My daughter got a tattoo because of the lyrics of one of your songs when she was in college.(She showed it to you in St. Louis HA) It turned out a bit bigger than she imagined. LOL I don't care. I'm her mom. And you helped her when I didn't know how. She broke up with her first love in college and I KNEW what she was going through. I knew all I could do was listen. I was so scared for her. She was so into the Dresden Dolls then. She emailed you. I have no idea what she said but, I'm sure it was expressing her love of your music and how it was allowing her to "survive". YOU responding to her and WHAT you SAID helped her get through it. What you said turned things around for her. As a mom, I can never repay you for that. You mothered her when I knew but, didn't know how to help. What ever you said in that email to her helped her take a different focus. THANK YOU. Update in 2014 at 25...she is an amazing woman that I look up to and LOVE so much..my daughter, my child...grew into a lovely young woman.
It is years later and I cried a bit at the end of the song, and then more from your story. Thank you. I'm watching this because I was on a Neil Gaiman video binge, and watched a video with him and Amanda Palmer (they seem to be beautifully in love), where she was describing writing this song -- I haven't listened to much of her music before. I was married for a while once, for several years, but we grew apart and he wouldn't do anything about his snoring and I slept in a different room because I needed my sleep for my career . . . then our politics went separate directions and he crashed his career and I left and I'm happier and he's probably still sad. Life is just one story after another, isn't it?
this song gets even sadder when you presence this lack of communication every day. Its like I am seeing my parents on the screen. It's also amazing, in a way, that humans can have the same problems under so different circumstances
I was taken to an Evelyn Evelyn show, and Amanda did some of her solo work afterwards. This song was one of them. I’d never heard it before, and let me tell you, it had that same effect of causing me to burst into tears right there in public that it still has after multiple listens. She just nailed that feeling of a young relationship that drifts apart over time even though all of the milestones we think we want are being achieved. She does it in a way everyone can relate to because, as someone else said, it’s “ordinary”, this slow death of what was once so special and intimate, but that doesn’t make it any less tragic.
As someone with extensive social anxiety, I really have to say that this song has helped open my eyes a little bit. I cry every single time I listen to it, but I feel like its message has helped me feel not so... Afraid of asking people, well, what was the matter. I always have to listen to it more than once.
This song came out shortly after my divorce and it so clearly described the death of our relationship...it was frightening...it was tragic...it was spot on. This is the song that allowed me to move past a lifetime of "men don't cry"...it allowed me to feel the pain that that I had shut away...it allowed me to cry unashamedly (eventually) and it still brings tears to my eyes whenever I hear it (sometimes even on purpose). As always, thank you, Amanda! I will forever continue to wear Slayer shirts to your shows...
I still can't sing along to this song without getting too choked up for any sound to come out. This is still one of the most heartbreaking songs I've ever heard.
This song is so clearly a fable, and one I will heed to heart for sure, but does anyone else just get filled to the brim with despair at just hearing a few chords from this song? I am obsessed with Amanda so I listed to this song til I knew it by heart but now I can't. It makes me deeply weep with sticky longing and loneliness.
This is the kind of song that reminds me to tell my wife and kids everyday that I love them, that they are so precious to me, and I cherish them. Now, go do it. Don't be afraid to be honest. And don't risk carrying regret.
your comment and this song makes me love hearing my dad (I'm 11) telling me that he loves me even though he picks on me. and it makes me appreciate that I hug my parents before bed every night. :")
I hope five years later you still feel the same. I am 38 now and I don't know what I am more afraid of - telling my father that I love him or regretting not having done it for years when the time comes and he passes away.
"I would have told you if you'd only asked me." Ouch. Yes, I can't help but think of a relationship that I had in the past that could have been different. *sigh* Thank you, Amanda. Peace.
This song is so powerful. Every time I hear it I am brought to tears thinking how important communication is. And how sad it is that some people lose it for so long. Amanda, thank you for bringing such a beautiful and powerful song to light.
So yeah... there I was rewatching this video and optimistically thought "Hey after listening to this over and over again last year, this surely can't make me tear up again now. Right?" Man, was I wrong. T_T #loveyaAFP
A lifetime of beauty and tragedy shown in 7 minutes narrated by one of the most heart-felt true-to-life songs I have heard in a long time...A masterpiece.
