In one week from Monday, I'll be getting a divorce from a 32 year abusive marriage. I NEVER thought it would happen. So I've been binge watching your videos. How encouraging they have been. Learning how to not be scared to death to move, how to move and have a productive life in spite of being single, is so inspiring. You did the right thing Susan, it was your dream and you accomplished it and how grateful I am you did. Because you are giving us the courage to do the same. Thank you so much and God bless you and Desi!
Congratulations on your bravery and your freedom. It's not easy to leave..but after 32 years, all I can say is you inspire me! It's never too late to be happy...my love and admiration for you, Much love always, Susan & Dez
You’re going to be just fine on your own. No one deserves to be abused. I left a 20 year abusive marriage , 14 years ago. It was the best thing I ever did for myself. I’m keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.
@snuggleb100 I too just got out of a 30 year abusive marriage. I know I did the right thing, but it's still hard and I have a lot of healing to do. I have recently thought about moving. My house is paid off and it's Mine. He walked away. He never truly loved Me. These walls feel like he's still here as well as the trauma. But, buying something smaller might be an option. I'm not sure what I'll do, but I'm not feeling like I can heal unless I leave the memories of all that happened in between these walls. He is over 2K miles away from where I live. I will thankfully never see him again. I am proud of you for getting yourself out and you too will heal in time. God Bless you ❤🙏
I am so proud of you for finding the courage to move forward with your life on a different path. I know how difficult it is to get away from an abusive relationship and how much courage it takes to venture out on your own. At first, it may seem overwhelming, but I promise you, eventually you will be able to take that deep cleansing breath you've been longing for all these years. Do me a favor, give yourself plenty of time before you begin dating again. It's important for you to look into who you are and why you were attracted to this individual in the first place. Once you have a better understanding of yourself, you will have a better chance of finding true happiness in your life, be it alone or with another.
I had been sick, I have a bad knee; but when you recommended to get a pet, I pray for it and God gave me the ok so I rescue a baby Chihuahua his name is Luca and he brought so much life and happiness to my life. I'm so busy with him that I forgot my pain in the knee. Oh! he also can sing too, THANK YOU SUSAN, GOD BLESS YOU!
I'm 49, and 4 months ago, I started a new life. I have no friends and I'm not seeking a relationship. I'm loving myself and my adult sons and daughter. That is all I need. Thank you for you videos, your kind words that sometimes help me thru my rough day. ❤
I, too, at 66, am alone after my husband of 30 some years left me. I've never been on my own. But I'm learning to manage money, navigate the loneliness, praying alot. I'd love to be in a relationship again, so I put myself up for rent on several dating sites. What a disaster that was! Not going there anymore. For now, I'm putting that desire into God's hands. And for now, I'm content. It's time I can take to devote myself to doing for others. I'll be OK. You'll be OK. God bless you, my fearless sisters!
So true - travel friends self care books music theatre opera family dining out and just being curious about the world and your immediate neighbourhood provide so much joy
There is nothing wrong with being alone. We just don’t have any great role models for older women being alone. It’s not weird or abnormal to prioritize yourself. We’re on this planet to learn and grow. That doesn’t necessarily mean spending it with a man.
Starting over after my husband left our marriage and I had to sell my dream home, I moved from one side of Texas to the other side. I had never been away from my family. But I loved the small town and the quiet countryside that reminded me so much of Arkansas...but still in Texas. I found a small church and joined a group of ladies who tended the garden flowers at our historical home and park in our little town. It was my year of healing my tender heart and I needed it to teach me to grow my own garden of hope and simple joys. I grew deeper roots of faith realizing just how much God truly did love me and care about me. I returned to my west Texas family to be a fulltime Nana to a new grandbaby who will soon be 9 yrs old. And, another granddaughter who is 2 yrs old. Today, we sat outside under some lovely shade trees watching the 2 girls splash in the little pool, and brought back memories when I was little, staying with my grandparents sometimes. Simple joys of long hot summers outside, watching the stars at night, and enjoying being with my grandparents in the backyard, with all the flowers and roses, and the sprinkler that sent out glimmers of light like a diamond when the sun was just right. Life keeps going on and much of it we can't control. I helped my grown daughter to buy a large home, and a cottage in the back. I basically stay over on the weekends to do my sewing and give my daughter her own space. I am retired and make a life on Social Security. I consider myself happy and blessed.
I am 57 and been alone for 6 yrs after a 24 yr marriage. I had never been alone since I started dating at 14 yrs old! That's astounding to me now. I didn't know, or forgot, that I am a loner. In my marriage I craved time alone. So I am loving this situation now. I live in my own home which needs total rehab. Since I don't have the money to do all that it needs, I got busy working in the garden. My garden is so beautiful this spring. The plants are tall and flowers everywhere! Unfortunately, I just lost my precious best friend, my furbaby of 12 years; still have 2 other dogs and became an accidental cat lady, feeding a semi-feral colony of 15 or more. It's me and the animals. I sleep well, I have silence, I do what I want, no one is breathing down my neck. It's also the first time I am celibate since 14 yrs old..I am loving it. I intend to be this way for the rest of my life. I have so many things I put off while married. I'm going to work on those things I love.
when happy people move they are happy with where they moved to. When unhappy move they are unhappy with where they are. You take yourself where ever you go
Omg. I read your comment thinking that was my comment. I’ve always said, “you take yourself with you wherever you go.” My mother taught me this and it’s so true.
After 64 years of marriage I became a widow. That was almost 2 years ago. I have never been happier or more content. I would never even consider living with a man or even dating a man. I am 85 years old and plan on enjoying the rest of my life alone. My family, neighbors and friends are I need. Please enjoy your independence.
Yes, thanks for sharing that. I am almost 59 and widowed 8 after 24 yrs. of marriage. I've been helping my adult daughter a lot the last 8 years, but I have made a focus or a priority on taking care of me too, but you know, I think maybe at some level, the only reason why I think I want to date is because I'm a little bit embarrassed of feeling kind of like a misfit when there are so many couples out there and feeling like I'm "supposed" to be in a relationship. So I don't think I should date unless I'm really clear that I want to be in a relationship at all.
@@dig1272 You are still young, If you feel like you would enjoy being in a relationship, then do so, Whatever makes you happy. Life is too short , be happy.
@@jackiewargo9492 We will see! Right now my focus is on finishing my A.S. in Accounting degree so that I can get a decent paying job and support myself better. Calif. is NOT cheap! And this is where my daughter wants to stay and I could never leave her.
I have no advice on moving but I do on starting your life over. You see I lost my 38 year old son to a massive heart attack two years ago. He was my first born of 4. Then on March 18, 2023 I lost my husband to the exact same thing. You see, I got married at 18 and went from my father’s home to ours. I have never lived alone in my entire life. Now at 62, for the first time in my life, I live all alone. It is very hard but I just stay close to God and live each day to the best of my ability. No parent should have to bury their own child but it happens. The hardest part of losing my husband is having to carry that burden alone. But it has taught me one thing and that is to never take anything for granted. Now I enjoy what I do have much more than I ever have! My whole perspective on life has now changed for the better. I have 4 grandkids with the youngest being an 8 year old little boy! I spend as much time as I can with them just loving on them and doing the things they want to do. My three children that I have left mean that much more to me now. I am finding out who I really am for the first time in my life! I guess what I am saying is enjoy your life and don’t sweat the small things. You can do and achieve anything your heart desires. God Bless❤️
I am sorry for the loss of your son and your husband. Very painful to experience two deaths in such a brief span of time. We all go about our days as though all is well enough, never dwelling on all the “ what ifs “, yet knowing anyone can die on any given day. We should always let those we love know how dear they are to us at every opportunity. You are to be admired for not allowing yourself to become lost in grief and forget all about who and what remains. God bless you.
Wise words from a wise woman… my sincere condolences regarding your loss(es). 😢 My sincere admiration for making sweet lemonade from the lemons 🍋 “life” presented. Blessings from the NorthEast
My Mom used to say that older men were looking for a nurse or a purse. I think she was right. You couldn’t give me one on a silver platter now at almost 70. Your house looks so lovely Susan. 💖
I agree! I've been alone now over 5 years after losing my beloved husband of 35 years. We had grown older together from our 20's, and looking around at the "available" men now in their 60's or older, sorry, but no thank you! I'm no oil painting but some of what I've seen would need a complete make over! I'm getting used to living alone and slowly finding who I am after being a wife from age 21, so if someone was to come into my life they'd have to accept me for who I am now warts and all. And definitely NOT thinking me to be the nurse or a purse! 😆
When I worked in nursing homes there was a sign on the hallways that read “ Home is where you lay your head at night”. It’s a mindset to be happy or unhappy wherever you are and whatever circumstance you are in. I choose to be happy.
One of the best videos ever! Congratulations on your 1 year anniversary. It certainly went fast. As usual, you make me think. And some of these comments hit me square in the face. My husband of 45 years died 2 years ago. We had no children and I'm an only child. I'm smack in the place i never wanted to be....alone. Some of the comments uplifted me and gave me a new perspective. I'd been heading to a little dark place, but now I'm having a better outlook. Thank you for always being encouraging and thanks to all the gang for the comments. ❤❤❤❤
I can so relate to your words. I believe I might’ve spoken them. Learned I had a sister (we shared a birth parent) later in life. She is a kind comfort but lives out of state… my daughter & her father (one of my best friends) live across the country… some days are sad but rainbows 🌈 often appear after thunderstorms! One day at a time.🎈
I really dont wish to marry again. I like having my freedom and not being responsible for another person. I can eat what I want for dinner, go where I want to go. I like being able to just be. I really enjoyed decorating my home the way I wanted . My pup and I are happy together. I do love having friends and family over. A job well done, Susan and Desi. Congrats!❤
I had dinner with five girlfriends last night and five of us were widows out of the 6 and not one of us wants to remarry. And I absolutely believe that women do way better than men when they are widowed😊
At 58 I downsized and relocated, that was 10 years ago. It wasn’t easy but it was the right decision. At 62 I was diagnosed with breast cancer, then we had Covid. I’m tired now, the last 6 years were difficult but I learnt so much about myself. I like being alone, I enjoy simple pleasures, my dog, browsing in book shops, reading to my heart’s content, hopping on the train and going places, being kind to myself, which is probably the most important of all these activities. You have a lovely gentle channel Susan. I wish you much success with it. A hug for your little Desi.
Do you have any advice on how to downsize items in storage from selling your home that you were in for 27 years, as an example, which is my case. Do you have any advice about that? I have all these things that belonged to my late parents who passed after my husband in storage. I have stuff from my husband, things that belong to me, all the things that when I sold the house and moved I couldn't just throw them away. They were like my husband's trumpet and my dad's model ships and the hope chest of my parents that had my dad's parents stuff in it and letters. I have my maternal grandmother's hope chest that belonged to my great-great grandmother.It's made out of maple and there's things in there too... And oh my gosh, and all the photo albums, slides, projector, anyway, if you have any advice or know of anybody who has a channel that can really help me get through this stuff. I have to do it this summer. The second part of summer when I don't have any school. I'm going to try to go through the storage, a 10 x 15, and really figure out how to get rid of at least half of it and get a smaller storage facility.
Oh Susan, you are so beautiful and warm, you can have a man in your life if you decide you want one. My mo. Remarried at 76! She had a wonderful man who cherished her till her death at 91. Never say never.
@@dig1272 If you have a relative who would appreciate any of the furniture, ie the hope chests give them away. Perhaps the local high school would like the musical instruments, imagine a student learning how to play the trumpet, wouldn’t that be special! As you say, this is all just stuff. You are the only person it means anything to and the reality is you rarely if ever look at it. It’s all piled into a lock up and you are paying for storage. If you are unable to sell it give it away. When I moved I asked my boys if they wanted anything, neither of them did. I did hold on to some things but over the years I have given lots away. You will feel a heavy load has been lifted from your shoulders when you no longer have possession of this “stuff “. It would be lovely if you could have a garage sale and get rid of it that way,……or advertise a job lot in your local paper. Plan to get rid of everything as long term storage is not a good idea, imagine what you could do with the money you are presently spending on a lock up. As I get older I have found I need less and two to three times a year I clear out the cupboards and donate to my local charity shop. I hope you can find the courage to make all the right decisions, you will feel unburdened and more content when you start the process. Love from Ireland.
