I think we’ve all heard that, “Your kids don’t want your stuff.” Here is another side of it: “Kids! Your parents don’t want your stuff. Come and get it!“
So true…I have a huge farm house full of stuff from 6 adult children! Oh, and my stuff tooooo. When I visit my adult children now I bring a small yet full box of their stuff with me. There kids get excited! Sofar it is working yet very slowly, and I am in no hurry….yet!
Amen, Sister! I have oodles of things in my upstairs closets and bedrooms that my kids "want " but don't want to take to their homes. Then they "fuss" at me about my clutter🙄
1. Your kids do not want your stuff. 2. Sentimental items are the hardest. 3. De-cluttering is not a race. 4. It's okay to make mistakes. 5. Don't let guilt dictate your decisions. 6. Selling can be surprisingly rewarding. 7. Don't buy organizational tools first. 8. Your home is going to feel bigger. 9. Memories are not in the things. 10. De-cluttering can bring joy others.
I think the hardest part about decluttering in my home is that I’m the only one who wants to do it and there are 5 other people in the house contributing to the clutter. I think I’ll just start doing it on my own and hope I inspire the others to follow me. 😊
Once I started and purged a LOT around the home, my kids and husband saw the difference and how much better it was for our mental health and they soon followed on their own and tackled their stuff/rooms as well.
I'm 56. Been a lifelong concert goer, my fav band is Fleetwood Mac and Stevie Nicks, and have collected a large collection of music memorabilia. Knowing when it's my time I know my family would just have thrown all of it in a dumpster so I sold most of it on ebay. I have enjoyed having this stuff for decades but it's been stored in bins for decades. It's time for others to enjoy this stuff now. Hopefully my stuff will live a long long life bringing joy.
My kids actually wanted a lot of my stuff. When I decluttered, I gathered up tons of stuff and told them to come get whatever they wanted before I sold it or gave it away. They took about 90 %😊
My siblings and I all have lots of things from my parents, and there have been fights over some items. Most of it is from other countries, and made of actual wood.
Yeah, just ask if others want it and be fine with any answer. We give most of ours kids clothes and toys away when they grow out of it (if they are okay with it) and many friends are happy about it.
I liked taking my grandma’s stuff when she died and my mom’s stuff when she died. It wasn’t much, and the things I got were practical and usable, but I was very grateful for the stuff I got ❤
My solution to decluttering is i have stopped purchasing new items many many years ago. I am 56. I just kept on using what i have. Some articles i also donated. Gradually the stuff around the house decreased. Now i have only essential items in my drawers and my single almirah. Most of the corners in my home have indoor plants or cut flowers in vases. I am very fond of flowers and gardening. The house is peacefull, clean and has positive energy around it. Also since i stopped purchasing new things i was able to save money for rainy day. Even small amounts of money saved on regular basis turn into large sums over the years. This gives peace of mind as one is prepared for any emergency.
Me too I just stopped buying. I used up all the things I had and that decluttered eventually. So simple, and you don’t have to give away things you have and have loved.
I have downsized, it’s so hard bc everything has a memory attached. You’re right about what your kids want, nothing. I saved school stuff from my son and have pitched a lot. He had a long hair “tail”and when we cut it I saved it. When I tried to give it to him, he thought it was disgusting!
Everything! My husband died 5 years ago. I had to breakup housekeeping in two homes. One a beautiful, large Georgian Colonial, and one a mountain home we had just loved, both were furnished with antiques, inherited treasures, and a lifetime of collecting “the perfect fit”. Frankly, they both were magazine worthy…I was able to give, sell, and donate much, but time constraints meant I had to put the rest in storage. Now, I have to dispense with the treasured core that is left, as my new “life”, sadly, will not accommodate them. I know the ropes with 5 adult children who loved the homes of their childhood, but cannot squeeze more items into their’s now. My mother had to do this 50 years ago, and her adult children (6 of us) suffered saying good bye, as much as she did. There is an “identity” in these treasures. Smaller may be necessary, but not better.😢. So, with heart in hand, I will begin anew in 2025, and let go the past into a future, that by no means is what I envisioned when building my homes piece by piece for 50+ years. Holding my nose, I dive into the familiar deep end.
I asked my (adult) son what he will do with my collection of about 5000 printed photos, when I'm "gone". He said, he would digitize them. So I bought a scanner and scanned all of them in high resolution, sorted them into folders and uploaded them on google drive where I and my family can access them anytime. Also, they can be printed again anytime if necessary. Best decision ever! :-)
I was a seamstress & furniture upholsterer for many years of my life. I loved making things, & taking some old, ugly things, & making them look brand new & beautiful. I collected beat up old furniture and took it all apart, refinished the wood, repaired it, if that was required _ reupholstering it. Then I'd sell it, & I'd earn very good money for all the work I did. I loved doing the work. However now I'm not physically able to continue doing all the work I had done for many years. The most difficult decision I have to make is to give away the sewing machines and most of the tools etc, that I have had for so many years. It's difficult to part with them. After watching your video, now I realize how much I must let go of 70%of all the things I still have. There must be some one in this world who would love to have the things I no longer need to have. And when I am finished donating it all to salvation army or Good Will I will have room to have a comfortable place to live with my precious kitty.😊
@Martibee4140. I absolutely feel your pain as my mother used to do that years ago. Please try to search out someone who would be interested in learning how to upholster furniture. Perhaps look for someone whose just wanting to get started in this field but doesn't have any equipment. Strike up a conversation you may be surprised who might be interested. Then when you feel comfortable gift them with your gear if they'd be interested. I think you would feel better doing that. We made many trips to private charities and Goodwill after my mother and mother-in-law no longer needed their things. What we found out was the charities did pick up items but not all. But Goodwill was the most annoying. As we dropped off items they would turn their noses up or flat out refuse to take. Or their eyes would light up and that item was shoved to the side. We felt it was going be placed in a friend of a friend's home or either sold for some side business side hustle scam. And that was as you were dropping items off. Please see if you can be the person that starts someone's dream off by supplying them your machines and expertise. If they have to go... might as well go to someone whose interested in your life's work. Just a thought
@@martibee4140 those sewing machines are highly sought after now. I make handbags that I gift and donate to charity auctions. That hobby brings me a lot of joy.
I also was a sewer. I never liked to get rid of the remnants. I found out that my local homeless shelter took remnants! Volunteers would make quilts and other items for those in need. Your items may be extremely useful at such a place. You may also consider giving courses (with a helper to do the harder work) to others so you can pass on your hard earned skills.
Great that you could sell and make pretty good money, and I'm sure will continue to be rewarding when you donate. I paint and have a lot of paintings that no one wants, or at least don't want to buy. People say paint for yourself, true, but it's more stuff in the long run. Maybe I'll try digital art, but it doesn't excite me. 😞 As the other commenter said share your knowledge somehow, I think we both have a gift that we should pass on somehow.
I am currently going through my scrapbook stuff. Punches, papers, embellishments, etc. I’m selling what I can for pennies on the dollar. I know the people buying it are extremely happy to get these items for a fraction of the cost. That makes me happy. It helps me forget that I’m selling because my arthritic hands can’t use these things anymore (I am only 63). When you spoke about the challenges of getting started on a declutter. I had to work through that when my dad passed away. I stood in his basement workshop. He had 50+ years of stuff. We called it Neverland, because if it went down there, it never came back out. I remember being so overwhelmed. It was dusty and dark and full to the brim with things. I stood there crying, basically paralyzed by not knowing where to start. Then I told myself pick a shelf. That is exactly what I did. When that shelf was clear, I moved on to another. It took a month of weekends, but I got it cleared. I promised myself that I would never do that to my children, and I won’t.
The weird thing about getting rid of something that you have some attachment to (whether rational or emotional), is the minute it’s gone it’s a relief.
That's how I feel, too. I have not missed one thing that I've gotten rid of. Not one. But every day I appreciate the tidier, uncluttered spaces in our house that we created by getting rid of those items.
I find it easier to take everything out of the closet.... vacuum & clean the empty closet..... then I put back clothes that I want to keep (organizing them by item & colors) and then I can see what I have, that fits, that I like, etc. You see how nice your closet looks..... and then the items that are left over, or don't fit, don't bring you joy....... donate, sell, or throwaway.
My mother suddenly passed away 6 months ago at age 89. I took care of her for her last 14 years. My 4 brothers and 2 sisters don’t want her things and I find myself feeling I don’t want to dishonor her by just getting rid of her things. Her pride and joy was her wardrobe as she was a great dresser with her conservative and preppy taste, always wearing matching items. I have my own clothes and my own huge wardrobe so I also, with all due respect to my mamá, don’t want her clothes. I have a niece, one of her granddaughters, who did want a batch of her clothes and happily took some. It turns out the waitresses at a restaurant she frequented almost daily, want her clothes. I’m doing this in phases as I already placed a batch of her clothes in a huge bag, and into the trunk of my car. BUT I haven’t been able to give the bag away yet as I get a little emotional, which I know I’m not ready to take THAT step yet. Fortunately, the patient waitresses understand what I’m going through. Plus I know they will love having her clothes. And this makes me feel as if mamá is helping others. 🙏🏼🌺❤️
Good for you!! You have taken steps and that's what gets us to where we want to be. Plus, like Jennifer says in the video, you are making people happy.
@@JS-oq5go I agree. In my 20s, I would have wanted a lot of things from my mom's house because I was setting up my own place, with little money but, after being married and having children, I can only think of one thing I would have wanted--a round, gold-flowered frame mirror from 1939 that they had since their marriage but, even that, (a sister has it) I am fine without as I have my own mirrors already in place that I like a lot! ;-) I agree that the kids mainly want the $$$$.
My mother had beautiful clothes too. I held onto some of her nicer things for a while because of the smell and they were things that made her feel beautiful. The time came and I was ready to let them go. Like you not all at once. The perfect person came along and I know my mom would have loved for this person to have her things. You will know when it’s time.❤
Haha, one of my sons has just moved out and has taken loads of my stuff including a few things that I wanted to keep, but let go to him. He still wants a few things that I still do want to keep so he will have to wait until I peg it.😂
My daughter comes over and does what she calls, “shopping at the House of Mom.” Anything she wants, she can have. She loves my taste and my mad shopping skills at local thrift shops.
My daughter also shops my closet for extra blankets, candles I haven't burned yet sometimes cleaning supplies, lol. She makes less money so I don't mind most the stuff she takes I dont even miss. Same with my pantry
Clothes are hard for me. I have a closet full of clothes I don't wear. I figured if I don't buy anymore clothes, then when the ones I wear a lot get old and worn, I can replenish them with the ones in my closet. I did do a clean out when I retired of all my work clothes. I gave them to my cousin because she had an office job. It's the rest of the dresses, skirts, and tops I have held on to. I think it's time to get rid of these things. I have an old farmhouse in the country. When I retired and bought the property , I started a large vegetable gardening, began caning, raising chickens and hens and not really going out to fancy places. I wear jeans , sweaters and shirts all the time now. I think this video put things in perspective for me. Thanks for the great advice. I'll start tomorrow.
I remember those creepy sad clown paintings! My mom had one in the kitchen wall thst would stare at us when we ate. Hated it! Don't know what happened to it, haven't thought about that for decades!
When I downsized my home at retirement it was an eye opener with all the stuff I had accumulated over the 18 years in that house. As a newly divorced mother of two I had an emotional attachment to retail therapy. Upon putting my house up for sale I rented a bin and had literally purged a tonne of junk. Much of it came out of the crawl space which I had not looked at in years. All that money wasted on stuff. There it was staring back at me in a full large bin. My kids did get to furnish their homes with the sofas ,coffee tables and other large pieces of furniture I was no longer needing. The home I purchased is a small cabin by Georgian Bay in Ontario. Too small for the kids to move back home.... I still had to get rid of more stuff but it was much easier the second time. I hired a professional organiser this time. Best money I ever spent. I still have clothing to tackle and small things that have made its way into my office space. And old papers that are no longer relevant. It's a process for sure but I am far more intentional with my purchases now. Plus a tight budget dictates what not to buy.