The story gets to me every time I hear the song. To think how many people go through life dealing (or NOT dealing) with their relationships in this way... I've been there. I hope the song serves as a wakeup call to people who've ended up in that place, where asking seems impossible. Your relationship(-s) and life a dead end. We have to ask. The art of fucking asking. We won't always get the answer we want, but even the wrong answer is better than remaining in the vacuum of that kind of life.
I just want to say, I'd love if Amanda saw this. This song, along with so many of your's really touch a part of my soul and heart (not to get fully cheesy here) but there is something about this song especially this that just makes me so emotional, I honestly think you are a complete creative genius, along with Neil (my favourite writer of all time) I find between both your works that it's like a surge of creativity and passion that really inspires me not only do the things I want without doubt. So thank you. You may never see these words but know that there is a boy somewhere in Scotland, Somewhere a little miss-understood, a little miss judged and a little miss guided but spurred on and trying his best to "make good art" fully inspired. thanks.
Have a sneaking suspicion this artist will only be universally recognised for their incredibly relevant and rare talent in a few decades like Cohen or the Velvets not that it matters much if you found her today. A pioneer. A bonfire of flickering blazing poetry and song bathing us all in our best light and making shadows magnificent. I bet Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab smell amazing on Amanda Palmer.
13 people have never felt this kind if pain love and loss or felt like they were losing the other person and were too afraid to ask what was wrong. So many things this song brings up so many regrets or things to learn from. I never want to take my partner for granted nor sleep back to back
y0ink1 Thanks, y0ink1. Friend Blake English introduced me to her. An utterly unique artist. Amazed at her ability to express herself outside of the mainstream and at same time achieve wide audience. Fascinating woman.
Robert Ozn Ahh, yes, welcome! I saw Blake English perform with her on stage in Atlanta this year. It was spectacular, he has a wonderful voice. It's great to see people being introduced to Amanda Palmer. =)
I'm really comforted by the fact that Amanda looks like she has tears in her eyes and is on the verge of tears at the end of the song, because I always am too. It's nice to know it's a shared feeling.
+shannon clarke i had to stop watching it because i got so bad i would cry at just the first piano notes.you see, i've been in that bed. im watching it now because i downloaded her sheet music and it's hard.
It's just as heartbreaking as I expected it to be. Amanda never fails to make me feel such a range of emotions in the space of one song. Still wiping away tears.
I tried to watch this again after a day to see if I could make it through without crying, but it still got me. Those last few lines and the final scene are heartbreaking
This is heartbreaking, beautiful, romantic and desolate all at the same time. Proof that Amanda is truly one of the most under rated artists around. Cant remember the last time a song made me feel so sad and joyous at the same time.
I lived this song for 12 years before realizing our apathy was killing us. Even though I'm in a beautiful, healthy relationship now, I still sometimes experience bed phobia. This song reminds me daily to try, no matter what.
When I heard The Bed Song for the first time, I cried. The second time, too. The revelation the final verse brings hit me like a litghtning, didn't expect it at all. This song had become my favourite out of the album before the album itself was made. Thank you for turning it into such a beautiful video, Amanda.
This is one of my absolute most favorite songs from Theatre is Evil, and the video is so much more heartbreaking. This was perfect. And the release date was perfect, too. For a holiday centered around romance and gifts, this reminds people to communicate openly and honestly with their partners. Sometimes we all need that little reminder.
ive started falling in love with here a lot of years ago with the Dresden Dolls, but this song squashes my heart every time..and still go back and put it on replay. still makes me cry
This song has just ripped my heart to shreds since the first time, the video just gives me a mental movie for the anguish. You are a master Amanda. I honestly love this song but have to skip it often to avoid feeling overwhelmingly sad when I should not.
What an extraordinary song from an extraordinary artist. I've grown up with Amanda Palmer singing the songs of my soul... my angsty, ridiculous teenage years with the Dresden Dolls as my soundtrack, and now hearing music like this in my 20's, connecting with my fears and thoughts as I age. I hope to hear more from her soon. Amanda, you're my hero. Thank you for being you and sharing yourself so freely.
Man it’s been years but I still tear up at the last line “I would have told you if only you’d ask me” cause it’s the realization all this time was wasted cause they didn’t just talk to each other; and we’re only truly honest when they died.
Played it to my husband and after the first bridge he begged me to stop. He was crying. We have just come out of the beginnings of TBS ... We both held each other & cried.
