
I used to work as a residential advisor for American exchange students in Copenhagen, and I have definitely experienced how my Danish directness can be off putting to Americans. I think you nailed most of your observations although I am not so sure about the last one. I have found myself discussing cultural or other differences with Americans and saying "well, that's just how we do it in Denmark". It has never been my intention to shut down the conversation and I think most Danes are happy to discuss even rather controversial subjects as long as you are respectful and not trying to tell them how they should act - we have a bit of a little brother complex, I think. Such a small country who likes to think of itself as an important player on the world stage. When I have said "that's just how we do in Denmark" it's more of a "huh, I've never thought about why I do it this way - I guess it's just the way we do it here". I think your first point about intent is spot on. If someone is asking you questions in a direct manner, it most probably just means they're actually interested in getting to know you. And you're absolutely right - it can be puzzling to a Dane how you would choose to come to Denmark of all places. I think we tend to think of our own country as a little bit dull. But nice and cosy. Kind of like The Shire in LOTR. But why would you go there if you aren't a hobbit, you know? ;) About the swearing: I don't think it is only a case of foreign words sounding less bad to us although I think you are right about that. I do believe, because of our directness, we are much more tolerant of foul language in general. You never see swear words bleeped out in Danish music, movies or TV, and as a Dane i wonder why you do it. It is not like you don't know what's being said behind the bleep anyways :)
Oh, and whenever I have asked an American how their Danish was coming along I wasn't really expecting them to learn because why would you? We all speak English anyways. It was more of a curiosity because all we hear about from foreigners is how difficult our language is, so it is always good fun to hear about your struggles. Again, I think most Danes are pretty understanding of you if you won't put a lot of effort into learning Danish - especially if you're only going to live here for a limited amount of time.
Magnus....Magnus......That is based on the pretext that the greater Danish population to some degree either speak or understand the Swedish language. Which is not the case. Geographical proximity does not in any way imply a lingual compatibility. This is proved through the USA/Canada relationship. Our two nations are sharing a vast border, yet, anything a man from Canuckistan says is incomprehensible. We don't speak French, and we don't think left 🤣🤣
@@thefreedomguyuk I think the joke here is that the Danes and Swedes hate each other (historically, it's mostly just "banter" these for lack of a better word).
I'm sorry, but everytime you try to speak Danish, I really appreciate you saying it right after in English, because I have such a hard time understanding you
The parking one could actually be to help you avoid a parking ticket, because Copenhagen have the most parking attendees in all of Denmark, and they can be mean-spirited. I think you guys are spot on, and I'm watching your videos even though I'm from Denmark 😄😄
Very true, she definitely was only trying to help and was such a nice neighbor once we got to know her and her family. Thanks for watching, we'll keep them coming and soon we'll make some about our weird American that we learn about from living abroad 😀
i feel like us danes expect you to learn danish when you move to the country, since about 99% of danes also speaks English, and 30-50% also speaks either german or french. so its like: we can start out in your language (English) but you have to learn the language at some point in time
Helt enig! Gustav. Vi har også fået opbygget et demokrati, der kan giver os mere personlig frihed og ytringsfrihed end de fleste mener de har i USA. Det forpligter lidt hvorfor jeg gerne "sjæler" opmærksomheden for at støtte koreaneren YEONMI PARK der i sin flugt fra Nord til Syd Korea blev solgt i Kina til en kinesisk mand-hun var 13år. YEONMI PARK er nu i USA og er blevet Human Rights Activist, og fast besluttet på, at trods at være på Kim diktatorens dødsliste, at gøre det der skal til for at befri 25 millioner koreanere.
I don't think it is a particularly Danish thing to expect people to learn Danish if they move there. Anyone who moves to another country with different language/culture should learn the language and endeavour to at least understand the culture of the host country. It is about respect and civility. There is no point living in another country if you don't care to understand its culture and language.
@@williamjones4716 not talking about mastering the language at all! don't worry haha, but just learning som easy/normal stuff, but its all a grey area. but for example, I know an Italian guy who has lived here for 12 years, he speaks worse danish than I speak french, and I don't speak fucking french xD.
@@MTMF.london yeah, true, diddnt mean to formulate it in a way that meant it was a dnaish thing, but in this instance (the video is about dk after all) it makes sense to formulate it that way...
Actually, the woman who said, you shouldn't park on the sidewalk, is an ahole also by Danish standards... It's actually especially rude for a Dane, since we really don't like being confronted and told off. A proper Dane would have minded her own business. Also... The person eating taco with cutlery is an elitist douchebag, and they should speak for themselves. I'm sorry, you experienced that. Don't assimilate too much. All cultures need to be kept in check. Also the Danish. Keep being you, guys.
Hej Kim, we're glad you enjoyed the video! It's always funny to hear people say that things "get lost in translation" but when you really analyze examples - you notice how much it can happen every day 😀🇩🇰
And they barely even tried to hide it haha. Although it could be worse, Liechtenstein and Haiti had the same national flag for years and never realized it until the opening ceremonies of the 1936 Olympics?! 😂
I really appreciate your understanding of the reason behind danish behaviour- that you get that something, even though most danes are quite good at speaking and understanding english, just dont translate directly from danish to english and the other way about. Also the concept of intent - it is a good point to make. We are very direct, so as you said we would come out and be rude or offensive, if that was our intent. But mostly we dont mean to make people uncomfortable, or be rude or offensive. We are mostly very inclusive, wants everybody to be at ease. We just go about it in a different way. Joking or banter is not to laugh at your expence, but a way to show the other person you are part of the gang, we like you, enough to include you in our jokes. Its a way of saying: you are one of us.
I would add that the "That's how we do things in Denmark" is also about wanting to give foreigners the authentic experience. Lots of things require that you are doing it the correct way or understand it fully to enjoy it, and it usually doesn't come natural to foreigners. Fish fillet is not a good dish if you don't add remoulade and squeeze a lemon.
Good point - on both the remoulade and the intention of the statement. It's all unique to the situation on how to take it but usually it's to help someone learn the best way to do things and get the hang of the "unwritten rules".
thank you i wondered why people from abroad found my "what are you doing in denmark" question invasive but now I know not to ask that 30 seconds in the convo lol
Hej Lucia, it's just a funny little way that sounds different than it's intended for native English speakers but it's totally an appropriate question as a get-to-know-you questions 😀🇩🇰 "what brought you to Denmark" may be more in line with what you're asking though, or at least it will not be mistaken as invasive or questioning out of suspicion.
Thank you for this video. It is amusing and it warms my heart. You really managed to be spot-on explaining these small but probably special parts of our Danish culture. Oh, and you guys are so both funny and amiable. I am honoured that you want to live in my country and teach others about us, both our good and our bad sides.
I love that you are now doing little funny skits to help with your top tips and observations. I think youre really hitting the mark in a nice way to both our lovely Danes and also us as foreigners. Cant wait to see more!
Thanks so much! So glad you enjoyed it - the skits just kind of came to us. At first it was tough to explain certain concepts and we found ourselves sitting on the couch having these dialogues and Derek said "we need to just make them skits" and he changed into his "American costume" and it was too ridiculous not to share haha
First og all: I really enjoy you videos. When I was a kid, my mother talked of bad table manners as “eating in the American style”, Where you dont take time to appreciate the food, but cuts everything up, and then showels it in - so if anyone pushed me on that, I would most likely get defensive 😅
Hey Peter, thanks for commenting and your kind words, that story is so funny. I think your mother was right though - Americans do race to clear their plates haha. We also do the weird thing of using our fork as a knife to save time haha 😂🙈 Going out to a nice dinner in Denmark is so much nicer and more relaxing than in the States where they rush you out to fit more customers into the night. This did take us a little bit of time to convert to though (and we are thinking of making a video about dining out in DK vs. USA).
The thing about downplaying things is maybe also related to the “Danes being humble” thing, as we kinda tend to squirm when being appraised or get compliments either personally or towards the country, its cities, looks, or even its weather 😂 like “oh thanks but you should check X out then, mine is nothing to brag about” - again, the Danish culture is actually very affected by the “Jantelov” (though not as much as it has been in previous years) which basically tells you to “not brag about yourself or your deeds. You’re not better than everyone else”. And so it can feel kinda exposing to be complimented in public because why are you the one getting complimented and not everyone else around you? Are you better than them? Will they think so? But yeah it’s not as affecting as it once was, and of course I’m just writing my own theories here, and e.g. extroverts might completely disagree 😂
You're probably spot on that it's a bit of the Jantelov shining through - even if it's just in reference to the country. It's funny because we mentioned Jantelov in another video and we got so many comments saying "f**k Jantelov" haha, so we decided to keep it out of this video on purpose to avoid the strong emotional responses haha 😂😂😂 It may have some unwanted side effects for some people, but we think American culture could use a little bit of Jantelov.
@@RobeTrotting Long reply incoming: Oh wow! I gotta see that video then, it just got kinda late yesterday :P The thing is (at least nowadays, and at least I think so) that since Janteloven is so commonly known, this is actually when it IS so important to say "f*** Janteloven", because YES! You are/your achievement is that important that it's okay that you're getting celebrated and complimented, and that you have every right to be proud of it. But I feel that when people know about Janteloven and you know the one giving you the compliment also does, then the compliment can be received more as "wow, you really think so?" without any "guilt/shame/embarassment", because they know it's not really the norm but they chose to do so anyway because of you. And YEA, Janteloven is really a horrible tool to lower one's self esteem and teach that you should never be proud of yourself, so I get why people hate it too. So maybe it's important to take it with a grain of salt, as we say :) Either that or not follow it at all I'd say. And yeah, agree hahaha, Janteloven could teach people with American and British culture to be proud and praise things without overdoing it all the time or placing things on pedestals :P I do like the cultures' positivy about small things though. Like little sunshine people spreading happiness and optimism
I just found your sets of videos and I love 🫶🏻 them. I’m in opposite situation of you guys: A dane 🇩🇰living in the US🇺🇸. I’m impressed with your interpretation and articulation of our cultural differences. Godt gået, drenge. Jeg glæder mig til at se resten.
Wow, thank you so much for the kind words. We really enjoy sharing our experiences and trying to understand and dig into those little cultural differences - the ones that you also probably experience every day in the States :)
Hilarious how much you hit home with these points. Cool to see foreigners hellbend on understanding the quirks of our little country. Hope you'll thrive here. Velkommen. :) Btw, it was a random suggestion on YT, better check out your other vids.