Taking a picture of items that evoke fond memories is a brilliant idea. I have a lot of antique glassware and serving dishes I inherited from grandma and other relatives and used to put out on the table at Thanksgiving. Haven’t done so in about 30 years and they’re being stored in a cabinet. I’m 72. It’s time to get rid of them but who can? Pictures can help.
I'm your age, also, and am selling things on Marketplace. I had a beautiful punch bowl, embossed, with all of the accoutrements to go with it but felt so good when someone bought it and was so happy to have it!
This works if you back up the photos. I had photos of my mom's apartment and all her cute things just after she passed away. Then my house was broken into and my laptop was taken. There went the photos
@@lesliek4954 even sadder is a woman who recently had her house broken into and many things were stolen. She has appealed online for the return of only 1 thing: a small silver box with her young son's ashes in them. She must be devastated 😔
Going through it now, not just with my own stuff ( plenty of that) but also my mother's stuff. She grew up during the depression and was afraid to part with anything. She had downsized several times already but still hung on to the box of dried-out acrylic paint from the 60's. Absolutely no good to anyone. I tossed it with no guilt at all. She had a stack of maybe 100 paper bookmarks, most of them free in charity donation requests. She kept every free greeting card that came in the mail - two large cartons of those. Many shoeboxes full of recipes clipped from magazines. It's easier to declutter someone else's stuff. I try to look at my own stuff objectively like that. Two years into this project, and a long way to go. Your suggestions are very helpful.
My dad helped me declutter, when I was in recovery. Mom had spent years sending me stuff I never wanted & didn't have any sentimental meaning for me. Guilt kept me from getting rid of this stuff she'd paid to ship to me. We boxed them up & he delivered them back to her. Lol they're probably stored in that box still waiting to be tossed out, after she passes. My brother & I already know that dumpster rental is not cheap.
Books are hard to discard but not really a problem for me. They sit on my shelves and I don't feel guilty looking at them. I just try to keep the quantity such that they can all be on the shelves vertically with no double-stacking, storage boxes, piles on the floor, or other nonsense. When I start having to park books horizontally on top of other books, it's time to read faster or let some go. Loose paper is my personal bugbear.
Books - letting go of books was hard until I admitted I did not want to read some of them and had no room for new books I DID want to read. Building a Little Free Library of my own was a big help in unhauling unloved books.
The hardest things for me to let go of are my parents’ and my dogs’ things. They’ve passed away, so their things ignite the memories. Yes, memories are stored in our hearts, but the material things trigger those memories. I am afraid of forgetting so much. Maybe I will try taking photos.
Taking photos is a great idea. You can keep those photos and remember those moments when you look through the photos. Maybe you can even add some in a journal and add memories next to the photos.
I know what you mean. Sometimes after I sketch things in my journal, even though I am no artist, I feel I have had the necessary time, and the memory comes back just as rich with a sketch and a few thoughts written down.
My kids already labeled items that they want. Artwork on walls, knick knack on a shelf, books on bookshelf, whatever the item may be they have a name tag on the items on back or bottom. If tag isn't functional we also have pictorial record of everything that is wanted. Each kid has a copy along with our attorney. Everything that isn't claimed can be auctioned, sold or donated. This is all reviewed yearly with the kids. Some things are added some things are removed and now the older grandkids are laying their claim to items they want passed on to them. Our kids also started doing the same with their kids as part of their estate planning
The entire emotion of decluttering. My husband and I’ve been married for 42 years and we have accumulated a lot of stuff, even though we have moved all over the country. The idea that nobody wants my stuff, the things that I have loved and taken care of and used for all those years Probably just to go to the dump. My daughter is zero sentimental. She is a minimalist to the core and wants nothing. I’m just trying to come to grips with all of this as I start decluttering my home. Since November 1, we’ve gotten rid of almost 750 items. Which sounds wonderful, except unfortunately you can’t even tell. 😢 we have decided to do a little more the rest of this month and then in 2025 we are taking one or two rooms a month and doing a deep clean and decluttering. I’m hoping by this time next year we will be living in a clean peaceful decluttered house. 🎉
You may not think it is noticeable, but 750 is A LOT less you have to do later! I 🙏🏽 that you can focus on one high-impact area to encourage you every day.
When we had to sell my parents house because my mom wanted to go to a retirement community to live, I started with one room at a time. When it got to things that maybe family wanted I put the items on her dining table called everyone over (they came at different times) and told them to take what ever they wanted. It made my mom so happy to see what they wanted to take and she told them the story behind it. So she got to see her stuff taken by family and they learned where it came from, how old it was and who they got it from. If your parent is ok with decluttering that way it can be very fun for them. The rest of the items were sold in a garage sale and what wasn't sold went to charity. And mom took what was her favorite things to her new apartment and she has been happy living there now for almost 3 years.
When my parents retired & moved , they downsized ; after my father passed , mother moved / downsized again . Each time , my brother & I were given " first choice " & then mother offered things to other family members & close friends . Also some things were eventually sold & some donated . It was a gradual process , w/ tho't , caring & sharing . 🥰
These were great tips. I’m 3 weeks in with “Swedish Death Cleaning” and at the age of 53, my home has never felt more calm and relaxed. I wish I could have done this years ago. I’m letting go of all the things I thought people weren’t “allowed” to get rid of….old glass Christmas ornaments from my childhood, high school yearbooks, my great grandmother’s china set. I haven’t felt the slightest bit of discomfort in parting with any of it. My issue is with my grandmother’s collection of cut glass. I want to get rid of it, but I just don’t know how to go about selling it. It’s a huge collection and hasn’t been out of storage for 20 years. I’m definitely not attached to it, but I’d like to see it go to a collector who will love it and cherish it the way she did. I’ll figure it out eventually. In the meantime, I’m enjoying all of my newfound space and the way life is just easier without all of this stuff.
Amazing. I’ve been researching Swedish Death Cleaning and really want to try it. There is so much stuff we hold on to because we ‘should’. Good luck with your grandmother’s cut glass. I hope it finds a good home.
I've lost everything I own three times. I wish I had my yearbooks. But I'm also not mad about it anymore. Life goes on. I have my sports equipment and my kitchen.
@ I’m so sorry. I can’t begin to imagine how hard it is to lose everything all at once with no say in letting things go. It’s really not letting things go; it’s having things taken. My heart goes out to you. Maybe your high school has a facebook group that you could ask around to see if anyone is parting with their yearbook(s)? High school wasn’t a good time in my life, and having them on my shelf was just a reminder of unhappy times, so it was easy for me to toss them. I do hope you are able to track down a set for yourself.
@ one other idea is to try thrift stores in your hometown, if you’re still near there. I’ve actually seen some yearbooks at thrift stores and even on eBay. Best of luck to you.
@kawarthalakeside I've already done my death cleaning, honestly do it. It feels so much better in my home. I dont want to leave everything for my 3 children to do when I'm no longer here. They don't want all my stuff either. They have their own homes and contents.😊
Definitely sentimental items that are antique. My mom was a dealer and selected the most beautiful items for me. However, it’s not my style. I’m 66 and over trying to get a living space to accommodate her things. Zap! Sold, donated or given away. Now I’m starting over and completely decorating for myself with what I love and want suits my personality.
I agree with you a 100% ... It's a real pity one has items in ones life one doesn't like but one sticks to for reasons of false loyalty ... We need space to CREATE NEW MEMORIES !
Wow, that is what I'm going through right now. I've been redecorating my bedroom. I have a huge ugly armoire in the room that is my mother's. It's an absolute eye sore. She is so upset with me that I don't want it anymore.
Thank you for saying that! In my will, i have specified that all my furnishings & and other stuff go to those in genuine NEED. And, at 70 years old, i think twice & thrice before buying anything new. In fact, i've never felt more in touch with my mortality. I was walking around in a big box store the other day thinking, while everything was beautiful, my nest feathering days are behind me; i'm able to admire beautiful things without taking them home now. Books and flowers, are the only exception. Thank you for your video.
@@Cindy-beeAnd by giving it away sooner, rather than later, there is a greater chance the clothes will be in style & others will want to wear them (not just go straight to landfill). 😢❤😊
if you spend some time in thrift stores and consignment shops you will realize how much beautiful clothing is available out there. i give generously to my local thrift stores because i have been rewarded many times over with absolutely amazing finds for a few dollars. if you do lose weight, reward yourself with the thrill of the hunt! saying this, i still have a tote of old pieces that i know i will likely never fit into, but one day might have a special young person to share them with!
I'm in my 60s and I lived in my parents' house all my life since my mother always said to me, why would you go take an apartment, there is plenty of place here for you. After she became sick and had to be placed in a home(25 years ago), my boyfriend (now my husband) came to stay with my father and I. He brought a lot of stuff that took years to declutter. For years, I tried to keep everything tucked away and neatly put in closets. But, then he started to buy a lot of CDs, DVDs then blu-rays, guitars, acoustic pedals etc. These are not garbage, but over time they simply started to be a bit overwhelming. I tried to limit them to our big family room downstairs and one spare room upstairs, but, it was still bother me. So, after my dad passed away, I started to give away all my parents' stuff. All the cristal (that I don't use or like), bed sheets (we had 40 sets for 3 people, my mother was obsessed with clean sheets), towel, dish towels, linens of all kind etc.... After 2 years of giving stuff away, many of them being sentimental, I feel much better and don't miss anything. I gave most of it to family members or friends who knew my parents and I know they were happy to get these items. But, I still have a lot of recorded tapes that my Dad use to record of him playing the guitar(I really seem to be attracting people who love guitars) and now the camera it was recorded on doesn't work and can't be repaired and it would cost too much to have it transferred without knowing if it was worth it. So I feel very guilty to let these go. But there are a lot. And since I already know that my husband will have trouble parting with his items, I have to make this sacrifice. But, since we don't have children, I know that those things will only interest me, so I have my memories in my heart and in the end, it's enough. Because looking at footage of people you loved that aren't there never feels very good to me. I have trouble even with pictures. I always feel depressed after looking at pictures of my mum and dad. But, watching channels like yours certainly help to realize that we are not alone in the same situation and it make the process much easier and keep our motivation going. Thank you for taking the time to do them and share your experience with us.
Thank you for honestly sharing your experiences. I am 73 and got overwhelmed with stuff that has taken decades to divest myself from; a lot of it being guilt for items I should love that don’t serve me now. I understand your comment about old photos being depressing. I’ve culled about 10 boxes of photos from two sets of grandparents, an aunt and uncle, my parents, and myself down to about three. I hope to get this down to at least one max, with a scrapbook of photos of my musician parents for my son. During a recent morbid conversation with a friend, we talked about people coming for us, and I said I want my dogs to come for me. She said don’t you want any people? I loved my parents but they were always at each other’s throat and no I don’t want anything more to do with them. Nor do I want my lying aunt or any of her relatives coming for me. My grandparents were lovely but that was a lifetime ago. I don’t want to go anywhere if my pets won’t be there anyway. I need to keep pushing stuff out the door and prepare. I’m not getting any younger and well I’m still able to I need to get rid of all this stuff and travel.
Regarding your videos that need to be converted. My local public library had some of that equipment. I think our library is exceptional with the amount of things available, but it is worth checking into. It is time consuming to do it yourself, but most of the time you can also multitask. Some equipment might be available to take home, but if your library has it, you might have to do it there. I digitized all the family movies and shared them (usb drives) with brother, sister, & their families.