This is the first of your videos I've watched, Amanda--I found you through TED talks and wanted to check out your music. And this was so beautiful. It actually made me cry. Don't ever stop making music or telling stories because you have the gift for it.
I didn't think this could strike me. I've been crying for 15 minutes. To waste your whole life and your whole love, just by giving up so slowly that you don't see it - ripped out my heart and I needed that - seems it's still there....
Exhibit A: We are friends in a sleeping bag Splitting the heat we have one filthy pillow to share And your lips are in my hair Someone upstairs has a rat that we laugh at And people are drinking and singing Van Halen and Slayer On a ukulele dare Exhibit B: Well, we found an apartment It's not much to look at, a futon on the floor Torn off desktop for a door All the decor's made of milk crates and duct tape And if we have sex they can hear us through the floor But we don't do that anymore And I lay there wondering what is the matter Is this a matter of worse or of better You took the blanket so I took the bed sheet But I would have held you if you'd only let me Exhibit C: Look how quaint and how quiet and private Our paychecks have bought us a condo in town It's the nicest flat around You picked a mattress and had it delivered And I walked upstairs and the sight of it made my heart pound And I wrapped my arms around me And I stood there wondering what is the matter Is this a matter of worse or of better You walked right past me and straightened the covers And I would still love you if you wanted a lover And you said, "All the money in the world Won't buy a bed so big and wide To guarantee that you won't accidentally touch me in the night" Then I said, "You must be right" Exhibit D: Now we're both mostly paralyzed Don't know how long we've been lying here in fear Too afraid to even feel I find my glasses and you turn the light out Roll off on your side like you've rolled away for years Holding back those king-size tears And I still don't ask you what is the matter Is this a matter of worse or of better You take the heart failure I'll take the cancer I've long stopped wondering why you don't answer Exhibit E: You can certainly see How fulfilling a life from the cost and size of stone Of our final resting home We got some nice ones right under a cherry tree You and me lying the only way we know Side by side and still and cold And I finally ask you what was the matter Was it a matter of worse or of better You stretch your arms out and finally face me You say I would have told you If you'd only asked me If you'd only asked me If you'd only asked me
The matter was... Well, we'll never know, and neither will them, since they never actually talked about it... So the moral of the song is, DON'T HOLD BACK, be truthful to your feelings, is better to regret something you did than something you didn't
Nothing. Nothing was the matter. They both were doing what they thought the other one wanted. Neither of them were communicating their needs, and neither of them reached out, and they both would have done whatever the other wanted if they had just asked.
Or they would have spoken of it over a hundred times, promises would have been made and broken, over and over and over and over as the rejected partner died inside every day, her heart breaking repeatedly, until she was destroyed.
This is an exceptional combination of song and video. All of Amanda & tGTO's videos are a level above most, but this one... it's not a music video, it's a musical film.
scratch that, /whenever/ i watch this i get filled with intense sadness and i'm in tears or on the verge of them for the better part of half an hour afterward, and i can never explain why it hits me so hard every single time.
The part where she sings "I would have told you if you only asked me."? Cause this is the first time I've heard this song and that part just broke me down into tears.
Alexis Musick What first broke me into a million pieces (and still does each time I listen) is the lyric about the bed and the distance created between them from it. I can't help but openly weep. It's hard to listen to this while driving, that's for certain.
Ashy doodle Oh I can definitely agree with not being able to listen to this song while driving. The beginning of the song before the part that breaks me has my eyes brimmed with tears, so my vision is very blurred. It's just such a great song, I love it.
I really love you Amanda and everyone in this band. This made me cry but that's ok. It's more of a reminder to not be afraid to ask the ones you love about problems buried underneath the facades that we put up in daily life. It reminds you that you have to work at love. Ich leibe dich, Amanda Palmer.
WHen i saw Neil Gaiman read it, i knew it would love the song. And when i saw this video...Well, i can't believe i just cried. It's wonderful. THe video is perfect for the song. WONDERFUL.
Came back a year after first hearing the song, and... nope, still can't watch this video without crying. Flat-out weeping. Beautiful song, beautiful video, and absolutely heartbreaking the way they go together.
This song.. It seemed to mean so much when I heard it without the video. But I watched it again, and burst out into tears. I don't think it matters the age- anyone can feel this way..
When I listen to this song, it's the only time I'm ever sad about my failed marriage. It really says something about the writing that it can bring out emotions I didn't even know I still had. 8 years and a great relationship later, the video still choked me up.