I laughed out loud at the skit with eating a taco with knife and fork. When I had lived for about a week with my American room mate in Boston, he asked me if Danes always ate like they were eating with the queen? I had never thought about it or realised how weird it would look to foreigners. I was very impressed at the ability of Americans to eat pretty much everything with just a fork. Even chicken, just using the side of the fork to basically crush off a piece.
It's so funny you mention using the side of the fork as a knife - we really had no idea how weird that is until we lived abroad and really examined our habits closely 😂 PS: we love Boston and hope you did too. It was our first travel destination together, so always special.
As an American, who needs a fork?! We eat everything with our hands! Hot dogs, hamburgers, pizza, chicken wings, fried chicken, sandwiches, french fries, fish and chips. Except Chinese food - when we use a fork. ;-)
Is it seen as rude or unhygienic to eat with your hands? I had an uncomfortable meal in an Indian restaurant when I was eating with my hands and no one else was.
@@areteeeye Scooping food with your hands in any western country will be seen as extremely unhygienic even if it is Indian food. I know it's widespread in India and parts of Asia, but not in the west. There are distinct rules on how to hold utensils as well.
One thing I’ve noticed, as a Dane, in regards to our directness and sometimes relatively crude use of words, is that, since I talk with a lot of people, most of them American, on Discord for instance, I’ve kinda unknowingly tried to pick up that beating-around-the-bush thing, but mainly so when what I’m saying, I know is kinda... explicit, and I can’t think of any other way to say it. Boy do I go around in circles in that roundabout when that happens, because I am basically incapable of doing that. I guess it also doesn’t help that I have Aspergers (Autism) and ADHD (and other things as well). 😅
Spot on, again 😊 Quite impressed on how well you "get it"(/us), even when some things seem strange at first 😄 I can't even imagine how difficult it must be to "decipher" what is actually going on when meeting a new culture - especially when we appear to speak the same language in words and sentences, but use it very differently 😅
Ah, great call. It’s something that is purely friendly but the expression can seem off the first time you hear it (until you realize the meaning is actually “what brings you to Denmark”) 😊🇩🇰
This is actually really nice. I'm for sure gonna be aware of some of these things, especially cause I love talking with foreigners. You two are awesome. The "how is your danish coming along" part. you nailed that one as well. Many of us are just curious. But a prime example of when it's the expectation of foreigners to learn the language is the (now dead, may he rest in peace) Queens husband, Prins Henrik. If you want I'll try to clarify why he was prince and not king. But he was of French origin, and pretty much everyone close to the royals speaks French, German, English and what not. So he didn't think it was and issue untill the media brought up how annoyed the danish people was with him not learning danish. A big part of the danish people pretty much disliked him and ridiculed him for it till the day he died.
Haha. Yeah, I guess us Danes have a bad habit of downplaying compliments. I’m a danish teacher and one of my supervisors is from America. Some times when he passes by in the hall, he throws out a “good job” or “good seeing you today”, and we (the teachers) chuckle a bit and say to each other that he’s being very American today (meaning it’s a bit over the top) all in good fun, though. (And you’re right, we only chuckle because we like him) I’ve also had my share of supervisors who NEVER said something positive about our work, and I know what I prefer... You guys are great! It’s fun seeing Denmark from a fresh perspective. :)
Explaining this so well my dudes! "Not too high and not too low - like the Danish geography" had my laughing mate spot on :D It is clear you've had a lot run ins with Danes and the language and you really had the courage to be curious and actually understand what is beneath the more blunt exterior - really good examples the kvajebajer og kvajekage was really funny to hear you getting those right and shows you are really being laughed with - we do not want to drink with someone we actually think is a kvaj/ a jerk !! :D -And YES I really DO love our flag and is SUPER proud of it - It to me resembles ONLY good things and great times!! This Video deserves a Dannebrog
FOREIGNER: The weather’s been really nice lately. DANISH PERSON: Yeah, but it’s going to rain the rest of the week. FOREIGNER: I’m really excited for the Christmas market. DANISH PERSON: Yeah, but they’re so much better in Germany. FOREIGNER: Well … I like your shirt. DANISH PERSON: Oh, this? I’ve had it for years. FOREIGNER (thinking): Holy cow, what a gloomy person! DANISH PERSON (thinking): Hold nu op med at sige alle de rare ting, mærkelige fremling. Vi bruger ikke den slags her, og jeg ved simpelt hen ikke hvordan jeg skal reagere.
@@Haardberg Because of the word "fremling"? No, it's just one of those Norwegian/Swedish words that the always-so-wonderfully-tolerant Danes find funny because they sound like someone trying to speak Danish and getting it wrong. I suppose it would be even funnier if the Danes themselves could speak their own language, but they seem to have forgotten it. Which reminds me of a Danish poem describing this very situation: De fremmede der prøver at lære hendes sprog De synes det lyder li'somom det var havregrød i kog Og hver gang de prøver at magte hendes mål Der ler hun så hjerteløst og siger bare skål Der ler hun så hjerteløst og siger bare skål
@@humphreygokart2135 mere at du skrev "hold nu op med at sige alle de rare ting". Rare, som betyder mærkeligt på norsk, men betyder noget andet på dansk. Og jeg kan kun få din sætning til at give mening ved at bruge den norske betydning.
@@Haardberg Interessant. Jeg slog ordet "rar" op i ODS. Det viser sig at være relateret til det engelske engelske "rare", som jo både kan have en positiv og en negativ betydning alt efter sammenhængen. Sådan var det åbenbart også før i tiden på dansk/norsk, men så blev landene (kort fortalt) delt og gik hver sin vej, bl.a. hvad angår betydningen af ordet "rar". Min hensigt var at give indtryk af en person (dansker), der bruger det som noget positivt, men noget positivt som han ikke er vant til og ikke helt forstår, og som han derfor også opfatter som "sært", hvilket jo sjovt nok lige netop er den norske betydning.
funnily enough, an American song pretty much sums up the directness in Denmark about mistakes: "If you gotta be dumb, you gotta be tough" Often, and maybe more prevalent in Jylland, a harsh comment is often made about mistakes, but is tough love, no harm meant :)
As a Brazilian (direct culture) who has lived in the US for a while (indirect) , this is actually helping me understand American culture better. I wouldn’t have thought anything of any of these situations. But my American friends probably thought I was a total weirdo...or worse: rude!!! LOL!
They probably know how to receive direct comments, but as a generalization, Americans also like to "sugarcoat" things, so they may have had trouble telling you what they thought at the time anyway haha 😂 We are interesting people! It's fun to look at our American cultural traits too since we live in a new culture now and they stand out to us more.
Ah...Brazilian is VERY indirect as compared to Danmark. I am also Portuguese, I know Brazilians and I have Dutch friends working in Brazil. It is their directness that sometimes causes Brazilians to actualy cry. Liek when you just say as a manager that someone did not do a very good job and needs to do better etc...
Hi guys. I love your videos, you are doing a great job explaining us Danes with Humor and a twinkle in the eye. My girlfriend is from Germany, she moved to Denmark last summer, and we too experience many of the same cultural differences between us. I spend a lot of time apologising 😅 Looking forward to your next video.
Thanks Charlotte, we really love living in Denmark and hope we can help people who are going through some of these things for the first time. Especially these tiny cultural differences can be tough, so we try to look at these types of videos as "what would have saved us a little bit of confusion or even hurt feelings to see a video about in our early days?" and we go from there. We hope your girlfriend is adapting too, it sounds like you're really supportive so she's lucky 😀🇩🇰
@@RobeTrotting I can only try to imagine how it is to move to another country. Therefore I think what you are doing will help a lot of people to adjust more easily with humour. Denmark can be a hard experience and I know a few that have thrown in the towel after a couple of years. It can also quickly turn in to this “Danes are also so and so, Denmark is also this and that” but in a very negative “Denmark bad = my own country much better” kind of way. Here I just have to praise you guys for an amazing attitude and how you choose to handle the differences. I try to support my girlfriend as much as possible and try to make things a little bit easier for her. We are watching the videos and I translate it into German, it makes her feel a little bit more at ease to hear that other experience the same as she😊
My Canadian boss brings up a subject of discussion , I chime in. We discuss solutions. Me, a Dane: "Oh, do you want *me* to do it?" Canadian boss: "Could you?" Me: "Yes" Canadian boss leaves Me left thinking: "Does he want me to do it? I am able to do it, but does he want me to?"
Really good judgement and explanation, especially the intent part . You could have brought up the Danish concept "Jantelov" that basically states "You are not better than anybody else, so stop acting like it" it's a major part of the culture, you might have a new video there :-)
I have no doubt, that I have said "I doubt that" to an american... I did not think that was rude. One thing I have learned when speaking with other non scandinavians is, to start with a little wasted small talk, instead of getting to the point at hand. :) Keep up the good work.
Totally understand - on its face it definitely doesn't sound rude at all! And that is a good way to start a conversation - we Americans just can't jump into business without a few minutes of nonsense!
Ha ha. It’s pretty funny about the flag. It’s sometimes easy to forget that the Danish flag isn’t a universal symbol of celebration. We put that thing everywhere. 😂 🇩🇰
It's super fun though and it's a nice tradition that everyone can participate in (even if they need a quick briefing lesson). Derek flew home for his nephew's birthday two years ago and brought a Danish flag - he was turning 5, so just happy to have a little fun waving it, but now he loves talking about "the birthday flag from Denmark".
The funny thing is that any foreigner's failure to pronounce Danish usually is perfectly easy to understand for other Scandinavians, whereas the proper Danish pronunciation leaves us scratching our heads. When you said 'Jeg kan tale lidt dansk' you sounded more Norwegian or Swedish than Danish - you even had a bit of a sing song prosody going. :D
Also, "I have my doubts, maybe we should have a meeting" can also mean that maybe we should talk about it over beers. That happens with craftsmen when they have plenty of time.
I’m Swedish so our culture is similar in many ways (the flag thing being different lol) and I really enjoy hearing your reflections on a culture similar to my own! The directness is something I missed when I lived in England because when people don’t actually say what they mean, I feel like they’re not being honest with me/that they’re being fake and I started to doubt if I could take anything the person said at face value. However, the intent is something I always went back to. Even if my initial thought was that they’re being deceitful, I learned to look for the underlying meaning. Whereas if a Swedish person is not being direct with me it really pisses me off 😅 I think a lot of it is just realizing and getting used to the things people do in order to be respectful according to their culture. I subscribed and going to binge watch your videos, or listen rather while I’m cleaning this Sunday!