@@SoundofSilence492 I realize as I'm addressing these downsizing tasks that I should have done it sooner in my 50s. The more you wait the more those objects have power over you. But, now that I have started, I feel my motivation growing each day and now it's like a challenge to let go of things and when I succeed I can feel the endorphines released by my body almost. It has a nice calming effect and it's so liberating. I just hope my husband will take example on me at some point and let go of some of his things too. I hope you reach your goal and be able to travel. Life is made to be enjoyed! :-)
@@donnaharris9270Unfortunately, my local library doesn't provide that service. But, when I think about it, I already archived some of it and I still have some on digital tapes that go in a camera that still works. So, it's not that dramatic if I lose some. Looking at this kind of thing depresses me more than it does me good. It's more the guilt of getting rid of those things that is difficult. But again, my memories are in my heart and not on tapes. What's on tapes is just a tiny, tiny part of them. And sharing these emotions here makes you realize it and that a very good thing! :-)
Why live your life as though you were dead, and getting rid of stuff that OTHER people, internet people TELL you to do. Perhaps you can make your own decisions, and you aren't telling them what to do.
You are reacting to a very nice realtor, TELLING you on the Internet what to do! What’s the difference? You are being told, very clearly,, what to do, yet you think others making a decision that doesn’t fit with yours, or the presenter are living their lives ‘as though [they] were dead!’. Really? Where have YOU been? I don’t disagree with the presenter in many ways. But, I an experienced enough to know that history really does matter, and not just family connections to it. Where I live (U.K.), the antique business is alive and well, and often the biggest market place is in countries like the US, with limited history. I have witnessed small historic (even household) items being sold at a price you could by and apartment for in the US.
Sentimental items are priceless, BUT what are they costing you - if the price you are paying is stress, strained relationships, no room/time for daily living, future burden for loved ones, etc, THEN maybe your priceless treasures are costing you too much😢. ❤😊
Yes, but if those items don't make you feel good when you look at them or pick them up, that's my trigger to let them go. Someone else will love them, someone younger with many years left to enjoy them and you might get $$$ from them, if you want to. I like giving to the women's shelter here.
I relate. I have some antique doll furniture made by my great grandfather. I have ended up with it probably because no one else wants to be the one to let it go. I need to build my declutter muscle so this too can leave.
About 35 years ago I bought a bunch of yarn for my great-aunt who was going blind, but could crochet a certain stitch by feeling it. I thought she could make herself a nice blanket. She gave ME the blanket back, and now I have guilt trying to get rid of it. I don’t use it. I really don’t want it. All I think of is how I wanted to do something nice for her, and she in turn wanted to do something nice for me. I feel like such a bad person. The guilt is too much.
@@KSt-nv8eb You did do a nice thing. She did a nice thing. Take a picture of it and give it to a thrift store. You are a good person who found a way to grow a relationship with your great-aunt! Keep that in your heart and your head. Give the blanket away!
The best thing you can do for yourself and your kids is to clean up your life and streamline before you aren’t able to. When my mom passed she left a big suburban house full of stuff that had been accumulated over her lifetime. Attic, basement, garage. It was an incredibly difficult job to clean up, pack up and dispose of. I have to admit I resented her for putting that on us. And don’t let your guilt over the money you’ve spent on the stuff keep you from getting rid of it. That money is already gone. Keeping the unused item isn’t bringing it back.
I am so glad I have no problem getting rid of stuff. I absolutely hate clutter. Always have a give away box. Charities appreciate so much your old stuff and unwanted gifts. They survive with these items. I’d rather regret getting rid of something than having stuff pile up. Yes, I’m a neat freak and proud of it!!
I went through all my photos and mementos from my children and gave them to each one of them. They now have the opportunity of saving them or throwing away!
Thank you!! I am 51 with 10 children and many years ago. I was frustrated with the amount of clutter in my home. My dear father-in-law said “go easy on yourself. Remember, there’s a lot of people in your house so there’s a lot of stuff” He was right! I often watch hoarders so that I don’t feel so bad -believe me I am not a hoarder! it’s just hard for me to feel like my house is clean when I have extra clothes piled on the couch books on the floor instead of on the shelf, legos under foot and don’t get me started with the laundry room! But, because of special people like you, I have a really good start on having a cleaner home. I do teach my children to clean and that does help!! Do keep the videos coming, they really do inspire.❤
I bought my family home and 3 generations of stuff in the attic and cupboards. We moved in after my last parent died. It hadn't been empty for 30 yrs., from my 4 siblings and parents. So I moved in with my family of 5 stuff. Everyone wanting to store but not take! Took me 8yrs then 2 more moves to get it paired down. My kids on their own, bought "their" stuff at Walmart. Gave it away when they moved, and bought new Walmart. It's a new generation. Nothing is passed down thru generations, no family heirlooms today. Once it was finally gone, it was a breath of fresh air@
I agree, some years back I took pictures of various things I wanted to remember before I got rid of them - childhood toys, exam pieces/pictures I had done for my school art exams, that kind of physical thing which you just want to be able to see and remember occasionally. Incredibly stupidly, I did not back them up onto a small SD card, USB stick or similar. I also had lots of photos of several years of my son's younger days on the same computer, which completely died and all of the stuff on it was corrupted and irretrievable. So, they are all lost forever, unfortunately. My top tip is, large capacity SD cards are very small and store a lot, so get those and back up your photos. Or, if you have a heck of a lot to do, you could buy a huge capacity spare USB drive, which still takes a lot less room than the physical objects. I still don't trust uploading anything too personal to the cloud - call me a dinosaur - but it's a nice compromise, the SD cards take very very little space and hold a LOT of memories.
🤣 My daughter just came out of my closet with my black leather boots proclaiming them “fire” and asking if she could have them. Now, I’m looking for new boots and nothing fits and they don’t seem to make them out of leather anymore. Point is, you might be surprised what your kids do want!
I just declutterred my rec room. The things I have most difficulty getting rid of are some antiques that belonged to our family or a family member that has passed that gifted me with an item. It’s true that my home feels more calm especially in that room that I can now enjoy more. Great advice as I have just gone through a lot of stuff. Some I kept and maybe in the next round it will go as well. It can be so hard for some things like a letter from my dad or a note from my mom, even old birthday cards. Mostly because I know that I will never get any more of them.
I have my mothers things she wrote and my grandmothers letters and hers ! My grandfathers ids and birth certificate from 1885 , from Asturias , Spain , etc… probably my children will not want them but I did ! I appreciate so much my mothers incredible work for education and her glorious humanism to others I can’t let those go ! I will donate her library to the University where she worked and made the new career Orientation in Dominican Republic . There is a library under her name . And 3 Schools ! Seeing this made me think I will donate all to the library of the University some day soon . She pass away at 100 years old !
I have been decluttering for years and have had trouble with "expensive things I never used" and "old family items". Eventually using tips like in this video I let most of that go. The hardest thing now is ornamental items I still like, but just dont have space for. There is only so much wall space to put up all the pictures I love. I have ornaments that never go out because I dont put up a Christmas tree anymore. I have more jewelry than I could wear in a year, but every time I pick up something with a thought to donate it, its so pretty and I just cant do it most of the time. The struggle continues.
You won't get your money back leaving unused things in the wardrobe or around the home. You're remembering when you bought them that's all. Let someone else have them and use them. Charity shops are so good.
My daughter told me she use square plates, and don't want thing that requires polishing ( no sterling silver items of any kind).. She told me if the item can't go in dishwasher because it is too delicate then she definitely don't want it. Hearing those words from her mouth to my ears really hurt my feelings. I had been given these traditional items from my mom who were gifted them from her mother through tradition. So you are correct our kids don't want the old stuff as part of our past traditions. So I had to LOL when you said our kids don't want our stuff. So I took all the things that she didn't want the the Goodwill Store. It appears that our kids ideas about family tradition is a lot different than ours. My daughter told me that she is living a minimalist lifestyle.
I found it easier to donate books to my local public library to sell in the annual book sale knowing that people would enjoy them and the money would benefit the library. I am a lifelong bookworm so there were many books and I felt great about donating them and gaining a lot of shelf space.
Letting go of books was hard until I admitted I did not want to read some of them and had no room for new books I DID want to read. Building a Little Free Library of my own was a big help in unhauling unloved books.
Our county library will only accept books that were published within the last 6 months. You'd be surprised how many books go into garbage bins from the library.
@@ArtemisWithTheSilverBow I regularly donate my books to our local animal shelter resale shop . When buying new , I often chat w/ other book lovers & tell them to visit the shop .
I downsized an entire book shelf- most were “ the classics” The librarian said Are you sure??? I said if I ever want to read one again, I’ll come back here and borrow it!
Very sensible advice, thank you!❤- I have collected clothes for over 40 years. Items I love, even if I haven't worn them in years, sometimes turn out to be just the right ones for an occasion. So if I have the closet space I will keep them. This is also much cheaper & environmentally better than buying something new. 😊
yes I agree, I do this as well. And now, I am cutting up old jeans that I have grown out of, and making a beach blanket...... I want to repurpose things, and stay busy as I age.....its much cheaper to be thoughtful instead of being wasteful....
Great video. You have a real sweet demeanor about yourself. I'm in the process of starting decluttering. It's overwhelming some days and refreshing others.
I’m 73 now, retired almost 4 years. I’ve been working on declutterring. But those sentimental things are a sticking point for me. This video helps me tremendously! I’ve taken notes!! My husband has been a stumbling block too. He can’t let go of Anything. But - I realize I can declutter my things and other things that are not his, per se. I’m going to move further ahead in this after listening to you in this video. THANK YOU!!!! I’m Subscribed now too! 😊😊😊😊❤❤
Thank you for sharing your experience, strength and hope. I learned, with respect to pricey items I had purchased, that every time I looked at it I was reminded of What a mistake and waste of money. I do not want to see old lessons every day, and maybe they are somewhere someone else actually enjoys them. Sentimental items: I took photos. I can still see them and enjoy them with them taking up precious and valuable space in my home......
Good advice have been through decluttering in the past when i cleared my mothers house when she died in the past and when my children went away from our home ..it is hard
I may keep some pieces of jewelry for my kids, but maybe not. I have had a library of 2000 names, which is about 5,000 books. I donated almost all of them to libraries, Goodwill, etc. Yes, books were my weak spot. It took me 20 years to convince myself to separate myself from them. The rest is easier. I am not attached to nick-nacks. I will get rid of them. It was hard for me to donate the tones of my Mother's sheets, but some of them my daughter took, and some I donated. Still, it is so many things that must go - I have no use for them anymore at this stage of my life. Box by box - I am giving "into good hands" and feel good to see the empty space. it is a freedom.
It IS a freedom to get rid of stuff. Good for you! I like donating or selling online and it always feels good that someone else will give them new life.
Great advice! For me, my decluttering sticking point is definitely sentimental items that have been passed down to me for generations. I value these items a great deal and I worry that the items won't remain in the family, which I believe, wholeheartedly, is where they belong. 😢 I so need to work on this aspect of decluttering. I'm trying to come to terms with this reality.
I am so pleased I found myself here today ❤ I lost my partner just over 3 months ago. It took me a whole day going through tones of videos which previously belonged to his brother. He couldn't part with them. I had no option but to bin them they were of no use to anyone. It took me over 5 weeks to go through his things which caused a lot of heartache. I donated lots of things to the British heart foundation also to our local hospital league of friends, they raise money for different departments. This gave me great joy to know we were giving something back. I will never be able the thank the first response paramedics enough, thank God for these people who take on such a very difficult job. God bless everyone out there who help others through this sometimes very difficult life. May you and yours all find love, joy, peace and happiness 💚💚
You don’t know how badly I needed this today!!! I must clear out my storage unit and am not looking forward doing it because of all the memories!!! I have just said goodbye to it al!!! Thank you thank you thank you!!! God bless you🌺😘🇿🇦
WOW! some great points - I am a creative person - I try out so many projects - left over parts are stalling me as getting rid of something - I fear I may need it again.