I have watched this video/song so many times. I have shared it publicly on Face book, and also in private message where I no that the person on the other end will also appreciate is as much as I do. It is so very deep, meaningful and powerful. Yes, I too, shed tears each and every time I listen. It is the story of SO many many couples. Tragic, yet true. Message, try to fix things before it's too late. Talk, cry, learn, love, SHARE. My opinion only I am sure, but this song, is the best song I have ever heard from Amanda Palmer. Yes, there are so many more brilliant ones too. Yet for some reason, this one just sticks, and will not let go. It's so raw and so real. Thank you for posting this song, thank you very very much. With kind thoughts. Mindy
Thanks for making me cry Amanda.....it was beautiful, absolute work of art. I'm going to go hug my boyfriend now and tell him to watch this now..........tons of love to you. lovelovelovelovelove, d.
I remember when the live version of this song first popped up on TH-cam I thought it was the most beautiful song and listened to it over and over in my kitchen. Since then I have had two children, pretty amazing, and I still feel the same about the song. Thanks Amanda.
How can something be this perfect? Even the way her fingers dances over the piano keys is touching me. I guess that's why I keep doing this to myself...
This song I've known for many years already has encouraged me to always prioritize communication and clear expectations, it got me out of bad situations, and helped me in the good. I come back to it from time to time, so much emotion and wisdom!
Only Amanda has ever succeded in reducing me to tears. Between this and Have To Drive, I'm a sobbing mess. But bless this woman, for every song. Every thing. Its filled in part of me that was lost for a long time, and has restored faith in myself.
This is possibly the saddest song in the entire world.
What she sings about is so tragically ordinary.
+Tine Jakobsen yes. correct. totaly agree
This is absolutely the saddest song in the world.
Yes, and now I want to cry.
I feel like this story is written in my DNA. makes me bawl every time.
My daughter got a tattoo because of the lyrics of one of your songs when she was in college.(She showed it to you in St. Louis HA) It turned out a bit bigger than she imagined. LOL I don't care. I'm her mom. And you helped her when I didn't know how. She broke up with her first love in college and I KNEW what she was going through. I knew all I could do was listen. I was so scared for her. She was so into the Dresden Dolls then. She emailed you. I have no idea what she said but, I'm sure it was expressing her love of your music and how it was allowing her to "survive". YOU responding to her and WHAT you SAID helped her get through it. What you said turned things around for her. As a mom, I can never repay you for that. You mothered her when I knew but, didn't know how to help. What ever you said in that email to her helped her take a different focus. THANK YOU. Update in 2014 at 25...she is an amazing woman that I look up to and LOVE so much..my daughter, my child...grew into a lovely young woman.
theIAMofME this is beautiful!
I hope she's still doing well and you too, thanks for posting your beautiful story.
❤❤❤❤❤
It is years later and I cried a bit at the end of the song, and then more from your story. Thank you.
I'm watching this because I was on a Neil Gaiman video binge, and watched a video with him and Amanda Palmer (they seem to be beautifully in love), where she was describing writing this song -- I haven't listened to much of her music before. I was married for a while once, for several years, but we grew apart and he wouldn't do anything about his snoring and I slept in a different room because I needed my sleep for my career . . . then our politics went separate directions and he crashed his career and I left and I'm happier and he's probably still sad.
Life is just one story after another, isn't it?
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
I am a grown man and this makes me cry... and yet I listen to it again and again.
me too
most women will find that totally hot
I'm with you dude
Stupid
I don't think this song could ever make me not break up emotionally.
I always break into tears the moment i hear her sing "I long stop wondering why you dont answer" Its so sad. yet its so beautiful
+samarria777 I do the same thing only always at "I would have told you if only you'd asked me". The regret is just so poignant there.
samarria777 if you’ve only asked me
this song gets even sadder when you presence this lack of communication every day. Its like I am seeing my parents on the screen. It's also amazing, in a way, that humans can have the same problems under so different circumstances
I was trying to figure out why i like her music... and then i caught myself thinking about the story... and i realised shes a damn good storyteller.
I was taken to an Evelyn Evelyn show, and Amanda did some of her solo work afterwards. This song was one of them.
I’d never heard it before, and let me tell you, it had that same effect of causing me to burst into tears right there in public that it still has after multiple listens. She just nailed that feeling of a young relationship that drifts apart over time even though all of the milestones we think we want are being achieved.