Thank you for subscribing and for watching Sandra. Even though they're different countries and you went the other way, you can probably relate to a lot of the examples here (and other videos) since you spent time in the UK from Sweden. You're spot on about the "seeming fake" aspect of not being as direct. Americans and Brits can often fall into that habit of "beating around the bush" instead of just saying what they mean. We find a bit of reverse culture shock now when we return to America to visit friends and family. Some even tell us that we are too harsh now haha.
If you cant count on something that sounds rude is ment to be rude.....then you cant count on something that sounds to be nice is nice. And thats the worst problem with Danish mentallity. You never know what to believe. ( Born Native Dane here).
Great video. You are very polite about our / the Danes' directness 😉 Did not really perceive that our language was so pool for words but now when you mention it it makes sense 👍🏻 I would like to add one thing to your list: personal space. In Scandinavia it is at least 3 feet which people from other cultures often misunderstand when we backs away.
Hej Kim. That's so true about the personal space, we should have included that in this or another video! It's very different from culture to culture and Scandinavian norms for space are good to be aware of 😀🇩🇰
🇩🇰 This was so spot on! I had such a laugh! I have lived in several other countries through my life, as well as going to Danish boardingschool with foreigners. I am so guilty of many of the things you mention! But you guys are so sweet and cute the way you go out of your way to be respectful! Loving it!
Thank you so much for watching Lisa and thank you again for the sweet comment. It is really funny how many little phrases and comments can come off differently, even in the same language haha. Our whole vision is always to pretend we are speaking to ourselves in the early days to help understand those funny differences 😃🇩🇰
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Danes can be quite direct. They will not spare candour in favour of "just being honest". Polish people are the same way. Poles will also tell you off, then ... just as quickly, they will simmer down. TRUST that this American has learnt such the HAAAAARD way, haha.
Danes want you to learn Danish, period! They might never come out and say such, but ... they want to see ALL foreigners at least make the effort to say stuff in the native language of the country wherein they choose to live.
I mean, it is just courteous to do that.
Hey, I like it when Mexicans learn to speak English if they choose to live and work in America, even though English is difficult to learn. So, I expect that American foreigners will also learn to speak the native language (or languages!) of the country wherein they have chosen to live, and work, too. And, if they do so, they will be appreciated all the more! :) :)
Oh boy, after watching this video I doubt I'd like it much in Denmark. A lot of these social differences would be hard for me for two major reasons. 1 being awkward talkative as someone who is very ADHD and autistic. and 2 a lot of issues I suffered as a child due to bullying. This culture would be really rough cause most of the time I've been on the outside of social circles, and with a culture that has walls keeping out "outsiders" makes it that much more difficult.
The very interesting thing is I have a very big chunk of my lineage from Denmark, yet my customs I grew up with are completely flipped from what they are there in Denmark. I would think that having such a relation would have rubbed off but is sure hasn't.
@@SuiGenerisAbbie, that's really interesting cause there is many on the political left in the US that could learn that Americans wanting people to speak English is not such a bigoted thing, yet they call any conservative that wants someone to speak English a "bigot" which is a bit absurd to me.
Hello Guys i really enjoy ur channel, as a Dane. I love to hear how other people see us.
May i ask something. How did you guys do with Danish Humor ? Our Humor is pretty dark at times, if its not heavy sarcasm.
I found out on my trips oversea. Seems like our Humor is very Nordic and only shared with Scandinavians and Brits.
I had a conversation with one of my US friends.. She mentioned wanting to vacation here, and I said that we’d love to host her, but to be prepared for different communication “rules”.. I used your example to show how Intent Matters..
It was a great help, so thank you 🙏🏼
During my year as an exchange student, I first encountered the opposite situation.. the US concept of “don’t ask like that, it’s rude”.. Funnily enough it was a girl who was confused about meeting me at church, when it wasn’t my religion.. She simply asked.: why are you here.?
I never got to answer, because she was scolded by my others😂🤯
I found the question both engaging and honest.. I wouldn’t have minded answering - but they were all worried that I had been insulted, and my English wasn’t proficient enough at that point, to explain that being met with that level of honest curiosity was actually something I appreciated 😅
Danes love to hear about Denmark. It's a small country so we really like to hear why people Choose to visit Denmark. Thats always why Danes love seeing refereances to Danmark in Movies and series.
Well they certainly don't come here for the weather. Nor the fantastic mountain vistas.
sadly, most of them just go to copenhagen :)
@@vrenak what how? who dosent love the rain?
@Maja Petersen - this is so true! I also look for Danish names in the credits 😊😊
Or videos like this one! :P
As a Dane I must say I always appreciate seeing how we are viewed by others. Really helps reflect on yourself. Thanks for the great video!
You are so welcome! We're really glad you enjoy these videos. Making them definitely helps us to understand Danish culture more (because we really have to analyze our experiences) but also helps us reflect on American culture too (and how we have changed since moving away) 🇩🇰😀
Totally agree
It seems The Danes and The Dutch are very similar!!
Totally agree. Dane working with alot of other countries.
And iam direct and short in my answers. And I should think a bit more about 😁🇩🇰
I lived and work in the south of Sweden near Malmö and have always loved Denmark and their direct and laidback lives.
Now living in Gothenburg I feel that many people here are more like the people in Copenhagen.. Not as direct but the feeling of being laidback are still the same.
In parts of northen jutland, the biggest compliment you can get is: you have done worse.
Yeah, we like understatements.
That's funny because now we realize we have heard a lot of friends use that statement to describe things :-)
Exactly. "Not bad" is a good thing, "very fine"... Not so much
Thats so true
Same in my family hehe or just "jah jaaah" and a nod hehe
Curse words don’t have very much power in Denmark. They are not taboo and are used much more freely - both the Danish and English words. There are no rules on swear words on Danish TV, no bleeping! Most of the time TV presenters and people being interviewed on TV don’t swear but if it happens there is no consequence. They might say “excuse me”, but not always.
Children’s TV have sometimes been criticised for containing a lot of swearing, but creators use it in their programs to reflect how kids in Denmark speak in real life. They know that it will quickly sound unrealistic if non of the kid-actors swear😉
Great point! We didn't consider how the use in TV and movies (especially to make things realistic) impacts culture as a whole. American censorship in movies has always played a role in how language is used in the States.
Have you seen History of Swear Words (Netflix)? It was an interesting topic and felt very nice to have a few hours of non-stop cursing during these times haha.
Only some people in their 60’s and up might not like cursing.
As they die out doing the next 40ish years there will be none one left in Denmark that gives a flying f*** if you curse!
Except maybe immigrants.
@@Hillgrov intelligent people use more curse words!
So it should be a positive coloring! :P
@@Hillgrov people who are nasty to others are who I dislike. That’s other people from the high income households you seems to say you like.
@@Hillgrov piss of is kind of hard to use on an inoffensive way, but saying the same with no curse words can be just as offensive!
I’m talking about using curse words to enhancing the message.
There are no bad words it’s all in how you use them!
Q: How is your Danish coming along?
A: It’s stuck in the back of my mouth at the moment, but I’m working hard on shoving it further down my throat to make it sound more like the real thing.
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Written by a Swede^^ .... Does that joke never get old to you guys?? x)
@@LorteSandalerMedIs I'm not Swedish and though I made the issue into a joke, it's actually serious enough.
🇬🇧🇩🇰 Hilarious & exactly right😅 (from a ½ Brit/½ Dane)
Starting to think you guys might understand Danish culture more than I do myself..
Ikr
Same..
So funny, it's probably because everything we've learned about Danish culture has been compressed into a four-year period instead of spread over a lifetime. We also have the benefit of comparison - which is interesting because it's made us analyze American life too (and realize so many American quirks) 😀 🇩🇰
@@RobeTrotting Would love a video focused on Anerucab quirks
@@Styggejoe For sure, it's in the queue :)
My grandmother was Danish. I wish she had taught me some Danish, but she only spoke English in America. She brought me to Denmark and Norway when I was in high school to meet family and see the countries. I'm laughing so hard because she had a lot of these Danish personality and cultural characteristics! I miss her so much, if I could learn the language sufficiently I probably really love it there! Sounds like my kind of people ❤ 🇩🇰
We are your kind 🤗
Most of these examples I never thought that they would sound rude to foreigners 😅
Great video! 🇩🇰
Thanks so much, we're glad you like them! A lot of them are just things that COULD be taken the wrong way from new arrivals that haven't "unlocked" some social queues yet. That's a little bit of what we try to put in our videos.
@@RobeTrotting if you want to could you make a video kinda showing the differences in people living in Jylland and Sjælland? 😊 people from Copenhagen and people from Jylland acts and speaks differently
@@yasminchan7425 That's a great idea - we plan to do some traveling to Jylland this summer and we've now heard about a lot of the differences so a video to explore and learn more about them could be really fun!
@@yasminchan7425 agree there an huge diffrent from people from copenhagen or Jylland . But also fyn and bornholm
As you say not only with dialekt
But also huge behavour and culture difftens.
They are..
#3 It's also a sign of respect for your mental resilience. If a Dane starts using flowery language or beating around the bush they're either trying to sell you something or they think you would be hurt by the directness, the way you might try to explain to a child that their dog died, you know?
thats a good way to put it.
Yes over the tip praise will be taken as either ironic or insincere.
Danish are great, a friend and I was down there (from Sweden) to visit a friend and I lost my phone on a night out. The next day my friend got a phonecall from my phone and it was the guy who had it who called to arrange to meet so I could get it back. How excellent is that!?! Heja Danmark!
That is so unsurprising, Danes are great people! You wouldn't always have the same experience in the States, that's for sure! We love Sweden too - definitely need to make some trips there for suture videos when things are back to normal.
Yeah, i was raised here so i never thought about how weird it must be to other people that we just leave our doors unlocked, or open. Like if you are unpacking your car you just leave the entire trunk open, and go into your house with some things at a time, and let the rest just sit out with no worries that someone might take anything.
I was an exchange student in Minnesota for a year.
One time I hit my foot in class and cursed. Then I got detention, which would never happen in Denmark 😂
That's so funny! It had to be quite a different experience spending a school year in the States 😀
Det er fandeme sjovt :'D
I have never understood why Americans are afraid of words.
😂
Hehe, I was a year in New Hampshire and by Danish standards the humid heat of the east coast is a killer - so at soccer practice one day I cursed at the heat in Danish. Everyone wanted to know what is said including the coach and I refused to translate and coach said it’s Ok, so I told them “F&*@ing heat” coach just looked at me and said, “ok no need to translate another time” (the Danish words were forpulede hede)
20 years ago, I was an exchange student in Idaho, at a Mormon family. Great family ♥️
But in Denmark we used the word "smartass" as a funny word, never bad intentions.....