Saving past memories or even replacement of acquisition with pictures has been so much better for me & the items don't rot like even the best old antiques do. :)
I need someone to be with me when I declutter. I'm neurodivergent, and a "body double" helps me. You can set ground rules about what kind of comments they make as you make your choices. Know yourself. Give yourself time to grieve the changes. Sometimes there's a genuine sense of loss. Figure out what it is and honor it. (Are you quietly confronting your own mortality? Downsizing because of a change in financial circumstances you didn't choose? Does your children's lack of interest in your things feel like a personal rejection? Etc. The attachment to stuff can be complex!) Thank you for your quiet wisdom from your own journey and insight into the blindness of familiarity with our things....
I find letting go of fabric is the hardest. I used to quilt and I said for years I need this fabric for when I retire to give me something to do cause I might want to make some new quilts. Turns out I am into card making and I hope to still make quilts when I get tired of making cards. I think I need to sell my hutch full of vintage needle art kits then I would have room for my fabric. Thank you for helping me figure this all out. I am going to get a small storage unit for the rest of my very expensive hobbies and camping equipment so we don’t have a cluttered garage. Which I want to turn into a clean room. 😊
I just started to declutter my stuff as I am getting divorced & moving across the country. I love everything you have said, I agree I didn’t want all my mom’s stuff when she passed-I donated her clothes to a senior center & 1 thrift store. Her car to a single mom who didn’t have a car. The rest to various people & organizations that could help others. Every year I would do a purge over thanksgiving week but this last 2 years I haven’t. After dealing with my mom’s place I had the urge to clean/declutter my house. Now it’s finally Go time. I appreciate your help, gave me a great reminder that it’s okay to let go of things I bought & never used. 👏👏👏👏👏 Yes it hurts but it’s ok, release & move on. ❤❤ thank you so much.
I love decluttering! Ive had plenty of practice and its like hitting the reset button for me. My husband on the other habd keeps everything in fear of needing it some day. The thought of having to rebuy an item he got rid of seens to paralyze him. I get so frustrated with the amount of stuff he holds on to that he does not use
I really appreciate that this was simple, practical, and to the point. Instead of dragging on foreverrrr. All really good tips! Thank you so much. I don't want my children to be burdened with getting rid of 10 million (exaggerating here), things when I'm gone.🙏🏾
While I can appreciate the point of paring down a bit, becoming organized and for the ease of upkeep, I must say I love my stuff. It’s a warm, cozy collage that is really quite charming. I don’t like the minimalist look. So many interiors remind me of dental office waiting rooms. New homes being built look like fire stations. I love rich, warm & cozy rooms. As I get older, I’ll pare down further to spare my kids the hassle. But not til then, am going to enjoy my collage.
Same here. I like my home to be colorful, warm and cosy. It should reflect my personality. So my rooms have lot of my art and craft things. My paintings, plants and cut flowers in vases. A home should have cosy, warm and chearfull feel. It should not be like a doctor's room.
I’ve found what gives extra motivation and strength to get rid of my things is to give clothes to my coworkers! They are Happy to have something new to them and I still get to see it!!!
Don't buy bins and organizational tools first. This hit me. I have so much of this stuff all over, adding to my clutter. Ugh. Thanks for the video. I needed to watch this.
Things you keep tucked away/in a box/storage room/Sentimental things- take a photo and keep them all grouped together in a file like “sentimental”. Still triggers all the lovely memories.
Sentimental items that have been in the family for years is hard to let go, however, my kids don't want the stuff!!! I'm 70 now and started a major decluttering journey!! It's surprising that once you start selling things on FB Marketplace.. how easy it becomes to just say goodbye to them! I haven't missed them! Also donating items I can't or don't use anymore is freeing!! A good feeling!! Thank you!!
My expensive purses, shoes and clothes. 😩 But I discovered that it might may someone like a refugee who was forced to leave their home and most likely had a great life before, can really appreciate it. And use it. Thank you for your tips 😊
I’ve just gotten through tossing 27 years of papers and files, and feel good about that. The only thing valuable to me were recipes and photos mixed in them. Now I will tackle sorting ALL of my clothes this winter, I have so much of them, good quality, but will never fit again. Shoes and old items go out almost weekly now too. I feel good disposing of an extra garbage bag weekly 🤗 The hardest for me will be leaving my lovely garden and huge trees , not replaceable items. We will look for a treed are to live in a smaller home.
I had lots of glasses, cups, saucers from my grandmother in Italy that I moved around for 50 years. Kids all said they didn’t want it. Finally I decided take it now or never! I took pictures of it all, emailed them to my kids and older grands. No one took a set but each took some of everything. I got rid of a lot! What little was leftover I donated and did not feel any guilt whatsoever.
I found this video to be a very sensible approach to decluttering. Jenny is articulate, keeps things moving, and provides tips and ideas, so I recommend you watch the whole thing, although I'm time-stamping it to use as a guide. Sometimes, I like to go back and watch certain parts of a video again, so time-stamping it makes this easier. 0:42 - Your Kids Don’t Want Your Stuff 2:08 - Sentimental Items are the Hardest 3:32 - Decluttering is Not a Race 4:34 - It’s Okay to Make Mistakes 6:03 - Don’t Let Guilt Dictate Your Decisions 7:17 - Selling Can Be Surprisingly Rewarding 7:59 - Don’t Buy Organizational Tools First 8:52 - Your Home Will Feel Bigger 9:40 - Memories Aren’t in the Things 10:28 - Decluttering can Bring Joy to Others
New subscriber, thank you so much! It's true we hang on to things way too long and actually hinder our own freedom within our house. Thanks for the advice😊
Most of my clothes are "iconic" designer items. I told myself they were an investment, I could always sell them in the future. Now I have to put the time and energy to take photos, write a description, post them on the internet, pack them, mail them. I decided from now on to buy regular stuff that I can just give to Goodwill later. A tip: I say to myself: "I'm only going to do this for 5 minutes, then I can stop". Most of the time I continue way after those 5 minutes.
It can be hard to get started. Sometimes I commit to 10 minutes here and there or an hour per week broken into whatever chunks of time are most convenient. I typically end up doing more. If you have a women's shelter in your community those designer clothes can help someone get back on her feet.
I really loved your video and advice. Right to the point. I just lost my husband this year after almost 40 years of marriage. No children. It's been a journey to try and decluttering for me. I can't seem to part with my grandmother's fancy clear tea glasses, antique. So I guess I will sell. I hope in this new year, I will be able to concentrate on selling a lot of his collections of Nascar items, Harley Davidson items. I could use the cash. I have cleaned out a closet and need to do more. Last year before he passed, I cleaned out all our Christmas stuff and donated to a local charity store that helps others. I have almost finished cleaning out his building where I store the huge mower. Sold some items too. 😢 I started a keepsake box of his stuff I can't part with. Small personal stuff. I'm 66 and wanting to simplify my life now and declutter.❤😊
Thank you so much. What is hard, is not having friends/family to help me with the task. It's the mental and visual clutter when I'm already in a smaller place and I cannot see through it... I do appreciate your advice and will work on those. Thanks again.
I've made Photobooks of all our family pictures, one copy for each child and grandchild. But I still have the original albums and negatives, all in a labelled bin. Plus memory boxes from my parents and grandmothers. Maybe I can toss them but these boxes are still important to me. It will be easy for my children to decide what to do with them when I'm gone. Everything is organized and labelled and they can decide what to keep or throw out - no sorting required. Your video and all the comments here are very encouraging. Thank you everyone.
❤ continuing to declutter & yes it does feel good & some fond memories along the way…. We have a lg yard sale at our church 2 times a year & all the proceeds go to missions outside the church & we make over 30+ thousands each time! I start right away after each sale saving for the next yard sale! Another thing I started a few years ago was when I buy a new item to wear, I give away 2 things in my closet…. It was my first start at decluttering! The family pictures are the hard ones for me….❤ TY❤️
It’s hard to believe that I’ll be able to avoid regret for letting go of craft collections, heirloom dishes, baking supplies, teaching aids. In other words, I still want to be recognized for ‘the creative and good things’ I’ve accomplished. Wow! What a revelation. And hanging on to wishing someone would notice is preventing me from creating my next projects and successes. Wow! Thanks for asking the question. More to meditate upon.
We put off remodeling our bathroom because some of our kids said, “no, you can’t change our bathroom!” Now that have remodeled they tell us how much better it is.
I love the tip on a timer set for ten minutes. I will do this. It is manageable. The idea that kids don't want your stuff, is mostly true. However, when you are the kid, and times are tight.... if you can be gifted a pretty lamp, or a like new dehydrator.... these things are very much appreciated. I suggest that you have frank discussions with your kids on anything you have in your donation box That you suspect they may want. That is just my perspective and it is current. My Mom is donating trunkfuls every few weeks right now.
I think we’ve all heard that, “Your kids don’t want your stuff.” Here is another side of it: “Kids! Your parents don’t want your stuff. Come and get it!“
So true! 🤣
😂😂
So true…I have a huge farm house full of stuff from 6 adult children! Oh, and my stuff tooooo. When I visit my adult children now I bring a small yet full box of their stuff with me. There kids get excited! Sofar it is working yet very slowly, and I am in no hurry….yet!
Amen, Sister! I have oodles of things in my upstairs closets and bedrooms that my kids "want " but don't want to take to their homes. Then they "fuss" at me about my clutter🙄
@@peggyboquist495ooh, that's cunning! Go, you!
1. Your kids do not want your stuff.
2. Sentimental items are the hardest.
3. De-cluttering is not a race.
4. It's okay to make mistakes.
5. Don't let guilt dictate your decisions.
6. Selling can be surprisingly rewarding.
7. Don't buy organizational tools first.
8. Your home is going to feel bigger.
9. Memories are not in the things.
10. De-cluttering can bring joy others.
Thank you!!! ❤
My kids actually wanted my stuff. I gathered everything up and told them to take whatever they want. They took about 90% , what was left i donated
My kids want stuff.
I want my mom's stuff.
11. The less stuff you have the more mentally healthy you will be.
I think the hardest part about decluttering in my home is that I’m the only one who wants to do it and there are 5 other people in the house contributing to the clutter. I think I’ll just start doing it on my own and hope I inspire the others to follow me. 😊
I hope it works out for you. I’ve been the only one on my household that declutters.
Once I started and purged a LOT around the home, my kids and husband saw the difference and how much better it was for our mental health and they soon followed on their own and tackled their stuff/rooms as well.
I'm 56. Been a lifelong concert goer, my fav band is Fleetwood Mac and Stevie Nicks, and have collected a large collection of music memorabilia. Knowing when it's my time I know my family would just have thrown all of it in a dumpster so I sold most of it on ebay. I have enjoyed having this stuff for decades but it's been stored in bins for decades. It's time for others to enjoy this stuff now. Hopefully my stuff will live a long long life bringing joy.
It is so much easier to declutter when I can give items to people that have need of them and also are appreciative!
🎯
Me too!
So true. Thats works for me too.❤❤
Where do you find them?
@@nancymoffatt4727 I ask people from church and other friends who are far more social than me.
My kids actually wanted a lot of my stuff. When I decluttered, I gathered up tons of stuff and told them to come get whatever they wanted before I sold it or gave it away.
They took about 90 %😊
My siblings and I all have lots of things from my parents, and there have been fights over some items. Most of it is from other countries, and made of actual wood.
Yeah, just ask if others want it and be fine with any answer. We give most of ours kids clothes and toys away when they grow out of it (if they are okay with it) and many friends are happy about it.
❤A great idea 🍀
I liked taking my grandma’s stuff when she died and my mom’s stuff when she died. It wasn’t much, and the things I got were practical and usable, but I was very grateful for the stuff I got ❤
My solution to decluttering is i have stopped purchasing new items many many years ago. I am 56. I just kept on using what i have. Some articles i also donated. Gradually the stuff around the house decreased. Now i have only essential items in my drawers and my single almirah. Most of the corners in my home have indoor plants or cut flowers in vases. I am very fond of flowers and gardening. The house is peacefull, clean and has positive energy around it. Also since i stopped purchasing new things i was able to save money for rainy day. Even small amounts of money saved on regular basis turn into large sums over the years. This gives peace of mind as one is prepared for any emergency.