She does it in a way everyone can relate to because, as someone else said, it’s “ordinary”, this slow death of what was once so special and intimate, but that doesn’t make it any less tragic.
As someone with extensive social anxiety, I really have to say that this song has helped open my eyes a little bit. I cry every single time I listen to it, but I feel like its message has helped me feel not so... Afraid of asking people, well, what was the matter. I always have to listen to it more than once.
This song came out shortly after my divorce and it so clearly described the death of our relationship...it was frightening...it was tragic...it was spot on. This is the song that allowed me to move past a lifetime of "men don't cry"...it allowed me to feel the pain that that I had shut away...it allowed me to cry unashamedly (eventually) and it still brings tears to my eyes whenever I hear it (sometimes even on purpose). As always, thank you, Amanda! I will forever continue to wear Slayer shirts to your shows...
It also happened to me and my ex-long term partner. My suspicion is this type of relationship is rather more common than we think it is.
I'm 70 and I saw her perform this in Raleigh, NC. It was a small venue and I was paralised! I listen to it often. She is a great pianist!
I still can't sing along to this song without getting too choked up for any sound to come out. This is still one of the most heartbreaking songs I've ever heard.
This song is so clearly a fable, and one I will heed to heart for sure, but does anyone else just get filled to the brim with despair at just hearing a few chords from this song? I am obsessed with Amanda so I listed to this song til I knew it by heart but now I can't. It makes me deeply weep with sticky longing and loneliness.
I absolutely love this song, but sometimes I have to skip it when it comes on because I just can’t take feeling that way at that moment.
This is the kind of song that reminds me to tell my wife and kids everyday that I love them, that they are so precious to me, and I cherish them.
Now, go do it. Don't be afraid to be honest. And don't risk carrying regret.
your comment and this song makes me love hearing my dad (I'm 11) telling me that he loves me even though he picks on me. and it makes me appreciate that I hug my parents before bed every night. :")
I hope five years later you still feel the same. I am 38 now and I don't know what I am more afraid of - telling my father that I love him or regretting not having done it for years when the time comes and he passes away.
"I would have told you if you'd only asked me." Ouch. Yes, I can't help but think of a relationship that I had in the past that could have been different. *sigh* Thank you, Amanda. Peace.
This song is so powerful. Every time I hear it I am brought to tears thinking how important communication is. And how sad it is that some people lose it for so long. Amanda, thank you for bringing such a beautiful and powerful song to light.
*911*- "911 whats your emergency?"
*me*- (sniffs) "my heart"
So yeah... there I was rewatching this video and optimistically thought "Hey after listening to this over and over again last year, this surely can't make me tear up again now. Right?"
Man, was I wrong. T_T
#loveyaAFP
When I was going through a rough time with my husband, I would watch this and sob because it out it better than I could.
Any one else cry their eyes out?
A lifetime of beauty and tragedy shown in 7 minutes narrated by one of the most heart-felt true-to-life songs I have heard in a long time...A masterpiece.
How is it 11 years on and this song can still bring me to tears? Magical.
Wonderful song. Probably Amanda's masterpiece.
The story gets to me every time I hear the song. To think how many people go through life dealing (or NOT dealing) with their relationships in this way... I've been there. I hope the song serves as a wakeup call to people who've ended up in that place, where asking seems impossible. Your relationship(-s) and life a dead end. We have to ask. The art of fucking asking. We won't always get the answer we want, but even the wrong answer is better than remaining in the vacuum of that kind of life.
Yep. Crying now. Lovely.
Still makes me cry after all those years
I can't believe this song is as old as it is. I still remember the day it released.
I just want to say, I'd love if Amanda saw this. This song, along with so many of your's really touch a part of my soul and heart (not to get fully cheesy here) but there is something about this song especially this that just makes me so emotional, I honestly think you are a complete creative genius, along with Neil (my favourite writer of all time) I find between both your works that it's like a surge of creativity and passion that really inspires me not only do the things I want without doubt. So thank you. You may never see these words but know that there is a boy somewhere in Scotland, Somewhere a little miss-understood, a little miss judged and a little miss guided but spurred on and trying his best to "make good art" fully inspired. thanks.
