How to win a negotiation | Chris Voss, Dan Shapiro & more | Big Think

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 26 ธ.ค. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 139

  • @bigthink
    @bigthink  4 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    Which negotiation tip did you like the most?

    • @PRATEEK30111989
      @PRATEEK30111989 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Shapiro and voss

    • @aimonwongsaparn4031
      @aimonwongsaparn4031 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Isn’t there a limit on the ads on a vdo, it is16 mins in and I had to skip more than 10 ads already. A bit much?

    • @danielsayre3385
      @danielsayre3385 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I liked Voss's style of negotiation the most, with the focus on empathy. Regardless, everyone in this video is giving phenomenal advice.

    • @jaredmowry8544
      @jaredmowry8544 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Positions and Interests are f’ing synonymous! One’s interest IS his/her position in the negotiation. Then here comes this lady encouraging people to whine…“I wanna, I wanna, I wanna.” This is a joke I hate this video

    • @dlon4539
      @dlon4539 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@jaredmowry8544 Now you can empathise with the recipients of American foreign policy

  • @dawgisntdog
    @dawgisntdog ปีที่แล้ว +20

    1. Position bargaining: focus on the underlined interest
    2. Body language and voice tone could affect the opposite party
    3. Motivation interview on the scale 1 to 10 , how do you feel you are ready

  • @tylerrjohnson68
    @tylerrjohnson68 3 ปีที่แล้ว +50

    Just saying no is a good practice. As he said, it immediately puts you in a defensive position they have to overcome.

  • @ReflectionOcean
    @ReflectionOcean ปีที่แล้ว +2

    1. Recognize unshown cards in negotiations (0:00)
    2. Understand mutual benefits and interests (0:04, 3:19, 4:07)
    3. Employ positional bargaining strategically (0:33)
    4. Set clear negotiation boundaries (1:17)
    5. Use patience as a negotiation tactic (2:22)
    6. Explore interests beyond positions (3:25)
    7. Never settle for a single ask (3:38)
    8. Master the use of 'no' for protection (5:36)
    9. Seek agreement through empathy and understanding (7:34)
    10. Influence mood and cooperation with voice tone (9:07)
    11. Observe and interpret body language (9:58)
    12. Use downward and upward inflection purposefully (10:21)
    13. Elicit self-motivated reasons for agreement (11:56)
    14. Gain the upper hand with strategic questioning (16:19)
    15. Be cautious with the concept of fairness (19:41)
    16. Consider random strategies in zero-sum situations (22:02)
    17. Summarize to show understanding and connect (24:36)

  • @KeyserSoseRulz
    @KeyserSoseRulz 4 ปีที่แล้ว +49

    Every time I ask my boss "How am I supposed to do that?", the answer is a mix of "Figure it out" or "Find a way or I will find someone that can".
    MBA platitudes are, well, platitudes.

    • @RichLuciano1
      @RichLuciano1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Been there; done that.
      "Figure it out."
      A: "Oh. I have been. It's actually not a problem I can solve, so if you want this deal to happen you need to answer that question." --C.V.
      "Find a way or I will find someone that can."
      A: "It seems like you want me to fail," or "Do you want me to fail?" or "So you're telling me you're powerless here(?)"
      These aren't that great but he says it works for him. How acceptable is this?

    • @KeyserSoseRulz
      @KeyserSoseRulz 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@sheeraz_ And yet (s)he is still the boss. Reality doesn't care about your feelings.

    • @Account.for.Comment
      @Account.for.Comment 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@sheeraz_ Except they would disagreed over the paths to it and their interests are conflicted with each other. Between their interest of seeing good results or acting superior to you, having you negotiate/talk against with them already exposed them in losing the second one. Not having the negotiation in the first place is better for them at least for their ego in the short run.