Yes. This is my news years resolution. Stop accumulating new things, especially when not throwing unwanted things out.
I had to look up almirah, that’s one I’ve never heard before. Good job on not buying new things.
Me too I just stopped buying. I used up all the things I had and that decluttered eventually. So simple, and you don’t have to give away things you have and have loved.
I have downsized, it’s so hard bc everything has a memory attached. You’re right about what your kids want, nothing. I saved school stuff from my son and have pitched a lot. He had a long hair “tail”and when we cut it I saved it. When I tried to give it to him, he thought it was disgusting!
I get overwhelmed and have to walk away! Ty for your guidance.
Everything! My husband died 5 years ago. I had to breakup housekeeping in two homes. One a beautiful, large Georgian Colonial, and one a mountain home we had just loved, both were furnished with antiques, inherited treasures, and a lifetime of collecting “the perfect fit”. Frankly, they both were magazine worthy…I was able to give, sell, and donate much, but time constraints meant I had to put the rest in storage. Now, I have to dispense with the treasured core that is left, as my new “life”, sadly, will not accommodate them. I know the ropes with 5 adult children who loved the homes of their childhood, but cannot squeeze more items into their’s now. My mother had to do this 50 years ago, and her adult children (6 of us) suffered saying good bye, as much as she did. There is an “identity” in these treasures. Smaller may be necessary, but not better.😢. So, with heart in hand, I will begin anew in 2025, and let go the past into a future, that by no means is what I envisioned when building my homes piece by piece for 50+ years. Holding my nose, I dive into the familiar deep end.
@@hanselpollack4075 💖
Write a book
I asked my (adult) son what he will do with my collection of about 5000 printed photos, when I'm "gone". He said, he would digitize them. So I bought a scanner and scanned all of them in high resolution, sorted them into folders and uploaded them on google drive where I and my family can access them anytime. Also, they can be printed again anytime if necessary. Best decision ever! :-)
Can you recommend a scanner?
Yes, please - can you recommend a scanner?
@@lizshopes8146 Canon CanoScan LiDE400 Document Scanner
@@SqFtGardenGranny Canon CanoScan LiDE400 Document Scanner
Keep the prints too
I was a seamstress & furniture upholsterer for many years of my life. I loved making things, & taking some old, ugly things, & making them look brand new & beautiful. I collected beat up old furniture and took it all apart, refinished the wood, repaired it, if that was required _ reupholstering it. Then I'd sell it, & I'd earn very good money for all the work I did. I loved doing the work. However now I'm not physically able to continue doing all the work I had done for many years. The most difficult decision I have to make is to give away the sewing machines and most of the tools etc, that I have had for so many years. It's difficult to part with them. After watching your video, now I realize how much I must let go of 70%of all the things I still have. There must be some one in this world who would love to have the things I no longer need to have. And when I am finished donating it all to salvation army or Good Will I will have room to have a comfortable place to live with my precious kitty.😊
@Martibee4140. I absolutely feel your pain as my mother used to do that years ago. Please try to search out someone who would be interested in learning how to upholster furniture. Perhaps look for someone whose just wanting to get started in this field but doesn't have any equipment. Strike up a conversation you may be surprised who might be interested. Then when you feel comfortable gift them with your gear if they'd be interested. I think you would feel better doing that. We made many trips to private charities and Goodwill after my mother and mother-in-law no longer needed their things. What we found out was the charities did pick up items but not all. But Goodwill was the most annoying. As we dropped off items they would turn their noses up or flat out refuse to take. Or their eyes would light up and that item was shoved to the side. We felt it was going be placed in a friend of a friend's home or either sold for some side business side hustle scam. And that was as you were dropping items off. Please see if you can be the person that starts someone's dream off by supplying them your machines and expertise. If they have to go... might as well go to someone whose interested in your life's work. Just a thought
@@martibee4140 those sewing machines are highly sought after now. I make handbags that I gift and donate to charity auctions. That hobby brings me a lot of joy.
I also was a sewer. I never liked to get rid of the remnants. I found out that my local homeless shelter took remnants! Volunteers would make quilts and other items for those in need.
Your items may be extremely useful at such a place. You may also consider giving courses (with a helper to do the harder work) to others so you can pass on your hard earned skills.
Great that you could sell and make pretty good money, and I'm sure will continue to be rewarding when you donate. I paint and have a lot of paintings that no one wants, or at least don't want to buy. People say paint for yourself, true, but it's more stuff in the long run. Maybe I'll try digital art, but it doesn't excite me. 😞 As the other commenter said share your knowledge somehow, I think we both have a gift that we should pass on somehow.
I am currently going through my scrapbook stuff. Punches, papers, embellishments, etc. I’m selling what I can for pennies on the dollar. I know the people buying it are extremely happy to get these items for a fraction of the cost. That makes me happy. It helps me forget that I’m selling because my arthritic hands can’t use these things anymore (I am only 63). When you spoke about the challenges of getting started on a declutter. I had to work through that when my dad passed away. I stood in his basement workshop. He had 50+ years of stuff. We called it Neverland, because if it went down there, it never came back out. I remember being so overwhelmed. It was dusty and dark and full to the brim with things. I stood there crying, basically paralyzed by not knowing where to start. Then I told myself pick a shelf. That is exactly what I did. When that shelf was clear, I moved on to another. It took a month of weekends, but I got it cleared. I promised myself that I would never do that to my children, and I won’t.
The weird thing about getting rid of something that you have some attachment to (whether rational or emotional), is the minute it’s gone it’s a relief.
Yes, exactly how I felt! Such a burden off my shoulders
Nope.
That's how I feel, too. I have not missed one thing that I've gotten rid of. Not one. But every day I appreciate the tidier, uncluttered spaces in our house that we created by getting rid of those items.
For some.
100% true
I find it easier to take everything out of the closet.... vacuum & clean the empty closet..... then I put back clothes that I want to keep (organizing them by item & colors) and then I can see what I have, that fits, that I like, etc. You see how nice your closet looks..... and then the items that are left over, or don't fit, don't bring you joy....... donate, sell, or throwaway.
I love this!
My mother suddenly passed away 6 months ago at age 89. I took care of her for her last 14 years. My 4 brothers and 2 sisters don’t want her things and I find myself feeling I don’t want to dishonor her by just getting rid of her things. Her pride and joy was her wardrobe as she was a great dresser with her conservative and preppy taste, always wearing matching items. I have my own clothes and my own huge wardrobe so I also, with all due respect to my mamá, don’t want her clothes. I have a niece, one of her granddaughters, who did want a batch of her clothes and happily took some. It turns out the waitresses at a restaurant she frequented almost daily, want her clothes. I’m doing this in phases as I already placed a batch of her clothes in a huge bag, and into the trunk of my car. BUT I haven’t been able to give the bag away yet as I get a little emotional, which I know I’m not ready to take THAT step yet. Fortunately, the patient waitresses understand what I’m going through. Plus I know they will love having her clothes. And this makes me feel as if mamá is helping others. 🙏🏼🌺❤️
same here everyone wanted money, not mom's lovely things
Good for you!! You have taken steps and that's what gets us to where we want to be. Plus, like Jennifer says in the video, you are making people happy.
@@JS-oq5go I agree. In my 20s, I would have wanted a lot of things from my mom's house because I was setting up my own place, with little money but, after being married and having children, I can only think of one thing I would have wanted--a round, gold-flowered frame mirror from 1939 that they had since their marriage but, even that, (a sister has it) I am fine without as I have my own mirrors already in place that I like a lot! ;-) I agree that the kids mainly want the $$$$.
My mother had beautiful clothes too. I held onto some of her nicer things for a while because of the smell and they were things that made her feel beautiful. The time came and I was ready to let them go. Like you not all at once. The perfect person came along and I know my mom would have loved for this person to have her things. You will know when it’s time.❤
That’s so sweet. Keep on being patient with yourself. It’ll come in its right time. ❤❤
It really helped when you said my kids don't want my stuff and you are so right.
My kids probably wouldn't want anything I had so I don't care I would give it to somebody that wanted it
Haha, one of my sons has just moved out and has taken loads of my stuff including a few things that I wanted to keep, but let go to him. He still wants a few things that I still do want to keep so he will have to wait until I peg it.😂
My daughter comes over and does what she calls, “shopping at the House of Mom.” Anything she wants, she can have. She loves my taste and my mad shopping skills at local thrift shops.
My daughter also shops my closet for extra blankets, candles I haven't burned yet sometimes cleaning supplies, lol. She makes less money so I don't mind most the stuff she takes I dont even miss. Same with my pantry
Clothes are hard for me. I have a closet full of clothes I don't wear. I figured if I don't buy anymore clothes, then when the ones I wear a lot get old and worn, I can replenish them with the ones in my closet.
I did do a clean out when I retired of all my work clothes. I gave them to my cousin because she had an office job. It's the rest of the dresses, skirts, and tops I have held on to. I think it's time to get rid of these things.
I have an old farmhouse in the country. When I retired and bought the property , I started a large vegetable gardening, began caning, raising chickens and hens and not really going out to fancy places. I wear jeans , sweaters and shirts all the time now.
I think this video put things in perspective for me. Thanks for the great advice. I'll start tomorrow.
I found out that I AM once again my super-skinny-sized clothing!
‘90’s styles now back.
3 weeks later, how has your clothing declutter been going?
Had a jolly laugh hearing about your “creepy clown” pass-along gift!
I remember those creepy sad clown paintings! My mom had one in the kitchen wall thst would stare at us when we ate. Hated it! Don't know what happened to it, haven't thought about that for decades!
When I downsized my home at retirement it was an eye opener with all the stuff I had accumulated over the 18 years in that house. As a newly divorced mother of two I had an emotional attachment to retail therapy. Upon putting my house up for sale I rented a bin and had literally purged a tonne of junk. Much of it came out of the crawl space which I had not looked at in years. All that money wasted on stuff. There it was staring back at me in a full large bin. My kids did get to furnish their homes with the sofas ,coffee tables and other large pieces of furniture I was no longer needing. The home I purchased is a small cabin by Georgian Bay in Ontario. Too small for the kids to move back home.... I still had to get rid of more stuff but it was much easier the second time. I hired a professional organiser this time. Best money I ever spent. I still have clothing to tackle and small things that have made its way into my office space. And old papers that are no longer relevant. It's a process for sure but I am far more intentional with my purchases now. Plus a tight budget dictates what not to buy.
I can relate to the emotional attachment to retail therapy! So glad you were able to downsize your life and find joy in a simpler way of living.
Taking a picture of items that evoke fond memories is a brilliant idea. I have a lot of antique glassware and serving dishes I inherited from grandma and other relatives and used to put out on the table at Thanksgiving. Haven’t done so in about 30 years and they’re being stored in a cabinet. I’m 72. It’s time to get rid of them but who can? Pictures can help.
I'm your age, also, and am selling things on Marketplace. I had a beautiful punch bowl, embossed, with all of the accoutrements to go with it but felt so good when someone bought it and was so happy to have it!
@@pjmurphy920❤❤
This works if you back up the photos. I had photos of my mom's apartment and all her cute things just after she passed away. Then my house was broken into and my laptop was taken. There went the photos
@@lesliek4954 Yes. Get at least one good external hard drive to put the photos on. Don't trust your laptop or computer.
@@lesliek4954 even sadder is a woman who recently had her house broken into and many things were stolen. She has appealed online for the return of only 1 thing: a small silver box with her young son's ashes in them.