@@tennysoneffie6943Thank you for your reply! I have 2 siblings, but now they're all far away. My sister just moved to Florida to be near her oldest daughter and grandchildren. And my sister's youngest is in Hawaii. My brother's family is up North in S.F. area and I'm in SoCal. My daughter has a little tiny apartment I'm helping her pay for. And she has 2 storage facilities from my selling the house out of the blue and she felt pressured.. she didn't have the strength to go through everything. She has a lot of difficulty letting it go. I, on the other hand, have let go mass amounts of items in the process of downsizing from my husband passing, my parents passing after him, and then from selling my house. Your words did help me. I'm just going to go through and pull out everything that isn't sentimental first and figure out what to do and then I'll go through all of my containers of Christmas items and donate the majority of them. And then I'll go through my parents clothes because I kept some because I couldn't fully let go of absolutely everything, but I guess I will have to. It's just hard. I was very close to them. And then I'll sell one of the model ships, and, in that process, I might sell the model ship that I really wish I could keep.It's a beautiful Robert E. Lee that my dad built by hand, I watched him build it... I feel terrible about the walnut hope chest that's probably 200 years old or more and I have these 4 Amish chairs.Those are all from my mother's mother's side...We think they're Amish that are handmaid and that are incredible. I'm thinking maybe I ought to try to find some kind of antique auction situation... Basically everything that's left is a lot of work, but I'll go through everything that I have the least resistance to releasing and then I'll go to the next level of least resistance and then I'll dig into the harder things and just keep going and that's interesting, what you said about your kitchen and how 3 times a year you go through and you donate things. I have a lot of kitchen items themselves I have no room for that I need to just release now that I'm in a tiny place.. As I said, I've been here just over a year and I think now I'm finally emotionally ready to do the next step this summer. Prior to now, it was just too uncomfortable to go into that storage facility and start pulling things out.I'm actually not quite ready, but I'm not going to do it until after my class I'm taking in the first part of the summer when I'll have a whole month to do it after that before school starts in the fall. I don't think I can have a carport sale in my 55+ community.I have to look into that...that's another issue, but I CAN donate things.I've done a lot of that since I moved in.
What's worse than being lonely, is being lonely with the person you're with. That's why I divorced. Also, when involved, one feels that you need to cook, be energetic, participate in love making when you are not in the mood, etc, etc, when all you want to do is to be reading, stay longer at thift stores😂 and what not. Thanks, but no way. This is my time. I dated after my divorce, and even then they needed more attention that I had the time for. Have a good week Susan.
may I suggest that one needs NOT feel like you need to cook, make love etc if you don't want to. That's society defining a marriage, and a young one at that. We get to set the rules and boundaries of new relationships.
My husband died in January after 46 years of marriage. I am 67 years old and I am learning to like being alone. I have two little doggies and each day I get better. Quite honestly I'm embracing my new life but it's taking time😊
I was as optimistic as you about my move 3 years ago. New friends! New experiences! New dates! But it’s a struggle at our age to deal with the energy it takes to re build life…..alone.
I’ve helped care for my mother in law the last couple years because she’s pretty much home bound. One day last summer I said let’s sit on the porch! I had no idea how much she needed that. We enjoyed the fresh air and talked nearly an hour. It did her soul good and blessed my heart because she told everyone about the best day she had! The simplest moments can mean the world to some 🥰
I got divorced after 37.5 year marriage and started my life over at age 60. Toxic marriage; leaving was the best thing I ever did!!! I will not plan on dating again. I have trust issues. I don't feel alone. I was already alone. I had been doing everything myself anyway; no change for me. My X however, was devestated. Oh well. I forgive him but I could not continue with the same same same. I am renting, so I can move! In fact I AM moving again and its nice to look forward.
You are not home, we are pilgrims on our way to our true home. Nice to meet you. You just popped on my feed this evening! I am a disabled veteran, I spent 5 years in the US Navy and now at 67 years old I am a home body, so many aches and pains but I keep at it as much as I can. I enjoy puttering in my yard on a much smaller scale than I did when I was more able bodied. I look forward to Jesus coming, this world is getting unrecognizable. What did we think the end times would look like? God bless 🙏❤️
I am alone with my cats...2 of them. My husband of 49 years is soon to be my ex, that's a weird sound to me! I no longer live in Ohio in our home. I had no choice, but I moved to the wintermosular that we bought to be "snow birds" The modular needed so much work for full time living and it was intimidating. The longer I lived here in the retirement park and the more I put my things around the easier it became. I have a cute little patio and flowers and seating area so I can have my coffee and be at peace. The one thing I am so grateful for is that I have my health. I am alone and I am an introvert and I don't mind that. I know I am ok.
You are correct! I've asked myself this same question many times and my answer was the same as yours. I give 100% in a relationship and found that they only gave 50% . Falling back into old patterns, at this point, would kill me
I am sorry, I just don't get the mindset. No one needs anyone! We need air to breathe, food and water. I am 69 years old and have been alone for many years and don't regret a moment. I have friends and people in my life. That is enough. U have to enjoy your own company. If u have great self esteem, u don't mind being alone. I have watched Susan over the past years and find that in the beginning, she constantly whined abt not having a man. She is still doing the same thing. We need to make our own happiness. No one, not even a man will make us happy. Happiness comes from within ourselves. We need to make our own happiness. Woman need to get that. This woman does not get it. She is still talking abt not having a man. It can b a part of it, but it does not have to b. That is not all there is. It is sad and that is why I stopped watching her videos. I got so tired of her "Poor me" stories.
I made a new friend just today and she lives really close to me. I am really happy. She is the first person to want to learn to crochet and I am going to teach her. I have always thought that I should teach crochet but till now noone seemed interested, I think that this could be a great friendship
Dear Susan, a few weeks ago I said I felt sadder after listening to one of your videos. Today you sound so much happier talking about having moved closer to your family. I have recently purchased a small home in Adelaid's oldest and most beautiful suburbs right between my two sons and their families who I never saw much of while living in a beach suburb a long drive away. My new home is surrounded by beautiful and immaculate old houses with shopping around the corner of my street. My gardens are established and full of fragrant flowers and, I am finally home. I may be alone inside my completely refurbished home but I'm surrounded by beauty and family and peace. Thank you for your uplifting story. ❤ Regards, Emma.
You have created a beautiful environment, in your home. I am 78 a recent widow and going to sell my house soon and move closer to family, with my dachshund Oliver in a Rental apt. There is no family near me. Can you imagine a 78 year old starting a new life, different city and strange surroundings! I am so blessed to have independence. Wish me luck. I am so happy for you. ❤😊
Starting over isn't a new concept and I think women do it best. If you have friends and family nearby you are never alone no matter where you live. Especially with the ways we can communicate through chat apps. Planning gatherings is all part of the celebration of each other. I never felt I needed a man to complete me. Been alone since 1997 yet have a full and rewarding single life at 70. I am rarely lonely.
I'm 68, and I always was in a relationship all my life. One year and a half ago it ended and I try to wrap the idea of giving myself the opportunity again and I always end up with the conclusion that right now I'm feeling and living my best times why try to change that. I have a beautiful family, my freedom, I do as I wish when I wish. I'm active and am always thinking on a new project in the house. I like you love my home and have it beautiful and cozy like yours, but I'm not willing to give up the life I'm living, like the saying says I've been there done that. My perfect scenario would be if anything to meet someone that's wiling to live in his place and me in mine and we share weekends together and do fun things but come Monday be back to my beautiful routine. For the male, that's not acceptable because in their mind with a woman, they have the care they need. You and Desi are living your best life I would not put much thought into it. I've always believed that what's meant in your life will come in without expecting it. Lots of love is going your way ❤💫🙏💖🌟
You are right.I never really thought about the fact that women are way better at starting over than men are!! There's an old man in my 55 plus neighborhood who I spoke with at our local high end restaurant/bar whose wife left him for another man after 34 years of marriage, she moved to another state! And I think he must be 70 or so years old. And he was like sort of hitting on me, not quite sure, and he was like tears down his face and he said he doesn't want to sleep alone. And he's acting like his whole world has ended. You're right. We women have so much more resilience. It's really strange to me, the way he's responding to his situation. I saw him again a month after this went down and he is still devastated. I am really glad I'm a woman.
My moving advice: make friends with your neighbors. Susan, I think your life is wonderful! Do you think that the reason you haven't wanted to marry is that in the last 10 years you've been falling in love with yourself? You have discovered that you are good company, interesting and fun! You don't want to let a man break you up from you! Happy that Desi felt like singing today!
At age 58, I quit my job, packed up my home & moved back to upstate NY from California. I had to drive across the country to get my car & dog there. My oldest son helped me drive. I moved in with my sister for 6mo till I found a job & a house. Nine years later I retired. When my sister retired a couple years later, she moved to South Carolina. In 2018 I sold my house & drove back to California where my kids are, this time my grandson helped me drive. I was married for 22 years & it was not great. I've been on my own for over 30 years. I've done things I didn't know I was capable of doing by myself, like buying cars & houses. I'm with my sons & grandchildren now. God's blessings keep coming. Sure it would have been nice to find love & companionship, but for the most part, I'm content. The Lord has protected & provided. I really don't have a bucket list. I feel so blessed. I have friends & family all across the nation. You don't need a man to feel content, as long as you have friends & God. Bless you & Desi dear friend. I loved your story about your grandson & the raccoon, that made me laugh. By the way, one of my son's name is Devin. Till next week. ❤❤🐾🐾
Susan. You forgot to mention about your dinner party with your 3 friends you hadn't seen in 10 years!! Wasn't that another sweet memory? I guess it's been a month or so ago
Your such a lovely lady with such a lovely life. I understand completely about not wanting to do all those chores again, an become a slave to someone else an possible lose yourself. Your home is beautiful, it's yours to only let in people who value your worth , this way you'll never feel alone. 💙💙💙
I am moving soon. I'm 62. I look forward to downsizing and simplifying. I am donating all my stuff that I don't use to a lady that helps people get their first home/apartment. I made sure the recipients don't have to pay. My heart is full knowing my stuff will help someone else.
I lost my husband nearly 2 years ago, after taking care of him for four years while he was dealing with many health issues. For the first time in 41 years I had found myself alone and I have decided that it is time to take care of me. I bought my first home at the age of 57 and I have enjoyed making this little house my own. I can say with all honesty that I am not interested in finding a significant other at this point in my life. I have great friends that I do things with and I also spend a lot of time with my daughter and granddaughter. I’m alone but definitely not lonely. 🙏🏼❤️✨
I met the love of my life at 44. We were SO Happy together for 15 years. He passed a few years ago. I am a little lost on some days. No friends where I am. Yucky neighbours who want my house. Too young to imagine a future alone but also I know how GREAT a relationship can be so won’t settle. A new man would have to be AMAZING. Ideas are welcome.
I hope we both find love again....I am in same boat as you.....I hope I find a GREAT man ..but I doubt it will ever happen...I am grateful I did have a 20 year marriage to a good guy....then 13 years late a love affair with a very bad man has ruined my life and my trust
At age 70, I too, managed to buy a home and move. It has been the best 9 years ever! My sons and I share this old home and love it so much. This home is old and there is always something to do, or fix, but we do it with love. I have never regretted this move. So, I guess we are alike in our braveness to start over. Congratulations to you and Desi on your one year anniversary! You, too, are so blessed to have made the move! You are not alone, you have Desi. and he is blessed to have you!
Sweet Little Poet, When you talked about changing your life to have a new love in your life, I really identified with that statement. After I was widowed, I re-met an old high school friend again, and we were both lonely and tried to make a life together. At first it was amazing, but I changed so much in my life to make him happy. After a couple of years, I had to let him go because I was giving 90% and he was giving 10%. I'm happy now, still in my family home (41 years) with my sweet dog, feeling blessed every day. This chapter is quiet and calm and comfortable for me, and I'm okay with that. I'm so glad you made the move and have sweet Desi with you. I appreciate our talks every week.
I’m 67 and the last relationship ended in early 2011. I’ve had no desire to lose myself again and it’s so nice to hear you talk about it. Also having to look at myself on whyyyy I can’t seem to get the balance in a relationship. Many answers! Still not ready. Your video is wonderful, Susan. God bless you, Dez and your sweet family.💖💖💖
"You don't have to travel far to be happy where you are." You touched my heart today. Joy comes as small gifts. It's our job to recognize joy when it visits.
I didn't know you are an introvert, as I am, Susan! You seem so outgoing! I am 69, widowed, live alone with my 14 year old Westie. After my hubby passed, I have no real friends, only acquaintances & distant family, both in miles & relationships! I miss the familiar, loving family bond that my spouse & I shared. I would always be comparing a potential partner to him. My only in person contacts are shopping & medical appointments! I have a couple of long term social media friends that I talk to every day.