This is the most passionate song I have ever heard - absolutely brilliant
Have a sneaking suspicion this artist will only be universally recognised for their incredibly relevant and rare talent in a few decades like Cohen or the Velvets not that it matters much if you found her today. A pioneer. A bonfire of flickering blazing poetry and song bathing us all in our best light and making shadows magnificent. I bet Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab smell amazing on Amanda Palmer.
no matter how many times, i can't listen to this song without crying.
Every time my husband tells me he misses my tiny ratty studio apartment when we first started dating, I think about this song and cry a bit inside.
13 people have never felt this kind if pain love and loss or felt like they were losing the other person and were too afraid to ask what was wrong. So many things this song brings up so many regrets or things to learn from. I never want to take my partner for granted nor sleep back to back
I feel like this song is becoming my reality and it makes me so sad
:( I hope you still have time to move in another direction
5 years and this song still gives me instant shivers. The best kind of shivers.
Exquisite metaphor. Beautifully structured. Poignant. Respect. I am new to this artist. I am now an instant fan.
Robert Ozn Welcome to the club :)
y0ink1 Thanks, y0ink1. Friend Blake English introduced me to her. An utterly unique artist. Amazed at her ability to express herself outside of the mainstream and at same time achieve wide audience. Fascinating woman.
Welcome! Don't forget the tissues. This woman is superb with expressing such strong emotions.
Robert Ozn Ahh, yes, welcome! I saw Blake English perform with her on stage in Atlanta this year. It was spectacular, he has a wonderful voice. It's great to see people being introduced to Amanda Palmer. =)
I'm really comforted by the fact that Amanda looks like she has tears in her eyes and is on the verge of tears at the end of the song, because I always am too. It's nice to know it's a shared feeling.
This song is so moving it makes me feel like crying. What a very powerful message,
I can't stop replaying this, my eyes are sore and i look like shit but god this song makes me feel alive in a bittersweet way.
+shannon clarke i had to stop watching it because i got so bad i would cry at just the first piano notes.you see, i've been in that bed. im watching it now because i downloaded her sheet music and it's hard.
+shannon clarke same here...
Makes me cry every time!
The first and probably only song that makes me cry.
I was warned not to watch this but I had to watch it out of curiosity. I should've listened. I am now a crying mess
The ending is tragic but beautiful. I love how delicate it all is.
oh goodness... I haven't felt this pang in my chest over a song in a really long time... Amanda your music changes lives. Even the small ones.
I'll never be able to listen to this without crying.
It's just as heartbreaking as I expected it to be. Amanda never fails to make me feel such a range of emotions in the space of one song. Still wiping away tears.
I hold back the tears the entire video but right when she sings, "I would have told you if you would have asked me." I start fucking balling.
I've always loved this song, because it breaks my heart.
I tried to watch this again after a day to see if I could make it through without crying, but it still got me. Those last few lines and the final scene are heartbreaking
This got to me. I flooded my town.
***** That's a twist: "How was your day, sweetie?" "It was good, until the Water Nation flooded the town."
This makes me cry.
This is heartbreaking, beautiful, romantic and desolate all at the same time. Proof that Amanda is truly one of the most under rated artists around. Cant remember the last time a song made me feel so sad and joyous at the same time.
Amanda...gets me every time - VERY emotional - speechless...
I lived this song for 12 years before realizing our apathy was killing us. Even though I'm in a beautiful, healthy relationship now, I still sometimes experience bed phobia. This song reminds me daily to try, no matter what.
When I heard The Bed Song for the first time, I cried. The second time, too. The revelation the final verse brings hit me like a litghtning, didn't expect it at all. This song had become my favourite out of the album before the album itself was made. Thank you for turning it into such a beautiful video, Amanda.
I've never, ever cried at a song before, but I am sobbing right now. Beautiful video and a lovely representation of the lyrics.
TLDW: communicate with your partner so you dont have to be super distant for years on end
I cry unabashedly every. Single. Time
I saw afp in Raleigh NC. She is quite accomplished pianist! I think a good number in the crowd were shedding tears at the bed song!
2024, and i still love this song
This is one of my absolute most favorite songs from Theatre is Evil, and the video is so much more heartbreaking. This was perfect. And the release date was perfect, too. For a holiday centered around romance and gifts, this reminds people to communicate openly and honestly with their partners. Sometimes we all need that little reminder.
ive started falling in love with here a lot of years ago with the Dresden Dolls,
but this song squashes my heart every time..and still go back and put it on replay.
still makes me cry
This song has just ripped my heart to shreds since the first time, the video just gives me a mental movie for the anguish. You are a master Amanda. I honestly love this song but have to skip it often to avoid feeling overwhelmingly sad when I should not.