She must be devastated 😔
Going through it now, not just with my own stuff ( plenty of that) but also my mother's stuff. She grew up during the depression and was afraid to part with anything. She had downsized several times already but still hung on to the box of dried-out acrylic paint from the 60's. Absolutely no good to anyone. I tossed it with no guilt at all. She had a stack of maybe 100 paper bookmarks, most of them free in charity donation requests. She kept every free greeting card that came in the mail - two large cartons of those. Many shoeboxes full of recipes clipped from magazines.
It's easier to declutter someone else's stuff. I try to look at my own stuff objectively like that. Two years into this project, and a long way to go. Your suggestions are very helpful.
I'm glad I could be helpful. Thank you
My dad helped me declutter, when I was in recovery. Mom had spent years sending me stuff I never wanted & didn't have any sentimental meaning for me. Guilt kept me from getting rid of this stuff she'd paid to ship to me. We boxed them up & he delivered them back to her. Lol they're probably stored in that box still waiting to be tossed out, after she passes. My brother & I already know that dumpster rental is not cheap.
Books are the hardest thing to let go
For you maybe, not me
Then dont
Books are hard to discard but not really a problem for me. They sit on my shelves and I don't feel guilty looking at them. I just try to keep the quantity such that they can all be on the shelves vertically with no double-stacking, storage boxes, piles on the floor, or other nonsense. When I start having to park books horizontally on top of other books, it's time to read faster or let some go. Loose paper is my personal bugbear.
When I moved I got rid of a number of books that smelled a little mildewed. Now I regret it.
Books - letting go of books was hard until I admitted I did not want to read some of them and had no room for new books I DID want to read. Building a Little Free Library of my own was a big help in unhauling unloved books.
I recently decluttered a sentimental item. I just took a picture of it. I realized that when Im gone, it wasnt going to mean anything to someone else.
The hardest things for me to let go of are my parents’ and my dogs’ things. They’ve passed away, so their things ignite the memories. Yes, memories are stored in our hearts, but the material things trigger those memories. I am afraid of forgetting so much. Maybe I will try taking photos.
Taking photos is a great idea. You can keep those photos and remember those moments when you look through the photos. Maybe you can even add some in a journal and add memories next to the photos.
I know what you mean. Sometimes after I sketch things in my journal, even though I am no artist, I feel I have had the necessary time, and the memory comes back just as rich with a sketch and a few thoughts written down.
My kids already labeled items that they want. Artwork on walls, knick knack on a shelf, books on bookshelf, whatever the item may be they have a name tag on the items on back or bottom. If tag isn't functional we also have pictorial record of everything that is wanted. Each kid has a copy along with our attorney. Everything that isn't claimed can be auctioned, sold or donated. This is all reviewed yearly with the kids. Some things are added some things are removed and now the older grandkids are laying their claim to items they want passed on to them. Our kids also started doing the same with their kids as part of their estate planning
Sentimental items from my son when he was growing up and from deceased loved ones. 😮
That is very tough, but those are our memories not our childrens’…
The entire emotion of decluttering. My husband and I’ve been married for 42 years and we have accumulated a lot of stuff, even though we have moved all over the country. The idea that nobody wants my stuff, the things that I have loved and taken care of and used for all those years Probably just to go to the dump. My daughter is zero sentimental. She is a minimalist to the core and wants nothing. I’m just trying to come to grips with all of this as I start decluttering my home. Since November 1, we’ve gotten rid of almost 750 items. Which sounds wonderful, except unfortunately you can’t even tell. 😢 we have decided to do a little more the rest of this month and then in 2025 we are taking one or two rooms a month and doing a deep clean and decluttering. I’m hoping by this time next year we will be living in a clean peaceful decluttered house. 🎉
You may not think it is noticeable, but 750 is A LOT less you have to do later!
I 🙏🏽 that you can focus on one high-impact area to encourage you every day.
When we had to sell my parents house because my mom wanted to go to a retirement community to live, I started with one room at a time. When it got to things that maybe family wanted I put the items on her dining table called everyone over (they came at different times) and told them to take what ever they wanted. It made my mom so happy to see what they wanted to take and she told them the story behind it. So she got to see her stuff taken by family and they learned where it came from, how old it was and who they got it from. If your parent is ok with decluttering that way it can be very fun for them. The rest of the items were sold in a garage sale and what wasn't sold went to charity. And mom took what was her favorite things to her new apartment and she has been happy living there now for almost 3 years.
I love this story. Thank you for sharing.
When my parents retired & moved , they downsized ; after my father passed , mother moved / downsized again . Each time , my brother & I were given " first choice " & then mother offered things to other family members & close friends . Also some things were eventually sold & some donated . It was a gradual process , w/ tho't , caring & sharing . 🥰
These were great tips. I’m 3 weeks in with “Swedish Death Cleaning” and at the age of 53, my home has never felt more calm and relaxed. I wish I could have done this years ago. I’m letting go of all the things I thought people weren’t “allowed” to get rid of….old glass Christmas ornaments from my childhood, high school yearbooks, my great grandmother’s china set. I haven’t felt the slightest bit of discomfort in parting with any of it. My issue is with my grandmother’s collection of cut glass. I want to get rid of it, but I just don’t know how to go about selling it. It’s a huge collection and hasn’t been out of storage for 20 years. I’m definitely not attached to it, but I’d like to see it go to a collector who will love it and cherish it the way she did. I’ll figure it out eventually. In the meantime, I’m enjoying all of my newfound space and the way life is just easier without all of this stuff.
Amazing. I’ve been researching Swedish Death Cleaning and really want to try it. There is so much stuff we hold on to because we ‘should’. Good luck with your grandmother’s cut glass. I hope it finds a good home.
I've lost everything I own three times. I wish I had my yearbooks. But I'm also not mad about it anymore. Life goes on. I have my sports equipment and my kitchen.
@ I’m so sorry. I can’t begin to imagine how hard it is to lose everything all at once with no say in letting things go. It’s really not letting things go; it’s having things taken. My heart goes out to you. Maybe your high school has a facebook group that you could ask around to see if anyone is parting with their yearbook(s)? High school wasn’t a good time in my life, and having them on my shelf was just a reminder of unhappy times, so it was easy for me to toss them. I do hope you are able to track down a set for yourself.
@ one other idea is to try thrift stores in your hometown, if you’re still near there. I’ve actually seen some yearbooks at thrift stores and even on eBay. Best of luck to you.
@kawarthalakeside I've already done my death cleaning, honestly do it. It feels so much better in my home. I dont want to leave everything for my 3 children to do when I'm no longer here. They don't want all my stuff either. They have their own homes and contents.😊
Definitely sentimental items that are antique. My mom was a dealer and selected the most beautiful items for me.
However, it’s not my style. I’m 66 and over trying to get a living space to accommodate her things. Zap! Sold, donated or given away. Now I’m starting over and completely decorating for myself with what I love and want suits my personality.
As long as you don't throw them away, you are not disrespecting her good intentions.
@ Thank you! I agree.
I love that you are taking control of your home and making it suit your personality.
I agree with you a 100% ...
It's a real pity one has items in ones life one doesn't like but one sticks to for reasons of false loyalty ...
We need space to CREATE NEW MEMORIES !
Wow, that is what I'm going through right now. I've been redecorating my bedroom. I have a huge ugly armoire in the room that is my mother's. It's an absolute eye sore. She is so upset with me that I don't want it anymore.
Thank you for saying that! In my will, i have specified that all my furnishings & and other stuff go to those in genuine NEED. And, at 70 years old, i think twice & thrice before buying anything new. In fact, i've never felt more in touch with my mortality. I was walking around in a big box store the other day thinking, while everything was beautiful, my nest feathering days are behind me; i'm able to admire beautiful things without taking them home now. Books and flowers, are the only exception. Thank you for your video.
Great advice. My hardest items to declutter are clothes that are too small. There's always the hope that someday they'll fit.
I do that too. Some things are 10 years old or more. Seriously if we lose weight wouldn't it be more rewarding to get something new?
I do that too. I don’t like the new styles and afraid that I won’t find anything I like.
Opposite I have lost weight and I’m so sad to let go of my beautiful clothes! I find clothes easier to part with then sentimental items though.
@@Cindy-beeAnd by giving it away sooner, rather than later, there is a greater chance the clothes will be in style & others will want to wear them (not just go straight to landfill). 😢❤😊
if you spend some time in thrift stores and consignment shops you will realize how much beautiful clothing is available out there. i give generously to my local thrift stores because i have been rewarded many times over with absolutely amazing finds for a few dollars. if you do lose weight, reward yourself with the thrill of the hunt! saying this, i still have a tote of old pieces that i know i will likely never fit into, but one day might have a special young person to share them with!
I'm in my 60s and I lived in my parents' house all my life since my mother always said to me, why would you go take an apartment, there is plenty of place here for you. After she became sick and had to be placed in a home(25 years ago), my boyfriend (now my husband) came to stay with my father and I. He brought a lot of stuff that took years to declutter. For years, I tried to keep everything tucked away and neatly put in closets. But, then he started to buy a lot of CDs, DVDs then blu-rays, guitars, acoustic pedals etc. These are not garbage, but over time they simply started to be a bit overwhelming. I tried to limit them to our big family room downstairs and one spare room upstairs, but, it was still bother me. So, after my dad passed away, I started to give away all my parents' stuff. All the cristal (that I don't use or like), bed sheets (we had 40 sets for 3 people, my mother was obsessed with clean sheets), towel, dish towels, linens of all kind etc.... After 2 years of giving stuff away, many of them being sentimental, I feel much better and don't miss anything. I gave most of it to family members or friends who knew my parents and I know they were happy to get these items. But, I still have a lot of recorded tapes that my Dad use to record of him playing the guitar(I really seem to be attracting people who love guitars) and now the camera it was recorded on doesn't work and can't be repaired and it would cost too much to have it transferred without knowing if it was worth it. So I feel very guilty to let these go. But there are a lot. And since I already know that my husband will have trouble parting with his items, I have to make this sacrifice. But, since we don't have children, I know that those things will only interest me, so I have my memories in my heart and in the end, it's enough. Because looking at footage of people you loved that aren't there never feels very good to me. I have trouble even with pictures. I always feel depressed after looking at pictures of my mum and dad. But, watching channels like yours certainly help to realize that we are not alone in the same situation and it make the process much easier and keep our motivation going. Thank you for taking the time to do them and share your experience with us.
Thank you for honestly sharing your experiences. I am 73 and got overwhelmed with stuff that has taken decades to divest myself from; a lot of it being guilt for items I should love that don’t serve me now. I understand your comment about old photos being depressing. I’ve culled about 10 boxes of photos from two sets of grandparents, an aunt and uncle, my parents, and myself down to about three. I hope to get this down to at least one max, with a scrapbook of photos of my musician parents for my son. During a recent morbid conversation with a friend, we talked about people coming for us, and I said I want my dogs to come for me. She said don’t you want any people? I loved my parents but they were always at each other’s throat and no I don’t want anything more to do with them. Nor do I want my lying aunt or any of her relatives coming for me. My grandparents were lovely but that was a lifetime ago. I don’t want to go anywhere if my pets won’t be there anyway. I need to keep pushing stuff out the door and prepare. I’m not getting any younger and well I’m still able to I need to get rid of all this stuff and travel.
Regarding your videos that need to be converted. My local public library had some of that equipment. I think our library is exceptional with the amount of things available, but it is worth checking into. It is time consuming to do it yourself, but most of the time you can also multitask. Some equipment might be available to take home, but if your library has it, you might have to do it there. I digitized all the family movies and shared them (usb drives) with brother, sister, & their families.