It's weird to hear you say women will always have to start over. I have never realised that until recently when my partner bof 16 years said I should get my own place....but we will still see each other. I felt like I had been hit with a cricket bat over the head....he said we'll you will have to leave one day.....I knew that but not while we were both alive. 6 months on I'm struggling with this still. I moved 50 miles to where I grew up and my family are and it's near where I work. I had given up or changed a lot for him. I still really love him...I like my small flat but I didn't want any of this.
@@princessdumbarton9877 True....women.outlive men. I think Susan is feeling like "I never thought I would be alone, not married, not growing old together with someone"......... normal !🌹
Susan, I believe that every woman living alone, regardless of age, has days when that sentence I just typed becomes a sudden realization that they truly are alone. It can be overwhelming sometimes, but at the end of the day, it really can be the most precious time to be with only yourself! I know, it doesn’t make sense to me either, but you make my Saturday evenings so much better when I watch your weekly videos! Much love, Susan, you are thriving and it is so evident!!
Fear does a lot to our minds and you have been let down. I am 69 too and I could not put myself into a love relationship that might not work. Time is getting short. I am also an introvert, yet I can also be social, with limits. You live within walking distance to everything and that will be good when you no longer want to drive. You have it made! God Bless, Susan. I love Desi singing his heart out....and smiling too!
You certainly said it well. When there isn’t a team in a marriage, a joint effort whenever possible, it means one always serves the other. For me, it was a burnout after 43 yrs! It killed the love and finally it killed the “Like” as well. It helped me for you to put it in perspective and give it its own language. I’ve had several opportunities to also remarry, and even though for a time it was nice to be noticed, I could not commit for the same reasons you were speaking of. I’m comfortable with me and God and my dog.😊☕️❤️
Your home (happy anniversary) is so beautiful. You've given it all the right touches, and it's so welcoming. Moving was perfect! You look beautiful, too. You and Desi have a great set up! Thank you for being here! ❤
One day we’re all going to be alone. It’s important to be grateful and live in peace, learn to enjoy moments, sometimes with family or friends and many time alone. But if we have God in our life, we’re never truly alone. Staying busy with a hobby or church activities will fill your heart . Being married or having a boyfriend doesn’t guarantee happiness. We need to enjoy every moment and life for today giving thanks.
I so enjoy your posts every week. I moved a year ago too and I’ve been sad. My boys hav there own lives and no grandchildren. Wish I was a neighbor! Keep posting so I feel like you’re my friend.
Hi. Are there no people around you? When you moved did you move closer or further from your boys? Pray about your situation and trust God to open the right doors for you. All of us here would welcome your friendship 😊. God bless you🙏. Stay safe😊😊
We are the same age, and I have outlived two husbands already. I have no intention of even dating. I don't hate men. I just don't want to live with one again. Been there - done that. My father always told me, "Marriage is a bad deal for women," and he was right. I want to be the centerpiece of my own life, and not answer to anyone at all. I'm no longer willing to compromise my own wants and needs. We are the products of our upbringing and a culture that drilled into us that we were not a success unless we got married and raised a family, but that is not true. Having friends and family make my life complete. I don't need "my other half." I am whole person, not just half, and always was. That's what we ladies need to know. And I moved a year ago, also. Best thing I ever did. Glad you are enjoying your life. It's good for Desi, too. I can see that he is happier.
Susan, I can SO totally relate to what you said about why you are alone. I, too, am alone at 74 after being divorced twice and I just cannot find any interest in wanting to devote the rest of my life to another man because I know, just like you said, I would fall back into that routine of catering to his every whim! Why, I don't know? Perhaps the era I was raised in and taught that that's what a good wife is supposed to do, I don't know, but I just don't have the energy or desire to do it again. I, also like you, want to sell my house and move closer to my only child and her family so I hope I can muster up the energy to do that at my age. You seem so happy and that is wonderful! I think you definitely did the right thing by moving closer to your grandchildren.
I was married once for ten years in my youth. Divorced 35 years ago. I have not dated in 14 years. No regrets. I appreciate living alone and taking care of myself. I am a self-employed, senior caregiver in private homes for the past 17 years. Caregiving is my work life, and self-care is an essential part of my personal life. If I don’t take good care of myself, I am no good for anyone else.
Bless you for being a hardworking, loving caregiver!! My mom passed in May 2023...She had SUCH wonderful hospice nurses!!! They made SUCH a difference for me and her!! 💕
I honestly think, that, when you're with someone that's right and good for you, you won't even realise who comes first or second, in your life. I think that it's highly possible, when he's 'the one', you won't feel 'altered', you'll just feel 'added to'.
I think you are right Sarah in many ways. You reminded me of how I felt when folks would say " your baby must be a lot of work" and I would always want to slap them! Yes, it was " work" but that pure love made it feel like the most heavenly glorious work I could ever do...my baby wasn't work. Yesterday I went on a first date with a very nice man...and out of the blue he told me he was looking for a woman who could walk beside him...not behind him..but right with him...and I thought just, wow. Much love, Susan
I love your peaceful videos. My husband just passed away 2 months ago on Valentine’s Day. He was the love of my life I am having a hard time (missing him). Thank you. ❤
After my divorce after 20 year marriage, it was 13-1/2 years before I would allow myself to love again and it was so hard to trust again as well. But I did remarry and this time I married a complete prince. I've been having health problems since having Covid and he has been my everything and by my side all the way. What a special love we truly have. I've never been loved as much as now. God has blessed me tremendously. But there was a time during that 10 years of no man in my life that I thought never again would I even think about being with another man in my life. The hurt was so deep from my previous marriage. But God made a way for me to learn to love again and so life is great and I wish you happiness in however you decide is best for you. Hugs and Love to you.
I love your first memory of a beautiful night with your former husband and grandson and his girlfriend. I love those cherished times with loved ones, where you almost feel like one, organic whole. You are such an amazing person and I thank you for your channel. ❤
My sister is passed away now, but for years her husband would call her after work and ask what she wanted to have for dinner, and he'd get it from a restaurant and bring it home for both of them to eat. - I had to adjust my thinking to even absorb such a loving thing to do. ... I could enjoy that. I'm so tired of cooking mediocre meals and how much time it takes to cook and clean up, for a five minute meal. - ❤️❤️❤️❤️ maybe TAKE TURNS COOKING, or cook together.❤️❤️❤️❤️
I found your channel recently. I have always been alone with my dogs and bought a house at 31. I watched the video the other night where you got Desi and I am so happy he got a human that loves him so much and now he even has a yard to run around in and I have to say your duets are priceless. Love your house the neighborhood looks wonderful.
Of course neighbors count! I have established relationships with neighbors that are from 17 plus years younger to 17 years older. There is such a richness to that. And, as a single woman for now, a sense of security. Desi and you have such a beautiful life. Sharing it makes my life more mindful and beautiful!
I have been widowed for 15 years. I could never totally put into words why I never wanted to marry again. I was 1 month away from my 51st birthday. So not ancient. :) You said it perfectly. I would have to change. I am lonely at times, but not enough to have to rearrange my life that much. Thank you again for your lovely video. I always love them! Blessings ❤
I was married for 48 yrs. and then he passed Now 5years later when asked if I would marry again...why..I've already had the best But really...I've learned I don't want expitations expected of me .... I enjoy my family and their friends and people I meet....I love my life And Susan you have a wonderful beautiful life ❤
I agree. My dear, sweeet husband passed in January. There is absolutely no one who could possibly replace him. And I have no intention of ever trying to find someone. I'm sure he'll be waiting for me on the other side. Both of my adult children and my grandchildren are less than a mile from my home. I'm sandwiched between them. I am content.
I soon will be 71. I have lived alone for 22 years. I was never lucky enough to own a house. So, I made my home where ever I was living, a real home. Home truly is where you hang your hat. I now live with my sister who is disabled and my life has made another turn. Desi doing his little stretches just cracks me up. You truly have been blessed.
Susan,I about spit my coffee as you retold your grandsons raccoon story. They are such gifts to us as grandparents. I never thought your move would be a mistake, as you seem to have lived a life of knowing your heart, but now, you are at the age where your head listens. My grandson and son are 6 minutes down the road and they add so much to our lives, yet we all respect that we have our own lives as well. I adore you, Desi and your thoughtful content. I hope you can know how many women have gathered strength and comfort from you sharing your life so openly. I too am a very friendly introvert and need to work on cultivating more friends, but that is on me. Thank you for your willingness to open up about so much, as so many travel similar roads. Have a beautiful week and give Desi an extra biscuit for singing right on cue! 🎶❤
This video reminded me of David Whyte's poem... The House of Belonging I awoke this morning in the gold light turning this way and that thinking for a moment it was one day like any other. But the veil had gone from my darkened heart and I thought it must have been the quiet candlelight that filled my room, it must have been the first easy rhythm with which I breathed myself to sleep, it must have been the prayer I said speaking to the otherness of the night. And I thought this is the good day you could meet your love, this is the gray day someone close to you could die. This is the day you realize how easily the thread is broken between this world and the next and I found myself sitting up in the quiet pathway of light, the tawny close grained cedar burning round me like fire and all the angels of this housely heaven ascending through the first roof of light the sun has made. This is the bright home in which I live, this is where I ask my friends to come, this is where I want to love all the things it has taken me so long to learn to love. This is the temple of my adult aloneness and I belong to that aloneness as I belong to my life. There is no house like the house of belonging.
My mother taught me, “You take yourself with you wherever you go.” You are a light that shines wherever you are. You light up a room. And incidentally, you’ve created a gorgeous home. Be sure you acknowledge how special you are 💜😊💜
I think you did the best thing for you. Your house is beautiful. Neighborhood friends are fantastic. Desi loves the yard. I love his singing. I heard the voice saying grandma. So sweet and special. And your oldest grandson wanting to spend time talking to you. That is a true blessing. You have done the right thing by moving.
Something you said about being a woman rang ever so true with me. I will never, ever want another husband. I love the one I’ve got , but I do sometimes think, at age 81, that I am tired of the burden of always considering another person in every aspect of my life. It is not a requirement my husband imposes on me, it is my nature. It seems natural , probably because of my role models growing up, that I cook, and do laundry, manage the budget, hire all repairmen, see to the lawn management, have my own car serviced. Never troubling my life partner to do anything that I am perfectly able to do. What new man would be happy with a woman who doesn’t want to accommodate his food preferences, change churches, get to know his children and entertain his extended family in their old tradition ways. No, thank you. I have had all that and it’s been great, but I don’t need or want a repeat with a new cast of characters.
Oh Susan... Thank you for opening your heart and home to us. This has got to be my most favorite glimpse into your life. The beauty of your words, your artist expression captured in your filming and editing, and the way you incorporate them into your decorating is just so inspiring. I admire your boldness in making your move, a defining moment in history that will change your heart forever in so many ways...your family is blessed to have you so nearby. What value you have added to their lives, though I know you'd say the same! Thank you for sharing your talent with us...and Dezi singing is the cherry on the top!❤ Blessings, Cathy❤😊
I was divorced turning 66 it was the most unhappy marriage and i longed to live alone . I met some nice men along the way , but there was nothing that moved me to enter another relationship . I am happy to live alone and i am like you when in another marriage i have to give up what i like to do and my alone time i very much cherish .It may sound selfish , but i already have been there , so i truly do not have to repeat it . Your new House looks great and your beautiful decorations and of course you have a little buddy Desi that loves you unconditional . Keep on praying and be at peace .
I know I'll sound like a broken record but I am just so thankful for you and your videos. I wish it was a two sided relationship but this is our little "friendship" and I'm just going to be grateful for my Sunday afternoons where I can catch up with you and Desi. You both make me so very happy. Thank you for being here for all of us.
You have created the most beautiful home for you and sweet little Desi! Be happy in that knowledge and don't worry. I am alone too and I struggle everyday to pay my bills but I have peace now because I know who I am.