Ohhhh but it was the wrong word to use in Idaho 🤣
You are right.. I have called a guy in North Carolina a "fuckwit" and he didn't take it well, but in the end he proved me right.
Oh wow, we've never been to Idaho but the nature is supposed to be incredible.
Someone else mentioned that the more religious a society is, the less they might tolerate curse words (which could explain how a Mormon family may react strongly).
Now I'm picturing an innocent exchange student saying "smartass" at the dinner table with a conservative American host family LOL too funny!
I once called my 9 year old hostbrother jackass, he didn’t speak to me for a week🙈 I lived in Ohio
🤣😂🤣😂 this killed me 😄😄 - the responds too 🤣
I’m a Mormon too
true. silence would be a bigger insult from a dane than "making fun" over a mistake. we would never joke with someone we didnt feel comfortable with. Take is as you are accepted into the team.
Derek here, and I couldn't agree more! I have always had a similar personality and attitude - don't worry about me "making fun", only worry if I don't because then I don't feel comfortable with you as a friend haha
That totally nailed it!
Den her video var *fucking* sjov :D - See what I did there?
My favourite type of Danish downplaying is if you are going to an event in Jutland and you ask someone how they like it, and they say "Det ku' ha' været møj' værre", literally "It could have been much worse"... Which in this case means that they are actually having a lot of fun and enjoying themselves. I was at my then bf's parents' silver wedding celebration, and his dad said exactly this about their 25 years together. :)
Also loved the reactions in the little skits. They should be a meme!
That is so funny! Now that you say that, we have definitely heard friends say that before - it's such a great sentiment, and never a lie haha. I love that your bf's dad described his anniversary celebration that way though 😂😂😂
We'll definitely work on a meme haha Derek has insane facial expressions and finally, they came to good use.
@@RobeTrotting But dont beeb out the fucking cursewords :D it like the owner of the beeb pretends the word dont exist, even though everyone know what word the beeb is placing. :D
@@sehested72 I think it's to avoid demonetization.
Careful Emil, or you will be censored by the TH-cam algorithm.
Ones I used to manny “bad” words and I could not reply to videos for a week. It didn’t say and didn’t even inform me that I had got an timeout, my replies looked like they were there but when I looked back to se why it got no reaction they were not there.
Though I had also criticized the CCP and Putin so that might also be the reason. Who knows, but it would not be the first time TH-cam takes the CCP’s side over free speech.
@@mwtrolle the russian market is also quite large. So money trumps (see what I did there? ;) ) free speech.
A quick note for the #7 - It could also be because we' trying to figure out whether we should be talking danish or english in the conversation. It can seem pretty rude/embarrising on our part speaking english if the other person actually does speak danish. 😊
Hey Daniel, that's a good point - thanks for adding it. It's actually really nice when Danes offer to take a conversation in Danish (especially for those of us who need the practice) 😀
Exactly - I thought the same. I always ask this question, not to be rude, but to get clear about which language serves best in the current situation.
Another aspect of kvajebajer, is making it up to the team, who maybe had to do extra work to compensate for your mistake.
@Maria Blente Well, who doesn't like cake? =)
I remember i school, you had to bring "flødeboller" for the whole class if your phone went off 😅
Ja det er noget fremmede ikke kender
@Maria Blente that's mainly because beer in a work environment is illegal these days. ;) Hence Kvajekage.
For #1: ”Hvad laver du?” = ”What’s your job(situation)” or "What do you do for a living". It’s one of the most common conversation starters. So much that it’s a cliché.
Also a great example for something getting lost in translation, because “hvad laver du” translates into “what are you doing” which isn’t exactly “what do you do for a living”.
@@camp4600 Hvor to voksne mødes socialt/selskabeligt, betyder ”Hvad laver du?” vist altid, ”Hvad arbejder du med?”, hvor det fra en voksen til et barn selvfølgelig skal forstås bogstaveligt. For en dansk-som-fremmedsprog-person ved et middagsbord må dog sætningen ”Nå, hvad går du så og laver?” være helt uforståelig, da man i situationen jo hverken går eller laver noget :-D
@@sorensanderskov "hvad laver du?"/"Hvad arbejder du med?" when said outside of a workplace environment is a big sign that the person saying it is somewhat socially awkward. The same goes for asking an acquaintance or extended family member about school as a cold opener. The reason that it is frowned upon as a question is that it forces the conversation into a specific track that the one getting asked might not be particularly interested in. It also very easily turns into a cross examination where the person asking the questions just keeps trying to extract personal trivia from the other person.
@@nicolaim4275 Could be (though I’m not sure I understand your point 100 %).
In Danish language/culture it is traditionally considered a neutral topic to ask about work-related matters.
Maybe because we’re supposed to respect all walks of life more or less equally. So as I stated in this comment: “Hvad laver du?” is a conventional (cliché) conversation starter intended to be without potential conflict.
@@sorensanderskov Jeg er altså også dansker, så jeg ved, at det ikke helt passer. Hvis man har en profession som er stereotypt uinteressant vil man hade det spørgsmål, fordi folks øjne bliver matte ved svaret. Hvis man har et job som alle har en holdning til (for eksempel lærer) skal man høre på folks årtier gamle historier om dengang de gik i skole og forsvare, hvorfor lærer Bente i 1982 ikke tog sig af, at Torben blev mobbet af Sarahs klikke. Og hvis man er arbejdsløs vil man måske ligefrem lade være med at dukke op til sociale arrangementer for at undgå at føle sig stigmatiseret.
Spørgsmålet bliver stillet ofte og det _er_ en kliche, men det er ofte de samme mennesker der går rundt og stiller det spørgsmål til alle de møder og ofte bliver spørgsmålet stillet fordi de folk ikke aner, hvordan man har en rigtig samtale, så de benytter små tricks der desværre ikke altid er så populære blandt de tilspurgte.
When someone from Jutland says "that something isn't too bad" he actually means "that it is extremely good"
This wasn’t the worst video ever!
Really well made, interesting and funny video.
It’s much faster that way.
Similar to British indirectness. But why most people say Danish speak directly like this video told
@@yahmin7786 This is only how they do in parts of Jutland, but it's not really indirectness it understating things. They live in Copenhagen on Zealand, there we don't really do that.
The thing with the flags, when you see it all the way up, it’s a celebration, if it’s only half way up, it’s for a funeral.
Ah, okay. That's very similar to the US 🇩🇰😀
Also, the danish flag primarily celebration; birthdays, graduations, christmas, football. But rarely really that much of national pride (i think)... Like when the muhammad drawings came out and some people burned danish flags to show their rage - no one in my circle of friends or family really batted an eye. It was more, "oh, they're burning the flag....well we have plenty more"
@@MetteLentz true. It's just stupid to rage up and down so/me about it. Because what else could you do, right?
In my circle of friends, we usually laugh about stuff like that. Because to us, it's them showing their hate for us, by literally burning their money. It takes money to get hold of these flags regardless of how you spin it. Buy a flag? Costs money. Buy a white sheet and red paint? Costs money. Get someone else to supply you with said flag? Costs them money. It's not going to take money out of my pocket, either way. But it would be money that could have been spent on a new pair of underwear or to save up for a pair of shoes, whatever... Something that many of those people would have a hard time getting due to povetry, unrest or brutal regimes.
@@RobeTrotting I know I already stated it below in another comment, but no, it's not like in US. Theirs is about national pride, danish is about football, holidays and birthdays (celebrations). Yes some groups, especially political will use it but I don't think Danes have the same kind of national pride that the US seems to have. Still proud of our country I'm guessing but in a different way. Never heard any Dane be like "I'm a proud Dane!!" if not as a parody
I like the fact that you guys made this video for people coming to Denmark, but for me born and raised here, i must say that i learned something as well. ill probably reflect a little more regarding the things i say to my not born and raised Danish friends. Thanks for the great video and laughs :D
That's such a great mindset, I'm sure they'll appreciate it - it's all about bridging the invisible culture gaps 😀Thank you for the kind comment, we're glad you enjoyed the video!
As a Brit engaged to a Dane, it too took some time for me to get use to my fiance's directness. Even when she would reply 'i don't know' to a question, I would be like 'are you frustrated/annoyed?'. Cos England that's how it be interpreted. Now I find it cute and admirable.
I'm also totally going to use 'i have doubts' at my workplace xP
Isn't it so funny how the same words can seem so different to those of us from different places? haha
We also find it endearing, but there were some confusing times when we first arrived in Denmark haha.
Making fun of you is a declaration of affection. I'd ever only laugh at somebody that I liked and I get all warm and fuzzy if it happens to me. Also self deprecating humor is very Danish, that way you invite others to have a go at you.
Well said! We both had that type of humor and personality before moving to Denmark, so I think that made the transition a lot easier for us. Our friend groups are have always been based around making fun of the others in the group, so that has helped us a lot over the years haha 😂
Danish humor can also be divided
Some have sacastic humor
And just ironi / dark humor not to be mean just fun. While some dont like that at all and can be afended if some one make joke on other behave. Reguardless of not ment negative. So importen to fell the person vibe before go joke in that way. All im say not all danes are like you just whrote far from
Sometime you have to be careful with the older generation. " Der sku' ik' grines!!! :( ".
But other times they cant stop giggling themselves.
@@anetteholmkjr5934 If you can't laugh at yourself, then how can you have fun? Learning Danish to visit a friend. Hun bor i Holbæk. Jeg har ikke penge nok, lige nu. One day. Undskyld, mit dansk er dårligt af
@@johnnylong03 that danish was spot on, and without mistakes. I'd have added an unfortunately ("desværre") after "har in the second sentence, but that's just how I express myself. Yours was good as it is.
I think you guys are mostly spot on. I would add two things.
The kvajebajer thing and owning up to mistakes in general is a very Danish thing. In work situations we like to say that those that make no mistakes are the ones who do no work. So in other words its okay to goof up and you should never be afraid of admitting mistakes. Other cultures fear bringing up mistakes which can lead to the mistakes not being fixed and bad stuff happening.
The last one about "thats how we do things in Denmark" might also be a curtesey thing. If it is not just about food but about politics or big issues. It might be that the Dane actually thinks that what you are saying is really wrong and that if the conversation goes further the Dane will have to use our directness and tell you why "your political system is wrong" (for example). So the Dane might know that you are heading into a topic that you will never agree on and is shutting it down to avoid getting into a real argument with you. Not saying that is always the case, just saying it might be :-)
Yes, thinks it’s really important that people’s and organization can own up to their mistakes. As only that way they can do better next time and also others can avoid doing the same mistake. I think that works really well in Denmark, in most fields anyway. But one area where it do not work, and it seems to get worse and worse is with the politicians, they almost never acknowledge their mistakes they comer them up and also comer up for others. That why politicians are some of the people I have the least respect for and trust in. Not that the Danish politicians are worse then those from most other nations, just the opposite. That’s probably one of the biggest problems with the world.