@@SoundofSilence492 I realize as I'm addressing these downsizing tasks that I should have done it sooner in my 50s. The more you wait the more those objects have power over you. But, now that I have started, I feel my motivation growing each day and now it's like a challenge to let go of things and when I succeed I can feel the endorphines released by my body almost. It has a nice calming effect and it's so liberating. I just hope my husband will take example on me at some point and let go of some of his things too. I hope you reach your goal and be able to travel. Life is made to be enjoyed! :-)
@@donnaharris9270Unfortunately, my local library doesn't provide that service. But, when I think about it, I already archived some of it and I still have some on digital tapes that go in a camera that still works. So, it's not that dramatic if I lose some. Looking at this kind of thing depresses me more than it does me good. It's more the guilt of getting rid of those things that is difficult. But again, my memories are in my heart and not on tapes. What's on tapes is just a tiny, tiny part of them. And sharing these emotions here makes you realize it and that a very good thing! :-)
Never thought about my house breathing. I love my house and it DOES need to breathe. Thank you. 🙏🏼
Indeed, over insulating cuts the oxygen right out, besides your symbolic reference!
The sentimental things are priceless!!!!❤😢😢😢😢
Why live your life as though you were dead, and getting rid of stuff that OTHER people, internet people TELL you to do. Perhaps you can make your own decisions, and you aren't telling them what to do.
You are reacting to a very nice realtor, TELLING you on the Internet what to do! What’s the difference? You are being told, very clearly,, what to do, yet you think others making a decision that doesn’t fit with yours, or the presenter are living their lives ‘as though [they] were dead!’. Really? Where have YOU been? I don’t disagree with the presenter in many ways. But, I an experienced enough to know that history really does matter, and not just family connections to it. Where I live (U.K.), the antique business is alive and well, and often the biggest market place is in countries like the US, with limited history. I have witnessed small historic (even household) items being sold at a price you could by and apartment for in the US.
Correction: ‘buy’, not ‘’by’.
Sentimental items are priceless, BUT what are they costing you - if the price you are paying is stress, strained relationships, no room/time for daily living, future burden for loved ones, etc, THEN maybe your priceless treasures are costing you too much😢. ❤😊
Well said!@@wendylang2360
I have generations of things in my home. I have the most trouble getting rid of homemade items from my grandmother, mother and grown children.
Yes, but if those items don't make you feel good when you look at them or pick them up, that's my trigger to let them go. Someone else will love them, someone younger with many years left to enjoy them and you might get $$$ from them, if you want to. I like giving to the women's shelter here.
I relate. I have some antique doll furniture made by my great grandfather. I have ended up with it probably because no one else wants to be the one to let it go. I need to build my declutter muscle so this too can leave.
You don't need to throw them away if you want to keep them. They are in your house now so there is space for them.
About 35 years ago I bought a bunch of yarn for my great-aunt who was going blind, but could crochet a certain stitch by feeling it. I thought she could make herself a nice blanket. She gave ME the blanket back, and now I have guilt trying to get rid of it. I don’t use it. I really don’t want it. All I think of is how I wanted to do something nice for her, and she in turn wanted to do something nice for me. I feel like such a bad person. The guilt is too much.
@@KSt-nv8eb You did do a nice thing. She did a nice thing. Take a picture of it and give it to a thrift store. You are a good person who found a way to grow a relationship with your great-aunt! Keep that in your heart and your head. Give the blanket away!
Sentimental items are the hardest for me to let go.
This is one of the best, no nonsense, how to do it videos I have watched. Bravo!
Thank you for your feedback. I really appreciate it. Glad you enjoyed the video.
The best thing you can do for yourself and your kids is to clean up your life and streamline before you aren’t able to. When my mom passed she left a big suburban house full of stuff that had been accumulated over her lifetime. Attic, basement, garage. It was an incredibly difficult job to clean up, pack up and dispose of. I have to admit I resented her for putting that on us.
And don’t let your guilt over the money you’ve spent on the stuff keep you from getting rid of it. That money is already gone. Keeping the unused item isn’t bringing it back.
I am so glad I have no problem getting rid of stuff. I absolutely hate clutter. Always have a give away box. Charities appreciate so much your old stuff and unwanted gifts. They survive with these items.
I’d rather regret getting rid of something than having stuff pile up. Yes, I’m a neat freak and proud of it!!
I went through all my photos and mementos from my children and gave them to each one of them. They now have the opportunity of saving them or throwing away!
Thank you!! I am 51 with 10 children and many years ago. I was frustrated with the amount of clutter in my home. My dear father-in-law said “go easy on yourself. Remember, there’s a lot of people in your house so there’s a lot of stuff” He was right! I often watch hoarders so that I don’t feel so bad -believe me I am not a hoarder! it’s just hard for me to feel like my house is clean when I have extra clothes piled on the couch books on the floor instead of on the shelf, legos under foot and don’t get me started with the laundry room! But, because of special people like you, I have a really good start on having a cleaner home. I do teach my children to clean and that does help!! Do keep the videos coming, they really do inspire.❤
I love your father-in-law’s advice and you are right - a house full of love is bound to have some clutter too!
I bought my family home and 3 generations of stuff in the attic and cupboards. We moved in after my last parent died. It hadn't been empty for 30 yrs., from my 4 siblings and parents.
So I moved in with my family of 5 stuff. Everyone wanting to store but not take! Took me 8yrs then 2 more moves to get it paired down.
My kids on their own, bought "their" stuff at Walmart. Gave it away when they moved, and bought new Walmart. It's a new generation. Nothing is passed down thru generations, no family heirlooms today. Once it was finally gone, it was a breath of fresh air@
Walmart..... YUK
I agree, some years back I took pictures of various things I wanted to remember before I got rid of them - childhood toys, exam pieces/pictures I had done for my school art exams, that kind of physical thing which you just want to be able to see and remember occasionally. Incredibly stupidly, I did not back them up onto a small SD card, USB stick or similar. I also had lots of photos of several years of my son's younger days on the same computer, which completely died and all of the stuff on it was corrupted and irretrievable. So, they are all lost forever, unfortunately. My top tip is, large capacity SD cards are very small and store a lot, so get those and back up your photos. Or, if you have a heck of a lot to do, you could buy a huge capacity spare USB drive, which still takes a lot less room than the physical objects. I still don't trust uploading anything too personal to the cloud - call me a dinosaur - but it's a nice compromise, the SD cards take very very little space and hold a LOT of memories.
🤣 My daughter just came out of my closet with my black leather boots proclaiming them “fire” and asking if she could have them. Now, I’m looking for new boots and nothing fits and they don’t seem to make them out of leather anymore. Point is, you might be surprised what your kids do want!
Ask her if you can have them back when she's tired of them.
I just declutterred my rec room. The things I have most difficulty getting rid of are some antiques that belonged to our family or a family member that has passed that gifted me with an item. It’s true that my home feels more calm especially in that room that I can now enjoy more. Great advice as I have just gone through a lot of stuff. Some I kept and maybe in the next round it will go as well. It can be so hard for some things like a letter from my dad or a note from my mom, even old birthday cards. Mostly because I know that I will never get any more of them.
We took photos of those things and let the originals go. We still have the memory stored if we want to look at it…minus the clutter. 🙏
I have my mothers things she wrote and my grandmothers letters and hers ! My grandfathers ids and birth certificate from 1885 , from Asturias , Spain , etc… probably my children will not want them but I did ! I appreciate so much my mothers incredible work for education and her glorious humanism to others I can’t let those go ! I will donate her library to the University where she worked and made the new career Orientation in Dominican Republic . There is a library under her name . And 3 Schools ! Seeing this made me think I will donate all to the library of the University some day soon . She pass away at 100 years old !
What an amazing legacy!
Your message has me smiling. It’s all true. Thank you. ❤🎉
Insightful!!! I love "guilt vs burden".❤️❤️❤️
I have been decluttering for years and have had trouble with "expensive things I never used" and "old family items". Eventually using tips like in this video I let most of that go. The hardest thing now is ornamental items I still like, but just dont have space for. There is only so much wall space to put up all the pictures I love. I have ornaments that never go out because I dont put up a Christmas tree anymore. I have more jewelry than I could wear in a year, but every time I pick up something with a thought to donate it, its so pretty and I just cant do it most of the time. The struggle continues.
You won't get your money back leaving unused things in the wardrobe or around the home. You're remembering when you bought them that's all. Let someone else have them and use them. Charity shops are so good.
That’s ok. I’m the same way as you.
I’ve told my kids to take what they want and then get an estate seller to take care of the rest of the contents of the house!
Great idea!
My daughter told me she use square plates, and don't want thing that requires polishing ( no sterling silver items of any kind).. She told me if the item can't go in dishwasher because it is too delicate then she definitely don't want it. Hearing those words from her mouth to my ears really hurt my feelings. I had been given these traditional items from my mom who were gifted them from her mother through tradition. So you are correct our kids don't want the old stuff as part of our past traditions. So I had to LOL when you said our kids don't want our stuff. So I took all the things that she didn't want the the Goodwill Store. It appears that our kids ideas about family tradition is a lot different than ours. My daughter told me that she is living a minimalist lifestyle.
Minimalist👎
😢
I found it easier to donate books to my local public library to sell in the annual book sale knowing that people would enjoy them and the money would benefit the library. I am a lifelong bookworm so there were many books and I felt great about donating them and gaining a lot of shelf space.
Letting go of books was hard until I admitted I did not want to read some of them and had no room for new books I DID want to read. Building a Little Free Library of my own was a big help in unhauling unloved books.
Our county library will only accept books that were published within the last 6 months. You'd be surprised how many books go into garbage bins from the library.
@@ArtemisWithTheSilverBow I regularly donate my books to our local animal shelter resale shop . When buying new , I often chat w/ other book lovers & tell them to visit the shop .
I downsized an entire book shelf- most were “ the classics”
The librarian said Are you sure???
I said if I ever want to read one again, I’ll come back here and borrow it!
@@ArtemisWithTheSilverBow Many senior living complexes have reading rooms / libraries & appreciate donations . Also , adult / youth literacy programs .
I donate my stuff to give someone else joy. ..it brought me joy and now I pay it forward.
Very sensible advice, thank you!❤- I have collected clothes for over 40 years. Items I love, even if I haven't worn them in years, sometimes turn out to be just the right ones for an occasion. So if I have the closet space I will keep them. This is also much cheaper & environmentally better than buying something new. 😊
yes I agree, I do this as well. And now, I am cutting up old jeans that I have grown out of, and making a beach blanket...... I want to repurpose things, and stay busy as I age.....its much cheaper to be thoughtful instead of being wasteful....
If you've got the space that is awesome!
Great video. You have a real sweet demeanor about yourself. I'm in the process of starting decluttering. It's overwhelming some days and refreshing others.
I’m 73 now, retired almost 4 years. I’ve been working on declutterring. But those sentimental things are a sticking point for me. This video helps me tremendously! I’ve taken notes!! My husband has been a stumbling block too. He can’t let go of Anything. But - I realize I can declutter my things and other things that are not his, per se. I’m going to move further ahead in this after listening to you in this video. THANK YOU!!!! I’m Subscribed now too! 😊😊😊😊❤❤
I love that you’re focusing on what you can control, even with the challenges. Keep up the great work!
Thank you for sharing your experience, strength and hope. I learned, with respect to pricey items I had purchased, that every time I looked at it I was reminded of What a mistake and waste of money. I do not want to see old lessons every day, and maybe they are somewhere someone else actually enjoys them. Sentimental items: I took photos. I can still see them and enjoy them with them taking up precious and valuable space in my home......
Since my daughters moved out I feel very inspired to toss / sell/ donate. But it's a lot and you are right. Slow and steady.
Good advice have been through decluttering in the past when i cleared my mothers house when she died in the past and when my children went away from our home ..it is hard
Totally overwhelmed.
I may keep some pieces of jewelry for my kids, but maybe not. I have had a library of 2000 names, which is about 5,000 books. I donated almost all of them to libraries, Goodwill, etc. Yes, books were my weak spot. It took me 20 years to convince myself to separate myself from them. The rest is easier. I am not attached to nick-nacks. I will get rid of them. It was hard for me to donate the tones of my Mother's sheets, but some of them my daughter took, and some I donated. Still, it is so many things that must go - I have no use for them anymore at this stage of my life. Box by box - I am giving "into good hands" and feel good to see the empty space. it is a freedom.