    • @marko6489
      @marko6489 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      "It seems like the most important trait you are looking for in your employe is to be able to think on their own and figure things out without always checking in with you. That is crucial because that is the only way, we as a team, can do a well job, plus it gives you time and focus to do your job, which you can't do if you always have to others people job."
      ...from the top of my head. What you need to do is summarize his perspective, but in a status-friendly way, so he turns out to be a good guy of the summary. The goal is to make him say, THAT'S RIGHT... when he says that, which he likely will if you say something that makes him look good and makes sense, then you proceed with no-oriented question. The best one: "Do you want me to fail?"... you can add flair to the question by connection it to the summary above like: "Do you want me to fail at my task and setback team's progress?"
      IN GENERAL, if boss or someone gives you a hostile answer such is that one, always go for tactical empathy. Summarize their perspective in objective manner (using: it seems like, it looks like, it sounds like, ..)

    • @marko6489
      @marko6489 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      The thing is, what he is saying with: "Figure it out, else.." is that he has things to do on his own, and has no time doing your job, that is why it is your job in the first place. So you have to point that out through objective, neutral perspective summary. He will then see you understand situation and be willing to help you.

  • @KD9-37
    @KD9-37 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Chris Voss is such a legend. I want to learn from him sooooooooooooooooooooo BAD.

  • @superhooper425
    @superhooper425 2 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    I completely had no clue of how significant FUBU was as a mindset. Now as an adult it makes so much sense. Pioneers are courageous innovators.

    • @gigantopithecushominoidea8779
      @gigantopithecushominoidea8779 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      I doubt if he petended to be poor his skills would work like that loooool

    • @linw7320
      @linw7320 ปีที่แล้ว

      FUBU?

    • @HealthnHoop
      @HealthnHoop ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@linw7320 For Us By Us is a brand of clothing

  • @Bigfoot_With_Internet_Access
    @Bigfoot_With_Internet_Access 4 ปีที่แล้ว +159

    I wish I could negotiate with the hikers and campers who always trespass in my forest so that I could convince them to leave

    • @davlmt
      @davlmt 4 ปีที่แล้ว +32

      That's not YOUR forest

    • @anthonysaffioti9048
      @anthonysaffioti9048 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Have you tried appealing to their self interest
      It’s easy
      Take your shot gun load it point it and negotiate their exit in return for not hurrying them in your forest that they love so much

    • @drnumlock
      @drnumlock 4 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      Dear Bigfoot, have you tried an eating or loghurling competition to settle the matter?

    • @mrthugamer7603
      @mrthugamer7603 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Ask: how would you feel when people are making fires a few meters from your house? Wouldn't you feel a little anxious about something catching fire and burning your house down?"

    • @anthonysaffioti9048
      @anthonysaffioti9048 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Mr ThuGamer Mate, I wasn’t being sarcastic! I had the same problem and I agree 100 percent with you
      After the bushfire season in Australia , I would not tolerate people on my land ...not at all

  • @RubiconDota
    @RubiconDota 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    The opposite of the F bomb is the E bomb. Superiors love the word Efficient. When you speak in terms of improving efficiency, managers become much more amenable to your requests

  • @mainhitranngoc8556
    @mainhitranngoc8556 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This video is pure gold. I can't thank you guys enough ❤❤❤

  • @Talkinglife
    @Talkinglife 4 ปีที่แล้ว +33

    Tips on How to Negotiate
    Tough Guys Don't Win. Good negotiation creates a deal that both parties feel good about. ...
    Listen. The key to successful negotiation is truly understanding the other party's wants, needs and motivations. ...
    Coinage. ...
    Preparation. ...

  • @aaronsmith6632
    @aaronsmith6632 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    How I negotiate: Look for the Win-Win. Sometimes it requires creativity.

  • @damienhunt4264
    @damienhunt4264 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    The problem is that all my competitors have watched this video.

  • @wilhelmsarasalo3546
    @wilhelmsarasalo3546 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Young people tend to have seemingly messy rooms, but they have a mental capacity to stay on top of it. Older people seem to be bothered by that, perhaps because their mental capacity has already been taken up. They tend to have more organized rooms.