It is not typical Danish, it is very Dutch too. The intent is the same too. I bet it is the same too in Sweden or Norway.
We do do a lot of things that might seem rude, but it is just the directness and we usually don’t mean it in a rude way (as you said). One of my favorite weird things we do is when you have a “kagemand” (cake man) for your birthday. The cake man represents the birthday person, but the host (or sometimes the birthday person) has to cut the throat of the cake while everyone screams. It’s mostly found at kid’s birthdays or birthdays where only family is invited, but my friends from other countries definitely found that one a bit weird lol
I'm a dane and i know about the "kagemand" but never have i heard of the cutting the throat and screaming, or seen that being a thing. Sounds super weird
@@Enaevy im a dane and i have heard of it and seen it
Perhaps this is example of the Danish love of dark humour?
danes don't waste their time on big explanations. "Kort og kontant" is a good danish saying for it :)
btw nice videos they are really entertaining
koncist
Thanks so much, we're glad you like them. That's a great phrase - definitely going to remember that one. We might call it "short and sweet" and we love that way of operating now - it's basically culture shock when we spend any time in the States visiting family haha. They don't know how to take us now.
We have the same saying in Poland "krotko i na temat"
Me as a dane:
"who the f*** doesn't eat tacos with there hands"
😂🤣😂
We have videos 😂
Maybe a grandma from Jylland
I have seen Nederlands folk eat burgers with knife and fork.
I would also like to point out that often the “how’s your danish coming along” question, at least in my experience, can also be a way to offer help with the language itself or to figure out which language you’d rather speak at that moment. It opens up the possibility for you to ask questions about the language that a danish person can maybe explain, or for you to mention that your danish isn’t that great yet, and then we can switch the conversation to English. Most of the time it is also genuine curiosity. We’re often told that danish is a very hard language to learn, so we want to know your experience with it
As a Brit living in Denmark for nearly 30 years, I'd say learning the language is the main way to learn the culture. The Danes are often trying to be helpful and will often speak English to you if you let them, but to use a Danish expression, it's a "bjørnetjeneste", or in other words it's not doing you any favours! I do think it's partly about respecting the country you've chosen to live in, and partly about making your life easier!
Your pronunciation of "tillykke med fødselsdagen" was actually really good! Good job guys!
I love your advice of “consider the intent”. I love you perceptiveness and respectful way of looking at our culture. As a psychologist working a lot with foreigners this is something that I think can help a lot of people who have a hard time adjusting. However I think that your perspectives and experience as two American guys can be quite different then, say a person from Asian or Africa. Some Danes can unfortunately be quite hostile to people they don’t identify with as positively as Americans.
Hej Rune, thank you so much for the compliments and for watching our video. We're super glad you liked it 😀🇩🇰
We agree with you 100% about the difference between our experience and other foreigners from beyond America. We didn't in this video (but do in another) acknowledge that we have A LOT of advantages and privilege in how we are perceived as well as the benefit of speaking English and moving to Denmark with a job and the assistance that a corporate relocation offers.
@@RobeTrotting Watching your videos it really comes across to me that you are super aware of your positionality. I really like that and with your respectful and caring way of analysing a different culture, I think it becomes quite useful to Danes and nondanes alike:) In relation to your example about someone telling you not to park On the sidewalk. Something that really rubbed me the wrong way when I lived in the US was people using the term “you need to”. It felt so strange that someone could tell me about my “needs” to engage in a specific behaviour😂
Concider the intent....I think ( as a born Dane) this is the worst side of our national caracter, that it is regarded as OK to make fun on others expence, and if the victim dont like it the bully has every right in the world to be more rude, so the first insult is the smallest. Never had, and never will, get to understand that part of my countrys behaviour. I can much more relate to the spanish way of talking to eachother. There you only calls someone something bad if you dont like them. Much easier for everyone in the long run.
Americans,take everything said personally, they don't understand irony ,or,sarcasm.
As a Canadian living in DK, I had a lot of fun watching this! It made me remember when the Danish man who later became my husband and I had a club sandwich in a restaurant in Montreal. Yes, he did eat a club sandwich with a knife and fork 🤣. And what about this one at work:
Me: Do you know Julie? She is also Canadian
Danish colleague: : I guess so... isn’t this the one who was eating a sandwich with her hands at the lunch meeting? 🤣🤣
Hey Diane, so glad you liked the video 😀 It's so funny how far our Danish friends will go to avoid eating with hands - we've been using the knife and fork more than in the States but still can't get used to it for tacos or sandwiches 😂😂
@@RobeTrotting Haha! And don’t ever switch hand with your fork between cutting and eating!!! 🤣🤣 Glad that you guys also seem to enjoy living in this wonderful country 🇩🇰😁
I'm Danish, and I don't think we normally have any issue with someome eating a sandwich with their hands. That's literally what sandwiches were invented for 😂
But it doesn't mean you have to eat it that way, in my opinion 😆
I often eat a burger with utensils. I honestly think that's just easier if it's a large/tall burger, because then I don't get any irritating sauce on my hands 😂
Why make anything unnecessarily difficult or uncomfortable for yourself? Why not eat the way that makes you comfortable?
Though I have to make an exception to this idea when it comes to sushi, as there should be jail time for eating it with utensils. I can assure you that I've never witnessed such a pervesion, but I would call the police if I did.
If you know Danish open rye bread sandwiches, such as smørrebrød, you may know that we also regularly eat them with utensils, and they're also a kind of sandwiches.
#1 - Hvad laver du i Danmark? (What are you doing in Denmark) is also a way of asking for your occupation.
So when asked, what are you doing in Denmark, it might just be a Dane who have translated the words directly in thair head and are saying that, instead of translating the meaning, what are your occupation in Denmark :)
Yes, for sure. This is one that (unfortunately) many foreigners don't fully understand when they hear it the first time. It's just a nice way of making conversation and "breaking the ice" with a new acquaintance 😀
If a Scandinavian makes fun of your mistake it means they consider you a close friend. For example if you'd slip on some ice in the winter I'd laugh my ass of if you were my friend but if I didn't know you I'd probably ignore you and continue walking or check if you're ok.
Hej Anton, that's the best kind of friendship and why we really get along well with our Danish friends and connect on that level. 🇩🇰 It's very much our personality to joke around with friends that way, even to a degree that would sound horrible to someone who didn't know any better 😂
@@RobeTrotting Same 😂 when I'm out with friends i wouldn't be surprised if they thought we were having an argument or bullying each other. But when it comes down to it we'll always be there for them.
@@kohwai8321 Yes! The mark of true friendship - laughing and making fun like siblings because you're "chosen family" :)
And on that note, if you ever run into us in Copenhagen be sure to call us jerks and make fun of how badly we butcher the Danish language when we try to speak it hahaha
The thing to remember it's almost always making fun of the mistake... NOT the person that made it. Especially if it's something like a spelling error.... I recall (and I do hope I recall this as a true fact) when it was reported about the Queen's new 'textile gallery' in the news some... 10 or 15 or so years back.... but a newspaper or some such had printed the word 'Textile' wrong.... so it said Testicle instead.
That was FUNNY - cuz absurdity is the core of humor and very much so for many of us danes.
Also very British. We'll laugh at a friend who has quite clearly severely injured themselves, then gain our composure and begin to panic and call an ambulance lol.
🇩🇰🇺🇸 As a Dane this was fascinating. We mean well, but can definetely come across as quite rude. Tthe directness is everywhere and gets misintrepeted often. In my workplace millions are spent on extensive programs teaching colleagues how to give each other constructive feedback. It’s very real, and kudos to you guys for picking up on it. 👍
If you visit Japan you might want to practice some polite indirectness.
Being able to give someone some really useful feedback is a great skill, but you also need to look at a situation to see if the person can cope with feedback at that time. Sometimes it is just not a good time to be told what you need to know!
The use of the flag 🇩🇰🇩🇰🇩🇰 for birthdays and on the Christmas tree, really came into prominence after the war of 1864, when Denmark was reduced to a small nation state. The outside threat meant that national identity became all important.
haha spot on guys, you really getting a hang on denmark, i wish all foreighners and nationalitys could be as fast as you to grasp our quirkines ;)
so you get a flag and a thumbs up from jylland ... good video, keep them coming
Thank you so much - we hope that in some small way our videos might help some other 'outlanders' get the hang of things. We try to look at these topics as if we're explaining them to ourselves 4 years ago in our early days of living in Denmark 😀🇩🇰
You guys have an impressive insight and understanding of danish culture!
It is always good fun to come in here and reflect on how others see us and our quirky culture.
In Denmark it is important to understand our humor for us to not come across rude. It is often kind of dark and jokes are very often made on expense of you or the person making the joke.
So being able to joke around about your own mistakes and understanding that when others do it, it is ment as love. I think is important to understand when living here.
As always thanks for the videos!
We're so glad you like the videos and thank you for the kind words. We really enjoy making them and having a chance to really reflect on what we've learned over the last few years - and best of all we usually pick up a few more facts and background knowledge from the comments. We try to look at these topics as if we are talking to ourselves four years ago when we may have misunderstood the humor or other traits (to hopefully help some new outlanders) 😀🇩🇰
So much this. Dane here, and when I speak in any of the other languages I know, I deliberately try to never be funny. Danish humor often comes across as rude when translated.
as having Adhd as I have been diagnosed with in a late age, your video has been very helpful to me. Because even I am born and raised here in Denmark, there has been so much foolish things and words that I have been trying to fit out with in years... And now I know that they didn't said it to be rude, but only was iconic when they were saying what they said. Thanks so much for your video uploading 🥰🥰🥰.
I love your perspectives on Danish culture it’s really fun to learn about my culture from another perspective.
Personally, I use English curse words because the Danish curse words are mostly religious so it doesn’t after my taste have the same strong impact when you say (most of) them 😅
Thank you so much! We're glad you enjoyed the video. And thank you for your comment, it's interesting for us to be learning more about the background of the Danish curse words too 🇩🇰 😀
I mean we do have some really metal ones, like "kræft æde mig" that legit means, "May cancer devour me".
Very insightful. It is also obvious, that you are in Copenhagen. Had you been living in, for instance, rural Jutland, you might have noticed more significant cultural differences. I would say that jutlanders tend to understate things about as much as Americans tend to overstate them. The combination would be hilarious.