It is wisdom what you are saying. As we age and i am soon to be 74 and it is good to be close to family even if there isn’t a lot of interaction. We can’t put limitations on our lives like not moving etc. We just need to pray of course for the Lord’s guidance. I am a therapist and see trauma survivors. One of the things I tell my clients is it’s about establishing peace in life. It’s all about achieving peace no drama. It is a longer journey for some to arrive at but it is achievable. Victims of trauma have a high tolerance for pain that they don’t deserve. Love you Susan. So grateful for you being a voice of courage and encouragement ❤
Happy Anniversary I just love your home. I have a cozy apt Im alone my fiancee passed 12 years ago and I haven't dated or anything. I have a hard time on Sundays, I'm alone on Sundays, I feel it's a family day and dinner that's how it used to be, but my kids and there families go other places. I just think of old traditions that we don't do anymore, oh well. I enjoy your channel so much God bless and much love 💞
@cindyholt - you're not alone, I too suffer life unpleasantness in similar ways, been divorced for over 25 years and have zero interest in remarrying at age 68, have one daughter, she has decided to not have children, she lives with her boyfriend (they live 30-minutes' drive away) he feels the same way about zero kids. They both stay away from me most of the time, my daughter used to live with me until she reached age 30 but felt the need to move out of my large 2500 sq.ft. house to live with him... so now I have my 10-year-old Havanese dog, my life has become very lonely and a bit dull, I'm thinking to sell my house relocate near other family members and downsize... but I try to make the best of life in the meantime.
Time with you in your videos goes by too fast. Being with you is like being with a dear and lovely friend. Thank you for your words, your thoughts, your wisdom, and just sharing with us what you love and are grateful for. Sending love and hugs.
My sister, who’s in her 70s, just helped me (69) answer my question about relocating last night (Sat) before watching your video today. I wrote down what she said: 1) stay put until all your doctors give you medical clearance that you’re truly well 2) secure new pt-time job to complete tasks already in motion at current home and 3)travel close to home/explore the many towns/states nearby and see if another place feels more like home than where you are living now. Short list, not exciting but objective from a beloved sister who’s seen more than the winds knocked out of my sails. As I watched the daffodils dance in the wind this morning, I felt satisfied with the plan. It’s definitely Spring 🌷and my heart does long for “fun!” 😊 So I will focus on gratitude and take it one day at a time. 🙏🏻 Susan, SO happy you & Desi made the perfect decision for you! You have a lovely home and many special memories from your first year 🎉 Wishing you oodles more, DearFriend! 💕
I got divorced after 14 years of marriage - I matured and he stayed in a marijuana induced state that he promised he would quit after we got married. I tried but I wanted to raise two children, not three! I thought to myself, if love didn’t work why would I want something else? I just stopped looking and moved on and am much happier with just me. My grown children and my grandchildren are who I live for now. They are the joy of my life and I am grateful for everything I have.
People who been smoking marijuana from an age cannot sit. It has altered their brain. I work in home care ans some of the parents can;t keep any thing organizwd including thier lives. Thier homes are in disarray. They have to take a hit if they go out side and when they come inside. They don't work. I doubet they could function on a job. They should have never legalize it.
I moved to S America at age 69 and am the leader of a hot rockin Blues Band..I m 73 now and living my best life ever free of stress and Insanity ! Keep yourselves HEALTHY !
This is my all time favorite video (so far). I was finishing every sentence with you. I just moved last August to my very first home that I bought all by myself-four minutes away from my daughter and her family. All of your concerns were all of my concerns. I also look at the pictures of the house I bought when it was staged and take great pride in how I’ve improved it. Isn’t it satisfying? I can so appreciate all the work you’ve gone to and how much more beautiful that little house is now that’s it’s had your own personal touches. And when you said Now what? I laughed because I finished that sentence with you! And the man thing! Yes! Do I want another man? Do I not want another man? I go back and forth! But oh! How wonderful it is that you understand, Susan. I am sure there are lots and lots of us going through the same thing. Thank you for expressing it so perfectly for all of us!
Desi stretching his legs is beyond cute ❤️ Happy one year anniversary. I moved two years ago into affordable housing after renting rooms for years from so many sometimes abusive people I am happily single and embrace my solitude . I don’t miss a relationship and my self is priority and much healing. Living in the moment is priceless .My apartment is my beautiful safe haven
Well, dear Susan, you really got me this week. I'd been working in my flowerbeds all day, with so many thoughts running through my head. I came in the house to shower and watch your video. I was completely surprised by the exact thoughts you expressed, I'd literally just had. What if something breaks down? What would the expenses be? What if I don't have the strength to do my flowerbeds next year?... What would I do if something happens to my husband of 42 years, and I'm suddenly alone? Things that make you go hummmmmm.... Why is it we exhaust so much energy on things that haven't even happened yet? Perhaps it comes with age. All we can do is take baby steps and one breath at a time. We simply have to meet life as it comes, and enjoy each day to the best of our ability. You should be so proud of yourself and the home & environment YOU have created. Furthermore you did it all without the assistance or influence of a man. You are a loving and caring person, Susan. You reflect that in all you do. Although you have turned down offers from men in the past.....perhaps it was the wrong time. "Mr. Perfect for you" may just be waiting in Big Rapids... So often, love is like a butterfly that lands when you least expect it, and aren't even looking. You'll know when it's right. ❤ Rooting for you always... whatever you decide. Huge hugs from Texas. Deborah P.S. Happy 1st year of your new beautiful life, In your lovely home!
Your words are so beautiful....I worry about things and then when my head is clear...they just seem to slip through my fingers. I wish I knew why I feel so confident things will be ok...but, we women are so strong...and so brave...my love to you! Susan & Desi
❤❤❤❤❤ You ROCK Susan! Always know I'm but a few thousand miles away!! 😂 😂 Ok, now i know you're smiling! However, I really am here when needed. Technology these days...who knew! Rest well, beautiful friend..... until next week. MaWah! ❤
Moving 9 times in 40+ years has taught me that it is important to realize that community is essential. Having a neighborhood, a work family, volunteering and taking care of yourself first is the best way to be a vibrant member of any community. The other thing I have just learned ( or internalized) is that.... you can keep Anything...but you can't keep Everything! It's so easy to overspend and cause yourself to panic when that is the primary way we keep ourselves entertained. But reaching out and finding joy in people...that's where our true treasure lies! You are living proof of that. Your closing phrase about adventure keeping us young is key. Within your energy level and means, find joy in connections! I NEVER THOUGHT I would look forward to seeing a TH-camr every Saturday night...but because of you ...I do!!!🎉 Love to all and a hug and kiss for Desi❤ From fashion to artistry to heart felt conversation...you are the Bomb SASSY Lady!!!😂
I moved the week after I turned 65! Game changer. I did the opposite. I sold my house in a stagnating town for me. I am in Florida and I feel younger! In a fabulous apartment for me and my dog. We walk every day, and there is so much to do. I promised I would grow young in Florida and I am. I do love your home and neighborhood, it works perfect for you. And I love Desi.
I moved 6 months ago, back to somewhere I lived 20+ years ago. Most of my friends from back than have moved or decided to remain friends with my ex instead (their choice not my insistence). So Be It and bless them as they go. I now live right down the street from my sister, and while that's lovely in it's way, I really need to make more new friends that fit with who and how I am now. I'm content alone but need more social outlets is how I see it. Now that the weather's warming I intend to create what I need!🌹
I love living alone, maybe too much.....I sometimes have to force myself to go out to socialize......Im never bored or lonely at home, just content.......I love your house and Big Rapids looks like an amazing place to live! Im glad you are so close to your family.....Love Desi too!! See you next week....( I have to tell you Im thankful for you, last night news broke about Iran attacking Israel.....I was so uneasy but then remembered you post on Saturdays, I watched this video and it calmed and distracted me) pray for Peace....thank you Susan
I'm 61 I love living alone too there's freedom in not having to please another person or hear any noise I couldn't live in Michigan but it's a beautiful place.
Hello, thank you for your channel. I live in London, UK and I look forward to your videos on Saturday night/Sunday morning. I love them. I find your videos so gentle and thought-provoking. It would appear that growing older is a time for deep reflection and trying to be true to your values. Finding joy in the simple things in life - family but ultimately love. Thanks again. ❤❤❤
Congratulations on your one-year anniversary! It's that little voice calling to you in the forest that is the reason you moved. Those grandchildren warm the heart like no other. I'm so glad for you that you feel like you are home.
Oh Susan, you saw the warnings signals and the dangers of self-indulgence! You took a step back and reevaluated your lifestyle. That was the safest way to protect yourself. You went from intensive living to pensive living. Now you live in the moment of thoughtfulness and considerations of self and family. This gives others hope. You are one of the lucky ones. 🕊🕊💗
Hi Susan I lost you for a long while, my phone gave up the ghost, but I am so glad to find you and Desi again, I missed you! I am going through a difficult time in my marriage, I know now, I would never marry again! I don't think it will resolve, but just sitting it out, but you have given me inspiration that I have a future, thank you
"I'm Home ". I love that. I'm originally from Texas grew up in Chicago moved and got married and live in North Carolina. Been married 44 years. And will be living alone for the rest of my remaining life starting at 64. Im 62 now. When you ssid I'm Home i said to my self i know thst feeling. When ever I travel back to Texas to visit family as soon as I cross that Texas border I say , " I'm Home ". My dream is to be Home again. Be blessed Susan , Thank you for being a friend I've never met personally. Moving On Down The Road 🎈
In one week from Monday, I'll be getting a divorce from a 32 year abusive marriage. I NEVER thought it would happen. So I've been binge watching your videos. How encouraging they have been. Learning how to not be scared to death to move, how to move and have a productive life in spite of being single, is so inspiring. You did the right thing Susan, it was your dream and you accomplished it and how grateful I am you did. Because you are giving us the courage to do the same. Thank you so much and God bless you and Desi!
Congratulations on your bravery and your freedom. It's not easy to leave..but after 32 years, all I can say is you inspire me! It's never too late to be happy...my love and admiration for you, Much love always, Susan & Dez
You’re going to be just fine on your own. No one deserves to be abused. I left a 20 year abusive marriage , 14 years ago. It was the best thing I ever did for myself. I’m keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.
@snuggleb100 I too just got out of a 30 year abusive marriage. I know I did the right thing, but it's still hard and I have a lot of healing to do. I have recently thought about moving. My house is paid off and it's Mine. He walked away. He never truly loved Me. These walls feel like he's still here as well as the trauma. But, buying something smaller might be an option. I'm not sure what I'll do, but I'm not feeling like I can heal unless I leave the memories of all that happened in between these walls. He is over 2K miles away from where I live. I will thankfully never see him again.
I am proud of you for getting yourself out and you too will heal in time.
God Bless you ❤🙏
Ladies, why didn't you do it 20 years back? Just curious.
I am so proud of you for finding the courage to move forward with your life on a different path.
I know how difficult it is to get away from an abusive relationship and how much courage it takes to venture out on your own.
At first, it may seem overwhelming, but I promise you, eventually you will be able to take that deep cleansing breath you've been longing for all these years.
Do me a favor, give yourself plenty of time before you begin dating again. It's important for you to look into who you are and why you were attracted to this individual in the first place. Once you have a better understanding of yourself, you will have a better chance of finding true happiness in your life, be it alone or with another.
I had been sick, I have a bad knee; but when you recommended to get a pet, I pray for it and God gave me the ok so I rescue a baby Chihuahua his name is Luca and he brought so much life and happiness to my life. I'm so busy with him that I forgot my pain in the knee. Oh! he also can sing too, THANK YOU SUSAN, GOD BLESS YOU!
That is the best!🤗💕
I need to hear his singing 😊🎶
I'm 49, and 4 months ago, I started a new life. I have no friends and I'm not seeking a relationship. I'm loving myself and my adult sons and daughter. That is all I need. Thank you for you videos, your kind words that sometimes help me thru my rough day. ❤
I, too, at 66, am alone after my husband of 30 some years left me. I've never been on my own. But I'm learning to manage money, navigate the loneliness, praying alot. I'd love to be in a relationship again, so I put myself up for rent on several dating sites. What a disaster that was! Not going there anymore.
For now, I'm putting that desire into God's hands. And for now, I'm content. It's time I can take to devote myself to doing for others. I'll be OK. You'll be OK. God bless you, my fearless sisters!
I was married 30 years, am also 66. I met my bf online, on match, been together 8 years now. I was lucky
"ALONE" that word has a lonesome sad connotation, doesn't it? We just need a better word. We are Independent, Whole, Strong, and Brave!
In reality, we're never alone. We assign that label to ourselves and others erroneously.
After 31 years, at 68, and after a painful divorce of a 25 year marriage, I’m buying a home! 🎉
YES!!!!!!! I am so happy for you!!!
@@LittlePoetthank you so much. I’m a long time fan of yours. Love you and Desi! 💕
Well done! I hope this new chapter in your life brings you much joy.
That's my dream❤
Super impressed and inspired by you!!! 🤩
Just because you are alone, does not mean that you are lonely...
So true - travel friends self care books music theatre opera family dining out and just being curious about the world and your immediate neighbourhood provide so much joy
she is not even alone..she has her son and dil and grandkids....that is not alone....