It IS a freedom to get rid of stuff. Good for you! I like donating or selling online and it always feels good that someone else will give them new life.
Thank you. Great advice. Drawings that my girls made as children are probably the hardest to give away.
My sister had a large poster size picture of the late Richard Simmons, my cousin love it glad we passed it on.
Great advice! For me, my decluttering sticking point is definitely sentimental items that have been passed down to me for generations. I value these items a great deal and I worry that the items won't remain in the family, which I believe, wholeheartedly, is where they belong. 😢 I so need to work on this aspect of decluttering. I'm trying to come to terms with this reality.
I am so pleased I found myself here today ❤ I lost my partner just over 3 months ago. It took me a whole day going through tones of videos which previously belonged to his brother. He couldn't part with them. I had no option but to bin them they were of no use to anyone. It took me over 5 weeks to go through his things which caused a lot of heartache. I donated lots of things to the British heart foundation also to our local hospital league of friends, they raise money for different departments. This gave me great joy to know we were giving something back. I will never be able the thank the first response paramedics enough, thank God for these people who take on such a very difficult job. God bless everyone out there who help others through this sometimes very difficult life. May you and yours all find love, joy, peace and happiness 💚💚
You don’t know how badly I needed this today!!! I must clear out my storage unit and am not looking forward doing it because of all the memories!!! I have just said goodbye to it al!!! Thank you thank you thank you!!! God bless you🌺😘🇿🇦
And you will save the rental cost on the unit!
WOW! some great points - I am a creative person - I try out so many projects - left over parts are stalling me as getting rid of something - I fear I may need it again.
Saving past memories or even replacement of acquisition with pictures has been so much better for me & the items don't rot like even the best old antiques do. :)
I need someone to be with me when I declutter. I'm neurodivergent, and a "body double" helps me. You can set ground rules about what kind of comments they make as you make your choices. Know yourself.
Give yourself time to grieve the changes. Sometimes there's a genuine sense of loss. Figure out what it is and honor it. (Are you quietly confronting your own mortality? Downsizing because of a change in financial circumstances you didn't choose? Does your children's lack of interest in your things feel like a personal rejection? Etc. The attachment to stuff can be complex!)
Thank you for your quiet wisdom from your own journey and insight into the blindness of familiarity with our things....
Wonderful insights, kcarver.
I find letting go of fabric is the hardest. I used to quilt and I said for years I need this fabric for when I retire to give me something to do cause I might want to make some new quilts. Turns out I am into card making and I hope to still make quilts when I get tired of making cards. I think I need to sell my hutch full of vintage needle art kits then I would have room for my fabric. Thank you for helping me figure this all out. I am going to get a small storage unit for the rest of my very expensive hobbies and camping equipment so we don’t have a cluttered garage. Which I want to turn into a clean room. 😊
It sounds like you have a wonderful plan!
I just started to declutter my stuff as I am getting divorced & moving across the country. I love everything you have said, I agree I didn’t want all my mom’s stuff when she passed-I donated her clothes to a senior center & 1 thrift store. Her car to a single mom who didn’t have a car. The rest to various people & organizations that could help others. Every year I would do a purge over thanksgiving week but this last 2 years I haven’t. After dealing with my mom’s place I had the urge to clean/declutter my house. Now it’s finally Go time. I appreciate your help, gave me a great reminder that it’s okay to let go of things I bought & never used. 👏👏👏👏👏 Yes it hurts but it’s ok, release & move on. ❤❤ thank you so much.
Love the idea of a “maybe” box !!!
This was the most forgiving and wonderful way to look at declutterring I have ever found! Thank you!!!
I love decluttering! Ive had plenty of practice and its like hitting the reset button for me. My husband on the other habd keeps everything in fear of needing it some day. The thought of having to rebuy an item he got rid of seens to paralyze him. I get so frustrated with the amount of stuff he holds on to that he does not use
My hubby is the same, he can't let go of anything, cardboard, empty boxes.... it is more stressful than decluttering!!
I really appreciate that this was simple, practical, and to the point. Instead of dragging on foreverrrr. All really good tips! Thank you so much. I don't want my children to be burdened with getting rid of 10 million (exaggerating here), things when I'm gone.🙏🏾
While I can appreciate the point of paring down a bit, becoming organized and for the ease of upkeep, I must say I love my stuff. It’s a warm, cozy collage that is really quite charming. I don’t like the minimalist look. So many interiors remind me of dental office waiting rooms. New homes being built look like fire stations. I love rich, warm & cozy rooms. As I get older, I’ll pare down further to spare my kids the hassle. But not til then, am going to enjoy my collage.
It sounds like you have a home that reflects your personality! There’s nothing wrong with creating a cozy space that you love.
A fire station!😂😂😂
Same here. I like my home to be colorful, warm and cosy. It should reflect my personality. So my rooms have lot of my art and craft things. My paintings, plants and cut flowers in vases. A home should have cosy, warm and chearfull feel. It should not be like a doctor's room.
I’ve found what gives extra motivation and strength to get rid of my things is to give clothes to my coworkers! They are Happy to have something new to them and I still get to see it!!!
Don't buy bins and organizational tools first. This hit me. I have so much of this stuff all over, adding to my clutter. Ugh. Thanks for the video. I needed to watch this.
Things you keep tucked away/in a box/storage room/Sentimental things- take a photo and keep them all grouped together in a file like “sentimental”. Still triggers all the lovely memories.
Thank you.
I am having trouble letting go of books that I haven't read yet or I don't need them right now but maybe in the future as reference books 😮
Same!!!
Sentimental items that have been in the family for years is hard to let go, however, my kids don't want the stuff!!! I'm 70 now and started a major decluttering journey!! It's surprising that once you start selling things on FB Marketplace.. how easy it becomes to just say goodbye to them! I haven't missed them! Also donating items I can't or don't use anymore is freeing!! A good feeling!! Thank you!!
Get a digital frame and load up the pics of the sentimental stuff. You can "display' the items and still let go of them.
Digital frames are a great idea!
Thank you your patience and kindness.
It not nice when people send criticism instead of a helping hand,
I’ve been starting by using up my hair and face products, will go from there…😏😉
My expensive purses, shoes and clothes. 😩
But I discovered that it might may someone like a refugee who was forced to leave their home and most likely had a great life before, can really appreciate it. And use it.
Thank you for your tips 😊
I love that you’re finding a new purpose for your belongings!
I’ve just gotten through tossing 27 years of papers and files, and feel good about that. The only thing valuable to me were recipes and photos mixed in them.
Now I will tackle sorting ALL of my clothes this winter, I have so much of them, good quality, but will never fit again. Shoes and old items go out almost weekly now too. I feel good disposing of an extra garbage bag weekly 🤗
The hardest for me will be leaving my lovely garden and huge trees , not replaceable items.
We will look for a treed are to live in a smaller home.
I had lots of glasses, cups, saucers from my grandmother in Italy that I moved around for 50 years. Kids all said they didn’t want it. Finally I decided take it now or never! I took pictures of it all, emailed them to my kids and older grands. No one took a set but each took some of everything. I got rid of a lot! What little was leftover I donated and did not feel any guilt whatsoever.
For start, I love love love your chair.
I found this video to be a very sensible approach to decluttering. Jenny is articulate, keeps things moving, and provides tips and ideas, so I recommend you watch the whole thing, although I'm time-stamping it to use as a guide. Sometimes, I like to go back and watch certain parts of a video again, so time-stamping it makes this easier.
0:42 - Your Kids Don’t Want Your Stuff
2:08 - Sentimental Items are the Hardest
3:32 - Decluttering is Not a Race
4:34 - It’s Okay to Make Mistakes
6:03 - Don’t Let Guilt Dictate Your Decisions
7:17 - Selling Can Be Surprisingly Rewarding
7:59 - Don’t Buy Organizational Tools First
8:52 - Your Home Will Feel Bigger
9:40 - Memories Aren’t in the Things
10:28 - Decluttering can Bring Joy to Others
Vases, decorative items, holiday decor, handbags, jewelry, dishes, books. . . .
New subscriber, thank you so much! It's true we hang on to things way too long and actually hinder our own freedom within our house. Thanks for the advice😊
Most of my clothes are "iconic" designer items. I told myself they were an investment, I could always sell them in the future. Now I have to put the time and energy to take photos, write a description, post them on the internet, pack them, mail them.
I decided from now on to buy regular stuff that I can just give to Goodwill later.
A tip: I say to myself: "I'm only going to do this for 5 minutes, then I can stop". Most of the time I continue way after those 5 minutes.
It can be hard to get started. Sometimes I commit to 10 minutes here and there or an hour per week broken into whatever chunks of time are most convenient. I typically end up doing more. If you have a women's shelter in your community those designer clothes can help someone get back on her feet.
I really loved your video and advice. Right to the point. I just lost my husband this year after almost 40 years of marriage. No children. It's been a journey to try and decluttering for me. I can't seem to part with my grandmother's fancy clear tea glasses, antique. So I guess I will sell. I hope in this new year, I will be able to concentrate on selling a lot of his collections of Nascar items, Harley Davidson items. I could use the cash. I have cleaned out a closet and need to do more. Last year before he passed, I cleaned out all our Christmas stuff and donated to a local charity store that helps others. I have almost finished cleaning out his building where I store the huge mower. Sold some items too. 😢 I started a keepsake box of his stuff I can't part with. Small personal stuff. I'm 66 and wanting to simplify my life now and declutter.❤😊
Thank you so much. What is hard, is not having friends/family to help me with the task. It's the mental and visual clutter when I'm already in a smaller place and I cannot see through it... I do appreciate your advice and will work on those. Thanks again.
I've made Photobooks of all our family pictures, one copy for each child and grandchild. But I still have the original albums and negatives, all in a labelled bin. Plus memory boxes from my parents and grandmothers. Maybe I can toss them but these boxes are still important to me. It will be easy for my children to decide what to do with them when I'm gone. Everything is organized and labelled and they can decide what to keep or throw out - no sorting required.
Your video and all the comments here are very encouraging. Thank you everyone.
I've always said I would have the World's tidiest home if I had never learned to read.
So, so true!!
🤣
That’s funny! I started reading books online and I love it. I had to have a local library card first and then go from them to the site they use.
I have a house with many books, which I think is better than the World's tidiest home and I am so glad I can read. ❤
@@debramccafferty2918that’s what I do. Given most away
❤ continuing to declutter & yes it does feel good & some fond memories along the way…. We have a lg yard sale at our church 2 times a year & all the proceeds go to missions outside the church & we make over 30+ thousands each time! I start right away after each sale saving for the next yard sale! Another thing I started a few years ago was when I buy a new item to wear, I give away 2 things in my closet…. It was my first start at decluttering! The family pictures are the hard ones for me….❤ TY❤️
Great video. You make so much sense. I’m gonna force my parents to watch this
It’s hard to believe that I’ll be able to avoid regret for letting go of craft collections, heirloom dishes, baking supplies, teaching aids. In other words, I still want to be recognized for ‘the creative and good things’ I’ve accomplished. Wow! What a revelation. And hanging on to wishing someone would notice is preventing me from creating my next projects and successes. Wow! Thanks for asking the question. More to meditate upon.
We put off remodeling our bathroom because some of our kids said, “no, you can’t change our bathroom!” Now that have remodeled they tell us how much better it is.
Isn't that always the way??? Change is hard.
I love the tip on a timer set for ten minutes. I will do this. It is manageable. The idea that kids don't want your stuff, is mostly true. However, when you are the kid, and times are tight.... if you can be gifted a pretty lamp, or a like new dehydrator.... these things are very much appreciated. I suggest that you have frank discussions with your kids on anything you have in your donation box
That you suspect they may want. That is just my perspective and it is current. My Mom is donating trunkfuls every few weeks right now.