Fully agree with you. I work with people who are based in Jutland and there is a huge difference between there and Copenhagen. Their interactions with Americans is fantastic to watch 😋
@@RobeTrotting I can confirm. Sealanders are sooooo chatty. It gets annoying quickly. They're also overly effusive and give praise too easily. It gets uncomfortable to an extreme degree very quickly.
I find that people with overly bubbly personalities make me distrustful of their intent and - frankly - intelligence. I do try to be mindful of it, and judge the intent, however. But I'm very happy after five years living near Copenhagen to be back in the calm dark bleakness of Jutland.
I live in North Jutland now, grew up in the west. Both are places where action is judged more than words.
Also areas where you can be a raging alcoholic as long as you do your job.. but if you are on benefits there had better be a damn good reason.
About the parking, that was 100% trying to help you out of getting a possible parking ticket😘
I also wonder how old that neighbor was. Older people have that tendency of being a bit nosey with 'parking'. At least I've learnt so from my own grandparents! :p
The F-word is a gift to the Danish language! It's short, it's versatile. Verb, noun and adjective. AND we don't have the emotional "connotations" with the word, so we don't "feel" it, like we feel Danish swear words,.
We LOVE that part - and it has enough meanings that it's one of the most useful additions 😂
@@RobeTrotting Futher more, Danish swear words tend to be horrible, compared to something as natural as fåk. I mean, most of us do it, and it's nice!
In Danish it's more like:
May cancer eat me - Satan in Hell - may the Devil's lightning strike me - Satan eat me.
And milder ones spins around shit and turd.
In that comparision, FÅK is kind of cute!
Love your outtake on Denmark, by the way!
@@RobeTrotting there are nothing you can say where you could not fit the F-word in.
It can be used when talking about child birth, weddings and funerals.
When talking about love, food or sickness.
Anyway I can’t come up with a topic where it would not be fitting to use it in some way. Maybe you can come up with one? :P
@@ane-louisestampe7939 Where in Denmark do we use Devils Lightning and Satan eat me? :D
@@tommykoed7493 Det ved jeg den-onde-lyne-me-ikke! My parents are respektively from Vest Jylland and Vendsyssel, but I'm fanden-æde-me born and raised on Østfyn.
Hygge :-)
You nailed it!!. As a Dane, im having trouble seeing what wrong until you explain how you see it. It is excatly how we speak, and exactly how out culture is. Downplay many tings.
So glad you liked the video, and we wouldn't characterize it as wrong - definitely not at all. We really want this video to just help other foreigners know how to bridge some of the cultural differences (all of which are innocent and some are very positive once you understand them) 😀🇩🇰
Spot on !
Being from Denmark, has gotten me fired several times, due to honesty in conversations.
Surviving now being dishonest now.
Oh wow, where were you working when that happened? Mike deals with it a lot because he worked for the Philadelphia headquarters of his company before moving to Copenhagen and he's always advising colleagues on "how the Americans take feedback" haha. Americans also aren't used to the flat style of leadership in Denmark where you can have honest and direct conversations with your boss and even his or her boss.
@@RobeTrotting not really a long story or big deal.
Just told some bragging hot shots, that they were not all, they cracked themselfes up to be.
In other words, I exposed their incompetence.
Learned my lesson well. Today I,m considered to be good at what I do.
However I don't get involved with anybody at work. It's a super nacissistic enviorement, and everyone is the king of their own hill.
It's 100 % against my good upbringing in the 60's Copenhagen.
So now I lie, cheat, works 50% of my capacity, and management is 100 % satisfied with my performance.
Inside, I feel like a lazy crook. Only happy my mother ain't alive to see it.
@@jesschristensen7429 Stemmer på Nye Borgerlige?
@@jandamskier6510 kan ikke stemme.
@@jesschristensen7429 udlandsdansker?
8:43 When i attended afterschool (a danish, one year long boardingschool) there was a tradition of clapping everytime someone accidentally dropped and shattered a glass or a plate at breakfast or dinner. So this is very true
Ah, yes - we do that sometimes in American schools, and it's similar in nature, to just laugh at the situation and not the person who dropped the glass/plate. Of course, the American teachers try to stop it because they're afraid it's bullying.
Afterschool = efterskole? :P
That took me a few second to connect the dots. :P
I used to work as a residential advisor for American exchange students in Copenhagen, and I have definitely experienced how my Danish directness can be off putting to Americans. I think you nailed most of your observations although I am not so sure about the last one. I have found myself discussing cultural or other differences with Americans and saying "well, that's just how we do it in Denmark". It has never been my intention to shut down the conversation and I think most Danes are happy to discuss even rather controversial subjects as long as you are respectful and not trying to tell them how they should act - we have a bit of a little brother complex, I think. Such a small country who likes to think of itself as an important player on the world stage. When I have said "that's just how we do in Denmark" it's more of a "huh, I've never thought about why I do it this way - I guess it's just the way we do it here".
I think your first point about intent is spot on. If someone is asking you questions in a direct manner, it most probably just means they're actually interested in getting to know you. And you're absolutely right - it can be puzzling to a Dane how you would choose to come to Denmark of all places. I think we tend to think of our own country as a little bit dull. But nice and cosy. Kind of like The Shire in LOTR. But why would you go there if you aren't a hobbit, you know? ;)
About the swearing: I don't think it is only a case of foreign words sounding less bad to us although I think you are right about that. I do believe, because of our directness, we are much more tolerant of foul language in general. You never see swear words bleeped out in Danish music, movies or TV, and as a Dane i wonder why you do it. It is not like you don't know what's being said behind the bleep anyways :)
Oh, and whenever I have asked an American how their Danish was coming along I wasn't really expecting them to learn because why would you? We all speak English anyways. It was more of a curiosity because all we hear about from foreigners is how difficult our language is, so it is always good fun to hear about your struggles. Again, I think most Danes are pretty understanding of you if you won't put a lot of effort into learning Danish - especially if you're only going to live here for a limited amount of time.
Do No Try This: respond in Swedish when they ask about how your Danish is coming along
Hej Magnus, that's a hilarious idea for a prank video 😂
Magnus....Magnus......That is based on the pretext that the greater Danish population to some degree either speak or understand the Swedish language. Which is not the case. Geographical proximity does not in any way imply a lingual compatibility. This is proved through the USA/Canada relationship. Our two nations are sharing a vast border, yet, anything a man from Canuckistan says is incomprehensible. We don't speak French, and we don't think left 🤣🤣
@@thefreedomguyuk eye think 81million USA voters for Biden, more votes than any president in history, demonstrates yall are lefties now 🤣
@@thefreedomguyuk I think the joke here is that the Danes and Swedes hate each other (historically, it's mostly just "banter" these for lack of a better word).
I'm sorry, but everytime you try to speak Danish, I really appreciate you saying it right after in English, because I have such a hard time understanding you
Yes, we know it's bad but thank you for letting us try haha 😂🙈😬
@@RobeTrotting it's cute that you try
The parking one could actually be to help you avoid a parking ticket, because Copenhagen have the most parking attendees in all of Denmark, and they can be mean-spirited. I think you guys are spot on, and I'm watching your videos even though I'm from Denmark 😄😄
Very true, she definitely was only trying to help and was such a nice neighbor once we got to know her and her family. Thanks for watching, we'll keep them coming and soon we'll make some about our weird American that we learn about from living abroad 😀
i feel like us danes expect you to learn danish when you move to the country, since about 99% of danes also speaks English, and 30-50% also speaks either german or french. so its like: we can start out in your language (English) but you have to learn the language at some point in time
Very true Gustav, we are trying haha. It's important for others to do it as well, especially when it's easy and cheap (or free) to take lessons 🇩🇰😀
Helt enig! Gustav. Vi har også fået opbygget et demokrati, der kan giver os mere personlig frihed og ytringsfrihed end de fleste mener de har i USA. Det forpligter lidt hvorfor jeg gerne "sjæler" opmærksomheden for at støtte koreaneren YEONMI PARK der i sin flugt fra Nord til Syd Korea blev solgt i Kina til en kinesisk mand-hun var 13år. YEONMI PARK er nu i USA og er blevet Human Rights Activist, og fast besluttet på, at trods at være på Kim diktatorens dødsliste, at gøre det der skal til for at befri 25 millioner koreanere.
I don't think it is a particularly Danish thing to expect people to learn Danish if they move there. Anyone who moves to another country with different language/culture should learn the language and endeavour to at least understand the culture of the host country. It is about respect and civility. There is no point living in another country if you don't care to understand its culture and language.
@@williamjones4716 not talking about mastering the language at all! don't worry haha, but just learning som easy/normal stuff, but its all a grey area. but for example, I know an Italian guy who has lived here for 12 years, he speaks worse danish than I speak french, and I don't speak fucking french xD.
@@MTMF.london yeah, true, diddnt mean to formulate it in a way that meant it was a dnaish thing, but in this instance (the video is about dk after all) it makes sense to formulate it that way...
Actually, the woman who said, you shouldn't park on the sidewalk, is an ahole also by Danish standards... It's actually especially rude for a Dane, since we really don't like being confronted and told off. A proper Dane would have minded her own business.
Also... The person eating taco with cutlery is an elitist douchebag, and they should speak for themselves. I'm sorry, you experienced that.
Don't assimilate too much. All cultures need to be kept in check. Also the Danish. Keep being you, guys.
I kinda disagree. About the parking.
Loved the disclaimer 😂👍
I can't find my robe 😂
😂😂😂
Thank you 😂 us Americans always need a legal notice haha
🇩🇰🇩🇰🇩🇰
Very good pronunciation of "tillykke med fødselsdagen" - had a lot of practise? 😄
Haha, too many birthdays overall, but only four each in Denmark so far 🇩🇰😀
there is a saying in my family. when you fall your true friends are the ones laughing at it.
WOW. love the way you explained what can go wrong(and why) in translation when people speaks ok english but it´s their second language..
Hej Kim, we're glad you enjoyed the video! It's always funny to hear people say that things "get lost in translation" but when you really analyze examples - you notice how much it can happen every day 😀🇩🇰
I just love what you guys are doing. Please keep it up. Denmark is lucky to have you. I’m saying this as a Danish expat in your country.
Guys , this video is so accurate ! :D loved it!
Thank you! So glad you enjoyed it and we're sure you can relate 😀 🇩🇰
Denmark has both the oldest and the most beautiful flag in the World 🇩🇰 Well we did choose first...