@@gloriasaliba3395 Solo is wonderful! You can go wherever you want, when you feel like it. You won't hear "No!"
Amen sister… 🤗🤗🤗
It's worse to be alone when you're with someone. Being alone doesn't necessarily mean lonely. As a solo you can sing your own song in any key. Enjoy.
There is nothing wrong with being alone. We just don’t have any great role models for older women being alone. It’s not weird or abnormal to prioritize yourself. We’re on this planet to learn and grow. That doesn’t necessarily mean spending it with a man.
I love the message that started this thread... well said !!!
Perfectly said❤️
Perfectly stated!
💯🙌
We are setting the pace. Live in the light.
Starting over after my husband left our marriage and I had to sell my dream home, I moved from one side of Texas to the other side. I had never been away from my family. But I loved the small town and the quiet countryside that reminded me so much of Arkansas...but still in Texas. I found a small church and joined a group of ladies who tended the garden flowers at our historical home and park in our little town. It was my year of healing my tender heart and I needed it to teach me to grow my own garden of hope and simple joys. I grew deeper roots of faith realizing just how much God truly did love me and care about me. I returned to my west Texas family to be a fulltime Nana to a new grandbaby who will soon be 9 yrs old. And, another granddaughter who is 2 yrs old. Today, we sat outside under some lovely shade trees watching the 2 girls splash in the little pool, and brought back memories when I was little, staying with my grandparents sometimes. Simple joys of long hot summers outside, watching the stars at night, and enjoying being with my grandparents in the backyard, with all the flowers and roses, and the sprinkler that sent out glimmers of light like a diamond when the sun was just right. Life keeps going on and much of it we can't control. I helped my grown daughter to buy a large home, and a cottage in the back. I basically stay over on the weekends to do my sewing and give my daughter her own space. I am retired and make a life on Social Security. I consider myself happy and blessed.
You are truly blessed! Your description of spending time with your grandchildren took me back to my own childhood summers. Beautiful!
I am 57 and been alone for 6 yrs after a 24 yr marriage. I had never been alone since I started dating at 14 yrs old! That's astounding to me now. I didn't know, or forgot, that I am a loner. In my marriage I craved time alone. So I am loving this situation now. I live in my own home which needs total rehab. Since I don't have the money to do all that it needs, I got busy working in the garden. My garden is so beautiful this spring. The plants are tall and flowers everywhere! Unfortunately, I just lost my precious best friend, my furbaby of 12 years; still have 2 other dogs and became an accidental cat lady, feeding a semi-feral colony of 15 or more. It's me and the animals. I sleep well, I have silence, I do what I want, no one is breathing down my neck. It's also the first time I am celibate since 14 yrs old..I am loving it. I intend to be this way for the rest of my life. I have so many things I put off while married. I'm going to work on those things I love.
Bless you hon
Your story sounds quite like my story.
❤ happy being my true genuine self now single!!
God bless your sweetheart, for taking beautiful care of them semi Feral cats. You wonderful soul,
All my love ❤from Liverpool England xxxx
@@christinaboulton9049 Thank you, kindred soul. God Bless you too!
when happy people move they are happy with where they moved to. When unhappy move they are unhappy with where they are. You take yourself where ever you go
thersagardner4781 You are so right! I also feel happy people single will be happy people married.
Wonderful thought!!!
How true !
Omg. I read your comment thinking that was my comment. I’ve always said, “you take yourself with you wherever you go.” My mother taught me this and it’s so true.
Yes! You carry your karma in your suitcase
After 64 years of marriage I became a widow. That was almost 2 years ago. I have never been happier or more content. I would never even consider living with a man or even dating a man. I am 85 years old and plan on enjoying the rest of my life alone. My family, neighbors and friends are I need. Please enjoy your independence.
Yes, thanks for sharing that. I am almost 59 and widowed 8 after 24 yrs. of marriage. I've been helping my adult daughter a lot the last 8 years, but I have made a focus or a priority on taking care of me too, but you know, I think maybe at some level, the only reason why I think I want to date is because I'm a little bit embarrassed of feeling kind of like a misfit when there are so many couples out there and feeling like I'm "supposed" to be in a relationship. So I don't think I should date unless I'm really clear that I want to be in a relationship at all.
@@dig1272 You are still young, If you feel like you would enjoy being in a relationship, then do so, Whatever makes you happy. Life is too short , be happy.
@@jackiewargo9492 We will see! Right now my focus is on finishing my A.S. in Accounting degree so that I can get a decent paying job and support myself better. Calif. is NOT cheap! And this is where my daughter wants to stay and I could never leave her.
@@dig1272 trust me there are plenty of guys out there that DONT want a relationship they just want hook ups....
Aha! Congratulations!
I have no advice on moving but I do on starting your life over. You see I lost my 38 year old son to a massive heart attack two years ago. He was my first born of 4. Then on March 18, 2023 I lost my husband to the exact same thing. You see, I got married at 18 and went from my father’s home to ours. I have never lived alone in my entire life. Now at 62, for the first time in my life, I live all alone. It is very hard but I just stay close to God and live each day to the best of my ability. No parent should have to bury their own child but it happens. The hardest part of losing my husband is having to carry that burden alone. But it has taught me one thing and that is to never take anything for granted. Now I enjoy what I do have much more than I ever have! My whole perspective on life has now changed for the better. I have 4 grandkids with the youngest being an 8 year old little boy! I spend as much time as I can with them just loving on them and doing the things they want to do. My three children that I have left mean that much more to me now. I am finding out who I really am for the first time in my life! I guess what I am saying is enjoy your life and don’t sweat the small things. You can do and achieve anything your heart desires. God Bless❤️
So sorry for you losses May God bless their souls & always be by your side 🙏❤️
@@maryabdel-malik656 Thank you so much❤️
I am sorry for the loss of your son and your husband. Very painful to experience two deaths in such a brief span of time. We all go about our days as though all is well enough, never dwelling on all the “ what ifs “, yet knowing anyone can die on any given day. We should always let those we love know how dear they are to us at every opportunity. You are to be admired for not allowing yourself to become lost in grief and forget all about who and what remains. God bless you.
Wise words from a wise woman… my sincere condolences regarding your loss(es). 😢 My sincere admiration for making sweet lemonade from the lemons 🍋 “life” presented. Blessings from the NorthEast
I love to hear stories like this!! You are an inspiration!! ❤
My Mom used to say that older men were looking for a nurse or a purse. I think she was right. You couldn’t give me one on a silver platter now at almost 70. Your house looks so lovely Susan. 💖
Hear! Hear! I don’t want a new man even on a platter either. He will come with expectations I don’t wish to fulfill.
I agree! I've been alone now over 5 years after losing my beloved husband of 35 years. We had grown older together from our 20's, and looking around at the "available" men now in their 60's or older, sorry, but no thank you! I'm no oil painting but some of what I've seen would need a complete make over! I'm getting used to living alone and slowly finding who I am after being a wife from age 21, so if someone was to come into my life they'd have to accept me for who I am now warts and all. And definitely NOT thinking me to be the nurse or a purse! 😆
Haaaa!!
Your Mom was a very smart lady!
Amen!
My number 1 thing I think I loved most is watching Desi playing in his own backyard for the first time ❤
Yes! Just the cutest thing - he was so proud and happy!❤
Same here.
Absolutely! King of the Yard! 💖🐾💖
When I worked in nursing homes there was a sign on the hallways that read “ Home is where you lay your head at night”. It’s a mindset to be happy or unhappy wherever you are and whatever circumstance you are in. I choose to be happy.
God bless you, I know that you are right
Your filming, editing and skills speaking your story are top notched. Love seeing Desi in Desi land
So true! Beautiful story!
God bless You ...at 61 and ending a 35 year marriage...You give me hope 😮
Agree
One of the best videos ever! Congratulations on your 1 year anniversary. It certainly went fast. As usual, you make me think. And some of these comments hit me square in the face. My husband of 45 years died 2 years ago. We had no children and I'm an only child. I'm smack in the place i never wanted to be....alone. Some of the comments uplifted me and gave me a new perspective. I'd been heading to a little dark place, but now I'm having a better outlook. Thank you for always being encouraging and thanks to all the gang for the comments. ❤❤❤❤
I can so relate to your words. I believe I might’ve spoken them. Learned I had a sister (we shared a birth parent) later in life. She is a kind comfort but lives out of state… my daughter & her father (one of my best friends) live across the country… some days are sad but rainbows 🌈 often appear after thunderstorms! One day at a time.🎈
I really dont wish to marry again. I like having my freedom and not being responsible for another person. I can eat what I want for dinner, go where I want to go. I like being able to just be. I really enjoyed decorating my home the way I wanted . My pup and I are happy together. I do love having friends and family over. A job well done, Susan and Desi. Congrats!❤
I had dinner with five girlfriends last night and five of us were widows out of the 6 and not one of us wants to remarry. And I absolutely believe that women do way better than men when they are widowed😊
Me too!
At 58 I downsized and relocated, that was 10 years ago. It wasn’t easy but it was the right decision. At 62 I was diagnosed with breast cancer, then we had Covid. I’m tired now, the last 6 years were difficult but I learnt so much about myself. I like being alone, I enjoy simple pleasures, my dog, browsing in book shops, reading to my heart’s content, hopping on the train and going places, being kind to myself, which is probably the most important of all these activities.
You have a lovely gentle channel Susan. I wish you much success with it. A hug for your little Desi.
Sending you Love from southern England xxx
Do you have any advice on how to downsize items in storage from selling your home that you were in for 27 years, as an example, which is my case. Do you have any advice about that? I have all these things that belonged to my late parents who passed after my husband in storage. I have stuff from my husband, things that belong to me, all the things that when I sold the house and moved I couldn't just throw them away. They were like my husband's trumpet and my dad's model ships and the hope chest of my parents that had my dad's parents stuff in it and letters. I have my maternal grandmother's hope chest that belonged to my great-great grandmother.It's made out of maple and there's things in there too... And oh my gosh, and all the photo albums, slides, projector, anyway, if you have any advice or know of anybody who has a channel that can really help me get through this stuff. I have to do it this summer. The second part of summer when I don't have any school. I'm going to try to go through the storage, a 10 x 15, and really figure out how to get rid of at least half of it and get a smaller storage facility.
Oh Susan, you are so beautiful and warm, you can have a man in your life if you decide you want one. My mo. Remarried at 76! She had a wonderful man who cherished her till her death at 91. Never say never.
@@dig1272 If you have a relative who would appreciate any of the furniture, ie the hope chests give them away. Perhaps the local high school would like the musical instruments, imagine a student learning how to play the trumpet, wouldn’t that be special!
As you say, this is all just stuff. You are the only person it means anything to and the reality is you rarely if ever look at it. It’s all piled into a lock up and you are paying for storage. If you are unable to sell it give it away. When I moved I asked my boys if they wanted anything, neither of them did. I did hold on to some things but over the years I have given lots away. You will feel a heavy load has been lifted from your shoulders when you no longer have possession of this “stuff “.
It would be lovely if you could have a garage sale and get rid of it that way,……or advertise a job lot in your local paper. Plan to get rid of everything as long term storage is not a good idea, imagine what you could do with the money you are presently spending on a lock up.
As I get older I have found I need less and two to three times a year I clear out the cupboards and donate to my local charity shop.
I hope you can find the courage to make all the right decisions, you will feel unburdened and more content when you start the process.
Love from Ireland.
@@tennysoneffie6943Thank you for your reply! I have 2 siblings, but now they're all far away. My sister just moved to Florida to be near her oldest daughter and grandchildren. And my sister's youngest is in Hawaii. My brother's family is up North in S.F. area and I'm in SoCal. My daughter has a little tiny apartment I'm helping her pay for. And she has 2 storage facilities from my selling the house out of the blue and she felt pressured.. she didn't have the strength to go through everything. She has a lot of difficulty letting it go. I, on the other hand, have let go mass amounts of items in the process of downsizing from my husband passing, my parents passing after him, and then from selling my house. Your words did help me. I'm just going to go through and pull out everything that isn't sentimental first and figure out what to do and then I'll go through all of my containers of Christmas items and donate the majority of them. And then I'll go through my parents clothes because I kept some because I couldn't fully let go of absolutely everything, but I guess I will have to. It's just hard. I was very close to them. And then I'll sell one of the model ships, and, in that process, I might sell the model ship that I really wish I could keep.It's a beautiful Robert E. Lee that my dad built by hand, I watched him build it... I feel terrible about the walnut hope chest that's probably 200 years old or more and I have these 4 Amish chairs.Those are all from my mother's mother's side...We think they're Amish that are handmaid and that are incredible. I'm thinking maybe I ought to try to find some kind of antique auction situation...