What an extraordinary song from an extraordinary artist. I've grown up with Amanda Palmer singing the songs of my soul... my angsty, ridiculous teenage years with the Dresden Dolls as my soundtrack, and now hearing music like this in my 20's, connecting with my fears and thoughts as I age. I hope to hear more from her soon. Amanda, you're my hero. Thank you for being you and sharing yourself so freely.
still crying 2018
Lasted almost 6 minutes before I found tears rolling down my cheeks. Simply beautiful. Amazing job to everyone involved and thank you.
Man it’s been years but I still tear up at the last line “I would have told you if only you’d ask me” cause it’s the realization all this time was wasted cause they didn’t just talk to each other; and we’re only truly honest when they died.
Played it to my husband and after the first bridge he begged me to stop. He was crying. We have just come out of the beginnings of TBS ... We both held each other & cried.
This is the first of your videos I've watched, Amanda--I found you through TED talks and wanted to check out your music. And this was so beautiful. It actually made me cry. Don't ever stop making music or telling stories because you have the gift for it.
I just now today 5/15/2014 became a fan of this extraordinary performer. Thank you to my daughter Jessica for introducing me to Amanda Palmer.
I cry everytime I hear this song. But the video helps me cry a little less...only because Amanda's beautiful face makes me smile.
When a song is so relevant to you it makes it that much better.
I didn't think this could strike me. I've been crying for 15 minutes. To waste your whole life and your whole love, just by giving up so slowly that you don't see it - ripped out my heart and I needed that - seems it's still there....
Exhibit A:
We are friends in a sleeping bag
Splitting the heat we have one filthy pillow to share
And your lips are in my hair
Someone upstairs has a rat that we laugh at
And people are drinking and singing Van Halen and Slayer
On a ukulele dare
Exhibit B:
Well, we found an apartment
It's not much to look at, a futon on the floor
Torn off desktop for a door
All the decor's made of milk crates and duct tape
And if we have sex they can hear us through the floor
But we don't do that anymore
And I lay there wondering what is the matter
Is this a matter of worse or of better
You took the blanket so I took the bed sheet
But I would have held you if you'd only let me
Exhibit C:
Look how quaint and how quiet and private
Our paychecks have bought us a condo in town
It's the nicest flat around
You picked a mattress and had it delivered
And I walked upstairs and the sight of it made my heart pound
And I wrapped my arms around me
And I stood there wondering what is the matter
Is this a matter of worse or of better
You walked right past me and straightened the covers
And I would still love you if you wanted a lover
And you said, "All the money in the world
Won't buy a bed so big and wide
To guarantee that you won't accidentally touch me in the night"
Then I said, "You must be right"
Exhibit D:
Now we're both mostly paralyzed
Don't know how long we've been lying here in fear
Too afraid to even feel
I find my glasses and you turn the light out
Roll off on your side like you've rolled away for years
Holding back those king-size tears
And I still don't ask you what is the matter
Is this a matter of worse or of better
You take the heart failure I'll take the cancer
I've long stopped wondering why you don't answer
Exhibit E:
You can certainly see
How fulfilling a life from the cost and size of stone
Of our final resting home
We got some nice ones right under a cherry tree
You and me lying the only way we know
Side by side and still and cold
And I finally ask you what was the matter
Was it a matter of worse or of better
You stretch your arms out and finally face me
You say
I would have told you
If you'd only asked me
If you'd only asked me
If you'd only asked me
I used to almost cry with the old version... But this video... And this version... I'm like drowning in tears.
But... But... BUT... WHAT WAS IT??! WHATWAASTHEMATTER
The matter was... Well, we'll never know, and neither will them, since they never actually talked about it... So the moral of the song is, DON'T HOLD BACK, be truthful to your feelings, is better to regret something you did than something you didn't
Nothing. Nothing was the matter. They both were doing what they thought the other one wanted. Neither of them were communicating their needs, and neither of them reached out, and they both would have done whatever the other wanted if they had just asked.
Or they would have spoken of it over a hundred times, promises would have been made and broken, over and over and over and over as the rejected partner died inside every day, her heart breaking repeatedly, until she was destroyed.