  • @hemanthsai4584
    @hemanthsai4584 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    What if my opponent watched your video??😂

  • @thelongwayhome4129
    @thelongwayhome4129 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I love this content and page! Thanks guys

  • @drollette08
    @drollette08 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    I wish my mother would negotiate with me instead to beat the crap out of me to do house chores

    • @yushi8373
      @yushi8373 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      You can negotiate with her! ❤Small people have power too!

    • @iironhide6209
      @iironhide6209 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@yushi8373maybe. It’s really hard to negotiate when the other party has superiority of force. Not impossible though

  • @anjrued
    @anjrued 4 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    Dan Shapiro is not Ben Shapiro, dummies.

  • @muskduh
    @muskduh 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    thanks for the video

  • @aquavit
    @aquavit ปีที่แล้ว

    Rebuttal from management to asking "how am I supposed to do that?": "figure it out.".

  • @PrateekJain-pi9jc
    @PrateekJain-pi9jc 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Daniel pink had by far the best, most actionable advice
    Daymond john was a waste of my time. "If someone is putting their hair behind their ear means they want to listen to me" like Wtf is that shit.

  • @ajball3257
    @ajball3257 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Aren’t these the same people who wrote the book “getting to yes”? But 6:05 they say we need to get out of the getting to yes mindset. LOL

  • @cp37373
    @cp37373 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Can you not put a thousand ads in the video ya thanks

  • @capngrace84
    @capngrace84 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This is fantastic

  • @danielcostello7170
    @danielcostello7170 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    13:11 this whole technique falls apart when Maria gives you a one. Or anything less than one even though it breaks the constraints of the question.

    • @pieohpie
      @pieohpie 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      you should watch the video lol

  • @karinturkington2455
    @karinturkington2455 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    There is an assumption that emotions interfere with negotiations. What if you're being manipulated throughout the process because you just don't know what the process is?

  • @mohsin_moin-ur-rasheed
    @mohsin_moin-ur-rasheed 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    They all seems to be very decent and intelligent people, we can literally see on their faces that they all know what they consider best way to go about negotiating and with each partys getting the maximum utility for their selves. yes
    Still all this negotiation feels so dishonest and promoting a scheming, cunning mindset with having having an agenda about only ourselves. ?

  • @ReallyNo.01
    @ReallyNo.01 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I want a well thought out multi level of transportation rules with speed limits change elevation rules and requirements limited at the ionosphere. Also a safety for lighting bolts and electric surge and management.

  • @Abdulnajib
    @Abdulnajib ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Someone send this to the Chelsea board and Boehly.

  • @nevalans9524
    @nevalans9524 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    How do you negotiate with someone who hates you?

    • @holgergrauslund
      @holgergrauslund 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Create empathy by giving words to the root of their hate. Admit if you failed or did something wrong, and talk about how they might feel about you. Then you have created a friendly and peaceful negotiation environment.

  • @MissMyMusicAddiction
    @MissMyMusicAddiction ปีที่แล้ว +1

    i feel like i need to just hire a negotiating team and get out of the way
    like, for everything.

  • @kaluosu377
    @kaluosu377 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Jordan Belfort’s Straight Line Persuasion

  • @dlon4539
    @dlon4539 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I am a complete arsehole when: I'm hungry, exhausted, misinformed (ill equipped) and especially when I'm in an urgent rush to complete an action.

  • @JustMe-ob3nw
    @JustMe-ob3nw 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thinking rationally about it will not eliminate the fact that I am broke 😩 -

  • @danielcostello7170
    @danielcostello7170 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Why would a seller have a ceiling? Why would a buyer have a floor?

    • @波紋小石
      @波紋小石 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Think about what that might look like. Suppose you're selling a watch for $1000 and a buyer comes in offering $10000 in cash. On the flip side, suppose you're shopping for a certain $10000 dollar watch and you see someone selling one of them for $1000. Take the deal? Maybe it's too good to be true. Maybe the cash is counterfeit or the watch is defective. Maybe they're dirty and you'll be dealing with police later on. Maybe you'll owe a favor. So a price advantage is important, but it doesn't always make a deal good.
      This video seems to advocate multilayer prep. You should do enough price research to understand what a reasonable price is, why this place looks promising, and where you'll go for a deal if this one turns bad. But that prep still leaves you vulnerable. If you come in without researching interests, or fail to anticipate another's tactics, you could get bullied or tricked. You could walk away from a good deal or accept a bad deal based simply on price.