Basically everything that's left is a lot of work, but I'll go through everything that I have the least resistance to releasing and then I'll go to the next level of least resistance and then I'll dig into the harder things and just keep going and that's interesting, what you said about your kitchen and how 3 times a year you go through and you donate things. I have a lot of kitchen items themselves I have no room for that I need to just release now that I'm in a tiny place.. As I said, I've been here just over a year and I think now I'm finally emotionally ready to do the next step this summer. Prior to now, it was just too uncomfortable to go into that storage facility and start pulling things out.I'm actually not quite ready, but I'm not going to do it until after my class I'm taking in the first part of the summer when I'll have a whole month to do it after that before school starts in the fall.
I don't think I can have a carport sale in my 55+ community.I have to look into that...that's another issue, but I CAN donate things.I've done a lot of that since I moved in.
What's worse than being lonely, is being lonely with the person you're with. That's why I divorced. Also, when involved, one feels that you need to cook, be energetic, participate in love making when you are not in the mood, etc, etc, when all you want to do is to be reading, stay longer at thift stores😂 and what not. Thanks, but no way. This is my time. I dated after my divorce, and even then they needed more attention that I had the time for. Have a good week Susan.
Susan brought up a good point about cooking and such for them. That's what I'd revert back to, but time to put me first.
may I suggest that one needs NOT feel like you need to cook, make love etc if you don't want to. That's society defining a marriage, and a young one at that. We get to set the rules and boundaries of new relationships.
My husband died in January after 46 years of marriage. I am 67 years old and I am learning to like being alone. I have two little doggies and each day I get better. Quite honestly I'm embracing my new life but it's taking time😊
I was as optimistic as you about my move 3 years ago. New friends! New experiences! New dates! But it’s a struggle at our age to deal with the energy it takes to re build life…..alone.
I’ve helped care for my mother in law the last couple years because she’s pretty much home bound. One day last summer I said let’s sit on the porch! I had no idea how much she needed that. We enjoyed the fresh air and talked nearly an hour. It did her soul good and blessed my heart because she told everyone about the best day she had! The simplest moments can mean the world to some 🥰
We do that at nursing homes. They love it. Just sit around and talk, tell the administration that it is a necessity. Schedule time in for visiting.
❤
I got divorced after 37.5 year marriage and started my life over at age 60. Toxic marriage; leaving was the best thing I ever did!!! I will not plan on dating again. I have trust issues. I don't feel alone. I was already alone. I had been doing everything myself anyway; no change for me. My X however, was devestated. Oh well. I forgive him but I could not continue with the same same same. I am renting, so I can move! In fact I AM moving again and its nice to look forward.
You are not home, we are pilgrims on our way to our true home. Nice to meet you. You just popped on my feed this evening! I am a disabled veteran, I spent 5 years in the US Navy and now at 67 years old I am a home body, so many aches and pains but I keep at it as much as I can. I enjoy puttering in my yard on a much smaller scale than I did when I was more able bodied. I look forward to Jesus coming, this world is getting unrecognizable. What did we think the end times would look like? God bless 🙏❤️
A very happy weekend to you, Susan
I am alone with my cats...2 of them. My husband of 49 years is soon to be my ex, that's a weird sound to me! I no longer live in Ohio in our home. I had no choice, but I moved to the wintermosular that we bought to be "snow birds"
The modular needed so much work for full time living and it was intimidating. The longer I lived here in the retirement park and the more I put my things around the easier it became. I have a cute little patio and flowers and seating area so I can have my coffee and be at peace. The one thing I am so grateful for is that I have my health. I am alone and I am an introvert and I don't mind that. I know I am ok.
Your own space and being at peace. Beautiful ❤
I'm the same. Enjoy your pets.
How much is your lot rent and HOA ?
why do you ask?
You are correct! I've asked myself this same question many times and my answer was the same as yours. I give 100% in a relationship and found that they only gave 50% . Falling back into old patterns, at this point, would kill me
💯 PERCENT TRUTH!
Tienes toda la razón.
I am sorry, I just don't get the mindset. No one needs anyone! We need air to breathe, food and water. I am 69 years old and have been alone for many years and don't regret a moment. I have friends and people in my life. That is enough. U have to enjoy your own company. If u have great self esteem, u don't mind being alone. I have watched Susan over the past years and find that in the beginning, she constantly whined abt not having a man. She is still doing the same thing. We need to make our own happiness. No one, not even a man will make us happy. Happiness comes from within ourselves. We need to make our own happiness. Woman need to get that. This woman does not get it. She is still talking abt not having a man. It can b a part of it, but it does not have to b. That is not all there is. It is sad and that is why I stopped watching her videos. I got so tired of her "Poor me" stories.
@@sandracoleman2743 You stop watching her videos? obviously not! You sound very bitter and little jealous of Susan who has a happy life.
Yes, I stopped watching and decided to check and see if things had changed for her. Obviously not. It is sad. Bitter? That is amusing...
Who could ever be sad with that adorable dog? He is just an absolute joy.❤
I made a new friend just today and she lives really close to me. I am really happy. She is the first person to want to learn to crochet and I am going to teach her. I have always thought that I should teach crochet but till now noone seemed interested, I think that this could be a great friendship
I'm very happy for you!
I'm so happy for you 😊
Dear Susan, a few weeks ago I said I felt sadder after listening to one of your videos. Today you sound so much happier talking about having moved closer to your family. I have recently purchased a small home in Adelaid's oldest and most beautiful suburbs right between my two sons and their families who I never saw much of while living in a beach suburb a long drive away. My new home is surrounded by beautiful and immaculate old houses with shopping around the corner of my street. My gardens are established and full of fragrant flowers and, I am finally home. I may be alone inside my completely refurbished home but I'm surrounded by beauty and family and peace. Thank you for your uplifting story. ❤ Regards, Emma.
It all sounds beautiful Emma!
Lovely, tender comment!
I never had a relationship with a man where he didn’t take more than he gave. And what I gave was never enough. 😢
Seems like a good match then!
You have created a beautiful environment, in your home. I am 78 a recent widow and going to sell my house soon and move closer to family, with my dachshund Oliver in a Rental apt. There is no family near me. Can you imagine a 78 year old starting a new life, different city and strange surroundings! I am so blessed to have independence. Wish me luck. I am so happy for you. ❤😊
Good luck to you and Oliver. We women are stronger than we realize. I believe you can do it! ❤
Good luck. I hope that you have some help moving.
Me too .am 76 and want to move back to my home town..will hve to rent and am scared too but trusting in God .
Starting over isn't a new concept and I think women do it best. If you have friends and family nearby you are never alone no matter where you live. Especially with the ways we can communicate through chat apps. Planning gatherings is all part of the celebration of each other. I never felt I needed a man to complete me. Been alone since 1997 yet have a full and rewarding single life at 70. I am rarely lonely.
Well said!
I'm 68, and I always was in a relationship all my life. One year and a half ago it ended and I try to wrap the idea of giving myself the opportunity again and I always end up with the conclusion that right now I'm feeling and living my best times why try to change that. I have a beautiful family, my freedom, I do as I wish when I wish. I'm active and am always thinking on a new project in the house. I like you love my home and have it beautiful and cozy like yours, but I'm not willing to give up the life I'm living, like the saying says I've been there done that. My perfect scenario would be if anything to meet someone that's wiling to live in his place and me in mine and we share weekends together and do fun things but come Monday be back to my beautiful routine. For the male, that's not acceptable because in their mind with a woman, they have the care they need. You and Desi are living your best life I would not put much thought into it. I've always believed that what's meant in your life will come in without expecting it. Lots of love is going your way ❤💫🙏💖🌟
@@maggiecamps6790 I absolutely agree with you.
You are right.I never really thought about the fact that women are way better at starting over than men are!! There's an old man in my 55 plus neighborhood who I spoke with at our local high end restaurant/bar whose wife left him for another man after 34 years of marriage, she moved to another state! And I think he must be 70 or so years old. And he was like sort of hitting on me, not quite sure, and he was like tears down his face and he said he doesn't want to sleep alone. And he's acting like his whole world has ended. You're right. We women have so much more resilience. It's really strange to me, the way he's responding to his situation. I saw him again a month after this went down and he is still devastated. I am really glad I'm a woman.
My moving advice: make friends with your neighbors. Susan, I think your life is wonderful! Do you think that the reason you haven't wanted to marry is that in the last 10 years you've been falling in love with yourself? You have discovered that you are good company, interesting and fun! You don't want to let a man break you up from you! Happy that Desi felt like singing today!
At age 58, I quit my job, packed up my home & moved back to upstate NY from California. I had to drive across the country to get my car & dog there. My oldest son helped me drive. I moved in with my sister for 6mo till I found a job & a house. Nine years later I retired. When my sister retired a couple years later, she moved to South Carolina. In 2018 I sold my house & drove back to California where my kids are, this time my grandson helped me drive. I was married for 22 years & it was not great. I've been on my own for over 30 years. I've done things I didn't know I was capable of doing by myself, like buying cars & houses. I'm with my sons & grandchildren now. God's blessings keep coming. Sure it would have been nice to find love & companionship, but for the most part, I'm content. The Lord has protected & provided. I really don't have a bucket list. I feel so blessed. I have friends & family all across the nation. You don't need a man to feel content, as long as you have friends & God. Bless you & Desi dear friend. I loved your story about your grandson & the raccoon, that made me laugh. By the way, one of my son's name is Devin. Till next week. ❤❤🐾🐾
Susan. You forgot to mention about your dinner party with your 3 friends you hadn't seen in 10 years!! Wasn't that another sweet memory? I guess it's been a month or so ago
If a person feels they made a mistake moving they can always go back. Right? At least you tried
You are very blessed and positive.😊❤
Your such a lovely lady with such a lovely life.
I understand completely about not wanting to do all those chores again, an become a slave to someone else an possible lose yourself.
Your home is beautiful, it's yours to only let in people who value your worth , this way you'll never feel alone.
💙💙💙
I am moving soon. I'm 62. I look forward to downsizing and simplifying. I am donating all my stuff that I don't use to a lady that helps people get their first home/apartment. I made sure the recipients don't have to pay. My heart is full knowing my stuff will help someone else.
How kind of you ❤ A kindred spirit which forms the heart of our community😊
I lost my husband nearly 2 years ago, after taking care of him for four years while he was dealing with many health issues. For the first time in 41 years I had found myself alone and I have decided that it is time to take care of me. I bought my first home at the age of 57 and I have enjoyed making this little house my own. I can say with all honesty that I am not interested in finding a significant other at this point in my life. I have great friends that I do things with and I also spend a lot of time with my daughter and granddaughter. I’m alone but definitely not lonely. 🙏🏼❤️✨
I met the love of my life at 44. We were SO Happy together for 15 years. He passed a few years ago. I am a little lost on some days. No friends where I am. Yucky neighbours who want my house. Too young to imagine a future alone but also I know how GREAT a relationship can be so won’t settle. A new man would have to be AMAZING. Ideas are welcome.
I hope we both find love again....I am in same boat as you.....I hope I find a GREAT man ..but I doubt it will ever happen...I am grateful I did have a 20 year marriage to a good guy....then 13 years late a love affair with a very bad man has ruined my life and my trust
At age 70, I too, managed to buy a home and move. It has been the best 9 years ever! My sons and I share this old home and love it so much. This home is old and there is always something to do, or fix, but we do it with love. I have never
regretted this move. So, I guess we are alike in our braveness to start over. Congratulations to you and Desi on your one
year anniversary! You, too, are so blessed to have made the move! You are not alone, you have Desi. and he is blessed to have you!
How old are your sons....
you are blessed you have your son in your home and in your life......
You're lucky to have your sons.
Sweet Little Poet, When you talked about changing your life to have a new love in your life, I really identified with that statement. After I was widowed, I re-met an old high school friend again, and we were both lonely and tried to make a life together. At first it was amazing, but I changed so much in my life to make him happy. After a couple of years, I had to let him go because I was giving 90% and he was giving 10%. I'm happy now, still in my family home (41 years) with my sweet dog, feeling blessed every day. This chapter is quiet and calm and comfortable for me, and I'm okay with that. I'm so glad you made the move and have sweet Desi with you. I appreciate our talks every week.
Beautiful story and amazing lesson learned...you touched my heart. 90% is too high of a price to pay...much love, Susan & Desi
What a lovely and thoughtful comment. I like that you're content and it's 'enough'. I always prayed for 'enough'.