And almost every country around us copied it.._
And they barely even tried to hide it haha. Although it could be worse, Liechtenstein and Haiti had the same national flag for years and never realized it until the opening ceremonies of the 1936 Olympics?! 😂
Yes! Descended from the heavens on an Estonian battlefield 🇩🇰😀
Well not exactly. It's not the oldest flag, but the oldest flag still in use
@@andreachristiansen9388 The oldest national flag still in use.
I really appreciate your understanding of the reason behind danish behaviour- that you get that something, even though most danes are quite good at speaking and understanding english, just dont translate directly from danish to english and the other way about. Also the concept of intent - it is a good point to make. We are very direct, so as you said we would come out and be rude or offensive, if that was our intent. But mostly we dont mean to make people uncomfortable, or be rude or offensive. We are mostly very inclusive, wants everybody to be at ease. We just go about it in a different way. Joking or banter is not to laugh at your expence, but a way to show the other person you are part of the gang, we like you, enough to include you in our jokes. Its a way of saying: you are one of us.
I would add that the "That's how we do things in Denmark" is also about wanting to give foreigners the authentic experience.
Lots of things require that you are doing it the correct way or understand it fully to enjoy it, and it usually doesn't come natural to foreigners.
Fish fillet is not a good dish if you don't add remoulade and squeeze a lemon.
Good point - on both the remoulade and the intention of the statement. It's all unique to the situation on how to take it but usually it's to help someone learn the best way to do things and get the hang of the "unwritten rules".
thank you i wondered why people from abroad found my "what are you doing in denmark" question invasive but now I know not to ask that 30 seconds in the convo lol
Hej Lucia, it's just a funny little way that sounds different than it's intended for native English speakers but it's totally an appropriate question as a get-to-know-you questions 😀🇩🇰 "what brought you to Denmark" may be more in line with what you're asking though, or at least it will not be mistaken as invasive or questioning out of suspicion.
Thank you for this video. It is amusing and it warms my heart. You really managed to be spot-on explaining these small but probably special parts of our Danish culture. Oh, and you guys are so both funny and amiable. I am honoured that you want to live in my country and teach others about us, both our good and our bad sides.
I love that you are now doing little funny skits to help with your top tips and observations. I think youre really hitting the mark in a nice way to both our lovely Danes and also us as foreigners. Cant wait to see more!
Thanks so much! So glad you enjoyed it - the skits just kind of came to us. At first it was tough to explain certain concepts and we found ourselves sitting on the couch having these dialogues and Derek said "we need to just make them skits" and he changed into his "American costume" and it was too ridiculous not to share haha
Its NOT called Remoulade sauce, its just called Remoulade
Ah, okay. Good to know. We don't use it much except for maybe the fish at julefrokost so that's probably why we couldn't order it properly haha.
Ha ha ha in swedish remouladsås.
@@annicaselberg3158 danish remoulade and Swedish remouladsås is also two different things. They don't taste the same 😉
Born in København, i rly love how you Guys read our culture, your understanding of the danish mentality. Keep it up. Love ya.
💜 Thank you so much
First og all: I really enjoy you videos.
When I was a kid, my mother talked of bad table manners as “eating in the American style”, Where you dont take time to appreciate the food, but cuts everything up, and then showels it in - so if anyone pushed me on that, I would most likely get defensive 😅
Hey Peter, thanks for commenting and your kind words, that story is so funny. I think your mother was right though - Americans do race to clear their plates haha. We also do the weird thing of using our fork as a knife to save time haha 😂🙈
Going out to a nice dinner in Denmark is so much nicer and more relaxing than in the States where they rush you out to fit more customers into the night. This did take us a little bit of time to convert to though (and we are thinking of making a video about dining out in DK vs. USA).
Q: How is your Danish coming along?
A: Fine. I’m taking Mumbling Classes at Statens Teaterskole at the moment.
Q: How's your Danish coming along?
A: Hold on, gotta check the oven.
The thing about downplaying things is maybe also related to the “Danes being humble” thing, as we kinda tend to squirm when being appraised or get compliments either personally or towards the country, its cities, looks, or even its weather 😂 like “oh thanks but you should check X out then, mine is nothing to brag about” - again, the Danish culture is actually very affected by the “Jantelov” (though not as much as it has been in previous years) which basically tells you to “not brag about yourself or your deeds. You’re not better than everyone else”. And so it can feel kinda exposing to be complimented in public because why are you the one getting complimented and not everyone else around you? Are you better than them? Will they think so?
But yeah it’s not as affecting as it once was, and of course I’m just writing my own theories here, and e.g. extroverts might completely disagree 😂
You're probably spot on that it's a bit of the Jantelov shining through - even if it's just in reference to the country. It's funny because we mentioned Jantelov in another video and we got so many comments saying "f**k Jantelov" haha, so we decided to keep it out of this video on purpose to avoid the strong emotional responses haha 😂😂😂
It may have some unwanted side effects for some people, but we think American culture could use a little bit of Jantelov.
@@RobeTrotting Long reply incoming:
Oh wow! I gotta see that video then, it just got kinda late yesterday :P
The thing is (at least nowadays, and at least I think so) that since Janteloven is so commonly known, this is actually when it IS so important to say "f*** Janteloven", because YES! You are/your achievement is that important that it's okay that you're getting celebrated and complimented, and that you have every right to be proud of it. But I feel that when people know about Janteloven and you know the one giving you the compliment also does, then the compliment can be received more as "wow, you really think so?" without any "guilt/shame/embarassment", because they know it's not really the norm but they chose to do so anyway because of you. And YEA, Janteloven is really a horrible tool to lower one's self esteem and teach that you should never be proud of yourself, so I get why people hate it too. So maybe it's important to take it with a grain of salt, as we say :) Either that or not follow it at all I'd say.
And yeah, agree hahaha, Janteloven could teach people with American and British culture to be proud and praise things without overdoing it all the time or placing things on pedestals :P
I do like the cultures' positivy about small things though. Like little sunshine people spreading happiness and optimism
I like the jantelov. My dad always said that I shold never feel more important than anyone else, because we are all humans.
I just found your sets of videos and I love 🫶🏻 them. I’m in opposite situation of you guys: A dane 🇩🇰living in the US🇺🇸. I’m impressed with your interpretation and articulation of our cultural differences. Godt gået, drenge. Jeg glæder mig til at se resten.
Wow, thank you so much for the kind words. We really enjoy sharing our experiences and trying to understand and dig into those little cultural differences - the ones that you also probably experience every day in the States :)
When i see the danish flag, i think “let’s celebrate.” When there an anniversary, or at Christmas too.
Hey Klara, the Christmas tree is such a good example of how the flag is used (and we totally forgot)! Thanks for the reminder 😀🇩🇰
@@RobeTrotting The flag on the tree is a silent demonstration(?) that got popular duting WWII since we couldn’t use our flag in public.
Hilarious how much you hit home with these points. Cool to see foreigners hellbend on understanding the quirks of our little country. Hope you'll thrive here. Velkommen. :)
Btw, it was a random suggestion on YT, better check out your other vids.
I laughed out loud at the skit with eating a taco with knife and fork. When I had lived for about a week with my American room mate in Boston, he asked me if Danes always ate like they were eating with the queen? I had never thought about it or realised how weird it would look to foreigners. I was very impressed at the ability of Americans to eat pretty much everything with just a fork. Even chicken, just using the side of the fork to basically crush off a piece.
It's so funny you mention using the side of the fork as a knife - we really had no idea how weird that is until we lived abroad and really examined our habits closely 😂 PS: we love Boston and hope you did too. It was our first travel destination together, so always special.
As an American, who needs a fork?! We eat everything with our hands! Hot dogs, hamburgers, pizza, chicken wings, fried chicken, sandwiches, french fries, fish and chips. Except Chinese food - when we use a fork. ;-)
Is it seen as rude or unhygienic to eat with your hands? I had an uncomfortable meal in an Indian restaurant when I was eating with my hands and no one else was.
@@areteeeye I assume in all counties it would depend on what kind of food you're eating
@@areteeeye Scooping food with your hands in any western country will be seen as extremely unhygienic even if it is Indian food. I know it's widespread in India and parts of Asia, but not in the west. There are distinct rules on how to hold utensils as well.
One thing I’ve noticed, as a Dane, in regards to our directness and sometimes relatively crude use of words, is that, since I talk with a lot of people, most of them American, on Discord for instance, I’ve kinda unknowingly tried to pick up that beating-around-the-bush thing, but mainly so when what I’m saying, I know is kinda... explicit, and I can’t think of any other way to say it.
Boy do I go around in circles in that roundabout when that happens, because I am basically incapable of doing that.
I guess it also doesn’t help that I have Aspergers (Autism) and ADHD (and other things as well). 😅
As a Brit, I applaud your beating around the bush. Which is an ironically short statement given the context, so this bit here is making up for it. lol
Spot on, again 😊 Quite impressed on how well you "get it"(/us), even when some things seem strange at first 😄 I can't even imagine how difficult it must be to "decipher" what is actually going on when meeting a new culture - especially when we appear to speak the same language in words and sentences, but use it very differently 😅
As a dane, I've corrected myself to say "what BRINGS you to Denmark" instead, as it can sound more neutral and not as accusing :D
Ah, great call. It’s something that is purely friendly but the expression can seem off the first time you hear it (until you realize the meaning is actually “what brings you to Denmark”) 😊🇩🇰
Also: "That's how we do it in Denmark" can also be an admission that this might seem silly to a foreigner, but we do not admit any judgement.
Totally agree - it isn't always a harsh stop sign, but sometimes a fun explanation that "no idea why we do it, but we do!"
This is actually really nice. I'm for sure gonna be aware of some of these things, especially cause I love talking with foreigners.
You two are awesome. The "how is your danish coming along" part. you nailed that one as well. Many of us are just curious. But a prime example
of when it's the expectation of foreigners to learn the language is the (now dead, may he rest in peace) Queens husband, Prins Henrik. If you want I'll try to clarify why he was prince and not king.
But he was of French origin, and pretty much everyone close to the royals speaks French, German, English and what not. So he didn't think it was and issue untill the media brought up how annoyed the danish people was with him not learning danish. A big part of the danish people pretty much disliked him and ridiculed him for it till the day he died.
The "legal disclaimer" was the funniest shit ever.
Haha thanks 😂 just have to protect ourselves 😂
Haha. Yeah, I guess us Danes have a bad habit of downplaying compliments. I’m a danish teacher and one of my supervisors is from America. Some times when he passes by in the hall, he throws out a “good job” or “good seeing you today”, and we (the teachers) chuckle a bit and say to each other that he’s being very American today (meaning it’s a bit over the top) all in good fun, though. (And you’re right, we only chuckle because we like him)
I’ve also had my share of supervisors who NEVER said something positive about our work, and I know what I prefer...