Amanda I cry each and every time I hear this song. I hope you know how powerful it is.
This is an exceptional combination of song and video. All of Amanda & tGTO's videos are a level above most, but this one... it's not a music video, it's a musical film.
Oh my god I'm crying my eyes out right now this is so beautiful and so painful
The first time someone showed me this song/video, I burst into tears. I really hope I never have to know what that's like.
Thank you
I was crying even before everyone died at the end. But it was a good kind of cry. Beautiful. Sublimely, heart-rendingly beautiful. Thank you.
This still breaks me into tears every single time I hear it
I think it's perfect this video was released on Valentine's day. Amanda is one of the best lyricist of out time.
so much raw and beautiful truth. crying in a cafe and it's wonderful.
scratch that, /whenever/ i watch this i get filled with intense sadness and i'm in tears or on the verge of them for the better part of half an hour afterward, and i can never explain why it hits me so hard every single time.
The part where she sings "I would have told you if you only asked me."? Cause this is the first time I've heard this song and that part just broke me down into tears.
Alexis Musick What first broke me into a million pieces (and still does each time I listen) is the lyric about the bed and the distance created between them from it. I can't help but openly weep. It's hard to listen to this while driving, that's for certain.
Ashy doodle Oh I can definitely agree with not being able to listen to this song while driving. The beginning of the song before the part that breaks me has my eyes brimmed with tears, so my vision is very blurred. It's just such a great song, I love it.
I really love you Amanda and everyone in this band. This made me cry but that's ok. It's more of a reminder to not be afraid to ask the ones you love about problems buried underneath the facades that we put up in daily life. It reminds you that you have to work at love. Ich leibe dich, Amanda Palmer.
I’ll never stop listening to this song.
That’s the first time in my life a music video has exceed my expectations after hearing the song.
Thank you.
I try not to listen to this song very often, it always makes me cry.
WHen i saw Neil Gaiman read it, i knew it would love the song. And when i saw this video...Well, i can't believe i just cried. It's wonderful. THe video is perfect for the song. WONDERFUL.
Came back a year after first hearing the song, and... nope, still can't watch this video without crying. Flat-out weeping. Beautiful song, beautiful video, and absolutely heartbreaking the way they go together.
This makes me cry my heart out. It's one of the songs that you cannot listen to over and over again because the feelings are way too heavy.
I'm crying. the new version is actually more heartbreaking than the old one. the video is beautiful too.
This song.. It seemed to mean so much when I heard it without the video. But I watched it again, and burst out into tears. I don't think it matters the age- anyone can feel this way..
When I listen to this song, it's the only time I'm ever sad about my failed marriage. It really says something about the writing that it can bring out emotions I didn't even know I still had. 8 years and a great relationship later, the video still choked me up.
This is far and away the saddest song on the album. And I absolutely love it.
I have watched this video/song so many times. I have shared it publicly on Face book, and also in private message where I no that the person on the other end will also appreciate is as much as I do. It is so very deep, meaningful and powerful. Yes, I too, shed tears each and every time I listen. It is the story of SO many many couples. Tragic, yet true. Message, try to fix things before it's too late. Talk, cry, learn, love, SHARE. My opinion only I am sure, but this song, is the best song I have ever heard from Amanda Palmer. Yes, there are so many more brilliant ones too. Yet for some reason, this one just sticks, and will not let go. It's so raw and so real. Thank you for posting this song, thank you very very much. With kind thoughts. Mindy
Thanks for making me cry Amanda.....it was beautiful, absolute work of art. I'm going to go hug my boyfriend now and tell him to watch this now..........tons of love to you. lovelovelovelovelove, d.
I remember when the live version of this song first popped up on TH-cam I thought it was the most beautiful song and listened to it over and over in my kitchen. Since then I have had two children, pretty amazing, and I still feel the same about the song. Thanks Amanda.
How can something be this perfect? Even the way her fingers dances over the piano keys is touching me. I guess that's why I keep doing this to myself...
This song I've known for many years already has encouraged me to always prioritize communication and clear expectations, it got me out of bad situations, and helped me in the good. I come back to it from time to time, so much emotion and wisdom!
Only Amanda has ever succeded in reducing me to tears. Between this and Have To Drive, I'm a sobbing mess. But bless this woman, for every song. Every thing. Its filled in part of me that was lost for a long time, and has restored faith in myself.