I'm glad you still have your home 🏠❤️
I’m 67 and the last relationship ended in early 2011. I’ve had no desire to lose myself again and it’s so nice to hear you talk about it. Also having to look at myself on whyyyy I can’t seem to get the balance in a relationship. Many answers! Still not ready. Your video is wonderful, Susan. God bless you, Dez and your sweet family.💖💖💖
"You don't have to travel far to be happy where you are." You touched my heart today. Joy comes as small gifts. It's our job to recognize joy when it visits.
I didn't know you are an introvert, as I am, Susan! You seem so outgoing! I am 69, widowed, live alone with my 14 year old Westie. After my hubby passed, I have no real friends, only acquaintances & distant family, both in miles & relationships! I miss the familiar, loving family bond that my spouse & I shared. I would always be comparing a potential partner to him. My only in person contacts are shopping & medical appointments! I have a couple of long term social media friends that I talk to every day.
We introverts need to stick together!!!
Women have always had to start over at some point in their lives...stay strong💖
Here, here ! 🍷🍝. 🕯🕯
Millions are divorced and widowed. The majority of women will be widows and end up alone. It's not like this is a new or unusual thing.
It's weird to hear you say women will always have to start over. I have never realised that until recently when my partner bof 16 years said I should get my own place....but we will still see each other. I felt like I had been hit with a cricket bat over the head....he said we'll you will have to leave one day.....I knew that but not while we were both alive. 6 months on I'm struggling with this still. I moved 50 miles to where I grew up and my family are and it's near where I work. I had given up or changed a lot for him. I still really love him...I like my small flat but I didn't want any of this.
@@princessdumbarton9877 True....women.outlive men. I think Susan is feeling like "I never thought I would be alone, not married, not growing old together with someone"......... normal !🌹
Susan, I believe that every woman living alone, regardless of age, has days when that sentence I just typed becomes a sudden realization that they truly are alone. It can be overwhelming sometimes, but at the end of the day, it really can be the most precious time to be with only yourself! I know, it doesn’t make sense to me either, but you make my Saturday evenings so much better when I watch your weekly videos! Much love, Susan, you are thriving and it is so evident!!
Amen!! ❤
I think God knew in these last days many women will end up living alone. Social media helps but He is only a prayer away. He is coming soon.
@@user-oo8ei4lj6s I agree!
Fear does a lot to our minds and you have been let down. I am 69 too and I could not put myself into a love relationship that might not work. Time is getting short. I am also an introvert, yet I can also be social, with limits. You live within walking distance to everything and that will be good when you no longer want to drive. You have it made! God Bless, Susan. I love Desi singing his heart out....and smiling too!
You certainly said it well. When there isn’t a team in a marriage, a joint effort whenever possible, it means one always serves the other. For me, it was a burnout after 43 yrs! It killed the love and finally it killed the “Like” as well. It helped me for you to put it in perspective and give it its own language. I’ve had several opportunities to also remarry, and even though for a time it was nice to be noticed, I could not commit for the same reasons you were speaking of. I’m comfortable with me and God and my dog.😊☕️❤️
Your home (happy anniversary) is so beautiful. You've given it all the right touches, and it's so welcoming. Moving was perfect! You look beautiful, too. You and Desi have a great set up! Thank you for being here! ❤
Gosh you are so kind! Thank you so much for being here! Happy weekend to you! Susan & Desi
@@LittlePoet ❤️
One day we’re all going to be alone. It’s important to be grateful and live in peace, learn to enjoy moments, sometimes with family or friends and many time alone. But if we have God in our life, we’re never truly alone. Staying busy with a hobby or church activities will fill your heart . Being married or having a boyfriend doesn’t guarantee happiness. We need to enjoy every moment and life for today giving thanks.
I so enjoy your posts every week. I moved a year ago too and I’ve been sad. My boys hav there own lives and no grandchildren. Wish I was a neighbor! Keep posting so I feel like you’re my friend.
Hi. Are there no people around you? When you moved did you move closer or further from your boys? Pray about your situation and trust God to open the right doors for you. All of us here would welcome your friendship 😊. God bless you🙏. Stay safe😊😊
We are the same age, and I have outlived two husbands already. I have no intention of even dating. I don't hate men. I just don't want to live with one again. Been there - done that. My father always told me, "Marriage is a bad deal for women," and he was right. I want to be the centerpiece of my own life, and not answer to anyone at all. I'm no longer willing to compromise my own wants and needs. We are the products of our upbringing and a culture that drilled into us that we were not a success unless we got married and raised a family, but that is not true. Having friends and family make my life complete. I don't need "my other half." I am whole person, not just half, and always was. That's what we ladies need to know. And I moved a year ago, also. Best thing I ever did. Glad you are enjoying your life. It's good for Desi, too. I can see that he is happier.
Loved everything you said.
Amen to that!! I could not agree more!❤
Love this comment, so true!
Susan, I can SO totally relate to what you said about why you are alone. I, too, am alone at 74 after being divorced twice and I just cannot find any interest in wanting to devote the rest of my life to another man because I know, just like you said, I would fall back into that routine of catering to his every whim! Why, I don't know? Perhaps the era I was raised in and taught that that's what a good wife is supposed to do, I don't know, but I just don't have the energy or desire to do it again. I, also like you, want to sell my house and move closer to my only child and her family so I hope I can muster up the energy to do that at my age. You seem so happy and that is wonderful! I think you definitely did the right thing by moving closer to your grandchildren.
If you can afford it, hire help with the packing. That will conserve your energy.
@@jeanetteh.9240 Yes, that's a great idea!
I was married once for ten years in my youth. Divorced 35 years ago. I have not dated in 14 years. No regrets. I appreciate living alone and taking care of myself. I am a self-employed, senior caregiver in private homes for the past 17 years. Caregiving is my work life, and self-care is an essential part of my personal life. If I don’t take good care of myself, I am no good for anyone else.
Bless you for being a hardworking, loving caregiver!! My mom passed in May 2023...She had SUCH wonderful hospice nurses!!! They made SUCH a difference for me and her!! 💕
Desi crack's me up every time he gets that docile look when you hold him. "And wow he sings too!"😂
I honestly think, that, when you're with someone that's right and good for you, you won't even realise who comes first or second, in your life. I think that it's highly possible, when he's 'the one', you won't feel 'altered', you'll just feel 'added to'.
I think you are right Sarah in many ways. You reminded me of how I felt when folks would say " your baby must be a lot of work" and I would always want to slap them! Yes, it was " work" but that pure love made it feel like the most heavenly glorious work I could ever do...my baby wasn't work. Yesterday I went on a first date with a very nice man...and out of the blue he told me he was looking for a woman who could walk beside him...not behind him..but right with him...and I thought just, wow. Much love, Susan
@@LittlePoet Give it time. I hope that he stays that way.
I love your peaceful videos. My husband just passed away 2 months ago on Valentine’s Day. He was the love of my life I am having a hard time (missing him). Thank you. ❤
After my divorce after 20 year marriage, it was 13-1/2 years before I would allow myself to love again and it was so hard to trust again as well. But I did remarry and this time I married a complete prince. I've been having health problems since having Covid and he has been my everything and by my side all the way. What a special love we truly have. I've never been loved as much as now. God has blessed me tremendously. But there was a time during that 10 years of no man in my life that I thought never again would I even think about being with another man in my life. The hurt was so deep from my previous marriage. But God made a way for me to learn to love again and so life is great and I wish you happiness in however you decide is best for you. Hugs and Love to you.
I love your first memory of a beautiful night with your former husband and grandson and his girlfriend. I love those cherished times with loved ones, where you almost feel like one, organic whole. You are such an amazing person and I thank you for your channel. ❤
My sister is passed away now, but for years her husband would call her after work and ask what she wanted to have for dinner, and he'd get it from a restaurant and bring it home for both of them to eat. - I had to adjust my thinking to even absorb such a loving thing to do. ... I could enjoy that.
I'm so tired of cooking mediocre meals and how much time it takes to cook and clean up, for a five minute meal. - ❤️❤️❤️❤️ maybe TAKE TURNS COOKING, or cook together.❤️❤️❤️❤️
Seeing Desi run around is happiness enough!!! Love when you both end your video singing...🐾🐾🐕🐕🐾🐾🐕🐕🐾
I found your channel recently. I have always been alone with my dogs and bought a house at 31. I watched the video the other night where you got Desi and I am so happy he got a human that loves him so much and now he even has a yard to run around in and I have to say your duets are priceless. Love your house the neighborhood looks wonderful.
Of course neighbors count! I have established relationships with neighbors that are from 17 plus years younger to 17 years older. There is such a richness to that. And, as a single woman for now, a sense of security. Desi and you have such a beautiful life. Sharing it makes my life more mindful and beautiful!
I have been widowed for 15 years. I could never totally put into words why I never wanted to marry again. I was 1 month away from my 51st birthday. So not ancient. :) You said it perfectly. I would have to change. I am lonely at times, but not enough to have to rearrange my life that much. Thank you again for your lovely video. I always love them! Blessings ❤
I was married for 48 yrs. and then he passed
Now 5years later when asked if I would marry again...why..I've already had the best
But really...I've learned I don't want expitations expected of me ....
I enjoy my family and their friends and people I meet....I love my life
And Susan you have a wonderful beautiful life ❤
I agree. My dear, sweeet husband passed in January. There is absolutely no one who could possibly replace him. And I have no intention of ever trying to find someone. I'm sure he'll be waiting for me on the other side. Both of my adult children and my grandchildren are less than a mile from my home. I'm sandwiched between them. I am content.
Desi, Desi, how precious are you and a great singer too. Wonderful video.
I soon will be 71. I have lived alone for 22 years. I was never lucky enough to own a house. So, I made my home where ever I was living, a real home. Home truly is where you hang your hat. I now live with my sister who is disabled and my life has made another turn. Desi doing his little stretches just cracks me up. You truly have been blessed.
I'm moving soon, I'm excited, I'm 71 years old and still love adventure!
Susan,I about spit my coffee as you retold your grandsons raccoon story. They are such gifts to us as grandparents. I never thought your move would be a mistake, as you seem to have lived a life of knowing your heart, but now, you are at the age where your head listens. My grandson and son are 6 minutes down the road and they add so much to our lives, yet we all respect that we have our own lives as well. I adore you, Desi and your thoughtful content. I hope you can know how many women have gathered strength and comfort from you sharing your life so openly. I too am a very friendly introvert and need to work on cultivating more friends, but that is on me. Thank you for your willingness to open up about so much, as so many travel similar roads. Have a beautiful week and give Desi an extra biscuit for singing right on cue! 🎶❤
This video reminded me of David Whyte's poem...
The House of Belonging
I awoke
this morning
in the gold light
turning this way
and that
thinking for
a moment
it was one
day
like any other.
But
the veil had gone
from my
darkened heart
and
I thought
it must have been the quiet
candlelight
that filled my room,
it must have been
the first
easy rhythm
with which I breathed
myself to sleep,
it must have been
the prayer I said
speaking to the otherness
of the night.
And
I thought
this is the good day
you could
meet your love,
this is the gray day
someone close
to you could die.
This is the day
you realize
how easily the thread
is broken
between this world
and the next
and I found myself
sitting up
in the quiet pathway
of light,
the tawny
close grained cedar
burning round
me like fire
and all the angels of this housely
heaven ascending
through the first
roof of light
the sun has made.
This is the bright home
in which I live,
this is where
I ask
my friends
to come,
this is where I want
to love all the things
it has taken me so long
to learn to love.
This is the temple
of my adult aloneness
and I belong
to that aloneness
as I belong to my life.
There is no house
like the house of belonging.
There is no house
like the house of belonging.
wow!
Such a great sentiment!! Thank you!!
My mother taught me, “You take yourself with you wherever you go.” You are a light that shines wherever you are. You light up a room. And incidentally, you’ve created a gorgeous home. Be sure you acknowledge how special you are 💜😊💜
I think you did the best thing for you. Your house is beautiful. Neighborhood friends are fantastic. Desi loves the yard. I love his singing. I heard the voice saying grandma. So sweet and special. And your oldest grandson wanting to spend time talking to you. That is a true blessing. You have done the right thing by moving.
Thank you so much....just, thank you Barbara!