You guys are great! It’s fun seeing Denmark from a fresh perspective. :)
Dane: I have doubts. Can we have a meeting?
Me: Full blown existential crisis.
LOL That was the exact scenario for us the first few weeks of working in Denmark 😂
Hahaha great video guys. The skits are pretty spot on
Thank you, glad you enjoyed it! We'll keep them coming 😀🇩🇰
Its not really that we love the danish flag so much, as it just simply have become the symbol of celebration. :)
True. It's a cool way to feel included as a foreigner too 😀🇩🇰
Tal for dig selv, her i Nordjylland er flaget helligt 😅🇩🇰
Explaining this so well my dudes! "Not too high and not too low - like the Danish geography" had my laughing mate spot on :D It is clear you've had a lot run ins with Danes and the language and you really had the courage to be curious and actually understand what is beneath the more blunt exterior - really good examples the kvajebajer og kvajekage was really funny to hear you getting those right and shows you are really being laughed with - we do not want to drink with someone we actually think is a kvaj/ a jerk !! :D
-And YES I really DO love our flag and is SUPER proud of it - It to me resembles ONLY good things and great times!! This Video deserves a Dannebrog
FOREIGNER: The weather’s been really nice lately.
DANISH PERSON: Yeah, but it’s going to rain the rest of the week.
FOREIGNER: I’m really excited for the Christmas market.
DANISH PERSON: Yeah, but they’re so much better in Germany.
FOREIGNER: Well … I like your shirt.
DANISH PERSON: Oh, this? I’ve had it for years.
FOREIGNER (thinking): Holy cow, what a gloomy person!
DANISH PERSON (thinking): Hold nu op med at sige alle de rare ting, mærkelige fremling. Vi bruger ikke den slags her, og jeg ved simpelt hen ikke hvordan jeg skal reagere.
😂😂😂🇩🇰 So true - I wonder how many people were thinking that about us when we first arrived and talked to everyone that way haha.
@Humphrey GoKart.
Did you just reveal that you are actual of Norwegian decent?
@@Haardberg Because of the word "fremling"? No, it's just one of those Norwegian/Swedish words that the always-so-wonderfully-tolerant Danes find funny because they sound like someone trying to speak Danish and getting it wrong. I suppose it would be even funnier if the Danes themselves could speak their own language, but they seem to have forgotten it. Which reminds me of a Danish poem describing this very situation:
De fremmede der prøver
at lære hendes sprog
De synes det lyder li'somom
det var havregrød i kog
Og hver gang de prøver
at magte hendes mål
Der ler hun så hjerteløst og siger bare skål
Der ler hun så hjerteløst og siger bare skål
@@humphreygokart2135 mere at du skrev "hold nu op med at sige alle de rare ting". Rare, som betyder mærkeligt på norsk, men betyder noget andet på dansk. Og jeg kan kun få din sætning til at give mening ved at bruge den norske betydning.
@@Haardberg Interessant. Jeg slog ordet "rar" op i ODS. Det viser sig at være relateret til det engelske engelske "rare", som jo både kan have en positiv og en negativ betydning alt efter sammenhængen. Sådan var det åbenbart også før i tiden på dansk/norsk, men så blev landene (kort fortalt) delt og gik hver sin vej, bl.a. hvad angår betydningen af ordet "rar". Min hensigt var at give indtryk af en person (dansker), der bruger det som noget positivt, men noget positivt som han ikke er vant til og ikke helt forstår, og som han derfor også opfatter som "sært", hvilket jo sjovt nok lige netop er den norske betydning.
You have some great observations! I hope you're having a good time in Denmark despite all of our weird quirks 😊
funnily enough, an American song pretty much sums up the directness in Denmark about mistakes: "If you gotta be dumb, you gotta be tough" Often, and maybe more prevalent in Jylland, a harsh comment is often made about mistakes, but is tough love, no harm meant :)
This is probably the most important and straight to the point video in your repertoire - congratulations guys!
As a Brazilian (direct culture) who has lived in the US for a while (indirect) , this is actually helping me understand American culture better. I wouldn’t have thought anything of any of these situations. But my American friends probably thought I was a total weirdo...or worse: rude!!! LOL!
They probably know how to receive direct comments, but as a generalization, Americans also like to "sugarcoat" things, so they may have had trouble telling you what they thought at the time anyway haha 😂
We are interesting people! It's fun to look at our American cultural traits too since we live in a new culture now and they stand out to us more.
Ah...Brazilian is VERY indirect as compared to Danmark. I am also Portuguese, I know Brazilians and I have Dutch friends working in Brazil. It is their directness that sometimes causes Brazilians to actualy cry. Liek when you just say as a manager that someone did not do a very good job and needs to do better etc...
Hi guys. I love your videos, you are doing a great job explaining us Danes with Humor and a twinkle in the eye. My girlfriend is from Germany, she moved to Denmark last summer, and we too experience many of the same cultural differences between us. I spend a lot of time apologising 😅
Looking forward to your next video.
Thanks Charlotte, we really love living in Denmark and hope we can help people who are going through some of these things for the first time. Especially these tiny cultural differences can be tough, so we try to look at these types of videos as "what would have saved us a little bit of confusion or even hurt feelings to see a video about in our early days?" and we go from there. We hope your girlfriend is adapting too, it sounds like you're really supportive so she's lucky 😀🇩🇰
@@RobeTrotting I can only try to imagine how it is to move to another country. Therefore I think what you are doing will help a lot of people to adjust more easily with humour. Denmark can be a hard experience and I know a few that have thrown in the towel after a couple of years. It can also quickly turn in to this “Danes are also so and so, Denmark is also this and that” but in a very negative “Denmark bad = my own country much better” kind of way. Here I just have to praise you guys for an amazing attitude and how you choose to handle the differences.
I try to support my girlfriend as much as possible and try to make things a little bit easier for her.
We are watching the videos and I translate it into German, it makes her feel a little bit more at ease to hear that other experience the same as she😊
My Canadian boss brings up a subject of discussion , I chime in. We discuss solutions.
Me, a Dane: "Oh, do you want *me* to do it?"
Canadian boss: "Could you?"
Me: "Yes"
Canadian boss leaves
Me left thinking: "Does he want me to do it? I am able to do it, but does he want me to?"
Really good judgement and explanation, especially the intent part . You could have brought up the Danish concept "Jantelov" that basically states "You are not better than anybody else, so stop acting like it" it's a major part of the culture, you might have a new video there :-)
Nice video - spot on.
Fork and knife in the wrong hand though 😉😁😁
I'm just not used to using them at all if I can help it 😂😂😂🙈
Robe Trotting; it was just the Danish way to be direct 😉😁😁😁
I have no doubt, that I have said "I doubt that" to an american... I did not think that was rude. One thing I have learned when speaking with other non scandinavians is, to start with a little wasted small talk, instead of getting to the point at hand. :) Keep up the good work.
Totally understand - on its face it definitely doesn't sound rude at all! And that is a good way to start a conversation - we Americans just can't jump into business without a few minutes of nonsense!
Ha ha. It’s pretty funny about the flag. It’s sometimes easy to forget that the Danish flag isn’t a universal symbol of celebration. We put that thing everywhere. 😂 🇩🇰
It's super fun though and it's a nice tradition that everyone can participate in (even if they need a quick briefing lesson). Derek flew home for his nephew's birthday two years ago and brought a Danish flag - he was turning 5, so just happy to have a little fun waving it, but now he loves talking about "the birthday flag from Denmark".
as other already said... its also important to me, how others think about us danes.
Thanks for taking the time to make the video and share it
The funny thing is that any foreigner's failure to pronounce Danish usually is perfectly easy to understand for other Scandinavians, whereas the proper Danish pronunciation leaves us scratching our heads. When you said 'Jeg kan tale lidt dansk' you sounded more Norwegian or Swedish than Danish - you even had a bit of a sing song prosody going. :D
Also, "I have my doubts, maybe we should have a meeting" can also mean that maybe we should talk about it over beers. That happens with craftsmen when they have plenty of time.
Ah, that’s a nice thing - leaving it s bit informal is always a great way to communicate through a little confusion.
I’m Swedish so our culture is similar in many ways (the flag thing being different lol) and I really enjoy hearing your reflections on a culture similar to my own! The directness is something I missed when I lived in England because when people don’t actually say what they mean, I feel like they’re not being honest with me/that they’re being fake and I started to doubt if I could take anything the person said at face value. However, the intent is something I always went back to. Even if my initial thought was that they’re being deceitful, I learned to look for the underlying meaning. Whereas if a Swedish person is not being direct with me it really pisses me off 😅 I think a lot of it is just realizing and getting used to the things people do in order to be respectful according to their culture. I subscribed and going to binge watch your videos, or listen rather while I’m cleaning this Sunday!
Thank you for subscribing and for watching Sandra. Even though they're different countries and you went the other way, you can probably relate to a lot of the examples here (and other videos) since you spent time in the UK from Sweden.
You're spot on about the "seeming fake" aspect of not being as direct. Americans and Brits can often fall into that habit of "beating around the bush" instead of just saying what they mean. We find a bit of reverse culture shock now when we return to America to visit friends and family. Some even tell us that we are too harsh now haha.
If you cant count on something that sounds rude is ment to be rude.....then you cant count on something that sounds to be nice is nice. And thats the worst problem with Danish mentallity. You never know what to believe. ( Born Native Dane here).
Great video. You are very polite about our / the Danes' directness 😉 Did not really perceive that our language was so pool for words but now when you mention it it makes sense 👍🏻 I would like to add one thing to your list: personal space. In Scandinavia it is at least 3 feet which people from other cultures often misunderstand when we backs away.
Hej Kim. That's so true about the personal space, we should have included that in this or another video! It's very different from culture to culture and Scandinavian norms for space are good to be aware of 😀🇩🇰
🇩🇰 This was so spot on! I had such a laugh! I have lived in several other countries through my life, as well as going to Danish boardingschool with foreigners. I am so guilty of many of the things you mention! But you guys are so sweet and cute the way you go out of your way to be respectful! Loving it!
Thank you so much for watching Lisa and thank you again for the sweet comment.
It is really funny how many little phrases and comments can come off differently, even in the same language haha.
Our whole vision is always to pretend we are speaking to ourselves in the early days to help understand those funny differences 😃🇩🇰