  • @gabrielaradu2970
    @gabrielaradu2970 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Would you negotiate with someone who is not trustworthy? If so, why and how would you do it? Although I know the difference between persuasion and manipulation, sometimes I find myself in situations that are not good for me, where I am used and abused.

    • @Stoneybv
      @Stoneybv ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Bc you can still get something out of it depending on what you want. Now how to do it depends on the person and how trustworthy you are and how you trust. But it always depends on this, always trust someone to be themselves.

    • @cuteaisyah23
      @cuteaisyah23 ปีที่แล้ว

      Min😊

  • @crowleythedemonking56
    @crowleythedemonking56 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    sadly here in the philippines you cannot negotiate with a contract, even if you have the experience that they are looking for.

    • @ghabhimoz8560
      @ghabhimoz8560 ปีที่แล้ว

      Win the negotiation before attempting the negotiation outside

  • @OmegaMouse
    @OmegaMouse ปีที่แล้ว

    I love how ya'll know how to manipulate people.

  • @anonanon7377
    @anonanon7377 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Man comes into car dealership and lies, "I don't need a car today. I'm happy with my current car." Car dealer, "OKay, this other honest guy needs this today. He has cash. He will pay slightly higher than you. He isn't a jerk. He gets it." [Used car dealer gives purchaser a lemon that the dishonest purchaser was better off without.] That is reality. Honest guy gets cheated in end.

  • @kubonamartinyafesi2752
    @kubonamartinyafesi2752 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    Impressive

  • @krishna_kandel
    @krishna_kandel ปีที่แล้ว

    GOOD

  • @ReallyNo.01
    @ReallyNo.01 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    I want an answer for the truckers?

  • @lateral1881
    @lateral1881 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    What you can afford to lose means you don't by negotiation. Let them think they have won because they are weak

  • @SgtMantis
    @SgtMantis ปีที่แล้ว

    This guy is a cop. Nice.

  • @pierce1234567891
    @pierce1234567891 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    How Ben Shapiro “debates” talks fast and uses big words against college students

    • @brianmccauley7860
      @brianmccauley7860 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      He destroys people with facts and logic

    • @pierce1234567891
      @pierce1234567891 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Brian McCauley watch his bbc interview

    • @brianmccauley7860
      @brianmccauley7860 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @jriden It’s a meme lighten up

    • @Jeff-iz9hn
      @Jeff-iz9hn 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Dan Shapiro not Ben Shapiro

  • @johnong2655
    @johnong2655 ปีที่แล้ว

    How am I supposed to do that? That question was really overused in the past. Now, we still hear that, but it's not that useful anymore

  • @VokeVideo
    @VokeVideo 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Body language is almost 100%. "What you say" is a TINY percentage.

  • @aseema2408
    @aseema2408 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Lmao Ben Shapiro doesn't negotiate. He just says, "FaCtS dOnT cArE aBoUt yOuR FeeLinGs"

  • @Alehzinhah
    @Alehzinhah ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Chinese people don't negotiate like this. They put straight on their goal, and their limits. If you agree, it's on, if not, "next". This "tug of war" we play with in the west is too much stressful. Hardballing is a lot better, cost a lot less money.

    • @Alehzinhah
      @Alehzinhah ปีที่แล้ว

      See, all this "tips" are just so stupid. Why do we need to waist so much time to get a fair price for anything?!

  • @arnab6408
    @arnab6408 ปีที่แล้ว

    "In Somalia killing is negotiating", Mohammed Farah Aidid.

  • @VokeVideo
    @VokeVideo 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    22:03 this guy gives way too little context. What?

  • @quratulain3893
    @quratulain3893 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Unfortunately,these techniques donot work in my country....it makes me think they are innocent 😈

    • @AlexandraofUnusualIdeas
      @AlexandraofUnusualIdeas 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      interesting! would u elaborate?