Something you said about being a woman rang ever so true with me. I will never, ever want another husband. I love the one I’ve got , but I do sometimes think, at age 81, that I am tired of the burden of always considering another person in every aspect of my life. It is not a requirement my husband imposes on me, it is my nature. It seems natural , probably because of my role models growing up, that I cook, and do laundry, manage the budget, hire all repairmen, see to the lawn management, have my own car serviced. Never troubling my life partner to do anything that I am perfectly able to do. What new man would be happy with a woman who doesn’t want to accommodate his food preferences, change churches, get to know his children and entertain his extended family in their old tradition ways. No, thank you. I have had all that and it’s been great, but I don’t need or want a repeat with a new cast of characters.
Oh Susan...
Thank you for opening your heart and home to us. This has got to be my most favorite glimpse into your life. The beauty of your words, your artist expression captured in your filming and editing, and the way you incorporate them into your decorating is just so inspiring. I admire your boldness in making your move, a defining moment in history that will change your heart forever in so many ways...your family is blessed to have you so nearby. What value you have added to their lives, though I know you'd say the same! Thank you for sharing your talent with us...and Dezi singing is the cherry on the top!❤
Blessings,
Cathy❤😊
Desi is the only dog I have heard sing. Amazing! Great video.
Wow, thank you!
I was divorced turning 66 it was the most unhappy marriage and i longed to live alone . I met some nice men along the way , but there was nothing that moved me to enter another relationship . I am happy to live alone and i am like you when in another marriage i have to give up what i like to do and my alone time i very much cherish .It may sound selfish , but i already have been there , so i truly do not have to repeat it . Your new House looks great and your beautiful decorations and of course you have a little buddy Desi that loves you unconditional . Keep on praying and be at peace .
I know I'll sound like a broken record but I am just so thankful for you and your videos. I wish it was a two sided relationship but this is our little "friendship" and I'm just going to be grateful for my Sunday afternoons where I can catch up with you and Desi. You both make me so very happy. Thank you for being here for all of us.
You have created the most beautiful home for you and sweet little Desi! Be happy in that knowledge and don't worry. I am alone too and I struggle everyday to pay my bills but I have peace now because I know who I am.
If you are a senior, please make sure to check out the senior services in your city and county. You might find some financial relief that would help.
It is wisdom what you are saying. As we age and i am soon to be 74 and it is good to be close to family even if there isn’t a lot of interaction. We can’t put limitations on our lives like not moving etc. We just need to pray of course for the Lord’s guidance. I am a therapist and see trauma survivors. One of the things I tell my clients is it’s about establishing peace in life. It’s all about achieving peace no drama. It is a longer journey for some to arrive at but it is achievable. Victims of trauma have a high tolerance for pain that they don’t deserve. Love you Susan. So grateful for you being a voice of courage and encouragement ❤
Happy Anniversary I just love your home. I have a cozy apt
Im alone my fiancee passed 12 years ago and I haven't dated or anything. I have a hard time on Sundays, I'm alone on Sundays, I feel it's a family day and dinner that's how it used to be, but my kids and there families go other places. I just think of old traditions that we don't do anymore, oh well. I enjoy your channel so much
God bless and much love 💞
I feel so lucky you are here Cindy! we have a great family of gals here...( a few great guys too!)
Your not alone. ❤
You’re not alone, a lot of us are in the same boat. Glad your here.
We all are one big family here. Life is beautiful enjoy every second of it. Alone doesn't always mean lonely look at it as quiet time. You are loved❤😊
@cindyholt - you're not alone, I too suffer life unpleasantness in similar ways, been divorced for over 25 years and have zero interest in remarrying at age 68, have one daughter, she has decided to not have children, she lives with her boyfriend (they live 30-minutes' drive away) he feels the same way about zero kids. They both stay away from me most of the time, my daughter used to live with me until she reached age 30 but felt the need to move out of my large 2500 sq.ft. house to live with him... so now I have my 10-year-old Havanese dog, my life has become very lonely and a bit dull, I'm thinking to sell my house relocate near other family members and downsize... but I try to make the best of life in the meantime.
Time with you in your videos goes by too fast. Being with you is like being with a dear and lovely friend. Thank you for your words, your thoughts, your wisdom, and just sharing with us what you love and are grateful for. Sending love and hugs.
I absolutely agree. I feel this same way.💞
You're my inspiration Susan!! Hugs to both you and Desi!
Gosh you are so kind! Thank you so much for being here! Happy weekend to you! Susan & Desi
My sister, who’s in her 70s, just helped me (69) answer my question about relocating last night (Sat) before watching your video today. I wrote down what she said: 1) stay put until all your doctors give you medical clearance that you’re truly well 2) secure new pt-time job to complete tasks already in motion at current home and 3)travel close to home/explore the many towns/states nearby and see if another place feels more like home than where you are living now. Short list, not exciting but objective from a beloved sister who’s seen more than the winds knocked out of my sails. As I watched the daffodils dance in the wind this morning, I felt satisfied with the plan. It’s definitely Spring 🌷and my heart does long for “fun!” 😊 So I will focus on gratitude and take it one day at a time. 🙏🏻
Susan, SO happy you & Desi made the perfect decision for you! You have a lovely home and many special memories from your first year 🎉 Wishing you oodles more, DearFriend! 💕
I got divorced after 14 years of marriage - I matured and he stayed in a marijuana induced state that he promised he would quit after we got married. I tried but I wanted to raise two children, not three! I thought to myself, if love didn’t work why would I want something else? I just stopped looking and moved on and am much happier with just me. My grown children and my grandchildren are who I live for now. They are the joy of my life and I am grateful for everything I have.
People who been smoking marijuana from an age cannot sit. It has altered their brain. I work in home care ans some of the parents can;t keep any thing organizwd including thier lives. Thier homes are in disarray. They have to take a hit if they go out side and when they come inside. They don't work. I doubet they could function on a job. They should have never legalize it.
I moved to S America at age 69 and am the leader of a hot rockin Blues Band..I m 73 now and living my best life ever free of stress and Insanity ! Keep yourselves HEALTHY !
This is my all time favorite video (so far). I was finishing every sentence with you. I just moved last August to my very first home that I bought all by myself-four minutes away from my daughter and her family. All of your concerns were all of my concerns. I also look at the pictures of the house I bought when it was staged and take great pride in how I’ve improved it. Isn’t it satisfying? I can so appreciate all the work you’ve gone to and how much more beautiful that little house is now that’s it’s had your own personal touches. And when you said Now what? I laughed because I finished that sentence with you! And the man thing! Yes! Do I want another man? Do I not want another man? I go back and forth! But oh! How wonderful it is that you understand, Susan. I am sure there are lots and lots of us going through the same thing. Thank you for expressing it so perfectly for all of us!
Oh Linda! How wonderful you understand!!! Sista!!!! xxoo I go back and forth too!!!
We have moved 9 times!! Each time was the right one for that timeframe. Never say never! So glad you are happy and with family!!
Desi stretching his legs is beyond cute ❤️ Happy one year anniversary. I moved two years ago into affordable housing after renting rooms for years from so many sometimes abusive people I am happily single and embrace my solitude . I don’t miss a relationship and my self is priority and much healing. Living in the moment is priceless .My apartment is my beautiful safe haven
Well, dear Susan, you really got me this week.
I'd been working in my flowerbeds all day, with so many thoughts running through my head.
I came in the house to shower and watch your video.
I was completely surprised by the exact thoughts you expressed, I'd literally just had.
What if something breaks down? What would the expenses be?
What if I don't have the strength to do my flowerbeds next year?...
What would I do if something happens to my husband of 42 years, and I'm suddenly alone?
Things that make you go hummmmmm....
Why is it we exhaust so much energy on things that haven't even happened yet?
Perhaps it comes with age.
All we can do is take baby steps and one breath at a time.
We simply have to meet life as it comes, and enjoy each day to the best of our ability.
You should be so proud of yourself and the home & environment YOU have created.
Furthermore you did it all without the assistance or influence of a man.
You are a loving and caring person, Susan.
You reflect that in all you do.
Although you have turned down offers from men in the past.....perhaps it was the wrong time.
"Mr. Perfect for you" may just be waiting in Big Rapids...
So often, love is like a butterfly that lands when you least expect it, and aren't even looking.
You'll know when it's right. ❤
Rooting for you always... whatever you decide.
Huge hugs from Texas.
Deborah
P.S. Happy 1st year of your new beautiful life, In your lovely home!
Your words are so beautiful....I worry about things and then when my head is clear...they just seem to slip through my fingers. I wish I knew why I feel so confident things will be ok...but, we women are so strong...and so brave...my love to you! Susan & Desi
❤❤❤❤❤
You ROCK Susan!
Always know I'm but a few thousand miles away!! 😂 😂
Ok, now i know you're smiling!
However, I really am here when needed.
Technology these days...who knew!
Rest well, beautiful friend..... until next week.
MaWah!
❤
Moving 9 times in 40+ years has taught me that it is important to realize that community is essential. Having a neighborhood, a work family, volunteering and taking care of yourself first is the best way to be a vibrant member of any community. The other thing I have just learned
( or internalized) is that....
you can keep Anything...but you can't keep Everything!
It's so easy to overspend and cause yourself to panic when that is the primary way we keep ourselves entertained. But reaching out and finding joy in people...that's where our true treasure lies! You are living proof of that. Your closing phrase about adventure keeping us young is key. Within your energy level and means, find joy in connections!
I NEVER THOUGHT I would look forward to seeing a TH-camr every Saturday night...but because of you ...I do!!!🎉 Love to all and a hug and kiss for Desi❤
From fashion to artistry to heart felt conversation...you are the Bomb SASSY Lady!!!😂
I never thought I would look forward to seeing a TH-camr each Saturday either. But I like Little Poet!
I moved the week after I turned 65! Game changer. I did the opposite. I sold my house in a stagnating town for me. I am in Florida and I feel younger! In a fabulous apartment for me and my dog. We walk every day, and there is so much to do. I promised I would grow young in Florida and I am. I do love your home and neighborhood, it works perfect for you. And I love Desi.
I moved 6 months ago, back to somewhere I lived 20+ years ago. Most of my friends from back than have moved or decided to remain friends with my ex instead (their choice not my insistence). So Be It and bless them as they go. I now live right down the street from my sister, and while that's lovely in it's way, I really need to make more new friends that fit with who and how I am now. I'm content alone but need more social outlets is how I see it. Now that the weather's warming I intend to create what I need!🌹
What a blessing to own a beautiful home and live near your children/grandchildren! No need for a man, life is good!
I love living alone, maybe too much.....I sometimes have to force myself to go out to socialize......Im never bored or lonely at home, just content.......I love your house and Big Rapids looks like an amazing place to live! Im glad you are so close to your family.....Love Desi too!! See you next week....( I have to tell you Im thankful for you, last night news broke about Iran attacking Israel.....I was so uneasy but then remembered you post on Saturdays, I watched this video and it calmed and distracted me) pray for Peace....thank you Susan
I'm 61 I love living alone too there's freedom in not having to please another person or hear any noise I couldn't live in Michigan but it's a beautiful place.
Hello, thank you for your channel. I live in London, UK and I look forward to your videos on Saturday night/Sunday morning. I love them. I find your videos so gentle and thought-provoking. It would appear that growing older is a time for deep reflection and trying to be true to your values. Finding joy in the simple things in life - family but ultimately love. Thanks again. ❤❤❤
This is one of your very best !!!
Congratulations on your one-year anniversary! It's that little voice calling to you in the forest that is the reason you moved. Those grandchildren warm the heart like no other. I'm so glad for you that you feel like you are home.
Oh Susan, you saw the warnings signals and the dangers of self-indulgence! You took a step back and reevaluated your lifestyle. That was the safest way to protect yourself. You went from intensive living to pensive living. Now you live in the moment of thoughtfulness and considerations of self and family. This gives others hope. You are one of the lucky ones. 🕊🕊💗
Hi Susan I lost you for a long while, my phone gave up the ghost, but I am so glad to find you and Desi again, I missed you! I am going through a difficult time in my marriage, I know now, I would never marry again! I don't think it will resolve, but just sitting it out, but you have given me inspiration that I have a future, thank you
Welcome back!
I am so glad you are embracing the beauty and peace of being alone !!! I believe it’s a gift.
"I'm Home ". I love that. I'm originally from Texas grew up in Chicago moved and got married and live in North Carolina. Been married 44 years. And will be living alone for the rest of my remaining life starting at 64. Im 62 now. When you ssid I'm Home i said to my self i know thst feeling. When ever I travel back to Texas to visit family as soon as I cross that Texas border I say , " I'm Home ". My dream is to be Home again. Be blessed Susan , Thank you for being a friend I've never met personally. Moving On Down The Road 🎈