    • @quratulain3893
      @quratulain3893 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@AlexandraofUnusualIdeas my god... Dude I don't remember in what context I said that two years ago...must be going through something hard or sad😂

  • @RichLuciano1
    @RichLuciano1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Incorporating Chris Voss into negotiations resulted in the worst negotiations I've ever had.

    • @neilghosh3821
      @neilghosh3821 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Really? How did it play out?

    • @RichLuciano1
      @RichLuciano1 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@neilghosh3821 thanks to his help, work has become twice a hard, long, and expensive to operate.

    • @neilghosh3821
      @neilghosh3821 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Richard Luciano did you literally follow his advice? Like using the phrases he used in the book?
      Like “how am I supposed to do that”

    • @RichLuciano1
      @RichLuciano1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@neilghosh3821 yes

    • @neilghosh3821
      @neilghosh3821 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Richard Luciano I think the advices works more effectively in social situations rather than business ones.

  • @paladinbob1236
    @paladinbob1236 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    when i saw it had ben shapiro ..telling me how to win a negotiation...then thats a no-no for me...i still remember ben shapiro getting upset and leaving when he was discussing politics and trying to sell his book with andrew neil and it going dreadfully wrong for him :(

    • @heidiheidi0
      @heidiheidi0 4 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Its not ben shapiro.

    • @KrsnamVJm
      @KrsnamVJm 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Dan Shapiro is a different person.

    • @ddpwe5269
      @ddpwe5269 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      lol glad you were watching the same video as us.......oh wait, apparently not =P

  • @jaredmowry8544
    @jaredmowry8544 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Is Zollman reading off of a damn autocue or is he really just that gauche?

  • @danielcostello7170
    @danielcostello7170 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    1:19 How much tanning agent is considered blackface? Borderline. If you don't want to look a fool, don't dress a fool.

  • @martialmusic
    @martialmusic 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    There are not enough practical instructions to go out and use this

  • @nahulseyon54
    @nahulseyon54 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    8th view 3rd like 2nd comment

  • @oscaracosta1990
    @oscaracosta1990 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Cool im smarter

  • @stephaniegarcia4090
    @stephaniegarcia4090 ปีที่แล้ว

    so....manipulate

  • @MRAssan999
    @MRAssan999 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    P

  • @meantares
    @meantares ปีที่แล้ว

    All advice offered in this video is very superficial. Without examples and a bit more substance to support their thesis, it’s not much help.

  • @waedjradi
    @waedjradi 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    Meticulous.

  • @yarolevada7062
    @yarolevada7062 ปีที่แล้ว

    He is talking about the tone of voice here but his own voice is sooo slow and tired here, completely energy-less, unpleasant to listen to

  • @meepmeepvroom2200
    @meepmeepvroom2200 ปีที่แล้ว

    This video is a lot of nonsense and assumes that you're always reasoning with a sensible person that'll give something.
    There are people who will say no 40x. There are people who will say they are a 0 and there's nothing you could do to get them to a 1. There are people who will tell you what they want is none of your business and what you want is not your problem. This video is nothing more than sizzle masquerading as steak.

  • @ahmedshanti3937
    @ahmedshanti3937 ปีที่แล้ว

    Elon musk hit again

  • @SuperYouthful
    @SuperYouthful 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    BLONDEST, I'd like TO get a CRACK on your project program. Maybe I know how to hustle as an entrepreneur WITH INNOVATIONS that are out of the box to benefit our PROGRAM - which is your BABY...
    You can choose TO MAKE a difference in your PROGRAM with EACH OTHER IN AMERICA.

  • @Bobbbybags
    @Bobbbybags ปีที่แล้ว

    Daymon John is a grifter and a con

  • @LoveDoctorNL
    @LoveDoctorNL 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Another business skill self improvement video. The kind of video I’d like to stay away from.
    Unsubbed

    • @ZivineYT
      @ZivineYT 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Thanks for your input Peter